Writing Rhetorically: Framing First Year

Writing
WRITING RHETORICALLY: FRAMING FIRST
YEAR WRITING

Framing First-Year Writing

KIRK FONTENOT; SHELLY RODRIGUE; WANDA M. WALLER; AND

WILL ROGERS

LOUIS: The Louisiana Library Network

Writing Rhetorically: Framing First Year Writing Copyright © 2022 by LOUIS: The Louisiana Library Network is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License, except where otherwise noted.

This textbook has been heavily adapted from material taken from English Composition I: Rhetorical Methods-Based, an
OER developed and authored by Lumen Learning. Each chapter’s author has edited and created new content using Lumen
Learning’s text as its primary source material, except where otherwise indicated. Where applicable, other source materials
have been noted at the chapter level.
CONTENTS

About This Book xi

Introduction 1
Adaptation Statement 3

Course Contents and Syllabus

Course Contents at a Glance 7

English Composition I Syllabus and Course Policies 10

Major Writing Assignments, Student Worksheets, and Rubrics

Rubric: Discussion Questions and Your Turn Exercises 19

Assignment: Narrative and Description 20
Student Worksheet: Narrative and Description 26
Assignment: Definition and Exemplification 28
Student Worksheet: Definition and Exemplification 34
Assignment: Compare and Evaluate 36
Student Worksheet: Compare and Evaluate 39
Assignment: Cause-Effect and Argument 41
Student Worksheet: Cause-Effect and Argument 44
Chapter 1: Invention

Invention 49
Kirk Fontenot

Chapter 2: Arrangement

Arrangement 57
Wanda M. Waller

Chapter 3: Drafting and Revising

Drafting and Revising 65

Will Rogers

Chapter 4: Editing and Proofreading

Editing and Proofreading 75

Shelly Rodrigue

Chapter 5: Narrative

Narrative 83
Shelly Rodrigue
Chapter 6: Description

Description 95
Shelly Rodrigue

Chapter 7: Definition

Definition 105
Kirk Fontenot
Video: Thesis Explained 120
Effective Thesis Statements 121

Chapter 8: Illustration/Example

Illustration/Example 127
Kirk Fontenot

Chapter 9: Compare/Contrast

Compare/Contrast 145
Will Rogers

Chapter 10: Evaluation

Evaluation 161
Will Rogers
Chapter 11: Cause and Effect

Cause and Effect 177

Wanda M. Waller

Chapter 12: Argument

Argument 191
Wanda M. Waller

Chapter 13: MLA Research and Citation

MLA Research and Citation 205

Kirk Fontenot

Chapter 14: Grammar and Mechanics Mini-Lessons

Grammar and Mechanics Mini-Lessons 219

Mini-Lesson: Subjects and Verbs, Irregular Verbs, Subject-Verb Agreement 220
Mini-Lesson: Sentence Types 221
Mini-Lesson: Fragments I 222
Mini-Lesson: Run-ons and Comma Splices I 223
Mini-Lesson: Comma Usage 225
Mini-Lesson: Parallelism 226
Mini-Lesson: The Apostrophe 227
Mini-Lesson: Capital Letters 228
Grammar Practice: Interactive Quizzes 229
De Copia: Demonstration of the Variety of Language 230
Style Exercise: Voice 232
Appendix A: Checklist for Accessibility 233
Glossary 236
 ABOUT THIS BOOK | XI

ABOUT THIS BOOK

This writing course is built around four major writing assignments in order to introduce students to some of
the basic writing skills necessary for success in college. Each paper asks students to focus on two different but
complementary rhetorical modes of writing. Another way to say this is that this book helps students master a
set of standard moves that are vital to critical inquiry at the college level. As you begin your college careers, you
will need to develop and become fluent in certain essential intellectual tasks that are central to sophisticated
inquiry into complex questions. Perhaps more than any other introductory course you take, this class will help
you no matter what your major is because it teaches you the building blocks of academic writing. Equally
important, it gives you a chance to get some practice with using those building blocks. As you move through
your undergraduate classes, you will continue to use these and other building blocks or tools to meet the
intellectual challenges that you will encounter as part of your curriculum.
The first paper asks you to pay attention to the descriptive language you choose to communicate in one
of the most basic structures of human thought: narrative. From there, the second paper asks you to think
about a more focused task in which you explain a complex term or concept and support your explanation with
illustrations or examples. Both papers give you experience thinking about sequence, language, and abstract
ideas. In addition to this, they prepare you to execute more complex tasks, tasks that highlight the challenging
practice of analysis, or breaking things into parts and finding different relationships between those parts.
In the evaluate and compare paper, you will identify criteria (individual traits) that you’ll use to assess two
different things and determine the relative merits and weaknesses of each. Not only is this a skill you’ll need for
college, but it’s one you’ll need for the rest of your life. (How else will you be able to decide which smartphone
is best for you?)
Your final paper asks you to describe and make an argument about a cause-and-effect relationship that you
see somewhere in the world. Another project that asks you to undertake at least two complex intellectual tasks,
this paper incorporates pieces of all the papers in the class that have led up to it. Not only does this final
assignment ask you to think abstractly about concrete things; it asks you to learn new analytical maneuvers and
practice others that you developed earlier in the semester.
In addition to chapters on each of these eight different rhetorical modes, this textbook also includes four
chapters that will coach you through the writing process as something that doesn’t just happen overnight.
(Well, it’s not supposed to happen overnight, at least.) As you work on each major paper, you will have a chance
to think about each of the different stages of the writing process. By thinking about writing as a process with
clearly defined stages and concrete goals for each stage, you’ll develop a chronological understanding of how to
write a paper by following a set of predetermined steps. This is faster and more efficient than muddling through
a chaotic, unfocused wandering on your way to a final draft. Once you get practice at working through each
XII | ABOUT THIS BOOK

step of the process, the task of writing a paper will become an easy task to plan and undertake from start to
finish.
As you complete both minor and major writing assignments, be sure to consult the rubrics included in this
textbook, particularly those included with the assignment sheet for each major paper. Key to understanding
any assignment is knowing how it will be scored or evaluated. And, finally, don’t hesitate to contact your
professor if you have any questions or concerns. They’re not psychic, and if you’re struggling, it never hurts to
let them know what’s going on.
Good luck and happy writing!
 INTRODUCTION | 1

The Creation of This Book

This textbook was created as part of the Interactive OER for Dual Enrollment project, facilitated by LOUIS:
The Louisiana Library Network and funded by a $2 million Open Textbooks Pilot Program grant from the
Department of Education.
This project supports the extension of access to high-quality post-secondary opportunities to high school
students across Louisiana and beyond by creating materials that can be adopted for dual enrollment
environments. Dual enrollment is the opportunity for a student to be enrolled in high school and college at the
same time.
The cohort-developed OER course materials are released under a license that permits their free use, reuse,
modification and sharing with others. This includes a corresponding course available
in MoodleNet and Canvas Commons that can be imported to other Learning Management System platforms.
For access/questions, contact Affordable Learning Louisiana.
If you are adopting this textbook, we would be glad to know of your use via this brief survey.

Review Statement
This textbook and its accompanying course materials went through at least two review processes:

• Peer reviewers, coordinated by Jared Eusea, River Parish Community College, used an online course
development standard rubric for assessing the quality and content of each course to ensure that the
courses developed through Interactive OER for Dual Enrollment support online learners in that
environment. The evaluation framework reflects a commitment to accessibility and usability for all
learners.
◦ Reviewers
▪ Jesse Walczak
▪ Emily Aucoin
▪ Begona Perez-Mira
• The Institute for the Study of Knowledge Management in Education (ISKME) collaborated with
LOUIS to review course materials and ensure their appropriateness for dual enrollment audiences.
Review criteria were drawn from factors that apply across dual enrollment courses and subject areas,
such as determining appropriate reading levels; assessing the fit of topics and examples for high school
DE students; applying high-level principles for quality curriculum design, including designing for
2 | INTRODUCTION

accessibility, appropriate student knowledge checks, and effective scaffolding of student tasks and prior
knowledge requirements; and addressing adaptability, open educational practices, and principles related
to inclusion and representational social justice.
◦ Reviewers
▪ Danielle R Potier
▪ Sheri Sison
 ADAPTATION STATEMENT | 3

ADAPTATION STATEMENT

This textbook was adapted and remixed from Lumen Learning’s OER English I Composition: Rhetorical-
Methods Based, except where otherwise noted in the supplementary chapter adaptation statement at the end
of chapters where this is applicable. This remix (Writing Rhetorically: Framing First Year Writing) of the
original Lumen Learning textbook is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International
License. Kirk Fontenot, Shelly Rodrigue, William Rogers, and Wanda Waller are listed as the authors of
this adaptation. Original chapters included in the textbook are those on arrangement and argument (Wanda
Waller) and proofreading & editing (Shelly Rodrigure). With the exception of the chapters on invention,
drafting & revising, and evaluation (see additional chapter sources notes at the end of each chapter), all other
chapters in the book are a blend of the original text in English I Composition: Rhetorical-Methods Based and
significant new, original writing by the authors. Each chapter’s list of Student Learning Outcomes is new,
original content, as well as all assignment sheets, student worksheets, rubrics, and H5P.
4 | ADAPTATION STATEMENT
 COURSE CONTENTS AND SYLLABUS | 5

COURSE CONTENTS AND

SYLLABUS
6 | COURSE CONTENTS AND SYLLABUS
 COURSE CONTENTS AT A GLANCE | 7

COURSE CONTENTS AT A GLANCE

8 | COURSE CONTENTS AT A GLANCE

Module 1: Invention

Module 2: Arrangement

Module 3: Drafting and Revising

Module 4: Editing and Proofreading

Module 5: Narrative

Module 6: Description

Module 7: Definition

Module 8: Illustration/Example

Module 9: Compare/Contrast

Module 10: Evaluation

Module 11: Cause and Effect

Module 12: Argument

Module 13: MLA Research and Citation

Module 14: Grammar and Mechanics Mini-Lessons

• Grammar and Mechanics Mini-Lessons
• Mini-Lesson: Subjects and Verbs, Irregular Verbs, Subject-Verb Agreement
• Mini-Lesson: Sentence Types
 COURSE CONTENTS AT A GLANCE | 9

• Mini-Lesson: Fragments I
• Mini-Lesson: Run-Ons and Comma Splices I
• Mini-Lesson: Comma Usage
• Mini-Lesson: Parallelism
• Mini-Lesson: The Apostrophe
• Mini-Lesson: Capital Letters

Writing Rhetorically: Framing First Year Writing Copyright © 2022 by LOUIS: The Louisiana Library Network is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License, except where otherwise noted.
10 | ENGLISH COMPOSITION I SYLLABUS AND COURSE POLICIES

ENGLISH COMPOSITION I SYLLABUS AND

COURSE POLICIES

Except where otherwise noted, Writing Rhetorically: Framing First Year Writing is
licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License by Kirk Fontenot, Shelly Rodrigue,
William Rogers, and Wanda Waller.

Course Number and Title:

CENL 1013: English Composition I

Course Brief Description:

Introduces students to the critical thinking, reading, writing, and rhetorical skills required in the college/
university and beyond, including citation and documentation, writing as a process, audience awareness, and
writing effective essays. Four major writing assignments focus on developing mastery of a variety of rhetorical
methods (narrative, description, definition, exemplification, comparison/contrast, evaluation, cause and effect,
and argumentation). 3 credit hours.

Prerequisite Knowledge:
Students should be comfortable with writing complex sentences and paragraphs as part of a longer, multipage
composition. They should have a strong grasp of spelling and basic grammatical rules. Students will also need
to be comfortable with reading, analyzing, and discussing others’ writing. Experience with conducting research
and integrating and documenting external sources is not necessary.

Course Goals:
There are six student learning objectives (SLOs) for this course.
SLO 1: Writing as a process
 ENGLISH COMPOSITION I SYLLABUS AND COURSE POLICIES | 11

Students will adopt a multi-step, recursive writing process that includes prewriting, drafting,
revising, editing, and proofreading.
SLO 2: Purpose, audience, voice, tone, and style
Students will apply appropriate language and tone for an intended audience and rhetorical
situation.
SLO 3: Organization, structure, and format of essay
Students will write academic essays in logically sequenced paragraphs including an introduction,
supportive body, and conclusion.
SLO 4: Persuasion, rhetorical tactics/situation, thesis development
Students will use persuasive strategies and rhetorical patterns in written original arguments.
SLO 5: Handling and gathering evidence/support
Students will demonstrate effective support of assertions with rhetorically appropriate strategies to
evaluate, represent, and respond to the ideas and research of others.
SLO 6: Grammar
Students will apply rules and conventions of grammar, word choice, punctuation, and spelling in a
variety of sentence structures.

Course Materials:
Course Moodle site
Writing Rhetorically: Framing First-Year Writing textbook; adaptation by Kirk Fontenot, Shelly Rodrigue,
Will Rogers, and Wanda Waller

Instructor Contact Information:

Instructor Name:

• Email:
• Phone:
• Office:
• Office Hours:
• Communication Policy: Instructor will reply to emails within 24 hours or, if on a weekend, by the end
of the next business day. Holidays and university breaks may impact response times.
12 | ENGLISH COMPOSITION I SYLLABUS AND COURSE POLICIES

Course Schedule:

Module Topics and Concepts Corresponding Course Materials

Complete:
1 Introductions and writing diagnostic
Writing Diagnostic (in class)

Read: Chapter 5 in textbook

Narration
Complete (in textbook):
Point of view
Discussion Questions – Professional
Transitional words Example
2
Narrative examples Discussion Questions – Student Example

Paper 1: Personal Narrative Essay Assignment Sheet and Your Turn Exercise
Worksheet
Submit all 3 responses to Moodle in 1 doc

Read: Chapter 6 in textbook

Complete:
Description
Discussion Questions – Professional
Example
Objective vs. subjective
Discussion Questions – Student Example
3 Organization
Your Turn Exercise
Connotations vs. denotations
Submit all 3 responses to Moodle in 1 doc
Description examples
Rough draft of paper 1 DUE end of
week

How to begin the writing process

Read: Chapter 1 in textbook
Methods of prewriting
4
Complete: Apply Your Turn exercise to
Specific details vs. general ideas
your rough draft
Moving from prewriting to drafting

Final draft of paper 1 DUE beg. of

Writing definitions
week
5 Denotation and connotation
Read: Chapter 7 in textbook
Elements and structure of the definition essay
Complete:
 ENGLISH COMPOSITION I SYLLABUS AND COURSE POLICIES | 13

Module Topics and Concepts Corresponding Course Materials

Discussion Questions – Professional

Example

Paper 2: Definition and Example Essay Assignment and Discussion Questions – Student Example
Worksheet
Your Turn Exercise

Submit all 3 responses to Moodle in 1 doc

Read: Chapter 8 in textbook

Complete:

Discussion Questions – Professional

Writing illustrations and examples Example

6 Specific details vs. general statements Discussion Questions – Student Example

Transitional phrases and phrases of illustration Your Turn Exercise

Submit all 3 responses to Moodle in 1 doc

Rough draft of paper 2 DUE end of

week

Arrangement
Read: Chapter 2 in textbook
Understanding parts of essays
7
Complete: Apply Your Turn exercise to
Techniques of introductions, body paragraphs, and your rough draft
conclusions

Final draft of paper 2 DUE beg. of

week

Read: Chapter 9 in textbook

Evaluation
Complete:
Discussion of opinions and review judgment/thesis
8 Discussion Questions – Professional
Criteria for review
Example
Paper 3: Compare and Evaluate Essay Assignment and
Discussion Questions – Student Example
Worksheet
Your Turn Exercise

Submit all 3 responses to Moodle in 1 doc

14 | ENGLISH COMPOSITION I SYLLABUS AND COURSE POLICIES

Module Topics and Concepts Corresponding Course Materials

Read: Chapter 10 in textbook

Complete:
Compare and contrast
Discussion Questions – Professional
Purpose of compare and contrast
Example
9
Discussion of similarities/differences
Discussion Questions – Student Example
Structure of compare-and-contrast essays
Your Turn Exercise

Submit all 3 responses to Moodle in 1 doc

Read: Chapter 3 in textbook

Different drafting methods
Complete: 75-minute draft activity;
What kind of writer are you?
10 reverse outline
Revision methods (reverse outline, read aloud, peer review
Rough draft of paper 3 DUE end of
and response)
week

11 Open Week (fall/spring break or other discretionary activities)

Final draft of paper 3 DUE beg. of

week

Read: Chapter 11 in textbook

Complete:
Structure of a cause-and-effect essay
12 Discussion Questions – Professional
Paper 4: Cause/Effect and Argument Essay Assignment Sheet
Example
and Student Worksheet
Discussion Questions – Student Example

Your Turn Exercise

Submit all 3 responses to Moodle in 1 doc

Read: Chapter 12 in textbook

Complete:
13 Structure of the argument essay
Discussion Questions – Professional
Example

Discussion Questions – Student Example

 ENGLISH COMPOSITION I SYLLABUS AND COURSE POLICIES | 15

Module Topics and Concepts Corresponding Course Materials

Your Turn Exercise

Submit all 3 responses to Moodle in 1 doc

Rough draft of paper 4 DUE end of

week

Revising English 101 essays

Content editing
Read: Chapter 4 in textbook
14 Line editing Complete: Apply Your Turn exercise to
your rough draft
Copy editing

Proofreading

Final draft of paper 4 DUE end of

15 Final Week – Open for peer review, catchup, etc.
semester

Course Policies:
Technology Requirements

• Students must have access to a computer that can connect reliably to broadband internet, as well as the
ability to navigate the school’s LMS (Learning Management System). For synchronous online courses,
students must have web cameras, microphones, Zoom, and a reliable high-speed internet connection.
Chrome, Firefox, and Safari are recommended web browsers to use for accessing the school’s LMS and
submitting materials online.

Computer Skills

• Students must have at least basic proficiency in word processing applications (MS Word, Google Docs,
etc.) and be able to submit files to an online system. Word processing files should be saved with the .docx
extension.
• Regardless of the course’s modality (online or f2f), students must be prepared to check the LMS and
receive announcement emails on a daily basis during the week in order to keep up with the class.

Evaluation
16 | ENGLISH COMPOSITION I SYLLABUS AND COURSE POLICIES

• Discussion questions and Your Turn activities provide low-stakes formative assessments for students.
• H5P exercises are for self-evaluation to check comprehension only and are not graded.
• Four major papers, each with a preliminary rough draft due at least a week before the final draft, will
provide high-stakes, summative assessments for students.
◦ Instructors will provide feedback for rough drafts of major papers prior to the weekend before the
paper is due.

Grading Policy
The students’ grades for the course will be made up of their scores on discussion questions and Your Turn
activities, four major writing assignments, and attendance.
Paper 1 = 20%
Paper 2 = 20%
Paper 3 = 20%
Paper 4 = 20%
Discussion questions and YT exercises = 15%
Attendance = 5%

• [Grading scale and late work policy, if applicable.]

University Policies and Support:

• Code of Conduct
• Online Etiquette
• Academic Integrity
• Diversity Statement
• Accessibility and Disability Services
• Technology Support
• Academic Support Services
 MAJOR WRITING ASSIGNMENTS, STUDENT WORKSHEETS, AND RUBRICS | 17

MAJOR WRITING ASSIGNMENTS,

STUDENT WORKSHEETS, AND
RUBRICS
18 | MAJOR WRITING ASSIGNMENTS, STUDENT WORKSHEETS, AND RUBRICS
 RUBRIC: DISCUSSION QUESTIONS AND YOUR TURN EXERCISES | 19

RUBRIC: DISCUSSION QUESTIONS AND

YOUR TURN EXERCISES

Rubric: Discussion Questions and Your Turn Exercises

Instructors: Use this rubric to score Discussion Questions and Your Turn responses found in this textbook.
Students: Refer to this rubric as you complete Discussion Questions and Your Turn responses to be sure
you understand how your work will be evaluated and scored.

Needs
Category Unacceptable Satisfactory Good Exceptional
Improvement

Your turn
exercises and
Your turn exercises
Key points are not discussion Your turn
and discussion
Your turn/ clear. Question questions are exercises and
questions are
discussion not adequately not discussion
comprehensive,
questions are answered. Your comprehensive questions are
Content accurate, and
very turn/discussion or completely accurate and
complete. Key ideas
incomplete or questions are stated. complete. Key
are clearly stated,
not attempted vague or Key points are points are stated
explained, and
incomplete. addressed but and supported.
well supported.
not well
supported.

Inadequate
organization
or Well organized,
Organization and Organization is
Did not development. coherently
Organization structure detract mostly clear and
attempt Structure of developed, and easy
from the answer. easy to follow.
the answer is to follow.
not easy to
follow.

Displays three Displays one to

Displays over five to five errors three errors in Displays no errors in
errors in spelling, in spelling, spelling, spelling,
Writing Did not
punctuation, punctuation, punctuation, punctuation,
Fundamentals attempt
grammar, and grammar, and grammar, and grammar, and
sentence structure. sentence sentence sentence structure.
structure. structure.
20 | ASSIGNMENT: NARRATIVE AND DESCRIPTION

ASSIGNMENT: NARRATIVE AND

DESCRIPTION

Narrative and Description Essay

Length: 2-4 pages of typed, double-spaced text
Due date: First quarter

Student Learning Objectives (SLOs)

• Compose a personal narrative essay (SLO 2)
• Communicate a clear story using narrative and descriptive techniques (SLO 3)
• Apply MLA format to prose free of grammar and spelling errors (SLO 7)

Description of assignment:

Write a personal narrative essay on one of the approved topics below (SLO 2). The essay must tell a clear
story about a real experience. Use narration and description in the essay (SLO 3). Your tone should be
conversational; tell the story as if you were telling it to a close friend. The essay must be in MLA format with
double spacing and Times New Roman 12-point font. The length of the essay should be between 2 and 4 full
pages of text. Your essay should be free of grammar and spelling errors (SLO 7).

Goal of assignment:

Tell an engaging true story that has a clear purpose (thesis) and a believable narrator.

Skills we will work on with this paper:

• narration
• description
• dialogue (if needed)
• chronological organization
 ASSIGNMENT: NARRATIVE AND DESCRIPTION | 21

Suggestions for topics:

• a story from your childhood

• a significant accomplishment or overcoming a challenge
• a time when you experienced something new/for the first time
• a memory with the most influential/important person in your life
• a funny story that happened to you
• a time when you participated in an extracurricular activity/hobby
• a memorable vacation/event with family or friends
• a story about the most memorable gift you ever received
• a holiday and how you celebrate it
• a time you were greatly inspired
• a moment when you discovered one of your favorite things
• for all other topics, get instructor approval

Rubric [with percentage breakdown for different aspects of

evaluation/grade (%)]:

Content = 30%

A: 30-27 points

• Paper is creative and original

• Student has clearly followed and met the assignment guidelines

B: 26-23 points

• Paper is somewhat creative and original

• Student has mostly followed and met the assignment guidelines

C: 22-19 points

• Paper is unoriginal and ideas are obvious or general

• Student has followed and met basic assignment guidelines

D: 18-15 points

• Paper is unoriginal and ideas are obvious or general

22 | ASSIGNMENT: NARRATIVE AND DESCRIPTION

• Student has not followed and met the basic assignment guidelines

F: 14-0 points

• Paper contains few complete ideas

• Student has not followed and met most of the basic assignment guidelines

Development = 30%

A: 30-27 points

• Tone enhances the subject, conveys the writer’s attitude, and suits the audience

B: 26-23 points

• Tone mostly fits the subject, the writer’s attitude is somewhat clear, and the tone is mostly suitable for
the audience

C: 22-19 points

• Tone is acceptable for the subject, the writer’s attitude is not clear or consistent, and the tone may or
may not be suitable for the audience

D: 18-15 points

• Tone is not consistent with the subject, the writer’s attitude is indeterminate, and the tone is not
appropriate for the audience

F: 14-0 points

• Tone is not clear at all or does not make sense for the subject, the writer’s attitude is indeterminate, and
the tone risks disengaging the audience

Structure = 20%

A: 20-18 points

• Essay has a logical order and a clear sense of flow

 ASSIGNMENT: NARRATIVE AND DESCRIPTION | 23

• Introduction is engaging, paragraphs are idea-centered, and transitions are smooth

B: 17-16 points

• Essay has a somewhat logical order and some sense of flow

• Introduction is mostly engaging, paragraphs mostly adhere to their topics, and transitions are
identifiable

C: 15-14 points

• Essay does not have a logical order, though some order is obvious
• Introduction offers little insight, paragraphs stray off topic, and transitions can sometimes be evident

D: 13-11 points

• Essay structure seems random or chaotic, paragraphs lack development, and transitions are missing or
misleading

F: 10-0 points

• Essay does not have any clear structure, paragraphs are not developed, and transitions are missing or
misleading

Format = 10%

A: 10-9 points

• Proper MLA format is evident

B: 8-7 points

• Paper is mostly formatted correctly but may contain minor errors

C: 6-5 points

• Text contains more than 3 kinds of formatting errors

D: 4-3 points
24 | ASSIGNMENT: NARRATIVE AND DESCRIPTION

• Formatting is problematic and has several major errors

F: 2-0 points

• Formatting does not follow assignment guidelines

Grammar = 10%

A: 10-9 points

• Paper has been carefully edited and contains only minor grammatical and/or spelling errors

B: 8-7 points

• Paper has been edited but may contain 4-7 errors

C: 6-5 points

• Careless proofreading is evident

• Text contains between 8 and 15 errors

D: 4-3 points

• Little evidence of proofreading

• Text contains between 16 and 30 errors

F: 2-0

• No evidence of proofreading
• Text has more than 30 errors

Possibilities (the best essays do this):

Personal narratives based on the author’s experience are usually written in the first person using the “I”
pronoun. Personal narratives based on others’ experiences are usually written in the third person using “he,”
“she,” or “they” pronouns. Personal narratives are usually written in the past tense, but they can be written
in the present tense. Successful narratives are often written in chronological order with a beginning, a middle,
 ASSIGNMENT: NARRATIVE AND DESCRIPTION | 25

and an end. This helps readers develop a sense of time in the story. Many writers use dialogue to show how the
narrator and other characters are feeling about the events that are unfolding.
Some stories are told by focusing on scene. This means the author will provide details as vividly and precisely
as if he or she is there (imagine if the story is a movie and the reader is watching). Other stories might be told
by focusing on summary. This means the author will tell the essentials of what happened rather than providing
great details about people and their surroundings. Either technique can be used to write a compelling narrative.
Writers should begin by selecting a topic and answering the 5 Ws and the H about the topic: What
happened? Who took part? When? Where? Why did it happen? How did it happen? The answers to these
questions will provide the building blocks for the personal narrative.

Pitfalls (common mistakes students make with this assignment):

• Do not use clinical language. Be clear but be yourself.

• Avoid the second-person point of view.
• Do not switch back and forth between present and past tense.
• Make sure your narrator seems reliable.
• Make sure the tone fits the subject and aligns with the narrator’s views.
• Carefully proofread your essay before turning it in. Make sure to address any errors identified by your
text editors.

Writing Rhetorically: Framing First Year Writing Copyright © 2022 by LOUIS: The Louisiana Library Network is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License, except where otherwise noted.
26 | STUDENT WORKSHEET: NARRATIVE AND DESCRIPTION

STUDENT WORKSHEET: NARRATIVE AND

DESCRIPTION

Student Worksheet for Narrative and Description Essay

Narrative and Description Essay

Length requirement: TBD (2-4 pages recommended)

Point of view (first person or third person): First person
Due date:

Rhetorical mode and chosen topic:

Narration and description

Research requirements:

None

Thinking ahead:

Essay’s main idea and thesis statement:

Tell about a factual remembered event

Basic necessary elements in paper:

• Introduction
• Several body paragraphs
• Conclusion
• Descriptive details
• MLA format
 STUDENT WORKSHEET: NARRATIVE AND DESCRIPTION | 27

Questions to ask about the paper (list your questions):

28 | ASSIGNMENT: DEFINITION AND EXEMPLIFICATION

ASSIGNMENT: DEFINITION AND

EXEMPLIFICATION

Definition and Example Essay

Length: 2 pages (non-researched) OR 3 pages plus Works Cited (researched)
Due date:

Student Learning Objectives (SLOs)

• Compose a definition and example essay (SLO 2)
• Organize the definition and example essay using a structure appropriate to the rhetorical modes (SLO 3)
• Apply MLA format to prose free of grammar and spelling errors (SLO 6)
• If choosing the research option, students will also evaluate, represent, and respond to the ideas and
research of others while documenting sources (SLO 5)

Description of assignment:

Choose one of the terms below to define in a definition/example essay. This is not an argument essay, so you are
not arguing for or against anything. The idea is also not to write a technical article; instead, use denotation and
connotation together to define a term in such a way that your audience can easily understand. Your definition
should include a basic definition as well as an extended definition, which may use specific examples, history,
etymology, compare/contrast, and more.
As you plan your essay, consider these questions: Why is it important to understand this term? Why is this
term in the news right now? Why is it relevant to someone living in Louisiana? If a friend asked me what this
term meant, how would I explain it?
In order to answer these questions to define your term, you should use specific, relevant examples. Each
example should further your reader’s understanding of your term.
The essay must be in MLA format with double spacing and Times New Roman 12-point font. The length
of the essay should be between 2 and 4 full pages of text. Your essay should be free of grammar and spelling
errors.
 ASSIGNMENT: DEFINITION AND EXEMPLIFICATION | 29

Goal of assignment:

Define a term by providing a basic definition, an extended definition, and relevant specific examples.

Skills we will work on with this paper:

• definition
• examples/illustration
• research using scholarly sources (if writing the research option)
• MLA in-text citation
• Works Cited page
• emphatic-order organization (“save the best for last”)

Suggestions for topics:

Non-researched

• Lagniappe
• Laissez les bons temps rouler

Researched

• Gerrymandering
• Gentrification
• Cultural Appropriation

Rubric [with percentage breakdown for different aspects of

evaluation/grade (%)]:

Content = 30%

A: 30-27 points

• Paper is creative and original

• Student has clearly followed and met the assignment guidelines

B: 26-23 points
30 | ASSIGNMENT: DEFINITION AND EXEMPLIFICATION

• Paper is somewhat creative and original

• Student has mostly followed and met the assignment guidelines

C: 22-19 points

• Paper is unoriginal and ideas are obvious or general

• Student has followed and met basic assignment guidelines

D: 18-15 points

• Paper is unoriginal and ideas are obvious or general

• Student has not followed and met the basic assignment guidelines

F: 14-0 points

• Paper contains few complete ideas

• Student has not followed and met most of the basic assignment guidelines

Development = 30%

A: 30-27 points

• Tone enhances the subject, conveys the writer’s attitude, and suits the audience

B: 26-23 points

• Tone mostly fits the subject, the writer’s attitude is somewhat clear, and the tone is mostly suitable for
the audience

C: 22-19 points

• Tone is acceptable for the subject, the writer’s attitude is not clear or consistent, and the tone may or
may not be suitable for the audience

D: 18-15 points

• Tone is not consistent with the subject, the writer’s attitude is indeterminate, and the tone is not
appropriate for the audience
 ASSIGNMENT: DEFINITION AND EXEMPLIFICATION | 31

F: 14-0 points

• Tone is not clear at all or does not make sense for the subject, the writer’s attitude is indeterminate, and
the tone risks disengaging the audience.

Structure = 20%

A: 20-18 points

• Essay has a logical order and a clear sense of flow

• Introduction is engaging, paragraphs are idea-centered, and transitions are smooth

B: 17-16 points

• Essay has a somewhat logical order and some sense of flow

• Introduction is mostly engaging, paragraphs mostly adhere to their topics, and transitions are
identifiable

C: 15-14 points

• Essay does not have a logical order, though some order is obvious
• Introduction offers little insight, paragraphs stray off topic, and transitions can sometimes be evident

D: 13-11 points

• Essay structure seems random or chaotic, paragraphs lack development, and transitions are missing or
misleading

F: 10-0 points

• Essay does not have any clear structure, paragraphs are not developed, transitions are missing or
misleading

Format = 10%

A: 10-9 points

• Proper MLA format is evident

32 | ASSIGNMENT: DEFINITION AND EXEMPLIFICATION

B: 8-7 points

• Paper is mostly formatted correctly but may contain minor errors

C: 6-5 points

• Text contains more than 3 kinds of formatting errors

D: 4-3 points

• Formatting is problematic and has several major errors

F: 2-0 points

• Formatting does not follow assignment guidelines

Grammar = 10%

A: 10-9 points

• Paper has been carefully edited and contains only minor grammatical and/or spelling errors

B: 8-7 points

• Paper has been edited but may contain 4-7 errors

C: 6-5 points

• Careless proofreading is evident

• Text contains between 8 and 15 errors

D: 4-3 points

• Little evidence of proofreading

• Text contains between 16 and 30 errors

F: 2-0
 ASSIGNMENT: DEFINITION AND EXEMPLIFICATION | 33

• No evidence of proofreading
• Text has more than 30 errors

Possibilities (the best essays do this):

• Write an interesting essay; don’t focus on technical information that no one would want to read!
• Include specific, interesting examples from your own personal experience.
• Start each body paragraph with a clear topic sentence, and keep that paragraph focused on just one main
idea.

