What do you think?
Rate this book
The Rules of Survival
This National Book Award Finalist is a thought-provoking exploration of emotional abuse, self-reliance and the nature of evil. A heart-wrenching portrait of family crisis, this is perfect for fans of Laurie Halse Anderson's Speak and Jay Asher's Thirteen Reasons Why.
For Matt and his sisters, life with their cruel, physically abusive mother is a day-to-day struggle for survival. But then Matt witnesses a man named Murdoch coming to a child's rescue in a convenience store; and for the first time, he feels a glimmer of hope. Then, amazingly, Murdoch begins dating Matt's mother. Life is suddenly almost good. But the relief lasts only a short time. When Murdoch inevitable breaks up with their mother, Matt knows that he'll need to take some action. Can he call upon Murdoch to be his hero? Or will Matt have to take measures into his own hands?
National Book Award Finalist
LA Times Book Prize Finalist
ALA Best Books of the Year
ALA Quick Pick
For Matt and his sisters, life with their cruel, physically abusive mother is a day-to-day struggle for survival. But then Matt witnesses a man named Murdoch coming to a child's rescue in a convenience store; and for the first time, he feels a glimmer of hope. Then, amazingly, Murdoch begins dating Matt's mother. Life is suddenly almost good. But the relief lasts only a short time. When Murdoch inevitable breaks up with their mother, Matt knows that he'll need to take some action. Can he call upon Murdoch to be his hero? Or will Matt have to take measures into his own hands?
National Book Award Finalist
LA Times Book Prize Finalist
ALA Best Books of the Year
ALA Quick Pick
272 pages, Hardcover
First published September 7, 2006
203 people are currently reading
19392 people want to read
About the author
Nancy Werlin
29 books1,084 followersNancy Werlin writes young adult fiction: New York Times–bestselling fantasy, Edgar-award winning suspense, and National Book Award-honored realistic novels.
Nancy's newest book is the comedy ZOE ROSENTHAL IS NOT LAWFUL GOOD.
Nancy's newest book is the comedy ZOE ROSENTHAL IS NOT LAWFUL GOOD.
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 1,157 reviews
November 12, 2008
This book was so well written that I didn't notice how disturbing it was until after I finished. I would call it haunting and beautiful. I kept reading well into the night.
Nancy Werlin has written a classic.
Nancy Werlin has written a classic.
March 21, 2024
✰ 3 stars ✰
“—everybody seems to agree that the instinct and responsibility of all humans is to take care of themselves first. You have the right to self-defense.
You have the right to survive, if you can.
But how come there don’t seem to be any rules about when you ought to help others survive? Rules telling you when that’s worth some risk to yourself?”
When you have a brief window to happiness and a safety net that could have been yours, it can also be more harmful than it is a blessing. For once you've had the taste of something of what you don't have or didn't know, all you want more than anything is to have that again. The Rules of Survival is the story of teenager Matthew and the desperate lengths he will go to in order for him to get t his younger sisters, Callie and Emmy, and himself away from the very dangerous clutches of his unbalanced and emotionally manipulative and violently abusive woman - their mother, Nikki. 😟
“I could feel Callie’s terror from the backseat, but she said nothing either. There was nothing to say. At least you had slept through it all, Emmy.
I need to do something, I thought. I need to get us out of this.”
People like Nikki - ' unpredictable, temperamental, and vicious, with weird little moments of generosity and laughter mixed in' - enjoy hurting others; they get this sick twisted pleasure out of making the other feel weak and powerless and helpless in their presence, and not feel the slightest remorse at their wildly offensive and dangerous antics.They enjoy holding the power over the other; so for her own survival of her peace of mind - when Murdoch broke things off with her - there was no way she could accept that sting of rejection - no way could she allow someone else to have power over her. 😬 And her children - were her one target to make him pay for what he had done to her - to reclaim that sense of control. It cuts deeper that this psychotic person is their mother - a mother who is supposed to love and protect them - not relish in their anguish and fear that a misstep or misdemeanor or misconduct could harm them in ways unimaginable.
Murdoch's rejection was the catalyst for the many turning points of the story; he was a man who she had swayed with her feminine charms, but who recognized how dangerous she really was. Is he to be held accountable or responsible for how Matthew and his sisters' lives became much worse after that breakup? In a way; because the few moments he shared with them was the hopeful key that they had never found - if there was only a responsible adult in their life who would save them - to speak up for them, perhaps things could have been different. 'But because of Murdoch, I could see now. It was no way to live. Because of Murdoch, I knew it should not go on. Because of Murdoch, it was now intolerable.' 🥺 That struggle to wait out the time to find that opening to show their mother's weakness was the driving force of the story. And it was rough - it was rough, because they were those few fleeting chances of escape that they were able to have only to fall from their clutches. This complex power of survival is something that affected me deeply; what methods one would take - not only to outsmart the other, but to find a way out from the other.
“It was about self-preservation. The human instinct for self-preservation is strong. I know, because mine pulls at me, too, like the needle on a compass.”
Oh Matthew, how hard you tried - how many times did he see a way out - only for it to be slammed in his face? How hard he fought to convince others to see how harmful it was to stay a minute longer with her? 'We could cope, and we would cope, because we always had.' But, how much can one endure till they say 'enough is enough'? 😢 For at times, he was fighting for his life against his own mother, for he knew the longer he stayed with her, the psychological and emotional trauma to him and his sisters would be impossible to fix. And he really tried - ever since Murdoch, that one man who came into their lives akin a hero - who blessed them with happy days and a kind shoulder - Matthew wanted more than anything to make him a permanent fixture in their lives - so that their mother could ease off the torture - the torment - the hurt and the abuse she inflicted on them - uncaring and unrepetant of her actions towards her own flesh and blood - chalking up her insanity to the dark demons she was fighting to keep at bay. 😒
This harrowing and heartbreaking story depicts the ways we adopt in order to survive - to cope with the things that we have no control over. How you can try to ignore it and accept it - the only way you know how to protect yourself - or fight to prove your worth - no matter the risk and endangerment to yourself. It can be a coping mechanism or a defensive strategy - a calculating ploy or a clever tactic - we all do what we can to survive - to make life work. 😔 It is this grim reminder of how oftentimes indirectly humans are just as much responsible for someone's difficulties - simply because they choose not to act. 'We didn’t need a superhero. Just an adult who acted to help us when I asked.' Mathew tried his hardest to keep Murdoch close - for he was the glimmer of hope - that heroic savior - who could have kept his mother sane and from letting her spiral deeper into a darkness she was determined to drag them down with her. Even when he felt helpless and defeated, he still fought to help his sisters cope - Callie who saw the signs of defeat and acted that it should not matter, when she, in fact, was breaking inside and for Emmy - her innocence and naivete a shadow of conflict for him and his mother - for she was that one defining link that compelled him to stay with Nikki. That even if he and Callie escaped, they couldn't leave without their half-sister, Emmy; and their mother would do anything - anything to prevent that from happening. 💔💔
“Whatever it was, the end result was the same: No amount of pretending could take us back to the way we were before.”
