2 2

Writing and Language Practice

35 MIN U TES, 44 Q UE S T IO NS

Turn to Section 2 of your answer sheet to answer the questions in this section.D

DIRECTIONS

Each passage below is accompanied by a number of questions. For some questions, you
will consider how the passage might be revised to improve the expression of ideas. For
other questions, you will consider how the passage might be edited to correct errors in
sentence structure, usage, or punctuation. A passage or a question may be accompanied by
one or more graphics (such as a table or graph) that you will consider as you make revising
and editing decisions.

Some questions will direct you to an underlined portion of a passage. Other questions will
direct you to a location in a passage or ask you to think about the passage as a whole.

After reading each passage, choose the answer to each question that most effectively
improves the quality of writing in the passage or that makes the passage conform to the
conventions of standard written English. Many questions include a “NO CHANGE” option.
Choose that option if you think the best choice is to leave the relevant portion of the
passage as it is.

Questions 1-15 are based on the following passage. 1

A) NO CHANGE
The Min: A Ship from the Desert B) shipyard: in
C) shipyard; in
[1]
D) shipyard in
In 2004, a team of archaeologists discovered the
remains of an ancient 1 shipyard. In a series of caves at 2
a site named Wadi Gawasis in the 2 Egypt’s desert. The A) NO CHANGE
team found a wealth of well-preserved planks, anchors, B) Egyptian’s
oars, and other sailing equipment. [A] These objects were C) Egyptians
D) Egyptian
determined to be approximately four thousand years old.
[2]
3
We have long known that ancient Egyptians sailed A) NO CHANGE
the freshwater Nile River. However, until Wadi Gawasis B) they
was excavated, there had been little evidence that 3 we C) she
D) it

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 2 2
had also sailed the ocean. [B] Hieroglyphic inscriptions 4
suggested that some of the excavated objects had been If the writer were to delete the underlined portion
used in an expedition to the ancient Red Sea port of Punt, (adjusting the punctuation as needed), the paragraph
would primarily lose an explanation of why:
about one thousand miles from Wadi Gawasis. Planks A) evidence of shipworms could indicate that the
pocked with holes bored by shipworms, 4 creatures Wadi Gawasis ships had sailed the ocean.
that live only in salt water, supported the hypothesis that B) archaeologists thought Punt was the destination
of the Wadi Gawasis expedition.
ancient Egyptians had ventured into the ocean.
C) shipworms may have bored holes in the planks of
[3] the Wadi Gawasis ships.
D) there was evidence of shipworms at Wadi
5 Florida State University professor Cheryl Ward,
Gawasis.
a maritime archaeologist, drew up plants for building
a ship like those the ancient Egyptians had sailed. The
5
completed ship, sixty-six feet long and sixteen feet
Which choice most effectively ties the information
wide, would be named Min of the Desert in honor of the in the preceding paragraph to the topic of this
Egyptian god 6 who’s likeness adorned many Wadi paragraph?
A) NO CHANGE
Gawasis 7 artifacts.
B) Drawing on her doctoral research on ancient
Egyptian hull design,
C) Guided by these discoveries,
D) With the best of intentions,

6
A) NO CHANGE
B) who’s liked and
C) whose likeness
D) whose likely

7
A) NO CHANGE
B) remainders.
C) parts.
D) things.

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 2 2
[4] 8
A) NO CHANGE
Four shipbuilders constructed the Min by using many
B) tools, materials, and, techniques
of the same 8 tools, materials, and techniques, that
C) tools, materials, and techinques
the shipbuilders of Wadi Gawasis had used. [C] Like the D) tools materials and techniques
ancient Egyptians, the modern builders used mortise-
and-tenon joints, 9 when the end of one plank is
9
fitted into a slot in the adjoining plank. Ward compared A) NO CHANGE
building the Min 10 to putting together a jigsaw puzzle B) for whom
11 because the two processes are analogous. C) in which
[5] D) DELETE the underlined portion.

