TWIST!

by Andrew Alty
(from the novel by Charles Dickens)

OLIVER WALKS ON. HE MAY BE PLAYED BY A BOY OR A GIRL. HE SAUNTERS TO CENTRE,

LOOKING AROUND AT THE AUDIENCE AS HE WALKS. HE STOPS, TAKES THEM ALL IN

OLIVER Morning (afternoon) everybody!

AUDIENCE RESPONSE

OLIVER The name’s Twist, Oliver Twist. Heard of me? Know who I am? (AUDIENCE
RESPONSE) Ahh! Read the book have you? Seen the musical? Watched the
film at Christmas? Well listen-

HE APPROACHES THE STAGE APRON

OLIVER -It’s wrong. All of it. The whole thing. They made me seem so sweet, so
gentle, so innocent! (SHAKES HIS HEAD) But that’s not what it was really
like, not at all. The true story is very different. Would you like to hear it?

AUDIENCE RESPONSE

OLIVER Right then, here it is and don’t tell a soul-

The true tale of Oliver Twist!

MOOD MUSIC. THUNDER, LIGHTNING (IF AFFORDABLE)

A GIRL WRAPPED IN A SHAWL WALKS ON, CARRYING A BUNDLE IN HER ARMS, SHE LOOKS
AROUND NERVOUSLY DOLL

OLIVER It’s true- I never knew my mum. Never met her, didn’t even know her
name. She died on the day I was born. Can you imagine that? No mum or
dad or brothers or sisters. I still think about it every single day…

THE GIRL APPROACHES THE WORKHOUSE GATES, LOOKS AROUND, LOOKS DOWN AT THE
CHILD IN HER ARMS, SHAKES HER HEAD SADLY, PUTS IT DOWN AT THE GATES. SHE RINGS
THE BELL, RUNS OFF

OLIVER …This is her best friend. I say best friend.- she was no friend to me! She
just dumped me there. Left me on the steps of the Workhouse, and ran
away. I could’ve died right there- but thanks to my very quick thinking- I
didn’t…

THE BABY STARTS SCREAMING AT THE TOP OF ITS VOICE.

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OLIVER (PUTS HIS FINGERS IN HIS EARS) Listen to those lungs!

A WOMAN RUNS OUT TO THE GATES, SEES THE BABY, GOES OVER AND PEERS AT IT

MRS CORNEY Mr Bumble! Mr Bumble sir? Lord above, if it’s not a little child…

THE BABY CRIES EVEN LOUDER. MR BUMBLE APPEARS AT A WINDOW HAT + Cane

BUMBLE Another one? That’s three this week!

MRS C As true as I’m stood here sir. Left at the gate just as casual as you please…

SHE PICKS IT UP.

MRS C What d’you think then sir? Must we take it in?

BUMBLE Sadly we must Mrs Corney- for it is our Christian Duty, however ungrateful
the little wretches may be for all the kindnesses we lavish upon them.

(SHE SIGHS, WALKS INSIDE WITH IT)

MRS C Another mouth to feed!

BUMBLE Give him gruel like the rest of them. Gruel is good for the soul. (HE TURNS
TO THE AUDIENCE) Now then you ugly lot-

OLIVER -I didn’t like Mr Bumble, not one bit.

HE GOES DOWN THE FRONT ROW OF SEATS

BUMBLE Let’s have a look at you shall we?

OLIVER I was scared of him. We all were……

BUMBLE (TO FIRST KID) Show me your hands! (KID DOES) Filthy! No gruel for you
tonight…

OLIVER -He carried a cane and he wasn’t afraid to use it!

BUMBLE (2ND KID) Did you scrub this floor like you were told? Well then, set about
it!

OLIVER And he used it a lot…

BUMBLE (LOOKS UNDER 3rd KIDS SEAT) What’s this? Bread? Stolen I’ll be bound! I
shall have you flogged!

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KID (WHO IS REALLY AN ACTOR) Please sir no. Don’t sir, it’s not mine- it’s his -
(POINTS AT THE KID NEXT TO HIM) I swear it!

BUMBLE Little liar! Come with me boy… (HE LEADS THE KID OFF BY HIS EAR)

OLIVER …Ohh what a fearful, desperate place it was. And it was my home for ten
long years!

BUMBLE (SHOUTS) As for you lot- get back to work!

HE STRIDES OFF, DRAGGING THE BOY BEHIND HIM, STRUGGLING & SQUEALING

OLIVER Work! That’s all we did- I suppose that’s why they called it the
Workhouse…

WORKHOUSE INMATES MARCH ON IN REGIMENTED LINES.

OLIVER We scrubbed floors, dug holes, washed clothes, shovelled coals

INMATES Scrub floors, dig holes, wash clothes, shovel coals

OLIVER Chopped wood, polished doors, cleaned chimneys, swept floors

INMATES Chop wood, polish doors, clean chimneys, sweep floors

THEY KEEP THESE CHANTS GOING AS THEY WORK. PERHAPS THEY MOVE OFF THE STAGE
INTO THE AUDITORIUM?

