ed981112.

qxd 25/11/98 21:14 Page 1 (1,1)

Issue 948 - Weekly Thursday 12th October 1998

UWE’s
Brutal remains top UniS
Blunder of employment league
Under the weather
Under the influence he 1998 Sunday Times league table of UK univer- top of the league albeit closely followed by Imperial, LSE

Under the wheel ! T sities has been compiled covering all 98 institu-
tions. Every university is ranked according to their
total score gathered from marks on teaching quality,
and York, one of the newer campus universities estab-
lished in the 1960’s.

research quality, A-level entry requirements, firsts and Surrey’s increasing reputation is all the more impressive
student from Oxford Brookes Football First Squad 2:1’s awarded and student to staff ratio. UniS came a very when you examine the statistics of our nearest and dearest

A suffered a broken leg at the hands of the University

of West England 1st Football team. The student
was unable to play at the BUSA match as he was feeling
respectable 26th overall and once again we topped the
graduate employment record. The Sunday Times reports
“Never has the point of university seemed so clear. True
to its heritage as a technical college up to 1966, Surrey is
sporting and social rivals. Our tally of firsts easily outdid
the likes of Southampton and Kent; our research topped
that of Exeter and Brunel and the teaching quality was
considerably higher than Bristol, Bath or King’s London.
under the weather. However, ever the martyr, he wanted to
in the business of training students for jobs.” UniS have now overtaken the likes of Royal Holloway,
support his beloved team and so went armed with a couple Reading, Exeter and Sussex. Unfortunately in any league
of tinnies down to the pitch to cheer them on. Other interesting statistics are that we take 12.5% of our table there is always a deeply contested battle to avoid the
students through clearing, 54.43 % of our students achieve embarrassment of bringing up the rear and being classed as
At the end of the game he followed his team into the bar to Firsts or 2:1’s and the average A-level entry requirement is “The lowest form of University Life”. This years Will
reflect on the game. At the bar the UWE lads began sug- 20 points (1996). We were rated excellent in Business and Carling award goes to Luton University. The towns
gesting that Oxford Brookes were a bunch of woosies both management, civil engineering, electrical and electronic image has seemingly rubbed off on the university although
on the pitch and at the bar (Well.....). Not one to let down engineering, materials technology, music and psychology. the Union is apparently busy with a pint at just £1.40.
the side, the lad in question rose gallantly to the challenge Cambridge and Oxford took their expected places at the

Will Rugby Players Soon be reaching the heights?

and began showing UWE how to win a boat race and
indulge in a number of ‘white spirits’. Although victorious,
this behaviour nevertheless had a detrimental effect on the
or the first time, Rugby Union is set to become a degree course.

F
lad, and his legs started to bow beneath him. Around this
time the UWE team were departing, but it seemed that our Following on from the introduction in recent years of Golf Green
lad had departed too. In fact it seemed that he had disap- Keeping, Brewing, Knitwear and Belgian degree courses Rugby
peared. His team mates could see him nowhere - not unusu- Studies and Leisure Management is now on offer to next years students at
al for footy lads though, as on a Wednesday their eyes do Buckinghamshire Chilterns University College. The College which through
its publications announces that “Students come in all shapes and sizes...and
well to focus on skirts, let alone anything else.
ages”, is set for a role as an integral training ground for future professionals.
The course is on offer to 15 to 20 male or female students, wanting careers
The lad did appear later though. Unfortunately it was cour- in sports administration or with the real potential to make a go of it in pro-
tesy of an ambulance. The UWE blokes had kidnapped the fessional sport. The students will be taught the managerial and administra-
inebriated lad and bundled him on to their minibus. tive side of Rugby Clubs as well as learning about contracts, marketing and
Nearing Cheltenham, they thought better of their actions, sponsorship.
but not being bothered to return the lad, they dumped him Rugby Union has only recently turned into a professional sport and is enjoy-
on the side of the dual carriageway, where he later stumbled ing a resurgence following the early nineties exodus of players to the riches
into the path of a BMW. of Rugby League. The course is being run jointly with Saracens Rugby Club,
the winners of last years Allied Dunbar Premiership league. Students will
This was very nearly a tragic accident, but, due to his ‘flop- train with Saracen players, make full use of the facilities at the Vicarage
piness’ he was very lucky to escape with a broken leg, and Road ground, analyse matches and improve fitness. Students will also get the
some minor injuries. benefit of seasonal membership to the club. The course has an 8 UCAS
Gemma Herbertson points or 2 A-Level equivalent entry requirement. When asked for his com-
ment on the course, Alex Langley, Sports Officer and former UniS Rugby
Captain said with a touch of regret, “Only six years too late!”

News 2 n Features 3 n Societies 4 n Music 5 n Entertainments Guide 7 .

Features 8 n Notices & Personals & Crossword 9 n Health & Advice 10 n Surrey Pride 11
h t t p : / / w w w . s u r r e y. a c . u k / U n i o n /
ed981112.qxd 25/11/98 21:14 Page 2 (1,1)

2 News Thursday October 12 1998 n

SRC - Nestle with Nestle on a Free Wednesday? News in Brief

Charlie Kray In Court US President Bill Clinton is
he latest SRC meeting discussed a range of to be free from scheduled academic work, making it

T topics: constitutional change, Union sponsor-

ship, technology and elections.
An issue from the last meeting re-emerged. Food
free for students personal development in such forms
as Society activities, the Skills Development Training
program and sport.
Again
Charlie Kray, half of the infamous
Kray twins has been at the appeal
believed to have asked his military
advisors for options on attacking
Iraq, in response to their constant
belligerence over weapons inspec-
giants Nestlé want to revamp the Union’s vending court this week. He was hoping to tions.
machine area, providing hot/cold drinks and food, Last Thursday, the 5th of November, with a total overturn his conviction for drug In September "The Americans said
and of course advertising for themselves. The Union cross section of students present, a Motion was car- dealing, for which he is serving 12 that this time they would not allow
and NUS are hesitant about accepting the offer They ried unanimously (i.e. with no opposition!) to make years in prison. Judges decided things to drag on." a senior officer
allege that Nestlé unfairly target their baby milk prod- Keeping Wednesday Afternoons free for sport and that the gangster was guilty of the said. UK Minister of Defence
ucts at new mothers in poor countries. They claim other student activities a key Policy of the Students’ organising the cocaine deal, worth George Robertson arrived in
that using the baby milk means that the mothers and Union, meaning that it will be a priority in the £39 million, but gave him permis- Kuwait on Sunday pledging that
children loose out in the long run while Nestlé makes Students representation at all relevant meetings. A sion to appeal against the sentence the crisis would not be allowed to
a profit. The SRC felt it was unfair to make a deci- lecturer in the audience commented that many staff he received. stretch into the new year.
sion about the vending area, without giving Nestlé a also supported the idea. They too want time set aside
chance to respond to these allegations. The mater was for research, seminars etc. She suggested that their
Unable to work, UN weapons
adjourned to the next meeting. support would strengthen the Unions argument.
Wednesday Afternoon’s Free for Societies, recre-
Wembley To Loose It's inspectors began to leave Iraq this
week as Iraq threatened to renege
ational activities and Sport!!by Alex Langley Following a short question and answer session, elec- Twin Towers on some or all of it's agreements
tions were held for Union Official positions. As a The Wembley skyline could be with the UN. Iraqis are angry that
Being the Sports Sab, people automatically see my result Natasha Forder, Caroline Hamer, Celine dramatically changed under pro- the sanctions imposed on them at
interest in Wednesday afternoons as being purely Gordine-Wright and Elizabeth Sweetland were elect- posals to revamp the home of the start of the Gulf War are still in
sports related. Naturally I am highly driven to make ed to the post of Women's Officer, Environmental English soccer. Wembley effect, with no end in sight.
all those who wish to participate in sport able to. But Officer, Returning Officer and General Secretary Stadium's managers have admitted
I totally recognise the need for Wednesday afternoons respectively. that the famous twin towers, which While the recent UN security coun-
mark the end of the "Wembley
Fireworks Feedback Parliament Lobby - 12th Way" could be sacrificed as part of
cil meetings has set no deadline for
ovember 5th saw students piling onto the Iraq's compliance with its
November
N grass by the golf ball to witness another suc-
cessful Union Fireworks display. There US have organised a national lobby of
the sites refurbishment.
English Heritage which advises the
Government on historic building
demands, various factors, such as
weather and logistics mean that
were big bangs, shooting stars, oohs and aahs as well
as the obligatory hot dogs, burgers, tea, coffee and a
toffee apple if you were lucky enough to get one.
The RAG committee raised money by selling
N Parliament due to take place this Thursday at
Westminster. This crucial event will demon-
strate that NUS and Students’ Unions will continue
ssaid that the Grade II listed towers
should be moved rather than
knocked down, as Wembley is
transformed into a 88,000 seater
offensive action against Iraq could
be just days away.

Given the past record of such

to fight fees and highlight the ongoing crisis of stu- threats however Iraq can be forgiv-
sparklers and the Silly Committee entertained (per- dent hardship. The Student rights Charter will also venue.
plexed?) us with their interesting choice of DJ. (It’s en for not taking them too serious-
be a focus for the day, raising the profile to members ly. Time will tell.
a long time since I heard “The Power of Love” by of parliament. We will be presenting our charter Jailed Takes Jail To Court
Huey Lewis and the News!). Hatted, scarfed, gloved sign-up book to our local MP, Nick St. Aubyn, and An inmate at Holloway women's US Navy Pilot Killed 20
and fleeced students made their way down to the speaking to him about the issues raised within it and jail is to challenge prison bosses in
grass to watch the display under a full moon and a how they affect specifically students at Surrey, who the high court. The 24 year old
Tourists In Low Flying
great night was had by all. live in an expensive area where accommodation is Disaster
prisoner want to care for her new
very hard to find. Each Union has been allocated 3 born child in the gaol's mother and Captain Richard Ashby was flying
The only down-side is that we completely ruined the seats in the Grand Committee Room at the Houses of a military jet when it severed the
baby unit. Authorities however
grass and that area is where Her Majesty the Queen Parliament, and been given information on “green- wire holding a mountainside cable
want to take the baby into care as
will be standing when she visits the University in card’ing” MP’s (when you call your MP out of their car. The gondola fell 400ft killing
they say the mum is unpredictable.
December to open the new Space Centre. Anyone office). Other speakers at the lobby include Andrew all of its 20 passengers. The marine
interested in turf replacement would be welcome to Pakes - NUS president, Phil Willis - Lib Dem Higher aviator is facing court marshal on
help out! Thanks go to the University Safety
Row Over NHS Waiting
Education Spokesperson and Paul Mackney - charges of involuntary manslaugh-
Officers, Alan Roy, Ian Lipp and Stage Crew, Silly Lists ter, negligent homicide, dereliction
General Secretary of NATFE.
people, RAG and all the students who brought a fire- Political spin doctors have been of duty, destroying military and
work. See you next year! doing battle as the latest health ser- civilian property and obstruction.
vice statistics were announced this
Silly
The terrifying incident occurred
week. Prime Minister Tony Blair last February in Italy near Aviano.
boasted that the number of patients The accusations of obstruction
Well, the fireworks night was a big success. on waiting lists for operations has stem from allegations that a video
and whoever that dj was, we should certainly fallen for the 5th month in a row. tape of the event has been withheld
get him back.All I have to say is sorry to the He hailed the figures as proof of from the prosecutors. The plane's
people who missed it, because of my timing how New Labours NHS policies navigator has also been charged
error. but hey! if you’d come down the union are working. and the rest of the crew are expect-
b4 and bought along a firework, then you Health Department figures say the ed to be called as witnesses.
wouldn’t have missed the display, and the numbers of patients waiting to be
display would have lasted longer because we admitted to NHS hospitals fell by
Arts Editor Daniel Jones Christmas Winterval is
would have had your firework too. 29,100 in September.
Coming
That’s how these things work. but never mind Opposition MP's pounced on the The latest phrase to be altered in
Nick Walsh
([email protected])
now. For those people who came early wording of the Governments state- the name of political correctness
enough, there was some of the best music to ments. They claim that the statis- has been coined by Birmingham
be heard on a wednesday this year, and a pret- tics are being massaged to make City Council. "Christmas" has been
ty good firework display... and veggie burg- them look good for the voters. deemed to be insulting to the large
ers! (thanks to stage crew for the fireworks, They say that the criteria for col- Asian community of Britain's sec-
and harriet for the burgers!) Next time its a lecting the data has been changed ond city. "Christmas" and it's asso-
childrens party with jelly and ice cream and that while the numbers on ciated Christian orientated celebra-
(sorry, not veggie jelly... but the ice cream waiting lists has fallen, the average tions have been dropped, in favour
will be!) All you have to do is bring along a waiting time has grown. of a non religious celebration:
present for Ruth, Esther, Nuala or Kyle. all "Winterval"
the presents will be distributed to local chari- UN vs. Iraq Will It Ever
ty shops for The decision has outraged
End? Christian church leaders and been
re-sale, if suitable. As the latest UN/Iraq crisis contin- greeted with incredulity by nearly
ues military sources have hinted everyone else. Undeterred,
Something musical for Kyle, something that decisive strikes against Iraq
sheepy for Esther, Something dangerous for Brummie councillors began to pro-
could be much closer than first mote their 42 day programme of
Nuala and something Ruthie for Ruth thought. Winterval festivities.
ed981112.qxd 25/11/98 21:15 Page 3 (1,1)

nThursday October 12 1998 Features 3

The real Chancellors Challenge The Tabloids go far too again

e will probably never know what for- had stood up straight away and said that if Ron