As much as it is a difficult read - definitely not one for the faint of heart - I feel conflicted at how odd it is that I never really felt any deeper connection to their plight. I mean, I could see the signs and the difficult situation they were in - but, I could not care. It is an important book for children and adults to acknowledge how critical it is to step up and speak up for someone who needs care, yet there was a certain detachment in the writing that prevented me from really connecting with them. I don't doubt what they experienced is no way to live and should never happen to anyone. 😥 'Callie and I were working so hard for you, Emmy, but as far as I could see, nobody else cared at all. For any of us.' I just couldn't feel it, which really bothered me. 😞 It was also an interesting choice to have the story format as an epistolary - letters composed to Emmy from Matthew, where he recounts the past events that took place to the future that they're in, and addresses the audience as you.
With this limited point of view, I never really got a keen sense of the person that Matthew was otherwise; perhaps it was intentional to keep the focus solely on his desperation to save his family, but we never got to see how it affected his school-life or interaction with any other children. Also, the short concise chapters that alternate briefly from the past to the present, where he occasionally breaks the fourth wall and converses with characters in the future regarding past incidents, prevented me from feeling more empathetic to the children's plight. 😕 Not that I didn't understand how traumatic an ordeal they were facing, but it made it difficult for the emotions to translate well into my heart; perhaps knowing what the eventual outcome would be, lessened the intensity of the overall emotional gravitas of the situation. But, even with that dissatisfied feeling of not feeling - I still felt a deep sense of contentment at knowing that these children got the closure and happiness that they so desperately sought. That despite the hardships and hurdles, there was in fact, a light at the end of the tunnel for them - that even with the rules of the survival that they followed - their patience and resilience truly paid off. ❤️🩹❤️🩹
“—everybody seems to agree that the instinct and responsibility of all humans is to take care of themselves first. You have the right to self-defense.
You have the right to survive, if you can.
But how come there don’t seem to be any rules about when you ought to help others survive? Rules telling you when that’s worth some risk to yourself?”
When you have a brief window to happiness and a safety net that could have been yours, it can also be more harmful than it is a blessing. For once you've had the taste of something of what you don't have or didn't know, all you want more than anything is to have that again. The Rules of Survival is the story of teenager Matthew and the desperate lengths he will go to in order for him to get t his younger sisters, Callie and Emmy, and himself away from the very dangerous clutches of his unbalanced and emotionally manipulative and violently abusive woman - their mother, Nikki. 😟
“I could feel Callie’s terror from the backseat, but she said nothing either. There was nothing to say. At least you had slept through it all, Emmy.
I need to do something, I thought. I need to get us out of this.”
People like Nikki - ' unpredictable, temperamental, and vicious, with weird little moments of generosity and laughter mixed in' - enjoy hurting others; they get this sick twisted pleasure out of making the other feel weak and powerless and helpless in their presence, and not feel the slightest remorse at their wildly offensive and dangerous antics.They enjoy holding the power over the other; so for her own survival of her peace of mind - when Murdoch broke things off with her - there was no way she could accept that sting of rejection - no way could she allow someone else to have power over her. 😬 And her children - were her one target to make him pay for what he had done to her - to reclaim that sense of control. It cuts deeper that this psychotic person is their mother - a mother who is supposed to love and protect them - not relish in their anguish and fear that a misstep or misdemeanor or misconduct could harm them in ways unimaginable.
Murdoch's rejection was the catalyst for the many turning points of the story; he was a man who she had swayed with her feminine charms, but who recognized how dangerous she really was. Is he to be held accountable or responsible for how Matthew and his sisters' lives became much worse after that breakup? In a way; because the few moments he shared with them was the hopeful key that they had never found - if there was only a responsible adult in their life who would save them - to speak up for them, perhaps things could have been different. 'But because of Murdoch, I could see now. It was no way to live. Because of Murdoch, I knew it should not go on. Because of Murdoch, it was now intolerable.' 🥺 That struggle to wait out the time to find that opening to show their mother's weakness was the driving force of the story. And it was rough - it was rough, because they were those few fleeting chances of escape that they were able to have only to fall from their clutches. This complex power of survival is something that affected me deeply; what methods one would take - not only to outsmart the other, but to find a way out from the other.
“It was about self-preservation. The human instinct for self-preservation is strong. I know, because mine pulls at me, too, like the needle on a compass.”
Oh Matthew, how hard you tried - how many times did he see a way out - only for it to be slammed in his face? How hard he fought to convince others to see how harmful it was to stay a minute longer with her? 'We could cope, and we would cope, because we always had.' But, how much can one endure till they say 'enough is enough'? 😢 For at times, he was fighting for his life against his own mother, for he knew the longer he stayed with her, the psychological and emotional trauma to him and his sisters would be impossible to fix. And he really tried - ever since Murdoch, that one man who came into their lives akin a hero - who blessed them with happy days and a kind shoulder - Matthew wanted more than anything to make him a permanent fixture in their lives - so that their mother could ease off the torture - the torment - the hurt and the abuse she inflicted on them - uncaring and unrepetant of her actions towards her own flesh and blood - chalking up her insanity to the dark demons she was fighting to keep at bay. 😒
This harrowing and heartbreaking story depicts the ways we adopt in order to survive - to cope with the things that we have no control over. How you can try to ignore it and accept it - the only way you know how to protect yourself - or fight to prove your worth - no matter the risk and endangerment to yourself. It can be a coping mechanism or a defensive strategy - a calculating ploy or a clever tactic - we all do what we can to survive - to make life work. 😔 It is this grim reminder of how oftentimes indirectly humans are just as much responsible for someone's difficulties - simply because they choose not to act. 'We didn’t need a superhero. Just an adult who acted to help us when I asked.' Mathew tried his hardest to keep Murdoch close - for he was the glimmer of hope - that heroic savior - who could have kept his mother sane and from letting her spiral deeper into a darkness she was determined to drag them down with her. Even when he felt helpless and defeated, he still fought to help his sisters cope - Callie who saw the signs of defeat and acted that it should not matter, when she, in fact, was breaking inside and for Emmy - her innocence and naivete a shadow of conflict for him and his mother - for she was that one defining link that compelled him to stay with Nikki. That even if he and Callie escaped, they couldn't leave without their half-sister, Emmy; and their mother would do anything - anything to prevent that from happening. 💔💔
“Whatever it was, the end result was the same: No amount of pretending could take us back to the way we were before.”
As much as it is a difficult read - definitely not one for the faint of heart - I feel conflicted at how odd it is that I never really felt any deeper connection to their plight. I mean, I could see the signs and the difficult situation they were in - but, I could not care. It is an important book for children and adults to acknowledge how critical it is to step up and speak up for someone who needs care, yet there was a certain detachment in the writing that prevented me from really connecting with them. I don't doubt what they experienced is no way to live and should never happen to anyone. 😥 'Callie and I were working so hard for you, Emmy, but as far as I could see, nobody else cared at all. For any of us.' I just couldn't feel it, which really bothered me. 😞 It was also an interesting choice to have the story format as an epistolary - letters composed to Emmy from Matthew, where he recounts the past events that took place to the future that they're in, and addresses the audience as you.
