Preferred Citation: Barthes, Roland. Incidents.

Berkeley: University of California Press,

1992. http://ark.cdlib.or/ark:/1!"!"/ft#v19n9$1/
Incidents
Roland Barthes
UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA PRESS
Berkeley Los Angeles Oxford
1! The Re"ents o# the Uni$ersit% o# Cali#ornia
Preferred Citation: Barthes, Roland. Incidents. Berkeley: University of California Press,
1992. http://ark.cdlib.or/ark:/1!"!"/ft#v19n9$1/
The Li"ht o# the S&d'O&est
% ! %
&oday, '(ly 1), the *eather is splendid. +ittin on the arden bench and
s,(intin so as to obliterate all perspective, the *ay children do, - see a daisy
in the flo*erbed, flattened aainst the .eado* on the other side of the road.
&his road flo*s past like a cal. river/ occasionally traveled by a
.otorbike or a tractor 0those are the real so(nds of the co(ntry no*,
(lti.ately no less poetic than birdson: infre,(ent, they e.phasi$e nat(re1s
silence and sta.p it *ith the discreet sins of h(.an activity2, the road *ill
irriate a *hole o(tlyin district of the villae. 3or .odest tho(h it is, this
villae has its eccentric districts. -sn1t the villae, in 3rance, al*ays a
contradictory space4 5i.ited, centered, it nonetheless e6tends ,(ite far/
.ine, ,(ite classically, has one s,(are, one ch(rch, one bakery, one
phar.acy, t*o rocery stores 0- sho(ld say, today, t*o s(per.arkets2/ b(t it
also has7a sort of caprice that flo(ts the apparent la*s of h(.an eoraphy
7t*o barbers and t*o doctors. 3rance, the co(ntry of the juste milieu 4
Rather7and this on all levels of national life7the co(ntry of co.ple6
proportions.
% 8 %
9y +(d:;(est is si.ilarly e6tensible, like the daisy and like all i.aes that
chane their .eanin *ith the level of perception *here - choose to locate
the.. 3or e6a.ple, - can identify, s(b<ectively, three +(d:;(ests.
&he first is enor.o(s 0a fo(rth of 3rance2, and a st(bborn feelin of
solidarity instinctively identifies it for .e 0- have certainly never visited all
of it2: any ne*s reachin .e fro. this space to(ches .e in a personal *ay.
Upon reflection, it see.s that *hat (nifies this reat +(d:;(est is its
lan(ae: not the dialect 0for - kno* no langue d'oc 2 b(t the accent,
do(btless beca(se the +(d:;(est accent has for.ed the .odels of intonation
that .arked .y earliest childhood. - distin(ish this =ascon accent 0broadly
speakin2 fro. the other .eridional accent, that of the 9editerranean 9idi,
*hich in today1s 3rance has so.ethin tri(.phant abo(t it: a *hole folklore
of cine.a 0Rai.(, 3ernandel2, advertisin 0olive oil, le.on <(ice2, and
to(ris. s(pports it/ the +(d:;(est accent 0heavier perhaps, not so liltin2
lacks these tokens of .odernity/ only intervie*s *ith football players serve
to ill(strate it. - .yself have no accent/ fro. childhood, tho(h, - have
retained one >.eridionalis.>: - say >sociali$.e> and not >socialiss.e> 0*ho
kno*s, .aybe that .akes t*o socialis.s42.
9y second +(d:;(est is not a reion, .erely a line, a lived tra<ectory.
?henever - drive do*n fro. Paris 0- have .ade this trip a tho(sand ti.es2 -
pass @no(lA.e, *here there is a sinal that tells .e - have crossed the
threshold and a. enterin the co(ntry of .y childhood/ a pine rove on one
side of the road, a pal. tree in a co(rtyard, a certain heiht of the clo(ds that
ives the terrain the .obility of a face. &hen beins the reat liht of the
+(d:;(est, noble
% # %
and s(btle at the sa.e ti.e/ never ray, never lo* 0even *hen the s(n is not
shinin2, it is liht:as:space, defined less by the colors it i.parts to thins 0as
in the other 9idi2 than by the e.inently habitable ,(ality it co..(nicates to
the earth. - find no other *ay of sayin it: it is a l(.ino(s liht. Bo( .(st see
this liht 0- *o(ld al.ost say: hear it, so .(sical is its ,(ality2 in a(t(.n,
*hich is the soverein season of this co(ntry/ li,(id, radiant, heartrendin
since it is the last fine liht of the year, ill(.inatin each thin in its
difference 0the +(d:;(est is the co(ntry of .icrocli.ates2, it saves this
co(ntry fro. all v(larity, fro. all >rearity> too, .akin it inapt for facile
to(ris. and revealin its profo(nd aristocracy 0not a ,(estion of class b(t of
character2. ;fferin s(ch trib(te, - catch .yself *onderin: are there never
disareeable .o.ents in this +(d:;(est *eather4 ;f co(rse, b(t for .e these
are not the 0,(ite fre,(ent2 .o.ents of rain or stor./ not even the ti.es
*hen the sky is overcast/ the accidents of liht, here, see. to enender no
spleen/ they do not affect the >so(l,> only the body, so.eti.es sticky *ith
h(.idity, into6icated *ith chlorophyll, or lan(id, e6ha(sted by the *ind
fro. +pain that brins the PyrCnCes so close, so p(rple: an a.bi(o(s
senti.ent, in *hich fati(e (lti.ately has so.ethin delicio(s abo(t it, as
happens each ti.e it is .y body 0and not .y a$e2 that is stirred.
9y third +(d:;(est is even s.aller: it is the city *here - spent .y
childhood, later .y vacations as an adolescent 0Bayonne2, it is the villae to
*hich - ret(rn every year, it is the tra<ectory that (nites the t*o and that -
have covered so .any ti.es, to b(y ciars or stationery in to*n, or to .eet a
friend at the station. - have a choice of several roads/
% D %
the loner one crosses the fields thro(h a landscape hybridi$ed bet*een
BCarn and Bas,(e co(ntry/ another, a delicio(s co(ntry road, follo*s the
crest of the hills above the @do(r/ on the other side of the river, - see a
contin(o(s bank of trees, dark in the distance: these are the pines of 5es
5andes/ a third, ,(ite recent road 0datin fro. this year2 threads its *ay
alon the left bank of the @do(r: of no interest, e6cept for the speed of the
<o(rney and an occasional li.pse of the broad, entle river st(dded *ith the
little *hite sails of a yacht cl(b. B(t .y favorite road, *hich - often ind(le
.yself by takin, is the one that follo*s the riht bank of the @do(r/ this is
an old to*path, passin .any far.s and fine ho(ses. - probably like it so
.(ch beca(se it is so nat(ral, *ith that balance of nobility and fa.iliarity so
characteristic of the +(d:;(est/ yo( .iht say that, contrary to its rival on
the other bank, this is still a real route , not <(st a f(nctional .eans of
co..(nication b(t a sort of co.ple6 experience in *hich occ(r
si.(ltaneo(sly a contin(o(s spectacle 0the @do(r is a very bea(tif(l,
(nappreciated river2 and the .e.ory of an ancestral practice, that of
*alkin, of the slo* and rhyth.ic penetration of the landscape, *hich then
ass(.es different proportions/ here yo( ret(rn to *hat - *as sayin earlier,
*hich is basically the po*er this co(ntry has of evadin the i..obility of
postcards: don1t try too hard to take photoraphs: to <(de, to love it, yo(
.(st co.e and stay, so that yo( can savor the varieation of sites, seasons,
*eather, and liht.
+o.eone *ill say: all yo( talk abo(t are thins like the *eather, va(ely
esthetic or in any case p(rely s(b<ective
% ) %
i.pressions. B(t the people, their relations, ind(stries, co..erce,
proble.s . . .4 Even tho(h yo(1re <(st a resident, don1t yo( see any of that4
7- enter these reions of reality in .y fashion, that is, *ith .y body/ and
.y body is .y childhood, as history has .ade it. &his history has iven .e a
provincial, .eridional, bo(reois yo(th. 3or .e, these three co.ponents are
indistinct/ for .e, the bo(reoisie is the provinces, and the provinces are
Bayonne/ the co(ntryside 0of .y childhood2 is al*ays the Bayonnais
hinterland, a net*ork of e6c(rsions, visits, and stories. Fence, at the ae
*hen .e.ory is for.ed, - ac,(ired of those >realities> only the sensation
they afforded .e: odors, e6ha(stions, so(nds of voices, errands, chanin
liht, everythin that, *ith reard to reality, is so.eho* irresponsible and
havin no .eanin e6cept to for., later on, the .e.ory of lost ti.e 0entirely
different fro. .y Parisian childhood: filled *ith .aterial diffic(lties, that
childhood had, yo( .iht say, the harsh abstraction of poverty, and of the
Paris of that period - have virt(ally no >i.pressions>2. -f - speak of this +(d:
;(est as .e.ory refracts it *ithin .e, it is beca(se - tr(st 'o(bert1s for.(la:
>Go not e6press yo(rself as yo( feel, b(t as yo( re.e.ber.>
&hese inconse,(entialities, then, are a kind of ate*ay to that h(e
reion *ith *hich socioloical data and political analysis are concerned.
Hothin, for instance, has .ore i.portance in .y .e.ory than the odors of
that old neihborhood, bet*een Hive and @do(r, *hich is called le petit
Bayonne : all the ob<ects of petty co..erce .inled there to constit(te an
ini.itable frarance: the strin for .akin sandals 0here the *ord
>espadrilles> is not (sed2 braided by old Bas,(e .en, hot chocolate, +panish
olive oil, the con:
% I %
ested look of the dark shops and the narro* streets, the flyspecked paper of
the books in the .(nicipal library7it all f(nctioned like the che.ical
for.(la of a vanished co..erce 0tho(h this neihborhood still keeps a little
of the old char.2, or, .ore e6actly, f(nctions today like the for.(la of that
disappearance. By its s.ell - can detect the act(al chane of a certain type of
cons(.ption: the sandals 0soles pathetically lined *ith r(bber2 are no loner
hand.ade, the chocolate and the olive oil are bo(ht o(tside the to*n, in a
s(per.arket. &he odors are over and done *ith7as if, parado6ically, the
increase in (rban poll(tion drove off the ho(sehold s.ells, as if >p(rity> *ere
a perfidio(s for. of poll(tion.
@ f(rther ind(ction: in .y childhood - kne* .any fa.ilies of the
Bayonnais bo(reoisie 0there *as so.ethin ,(ite Bal$acian abo(t the
Bayonne of those days2/ - kne* their habits, their rit(als, their conversations,
their *ay of life. &hat liberal bo(reoisie *as chock f(ll of pre<(dices, not of
assets/ there *as a kind of distortion bet*een the ideoloy of that class
0frankly reactionary2 and its econo.ic stat(s 0so.eti.es traic2. +(ch
distortion is never acco(nted for by socioloical or political analysis, *hich
f(nctions as a very coarse filter and loses the >s(btleties> of the social
dialectic. Ho*, these s(btleties7or these parado6es of Fistory7even if -
co(ld not for.(late the., - felt the.: - *as already >readin> the +(d:;(est,
- covered the te6t that proceeds fro. the liht of a landscape, fro. the
lan(or of a day oppressed by the *ind fro. +pain, to a *hole type of
disco(rse, social and provincial. 3or >to read> a co(ntry is first of all to
perceive it in ter.s of the body and of .e.ory, in ter.s of the body1s
.e.ory. - believe it is to this vestib(le
% 9 %
of kno*lede and of analysis that the *riter is assined: .ore conscio(s than
co.petent, conscio(s of the very interstices of co.petence. &hat is *hy
childhood is the royal road by *hich *e kno* a co(ntry best. Ulti.ately,
there is no Co(ntry b(t childhood1s.
51FU9@H-&J, 19))
% 11 %
Incidents
% 1! %
In Morocco, not long ago . . .
&he Bartender, in a station resta(rant, ca.e o(t to pick a red
erani(. and p(t it in a lass of *ater, bet*een the coffee
.achine and the sink f(ll of dirty c(ps and sa(cers.
-n the s,(are in front of the +occo, his bl(e shirttails
flyin, an e.ble. of Gisorder, a f(rio(s boy 0*hich in this
co(ntry .eans a boy *ith all the feat(res of .adness2
estic(lates and rails at a E(ropean 0Go home! 2. &hen
vanishes. @ fe* seconds later, the so(nd of chantin indicates
the approach of a f(neral/ the procession appears. @.on the
bearers 0in relays2 of the coffin, the sa.e boy, te.porarily
s(bd(ed.