T
hose of you who came to Student Council
last week will have heard that we’re plan-
ning a big refurb of the Chancellor’s com-
plex. As you may know, the building work
you’re in for a drink later on in the evening.
We’re hoping to provide a flexible all-day menu
and change our policy of no lunchtime drinking
without food to reflect student demand and
W mer Welsh secretary Ron Davies did
on Clapham Common, but the
response from many of the newspapers was sim-
Davies was gay there was clearly nothing to be
ashamed of.

which is beginning adjacent to the Hall match up with what the high-street pubs are ply short-sighted bigotry. The newspapers decid- Instead New Labour’s ever so modern leadership
Restaurant will form an extension to the restau- doing. ed Davies was gay and that he should be shamed approach threw Davies to the wolves. Your cor-
rant and provide a “Senior Common Room” for for this. Sun columnist Richard Littlejohn wrote, respondent here comes from Wales and knows
staff members to eat and entertain guests. This The Story So Far... “In the Commons Tony Blair labelled the Tories that Ron Davies was the peoples choice to head
provision is currently being met by the Table ‘the party of BSE and E coli’, “ I suppose that the new Welsh Assembly. Ron Davies, knowing
D’Hote facility in Chancellor’s, and as the Union makes Labour the party of AIDS and hepatitis he faced the prospect of a storm of prejudice
We wanted to employ a proper design consultant
will lose this business when the new University B.” from the papers, resigned from the cabinet.
to do this project for us and choose a company
restaurant opens, we thought it was the perfect The Sunday People’s front-page headline was Labour is due to release this week a document
who is used to working with Students’ Unions.
opportunity to give Chancellor’s a really good “Shamed MP Has Gay Sex Disease”. along the lines of ‘family values’. The Tories did
Having called round some of our colleagues, we
face lift and adapt what we do to cater more The News of the World encouraged voters in this in the past with their back to basics cam-
invited about 7 design consultants to visit us and
directly for students. Caerphilly “to throw Ron Davies on the slag paign, but ended up looking stupid as many of
let us have a look through their portfolios. We’ve
heap where he belongs”. their cabinet ministers tales of affairs etc. came
now short-listed 3/4 and engaged the
The University paid for an independent Catering Tory ex cabinet minister Norman Tebbit wrote to out of the woodwork.
University’s Estates and Buildings department to
Consultancy to come and do a full report on what the Telegraph demanding gays should be kept out
help us through the tendering procedures and act
the Union currently does and make suggestions of the key government jobs in case they “do each In Wales, Ron Davies was dumped, and now
as our advisors. We’re aiming to select a compa-
as to what we could do in the future. That report, other favours”. Labour leaders want to fiddle the prospective
ny by the end of November and look forward to
combined with the data from the strategic plan Comment by Nick Walsh leader of the Welsh Assembly. The people want
showing you the designs. The building work is
commissioned last year suggested that the Union Rhodri Morgan, but his opponent Alun Michael
scheduled for the Easter vacation so that we can
should provide an all-day cafe/bar facility open The aforementioned comments are misjudged appeals more to the party, some would say more
open for business during and after exam time,
from 9am until 11pm, serving food all day. The and out of line. They come from those who sycophantic to Tony Blair. The same thing is
when Chancellor’s is such a popular option. This
interior should provide a comfortable and mod- would like us to live under the shadow of a nar- happening in London, where the Labour party
will also give us some practice at running a new
ern environment, with dedicated smoking and row “family” morality defined by an elite of are trying to find ways of preventing Ken
venture before the start of the new academic year
non-smoking areas, well ventilated by air condi- politicians, bishops and out of touch, hypocritical Livingstone from being Mayor of London. In the
and the influx of 1500 Nursing and Midwifery
tioning and extraction equipment. The kitchen bosses. 1980’s Ken became a hero in London on the
students from the EIHMS building.
and cellar areas will also be modernised to ser- It took a while for New Labour to stand up for Greater London Council, but he upset Margaret
vice new eating and drinking arrangements. The themselves on this issue when Gordon Brown Thatcher and she then abolished the GLC in
This is a really exiting project and we’re far
basic idea is that you could come in at 9am and finally went on television defending Agricultural 1985. The people should be able to say who they
enough down the line now to say that it will hap-
have coffee and a pastry, have a full pub lunch minister, Nick Brown, and saying no-one would want to have voted in, in instances like this,
pen and when it does, it will be fantastic! Keep
and a beer at 1 pm and have a plate of Nachos or lose their job over their sexual persuasion. It rather than be prevented to from by unfair elec-
coming along to Student Council so that you’re
snacky food to share with your mates when would have caused less of a fuss if Tony Blair tion procedures.
informed of developments.

Societies Standing Sits Letter

n response to last weeks article by Marcus devote four paragraphs to his shredding of the

I
he creation of this new societies page the new Technology Officer. He has reported that

T stems from a Union initiative to promote

the status of non sporting student activi-
ties. Over the past few years Surrey's sports clubs
UCS are willing to provide such services. See
UCS for details!
Mayers, (NUS? What has NUS ever done for
us?) we would like to raise a few points of
our own even though by doing so we are
NUS values as on paragraph certainly wasn’t
enough to give full coverage to the benefits it
offers to students. ALL students.
have surged head with their on field achieve- Ewen outlined how the committee would oper- labelling ourselves [quote] ‘lonely and obses- We would like to draw attention to some of these
ments and standards of organisation. The time ate. All societies would have a chance to report sive’. Our primary complaint is that he wrote it in points. The main role of NUS is to span the gap
has come for our societies to do the same. or ask any questions. These might be about bud- his capacity as External Affairs Officer, although between the student voice and the decision mak-
gets or any other relevant issues. The agenda will he says at the end of the article that his views are ers of our country. Of course there are disap-
To accomplish this the Societies Standing be dictated by the members and Union staff in not supported by USSU. Having written such an pointments (introduction of tuition fees springs
Committee has been created. Convened by attendance will be the President, Treasurer and inflammatory article we think he should have to mind) but there are also successes and the
Internal Affairs Officer, Ewen Ferguson, the Internal Affairs Officer. made it clear from the outset that these were his NUS is the only organisation that represents us at
committee will be modelled on the very success- personal opinions. that level. We wonder how many people are
ful Sports Standing Committee. Every society Again borrowing from the Sports model, Particularly offensive was his comment that aware that NUS helps ensure education in this
must send along a representative to the meetings Executives will be elected to be responsible for a Communists and Yogic Flyers are ‘crackpot country is of high quality and accessible to all.
which will be held near the end of each month. group of like minded societies. For example the organisations’. Even if Mr. Mayers does not e.g. Student Rights Charter. It offers free legal
The idea is to provide a forum for societies to existing Arts and Ents chairperson will be the entirely agree with their ideals, to dismiss them assistance to both student unions and students
discuss both common and specific problems. Executive for the music societies. However there so readily seems unfair. (One is left wondering if when state legal aid is not available. In fact, one
These can then be solved collectively and lessons is scope for new Execs to be created. The Execs he has ever read their manifestos?) phone call to the NUS and you can get advice on
learned by everyone. All societies need to recruit would help co-ordinate their groups efforts, rep- issues ranging from employment to homeless-
and advertise for instance. Groups which have resent their group on an Executive Committee His general slating of the NUS conference seems ness and entertainment to health.
been successful at these areas can share their and be the Union representative at their societies rather harsh. Has he ever attended? Perhaps if he
ideas to help those that are struggling. AGM's. were to attend this year, his interesting views Mr. Mayers obviously has strong views on this
could be taken into consideration and make a dif- topic and we hope we’ve put forward our side of
It will also give impetus to any changes that soci- The status of student societies can only improve ference. the argument a little more clearly. We are in
eties need as a whole. An example of this was under this new system and it seems to be work- Although we too agree that for NUS to be affili- agreement with Mr. Mayers last concluding para-
seen in the first meeting two weeks ago. ing already. Hopefully societies will eventually ated to a particular political party is unsatisfacto- graph but why did he leave it so long before he
Communicating with members is often a chal- be able to join sport as the "Part Of The Pride". ry, it is to be expected when we only have one balanced the article? Mr. Mayers interest in NUS
lenge. The use of e-mail would be a great help. The prospects will be even greater next year, socialist party of any status in this country and is evident and we hope to see him standing for
Designing posters etc also has to be done on when societies will get a whole sabbatical officer the idea of unions bringing power to the masses conference next year.
members own computers or on their personal dedicated to them, again in line with sport. All is a left-wing one.
UCS disk space and print limit. It was suggested societies must send a representative to the next Perhaps Mr. Mayers should regret his decision to Name and address supplied
that each society should have a UCS email Standing meeting on Thursday 26th November
account and file store. The matter was referred to in the Grant Mitchell Room.

Do you have a fave beer you would like

Dan Evans and Dan Atopolski
headlining along with Simon us to stock? If so, email your request to
Evans in Monday Nights [email protected] and every
Carlsberg Ice Comedy Network in effort will be made to get it in for you.
The Helyn Rose Bar
ed981112.qxd 25/11/98 21:15 Page 4 (1,1)

4 Societies Thursday October 12 1998 n

Societies Update
ost societies think that if they don’t get plenty of our meetings. If you are more interested in the cinema side Postgraduate Association
M new members at the Freshers’ Festival then
they’ve missed the chance for the whole year.
Students are sometimes not keen to join a society halfway
then we want to hear from you too - we can train you to pro-
ject, and anyone who helps out gets to see the films for free.
And we don’t just watch films - there are our social events
through the year, even though they are absolutely dying to like the Christmas meal, and the legendary pictured OFU
jump off a cliff on a bunjee rope, or just have a damned good picnic!
game of chess! Well, hopefully this occasional feature will
help. Societies (and clubs!), here is your chance to tell all Extreme Sports Club
BF readers what your society is doing and why they should If you are fed up with nancy sports like football and rugby,
join NOW! Send your mini articles (no more than 150 then we are for you! Whether you fancy jumping out of a
words), preferably with a photo, to Bare Facts and see your
membership increase by at least a million-fold (probably).

Oscar Film Unit

Most students know that the Oscar Film Unit (OFU) is
Surrey’s campus cinema, but did you know that we also Fun isn’t just for undergrads, right? But what variety of
make films? OFU is most probably Surrey’s oldest society, “fun” do postgrads like? We’ve always assumed that you
and we have got loads of old films showing what those postgrads want something a little more, shall we say,
wacky long-haired students of the past got up to. We have “sophisticated”, like our cocktails evenings. Or maybe “pig
yourself silly”, like our barbecue. But what do you really
want? Lately the PGA committee has whittled itself down to
a hard core, and we like to think we are in touch with post-
grads in general, but we can’t be sure. So, if you’ve got a
great idea for a social event, or would like to have a go at
organising an event (it would look good on your CV, and it’s
really not that difficult!) then we want to hear from you!
plane, going down some rapids on a lilo, or merely walking And if you just want to come and enjoy our events then look
on fire, we can do it! So far we’ve been paragliding and out for our Christmas bash.
parachuting, and we would have gone white water rafting if
it wasn’t for the floods (but we will have another go some- Contact details:
time soon). Next week we will be running another parachute All societies listed above can be contacted through their
course - two evenings training and then a jump on the week- pigeonhole in the Students’ Union, or directly:
even got Rag Week 1968 on film - and that was when the end. There are still spaces, so if you are interested then get Oscar Film Unit - David Abbott (chairman): ee71da
University was still located in Battersea! OFU hasn’t made in touch. There are lots of macho sports we would like to Extreme Sports Club - Tony Ede (chairman): 01483 537536
any new films for six years, and we are keen to make some have a go at, and if you’ve got some ideas then why not email: [email protected]
new features, maybe on video, but hopefully on real film. come to our meeting on Friday lunchtime in the Grant Postgraduate Association- Secretary: [email protected]
Are you interested? If so, get in touch and come to one of Mitchell Room (in the Union)?