Non-research option: Choose specific, interesting examples that you read about.
Research option: Read first. Become a mini-expert on your topic before you begin drafting.

Pitfalls (common mistakes students make with this assignment):

• Do not use clinical language. Be clear but be yourself.

• Avoid the second-person point of view.
• Do not switch back and forth between present and past tense.
• Make sure the tone fits the subject.
• Carefully proofread your essay before turning it in.

Research option: Your essay will include a lot of in-text citations; if it doesn’t, you’re doing it wrong! Remember
that everything that is not common knowledge MUST include an in-text citation, even if it’s in your own
words.

Writing Rhetorically: Framing First Year Writing Copyright © 2022 by LOUIS: The Louisiana Library Network is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License, except where otherwise noted.
34 | STUDENT WORKSHEET: DEFINITION AND EXEMPLIFICATION

STUDENT WORKSHEET: DEFINITION AND

EXEMPLIFICATION

Student Worksheet for Definition and Example Essay

Definition and Example Essay

Length requirement: 2 pages (non-researched) OR 3 pages plus Works Cited (researched)

Point of view (first person or third person): First person (non-researched) or third person (researched)
Due date:

Rhetorical mode and chosen topic:

This essay will incorporate both definition writing and illustration/example writing. In short, your
introduction paragraph will define your term, and the body paragraphs will describe specific examples. Each
body paragraph should focus on one example. You should include three of the following: (a) a well-known
example, (b) a hypothetical example, (c) an example from national news, (d) an example from local news, or (e)
an example particular to Louisiana.

Choose from the following topics:

Non-researched

1. Lagniappe
2. Laissez les bons temps rouler

Researched

1. Gerrymandering
2. Gentrification
3. Cultural Appropriation
 STUDENT WORKSHEET: DEFINITION AND EXEMPLIFICATION | 35

Research requirements:

1. For non-researched topics, draw upon personal experience or class discussions. Do not conduct a web
search. No citation required.
2. For researched topics, you may use sources provided by the instructor. As you conduct your own
research, you should use the library’s online databases, NOT Google or the open web. No assumptions
or first-hand knowledge should be included. Use signal phrases, direct quotes, paraphrasing, and in-text
citations throughout the essay. Include a Works Cited page as the last page.

Thinking ahead:

Essay’s main idea and thesis statement:

Make a point about your chosen term while emphasizing its meaning. Choose specific examples most relevant
to your audience.

Basic necessary elements in paper:

Formatting/style, paragraph organization, presence of thesis, elements specific to rhetorical mode

• MLA format
• Introduction paragraph: 6-10 sentences to introduce topic, then thesis statement, preview supporting
ideas
• Minimum three focused body paragraphs
• Short conclusion paragraph
• Signal phrases and in-text citations (researched option)
• MLA Works Cited page (researched option)

Questions to ask about the paper (list your questions):

36 | ASSIGNMENT: COMPARE AND EVALUATE

ASSIGNMENT: COMPARE AND EVALUATE

Compare and Evaluate Essay

Length: 3-5 pages
Due date:

Student Learning Objectives (SLOs)

• Define judgments and criteria that are appropriate to the objects of evaluation/comparison
• Evaluate using these judgments and criteria
• Produce a compare-and-contrast essay

Description of assignment:

Compare-and-contrast essays and the objects, phenomena, and/or ideas that they describe are an important
kind of paper—they offer a chance to see beyond binaries and to view things in a complex and nuanced way.
So, for this assignment, we will choose two related subjects or subjects that are often grouped together and
describe in detail their similarities and differences.

Goal of assignment:

The goal of this assignment is to see two subjects in a more rich and detailed way in order to uncover why these
two subjects are often grouped together or why they should be. At the same time, this paper also asks you to see
how these subjects are complex and should be viewed with all their nuances and differences. We are, in short,
making a paper out of a Venn diagram, where similarities and differences are described, as illustrated below,
where the overlap between the circles signifies the similarities between two subjects.

Skills we will work on with this paper:

• Observation and description

• Argumentation
• Thesis creation
 ASSIGNMENT: COMPARE AND EVALUATE | 37

• Organization
• Use of transitional words

Suggestions for topics:

Historical Events: The French and American Revolutions

Technology and Social Media: Twitter and Facebook
People: Beyoncé and Madonna
Ideas: Evolution and Creationism

Rubric [with percentage breakdown for different aspects of

evaluation/grade (%)]:

Purpose & Supporting Details (30 points)

• Clear contrast and comparison/specific examples/relevant information. 30 points

• Clear contrast and comparison/general examples/relevant information. 20 points
• Fairly clear contrast and comparison/general examples/includes non-relevant information. 10 points
• Incomplete contrast and comparison/missing examples/includes non-relevant information. 5 points

Organization and Structure (30 points)

• Organization follows a consistent order, with logical connections between similarities and differences.
30 points
• Organization doesn’t always follow a consistent order, but logical connections between similarities and
differences are present. 20 points
• Organization doesn’t follow a consistent order, and logical connections are missing. 10 points
• Little sense that the comparison and contrast is organized. 5 points

Thesis (20 points)

• Thesis explains the contrast and comparison, highlights the importance of the comparison/contrast. 20
points
• Thesis explains the contrast and comparison, gestures to the importance of the comparison/contrast. 15
points
• Thesis explains the contrast and comparison, and the importance of the comparison/contrast is implied.
10 points
38 | ASSIGNMENT: COMPARE AND EVALUATE

• Thesis doesn’t explain contrast and comparison and makes passing reference to the importance of the
comparison/contrast. 5 points

Grammar and Formatting (20 points)

• No errors in grammar or spelling that distract the reader from the content. MLA formatting is correct.
20 points
• A few errors in grammar or spelling that distract the reader from the content. MLA formatting is
correct. 15 points
• Multiple errors in grammar or spelling that distract the reader from the content. Some MLA formatting
is incorrect. 10 points
• Errors mostly distract the reader from content. MLA formatting is missing or mostly incorrect. 5 points

Possibilities (the best essays do this):

• Present a logical and connected discussion of similarities and differences, avoiding lists of things that are
similar or dissimilar.
• Choose subjects to compare and contrast that are similar enough to warrant the comparison and
different enough to create a compelling argument.
• Make clear the “so what” of the essay—why does this comparison and contrast matter? The most
advanced essays address the relevance of these comparisons and contrasts in explicit and implicit ways.

Pitfalls (common mistakes students make with this assignment):

• A data dump of similarities and differences that appear as lists

• Choosing things that are too different or too similar
• Not addressing why these similarities and differences are important

Writing Rhetorically: Framing First Year Writing Copyright © 2022 by LOUIS: The Louisiana Library Network is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License, except where otherwise noted.
 STUDENT WORKSHEET: COMPARE AND EVALUATE | 39

STUDENT WORKSHEET: COMPARE AND

EVALUATE

Student Worksheet for Compare-and-Contrast Essay

Compare-and-Contrast Essay

Length requirement:
Point of view (first person or third person): Third person
Due date:

Rhetorical mode and chosen topic:

Compare/contrast/evaluation

Research requirements:

While research is not required, please cite any research that you incorporate or consult. Your primary mode of
information will come from your own observation, most likely.

Thinking ahead:

Essay’s main idea and thesis statement:

How do you treat people, places, and phenomena that have similarities and differences? How do you choose
between these two related things or people? This is the purpose of a compare-and-contrast essay. Your thesis
should frame the two to three subjects and allude to the importance of this comparison.

Basic necessary elements in paper:

• Thesis
• Logical organization
• Evidence
40 | STUDENT WORKSHEET: COMPARE AND EVALUATE

• Two to three similar, yet different, items to compare

• Introduction
• Conclusion

Questions to ask about the paper:

Did you choose items to compare that have appreciable differences and enough similarities?
Does your paper have a narrative, or is it a list? It should not be a list…
Does your essay have a thesis? Does it explain or gesture toward the significance of your comparison/
contrast?
Does your paper organize the comparison/contrast in a logical fashion—usually by types of similarities/
types of differences?
 ASSIGNMENT: CAUSE-EFFECT AND ARGUMENT | 41

ASSIGNMENT: CAUSE-EFFECT AND

ARGUMENT

Cause and Effect and Argument Essay

Length: 3-5 pages
Due date:

Description of assignment:

You will write an argumentative essay that supports a claim or assertion and identifies causes and/or effects
of your supporting statements. Secondary sources are not required. If you include secondary sources for
supporting evidence, you must document your sources in MLA format. Double-space your essay in 12-point
Times New Roman font.

Goal of assignment:

Argumentative essays assert the soundness of a debatable position, belief, or conclusion. Arguments examine
ideas to persuade readers to accept new ideas or to take new actions.

Skills we will work on with this paper:

• Creating a clear, debatable thesis statement

• Developing supporting paragraphs
• Organizing effective arguments
• Avoiding illogical, fallacious reasoning

Suggestions for topics:

• Do social networking sites do more harm than good?

• Should patients have the right to die via physician-assisted suicide?
• Should states establish more rigid gun control laws to buy weapons?
• Your own. (Must have instructor’s approval)
42 | ASSIGNMENT: CAUSE-EFFECT AND ARGUMENT

Rubric:

Thesis/Claim = 20%

• Debatable claim/developed purpose. 20-18 points

• Debatable claim/purpose fair. 17-16 points
• Debatable claim/purpose vague. 15-14 points
• Unclear/question. 13-12 points
• Missing/not relevant. 11-0 points

Supporting Evidence/Content = 30%

• Support links to thesis/well-developed details/rhetorical elements addressed. 27-30 points

• Support links to thesis/developed details/two rhetorical elements addressed. 26-24 points
• Extraneous information included/one rhetorical element included/support not explicitly linked to
thesis. 23-21 points
• Extraneous information included/support not linked to thesis/rhetorical elements not present. 20-18
points
• Ideas are unrelated to thesis/rhetorical elements not present/extraneous information included. 17-00
points

Organization = 30%

• Logical and coherent/effective transitions guide argument. 30-27 points

• Logical and coherent/strong transitions. 26-24 points
• Progression of ideas awkward/transitions missing. 23-21 points
• Missing essay paragraphs/transitions missing. 20-18 points
• Lacks structure/incoherent/illogical. 17-00 points

Grammar/Mechanics = 20%

• Punctuation/mechanics appropriate. 20-18 points

• Errors do not interfere with meaning. 17-16 points
• Repeated errors. Meaning clear. 15-14 points
• Errors interfere with meaning. 13-12 points
• Unclear/multiple errors. 11-00 points
 ASSIGNMENT: CAUSE-EFFECT AND ARGUMENT | 43

Possibilities (the best essays do this):

Argumentation is a process of reasoning that asserts the soundness of a debatable position, idea, belief, or
course of action. Arguments clearly articulate the writer’s position and persuade readers to share the writer’s
perspective and insight.
Consider your purpose and your audience. What do you expect your argument to accomplish? Successful
arguments should:

• Clearly state a debatable thesis

• Present relevant, honest evidence that supports your thesis
• Acknowledge the opposing viewpoints related to your claim
• Provide coherent organization with appropriate transitions
• Proofread, revise, and edit carefully

Pitfalls (common mistakes students make with this assignment):

To establish credibility in your argument, avoid these common errors:

• Do not create a question for your thesis statement.

• Do not create a self-evident/factual thesis statement.
• Do not over-simplify the evidence in your argument.
• Do not create illogical or fallacious evidence that is deceptive and dishonest.
• Do not ignore opposing viewpoints.
• Do not use personal attacks as evidence.

Writing Rhetorically: Framing First Year Writing Copyright © 2022 by LOUIS: The Louisiana Library Network is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License, except where otherwise noted.
44 | STUDENT WORKSHEET: CAUSE-EFFECT AND ARGUMENT

STUDENT WORKSHEET: CAUSE-EFFECT

AND ARGUMENT

Student Worksheet for Cause and Effect and Argument

Essay

Cause and Effect and Argument Essay

Length requirement: 3-5 pages

Point of view (first person or third person): Third person
Due date:

Rhetorical mode and chosen topic:

Cause and effect and argumentation

Research requirements:

You are not required to include secondary resources. However, if you decide to use secondary information for
supporting evidence, you must document all sources in MLA documentation.

Thinking ahead:

Essay’s main idea and thesis statement:

Argumentative essays assert the soundness of a debatable position, belief, or conclusion. Arguments examine
ideas to persuade readers to accept new ideas or to take new actions.
Your thesis statement is the most important sentence in your paper. It is an assertion and answers the
question, “What am I trying to prove?” Your thesis statement is NOT a factual statement or an announcement
of purpose. It is a claim that has to be proven throughout the paper.
 STUDENT WORKSHEET: CAUSE-EFFECT AND ARGUMENT | 45

Basic necessary elements in paper:

Formatting/Style

Your paper should be double-spaced and formatted using MLA heading and MLA documentation as required.

Paragraph Organization

Your paper must include the following elements in separate paragraphs:

Introduction

• Identify the topic/issue

• Describe the major controversy or debate related to your issue
• State your assertion/claim about the issue

Background Information

• Provide information to inform the audience about the issue

• Explain key concepts or terms
• Reiterate your assertion or claim

Supporting Evidence

• Supporting Evidence for Ethos/Ethical Appeal: Establish credibility about the issue by revealing your
experience or knowledge. In other words, show why the audience should believe what you are proposing
in your assertion.
• Supporting Evidence for Logos/Logical Appeal: Explain universal facts or widely accepted concepts
relating to your issue. For example, explain how your issue relates to current laws, constitutional rights,
or money.
• Supporting Evidence for Pathos/Emotional Appeal: Connect to audience-based beliefs or values
about your claim. For example, appeal to patriotic values, human values, or moral ideas.

Counterargument and Refutation

• Counterargument: Summarize major opposing counterarguments about your claim. This shows
fairness and establishes credibility.
• Refutation: Respond to opposing counterarguments by pointing out the weaknesses and emphasizing
the strength of your position.
46 | STUDENT WORKSHEET: CAUSE-EFFECT AND ARGUMENT

Conclusion

Restate your assertion or claim. This is the last opportunity you will have to present your case. Remind the
audience of your assertion. Summarize main points. Offer a recommendation or course of action.

Questions to ask about the paper:

• Does my introduction identify my topic?

• Is my thesis debatable?
• Did I include background information about my topic?
• Did I establish ethos/credibility relating to the topic in a separate paragraph?
• Did I establish logos/logical appeal relating to the topic in a separate paragraph?
• Did I establish pathos/emotional appeal relating to the topic in a separate paragraph?
• Did I acknowledge the major counterarguments and provide rebuttals to emphasize my claim?
• Did I remind the audience of my claim/assertion in an effective conclusion?
• Did I include the appropriate MLA documentation for all secondary sources?
• Did I proofread, revise, and edit for grammar, punctuation, and mechanical errors?
 CHAPTER 1: INVENTION | 47

CHAPTER 1: INVENTION
48 | CHAPTER 1: INVENTION
 INVENTION | 49

INVENTION
Kirk Fontenot

Student Learning Outcomes

• Define the steps in the writing process

• Recognize the process of invention and differentiate between prewriting strategies

What Is Invention?
Invention is the start of the writing process. Invention means to come up with an appropriate topic, to
develop a main idea about that topic, and to gather supporting evidence for that main idea. Prewriting is what
we call the exercises that help you through the invention process. You can then start laying the groundwork for
arrangement by writing an outline, which will give your ideas focus and organization.

Have you ever been given a writing assignment and sat down at a computer, pulled up a word processing
program, and just stared at the blank document, feeling overwhelmed? Most of us have at some point! A writer
is not a person who just naturally has the ability to turn that blank document into an essay; instead, a writer is
anyone who has learned the writing process. Writing is a skill, which means that anyone who is willing to learn
the steps and practice them can do it successfully.
The writing process described here is not just a technique from a textbook; this is how writers write in
real life. Imagine a writer working for a local newsmagazine. I’m sure you’ve seen those kinds of magazines.
They’re usually found outside of grocery stores or in a doctor’s waiting room, and they highlight local news
and events. Imagine that this writer receives an email from his editor: “I’d like you to write an article promoting
50 | INVENTION

an upcoming party that will raise money for cancer research.” The writer accepts the job and starts the writing
process, with the goal of having a clear, interesting article at the end.
The first step in this process is called invention. Invention is how any writer gets started. It usually involves
some kind of prewriting. Prewriting is any exercise that helps the writer generate ideas and get started—and
avoid staring at that blank word processor document! The goal of prewriting is to discover the point that you
want to make. In this instance, the writer may start by making a list of questions they need to answer in the
article: When and where is the party? How much are tickets? Is it casual or formal attire?
At this point, the writer needs to gather evidence. To gather evidence means to develop support for the
point you’re making. When writing about a personal experience, prewriting activities may also help generate
these supporting ideas. However, research is also sometimes a part of the invention process. A lot of academic
writing and professional writing will require research on the topic. The writer in this scenario will conduct
research by contacting the person organizing the party and finding out the answers to those prewriting
questions they wrote down.
Notice how at no point did the writer sit and stare at a blank word processor document! Writing is an
active process. Following the steps laid out in these chapters will ensure success at any writing project, whether
personal, academic, or professional.
Now that you’ve seen an overview of the invention process, let’s go through it in more detail.

Prewriting Techniques
Prewriting is the first stage in the writing process. When using a prewriting strategy, you jot your initial
thoughts about a topic down on paper. Prewriting has no set structure or organization; it is usually just a
collection of ideas that may find themselves in your paper over time. Prewriting is also a great way to get
past writer’s block—that period of time when you find you have no ideas or don’t know how to put your
thoughts together. Many students want to skip the prewriting stage of the writing process because they see it as
unnecessarily burdensome and time-consuming. However, dismissing the prewriting stage as being completely
unnecessary is a critical misstep. Prewriting is an essential part of the entire writing process because it enables
you to begin documenting the process by which the eventual essay will be formed and evaluated.

Freewriting

Freewriting is the process of simply writing down any and all ideas about the topic that pop into your mind.
Set a timer for yourself and write continuously for 5 or 10 minutes on your topic. If you run out of ideas,
rewrite the last word or phrase on the page until another idea jumps into your thoughts; never stop writing!
It’s even better to write off topic for a minute than to stop writing, even if you write about what you had for
breakfast this morning! Keep writing, even if it doesn’t make sense! At this point, you are just getting your
ideas down on paper without editing or judging them. Don’t worry about formatting or organization. If you
 INVENTION | 51

are trying to decide between topics, it is a good idea to freewrite on all of them to see which one provides you
with the best ideas.

Mind-mapping

Mind-mapping is very similar to freewriting, but the outcome often looks more like a list of ideas. This
strategy is quite similar to brainstorming where the listed ideas may or may not be connected with arrows or
lines. You should set a time limit of 5 to 10 minutes and jot down all the ideas you have about the topic. Instead
of writing sentences, you are quickly jotting down ideas, perhaps showing connections and building a map of
your thoughts.

Questioning

In questioning, make a list of questions about your topic and try to answer them. Start with the “who, what,
when, where, why, how” type of questions. One helpful trick is to imagine yourself as a journalist for your local
news station covering this topic as a news story. What kinds of questions would a reporter ask? Remember that
reporters are seeking out specific, detailed information, so write those kinds of questions!

Sketching

A picture is worth a thousand words. Your first thinking is done in pictures. So, if you are a visual learner and
like to sketch out your thoughts, try sketching. Grab a pen and paper and draw what you are thinking. This
strategy is especially effective if you are trying to conceptualize an idea or clarify relationships between parts of
an idea. Sketching involves drawing out your ideas using a pen and paper.
One strategy that can be useful for planning compare-and-contrast-type papers is a Venn diagram. A Venn
diagram is a strategy that uses two (or more) overlapping circles to show relationships between sets of ideas.
The information written where two circles overlap is common to both ideas. The information written outside
the overlapping area is information distinct to only one of the ideas.
52 | INVENTION

Your Turn

Imagine that your writing instructor has asked you to write a review of the most recent movie or
TV show you’ve watched. Which of the prewriting techniques we discussed would you turn to?

Key Terms

• Invention
• Gathering evidence
• Prewriting
• Freewriting
• Mind-mapping
• Questioning
• Sketching

Summary/Conclusion
Whichever strategy you choose, be sure to save your prewriting work. You may want to revisit this stage of the
writing process again to make sure that you captured all your thoughts in your outline or first draft.

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
 INVENTION | 53

online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

Reflective Response

“The hardest part of a writing assignment is just getting started.” Students often say this; do you
agree? Why do you think getting started on a writing project is such a challenge for so many?
54 | INVENTION

Which of the suggestions in this chapter will you try when it’s time to start your next writing
assignment?

This chapter has been adapted and remixed by Kirk Fontenot from the following textbooks and materials:
English Composition licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License;
[Link] licensed under a Creative
Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License; and You, Writing!, also
licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International (CC BY-NC-
SA 4.0). This remixed chapter in Writing Rhetorically is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-
NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License, as well.
 CHAPTER 2: ARRANGEMENT | 55

CHAPTER 2: ARRANGEMENT
56 | CHAPTER 2: ARRANGEMENT
 ARRANGEMENT | 57

ARRANGEMENT
Wanda M. Waller

Student Learning Outcomes

• Identify components of an effective introduction, body, and conclusion

• Organize essays with an effective introduction, body, and conclusion

What Is Arrangement?
Arrangement is the organization and structure of ideas in your essay. Choosing the right structure depends
on the application of critical thinking for your purpose. At times, the arrangement is specified by an assignment
or suggested by clues for a given topic. However, all essays, regardless of the pattern of development, should
have an introduction, body, and conclusion.

The Introduction
The introduction is the first paragraph of an essay and plays an important role in writing an effective paper.
The goals of the introduction are to introduce the topic, to provide background about the topic, and to
establish the main idea, purpose, and direction. The introduction has three essential parts, each of which serves
a particular purpose: the hook, relevant background, and thesis statement.

• The Hook—The hook engages your reader’s interest. It can be in the form of a question, a quote, an
anecdote or story, an interesting fact, or an original definition.
• Relevant Background—Background information creates context by providing a brief overview. This
58 | ARRANGEMENT

information helps readers see why you are focusing on the topic and transitions them to the main point
of your paper.
• Thesis Statement—The thesis statement expresses the overall point and main ideas that will be
discussed in the body. It usually appears as the last sentence of the introduction and is usually one
sentence.

What NOT to do in an introduction

• Do not apologize. Avoid phrases such as “in my opinion” or “I may not be an expert but…” These
phrases imply that you really don’t know your topic.
• Do not announce what you intend to do. Never begin with phrases such as “In this paper I will…” or
“The purpose of this essay is to…” Your introduction should establish the intention and purpose of the
essay.
• Do not begin with a dictionary definition. Avoid beginning your essay with phrases such as
“According to Webster’s Dictionary…” This method is overused and unoriginal. Create your own to show
a relevant context for your essay.
• Do not be too vague. Avoid irrelevant comments and digressions. Stay focused.

Body
The body paragraphs are a collection of paragraphs related to your topic that provide supporting evidence
for your thesis statement. Each body paragraph should be unified, coherent, and well-developed with a specific
pattern of development. A paragraph is unified when each sentence relates directly to the main idea of the
paragraph which is stated in the topic sentence. A paragraph is coherent if the sentences are logically connected.
Coherence can be accomplished by repeating key words and using transitions to show logical sequence. Review
the attached list of transitional words and phrases.
Body paragraphs should contain three structural components: the topic sentence, supporting sentences, and
the concluding sentence.

• Topic Sentence—The topic sentence is usually the first sentence in the paragraph. It indicates what the
paragraph will discuss and guides the writer and reader. The writer will know what information to
include or exclude, and the reader will understand what the paragraph will discuss.
• Supporting Sentences—Supporting sentences provide examples or facts to support the topic sentence.
• Concluding Sentence—The concluding sentence summarizes the information to show unity within
the paragraph.
 ARRANGEMENT | 59

What NOT to include in the body paragraphs

• Do not include irrelevant information. Material that does not relate to the thesis should be deleted.
• Do not include general or vague information. Specific examples, clear reasons, and precise
explanations communicate your ideas to readers
• Do not under-develop supporting details. Determining how much support is needed depends on
the scope of your thesis statement, audience, and purpose.

Conclusion
The conclusion is the final paragraph of the essay and plays an important role in writing an effective paper.
The conclusion should reinforce your thesis statement and purpose by reiterating the thesis statement and
providing a sense of completeness about the essay’s topic. An effective conclusion will summarize your essay
and provide a final comment about your topic. There are several strategies that are helpful in writing a
conclusion:

• Review key points

• Link the concluding paragraph to the introduction by reiterating a word or phrase
• Recommend a course of action
• Cite a relevant quotation
• Predict a logical outcome

Strategies for writing an effective conclusion

One or more of the following strategies may help you write an effective conclusion.

• Play the “So what” game. If you’re stuck and feel like your conclusion isn’t saying anything new or
interesting, ask a friend to read it with you. Whenever you make a statement from your conclusion, ask
the friend to say, “So what?” or “Why should anybody care?” Then ponder that question and answer it.
• Return to the theme or themes in the introduction. This strategy brings the reader full circle. For
example, if you begin by describing a scenario, you can end with the same scenario as proof that your
essay is helpful in creating a new understanding. You may also refer to the introductory paragraph by
using key words or parallel concepts and images that you also used in the introduction.
• Synthesize, don’t summarize. Include a brief summary of the paper’s main points, but don’t simply
repeat things that were in your paper. Instead, show your reader how the points you made and the
support and examples you used fit together. Pull it all together.
• Include a provocative insight or quotation from the research or reading you did for your paper.
60 | ARRANGEMENT

• Propose a course of action, a solution to an issue, or questions for further study. This can
redirect your reader’s thought process and help her to apply your info and ideas to her own life or to see
the broader implications.
• Point to broader implications.

What NOT to do in a conclusion

• Do not repeat the exact wording of the thesis statement. The thesis statement should be restated in
a new way.
• Do not introduce new points. Your conclusion should reinforce points you have already discussed in
your essay.
• Do not end with an unnecessary announcement. Avoid phrases such as “in conclusion,” “in
summary,” or “to sum up.” The tone of your conclusion should signal that you are drawing to a close.

Your Turn

Consider your most recent writing assignment. Determine if you engaged your reader with an
engaging hook. Did you have a thesis statement that discussed the overall point of your essay? Did
you create topic sentences for each paragraph? Did your conclusion provide a sense of
completeness about the essay’s topic?

Key Terms

• Arrangement
• Introduction
 ARRANGEMENT | 61

• Thesis statement
• The hook
• Topic sentences
• Supporting sentences
• Conclusion

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

Reflective Response (Optional)

Review your arrangement for a writing assignment. What revisions in arrangement would you
consider in your paper? Why?
62 | ARRANGEMENT
 CHAPTER 3: DRAFTING AND REVISING | 63

CHAPTER 3: DRAFTING AND

REVISING
64 | CHAPTER 3: DRAFTING AND REVISING
 DRAFTING AND REVISING | 65

DRAFTING AND REVISING

Will Rogers

Student Learning Outcomes

• Define drafting and revising

• Develop strategies for drafting and revising

Introduction to Drafting and Revising

Throughout this chapter, we’ll discuss some of the methods we can use for drafting essays, but remember that
your drafting process is yours to choose. Find a method that produces the kinds of writing that reflect both
your ideas and your writing voice. Many instructors recommend a practice that is referred to as fast drafting,
in which the student writes under the pressure of a time limit, much like freewriting. This allows students to
create without their inner critic undermining their momentum. It empowers the “creator hand” to work with
agency while silencing the “editor hand.” It is important to note that creating on one hand and editing and
revising on the other are not, however, stages that exist respectively at the beginning and the end. You might,
for example, revise and edit some of your drafts before deciding to add more new material. And as the section
below makes clear, the editing and creating “hands” are very similar often in the stages of revision.

Drafting
To do fast drafting, students first need to set up the conditions that will help in their success and are
appropriate to their abilities to focus. The following are easy steps writers follow:
66 | DRAFTING AND REVISING

• Create a block of time in which there are no interruptions. This should be a realistic length, given a
writer’s ability to focus, from 10 minutes at a time to 75 minutes or longer.
• Decide on the goal: Write a paragraph in 10 minutes, 2 pages in 1 hour, or a complete essay in 1 hour and
15 minutes.

For some, 75 minutes is a good length, but some students find that after 30 minutes, they can no longer
concentrate. If that is the case, they should plan on several shorter sessions of distraction-free time.
During this time, students should turn off their phones and social media, let the dog outside, and ensure
that it’s time for children to sleep. This needs to be quiet, concentrated time.
As the section above makes clear, drafting can be messy—you might include ideas that you later cut, and it is
wise to maintain a separate file for this material as you work through the writing process. But again, you should
let go of your worries about good and bad ideas. There will be time to rethink, rephrase, and rework during the
revision process.

Revising

The Revision Process

Revision literally means to re-see or re-envision a piece of writing. This process may involve adding,
rearranging, removing, and replacing (ARRR) words, sentences, and ideas. Since writing is recursive, revising
may require revisiting the prewriting stage. A recursive process means that you will create, edit, and revise and
return at various points to all three of these stages. Writing is not a strictly linear act, with a beginning, middle,
and end. In fact, revision will help you understand that the writing process is as important as the writing
product!

▪ Adding

What else does the reader need to know? If the essay doesn’t meet the required word or page count, what areas
can be expanded? Where would further explanation help key points to be more clear? This is a good time to go
back to the prewriting notes and look for ideas that weren’t included in the draft.

▪ Rearranging

Even when writers carefully plan their writing, they may need to rearrange sections for their essays to flow
better.

▪ Removing
 DRAFTING AND REVISING | 67

Some ideas just don’t work or don’t contribute enough to the overall goal of the essay. Often when writers
delete excess words or paragraphs, the ideas become clearer.

▪ Replacing

Vivid details help bring writing to life. Writers need to look for strong examples and quotable passages from
outside sources to support their arguments. If particular paragraphs aren’t working well, writers need to try
rewriting them.
Other Useful Strategies

▪ Reverse Outlining

In reverse outlining, the student reads through the written text and notes, noting down the topic of each
paragraph. This way, the student can review if each paragraph has a clear focus and if each paragraph fits
the overall organization of the paper. More on reverse outlining is available at The Purdue Online Writing
Lab (OWL), “Reverse Outlining: An Exercise for Taking Notes and Revising Your Work.”

▪ Reading Aloud

The act of reading one’s essay aloud allows the student to “hear it” in the way a reader will. This act permits the
writer to slow down and pay attention to all words in the essay. They get a sense of what a reader experiences,
where words are clear and effective, and where they are weak. Poorly structured sentences are hard to read
out loud, indicating that this would be a good place to start revising. This technique is a great precursor for
receiving feedback from others. It also helps writers take responsibility for their writing.

▪ Peer and Instructor Feedback

No one becomes a good writer in a vacuum. Sometimes, writing is done for ourselves, but more often, writing
is done to connect to others, to share thoughts, and to communicate something others need to know. At this
stage of the process, it’s important for writers to get the measure of how well their writing works for readers
that they want to entertain, educate, or persuade. Showing the writing to someone else is essential. This might
be done in a writers’ circle or just with a friend who is good with words and can be asked for feedback. It’s best
to show our work to several people to get more than one opinion. Receiving feedback helps writers discover
the strengths in their writing as well as areas that may be improved.
After receiving feedback—whether through track changes in Google Docs or Microsoft Word, on paper,
or verbally in a peer-review session—the writer can discuss the comments with the reviewer. It’s important
that a writer consider these comments. Every reader comes from a different point of view, and the writer may
not agree with everything that is said by various readers. Sometimes, comments will be contradictory. It is the
68 | DRAFTING AND REVISING

writer’s responsibility to ask further and decide how to use comments received. A community that embraces
and nurtures its members through the revision process works to communicate feedback so that everyone can
grow and learn.
Successful college students utilize their resources, specifically their instructors and peers, to get feedback.
Tutoring is an effective means by which students can receive knowledgeable one-on-one feedback about their
writing. It can also be an effective way to help manage time.
Peer mentors provide students with additional one-on-one and group support in writing classrooms or
during office hours. The peer mentor has had the previous experience of completing similar writing
assignments, and students find it helpful when they revise with their expertise in mind.

