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Dfps-Ta 567

This document provides tips for child care providers to guide children's behavior in a positive manner. It suggests keeping rules simple, using positive language like "do's" instead of "don'ts", talking to children respectfully at their level, praising good behavior, teaching conflict resolution, and involving children in making and following rules. The overall guidance is to focus on teaching life skills to help children learn and grow at each developmental stage.

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75 views2 pages

Dfps-Ta 567

This document provides tips for child care providers to guide children's behavior in a positive manner. It suggests keeping rules simple, using positive language like "do's" instead of "don'ts", talking to children respectfully at their level, praising good behavior, teaching conflict resolution, and involving children in making and following rules. The overall guidance is to focus on teaching life skills to help children learn and grow at each developmental stage.

Uploaded by

api-507706529
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
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Basic Tools for Guiding Young Children’s Behavior

Children need adults to teach them important life skills. They need to know the rules — what is okay and
what is not okay. As a child care provider, your knowledge about how children learn and grow will help you
guide children in ways they can understand at each age level. For example, a two-year-old has limited under-
standing and needs a lot of redirection, but a five-year-old can learn to be a good problem solver. Here are
some basic tips for guiding children's behavior. Remember that different strategies work best at different ag-
es.

Keep rules simple and easy to understand. Discuss rules with children and write them down. Consider
children’s suggestions for rules. Repeat the rules often.

A few rules that work well with children include:

 We help each other.


 We take care of our toys.
 We say please and thank you.
 We are kind to each other

Say what you mean. Use do’s instead of don'ts. Choose your words carefully, especially when you are guiding
children's behavior. Keep sentences short and simple. Focus on what to do rather than what not to do.

Try saying: Slow down and walk. Instead of: Stop running.
Try saying: Come hold my hand. Instead of: Don’t touch anything.
Try saying: Keep your feet on the floor. Instead of: Don’t climb on the couch.
Try saying: Use your quiet voice inside. Instead of: Stop screaming and shouting.

Talk with children – not “at” them. Children often don’t hear you when you are talking (or shouting) “at”
them. You will be much more effective if you get down on their level, look them in the eyes, touch them on the
shoulder, and talk with them.

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Set a good example. Children watch you all the time. They see how you talk to other children and adults. They
see how you cope with anger or frustration. They watch how you deal with sadness and joy. They listen to how you
say “I’m sorry.” The way you handle the ups and downs of life teaches children a lot about how to behave and get
along with others.

Encourage children to set good examples for each other. Children also learn a great deal from each other.
Encourage appropriate ways to share, play, and be kind to each other.

Give clear, simple choices. Toddlers can choose between a red cup and a green cup. Preschoolers can choose
between playing “airport” and “zookeeper.” Give children a choice only when there is a choice. For example, saying
“It is nap time, do you want to lie down now?” is not really an option if your rule is that everyone will rest at nap
time.

Show respect for children. Talk to misbehaving children in private, remind them of the reasons for rules, and
discuss what they can do differently.

Catch children being good. All children want attention. It is better to give them positive attention for good be-
havior than negative attention for misbehavior. Comment on something positive about each child each day. Better
yet, strive for several times a day.

Praise like a good coach instead of a cheerleader. A cheerleader just shouts general praise: “What a great
job!” or “What a beautiful picture.” A good coach tells you what you’re doing right, uses praise as a teaching tool,
and lets you know why he or she is proud of you. If a child sets the table, you might say, “You did such a good job
setting the table! You put the spoons and forks in the right place and remembered the napkins!” When you look at
a child’s painting you might remark, “This painting just glows with color! You used blue, green, red, yellow, and
orange. Tell me how you did this?”

Share the good news. Remember to share children’s good behavior with others. When children have done
something good, mention it to other children and to parents.

Use play activities to teach children social skills. Use children’s books that show how children resolve
problems. Play “what if” games. Become a character in children’s pretend play and show children how to use good
manners and be kind to a doll.

Teach children how to resolve conflict and problem solve. Help them recognize feelings, identify the
problem, come up with ideas for solving the problem, and try possible solutions.

Teach children how to apologize. Learning how to apologize is a skill. Young children have a hard time un-
derstanding another child’s feelings, but by the time they are 4 years old they should begin to recognize that apolo-
gizing is a good way to make up for hurting someone else. Teach preschoolers and school-age children the four
basic steps of apologizing: look at the other child, say the child’s name, say “I’m sorry,” and say why. Keep it sim-
ple: e.g., "Lucas, I'm sorry I hit you." With time and practice, children will not have to be prompted, and their
apology will be more genuine.

Teach children how to correct the effects of their behavior. For example, if a child marks on the wall,
give him/her a wet cloth to clean it off.

These resources are brought to you by the Cooperative Extension System and your local institution. eXtension provides objective and research-based
information and learning opportunities that help people improve their lives. eXtension is an educational partnership of 74 universities in the United States.
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