OLIVER And all that time there was only one thing on our minds. Nothing else
mattered. It was all we thought about, cared about, dreamed of.. That’s
right, you guessed it! Food…

SONG No. 1 FOOD, GLORIOUS FOOD

Is it worth the waiting for, if we live till eighty-four?

All we ever get is gru-el!
Every day we say a prayer, will they change the bill of fare?
Still we get the same old gru-el!
There’s not a crust, not a crumb we can find,
Can we beg can we borrow or cadge.
But there’s nothing to stop us from getting a thrill
When we all close our eyes and imagine…

Verse 1
Food, glorious food! Hot sausage and mustard.
While we’re in the mood, cold jelly and custard.
Pease pudding and saveloys, what next is the question?

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Rich gentlemen have it boys – in-di-gestion!

Food glorious food! We’re anxious to try it.

Three banquets a day, our favourite diet.
Just picture a great big steak, fried, roasted or stewed,
Oh food, wonderful food, marvellous food,
Glorious food!

Verse 2
Food, glorious food! What is there more handsome?
Gulped, swallowed or chewed, still worth a King’s ransom.
What is it we dream about, what brings on a sigh?
Piled peaches and cream about six feet high!

Food, glorious food! Eat right through the menu.

Just loosen your belt two inches, and then you
Work up a new appetite in this interlude, then
Food, once again, food, fabulous food,
Glorious food!

Repeat Verse 2, with the added ‘coda’

Food Glorious food!...(continue as above until)…

Work up a new appetite in this interlude, then

Food!
Magical food,
Wonderful food,
Marvellous food,
Fabulous food,
Beautiful food,
GLO-RI-OUS FOOD!

OLIVER Food was all we ever talked about…

A GROUP OR CHILDREN, HARD AT WORK.

1ST Pork sausages!

2ND With gravy…

3RD Egg and chips!

4TH Bacon-

5TH Fried bread!

ALL SIGH IN UNISON

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OLIVER (TO AUDIENCE) Have you ever been hungry? So hungry you can’t sleep at
night? Because that’s what we were- all the time…

MRS COVEY STRIDES ON

MRS C In all my born days, I never heard such nonsense! Don’t you believe a word
of it, ladies and gentlemen. Just look at these dear, darling children!
Honestly now- do they seem hungry to you?

OLIVER YES! Look at them!

MRS C Hush your mouth Oliver Twist.

WORKHOUSE MASTER BRINGS ON A HUGE PAN, STIRS IT WITH A WOODEN SPOON.

MRS C Feed ‘em well, we do. Every single one gets an onion, a whole onion- once
a week. And a piece of bread on Sundays!

THEY ALL RUN AROUND, COLLECT THEIR BOWLS.

MRS C And of course, a delicious bowl of gruel stew twice a day - without fail!

THE MASTER STARTS SERVING SLOP INTO THEIR BOWLS

MRS C Spoilt- that’s what they are. And all they ever do is grumble. Listen to ‘em.
Just listen!

1ST I can’t eat this!

2nd -Give it to me then. I’ll eat it.

3RD It’s horrid

4TH It’s rancid

1ST It’s revolting

2ND And there’s not half enough of it!

OLIVER THROWS DOWN HIS BOWL

OLIVER This isn’t fair! We have to do something about it!

THEY ALL LOOK AT HIM IN SURPRISE

4th -Like what?

1st Nothing we can…

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OLIVER There is. Of course there is. We can ask for more!

THEY ALL STARE AT HIM, SHOCKED

ALL (IN UNISON) More?

OLIVER Why not? If we did it together- they’d have to listen then. What do you
say? Come on, complaining won’t change anything will it? How about it-
who’s with me?

THEY LOOK AT EACH OTHER APPREHENSIVELY, GET NERVOUSLY TO THEIR FEET.

OLIVER -What do we want?

ALL (TIMIDLY) More?

OLIVER Come on! Louder! (SHOUTS) We want more!

ALL We want more.

OLIVER We want more!

HE GETS THE AUDIENCE TO JOIN IN

AUDIENCE We want more! Etc etc

BUMBLE (RUSHES ON, STICK IN HAND) What’s this, what’s this? Silence! (HE
BRANDISHES HIS STICK) Silence this instant or you’ll have this to answer
to! (THEY QUIETEN DOWN. HE TURNS TO OLIVER AND THE OTHERS,
COWERING BEHIND HIM) Now then boy, what’s all this noise about?

OLIVER TURNS TO THE OTHERS. THEY GIVE LITTLE NODS OF ENCOURAGEMENT. HE STEPS
FORWARD.

OLIVER Mr Bumble sir, we- we all want some more!

A HUGE PIANO CHORD. BUMBLE LOOKS LIKE HE’S ABOUT TO EXPLODE.

BUMBLE What? ALL of you?

OLIVER TURNS TO THE OTHERS, THEY’RE SKULKING OFF AS FAST AS THEY DARE

BUMBLE Ah! …As I suspected. It’s you that wants more is it, Twist?