With this limited point of view, I never really got a keen sense of the person that Matthew was otherwise; perhaps it was intentional to keep the focus solely on his desperation to save his family, but we never got to see how it affected his school-life or interaction with any other children. Also, the short concise chapters that alternate briefly from the past to the present, where he occasionally breaks the fourth wall and converses with characters in the future regarding past incidents, prevented me from feeling more empathetic to the children's plight. 😕 Not that I didn't understand how traumatic an ordeal they were facing, but it made it difficult for the emotions to translate well into my heart; perhaps knowing what the eventual outcome would be, lessened the intensity of the overall emotional gravitas of the situation. But, even with that dissatisfied feeling of not feeling - I still felt a deep sense of contentment at knowing that these children got the closure and happiness that they so desperately sought. That despite the hardships and hurdles, there was in fact, a light at the end of the tunnel for them - that even with the rules of the survival that they followed - their patience and resilience truly paid off. ❤️🩹❤️🩹
April 11, 2007
I devoured this book in practically one sitting. I loved the taut suspense of this story--a story that will resonate with many teens who must deal with abusive parents. Matthew is faced with protecting his sisters from his unpredictable and often violent mother (who likely is afflicted with manic depressive disorder). Often he must bear the burden of her rage himself in order to to deflect it from the most vulnerable member of his family--his youngest sister, Emmy. The book is written from Matthew's point of view, as a letter to Emmy, who was too young to understand much of what was happening when they were living with their mother. Although the children are eventually rescued, there is still much healing to be done and writing the story is Matthew's way of purging much of his own pain.
April 15, 2009
"The Rules of Survival" is about Matthew Walsh who lives with his two younger sisters and their abusive mother. He retells his story through a letter that he intends to give to his youngest sister Emmy, who was too young to understand the events that went on when Nikki abused them and put them through more than just their fair share of pain.
This was such a good novel, I read it in only two days (both school days), so you can tell how addicted I was to reading it. I seriously felt Matt's pain and I was rooting viciously for him as I devoured the book. At first when he kept referring to Emmy by saying "you" it got on my nerves, but it faded away later on. I have never heard of Nancy Werlin before, but I'm definetly going to look at her other novels because this one came out of nowhere and impressed me. A lot.
This was such a good novel, I read it in only two days (both school days), so you can tell how addicted I was to reading it. I seriously felt Matt's pain and I was rooting viciously for him as I devoured the book. At first when he kept referring to Emmy by saying "you" it got on my nerves, but it faded away later on. I have never heard of Nancy Werlin before, but I'm definetly going to look at her other novels because this one came out of nowhere and impressed me. A lot.
February 28, 2008
My youngest daughter picked this book up on CD at our library. It's a first person narrative in the form of a letter from an older brother to his youngest sister recounting a troubling and turbulent period when the two of them, and another sister, between them in age, were living with their mentally ill mother. The story held my attention with its taut dark psychological tension. Since I have close relatives and friends with significant mental health problems, I found the events and behavior described were entirely plausible. The form of the narrative as a personal letter drew me in as well. I think the book is a good one for teens/young adults to have a window into family dysfunction and the impact of untreated mental illness on the sufferer and their family. It is not a pleasant read, nor is it for the faint of heart.
November 17, 2019
4/5 (no spoilers)
Βλέπουμε την ιστορία μέσα από ένα μακροσκελές γράμμα που γράφει ο Matthew στις μικρή του αδερφή όπου της περιγράφει τα όσα περάσανε με την μανιακή και βίαιη μητέρα τους μεγαλώνοντας. Δεδομένου αυτού του στοιχείου, κάθε φορά που γίνεται αναφορά στην μικρή αδερφή χρησιμοποιείται β ενικό. Εμένα μου άρεσε πολύ γιατί με έφερνε πιο κοντά με τα όσα συνέβαιναν αλλά κάποιοι εκνευρίζονται οπότε είπα να το αναφέρω.
Είναι μικρό βιβλίο και γι’ αυτό δεν θέλω να σχολιάσω συγκεκριμένα γεγονότα αλλά σίγουρα σε βάζει σε σκέψεις και προκαλεί δυνατά συναισθήματα. Ένιωθα τον πόνο και την απόγνωση του Matthew να προστατεύσει την οικογένειά του και ειδικά την μικρότερη αδερφή του. Από την αρχή μέχρι το τέλος περνάνε 5-6 χρόνια οπότε βλέπουμε τα παιδιά να μεγαλώνουν και να βιώνουν μια πολύ ρεαλιστική ανάπτυξη σαν χαρακτήρες. Το περιβάλλον στο οποίο μεγάλωσαν έχει φανερά αντίκτυπο στην προσωπικότητά τους και την μετέπειτα συμπεριφορά τους. Παράλληλα ποτέ δεν ένιωσα ότι οι αντιδράσεις τους ήταν υπερβολικές ή out of context. Ο Matthew είναι παιδί και παρότι είναι αποφασισμένος να κάνει τα πάντα για να προστατεύσει τις αδερφές του από την μητέρα τους, εκνευρίζεται που πρέπει από τόσο μικρός να είναι ο «γονέας» και φωνάζει και θέλει να φερθεί εγωιστικά. Είναι απολύτως λογικό λοιπόν να ψάχνει απεγνωσμένα έναν ήρωα που θα τους σώσει αλλά και να φτάσει κάποια στιγμή να σκέφτεται τον φόνο ως τη μόνη λύση.
Ναι είναι προβλέψιμη σαν ιστορία, αλλά οι χαρακτήρες είναι αληθοφανείς και η συγγραφέας κάνει μια πολύ καλή εξέταση του πως είναι να μεγαλώνεις με έναν βίαιο γονέα, την συμπεριφορά άλλων ενηλίκων όπως και το τι πάει να πει «ήρωας» σε αυτές τις καταστάσεις.
Γενικώς εντυπωσιάστηκα και σίγουρα θα διαβάσω κάτι άλλο από την Nancy Werlin.
Βλέπουμε την ιστορία μέσα από ένα μακροσκελές γράμμα που γράφει ο Matthew στις μικρή του αδερφή όπου της περιγράφει τα όσα περάσανε με την μανιακή και βίαιη μητέρα τους μεγαλώνοντας. Δεδομένου αυτού του στοιχείου, κάθε φορά που γίνεται αναφορά στην μικρή αδερφή χρησιμοποιείται β ενικό. Εμένα μου άρεσε πολύ γιατί με έφερνε πιο κοντά με τα όσα συνέβαιναν αλλά κάποιοι εκνευρίζονται οπότε είπα να το αναφέρω.