Feard the Kin1s Co(sin, *ho is very dark, pass hi.self
off as an @.erican Hero 0pretendin not to kno* @rabic2.
% 18 %
&onsorial persec(tion: Rafaelito clai.s his father c(t his hair
off *hile he *as asleep. ;ther boys say that the police crop
the. *henever they can catch the. in the street: rebellion and
repression on the level of the boys1 black hair.
&*o elderly @.erican *o.en sei$e the elbo*s of a tall
blind .an even older than the.selves and *alk hi. across the
street bet*een the.. B(t *hat he *anted, this ;edip(s, *as
.oney: .oney, .oney, not assistance.
@ delicate, al.ost entle, boy, his hands already a little
coarse, s(ddenly .akes the trierlike est(re that reveals the
yo(n p(nk: flickin the ash off his ciarette *ith the back of
a finernail.
@bder asks for a clean to*el, *hich, o(t of a reliio(s
fear of conta.ination, .(st be kept here beside the bed, to
p(rify hi.self after*ard of love.
@ venerable had<i *ith a neatly tri..ed short ray beard
and caref(lly .anic(red hands, artistically draped in a sno*:
*hite d<ellaba of e6tre.ely fine cloth, drinkin a lass of
.ilk.
% 1# %
Bet this: a stain, a faint s.ear of so.ethin, .aybe pieon
shit, on his i..ac(late hood.
@ E(ropean *o.an, no loner yo(n, heavily .ade (p,
filthy, prepostero(sly s*athed in *hatever s*ays and frays,
hair in braids, frines on cloak, ba, and skirts, passes thro(h
the +occo. &his Pend(lo(s ?onder 0- a. told by a boy *ho
doesn1t bat an eye2 is a >+oviet *itch.>
&he child - find in the corridor *as sleepin in an old
cardboard bo6, his head stickin o(t as tho(h c(t off.
Hear the +occo, a E(ropean co(ple has set (p shop,
sellin fast food for hippies. @ sin says: Hygiene is our
specialty . @nd the *o.an e.pties her ashtray in the street7
*hich is not British .
@ yo(n irl is p(nished in p(blic by her .other, a
peasant *o.an. &he da(hter screa.s. &he .other is cal.,
persistent/ she has sei$ed the irl1s hair as if it *ere a s*atch
of cloth and proceeds to deliver a series of re(lar blo*s to
her head. @ circle for.s instantly. &he .asse(r1s <(d.ent:
the .other is riht.7?hy47&he irl is a *hore 0as a .atter
of fact, he kno*s nothin abo(t her2.
% 1D %
&he child7he can1t be .ore than five7in shorts, and a hat:
knocks on a door7spits7ad<(sts his crotch.
@n old blind bear *ith a *hite beard, *earin a
d<ellaba: .aisterial, i.passive, classical, theatrical,
+ophoclean, *hile the face of the adolescent boy *ho bes for
hi. ass(.es the *hole e6pressive b(rden that s(ch a sit(ation
allo*s: aoni$ed feat(res contorted by a lo*erin po(t
display s(fferin, poverty, in<(stice, doo.: 5ookL lookL the
child1s face says, look at this .an *ho can no loner see.
&he little irls illicitly peddlin .int, le.on 0Miril2. &he
vile plainclothes cop looks very to(h/ he ab(ses the.,
br(tali$es the., b(t lets the. r(n a*ay.
Gelicio(s fantasy: a certain 9oha..ed *ith soft hands,
*ho *orks in the te6tile factory, insists that the 'e*s1 .os,(e
is dark on +at(rdays/ he points it o(t to .e: it is the ch(rch of
the +panish Cap(chins/ the 'e*s, he says, (se it 0it has been
lent to the.2 for their services.
@n adolescent black, in a *retched raincoat and a briht
bl(e so.brero, and a hippie irl, barefoot on the filthy side:
% 1) %
*alk, pass in front of the natives of the CafC Central: the boy
has picked (p a irl b(t p(blicly sacrifices to an insane
?esternis..
&he -beria official does not s.ile. +he has a pere.ptory
voice, heavy 0b(t dry2 .ake(p, very lon bloodred nails7
these nails sh(ffle the lon tickets, foldin the. *ith a
practiced and a(thoritative est(re . . .
@ pot for .int tea, .ade of ha..ered .etal *itho(t a
plastic stopper, bo(ht *ith the help of the .iddle*eiht
bo6in cha.pion of 9orocco.
+ince - had the foresiht to infor. the Kin1s Co(sin -
*o(ld be ,(ite (seless to hi., he reass(res .e: - co(ld advise
hi. abo(t investin the .illions he plans to .ake fro. his in
distillery.
@bdessala., a boarder at &Cto(an, see.s to have co.e
to &aniers this .ornin 0o(r .eetin entirely accidental2 to
b(y an antirhe(.atis. salve and a *histlin stopper for his
kettle.
% 1I %
@ yo(n black, crN.e:de:.enthe shirt, al.ond:reen pants,
orane socks, and apparently very soft red shoes.
?atchin a bearded .an dancin, the Kin1s Co(sin
infor.s .e that this is a philosopher. -n order to be a
philosopher, he says, fo(r thins are necessary: 012 to have a
certificate in @rabic/ 022 to travel a reat deal/ 0!2 to have
contacts *ith other philosophers/ 082 to be re.ote fro. reality,
for e6a.ple at the seaside.
@ yo(n black *ho looks as tho(h he *ere po*dered
*ith *hite, in a Gay:=lo parka.
@t the +occo, in '(ly, the terrace is f(ll of people. @
ro(p of hippies takes a table, one co(ple a.on the./ the
h(sband is a pl(.p blond fello* *earin nothin (nder his
overalls/ the *ife is in a lon ?anerian nihto*n/ she holds
the hand of a tiny li.p *hite irl *ho. she enco(raes to shit
on the side*alk, bet*een the les of her co.panions *ho do
not react.
Main atte.pt to find a bl(e d<ellaba. +iri1s co..ent: there
are no bl(e sheep.
% 19 %
9(stafa is in love *ith his cap. Fe *on1t take it off to .ake
love.
-n the patio of the Fotel 9in$ah, a rather haard
*o.an in a lon red dress ives .e a sharp look and asks for
>les cabinets.>
@ de.onstration of phonoloical pertinence: a yo(n
vendor in the ba$aar 0*ith an appealin lance2:
tu/ti 0yo(/y(h: non:pertinent2 eux tapis/taper 0*ant a
r(/*ant to f(ck: pertinent24
@li*a 0a ood na.e to repeat over and over2 likes
i..ac(late *hite tro(sers 0late in the season2, b(t the toilets
bein *hat they are, there is al*ays a stain on these .ilk:
*hite ar.ents.
;n the beach at &aniers 0fa.ilies, fas, boys2, so.e old
*ork.en, like very slo*, very ancient insects, rake the sand.
+ela., a veteran fro. &aniers, b(rsts o(t la(hin
beca(se he has .et three -talians *ho *ere of no (se to hi.:
>&hey tho(ht - *as fe.inineL>
% 2" %
@n old peasant in a bro*n d<ellaba 0the deep color of ras2
carries over his sho(lder a h(e braid of old:rose +panish
onions.
>Papa,> a char.in and cra$y old Enlish.an, in
sympathy ives (p his l(nch d(rin Ra.adan 0in sympathy for
the circ(.cised little boys2.
@t nine in the .ornin, a fierce yo(n fello* *alks
thro(h the +occo, a live sheep over his sho(lders, hooves tied
in front 0a pastoral and biblical attit(de2. @ little irl passes,
caressin a hen in her ar.s.
&hro(h the hotel *indo*, on the rather deserted
pro.enade 0it is still early on +(nday .ornin: in the
distance, boys are oin to the beach to play ball2, - see a
sheep and a little fantailed do/ the sheep follo*s riht on the
do1s heels/ finally he tries to .o(nt hi..
3ro. the train he has <(st left at a deserted station
0@silah2, - *atched hi. r(n do*n the road, alone in the rain,
h(in the e.pty ciar bo6 he had asked .e to ive hi. >to
keep his papers in.>
% 21 %
-n a street of +alC, so.eone says there1s oin to be a police
raid, everyone in ras .akes a eta*ay. @ boy of fo(rteen is
sittin there, a tray of old pastry in his lap. @ h(e .ilitary
police.an heads straiht for hi., knees hi. in the belly, and
snatches the tray, *itho(t stoppin or t(rnin aro(nd, *itho(t
a *ord 0the police *ill certainly eat the pastry2. &he boy1s face
is contorted, b(t he .anaes not to cry/ he hesitates, then
vanishes. 7&he presence of t*o friends e.barrasses .e and
keeps .e fro. ivin hi. t*o tho(sand francs.
@ Racinian openin: *ith a entle *illinness: >Bo( see
.e4 Go yo( *ant to to(ch .e4>
@ ood:lookin yo(n .an, *ell dressed in a ray s(it
and *earin a old bracelet, his hands delicate and clean,
s.okin a pack of red ;ly.pics, drinkin tea, speakin ,(ite
intensely 0so.e sort of official4 the kind that checks the
dossiers42, drools a tiny thread of saliva onto his knee/ his
co.panion points this o(t to hi..
Fe eneretically cleans the bidet *ith the little *ashroo.
broo.. ?hen - re.ark on this: >;nly for the bidetL>
% 22 %
@t a concert 0=er.an, of co(rse2, t*o yo(n @rabs talkin
very serio(sly in the lobby 0reali$in they are bein *atched
and therefore, in E(ropean fashion, not lookin back2/ one, in
a cord(roy <acket, *ith a pipe in his .o(th.
-n a resta(rant in Rabat, fo(r .en fro. the co(ntry7
a.on sa(ces, salads, .eats, and three:b(tton s(its7drink
s(ared .ilk and slo*ly che* bread torn off a h(e loaf.
@ certain @h.ed, near the station, *ears a sky:bl(e
s*eater *ith a fine orane stain on the front.
@ cro*d, act(ally a .ob, in the distance placards,
banners, police *histles. @ strike, a political de.onstration4
Ho, a pathetic initiation cere.ony of the 9oha..edia +chool
of Enineerin: a irl in a .iniskirt on a tr(ck, 3rench sons,
edifyin sloans: >?e Kno* ?e Fave ?ork to Go,>
>3resh.en &oday, Enineers &o.orro*.>
3arid, enco(ntered at 'o(r et H(it, c(rses o(t a bear
*ho first asks .e for a ciarette, then, havin otten it, for
.oney >so - can eat.> &his rad(al sche.e of e6ploitation
% 2! %
0tho(h banal eno(h2 see.s to o(trae 3arid: >&hat1s ho* he
thanks yo( for havin iven hi. so.ethinL> &hen, a .in(te
later, as - leave hi., ivin hi. .y *hole pack of ciarettes,
*hich he pockets *itho(t a *ord of thanks, - hear hi. askin
.e for five tho(sand francs >so - can eat.> ?hen - b(rst o(t
la(hin, he allees the di!!erence 0here everyone asserts
hi.self as different, beca(se he conceives hi.self not as a
person b(t as a need2.
@bdellatif7a vol(pt(o(s boy7pere.ptorily <(stifies the
Bahdad hanins. &he (ilt of the acc(sed is obvio(s, since
the trial *ent so fast: the case *as clear. Contradiction
bet*een the br(tality of this nonsense and the fresh *ar.th of
his body, the availability of his hands, *hich - contin(e,
so.e*hat da$ed, to hold and to caress *hile he po(rs o(t his
venef(l catechis..
Misit fro. an (nkno*n boy, sent by his friend: >?hat do
yo( *ant4 ?hy are yo( here4>7>-t1s nat(reL> 0@nother boy,
on another occasion: >-t1s loveL>2
Chella park: a tall yo(th *ith straiht hair, dressed all in
*hite, ankle boots (nder the *hite <eans, acco.panied by his
t*o veiled sisters, stares hard at .e and spits: re<ection or
continency4
% 28 %
Fard to brin back fro. Paris a >so(venir> for this boy *ho
had asked .e for one: ?hat sort of pleasant trifle can yo(
ive so.eone *ho is totally indient4 @ lihter47to liht
*hat ciarettes4 - opt for a coded, in other *ords, e6cessively
(seless, so(venir: a brass Eiffel &o*er.
@ 3rench.an, a derelict of the Protectorate 0hard*are
store2, aphasic 0rifle b(tt in the face, he sta..ers painf(lly2,
b(t ata6ic as *ell, slo*ly diin (p t*o *icks for .y b(tane
la.p, s(ddenly finds a lo(d, clear voice to screa. at his do
0*hich has done nothin b(t be there2, t*ice over: "amn
bitch!