OLIVER LOOKS AT HIM, THEN TO THE OTHERS, THEN OUT AT US

OLIVER …This isn’t turning out quite how I expected..

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HE MAKES A RUN FOR IT. BUMBLE GIVES CHASE. JUST FOR FUN, THIS MIGHT BE THRU THE
AUDITORIUM. A GROUP OF OLD MEN HOBBLE ON STAGE, ALL TALKING AT ONCE

MRS C This boy is a trouble-maker, gentlemen. No respect for his betters, that’s
what it is. Something must be done!

VARIOUSLY “Something must be done!” “Make an example!” “Show him the error of
his ways” “Flog him!””Beat him!” “Starve him!” etc

BUMBLE ENTERS OUT OF BREATH DRAGGING OLIVER AFTER HIM, THROWS HIM ONTO THE
FLOOR IN FRONT OF THE BOARD. THEY ALL LOOK AT HIM, SHAKE HEADS MAKE TUTTING
NOISES.

CHAIRMAN Oliver Twist- the Parish Board has discussed your case and decided- una-
unamin- unaminous- together- that you are to be offered as an
Apprentice, forthwith.

OLIVER As a- a what?

BUMBLE (UNROLLS A PAPER) Let it be known to all, that the Workhouse Board
hereby offers a reward of five pounds to any man- or woman- offering
young Oliver Twist a trade, business or calling! (TURNS TO OLIVER) In
short and without further ado- you’re to be given away, young man! And
may God have mercy on your soul…

OLIVER Given away? To who?

ENTER SOWERBERY. HE’S THIN, PALE AND DRESSED IN BLACK

BUMBLE Mr Sowerbery – how delightful to see you again sir.

SOWERBERY Mr Bumble- a pleasure as always.

THEY SHAKE HANDS

BUMBLE This is him sir. This is the boy I told you about.

SOWERBERRY MEASURES HIM UP.

BUMBLE A good boy too. A little willful perhaps? In need of a hard word and a firm
hand but- put him to work and he’ll soon come to heel.

SOWERBERY Five pounds you say?

BUMBLE PULLS THE BANKNOTE FROM HIS POCKET.

SOWERBERY (SMILES) Well then– I’ll take him!

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BUMBLE GIVES HIM THE MONEY, TURNS TO OLIVER

BUMBLE Young man, meet your new employer- Mr Sowerbery the Undertaker… Off
you go, behave yourself and do as you are told! (HE SHAKES SOWERBERY’S
HAND) He’s all yours sir…

OLIVER IS LEFT ALONE WITH SOWERBERY

OLIVER (TO US) Sold? (SIGHS) Not even sold- given away!

SOWERBERY Come along boy! There’s work to be done…

HE STARTS WALKING OFF- FREEZES.

OLIVER So that was that- I was leaving the Workhouse for good! (SIGHS) The only
family I’d ever known…

OLIVER’S WORKHOUSE FRIENDS GATHER AROUND HIM, HAND HIM HIS CAP AND JACKET,
SHAKE HIS HAND, EMBRACE HIM. HE PUTS THEM ON. THEY WAVE AS HE WALKS OFF WITH
SOWERBERY

SOWERBERY Hurry along now!

SOWERBERY LEADS HIM DOWN INTO THE AUDITORIUM

OLIVER I wish I knew where I was going! And what’s an undertaker? Does anyone
know? (HE FOLLOWS SOWERBERY) What- no-one? Ask your teachers then!
Come on- quick! (THEY SHOUT OUT ANSWERS) (HE STOPS) They do what?
You mean, he’s a-

SOWERBERY (GESTURES) Welcome to your new home, Oliver Twist!

THE STAGE IS NOW SET UP AS THE COFFIN SHOP. IT’S GLOOMY, DINGY AND DARK. COFFINS
STAND AROUND WITH ONE CENTRE, ON A TABLE. OLIVER FOLLOWS SOWERBERY UP THE
STEPS

SOWERBERY (SHOUTS) …My dear? We’re back!

MRS SOWERBERY WALKS ON, LOOKS OLIVER UP AND DOWN.

MRS S (TO SOWERBERY) Wipe yer feet! (LOOKS AT OLIVER) -And who’s this little
urchin?

OLIVER (STANDS TALL AND PROUD) Oliver Twist ma’am-

SOWERBERY Our new Undertakers Apprentice!

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MRS S (EXAMINES HIS HAND) Filthy! And isn’t he small? Skin and bones, he is.

SOWERBERY He’ll fatten up my love!

MRS S I dare say he will- and on our victuals and drink! I see no possible saving in
Parish children – they always cost more than they’re worth! (TO OLIVER)
Well now, are you hungry, boy?

OLIVER I am ma’am! Exceedingly!

MRS S (TO SOWERBERY) Told you so! Eat us out of house and home, he will.
(SHOUTS) Charlotte! (CHARLOTTE RUNS IN) Give this boy some of the cold
bits from the dog’s dinner. I dare say he’ll eat ‘em. Won’t you?