Unplugged
h joy, oh rapture. As the Autumn tive music societies (along with Phat

O semester draws to a close the

unPlugged team look back with
a great deal of satisfaction and look for-
Vibes, No Wave and GCR), the
unPlugged committee aim to bring to the
union the kind of music you want to lis-
ward to the last year of the millennium ten to. If you know of any musicians
with more optimism than a man who, keen to play at unPlugged then please
having had his crown jewels savagely drop a note in the unPlugged pigeon hole
removed by an irate pools collector, has or turn up to our committee meetings at
been told by leading medics that he may 7pm in the HR(lower)B on unPlugged
well father children. event nights. That is also the time to turn
up if you want to be a floor singer (ie:just
At unPlugged we offer you many styles turn up and sing a few songs). We would
of excellent live music, from students love to see you, in a purely platonic way
and professionals alike, in a wonderful of course.
candlelit, chilled out atmosphere. If you
haven’t visited the Helyn Rose bar on the Tuesday Wk 11: Later with
Tuesday evening each odd week of
semester, then you’ve missed out on Jo Holland & the Dutch
arguably the best live music this union Caps No Wave DJ
offers. Spring Semester: Talent Competition:
Keep ‘em peeled for details, but get prac-
As part of the wider coalition of alterna- tising now.
ed981112.qxd 25/11/98 21:15 Page 5 (1,1)

Thursday October 12 1998 n Music 5

SILVER SUN BOB MOULD / MERCURY REV

Face Bar @ Club Topicana, Reading Reading University, 27 / 10 / 98
28 / 10 / 98 Mercury Rev deal in one currency: beauty. being appreciated and the futility of pleasing
‘Holes’ is miraculously, amazingly, dazzlingly people with something that is intrinsically a part
Imagine a big expansive field of barren nothingness spreading across the horizon which is strangely
God damn heart rendingly gorgeously spectacu- of him. As with all apparent finales (this is
silver and contains just a patch or two of derelict, once pleasant monuments to power pop, and I would
lar. Jonathon Donahue and the rest are in their alleged to be Moulds last electric album and
imagine you are in the head of chief ‘Sun James Broad. Silver Sun are, undeniably, not what they
own little world, teasing sonic treats from their tour), there is a sense of regret and inevitability
were. Or on reflection was there ever much there aside from the shiny harmonies of ‘Lava’, ‘Golden
chosen musical machinery like they’ve been to events - the majority of the fans are nearing the
Skin’ and ‘Julia’ which tonight simper bravely in defiance of the widespread critical mauling. And as
empowered by some divine intervention. If you brow of the hill themselves and perhaps it is to be
Beach Boy tributes go this most certainly was never
think this is over the top then embrace the likes a mutual retirement. But the energy and excite-
going to be the zeitgeist, but why did it have to be so
of ‘Opus 40’ and ‘Goddess On A Hiway’ and ment of ‘Deep Karma Canyon’, and ‘Skintrade’
bad. Why?
shiver. suggest there is more. Daniel Jones
Well Ha Ha, this is what I had been expecting in light
Legends by their very nature are few and far
of the mockery made of Silver Sun in the press and
between, so to behold one is novel. But to watch
the rather lightweight album. But how wrong could I
one in a featureless hall is utterly surreal. Bob
be? Silver Sun are real pop / rock stars complete with
Mould arguably bespoke the heavy guitar twist
the postures, the inter-song banter and oh yes, some
that was grunge by some eight albums in Husker
tunes. Okay, the songs don’t morph into hook laden
Du and then endured it and outlived it in a further
melody fests, but they’re not far off. ‘Cheerleader’
seven albums in the guise of Sugar and himself.
rocks out riff-matically, yet still sparkling stylishly
Which brings us neatly to tonight.
like James’s sunglasses. In a moment of reflection,
The intensity of ‘New *1’ is little short of fear-
James intones facetiously “we normally have a
some, Mould alternating two personalities at the
younger audience than this, I feel maybe I should
close in true schizophrenic style. The newer
actually watch what I play” implying the kids just
material, infused with a feeling that the emotions
wanna jump around regardless of the sounds. And
within them still bear scars, holds court with the
indeed the few collected here do so in style, and in
more nostalgic moments. The humour of
‘Lava’ they get a nubile up on stage to boogie away.
‘Egoveride’ sparkles aside the fervent wall of
‘Sharks’ initially suggests boredom, then blooms into
melodic noise. The heavy metal cry of ‘Stand
some colossus of a pop epic, which also describes the
Guard’ and is more passionate and the only
chunk pop of ‘Mustard’. Silver Sun are fun, so don’t
offering from Black Sheets Of Rain while
believe the (contrary) hype. Daniel Jones
‘Wishing Well’ and ‘Lonely Afternoon’ echo vit-
riolic sadness.
SOMATIC Bob Mould is torn between the pleasure of still

Surrey University, 1 / 11 / 98 BIS / COOLER / VYVYAN

Starting earlier than usual for a
Sunday night, Somatic continued London Kings College, 29/10/98
their college tour to an audience of
Fanzine culture is a grey area to most people. Strange individuals thrusting poorly photocopied pam-
less than thirty. Female fronted
phlets into the hands of those who just might believe. Every so often fanzine editors come together
bands are always criticised for
for a common cause. With the UK fanzine convention barely a week earlier the South East contingent
reducing the rest of the line-up to
piled into a small hall to celebrate teen-c power and the forthcoming second album from the indie
mere backing musos. With the
underground’s flag bearers. First on though were Vyvyan, an all girl band with two singles out on
lead singer firmly in the spotlight
fanzine mogul Sid Abuse’s record label. Vyvyan are all seventeen, they play indie pop, they sing about
the five anonymous shadows
teenage dreams of stardom (‘Teenage Wannabe’), chatting up Graham from Blur (‘Shy Boy’), and
kicked into life with a sound simi-
everything else that really matters. Despite ropy sound the atmosphere was good and the girls left still
lar to Cranberries mixed with The
riding the ‘bratpop’ wave confidently.
Breeders and Scheer. Fairly soul-
Cooler don’t have much in the way of vocals. Cooler are a little ‘wacky’. Cooler have an ex member
ful indie rock with slight metal
of EMF in their ranks. Cooler sound like a slightly less cheeky Bently Rhythm Ace, controlling a sub-
overtones retained a comfortable
tle groove whilst still giving enough spontaneity to convince the crowd that not quite everything was
familiarity although occasionally
on the backing tape.
scraping close to average alterna-
Promoting current single, ‘Eurodisco’, Bis still display all the energy and enthusiasm they had when
tive radio fodder. Tight, profes-
they invaded Top Of The Pops two years ago without a record deal. Gone is the toy drum machine,
sional, ever so slightly resembling
replaced by a professional sequencer, but the DIY aesthetic remains. The new material hops from
TheAudience, heading for a mid
genre to genre, resulting in bizarre cocktails of jungle beats and early eighties disco riffs. Encoring,
twenty chart position soon!
predictably, with ‘Kandy Pop’ the kids remain united and Bis reach once again for the big league.
Andrew Thomas
Andrew Thomas

THE YOUNG OFFENDERS

Reading Face Bar 28 / 10 / 98
Young Irish rock star wannabes The Young Offenders are out on “People say whatever. If it went away we won’t be disappointed,
tour with Silver Sun to promote their third single ‘Pink And Blue’ but it may destroy us. If Robbie Williams goes on Top Of The Pops
The band are led by Ciaran MacFeely, who looks like a skinny dressed up glam he will become the leader. We are into glamorous
Marc Bolan, he explains the bands origins. “We started to make it music, and the theatrical presentation. but not revival, we looked at
exciting by looking to rock stars of other days. Just trying to be the the old bands and brought their ideas to today’s world.”
best band in the world, when nobody else wanted to be exciting A couple of hours later The Young Offenders hit the stage to be
anymore. It is my first time in a band, we are concentrating on the confronted by a virtually empty room, obviously the Silver Sun
music, the gigs and getting laid.” tour is not succeeding to well with so many bands on the road. The
The band’s upfront image recalls the early seventies glam era, has lack of crowd does not stop the band playing as though they were
that been a big influence on you? at Wembley. They are aided by a backing singer and a dancer.
“We are not really ethical about the music, we just steal what we Their songs are catchy and certainly steal from the glam era.
like, from 1940’s MGM musicals to serious seventies glam to ‘Science Fiction’ starts it off, Ciaran is the showman up front all
early, I hate to say this, grunge like Dinosaur Jr.” brash and bright, encouraging the crowd to come closer, to dance,
Their debut single ‘That’s Why We Lose Control’ was released in not to pretend they are watching Embrace. By the time the band
January this year, easily preceding the current Velvet Goldmine led reach the closing ‘That’s Why We Lose Control’ most of the peo-
glam revival, yet some sections of the press have lumped them in ple in the building are dancing. Reading welcomed the Young
with that bandwagon. Offenders with opened arms. Rob Winder

GOMEZ
Shepherds Bush Empire, 29 / 10 / 98
It doesn’t do any bands career any harm, winning loads of awards, gins in the past, seems to be not as much of an anachronism as it set that rocks you more than it rolls you. With three different
but with Gomez (who now have incidentally picked up the first appears. For a start there is ‘Whippin’ Piccadilly’, with its singers, they sure are a talented bunch. They give as good a set as
Mercury music award for best album and a Q award for best new extra dimension of keyboards which mixes with the air of chaotic anyone else this year, but due to their swift climb into the musical
band) it is that they are so young, and will they be ruined by it. sound distortion, surrounding the whole set. In the set the singles, top flight it’s not easy to get to see them.
Their album based set that consists of songs which have their ori- (which to be honest didn’t set the charts alight), slot in to a solid Nick Walsh
ed981112.qxd 25/11/98 21:15 Page 6 (1,1)

6 Music Thursday October 12 1998 n

Chance (Setenta)

SINGLES
BLACK CROWES - Kicking My heart
This is very much what we have come to expect
from The Divine Comedy, big strings and very
theatrical. A very nice sounding tune but not as
SINGLE OF THE
WEEK
good as their earlier releases. 6/10 G.D.
Around (Columbia)
Another display of true, simple, glorious rock
WASTE - Hang On (Jealous)
that has made this band one of the best. A stun-
Little-known Waste bring us a catchy indie-pop
ner. 8/10 G.C.
ditty. Sadly, however, originality has let Waste PAUL WELLER - Brand New Start (Island)
down in this instance - this could easily be one This is a mellow song that tries to be something
SUNHOUSE − Loud and Lippy EP
from Parklife/Great Escape era Blur. The B-side but isn’t. There is nothing special or wonderful
(Independiente)
is pretty good though. 6/10 J.R.H. about it, but it is a nice, ‘forward looking’, back-
A good solid bit of songwriting from the old
school of authentic guitar songs. Four good ground song. It’s featured in the forthcoming
SNOW PATROL – ‘Absolute Gravity’ collection ‘Modern Classics’ which also includes
tracks on this non-chart worthy CD. Tracks two
(Jeepster Recordings) Wild Wood and You Do Something To Me,
sounds a bit Nick Drake, the others are all whisky
Velocity Girl is a tad repetitive and all the other which are amongst his best ever (I think so any-
coloured and husky voiced about women who
songs are done in a similar way. The actual way). Sadly a 3/10 M.D.
‘done me over’. Good though. 7/10 N.W.
sound is pretty good but needs a little bit more
action. According to the cover ‘DarthVader and
MUCHO MACHO - The Airport Freeze
his washing mix are involved in ‘Velocity Girl’ a
(Wiiija) THE AFGHAN WHIGS -Somethin’
strange love song that is about smiling at people
FUZZ TOWNSEND - Get Yourself (Echo) Hot (Columbia)
in the street. Very weird but quite funky. 5/10 This weeks reviews brought to you by:
The success of Fatboy Slim has opened the flood- It’s not every day you hear a new single
G.T. Andrew Thomas, Andrew Smith, Mario Dias,
gates for the Big Beat Revolution. Mucho Macho
Gemma Decent, Matthew Anderson, Rob that sounds as fresh as this little gem.
use a wall of catchy breakbeats, whereas Bentley
Rhythm Ace drummer Fuzz Townsend uses a
FAITH EVANS-Love Like This (Arista) Winder, James Hemingway, Gabriel Chamero, Great guitars and dreamy vocals con-
Nothing special here, another would-be R ‘n’ B Nick Walsh, and Daniel Jones tribute to a splendid overall punk-rock
funked up bassline. Both should pack the dance-
diva. admittedly slightly above average, but not vibe. The Afghan Whigs are one of
floor at the Boutique. 7/10 R.W.
enough to distinguish her from the competition. music’s great undiscovered secrets,
5/10 M.A.
THE DIVINE COMEDY - The Certainty Of ‘Somethin’ Hot’ indeed. 9/10 A.S.