Something to Remember

Handling Peer and Instructor Reviews

In many situations, you will be required to have at least one of your peers review your essay (and you will, in
turn, review at least one peer’s essay). Even if you’re not required to exchange drafts with a peer, it’s simply
essential at this point to have another pair of eyes, so find a classmate or friend and ask them to look over
your draft. In other cases, your instructor may be intervening at this point with ungraded but evaluative
commentary on your draft. Whatever the system, before you post or trade your draft for review, reflect on
your original statement of purpose to ensure you are giving a clear statement of your desired voice, audience,
message, tone, attitude, and reception. Also, consider preparing a descriptive outline showing how the essay
actually turned out and comparing that with your original plan, or consider writing a brief narrative describing
how the essay developed from idea to execution. Finally, include any other questions or concerns you have
about your draft so that your peer reader(s) or instructor can give you useful, tailored feedback. These reflective
statements and documents could be attached with your draft as part of a writer’s memo. Remember, the more
guidance you give your readers, regardless of whether they are your peers or your instructor, the more they will
be able to help you.
When you receive suggestions for content changes from your instructors, try to put aside any tendencies to
react defensively so that you can consider their ideas for revisions with an open mind. If you are accustomed
only to getting feedback from instructors that is accompanied by a grade, you may need to get used to the
difference between evaluation and judgment. In college settings, instructors often prefer to intervene most
extensively after you have completed a first draft, with evaluative commentary that tends to be suggestive,
forward-looking, and free of a final quantitative judgment (like a grade). If you read your instructors’ feedback
in those circumstances as final, you can miss the point of the exercise. You’re supposed to do something with
this sort of commentary, not just read it as the justification for a (non-existent) grade.
Sometimes, peers think they’re supposed to “sound like an English teacher,” so they fall into the trap of
“correcting” your draft, but in most cases, the prompts used in college-level peer reviewing discourage that sort
 DRAFTING AND REVISING | 69

of thing. In many situations, your peers will give you ideas that will add value to your paper, and you will want
to include them. In other situations, your peers’ ideas will not really work into the plan you have for your paper.
It is not unusual for peers to offer ideas that you may not want to implement. Remember, your peers’ ideas are
only suggestions, and it is your essay, and you are the person who will make the final decisions. If your peers
happen to be a part of the audience to which you are writing, they can sometimes give you invaluable ideas.
And if they’re not, take the initiative to find outside readers who might actually be a part of your audience.
When you are reviewing a peer’s essay, keep in mind that the author likely knows more about the topic than
you do, so don’t question content unless you are certain of your facts. Also, do not suggest changes just because
you would do it differently or because you want to give the impression that you are offering ideas. Only suggest
changes that you seriously think would make the essay stronger.

Your Turn

Here are some activities to work through different kinds of drafting. Remember, drafts
are about not perfection but practice and process/production. In the same vein, you might
need to practice several different strategies and tactics in order to find the best way to
reach that draft that is ready for peer review and revision.

1. Prepare for writing a 75-minute fast draft by doing several prewriting activities, including
brainstorming, focused writing, outlining, and perhaps reading and researching, depending
on the assignment. Then, in an intense, 75-minute time span, write your entire essay as
quickly as possible, including the introduction and conclusion. Don’t stop to concern yourself
with word choice, citations, or grammar. Just get into the flow of ideas and write your essay
all the way to the end. Remember: You can go back and revise and edit all you want, but that
is much easier to do once you have a draft.
2. What kind of writer are you? Look at the following list. Thinking about your past writing
experiences, pick out both what kind of writer you think you are and what kind you want to
be—how are the draft processes similar to and different from these two choices of writers?
(Try to choose two different kinds of writers!)

◦ Are you a sprinter?

Do you have lots of ideas and want to get to them quickly?
If so, you probably skip to drafting and spend a lot of time on revising. Try spending
70 | DRAFTING AND REVISING

more time on the start of the writing process. Spend more time on defining the
audience and purpose and on exploring and planning. Then revising might not be a
Herculean task.
◦ Are you a jogger?
Do you try to go through the writing process one step at a time? Maybe some parts
are harder than others, like the organization or writing a thesis? Try new strategies for
those parts of the writing process that are most difficult. If revision is hard, get lots of
feedback and learn to critique others. If the audience and purpose make no sense,
spend some time looking at how other writers bend their writing to their audiences
and purpose.
◦ Are you a tightrope walker?
Do you want everything to be perfect before you set it down on paper?
◦ Are you a perfectionist?
If so, you probably spend a lot of time at the start of the writing process but have
more trouble with revising. Try being willing to make changes in revision based on
looking at the organization, audience, and purpose. Is everything in the paper really
working together? Don’t be afraid to get rid of parts and start over.

Key Terms

• Brainstorming
• Fast drafts
• Reverse outlines
• Recursive

Summary
Drafting and revising are important parts of the writing process and not optional activities. Drafting and
 DRAFTING AND REVISING | 71

revising are ongoing parts of the writing process, and like most of the process, drafting and revising are activities
that are often helped by assistance from peers or your instructor.

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

Reflective Response (Optional)

Think back to a paper you’ve written: What were its weaknesses? What kind of revisionary
strategy would have improved those weaknesses?

Additional Chapter Sources

This chapter has been adapted and remixed by Will Rogers from the following textbooks and materials:
English Composition licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License;
[Link] licensed under a Creative
Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License; and You, Writing!, also
licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International (CC BY-NC-
72 | DRAFTING AND REVISING

SA 4.0). This remixed chapter in Writing Rhetorically is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-
NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License, as well.
 CHAPTER 4: EDITING AND PROOFREADING | 73

CHAPTER 4: EDITING AND

PROOFREADING
74 | CHAPTER 4: EDITING AND PROOFREADING
 EDITING AND PROOFREADING | 75

EDITING AND PROOFREADING

Shelly Rodrigue

Student Learning Outcomes

• Identify techniques of editing and proofreading

• Modify an essay that has already been through the rough draft and revision processes

What Is Editing?
Editing is improving an essay by using various methods of revision. It can involve major and minor changes
to an essay’s content, structure, or language. There are multiple stages to editing: content editing, line editing,
copy editing, and proofreading.
In content editing, you can expect to make major changes to your work. Take an early draft of the essay
and add or delete content as needed. Perhaps your thesis statement required revision, or you needed more
substantial evidence to support your claims. Adjust your introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion
accordingly.
In line editing, you may need to rearrange words or phrases to make sure your meaning is clear. Some
paragraphs may benefit from restructuring in order to create a sense of flow in the essay. Make sure each
paragraph begins with a topic sentence, has supporting details to back up that topic sentence, and ends with a
transitional sentence.
In copy editing, pay attention to each sentence’s grammar. Make sure there are no obvious critical errors
such as sentence fragments or run-on sentences. Make sure that your tone and tense are consistent. Double-
check your formatting to make sure it is styled appropriately (usually MLA, APA, or Chicago).
In proofreading, scan each sentence for misspelled words, incorrect punctuation, or stylistic inconsistencies
(such as capitalization). At this point, you are combing through the essay for minor errors that may have been
missed previously. This is the final stage in editing before submitting a final draft.
76 | EDITING AND PROOFREADING

The Steps of Editing and Proofreading

After drafting an essay, it is time to begin editing and proofreading. Start with content editing first. Double-
check the overall content and organization of the essay. The writing should be easy to follow and logically
ordered. At this point, you may need to change the order of sentences or even move whole paragraphs to
ensure the essay has a sense of flow. Make sure that the essay reflects your conceptual intent and responds
appropriately to the writing prompt. It is a good idea to recheck the assignment guidelines and make sure that
your essay has all of the required components. For example, if your instructor has asked for a five-paragraph
essay with an introduction, three body paragraphs, and a conclusion, then you know you will need to add a
paragraph if there are only four paragraphs in your essay. Now is also a good time to check the word count and
page count of your essay. If the essay is too short or too long, then you will need to add or delete sections until
it is the appropriate length. Be sure to apply any required formatting to the essay to easily see its length. Any
big changes you need to make to your essay should be completed in this step of the editing process.
Once the biggest changes have been made, you can move on to line editing. In this stage of the editing
process, you want to look at each paragraph individually, line by line. Check the word choice for syntactical
errors. Be careful to avoid clichés. Make sure the language you use is both clear and precise and that the tone
you use is appropriate for your topic. If you are writing an essay about a serious issue such as starving children,
then you want to maintain a serious tone throughout the essay. It would not be a good idea to insert humor
in such a topic. On the other hand, if you are writing an essay about the necessity of attending clown school,
then jokes are more likely to be received well, as clowns are associated with entertainment. Now is also a good
time to review the order of sentences in each paragraph. It is a good idea to make sure the paragraph has a topic
sentence that clearly identifies what the paragraph will discuss and that each subsequent sentence supports that
topic sentence. If you notice any sentences that veer off topic or don’t seem to make sense, then you can remove
or revise them. Once the topic has been adequately discussed with supporting details, check to make sure there
is a transitional sentence at the end of the paragraph. This will signal to readers that the discussion of this topic
is complete while pointing readers onward to the next topic your essay will discuss.
Now that organizational issues have been addressed, it is time to begin copy editing. From here on out,
your essay should not require any major changes, so it is a good idea to print the essay and mark additional
edits with a pen or pencil. In this stage of the editing process, try to find any obvious grammatical errors such
as sentence fragments, run-on sentences, and subjects and verbs that disagree. Double-check your spelling,
punctuation, and capitalization. In formal essays, it is a good idea to avoid first-person pronouns, contractions,
and colloquial language. Scan for these things as you read over your essay. Another issue that is easy to miss is
changing verb tense. Make sure it is consistent. Some authors will accidentally switch back and forth between
past and present tense. To avoid confusing your readers, pick a tense and stick with it, switching only when
necessary (such as showing a shift in time). Likewise, if a sentence begins with a singular noun, then you
should use a singular pronoun when referring to that noun, and if a sentence begins with a plural noun,
then you should use a plural pronoun. A mistake students often make is to begin a sentence with a noun like
 EDITING AND PROOFREADING | 77

“person” and then use “they” as its pronoun. “Person” implies one, whereas “they” implies more than one
(unless someone specifically stated they/them are their preferred pronouns). To balance a sentence, use singular
and plural nouns and pronouns consistently. One more element to address in this stage of editing is factual
inconsistencies. Make sure the information you provide to readers is accurate. This step can be thought of as
“fact-checking.” After all of these items have been checked, spend some time reviewing your formatting. If
your instructor has requested MLA, APA, or Chicago format, then it is important to check that format’s most
recent style guide.
The last step in the editing process is proofreading. The goal of proofreading is to go through the essay one
last time searching for minor errors such as incorrect or missing punctuation, misspelled words, and stylistic
inconsistencies (such as capitalizing words that are not proper nouns). While your computer’s grammar
checker can help point out some errors, you should not rely on it to catch every potential error in your essay.
You are your own best editor. However, after looking over your paper several times, your eyes can miss things.
The following strategies may help you to catch errors you would have otherwise missed:

• Read the essay aloud. Sometimes your ears will hear an error even if your eyes skip over it.
• Read the essay backward, starting with the final sentence and ending with the first sentence. This will
allow you to have a fresh perspective on your sentences.
• Do an initial proofread of the essay, and then physically step away from it. Give yourself some time
before you read over it again to give your eyes and your mind a break.
• Have a friend or peer read over the essay to look for mistakes.
• Visit your school’s writing center to help with finishing touches on the essay.

Your Turn

Think about your most recent writing assignment. Once the essay has been drafted and revised,
begin the editing and proofreading processes. Take a break between each step in the process so
you can approach each step after adequate rest. Keep a log in which you record your editing steps,
along with the amount of time you spend on each step, that you can share with your instructor.
78 | EDITING AND PROOFREADING

Key Terms

• Content editing
• Line editing
• Copy editing
• Proofreading

Summary
Editing and proofreading are two important steps in the writing process. Major edits should be done first, but
it is still important to proofread for minor errors before submitting a final draft of an essay.

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]
 EDITING AND PROOFREADING | 79

Reflective Response (Optional)

Now that you have practiced editing and proofreading, what mistakes do you notice yourself
making? Which mistakes were easiest to fix? Which mistakes were the most challenging to fix?
80 | EDITING AND PROOFREADING
 CHAPTER 5: NARRATIVE | 81

CHAPTER 5: NARRATIVE
82 | CHAPTER 5: NARRATIVE
 NARRATIVE | 83

NARRATIVE
Shelly Rodrigue

Student Learning Outcomes

• Identify techniques of factual storytelling and descriptive writing, which will culminate in the
writing of a personal narrative essay
• Use point of view, plot, transitions, characters, conflict, theme, and sensory details in an
essay

What Is Narration?
Narration means the art of storytelling, and the purpose of narrative writing is to tell stories. Any time you tell
a story to a friend or family member about an event or incident in your day, you engage in a form of narration.
In addition, a narrative can be factual or fictional. A factual story is one that is based on, and tries to be faithful
to, actual events as they unfolded in real life. A fictional story is a made-up, or imagined, story; the writer of a
fictional story can create characters and events as he or she sees fit.
The big distinction between factual and fictional narratives is based on a writer’s purpose. The writers of
factual stories try to recount events as they actually happened, but writers of fictional stories can depart from
real people and events because the writers’ intents are not to retell a real-life event. Biographies and memoirs
are examples of factual stories, whereas novels and short stories are examples of fictional stories.
Ultimately, whether the story is fact or fiction, narrative writing tries to relay a series of events in an
emotionally engaging way. You want your audience to be moved by your story, which could mean through
laughter, sympathy, fear, anger, and so on. The more clearly you tell your story, the more emotionally engaged
your audience is likely to be.
The use of strong details is crucial as you describe the events and characters in your narrative.
To create strong details, keep the human senses in mind. You want your reader to be immersed in the world
84 | NARRATIVE

that you create, so focus on details related to sight, sound, smell, taste, and touch as you describe people, places,
and events in your narrative. For more information on sensory details, see the chapter on Description.

The Structure of a Narrative

Every day, you relate stories to other people through simple exchanges. You may have had a horrible experience
at a restaurant the night before, or you may have witnessed a curious interaction between other people. In
each one of these experiences, there’s a story, and when you begin to share a personal experience, you often
communicate in a narrative mode.
There are two main types of narratives: narratives about a personal experience and narratives about other
people’s experiences.
Narratives about the writer’s personal experience typically use the first-person “I” pronoun because the
narrator is the person who was physically present for the events described. The writer chooses details and
language that reveal the narrator’s feelings about the events that are taking place.
Narratives written about other people’s experiences typically use the third-person pronouns “he, she, it,
they.” Some writers opt to report third-person narratives objectively to relay events in a way that is both
accurate and dispassionate. Examples include history books, lab reports, and news stories.
Regardless of the narrator’s point of view, major narrative events are most often conveyed in
chronological order, the order in which events unfold from first to last. Stories typically have a beginning,
a middle, and an end, and these events are typically organized by time. Certain transitional words and
phrases aid in keeping the reader oriented in the sequencing of a story. Some of these phrases are listed here:

Chronological Transitional Words

after/afterward as soon as at last
before currently during
eventually finally first, second, third
later meanwhile next
now since soon
still then until
when/whenever while
 NARRATIVE | 85

Other basic components of a narrative are:

• Plot – The events as they unfold in sequence.

• Characters – The people who inhabit the story and move it forward. Typically, there are minor
characters and main characters. The minor characters generally play supporting roles to the main
character, also known as the protagonist.
• Conflict – The primary problem or obstacle that unfolds in the plot that the protagonist must solve or
overcome by the end of the narrative. The way in which the protagonist resolves the conflict of the plot
results in the theme of the narrative.
• Theme – The ultimate message the narrative is trying to express; it can be either explicit or implicit.

Writing a Narrative Essay

When writing a narrative essay, start by asking yourself if you are writing a factual or fictional story. Then
freewrite, brainstorm, or mind map about topics that are of general interest to you.
Once you have a general idea of what you will be writing about, you should sketch out the major events of
the story that will compose your plot. Typically, these events will be revealed chronologically and climax at a
central conflict that must be resolved by the end of the story.
As always, it is important to start with a strong introduction to hook your reader into wanting to read more.
Try opening the essay with an event that is interesting to introduce the story and get it going. Finally, your
conclusion should help resolve the central conflict of the story and impress upon your reader the ultimate
theme, or unifying idea, of the piece.

Professional Writing Example

“Fish Cheeks” by Amy Tan is an example of a well-written personal narrative. As you read the following
narrative, try to determine the narrative’s point of view, plot, characters, transitions, conflict, and theme. See if
you can identify areas where the author has included descriptive details.

Fish Cheeks

I fell in love with the minister’s son the winter I turned fourteen. He was not Chinese, but as
white as Mary in the manger. For Christmas I prayed for this blond-haired boy, Robert, and a
slim new American nose.
86 | NARRATIVE

When I found out that my parents had invited the minister’s family over for Christmas Eve
dinner, I cried. What would Robert think of our shabby Chinese Christmas? What would he
think of our noisy Chinese relatives who lacked proper American manners? What terrible
disappointment would he feel upon seeing not a roasted turkey and sweet potatoes but
Chinese food?

On Christmas Eve I saw that my mother had outdone herself in creating a strange menu. She
was pulling black veins out of the backs of fleshy prawns. The kitchen was littered with
appalling mounds of raw food: A slimy rock cod with bulging eyes that pleaded not to be
thrown into a pan of hot oil. Tofu, which looked like stacked wedges of rubbery white sponges.
A bowl soaking dried fungus back to life. A plate of squid, their backs crisscrossed with knife
markings so they resembled bicycle tires.

And then they arrived – the minister’s family and all my relatives in a clamor of doorbells and
rumpled Christmas packages. Robert grunted hello, and I pretended he was not worthy of
existence.

Dinner threw me deeper into despair. My relatives licked the ends of their chopsticks and
reached across the table, dipping them into the dozen or so plates of food. Robert and his family
waited patiently for platters to be passed to them. My relatives murmured with pleasure when
my mother brought out the whole steamed fish. Robert grimaced. Then my father poked his
chopsticks just below the fish eye and plucked out the soft meat. “Amy, your favorite,” he said,
offering me the tender fish cheek. I wanted to disappear.

At the end of the meal my father leaned back and belched loudly, thanking my mother for her
fine cooking. “It’s a polite Chinese custom to show you are satisfied,” explained my father to our
astonished guests. Robert was looking down at his plate with a reddened face. The minister
managed to muster up a quiet burp. I was stunned into silence for the rest of the night.

After everyone had gone, my mother said to me, “You want to be the same as American girls on
the outside.” She handed me an early gift. It was a miniskirt in beige tweed. “But inside you
must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have
shame.”

And even though I didn’t agree with her then, I knew that she understood how much I had
suffered during the evening’s dinner. It wasn’t until many years later – long after I had gotten
over my crush on Robert – that I was able to fully appreciate her lesson and the true purpose
behind our particular menu. For Christmas Eve that year, she had chosen all my favorite foods.
 NARRATIVE | 87

Questions for Discussion

1. What point of view does Amy Tan use in “Fish Cheeks”?

2. Who are the characters in the narrative?
3. Where does Amy Tan use transitions?
4. What is the main conflict in the narrative? How is it resolved?
5. What is the theme of “Fish Cheeks”?
6. What are three examples of description from this narrative?

Student Writing Example

The following essay, “Bayou Monster,” was written by an English 101 student, who wrote this personal
narrative to challenge the idea that a monk’s life is boring. As you read this story, look for places where the
author has incorporated the same narrative techniques found in Amy Tan’s essay.

Bayou Monster

It was a scorcher that day. The wind and trees were no help. The shade was only being supplied
so far off the bank. Baseball caps can only do so much to protect the head from the sun’s
powerful rays. The mosquitoes were rampant, their feeble attempt at survival. There was a lack
of warm-blooded animals for them to prey on. We were the likely targets, the only ones that
would dare venture that far out into a swamp. In addition to the nagging pests, the feebleness
of the body takes its toll on the mind. Doubts began to swirl in my head of when we would
ever stop to rest. Thoughts of unrest, discomfort, and selfishness shot from my bones up to my
brain, causing a disinterested taste on my part for this “lovely day out.”

Just as my thoughts became increasingly negative and the downward swirl of discomfort was
reaching the highest degree, I heard, “Get ready; it’s our first one!” Suddenly a slight rush of
energy came out of nowhere, pushing me forward onto my toes, ready for what came next. As
the boat slowed for the approach, I snapped a quick glance around. I noticed the others received
the same kind of rejuvenation that I had experienced. Their heads moved forward toward the
88 | NARRATIVE

front of the boat, their bodies posturing upward to get the best look. Suddenly, I found myself
hanging halfway off the front bow reaching down for a rope that had spent most of its
existence submerged in nature. After I grabbed the rope, the next hardest thing to get a handle
on was my fear, which manifested itself in the form of unsteady hands. As I pulled the rope
further into the boat, I thought, “This stuff only happens in movies.” The partner boat was only
a few feet away, readied with cameras, and smiles behind the lenses.

What I saw next was unutterable. Coming up behind the rope was a massive net. The net
wasn’t the problem, though; rather, what the net contained had my mind tangled a bit. At first
glance, anyone would say, “It’s a fish.” It looked like a fish, moved like a fish, and it certainly
smelled like a fish. Drawing closer to this mysterious creature, I tried to get a better look at it.
Suddenly there was an eerie sound. Caused by a mix of fluid and air being pushed through a
small hole at a high rate of speed. I told myself, “This beast has lungs.” As the rest of its body
surfaced, it became clear that the creature I had helped pull from the water was not just any old
fish. It was a prehistoric monster that made its way through the waters of history until now. It
had teeth the size of my fingers, eyes that had seen little sunlight, and a head the size of my
torso. It suddenly became difficult to breathe normally. I was in shock.

Thanks be to God and all that is good for our fearless boat captain. He had seen this sort of
thing before. This became clear when I glanced up to find a smile bigger than the sun on his
face. Though a few teeth were missing, it did not seem to stifle his cheer. Oh, the laughter that
came from this large man. His amusement caused my discomfort. Sheepishly, I managed to ask,
“What are we going to do with that thing?” His answer was clear, striking, and firm. Looking
over the specimen wrapped in the net behind me, he said, “We’re going to kill it and eat it.”
Indeed, we did. Carefully and with much fear, we pulled this living hunk of marsh onto the deck
of the boat. Watching its every move as he untied what was left of the mangled nets. He then
calmly requested his “special tool” from behind the steering wheel. With a crooked smile and a
strange sense of confidence, he said smoothly, “Just a little amnesia.” Then the inevitable
happened. Thud! Thud! Thud! He raised the hatchet high in the air and delivered several deadly
strikes to the uppermost part of the beast’s head. After the third swing, the beast ceased to
move about on the deck of the bayou cruiser. It let out its final breath, almost a sigh of relief.
We all stood there in silence for a moment, trying to process the most eventful and mysterious
five minutes of our lives.

Before we knew it, we had the monster back at the camp to be cleaned and packaged. Several
grown men had to grab its slimy body to fashion a hoist over its snout to get it onto the deck of
the cleaning station. As we grabbed it, our eyes were fixed on its massive teeth. We wondered
 NARRATIVE | 89

if the beast would awake from its seeming lethargy seeking revenge. Once a few pictures were
snapped of us with our accidental catch, we began to clean the alligator garfish with much
frustration. Fish that large have skin like armor, making it difficult even for the experienced
veterans. Research showed that although it is an exceptionally large fish, it wouldn’t have
topped the world record holders. I like to share this fishing story from time to time with friends
and men who tend to boast of their “biggest catches.” It is a fond memory to share with many,
especially those who call my life “boring.” If they only knew.

Questions for Discussion

1. What point of view does the author use in his essay? How does it differ from Amy Tan’s
essay?
2. Who are the characters in this narrative? Which ones are major? Which are minor?
3. Where does the author use transitions? Why do you think he placed them there?
4. What is the main conflict in the narrative? How is it resolved?
5. What is the theme of “Bayou Monster”? What is one sentence that reveals the
narrative’s theme?
6. What are three examples of description in this narrative?

Your Turn

What is an exciting or interesting true story you like to tell? Summarize it in one sentence.

Who are some characters that appear in your story?

What are some transition words you notice yourself using when you tell this story?

What might be a possible theme of this story?

90 | NARRATIVE

Key Terms

• Narration
• Point of view
• Transitions
• Characters
• Plot
• Conflict
• Theme

Summary
Narration is the art of telling lively, engaging stories. Personal narratives are true stories that authors tell
about either their lives or the lives of people around them. The elements common to most narratives include
narration, description, point of view, transitions, characters, plot, conflict, and theme. By using these elements
in your writing, you will be able to successfully complete a personal narrative essay.

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]
 NARRATIVE | 91

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

Reflective Response

Now that your personal narrative is complete, reflect on the writing process. What was the most
challenging part of composing your narrative? Which part would you consider the easiest?

Additional Chapter Sources

Amy Tan’s short essay “Fish Cheeks” first appeared in Seventeen magazine. ©1987. All rights reserved. Included
under Fair Use.
Student work, “Bayou Monster,” reproduced anonymously with permission. All rights reserved.

Narrative Copyright © 2022 by Shelly Rodrigue is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0
International License, except where otherwise noted.
92 | NARRATIVE
 CHAPTER 6: DESCRIPTION | 93

CHAPTER 6: DESCRIPTION
94 | CHAPTER 6: DESCRIPTION
 DESCRIPTION | 95

DESCRIPTION
Shelly Rodrigue

Student Learning Outcomes

• Identify techniques of descriptive writing, which will culminate in the writing of a descriptive
essay
• Use sensory details in a logical order in each stage of the writing process

What Is Description?
Description is a report of observations made through using the five senses. A description includes all relevant
details, such as characteristics or qualities, of a person, place, thing, or event. The use of these details invites
readers to imagine that they can experience your subject as if they were seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting, or
touching it. Another word for these sensory details in writing is imagery.
Description can serve one of two purposes:
Provide information objectively: the details used will be functional, impartial, or public. This type of
description leaves out the writer’s emotions. The subject is discussed both clearly and exactly so that readers
easily understand it. Academic writing usually features this kind of description. One example would be a
biology report on a particular species of fish. The writer might describe sensory data that would allow readers
to easily identify this species such as color patterns, number of fins, habitat, and unique behaviors.
Provide information subjectively: the details used will be impressionistic, emotional, or personal. This type
of description relies on the writer’s feelings. The reader’s understanding of the subject is guided and influenced
by the writer’s personal feelings about it. One example would be if you retold the experience of trying a new
restaurant and explained why you did or did not like it.
Description is often essential to narration. It makes the narration livelier and allows the subjects in the
narrative to be unmistakably clear.
96 | DESCRIPTION

The Organization of Descriptive Writing

Descriptive writing can be organized in various ways. The three most common are chronological (time) order,
spatial (location) order, and order of importance.
When describing an occasion such as a birthday party, a writer may use chronological order to describe
a series of events in the order they unfolded. For example, the writer may describe the decorating of the
venue, the arriving of the first guests, the singing of “Happy Birthday,” the cutting of the cake, the opening
of presents, and the departing of the last guests. The larger event of the birthday party can be broken down
into mini events that occur in a specific order. If the order of the events is changed, then readers may become
confused. Giving readers a timeline they can follow is one strategy you can use to keep them engaged in your
writing.
Describing things in spatial order is another way to keep readers’ attention. When describing a room, a
writer may describe it floor to ceiling, left to right, or even near to far. This will help readers to envision
a specific space. For example, a writer may want to describe an office. The writer might state that the wall
opposite the door has a large window with thick blinds; on each side of the window, there is a six-foot-tall white
bookcase; along the wall on the left side of the room is a teal velvet recliner over which a gold lamp leans; along
the wall on the right side of the room is a small, oak desk with a rolling chair. Details such as these are much
more exciting to readers than saying the room is 100 square feet with a window on one wall.
A third way to engage readers in your descriptive writing is to place the details in the order of importance.
Some writers will start with the smallest detail and leave the most important detail for last, while others start
with the most striking detail and gradually shift to the least important detail. For example, in describing a
vampire, a writer might start with the red eyes or the long fangs and then mention the pale face or vice versa.
Other common components of descriptive writing are:

• Similes – comparing one thing to another in order to make a vivid description, usually using the words
like or as (for example, her lips are as red as roses).
• Metaphors – applying a word or phrase to an object or action to which it is not usually applied (for
example, the alligator’s teeth are white daggers).
• Analogy – making a comparison showing how two things are alike with the goal of pointing out
something about the comparison (for example, fishing is like catching Pokémon; try as you might, you
can never catch them all, and the biggest ones always get away).

Writing a Description
When writing a description, consider the five senses: tasting, touching, seeing, smelling, hearing. Most
descriptions consist of a noun and one or more adjectives relating to the five senses. For example, to describe
popcorn, a writer may say that it is soft, warm, buttery popcorn.
 DESCRIPTION | 97

Keep in mind that adjectives follow a specific order in English: opinion (lovely, wonderful), size (big, small,
short, tall), physical quality (smooth, rough, scaly), shape (round, square, circle), age (young, old), color
(red, green, blue), origin (American, Japanese, Egyptian), material (metal, wood, plastic), type (four-sided, all-
purpose), and purpose (cleaning, painting, cooking). Readers will expect you to follow this order, so deviating
from it can cause confusion.
It is important to choose the most exact and precise words to create the clearest imagery you can for your
readers. For example, a big house and a mansion have slightly different meanings. You want to choose the words
that most accurately reflect your ideas.
Words have both denotations (literal meanings) and connotations (positive or negative associations). A
writer’s word choice can inform readers about the writer’s tone, or attitude, toward the subject. For example,
to show readers that a house is in great condition, a writer might describe a sturdy, new construction. The word
sturdy implies that the writer sees the structure in a positive light. For the opposite case, a writer might describe
a dilapidated shack. The word dilapidated tells readers that the writer likely views the structure in a negative
light.

Professional Writing Example

Below is an excerpt of “Fish Cheeks” by Amy Tan. For the full essay, see the chapter on Narration. Here, Tan
uses vivid description to help readers visualize her family’s kitchen during a holiday dinner where her American
and Chinese cultures clash.

Fish Cheeks

On Christmas Eve I saw that my mother had outdone herself in creating a strange menu. She
was pulling black veins out of the backs of fleshy prawns. The kitchen was littered with
appalling mounds of raw food: A slimy rock cod with bulging eyes that pleaded not to be
thrown into a pan of hot oil. Tofu, which looked like stacked wedges of rubbery white sponges.
A bowl soaking dried fungus back to life. A plate of squid, their backs crisscrossed with knife
markings so they resembled bicycle tires.

Questions for Discussion

1. What words reveal the author’s tone?

2. How many adjectives can you find?
3. Which description seems to stand out the most?
98 | DESCRIPTION

4. To which of the five senses does Tan appeal? Give 3 examples.

Student Writing Example

The following essay, “My Spectacular Visit to the Arches,” was written by an English 101 student. This essay
was written to describe the author’s favorite vacation. As you read the essay, look for descriptive language. See
if you can find any similes, metaphors, or analogies.

My Spectacular Visit to the Arches

Throughout my life, my family and I have always wanted to travel west. Personally, I enjoy
exploring new places that are unlike southern Louisiana. One place in particular that I especially
wanted to visit was Arches National Park in Moab, Utah. I remember being amazed at how a
place so different from my home could possibly exist. When I was around thirteen years old, my
parents, my aunt, and I were finally able to go to Arches. For most people, traveling on a plane
is a simple solution to going across the country in just a few hours. However, driving is the only
safe option for me because I have an extremely severe peanut allergy. Even though I knew it
would be difficult to travel eighteen hours for the trip, I was determined to see this majestic
place in person.

After three days of driving, we arrived at our condo in Durango, Colorado. The day we visited
Arches, we left our condo at 6 a.m. in order to get there early. I was so ecstatic to go that I could
barely sleep during the previous night. When we reached a certain point on our drive, I noticed
an obvious change of scenery. The ground suddenly became vastly more barren, and the green
hills changed to red and orange. Approximately three hours later, we finally saw the sign for
Arches. First, we went to the visitor center and picked up a few souvenirs. We then grabbed
our tickets and traversed the park’s roads in our car. From the roads, we could see graceful
arches and enormous mountains. I could even see the white-capped Rocky Mountains behind
the extensive red terrain of Utah. Since we had been driving for so long, we got out of the car
to have a picnic. I was delighted to be able to eat outside without being attacked by hordes of
 DESCRIPTION | 99

mosquitoes like at home. My aunt remarked that she had never experienced a place that was as
peaceful as this national park.

Following our picnic, we went hiking on some of the larger arches. It would have been an
optimal day for hiking if not for the blustery cold wind. The wind may have been strong, but it
could not compare to my desire to explore this otherworldly location. I can still remember when
I climbed one arch and gazed upon the park. I was entranced by the sight so much that I tripped
and fell. Luckily, I was not hurt, so we returned to our car and continued sightseeing. Along the
ride, I saw a few more interesting formations. One arch was shaped like an elephant while
another looked like there was a face engraved into a large rock. My favorite structure, the
Balanced Rock, was a massive circular boulder on top of a thinner pillar. I was perplexed at how
this configuration could defy gravity. On our way back, we saw a platform with several
binoculars that were positioned toward the Delicate Arch. There was a giant drop off between
the platform and the arch, so it was impossible to get any closer to it.