In December 2008, an international crew of twenty-

10
four people made weeklong ocean voyage in the 12 Min
A) NO CHANGE
to test: the ship’s seaworthiness. [D] During the voyage, B) as
C) or
D) by

11
A) NO CHANGE
B) because of the construction methods.
C) to make a comparison.
D) DELETE the underlined portion and end the
sentence with a period.
the similarities of the building process is already explained

12
A) NO CHANGE
B) Min, to test,
C) Min; to test
D) Min to test

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 2 2
the Min was able to sail roughly seven miles per hour, 13
about twice as fast as Ward had expected. Though it A) NO CHANGE
was not always smooth 13 sailing, Ward recalls almost B) sailing—Ward recalls almost colliding with a
reef—the
colliding with a reef the Min was found to be more than
C) sailing, Ward recalls almost colliding with a reef.
adequate for a voyage to Punt. The
D) sailing, Ward recalls, almost colliding with a reef,
the

Questions 14 and 15 ask about the preceding passage as

a whole.

14
The writer wants to add the following sentence to the
essay:
The crew occasionally used the oars, but a single
sail was generally sufficient to propel the ship.
This sentence would most logically be placed at:
A) Point A in Paragraph 1.
B) Point B in Paragraph 2.
C) Point C in Paragraph 4.
D) Point D in Paragraph 5.

15
Suppose the writer’s primary purpose had been
to instruct the reader how to build a replica of an
ancient ship. Would this essay accomplish that
purpose?
A) Yes; the writer describes the use of mortise-and-
tenon joints in detail.
B) Yes; the writer provides the measurements of the
Min.
C) No; the writer instead emphasizes the inspiration
for and significance of a particular replica.
D) No; the writer instead focuses on providing
details about how and why Wadi Gawasis was
excavated.

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 2 2
Questions 16-30 are based on the following passage. 16
A) NO CHANGE
An Italian Garden in California B) Nevertheless,
C) Instead,
[1]
D) Unlike
When I was young, my grandparents’ sprawling
Southern California yard intimidated me. [A] 17
16 Whereas the small, carefully mowed lawn Which of the following choices best indicates the
surrounding my own nearby house, their yard was a disorder of the garden?
A) NO CHANGE
huge, 17 unruly garden, like a neighborhood park that
B) contradictory
had been taken over by wildflowers and weeds. Grandpa
C) stormy
worked in his garden every 18 day—planting, and D) blatant
pruning, mixing and staking, weeding and mulching—so
I wondered why it looked so wild and overgrown. 19 18
A) NO CHANGE
B) day—planting and pruning,
C) day, planting, and pruning
D) day, planting and pruning

19
If the writer were to delete the preceding sentence,
this paragraph would primarily lose a statement that:
A) explains why the appearance of the garden
puzzled the narrator.
B) illustrates why the garden appeared wild and
overgrown.
C) establishes that the grandfather resented the
amount of work that the garden required.
D) describes the varieties of plants and flowers and
grew in the garden.

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 2 2
[2] 20
A) NO CHANGE
20 Certainly, Grandpa told 21 myself that the way
B) For the time being,
he grew fruits, vegetables, and herbs conserved space
C) Eventually,
and water. [B] His plantings 22 are complementing each D) At first,
other and were in harmony with 23 the seasons, the sun,
and the acidity and moisture of the soil. Because of those
21
benefits, he didn’t care how his garden looked. A) NO CHANGE
[3] B) myself about
C) me about
The citrus trees grew in the sunniest part of the
D) me that
24 yard, they flourished there while providing shade
for garlic and mint plants below. [C] Almond, peach,
22
A) NO CHANGE
B) have complemented each other and are
C) complemented each other and were
D) complement each other and were

23
A) NO CHANGE
B) not only the seasons, the sun, but also
C) either the seasons, the sun, and
D) both the seansons, the sun, and