ALBUMS
CARTER USM - Sessions (Cooking Vinyl)
ALBUM OF THE WEEK
AFGHAN WHIGS - 1965 (Columbia)
Say hello, and make it a hearty one (because, surely you’ll fall in love), to one of the finer, nay finest
FAT HARRY WHITE AND THE LOVE
LIMITED ORCHESTRA - Hmmmm Baby:
The Seduction Selection (Anxious)
moments of this year. Initial sensations propound less conviction than Black Love offered but this is Manchester’s Sultan of Sex Fat Harry White
Carter, a band associated with the early nineties, no less intense and more claustrophic - an utter cauldron of emotion with a bevy of dreamy soul tex- delivers a selection of sultry sensual soul. Or, for-
baggy shorts, backwards baseball caps, and stu- tures enforced through the grooved up sound. Imagine a big tree, old but beautifully contorted, the mer Fall-man and Radio 1 DJ’s sidekick Mark
dents (complete with halls-friendly drum picture of serenity, perhaps prone to creaking as the gales get up. Imagine it’s an autumn dawn there’s Riley delivers a selection of innuendo filled spo-
machine). Carter have been blamed for the ‘indie an eclectic bed of leaves showered on the floor and even if, through some freak of nature this old oak ken work passages set to cheesy Casio keyboard
disco’ and for inventing Bis, this compilation of re-rooted to the middle of your worst nightmare, it protects and engulfs you in its beauty. If you could soul sounds. Humorous enough the first time, but
radio sessions goes some way to explaining why. imagine that you have experienced 1965 in its little known tree format. the joke soon wears thin. 3/10 R.W.
‘Sheriff Fatman’ is here, with it’s relentless beat- Organic dark soul is the buzz term here in a string of shagging and obsessions. In ‘Neglekted’, the
box rhythm and Casio strings, turning into a female object is apprised by Greg “You can f**k my body baby, but please don’t f**k my mind”, the BALLROOM - Day After Day (Mother)
Status Quo jam at the end! Other highlights emotional tornado of ‘City Soleil’ is amazing and ‘John the Baptist’ is a jazzy bastard of a song. Ballroom are simply another one of those boring
include the bleak council house vision of Damn this is good. 9/10 D.J. ‘new wave of new grave’ bands. They wear the
‘Commercial Flippin’ Suicide’ and the acoustic familiar black attire, they try to delineate to us
The One’, which may now get the airplay it THE KING - Gravelands (EMI)
strum of ‘Nowhere Fast’. Unfortunately some of their misery, but they lack the insight of say,
should have had a couple of years ago. Then It feels like Karaoke night. Jim Brown, also
the tracks inbetween feel like fillers and a few Radiohead, or the poppy tunes of Suede. They
there’s the forthcoming single, ‘No Regrets’, a known as “The King, is an Elvis impersonator,
more hits would have been nice. 7/10 A.T.
New Order-like shuffle featuring the contrasting and not a bad one too. “Gravelands” is filled to sound like Strangelove at their worst, 3rd. divi-
vocal talents of messrs Tennant and Hannon, and the brim with covers of old classics such as Marc sion indie. There is maybe one decent tune on the
VARIOUS-Bee Gees Tribute Album (Polydor)
the hard-edged Meatloaf-meets-Zep epic ‘Karma Bolan’s “20th Century Boy”, Sweet’s album ‘Don’t Stop’. The rest was just painful lis-
Well, where to start? Well, this is officially a
Killer’, which outstrips its older brother, the Who “Blockbuster” and Nirvana’s “Come As You tening. It is not as if we need more bands like
charity album in aid of the homeless in the north
rip-off ‘Let Me Entertain You’, by a mile. Are”?!? There are high moments, the music is this, who aspire to be in the gutter looking at the
west. Apparently the Bee Gees grew up there so
Unfortunately, these, though slighty cloned, generally spot on and the covers of “Voodoo stars, but are more in the gutter because they are
this idea was hit upon. The backbone of this
highlights are off-set by rubbish like ‘Man Chile” and “No Woman No Cry” have to be shit. The lyrics are poor, portrayal of Ballrooms
album is formed by tracks that have already been
Machine’, the Baddiel/Skinner ode ‘Phoenix heard to be believed. Unfortunately, despite it’s apparent wasted lifestyle, a life no-one else
released as singles, mostly successfully,
From The Flames’, and the awful last single mad-cap charm, there always seems to be a sense would even be interested in living. One for the
(Boyzone, Louise, and most recently 911).
‘Millennium’. Don’t ‘expect’ too much. 6/10 of cheesiness throughout. This is likely to be a Camden no hopers perhaps. 3/10 N.W.
Convenient. The rest are rehashed by other ven-
J.R.H. very enjoyable live experience, but one can not
erables including Space, and Robbie Williams
help wondering whether it’s worth forking out
teaming up with the Orb. Both are instntly for-
PRAS - Ghetto Supastar (Ruffhouse) £14 for the album. A bit of a laugh then, but like
gettable, and I’m sure they will be forgetting
I’m sorry, but I just don’t understand the point of Karaoke, the novelty begins to wear off once you
them. Essentially this is an album for Bee Gees
this album. At least four tracks are messages on sober up. 4/10 A.S.
fanatics who like listening to other people man-
Pras’ answering machine telling him how good
gle their songs.7/10 M.A.
they expect his album to be. The rest is a mix of RECOMMENDED
rap and gospel sounds, such as ‘Hallelujah’ and IDLEWILD - Hope Is
V/A - The End (XL)
‘Amazing Grace’. The tracks ‘Ghetto Supastar Important (Food)
This compilation featuring an amazing display of
(That Is What You Are)’ and ‘Blue Angels’ are The debut long player
different musical tastes, from drum & bass, hip
actually quite good, but you may as weel just go from the music press next
hop and breakbeat to house, garage and techno
out and buy the singles. 4/10 G.D. big things. Every drop of
will leave no-one dissatisfied... Les Rhythm
teen energy is squeezed
Digitales, Lo Fidelity Allstars, Howie B, Ganja
AUDIOWEB - FIREWORKS CITY (Mother) into the tweleve songs,
Kru and a few other major names make this one Hello.... hello.... Why must Manchester upturn resulting in the initial
of the best compilations in the market. 8/10 G.C the most boring, lumpen new music when it has thrash of ‘You’ve Lost
been such a rich breeding ground before? And Your Way’ to the slower
ROBBIE WILLIAMS - I’ve Been Expecting why, when Audioweb could have been an grinds of ‘A Film In The
You (Chrysalis) entralling project, are they a rehashed funk Future’. So they’re anoth-
Impressively hot on the heels of the hugely over- Echobelly in ‘Policeman Skank’ and ‘Sometimes er young all male indie
rated ‘Life Thru’ A Lens’ (excepting the excel- For A Reason’, yet a pitiful Massive Attack come guitar band with more in
lent ‘Angels’), comes the ex-Take That man’s Soul 2 Soul fusion in ‘Soul On Fire’ and purvey- common with Symposium
sophomore solo recording. The formula is basi- ors of Shabba Rank posturings on ‘Out Of than they’d probably like
cally the same - Oasis guitars, ott production, Many’? Perhaps its what Mother wanted but it to admit. Still, what they
dodgy lyrics (“I hope you choke on your bacardi makes for tiresome listening. Take ‘Try’ - a dev- lack in originality they
and coke”!) and whining vocals. Surprisingly, astatingly good chorus thrown away within irri- make up for with sheer
however, there are two or three stand-out tracks, tating dub soul. Why? energy and attitude.
the best being the carbon-copy of Karl ‘World 4/10 D.J. Discovered by Steve Lamacq, on tour with Ash, definately one to watch in 1999. 8/10 A.T.
Party’ Wallinger’s stunningly beautiful ‘She’s
BERNARD BUTLER themselves in Goth, Electro or other faux genres in favour of stated how unafraid he is to preview unreleased songs and the new
seeming modern but often that elusive ingredient ‘substance’ ones played tonight are in many ways better than the old stuff, you
Shepherds Bush Empire 29/10/98 seems to pass them by. Bernard Butler is a natural entertainer in the just don’t know them yet. To many fair-weather fans this may
Coming onstage to a trio of The Smiths, Bob Dylan and New same way Robbie Williams, just give him a guitar and he will bang seem old hat, but there are not many virtuoso guitarists, who can
Order, Bernard (big hair) Butler really does make it hard for oth- out a song and keep the crowd captivated. Songs such as ‘Stay’ are sing, write enduring songs as well as providing a good night out.
ers to guess his influences. But are there anything wrong with his pure beauties and on ‘Autograph’ he gesticulates electrical elation
influences? It could be far worse! Other bands have immersed to the audience in a way few others acts can. Bernard has often Nick Walsh
ed981112.qxd 25/11/98 21:15 Page 7 (1,1)

Thursday October 12 1998 n Entertainments Guide 7

Cineline
0870 505 0007
OFU
Fri 13th Nov to Thurs 19th Nov
Blade
Saturday Friday Thursday Wednesday Tuesday Monday Sunday Saturday Friday

fri-sat 12.45 15.45 18.30 21.20

13th

sun - thurs 12.15 14.55 17.35 20.20

Hope Floats
fri-sat 13.30 16.15 19.00 21.40
sun - thurs 12.20 15.00 17.40 20.20
ANTZ
fri-sat 11.00 (sat only) 13.15 15.30 17.45 19.55 22.00
sun - thurs 12.20 14.30 16.40 18.50 21.00
The Exorcist
14th

fri-sat 13.00 16.00 18.45 21.30

sun-thurs12.15 15.00 17.45 20.30
Still Crazy
fri-sat 20.00 22.10
sun -thurs 19.00 21.10 US Marshals
There’s Something about Mary
fri-sat 16.10 18.55 21.40 15th Nov 5 & 8pm & 16th Nov 8pm
sun 18.00 20.40 Lecture Theatre G
mon- thurs 15.20 18.00 20.40 The cop who won’t stop is back but this time he is chasing
15th

Haloween H20 down a lot more than a fugitive. U.S Marshal Sam Gerard (Mr
fri-sat 22.20 Lee Jones) is accompanying a planeload of convicts to New
Elizabeth York when the plane crashes. One prisoner Mark Sheridan
fri-sat 13.40 16.3 19.30 (Mr W. Snipes) helps Gerard to rescue some of the trapped
sun-thurs 12.10 14.55 17.30 20.15 prisoners but then escapes himself. FBI agent John Royce
The Truman Show (Robert Downey Jr) is assigned to help Gerard recapture
fri-sat 14.10 16.40 19.10 21.50 Sheridan and it becomes clear then Sheridan is more than
sun 15.30 18.15 20.50 your average murderer.
mon-thurs 13.00 15.30 18.15 20.50
16th

Small Soldiers What can I say except It’s A Wonderful Life. Yes Indeedy
fri-sat 12.30 15.00 17.30 next wednesday (18th Nov) you will be able to view this mas-
sun-thurs 13.30 16.15 terpiece in LT G at 8pm James Stewart plays George
Snake eyes Bailey, who, finding himself down on his luck, is prevented
fri-sat12.15 14.40 17.05 19.30 22.00 from committing suicide by his guardian angel, who shows
sun-thurs 13.15 16.00 18.30 21.00 him all the top stuff he has done in his life and who benefited
Mulan from it. Stewart is brilliant and it is one of the ultimate feel-
fri-sat 12.05 14.10 good films that is not to be missed. Fantastically reassuring,
sun 12.30 14.50 you are guaranteed to glow with happiness when you leave
17th

mon-thurs 12.30 the theatre.

Ever After: A Cinderella Story
sat 11.40 Be happy and buy you tickets for both films from the union
sun 12.45 receptionist or reserve them via the OFU box in the union
Jackie Brown post room. Byeeeeee.
Wed 14.00 17.00 20.10

Straight over

GIG GUIDE ice or with

18th

your
It is always advisable to confirm with the favourite
venue before travelling. mixer
Childrens Party November
Thurs 12th
Delakota @ Portsmouth Wedgewood
Rooms
19th

Fri 13th
Gulf, Vibracore, Waif, Tonal Tonic
@ Reading Alleycat
Sat 14th
Dream City Film Club, Kilter @
Cranleigh Arts Centre
Sun 15th
Caffeine @ London Camden Barfly
20th

Mon 16th
Astrid, Roddy Frame @ Portsmouth
Wedgewood rooms
Tues 17th
Entombed @ London Highbury
Garage
Wed 18th
21st

Cable @ Farnham Maltings

Thurs 19th Watch this space for exclusive news of
Seafood, Billy Mahonie, Tiny Too
@ Reading Alleycat
the christmas FNO. Next week
Cay @ London Bull&Gate ONLY in Barefacts
ed981112.qxd 25/11/98 21:15 Page 8 (1,1)