As we were about to leave, I noticed a sign for a path to the Delicate Arch. Although we knew it
would be difficult to walk on a three-mile trail, my dad and I agreed that we could not waste
this opportunity. We saw many other geological formations as we walked along the endless
path. With every second we walked, my desire to reach the arch grew with more intensity. At
some point, I heard a sound from a nearby bush. I thought that I saw a snake slithering under it.
Even though I am usually scared of snakes, I continued on undeterred. Shortly after, we reached
the arch. My excitement grew to new heights as we patiently waited for the other tourists to
take their pictures. Once it was our turn to go take pictures, I rushed to stand underneath the
Delicate Arch. I became overjoyed to be in the presence of a natural structure that has survived
for millions of years. After we took our pictures, we slowly returned to our car still awe-inspired
from what we witnessed. One of these pictures is even on my refrigerator today.

On the way back home, all I could think about was when we were going to return. To this day,
Arches is the most magnificent place that I have ever seen. Some people would think that there
is nothing special about looking at nature. However, I have never gotten the same feeling of
amazement and astonishment that I received from visiting Arches. Although it took several
days of driving for this visit, I am entirely grateful for having the opportunity. Perhaps in a few
years, I will return to Arches and experience this feeling again.

Questions for Discussion

1. What descriptions does the author use to show a change in scenery?

2. How does the author describe the “interesting formations”?
100 | DESCRIPTION

3. What order is the information in: chronological, spatial, or importance? How do you
know? Provide evidence from the essay.
4. What difference does the author notice between eating outside on this trip versus eating
outside back home?

Your Turn

What is an exciting or interesting event you have experienced? Choose one moment from the
event. What sights, sounds, smells, feelings, or tastes did you experience?

Key Terms

• Description
• Imagery
• Chronological order
• Spatial order
• Simile
• Metaphor
• Analogy
• Tone
• Connotation
• Denotation
 DESCRIPTION | 101

• Sensory details

Summary/Conclusion
Description is the process of relaying information to readers based on observations you have made with
your five senses. This information can be organized in a variety of ways, but the three most common are
chronological, spatial, and order of importance. Comparisons are often a great way to provide vivid details to
readers. Using description is a strategy that will help you to engage your readers.

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]
102 | DESCRIPTION

Reflective Response

Now that you have learned about description, how do you think your writing will change? What
are some descriptive techniques you would like to try?

Additional Chapter Sources

Amy Tan’s short essay “Fish Cheeks” first appeared in Seventeen magazine. ©1987. All rights reserved. Included
under Fair Use.
Student work, “My Spectacular Visit to the Arches,” reproduced anonymously with permission. All rights
reserved.
 CHAPTER 7: DEFINITION | 103

CHAPTER 7: DEFINITION
104 | CHAPTER 7: DEFINITION
 DEFINITION | 105

DEFINITION
Kirk Fontenot

Student Learning Outcomes

• Compose a clear, succinct definition of a nuanced term or concept.

• Illustrate a core definition by providing examples that represent the range of possible
meanings of the term or concept.
• Understand and apply the concepts of denotation and connotation to increase clarity of a
term or concept’s definition.

What Is Definition?
Definition is the rhetorical mode that we use when our thesis includes a term that we define for our audience.
This type of essay is not just a dictionary entry or an encyclopedia article. A definition essay includes a point
that we are making about the term; in other words, it has a point of view.
It is important to keep our audience in mind as we compose the definition essay. Our essay must leave the
reader with a clear understanding of the term and should not be filled with technical language or jargon. When
selecting evidence for the essay, we should ask ourselves, “Is this going to help my reader understand what this
term means?” We’ll only include the evidence if the answer is definitely yes.

Definition
We use definition in our writing and conversations all the time! Here are some examples:
Joe is too bossy.
106 | DEFINITION

The word bossy is a subjective term, meaning that different people may have different ideas of what it means
to be bossy. In order to make your point, define bossy and provide examples of his bossy attitude (poor listening
skills, shouting at people, making decisions without asking a committee—these are what define “bossy” in our
argument).
Low-carb diets are dangerous.
While most people have heard the term low-carb, many may not actually know what it means. Define what
constitutes “low-carb,” and define what you mean by “dangerous.” Cite studies showing harmful effects or
how substances affect the body.
Definition essays may also incorporate other rhetorical modes.

• In this chapter, we will connect definition with illustration/example, which means to use specific
examples as supporting evidence for your point. For instance, when writing about the dangers of low-
carb diets, you might offer examples of fad diets that are low-carb.
• Definition essays may also use descriptive narrative writing. What if, when making the point that low-
carb diets are dangerous, you included the personal experience of a dieter who experienced negative
health consequences?
• Definition essays may also incorporate compare and contrast. In order to clarify what diets are actually
low-carb, we could compare a low-carb diet such as the Paleo Diet to a diet that is not low-carb like
intermittent fasting.

Denotation and Connotation

When writing a definition essay, it’s important to know that there are two elements to any good definition:
denotation and connotation.

• Denotation: offering a literal and explicit definition of a word (to denote means “to indicate”)
• Connotation: positive or negative associations that make up an extended definition of a word

Examples of denotation and connotation

Both denotation and connotation work together to really flesh out a word. In a definition essay, denotation is
critical because our reader needs concrete information to further their understanding. However, connotation
is important, too. It is one way we create a point of view in our essay and develop our thesis.
 DEFINITION | 107

Let’s discuss some examples.

For the first example, think about the feelings you experience when you hear the word “Monday.” Jot down
some initial thoughts. What springs to mind?
For most of us, there is a negative connotation to the word Monday. The alarm clock is more irritating on a
Monday morning, or we might “have a case of the Mondays.” But this negative connotation has nothing to do
with the literal definition, or denotation, of the word “Monday.” The denotation is just “the second day of the
week” or “the first day of the work week.”

Try another example:

Think of the word “prejudice” for a moment. What comes to mind? Think about how we use the word in a
conversation.
Now, google this: “define prejudice.” This dictionary definition is the denotation of the word. That
definition may be literally correct, but what is it missing? Does this definition provide the feeling behind the
word “prejudice”?

One final example:

Here’s a definition of “democracy” written by E.B. White during World War II. (We may know White from
his most famous book, “Charlotte’s Web,” but he was more than a children’s author; he was also a respected
essayist. He wrote on a wide variety of topics, and people respected his opinions. This brief piece appeared in
The New Yorker’s Notes and Comments section on July 3, 1943.) White writes:

We received a letter from the Writers’ War Board the other day asking for a statement on “The Meaning of
Democracy.” It presumably is our duty to comply with such a request, and it is certainly our pleasure.
Surely the Board knows what democracy is. It is the line that forms on the right. It is the don’t in don’t shove. It
is the hole in the stuffed shirt through which the sawdust slowly trickles; it is the dent in the high hat. Democracy
is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half of the time. It is the feeling of
privacy in the voting booths, the feeling of communion in the libraries, the feeling of vitality everywhere. Democracy
is a letter to the editor. Democracy is the score at the beginning of the ninth. It is an idea which hasn’t been disproved
yet, a song the words of which have not gone bad. It’s the mustard on the hot dog and the cream in the rationed coffee.
Democracy is a request from a War Board, in the middle of a morning in the middle of a war, wanting to know
what democracy is.

White’s definition of “democracy” certainly captures the feelings—patriotism, morality, decency—but where
is the literal definition? Does the word “government” appear anywhere? How about “constitution”? Or
“representative”? Here, White is providing all connotation but no denotation. This definition served its
purpose, but it wouldn’t help a high school student pass a Civics test.
So as we can see, denotation and connotation must work together. Writing about “prejudice,” for instance,
as a neutral word with no negativity attached to it would be strange. In a definition essay, you will need facts
108 | DEFINITION

and concrete information for denotation and also elements such as narrative, examples, and description to
create the appropriate connotation.

How to Write a Definition Essay

A definition essay can be deceivingly difficult to write. This type of paper requires you to write a personal yet
academic definition of one specific word. The definition must be thorough and lengthy. It is essential that
you choose a word that will give you plenty to write about, and there are a few standard tactics you can use
to elaborate on the term. Some definition essays will require some research, while others will rely on personal
experience; this chapter will provide guidance for both options. Here are a few guidelines to keep in mind when
writing a definition essay.

Part 1 of 3: Choosing the Right Word

1: Choose an abstract word with a complex meaning.

A simple word that refers to a concrete word will not give you much to write about, but a complex word
that refers to an abstract concept provides more material to explore.

• Typically, nouns that refer to a person, place, or thing are too simple for a definition essay. Nouns that
refer to an idea work better, however, as do most adjectives.
• For example, the word “house” is fairly simple, and an essay written around it may be dull. By switching
to something slightly more abstract like “home,” however, you can play around with the definition
more. A “home” is a concept, and there are many elements involved in the creation of a “home.” In
comparison, a “house” is merely a structure.

2: Make sure that the word is disputable.

Aside from being complex, the word should also refer to something that can mean different things to
different people.

• A definition essay is somewhat subjective by nature since it requires you to analyze and define a word
from your own perspective. If the answer you come up with after analyzing a word is the same answer
anyone else would come up with, your essay may appear to lack depth.

3: Choose a word you have some familiarity with.

Dictionary definitions can only tell you so much. Since you need to elaborate on the word you choose to
define, you will need to have your own base of knowledge or experience with the concept you choose.
 DEFINITION | 109

• For instance, if you have never heard the term “pedantic,” your understanding of the word will be
limited. You can introduce yourself to the word for your essay, but without previous understanding of
the concept, you will not know if the definition you describe is truly fitting.

4: Read the dictionary definition.

While you will not be relying completely on the dictionary definition for your essay, familiarizing yourself
with the official definition will allow you to compare your own understanding of the concept with the simplest,
most academic explanation of it.

• As an example, one definition of “friend” is “a person attached to another by feelings of affection or

personal regard.” Your own ideas or beliefs about what a “friend” really is likely include much more
information, but this basic definition can present you with a good starting point in forming your own.

5: Research the word’s origins.

Look up your chosen word in the Oxford English Dictionary or in another etymology dictionary.

• These sources can tell you the history behind a word, which can provide further insight into a general
definition as well as information about how a word came to mean what it means today.

Part 2 of 3: Potential Elements of an Effective Definition

1: Write an analysis.
Separate a word into various parts. Analyze and define each part in its own paragraph.

• You can separate “return” into “re-” and “turn.” The word “friendship” can be separated into “friend”
and “ship.”
• In order to analyze each portion of a word, you will still need to use additional defining tactics like
negation and classification.
• Note that this tactic only works for words that contain multiple parts. The word “love,” for instance,
cannot be broken down any further. If defining “platonic love,” though, you could define both
“platonic” and “love” separately within your essay.

2: Classify the term.

Specify what classes and parts of speech a word belongs to according to a standard dictionary definition.

• While this information is very basic and dry, it can provide helpful context about the way that a given
word is used.
110 | DEFINITION

3: Compare an unfamiliar term to something familiar.

An unfamiliar or uncommon concept can be explained using concepts that are more accessible to the average
person.

• Many people have never heard of the term “confrere,” for instance. One basic definition is “a fellow
member of a profession, fraternity, etc.” As such, you could compare “confrere” with “colleague,” which
is a similar yet more familiar concept.

4: Provide traditional details about the term.

Explain any physical characteristics or traditional thoughts used to describe your term of choice.

• The term “home” is often visualized physically as a house or apartment. In more abstract terms, “home”
is traditionally thought to be a warm, cozy, and safe environment. You can include all of these features in
a definition essay on “home.”

5: Use examples to illustrate the meaning.

People often relate to stories and vivid images, so a fitting story or image that relates to the term can be used
in clarifying an abstract, formless concept.

• In a definition essay about “kindness,” for example, you could write about an act of kindness you
recently witnessed. Someone who mows the lawn of an elderly neighbor is a valid example, just as
someone who gave you an encouraging word when you were feeling down might be.

6: Use negation to explain what the term does not mean.

If a term is often misused or misunderstood, mentioning what it is not is an effective way to bring the
concept into focus.

• A common example would be the term “courage.” The term is often associated with a lack of fear, but
many will argue that “courage” is more accurately described as acting in spite of fear.

7: Provide background information.

This is when your research about the etymology of a word will come in handy. Explain where the term
originated and how it came to mean what it currently means.

Part 3 of 3: Definition Essay Structure

1: Introduce the standard definition.

 DEFINITION | 111

You need to clearly state what your word is along with its traditional or dictionary definition in your
introductory paragraph.

• By opening with the dictionary definition of your term, you create context and a basic level of
knowledge about the word. This will allow you to introduce and elaborate on your own definition.
• This is especially significant when the traditional definition of your term varies from your own
definition in notable ways.

2: Define the term in your own words in your thesis.

Your actual thesis statement should define the term in your own words.

• Keep the definition in your thesis brief and basic. You will elaborate on it more in the body of your
paper.
• Do not repeat part of the defined term in your definition.

3: Separate different parts of the definition into separate paragraphs.

Each tactic or method used to define your term should be explored in a separate paragraph.

• Note that you do not need to use all the possible methods of defining a term in your essay. You should
use a variety of different methods in order to create a full, well-rounded picture of the term, but some
tactics will work great with some terms but not with others.

4: Conclude with a summary of your main points.

Briefly summarize your main points around the start of your concluding paragraph.

• This summary does not need to be elaborate. Usually, looking at the topic sentence of each body
paragraph is a good way to form a simple list of your main points.
• You can also draw the essay to a close by referring to phrases or images evoked in your introduction.

5: Mention how the definition has affected you, if desired.

If the term you define plays a part in your own life and experiences, your final concluding remarks are a good
place to briefly mention the role it plays.

• Relate your experience with the term to the definition you created for it in your thesis. Avoid sharing
experiences that relate to the term but contradict everything you wrote in your essay.
112 | DEFINITION

Professional Writing Example

The Downside of Cohabiting before Marriage by Meg Jay

At 32, one of my clients (I’ll call her Jennifer) had a lavish wine-country wedding. By then,
Jennifer and her boyfriend had lived together for more than four years. The event was attended
by the couple’s friends, families, and two dogs.

When Jennifer started therapy with me less than a year later, she was looking for a divorce
lawyer. “I spent more time planning my wedding than I spent happily married,” she sobbed.
Most disheartening to Jennifer was that she’d tried to do everything right. “My parents got
married young so, of course, they got divorced. We lived together! How did this happen?”

Cohabitation in the United States has increased by more than 1,500 percent in the past half
century. In 1960, about 450,000 unmarried couples lived together. Now the number is more
than 7.5 million. The majority of young adults in their 20s will live with a romantic partner at
least once, and more than half of all marriages will be preceded by cohabitation. This shift has
been attributed to the sexual revolution and the availability of birth control, and in our current
economy, sharing the bills makes cohabiting appealing. But when you talk to people in their
20s, you also hear about something else: cohabitation as prophylaxis.

In a nationwide survey conducted in 2001 by the National Marriage Project, then at Rutgers and
now at the University of Virginia, nearly half of 20-somethings agreed with the statement, “You
would only marry someone if he or she agreed to live together with you first, so that you could
find out whether you really get along.” About two-thirds said they believed that moving in
together before marriage was a good way to avoid divorce.

But that belief is contradicted by experience. Couples who cohabit before marriage (and
especially before an engagement or an otherwise clear commitment) tend to be less satisfied
with their marriages — and more likely to divorce — than couples who do not. These negative
outcomes are called the cohabitation effect.

Researchers originally attributed the cohabitation effect to selection, or the idea that cohabitors
were less conventional about marriage and thus more open to divorce. As cohabitation has
become a norm, however, studies have shown that the effect is not entirely explained by
individual characteristics like religion, education or politics. Research suggests that at least some
of the risks may lie in cohabitation itself.
 DEFINITION | 113

As Jennifer and I worked to answer her question, “How did this happen?” we talked about how
she and her boyfriend went from dating to cohabiting. Her response was consistent with
studies reporting that most couples say it “just happened.”

“We were sleeping over at each other’s places all the time,” she said. “We liked to be together,
so it was cheaper and more convenient. It was a quick decision but if it didn’t work out there
was a quick exit.”

She was talking about what researchers call “sliding, not deciding.” Moving from dating to
sleeping over to sleeping over a lot to cohabitation can be a gradual slope, one not marked by
rings or ceremonies or sometimes even a conversation. Couples bypass talking about why they
want to live together and what it will mean.

WHEN researchers ask cohabitors these questions, partners often have different, unspoken —
even unconscious — agendas. Women are more likely to view cohabitation as a step toward
marriage, while men are more likely to see it as a way to test a relationship or postpone
commitment, and this gender asymmetry is associated with negative interactions and lower
levels of commitment even after the relationship progresses to marriage. One thing men and
women do agree on, however, is that their standards for a live-in partner are lower than they
are for a spouse.

Sliding into cohabitation wouldn’t be a problem if sliding out were as easy. But it isn’t. Too
often, young adults enter into what they imagine will be low-cost, low-risk living situations
only to find themselves unable to get out months, even years, later. It’s like signing up for a
credit card with 0 percent interest. At the end of 12 months when the interest goes up to 23
percent you feel stuck because your balance is too high to pay off. In fact, cohabitation can be
exactly like that. In behavioral economics, it’s called consumer lock-in.

Lock-in is the decreased likelihood to search for, or change to, another option once an
investment in something has been made. The greater the setup costs, the less likely we are to
move to another, even better, situation, especially when faced with switching costs, or the time,
money, and effort it requires to make a change.

Cohabitation is loaded with setup and switching costs. Living together can be fun and
economical, and the setup costs are subtly woven in. After years of living among roommates’
junky old stuff, couples happily split the rent on a nice one-bedroom apartment. They share
wireless and pets and enjoy shopping for new furniture together. Later, these setup and
switching costs have an impact on how likely they are to leave.
114 | DEFINITION

Jennifer said she never really felt that her boyfriend was committed to her. “I felt like I was on
this multiyear, never-ending audition to be his wife,” she said. “We had all this furniture. We
had our dogs and all the same friends. It just made it really, really difficult to break up. Then it
was like we got married because we were living together once we got into our 30s.”

I’ve had other clients who also wish they hadn’t sunk years of their 20s into relationships that
would have lasted only months had they not been living together. Others want to feel
committed to their partners, yet they are confused about whether they have consciously
chosen their mates. Founding relationships on convenience or ambiguity can interfere with the
process of claiming the people we love. A life built on top of “maybe you’ll do” simply may not
feel as dedicated as a life built on top of the “we do” of commitment or marriage.

The unfavorable connection between cohabitation and divorce does seem to be lessening,
however, according to a report released last month by the Department of Health and Human
Services. More good news is that a 2010 survey by the Pew Research Center found that nearly
two-thirds of Americans saw cohabitation as a step toward marriage.

This shared and serious view of cohabitation may go a long way toward further attenuating the
cohabitation effect because the most recent research suggests that serial cohabitators, couples
with differing levels of commitment and those who use cohabitation as a test are most at risk
for poor relationship quality and eventual relationship dissolution.

Cohabitation is here to stay, and there are things young adults can do to protect their
relationships from the cohabitation effect. It’s important to discuss each person’s motivation
and commitment level beforehand and, even better, to view cohabitation as an intentional step
toward, rather than a convenient test for, marriage or partnership.

It also makes sense to anticipate and regularly evaluate constraints that may keep you from
leaving.

I am not for or against living together, but I am for young adults knowing that, far from
safeguarding against divorce and unhappiness, moving in with someone can increase your
chances of making a mistake — or of spending too much time on a mistake. A mentor of mine
used to say, “The best time to work on someone’s marriage is before he or she has one,” and in
our era, that may mean before cohabitation.

Discussion Questions

1. What is the main term that is being defined in the essay?

 DEFINITION | 115

2. The essay begins with the specific example about “Jennifer.” Does this example provide
denotation or connotation? Explain.
3. Do you feel the writer is creating a positive or negative connotation to the term? To that
end, how does the essay define “the cohabitation effect”?
4. According to the essay, what does “sliding, not deciding” mean? Describe an example of
“sliding, not deciding” from your own life.
5. After reading the essay, do you feel that you have a clear grasp of the meaning of the
term? Explain.

Student Writing Example

Chris Thurman

Cohen

English 111

12/01/10

Extended Definition Essay

When one thinks of the most important quality in a friend or a family member, trust
immediately comes to mind. It can be defined as reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, and
surety of a person or thing. But what does it really mean? Trust, in simple terms, is faith in
another person, despite a lack of an assured outcome.

One characteristic that makes trust unique is its fragility. To gain the trust of a parent or friend,
one must continuously prove one’s honesty and reliability. To gain the complete trust of
someone can take years, but can be lost in a single moment. A perfect example of the delicate
nature of trust can be found in marriage. Two spouses must constantly support and be honest
with each other to gain real trust. However, this bond can be easily broken if one of the spouses
is caught cheating with someone else. Trust in another person can make one feel secure and
loved, while broken trust can lead to the feeling of anger and vulnerability.

One very important question arises when examining trust: If one knows the outcome of
116 | DEFINITION

something before it happens, is there any trust involved? For example, a friend asks to borrow
$10,000 so that he can invest it in a company, and receive more money in return. If one already
knew that they would get the money back at the time of the loan, there is no trust involved.
However, if the investment seems very risky, and the only thing that made one approve is the
friend’s promise of success, then genuine trust takes place. The person that is doing the trusting
should have faith in the person making the promise, not in the event itself. Real trust is not
tested in times of certainty; rather, genuine trust occurs when we are not certain of the
outcome.

Trust can be found in simple things, like a dog relying on his master to feed him, or it can be
found in more complex relationships such as two police officers looking out for each other. Most
friendships are based on trust as well. Friends will not let other friends make bad decisions and
will expect that others will do the same for them. Trust can be proven to others by doing the
right thing even when one is not asked. If other people know that one can handle responsibility
and can manage to do the right thing, even when they are not asked, they will not falter in
providing friendship and support.

Trust has always been a part of everyone’s life whether or not they are aware of it. From the
time we are born, we know that our mother will care for us and show us love and affection. In
our teenage years we hope that our friends and family alike will support our decisions and
correct us if we are wrong. To our college years, we expect that our teachers will accurately
grade everything we do. We even expect our spouse to support and love us throughout our
adult years. We rely on others to take care of our every need when we are old. Even on the day
that we die, we know that our friends and family will be at our funeral to bid us farewell into
the afterlife. We hope that there is a heaven and a hell, one of which will be our final
destination. But throughout our lives, trust follows us everywhere we go and these trusting
relationships that we develop will help lead and guide us. But when it all comes down to it, who
can we trust?

Discussion Questions

1. What is the term that is being defined in the essay?

2. Where in the essay do we find an example of denotation?
3. After reading the essay, would you say there is a positive or negative connotation to the
term?
4. Is this a personal or researched definition essay? Was it the right choice for this topic?
Explain.
 DEFINITION | 117

5. After reading the essay, do you feel that you have a clear grasp of the meaning of the
term? Explain.

Your Turn

When was the last time that you learned a new word? Was it a concept you learned in the
classroom, an unfamiliar term you heard in the news, or a word someone used in conversation?
How did you learn the meaning? Use a prewriting technique to plan an essay in which you teach a
friend the definition of this new word.

Key Terms

• Definition
• Illustration/example
• Denotation
• Connotation

Summary
• Definition writing teaches the audience the meaning of an unfamiliar term.
• Definition writing is not “dictionary writing.”
118 | DEFINITION

• A basic definition and an extended definition are both necessary components.

• Denotation refers to the literal definition of a word.
• Connotation refers to the positive or negative perception of a word.
• Definition essays may incorporate other rhetorical modes such as compare/contrast and illustration/
example.

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

Reflective Response

Once you have read this chapter and written a definition essay, think about your expectations
when you first saw the title of the chapter. What turned out to be different from your
expectations? Which of your expectations turned out to be correct?
 DEFINITION | 119

Additional Chapter Sources

“The Meaning of Democracy” by E.B. White appeared in the July 3, 1943, issue of The New Yorker. All rights
reserved. Used under Fair Use.
“The Downside of Marriage” by Meg Jay appeared in the April 14, 2012, issue of The New York Times. All
rights reserved. Used under Fair Use.

Links Cited

1. [Link]
2. [Link]
3. [Link]
4. [Link]
5. [Link]

Definition Copyright © 2022 by Kirk Fontenot is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License, except where
otherwise noted.
120 | VIDEO: THESIS EXPLAINED

VIDEO: THESIS EXPLAINED

This lecture covers:

• That a thesis is
• Important parts of a thesis
• Tips for writing a quality thesis

One or more interactive elements has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view
them online here: [Link]

“How to Write a Strong Thesis Statement” by Scribbr can be found online. Posted Jan 10, 2020. YouTube
standard licensing terms apply.

Writing Rhetorically: Framing First Year Writing Copyright © 2022 by LOUIS: The Louisiana Library Network is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License, except where otherwise noted.
 EFFECTIVE THESIS STATEMENTS | 121

EFFECTIVE THESIS STATEMENTS

What Is a Thesis Statement?

• A thesis statement tells a reader how you will interpret the significance of the subject matter under
discussion. Such a statement is also called an “argument,” a “main idea,” or a “controlling idea.”
• A good thesis has two parts. It should tell what you plan to argue, and it should “telegraph” how you
plan to argue—that is, what particular support for your claim is going where in your essay.
• A standard place for your thesis is at the end of the introductory paragraph.
• A thesis is an interpretation of a subject, not the subject itself. The subject, or topic, of an essay might be
World War II or Moby Dick; a thesis must then offer a way to understand the war or the novel that
others might dispute.
• A strong thesis not only grabs the interest of your reader, who now wants to see you support your
unique interpretation; it also provides a focus for your argument, one to which every part of your paper
refers in the development of your position.
• A thesis keeps the writer centered on the matter at hand and reduces the risk of intellectual wandering.
Likewise, a thesis provides the reader with a “road map,” clearly laying out the intellectual route ahead.
• A thesis statement avoids the first person (“I believe,” “In my opinion”).

A simple equation for a thesis might look like this:

What you plan to argue + How you plan to argue it = Thesis
Specific topic + Attitude/angle/argument = Thesis

Steps to Write an Effective Thesis Statement

• Choose a prompt or, if appropriate, select a topic: television violence and children.
• Read the prompt carefully or, if appropriate, ask an interesting question:
◦ What are the effects of television violence on children?
• Revise the prompt or question into a preliminary or “working” thesis:
◦ Violence on television increases aggressive behavior in children.
• Avoid general phrasing and/or sweeping words such as “all” or “none” or “every.”
• Lead the reader toward the topic sentences (the subtopics needed to prove the thesis).
• Anticipate the counterarguments. Once you have a working thesis, you should think about what might
be said against it. This will help you to refine your thesis, and it will also make you think of the
122 | EFFECTIVE THESIS STATEMENTS

arguments that you’ll need to refute later on in your essay. (Every argument has a counterargument. If
yours doesn’t, then it’s not an argument—it may be a fact or an opinion, but it is not an argument.)
◦ Violence on television increases aggressive behavior in children.
• This statement is on its way to being a thesis. However, it is too easy to imagine possible
counterarguments. For example, an observer of societal trends may believe that parenting or easy access
to weapons are important factors in youth violence. If you complicate your thesis by anticipating the
counterargument, you’ll strengthen your argument, as shown in the sentence below.
◦ While poor parenting and easy access to weapons may act as contributory factors, in fact, when
children are exposed to television violence, they become less sensitive to the pain and suffering of others,
are more fearful of the world around them, and are more likely to behave in aggressive or harmful
ways toward others.

The Components of an Effective Thesis Statement

• You can’t just pluck a thesis out of thin air. Even if you have a terrific insight concerning a topic, it won’t
be worth much unless you can logically and persuasively support it in the body of your essay. A thesis is
the evolutionary result of a thinking process, not a miraculous creation. Formulating a thesis is not the
first thing you do after reading an essay assignment.
• An effective thesis statement fulfills the following criteria:
◦ Substantial – Your thesis should be a claim for which it is easy to answer every reader’s question:
“So what?”
◦ Supportable – A thesis must be a claim that you can prove with the evidence at hand (e.g., evidence
from your texts or from your research). Your claim should not be outlandish, nor should it be mere
personal opinion or preference (e.g., “Frederick Douglass is my favorite historical figure”). It tackles
a subject that could be adequately covered in the format of the project assigned.
◦ Precise – It is focused and specific. A strong thesis proves a point without discussing everything. It
clearly asserts your own conclusion based on evidence. Note: Be flexible. It is perfectly okay to
change your thesis!
◦ Arguable – It should be contestable, proposing an arguable point with which people could
reasonably disagree.
◦ Relevant – If you are responding to an assignment, the thesis should answer the question your
teacher has posed. In order to stay focused, pay attention to the task words in the assignment:
summarize, argue, compare/contrast, etc.
◦ Aware of Counters – It anticipates and refutes the counterarguments.

The best thesis statement is a balance of specific details and concise language. Your goal is to articulate an
argument in detail without burdening the reader with too much information.
 EFFECTIVE THESIS STATEMENTS | 123

Questions to Review Your Thesis

• “Do I answer the question?” This might seem obvious, but it’s worth asking. No matter how intriguing
or dazzling, a thesis that doesn’t answer the question is not a good thesis!
• “Have I taken a position that others might challenge or oppose?” If not, then you probably do not have
a strong argument. Theses that are too vague often have this problem. If your thesis contains vague
words like “good” or “successful,” see if you could be more specific: why is something “good”; what
makes something “successful”?
• Would anyone possibly care about this thesis? So what? Does your thesis present a position or an
interpretation worth pursuing? If a reader’s first response is, “So what?” then you need to clarify, to
forge a relationship, or to connect to a larger issue.
• “Does my essay support my thesis specifically and without wandering?” Just as a thesis that doesn’t
answer the question ultimately fails, so does a thesis that isn’t properly supported with evidence and
reasoning.
• Does my thesis statement adequately address the direction words of the prompt: summarize, argue,
compare/contrast, analyze, discuss, etc.?

Myths about Thesis Statements

• Every paper requires one. Assignments that ask you to write personal responses or to explore a subject
don’t want you to seem to pre-judge the issues. Essays of literary interpretation often want you to be
aware of many effects rather than seeming to box yourself into one view of the text.
• A thesis statement must come at the end of the first paragraph. This is a natural position for a statement
of focus, but it’s not the only one. Some theses can be stated in the opening sentences of an essay; others
need a paragraph or two of introduction; others can’t be fully formulated until the end.
• A thesis statement must be one sentence in length, no matter how many clauses it contains. Clear
writing is more important than rules like these. Use two or three sentences if you need them. A complex
argument may require a whole tightly-knit paragraph to make its initial statement of position.
• You can’t start writing an essay until you have a perfect thesis statement. It may be advisable to draft a
hypothesis or tentative thesis statement near the start of a big project, but changing and refining a thesis
is a main task of thinking your way through your ideas as you write a paper. And some essay projects
need to explore the question in depth without being locked in before they can provide even a tentative
answer.
• A thesis statement must give three points of support. It should indicate that the essay will explain and
give evidence for its assertion, but points don’t need to come in any specific number.
124 | EFFECTIVE THESIS STATEMENTS

Progressively Complex Thesis Statements

Thesis Statement #1: The North and South fought the Civil War for many reasons, some of
which were the same and some different.

Evaluation: The worst thesis imaginable (other than non-existent). You’ve said nothing of
value.
Thesis Statement #2: While both sides fought the Civil War over the issue of slavery, the
North fought for moral reasons while the South fought to preserve its own institutions.
Evaluation: A good pre-draft thesis. Not a bad start at all. Here’s the catch and the time-
consuming part of the process. As you write, your argument may become more refined or
changed. When it does, so should the thesis.
Thesis Statement #3: While there were many underlying causes of the Civil War, three
factors converged to make conflict inevitable: the issue of slavery, the idea of states’ rights, and
the fight to control the future of the West.
Evaluation: A solid preview of your argument and the main points you intend to make. This
would be a strong approach for a persuasive or exemplification essay.
Thesis Statement #4: While both Northerners and Southerners believed they fought against
tyranny and oppression, Northerners focused on the oppression of slaves while Southerners
defended their own rights to property and self-government.
Evaluation: Good! The thesis statement is nuanced, recognizing the existence of an opposing
point of view while strongly defending your point. It is relatively specific yet concise—and
doesn’t make the reader want to stop reading.