Griss @. doesn1t kno* that sper. is called sper.7he
calls it shit: >?atch o(t, the shit1s oin to co.e no*>:
nothin .ore tra(.ati$in.
@nother boy, +la(i 09oha..ed =y.nasti,(e2, says
dryly and precisely: ejaculate : >?atch o(t, -1. oin to
e<ac(late.>
=oin do*nstairs, - hand 9(stafa 0char.in, s.ilin,
ardent, honest2 .y sandals to carry, *hile - et o(t .y key
0>Fere, hold this>2. 5ater - reali$e he has kept the.
0s(ppression of the loan2.
% 2# %
@t the bank: a blind bear staers in, his cane f(.blin
aro(nd doors, co(nters, tellers1 *indo*s. @ c(sto.er ives
hi. a coin. &he teller: >Gon1t do that, yo(1ll et the. in the
habit.>
@t 'o(r et H(it, a shoeshine boy: splendid eyes and
s.ile, dilient. Fis na.e is Gri(ish 0little dervish2. 5eavin,
already so.e distance a*ay, he ives .e a friendly *ave.
5ah(cine, at the ho(se. Fe is sittin opposite .e, inert,
placid, all .ornin. Hever have hands been in s(ch repose:
only a painter co(ld sho* it. -n his presence, - a. e6cessively
active: constantly doin so.ethin, contin(ally chanin
*hatever it is - do: *ritin, readin a ne*spaper, sharpenin a
pencil, p(ttin on another record, etc.
9(lay, the b(ildin s(per, lets .e kno* *ith an
i.perio(s est(re that *hile - a. a*ay his yo(n *ife @isha,
to safe(ard the apart.ent aainst >thieves,> *ill sleep on the
floor, here in the door*ay, on the .attin near the co(ch 0tiny
piece of .attin, the si$e of a bath.at on the tiles2.
% 2D %
&he yo(n pied#noir , a reconstr(cted petit bo(reois, *ears
his s*eater draped over his sho(lders, the sleeves knotted in
front/ he drops his car keys on the cafC table/ his accent is
harsh and ,(ick, as tho(h abr(ptly t*isted off.
&*o la* st(dents:
;ne, @bdellatif 03rench la*2, ?esterni$ed, t*o years in
+*it$erland 0apparently2, eleant 0bl(e p(llover, e6pensive
beie cord(roy s(it2, refined accent, a liar 0says he1s in second
year, *hich - kno* to be false2, ives .e the Boredo. ro(tine
0ettin o(t of this co(ntry2 and asks this ,(estion: ?hat do
yo( think of Po.pido(4>
&he other, Ha<ib, enco(ntered the ne6t day in the sa.e
place, th(s replacin the first boy, a st(dent of @rab la*,
nat(rally eleant b(t poorly dressed 0*hite &:shirt, heavy
bro*n cord(roys, *orn shoes *ith b(ckles2, *ith *ar. eyes,
cool delicate hands, not dra.ati$in his boredo., says his
vocation is to become a minister . Fe asks .e to e6plain
*hether .inisters, chanin posts, are speciali$ed,
specifically trained or not 0no critical intention2.
&he &rCsorerie CnCrale, a fortress:bank in the 3rench
style, is contin(o(sly s(rro(nded by a horde of cripples,
hoppin aro(nd like sparro*s on a l(.p of d(n: one leless
fello*, apparently the bicycle (ard, bears do*n vehe.ently
on a *retched client . . .
% 2) %
@.id the ro(p1s rather lascivio(s horseplay, one of the lyc$e
boys brins (p the latest the.e assin.ent: >Co.pare the
pedaoy of Rabelais *ith that of 9ontaine.>
@ccordin to his school.ates, F. is >very sens(al> 0a
phrase .ade all the .ore dist(rbin by the dryness of the
pied#noir accent2: in .y .ind, it beco.es F.1s na.e: Mery
+ens(al. Bet the nickna.e1s .eanin is easy eno(h to (ess:
F. lets hi.self be f(cked.
>-1. afraid -1. fallin in love *ith yo(. -t1s a proble..
?hat sho(ld - do4>
>=ive .e yo(r address.>
?hile little 9oha..ed recites the verses he has <(st
co.posed 0(nless they1re by +(lly Pr(dho..e2, - keep
thinkin ho* l(cky it is that -1ve .et hi., since -1ll ask hi. to
o b(y .e a co(ple of po(nds of to.atoes at the
neihborhood rocery.
@.al see.s enchanted by his o*n na.e: he tells it to .e
riht a*ay, fat(o(sly providin the translation 0>9y na.e is
Fope,> he says2, delihted *henever the *ord appears in a
son.
% 2I %
9oha..ed 0of co(rse2, a police.an1s son, *ants 0later on,
*hen he1s thro(h *ith the lyc$e 2, to be a police inspector:
that1s his vocation. 9oreover 0he says2: he likes football 0riht
(ard2, pinball, and irls.
&ho(h the shop *indo* is cra..ed *ith the latest
kinds of electronic e,(ip.ent, the t*o sales.en *ho. - ask
for a cassette player can1t sell .e one. &he yo(ner .an
doesn1t kno* ho* to operate the .achine he sho*s .e: a
*hole series of b(ttons pressed *ith abs(rd res(lts: lid flyin
open, batteries reversed, painf(l noises, and no .(sic. &he
other .an, the boss, b(sy *ith so.ethin or other, s(lky,
sho*s no interest and i..ediately decides that it1s the
.achine that is defective. @ll of *hich is not .(ch
enco(rae.ent to b(y a .achine for eihty tho(sand francs.
9oha..ed 5., enco(ntered one .ornin aro(nd ten, is
still half:asleep/ he <(st ot (p, he says, beca(se last niht he
co.posed so.e verses for a play he1s *ritin7>no characters,
no plot,> etc.7and stayed (p very late. @nother 9oha..ed,
the little one, told .e he *rote poetry >to keep fro. bein
bored.> -n this co(ntry poetry allo*s yo( to go to bed too
late .
@.ido(, second:year st(dent, f(t(re y. teacher,
enco(ntered one +(nday .ornin in the d(st of the flea .ar:
% 29 %
ket, poor and ood:nat(red, his raincoat too short, his bi
shoes co.in apart, his fine 9oroccan eyes, his kinky hair,
has to >reflect> for to.orro* on >9oliNre1s notion of
co.edy.>
@.ido(: - prefer spellin .y na.e *itho(t an h , since:
"oux comme l'amidon 0s.ooth as paste2
In!lammable comme l'amadou 0infla..able as tinder2.
- en<oy @.ido(1s vocab(lary: dream and burst for get an
erection and hae an orgasm. Burst is veetal, scatterin,
disse.inatin, not .oralistic, narcissistic, closed off.
Ra.adan: the .oon *ill soon be (p. ?e have to *ait
another half ho(r to .ake love: >-1. startin to drea..> >-s
that allo*ed4> >- don1t kno*.>
@., leavin the other day after havin >drea.ed,> ca.e
in his (nder*ear once he *as o(t in the street/ b(t he co(ldn1t
*ash hi.self off, as his reliion prescribes, beca(se his
boardin school rants only one sho*er every eiht days, etc.
0resent.ent transferred to the +tate2.
+ittin on the balcony, they *ait for the tiny red la.p to
be lit on the tip of the .inaret, .arkin the end of the fast.
% !" %
Every afternoon of Ra.adan, aro(nd five 0this is Hove.ber2,
the Resta(rant de la 5ibCration, in the .edina, seen fro. the
street, is transfor.ed into a hospice *ith lon ro*s of tables
*here the .en line (p to eat their so(p/ the sole *aiter on
d(ty r(ns back and forth, like a lay brother.
Haciri kno*s 3rench *ell/ to prove it, he st(ds his
disco(rse *ith forein phrases: >-ls sont sortis ce soir,
because %amadan .>
&he >head bookkeeper> 0a boy *ith an attractive face2
prono(nces sole.nly: >Civili$ation is *hen yo( kno* yo(r
rihts and are conscio(s of yo(r d(ties.> @fter *hich, like the
rest of (s, he b(rsts o(t la(hin.
&his 3riday evenin, *hen Ra.adan ends, there is still
no s.okin, beca(se *hen *e *alk off the street into a
'e*ish ho(se, the +abbath is beinnin.
3rench professors disc(ssin a doctoral candidate: *hat
teachin skills has he sho*n4 Conf(sion, e.barrass.ent.
+(ddenly, to the reat relief of all, so.eone e6clai.s: his
agr$gation lect(reL
% !1 %
&onsorials: .y shoeshine boy, bendin over .y feet, reveals
the h(e bald spot on the back of his sk(ll, *hile behind hi.,
on the side*alk, a boy in ras obsessively rakes his close:
cropped d(sty hair *ith a toy co.b.
Relation bet*een his very delicate, caref(lly roo.ed
hands 0he had <(st *ashed the.2 and the *ay in *hich he
sho*ed the., played *ith the., incorporated the., as he
talked, into the pied#noir 1s est(re repertory. Relation
bet*een the e6tre.e delicacy of his e6pensive black socks
and his *ay of stretchin his les.
@ cl(.sy, half:.ad shoeshine boy al*ays h(rls hi.self
on .e, insistently offerin: >9e, shine, Chinese> 0the
ad<ective of perfection2.
&he sa.e day:
on the one hand, the petit bo(reois st(dent st(pidly
sho*in off for the others in order to >stick the prof,> *ho
contradicts .e *ith a state.ent so ridic(lo(s that nothin
re.ains in it b(t the .essae of ill *ill/
on the other, 9(stafa, called 9(sta: hair cropped, fine
al.ond:shaped eyes, an al.ost Ro.an head e6cept for the
s*eetness of his e6pression/ born in 3e$, he is eihteen and
too poor to contin(e his st(dies/ lookin for *ork in Rabat,
% !2 %
he has taken a <ob *ith a carpenter at @kkari/ he earns thirty:
five h(ndred francs a *eek. Fis father does nothin, his
.other *orks in a te6tile factory. Fe lives *ith one of his
sisters. @ bein devoid of any hostility.
@ deter.ined little 3rench*o.an, *hose p(ny lover is
carryin h(e s(itcases, ans*ers the ticket collector 0>Bo(1ve
ot ,(ite a load there>2: >&hey1re s(ch thieves, these porters,
b(t they don1t take (s in for a .o.ent.> =ood:nat(red
la(hter of the ticket taker, tho(h he is as annoyed as the
porters.
Bo(n co.patriots7*ith irls to sho* off for7
pretendin to speak Enlish *ith an e6aerated 3rench
accent 0a *ay of concealin the fact, *itho(t losin face, that
they *ill never have a ood accent2.
9edina: at si6 in the evenin, in the street st(dded *ith
peddlers, one sad fello* offers a sinle choppin board on the
ede of the side*alk.
Behind .e, on the plane, an old 3rench lady, chattin
*ith the *o.an beside her, is doin needlepoint: a rayish
piece of b(ckra. *ith old:fashioned bo(,(ets dra*n on it.
5ater, not ettin off at the inter.ediate stop, she contin(es
% !! %
her *ork d(rin the landin and the takeoff, absol(tely static
a.id the plane1s .ove.ents: i.pert(rbable fi(re.
&*o cond(ctors, off d(ty, sittin at the bar/ the yo(ner
one hands a c(p of coffee to the older .an, *ho ref(ses *ith a
s.ile. 5ater, - reali$e that the older .an is only an assistant,
he has only one star on his cap, the yo(ner .an has three.
-n the train, there are aro(nd .e: 012 a *o.an travelin
alone, she has a &e(tonic accent 0@lsatian, +*iss42, *ears a
ponytail *ith a scarf knotted aro(nd it/ she tries to .ake
contact *ith .e, accepts a l(nch tray *hen - do, orders
nothin to drink then *ants sel&er *ater, ice, etc./ she is
readin %i!, 'erre de l$gendes / 022 a black 9oroccan *o.an,
p(st(lar/ she *ears a *ine:colored caftan and hih:b(tton
shoes and holds a kinky:haired baby in her ar.s/ 0!2 a .odest
piednoir *o.an doin so.e kind of co.plicated crochet
stitch/ 082 t*o lesbians playin cards/ 0#2 a yo(n 9oroccan,
barefoot.
