The Colleges Greatest Pranks,

Goofs and Practical Jokes

BY JAY BUSBEE 90
ILLUSTRATIONS BY ROBERT DE MICHIELL

ith all apologies to the hundreds of esteemed professors at the

College, pranks are the real memories that students carry with
them forever. You may not remember what you learned in econ or
Elizabethan literature more than three days after the final exam, but
youll be telling your grandkids about the time you soaked a tennis
ball in cologne, lit it on fire and hurled it down your dorm hall.
Certain college pranks have achieved legendary status, inspiring Similarly immortal pranks have involved stealing sacred icons or
awe, admiration and legions of copycats. Perhaps the finest college mascots from a rival school, or hoisting unbelievably large objects into
prank of all time took place in 1961, when Caltech students infiltrated unlikely places. While William and Mary cant lay claim to such world-
the Rose Bowl game between Washington and Minnesota. The stu- beating pranks as those, we do hold up our end of the bargain, even if
dents placed colored placards in the seats of the Washington fans, and we skirt the bounds of propriety and legality doing so.
then, dressed as Washington cheerleaders, exhorted the crowd to hold The College administration tries to take an understanding view of
their placards high. The result? CALTECH spelled out across one pranks, within reason. What for one person is a prank, for another
entire side of the Rose Bowl. person goes too far, says Dave Gilbert, associate dean of students

48 WINTER 2008 WILLIAM & MARY

and director of student conduct. Its a difficult line to express, but Blasted rooms from afar by tilting garbage cans full of water
what we try to do is ensure the individual rights of every student to against the door and knocking; filling paper bags full of shaving cream,
enjoy their College career as long as their conduct doesnt infringe inserting the open end under the door and then stomping; or piling
on the rights of others. baby powder at the crack under the door and then using a hairdryer
College pranks have surely been around since the earliest days of to blow the powder into the room. (Since these involve property dam-
William and Mary, though no records exist of, say, Thomas Jefferson age, they often end up on Gilberts desk.)
1762, LL.D. 1782 hoisting effigies to the roof of the Wren Building or Various Contributors
turning all of his roommates possessions upside down. Even so, Col-
lege students have always proven resourceful when inspiration strikes, Imprisoned residents in Yates Hall by bricking them in with cin-
so we can assume that such tales have been lost to history. der blocks or tying their doorknob to the knob across the hall.
Recently, the Alumni Association surveyed the College community Courtesy of Emily Lowry 00
to recall favorite pranks from undergraduate days, and we received
dozens of fine (and hysterical) recollections. Many, sadly, cant be pub-
lished; this is a family magazine, after all. Many more remain locked Fraternity Pranks
firmly in the memories of the participants, to be shared only when ost of the pranks submitted could end up as states evidence
theyre certain that statutes of limitations have run out. These are and thus cannot be repeated here, but some of the printable
some of the best of what we received, however, with some names with- ones include the following:
held to protect both victim and victimizer.
One early-1980s Sigma Phi Epsilon pledge class scavenger hunt
had its pledges retrieve a Crim Dell duck. Some forward-thinking
Dorm Room Pranks pledges raised the stakes, bringing back not a Crim Dell duck, but a
orm rooms are ground zero for pranking activity. Woe to the poor swan from the Governors Palace pond. They deposited it right in the
undergrad who has a prank-minded roommate or suitemate; the center of a stunned Sig Ep party; the swan was returned to the pond
possibilities for victimization are endless. At the College, pranksters have: confused but unharmed.
Courtesy of Rich Saunders 82
Filled entire dorm rooms with balloons, crumpled newspaper
(that might possibly qualify as a fire hazard, yes?), and thousands of During pledge week 1986, Theta Delta Chi foolishly challenged
Dixie cups full of water that must be cleaned up one at a time. its pledges to try to turn some of the hazing heat back on the broth-
Courtesy of Michael P. Hennessy 80, Heidi Elizabeth Pixton Copa 68 ers. The pledges retaliated for a week of harsh treatment by simulta-

ALUMNI MAGAZINE SUMMER 2008 49

ALUMNI MAGAZINE WINTER 2008 49
 neously collecting huge trash cans full of slushy ice water and coating In the fall of 1972, a few residents of Old Dominion Hall decided
almost all of the units stairwells with Vaseline. On command, the their residence needed a little freshening up. They swiped a Jolly
pledges dumped the ice water on sleeping brothers closest to the Green Giant figure from a Delta Delta Delta Homecoming float and
doors; those frat brothers who had not been drenched tried to give hoisted it up to the roof of the building. The giant overlooked the cam-
chase, they slipped on the Vaseline, and the pledges who knew pus for several days afterward.
where to step to avoid the Vaseline got away scot-free. Courtesy of Bob Wilson 75
Courtesy of Jas Short 90