OLIVER NODS ENTHUSIASTICALLY. CHARLOTTE HOLDS OUT THE DISH. OLIVER SETS ABOUT
EATING IT. CHARLOTTE WATCHES IN HORROR AS HE WOLFS IT DOWN

MRS S Noah!

ENTER NOAH, A COCKY BOY OF ABOUT FIFTEEN.

MRS S Noah- he’ll be under you. (TO OLIVER) Noah here runs the shop. Whatever
he tells you to do- you do it. Understand me?

NOAH (BRANDISHES HIS FIST) Or you’ll get this!

OLIVER (STILL CHEWING) But ma’am- what will I do?

MRS S, CHARLOTTE AND NOAH ALL LAUGH

NOAH Haha! He doesn’t know!

CHARLOTTE (LAUGHS) “What will you do?”

MRS S Why you’ll dust down the coffins, wash the corpses and prepare them for
their eternal rest, that’s what!

OLIVERS DROPS HIS EMPTY PLATE

MRS S You made quick work of that! Now then Noah, show young Oliver here to
his sleeping quarters, will you?

CHARLOTTE GIGGLES. MRS SOWERBERY HANDS HIM A LAMP

MRS S Goodnight Oliver. Pleasant dreams!

SHE WALKS OFF. NOAH TAKES OLIVER OVER TO THE TABLE, CENTRE, GESTURES UNDER IT

9
NOAH -In you go then!

OLIVER (LOOKS AROUND) You don’t mean- in here? With the coffins?

NOAH Ohh they won’t bother you- after all, they’re dead!

HE THROWS HIM A BLANKET, WALKS OFF LAUGHING.

OLIVER (TO US) It was a very very long night…

LIGHTS CHANGE. A CHURCH CLOCK CHIMES – IT’S TWO IN THE MORNING.

OLIVER (GETS UP) It’s no good- I can’t sleep, not in this place! I have to get away
from here. But where? Back to plates of gruel in the workhouse? Never!

HE SHAKES HIS HEAD, SITS DOWN

OLIVER (SIGHS) I don’t know what to do. I have nobody now. No family, no friends-
no-one I can turn to. No-one to help me. I’m all alone in the world…

HE SIGHS. THINKS. STANDS UP AGAIN

OLIVER (DETERMINED) -In that case I’ll just have to help myself! After all, I can’t
stay here and I’m not going back to Mr Bumble- so what other choice is
there? I mean, it’s not so bad-

HE PICKS UP THE BLANKET

OLIVER -At least now I’ve a blanket to keep me warm. (PICKS UP THE LAMP) And a
lantern to light the way at night… So here goes. Shhh…

HE CREEPS ACROSS TO THE DOOR, TURNS THE HANDLE, OPENS IT. IT CREAKS.

OLIVER Hush!

WE HEAR FOOTSTEPS. HE WAITS, LISTENS.

OLIVER They’ve gone. Now then- run!

HE RUNS. PERCUSSION ACCOMPANIMENT? HE IS LIFTED UP IN THE AIR, MIMES RUNNING.

1ST Run Oliver, run!

2nd Faster Oliver!

3rd Don’t look back!

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4th Get out-

5th Get away!

ALL Ruuuuuun!
NARRATION!!!!
AS HE RUNS, A SIGN FLIES PAST HIM, “LONDON 70 MILES”

OLIVER London?

1st VOICE London!

2nd That great place-

3rd No-one would ever find him there!

THEY DROP HIM TO THE GROUND. MUSIC? IT’S EARLY MORNING THE STREET FILLS WITH
PEOPLE. SHOPKEEPERS OPENING UP AND SETTING OUT THEIR WARES.
HAWKERS AND LABOURERS AND PORTERS WITH CRATES ON THEIR HEADS.
IMPORTANT-LOOKING PEOPLE STRUT ABOUT.

OLIVER London! I made it. I’m here!

HE WONDERS AROUND, TAKING IT ALL IN. NO-ONE PAYS HIM ANY HEED.

HE SITS DOWN MISERABLY ON THE SL STEPS. ANOTHER BOY IS SITTING ON THE STEPS SR.
STARING AT HIM. OLIVER TURNS, LOOKS AT HIM. DODGER LOOKS AWAY. OLIVER DOES THE
SAME, WHISTLES TO HIMSELF. DODGER WHISTLES TOO. OLIVER TURNS TO WALK AWAY, SO
DOES DODGER. BOTH STOP, TURN BACK.

OLIVER What are you looking at?

DODGER What are you looking at?

OLIVER WALKS CENTRE, DODGER DOES THE SAME. THEY STARE EACH OTHER OUT.

DODGER You’re ugly…

OLIVER Not as ugly as you!

DODGER KNOCKS OLIVERS CAP OFF. OLIVER KNOCKS DODGERS HAT OFF HIS HEAD. DODGER
PUTS HIS FISTS UP. OLIVER DOES THE SAME. BOTH SUDDENLY BURST OUT LAUGHING

OLIVER -Oliver

DODGER -Dodger.

