I do not own twilight or the characters and all rights to Stephanie Meyer, who I believe

deserves a Nobel Prize for creating Bella and Edward.

This is just what I think went through Edward’s mind when Bella saved him
Based on “new moon’ by the wonderful Stephenie Meyer

When Bella saves Edward in Volterra- Edward’s

POV
The clock tolled again and for the first time since I left my reason for existence, I
welcomed memories of her, any memory good or bad. I remembered the day we
first met, our first date, when I told her the truth about what I was, our first kiss,
our second kiss, the day I broke her heart.
“She’s Gone,’ I heard Rosalie’s voice in my head.

I saw Bella, my Bella, my perfect angel’s face in my head, at the bottom of the
ocean, still, white and cold. Then an emotion hit me, it was so strong that if I
hadn’t been a vampire, I’d have to take a step back. It was anger mixed with regret
and for the first time since I met Bella, I wanted her to be a vampire.

At that very moment I would have traded anything ad everything for her to be a
monster like me. She had asked for it time and time again. I had refused her, if I
hadn’t, my angel would be here with me now, she’d be here in my arms, alive if
that’s what we were. I wouldn’t have to restrain myself and Bella and I would be
together… forever.
The thought though it could never be true, made me happy, for the first time in
months. Happiness it made this whole dying thing pretty bearable.

But I’d messed up now she’s at the bottom of the ocean, dead. Venom burned in
my mouth as I thought the word. I once again let my mind give me all the
memories of Bella before I died or whatever it is we do.

As I started unbuttoning my shirt I thought of my “family” I did love them but my

love for Bella was so much stronger, I could, would, kill all of them, Rosalie,
Emmet, Alice, Jasper, Carlisle and Esme slowly and painfully if it meant that I
could bring Bella back, even just for a day.

For once, as I was standing here about to kill myself for Bella, the centre of my
universe, I knew there had to be a God, this love I had for my Bella couldn’t just
exist. Someone had created it, love, meaning, sorrow and pain. I prayed to this
God that I didn’t believe existed until half a second ago, to protect Bella in heaven
and make her happy. I wouldn’t follow her to heaven, but maybe because I tried to
be a good… vampire, God would let me say my goodbye to Bella and let me
apologize for hurting her and maybe he’d let me hold her a last time, it was a long
shot but the thought kept me sane. This pain was becoming unbearable. I stepped
forward, eager to have this pain be over.
“No, Edward, don’t look at me,” my perfect angel begged. Suddenly something
slammed into me. It would be nice to believe, my human Bella would still care for
me after all these months. I wished she’d care whether I lived, my half life or
whether I didn’t. It was too much t ask of her. I knew it was because I left her.
Surprisingly my throat started burning, a burned I had longed for, for the last
miserable period of my half life. I didn’t remember taking the step, I must have
though or my angel wouldn’t be with me now, here in my arms.

“Amazing Carlisle was right,” I mused, mostly to myself.

“Edward,” she gasped, “You have to get back into the shadows, you have to
move!” she begged me

This was odd, she sounded out of breath and panicky. I opened my eyes. Her
chocolate brown eyes, as deep as the ocean, were panicked. She was trying to
shove me back, I didn’t know why, I didn’t care either. She was with me and that
was what counted. I looked at her, she looked different in a way, she was much
thinner and paler and her hair looked lifeless. Yet she was the most beautiful
creature in the whole universe. I brushed my hand across her soft cheek

“I can’t believe how quick it was didn’t feel a thing- their very good” I mused to
myself again. I kissed her head softly, the burn was stronger now.

Death, that hath sucked the honey of thy breath, hath had no power
yet upon thy beauty,’ I quoted Romeo in the tomb.

The clock tolled again, it sounded far away, somewhere in the distance.

“He wanted to die, end his immortality, for this plain human,” I heard someone’s
thought.

How strange even here in the after life, I could hear people’s thoughts. I ignored it
and turned back to my angel.

“You smell exactly the same as always so maybe, this is hell, I don’t care I’ll take
it,” I breathed into her hair. I don’t care where we were as long as we were
together, never to be separated again.

“I’m not dead,” she said, there was alarm in her voice, “And neither are you!
Please Edward, they cant be far. We have to move!!” she close to yelled, still out
of breath tough. She struggled in my arms.

‘What was that?” I asked my brow furrowed in confusion.

“We’re not dead, not yet anyway! We have to move before the Volturi-”

I got it then, Bella was really her, the voice I had heard was Demitri’s. I pushed her
back, as softly as I could under the circumstances and stood protectively in front
of her.
“She’s does smell good, hmm… no Aro gave us exact orders, Heidi will be back soon.
Although, she might make a good snake, oops, he can hear me,”

I heard Demitri’s thoughts. Venom burned in my mouth, there was no way in hell, I
was letting him near, my Bella.

“Edward, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have told Rosalie. I’m sorry I brought her here, but if you
die, she would have definitely killed herself, we didn’t do her any good when we left and
I had to try and save you to. Okay, try and stay calm. Bella’s best friend is a werewolf,
got it, plus Victoria and Laurent were back. The wolves killed Laurent but Victoria ran
off.”

I heard Alice’s thoughts as she ran to meet us. Laurent? Werewolves? Victoria?
My Bella was definitely a magnet for danger and I was never ever letting her out of
my sight ever again.