Είναι μικρό βιβλίο και γι’ αυτό δεν θέλω να σχολιάσω συγκεκριμένα γεγονότα αλλά σίγουρα σε βάζει σε σκέψεις και προκαλεί δυνατά συναισθήματα. Ένιωθα τον πόνο και την απόγνωση του Matthew να προστατεύσει την οικογένειά του και ειδικά την μικρότερη αδερφή του. Από την αρχή μέχρι το τέλος περνάνε 5-6 χρόνια οπότε βλέπουμε τα παιδιά να μεγαλώνουν και να βιώνουν μια πολύ ρεαλιστική ανάπτυξη σαν χαρακτήρες. Το περιβάλλον στο οποίο μεγάλωσαν έχει φανερά αντίκτυπο στην προσωπικότητά τους και την μετέπειτα συμπεριφορά τους. Παράλληλα ποτέ δεν ένιωσα ότι οι αντιδράσεις τους ήταν υπερβολικές ή out of context. Ο Matthew είναι παιδί και παρότι είναι αποφασισμένος να κάνει τα πάντα για να προστατεύσει τις αδερφές του από την μητέρα τους, εκνευρίζεται που πρέπει από τόσο μικρός να είναι ο «γονέας» και φωνάζει και θέλει να φερθεί εγωιστικά. Είναι απολύτως λογικό λοιπόν να ψάχνει απεγνωσμένα έναν ήρωα που θα τους σώσει αλλά και να φτάσει κάποια στιγμή να σκέφτεται τον φόνο ως τη μόνη λύση.
Ναι είναι προβλέψιμη σαν ιστορία, αλλά οι χαρακτήρες είναι αληθοφανείς και η συγγραφέας κάνει μια πολύ καλή εξέταση του πως είναι να μεγαλώνεις με έναν βίαιο γονέα, την συμπεριφορά άλλων ενηλίκων όπως και το τι πάει να πει «ήρωας» σε αυτές τις καταστάσεις.
Γενικώς εντυπωσιάστηκα και σίγουρα θα διαβάσω κάτι άλλο από την Nancy Werlin.
July 30, 2024
This book is absolutely beautiful. Don’t get me wrong, the whole story is pretty much a massive trigger warning. There’s abuse in a variety of forms, from physical, emotional, and mental. The abuse comes from Nikki, the mother of the children who is a narcissist and all around terrible human being. Despite how heavy the topics in this book are, the book itself and the story it tells are just beautifully wrote and so well done. It is going to pull at your heart strings, it will make you tear up. But it is so worth it! I would definitely recommend being in a good head space if any of those issues/topics are huge triggers for you, because this book does a deep dive into it so heads up!
I have absolutely nothing wrong to say about this book. Obviously Nikki as a person and a character absolutely suck. But the story, the other characters, the ending, the themes, the empowerment that comes it is just amazing. It is so well written, it truly captures such real and heavy things and it doesn’t glorify them or make it seem normal, but it paints so real and raw. Everything about it is so well done, truly I have not a bad word one about this book.
The book is written from the perspective of the main character Matthew, who is writing a letter to his youngest sister about their mother Nikki, who they suffered years of abuse from. His youngest sister Emmy was a baby and a toddler when a lot of this was happening, so Matthew is writing the letter in hopes that one day if Emmy chooses to read it she will know the terrible things they went through so she doesn’t forget how horrible Nikki is, but also remember the amazing people and things that took place in order to save the siblings. Matthew is writing down the rules of how they survived and overcame all of this.
Obviously Matthew and Callie (the middle sister) are great characters. But Murdoch, Aunt Bobbie, and Ben, oh my gosh they are amazing characters as well. This isn’t really a spoiler, but obviously a lot of bad things happen to the children at the hands of Nikki, Nikki also does terrible things to the adults around her as well. But in the end, Nikki does not win, and there is hope and freedom and happy endings. Obviously Matthew is writing from the start that they’ve made it so you know good happens, but it is a slow and long journey to get there, which he takes you on.
I absolutely loved this book. For me, it really hit me hard like my heart took a hit. But I cried happy tears at parts. The quote that stuck out the most to me is when Matthew is finally away from the abuse and living with his Aunt Bobbie. He says,
-“Aunt Bobbie occasionally snored in the bedroom next door, and it was the most comforting sound I had ever heard. The thought drifted across my mind that I wouldn’t mind, someday, if I fell in love with a girl who snored. That it would mean to peace to me.”
And that made me tear up like ugh what the characters go through and endure to get where they are is just wow.
I definitely recommend this book, it is an amazing read! It isn’t easy, it’s got trigger warnings and lots of dark heavy subjects throughout. But it is so beautifully wrote and there is happiness found and made in it. I would totally try it out!
I have absolutely nothing wrong to say about this book. Obviously Nikki as a person and a character absolutely suck. But the story, the other characters, the ending, the themes, the empowerment that comes it is just amazing. It is so well written, it truly captures such real and heavy things and it doesn’t glorify them or make it seem normal, but it paints so real and raw. Everything about it is so well done, truly I have not a bad word one about this book.
The book is written from the perspective of the main character Matthew, who is writing a letter to his youngest sister about their mother Nikki, who they suffered years of abuse from. His youngest sister Emmy was a baby and a toddler when a lot of this was happening, so Matthew is writing the letter in hopes that one day if Emmy chooses to read it she will know the terrible things they went through so she doesn’t forget how horrible Nikki is, but also remember the amazing people and things that took place in order to save the siblings. Matthew is writing down the rules of how they survived and overcame all of this.
Obviously Matthew and Callie (the middle sister) are great characters. But Murdoch, Aunt Bobbie, and Ben, oh my gosh they are amazing characters as well. This isn’t really a spoiler, but obviously a lot of bad things happen to the children at the hands of Nikki, Nikki also does terrible things to the adults around her as well. But in the end, Nikki does not win, and there is hope and freedom and happy endings. Obviously Matthew is writing from the start that they’ve made it so you know good happens, but it is a slow and long journey to get there, which he takes you on.
I absolutely loved this book. For me, it really hit me hard like my heart took a hit. But I cried happy tears at parts. The quote that stuck out the most to me is when Matthew is finally away from the abuse and living with his Aunt Bobbie. He says,
-“Aunt Bobbie occasionally snored in the bedroom next door, and it was the most comforting sound I had ever heard. The thought drifted across my mind that I wouldn’t mind, someday, if I fell in love with a girl who snored. That it would mean to peace to me.”
And that made me tear up like ugh what the characters go through and endure to get where they are is just wow.
I definitely recommend this book, it is an amazing read! It isn’t easy, it’s got trigger warnings and lots of dark heavy subjects throughout. But it is so beautifully wrote and there is happiness found and made in it. I would totally try it out!
May 31, 2007
Swift, interesting read and a fairly successful epistolary novel. Predictable plot of abusive parent, kids trying to find their own way, but likeable characters and a nice examination of what it means to be a hero.