Writing Rhetorically: Framing First Year Writing Copyright © 2022 by LOUIS: The Louisiana Library Network is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License, except where otherwise noted.
 CHAPTER 8: ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE | 125

CHAPTER 8: ILLUSTRATION/
EXAMPLE
126 | CHAPTER 8: ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE
 ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE | 127

ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE
Kirk Fontenot

Student Learning Outcomes

• Characterize the purpose of the illustration/example essay

• Determine the best structure for the illustration/example essay
• Compose an illustration/example essay

Introduction to Illustration/Example
To illustrate means to show or demonstrate something clearly. An effective illustration essay clearly
demonstrates and supports a point using examples and evidence. Ultimately, you want the evidence to help
the reader “see” your point, as one would see a good illustration in a magazine or on a website. The stronger
your evidence is, the more clearly the reader will consider your point.
Illustration/example writing simply means using specific examples to illustrate your point. Every essay has a
point called the thesis statement. The thesis statement is the point you’re trying to make, stated clearly in one
sentence. The rest of the essay is all about proving that point using different types of evidence.
The key to illustration/example is to use specific examples. General statements don’t make much of an
impact on our reader; in other words, they’re boring. No one wants to read a boring essay, so why would you
want to write one?
When thinking of examples, don’t try to come up with examples that can apply to everyone and every
situation; these are general (i.e., boring) examples. Instead, think of specific, personal, interesting, unique
examples.
Here’s an example of general writing that we should avoid:
128 | ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE

I was raised in South Louisiana, and I just don’t like the cooking up here. People here like their
food too bland; I like to season the things that I eat. There are only a few local restaurants that
season their food the way that I like. There are certain dishes that were my favorites back home
that I won’t even touch now that I live here. I guess everyone has different tastes.

There’s nothing wrong with this writing grammatically, but it’s boring.
Compare this to more specific writing:

I was raised in South Louisiana, and I just don’t like the cooking since moving north. People in
Shreveport like their food too bland; I like my food well-seasoned, even spicy. I like a kick! Only a
few restaurants that promise Cajun cuisine, like Bistro Byronz and Shane’s, season their fried
catfish or their seafood gumbo the way Dad does. Boiled crawfish was always my favorite as a
kid, but I won’t even go to a crawfish boil in Shreveport; everyone complains that even mildly
seasoned crawfish is “too hot.” South Louisiana Cajuns clearly have a higher tolerance for
spiciness!

The second example is specific, personal, and more interesting. The writer names specific restaurants and
specific foods.
Illustration/example is an important rhetorical mode because specific examples are always a great way to
make an essay more interesting, no matter what the writing prompt. In fact, if a rough draft of an essay is ever
too short, don’t ever add filler; instead, add specific examples to get to the right length.
To make an essay more interesting, we can add:

• Hypothetical examples that we make up

• Real-life specific examples from personal experience (when appropriate)
• Interesting examples that we read about

In this module, you will develop your skills in illustration/example writing.

 ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE | 129

The Purpose of Illustration in Writing

To illustrate means to show or demonstrate something clearly. An effective illustration essay, also known as an
example essay, clearly demonstrates and supports a point through the use of evidence.
The controlling idea of an essay is called a thesis. A writer can use different types of evidence to support their
thesis. Using scientific studies, experts in a particular field, statistics, historical events, current events, analogies,
and personal anecdotes are all ways in which a writer can illustrate a thesis. Ultimately, you want the evidence
to help the reader “see” your point, as one would see a good illustration in a magazine or on a website. The
stronger your evidence is, the more clearly the reader will consider your point.
Using evidence effectively can be challenging, though. The evidence you choose will usually depend on your
subject and who your reader is (your audience). When writing an illustration essay, keep in mind the following:

• Use evidence that is appropriate to your topic as well as appropriate for your audience.
• Ask yourself: How much evidence do you need to adequately explain your point? Consider how
complex your subject is and how much background your audience may already have.

For example, if you were writing about a new communication software and your audience was a group of
English major undergrads, you might want to use an analogy or a personal story to illustrate how the software
worked. You might also choose to add a few more pieces of evidence to make sure the audience understands
your point.
However, if you were writing about the same subject and your audience members were information
technology (IT) specialists, you would likely use more technical evidence because they would be familiar with
the subject.
Keeping your audience in mind will increase your chances of effectively illustrating your point.

The Structure of an Illustration Essay

The controlling idea, or thesis, belongs at the beginning of the essay. Evidence is then presented in the essay’s
body paragraphs to support the thesis. You can start supporting your main point with your strongest evidence
first, or you can start with evidence of lesser importance and have the essay build to increasingly stronger
evidence. This type of organization is called “order of importance.”
Transition words are also helpful in ordering the presentation of evidence. Words like first, second, third,
currently, next, and finally all help orient the reader and sequence evidence clearly. Because an illustration essay
uses so many examples, it is also helpful to have a list of words and phrases to present each piece of evidence.
Certain transitional words and phrases aid in keeping the reader oriented in the sequencing of a story. Some of
these phrases are listed here:
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Phrases of Illustration

case in point for example

for instance in particular

in this case one example/another example

specifically to illustrate

Vary the phrases of illustration you use. Do not rely on just one. Variety in choice of words and phrasing is
critical when trying to keep readers engaged in your writing and your ideas.

Writing an Illustration Essay

First, decide on a topic that you feel interested in writing about. Then create an interesting introduction to
engage the reader. The main point, or thesis, should be stated at the end of the introduction.
Gather evidence that is appropriate to both your subject and your audience. You can order the evidence
in terms of importance, either from least important to most important or from most important to least
important. Be sure to fully explain all of your examples using strong, clear supporting details.

Professional Illustration/Example Writing

In “April & Paris,” writer David Sedaris explores the unique impact of animals on the human psyche. Click on
the link to view the essay “April & Paris” by David Sedaris or read it below.

April & Paris by David Sedaris

While watching TV one recent evening, I stumbled upon a nature program devoted to the
subject of making nature programs. The cameraman’s job was to catch a bird of paradise in full
display, so he dug himself a hole, covered it with branches, and sat inside it for three weeks.
This was in New Guinea, where the people used to wear sexy loincloths but now stand around
 ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE | 131

in T-shirts reading “I survived the 2002 IPC Corporate Challenge Weekend.” A villager might
wear a pair of gym shorts and then add a fanny pack or a sun visor with the name of a
riverboat casino stitched onto the brim. I suppose that these things came from a relief
organization. Either that or a cruise ship went down and this was what had washed up
onshore.

I’ll wager that quite a few sun visors found their way to Southeast Asia after the tsunami. One
brutal news story after another, and it went on for weeks. The phone numbers of aid
organizations would skitter across the bottom of the TV screen, and I recall thinking that if they
wanted serious donations they ought to show a puppy. People I know, people who had never
before contributed to charity, emptied their pockets when a cocker spaniel was shown standing
on a rooftop after Hurricane Katrina hit, eight months later. “What choice did I have?” they
asked. “That poor little thing looked into the camera and penetrated my very soul.”

The eyes of the stranded grandmother, I noted, were not half as piercing. There she was,
clinging to a chimney with her bra strap showing, and all anyone did was wonder if she had a
dog. “I’d hate to think there’s a Scotty in her house, maybe trapped on the first floor. What’s the
number of that canine-rescue agency?”

Saying that this was everyone’s reaction is, of course, an exaggeration. There were cat people,
too, and those whose hearts went out to the abandoned reptiles. The sight of an iguana sailing
down the street on top of a refrigerator sent a herpetologist friend over the edge. “She seems
to be saying, ‘Where’s my master?'” he speculated. “‘Here it is, time for our daily cuddle and I’m
stuck on the S.S. Whirlpool!!'”

I’ve often heard that anthropomorphizing an animal is the worst injustice you can do to it. That
said, I’m as guilty of it as anyone. In childhood stories, the snail might grab her purse and dash
out the door to put money in the meter. The rabbit cries when the blue jay makes fun of her
buckteeth. The mouse loves his sister but not that way. They’re just like us! we think.

Certain nature shows only add to this misconception, but that, to me, is why they’re so
addictive. Take “Growing Up Camel,” a program my friend Ronnie and I watched one evening. It
was set in a small, privately owned zoo somewhere in Massachusetts. The camel in question
was named Patsy, and the narrator reminded us several times that she had been born on Super
Bowl Sunday. While still an infant (the football stadium probably not even cleared yet), she was
taken from her mother. Now she was practically grown, and the narrator announced a reunion:
“Today Patsy has reached what may be the biggest milestone in her life—moving back in with
her mom.”
132 | ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE

In the next segment, the two were reintroduced, and the grumpy old mother chased her
daughter around the pen. When the opportunity arose, she bit Patsy on the backside, and
pretty hard, it seemed to me. This was the camels not getting along and it wasn’t too terribly
different from the way they acted when they did get along.

When the next break approached, the narrator hooked us with “When we continue, a
heartbreaking event that will change Patsy’s life forever.”

I’d have put my money on an amputated leg, but it turned out to be nothing that dramatic.
What happened was that the mother got bone cancer and died. The veterinarian took it hard,
but Patsy didn’t seem to care one way or another, and why would she, really? All her mom ever
did was browbeat her and steal her food, so wasn’t she better off on her own?

The zookeepers worried that if Patsy were left alone she would forget how to be a camel, and
so they imported some company, a male named Josh and his girlfriend, Josie, who were shipped
in from Texas. The final shot was of the three of them, standing in the sunshine and serenely
ignoring one another. Ronnie cleared her throat and said, “So that’s what became of the little
camel who was born on Super Bowl Sunday.” She turned on the light and looked me in the face.
“Are you crying?”

I told her I had an ash in my eye.

“Growing Up Camel” had its merits, but I think I prefer the more serious kind of nature show,
the kind that follows its subject through the wild. This could be a forest, a puddle, or a human
intestinal tract, it makes no difference. Show me a tiger or show me a tapeworm, and I’ll watch
with equal intensity. In this sort of program we see the creature’s world reduced to its basic
components: food, safety, and reproduction. It’s a constant chain of desperation and heartache,
the gist being that life is hard, and then it ends violently. I know I should watch these things
with an air of detachment, but time and again I forget myself. The show will run its course, and
afterward I’ll lie on the sofa, shattered by the death of a doda or a guib, one of those four-letter
antelope-type things which are forever turning up in my crossword puzzles.

Apart from leaving me spent and depressed, such programs remind me that I am rarely, if ever,
alone. If there’s not an insect killing time on the ceiling, there’s surely a mite staring out from the
bath towel, or a parasite resting on the banks of my bloodstream. I’m reminded, too, that,
however repellent, each of these creatures is fascinating, and worthy of a miniseries.

This was a lesson I learned a few summers back, in Normandy. I was at my desk one afternoon
writing a letter when I heard a faint buzzing sound, like a tiny car switching into a higher gear.
Curious, I went to the window, and there, in a web, I saw what looked like an angry raisin. It
 ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE | 133

was a trapped fly, and as I bent forward to get a closer look a spider rushed forth, and carried it
screaming to a little woven encampment situated between the wall and the window casing. It
was like watching someone you hate getting mugged: three seconds of hardcore violence, and
when it was over you just wanted it to happen again.

It’s hard to recall having no working knowledge of the Tegenaria duellica, but that’s what I was
back then—a greenhorn with a third-rate field guide. All I knew was that this was a spider, a big
one, the shape of an unshelled peanut. In color it ranged from russet to dark brown, the shades
alternating to form a mottled pattern on the abdomen. I later learned that the Tegenaria can live
for up to two years, and that this was an adult female. At that moment, though, as I stood at
the window with my mouth hanging open, all I recognized was a profound sense of wonder.

How had I spent so much time in that house and never realized what was going on around me?
If the Tegenaria barked or went after my food, I might have picked up on them earlier, but, as it
was, they were as quiet and unobtrusive as Amish farmers. Outside mating season, they pretty
much stayed put, a far cry from the Carolina wolf spiders I grew up with. Those had been
hunters rather than trappers. Big shaggy things the size of a baby’s hand, they roamed the
basement of my parents’ house, and evoked from my sisters the prolonged, spine-tingling
screams called for in movies when the mummy invades the delicate lady’s dressing room. “Kill
it!” they’d yell, and then I’d hear a half-dozen shoes hitting the linoleum, followed by a world
atlas or maybe a piano stool—whatever was heavy and close at hand.

I was put off by the wolf spiders as well, but never thought that they were out to get me. For
starters, they didn’t seem that organized. Then, too, I figured they had their own lives to lead.
This was an attitude I picked up from my father, who squashed nothing that was not directly
related to him. “You girls,” he’d say, and no matter how big the thing was he’d scoot it onto a
newspaper and release it outside. Come bedtime, I’d knock on my sisters’ door and predict that
the spider was now crawling to the top of the house, where he’d take a short breather before
heading down the chimney. “I read in the encyclopedia that this particular breed is known for its
tracking ability, and that once they’ve pegged their victims almost nothing will stop them.
Anyway, good night.”

My sisters would have been horrified by the house in Normandy, as would most people,
probably. Even before I joined the American Arachnological Society, the place looked haunted,
cobwebs sagging like campaign bunting from the rafters and curtain rods. If one was in my
way, I’d knock it down. But that all changed when I discovered that first Tegenaria—April, I
called her. After writing her name on an index card and taping it to the wall, I found my interest
spreading to her neighbors. The window they lived in was like a tenement building, one
134 | ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE

household atop another, on either side of the frame. Above April was Marty, and then Curtis
and Paula. Across the way were Linda, Russell, Big Chief Tommy, and a sexless little speck of a
thing I decided to call Leslie. And this was just one window.

Seeing as I’d already broken the No. 1 rule of a good nature documentary —not to give names to
your subjects—I went ahead and broke the next one, which was not to get involved in their
lives. “Manipulating,” my boyfriend, Hugh, would call it, but, to my mind, that was a bit too mad
scientist. Manipulating is cross-breeding, or setting up death matches with centipedes. What I
was doing was simply called feeding.

No Tegenaria, or at least none that I’ve observed, wants anything to do with a dead insect,
even a freshly dead one. A spider’s food needs to be alive and struggling, and because our
house was overrun, and I had some time on my hands, I decided to help out. In my opinion, the
best place to catch flies is against a windowpane. Something about the glass seems to confuse
them, and they get even dopier when you come at them with an open jar. Once one was in, I’d
screw on the lid and act like I was shaking a cocktail. The little body would slam against the
sides, and, as Hugh went progressively Gandhi on me, I’d remind him that these were pests,
disease carriers who feasted upon the dead, and then came indoors to dance on our silverware.
“I mean, come on,” I said. “You can’t feel sorry for everything.”

The Tegenaria build what I soon learned to call “horizontal sheet webs”—dense trampoline-like
structures that are most often triangular, and range in size from that of a folded handkerchief to
that of a placemat. Once my prey was good and woozy, I’d unscrew the lid, and tip the jar
toward the waiting spider. The fly would drop, and, after lying still for a moment or two, it
would begin to twitch and rouse itself, a cartoon drunk coming to after a long night. “What the
fuck…?” I imagined it saying. Then it would notice the wings and foreheads of earlier victims.
“I’ve got to get out of here.” A whisper of footsteps off in the distance, and just as the fly tasted
futility, the monster was upon it.

“And cut!” I would yell.

Watching this spectacle became addictive, and so, in turn, did catching flies. There were days
when I’d throw a good three dozen of them to their deaths—this at the expense of everything
else I was supposed to be doing. As the spiders moved from healthy to obese, their feet tore
holes in their webs. Running became a chore, and I think their legs started chafing. By this
point, there was no denying my emotional attachment. There were nights that first summer
when I’d get out of bed at 3 A.M. and wander into my office with a flashlight. Everyone would
be wide-awake, but it was always April that I singled out. If I thought about her a hundred
times a day, it seemed only fair that she thought about me as well. My name, my face: I didn’t
 ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE | 135

expect these things to register, but, in the way that a body feels the warmth of the sun, I fully
imagined that she sensed my presence, and missed it when I was away.

“That’s all right,” I’d tell her. “It’s only me.” Often, I’d take out my magnifying glass and stare into
the chaos that was her face.

Most people would have found it grotesque, but when you’re in love nothing is so abstract or
horrible that it can’t be thought of as cute. It slayed me that she had eight eyes, and that none
of them seemed to do her any good. They were more like decoration, really, a splay of beads
crowded above her chelicerae. These were what she used to grip her prey, and if you looked at
her the right way you could see them as a pair of enormous buckteeth. This made her appear
goofy rather than scary, though I’d never have said so in her presence. For a Tegenaria, she was
quite attractive, and I was glad to see that Principal Hodges shared my view. He was a freshly
molted adult male who travelled from the other side of the room and spent six days inside her
inner sanctum. Why Marty or Curtis or Big Chief Tommy didn’t mate with April is a mystery,
and I put it on a list beside other nagging questions, such as “What was Jesus like as a teen-
ager?” and “Why is it you never see a baby squirrel?”

As the summer progressed, so did the mysteries. Spiders relocated, both male and female, and I
started noticing a lot of spare parts—a forsaken leg or palp lying in a web that used to belong
to Paula or Philip or the Right Reverend Karen. Someone new would move in, and, as soon as I
tacked up a fresh name card, he or she would vacate without notice. What had once seemed
like a fine neighborhood quickly became a dangerous one, the tenants all thuggish and
transitory. Maybe April was more respected than anyone else in her window unit. Maybe her
enemies knew that she was being watched, but, for whatever reason, she was one of the few
Tegenaria that managed to stay put and survive. In mid-September, Hugh and I returned to the
city and, at the last minute, I decided to buy a plastic terrarium and to take her with me. The
“April in Paris” business didn’t occur to me until we were on the train, and I held her container
against the window, saying, “Look, the Eiffel Tower!”

Funny the details that slip your notice until it’s too late. The fact, for instance, that we don’t
really have flies in Paris, at least not in our apartment. Back in Normandy, catching prey had
been a breeze. I could do it barefoot and in my pajamas, but now I was forced to go outside and
lurk around the trash cans in the Luxembourg Gardens. Someone would toss in a disposable
diaper and I’d stand a few feet from the bin, and wait for the scent to be picked up. Then there’d
be the sneak attack, the clattering jar, the little spell of cursing and foot stomping. Had the flies
been gathered on a windowpane, I would have enjoyed the last laugh, but out in the open, and
with an audience of French people noting my every failure, my beautiful hobby became a chore.
136 | ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE

I’d been telling myself for months that April needed me, though of course she didn’t. An
adequate amount of prey stumbled into her web and she caught it quite capably on her
own—in Normandy, anyway. Now, though, trapped inside a terrarium in a fourth-floor
apartment, she honestly did need me, and the responsibility weighed a ton. Tegenaria can go
without eating for three months, but whenever I returned home empty-handed I could feel her
little spider judgement seeping from the plastic box. The face that had once seemed goofy was
now haughty and expectant. “Hmm,” I imagined her saying. “I guess I had you figured all
wrong.”

In early October, the weather turned cool. Then the rains came and, overnight, every fly in Paris
packed up and left town. April hadn’t eaten in more than a week when, just by chance, I
happened upon a pet store and learned that it sold live crickets, blunt little black ones that
looked like bolts with legs. I bought a chirping boxful and felt very proud of myself until the
next morning, when I learned something that no nature show ever told me: crickets stink. They
reek. Rather than dirty diapers or spoiled meat—something definite you can put your finger
on—they smell like an inclination: cruelty, maybe, or hatred.

No amount of incense or air freshener could diminish the stench. Any attempt only made it
worse, and it was this more than anything that led me back to Normandy. April and I took the
train in late October, and I released her into her old home. I guess I thought that she would
move back in, but in our absence her web had fallen to ruin. One corner had come unmoored
and its ragged, fly-speckled edge drooped like a filthy petticoat onto the window ledge. “I’m
pretty sure it can be fixed,” I told her, but before I could elaborate, or even say goodbye, she
took off running. And I never saw her again.

There have been other Tegenaria since then, a new population every summer, and though I still
feed them and monitor their comings and goings, it’s with a growing but not unpleasant
distance, an understanding that spiders, unlike mammals, do only what they’re supposed to do.
Whatever drives the likes of April is private and severe, and my attempts to humanize it only
moved me further from its majesty. I still can’t resist the fly catching, but in terms of naming
and relocating I’ve backed off considerably, though Hugh would say not enough.

I suppose there’s a place in everyone’s heart that’s reserved for another species. My own is
covered in cobwebs rather than dog or cat hair, and, because of this, people assume it doesn’t
exist. It does, though, and I felt it ache when Katrina hit. The TV was on, the grandmother
signalled from her rooftop, and I found myself wondering, with something akin to panic, if there
were any spiders in her house.
 ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE | 137

Discussion Questions (Part I & Part II)

Part I

1. What is the author’s primary thesis or theme? In other words, what is the point Sedaris is
making?
2. List some specific examples provided by the author to illustrate the point.
3. Does the essay use “multiple” examples (a series of brief examples to illustrate or assert
the thesis) or “extended” examples (longer examples explained through multiple
sentences or paragraphs)?

Part II

This essay also connects back to the previous chapter on definition. Remember, definition is a
rhetorical mode that explains or defines an unfamiliar term in such a way that your audience
can gain a clearer understanding.

Go back to the essay and look for the term “anthropomorphizing.”

1. Based on context clues, what does the term mean?

2. How does the writer’s use of specific examples contribute to the definition?
3. List examples of denotation (the literal meaning) and connotation (the feeling or
attitude) of the term.

Student Illustration/Example Writing

Letter to the City

To: Lakeview Department of Transportation

From: A Concerned Citizen

The intersection of Central Avenue and Lake Street is dangerous and demands immediate
138 | ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE

consideration for the installation of a controlling mechanism. I have lived in Lakeview my entire
life, and during that time I have witnessed too many accidents and close calls at that
intersection. I would like the Department of Transportation to answer this question: how many
lives have to be lost on the corner of Central Avenue and Lake Street before a street light or
stop sign is placed there?

Over the past twenty years, the population of Lakeview has increased dramatically. This
population growth has put tremendous pressure on the city’s roadways, especially Central
Avenue and its intersecting streets. At the intersection of Central Avenue and Lake Street it is
easy to see how serious this problem is. For example, when I try to cross Central Avenue as a
pedestrian, I frequently wait over ten minutes for the cars to clear, and even then I must rush to
the median. I will then have to continue to wait until I can finally run to the other side of the
street. On one hand, even as a physically fit adult, I can run only with significant effort and care.
Expecting a senior citizen or a child to cross this street, on the other hand, is extremely
dangerous and irresponsible. Does the city have any plans to do anything about this?

Recent data show that the intersection of Central Avenue and Lake Street has been especially
dangerous. According to the city’s own statistics, three fatalities occurred at that intersection in
the past year alone. Over the past five years, the intersection witnessed fourteen car accidents,
five of which were fatal. These numbers officially qualify the intersection as the most fatal and
dangerous in the entire state. It should go without saying that fatalities and accidents are not
the clearest way of measuring the severity of this situation because for each accident that
happens, countless other close calls never contribute to city data. I hope you will agree that
these numbers alone are sufficient evidence that the intersection at Central Avenue and Lake
Street is hazardous and demands immediate attention.

Nearly all accidents mentioned are caused by vehicles trying to cross Central Avenue while
driving on Lake Street. I think the City of Lakeview should consider placing a traffic light there
to control the traffic going both ways. While I do not have access to any resources or data that
can show precisely how much a traffic light can improve the intersection, I think you will agree
that a controlled busy intersection is much safer than an uncontrolled one. Therefore, at a
minimum, the city must consider making the intersection a four-way stop.

Each day that goes by without attention to this issue is a lost opportunity to save lives and
make the community a safer, more enjoyable place to live. Because the safety of citizens is the
priority of every government, I can only expect that the Department of Transportation and the
City of Lakeview will act on this matter immediately. For the safety and well-being of Lakeview
citizens, please do not let bureaucracy or money impede this urgent project.
 ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE | 139

Sincerely,

A Concerned Citizen

Discussion Questions

1. What is the thesis of the essay? Where is it found?

2. List one specific example that the writer cites to illustrate their point.
3. Do the examples used in the essay successfully illustrate the point the writer is making?
4. Point out (a) a personal example and (b) an example found through research in this
essay.
5. Describe a hypothetical example that you could add to the writer’s letter that would
further illustrate the point.

Your Turn

Think back to a time when you won an argument by providing a specific example to prove your
point. Use freewriting to describe that argument and the example you cited, then write a brief
outline of an illustration/example essay.

Key Terms

• Illustration
140 | ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE

• Evidence
• Thesis statement
• Transition words

Summary
• An illustration essay clearly explains a main point using evidence.
• When choosing evidence, always gauge whether the evidence is appropriate for the subject as well as the
audience.
• Organize the evidence in terms of importance, either from least important to most important or from
most important to least important.
• Use time transitions to order evidence.
• Use phrases of illustration to call out examples.

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]
 ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE | 141

Reflective Response

Now that you have read the chapter and written an illustration/example essay, describe ways in
which using specific examples can be valuable in personal, academic, and professional writing.

Additional Chapter Sources

“April and Paris” by David Sedaris appeared in the March 24, 2008, issue of The New Yorker. All rights reserved.
Used under Fair Use.

Illustration/Example Copyright © 2022 by Kirk Fontenot is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License,
except where otherwise noted.
142 | ILLUSTRATION/EXAMPLE
 CHAPTER 9: COMPARE/CONTRAST | 143

CHAPTER 9: COMPARE/
CONTRAST
144 | CHAPTER 9: COMPARE/CONTRAST
 COMPARE/CONTRAST | 145

COMPARE/CONTRAST
Will Rogers

Student Learning Outcomes

• Define the purpose and structure of the compare-and-contrast essay

• Produce a compare-and-contrast essay

Introduction to Compare/Contrast
To compare two subjects is to point out their similarities.
Mardi Gras celebrations in both New Orleans and Mamou involve a sense of revelry. There are elaborate
costumes and festive parades. The partying represents a last burst of irreverence before the more solemn Ash
Wednesday.
To contrast two subjects is to point out their differences.
Mardi Gras in New Orleans features parades with huge, elaborate floats put on by “royalty” of Krewes; in
Mamou, on the other hand, Mardi Gras revelers travel on horseback from house to house begging for ingredients
for a communal gumbo.
In this module, you will develop your skills in compare-and-contrast writing.

The Purpose of a Compare/Contrast Essay

Comparison in writing discusses elements that are similar, while contrast in writing discusses elements that
are different. A compare-and-contrast essay, then, analyzes two subjects by comparing them, contrasting them,
or both.
146 | COMPARE/CONTRAST

The key to a good compare-and-contrast essay is to choose two or more subjects that connect in a
meaningful way. The purpose of conducting the comparison or contrast is not to state the obvious but
rather to illuminate subtle differences or unexpected similarities. For example, if you wanted to focus on
contrasting two subjects you would not pick apples and oranges; rather, you might choose to compare and
contrast two types of oranges or two types of apples to highlight subtle differences. For example, Red Delicious
apples are sweet, while Granny Smiths are tart and acidic. Drawing distinctions between elements in a similar
category will increase the audience’s understanding of that category, which is the purpose of the compare-and-
contrast essay.
Similarly, to focus on comparison, choose two subjects that seem at first to be unrelated. For a comparison
essay, you likely would not choose two apples or two oranges because they share so many of the same properties
already. Rather, you might try to compare how apples and oranges are quite similar. For example, both apples
and oranges are sweet and similar in size, weight, and shape. They are both grown in orchards, and both may
be eaten or juiced. The more divergent the two subjects initially seem, the more interesting a comparison essay
will be.

The Structure of a Compare/Contrast Essay

The Thesis Statement

The compare-and-contrast essay starts with a thesis that clearly states the two subjects that are to be compared,
contrasted, or both and the reason for doing so. The thesis could lean more toward comparing, contrasting, or
both. Remember, the point of comparing and contrasting is to provide useful knowledge to the reader. Take
the following thesis as an example that leans more toward contrasting:
Thesis Statement: Organic vegetables may cost more than those that are conventionally grown,
but when put to the test, they are definitely worth every extra penny.
Here the thesis sets up the two subjects to be compared and contrasted (organic versus conventional
vegetables), and it makes a claim about the results that might prove useful to the reader.
The thesis may answer questions like:

• Why am I comparing these two things?

• What did I learn from the comparison?
• Is one of the two subjects better than the other?

Your thesis should make the reason for your comparison very obvious.
You might try this formula for writing your thesis statement:
Subject 1 + Subject 2 + Indication of similarity or difference + Claim = Thesis statement
 COMPARE/CONTRAST | 147

Example: “The Voice” and “American Idol” are both singing competition shows, but “American Idol” is the
original and still the best.
The thesis statement is generally found at the end of the introduction paragraph, after the two topics have
been introduced.

Organization

One way in which a compare/contrast essay is different from other rhetorical modes we’ve discussed is that you
have two options for how you structure your essay.
You can structure your essay in:

• Subject-by-subject (also called “one side at a time”)

• Point-by-point

To better understand each structure, let’s take an example of each. Imagine that we are going to write an essay
that compares two popular stores, Wal-Mart and Target. In the essay, we’ll discuss the prices, the customer
service, and the quality of goods at each store.

First, let’s see an example of subject-by-subject: Essentially, write a separate body about
each subject, but you discuss the same supporting points for both subjects.

I. Introduction: Wal-Mart vs. Target

II. Wal-Mart

1. Prices
2. Customer Service
3. Quality of Goods

III. Target

1. Prices
2. Customer Service
3. Quality of Goods

IV. Conclusion

Notice that the body of the essay is essentially divided in half. Also notice that the same three
148 | COMPARE/CONTRAST

supporting points are discussed in each half and in the same order. This gives the essay a really
clear organization.

Next, let’s see an example of point-by-point: Instead of organizing the essay by the two
subjects, we will organize the essay by the three supporting points. In each section, first make a
point about one subject, then follow it with a comparable point about the other.

I. Introduction: Wal-Mart vs. Target

II. Prices

1. Wal-Mart
2. Target

III. Customer Service

1. Wal-Mart
2. Target

IV. Quality of Goods

1. Wal-Mart
2. Target

V. Conclusion

Notice that in this method, there is more interaction between the two subjects. Each point that
you make about Wal-Mart is directly followed by the same point about Target.

The organizational structure you choose depends on the nature of the topic, your purpose, and your audience.
Generally, subject-by-subject structure may be best for essays that emphasize comparison, while point-by-point
structure may suit essays that focus on contrast. However, this is a guideline, not a rule.
 COMPARE/CONTRAST | 149

Signal Phrases

Given that compare-and-contrast essays analyze the relationship between two subjects, it is helpful to have
some phrases on hand that will cue the reader to such analysis.

Phrases of Comparison:

one similarity another similarity both

like likewise similarly in a similar fashion

Phrases of Contrast:

one difference another difference conversely

in contrast unlike while whereas

Using these phrases throughout your essay will serve as reminders to the reader that you are comparing and
contrasting your two subjects. They will keep the essay focused on the task at hand.

Writing a Compare/Contrast Essay

First, choose whether you want to compare seemingly disparate subjects, contrast seemingly similar subjects,
or compare and contrast subjects. Spend some time freewriting or listing to develop some ideas you can explore
in an essay. (Refer back to the chapter on invention for more strategies to get started.)
Once you have decided on an idea, introduce it with an engaging opening paragraph. Your thesis should
come at the end of the introduction, and it should establish the subjects you will compare, contrast, or both. It
should also state what can be learned from doing so.
Next, write an outline of your essay. Choose between subject-by-subject or point-by-point structure. You
might try writing two outlines, one using each structure option, to see which one you like better.
The organizing strategy that you choose will depend on, as always, your audience and your purpose. You
may also consider your particular approach to the subjects as well as the nature of the subjects themselves; some
subjects might better lend themselves to one structure or the other.
Now, following the structure you’ve established in your outline, write the body paragraphs. Start each body
paragraph with a clear topic sentence. Make sure to use comparison and contrast phrases to cue the reader to
the ways in which you are analyzing the relationship between the subjects.
150 | COMPARE/CONTRAST

Wrap up your essay with a short conclusion paragraph. Summarize the main points. Restate the point of the
comparison that you are making.
As you read through the sample essays in this chapter, watch out for signal phrases that indicate comparison
and contrasting. Also notice the organization; are the essays using subject-by-subject or point-by-point
organization?

Professional Example

By Allison Howard – Peace Corps Volunteer: South Africa (2003–2005)

It’s a Saturday afternoon in January in South Africa. When I begin the 45-minute walk to the
shops for groceries, I can hear thunder cracking in the distance up the mountain in
Mageobaskloof. But at 4 p.m. the sky is still light and bright and I am sure—famous last
words—I will be fine without an umbrella.

Just the basics: eggs, bread, Diet Coke in a bag slung into the crook of my elbow. Halfway from
town, two black South African women—domestic workers in the homes of white Afrikaner
families—stop me with wide smiles. They know me; I’m the only white person in town who
walks everywhere, as they do. They chatter quickly in northern Sotho: “Missus, you must go
fast. Pula e tla na! The rain, it comes!” They like me, and it feels very important to me that they
do. “Yebo, yebo, mma,” I say—Yes, it’s true—and I hurry along in flip-flops, quickening my pace,
feeling good about our brief but neighborly conversation. These are Venda women.