24
A) NO CHANGE
B) yard, I noticed that
C) yard;
D) yard

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 2 2
and cherry trees near the citrus, 25 due to the fact that 25
they were needing as much sun but more nutrients, A) NO CHANGE
were mulched with mounds of compost that Grandpa B) requiring the need for
C) necessarily needing
would mix himself. Fig, pear, and persimmon trees
D) needing
were scattered 26 easy-growing throughout the yard.
There were weathered trellises that supported raspberry,
26
blueberry, and boysenberry bushes crowded together to
The best placement for the underlined portion would
block out weeds. Muddy, 27 rutted paths led to tangled be:
vines of endless varieties of tomatoes—some heavy and A) where it is now.
misshapen, others small and smooth, some even streaked B) before the word fig (adjusting the capitalization as
needed).
purple, green, and red—with basil planted in between the
C) after the word persimmon.
vines to repel insects. Salad greens and 28 herbs, such as
D) after the word were.
arugula, Swiss chard, black kale, rapini, sage, and oregano,
shared one large plot, given their similar moisture
27
requirements. A) NO CHANGE
B) rutted, paths,
C) rutted, paths
D) rutted paths,

28
A) NO CHANGE
B) herbs—such as arugula, Swiss chard, black kale,
rapini, sage, and oregano
C) herbs, such as arugula, Swiss chard, black kale,
rapini, sage, and oregano
D) herbs; such as arugula, Swiss chard, black kale,
rapini, sage, and oregano

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 2 2
[4] 29

29 Meanwhile, I learned that my grandpa’s garden, Which choice most effectively suggests that as
an adult the narrator continued to discover new
his orto, was much like the orto his own grandfather had information about the grandfather’s garden?
cultivated in southern Italy. [D] When I plant a garden, I A) NO CHANGE
might start with my favorite tomato, the sweet Datterini, a B) Years later,
classic cherry tomato variety from southern Italy that my C) However,
D) In short,
grandfather grew so well.

Question 30 asks about the preceding passage as a

whole.

30
The writer wants to add the following sentence to the
essay:
My parents’ tidy rows of flowers required more
watering and chemicals than his garden did, he
said.
This sentence would most logically be placed at:
A) Point A in Paragraph 1.
B) Point B in Paragraph 2.
C) Point C in Paragraph 3.
D) Point D in Paragraph 4.

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 2 2
Questions 31-44 are based on the following passage. 31
A) NO CHANGE
Wave Riding on Lake Michigan B) cool, autumn, winds,
C) cool, autumn, winds
By the time 31 cool autumn winds rush in, kicking
D) cool, autumn winds,
up waves that rock the 32 pier: the sunbathers and
swimmers have already left our beach in Grand Haven,
32
Michigan. The empty beach, with waves pushing so far A) NO CHANGE
onto shore that they would have knocked down sand B) pier; the
castles in July, 33 is our favorite sight. It’s September, and C) pier, the
for my friends and me, it’s finally time to surf our stretch D) pier. The
of the “Third Coast”: the eastern shore of Lake Michigan.
Although on rare occasions we do surf twelve-foot 33
waves 34 here—as we’ve done at Malibu Beach on the A) NO CHANGE
B) were my
West Coast, lake surfing is different from ocean surfing.
C) was my
D) are our

34
A) NO CHANGE
B) here—as we’ve done at Malibu Beach on the West
Coast—
C) here, as we’ve done at Malibu Beach on the West
Coast—
D) here as we’ve done at Malibu Beach on the West
Coast

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 2 2
35 The six- to ten-foot waves we can realistically hope for 35
on Lake Michigan mainly happen in fall and winter, when At this point, the writer is considering adding the
winds often reach twenty-five miles per hour. Our waves, following true statement:

created by local weather systems, are choppy and quick- I have heard about occasional shark attacks on
surfers in the ocean.
moving. This makes them more fun and more challenging
Should the writer make this addition here?
to surf. Ocean waves, on the other hand, are created by A) Yes, because it expresses the essay’s main
tides and storms a thousand miles offshore. 36 They are argument about why people prefer lake surfing to
ocean surfing.
usually bigger than lake waves and smoother and more
B) Yes, because it provides support for the author’s
predictable. claim that lake surfing isn’t dangerous.
37 The Great Lakes region is also referred to as the C) No, because it interrupts the description of the
different heights of ocean and lake waves.
“Fresh Coast” because of its fresh water. It doesn’t feel
D) No, because it identifies and advantage of lake
surfing that is discussed in detail later in the
essay.