April 12, 2008
Full Disclosure: Nancy is a good friend.
This is one of the best portrayals of a teen living with an emotionally abusive parent you will ever read. I had a knot in my stomach the whole book.
This is one of the best portrayals of a teen living with an emotionally abusive parent you will ever read. I had a knot in my stomach the whole book.
November 15, 2024
Really sad, but important book to read. Reads as a YA book. Explores themes of child abuse and the importance of adults stepping in when they suspect something.
August 10, 2020
The mother.... argggghh
September 12, 2016
This book is really something. Thought provoking, powerful, haunting.
Because the story took place over the course of five or six years, we see the steady growth of problems Matt, Callie, and Emmy endure and how they handle it.
What I loved most about this book was the realistic character development, particularly Matt's. Although he's a protective and dedicated to his sisters, he's still a kid. He shouts and gets upset and wants to leave and be selfish because he's just a kid. A kid put in the position of a parent and caretaker for his little sisters. And for the author to acknowledge this and incorporate it into the book makes it so much more real.
Definitely would recommend and I wish there would be more books like this, that accurately portray the lives and feelings of someone in this situation. Very powerful.
“Always remember: In the end, the surviver gets to tell the story.”
Because the story took place over the course of five or six years, we see the steady growth of problems Matt, Callie, and Emmy endure and how they handle it.
What I loved most about this book was the realistic character development, particularly Matt's. Although he's a protective and dedicated to his sisters, he's still a kid. He shouts and gets upset and wants to leave and be selfish because he's just a kid. A kid put in the position of a parent and caretaker for his little sisters. And for the author to acknowledge this and incorporate it into the book makes it so much more real.
Definitely would recommend and I wish there would be more books like this, that accurately portray the lives and feelings of someone in this situation. Very powerful.
“Always remember: In the end, the surviver gets to tell the story.”
March 13, 2025
well, a manipulative, premiscuous mother who physically and psychologically abuses her three children... I found some of the descriptions of the secondary characters exhausting, but I was always fascinated by the story and the role of the characters... I like to be shocked and I don't like happy endings very much, but I don't know why... in this case I wished for this mother's redemption (perhaps because of the moments of lucidity and affection, albeit very few)... in the end, the recipient of the letter... a character that I personally would have liked to have seen more development... but I really enjoyed it and I recommend it!
July 15, 2011
"Always remember: In the end, the survivor gets to tell the story."
This is the story of Matt, Callie, and Emmy, written as a letter. Emmy was too young to fully understand her past and so Matt has taken it as his responsibility to tell her about it. It's not only about an abusive mother but it involves outsiders who were dragged into it.
What did I think of the characters?
WOW. This is one of the best character developments I have read. It didn't just occur suddenly but over a realistic period of time. I LOVE Matt. I view him as a hero. With the way he protected his little sisters... It may be something he just had to do but I felt as if it were something more than that. They all had their flaws and they all had times of vulnerability. Even Nikki had a side that was understandable.
The writing, the story, just everything was so beautiful. I felt emotions the characters were going through. There were difficult topics in here. I loved how it talked about reasons why Matt didn't tell anyone about the abuse. Also, how someone can get used to an abnormal life somehow. The fact that it was written as a letter also made it different. The voice of the character was unbelievable. I actually felt as if I were listening to a teenage boy tell me his story. Definitely one of my favorites. Undoubtedly five stars! I look forward to reading more by Nancy Werlin and of this genre.
This is the story of Matt, Callie, and Emmy, written as a letter. Emmy was too young to fully understand her past and so Matt has taken it as his responsibility to tell her about it. It's not only about an abusive mother but it involves outsiders who were dragged into it.
What did I think of the characters?
WOW. This is one of the best character developments I have read. It didn't just occur suddenly but over a realistic period of time. I LOVE Matt. I view him as a hero. With the way he protected his little sisters... It may be something he just had to do but I felt as if it were something more than that. They all had their flaws and they all had times of vulnerability. Even Nikki had a side that was understandable.
The writing, the story, just everything was so beautiful. I felt emotions the characters were going through. There were difficult topics in here. I loved how it talked about reasons why Matt didn't tell anyone about the abuse. Also, how someone can get used to an abnormal life somehow. The fact that it was written as a letter also made it different. The voice of the character was unbelievable. I actually felt as if I were listening to a teenage boy tell me his story. Definitely one of my favorites. Undoubtedly five stars! I look forward to reading more by Nancy Werlin and of this genre.
June 30, 2009
Matt and his sisters, Callie and Emmy, live in a war zone. Their mother is unstable and abusive, and there are no adults to help.
I kept wondering why Matt never told someone at his school, but he explains why-- a sad commentary on our system.
The book structured as a letter that Matt writes to Emmy, explaining to her what happened during their childhoods, which Emmy was too young to remember.
For those of you who are wary (or weary) of another book about damaged families, this book does have an uplifting, hopeful ending!
I have read it twice and I am still haunted by it.
I kept wondering why Matt never told someone at his school, but he explains why-- a sad commentary on our system.
The book structured as a letter that Matt writes to Emmy, explaining to her what happened during their childhoods, which Emmy was too young to remember.
For those of you who are wary (or weary) of another book about damaged families, this book does have an uplifting, hopeful ending!
I have read it twice and I am still haunted by it.
April 13, 2010
What did I learn from this book? Well, a very obvious lesson which is the rule of survival at its basic level is self –preservation. When you’re in danger, your human instinct is to protect yourself. This story, however, showed me that as humans when we truly love someone, we’ll neglect our most basic instinct and protect those we love even if it endangers our own life.
This book is about three children who are being raised by an abusive mother. It was never quite clear if she was manic depressive, bipolar, an alcoholic or drug user. As a reader, I feel I wasn’t given enough information to determine that, but I don’t think that was the point of this book. The story revolves around Matthew, the oldest of the siblings and his struggle to keep his sisters Callie and Emmy safe from their unstable, viscous and unpredictable mother.
Truly a powerful story that’s both heartrending and daunting. When you turn the final pages, as a reader you hope that the lives of these children are not completely broken and maybe as time passes they will find peace and recovery in the aftermath of their struggle.
This book is about three children who are being raised by an abusive mother. It was never quite clear if she was manic depressive, bipolar, an alcoholic or drug user. As a reader, I feel I wasn’t given enough information to determine that, but I don’t think that was the point of this book. The story revolves around Matthew, the oldest of the siblings and his struggle to keep his sisters Callie and Emmy safe from their unstable, viscous and unpredictable mother.
Truly a powerful story that’s both heartrending and daunting. When you turn the final pages, as a reader you hope that the lives of these children are not completely broken and maybe as time passes they will find peace and recovery in the aftermath of their struggle.
September 6, 2008
A good account of a domestic life under siege. Matt and his sister Callie try to protect each other and their youngest sister from their unstable, irresponsible and clearly mentally ill mother, who can veer from manic cheer to vicious cruelty in seconds. The writing is pretty simple, but the short sentences and short chapters fit the edgy, survivalist mode of the story. I like that there is redemption (at a price), but not the kind of heroics the reader might expect.