My black South African friends tell me it’s easy to tell a Venda from a Shangaan from a Xhosa
from a Pedi. “These ones from Venda, they have wide across the nose and high in the
cheekbones,” they say. But I don’t see it; I’m years away from being able to distinguish the
nuances of ethnicity. Today, I know these women are Vendas simply because of their clothing:
bright stripes of green and yellow and black fabric tied at one shoulder and hanging quite like a
sack around their bodies. They’ve already extended a kindness to me by speaking in northern
Sotho. It’s not their language but they know I don’t speak a word of Afrikaans (though they
don’t understand why; Afrikaans is the language of white people). They know I struggle with
Sotho and they’re trying to help me learn. So they speak Sotho to me and they’re delighted and
amused by my fumbling responses. And I am, quite simply, delighted by their delight.

The Venda ladies are right: the rain, it comes. Lightly at first, and by habit I begin trotting to
hurry my way home. Just a little rain at first and there are plenty of us out in it. I can see others
 COMPARE/CONTRAST | 151

up ahead on the street and others still just leaving the shops to get back before the real rain
begins.

The people who are walking along this swath of tar road are black. Black people don’t live in
this neighborhood—or in my town at all, for the most part. They work and board here as
domestic workers, nannies, gardeners. Their families live in black townships and rural
villages—some just outside of my town; others far away, in places like Venda.

Today, we’re walking together in the rain, and I’m quickening my pace because—after all, it’s
raining. That’s what you do in the rain. And even though it’s coming down noticeably harder, it’s
80 degrees and I’m not cold, I’m just wet. My hair is stuck to my forehead and my T-shirt is
soaked…and I’m the only one running for cover. And I think: So what? It’s just water and in the
middle of the January summer, it’s warm, refreshing water. Why run? Why do we run from the
rain?

In my life back in the United States, I might run because I was carrying a leather handbag, or
because I wore an outfit that shouldn’t get wet. I would run because rain dishevels and messes
things up. Mostly though, we run because we just do; it’s a habit. I’ve done it a hundred times:
running to my car or the subway station with a newspaper sheltering my head. I have never
not quickened my pace in the rain until today.

It took all of my 27 years and a move to Africa, where I don’t have a leather handbag to shelter
or a pretty outfit to protect. I’m wearing an old cotton skirt and a T-shirt, and I’m drenched, and
I love it. I learn things here in the most ordinary circumstances. And I feel like a smarter, better
woman today because I got groceries in the rain.

But on the long walk home, positively soaked and smiling like a fool, I notice a car pulling over
and a man yelling in Afrikaans to get in, get in. I look in the direction I’ve come from and several
meters behind me is a woman with a baby tied to her back and an elderly man carrying bags,
leading a young boy by the hand. On the road ahead, a woman about my age carries a parcel
wrapped in plastic, balanced precariously on her head. There are maybe 20 people walking with
me in my reverie of rain and they are black. And the man in the car is white and he’s gesturing
frantically for me to get in. Why me? Why not the others? Because I’m white and it’s about
race. Everything is about race here.

This man in the car is trying to do something kind and neighborly. He wants to help me and his
gesture is right, but his instincts are so wrong. How do you resent someone who is, for no
benefit of his own, trying to help? But I do. I resent him and I resent the world he lives in that
taught him such selective kindness. This whole event unravels in a few seconds’ time. He’s
152 | COMPARE/CONTRAST

leaned over and opened the car door, urging me in…and I get in. And we speed past my fellow
walkers and he drops me at my doorstep before I have time to think of anything besides giving
him directions.

It feels like a mistake because I’m ashamed to think what the Venda women would have felt if
he’d ignored them and they had watched me climb into that car. In some ways, the whole
episode seems absurd. I’m not going to atone for 400 years of South African history by walking
with black people in the rain. If I’d refused his ride, he wouldn’t have thought anything besides
the fact that I was certifiably crazy. That’s the thing about being here: I’m not going to change
anything. But I believe it matters in some infinitesimal way that people like the Venda women,
and the dozens of people who may walk alongside me on any given day, know that I’m there. In
black South African culture it is polite to greet every person you pass. That’s what they do, so I
do it, too. On the occasional morning, someone might greet me as “sesi,” sister. I have to believe
that matters; I know it matters to me.

I was disappointed in myself for getting into the car because I acted according to the same habit
that makes us think rain an inconvenience. Just as we run from the rain, I hopped into that car
because I’m supposed to. Conventionally, it makes sense. But convention compels us to do so
many things that don’t make any sense at all. Convention misinforms our instincts. And in a
larger sense, it is convention that propels Afrikaner culture anachronistically into the future. Ten
years after the supposed end of apartheid, I’m living in a world of institutionalized racism.
Convention becomes institution—and it’s oppressive and it’s unjust. I know that if I’m going to
make it here for two more years, I need to walk in the rain. It’s a small, wasted gesture, but it’s
an uncorrupted instinct that makes me feel human.

So much about living here feels like that fraction of a second when the Afrikaner man was
appealing to my conventional sensibilities and the people on the street were appealing to my
human instincts. It may feel unnatural to reject those sensibilities just as, at first, it feels
unnatural to walk in the rain. But if I lose a hold on my instincts here, I’ll fail myself and I’ll fail to
achieve those tiny things that matter so much. It’s simple and it’s small; and it’s everything.
Gandhi said, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.” Indeed. Let it rain.

Discussion Questions

1. Locate the author’s thesis—what is it?

2. How is the essay structured? Is it using subject-by-subject or point-by-point structure?
How can you tell?
 COMPARE/CONTRAST | 153

3. What “points for comparison” does the author use?

4. How does the author go beyond the obvious similarities and differences to interesting
ideas and insights?

Student Example

Comparing and Contrasting London and Washington, DC

By Scott McLean in Writing for Success

Both Washington, DC, and London are capital cities of English-speaking countries, and yet they
offer vastly different experiences to their residents and visitors. Comparing and contrasting the
two cities based on their history, their culture, and their residents show how different and
similar the two are.

Both cities are rich in world and national history, though they developed on very different time
lines. London, for example, has a history that dates back over two thousand years. It was part
of the Roman Empire and known by the similar name, Londinium. It was not only one of the
northernmost points of the Roman Empire but also the epicenter of the British Empire where it
held significant global influence from the early sixteenth century on through the early twentieth
century. Washington, DC, on the other hand, has only formally existed since the late eighteenth
century. Though Native Americans inhabited the land several thousand years earlier, and
settlers inhabited the land as early as the sixteenth century, the city did not become the capital
of the United States until the 1790s. From that point onward to today, however, Washington,
DC, has increasingly maintained significant global influence. Even though both cities have
different histories, they have both held, and continue to hold, significant social influence in the
economic and cultural global spheres.

Both Washington, DC, and London offer a wide array of museums that harbor many of the
world’s most prized treasures. While Washington, DC, has the National Gallery of Art and
several other Smithsonian galleries, London’s art scene and galleries have a definite edge in this
category. From the Tate Modern to the British National Gallery, London’s art ranks among the
154 | COMPARE/CONTRAST

world’s best. This difference and advantage has much to do with London and Britain’s historical
depth compared to that of the United States. London has a much richer past than Washington,
DC, and consequently has a lot more material to pull from when arranging its collections. Both
cities have thriving theater districts, but again, London wins this comparison, too, both in
quantity and quality of theater choices. With regard to other cultural places like restaurants,
pubs, and bars, both cities are very comparable. Both have a wide selection of expensive,
elegant restaurants as well as a similar amount of global and national chains. While London
may be better known for its pubs and taste in beer, DC offers a different bar-going experience.
With clubs and pubs that tend to stay open later than their British counterparts, the DC night
life tends to be less reserved overall.

Both cities also share and differ in cultural diversity and cost of living. Both cities share a very
expensive cost of living—both in terms of housing and shopping. A downtown one-bedroom
apartment in DC can easily cost $1,800 per month, and a similar “flat” in London may double
that amount. These high costs create socioeconomic disparity among the residents. Although
both cities’ residents are predominantly wealthy, both have a significantly large population of
poor and homeless. Perhaps the most significant difference between the resident demographics
is the racial makeup. Washington, DC, is a “minority majority” city, which means the majority of
its citizens are races other than white. In 2009, according to the US Census, 55 percent of DC
residents were classified as “Black or African American” and 35 percent of its residents were
classified as “white.” London, by contrast, has very few minorities—in 2006, 70 percent of its
population was “white,” while only 10 percent was “black.” The racial demographic differences
between the cities is drastic.

Even though Washington, DC, and London are major capital cities of English-speaking countries
in the Western world, they have many differences along with their similarities. They have vastly
different histories, art cultures, and racial demographics, but they remain similar in their cost of
living and socioeconomic disparity.

Discussion Questions

1. How is the essay organized? Subject-by-subject? Point-by-point? How can you tell?
2. Find the thesis. How is it phrased to introduce comparison and contrast?
3. How are the two cities similar?
4. How are the two cities different?
5. Overall, is this essay emphasizing the similarities or the differences between the two
cities?
 COMPARE/CONTRAST | 155

Your Turn

Choose one of the following options:

Option 1

Brainstorm an essay that leans toward contrast. Choose one of the following three categories. Pick
two examples from each. Then come up with one similarity and three differences between the
examples.

1. Romantic comedies
2. Internet search engines
3. Cell phones

Option 2

Brainstorm an essay that leans toward comparison. Choose one of the following three items. Then
come up with one difference and three similarities.

1. Department stores and discount retail stores

2. Fast-food chains and fine dining restaurants
3. Dogs and cats

Key Terms

• Comparison
156 | COMPARE/CONTRAST

• Contrast
• Thesis
• Similarities
• Differences

Summary
• A compare-and-contrast essay analyzes two subjects by either comparing them, contrasting them, or
both.
The purpose of writing a comparison or contrast essay is not to state the obvious but rather to
illuminate subtle differences or unexpected similarities between two subjects.
• The thesis should clearly state the subjects that are to be compared, contrasted, or both, and it should
state what is to be learned from doing so.
• There are two main organizing strategies for compare-and-contrast essays.
• Organize by the subjects themselves, one then the other (subject-by-subject).
• Organize by individual points, in which you discuss each subject in relation to each point (point-by-
point).
• Use phrases of comparison or phrases of contrast to signal to readers how exactly the two subjects are
being analyzed.

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]
 COMPARE/CONTRAST | 157

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

Reflective Response

After you’ve completed this chapter, activity, and paper, do a bit of comparison and contrast with
this activity and assignment compared to the other rhetorical modes: how was this one different?
how was it similar?

Additional Chapter Sources

This chapter has been adapted and remixed by Will Rogers from the following textbooks and materials:
English Composition licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License;
[Link] licensed under CC BY-NC-SA:
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike; and You, Writing!, licensed under a Creative Commons
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0). This chapter is licensed
under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License; It can be
found at [Link] under this same license.

Compare/Contrast Copyright © 2022 by Will Rogers is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0
International License, except where otherwise noted.
158 | COMPARE/CONTRAST
 CHAPTER 10: EVALUATION | 159

CHAPTER 10: EVALUATION

160 | CHAPTER 10: EVALUATION
 EVALUATION | 161

EVALUATION
Will Rogers

Student Learning Outcomes

• Define judgments and criteria that are appropriate to the object of evaluation
• Evaluate using these judgments and criteria

Evaluation, Every Day

While some of us might struggle to define evaluation, we nevertheless use evaluation every day. Deciding on
what to buy, what to eat, what classes to take: all of these activities involve a process of evaluation. Our opinion
of these things takes into account all kinds of evidence, attitudes, and likes and dislikes.
So, in many ways, we will be familiar with the kind of paper that centers evaluation. The activities and
assignments we will cover in this chapter differ somewhat from those everyday evaluations. We probably
don’t have to make our judgments clear when we decide to eat cereal for dinner. Our thought processes and
rationales don’t have to be written down, and we don’t need to appear unbiased. Our dinner, our opinions.
If you’ve ever read an article about the latest iPhone that told you whether or not it was worth the money,
then you’ve read an evaluation essay. Other examples of evaluation essays are movie reviews, book reviews,
restaurant reviews, or car reviews. The point of all these examples is to make a judgment about the subject; is it
good or is it bad?
In this paper, and for this unit, we will see how these everyday evaluations become formal, as these papers
require explicitly stated judgments, clear criteria, and statements about counterarguments.
These characteristics and the skills necessary to produce them will also prove useful in the chapter focused
on Compare and Contrast.
162 | EVALUATION

The Purpose of Evaluative Writing

Writers evaluate arguments in order to present an informed and well-reasoned judgment about a subject. While
the evaluation will be based on their opinion, it should not seem opinionated. Instead, it should aim to be
reasonable and unbiased. This is achieved through developing a solid judgment, selecting appropriate criteria
to evaluate the subject, and providing clear evidence to support the criteria.
Evaluation is a type of writing that has many real-world applications. Anything can be evaluated. For
example, evaluations of movies, restaurants, books, and technology ourselves are all real-world evaluations. At
your job, your manager may write a year-end evaluation of your performance, or you may be the one writing
an evaluation of an employee, and these evaluations often impact your pay!
Evaluation is important because it is a bedrock and foundation for Compare-and-Contrast essays, which
require evaluations of two or more different objects, events, or people, to judge them together and against each
other.

The Structure of an Evaluation Essay

How do you structure an evaluation essay?

Subject

First, in an introduction, the essay will present the subject. What is being evaluated? Why? The essay begins
with the writer giving any details needed about the subject. For example, a restaurant review must at least
include the name and location of the restaurant. In an evaluation of a vehicle, you’d include the make, model,
and year of the vehicle. If the essay were a movie review, this is where you’d tell us the name of the movie and
give a little bit of background.
Even at this early stage, your evaluation of the subject can come into focus for your reader. Your word
choice—the adjectives and adverbs you use—can make your judgment clear even before you state your thesis.

Judgment

Next, the essay needs to provide a judgment about a subject. This is the thesis of the essay, and it states whether
the subject is good or bad based on how it meets the stated criteria. This is most often the very last sentence of
the introduction. Again, if this were a movie review, this might be where you state that you liked (or disliked)
the movie, and maybe a brief indication of why.
Don’t be afraid to take a strong stand! Don’t straddle the fence or water down your judgment. That means
 EVALUATION | 163

your thesis statement should not be a question. Your thesis should not offer up several different perspectives.
Instead, make a bold, direct statement. Be clear, concise, and direct. Tell us what you really think!

Criteria

An important first step in writing an evaluation is to consider the appropriate criteria for evaluating the
subject. Criteria are standards that we use when making a judgment.
If you were to evaluate a car, for example, you might consider the expected criteria: fuel economy, price, and
crash ratings. However, you could also consider more personal criteria: style, color, sound systems, or whether
it has Apple CarPlay. Even though not everyone will base their choice of a car on these secondary criteria, they
are still okay to use in your essay; in fact, they can make the essay more personalized and interesting.
Job applications and interviews are more examples of evaluations. Based on certain criteria, management
and hiring committees determine which applicants will be considered for an interview and which applicant
will be hired.
How do you decide what criteria to use? Start by making a list of commonly used standards for judging your
subject. If you do not know the standards usually used to evaluate your subject, you should start with some
research. For example, if you are reviewing a film, you could read a few recent film reviews on Rotten Tomatoes,
noting the standards that reviewers typically use and the reasons they give for liking or disliking a film. If you
are evaluating a football team, you could read reviews of football teams on ESPN, find a book on coaching
football, or talk to a football coach to learn about what makes a great (or not-so-great) football team.
You might mention your criteria in your introduction, or you might use the topic sentences of your body
paragraphs to clearly identify your criteria. Sticking with the movie review example, you might explain that
your criteria are the plot of the movie, the quality of the acting, and how well-made the movie is.

Evidence

The evidence of an evaluation essay consists of the supporting details authors provide based on their judgment
of the criteria.
For example, if the subject of an evaluation is a restaurant, a judgment could be “Kay’s Bistro provides an
unrivaled experience in fine dining.” Some authors evaluate fine dining restaurants by identifying appropriate
criteria in order to rate the establishment’s food quality, service, and atmosphere. For example, if the bread
served at the start of the meal was fresh out of the oven, then describing that fresh bread would be evidence in
evaluation of the restaurant; it would fall under the criterion of “food quality.”
Another example of evaluation is literary analysis; judgments may be made about a character in the story
based on the character’s actions, characteristics, and past history within the story. The scenes in the story are
evidence for why readers have a certain opinion of the character, so you might include text from the story
164 | EVALUATION

as evidence in your essay. You might also quote the published opinions of other writers who have already
evaluated this story.
In a movie review, for each of the criteria that you stated, you’d provide specific evidence from the movie.
Describe pivotal scenes that led to your judgment. For example, if a movie included a really emotional scene
that stuck with you long after you saw the movie, you could cite that as evidence of the quality of the acting.

Counterargument

Counterarguing means responding to readers’ objections and questions. To effectively counterargue, you
need to understand your audience. What does the audience already know? What do you think their opinions
are? Do you expect your audience to agree or disagree with you?
Why bother with counterargument? Effective counterarguing builds credibility in the mind of the reader
because it seems like you’re listening to their questions and concerns.
Typically, the best place for counterarguments is the end of the essay, after you’ve already made your points.
Think about what objections you expect your reader to have. You can respond to those objections in two
ways. The first option is to acknowledge an objection and immediately provide a counterargument, explaining
why the objection is not valid. Second, you can concede the point, basically admitting there is room for other
opinions. In either case, it is important to be respectful of opinions that are different from your own, while still
standing behind your thesis.
Below is an example of a movie review. Now that you understand that a movie review is an evaluation essay
that uses criteria and specific evidence to make a judgment on the subject, look for those criteria and evidence
as you read. Does this critic use the same criteria that you do when deciding whether you like a movie?

Professional Writing Example

‘The Batman’ Is the Batman Movie We Deserve

By Adam Nayman

The Batman is not the Batman movie we need. That’s because we didn’t need another Batman
movie. Not yet, anyway. Maybe if Christian Bale’s climactic self-sacrifice at the end of The Dark
Knight Rises had hit a little bit harder, without the winking, now-you-see-him-now-you-don’t
resurrection engineered by Christopher Nolan (still prestige-ing after all these years); maybe if
 EVALUATION | 165

we hadn’t had Ben Affleck glowering through various Snyder cuts like the human embodiment
of a contractual obligation.

The Batman is the Batman movie we deserve, though: overwrought and overlong, but also
carefully crafted and exhilarating. It’s just good enough to wish it were better—a lavish piece of
intellectual property that ultimately prices itself out of providing cheap thrills.

Directed by Matt Reeves, The Batman begins like an exploitation movie, with a voyeuristic,
quasi-Hitchcockian point-of-view shot seen through high-powered telescopic goggles—heavy
breathing on the soundtrack and a family in the crosshairs. Shades, definitely, of Dirty Harry and
its all-seeing sociopathic sniper, or maybe The Silence of the Lambs’ Buffalo Bill. As the
sequence goes on, stitching us in complicity into an act of surveillance and then cutting
stealthily into the home of Gotham’s embattled mayor (Rupert Penry-Jones), there’s a sense of
dread that feels new and strangely alien compared to other iterations of the franchise. Nolan’s
Dark Knight movies were grim and melodramatic and full of brutal, sadistic acts of violence, but
they were never scary. The actors were having too much fun, and the over-cranked
psychological intensity was subordinate to spectacle. Reeves, though, uses the visual
vocabulary of a slasher movie for all it’s worth. When the owner of the original POV shot
suddenly materializes in the shadows behind the mayor and dispatches him with a blunt
instrument to the head, the effect is genuinely unsettling. We don’t feel safe.

Paranoia is in Reeves’s wheelhouse; at his best, he’s a fluid, moody virtuoso. Think of the
excellent first half of Cloverfield, with its anxious first-person perspective on an impending
apocalypse. Or the terrifying car-crash scene in his remake of Let Me In, which unfolds with the
camera as a hapless backseat passenger, looking on unblinkingly as the world turns upside
down. Reeves isn’t above show-offy camerawork, but it’s less to impart his own sense of
control than to keep the audience off balance.

The tension, then, is between a filmmaker who specializes in disequilibrium tackling material
that’s almost ritualistically familiar. For the first 45 minutes, The Batman does a beautiful job of
giving us the beats that we expect, tricked up just enough to seem fresh. There’s a crime-
riddled Gotham crisscrossed by low-level mobsters; the title character smacking down street-
level hoods during his nightly rounds; and a police force resentful of the vigilante in their midst.
We’ve seen it all before, but not usually with such a patient, arresting sense of confidence.
When Robert Pattinson’s Batman stalks through the bloody crime scene at the mayor’s
apartment, staring down the cops lining his path, the effect is pure pulp friction—a kind of vivid,
scummy immediacy. And when Batman emerges from the shadows to pummel some face-
painted gangbangers, the bleak imagery evokes vintage Frank Miller.
166 | EVALUATION

Miller’s 1987 DC comics arc Batman: Year One is an obvious inspiration for Reeves and Peter
Craig’s screenplay, which makes it clear that Pattinson’s incarnation is still just experimenting
with his nocturnal alter ego. In this version, Batman is less authentically world-weary than
prematurely burned out—a nice Gen Z spin on the archetype. “Two years of nights,” he
grumbles in voice-over sounding (purposefully) like Taxi Driver’s Travis Bickle or the Rorschach
of Alan Moore’s 1986 graphic novel Watchmen. Miller’s vision of a Gotham City buckling under
Reagan-era anxieties—nuclear proliferation, inner-city crime, encroaching spiritual
malaise—remains deeply influential, even after Tim Burton’s gothic, expressionist Gotham.
While Reeves’s style and color palette are different from Nolan’s, he’s equally interested in the
Miller-derived idea of the city as psychic protagonist, with lots of earnest monologuing about
whether such a corroded urban landscape is worth saving, or if a self-styled crime fighter is just
wasting his time.

Once it’s clear that we’re going to be spared yet another version of Batman’s origin story—no
flashbacks to his parents getting shot outside the opera or close-ups of a moony, grieving little
Bruce Wayne—the novelty of watching a relatively fledgling superhero earning his wings kicks
in. There’s probably less of Bruce Wayne in The Batman than any other movie version, and so
the usual trick of having the star play up the differences between the two personas doesn’t
apply. Pattinson’s skill at playing awkward, antisocial characters works well for a vigilante who
cloaks himself in solitude and isn’t interested in making friends (except for Jeffrey Wright’s
nicely soulful James Gordon, imagined here as a principled wingman rather than a head honcho).
That said, it’s not like there are any galas or fundraisers for Bruce to attend anyway. The only
time he’s called on to appear in public is at the mayor’s funeral, which ends up turning into a
murder scene as well at the whim of the masked killer whose sporadic appearances drive the
story and punctuate it with a series of question marks.

It’s telling that Reeves went with the Riddler as the main bad guy for his first crack at the
Batman universe. For one thing, it’s not like Paul Dano has to compete with a universally
acclaimed movie take on the role. (Almost 30 years later, we still cannot sanction Jim Carrey’s
buffoonery in Batman Forever.) For another, the character’s enigmatic shtick is easily torqued
into the kind of taunting, Zodiac-style cryptography that Reeves is using as a visual motif. (The
Fincher comparisons also extend to Se7en, right down to the Riddler collecting his scribblings in
a series of unmarked notebooks; the line between theft and homage remains razor-thin.) Dano,
who’s usually cast as a punching bag, is impressively creepy in small doses, and disappears for
long stretches that leave us wanting more.

The complexity of The Batman’s narrative is both a bug and a feature. Reeves is going for
 EVALUATION | 167

something sprawling, and there are subplots for Zoë Kravitz as a subtly feline, cat-burglarizing
Selina Kyle and Colin Farrell as a mobbed-up, battle-scarred, humorously ineffectual Penguin.
(As usual, Farrell is at his best when playing against his leading-man looks; his middle-aged
transformation into a master character actor is something to behold.) They both work for suave
crime boss Carmine Falcone (John Turturro), who’s got the cops in his pocket and a nebulous
connection to the late Thomas Wayne, imagined here as a good-hearted but hardly flawless
father and magnate with skeletons in his walk-in closet. The big through line is the idea that
the Riddler’s victims are all connected to some dark, heartbreaking civic secret, one that also
implicates the Wayne family, and the clues are parceled out judiciously, with enough mystery
and flourish to suggest that the revelation will be worth the wait.

Sadly, it isn’t—not quite, and definitely not after more than two hours of portentous buildup
involving loaded references to rats, moles, and other nocturnal animals. It’s bizarre how closely
Reeves and Craig bump up against a potentially audacious twist without pulling the trigger; the
way the story is shaped, it seems like Dano’s and Pattinson’s characters are supposed to be
secret siblings as opposed to two different case studies in forlorn orphan psychology. The
theme of duality between Batman and his foes—already stomped into the ground by Nolan,
Burton, and pretty much everyone else who’s had a crack at the character—rears its head here,
but not as disturbingly as the filmmakers seem to think. A big, late confrontation between
Pattinson and Dano strives for the sociopathic chill of Se7en but feels lukewarm, as does the
revelation that one of the film’s characters has been gradually amassing an army of similarly
aggrieved, incel-style acolytes—the same idea that Todd Philips already (and more effectively)
evoked in Joker.

The bigger problem is that having finally unraveled every tightly wound strand of its narrative,
The Batman takes an exhausting swing at apocalyptic grandeur. For all the expectations that
Reeves is trying to subvert or at least play with, he’s as susceptible to the lure of blockbuster-
sized spectacle as Burton or Nolan. The carnage is well-staged on a technical level, but it’s
weirdly desultory, even as it pushes topical hot buttons around the idea of armed, civic
insurrection. Based on shooting dates, The Batman’s striking evocations of January 6 must be
coincidental, but either way, it feels like Reeves and his collaborators are trying to capitalize on a
melancholy, disenfranchised zeitgeist more than actually saying anything about it.

As for what they’re saying about Batman—that it’s a lousy, lonely job, but somebody’s gotta do
it—suffice it to say that it’s all been said before. One reason that Michael Keaton’s interpretation
of Bruce Wayne holds up is that he was able to retain a sense of ridiculousness; Pattinson’s a
terrific actor and his gaunt jaw line and bruised, battered body language are striking, but he’s
168 | EVALUATION

acting in such a narrow emotional range that, for the first time after a killer run of
performances, he grows monotonous (especially when no-selling Kravitz’s come-ons). A
Batman who listens to MTV Unplugged in New York on repeat is a perfectly OK idea in theory,
but there’s Something in the Way that Reeves piles on signifiers of tragic alienation that just
feels pretentious. It’s the same mock gravitas as when he used “The Weight” to score a
moment of lyrical down time during Dawn of the Planet of the Apes, as if trying to channel the
ghost of Easy Rider into a story about mutated chimpanzees firing guns on horseback.

“Vengeance won’t change the past,” Bruce Wayne observes late in The Batman. “People need
hope.” There are worse thesis statements to base a movie around. But there’s also something
disingenuous about a movie that drenches itself in unpleasantness before trying in the end to
peddle uplift and recast the title character as a kind of humanitarian activist. Ultimately, this
Batman accepts the thankless, death-defying role he’s stepped into, and the sacrifices that go
with it. But that choice would be more compelling if it weren’t framed as a tacit
acknowledgement of all the inevitable sequels to come—whether we need them or not.

Discussion Questions

1. How does the essay serve as an evaluation essay? In other words, what judgment is it
making?
2. What are the criteria Nayman uses to judge Batman as a franchise? What criteria does he
use to judge the newest Batman movie?
3. How does Nayman address counterarguments?
4. What kinds of evidence does he use and from what sources?
5. Whether or not you’ve seen The Batman, do you agree with Nayman’s judgment about
the movie? Explain your answer.
 EVALUATION | 169

Student Writing Example

Sample Essay

Gender differences and biases have been a part of the normal lives of humans ever since
anyone can remember. Anthropological evidence has revealed that even the humans and the
hominids of ancient times had separate roles for men and women in their societies, and this
relates to the concepts of epistemology. There were certain things that women were forbidden
to do and similarly men could not partake in some of the activities that were traditionally
reserved for women. This has given birth to the gender role stereotypes that we find today.
These differences have been passed on to our current times; although many differences occur
now that have caused a lot of debate amongst the people as to their appropriateness and have
made it possible for us to have a stereotyping threat by which we sometimes assign certain
qualities to certain people without thinking. For example, many men are blamed for
undermining women and stereotyping them for traditional roles, and this could be said to be
the same for men; men are also stereotyped in many of their roles. This leads to social
constructionism since the reality is not always depicted by what we see by our eyes. These
ideas have also carried on in the world of advertising and the differences shown between the
males and the females are apparent in many advertisements we see today. This can have some
serious impacts on the society as people begin to stereotype the gender roles in reality.

There has been a lot of attention given to the portrayal of gender in advertising by both
practitioners as well as academics and much of this has been done regarding the portrayal of
women in advertising (Ferguson, Kreshel, & Tinkham 40-51; Bellizzi & Milner 71-79). This has led
many to believe that most of the advertisements and their contents are sexist in nature. It has
been noted by viewing various ads that women are shown as being more concerned about
their beauty and figure rather than being shown as authority figures in the ads; they are usually
shown as the product users. Also, there is a tendency in many countries, including the United
States, to portray women as being subordinate to men, as alluring sex objects, or as decorative
objects. This is not right as it portrays women as the weaker sex, being only good as objects.

At the same time, many of the ads do not show gender biases in the pictures or the graphics,
but some bias does turn up in the language of the ad. “Within language, bias is more evident in
songs and dialogue than in formal speech or when popular culture is involved. For example, bias
sneaks in through the use of idiomatic expressions (man’s best friend) and when the language
170 | EVALUATION

refer to characters that depict traditional sex roles. One’s normative interpretation of these
results depends on one’s ideological perspective and tolerance for the pace of change. It is
encouraging that the limited study of language in advertising indicates that the use of gender-
neutrality is commonplace. Advertisers can still reduce the stereotyping in ad pictures, and
increase the amount of female speech relative to male speech, even though progress is
evidenced. To the extent that advertisers prefer to speak to people in their own language, the
bias present in popular culture will likely continue to be reflected in advertisements” (Artz et al
20).

Advertisements are greatly responsible for eliciting such views for the people of our society.
The children also see these pictures and they are also the ones who create stereotypes in their
minds about the different roles of men and women. All these facts combine to give result to the
different public opinion that becomes fact for many of the members of the society. Their
opinion and views are based more on the interpretation they conclude from the images that are
projected in the media than by their observations of the males and females in real life. This
continues in a vicious circle as the media tries to pick up and project what the society thinks and
the people in the society make their opinions based upon the images shown by the media.
People, therefore, should not base too much importance about how the media is trying to
portray the members of the society; rather they should base their opinions on their own
observation of how people interact together in the real world.

Works Cited

Artz, N., Munger, J., and Purdy, W., “Gender Issues in Advertising Language,” Women and
Language, 22, (2), 1999.

Bellizzi, J. A., & Milner, L. “Gender positioning of a traditionally male-dominant product,” Journal
of Advertising Research, 31(3), 1991.

Ferguson, J. H., Kreshel, P. J., & Tinkham, S. F. “In the pages of Ms.: Sex role portrayals of women
in advertising,” Journal of Advertising, 19 (1), 1990.

Discussion Questions

1. What is the topic or phenomenon being evaluated in the example essay above?
2. What are the criteria for evaluating it?
 EVALUATION | 171

3. Look for examples of opinion or bias—where are they?

4. What kinds of evidence does this essay use?
5. Do you find yourself agreeing or disagreeing with the writer’s judgment? Explain.

Your Turn

1. Evaluate a restaurant. What do you expect in a good restaurant? What criteria determine
whether a restaurant is good?
2. List three criteria that you will use to evaluate a restaurant. Then dine there. Afterward,
explain whether or not the restaurant meets each criterion, and include evidence (qualities
from the restaurant) that backs your evaluation.
3. Give the restaurant a star rating (5 Stars: Excellent, 4 Stars: Very Good, 3 Stars: Good, 2 Stars:
Fair, 1 Star: Poor). Explain why the restaurant earned this star rating.

Key Terms

• Judgment
• Opinion
• Bias
• Evidence
• Criteria
• Counterarguing
172 | EVALUATION

Summary
While we surely evaluate things and activities every day, now we can see how our judgment of something based
on criteria and supported by evidence can create an essay that does more than simply review but analyzes and
evaluates in a way that avoids bias and unsupported opinion.

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

Reflective Response

How would you evaluate your own progress in completing these readings and assignments that
focus on evaluation—what could you have done differently?
 EVALUATION | 173

Sources
This chapter has been adapted and remixed by Will Rogers from the following textbooks and materials: English
Composition licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License and OER material
from Susan Wood, “Evaluation Essay,” Leeward CC ENG 100 OER, licensed under the Creative Commons
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License. This chapter is licensed under a Creative
Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License.
“‘The Batman’ is the Batman Movie We Deserve” by Adam Nayman appeared online in The Ringer on
March 8, 2022. All rights reserved. Used under Fair Use.