One night in the early 1950s, Kappa Alpha (KA) recognized that Quick Hits
its supply of alcohol was running low, and hatched an ingenious ometimes the simplest pranks are best: quick hits are often the
scheme. Several brothers visited nearby Sigma Alpha Epsilon (SAE) most effective and the most memorable.
and informed them that a party was afoot with more available
women than KA could handle. SAE eagerly agreed to help out with Many students in animal physiology lab were participating in a
the problem, and left their lodge to join in the party. While they were test to evaluate kidney function by testing their own urine at intervals
gone, brothers from KA snuck into their lodge and stole their entire throughout one day. For the final samples, one group of partners
beer-filled fridge. And SAE showed up to the party only to find a Ana Kuhn 84, David Brand 84, Kenneth Manning 83 and Laurie
few guys playing poker. Thornton 84 appeared confused by their results, wondering why
Courtesy of Jim Dillard 59 they were so out of line with previous readings. Maybe well get bet-
ter results if we run it through again, one partner said, and the team
drank its urine cups empty. The cups were full of apple juice, but
Property Pranks the other students in lab that day did not know that.
ollege students usually dont have many possessions, which Courtesy of Laurie Thornton 84
makes those possessions all the more valuable and all the
more vulnerable to pranks. In the fall of 1986, one student accompanied his family to a Parents
Weekend dinner at Berrets Seafood. When his father ordered a whole
One unfortunate soul who owned a small two-door Honda Civic lobster, the student recognized an opportunity. He asked for the lobsters
awoke one morning in 1983 to find it wedged tightly between two cleaned-out carapace, and the shell started making its way around
trees near the Yates parking lot. Students had lifted the economically Dupont Hall, showing up everywhere from beds to closets to toilet seats.
friendly but relatively light car right out of its parking space. Courtesy of Jay Busbee 90
Courtesy of Jim Pratt 86
The exit doors from many dorms resemble those that lead into
Students in the Botetourt Complex came back to their dorms individual rooms. A couple of Stith Hall students took advantage of
one afternoon around 1980 to find a bed suspended three stories high this similarity by decorating the exit door with fake nametags and a
above the courtyard. Students had hoisted the bed into the air via message board. More than a few students wandered around lost at
long, long ropes run through the exterior staircases at each dorm.
Everyone got a good laugh out of it, even the victim until he real-
ized whose bed it was.
Courtesy of Reed Hopkins 81

50 WINTER 2008 WILLIAM & MARY

the far end of the hall, not wanting to barge into Debbies and Most people dont even think about pranks being a potential safe-
Lisas room by accident. ty hazard, he says, and once they do, theyre quick to apologize.
Courtesy of Patty Anderson 85 When it comes to punishment, intention counts, as does the out-
come. He points to the classic penny in the door trick jamming a
In the fall of 1971, one procrastinating student annoyed his fellow penny into a door to wedge it shut as a prank that could have seri-
roommate by staying up all night writing a paper. The student fin- ous consequences if, say, a fire broke out. Fortunately, however,
ished his paper, paper clipped it, and left it on the center of his desk pranks at the College generally dont hurt much more than the ego
while he went to breakfast. The roommate safely stashed the paper, and perhaps some dorm room furniture now and then.
then burned several blank pages and left the paper clip sitting in the The best thing about pranks is that the possibilities are literally
midst of the ashes. One can only imagine the horror in the writers endless; as long as there are incoming freshmen, there are new prank
heart at seeing his work burnt to a crisp. targets and new pranks to be created. Odds are that as youre read-
Courtesy of Bob Wilson 75 ing this, some enterprising College students are planning, preparing
or executing a prank.
That list only scratches the surface; every student whos ever And when that prank hits, make sure to let us know at alumni.
attended the College can certainly think of a few more to add. The magazine@[Link]. Wed love to run a sequel to this article, and
vast majority of pranks are one-and-done, quick hits that leave (hope- thats no joke.
fully) everybody laughing and the victim plotting retribution.
The College receives relatively few reports where pranks have Jay Busbee 90 is a writer for Yahoo! Sports and Atlanta Magazine. He lives in
gone awry, and in almost all of those instances, Gilbert says, the Atlanta, where he and his wife, a University of Virginia grad, battle for the
prankster mends his or her ways as soon as the College steps in. allegiances of their two children.

ALUMNI MAGAZINE WINTER 2008 51