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OLIVER HOLDS HIS HAND OUT. DODGER SHOWS HIM HIS FIST. THEY BUMP

DODGER (LOOKS HIM UP AND DOWN) …Not from round here are ya?

OLIVER SHAKES HIS HEAD.

DODGER …I can tell. You’re what we call green. Come far?

OLIVER More than 70 miles!

DODGER Ohh now I get it. Come to London seeking your fortune, I bet.

OLIVER No, no. Not my fortune- my family...

DODGER Ain’t you got one then?

OLIVER SHAKES HIS HEAD.

DODGER Ahhh that’s so sad! Well now p’raps old Dodger can help you out, like a
good mate should. (SLAPS HIM ON THE BACK) Want to meet mine? Proper
big family it is too. Loads of little brothers and sisters... wanna meet ‘em?

OLIVER You mean- now?

DODGER No time like the present, is there? A right friendly bunch they are too!
Especially dear old Fagin!

OLIVER Fagin?

DODGE Yes! You’ll love Fagin, I’m sure of that. She’s the nicest of the lot! She’ll
make you feel very welcome, very welcome indeed!

SONG No. 2 CONSIDER YOURSELF

Chorus 1
Consider yourself at home,
Consider yourself one of the family.
We’ve taken to you so strong.
It’s clear we’re going to get along.

Consider yourself well in.

Consider yourself part of the furniture.
There isn’t a lot to spare.
Who cares?
What - ever we’ve got we share.

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Verse 1
If it should chance to be we should see some harder days,
Empty larder days, why grouse?
Always a chance we’ll meet somebody to foot the bill,
Then the drinks are on the house!

Consider yourself our mate.

We don’t want to make no fuss!
For after some consideration we can state
Consider yourself one of us!

Chorus 2 (as above)

Verse 2
Nobody tries to be lah-di-dah and uppity,
There’s a cup of tea for all.
Only it’s wise to be handy with a rolling pin
When the landlord come to call!
Consider yourself our mate.
We don’t want to make no fuss!
For after some consideration we can state
Consider yourself one of us!

THIEVES DEN. EVERYBODY CHEERS AND INTRODUCES THEMSELVES. ENTER FAGIN. SHE’S
LOUD, SMART, STREET-WISE AND SASSY. SHE CAN BE GENEROUS AND SHE CAN BE NASTY
DEPENDING ON WHERE SHE IS AND WHO SHE IS WITH. EVERYONE GREETS HER.

DODGE This is Oliver, Fagin. He’s come to London in search of a family.

FAGIN (SHAKES OLIVERS HAND) A family is it? Well now, he’s at home here.
(SHOUTS) `Ain’t he boys and girls?

DODGER (PUNCHES OLIVERS ARM) See? Told you, didn’t I?

OLIVER LOOKS AROUND AT THEM ALL

OLIVER These can’t all be your children?

SHE THROWS BACK HER HEAD AND ROARS WITH LAUGHTER.

FAGIN Hah! Mine? No no my darling I just – (SHRUGS) collected ‘em all somehow.
They do seem to keep on turning up at my doorstep- don’t they Dodge?

DODGE Oh they do Mistress Fagin, they surely do…

FAGIN And they like it so much they stay on! Isn’t that right my cherubs?

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ALL NOD ENTHUSIASTICALLY

FAGIN Of course- they all have to earn their keep, don’t you my dears?

ALL NOD ENTHUSIASTICALLY

OLIVER What do you do...?

FAGIN We’re in the err- (CLEARS HIS THROAT) the recycling business. (LAUGHS)
But there’s plenty of time for that! First things first. Who’s hungry?

ALL SHOUT AND CHEER ENTHUSIASTICALLY

CHARLIE -What’s for breakfast ma?

FAGIN PULLS OUT A TRAY OF COOKED FOOD.

FAGIN Sausages!

THEY ALL CHEER, GATHER ROUND. SHE SHOOS THEM OFF, HANDS OLIVER THE PLUMPEST
JUICIEST SAUSAGE. OLIVER TAKES IT, WALKS FORWARD.

OLIVER Aren’t they friendly? (HE BITES INTO THE SAUSAGE. GROANS) Ohh that
tastes SO delicious. (HE EATS IT HUNGRILY, WIPES HIS MOUTH)

DODGER Well now Oliver what d’you reckon bro?

CHARLIE -Want to join our gang?

DODGER (NUDGES HIM) Our family!

CHARLIE LAUGHS

CHARLIE What he said…

OLVER (TO US) Well, what do you think everybody? Should I stay?

HE LISTENS TO THEIR RESPONSES.

OLIVER So- I’ve made up my mind… (TO DODGER) Yes, I’d like that very much!

CHARLIE Hear that, everyone? Oliver’s joining the ga- (DODGER SLAPS HIM) family!

