Monkey Magic!

The Beijing Olympics. Bit of a dodgy subject, and I'm not sure I approve of our athletes going out there to compete; after all, we boycotted South Africa's sporting events and teams for decades. Still, politics aside, at least one good thing has come of the event already:



Brilliant.

Actual Conversation

(Names withheld to protect the innocent)

A: You know, football can be a bit dull. They should replace the players with glamour models and fill the playing area with jelly. Perhaps strawberry jelly.

B: Or even better, instead of twenty-two models, have forty-four!

A: That's just silly.

B: Why?

A: If you double the number of models, you'd have to double the amount of jelly, but then you'd have too much jelly and the models would drown. And then you'd have forty-four dead models suspended in jelly, and who wants that?

It's Just Rounders For Fat Blokes, Innit?

There are many very very good reasons to deride baseball, but this story highlights surely one of the most damning aspects of the game: apparently, exactly 79.4% of its fans are complete knob-ends.