8 Features Thursday October 12 1998 n

Live Music - choose it or lose it? WWW? by Pravin Jeyaraj

ould Zoe Ball be the new Cilla Black? The Radio 1 pre-

I
t’s quite ironic that here at Surrey,
of all places, we are facing the grim
reality that live music is becoming
less and less popular amongst the stu-
you’re educated in dance culture that
you’ll know who the DJ is and be quite
frank it could be argued that a large
proportion of the University wouldn’t
You can’t get a live act in your bed-
room (musical I mean…) and nine
times out of ten, live performances of
released singles you may own are often
C senter set up a makeover for two members of the Breakfast
Show production team, who just happen to be single. Now,
she wants to try to get them dates. Zoe B thought Zoe Alpass (aka
Zoe A) and Piers Bradford (aka Piers) looked “hot” after BBC1’s
dents. Gone are the days that a live act give a shit who it was as long as the very different. Live acts also give you Style Challenge swapped their normal street look for drop dead
would double or even triple the num- price was low and the music was good. something to watch, something to glamour.
bers interested in going to a venue …. Also, is the Main Union the best venue focus on and enjoy and the best thing
Instead it seems that live music at for relatively specialistic music? It’s about most of the acts that come here is If you have a mate (or even better, two mates) who are unattached,
Surrey is doing little more than filling great for Friday Night Out as everyone that they are free! then take a look at the Blind Date site. This has nothing to do with
up the What’s On column in Barefacts knows that there will be a decent selec- the television show of the same name. All you have to do is type
in two email addresses and the date, time and place of the meeting.
and eating up the free Ents budget for tion of music and a good sociable With Tuesday Night ‘Unplugged’ still
An email is then sent to the potential lovebirds. Falling in love
the year. At least that’s what some peo- atmosphere. Saturday’s and Sunday’s being as popular as ever it proves that could not be simpler! Staying in love...now that is whole different
ple seem to believe. are different – predominantly you lis- student led acts from smaller acoustic ball game.
ten to the acts and are expected to sets up to full band evenings such as
The truth of the matter is different. dance - not socialise. ‘Housewife’ and the forth coming Apologies for the absence of this column last week. My attempt to
Live music at this University is not as So is it worth keeping live music and ‘Later with Jo Holland & The Dutch be funny manifested itself in unintentional libel.. Anyway, I have
poor as people make out. In fact taking acts going at Surrey? Most definitely. Caps’ makes for good variety of enter- decided that humour is best left to the experts: the designers of the
into consideration the money available It would seem we are in a rut where tainment. ‘Phat Vibes’ and ‘No Wave’ following sites for example. Fancy Lad is a web site that origi-
for free Ents and the nature of the acts decide against coming to our deal in the same areas and are also nates from Vancouver. Most of the humour is aimed at adult gay
men, but the site is intended to be a fun alternative from all those
venue as predominantly ‘club mem- Union as the promoters gauge that the doing extremely well for themselves
that just show naked guys or lifestyle reference pages. The site is
bers only’, we do rather well. Also, reaction to one of their acts was poor this year. Maybe with a bit more sup- probably the most organised I have ever seen There are four
when referring to ‘live’ music, I find it and they don’t want to risk sending any port this is the way forward to creating menus. In particular, Comedy consists of the type of jokes,
hard not to incorporate the likes of the of their other acts here for fear of a dis- something to be proud off ……the humourous anecdotes and lists that are emailed all over the world.
‘No Wave’ & ‘Phat Vibes’ D.J’s who appointing reception again. The legal- potential is amazing. In the future we One of the funniest topics is Worst things to hear while you’re hav-
are finally getting the recognition they ities of getting more well know acts could forge links with other ing sex.
deserve for their nights in the Helyn here is also a balanced problem in Universities in the area…..exchange
Rose Bar. As far as I can see, mixing itself as advertising the promoters has DJ’s for nights……there are so many Bare Facts’ very own News Editor has also made a contribution to
the fundamentals of music on a pair of some type of far fetched technicality possibilities to boost live acts…we just web-based world of jokes. James Buller’s homepage is very
colourful (and accessible to the visually impaired). One really inter-
decks is no different to learning to play attached meaning the best we get here need a kick start.
esting link is My Funny Things. This is a collection of all the jokes
an instrument. The fact that nights is Space (who I personally felt were that have been written by Buller, emailed to him or found some-
such as these don’t rely on chart orien- absolutely dire). My opinion is that for a University where on the web. If you want to know why God never got a PHD,
tated ‘popular’ music means that they which has a music and dance influence how to keep yourself entertained in a lift (don’t be dirty) and the
should be classed as proper acts, not as ‘Unplugged’ is a great example of the imbedded within it, we don’t do value of To 26,123 decimal places then this the site for you.
your run-of-the-mill Friday night way that live music should be enough to support the live music
Jukebox D.J’s. approached at Surrey. Admittedly the events and stage acts that come here. A group of Stafford University students have created a Spice
Helyn Rose Bar is a little small and More student bands, more student Goths web site, hence fuelling the rumours that students have a lot
So why is it that Sunday Night Live badly designed to hold proper concerts D.J’s ……more alternative of time on their hands. However, the site has remained more-or-
less static due to the group dispersing after graduation this year.
and Toniq aren’t doing as well as they such as Sunday Night Live, but to be nights…..more ents question-
should? There could be several rea- honest, the number of people that sur- naires……more acts that don’t make The designers are keen to stress that this is not a fan page, but an
sons. Are the acts supplied in the round the Main Stage on a Sunday us feel cheated by a backing tape and a attempt to show the world how bad the Spice brats really are. Like,
Union the type that are really wanted? Night Live could be accommodated couple of dancers……more atmos- duh! Indeed, the Spice Girls’ axe-wielding, maniacal tendencies
A recent survey seemed to suggest downstairs and would at least give phere……more interest! It makes seem strange against a white background. There is a section dedi-
more top name D.J’s would be popular. these events some type of atmosphere. sense to support the live events we’ve cated to anti-Spice Girl jokes, but these are just rehashes of the old
This maybe the case, but would you Recent Sunday successes have been have otherwise our rapidly worsening Essex girl jokes. Mel B, Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise are the stars of
rather watch a DJ or a live band? A Electrasy, Moloko and Beverley reputation for live acts will only allow an interview, parodying ‘Interview with a Vampire’. There is even
combination has in the past been suc- Knight - each of which had a sense of us to book the likes of ‘Rolf Harris’ the chance to vote for the ugliest Spice Girl and one you would
most like to see killed FIRST. Currently, Mel C and Emma respec-
cessful, yet combining a dance DJ with occasion to them. The Bootleg Beatles and ‘Rod, Jane and Freddy’ for the
tively are in the lead. The site is easy to read and traverse, and a
any type of live act is difficult at the and the Dust Junkies last year were Grad Ball. Hmmmm now there’s an good way to pass the time in between lectures.
best of times as a large proportion of other really great nights and it appears idea………
people will only go to see the act and a sense of occasion is what is needed at Andy Blair This week’s websites
then bugger off home . Its only if Surrey. Live acts are only occasional. (GCR & Housewife) mu62ab Blind Date (Not the TV Show) http://www.blinddate.org/
Fancy Lad http://models.badpuppy.com/fancylad/fancylad.htm
Spice Goths
Daily Mail Ski and Snowboard Show 1998 http://www.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/Studio/1721/index.html
Ewen Ferguson James Buller’sHomepage
http://www.mcs.surrey.ac.uk/Personal/Student/ma71jb
h e useful tips on carving and boarding to those of us who weren’t too This week’s keywords“gay humour”, “anti-spice girls”, “spice

T Ski
and
Snowboard
jealous to watch. Also on the slope was a spectacular ‘Big Air’ per-
formance of the most impressive aerial skiing and snowboarding
that we’d ever seen. The show was created to mark this year’s 25th
goths”, “blind date”

Voting in Elections
show is the anniversary of the show and featured world class extreme skiers,
f you have moved to Guildford this autumn you should ensure
largest con-
sumer exhi-
aerialists, trampoline skiers, in-line skaters, and snowboarders on
an aerial ramp. A massive crowd gathered in awe all around the
I that you are registered to vote in local and national elections.
bition in slope to watch the performance, leaving the rest of the exhibition
Students resident in University accommodation on campus, at
the world empty. Andy James, familiar as a FNO and Outrage DJ, smoothly
Hazel Farm and at Ted Adams House on 10th October 1998 will
for the ski compered the show.
be included in the return made by the Accommodation Officer to
and snow-
Guildford Borough Council. The Draft Register of Electors is
b o a r d This year the Fashion Show was on a special catwalk, with
available at the Council offices and local post offices for checking
industry and takes place every year at Olympia. We set off with improved sound and lighting. Our front row seats gave a superb
at the beginning of December - check that you are included. If you
excitement- not only were we going to the show, but we had press view of the designs to be seen
were not resident in Guildford on 10th October you are not eligi-
passes to make us look important and hopefully get lots of freebies. in on the slopes and apres-ski.
ble to vote in Guildford and you should ensure that you are regis-
About ten designer collections
tered for the address at which you were resident on that date.
This year’s show was particularly impressive, with over 150 oper- were presented, including the
Copies of lists sent by Accommodation to the Council will be
ators, representatives and retailers all trying to persuade you how latest from Escapiste, Fat Face
available for checking in Court Receptions at the end of October.
much better they are than their competitors, usually by plying you and Schofel. If only we weren’t
with free drink. The stands displayed a massive selection of skis, poor students!
If you live offsite, forms for electoral registration are sent to every
boards, boots, clothes and accessories, including top bargains- pro-
address in September and reminders are sent out in October. You
vided you don’t mind wearing last year’s colours! Themed bars For those of you interested in
are required by law to complete the forms with all necessary infor-
and restaurants, ski simulators, and ‘real’ snow all added to the skiing and snowboarding, there
mation. Students are entitled to vote at home as well as in
great atmosphere inside Olympia. are still some places left on the
Guildford and you are strongly recommended to make sure you
Ski Club trip to Val d’Isere
are registered in both places. Note however that during a General
The highlight of the show was a dry ski slope, used for the World during the Christmas vacation.
Election you can only vote in one place, not both!The
Indoor Synchro Championships featuring the seven best national For more information contact
Accommodation Office and Students’ Union will help but it is
teams from around the world, who gave an exhilarating precision Ewen on ext. 4354.
your responsibility to check that you are included on the Register
skiing demonstration. Top instructors from Italy and France gave
of Electors.
ed981112.qxd 25/11/98 21:15 Page 9 (1,1)

Thursday October 12 1998 n Notices & Personals 9

nsingle parent loooking for his life. nlk - a sweet, caring, sensitive so get it cut mohican syle!!!!
Just a couple of Personals affectionate female for friend- ncoxy we thought you would- teddy bear - with fangs. n wham, bam, thankyou lang!
ship and possible romance n’t share your bed with anyone, nwho farted in lecture theatre g nhello monkey, from the
n2thepeople: drew_1000@hot- goat blowers n40 single and solvent looking two in a week what’s going on sunday during the ofu shandy sipping southerners!
mail.com nwhere’s the police contact for love and romance on??? film???? nclare, i know it is hard being a
nhey jude...are you single? tally (2 ticks for yesterday nchocolate lime was already ncelebrity deathmatch - gay ndear cavey, i’ve seen you woman but its not any easier
nso katie - do you swallow or please) really yummy nah vs. the small filipino boy. around,i find you very attrac- being a bloke.
do you spit it out? i’m gagging nplymouth, home of ‘the l’il l’ nhs.64 jodie no.1 oops he’s already been eaten! tive, will you go to bed with n the joelites ask: where are
to know!!! ni’ll have a small doner, oh nget your butt down and do nchris @ twyford e; i have me!!! love bird you, funnyman?
n Thanks to every one in house you’ve something on your ear, some work girl!!!! your boxers luv becky xxx n if the crossword writer is so nto the blondbombshells- or
65 for the fantastic cooking and looks like chick kebab n dear sophie, how’s your nquick & easy dinners by tim- clever why is the crossword should that be the ginga
light relief that made this issue n”sweetheart and pouch look- boyfriend?. othy. (£5.99 hardback from all always so f***ing shit?! stingers-congrats for blitzing
possible. out! wellhung is coming for n pissed in london, lets go to good bookstores) n dear sophie, how’s your the bristol bullets!
nBoyD - bought any US you both.” alton!!! (towers) nthe angel does not like to be boyfriend? nfor a smooth ride ware large
Cigars recently? nto rocky horror chick, who njames u petit pederat cut up (she goes large nwill the real billy mentaller pants!!
nDave H for Li** the randy falls down holes after 3 pints at nrupert, either the sheep goes nthe dinner lady says blar blar please step forward. ndoes anyone know why the 2
little barmaid. ram.next time keep eyes off or he’s lamb chops fom pammy blar nliz, you’re a very special per- dodgy girls in the resturant
n dear joel - remember us? bumwiggle! k,j,&e nzammo’s spelling lessons nslim fit with many interests son and i love you! have so much fun?
love p,m,j nhouse 66 kicks arse! number 2; reluctance! as in wltm honest female nhere’s to friendship!!! nthe angel will drunk no more
n when it falls off give us a call nclaire-did ya pull? something i display when you nany chelsea fans out there njoel, come out, come out (or will she?)
we’ve got spares. nhall restaurant gals want more try and snog me every time you want to go to matches with me? wherever you are. nwe all love sapila, therefore
nmark whiteley is now chris- customers please! are larrapped! cliffy xxx contact ma81km ncrossword writer, why are we all love the rotten people of
tened bimbo nal,matt and claire-hello!pie ni’m covered in nto the guy who asked me the you so shit? stag hill 44
nwatch out girls justin hamil- and mash! beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssss time - don’t you think it’s time nsophie, come out, come out nrachel ponders, agonisingly,
ton is about! n ollie, is hannah smiling yet? ssssssss we met up? wherever you are. the trinian treats she can bestow
nhave you ever got it stuck in a row, row, row your boat... nbeware of the dbc, we’re out nyou’re still the one! this kiss, nso lads, what’s 5 flashes upon the man behind the
zipper before? n”another all-nighter, by to get ya this kiss - it’s criminal... then?! mask to escape the cold and icy
nkelly watch the stars.............. j,m,f,l,r and l. you missed the nmy god, so there’s someone npoooie, who dropped one at np, what a lot of fuss over one pool. no, really!
nthere is only one dodgy bird party, suck-ups!” else from norwich here! last weekends ofu film? little question ! nin accordance with tradition
club. beware of cheap imita- n”’dancing queen’ ruth in 59. n we all know it’s going on npetie the pervert likes chicks nwinston met billy and got a and gentlemanly conduct, the
tions. miaowwww! how’s mr. benn?” bruce, for once stay over in with d**ks nose job universty of surrey football
n ollie, is hannah smiling yet? nand, here is the latesat foot- park barn asit’s such a long nuc59 rm17-all ladies after nsoz - mind where you step on club, cordially invites the wom-
row, row, row your boat... ball result from europe:’real way to walk home in an 9:30pm i pay for sex. your driveway ens football club to both the
ncould you please keep your madrid 1 - surreal madrid evening. npetie i can’t stop thinking nDH - Do some bloody work annual christmas club dinner
14” kebab knife inside the van. fish’ n mr rowling, fancy a cigarette, about you. you horny stallion. nthe wheat krunchies are back (sat 5th dec) and the england vs
nclaire and jayne in house 47. n59uc: any one up for rave??? chap? nice!! love and more-laura in action, you could choke a czech republic curry night
stop keeping me up all night nto mars and back or penelope ni’m very sorry - i don’t know nuc59 do you have any dozen donkeys on that (weds 18th nov). who’s a lucky
with the ‘squeaky door’ pitstops perilious pink what else to say. cake!!!!!!!!!!!! nsat: rain sun: sunshine god bunch of teasers then?
nhuddersfield - full of northern vodka.....? nmr soggy-boggy searches for n”west 4 & friends, tks for my plays women’s rugby!!
little miss bouncy to sparkle up great “33rd” b’day.” ndan only girls suck their hair -