THEY GATHER ROUND, SLAP HIM ON THE BACK, BUMP FISTS HI-FIVE ETC.

WE HEAR; A DOG BARKING, GETTING LOUDER. EVERYONE BACKS AWAY FROM THE DOOR. A
WHISPER GOES AROUND- BILL, IT’S BILL, IT’S HIM, IT’S SIKES ETC.. OLIVER LOOKS AT DODGE

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DODGER Bill SIKES. He’s a proper villain is Bill!

THE DOOR BURSTS OPEN. BILL SIKES STANDS FRAMED IN THE DOORWAY. HE HAS A
VICIOUS BULLDOG AT HIS HEEL. EVERYONE FREEZES AS THE DOG SNIFFS EVERYONE AND
GROWLS. ONLY DODGER GETS A LICK AND A TAIL WAG. SIKES NOTICES THE AFFECTION

SIKES Heel!

THE DOG OBEDIENTLY RUNS BACK TO HIM. AS BILL WALKS INTO THE ROOM EVERYONE
STEPS BACK AS HE GOES PAST.

FAGIN Bill! What a unexpected treat this is- and so early in the morning too. To
what do we owe the-
SIKES -How much for these? (HE THRUSTS A BAG INTO FAGINS HANDS)

FAGIN Well now Bill, that very much depends on- (HE LOOKS INSIDE) Ooh! S(HE
PULLS OUT SOMETHING SHINY, PUTS IT QUICKLY BACK IN) How
interesting! Where did you find these?

SIKES -Never you mind where I found ‘em. It’s what they’re worth, that’s what I
want to know.

FAGIN (HASTILY) Not now, Bill, not now, what with all of these eager eyes and
ears listening in- and some of them- (SHE GLANCES ACROSS AT OLIVER)
very new to the game, if you understand me…

SIKES ISSUES A COMMAND, THE DOG APPROACHES OLIVER, SNIFFS & GROWLS AT HIM
MENACINGLY.

SIKES …What’s your name lad?

OLIVER (AS FIRMLY AS HE CAN) My name’s Twist. Oliver Twist.

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15
FAGIN Listen Bill, we’ll meet you tonight in The Three Cripples. Eleven o’clock.

SIKES -And you’ll bring the money?

FAGIN …Every last penny, Bill.

SIKES GRUNTS, WALKS OVER TO THE DOOR.

SIKES (TO THE DOG) Get here!

THE DOG GIVES OLIVER ONE LAST GROWL AND GOES TO HIS MASTER.

SIKES (TO OLIVER) He don’t like you Oliver Twist- and neither do I!

HE EXITS. BOOS?? A MOMENTS PAUSE. OLIVER LOOKS WORRIED. FAGIN PATS HIS
SHOULDER

FAGIN Ohh never you mind old Bill. His barks far worse than his bite. (LOOKS
AROUND) -Now then my beauties, let’s get down to business, shall we? On
your feet you lazy lot! Time for work! Line up now, line up!

MUSIC; INTRODUCTION- BE BACK SOON.

ALL OF THEM START GETTING INTO LINE, BUTTONING UP JACKETS ETC.

FAGIN You know the rules! Number One?

ALL Stay together.

FAGIN Two?

ALL …Work as a team.

FAGIN And if the rozzers arrive?

ALL it’s everyone for themselves!

FAGIN You got it! Oliver, you’re with Dodger and Charlie.

OLIVER But – what do I do?

FAGIN Oh don’t fret- you’ll get the hang of it soon enough. They’ll show you the
ropes- won’t you lads? Give you some training. I’ve a feeling you’ll work
well together! (TO THEM ALL) Off you go then- and don’t come back
empty-handed!

SONG No.3 BE BACK SOON

16
Verse 1
You can go but be back soon.
You can go but while you’re working
This place I’m pacing round
Until you’re home, safe and sound.
Fare thee well but be back soon.
Who can tell where danger’s lurking?
Do not forget this tune,
Be back soon.

How could we forget?

How could we let our dear old Fagin worry?
We love him / her so, we’ll come back home
In, oh, such a great big hurry.
It’s him / her that pays the piper, it’s us that pipes the tune.
So long, fare-thee-well, pip-pip, cheerio,
We’ll be back soon.

Verse 2
You can go but be back soon.
You can go but bring back plenty
Of pocket handkerchiefs
And you should be clever thieves!
Whip it quick and be back soon,
There’s a sixpence here for twenty.
Ain’t that a lovely tune,
Be back soon.

Our pockets hold a watch of gold

That chimes upon the hour,
A wallet fat, an old man’s hat,
The crown jewels from the tower.
We know the Bow Street Runners, but they don’t know this tune.
So long, fare- thee-well, pip-pip, cheerio,
We’ll be back soon.
Then put the two sections of Verse 1 together and sing simultaneously in two groups.

PLAY OFF AS THEY ALL MARCH OUT. FAGIN IS LEFT WITH BILL’S BAG, LOOKS INSIDE IT, DOES
A LITTLE JIG AS SHE WALKS OFF.