I found it ironic (intentional?) that Matt's role model is named Murdoch ... the character reminded me of Matt Murdoch (Daredevil) from the classic Frank Miller era.
I found it ironic (intentional?) that Matt's role model is named Murdoch ... the character reminded me of Matt Murdoch (Daredevil) from the classic Frank Miller era.
September 23, 2016
I didn't really hate this book, but I didn't understand the purpose of it. It did not entertain me. Instead, it kind of bored me. Not because of the subject matter (unpredictable, diabolical abuse, which is admittedly not boring), but because of the characters. I didn't care about any of them. The book didn't make me care. Of course I would care in real life, in the sense that I'd want to help them, but as a story, it fell really flat. Flat like a pancake. Read Flowers in the Attic instead!
March 2, 2025
I see a lot of people in the reviews saying the book felt “dumbed down”… that’s literally the point. What 18 year old guy is gonna write in a sophisticated way?? I actually very much enjoyed the language aspect because it acted as a sort of palate cleanser after reading Caraval. Overall 4.5 stars. Very thoughtful and engaging.
February 11, 2012
This book terrified me, but I would say such in the most constructive way possible. Why? Well, for one, Nancy Werlin places the reader right in the center of 14-year-old Matthew's experiences in protecting his siblings from a mother from heck and back. The reader sees the desperation in his penned letters to his youngest sister Emmy chronicling the abuses they endured...and the desperation of getting out. If you're not aware of how terrifying Matthew's mother, Nikki, can be - consider some of her actions as a parent:
Driving into the opposite lane of traffic with her kids in the car, telling them that they have to declare their love for her as she swerves to avoid car, nearly killing them all.
Making the kids gorge themselves on pancakes and then taking them to a Six-Flags theme park for "fun" (where the insinuation is to make them sick and if they become sick then they're not "grateful" enough.)
Holding a knife to her son's throat while laughing.
I think that's enough on the examples, but there are more moments to be shown through the story. In sum, Nikki is brutal and psychologically manipulative to a tee.
The story introduces Murdoch, a man whom catches Matthew's eye because of the way he stands up for a kid being abused in the middle of a grocery store. Matthew sees Murdoch as a father figure, even emulates him to a degree. Unfortunately - during the brief time that Murdoch dates Nikki, he realizes what a destructive force she is and pulls out, which leaves Matthew back to square one, in a sense. The disappointment mostly sets in because Matt thinks that Murdoch can "save" them. I don't think it's a complete loss, because Matthew gets the seeds in his mind to find a way to help himself and his sisters escape the torment they endure, and it does involve fighting back by calling upon the people they learn to trust and having the strength to act beyond their mother's grasp.
The tension carries itself through the story - I felt my heart beating double time in places because the story's so resonant with its emotional turns. The feeling that one doesn't know when Nikki will snap, and if one of the kids will be caught in the crosshairs is much like walking on eggshells as one moves through the book. There's an alternate edition of "Rules of Survival," different from my edition, where the cover depicts a bowl full of glass shards, which could very well sum up how much this book can get under your skin.
There's also a quote in the midst of the book that somehow stuck with me - among many of the novel's moments, that I'll share here as taken from Matthew's words directly:
"But how come there don't seem to be any rules about when you ought to help others survive? Rules telling you when that's worth some risk to yourself?"
This hit me hard, because I think in the event of any abuse, it's important to take a stand, to tell, to talk about it. And I think one of the major themes of this novel is about gaining the strength to fight back in the face of adversity. I found it a wonderfully written, engaging story that hooked me from beginning to end, and it ranks among one of my favorite stories from Werlin.
Overall score: 4.5/5
Driving into the opposite lane of traffic with her kids in the car, telling them that they have to declare their love for her as she swerves to avoid car, nearly killing them all.
Making the kids gorge themselves on pancakes and then taking them to a Six-Flags theme park for "fun" (where the insinuation is to make them sick and if they become sick then they're not "grateful" enough.)
Holding a knife to her son's throat while laughing.
I think that's enough on the examples, but there are more moments to be shown through the story. In sum, Nikki is brutal and psychologically manipulative to a tee.
The story introduces Murdoch, a man whom catches Matthew's eye because of the way he stands up for a kid being abused in the middle of a grocery store. Matthew sees Murdoch as a father figure, even emulates him to a degree. Unfortunately - during the brief time that Murdoch dates Nikki, he realizes what a destructive force she is and pulls out, which leaves Matthew back to square one, in a sense. The disappointment mostly sets in because Matt thinks that Murdoch can "save" them. I don't think it's a complete loss, because Matthew gets the seeds in his mind to find a way to help himself and his sisters escape the torment they endure, and it does involve fighting back by calling upon the people they learn to trust and having the strength to act beyond their mother's grasp.
The tension carries itself through the story - I felt my heart beating double time in places because the story's so resonant with its emotional turns. The feeling that one doesn't know when Nikki will snap, and if one of the kids will be caught in the crosshairs is much like walking on eggshells as one moves through the book. There's an alternate edition of "Rules of Survival," different from my edition, where the cover depicts a bowl full of glass shards, which could very well sum up how much this book can get under your skin.
There's also a quote in the midst of the book that somehow stuck with me - among many of the novel's moments, that I'll share here as taken from Matthew's words directly:
"But how come there don't seem to be any rules about when you ought to help others survive? Rules telling you when that's worth some risk to yourself?"
This hit me hard, because I think in the event of any abuse, it's important to take a stand, to tell, to talk about it. And I think one of the major themes of this novel is about gaining the strength to fight back in the face of adversity. I found it a wonderfully written, engaging story that hooked me from beginning to end, and it ranks among one of my favorite stories from Werlin.
Overall score: 4.5/5
February 3, 2011
I HATED the mom in The Rules of Survival. So much that my blood pressure would literally spike while reading of the cruelties she inflicted on her children. I loathed the adults who turned a blind eye to the abuse because they just didn't want to deal with it at the time. In my book, by turning a blind eye, you become just as bad (if not worse) than the abuser. But yeah, this book had me pissed off through a vast majority of it and horrified when I wasn't pissed.
The Rules of Survival is one of those books that doesn't shy away from the abuse inflicted. It was terrifyingly real, intense, and very emotional. I was cringing every time Nikki (the cruel mom) would strike her kids either with her fists or with words. This book hits a little close to home with me because I know what it's like to live with a person whose moods shift so quickly that you have to watch out for them and are constantly walking on eggshells to make sure you don't do anything to set that person off. So, I was rooting for Matthew, for Callie, and for Emmy and couldn't wait from them to get away from that suffocating and damaging atmosphere.