=ro(p ta6i: a >dCp(tC> fro. &Cto(an 0an architect, he has
b(ilt a *hole street in 9adrid, *hich has .ade hi. a
.(lti.illionaire2 directs thro(h the dark and the rain o(r old
ta6i driver 0ray *orkshirt and yello* sk(llcap2, *ho sees
nothin, by lo(d, abr(pt, .etallic inter<ections, the *ay
% !8 %
yo( drive an old carriae horse, .oreover a perfectly docile
one.
@$ro( ?orkers1 Cooperative: a flock of little irls
h(ddled toether like birds and cheepin over h(e carpets
h(n in front of the.: a .i6t(re of aviary and classroo./
fro. this to the +adean seralio.
@t -to, lookin o(t over a h(e, noble landscape, one of
(s <okinly ives a pict(re of a naked *o.an 0fro. so.e
(layboy or other2 to yo(n 9oha, *ho sells se.iprecio(s
stones: s.iles, reserve, serio(sness, re.oteness on the boy1s
part: he is the one *ho .asters a scene initially intended to
ridic(le hi./ the other boy1s hysteria re.ains here, on the
dista!! side .
@bdelkader, a boy *ith shinin eyes and an i.perio(s
s.ile, endo*ed *ith an absol(te friendliness, .anifestin in
all its lory, beyond any for. of c(lt(re, the very essence of
charity : no other *ord for it 0&inerhir2.
&*o hippie hitchhikers. Ideology : one of the. talks to
.e abo(t the >strea. of conscio(sness.> )conomy : oin to
9arrakesh to b(y -ndian shirts, *hich they *ill sell at very
hih prices in Folland. %itual : as soon as they are in
% !# %
the back of the car, they roll ciarettes and deliberately,
.echanically pl(ne into absence 0fro. *hich they a*ake as
soon as they are offered a coffee2.
B(t also: at +ettat, - picked (p a hitchhiker t*elve years
old/ he carries a h(e plastic ba filled *ith oranes,
tanerines, and a packae *rapped in filthy *a6ed paper/
docile, serio(s, reserved, he sets none of this do*n, keepin it
on his knees, in the hollo* of his d<ellaba. Fis na.e is
@bdellatif. ;(t in open co(ntry, *itho(t a villae in siht, he
tells .e to stop and points to the plain: that1s *here he1s oin.
Fe kisses .y hand and ives .e t*o dirha.s 0probably the
b(s fare, *hich he had ot ready and *as holdin in his fist2.
*aoir#ire in 9arrakesh: fleetin conversation fro.
open carriae to bicycle: ciarette iven, rende$vo(s .ade,
the bicycle t(rns the corner and vanishes.
-n the R(e +a.arine, - *as *alkin aainst the c(rrent of
this h(.an strea.. - had the feelin 0nothin erotic abo(t it2
that each one had a &ob 0@rab arot for penis2 and that all
these &obs , as - passed the., *ere lined (p like a .ass:
prod(ced ob<ect rhyth.ically sta.ped o(t by a .old. -n this
strea., b(t dressed in the sa.e ro(h cloth, in the sa.e
colors, the sa.e ras, fro. ti.e to ti.e, a &ob .issin.
% !D %
9arrakesh so(k: *ild roses in the piles of .int.
&he little 9arrakesh schoolteacher: >-1ll do *hatever yo(
*ant,> he says, eff(sively, his eyes filled *ith kindness and
co.plicity. ?hich .eans: I'll !uc+ you , and that1s all.
@ black .an, entirely s*athed and hooded in his *hite
d<ellaba, thereby beco.es so black that - take his face for a
*o.an1s litham .
;n the road bet*een 9arrakesh and Beni:9ellal: a poor
boy, @bdelkahai., speakin no 3rench, carries a ro(nd, r(stic
basket. - ive hi. a lift for a fe* h(ndred yards. Ho sooner in
the car than he takes a teapot o(t of his basket and hands .e a
lass of hot tea 0ho* can it be hot42/ then he ets o(t, vanishes
at the roadside.
@ very poor hitchhiker .ovin fro. to*n to to*n
lookin for *ork 0very nice eyes2 tells .e a ri. story of a
ro(p ta6i 0*e1re drivin thro(h a sort of *oods2 *hose
driver *as .(rdered by fo(r passeners dis(ised as *o.en.
>B(t those <itney drivers never have .(ch .oney.> >-t doesn1t
.atter: a thief1s a thief.>
% !) %
>9onsie(r, re.e.ber, yo( sho(ld never ive a lift to a
9oroccan yo( don1t kno*,> says this 9oroccan to *ho. -1.
ivin a lift and *ho. - don1t kno*.
@ irl bein: >9y father1s dead. -t1s to b(y a
notebook,> etc. 0&he nasty part of .endicancy is the tedi(. of
the stereotypes.2
;n the road bet*een @adir and &a.ri, a person in so.e
sort of (nifor.: civilian, filthy, raed, b(t an official1s cap
and a revolver holster: he is a forest raner. Fe likes detective
stories, beca(se >he too, in a *ay, is a kind of detective 0keeps
an eye on the thefts of *ood2/ he occasionally finds hi.self
confrontin si.ilar proble.s,> etc.
&he 9oroccan st(dent, *ith slihtly b(ck teeth and a
little beard, has a Catholic scholarship fro. 5ille, beca(se
there *as a *hite father in his Upper @tlas villae. Fe is
readin 0or not readin2 ,es -leurs du mal .
3ront les tied and folded, forced to kneel as tho(h in
abase.ent, a ca.el .akes terrible efforts to et (p. @nother,
% !I %
cro(chin on the ro(nd, i..obili$ed, bleedin fro. the
.o(th, e6hibited as tho(h in the stocks, a circle of spectators
standin aro(nd it 0incl(din to(rists, one potbellied and pink,
in tiht shorts, ca.era sl(n over one sho(lder2, the ca.el
.ean*hile shriekin horribly, kickin .ith all its might . Fis
.aster, a s.all black .an, beats hi., picks (p a handf(l of
sand and thro*s it in his eyes.
=Crard, *hose father is 3rench and *hose .other is a
native *o.an, *ants to sho* .e the *ay to the =a$elle d1;r/
he spra*ls in the car in order to reveal his char.s/ then, as a
rare delicacy, a final, irresistible ar(.ent: >Bo( kno*, .y
thin, it1s not c(tL>
&hree yo(n Chle(hs, on the cliff, ask for a 3rench
lesson. >Fo* do yo( say . . .4> @ns*erin the., - reali$e that
the se6(al oran preserves a consonantal paradi.:
cul/con//ueue . &he three yo(n fello*s, instant philoloists,
are a.a$ed.
@ boy sittin on a lo* *all, at the side of the road, *hich
he inores7sittin there as tho(h for eternity, sittin there in
order to be sittin, .ithout e/uiocation :
>+eated peaceably, doin nothin,
+prin co.es and the rass ro*s of its o*n accord.>
% !9 %
@ certain 'ean, a yo(n professor7of *hat47leans over .y
book: >- co(ld never et that (y 0Pro(st2 thro(h .y head/
b(t - feel it1ll happen one of these days.> Fis friend Pierre,
d(.bfo(nded, disdainf(l, and dry 0indifferent to the ans*er2:
>@re yo( takin notes4>
@$e.(r: bo(ht a tin t(reen fro. a yo(n and toothless
vendor *ho offers to .eet .e >in his gar0onni1re .>
Fappiness at 9ehi(la: the h(e kitchen, at niht, the
stor. o(tside, the si..erin harrira , the bi b(tane la.ps,
the *hole ballet of little visits, the *ar.th, the d<ellaba, and
readin 5acanL 05acan defeated by this trivial co.fort.2
&he .arabo(t (ardian is a toothless old *o.an *ho
initiates the villae boys for fifty francs apiece.
0&he to.b is near a .(d c(be .arked *ith the n(.ber
D17this is the roo. *here the dead are *ashed/ the rave is
open: so.e .ats on the ro(nd, cloths h(n as ifts on the
reen:painted *ooden coffin (nder a faded photo of the
for.er s(ltan, a pair of sandals abandoned on a .at.2
9., sick, h(ddled in a corner on a .at, concealed his
bare and b(rnin feet (nder his bro*n d<ellaba.
% 8" %
@ bi, toothless lo(t of a fello*, his tone convinced and
passionate, *hispers abo(t the .ost ordinary brand of
ciarettes: >9ar,(ise: for .e, it1s as ood as kifL>
5ittle -. brins .e flo*ers, a real co(ntry bo(,(et: a fe*
heads of erani(., a spray of red briar roses, t*o roses, fo(r
spris of <as.ine. Fe has had this i.p(lse after the reat
pleas(re - have iven hi.: typin his na.e several different
*ays on a piece of paper that - presented hi. 0flo*ers in
e6chane for *ritin2.
Favin iven one of the. an aspirin, no* they all have
headaches and - beco.e a dispensary.
@ ro(p of boys chipped in to pay for a *hore/ one
bicycled thirty kilo.eters to find her in @., and to brin back
so.ethin to drink/ then each took his t(rn.
&his co(ntry: *here even Boy +co(ts can be
reprehensible. - ive three of the. a lift to to*n: rather
shabby, lon hair (nco.bed, caps of all kinds7and yet a fla,
bades, +co(t sal(te, phraseoloy 0>+co(ts are everyone1s
brother>2. Bare:leed, the >.aster> sported an erection, *hile
the others *ere sinin sad +co(t sons 0story of an orphan2.
% 81 %
;ver the door, in the ce.ent, the .ason @h.ed 9idace has
enraved these *ords in cl(.sy letters: CU-+-HE P@R
3;RCE. &he father didn1t *ant this e6tra kitchen, the .other
did.
&*o naked boys have slo*ly crossed the *adi, their
clothes in b(ndles on their heads.
&he peace of a d<ellaba 0fro. behind2 on a donkey, the
sin re(larly repeated in the co(ntryside.
019D92
% 8! %
At Le Palace Toni"ht ( ( (
% 8# %
- confess - a. (nable to interest .yself in the bea(ty of a
place if there are no people in it 0- don1t like e.pty .(se(.s2/
and conversely, in order to discover the interest of a face, of a
fi(re, of a ar.ent, to savor the enco(nter, - re,(ire that the
site of this discovery have its interest and its savor as *ell.
?hich .ay be *hy 5e Palace be(iles .e. - feel rela6ed
there. -t1s .odern7even very .odern4 Bet - reconi$e here
the old po*er of a(thentic architect(re, *hich is con<ointly to
enhance the .ovin, dancin bodies, and to ani.ate the
spaces and the str(ct(res.
&hese days, theaters die easily. &he hall *here - sa* .y
first Beckett is no* a arae/ others beco.e .ovie ho(ses,
ive *ay to apart.ents. 5e Palace is a resc(ed theater/ first of
all beca(se sho*s *ill be iven here/ then beca(se, fro. the
theater it oriinally *as 0and several ti.es over2, everythin
has been preserved: stae, c(rtain, balcony, orchestra
0transfor.ed into a splendid dance floor, b(t fro. *hich yo(
can see the sho*, standin or sittin on c(shions2, the reat
s*athes of red velvet: inveterate e.otion: to cli.b a staircase
and e.ere into a h(e space, crisscrossed *ith lihts and
shado*s, s(ddenly to enter, like an initiate, the
% 8D %
sacred space of representation 0even and especially *hen, as
here, the sho* is thro(ho(t the entire hall2. 'heater : this
=reek *ord co.es fro. a verb that .eans >to see.> 5e Palace
is certainly a site dedicated to lookin: yo( spend yo(r ti.e
lookin at the hall/ and, *hen yo( co.e back fro. the
dancin, yo( look so.e .ore.
5e Palace is *ell proportioned. &his .eans that you are
not a!raid here 0yo( *o(ld not .ind sleepin in it2: too s.all,
a theater is stiflin/ too bi, chillin. Fere yo( can circ(late7
(p, do*n, chanin places accordin to yo(r *hi.7a
freedo. al*ays fr(strated in other theaters, *here everyone is
assined a seat, the one correspondin to his .oney. Bet
freedo. is not eno(h to .ake a ood space. Certain
e6peri.ents have sho*n that the little *hite .o(se s(ffers
reat an6iety *hen placed in an e.pty arena lackin any point
of reference. &o feel co.fortable in a space, - .(st in fact be
able to proceed fro. one reference point to another, to inhabit
a corner as *ell as a platfor., and, like Robinson happy on
his island, to .ake .y *ay in co.fort fro. one do.icile to
the ne6t. @t 5e Palace, the fa.iliar places are .any: a salon
for chattin, bars to .eet in, to rest in bet*een dances, a
belvedere fro. *hich to a$e, above the intervals of the
bal(strades, do*n at the i..ense spectacle of lihts playin
over bodies. 3ro. each place *here - take (p .y position, -
have the delihtf(l i.pression of occ(pyin a sort of i.perial
bo6, fro. *hich - can .aster all that happens.