STREET. MORNING. PEOPLE MINDING THEIR BUSINESS, HEADING TO WORK. DODGER AND
OLIVER WALK ON, CHARLIE CLOSELY WATCHING THE PASSERS BY.

DODGER …See Oliver, people these days- they’re just plain careless. They don’t look
after things! (CHARLIE WHISTLES, DODGER LOOKS AROUND, NODS) I
mean- see this feller here? In a dreadful rush, he is…

17
WE SEE A RICH GENTLEMAN RUNNING FOR A CAB. ONE OF THE GANG TRIPS HIM UP,
ANOTHER HELPS HIM TO HIS FEET, DUSTS HIM DOWN, RELIEVES HIM OF HIS POCKET
WATCH. THEY FLASH THE WATCH AT DODGE, HE NODS APPROVAL.

DODGER (OLIVER) Understand now?

OLIVER (TO US) You take things that don’t belong to you!

DODGER (TUTS) Oliver mate, you gotta stop thinking that way. You’re part of the
family now- remember? And family always comes first, right?

OLIVER LOOKS AT HIM, THEN OUT AT US.

DODGER (THREATENING) Right?

OLIVER (UNHAPPILY) …Right

DODGER So- now it’s your turn…

OLIVER LOOKS OUT AT US, AGHAST. MR BROWNLOW COMES WANDERING ON. HE’S IN HIS
60’S, AVUNCULAR AND KINDLY. HE’S CARRYING A PILE OF BOOKS UNDER HIS ARM. HE
LOOKS A BIT LOST…

DODGER This one’s perfect. Bet he don’t even know what day it is…

BROWNLOW STOPS AT A BOOKSTALL

DODGER So here’s the game- you bump into the old feller, the books go flying, you
help pick ‘em up and relieve him of that pretty silk scarf he’s wearing…

OLIVER LOOKS HORRIFIED, SHAKES HIS HEAD.

CHARLIE He ain’t got the bottle, Dodge.

DODGE Yes he do. Haven’t you? He’s my bro, my mate, he’ll shape up won’t you
Ollie?

BROWNLOW PAYS FOR SOMETHING. DODGER NUDGES OLIVER

DODGER Hurry it up chum, or you’ll lose your mark!

OLIVER TAKES A DEEP BREATH, WALKS OVER TO BROWNLOW, KNOCKS INTO HIM, THE
BOOKS GO FLYING;
OLIVER AND BROWNLOW LOOK INTO EACH OTHERS EYES- BOTH STOP AND STARE AT ONE
ANOTHER, TRANSFIXED. MAYBE A LIGHTING CHANGE? A BEAT; DODGER STEPS IN AND
QUICKLY STEALS THE SCARF, SLIPS AWAY. BROWNLOW REALISES IT’S GONE, LOOKS BEHIND
HIM, THEN BACK AT OLIVER.

18
BROWNLOW THIEF! THIEF!

NARRATION!!!

SHE GRABS DODGER BY THE THROAT

O
L
I
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FAGIN -What have you done with him? Quickly now!
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FAGIN Not until you tell me-

SHE SHAKES HIM. CHARLIE RUNS IN, OUT OF BREATH

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FAGIN DROPS DODGER, GROANS, PACES UP AND DOWN

FAGIN Then we need to get him back- and quick about it!

THEY LOOK PUZZLED.

FAGIN He knows who we are! What we do. Where we live… (TO DODGER) Get
yerself down there!

DODGER What? To the copshop? Not me.

CHARLIE Or me! (HE LAUGHS)

FAGIN LOOKS AT THEM, SIGHS, MUTTERS UNDER HER BREATH. NANCY WALKS ON
DOWNSTAGE.

FAGIN (SMILES) Nancy, my dear-

SHE LOOKS ACROSS AT FAGIN SUSPICIOUSLY

NANCY -I know that look. What d’you want now?

H
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19
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Did Oliver say something to the gentleman? Did he take our names?
BROWNLOW’S HOUSE. OLIVER IS IN BED, ASLEEP. HE STIRS, SITS UP, GROANS.

OLIVER My head! (LOOKS AROUND) Where am I? (PUZZLED) I don’t know this

place!

TWO SERVANTS ENTER, ONE CARRYING A TRAY WITH SOUP AND BREAD, A NAPKIN AND
SHINY CUTLERY. THEY FUSS OVER HIM. ONE OF THEM, MRS BEDWIN TUCKS HIS SHEETS IN.
THE OTHER SITS BY THE BED, STARTS SERVING HIM SOUP FROM A SILVER SPOON.

OLIVER …Am I dead? Is that it? Have I died and gone to Heaven?

HE EATS. THE MAID WIPES HIS MOUTH WITH THE NAPKIN. MR BROWNLOW WALKS IN

BROWNLOW Awake at last I see! And with an appetite too. Good, good…

OLIVER (SITS UP) You were the man who-

BROWNLOW …Now now Oliver, don’t upset yourself. Eat, eat!