36
If the writer were to delete the preceding sentence,
this paragraph would primarily lose a statement that:
A) explains the effects of weather on the formation
of both lake and ocean waves.
B) contrasts with the earlier description of how lake
waves are formed.
C) clarifies why ocean waves are choppy and
quick-moving.
D) reiterates the main idea of the paragraph.

37
Given that all the choices are true, which one most
effectively introduces the paragraph and provides a
transition into the rest of the essay?
A) NO CHANGE
B) Unlike the Pacific Ocean, with 63.8 million
square surface miles, Lake Michigan has only
22,400 square surface miles.
C) Michigan has 3,288 miles of Great Lakes
coastline, more coastline than any state other
than Alaska.
D) With 22,400 square surface miles, Lake Michigan
looks like an ocean.

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 2 2
like an ocean when we surf it, though. The fresh water 38
of Lake Michigan makes us 38 slow and heavy on our A) NO CHANGE
boards; it doesn’t have the salt that creates the buoyancy B) travel at low velocity with substantial weight
C) leaden like a rock and ponderous
we get when surfing an ocean. It’s hard to paddle—and to
D) stagnant and weigh a ton
do sharp, carving turns—on Lake Michigan. 39 We add
stability and reduce density by using surfboards that are
39
longer and made with more foam than our ocean boards.
If the writer were to delete the preceding sentence,
By late November, 40 if we wear thick wet suits— the paragraph would primarily lose a statement that:
41 completely with hood, mitts, and booties—so we can A) explain how lake surfers counteract the
difficulties of surfing in fresh water.
B) provides examples of the challenges lake surfers
face as a result of Lake Michigan’s fresh water.
C) identifies a similarity between surfing in Lake
Michigan and ocean surfing.
D) illustrates the advantages created by the
decreased bouyancy of fresh water compared to
salt water.

40
A) NO CHANGE
B) we wore
C) we wear
D) if we wore

41
A) NO CHANGE
B) completely accompanied
C) in completion
D) complete

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 2 2
surf in slushy, freezing water while snow flies around 42
us. 42 Likewise, ice on our beach shuts us out from the A) NO CHANGE
waves. By January, our season is over. We watch most of B) Soon, though,
C) Besides, since
Lake Michigan freeze in winter, thaw in spring, and
D) Rather,
43 fill up with boats and water skis all summer. We wait
for the crisp September wind to 44 celebrate the start
43
of the school year and the chance to reunite with our
A) NO CHANGE
friends.
B) fills up
C) fill it
D) filling

44
Which of the following most effectively concludes the
sentence and reinforces the primary comparison in
the essay?
A) NO CHANGE
B) show us, again, that we don’t need an ocean to
ride the waves.
C) buy new wet suits since they go on sale.
D) drive away the sunbathers and give us back our
surfing terrain.

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 2 2
Questions 45-60 are based on the following passage. 45
A) NO CHANGE
Anna May Wong: From Extra to Star B) Tsong—Anna May Wong,
C) Tsong (Anna May Wong)
[1]
D) Tsong, Anna May Wong
Wong Liu 45 Tsong (Anna May Wong), had longed
to be an actress since 46 she was a child observing film 46
productions in her Los Angeles neighborhood as a child. A) NO CHANGE
Wong entered the film industry as a teenager in the B) her childhood when she first observed
1920s, at a time when few opportunities were available C) first initially observing
D) first observing
to Chinese American actors. Wong, however, was intent
on challenging the 47 industrys’ boundaries by offering
47
memorable performances. That’s exactly what she did.
A) NO CHANGE
[2]
B) industry’s boundaries
Wong progressed quickly from uncredited to credited C) industries boundary’s
actress. [A] Shortly after performing her first supporting D) industries boundaries
role, 48 Wong, at seventeen, starred in The Toll of the
Sea. 49 Around the globe, critics worldwide praised her 48
portrayal of a young 50 woman, whomever rejected in A) NO CHANGE
B) audiences watched the seventeen-year-old’s
performance
C) audiences watched Wong, who was seventeen,
D) Wong at seventeen starred,