-s not the reat ra* .aterial of .odern art, of o(r daily
art7is it not, in this era, liht4 -n ordinary theaters, liht is
re.ote, fastened to the stae. @t 5e Palace, it is the *hole
theater that is the stae/ here liht occ(pies a deep space,
*ithin *hich it co.es alive and perfor.s like an actor/ an
% 8) %
intellient laser, *ith a co.plicated and refined .ind, like an
e6hibitor of abstract sc(lpt(res, prod(ces eni.atic traces,
*ith s(dden .(tations: circles, rectanles, ellipses, tracks,
cables, ala6ies, frines. &he re.arkable thin is not the
technoloical pro*ess 0tho(h that is rare eno(h in Paris2,
b(t the appearance of a ne* art, in its .aterial 0a .obile liht2
and in its practice/ for this is act(ally a p(blic art, in that it is
achieved a.on the p(blic and not in front of it, and a total art
0the old =reek and ?anerian drea.2, *here scintillation,
.(sic, and desire (nite. &his .eans that >art,> *itho(t
breakin *ith past c(lt(re 0the sc(lpt(re of space by laser .ay
indeed recall certain plastic efforts of .odernity2, e6tends
beyond the constraints of c(lt(ral trainin: a liberation
confir.ed by a ne* .ode of cons(.ption: *e look at the
lihts, the shado*s, the settins, b(t also *e do so.ethin
else at the sa.e ti.e 0*e dance, *e talk, *e look at each
other2: a practice kno*n to the ancient theater.
@t 5e Palace, - a. not oblied to dance in order to
s(stain a livin relationship *ith this site. @lone, or at least
so.e*hat apart, - can >drea..> -n this h(.ani$ed space, - can
e6clai. to .yself no* and then: >Fo* strane all this isL>
+trane, the old stae c(rtain, *here - read an advertise.ent
for la -rench ,ine : 5e Favre:Ply.o(th:He* Bork 0bi$arre:
in this chain of places, it is Ply.o(th that sets .e drea.in:
perhaps the ro.antic .yth of the port of call42. +trane, the
dark dancers 0backlihtin2 in the .ist that .o.entarily
covers the floor, artic(lated like p(ppets (nder a ceilin of red
and reen rays. +trane, the revolvin .irror. +trane, the
sooty, Fellenoid frescoes that r(n like a slihtly dated chastity
alon the (pper *alls.
5e Palace is not a bo2te , a >bo6,> as *e 3rench call a
niht:
% 8I %
cl(b: it collects in an oriinal site pleas(res ordinarily
dispersed: that of the theater as an edifice lovinly preserved,
the pleas(re of *hat is seen/ the e6cite.ent of the 9odern, the
e6ploration of ne* vis(al sensations, d(e to ne* technoloies/
the deliht of the dance, the char. of possible .eetins. @ll
this co.bined creates so.ethin very old, *hich is called la
-3te and *hich is ,(ite different fro. @.(se.ent or
Gistraction: a *hole apparat(s of sensations destined to .ake
people happy, for the interval of a niht. ?hat is ne* is this
i.pression of synthesis, of totality, of co.ple6ity: - a. in a
place s(fficient (nto itself. -t is by this s(pple.ent that 5e
Palace is not a si.ple enterprise b(t a .or+ , and that those
*ho conceived it .ay reard the.selves *ith ood reason as
artists.
?o(ld Pro(st have liked it4 - don1t kno*: there are no
d(chesses any.ore. Bet, leanin do*n over the dance floor of
5e Palace throbbin *ith colored bea.s and dancin
silho(ettes, divinin aro(nd .e in the shado* of levels and of
open loes an entire eb(llition of yo(n bodies b(sy in their
(ns(spected circ(its, - see.ed to reconi$e, transposed to the
.odern, so.ethin - had read in Pro(st: that evenin at the
;pCra, *here the ho(se and the bo6es for., (nder the yo(n
Harrator1s i.passioned eye, an a,(atic .ilie(, ently
ill(.inated by airettes, by lances, by <e*els, by faces, by
est(res s(estive of those .ade by (ndersea deities, a.id
*hich sat enthroned the d(chess of =(er.antes. Hothin b(t a
.etaphor after all, travelin fro. far back in .y .e.ory and
arrivin to e.bellish 5e Palace *ith a final char.: the one
that co.es to (s fro. the fictions of c(lt(re.
45G6)#H5MM)* ,
9@B 19)I
% 89 %
Soir)es *e Paris
% #1 %
*o, .e're .ell out o! it.
+chopenha(er 0on a loose sheet, before dyin2
28 @U=U+& 19)9
5ast niht.2 @t the 3lore *here - read ,e
Monde 0no ne*s2, beside .e t*o boys 0- kno*
one of the. by siht and *e even nod to each
other/ nice lookin, re(lar feat(res, b(t coarse
finernails2 have a lon ar(.ent abo(t
telephone *ake:(p service: it rins t*ice, b(t if
yo( don1t *ake (p by then, yo(1re o(t of l(ck/
all this no* by co.p(ter, etc. -n the 9Ctro,
,(ite f(ll, it see.ed to .e, of yo(n foreiners
0perhaps fro. the =are d( Hord and the =are
de l1Est2, a (itarist [email protected] folk sons2
passin the hat in one car/ - caref(lly chose the
ne6t car, b(t at ;dCon he chaned cars and ot
in .ine 0he probably *orks the *hole train2/
seein *hich, - ot riht off and ret(rned to the
car he had <(st left 0passin the hat al*ays
e.barrasses .e as a for. of hysteria and
black.ail, and an arroance as *ell, as if it
*as self:evident that s(ch .(sic or any .(sic
al*ays ives .e pleas(re2. - ot off at
+trasbo(r:+aint:Genis, the station echoin to
a sa6ophone solo/ at the bend of a corridor -
noticed a thin yo(n black prod(cin this
enor.o(s, >inconsiderate> noise. %un#do.n
character of the neihbor:
% #2 %
hood. - took the R(e d1@bo(kir, thinkin of
Charl(s, *ho .entions it/ - didn1t kno* it ca.e
o(t so close to the Bo(levards. -t *as not yet
eiht:thirty/ - delayed a little so as not to t(rn
(p e6actly on ti.e at 1"8, *here Patricia 5.
*o(ld have to co.e do*n to let .e in. &he
neihborhood *as deserted, dirty, a stron
*ind *as blo*in, raisin h(e piles of papers
and e.pty bo6es, the detrit(s of the factories of
this neihborhood/ - discovered a tiny
trian(lar s,(are 0R(e d1@le6andrie, - think2/ it
*as char.in and sordid, three old plane trees
0- sy.pathi$ed *ith their lack of air2, so.e
oddly shaped benches that looked like t(bs, and
alon one side a lo*, briht:painted b(ildin7
- tho(ht it .iht be a tiny, very shabby .(sic
hall b(t no, it *as another bo6 factory/ beside
it, on a patch of *all, a h(e .ovie poster
0Peter Ustinov flanked by t*o yo(n *o.en2/
- *ent on to the R(e +aint:Genis/ b(t there
*ere so .any prostit(tes yo( co(ldn1t really
>stroll> here *itho(t see.in to be doin
so.ethin else/ - retraced .y steps, it *as
borin, no shop *indo*s to look at, and - sat
do*n for a .in(te on one of the benches of the
little s,(are/ so.e kids *ere playin football
and sho(tin/ others *ere flinin the.selves
on top of h(e piles of paper that the *ind *as
beinnin to scatter. - tho(ht: ho* .(ch like
a .ovieL - o(ht to shoot this to et it into a
fil./ - fantasi$ed a little, i.ainin one
techni,(e that *o(ld allo* .e to fil. the
scene i..ediately 0a per!ect ca.era *here .y
second shirtb(tton is2, and another that *o(ld
.ake this s,(are *ith the *ind blo*in
thro(h it a settin *here yo( co(ld p(t a
character after the fact. 3inally - *ent to 1"8,
still .(sin, alar.ed by the ri. po*er of this
corner of Paris, passin in front of the hotel
Royal:@bo(kir 0*hat a na.eL2. @ll this *as
like so.e dis:
% #! %
inherited He* Bork neihborhood, on the
s.aller Parisian scale. @t dinner 0a ood
risotto, b(t the beef, of co(rse, not cooked at
all2, - felt co.fortable *ith friends: @. C.,
Philippe Roer, Patricia, and a yo(n *o.an,
3rCdCri,(e, *ho *as *earin a rather for.al
o*n, its (n(s(al shade of bl(e soothin/ she
didn1t say .(ch, b(t she *as there , and -
tho(ht that s(ch attentive and .arinal
presences *ere necessary to the ood econo.y
of a party 0@ndrC &. e6aerates, tho(h2. &hey
talked abo(t *hat they called >shay:do
stories> 0>@t Mictoria +tation, in Enland, - .et
a +panish irl *ho spoke 3rench>2, ar(in
e6citedly over the definition of the concept/
and abo(t Kho.eini 0- said ho* .(ch -
reretted havin only ne*s b(lletins these
days, never analyses/ no one tells (s, for
instance, *hat1s happenin to the class conflict
in -ran, .issin, on this point, 9ar62, then
abo(t Hapoleon 0beca(se - happen to be
readin Chatea(briand2. - left first, aro(nd
eleven:thirty, very eaer to take a piss and,
afraid -1d never find a ta6i and *o(ld have to
take the 9Ctro, - *ent into a Bo(levard bistro
opposite the Porte +aint:Genis/ in a corner,
h(ddled near the toilet door *hich - co(ld
scarcely open, three indefinable creat(res 0half:
pi.ps, half:,(eens2 talkin abo(t a *hore fro.
9arseille 0as far as - co(ld .ake o(t2/ a
handso.e tattooed @sian 0- sa* the bl(e:reen
tattoos belo* the short sleeves of his &:shirt2
*as standin at the pinball .achine *ith a
friend. &he bar.an and the proprietress, v(lar,
tired, kindly: - tho(ht, *hat a <obL &he ta6i
stank of dirt and so.e sort of phar.ace(tical
s.ell7yet the no:s.okin sin *as e6plicit.
-n bed, *hile =er.aine &ailleferre eaerly
propo(nded her platit(des and vanities in a
voice and a diction - love, *aitin i.patiently
for the +travinsky and +atie rec:
% #8 %
ords to end so that - co(ld hear .ore of her7in
bed, then, - lanced at the first paes of a te6t
M/* , <(st p(blished by +e(il 03.?. had told .e
abo(t it2, *onderin *hat - co(ld say and
findin7tho(h it *as nicely *ritten and
sy.pathetic7no .ore than >yeah, yeah,> then
- contin(ed, fascinated, *ith the history of
Hapoleon in M$moires d'outretombe . @fter
t(rnin o(t the liht, - *ent back to the radio
for a *hile: a so(r, fraile soprano doin an
insipid classical aria 0so.ethin like Ca.pra,
they1re all alike2, - t(rned it off.