OLIVER (STARTS GETTING OUT OF BED) -I swear sir, I didn’t steal anything, I didn’t-
they tried to make me bu-

BROWNLOW Shhh! I know, I know. Rest now. It’s alright. (PATS HIS HAND) You’re
among friends here…

NARRATION!!!
(One day….)

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21
BROWNLOW When you get there, tell him you’ve brought them back and you have
come to pay the four pounds ten shillings I owe him. Here-

HE HANDS HIM A BANKNOTE. OLIVER TAKES IT, PUTS IT IN HIS POCKET

BROWNLOW Come straight back now. No dawdling!

OLIVER RUNS OFF. BROWNLOW WATCHES HIM. ANOTHER MAN JOINS HIM AS HE RUNS OFF
INTO THE AUDITORIUM.

GRIMWIG -That’s the last you’ll ever see of him…

…
H
GRIMWIG Then you’re a fool, sir! A fool…
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OLIVER PACES UP AND DOWN. DODGER SITS PLAYING WITH HIS HAT

OLIVER (SWALLOWS) -What will he do with me?

DODGER Who- Bill? (CONSIDERS) Take you out of town somewhere, most likely.
Make you disappear. (SNAPS HIS FINGERS) Just like that.

OLIVER SHIVERS.

DODGER Sorry Ollie but there it is. Pity though. We could’ve been brothers you and
me…

OLIVER We still could! Dodger, just- just let me go now and I promise you I’ll-

DODGER You promise me? Hah! You can’t live on promises Ollie, not in this game…

FRONT DOOR SLAMS. OLIVER STARTS, DODGER SIGHS.

DODGER Oh well. Nice knowing you bro...

THEY LOOK ACROSS AT THE DOORWAY. NANCY WALKS IN, SEES DODGER- STOPS.

DODGER …Where’s Bill?

NANCY Downstairs…

DODGER (SUSPICIOUSLY) -What about Bullseye? He don’t go nowhere without that

mutt…

NANCY (LOOKS AROUND NERVOUSLY) Oliver we- we have to go. Now...

OLIVER REALISES WHAT SHE MEANS. HE STANDS, SO DOES DODGER

DODGER Go? If you’re taking him somewhere- I need to know where!

OLIVER -Maybe this time you don’t, Dodge.

DODGER (PUZZLED) What you talking ab- (SUCKS IN HIS BREATH) Nancy- what you
up to?

30
NANCY -Turn your back for five minutes Dodger, that’s all I need you to do.

DODGER You’re not serious? You’re not going to spring him?

OLIVER Turn your back Dodge. Just this once? For me- bro…

DODGER LOOKS AT HIM, SHAKES HIS HEAD.

DODGER …I’ll regret this, I know I will…

HE SITS, TURNS HIS BACK. OLIVER AND NANCY RUN OUT. A DOG BARKS DOWN IN THE
AUDITORIUM, GROWING LOUDER. DODGE STANDS. SIKES COMES BARRELLING DOWN THE
CENTRAL AISLE, BULLSEYE RIGHT BEHIND HIM.

SIKES (ROARS) How long ago? How long?

DODGER (SCARED) I dunno! Five minutes, maybe ten?

SIKES GROWLS WITH RAGE. FAGIN COMES RUNNING ON, FOLLOWED BY THE POSSE

FAGIN -And you let them GO?

DODGER She said she was taking him to Bill. How did I know she was-

FAGIN You should have followed them! How are we going to get him back now?

SIKES Ohh never fear, I’ll get them back, both of them! (SHOUTS TO THE DOG)
BULLSEYE! NANCY! FETCH!

THE DOG STARTS SNIFFING THE GROUND, GROWLS, RUNS OFF. SIKES PULLS OUT A PISTOL
FROM HIS JACKET.

SIKES …I’ll kill him! I’ll kill them both! (HE HEADS OFF IN FURIOUS PURSUIT)

FAGIN Bill, let’s not be hasty, we- (BILLS GONE. SHE TURNS TO DODGER) Well
don’t just stand there. Get after him!

DODGER RUNS OFF. THE REST OF THE GANG START TALKING AMONGST THEMSELVES.

FAGIN (HUSHES THEM) I think it might be best boys and girls, if we all kept out of
harm’s way for a little while. This could get messy. (STROKES HER CHIN
THOUGHTFULLY) Very messy indeed…

SIKES BRINGS OLIVER ON STAGE FOLLOWED BY NANCY

GUNSHOTS X2

31
Narration!!!

Oliver gets up and audience cheers

OLIVER: BILL SIKES IS DEAD

Judge come
oliver is scared
judge examines the dead bodies and bring oliver to the stage front

JUDGE: I conclude that Oliver Twist is not guilty of any crime as he is not onlu underage but
every thing was done in self defense
Oliver is relaxed
Meanwhile [Link] enters the stage

JUDGE: Furthermore you, Oliver Twist are to be given under the custody of Mr Brownlow

Brownlow and Oliver hug

All of them leave the stage