Crossword No 84 Notices Get a Healthy Planet

Wanted: 3 Management students to share back to back
lease in January 2000 Contact Anna 4312 or li82af
Xtreme sports club Parachuting Course week 11 Tuesday
Tree people. Eco Warriors. Environmentalists.
and Thursday Evening Jump for the Sunday Contact Tony People who don’t shave their legs, shop at Oxfam
537536 Grant Mitchell roon Friday Lunch time rather than TopShop and last washed their hair when
Manchester City were a good football team.
Continents collide in The LakesideThis Tuesday
(17th), the Lakeside Restaurant will be presenting a tanta- People who are self righteous, without a sense of
lising combination of Eastern cuisine and Western culinary humour, and piously given endless lectures about
delights. Book now whilst you still can on ext. 9655 how that coke can you so shamelessly neglected to
Alternatively, pop in on the day. It's good food at great recycle in 1987 has brought the world to the brink of
value. environmental disaster.
Change Ringers AGM People who try to wake a wider view of their lives.
Thursday 12th november at 18.30 in TB23 People who try to be concerned about things other
MACS Society AGM - Friday 13 Nov. LTH 12.00 than the price of Value beans at Tescos and what’s
University of Surrey Lesbian,Gay and Bisexual Society
going to happen to Cindy Beale’s baby in ‘Enders.
meetings every Tuesday 8pm, TB20b, or e-mail lgbsoc@sur-
rey.ac.uk for further information
People who are trying to take action now, to make
Pool Society start up meeting 18.00 by the pool tables on difference for the future.
Thursday 19th November
Oscar Film Unit EGM - To elect a new secretary. Tuesday People who are concerned about the dramatic weath-
1st December - 18.00 LTH er patterns over the last few months; the droughts in
Across Down Thai Society AGM - Friday 27th November 18.00 LTA Texas this summer, the devastating hurricanes and
1. Old Fashioned (10) 1. Change (5)
Are there any czech speakers (mt or fluent) tornadoes, the floods.
7. Train of attendants (7) 2. A shade (4)
8. Preen (5) 3. Squeamish (6) who can help with a language project?
10. Attire (4) 4. Assigns to a post (8) please contact: jo @ lim4jb or ext. 4182 People who are worried about that old clique, ‘the
11. Rough Calculation (8) 5. Moslem chiefdom (7) Scout and guide club will be holding their agm on future for our children’. People who will be at the
13. Headgear (3-3) 6. Brilliance (10) tuesday 24th november in teaching block 23 at 8pm
15. A capital city (6) 9. A joking remark (10)
Green Soc. meeting on Thursday at 6pm in TB 21
17. Attractive (8) 12. Death of body tissue (8) for the talk by the brilliant Stuart Parkinson about
Would any jewish students interested in forming a j-soc on
18. To twirl (4) 14. Spectacular procession
campus please contact maria on ext. 4232. thanks!
global warming, to see what we can all try and do
21. Serpent (5) (7) about it now.
22. Voter (7) 16. Originate (6)
wanted for dissertation! Get a life . Get a healthy planet.
23. American trams (10) 19. Crowns of heads (5)
20. Second Greek letter (4) british born, pakistani females. if you are willing to be inter- Claire Haggett
viewed for half an hour for my sociology dissertation,
please email me on [email protected]. I would really
appreciate it. All replies completely confidential.
Last Weeks Solution
Across: 1. perhaps 5. hunch 8. querulous 9. pig 10.
expertly 12. grow 14. masque 15. chatty 17. apex 18. sup- CALLING ALL GREENIES By; Caroline Hamer (Environmental Officer)
posed 21. dig 22. Oddfellow 24. rural 25. rest-day
Down: 1. pique 2. rye 3. Aquarius 4. scowls 5. husk 6.
In case you didn’t know-we now have a new environmen- ing to set up a set of people who I can help develop into a
nephritis 7. highway 11. passenger 13. whippets 14. mean- tal officer (ME!). I am Caroline Hamer and am a first year cohesive environmental group. If you are interested, or
der 16. rudder 19. dowry 20. howl 23. lid dance and culture student. For anyone who feels like get- would like more details please leave your contact details in
Compiled by ting involved in any aspect of the environment from rais- the environmental officers pigeon hole in the Union.
Jeff Blackham ing awareness to the cleaning up of woodlands. I am look- Thank you
ed981112.qxd 25/11/98 21:15 Page 10 (1,1)

10 Health & Advice Thursday October 12 1998 n

Dr Russ Safety Advice from Assault Victim

few weeks ago I wrote a letter to Barefacts about the aforementioned footpath however.

A
Dear Russ
Got any good advice about performing well at inter- state of the footpaths to and from the university. I So while Guildford may not feel completely safe, perhaps
views? complained that they were poorly lit and had been we should count our blessings. Going by the various crime
the scene of attacks against students. Thankfully I have not reports in the Colchester local press and this particular inci-
Dear Peter been the victim of assault…..in Guildford that is: dent it would appear that Essex University students may
The interview is your opportunity to convince an employer lead much more dangerous lives. I hope this is not so.
that you’re the right person for the job. That means achiev- Last weekend I visited my friend Hannah, in Colchester, , In any case the fact remains that Guildford has been the
ing two things:- you must prove you have the right qualities for the first time. On Saturday night we and her brother scene of so called "student bashing" and my experience
and you must convince them that you’d love to do the job Robert decided to go to the cinema. As we stood at the bus shows what could happen to YOU. Sadly it is impossible to
you’ve applied for. stop a drunken youth joined us. We humoured him for a few leave campus, at night without braving the danger-zones.
minutes, hoping the bus would arrive. Yorkie's Bridge, Cathedral Car Park, The Chase, Tesco's
My first tip is this - make sure that you plan for the inter- When he got hostile however we started to move off. He subway or Southway footpath. All of the above are poorly
view well in advance. Examine the job description closely. took exception to this and grabbed me by the throat. Within lit (if at all) and are often deserted. President Harriet Sims
This will list the attributes which the job requires. Think seconds he was swinging his lager can holding fist at my has pledged to act on these issues, I hope some progress will
about all you have done which you could use as evidence to face. After a brief scuffle Robert and I managed to over- be made.
show that you meet those requirements. Employers are par- power the intoxicated brute and force him into a corner.
ticularly keen to find out whether you have appropriate We retreated across the road and began to walk home. It was I'd like to advise EVERYONE to be careful at ALL times. I
skills such as leading, researching and organising and often then that I noticed the blood coming from the beer can rim didn't take my attack alarm with me that night and look what
ask you to provide examples of when and how you have shaped gash on my cheek. Four hours of Casualty waiting happened. Cycle rather than walk, avoid walking alone,
demonstrated these in the past. You should also spend some time later, I had Sterastitch plastered on my face and a spit- invest in an alarm: £1 from either Security or Nightline. NB:
time researching the employer in greater depth. It’s a good ting headache. Security will not sell them to blokes - (even though we're
time to browse through their annual report for instance. statistically more likely to be attacked!) Nightline can also
Thankfully the rest of the weekend passed without incident give you more advice on how to stay safe when out and
Your planning should include taking another look at the and returned to the now seemingly comparative safety of about.
copy you kept of the application form. Think about the kind Southway Road on Sunday evening. I still had my (sadly Take care out there
of questions you would ask if you were the interviewer and unused) attack alarm in my hand as I walked along the James Buller
plan how you would answer these. Think particularly of all
the questions you’d hate to be asked and work out reason-
able answers. It can do your confidence a power of good if Skills for Life
one of them comes up and you’re ready for it! By the way,
ave you ever wondered how Luther King made his challenge you that you’ll start enjoying it, and you will
we have a leaflet titled “The First Interview” in the Careers
Service which has some examples of commonly asked and
more difficult questions on the back cover.
H historical speech to thousands of people without any
fear, or how that woman persuades her boss to adopt
her views at every meeting. If you think your peer student,
never regret it.
Learn something new, non-academic, non-boring, learn a
skill for life. If I convinced you, or just raised your curios-
who presents his projects better than a professional TV pre- ity about the SDP, just email Rodney, and look in the notices
My second tip is to encourage you to be as positive as you
senter, is an extraordinary person, I would to be sorry to say section. Sid
can throughout the entire procedure. You can rest assured
that you are making a big mistake. Speaking in public,
that the employer wouldn’t even be interviewing you if they
doing presentations and teamwork are skills anyone can SKILLS DEVELOPMENT
didn’t think you could do the job, but you’ve still got to con-
learn and excel at. As students at Surrey we are so fortu- Are you one of those that find some people difficult to get
vince them that you’d really like to do it. Every year I meet
nate to have the opportunity of learning these skills as well on with? Perhaps want to improve the way you get on with
employers who say that Surrey graduates who they have
as many other talents we will never neglect. They are so others? If so, come to an Interpersonal Skills workshop tak-
interviewed have been technically very competent but that
important that you won’t survive without them, whether you ing place on Tuesday 17 November between 6pm and 8pm.
they haven’t always sold themselves. So make it your aim
are planing to become a multinational CEO, self employed This will be in Committee Room X, 1st Floor, Senate House
to show a bit of enthusiasm!
or a manual worker. Giving your views, dealing with stress, and is open to all students, free of charge.
and talking to others are normal working day activities, and
Russ Clark
all you can do is to be prepared. Come to the Skills This will be the last Skills workshop in the semester and any
Careers Service
Development Program. comments about the programme or suggestions for future
PS: Don’t forget that you can keep up with the latest vacan- workshops would be welcome. For more info or to give
A series of informal workshops where you will be able to comments, call Rodney on ext.3177 or e-mail
cy position by browsing the Careers Service web pages at
meet new friends, exchange ideas and build new abilities. If [email protected]
http://www.mis.surrey.ac.uk/misweb/careers/home.htm
you are one of those who finds learning a boring process I

Student Advice
NATIONAL BLOOD
SERVICE
Service
From Monday 2nd November, the Student Advice Service
The National Blood Service will be visiting the will be open for business from 10am to 4pm, Monday to
University at the following Friday during semester time at:
times next week:
Wey House Flat 2,
Tuesday 17th 1pm-5pm Surrey Court
(University Staff ONLY) telephone 9261 (direct line 01483 259261)
Wednesday 18th 11am-5pm and on email: [email protected]
STUDENTS
You are welcome to drop in and see us either for informa-
Thursday 19th 11am-5pm tion or to talk to someone privately. If you prefer you can
STUDENTS send us a note, telephone or email us.Gill Venables, who is
the Student Affairs Officer, is the sabbatical responsible for
Their unit will be parked in the Senate House Education and Welfare matters. Her office is still in the
car park. National Blood Service staff will be Union. She can be contacted on ext. 9228 or on email:
in the Students’ Union from 10am-4pm on [email protected]. The Help Desk/Job Shop and
THURSDAY 12th NOVEMBER to take the Tax Clinics will also be staying in the Union.
appointments for these sessions. The donation
process takes 45-60 minutes, and donors It is bound to take us a little time to settle in and we will be
should be able to resume normal activities grateful for your patience over the next few weeks.
immediately afterwards. Best Wishes,Liz Thompson,Welfare Advice Officer
ed981112.qxd 25/11/98 21:15 Page 11 (1,1)

Thursday October 12 1998 n Surrey Pride 11

Surrey Pride Star Profile First Past the Post - Commentary from It’s Grim up North (but the Beers Bloody
Number 4, Steve Russel Eddie Heardman Cheap)
nfortunately, I’ve only runs faster over winter, the former
This week sees our
probing attention turn
towards the Hockey
Club Chairman,
U managed two place selec-
tions to date! Let’s see if I
can improve on that record with
may be tried over fences.