2# @U=U+& 19)9
@t the 3lore *ith Eric 9., *e order soft:
boiled es and sa(saes, and a lass of
bordea(6. Ho one to look at. @ ray:haired,
bearded @rentinian co.es to .y table and
rene*s an invitation he says he has already
.ade to co.e, all e6penses paid, to his
Co..(nications -nstit(te/ since - a. evasive,
he s(ddenly adds so.ethin like: >?e are
politically ,(ite independent> 0- *asn1t
thinkin of that, b(t rather of the boredo. of
havin to et thro(h several dinners *ith hi.
in B(enos @ires7*e had to co..(nicate in
Enlish2. @ yo(n boy ca.e in and sat do*n
alone/ i.possible to deter.ine his nationality
0only the al.ond:shaped eyes are forein2/ his
close:fittin <acket is dark, for.al, his collar
r(.pled over a thin tihtly knotted tie, the
o(tfit finished off 0or be(n42 by pec(liar red
b(ckskin shoes. &he vendor of 7harlie#Hebdo
passes thro(h/ on the cover, in the st(pid taste
of that paper, a basket of reenish heads like
lett(ces: >2 3rancs a Ca.bodian Fead>/ and
<(st then a
% ## %
yo(n Ca.bodian b(stles into the cafC, sees
the dra*in, evidently shocked, dist(rbed, b(ys
the paper: Ca.bodian headsL G(rin all this,
Eric and - disc(ss the ,(estion of diaries/ - tell
hi. - *ant to dedicate to hi. the te6t - have
<(st *ritten for 'el 8uel , and his spontaneo(s
pleas(re to(ches .e 0the evenin1s
reco.pense2. Fe *alks .e ho.e thro(h the
R(e de Rennes, a.a$ed at the density of the
h(stlers, their bea(ty 0- have .ore
reservations2, tells .e he *as h(rt by B., *ho
has told hi. that P. p(t hi. do*n 0a net*ork
incident, in B.1s .anip(lative .anner2. -n bed,
to the .(sic of the 9utcrac+er 0broadcast to
ill(strate the notion of >.(sical fantasy>L2, -
read a little .ore of the latest Bves Havarre
0better than the others2 and M/* 0>yeah, yeah>2/
b(t these see. like chores and as soon as so.e
of .y obliations are f(lfilled - p(t the. aside
and t(rn *ith relief to Chatea(briand, the real
book. @l*ays this notion: s(ppose the 9oderns
*ere *ron4 ?hat if they had no talent4
2D @U=U+& 19)9
@t the Bonaparte, *here - a. to .eet
Cla(de '. for dinner, =Crard 5. finds .e 0-
loathe these i.pro.pt( .eetins, - prefer
bein alone in a cafC to look aro(nd, to think
abo(t .y *ork, etc.2: he is .ore do*n:and:o(t
than ever/ incoherent, abblin, s.ilin ently
(nder his c(rly hair and his bl(e eyes 0either
.yopic or astonished behind his ro(nd
spectacles2, he reports that he has iven (p his
roo. to share the apart.ent of this guy , in
hopes of havin a place to paint *hile the
Jcole des Bea(6:@rts is closed 0for the
s(..er2/
% #D %
no* it appears that this (y is cra$y, .akin
life i.possible for both of the.. Fo* old is
this (y4 &*enty:fo(r, a painter. Goes he
cr(ise yo(4 Ho, that1s <(st it 0as if that *as
*hat *as botherin =.5.2, he1s cra$y, etc. - feel
he is so absol(tely incoherent, so absol(tely
and (nconditionally needy, that it1s e6citin,
like havin a slave at one1s disposal, and s(ch
conf(sion to(ches .e, reali$in *hat <oy, *hat
relief he *o(ld have if - *ere s(ddenly to say
to hi.: all right, then, come to my place. - do
nothin of the kind, it *o(ld be cra$y. 7
Cla(de '. arrives, *earin a s*eater/ it is
rainin hard no*, and cold. ?e hesitate over
the resta(rant, inter.inably/ he enero(sly
offers .e the choice of *here to o, b(t s(ch
freedo. is like an over*hel.in present, -
don1t kno* *hat to do *ith it/ he .entions a
>.eat place> near the CollNe de 3rance/ even
tho(h the notion revolts .e and -1. afraid it
*ill be packed 0*hich - loathe in resta(rants2,
-1. so tired of *alkin in the rain that - prefer a
resta(rant so.e distance a*ay 0so *e1ll have to
take his car2/ l(ckily the .eat place is closed,
so there1s no choice b(t to o to Bofiner
0*hich is really *hat - *anted to do fro. the
start, bein ,(ite taken these days *ith this
brasserie, *hich is e6cellent b(t e6pensive2.
&he head*aiter calls .e by .y na.e, *hich -
find flatterin and e.barrassin/ the *atercress
salad is e6cellent and there is 0so.ethin -1ve
co.e to love, since .y first trips to -taly2
stea.ed fish and veetables *hich - sprinkle
*ith vinairette. Cla(de '. tells .e abo(t his
trip to &(rkey *ith his friend '.:P. -t so(nds
like niht after niht in the car, arrivin in
(nkno*n to*ns at one in the .ornin, 11,"""
kilo.eters in t*enty days, all of *hich - *o(ld
find i.possible. @t first - feel like talkin abo(t
.y *ork proble.s, b(t as al*ays *hen -
anticipate
% #) %
talkin abo(t so.ethin, - beco.e self:
conscio(s and say nothin. 3inally - dispose of
the .atter 0*hich sho(ld have constit(ted a
*hole conversation2 in a sentence. -n co.es a
ro(p of .en, t*o of *ho. are bearded fifty:
year:olds, t*ins fro. the look of the., Hat(re
.akin a second atte.pt at *hat she botched
the first ti.e/ one of the. *aves to .e7the
@rentinian fro. yesterday 0at the 3lore2/ the
other, - have so.e va(e recollection, is an art
critic. @t another table, beyond the., *e are
a.a$ed to see t*o boys eatin toether: they
look poor, badly dressed, sickly, one see.s to
be Horth @frican, the other, *earin dark
lasses, has the coarse, dirty hands of a laborer.
?hat are they doin here4 &*o .en *ho *ork
toether, spl(rin4
- a. lad that all - have to do is et ho.e
and cli.b into bed. ;n the radio, a reedy
*o.an1s voice *itho(t vibrato, borin and
>retarded,> connects a Beethoven sonata 0b(t it
is played by the <ailed @rentinian: a to(ch of
de.aoy2 to an endless recordin of so.e
'apanese speaker, then, no less endless, the
harsh voice of an -ndian siner. @ll this as if it
*ere perfectly nat(ral: cra$y, borin prora.s,
*ith obsc(re transitions. - contin(e *ith
pleas(re the M$moires d'outre#tombe , in *hich
- have reached the >F(ndred Gays.>
2) @U=U+& 19)9
:change to per!ect tense;
- *ait for Philippe +. at the +elect 0the
Co(pole is closed for @((st2/ the terrace is
cro*ded, - find the cafC (npleasant7perhaps
beca(se it isn1t one of .y ha(nts/ a *o.an by
herself7a pick(p4 Ho, she leaves *itho(t
sayin a *ord. Be:
% #I %
hind .e, a nicely pitched *o.an1s voice,
speakin to a (y *ho .(st be .akin a pass/
so.ethin abo(t a horoscope/ they are lookin
for the riht sins to .atch +aittari(s, *hich
.(st be the (y1s sin/ co.ically, they all
.atch, >even &a(r(s.> &he *aiter is talkin
*ith a c(sto.er, his attention is not to be
attracted (ntil he has caref(lly finished his
sentence, the *ay one folds one1s napkin
0Pro(stian scene: the c(sto.er1s bell rinin in
the kitchen2. ?e o to the Rotonde for dinner,
in a booth/ ne6t to (s, a very e6cited little old
fello* is .akin 0another2 pass at a yo(ner
*o.an, .issin a fe* teeth. Philippe and - talk
abo(t Chatea(briand, abo(t 3rench literat(re,
then abo(t Jditions d( +e(il. ?ith hi., -
al*ays feel e(phoric, f(ll of ideas, confidence,
and e6cite.ent abo(t *ork/ he enco(raes .y
old notion of *ritin a history of 3rench
literat(re 0accordin to Gesire2. - .ake the
.istake7a bi$arre, (nc(sto.ary idea7of
orderin a pear brandy *ith a second ciar and
e6tendin the evenin/ *hence a rather intense
sto.achache. - *alked ho.e alone. Everythin
deserted this @((st +(nday at eleven at niht.
R(e Mavin, - passed a yo(n, lovely, eleant,
elaborately .ade:(p *o.an *alkin her do/
she left a delicate scent of lily of the valley
behind her. - skirted the 5(6e.bo(r, the R(e
=(yne.er e.pty as far as - co(ld see. ;n a
kiosk, a h(e poster for a fil./ the actors1
na.es 0'ane Birkin, Catherine +paak2 printed
in h(e letters7as if they *ere incontestable
attractions 0b(t *hat do - care abo(t Catherine
+paak, do yo( think - *o(ld cross the street to
see Catherine +paak, etc.2. -n front of 8D R(e
de Ma(irard 0a sort of eneral head,(arters of
Protestant activities2, an attractive boy, *ho
oes in before - can et .(ch of a look at hi..
-n bed, *itho(t forcin .yself to
% #9 %
read the conte.porary chores, - et on *ith
Chatea(briand riht a*ay: a.a$in passae
abo(t the e6h(.ation of HapolCon on +aint
Felena.
2I @U=U+& 19)9
@l*ays this diffic(lty abo(t *orkin in
the afternoon. - *ent o(t at aro(nd si6:thirty,
for no ood reason/ in the R(e de Rennes
noticed a ne* h(stler, hair in his eyes, a tiny
earrin/ since the R(e Bernard:Palissy *as
co.pletely deserted, *e disc(ssed ter.s/ his
na.e *as 3ranOois/ b(t the hotel *as f(ll/ -
ave hi. so.e .oney, he pro.ised to be at the
rende$vo(s an ho(r later, and of co(rse never
sho*ed. - asked .yself if - *as really so
.istaken 0the received *isdo. abo(t ivin
.oney to a h(stler in adance! 2, and
concl(ded that since - really didn1t *ant hi. all
that .(ch 0nor even to .ake love2, the res(lt
*as the sa.e: se6 or no se6, at eiht o1clock -
*o(ld find .yself back at the sa.e point in .y
life/ and since .ere eye contact and an
e6chane of *ords erotici$es .e, it *as that
pleas(re - paid for. 5ater in the evenin, at the
3lore, not far fro. o(r table, another h(stler,
anelic *ith his lon hair fallin on either side
of a part do*n the .iddle of his head/ no* and
aain he lances at .e/ - a. attracted by the
*ay his *hite shirt opens do*n his chest/ he is
readin ,e Monde and drinkin a Ricard, -
think/ he doesn1t leave, finally s.iles at .e/ he
has coarse hands, *hich belie the s*eetness
and delicacy of the rest/ it is fro. his hands
that - ded(ce his h(stlerdo. 0he ends (p by
leavin before *e do/ - stop hi., beca(se he
s.iles, and .ake a va(e rende$vo(s2. Go*n
the street, a *hole noisy
% D" %
fa.ily: three or fo(r children, all hysterical
0al*ays, in 3rance2: they *ore .e o(t, even at
a distance.7Back ho.e, on the radio, - heard
abo(t the -R@ attack on 5ord 9o(ntbatten.
Everyone is o(traed, b(t no one .entions the
death of his randson, a boy of fifteen.
6rt, !1 @U=U+& 19)9
?eded into the *icker ar.chair,
s.okin .y ciar, *atchin &M . . . Rachel
and 9., *ho had one o(t for an afterdinner
stroll, have co.e back to take .e *ith the.,
the evenin is apparently so lovely. @t first -
*as annoyed: *hat, not a .in(te *itho(t
so.eone askin .e for so.ethin, even if it
*as for .y o*n oodL &hen - *ent *ith the.,
rerettin .y irritable i.p(lse, especially since
9. is so affectionate and so naive, so sensitive
to anythin lovely, as 9a. (sed to be. &he late
t*iliht *as of an e6traordinary bea(ty, al.ost
strane in its perfection: a fleecy pale ray, not
at all .elancholy, banks of .ist on the other
side of the @do(r, the road lined *ith tran,(il
ho(ses and flo*ers, a olden half:.oon,
crickets chirpin, as in the old days : nobility,
peace. 9y heart filled *ith sadness, al.ost
*ith despair/ - tho(ht of 9a., of the
ce.etery *here she *as, ,(ite close by, of
>5ife.> - felt that ro.antic i.p(lse as a certain
val(e, and - *as sad at never bein able to say
so, >al*ays *orth .ore than *hat - *rite>
0the.e of the co(rse2/ in despair too at not
feelin at ho.e either in Paris or here or
travelin: no real ref(e.
% D1 %
(aris , 2 +EP&E9BER 19)9
Back fro. Urt yesterday afternoon/ plane
cra..ed *ith a st(pid p(blic: kids, fa.ilies, a
*o.an ne6t to .e vo.itin in a paper ba, an
adolescent brinin back a pelota racket.
+l(.ped do*n in the seat, *itho(t even
loosenin .y safety belt or .akin a sinle
.ove for over an ho(r, - read so.e of Pascal1s
(ens$es , reconi$in in >.an1s .iseries> all
.y sadness, .y heavy heart at U. *itho(t 9a.