Evaluation Copyright © 2022 by Will Rogers is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License,
except where otherwise noted.
174 | EVALUATION
 CHAPTER 11: CAUSE AND EFFECT | 175

CHAPTER 11: CAUSE AND EFFECT

176 | CHAPTER 11: CAUSE AND EFFECT
 CAUSE AND EFFECT | 177

CAUSE AND EFFECT

Wanda M. Waller

Student Learning Outcomes

• Identify causes and effects (cause-and-effect relationships of various events, decisions, or

conditions)
• Apply an effective arrangement of introduction, body, and conclusion for a cause-and-effect
essay
• Create a cause-and-effect essay

Introduction to Cause and Effect

What is Cause and Effect?

The cause-and-effect essay is a form of argumentation that details the reasons for (causes) and the outcomes
of (effects) an event, condition, or decision. The purpose of the cause-and-effect essay is to determine how
various phenomena relate. This essay is an attempt to discover either the origins of something, such as an event
or a decision, the effects or results that can be properly attributed to it, or both. Sometimes the connection
between cause and effect is clear, but often, determining the exact relationship between the two is challenging.
For example, a single cause can produce many different effects, or a single effect may have several causes. A
cause-effect essay can do one of two things:

• It can analyze the ways in which one or more effects result from a particular cause.
• It can analyze the ways in which one or more causes lead to a particular effect.

In other words, your essay may focus more on the effects of a cause or more on the causes of one effect. Either
178 | CAUSE AND EFFECT

approach provides a useful means of discussing the possible relationship between the two events. However, in
cause-effect essays, it is easy to suggest that because one event preceded another event, the former event caused
the latter. Simply because one event follows another one sequentially does not mean that the two actions
are related. Similar to argumentation (see the chapter on Argument), the cause-and-effect essay attempts to
advance knowledge and ideas with reason and support.

What Is Cause and Effect?

Watch the following video on “Homelessness in America” to share your thoughts on possible causes and
effects. (You can also watch it directly on YouTube.) Closed captioning is available and can be enabled using
the player controls.

One or more interactive elements has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view
them online here: [Link]

Self-Assessment

What causes are discussed in the video link? What effects?

Identify other causes and effects of homelessness in America.

Structure of a Cause-and-Effect Essay

Organization

The cause-and-effect essay can be organized in one of the following two primary ways:

• Start with the cause and then talk about the effects.
• Start with the effect and then talk about the causes.

Introduction

The cause-and-effect essay opens with an introduction that provides appropriate background to inform the
 CAUSE AND EFFECT | 179

reader about the topic and establish a clear purpose for exploring the causes and effects. Include information
on why your topic is significant, who or what it involves, and where, when, or how often the situation occurs.
The introduction includes the thesis statement that states the main cause, main effect, or various causes and
effects of a condition or event.

Thesis Statement

The thesis statement explains the main idea of the essay, whether the essay will focus on causes, effects, or both.
Your thesis statement can highlight a single cause-and-effect relationship, or it can also show how one event
causes multiple effects. You can also explore how a phenomenon has multiple causes.

Body Paragraphs and Supporting Details

Each body paragraph begins with a topic sentence that indicates which cause or effect the paragraph will
discuss. Every paragraph explores a different facet of the relationship between the topic and its causes or effects.
Link the causes and effects by providing evidence and explaining why the cause or effect has a relationship
to the main topic. Include examples, experiences, or personal knowledge to convince your reader that certain
causes or effects are creditable. The following words and phrases will assist in linking ideas, moving your essay
forward, and improving readability:

Words That Link and Advance Ideas

Because Since Affects

As a result Therefore Results in

Due to Hence Leads to

Consequently Thus Accordingly

Conclusion

The conclusion reinforces the thesis by summarizing the most significant causes or effects from the body
paragraphs. It reminds the reader why the topic is important by emphasizing the connections discussed in the
cause-effect relationship. Avoid introducing new causes or effects in your conclusion.
180 | CAUSE AND EFFECT

Writing a Cause-and-Effect Essay

Choose an event or condition that you think has an interesting cause-and-effect relationship. Introduce your
topic in an engaging way. End your introduction with a thesis that states the main cause, the main effect, or
both.
Organize your essay by starting with either the cause-then-effect structure or the effect-then-cause structure.
Within each section, you should clearly explain and support the causes and effects using a full range of
evidence. Contributory causes, for example, are secondary circumstances that produce actions, events, or
conditions. However, contributory causes alone cannot cause the action, event, or condition to occur. If you
are writing about multiple causes or multiple effects, you may choose to sequence either in terms of order of
importance. In other words, order the causes from least to most important (or vice versa), or order the effects
from least important to most important (or vice versa).
Use the phrases of causation when trying to forge connections between various events or conditions. This
will help organize your ideas and orient the reader. End your essay with a conclusion that summarizes your
main points and reinforces your thesis.

Professional Writing Example: “Misinformation and Biases

Infect Social Media, Both Intentionally and Accidentally”
Giovanni Luca Ciampaglia and Filippo Menczer
Giovanni Luca Ciampaglia is an Assistant Professor, Department of Computer Science and Engineering,
University of South Florida. Filippo Menczer is a Professor of Computer Science and Informatics and the
Director of the Center for Complex Networks and Systems Research at Indiana University. This article
originally appeared in The Conversation.

Misinformation and Biases Infect Social Media, Both Intentionally

and Accidentally

Social media are among the primary sources of news in the U.S. and across the world. Yet users
are exposed to content of questionable accuracy, including conspiracy theories, clickbait,
hyperpartisan content, pseudoscience, and even fabricated “fake news” reports.

It’s not surprising that there’s so much disinformation published: Spam and online fraud are
lucrative for criminals, and government and political propaganda yield both partisan and
 CAUSE AND EFFECT | 181

financial benefits. But the fact that low-credibility content spreads so quickly and easily
suggests that people and the algorithms behind social media platforms are vulnerable to
manipulation.

Explaining the tools developed at the Observatory on Social Media.

Our research has identified three types of bias that make the social media ecosystem vulnerable
to both intentional and accidental misinformation. That is why our Observatory on Social Media
at Indiana University is building tools to help people become aware of these biases and protect
themselves from outside influences designed to exploit them.

Bias in the brain

Cognitive biases originate in the way the brain processes the information that every person
encounters every day. The brain can deal with only a finite amount of information, and too
many incoming stimuli can cause information overload. That in itself has serious implications for
the quality of information on social media. We have found that steep competition for users’
limited attention means that some ideas go viral despite their low quality—even when people
prefer to share high-quality content.

To avoid getting overwhelmed, the brain uses a number of tricks. These methods are usually
effective, but may also become biases when applied in the wrong contexts.

One cognitive shortcut happens when a person is deciding whether to share a story that
appears on their social media feed. People are very affected by the emotional connotations of a
headline, even though that’s not a good indicator of an article’s accuracy. Much more important
is who wrote the piece.

To counter this bias, and help people pay more attention to the source of a claim before sharing
it, we developed Fakey, a mobile news literacy game simulating a typical social media news
feed, with a mix of news articles from mainstream and low-credibility sources. Players get more
points for sharing news from reliable sources and flagging suspicious content for fact-checking.
In the process, they learn to recognize signals of source credibility, such as hyperpartisan claims
and emotionally charged headlines.

Bias in society

Another source of bias comes from society. When people connect directly with their peers, the
social biases that guide their selection of friends come to influence the information they see.
182 | CAUSE AND EFFECT

In fact, in our research we have found that it is possible to determine the political leanings of a
Twitter user by simply looking at the partisan preferences of their friends. Our analysis of the
structure of these partisan communication networks found social networks are particularly
efficient at disseminating information—accurate or not—when they are closely tied together
and disconnected from other parts of society.

The tendency to evaluate information more favorably if it comes from within their own social
circles creates “echo chambers” that are ripe for manipulation, either consciously or
unintentionally. This helps explain why so many online conversations devolve into “us versus
them” confrontations.

To study how the structure of online social networks makes users vulnerable to disinformation,
we built Hoaxy, a system that tracks and visualizes the spread of content from low-credibility
sources, and how it competes with fact-checking content. Our analysis of the data collected by
Hoaxy during the 2016 U.S. presidential elections shows that Twitter accounts that shared
misinformation were almost completely cut off from the corrections made by the fact-checkers.

When we drilled down on the misinformation-spreading accounts, we found a very dense core
group of accounts retweeting each other almost exclusively—including several bots. The only
times that fact-checking organizations were ever quoted or mentioned by the users in the
misinformed group were when questioning their legitimacy or claiming the opposite of what
they wrote.

Bias in the machine

The third group of biases arises directly from the algorithms used to determine what people see
online. Both social media platforms and search engines employ them. These personalization
technologies are designed to select only the most engaging and relevant content for each
individual user. But in doing so, it may end up reinforcing the cognitive and social biases of
users, thus making them even more vulnerable to manipulation.

For instance, the detailed advertising tools built into many social media platforms let
disinformation campaigners exploit confirmation bias by tailoring messages to people who are
already inclined to believe them.

Also, if a user often clicks on Facebook links from a particular news source, Facebook will tend
to show that person more of that site’s content. This so-called “filter bubble” effect may isolate
people from diverse perspectives, strengthening confirmation bias.

Our own research shows that social media platforms expose users to a less diverse set of
 CAUSE AND EFFECT | 183

sources than do non-social media sites like Wikipedia. Because this is at the level of a whole
platform, not of a single user, we call this the homogeneity bias.

Another important ingredient of social media is information that is trending on the platform,
according to what is getting the most clicks. We call this popularity bias, because we have
found that an algorithm designed to promote popular content may negatively affect the overall
quality of information on the platform. This also feeds into existing cognitive bias, reinforcing
what appears to be popular irrespective of its quality.

All these algorithmic biases can be manipulated by social bots, computer programs that interact
with humans through social media accounts. Most social bots, like Twitter’s Big Ben, are
harmless. However, some conceal their real nature and are used for malicious intents, such as
boosting disinformation or falsely creating the appearance of a grassroots movement, also
called “astroturfing.” We found evidence of this type of manipulation in the run-up to the 2010
U.S. midterm election.

To study these manipulation strategies, we developed a tool to detect social bots called
Botometer. Botometer uses machine learning to detect bot accounts, by inspecting thousands
of different features of Twitter accounts, like the times of its posts, how often it tweets, and the
accounts it follows and retweets. It is not perfect, but it has revealed that as many as 15 percent
of Twitter accounts show signs of being bots.

Using Botometer in conjunction with Hoaxy, we analyzed the core of the misinformation
network during the 2016 U.S. presidential campaign. We found many bots exploiting both the
cognitive, confirmation and popularity biases of their victims and Twitter’s algorithmic biases.

These bots are able to construct filter bubbles around vulnerable users, feeding them false
claims and misinformation. First, they can attract the attention of human users who support a
particular candidate by tweeting that candidate’s hashtags or by mentioning and retweeting
the person. Then the bots can amplify false claims smearing opponents by retweeting articles
from low-credibility sources that match certain keywords. This activity also makes the algorithm
highlight for other users false stories that are being shared widely.

Understanding complex vulnerabilities

Even as our research, and others’, shows how individuals, institutions and even entire societies
can be manipulated on social media, there are many questions left to answer. It’s especially
important to discover how these different biases interact with each other, potentially creating
more complex vulnerabilities.
184 | CAUSE AND EFFECT

Tools like ours offer internet users more information about disinformation, and therefore some
degree of protection from its harms. The solutions will not likely be only technological, though
there will probably be some technical aspects to them. But they must take into account the
cognitive and social aspects of the problem.

Editor’s note: This article was updated on Jan. 10, 2019, to replace a link to a study that had been
retracted. The text of the article is still accurate, and remains unchanged.

Misinformation and Biases Infect Social Media, Both Intentionally and Accidentally by Giovanni
Luca Ciampaglia and Filippo Menczer is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-
NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

Discussion Questions

1. What are the major causes that make social media vulnerable to misinformation?
2. What are the major effects?
3. Do the examples used in the essay show a causal relationship to the topic? Explain your
answers using specific details from the essay.
4. Are the examples used in the essay convincing or persuasive? Explain.
5. Do the authors expose new ideas or knowledge on this topic? Explain why or why not.

Student Writing Example

Effects of Video Game Addiction

Video game addiction is a serious problem in many parts of the world today and deserves more
attention. It is no secret that children and adults in many countries throughout the world,
including Japan, China, and the United States, play video games every day. Most players are able
to limit their usage in ways that do not interfere with their daily lives, but many others have
developed an addiction to playing video games and suffer detrimental effects.

An addiction can be described in several ways, but generally speaking, addictions involve
 CAUSE AND EFFECT | 185

unhealthy attractions to substances or activities that ultimately disrupt the ability of a person to
keep up with regular daily responsibilities. Video game addiction typically involves playing
games uncontrollably for many hours at a time—some people will play only four hours at a time
while others cannot stop for over twenty-four hours.

Regardless of the severity of the addiction, many of the same effects will be experienced by all.

One common effect of video game addiction is isolation and withdrawal from social
experiences. Video game players often hide in their homes or in Internet cafés for days at a
time—only reemerging for the most pressing tasks and necessities. The effect of this isolation
can lead to a breakdown of communication skills and often a loss in socialization. While it is true
that many games, especially massive multiplayer online games, involve a very real form of e-
based communication and coordination with others, and these virtual interactions often result
in real communities that can be healthy for the players, these communities and forms of
communication rarely translate to the types of valuable social interaction that humans need to
maintain typical social functioning. As a result, the social networking in these online games
often gives the users the impression that they are interacting socially, while their true social
lives and personal relations may suffer.

Another unfortunate product of the isolation that often accompanies video game addiction is
the disruption of the user’s career. While many players manage to enjoy video games and still
hold their jobs without problems, others experience challenges at their workplace. Some may
only experience warnings or demerits as a result of poorer performance, or others may end up
losing their jobs altogether. Playing video games for extended periods of time often involves
sleep deprivation, and this tends to carry over to the workplace, reducing production and
causing habitual tardiness.

Video game addiction may result in a decline in overall health and hygiene. Players who interact
with video games for such significant amounts of time can go an entire day without eating and
even longer without basic hygiene tasks, such as using the restroom or bathing. The effects of
this behavior pose significant danger to their overall health.

The causes of video game addiction are complex and can vary greatly, but the effects have the
potential to be severe. Playing video games can and should be a fun activity for all to enjoy. But
just like everything else, the amount of time one spends playing video games needs to be
balanced with personal and social responsibilities.
186 | CAUSE AND EFFECT

Discussion Questions

1. What are the major causes discussed in this essay?

2. What are the major effects?
3. Do the examples used in the essay show a causal relationship to the topic? Explain your
answer using specific details from the essay.
4. Are the examples used in the essay convincing or persuasive? Explain.
5. Does the writer expose new ideas or knowledge on this topic? Why or why not?

Your Turn

What societal or personal issues/experiences have you observed and considered possible causes or
effects?

What organizational structure would be best for the topic you are considering?

What is the relationship between your causes and effects?

Key Terms

• Cause
• Contributory causes
• Effect
 CAUSE AND EFFECT | 187

• Main cause

Summary
• The purpose of the cause-and-effect essay is to determine how various phenomena are related.
• The thesis states what the writer sees as the main cause, main effect, or various causes and effects of a
condition or event.
• The cause-and-effect essay can be organized in one of these two primary ways:
• Start with the cause and then talk about the effect.
• Start with the effect and then talk about the cause.
• Strong evidence is particularly important in the cause-and-effect essay due to the complexity of
determining connections between phenomena.
• Phrases of causation are helpful in signaling links between various elements in the essay.

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]
188 | CAUSE AND EFFECT

Reflective Response

Reflect on your writing process for the cause-and-effect essay. What was the most challenging?
What was the easiest?

Additional Chapter Sources

“The 10 Most Homeless Cities in America” by Nicholas Johnson was posted on YouTube on March 20, 2020.
Licensed under a YouTube standard license.
“Misinformation and Biases Infect Social Media, Both Intentionally and Accidentally” by Giovanni Luca
Ciampaglia and Filippo Menczer is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivatives 4.0
International License.

Cause and Effect Copyright © 2022 by Wanda M. Waller is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
4.0 International License, except where otherwise noted.
 CHAPTER 12: ARGUMENT | 189

CHAPTER 12: ARGUMENT

190 | CHAPTER 12: ARGUMENT
 ARGUMENT | 191

ARGUMENT
Wanda M. Waller

Student Learning Outcomes

• Identify the elements of an argumentative essay

• Create the structure of an argumentative essay
• Develop an argumentative essay

What Is Argumentation?
Arguments are everywhere, and practically everything is or has been debated at some time. Your ability
to develop a point of view on a topic and provide evidence is the process known as Argumentation.
Argumentation asserts the reasonableness of a debatable position, belief, or conclusion. This process teaches us
how to evaluate conflicting claims and judge evidence and methods of investigation while helping us to clarify
our thoughts and articulate them accurately. Arguments also consider the ideas of others in a respectful and
critical manner. In argumentative writing, you are typically asked to take a position on an issue or topic and
explain and support your position. The purpose of the argument essay is to establish the writer’s opinion or
position on a topic and persuade others to share or at least acknowledge the validity of your opinion.

Structure of the Argumentative Essay

An effective argumentative essay introduces a compelling, debatable topic to engage the reader. In an effort to
persuade others to share your opinion, the writer should explain and consider all sides of an issue fairly and
address counterarguments or opposing perspectives. The following five features make up the structure of an
argumentative essay:
192 | ARGUMENT

Introduction

The argumentative essay begins with an introduction that provides appropriate background to inform the
reader about the topic. Your introduction may start with a quote, a personal story, a surprising statistic, or
an interesting question. This strategy engages the reader’s attention while introducing the topic of the essay.
The background information is a short description of your topic. In this section, you should include any
information that your reader needs to understand your topic.

Thesis Statement

A thesis statement is one sentence in your introductory paragraph that concisely summarizes your main
point(s) and claim(s) and presents your position on the topic. The thesis statement or main claim must be
debatable. In other words, the thesis must be something that people could reasonably have differing opinions
on.

Body Paragraphs and Supporting Details

Your argument must use an organizational structure that is logical and persuasive. There are three types of
argumentative essays, each with differing organizational structures: Classical, Toulmin, and Rogerian.

Organization of the Classical Argument

The Classical Argument was developed by a Greek philosopher, Aristotle. It is the most common. The goal of
this model is to convince the reader about a particular point of view. The Classical Argument relies on appeals
to persuade an audience specifically: ethos (ethical appeal) is an appeal to the writer’s creditability, logos (logical
appeal) is an appeal based on logic, and pathos (pathetic appeal) is an appeal based on emotions. The structure
of the classical model is as follows:

• Introductory paragraph includes the thesis statement

• Background on the topic provides information to the reader about the topic
• Supporting evidence integrates appeals
• Counterargument and rebuttal address major opposition
• Conclusion restates the thesis statement

Organization of the Toulmin Argument

The Toulmin Argument was developed by Stephen Toulmin. The Toulmin method works well when there
 ARGUMENT | 193

are no clear truths or solutions to a problem. It considers the complex nature of most situations. There are six
basic components:

• Introduction—thesis statement or the main claim (statement of opinion)

• Grounds—the facts, data, or reasoning on which the claim is based
• Warrant—logic and reasoning that connect the ground to the claim
• Backing—additional support for the claim that addresses different questions related to the claim
• Qualifier—expressed limits to the claim stating the claim may not be true in all situations
• Rebuttal—counterargument against the claim

Organization of the Rogerian Argument

The Rogerian Argument was developed by Carl Rogers. Rogerian argument is a negotiating strategy in
which common goals are identified and opposing views are described as objectively as possible in an effort
to establish common ground and reach an agreement. Whereas the traditional argument focuses on winning,
the Rogerian model seeks a mutually satisfactory solution. This argument considers different standpoints and
works on collaboration and cooperation. Following is the structure of the Rogerian model:

• Introduction and Thesis Statement—presents the topic as a problem to solve together, rather than an
issue
• Opposing Position—expressed acknowledgment of counterargument that is fair and accurate
• Statement of Claim—writer’s perspective
• Middle Ground—discussion of a compromised solution
• Conclusion—remarks stating the benefits of a compromised solution

The Following Words and Phrases: Writing an Argument

Using transition words or phrases at the beginning of new paragraphs or within paragraphs helps a reader
to follow your writing. Transitions show the reader when you are moving on to a different idea or further
developing the same idea. Transitions create a flow, or connection, among all sentences, and that leads to
coherence in your writing. The following words and phrases will assist in linking ideas, moving your essay
forward, and improving readability:

• Also, in the same way, just as, likewise, similarly

• But, however, in spite of, on the one hand, on the other hand, nevertheless, nonetheless,
notwithstanding, in contrast, on the contrary, still yet
• First, second, third…, next, then, finally
194 | ARGUMENT

• After, afterward, at last, before, currently, during, earlier, immediately, later, meanwhile, now, recently,
simultaneously, subsequently, then
• For example, for instance, namely, specifically, to illustrate
• Even, indeed, in fact, of course, truly, without question, clearly
• Above, adjacent, below, beyond, here, in front, in back, nearby, there
• Accordingly, consequently, hence, so, therefore, thus
• Additionally, again, also, and, as well, besides, equally important, further, furthermore, in addition,
moreover, then
• Finally, in a word, in brief, briefly, in conclusion, in the end, in the final analysis, on the whole, thus, to
conclude, to summarize, in sum, to sum up, in summary

Professional Writing Example

The following essay, “Universal Health Care Coverage for the United States,” by Scott McLean is an
argumentative essay. As you read the essay, determine the author’s major claim and major supporting examples
that support his claim.

Universal Health Care Coverage for the United States

By Scott McLean

The United States is the only modernized Western nation that does not offer publicly funded
health care to all its citizens; the costs of health care for the uninsured in the United States are
prohibitive, and the practices of insurance companies are often more interested in profit margins
than providing health care. These conditions are incompatible with US ideals and standards, and
it is time for the US government to provide universal health care coverage for all its citizens. Like
education, health care should be considered a fundamental right of all US citizens, not simply a
privilege for the upper and middle classes.

One of the most common arguments against providing universal health care coverage (UHC) is
that it will cost too much money. In other words, UHC would raise taxes too much. While
providing health care for all US citizens would cost a lot of money for every tax-paying citizen,
citizens need to examine exactly how much money it would cost, and more important, how
much money is “too much” when it comes to opening up health care for all. Those who have
health insurance already pay too much money, and those without coverage are charged
 ARGUMENT | 195

unfathomable amounts. The cost of publicly funded health care versus the cost of current
insurance premiums is unclear. In fact, some Americans, especially those in lower income
brackets, could stand to pay less than their current premiums.

However, even if UHC would cost Americans a bit more money each year, we ought to reflect
on what type of country we would like to live in, and what types of morals we represent if we
are more willing to deny health care to others on the basis of saving a couple hundred dollars
per year. In a system that privileges capitalism and rugged individualism, little room remains for
compassion and love. It is time that Americans realize the amorality of US hospitals forced to
turn away the sick and poor. UHC is a health care system that aligns more closely with the core
values that so many Americans espouse and respect, and it is time to realize its potential.

Another common argument against UHC in the United States is that other comparable national
health care systems, like that of England, France, or Canada, are bankrupt or rife with problems.
UHC opponents claim that sick patients in these countries often wait in long lines or long wait
lists for basic health care. Opponents also commonly accuse these systems of being unable to
pay for themselves, racking up huge deficits year after year. A fair amount of truth lies in these
claims, but Americans must remember to put those problems in context with the problems of
the current US system as well. It is true that people often wait to see a doctor in countries with
UHC, but we in the United States wait as well, and we often schedule appointments weeks in
advance, only to have onerous waits in the doctor’s “waiting rooms.”

Critical and urgent care abroad is always treated urgently, much the same as it is treated in the
United States. The main difference there, however, is cost. Even health insurance policy holders
are not safe from the costs of health care in the United States. Each day an American acquires a
form of cancer, and the only effective treatment might be considered “experimental” by an
insurance company and thus is not covered. Without medical coverage, the patient must pay
for the treatment out of pocket. But these costs may be so prohibitive that the patient will
either opt for a less effective, but covered, treatment; opt for no treatment at all; or attempt to
pay the costs of treatment and experience unimaginable financial consequences. Medical bills in
these cases can easily rise into the hundreds of thousands of dollars, which is enough to force
even wealthy families out of their homes and into perpetual debt. Even though each American
could someday face this unfortunate situation, many still choose to take the financial risk.
Instead of gambling with health and financial welfare, US citizens should press their
representatives to set up UHC, where their coverage will be guaranteed and affordable.

Despite the opponents’ claims against UHC, a universal system will save lives and encourage
the health of all Americans. Why has public education been so easily accepted, but not public
196 | ARGUMENT

health care? It is time for Americans to start thinking socially about health in the same ways
they think about education and police services: as rights of US citizens.

Discussion Questions

1. What is the author’s main claim in this essay?

2. Does the author fairly and accurately present counterarguments to this claim? Explain
your answer using evidence from the essay.
3. Does the author provide sufficient background information for his reader about this
topic? Point out at least one example in the text where the author provides background
on the topic. Is it enough?
4. Does the author provide a course of action in his argument? Explain your response using
specific details from the essay.

Student Writing Example

Salvaging Our Old-Growth Forests

It’s been so long since I’ve been there I can’t clearly remember what it’s like. I can only look at
the pictures in my family photo album. I found the pictures of me when I was a little girl
standing in front of a towering tree with what seems like endless miles and miles of forest in
the background. My mom is standing on one side of me holding my hand, and my older brother
is standing on the other side of me, making a strange face. The faded pictures don’t do justice to
the real-life magnificence of the forest in which they were taken—the Olympic National
Forest—but they capture the awe my parents felt when they took their children to the ancient
forest.

Today these forests are threatened by the timber companies that want state and federal
governments to open protected old-growth forests to commercial logging. The timber
industry’s lobbying attempts must be rejected because the logging of old-growth forests is
 ARGUMENT | 197

unnecessary, because it will destroy a delicate and valuable ecosystem, and because these rare
forests are a sacred trust.

Those who promote logging of old-growth forests offer several reasons, but when closely
examined, none is substantial. First, forest industry spokesmen tell us the forest will regenerate
after logging is finished. This argument is flawed. In reality, the logging industry clear-cuts
forests on a 50-80 year cycle, so that the ecosystem being destroyed—one built up over more
than 250 years—will never be replaced. At most, the replanted trees will reach only one-third
the age of the original trees. Because the same ecosystem cannot rebuild if the trees do not
develop full maturity, the plants and animals that depend on the complex ecosystem—with its
incredibly tall canopies and trees of all sizes and ages—cannot survive. The forest industry brags
about replaceable trees but doesn’t mention a thing about the irreplaceable ecosystems.

Another argument used by the timber industry, as forestry engineer D. Alan Rockwood has said
in a personal correspondence, is that “an old-growth forest is basically a forest in decline….The
biomass is decomposing at a higher rate than tree growth.” According to Rockwood, preserving
old-growth forests is “wasting a resource” since the land should be used to grow trees rather
than let the old ones slowly rot away, especially when harvesting the trees before they rot
would provide valuable lumber. But the timber industry looks only at the trees, not at the
incredibly diverse bio-system which the ancient trees create and nourish. The mixture of young
and old-growth trees creates a unique habitat that logging would destroy.

Perhaps the main argument used by the logging industry is economic. Using the plight of
loggers to their own advantage, the industry claims that logging old-growth forests will provide
jobs. They make all of us feel sorry for the loggers by giving us an image of a hardworking man
put out of work and unable to support his family. They make us imagine the sad eyes of the
logger’s children. We think, “How’s he going to pay the electricity bill? How’s he going to pay
the mortgage? Will his family become homeless?” We all see these images in our minds and
want to give the logger his job so his family won’t suffer. But in reality giving him his job back is
only a temporary solution to a long-term problem. Logging in the old-growth forest couldn’t
possibly give the logger his job for long. For example, according to Peter Morrison of the
Wilderness Society, all the old-growth forests in the Gifford Pinchot National Forest would be
gone in three years if it were opened to logging (vi). What will the loggers do then? Loggers
need to worry about finding new jobs now and not wait until there are no old-growth trees
left.

Having looked at the views of those who favor logging of old-growth forests, let’s turn to the
arguments for preserving all old growth. Three main reasons can be cited.
198 | ARGUMENT

First, it is simply unnecessary to log these forests to supply the world’s lumber. According to
environmentalist Mark Sagoff, we have plenty of new-growth forests from which timber can be
taken (89-90). Recently, there have been major reforestation efforts all over the United States,
and it is common practice now for loggers to replant every tree that is harvested. These new-
growth forests, combined with extensive planting of tree farms, provide more than enough
wood for the world’s needs. According to forestry expert Robert Sedjo (qtd. in Sagoff 90), tree
farms alone can supply the world’s demand for industrial lumber. Although tree farms are ugly
and possess little diversity in their ecology, expanding tree farms is far preferable to destroying
old-growth forests.

Moreover, we can reduce the demand for lumber. Recycling, for example, can cut down on the
use of trees for paper products. Another way to reduce the amount of trees used for paper is
with a promising new innovation, kenaf, a fast-growing, 15-foot-tall, annual herb that is native
to Africa. According to Jack Page in Plant Earth, Forest, kenaf has long been used to make rope,
and it has been found to work just as well for paper pulp (158).

Another reason to protect old-growth forests is the value of their complex and very delicate
ecosystem. The threat of logging to the northern spotted owl is well known. Although loggers
say “people before owls,” ecologists consider the owls to be warnings, like canaries in mine
shafts that signal the health of the whole ecosystem. Evidence provided by the World Resource
Institute shows that continuing logging will endanger other species. Also, Dr. David Brubaker,
an environmentalist biologist at Seattle University, has said in a personal interview that the
long-term effects of logging will be severe. Loss of the spotted owl, for example, may affect the
small rodent population, which at the moment is kept in check by the predator owl. Dr.
Brubaker also explained that the old-growth forests also connect to salmon runs. When dead
timber falls into the streams, it creates a habitat conducive to spawning. If the dead logs are
removed, the habitat is destroyed. These are only two examples in a long list of animals that
would be harmed by logging of old-growth forests.

Finally, it is wrong to log in old-growth forests because of their sacred beauty. When you walk
in an old-growth forest, you are touched by a feeling that ordinary forests can’t evoke. As you
look up to the sky, all you see is branch after branch in a canopy of towering trees. Each of
these amazingly tall trees feels inhabited by a spirit; it has its own personality. “For spiritual bliss
take a few moments and sit quietly in the Grove of the patriarchs near Mount Rainier or the
redwood forests of Northern California,” said Richard Linder, environmental activist and
member of the National Wildlife Federation. “Sit silently,” he said, “and look at the giant living
organisms you’re surrounded by; you can feel the history of your own species.” Although Linder
 ARGUMENT | 199

is obviously biased in favor of preserving the forests, the spiritual awe he feels for ancient trees
is shared by millions of other people who recognize that we destroy something of the world’s
spirit when we destroy ancient trees, or great whales, or native runs of salmon. According to Al
Gore, “We have become so successful at controlling nature that we have lost our connection to
it” (qtd. in Sagoff 96). We need to find that connection again, and one place we can find it is in
the old-growth forests.

The old-growth forests are part of the web of life. If we cut this delicate strand of the web, we
may end up destroying the whole. Once the old trees are gone, they are gone forever. Even if
foresters replanted every tree and waited 250 years for the trees to grow to ancient size, the
genetic pool would be lost. We’d have a 250-year-old tree farm, not an old-growth forest. If we
want to maintain a healthy earth, we must respect the beauty and sacredness of the old-
growth forests.

Works Cited

Brubaker, David. Personal interview. 25 Sept. 1998.

Linder, Richard. Personal interview. 12 Sept. 1998.

Morrison, Peter. Old Growth in the Pacific Northwest: A Status Report. Alexandria: Global
Printing, 1988.

Page, Jack. Planet Earth, Forest. Alexandria: Time-Life, 1983.

Rockwood, D. Alan. Email to the author. 24 Sept. 1998.

Sagoff, Mark. “Do We Consume Too Much?” Atlantic Monthly June 1997: 80-96.

World Resource Institute. “Old Growth Forests in the United States Pacific Northwest.” 13 Sept.
1998 [Link]

Discussion Questions

1. What is the author’s main claim in this essay?

2. Does the author fairly and accurately present counterarguments to this claim? Explain
your answer and describe an example of counterargument in the essay.
3. Does the author provide sufficient background information for his reader about this
topic? Point out at least one example in the text where the author provides background
on the topic. Is it enough?
4. Does the author provide a course of action in his argument? Explain your response using
200 | ARGUMENT

specific details from the essay.

Your Turn

What societal or personal experiences have you observed and considered to be argumentative?

What organizational structure would be best for the topic you consider: Classical, Toulmin, or
Rogerian?

Key Terms

• Appeals
• Ethos
• Pathos
• Logos
• Warrant
• Qualifier
• Counterargument
• Grounds
• Classical method
• Toulmin method
• Rogerian method
 ARGUMENT | 201

• Middle Ground
• Argumentation

Summary
In argumentative writing, you are typically asked to take a position on an issue or topic and explain and support
your position with research from reliable and credible sources. Argumentation can be used to convince readers
to accept or acknowledge the validity of your position or to question or refute a position you consider to be
untrue or misguided.