While this book is all types of depressing, it is also hopeful because you know right from the first page that the children do survive and try to leave the past behind them. The fact that you know what happens from the first page, doesn't make this book any less gripping. It was entirely captivating. So much that I read this book in a little bit less than three hours. I was glued to my chair and didn't even get up once. I also loved that the The Rules of Survival was written in an epistolary format with Matthew writing to his younger sister, Emmy, whom he (along with Callie) tried to shield from the abuse as she was the youngest. I just thought that him writing to her was incredibly sweet and it brought tears to my eyes more than once.
I highly recommend The Rules of Survival. You will get upset reading this novel. It's just inevitable. But there is a sense of hope in there as well. I hope that all of the Matthews, the Callies, and the Emmys of the world get the help they need and I hope with all my heart that they too become survivors. Because Werlin is right. The survivors are the ones who get to tell the story.
The Rules of Survival is one of those books that doesn't shy away from the abuse inflicted. It was terrifyingly real, intense, and very emotional. I was cringing every time Nikki (the cruel mom) would strike her kids either with her fists or with words. This book hits a little close to home with me because I know what it's like to live with a person whose moods shift so quickly that you have to watch out for them and are constantly walking on eggshells to make sure you don't do anything to set that person off. So, I was rooting for Matthew, for Callie, and for Emmy and couldn't wait from them to get away from that suffocating and damaging atmosphere.
While this book is all types of depressing, it is also hopeful because you know right from the first page that the children do survive and try to leave the past behind them. The fact that you know what happens from the first page, doesn't make this book any less gripping. It was entirely captivating. So much that I read this book in a little bit less than three hours. I was glued to my chair and didn't even get up once. I also loved that the The Rules of Survival was written in an epistolary format with Matthew writing to his younger sister, Emmy, whom he (along with Callie) tried to shield from the abuse as she was the youngest. I just thought that him writing to her was incredibly sweet and it brought tears to my eyes more than once.
I highly recommend The Rules of Survival. You will get upset reading this novel. It's just inevitable. But there is a sense of hope in there as well. I hope that all of the Matthews, the Callies, and the Emmys of the world get the help they need and I hope with all my heart that they too become survivors. Because Werlin is right. The survivors are the ones who get to tell the story.
October 30, 2013
How can a mother love her children, but treat them like she doesn't at the same time? Most children feel safe around their mother, but not in this case. This is realist fiction story about Matthew and his two sisters that have to deal with having a dangerous mother.
There are a lot characters in this book, but without Nikki there wouldn't be a story. Nikki, the main character is the mother of her three children. She shows her love for her children differently, she's definitely dangerous and a bit insane. Nikki meets a guy named Murdoch and they began dating and her kids really liked him too. Nikki wanted them to be together and have fun, but Murdoch was beginning to realize who Nikki really is. So Murdoch broke up with Nikki. Murdoch doesn't get away from her that easily, she begins to say lies and makes up stuff to get him in trouble. This story is person vs person because Murdoch and Nikki's children have to learn how to deal with Nikki. Matthew, which is the oldest of the three is 14, Callie is 1 year younger and Emmy (their Half sister) is 6.
The book, The Rules of Survival, is a very intense book. I really enjoyed reading it, its one of those books that once you start reading, you don't want to stop. I wish that the author would have identified who Nikki was in the beginning of the story because sometimes the narrator (Matthew) would call her by her name (Nikki) and sometimes 'Mom' which confused me at first. But I really liked who the author chose the narrator to be. He had a big part in the story and explained very well how he and his sisters had to deal with his mom. This story reminds me of the book The Outsiders because both Matthew and Ponyboy are writing a story about their lives for everyone to understand what happened in their life and how it changed.
Overall, I thought this story is an amazing book and I strongly recommend it. Anyone who likes intense books, but also sad would like this. I would rate this book a 10 because it was amazing and i loved the characters and how in every page, there was something going on. Will Matt, Emmy and Callie get the family they always wanted or have to keep dealing with Nikki?
There are a lot characters in this book, but without Nikki there wouldn't be a story. Nikki, the main character is the mother of her three children. She shows her love for her children differently, she's definitely dangerous and a bit insane. Nikki meets a guy named Murdoch and they began dating and her kids really liked him too. Nikki wanted them to be together and have fun, but Murdoch was beginning to realize who Nikki really is. So Murdoch broke up with Nikki. Murdoch doesn't get away from her that easily, she begins to say lies and makes up stuff to get him in trouble. This story is person vs person because Murdoch and Nikki's children have to learn how to deal with Nikki. Matthew, which is the oldest of the three is 14, Callie is 1 year younger and Emmy (their Half sister) is 6.
The book, The Rules of Survival, is a very intense book. I really enjoyed reading it, its one of those books that once you start reading, you don't want to stop. I wish that the author would have identified who Nikki was in the beginning of the story because sometimes the narrator (Matthew) would call her by her name (Nikki) and sometimes 'Mom' which confused me at first. But I really liked who the author chose the narrator to be. He had a big part in the story and explained very well how he and his sisters had to deal with his mom. This story reminds me of the book The Outsiders because both Matthew and Ponyboy are writing a story about their lives for everyone to understand what happened in their life and how it changed.
Overall, I thought this story is an amazing book and I strongly recommend it. Anyone who likes intense books, but also sad would like this. I would rate this book a 10 because it was amazing and i loved the characters and how in every page, there was something going on. Will Matt, Emmy and Callie get the family they always wanted or have to keep dealing with Nikki?
May 12, 2008
Reviewed by Sally Kruger, aka "Readingjunky" for TeensReadToo.com
"You looked at Callie and me from over our mother's shoulder... I hoped you wouldn't try to wriggle out of the embrace, because in fact our mother seemed to be in a good mood. She was humming. Cocaine? New man? There were a few possibilities, and I didn't care which one it was. Maybe we'd have an okay evening."
Those are the words of Matthew Walsh as he tells a story of survival to his youngest sister Emmy. Matthew has decided to write down the events as they happened so his sister can read them some day. She was so young at the time, he worries that she might not understand the details of their early life in the hands of an abusive mother.
Nancy Werlin writes a powerful novel, THE RULES OF SURVIVAL, about three children and their struggle to live normal lives surrounded by chaos and abuse. Their crazed mother Nikki, most likely bi-polar or manic-depressive, has created a topsy-turvy environment for her family. One day she's treating them to a gigantic pancake feast at IHOP, and the next she disappears without a trace for days.
Matthew, Callie, and Emmy soldier on alone until help arrives in the form of a sympathetic boyfriend. He enlists the help of Matthew and Callie's father and their mother's sister to rescue the kids from the chaos.
Werlin creates a realistic and terrifying picture of life through Matthew's eyes. Readers will remember the story well after the last page. This is a book worth reading for adults as well as teens.
"You looked at Callie and me from over our mother's shoulder... I hoped you wouldn't try to wriggle out of the embrace, because in fact our mother seemed to be in a good mood. She was humming. Cocaine? New man? There were a few possibilities, and I didn't care which one it was. Maybe we'd have an okay evening."