49
A) NO CHANGE
B) Both at home and abroad, critics
C) Globally, critics
D) Critics

50
A) NO CHANGE
B) woman, whom
C) woman whose
D) woman

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 2 2
love. Reviewers raved about Wong’s ability to convey 51
emotions such as joy and grief through graceful gestures The writer is considering deleting the underlined
and pantomime 51 —essential components of acting in portion (and ending the sentence with a period).
Should the underlined portion be kept or deleted?
the era of silent film. A) Kept, because it asserts that the acting techniques
[3] Wong employed differed greatly from those of
her contemporaries.
Such attention to detail in 52 their performances B) Kept, because it states why Wong’s skillful use of
landed Wong numerous supporting roles in the 1920s. gestures and pantomime was particularly
important.
Yet, despite having upstaged lead actors and actresses for
C) Deleted, because it indicates that Wong lacked
nearly a decade, Wong was not offered another starring skills beyond the essential components of acting.
role. 53 Aware that Hollywood’s racist casting D) Deleted, because it demonstrates that reviewers
evaluated Wong’s performances harshly.

52
A) NO CHANGE
B) their performances,
C) her performances,
D) her performances

53
At this point, the writer is considering adding the
following true statement:
On February 8, 1960, a terrazzo and brass star
commemorating Anna May Wong’s contributions
to film was added to Hollywood Boulevard’s Walk
of Fame.
Should the writer make this addition here?
A) Yes, because it emphasizes the correlation
between Wong’s early struggles in the 1920s and
her success decades later.
B) Yes, because it supports the paragraph’s main
point that Wong frequently upstaged her peers.
C) No, because it interrupts the paragraph’s
discussion of how Wong’s inability to secure
starring roles led to her leaving for Europe.
D) No, because it contradicts an earlier claim that
Wong had difficulty finding starring roles.

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 2 2
54 practice were limiting, Wong left for Europe in 1928. 54
[4] A) NO CHANGE
B) practices were limiting her success,
[B] Determined to maintain her popularity as the
C) practice were limiting her success,
era of talking pictures evolved, Wong became fluent in D) practices was limiting,
German and French. [C] This helped her land a starring
role in one of her first “talkies,” 55 this film was shot
55
three different times— 56 once in German, once in A) NO CHANGE
French, and once in English. 57 Like B) incorporating sound, the film was
C) the film, starring Wong was
D) a film

56
A) NO CHANGE
B) once each in a litany of three separate languages
that included German, French, and
C) in a list of three languages—German, and also
French, and
D) once in each of three ways—German, French,
and

57
If the writer were to delete the preceding sentence,
the paragraph would primarily lose:
A) a contrast between the ease with which Wong
learned German and French and the difficulty
Wong experienced in shooting a film three times.
B) an example of how Wong’s ability to speak
multiple languages enhanced her opportunities in
a changing film industry.
C) an explanation of how critics responded to
Wong’s ability to speak both German and French.
D) an indication that Wong struggled futilely to
maintain her popularity in the era of sound in
film.

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 2 2
58 Wong performed there, her performances in plays 58
and operettas on the continent and in Great Britain were A) NO CHANGE
lauded by critics. B) her performance in this film,
C) Wong’s performances,
[5]
D) DELETE the underlined portion.
The American film and theater industry took note
of Wong’s success. During Wong’s return to the United
59
States in 1930, a producer 59 intercepted her at a
Given that all the choices are accurate, which one best
stopover in London and hurriedly signed her to act in emphasizes the producer’s eagerness to secure Wong
for a role in On the Spot?
the hit Broadway play On the Spot. A year later, critics
A) NO CHANGE
praised her performance in a popular Hollywood thriller.
B) who also produced other Broadway plays signed
[D] Wong, able to consistently garner critical acclaim, C) casting Edgar Wallace’s play signed
sustained her career as a premier American film star. D) met Wong and asked

Question 60 asks about the preceding passage as a

whole.

60
The writer wants to add the following sentence to the
essay:
There, Wong’s popularity soared.
This sentence would most logically be placed at:
A) Point A in Paragraph 2.
B) Point B in Paragraph 4.
C) Point C in Paragraph 4.
D) Point D in Paragraph 5.