• The purpose of argument in writing is to convince or move readers toward a certain point of view, or
opinion.
• An argument is a reasoned opinion supported and explained by evidence. To argue, in writing, is to
advance knowledge and ideas in a positive way.
• A thesis that expresses the opinion of the writer in more specific terms is better than one that is vague.
• It is essential that you not only address counterarguments but also do so respectfully.
• It is also helpful to establish the limits of your argument and what you are trying to accomplish through
a concession statement.
• To persuade a skeptical audience, you will need to use a wide range of evidence. Scientific studies,
opinions from experts, historical precedent, statistics, personal anecdotes, and current events are all types
of evidence that you might use in explaining your point.
• Make sure that your word choice and writing style are appropriate for both your subject and your
audience.
• You should let your reader know your bias, but do not let that bias blind you to the primary
components of good argumentation: sound, thoughtful evidence and respectfully and reasonably
addressing opposing ideas.
• You should be mindful of the use of I in your writing because it can make your argument sound more
biased than it needs to.
• Facts are statements that can be proven using objective data.
• Opinions are personal views, or judgments, that cannot be proven.
• In writing, you want to strike a balance between credible facts and authoritative opinions.
• Quantitative visuals present data graphically. The purpose of using quantitative visuals is to make logical
appeals to the audience.
• Qualitative visuals present images that appeal to the audience’s emotions
202 | ARGUMENT

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

An interactive H5P element has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view it
online here:
[Link]

Reflective Response

Reflect on your writing process for the argumentative essay. What was the most challenging?
What was the easiest? Did your position on the topic change as a result of reviewing and
evaluating new knowledge or ideas about the topic?

Argument Copyright © 2022 by Wanda M. Waller is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License, except
where otherwise noted.
 CHAPTER 13: MLA RESEARCH AND CITATION | 203

CHAPTER 13: MLA RESEARCH AND

CITATION
204 | CHAPTER 13: MLA RESEARCH AND CITATION
 MLA RESEARCH AND CITATION | 205

MLA RESEARCH AND CITATION

Kirk Fontenot

Student Learning Outcomes

• Define the purpose of citation

• Correctly use in-text citations
• Write a properly formatted Works Cited page

Introduction to Citation
There are two main reasons why we research:

1. To learn new information.

2. To give credibility to our writing.

Of course, if no one knows that we have conducted the research, then it does nothing for our credibility. This
is why we cite our sources, both in the text of the essay and at the end in a Works Cited page or bibliography.
MLA stands for Modern Language Association. This professional organization publishes a handbook of
rules and standards that you should use when formatting your papers and citing your sources. MLA is generally
used when writing about the liberal arts and the humanities; other disciplines may use other formatting guides,
such as APA (American Psychological Association).
In this module, you will develop your skills in citing your research in an essay, using both in-text citation
(also called parenthetical citation) and a Works Cited page. Specifically, this chapter will focus on MLA
citation.
206 | MLA RESEARCH AND CITATION

Integrating sources into your essay

When you mention information in your essay that came from an outside source, it’s a good idea to use a signal
phrase to introduce that information. You want it to be extra clear that the information came from a source,
not from your own experience.
Some common and easy-to-use signal phrases include:
According to (author’s name), …
In (author name)’s view, …
In (title of article or book), (author’s name) states that…
The author points out that…. She [or he] also stresses that…
You can vary the signal phrases by using one of the following verbs instead of state, point out, or stress:

admit disagreed note

advise discuss observe
argue emphasize propose
believe explain reject
claim find reply
concede imply report
conclude indicate suggest
deny insist think

What is the difference between a direct quote and a

paraphrase?

Direct quote

Direct quotes are placed in quotation marks and are taken word-for-word from the source. Direct quotations
draw attention to key passages. Include a direct quotation in a paper only if:

• you want to retain the beauty or clarity of someone’s words

• you need to reveal how the reasoning in a specific passage is flawed or insightful
• you plan to discuss the implications of the quoted material

Can you make changes to a direct quote? Yes!

 MLA RESEARCH AND CITATION | 207

If you need to clarify a quotation by changing it in any way, place square brackets around the
added or changed words.

“In this role, he successfully conveys a wide range of emotion.”

“In this role, he [Robin Williams] successfully conveys a wide range of emotion.”

The brackets clearly indicate to your reader that this is added information that did not appear in
the original, but it does not change the intended meaning.

If you want to omit part of a quotation, replace the deleted words with ellipsis points.

“Overseas markets such as China, India, and Korea, which have rapidly growing middle
classes, are critical to the financial success of Hollywood films.”

“Overseas markets…are critical to the financial success of Hollywood films.”

The second example has deleted information from the original quote that was not necessary for
that writer’s thesis. The basic meaning is still there.

When modifying a quotation, be sure not to alter its essential meaning.

Why are you quoting this?

Readers will also want to know how a quotation is related to the point you are making.
When the connection is not readily apparent, provide an explanation in a sentence or two following the
quotation.
Don’t assume your quote is self-explanatory!

What is a paraphrase?

A paraphrase is a restatement of someone else’s ideas in approximately the same number of words.
Paraphrasing allows you to demonstrate that you have understood what you have read. It also enables your
audience to understand it.
208 | MLA RESEARCH AND CITATION

Paraphrase when you want to:

• clarify difficult material by using simpler language

• use someone else’s ideas but not their exact words
• create a consistent tone for your paper as a whole
• interact with a point that a source has made

Any paraphrase must accurately maintain the sense of the original.

Caution: If you unintentionally misrepresent the original because you did not understand it, you are
being inaccurate.
If you deliberately change the gist of what a source says, you are being unethical.

What about summarizing?

Summarizing is different from paraphrasing in that a summary is much shorter than the source material.
A paraphrase of a paragraph should also be approximately a paragraph long; a summary of a paragraph may
be just one sentence.
The reason that all of the distinctions are important is that we want to avoid even the appearance
of plagiarism.

The Basics of In-Text Citation (Also Known as Parenthetical

Citation)
When we’re writing an essay using research, it’s important to always be clear when information is coming
from a source. A source is any place where we get information—a website, book, journal article, video, news
report—really, anything that is not first-hand experience.
We place an in-text citation immediately after whatever information we’ve just written. Whether it’s a direct
quote (word-for-word from the source, in quotation marks) or a paraphrase (information rewritten in our own
words), we must IMMEDIATELY write an in-text citation, every single time.
In MLA format, generally, you want your in-text citation to include the author’s last name and the page
number where you found the information. You put both in parenthesis, and that’s it; you don’t add a comma
or “pg” or anything else. Save the period until after the in-text citation, like this:
 MLA RESEARCH AND CITATION | 209

According to the article “Artificial Intelligence and Intellectual Property” from CQ Researcher,
“Some worry that generative AI’s output will become so much like human-generated works
that it will be next to impossible to detect—and so pervasive that tracking it down becomes too
onerous. It could make college essays obsolete, for example, or at least an endeavor that would
have to be completed in class under close scrutiny” (Day 5).

• The signal phrase tells the reader that the information came from an article from the database CQ
Researcher.
• The quotation marks tell the reader that this is a direct quote, word-for-word from the article.
• The in-text citation at the end tells the reader that the author of this article is named Day, and the
quote came from page 5 of the article. Notice that the period that you might expect to find at the end of
the quote is instead found after the in-text citation.

Of course, there will be exceptions to the formatting of your in-text citations. For example, web articles don’t
have page numbers, and some articles don’t have a credited author. Below are some examples of what in-text
citations will look like in those circumstances.

Examples of In-Text Citations

In-text citation, one author, direct quote:

“Environmentalists are demanding that fast-food chains adopt eco-friendly packaging”

(Maynard 4).

Two authors, direct quote:

“Environmentalists are demanding that fast-food chains adopt eco-friendly packaging”

(Maynard and Smith 4).

Three authors, direct quote:

“Environmentalists are demanding that fast-food chains adopt eco-friendly packaging”

(Maynard et al 4).
210 | MLA RESEARCH AND CITATION

No author, direct quote:

“Environmentalists are demanding that fast-food chains adopt eco-friendly packaging” (“Fast-
Food Shakeout” 4).

Two articles by the exact same author:

“Environmentalists are demanding that fast-food chains adopt eco-friendly packaging”

(Maynard, “Fast-Food Shakeout” 4).

Or

According to Maynard, “Environmentalists are demanding that fast-food chains adopt eco-
friendly packaging” (“Fast-Food Shakeout” 4).

Direct quote with a signal phrase:

According to Maynard, “Environmentalists are demanding that fast-food chains adopt eco-
friendly packaging” (4).

Or

According to the article “Fast-Food Shakeout,” “Environmentalists are demanding that fast-
food chains adopt eco-friendly packaging” (Maynard 4).

Paraphrase:

One change that fast-food restaurants are making is to switch to packaging that is better for
the environment, so that the environmental advocates are happy (Maynard 4).

Watch the following video for even more explanation of how in-text citations work:

One or more interactive elements has been excluded from this version of the text. You can view
them online here: [Link]

In-Text Citation in Action!

Some of you may be wondering what this all will actually look like in your essay. Let’s look at a sample body
paragraph that incorporates research using direct quotes, paraphrasing, signal phrases, and in-text citations.
When writing the research essay, you will need to read all that you can about your topic and pick out
 MLA RESEARCH AND CITATION | 211

selections you’ll want to mention in your essay—BEFORE you begin writing. It’s a terrible idea to try to skim
through articles while you are also drafting your essay. Instead, make an outline, write out quotes that might
go in each body paragraph, and add the in-text citations before you begin.
For this example, I’ve already picked out quotes from my sources and copied and pasted them into a blank
document. Now I’ll start writing a body paragraph using this formula:

• Topic sentence (never start with a direct quote)

• First supporting point (1-2 sentences)
• Evidence: Direct quote or paraphrase from your source (1-2 sentences)
• Explanation of the direct quote or paraphrase. How does that prove anything about your topic
sentence? (1-2 sentences)
• Repeat until you have made all your points about that topic

Now I will write my thesis statement. This will be the point I’m making in the whole essay. It will also preview
my three supporting points. Each supporting point will then become its own body paragraph!
Thesis statement: The fast-food industry is under pressure to make changes to its packaging, its
menus, and its advertising.
And here is my sample body paragraph. Notice how it starts with a topic sentence. It uses only information
from my sources, both as direct quotes and as paraphrasing. Each piece of info is immediately followed by an
in-text citation.

The first major change the fast-food industry is under pressure to make is to its packaging.
One fast-food place that is making this change right now is Starbucks. According to NPR,
“Starbucks announced a goal in 2020 to reduce waste by 50% by 2030” (Shivaram). Starbucks
also says that by 2025 they want customers to either use their own cup or a reusable cup they
buy from Starbucks (Shivaram). Environmental groups are flexing their muscles and pressuring
restaurants like McDonald’s to change packaging. CQ Researcher points out, “Environmentalists
are demanding that fast-food chains adopt eco-friendly packaging” (Maynard 4). This pressure
is not new. McDonald’s faced this same pressure back in the ’80s. “McDonald’s felt [activists’]
early wrath when [they] hatched the ‘McToxics’ campaign in 1987 to persuade the fast-food
chain to stop using wasteful Styrofoam clamshell containers, which carry suspected
carcinogens” (Raeburn). They are still feeling this pressure. An article from PBS Newshour
explains, “[In September 2021], the company announced they will drastically cut its use of plastic
by the end of 2025. One way they’ll do that is by replacing the 1 billion children’s toys it sells
212 | MLA RESEARCH AND CITATION

each year with cardboard or recycled or plant-based plastics” (“McDonald’s Pledges”). Cutting
out plastic from Happy Meals will obviously greatly reduce the amount of plastic McDonald’s
uses, which is a good thing for the environment. These are all examples of activists putting
pressure on fast-food places to change their packaging to be more eco-friendly.

The Works Cited Page

Here is a sample Works Cited page. It is created from the sources used in the sample paragraph above. Notice
that you can use the in-text citations to easily find the corresponding article in the Works Cited page.

As you can see, a Works Cited page is essentially just a list of the sources that you use in your paper. However,
the list has to be written in a very specific format.
Online databases from your college’s library usually provide MLA citations for you. When reading an article
from a database, look for a button or link that says “Cite” or “Cite Now.”
 MLA RESEARCH AND CITATION | 213

Articles from other web sources or print sources will not provide citations for you. However, you can easily
write them yourself! Follow the citations in the sample Works Cited page above like a model. You can also find
worksheets online that will walk you through writing a Works Cited citation, like this one: MLA 8th Edition
Worksheet: Web Page on a Website ([Link])
You can also use shortcut tools that generate a citation for you when you copy and paste the link. However,
use these shortcuts with caution. Like with any shortcut, you run the risk of making mistakes. If you use
a shortcut tool that you find online, double-check the output to make sure your citation is free of errors.
Remember, it is up to you, not the shortcut tool, to be accurate.

Here are eight quick rules for this Works Cited page:

1. Start a new page for your Works Cited list (e.g., if your paper is 4 pages long, start your
Works Cited list on page 5).
2. Center the title, Works Cited, at the top of the page and do not bold or underline it. Look
for the alignment option in Word.
3. Double-space the list.
4. Start the first line of each citation at the left margin; each subsequent line should be
indented (also known as a “hanging indent”).
5. Put your list in alphabetical order. Alphabetize the list by the first word in the citation. In
most cases, the first word will be the author’s last name. Where the author is unknown,
alphabetize by the first word in the title, ignoring the words a, an, the.
6. For each author, give the last name followed by a comma and the first name followed by
a period.
7. Italicize the titles of full works: books, audiovisual material, and websites.
8. Do not italicize titles of parts of works, such as articles from newspapers, magazines, or
journals/essays; poems; short stories; or chapter titles from a book / chapters or sections
of an Internet document. Instead, use quotation marks.

With the Works Cited page, formatting matters. Before you submit your Works Cited page, go to Google, type
in “Sample MLA Works Cited,” and click “Images.” You’ll see many examples of how a Works Cited page
should look. Compare your Works Cited to the images you see. Yours should look exactly like the ones in the
search results. If something about yours is different, make it match the examples.
214 | MLA RESEARCH AND CITATION

Your Turn

Choose one of the following options:

Option 1

Read an article on a topic you find interesting. Write a one-paragraph summary of the article. In
your summary, include at least one example of each of the following:

1. A signal phrase that integrates a source into your writing

2. A direct quote with an in-text citation
3. A paraphrase with an in-text citation

Option 2

Pick a topic that you find interesting. Find at least three articles on that topic, whether from the
web or your library’s databases. Write a Works Cited page using those three articles.

Key Terms

• Cite
• Works Cited
• In-text citation
• Direct quote
• Paraphrase
• Summarize
• Signal phrase
 MLA RESEARCH AND CITATION | 215

Summary
• When writing papers in the liberal arts or humanities, use MLA guidelines for formatting and citation.
• Citing your sources gives appropriate credit and provides authority to your writing.
• In-text citation credits the source within the text of the paper itself.
• A Works Cited page is a carefully formatted list of sources used in the paper.
• A direct quote is word-for-word from the source, while a paraphrase has been reworded.
• Signal phrases add further clarity to your writing and ensure that proper credit is given to your sources.

Reflective Response

Why do you think it is important to give credit to the sources we use when writing research
papers? Put yourself on the other side of the equation: If you published a paper, would you want
other writers to give you appropriate credit when they mention your ideas? Why or why not?
216 | MLA RESEARCH AND CITATION
 CHAPTER 14: GRAMMAR AND MECHANICS MINI-LESSONS | 217

CHAPTER 14: GRAMMAR AND

MECHANICS MINI-LESSONS
218 | CHAPTER 14: GRAMMAR AND MECHANICS MINI-LESSONS
 GRAMMAR AND MECHANICS MINI-LESSONS | 219

GRAMMAR AND MECHANICS

MINI-LESSONS

Use these mini-lessons on grammar and writing mechanics to develop your writing skills based on feedback
from the instructor and Writing Community Reviews. They include:

• Subjects and Verbs, Irregular Verbs, and Subject-Verb Agreement

• Sentence Types
• Fragments I
• Run-ons and Comma Splices I
• Comma Usage
• Parallelism
• The Apostrophe
• Capital Letters

Each lesson contains brief videos to teach you or refresh your understanding of proper grammar, punctuation,
and usage.

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220 | MINI-LESSON: SUBJECTS AND VERBS, IRREGULAR VERBS, SUBJECT-VERB AGREEMENT

MINI-LESSON: SUBJECTS AND VERBS,

IRREGULAR VERBS, SUBJECT-VERB
AGREEMENT

To refresh your understanding of subjects, verbs, irregular verbs, and subject-verb agreement, review the videos
below:
Subjects and Verbs

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them online here: [Link]

Irregular Verbs in the Past Tense

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them online here: [Link]

Subject-Verb Agreement

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them online here: [Link]

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 MINI-LESSON: SENTENCE TYPES | 221

MINI-LESSON: SENTENCE TYPES

To refresh your understanding of different types of sentences, their grammar, and their structure, review the
videos below:
Simple Sentences and Compound Sentences

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them online here: [Link]

Complex Sentences

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them online here: [Link]

Compound Complex Sentences

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them online here: [Link]

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222 | MINI-LESSON: FRAGMENTS I

MINI-LESSON: FRAGMENTS I

To refresh your understanding of sentence fragments, review the videos below:

Sentence Fragments

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them online here: [Link]

Sentence Fragments, How to Identify and Correct Them in Writing

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them online here: [Link]

Sentences and Sentence Fragments

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them online here: [Link]

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 MINI-LESSON: RUN-ONS AND COMMA SPLICES I | 223

MINI-LESSON: RUN-ONS AND COMMA

SPLICES I

To refresh your understanding of run-on sentences and comma splice sentences, review the videos below:
Run-on Sentences

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them online here: [Link]

Comma Splices and How to Fix Them

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them online here: [Link]

How to Avoid Run-on Sentences

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them online here: [Link]

Identify and Fix Comma Splices

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them online here: [Link]
224 | MINI-LESSON: RUN-ONS AND COMMA SPLICES I

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 MINI-LESSON: COMMA USAGE | 225

MINI-LESSON: COMMA USAGE

To refresh your understanding of how to correctly use commas, review the videos below:
How to Use Commas – Overview

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them online here: [Link]

Using Commas Correctly

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226 | MINI-LESSON: PARALLELISM

MINI-LESSON: PARALLELISM

To strengthen your understanding of parallelism in sentence structure, review the videos below:
Parallelism in Writing – What it is and how to avoid problems

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them online here: [Link]

Parallelism in Grammar (English closed captioning is not available for this video.)

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them online here: [Link]

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 MINI-LESSON: THE APOSTROPHE | 227

MINI-LESSON: THE APOSTROPHE

To strengthen your understanding of how to use apostrophes correctly, review the video below:
Using Apostrophes in Written English

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them online here: [Link]

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228 | MINI-LESSON: CAPITAL LETTERS

MINI-LESSON: CAPITAL LETTERS

To strengthen your understanding of the proper use of capitalization in written English, review the video
below:
Capitalization in Grammar

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them online here: [Link]

If you want a more in-depth review, you can watch this video as well:

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 GRAMMAR PRACTICE: INTERACTIVE QUIZZES | 229

GRAMMAR PRACTICE: INTERACTIVE

QUIZZES

For additional grammar practice, choose the topic(s) you want to develop by taking interactive quizzes from
the Guide to Grammar and Writing.

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230 | DE COPIA: DEMONSTRATION OF THE VARIETY OF LANGUAGE

DE COPIA: DEMONSTRATION OF THE

VARIETY OF LANGUAGE

In De Copia, Erasmus re-writes the same sentence over and over to demonstrate the variety of language.
You will be assigned a sentence to re-write 25–30 times.
Here is one example:

30 variations of “A loud sound awakes me in the night”

1. In the bewitching hour, a resonant buzz raises me out of my crib.
2. A noisy growl returns me to my consciousness in the dead of night.
3. After dark, I am wide-awake because of a powerful bang.
4. I can no longer sleep due to the harsh noise in the darkness of the day.
5. I rise out of bed because of a deafening noise in the nighttime.
6. At the time when the moon is out high and bright, I become conscious due to a resonant sound.
7. A crazy roaring awakes me in the darkness of the day.
8. In the night, a blaring sound wakes me up.
9. The god of sleep has abandoned me when a loud noise strikes out in the night.
10. In the dark hours, a big wave of sound had me awakened.
11. I am awakened by the vociferous noise after dark.
12. I am forced to end my body resting process at bedtime due to a powerful boom after dark.
13. An extremely harsh buzz forces me out of my dream at the bewitching hour.
14. I am left alone by the god of dreams and nightmares when a noisy sound bothers my ears.
15. In the night, a loud sound wakes me up.
16. After dark, I rise out of my crib because of an annoying wailing.
17. I wake up because of a heavy bang in the dark hours.
18. I become conscious due to a resonant sound in the dark time of the day.
19. After dark, an intense buzz forces me out of my body’s resting process.
20. I am awakened by the thundering sound when the sun had rested a long time ago.
21. A powerful boom makes me rise out of my sleepiness in the pitch black.
22. A heavy cry awakes me in the dead of night.
23. A deafening noise in the nighttime has me rise out of bed.
24. An unpleasant sound has awakened me after dark.
 DE COPIA: DEMONSTRATION OF THE VARIETY OF LANGUAGE | 231

25. At a bewitching hour, a blaring noise wakes me up.

26. My dream ends abruptly because of a noisy growl in the pitch-black time of the day.
27. In the night, I come to my conscious due to the blaring noise.
28. When the moon shines bright and high, I am forced out of my dream because of a thundering sound.
29. My sleep is ended when I hear a loud noise after dark.
30. In the night, a resonant howl awakes me.

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232 | STYLE EXERCISE: VOICE

STYLE EXERCISE: VOICE

The de copia exercise is useful in showing how style—the third canon of rhetoric (invention, arrangement,
style, memory, and delivery)—has a major impact on one’s writing. Paragraphs and essays that feature
combined and varied sentences often shine the most.
For this exercise, I would like for you to try to transform your own writing to mimic another’s voice. This
type of exercise is designed to help make you think about the choices a writer makes in designing his or her
writing style.
You’ll complete four steps:

• Write a brief one-paragraph story that describes a key quality of yours to someone not in our class.
• Read some sample passages and note their distinct writing styles. These are in very different genres, of
course, but that’s part of the fun.
• Mimic one of those writing styles to re-tell your story. You can choose a different “audience” for your
description if you’d like.
• Answer the questions: What choices did you make in re-designing your story? What obstacles did you
face? How would you characterize your voice vs. the one you mimicked?

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 APPENDIX A: CHECKLIST FOR ACCESSIBILITY | 233

APPENDIX A: CHECKLIST FOR

ACCESSIBILITY

This title has been reviewed to meet these accessibility practices:

Organizing Content
• Content is organized under headings and subheadings.
• Headings and subheadings are used sequentially (e.g., Heading 1, Heading 2).

Images
• Images that convey information include alternative text (alt text) descriptions of the image’s content or
function.
• Graphs, charts, and maps also include contextual or supporting details in the text surrounding the
image.
• Images do not rely on color to convey information.
• Images that are purely decorative do not have alt text descriptions. (Descriptive text is unnecessary if the
image doesn’t convey contextual content information).

Links
• The link text describes the destination of the link and does not use generic text such as “click here” or
“read more.”
• If a link will open or download a file (like a PDF or Excel file), a textual reference is included in the link
information (e.g., [PDF]).
• Links do not open in new windows or tabs.
• If a link must open in a new window or tab, a textual reference is included in the link information (e.g.,
[NewTab]).
• For citations and references, the title of the resource is hyperlinked, and the full URL is not hyperlinked.
 234 | APPENDIX A: CHECKLIST FOR ACCESSIBILITY

Tables
• Tables are used to structure information and not for layout.
• Tables include row and column headers.
• Row and column headers have the correct scope assigned.
• Tables include a caption.
• Tables avoid merged or split cells.
• Tables have adequate cell padding.

Multimedia
• All audio content includes a transcript. The transcript includes all speech content and relevant
descriptions of non-speech audio and speaker names/headings where necessary.
• Videos have captions of all speech content and relevant non-speech content that has been edited by a
human for accuracy.
• All videos with contextual visuals (graphs, charts, etc.) are described audibly in the video.

Formulas
• Equations written in plain text use proper symbols (i.e., −, ×, ÷).1
• For complex equations, one of the following is true:
◦ They were written using LaTeX and are rendered with MathJax (Pressbooks).
◦ They were written using Microsoft Word’s equation editor.
◦ They are presented as images with alternative text descriptions.
• Written equations are properly interpreted by text-to-speech tools.2

Font Size
• Font size is 12 point or higher for body text in Word and PDF documents.
• Font size is 9 point for footnotes or endnotes in Word and PDF documents.

1. For example, a hyphen (-) may look like a minus sign (−), but it will not be read out correctly by text-to-speech tools.

2. Written equations should prioritize semantic markup over visual markup so text-to-speech tools will read out an equation in a way that makes sense
to auditory learners. This applies to both equations written in LaTeX and equations written in Microsoft Word’s equation editor.
 APPENDIX A: CHECKLIST FOR ACCESSIBILITY | 235

• Font size can be enlarged by 200 percent in webbook or ebook formats without needing to scroll side to
side.

Learn more about Pressbooks’ commitment to Accessibility.

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236 | GLOSSARY

GLOSSARY

Analogy

A comparison between two unrelated items based on their shared qualities

Appeals

In writing, an appeal is a strategy that a writer uses to support an argument.

Argumentation

Argumentation is a process of reasoning that asserts the reasonableness of a debatable position, belief, or
conclusion. In argumentative writing, you are typically asked to take a position on an issue or topic and
explain and support your position.

Arrangement

Arrangement is the organization and structure of ideas in your essay.

audience

An audience is a group of readers who reads a particular piece of writing. As a writer, you should
anticipate the needs or expectations of your audience in order to convey information or argue for a
particular claim.

Bias

Prejudice in favor of or against one thing, person, or group compared with another, usually in a way
considered to be unfair

Brainstorming

Generating ideas without interruption

Cause

A cause is something that produces an action, event, or condition.

 GLOSSARY | 237

Characters

People who appear in a story

Chronological

Organizing actions or events as they occurred in time

Classical Argument

The Classical Argument was developed by a Greek philosopher, Aristotle. The goal of this model is to
convince the reader about a particular point of view using appeals to persuade an audience.

Comparison

The act of finding similarities between two or more things.

Concluding Sentence

The Concluding Sentence summarizes the information to show unity within the paragraph.

Conflict

The problem, challenge, or obstacle a character must face in a story; types of conflict include human vs.
human, human vs. nature, and human vs. self

connotation

The feelings or attitudes that make up the extended definition of a word

Connotations

Positive or negative association a word suggests in addition to its literal meaning; for example, blue is a
color, but it also implies sadness

Content Editing

(Or substantive editing) A type of editing in which writers or editors make heavy changes to a text for
better comprehensibility; this type of editing addresses conceptual intent, content, and organization.

Contrast

The act of finding differences between two or more things

238 | GLOSSARY

Contributory Cause

Contributory Causes are secondary circumstances that produce actions, events, or conditions. However,
contributory causes alone cannot cause the action, event, or condition to occur.

Copy Editing

Concerns the mechanics and grammar of an essay; this kind of editing focuses on grammar, spelling,
style, and punctuation errors; in this step, writers and editors can address needless repetition and factual
inconsistencies

Counterargument

A counterargument is an expressed acknowledgement of opposing views that are fair and accurate
coupled with a response to the shortcoming in reasoning in the opposing views.

Criteria

Principles or standards by which things are evaluated

Definition

The rhetorical mode that we use when our thesis includes a term that we define for our audience

denotation

The literal and explicit definition of a word

Denotations

The literal, or dictionary, meaning of a word

Description

Details an author uses to help readers relate to a story; these details are based on the five senses

Differences

Characteristics that are not shared or are dissimilar

 GLOSSARY | 239

Direct quote

A direct quote is text taken directly from a source, word-for-word. Use quotation marks ("") to indicate
where a direct quote appears.

Effect

An effect is what results from an action, event, or condition.

Ethos

Ethos is an appeal based on the writer’s creditability

evaluation

Rhetorical mode that examines criteria in order to make a judgment about a subject or subjects.

Evidence

Available facts or information

Fast Drafting

Writing a draft as quickly as possible

Freewriting

the process of simply writing down any and all ideas about the topic that pop into your mind, without
worrying about format or organization

gather evidence

To gather evidence means to develop support for the point you're making

Grounds

The facts, data, or reasoning on which a claim is based

Hook

The Hook engages your reader's interest. It can be in the form of a question, a quote, an anecdote or story,
an interesting fact, or an original definition
240 | GLOSSARY

illustrate

To show or demonstrate something clearly

illustration essay

An essay which clearly demonstrates and supports a point using examples and evidence

illustration/example

Rhetorical mode in which the writer uses specific examples as supporting evidence for their point

Imagery

Language that appeals to the physical senses

Introduction

The Introduction is the first paragraph of an essay and plays an important role in writing an effective
paper

Invention

The start of the writing process. Invention means to come up with an appropriate topic, to develop a
main idea about that topic, and to gather supporting evidence for that main idea.

Judgment

A conclusion based on evidence

Line Editing

(Or stylistic editing) A type of editing in which writers or editors look closely at each line in the text to
correct syntax errors in order to ensure a consistent tone that is expressed in clear language; this kind of
editing evaluates a writer's style and focuses on clarity of meaning and word choice

Logos

Logical appeal is the strategic use of logic, claims, and evidence to convince an audience of a certain point.
The writer uses logical connections between ideas, facts, and statistics.
 GLOSSARY | 241

Main Cause

The primary cause that produces an action, event, or condition. The main clause requires critical
evaluation as it may or may not be immediately obvious.

Metaphors

A comparison between two things that are not usually related

Middle Ground

Middle Ground is part of the structure of the Rogerian argument. It is a discussion of compromised
solutions

Mind-mapping

Prewriting technique in which the writer takes 5 to 10 minutes to jot down all the ideas about the topic,
making connections with lines or arrows

Narrative

Storytelling; the written or spoken account of related events

Opinion

A view or judgment, often not based on evidence and often biased

paraphrase

Restating someone else's ideas in your own words. It is approximately the same length as the original text.

Pathos

Pathos, or the appeal to emotion, is an appeal to the reader’s emotion. The writer evokes the reader’s
emotion with vivid language and powerful language to establish the writer’s belief.

Plot

The sequence of events in a story

242 | GLOSSARY

Point of View

The perspective through which a story is told; stories can be told in first person (I), second person (you),
or third person (he, she, they)

Prewriting

The exercises that help you through the invention process

prewriting

Proofreading

The final step in editing in which writers or editors review a polished essay for minor errors and make final
edits before submission or publication of a text

Qualifier

The Qualifier is a component of the Toulmin argument that expresses limits to the claim.

questioning

In questioning, make a list of questions about your topic and try and answer them. Start with the “who,
what, when, why, how” type of questions.

Recursive

Characterized by repetition or reoccurrence

Reverse Outlining

A process by which an outline is created from a draft, which is then evaluated

Rogerian Argument

The Rogerian Argument was developed by Carl Rogers. Rogerian argument is a negotiating strategy in
which common goals are identified and opposing views are described as objectively as possible in an effort
to establish common ground and reach an agreement.

Sensory Details

Details an author includes that appeal to the five senses: taste, smell, touch, hearing, sight
 GLOSSARY | 243

Similarities

Characteristics in common or that resemble one another

Similes

A comparison of two different things using the words like or as

sketching

Sketching involves drawing out your ideas using a pen and paper. Writers often use techniques like the
Venn diagram to visualize ideas.

Spatial

Organizing items by their physical location

Summarizing

A process of taking information from a comparatively longer chapter, theory, or write-up and creating a
smaller version of it that covers all the facts and main points of the original version.

Supporting Sentences

Supporting Sentences provide examples or facts to support the topic sentence of the paragraph.

Theme

The underlying idea, message, or lesson in a story

Thesis

A proposition to be proved

Thesis Statement

The Thesis Statement expresses the overall point and main ideas that will be discussed in the body. It
usually appears as the last sentence of the introduction and is usually one sentence.

Tone

The author's feelings or opinions on a topic that are revealed through the author's word choice
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Topic Sentence

The Topic Sentence is usually the first sentence in the paragraph. It indicates what the paragraph will
discuss and guides the writer and reader

Toulmin Argument

The Toulmin Argument was developed by Stephen Toulmin. The method works best when there are no
clear truths or solutions to a problem

Transition

A change from one subject, place, state, or time to another

Transition words

Transition words and phrases are used to link together different ideas in your text.

Warrant

A Warrant is a component of the Toulmin argument that connects the ground to the claim.