Those are the words of Matthew Walsh as he tells a story of survival to his youngest sister Emmy. Matthew has decided to write down the events as they happened so his sister can read them some day. She was so young at the time, he worries that she might not understand the details of their early life in the hands of an abusive mother.
Nancy Werlin writes a powerful novel, THE RULES OF SURVIVAL, about three children and their struggle to live normal lives surrounded by chaos and abuse. Their crazed mother Nikki, most likely bi-polar or manic-depressive, has created a topsy-turvy environment for her family. One day she's treating them to a gigantic pancake feast at IHOP, and the next she disappears without a trace for days.
Matthew, Callie, and Emmy soldier on alone until help arrives in the form of a sympathetic boyfriend. He enlists the help of Matthew and Callie's father and their mother's sister to rescue the kids from the chaos.
Werlin creates a realistic and terrifying picture of life through Matthew's eyes. Readers will remember the story well after the last page. This is a book worth reading for adults as well as teens.
September 26, 2010
I believe the author knows about child abuse, neglect and a sociopathic parent.
Classified as Young Adult genre, the National Book Award Finalist is yet another book categorized as young adult simply because the narrator is a young child.
It is not easy to read about adult violence inflicted on children who desperately need assistance. Twelve year old Matthew Walsh desperately tries to protect his young siblings.
Their mother's mood swings, violence and cruelty is soul numbing and heartbreaking. The children live in constant fear of physical and emotional harm.
When his mother purposely veers the car into an oncoming lane of traffic, Matthew knows he must do something.
Contacting his biological father, family members and authorities only leads to more hurt and frustration. Not wanting to become involved, they look the other way.
Fate brings Murdoch into their lives. Then, when Murdoch dates their mother, they have a wonderful summer...until, Murdoch realizes the psychopathic behavior.
As Murdoch ends the relationship, he too becomes a victim of stalking and harassment from this very manipulative, sociopathic woman.
Murdoch is the only one who can help them.
While this is a dark tale, it is exceedingly well written and spot on regarding helpless children who deserve a better life.
This is a book that leads you through a dark tunnel to find hope and light at the end.
Highly Recommended
Classified as Young Adult genre, the National Book Award Finalist is yet another book categorized as young adult simply because the narrator is a young child.
It is not easy to read about adult violence inflicted on children who desperately need assistance. Twelve year old Matthew Walsh desperately tries to protect his young siblings.
Their mother's mood swings, violence and cruelty is soul numbing and heartbreaking. The children live in constant fear of physical and emotional harm.
When his mother purposely veers the car into an oncoming lane of traffic, Matthew knows he must do something.
Contacting his biological father, family members and authorities only leads to more hurt and frustration. Not wanting to become involved, they look the other way.
Fate brings Murdoch into their lives. Then, when Murdoch dates their mother, they have a wonderful summer...until, Murdoch realizes the psychopathic behavior.
As Murdoch ends the relationship, he too becomes a victim of stalking and harassment from this very manipulative, sociopathic woman.
Murdoch is the only one who can help them.
While this is a dark tale, it is exceedingly well written and spot on regarding helpless children who deserve a better life.
This is a book that leads you through a dark tunnel to find hope and light at the end.
Highly Recommended
October 27, 2013
A well-written and intense examination of living with an unstable and emotionally abusive parent. The book is written as a long letter from oldest sibling Matthew to his younger sister Emmy, containing both his recollections and resulting advice hard-won from the time when they lived with their mother.
The mother in this book is one of the most emotionally disturbing parents I've come across, almost too much so, because it was hard to think of her as a functional person. To her children she was more of a force, like a windstorm always blowing, at different speeds and in different directions, but always threatening to turn full force on them unpredictably and rip their world apart.
This book is also about the other adults who come into the children's lives, as Matthew searches for champions to help them. Not all are related by blood, notably Murdoch, whom Matthew latches onto as a potential savior. Through Matthew's eyes, the reader sees these adults cope with the difficulty in figuring out where responsibility lies when you are on the outside of that domestic disaster, looking in. There is no good way to deal with someone as difficult as Matthew's mother. Throughout the book, Matthew's determination to look after his sisters and to keep all their lives afloat is admirable, and kept my attention.
The mother in this book is one of the most emotionally disturbing parents I've come across, almost too much so, because it was hard to think of her as a functional person. To her children she was more of a force, like a windstorm always blowing, at different speeds and in different directions, but always threatening to turn full force on them unpredictably and rip their world apart.
This book is also about the other adults who come into the children's lives, as Matthew searches for champions to help them. Not all are related by blood, notably Murdoch, whom Matthew latches onto as a potential savior. Through Matthew's eyes, the reader sees these adults cope with the difficulty in figuring out where responsibility lies when you are on the outside of that domestic disaster, looking in. There is no good way to deal with someone as difficult as Matthew's mother. Throughout the book, Matthew's determination to look after his sisters and to keep all their lives afloat is admirable, and kept my attention.
January 17, 2008
This is a very good book. I would like to read books like this all the time if I could. It was a book that you could fallow along with very good. It is about these three kids that have to live with there crazy mother. The oldest boy named Matthew did all he could to keep his sisters together and stay strong for them. The main characters are Matthew, Emmy and Murdogh. Thought out this book Matthew is trying to find Murdogh a man he met in a store. He thought Murdogh was god because he stuck up in what he believed in. The genre of this book would be drama. This book took place in Boston around 1990s.
This story mainly takes place in Boston in the city. There is a big problem thought out this story, Matthew is trying to find a guy named Murdough that he has only seen one time. The mood in this story would have to be sad and depressed. People that like drama should read this book.
This story mainly takes place in Boston in the city. There is a big problem thought out this story, Matthew is trying to find a guy named Murdough that he has only seen one time. The mood in this story would have to be sad and depressed. People that like drama should read this book.
February 21, 2009
As Matt struggled for protection and the understanding that even the most trusted person can harm you, I found myself reminded constantly of my friends parents. They were schizophrenics and I wondered if this was what it was like for her. Through out the book, I wondered what this womans problem was. I still didn't figure it out. All I know is that she was mentally disturbed, and maybe bipolar. I like how the author came to the realization at the end that the letter wasn't to the sister. The letter wasn't really addressed to anyone, it was only meant as a way to get his feelings out. The brilliant story and the intense drama kept me guessing.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
June 5, 2009
Wow! This was a pretty intense book! It had my heart rate accelerated all the way through. It's about 3 kids trying to survive an unpredictable abusive mother so the content is pretty heavy, but at the same time it's a surviver story so you know it's going to be okay. It kind of reminds me of a book I once read called "Weeping Willow." Both of the books are somewhat emotionally draining but you come out of the experience on a high to see the kids come through a horrific ordeal and land on top. It also made me feel like I might now have just the tiniest sliver of insight into what a situation like that might be like.
September 28, 2008
This book is an exciting mysterious book about anything that could happen to kids. even the unspeakable!!! i loved it and want eveyone to read it!!!
July 18, 2019
This should be a movie.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 1,157 reviews