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 2 2
Questions 61-75 are based on the following passage. 61
A) NO CHANGE
Choreographing Stories B) which they
C) that he
[1] Choreographer Jerome Robbins significantly
D) that
affected the development of Broadway with shows such
as On the Town and West Side Story 61 which he helped
62
elevate the status of dance in musical theater. [2] In A) NO CHANGE
variety shows like the Ziegfeld Follies, for example, the B) overshadowed
showgirls’ costumes thoroughly captured the audience’s C) deceived
attention. [3] In the early days of Broadway, dance was D) coated
62 situated by the elaborate costumes. [4] As a result, the
Ziegfeld Girls’ dancing seemed almost incidental. [5] But 63
by the 1930s, Broadway musicals had begun to tell stories A) NO CHANGE
B) From now on,
with greater complexity, while lavish costumes gave way
C) Previously,
to other theatrical elements. [6] Jerome Robbins, along
D) Thus,
with other choreographers, began using dance to tell the
story. [7] 63 However, actors gained a new method of
64
conveying the characters’ emotions. 64
For the sake of the logic and coherence of this
paragraph, Sentence 2 should be placed:
A) where it is now.
B) before Sentence 1.
C) after Sentence 3.
D) after Sentence 4.

65
A) NO CHANGE
B) choreographed, On the Town (1944),
C) choreographed; On the Town (1944)
D) choreographed On the Town (1944),

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 2 2
The first Broadway musical Robbins 66
65 choreographed, On the Town, (1944), depicted A) NO CHANGE
three sailors on leave in New York. 66 Despite the fact B) At the time,
C) Although
that dramatic scenes in musical theater were usually
D) Just as
interrupted in order to feature dancers. Robbins, by
contrast, arranged for the 67 actors, himself to perform
67
the dances. His choreography allowed the actors to
A) NO CHANGE
express 68 the sailors’ joy for freedom while continuing
B) actors, themselves
the storyline of the show. 69 70 Offering authentic C) actors themselves
emotions to which the audience could relate, conveyed D) actors himself
through the medium of dance.
68
A) NO CHANGE
B) one’s
C) our
D) his

69
If the writer were to delete the preceding sentence,
the paragraph would primarily lose a statement that:
A) suggests that the performers were excited about
developing their skills in both dancing and
acting.
B) illustrates how Robbins attempted to use
choreography in a new way in On the Town.
C) explains that expressing emotion was originally
considered a key element in On the Town.
D) provides evidence that Robbins trained dancers
to act out complicated stories.

70
A) NO CHANGE
B) The performance of
C) Here were
D) This was

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 2 2
But it was Robbins’s choreography in the 1957 musical 71
West Side Story—a retelling of Romeo and Juliet with A) NO CHANGE
two New York street gangs in place of Shakespeare’s rival B) more dramatically intertwining.
C) most dramatic, as intertwined.
families—in which the story and dancing were 71 most
D) more dramatics intertwined.
dramatically intertwined. From the gang members’ vying
for control of the streets to the courtship of the ill-fated
72
young 72 lovers: Robbins melded modern jazz dance
A) NO CHANGE
with classical ballet to convey the tragic tale.
B) lovers, so
C) lovers,
D) lovers.

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 2 2
73 Nowadays dance—like songs and dialogue—plays 73
74 a role integrating in musical theater today. Where the A) NO CHANGE
spectacle of lavish variety shows had once relegated dance B) These days, dance—
C) Presently dance—
to a minor role, 75 Robbins has won numerous awards,
D) Dance—
including an Oscar for West Side Story.

74
A) NO CHANGE
B) an integration role
C) an integrity role
D) an integral role

75
Given that all the choices are accurate, which one
most effectively concludes the sentence and the essay?
A) NO CHANGE
B) Robbins helped dance reach its present status in
Broadway musicals through his innovative
choreography.
C) Robbins has played minor parts as a dancer in the
chorus as well as leading parts in classical ballets.
D) about ten million tickets to Broadway musicals
are now sold each year.

STOP
If you finish before time is called, you may check your work on this section only.
Do not turn to any other section.

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