This is probably one of the most asked about topics in our Church today.

There are
so many singles, including myself, who look around and see very little ministry
directed toward them in their calling in life. Though the reality of this
perception may be slightly distorted due to the deep longing in ourselves to be
married, because of the image of God in us, which we will talk about in a second.
And, though this may be changing as we speak, I wish to, as a single man myself,
and one who just experienced my first relationship and the heartbreak that came
with the annulment of that, I wish to put my experience in the mix for the purpose
that perhaps it may be helpful to some, and glorifying to my God.

The first thing I want to do is to admit, or confess, that the longing within
you to be married is good, in fact it is "very good". God created man in His image,
and that image is most fully expressed through the union of one man and one woman
in the bond of marriage.

"So God created man in His Own image, in the image of God He created him; male and
female He created them." (Genesis 1:27) and again in Genesis 2:22-25,

"And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and
brought her to the man. Then the man said, 'This at last is bone of my bones and
flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.'
Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife,
and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were
not ashamed."

Notice first that God is the One who brings the woman to the man. Second, notice
that the man actually sings a song, a song of joy, at receiving the woman. This is
rooted in the fact that man had something missing by himself, "it is not good that
man should be alone". The completion of that image of God in Himself is the woman
being joined to the man. These two things are wonderful, and, as God says, are
"very good". But, what about the person who is single? Are they somehow a lesser
representation of the image of God? Are we purposeless until we get married? Is it
even possible for us to be satisfied in God if we are single? Are we pleasing to
Him? I know that at least some of you are feeling this, because I have felt this.
At least that's assuming that I am not an oddity, though I most certainly am. But,
notwithstanding this fact, that I believe is quite evident, namely my uniqueness, I
will dive into the answers to these questions!

"Can I be satisfied in my singleness?" When I think about the fact that I'm
single, especially now in light of the fact that I went through a season in which I
was not, it leads to depression and hopelessness. Depression because I start to
think that I'm not attractive enough to not be single, or that my personality is
irritating and inconsiderate, or that somehow even my personal convictions and
commitments are somehow standing in the way. Hopelessness because I do not see
anything in myself that is able or bold enough to attempt to engage in a
relationship, or that I already failed in a relationship, not due to immorality but
I believe due to sins which appear more subtly, such as pride, and I see no hope of
doing any better in the future. How can I be satisfied when I am so wretched and
unable? Though it may be difficult to do at first, I will explain one reason why in
a second, but the answer is to take your gaze off of yourself and look to Christ
"the author and perfecter of our faith". This is difficult at first because it can
be tempting to say you are looking to Jesus, when you are rather looking to
yourself looking at Jesus. When you have spent a significant amount of time in a
pattern of looking at yourself, then it can be very easy to look at yourself and
admire how great you are at looking to Jesus. One of the greatest remedies to this
is to look to Christ in specific aspects of His being; see we are already starting
to draw our focus off ourselves and to Christ! Looking to the cross is perhaps,
even most certainly, the most revealing of who God is(Romans 1:16-17, Romans 3:23-
26). This is expressed in Hebrews 12:2, its words I will quote now, at least those
that are relevant to the subject at hand, "looking to Jesus...who for the joy that
was set before Him endured the cross". How many times are you joyful in your
suffering? Jesus Christ is the most perfect example of joy in suffering in the
dichotomy of His pleading to the Father in the garden, and the passage just quoted.
This same Jesus, as the passage quoted says, is also, "the author and perfecter of
our faith". That same Christ who was in a state of immense suffering, not only
forsaken by man(Isaiah 53:3), but who also, in His flesh, felt abandoned by
God(Matthew 27:46). It would seem I keep going back to these passages in my posts,
though I believe they are worth going back to a thousand and one times. When we see
Christ, in His office of Great High Priest, who is acquainted with out human
weaknesses and struggles, and see Him exalted at the right hand of the Father, we
find simultaneously One who can relate and sympathize with us in our time of need,
while being absolutely ready and able to assist us in all of those seasons, however
long or intense.

Another way we receive a tremendous amount of satisfaction is by recognizing

that we are guaranteed marriage. What? Guaranteed? As certainly as the promise
sealed by the blood of Jesus. We will not only be participants in the wedding party
or planning committee of this promised wedding, but we are to be one of the
participants in the wedding ceremony. What? When? Where? At the end of days, we
will be eternally wed to Christ. In fact, our present condition is preparing us for
that wedding day. Even earthly marriages themselves are in a temporal union, "[f]or
in the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage". Every Christian
is given his path of life by God for his good and God's glory(Romans 8:28, 2
Corinthians 4:15), and God's will for all His people is their sanctification(1
Thessalonians 4:3). As stated before, this path, even pilgrimage, culminates in the
supreme, eternal wedding, "I saw the holy city, New Jerusalem, coming down out of
heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her Husband". This union will
constitute the perfection of God's presence with His people, "He will dwell with
them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God",
the end of crying and death, mourning, pain, and all the ails of the former things,
simply put, all things will be made new! Is this simply a doctrinal truth that
remains a reality in our heads? I would hope you have read my post on doctrine to
understand that doctrine does not, indeed it cannot, remain in the head, but Psalm
16:11 is helpful in answering this. "You make known to me the path of life; in your
presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore."
When God is present with us, and we commune with Him, we are complete, we are
fulfilled. It is when we look to other things, and place our trust in them that we
lack joy and contentment. Surely fullness of joy will be completely brought in on
the day of our eternal wedding, but it is written, "behold, I am with you always,
even to the end of the age" (Matthew 28:20). To quote the words of my favorite
hymn, "prone to wander, Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love, take my
heart Lord, take and seal it, seal it for Thy courts above". Though we are not yet
perfected this side of our wedding day, and we are hindered from fullness of joy by
our remaining sin, when we see the Bridegroom, when we see Him as He is, then we
will be transformed(1 Corinthians 13:12, 15:51-52).

This post will be ongoing and will be added onto as I see fit, but I feel tired and
simultaneously feel it must be posted, so I will continue later.