0all this really i.possible to *rite: *hen - think
of Pascal1s dryness and tension2. 5andin in
Paris, everythin *as heavy, ray. Ginner that
evenin *ith '.:5. 0B. not there2: he had .ade a
roast 0overcooked2, there *ere avocados *ith a
very black vinairette, 3rench and +panish
.elons, bread fro. 9onopri6 in a plastic ba,
and *ine in a carafe. Garla.e talked a lot 0very
fast, a little dr(nk on the *ine2/ - reali$ed after
a *hile that this *as .ore or less for .y
benefit 0to sed(ce .e2/ for a lon *hile there
has been so.e sort of disp(te bet*een (s, and
no*, for the first ti.e, there *as a positive act
of speech on his part/ b(t - *as e.barrassed by
the presence of Eric 9. and '.:5. P. ?hen -
left, early, he *anted to leave *ith .e/ in the
elevator, - kissed hi., rested .y head on his
sho(lder/ b(t *hether this *asn1t his sort of
thin, or beca(se of so.e other reticence, he
responded only va(ely. - acco.panied hi. in
the ta6i, he holdin .y hand, as far as Clichy
0crossin Paris2. @t table, *e had talked >abo(t
*o.en.> &hat evenin, e6ha(sted and
enervated, in bed 0radio i.possible:
(ltra.odern .(sic, so(nds like rabbit t(rds2 -
read the personals in ,ib$ration and the 9ouel
5bserateur : nothin interestin, nothin for
>old hands.>
% D2 %
! +EP&E9BER 19)9
&he Ge(6 9aots havin reopened, there
are fe*er people at the 3lore/ al.ost e.pty
inside. - read, lookin (p often, b(t still ettin
so.ethin o(t of Pascal1s (ens$es . Hearby, an
e6cited ro(p 0-1ve seen the. before2: fashion
,(eens and in the .iddle a tiny hysterical irl
0she is sho*in the. pict(res, talkin,
b(tterin toast, all her finers hih in the air2.
&o a ne*co.er, a pretty boy, peacockin: >Bo(
have s(ch bi feet> 0- co(ld look at nothin
else, in *hite socks2. Rena(d C. passes, all in
bl(e, eyes, shirt, everythin/ -1ve never kno*n
anyone less .etaphysical, that is, .ore >ironic>
0*ith the slihtly disareeable ,(ality this
i.plies2/ also 3ranOois 3laha(lt and 9adeleine
*ith her h(e eyes/ e.braces co.in and
oin/ she .(st think this a bit .(ch. 'ean:
5o(is P. doesn1t *ant to eat at the 3lore 0no
do(bt he resists bein seen there *ith .e, that
is, passin for >kept,> iven the difference in
o(r aes2. ?e dined, (nco.fortably, at 5a
9alNne. - kno* that @ndrC telephoned hi.
fro. FyNres and that *hat he really *ants is to
<oin hi. there, leavin toniht, in fact/ o(t of
enerosity, perversity, fatalis., seine(rial
s*aer, - convince hi. to o. Fe leaves at
nine, and - a. alone, ,(ite sad7deter.ined to
ive (p 0b(t ho* to tell hi.4 *o(ldn1t it be
sha.ef(l to stop seein hi., on the e6c(se
that . . .4 b(t that is *hat -1d like, eaer to clear
.y life of all these .esses2. - *ent back to the
3lore to contin(e .y Pascal *ith a ciar. @ tall
dark h(stler - kno* by siht ca.e over to say
hello, sat do*n, ordered a le.on <(ice and
*ater/ his na.e is Gany, he1s fro. 9arseille/
very lo* class, has diffic(lty e6pressin
hi.self. - feel he is depressed/ he1s <(st o(t of
the ar.y, *aitin to bein trainin
% D! %
for ind(strial desin/ he has no place to live
and co.plains constantly/ .oves fro. one
friend to the other, picks people (p in the
station or at friends1, etc./ if only he had a
st(dio/ in short, he1s in deep shit. 3or the rest,
typical h(stler1s lan(ae: that is, rather chaste,
in *hich the thin itself is never .entioned.
Each ti.e - insist, in order to .ake hi. say
he1s ready to o to bed *ith .e, he ans*ers:
>-1. free.> - *ake (p in the .iddle of the niht
7five o1clock/ - think bitterly and sadly of .y
relation *ith '.:5. P.
# +EP&E9BER 19)9
&ired of *orkin, - o o(t earlier than
(s(al/ not *antin to o to the 3lore, *here -
have a date at eiht o1clock *ith 3.?. and
+evero, - *ent to the terrace of the Royal:
;pCra to read ,e Monde / the cars are back, the
evenin no loner has the @((st e.ptiness -
so en<oyed. @lone, (pset, a h(stler - kno*
na.ed 'osC, a pale lon:li.bed boy *ith liht
bl(e eyes/ - avoid hi., for once aain - have
forotten to brin hi. the sined book he
asked .e for 0- can1t i.aine *ho told hi. that
- *rote2, and each ti.e he insists/ besides, -
*ant to read .y paper/ - end (p by talkin to
hi./ no* he1s *orkin at the Continental/ - ask
hi.: >-s it ood there4> thinkin of the
clientele/ he ans*ers that *hen it1s no loner
dark 0thereby tellin .e that beca(se of his
sit(ation he kno*s a fe* secrets2, it1s not very
clean, despite the .odernistic look of thins.
?ith 3.?. and +evero, dinner at Bofiner.
5eavin the resta(rant and *alkin to*ard the
car parked at the base of the stat(e of
Bea(.archais 0+evero keeps sayin that he
*ants to live here2, 3.?., in
% D8 %
one of his occasional fits of sole.nity and
affection 0- a. al*ays in dread of the.,
kno*in he is oin to talk to .e abo(t .yself
*ith all the interest of a fond '(de, and -
i..ediately feel .yself beco.in an evasive
child, chanin .y body2, (sin for transition
.y co..ent abo(t that book M/* , abo(t
*hich - had said7and *hat else co(ld - have
said7that this (niverse *as absol(tely
inaccessible to .e73.?. anno(nces that one
of these days -1ll have to e6plain .yself abo(t
the re<ected aspects of .y se6(ality 0in this
case, sado.asochis.2, abo(t *hich - never
speak/ - feel a certain irritation at this: first of
all, ,(ite loically, ho* co(ld - e6plain .yself
abo(t *hat does not e6ist4 @ll - can do is
report / and then, it1s so disco(rain, this
fashion7this do6a7of constit(tin
sado.asochis. as a nor., as nor.al, so that
any fail(re to ackno*lede it has to be
e6plained7acco(nted for. 73ro. the
beinnin of the evenin, +evero *as obsessed
*ith checkin o(t a bar he had heard abo(t in
the R(e Keller, near the Bastille7a leather bar.
+ince he never lets o of s(ch notions, *e *alk
there, 3.?. and - secretly hopin that *e find
nothin at all/ in the R(e Keller, discovered
after *e co.e (pon a char.in perspective of
apart.ent b(ildins, a ro(nd steeple 0Hotre:
Ga.e d1EspCrance42, an orane *indo*, a real
piece of -taly, the bar is arishly lit, nothin
clandestine abo(t it, sho(ts can be heard
co.in o(t of the open door, the place is filled
*ith blacks, one of *ho. is estic(latin and
threatenin the .anaer, also black. Relieved,
*e ive (p. &he niht is .ild. Back to the car,
the neihborhood f(ll of yo(n .en. - feel like
*alkin b(t .y sto.ach is botherin .e a little
0tho(h - had talked (p Bofiner, enerali$in
the necessity of oin to ood resta(rants so to
avoid bein sick2, and - don1t *ant
% D# %
the. to stop the car in front of .y ho(se7for
*ith 3.?. and +evero - never do, and habit is
like a .inor s(pereo. Co.in ho.e alone, -
cli.b the stairs and pass .y o*n floor *itho(t
reali$in it, as if - *ere ret(rnin to o(r
apart.ent on the fifth floor, as if it *ere the old
days and 9a. *ere there *aitin for .e. @n
e6ceptional oversiht that dist(rbs .e. Read in
bed the state.ents by Kho.eini:
d(.bfo(ndedL -t1s so >scandalo(s> that - don1t
dare be o(traed: there .(st be a rational
e6planation for this anachronistic .adness/ it
*o(ld be too easy <(st to la(h at it, etc. -n
short, (aradox calls.
) +EP&E9BER 19)9
@t the 3lore *here, e6ha(sted, - ar(e
painf(lly, parsi.onio(sly7perhaps beca(se
neither the te6t nor the boy, very tense tho(h
ood:lookin, attracts .e7*ith 'ean =. abo(t
his novel 0- offer a fe* co..ents to sho* that
- a. cooperative, b(t - have the i.pression he
takes the. >personally> and closes (p2, an old
9oroccan h(stler [email protected] @lao(i42, *ho. -
kne* at least ten years back and *ho since
then, each ti.e he sees .e, tells .e the story of
his life and hits .e for .oney, appears, beins
tellin .e so.e ri. tale abo(t an inheritance
0a *o.an *ho *as in love *ith hi. has died,
leavin hi. a villa in Cannes, b(t there are
proble.s, the police s(spect hi. of bein a
pi.p, etc.2, and act(ally sits do*n at o(r table
to tell the details in reater co.fort. - ref(se
0his r(deness ives .e the enery to ref(se2/ he
.akes an anry est(re and knocks over chairs
in his abr(pt depart(re. &hat evenin *e o to
the little
% DD %
Chinese resta(rant in the R(e de &o(rnon *ith
Bernard =. and his 0ne* -talian friend,
Ricardo/ at first nothin .(ch, b(t rad(ally he
appeals to .e beca(se of a kind of bodily
freshness 0hands, chest in the (nb(ttoned *hite
shirt2: the trio of Gesire inevitably for.s, B. =.
havin, by his choice, desinated .hom I
should desire. - envy their bein toether and
oin to Mienna to.orro*. - leave the.
tenderly7b(t a little bitterly, as far as -1.
concerned, since they1re oin a*ay for a lon
ti.e, and besides, in any case . . .
I +EP&E9BER 19)9
5ast niht, dinner at 5a Palette *ith
Miolette. @t the ne6t table, a black .an eatin
alone: sober, silent, discreet/ a civil servant4 &o
end his .eal he orders a yoh(rt and tea. &he
evenin is *ar., the street f(ll of people and
cars 0.onstro(s procession of .otorcycles2. -
e6tend it by headin aro(nd eleven for the
3lore, (nprofitable/ a rather *retched type sits
do*n beside .e and i..ediately beins
talkin to .e. @nnoyed, - b(ry .yself in .y
paper. Mery diffic(lt to read one1s paper in
peace.
9 +EP&E9BER 19)9
Evenin: not .(ch to tell: at Resta(rant )
*ith friends/ a ood .o.ent, despite the st(pid
environ.ent: heavily .ade:(p old *o.en,
a(dy clientele sho*in off. B(t earlier in the
afternoon of this +at(rday, a kind of insatiable
cr(isin: first of all at the Bain M, nothin:
none of the @rabs
% D) %
- kno*, no one interestin, a lot of nervo(s
E(ropeans/ the only e6ception, an @rab, not
yo(n b(t not bad, interested in E(ropeans.
@pparently *itho(t askin for .oney, he
to(ches each one1s cock, then .oves on to the
ne6t/ *ho kno*s *hat he *ants4 P(re parado6:
an @rab for *ho. so.eone else1s cock e6ists
and not only his o*n 0*hich is his eo2.
-nter.inable, proli6 .onolo(e 0not a
conversation at all2 of the o*ner, *ho
describes his disappoint.ents in a &(nisian
hotel 0*retched food and all the yo(n
&(nisians i.p(dently cr(isin hi., he
e6plains, hypocritically disapprovin2. -t
occ(rred to .e to o lookin for a h(stler in
9ont.artre/ *hich is perhaps *hy, in bad
faith, - fo(nd nothin at Moltaire. Mery stor.y
sky, heavy raindrops, a lot of cars. @t 5a H(it,
absol(tely nothin 0e6plodin the r(.or that
it1s hot at five in the afternoon2. &hen appears a
tall dark fello* *ith a rather strane, so.e*hat
delicate co(ntenance/ his 3rench is coarse, -
take hi. for a Breton/ no, his .other is
F(narian, his father a ?hite R(ssian 042, in
short a B(oslav 0very .ild, very si.ple2.