Elsewhere, Mister Morose ignored

W
Yorkshire, 30/10 – 1/11/98
eekend trips are very
important to the moun-
taineering club, and this
adapt well to climbing on real
rock. We returned to the campsite
that evening for food, a campfire,
Sports Executive and Saturday’s Murphy’s Gold Cup at a racecourse absence of 20 months
long lost brother of Cheltenham. More on that later, to record a 13 length win at one was particularly important, as and Yorkshires finest feature.
Eusabio, as he invites but the British raiders to Australia Chepstow, while Keiron Fallon it was the first opportunity for Nice Cheap Beer!!!
us in typical Lloyd and America had varied levels of became only the fourth person to freshers to come. The journey up
Grosman style to, success. Four of the first seven at notch more than one double centu- to Yorkshire (land of cheap beer, We did more climbing the follow-
Look Through The Melbourne were from this side of ry when he rode his 200th winner and good climbs) was long and ing day at Caley Crag, where the
Open Curtains. the world, Persian Punch finishing this season on the flat last week. complicated, but we passed the climbing was slightly harder than
highest at third, with Yorkshire Trainer Paul Nicholls had a time with such classic games as the day before (particularly when
justifying his controversial inclu- remarkable seven winners on minibus twister. We finally got to hungover). Most of the climbs
Age? 21 (and the rest!) sion - at the expense of Aussie- Saturday, with his horses coming our campsite, at Otley, near Leeds, were just bouldering climbs, so
Dept? Economics. trained Bulta - by coming fifth in up trumps at Chepstow, Sandown at 1AM. The site was just a field, we did not need ropes all the time.
Nicknames?“Derek Duvall”, “Mr Chair”, “Buster”, “Shuffler” our best ever showing. and Wincanton. Sadly, this week, next to a pub, which we discov- Well, that’s the idea anyway, but
Measurements? 6’ 1”, 15 stone (approx). the ever popular Night Nurse, ered would stay open until when you get to the last move, and
Sporting interests? Apart from the obvious, watching the Saints At Kentucky, Desert Prince fin- twice champion hurdler, died at 2.30AM for us. During the night, realise that if you fall, it WILL
avoiding relegation (enjoy it for the last time, Shuffler!) ished a bruised and battered last the age of 28. we realised why we had had no hurt, you kind of wish you did
What do you look for in a woman? Shy, retiring, relaxed, following a coming together at the trouble finding a campsite at a few have a rope (as I found out on two
reserved, and easy going (really???). first corner, while Swain put a Back to the Murphy’s Gold Cup. days notice. Nobody in their right occasions). After this, the
Favourite drink? A jug of chez “Arnell/Haggart”, or Red bull brave fight in getting pushed to Senor El Betrutti is not very well mind (ie, everyone but us) would minibuses were packed, and the
and Vodka. third by a length. The final big flat weighted to repeat his shock vic- camp in Yorkshire in October. It club returned to the land of
Favourite food? Patsy’s sausage, beans and chips, alas no more. race of the season, the November tory at odds of 33-1 in last years was FREEZING. expensive beer and crap climbs…
Favourite music? I like both sorts of music, Country AND Handicap at Doncaster, saw Dato race. However, Queen of Spades Guildford.
Western. Star gaining third place behind should run well at 10’s in the two- The following morning was not
What does Surrey sport give you? It provides so much. Yavana’s Pace. Both may be and-a-half mile chase, which real- easy, especially since we had dis- If anyone is interested in joining
Conduct on the pitch gives such an insight into a persons per- clashing in the Champion hurdle ly signals the onset of the jumps covered that we had forgotten one the mountaineering club, come
sonality. Anyone consistently giving 110% on the sacred turf of in march, although if the ground season. of the gas stoves. We abandoned along to the wall on a Tuesday
the Varsity, will always finish a champion in the league table of the idea of making breakfast, and evening, or a Wednesday after-
life. An opportunity to socialise every night. And the freedom to Surrey University 1st XV 24 Brighton found the nearest café. We then noon, and meet the club, or visit
discipline “foolishness”. went on the Brimham Rocks, via a the USMC website for details on
Most memorable moment in Surrey Sport? In my 1st year
University 1st XV 12 climbing shop (after all, what are how to contact us.
he preparation for the third the victory. Brighton to their student loans for???), and did

T
scoring the winning goal in the 2nd XI’s B.U.S.A final victory.
Funniest moment? There’s been so many, anything involving game of the rugby BUSA credit continued to siege our line some excellent climbing. The T. O’Dwyer, (Comms. Officer)
Jan “I hate Mr ashtray” Dirk, Sparkie “hey Chin Chin don’t be season could not have and managed to get themselves beginners who came seemed to
shy” Thompson, Grant “can you take a joke mate” Taylor, or been better. The coach journey within five points after two quick
Chris “we hate Pompey” Hardman. Shuffling in public. down to Brighton was not the tries. 17 - 12 to Surrey with just Bristol Fire Blanks as Surrey Hit Home
usual fracas of jokes and (ahem) minutes to go and it was time to
Most embarrassing moment? Showering with the Badger.
Worst injury? See nicknames. other colourful stories but an dig deep and play with pride.
Bristol Bullets 0 Surrey Stingers 27
Do you have any sporting Superstitions? intense “talk” about tactics. So espite the fact that the refs Surrey defence to provide the
Praying that I escape injury, before a game.
Is Sex better before or after sport? Better before than after. In
the Varsity, for all to see (la poubelle and poison).
you can imagine that our pre-
match ritual was somewhat dent-
ed when we turned up at our
opposing University to find that
The battle became intense, penal-
ties were appearing left, right and
centre. One Brighton player even
mistook my head for the ball and
D for Sundays game did not
show up, both teams
decided to play, using experienced
offense with amazing field posi-
tion. Again, full advantage was
taken, this time by rookie, John
Who are your sporting role models? Bjorn Borg, Cassius Clay players from both sides as refs. Glover, to run in his first ever
and John Hartson (the premiership’s best looking player). The we had no opposition and no tried to punt me into touch (an That meant that the game was touchdown on his debut, making
ultimate has to be Stuart Pearce. When he scored that penalty where to change! Being the proud easy mistake to make, some played with a continuous clock the score 19-0. The Bullets contin-
against the Spanish during Euro 96, the pride coursing through men that we are, we simply shed might say!). Yet, the game con- and only lasted for 1 hour instead ued their frustrated efforts again
his veins was obvious for all to see. If we had had 11 players our attire at the side of the pitch tinued and was finally put beyond of the usual two and a half to three failing to move up field and
with that much passion whilst wearing the three lions in France and carried on regardless (modest all doubt when Tom Morgan hours and the result wouldn’t receiving yet more humiliation by
this year, the Jules Rimes would surely now be housed in too - Sports Ed)! superbly intercepted a Brighton count except for the psychological allowing their quarter back to be
Lancaster Gate. pass and proceeded to run for two value on the Bullets. sacked a total of six times. When
Which sports personality would you most like to meet? When the game finally got under- thirds of the pitch and score Surrey regained the drive up field
Muhammad Ali Pre-1978. way it was Surrey who were under the posts. Many a cry of The first game of the season saw a was quick and painless with
Sum yourself up in 3 words? Focused, and Dedicated whilst applying the pressure. Some “run you slag” was heard from squad of almost 50% rookies Adedayo Ashaye scoring again.
being Receptive to divergent opinion. excellent interchanging play the forwards, who were helpfully ready, willing and able to show Due to the lead Surrey then had,
Are obesity and lack of fitness an issue in the sport of hock- between forward and backs led to gathered in the centre of the their ability. From the start, the the two point conversion was suc-
ey? I’ve fortunately always been a yard quicker upstairs. ill-discipline amongst the pitch! Duffy duly slotted the two domination on the field by the cessfully attempted with a short
Therefore any perceived lack of speed/fitness is countered by Brighton boys and Surrey were points and the celebrations Stingers was obvious with a pass to Simon Jolly for two points,
mental agility. If only our West Country “friends” could claim soon three points clear thanks to began, although I wasn’t exactly touchdown scored by Adedayo leaving the final score at 27-0.
the same. Bristolians are not after all, renowned for their speed the sturdy left foot of “McDuff”. sure what was going on as my Ashaye. The extra point field goal
of thought. Surrey continued their team head appeared to have been left was then missed to leave Surrey Another rookie who showed his
When “Boy D” loses his “lean, hard, and sinewy torso” what approach and this led to a well on the field!! leading 6-0. The Surrey defence talent was Simon King, playing in
will he have left? I believe only a wardrobe containing a soiled taken try from Jeff Barratt, who took over the field and showed his first game at defensive end
dress with a year old residue and the knowledge he brought the sliced through the Brighton backs Ascot also bore the brunt of some their strength by stopping Bristol having an amazing day making
present administration to the verge of moral bankruptcy. line after a brilliantly executed opposition foul play as he had to dead in their tracks and even five tackles and one of the six
Now that you are a Star of the Pride, what question would “Kasparov” move. Rob Rock fur- leave the field after only two pushing them back providing sacks. Veteran Rob Scruby also
you like to see asked Gemma Herbertson, Sports ther increased the scoreline with a minutes when some kindly fellow excellent field position for the played excellently recording six
Administrator in next weeks edition? Following a partner’s cheeky scrum half dash down the stamped on his arm! All in all it offense. Full advantage of this carries for 80 yards as did Phil
nasal injury allowing no intense physical exertion, would it be blind side after more solid ruck- was a good team effort, a well was taken with Adedayo running McDonald with the longest carry
unethical for a member of staff to enter into a liaison with a ing from the wondrous warriors. fought and hard played game and in another touchdown in to take of the game at 35 yards. A special
canoeist? Thankyou Steve for a fascinating insight into the eventually a deserved win for the Surrey into half time leading 13-0. mention must go to the Bristol
world of Mens Hockey and indeed the mind of the man that is The second half however began ferocious fighters of the first fif- cheerleaders who braved the cold
Shuffler Russel. Anyone requiring a further insight is welcome rather poorly for Surrey as the teen. With the heart of a lion and After half time, the Stingers came weather to put on a show and
to view Buster as he performs his impression of exhibitionist well oiled machine seemed to be the pride of the pack, you take on out looking just as strong. Bristol made us feel very welcome in the
jazz exotica, currently playing through a Pickard 3 window near having a few technical problems the rugby club with terror on your returned the ball for a short gain bar. Dave Skinner
you. Step into the limelight, please, Miss Herbertson. and the WD40 became vital to back! The Boy Davis only to be held up by the stern
The New Breed Of Fresher An Altogether More Cautious Animal by Paul Cliff, Sports Editor
hey arrived amidst much hype and fierce all over the University. A creature of almost curries and the like. The result will be an increas- with the crest, and cleanse them with oils of the

T anticipation, facing a brave new world with

the keen eyes of the young and hopeful.
Nothing too much was amiss as they descended in
unimaginable power, capable of ripping the very
heart from our awesome Surrey Pride, it revealed
itself in a fury of text books, essay deadlines and
ing populous of unfulfilled, timid and Sportless
second years who will in three years time will rise
up and seize control of our Clubs, turning our train-
monkey and juice of the Loop. For those poor souls
who are corrupted so much that they resist your
initial attempts to save them, you must deceive
droves to the Freshers Fayre Festival of Sport and career aspirations and basked in the foul, decaying ing events into coursework meetings and our Club them into attending certain special cleansing cere-
signed their lives away to the Slavery of the Surrey stench of it’s bank balance. None shall ever forget Dinners into coffee mornings, before they plot and monies such as your Christmas Dinner, Curry night
Pride. Many fulfilled their promise and entered it’s reign of terror.....The Fresher Who Puts Work execute a ruthless plan to murder the Proud Surrey out, Hundreds Club or Pub Golf Event. Read
into the fray of various Sports Clubs trials and wel- Before Play! Lion and throw scorn on our beloved Surrey soothing passages to them from your Tour pro-
coming activities. All seemed to be going well..... Angel. They must not succeed. grams and assure them that the delicious dream of
Created by the evil system of Tuition Fees, this debauchery in a foreign land can be theirs if they
Unseen to many a non-fresher and graduate alike, new breed; this Nemesis, will repeatedly kidnap The plan is simple. You can easily identify those reject the ways of the academically dedicated. It is
there lurked beneath this elaborate mask of nor- freshers on Wednesdays and Saturdays and force who are possessed by the Demon by their shy your duty. The Lion expects.
mality, something strange, something new, some- them to undergo medieval torture such as course- manner and the unexplained cross by their name on
thing obscene. A Beast. Never seen before in these work, revision and The Presentation. They will teamsheets/ pubcrawl lists etc. Take them under Get Your Freshers Out For The Pride.
hallowed grounds it stalked, silently and preyed on force first years to mysteriously disappear at vital your wings in the name of the Surrey Angel, wrap
the expectations of Social Secretaries from Clubs social functions such as Silly Nights, FNO, Club them tightly in yellow and blue garments blessed
ed981112.qxd 25/11/98 21:15 Page 12 (1,1)

Surrey Pride
Student Dinghy Nationals 1998 Surrey Birds Wipe the Floor with Sussex
tions began again at the woefully inade- UniS 5 SUssex WFC 0
quate bar in Plymouth’s University hall,
ednesday last saw the latest chal- More shots on goal followed and eventually
where a big party for all the teams was held
well into the early hours of the morning.

Sunday dawned sunny and warm with a

W lenge for the USWFC. Maybe I
shouldn’t speak too soon, but
there just seems to be no stopping us at the
Di put in a superb shot past the golden goalie
to make it 2-0. By this time, along with the
shouts from our defence to keep up the atten-
moment. The women’s football club has tion, there were moans of boredom and tem-
light wind and some heavy hangovers. This
done it again and this time didn’t let one ball perature loss! Half time came and we had the
time there was no hesitation. All the fleets
in their net, or anywhere too near for that usual team talk by our cap-i-tan as well as
were sent out together and when the start
matter. Having won our previous game but harsh words to the kiddies in the corner who
gun went eighty Laser IIs charged across
having a week off due to the great St Mary’s weren’t listening. The start of the second half
the line. Dan and Steve had less successful
cancelling on us, we wondered if we were came after what seemed like an Eternity, and
day with some pretty poor results giving
still on form? The answer was blatantly yes. the call of ‘Biri’s ball’ confused all but
them a final result of thirty-fifth. Emma and
myself and Fraggle, who knew exactly what
Rob did considerably better though, finish-
We kicked of at the odd time of 2.15pm due was going..... on if only I could’ve got it
ing in the top twenty in every race however
to yet another mix up - will there be a BUSA right. The pass went straight to their player
he preparations for this year’s championships their retirement on Saturday gave them a

T began way back in the distant days at the

beginning of the semester with boats being
selected, tweaked, and tuned, and crews and helms
thirty-seventh overall position. Andy Wingate and
Andy Ford, Gavin Kenny and Rob Nichols, and
Howard and I finished every race in the bottom third
of the fleet, but I was happy with the amount of
game without organisation troubles? (no
offense to the sports office who were entire-
ly blameless.. I think!). This game was rather
unusual for the birds as not only did we have
who luckily kicked it straight back – don’t
you just love ball imprints on your legs!!!
Play continued and there was no slacking
from the Surrey team and very little change
pairing up and sailing on Wednesdays and Sundays at three whole substitutes, but Cyril wasn’t our of pace from the opposition. Our midfield
Datchet water reservoir. Friday the 6th saw the final improvement we had showed with each race (we
referee. The show must go on......and it did! were spreading the play around wonderfully,
team of ten sailors, five boats, eleven land crew/drink- managed a forty-eighth in last race).
resulting in The Cat scoring another goal and
ing support, four cars, one minibus, two trailers, and From a Sussex kick off, Surrey took posses- in true football style rounding it up with what
an ex-member set off in convoy along the M4 to The bus and cars were loaded in the pouring rain and
sion straight away and our trusty midfielders can only be described as interesting celebra-
Plymouth. The speedo and the exhaust pipe were bro- Emma’s car refused to start so we left them awaiting
started winding their way up the pitch. tions – that one definitely needs more prac-
ken, and we found that all the tires were at half their the AA and made our weary way back in the mini-bus
Within the first few minutes we’d got a few tice. Excellent play from Fraggle, Erica and
pressure but the radio worked and we were all in high to Datchet. The drivers Rob N and Andy F did an
shots in on goal, established that their goalie Lene, to name but a few continued, not to
spirits. The racing began with the Reading team over- excellent job staying awake while the rest of us slept,
was no walk over, and that they had a speedy mention the defence who didn’t have as
taking on the approach to Bristol and Brunel being worn out, in back-breakingly uncomfortable positions
defence – worst luck! However, this didn’t much as usual to do, but did it superbly.
reported some way ahead. amongst the heaps of wet, salty, smelly kit in the back.
prove too much of a problem and shortly in Fraggle and Biri sealed the victory with two
to the first half the trusty Katie ‘the Cat’, more goals leaving the final score 5-0. Great
On arrival at Plymouth we unloaded and set up the As we stood in the wind and rain at 1.30am unloading
scored followed by shouts from foghorn game, but we miss you Cyril!
boats, and checked in to the local back-packer’s hos- the bus I began to seriously doubt my sanity. Was I
Wright to stay calm and “con-cen-trate”.
tel. Seeing as an early night and a good sleep is the actually doing this for fun? But after some sleep and
Play continued in the same way with Surrey The celebrations continued well into the
best way to prepare for any championships the team a decent meal I can truthfully say that that the whole
taking control, much to the annoyance of night. Thanks to all the birds for my oh so
decided to go and get lashed down at the pub instead. weekend was absolutely brilliant and I can’t wait to
Sussex who were not too gentle in their tack- lovely mucky pint….and public apologies to
Liquid is after all an essential part of sailing. get back in the boat and start racing again. The sailing
les. There I was thinking shirt pulling and the team for not making it to Bo’s. Let it be
club is for me and the rest of the team not just some-
‘studs up’ wasn’t allowed! All credit to the known, however, this was not due to alcohol
The next morning was windy and cold. We rigged the thing we do to get off campus on a Wednesday after-
ref who seemed to find a balance between but to the fact I was a “Girlie Wuss”.
boats and waited in the sailing club dinghy park while noon, but something we get cold, wet, tired, broke,
unfair play and allowing the game to run. Fingers crossed for next week, but until
the race committee dithered over wind speeds and and dehydrated for. Hows that for Surrey Pride?
then watch out St Trinians about!
courses. The memory of last year’s force-8 carnage Lindsay Endean.
was obviously still clear. Eventually the Laser II fleet Badger’s Boys Bring Back Booty, Because Banfield’s Beau Bags a brace.
was allowed to launch and the racing began. The wind
was gusting up to 30 knots and the waves were rough- UniS 2nd XI 5 Lensbury 2nd XI 2.
ly three foot; harsh conditions for anyone, especially urrey’s finest left senate steps 45 minutes dive, and Surrey headed into the interval 2 goals to the whistle by his team. Which I found a touch
a team who train on inland waters. All I can tell you
about the Saturday racing is what I heard in the
warmth of the club house afterwards. Andy and Gavin
S after the agreed departure time, “Foolio”
drove off with the A-Z and we had trouble
shutting the minibus rear doors. I feared that it
the good. It was clear that if we could contain the
opposition’s “Ringer” we could easily plunder the
points. A tactical change was made with “Cut
frustrating. The game left us with a sour taste as
the opposition continued to cast aspirations at our
umpire’s decisions. I took particular offence to
failed to make the start and prudently decided to turn would be “one of those games”. We were howev- Throat” Jake assigned to snubbing out their main this, as Axe umpired well. If any accusation could
back before they broke something. Howard Gale and er bolstered by the return of our “Prodigal Son”, channel of attack. be levelled at him it would be that he was too
myself rounded the first mark going like a train but I welcomed back to the fold by the Benevolent The second half was a scrappy affair, the opposi- lenient towards our opposition’s "Hatchet men” at
then found that I lacked the experience to keep the Badger, refreshed & Zoviraxed from his recent tion added a goal from a short corner. With our the back. The fact that their umpire had little idea
boat upright in the rough sea going down-wind. Many transatlantic excursion. “post man” beaten by the spin rather than the of how to apply the rules and could be swayed by
power of the shot. The game was now back in the players in their favour would cause greater con-
frustrating capsizes followed before we too retired.
The game started badly with the opposition’s star balance and I began to fear a repeat of the capitu- cern to me.
Emma Burchell and Rob Basterfield were doing well
player scoring from a short corner, with only sec- lation we suffered on Wednesday. But my fears With both our teams winning on Saturday and an
until Emma lost her footing on the trapeze and fell in
onds on the clock. But Surrey soon struck back were to be unfounded as Matthew our “MOM” enjoyable tournament on Sunday the weekend was
the drink. Outside assistance from the rescue boat through our returning hero. The first’s for “The began rampaging through their defence combining only spoiled by our defeat by the USFC boat race
forced them to retire. Only Dan Howe and Steve Fist” he whooped. Surrey “turned the screw” with guile, pace and excellent balance. This resulting in team. Observers commented that two thirds of
Rockey saw the two races through to the finish, by our rejuvenated Dane adding another “I devote James our “prolific” centre-forward benefiting and their team were not current students, but perhaps
which time roughly half the fleet had retired. this to Babylon!” He bellowed. adding 2 more goals. Surrey were the winners. that’s just “clutching at straws” for the motive of
our defeat. Unkind voices blamed mark “Sumo”
We packed up and returned to the hostel for food and After four unsuccessful short corners, our ageing The game was not played in the best of spirits with Wearing, however I would never single out an
showers. Later in the evening the jostling for posi- sweeper finally breached the opposition goalie’s our opposition’s Umpire, being told when to blow individual for blame. Numero Quatre.

BUSA - Results - Wednesday 4/11/98 results The Fortress Stands Firm In the Face of Multiple
Opposition us them points Position Invasion
mens football 1stXI v So’ton Ins.(H) 1 4 0 6th/6 USFC 2 Worplesden 0
mens football 2nd XI v Sussex (H) 3 2 3 6th/6 nce again it was up to Captain across the goal for Tuner to notch his 6th of
mens football 3rd XI
mens football 4th XI
womens footbal 1st XI
v
v
v
Kingston (H)
Reading (A)
Sussex(H)
5
0
5
2
10
0
3
0
3
8th/10
8th/8
3rd/5
O Smithy to break out in war cry after
another dissapointing midweek
result. However, the master of deviance
the season, much to the dismay of the ‘Sty’.
Throughout the latter part of the game we
demostrated what could be created with con-
mens badminton 1st v Southbank(H) 7 2 3 1st/6 devised a battleplan to challenge Rommel. fidence and a positive attitude as we crushed
mens badminton 2nd v So’ton(H) 1 8 0 4th/5 With Dave Upton unavailable and Glenn the hopes of the opposition with some mag-
Johns AWOL, Smithy took a gamble. I found nificent wingplay through Casanova Batty
womens badminton v So’ton Ins(H) 6 3 3 1st/6
myself up front with Convict Hemmings as and Richie ‘I’m still bitter about getting
mens basketball v So’ton(H) concede -3 4th/7 my attacking partner, Verbal Harkness took killed on my birthday’ Butler. After 75 min-
mens fencing v Reading 7 20 6 2nd/7 the sweepers role, and last but not least, Beer utes Smithy and Bedford were replaced by
golf v Kingston(A) 4 2 9 1st/7 Monkey Bedford assumed the positon of Bricey and Matt `Trigga` Miller and was
mens hockey 1st v Sussex(H) 9 2 4 4th/5 centre midfield playmaker. These changes shortly followed by another fine move
mens hockey 2nd v Chichester(H) 3 5 1 7th/10 appeared to work well, as we created a bag- involving Tuner and Batty. The result was a
womens hockey 1st v Kingston(A) 3 11 6 2nd/5 ful of chances in the first half, with spontaneously hit strike from Windy with his
womens hockey 2nd v Sussex(H) 0 1 0 5th/5 Monkeyboy missing the best of opportunities first touch of the game. 2-0. The win com-
netball 1st v Roehampton(A) 42 27 6 5th/7 when he met a Tuner cross only to have his plete, celebrations spilled forth, not unlike a
downward header cleared off the line. flowing waterfall, as Tokin’ found a new
netball 2nd v So’ton Inst.(H) 35 21 6 8th/9
whipping boy in the shape of the Convict,
mens rugby 1st xv v Brighton(A) 24 12 9 2nd/7 By the second half we had become a little who decided to upgrade his prison cell for a
mens rugby 2nd xv v Brighton(A) 5 30 9 2nd/7 desperate before relief came in the form of Stag Hill bog. “Goodnight Sweetheart, I’m
womens tennis v B’rnmouth(A) 4 2 3 6th/6 Butler’s venomous strike at the opposing out with the lads.....but not for long!”
Profiles like Shuffler’s perpetuate the “Pride” in Surrey Sport?! Love Al and Si’s bird. keeper. As it rebounded Stonemason Tuner
Hemmings stumbled over and kneed the ball