9.e 9adeleine, *ho. - had been told *as
very sick 0an infarct2, appears, h(e and
li.pin o(t of her kitchen, *here an eplant
is lyin on the table/ she introd(ces a
handso.e 9oroccan *ho is ,(ite *illin to
.ake contact and ives .e a lon stare/ he *ill
*ait in the dinin roo. (ntil - co.e back
do*n, see.s disappointed that - don1t take hi.
riht a*ay 0va(e date for to.orro*2. - leave
liht:headed, physically at ease/ still follo*in
.y notion of a diet, - b(y a loaf of very cr(sty
bread 0a sober b(t not a self:denyin diet2 and
nibble at the heel/ the cr(st cr(.bles in the
9Ctro, *hile - .ake co.plicated transfers7
b(t - persist, deter.ined to find o(t the
baro.etric press(re, @ven(e Rapp, in order to
re(late .y ne*
% DI %
baro.eter. -n the ta6i on the *ay ho.e, stor.
and heavy rain. - han aro(nd the ho(se 0eatin
so.e toast and feta2, then, tellin .yself - .(st
lose the habit of calculating .y pleas(res 0or
.y deflections2, - leave the ho(se aain and o
see the ne* porno fil. at 5e Graon: as al*ays
7and perhaps even .ore so than (s(al7
dreadf(l. - dare not cr(ise .y neihbor, tho(h
- probably co(ld 0idiotic fear of bein re<ected2.
Go*nstairs into the back roo./ - al*ays reret
this sordid episode after*ard, each ti.e
s(fferin the sa.e sense of abandon.ent.
1" +EP&E9BER 19)9
Besterday, late in the afternoon at the
3lore, - *as readin the (ens$es / at the ne6t
table, a thin boy *ith a very pale, labro(s
face, ood:lookin and strane, (nsens(al
0fake leather tro(sers2, b(sy copyin phrases
and diara.s fro. a notebook onto loose
sheets/ co(ldn1t tell if it *as poetry or
.athe.atics. &he h(stler Gany, black
eyebro*s and red s*eater, ca.e over and sat
do*n beside .e, drank a le.on <(ice and
*ater, he says his sto.ach is botherin hi.,
eatin too .(ch fast:food7and so.eti.es not
eatin at all, d(rin the *hole day/ he still has
no place to live/ his heavy hands are .oist.
;(tside the sky is stor.y, there are drops of
rain7and no ta6i, of co(rse. ?ith +a(l &., not
at all eccentric toniht, a rey s(it, a red shirt,
*e decide aainst Bofiner and o to the little
Chinese resta(rant in the R(e de &o(rnon. +a(l
see.s depressed and the evenin las, -1.
bored eno(h to be interested in o(r neihbors:
an op(lent black irl at *ho. the little
Mietna.ese *aiter .akes an
% D9 %
abr(pt pass, t*o 3rench.en, one of *ho. is
,(ite handso.e/ he has set his *allet and keys
do*n on the table beside hi./ the other .an
oes do*nstairs to the toilet t*ice/ they talk
abo(t tennis, prono(ncin *ith a stron 3rench
accent the *ords -lushing Meado.s,
<imbledon , and are drinkin rosC. Bet it *as
the evenin *hen the proposition .ade in '(ly
*as to be settled, +a(l *as to ive .e his
ans*er. B(t - no loner desired hi., - *as
tired, *itho(t even the enery to finish the
.atter. - said nothin abo(t it, as did he, of
co(rse. @fter all, that1s *hat a do(ble ans*er is.
E6cellent .ethod to erase desire: a lon:ter.
contract/ it drops of its o*n accord. -n bed,
finished Ren(cci1s "ante / a*f(lL - ot nothin
o(t of it.
12 +EP&E9BER 19)9
@t the @.erican cocktail party for
Richard +ennett 0ad.irable: a *hole socioloy
in the fact that he cannot e6press hi.self in
another1s presence, as if e6pression *ere a self:
evident hiher val(e2, *here - find Edar
9orin, 3o(ca(lt, and &o(raine, trapped 0*e
*ere told it *as a cocktail party, it *as a
debate2, - *as thinkin of nothin b(t .y date
*ith ;livier =. ?e *ent to Bofiner for dinner,
b(t it see.ed not so ood this ti.e, and not so
pleasant, .ore e6pensive, too .any people, the
cha.pane not chilled eno(h, etc. @fter*ard
*e *alked slo*ly do*n the R(e +aint:@ntoine
and the R(e de Rivoli, it *as .ild, a little
.isty, deserted 0these are dayti.e
neihborhoods2. - *as faintly apprehensive
abo(t ho* *e *o(ld say oodniht 0still
hesitatin abo(t the .anae.ent of Gesire2,
b(t at the sa.e ti.e feel:
% )" %
in rela6ed. ?e had been havin a ood
conversation, and ;livier see.ed co.fortable
0*hat fine eyes he hasL2. ?e took a c(p of tea
in a cafC on the Place d( ChPtelet/ it *as a bit
odd. &he separation *ent easily eno(h/ ;.
didn1t *ant to co.e back to the ho(se7*hich
- had anticipated, and - *as afraid of that
any*ay 0beca(se of .y desire and beca(se -
*as sleepy2/ *e .ade a date for +(nday l(nch
and separated in the Place d( ChPtelet/ he
didn1t kiss .e, b(t - *asn1t h(rt by that as
*o(ld once have been the case. - *alked ho.e,
takin the Bo(levard +aint:9ichel and the R(e
+aint:@ndrC:des:@rts/ tired as - *as, - still
*anted to see boys1 faces/ b(t so .any *ere so
yo(n that - bean to feel depressed. 5e
Ga(phin *as e.pty e6cept, at the end of the
terrace, for one black boy, *ith lon, delicate
hands, in a red <acket.
18 +EP&E9BER 19)9
3(tile Evenin. +tor.y and not at all
*ar.: rainy, hostile *ind/ - didn1t kno* ho* to
dress for s(ch *eather/ finally - p(t on a bl(e
*indbreaker, bo(ht in He* Bork, practically
brand:ne* 0- have replaced the $ip:in linin2/ it
fits badly, the sleeves are too lon and there is
no inside pocket, so - feel cra..ed *ith
ob<ects, at risk of losin the.7the *ay - lost
.y ciar case fro. this sa.e <acket/ already -
a. not co.fortable this Evenin. @t the
9(se(. of 9odern @rt 0a ri. neihborhood2,
there is an openin of Pleynet1s painters/ - a.
s(rprised to find the pict(res absol(tely
splendid, radiant, f(ll of color/ the ones that
bore .e are the ones - kno*, the theoreticians,
the sad ones 0Gevade, Cane, Ge:
% )1 %
$e($e2/ there are a lot of people, the (s(al
vernissae conversations. 0>&here1s a lot of shit
on the *alls, b(t not all,> re.arks one
entle.an in lasses, scribblin so.ethin in a
notebook: an ans*er, probably ti.id and
insincere, to t*o beefy fello*s *ho pro*l
thro(h the sho* *ith a provocative hostility.2
- see +ollers, Pleynet, then sneak off, never
able to look at an e6hibition lon. - *alk a
*hile to*ard the Pont de [email protected] *ith 5(cien
Haise: very nice, b(t - can1t .anae to en<oy
his re.arks 0tho(h flatterin, (nconditionally
so7or beca(se of that4 for this co.pels .e to
s,(ee$e (p, and - don1t like the feelin that .y
ans*ers are c(rbed2, or 0especially2 his body, a
little s*eaty, not very sens(al. - a. already
paraly$ed by the boredo. of havin to attend
the openin of Pinter1s 9o Man's ,and 7
perhaps beca(se of .y *indbreaker/ - hesitate.
-1d like so.e cha.pane, *hich - stop and
order at the bar of Che$ 3rancis/ this is a
resta(rant, and the bar is <(st for the *aiters,
*ho add (p their bills and co(nt o(t their bank
notes. - take the 9Ctro, as tho(h on .y *ay to
a chore. Bo(levard Bonne:Ho(velle,
everythin is ri./ the *eather is cold no*,
h(.anity depressed, the neihborhood f(ll of
pretentio(s and sordid little resta(rants 0*ith
overdecorated chairs2, as *ell as third:r(n or
porno .ovie ho(ses. +ince - *as fifteen
.in(tes early, dis.ayed at the idea of *aitin
in a first:niht a(dience, *ith .y <acket, not
kno*in *hat to do, fi(rin that a c(p of
coffee *o(ldn1t take .e fifteen .in(tes 0in
cafCs as ri. as these2, - *alked do*n the
Bo(levard/ *hich *as fatal to Pinter, for -
decided not to retrace .y steps 0act(ally: no
conse/uence 2/ - *anted to o to the 3lore, b(t
it *as too early and *o(ld have .ade too lon
an evenin/ - looked for a .ovie: nothin
appealed, or else the fil. had already be(n/
then -
% )2 %
fo(nd one theater *here they *ere sho*in
Pialat1s fil. abo(t kids passin their
baccalaur$at 0'.:5. had said it *as *onderf(l,
in his *ay, of co(rse, *hich .eans aside fro.
any esthetic criterion, and accordin to
affective:intellect(al i.pressions that concern
hi.self e6cl(sively2. &he fil., tho(h perfect
and <(stifyin all the praise it had received, *as
instantly painf(l to .e: - don1t at all en<oy
realistic descriptions of social >.ilie(>/ there
*as a sort of >yo(th> racis. 0one felt
absol(tely e6cl(ded2, it *as ab(sively hetero,
and - don1t like that very conte.porary sort of
.essae in *hich yo( have to sy.pathi$e *ith
do*n:and:o(ters 0li.ited hori$on of the yo(n,
etc.2, and *here the *hole (niverse is idiotic:
the arroance of the derelict, so .(ch for o(r
ti.es. 5eavin the theater and headin to*ard
the ;pCra, ro(ps of yo(n people/ a irl says
so.ethin <(st like *hat - had been hearin in
the fil.. &he fil. is >tr(e,> since it contin(es in
the street. @rrivin at +aint:=er.ain, <(st
above 5e Gr(store, a very handso.e *hite
h(stler stops .e/ - a. st(nned by his bea(ty,
the delicacy of his hands, b(t, inti.idated and
e6ha(sted, - clai. - have an appoint.ent. @t
the 3lore, beside .e, t*o 5aotians, one too
effe.inate, the other attractive in his boyish
*ay: so.e friendly conversation, b(t *hat (se
is it4 0+till e6ha(sted, - *ant to read the paper.2
&hey leave. Painf(lly - .ake .y *ay ho.e,
da$ed by a .iraine, and contin(e Gante, after
takin an ;ptalidon.
1) +EP&E9BER 19)9
Besterday, +(nday, ;livier =. ca.e for
l(nch/ *aitin for hi., *elco.in hi., - had
.anifested the solicit(de that
% )! %
(s(ally indicates that - a. in love. B(t as soon
as l(nch bean, his ti.idity or his re.oteness
inti.idated .e/ no e(phoria of relation7far
fro. it. - asked hi. to co.e and sit beside .e
on the bed d(rin .y nap/ he ca.e *illinly
eno(h, sat on the ede of the bed, looked at an
art book/ his body *as very far a*ay7if -
stretched o(t an ar. to*ard hi., he didn1t
.ove, (nco..(nicative: no obliinness/
.oreover he soon *ent into the other roo.. @
sort of despair overca.e .e, - felt like cryin.
Fo* clearly - sa* that - *o(ld have to ive (p
boys, beca(se none of the. felt any desire for
.e, and - *as either too scr(p(lo(s or too
cl(.sy to i.pose .y desire on the./ that this
is an (navoidable fact, averred by all .y
efforts at flirtin, that - have a .elancholy life,
that, finally, -1. bored to death by it, and that -
.(st divest .y life of this interest, or this
hope. 0-f - consider .y friends one by one7
e6cept for those *ho are no loner yo(n7it
has been a fail(re each ti.e: @., R., '.:5. P.,
+a(l &., 9ichel G.7R. 5., too brief, B. 9. and
B. F., no desire, etc.2 Hothin *ill be left for
.e b(t h(stlers. 0B(t then *hat *o(ld - do
*hen - o o(t4 - keep noticin yo(n .en,
i..ediately *antin to be in love *ith the..
?hat *ill the spectacle of .y *orld co.e to
be427- played the piano a little for ;., after he
asked .e to, kno*in at that very .o.ent that
- had iven hi. (p/ ho* lovely his eyes *ere
then, and his entle face, .ade entler by his
lon hair: a delicate b(t inaccessible and
eni.atic creat(re, s*eet:nat(red yet re.ote.
&hen - sent hi. a*ay, sayin - had *ork to do,
kno*in it *as over, and that .ore than
;livier *as over: the love of one boy.
% )8 %
Gesiner: +andy Grooker
Co.positor: ?ilsted Q &aylor
&e6t: 11/1!.# 3o(rnier
Gisplay: 3o(rnier
Printer: 9alloy 5ithoraphin
Binder: 9alloy 5ithoraphin
Preferred Citation: Barthes, Roland. Incidents. Berkeley:
University of California Press, 1992.
http://ark.cdlib.or/ark:/1!"!"/ft#v19n9$1/