Impress a girl

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Updated: March 10, 2020
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Impressing a Girl that You Don't Know Well
Impressing a Friend
Questions & Answers
Tips and Warnings
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Article Summary

Do you want to wow that certain girl? Though you can't control how she feels
and make her fall in love with you, you can make yourself seem more desirable
to her. Here are two methods for impressing a girl: first for a girl you don't
know well, and second for a girl who says she's only interested in friendship.
Method 1
Impressing a Girl that You Don't Know Well
1.

1
Dress to impress. Not only will you look and smell more attractive, taking
care of your grooming shows her that you're mature and capable of important
daily tasks.[1] Also pay attention to the style of clothes that she wears, and
wear the same style of clothing, this will help her to relate with you and find
you overall more attractive. And pay particular attention to these areas:
 Shower at least once a day. Wash your hair, soap up all over, and
rinse off. Use a nice smelling shower scrub as well, something not too
feminine, but not too masculine either, maybe try a smell like mint, or
lemon.
 Keep your mouth clean. Brush twice daily, floss, and use
mouthwash. For help in the middle of the day, use breath mints and
chewing gum.
  Manage facial hair by shaving daily. If you're growing facial hair,
make sure it's trimmed to a uniform length, and not scraggly or unruly.
If you tend to have a unibrow, consider plucking any stray hairs over
your nose.
 Wear a combination deodorant-antiperspirant. Apply it as soon as
you get out of the shower in the morning. Make sure it also doesn't
smell too feminine or too masculine either.
 Wear clean clothes. If you find yourself scrambling for fresh
laundry, consider setting up a regular washing schedule, like doing all
your laundry every Sunday night.
Tip: Go easy on the cologne. You can use a few sprays of cologne or body
spray, but don't go over 2.
2.

2
Be polite. Being well-mannered doesn't mean you're boring — it means you
know how to treat other people with respect, a quality most girls want in their
boyfriends.[2] Show her you know how to be considerate by doing these things
for everyone, not just her:
 Say "please," "thank you" and "you're welcome." As well as asking
with a "I'd appreciate it if" or "I would like for you..."
 If someone is walking through a door behind you, hold it open for
him or her.
 Avoid cursing or saying anything crude in public, or in mixed
company. It's fine to relax a little around your friends, but try to show
your best side around people you don't know well.
 For more help, see How to Have Good Manners.
3.

3
Think before you speak. Everyone slips up and says stupid things, but try
your best to limit it when you're around this girl. Take a few seconds to
evaluate what you're going to say before you spit it out.
  Don't talk up other girls. You might think making her jealous is a
good idea, but steer clear. Discussing the looks of other girls in front of
her will make you seem shallow and fickle. As far as she knows, she's
the only one you're interested in.
 Avoid coming off as a bully. Don't throw out careless insults or put
other people down, even if they're meant to be funny. She might not
be able to pick up on your humorous tone and take your words at face
value.
 Don't tell dirty jokes. There's a time and place for wicked humor —
and it's when you're hanging out with your guy friends. Keep on a lid
on it when you're around her.
4.

4
Pay her a sincere compliment. One thing you should say when you're
around her is a nice, genuine compliment.[3] It's not as difficult as it seems!
Here's what to do:
 Think of what you like best about her. It could be her smile, her
laugh, her intelligence — whatever strikes you as her best quality. (The
only caveat to this is that you should not compliment her on any
physical traits except her eyes or her smile. She might have a great
figure, but now's not the time.)
 Do it semi-privately. You don't have to get her completely alone to
pay her a compliment, but try not to do it with all of her friends or your
friends listening closely. You could also pull it off in a text or instant
message.
 Keep it short and sweet. No need to wax poetic for three or four
minutes on her best qualities. A simple one-liner will do.
 Pay attention to how you word it. Instead of saying "That's a pretty
dress" or "I like your outfit," say "You look really great in that dress."
Compliment the woman, not the article of clothing!
 Get the body language right. Smile! Keep eye contact while you
say it, too.
5.
5
Make her feel special. Find little ways to let her know that you think she's an
extraordinary person, and she'll definitely notice.
 Don't ignore her or play hard to get. If she texts you, text back. If
she wants to talk, try to make the time even if it's slightly inconvenient.
 Go out of your way to help her. If she could use a hand with
something, offer your assistance! It could be carrying heavy or
cumbersome items, going with her to run an errand, or talking to her
through a difficult situation.
 Let her talk. The #1 mistake when talking to a girl is focusing on
yourself. Girls are way more comfortable when they talk about
common interests. Ask about her interests, hobbies, favorite books,
music, etc. If she asks you a question, answer it in a few, short
sentences and then redirect the question back at her. This engages her
in the conversation.
 Start an inside joke with her! By doing this the two of you will share
a secret connection that is shared between only the two of you. This
will make her feel special, included and closer to you. It will also give
you an easy-to-come-up-with conversation starter. But keep in mind, if
you overuse the inside joke, it could quickly go from fun to boring, so
only use it when you must.
2
Method
Impressing a Friend
1.

1
Spend time on self-improvement. Dedicate the hours you would otherwise
spend with her (or thinking about her) to feeling better about yourself. You'll be
a new and improved guy with better self-confidence, whether or not she's
interested in that at the end of the day. Remember that you're not doing it for
her right now — you're doing it for you, so that you feel like the best version of
yourself.[4]
 Take control of your life. If there's some aspect of your life that
currently feels out of control — whether it's school, your career, or
 finances — now's the time to rein it back in. Figure out what you need
to do to stabilize your situation and feel like you're back on track. Then
go do it — don't waste any more time stressing about it. Yes, girls are
attracted to men who seem like they're in control of their lives. But
even better, you'll feel confident and self-assured that things are going
your way, because you've made it so.
 Cultivate a new hobby or interest. Is there a sport you've always
wanted to try? Or a subject you've always wanted to learn more about?
Now's the time! Devote yourself to whatever extracurricular interest
strikes your fancy and make it your new focus. Girls are interested in
people who are interesting, and having hobbies or outside activities
make you interesting.
Tip: Step up your grooming. Try making your routine a little more rigorous, and
see how it affects your self-esteem. Amp up your skincare, try a different
hairstyle, shower more regularly, try a new cologne, and so on.
2.

2
Get some space away from her. It's the hardest thing to do when you're
crazy about a girl, but it's the only sure way to get out of the friendzone. If you
want her to see you in a different light, you have to take some away time so
your relationship can reset when you start interacting again.
 Commit to being in minimal contact with her for at least 3 or 4
weeks. It sounds like forever, but you can do it! Be polite when you see
her, but don't hang out with her, don't engage in long phone calls,
don't go on dates, and answer her texts with replies that are short and
to the point.
 If she asks why you're being so distant, say that you're taking some
time to refocus your priorities. Tell her it's not personal, you're just
working on accomplishing goals in other areas of your life. Most girls
like someone motivated and ambitious; even if she's distraught that
you're not spending as much time with her, this is as good a reason as
you can give.
3.
3
Make a new first impression. After you've been away for a while, you'll have
the chance to make another "first" impression when you're ready to interact
with her again. If you can play it the right way, she'll start to see you in a whole
new light.
 Look your best. Put extra effort into looking as good as possible
when you feel like you're getting close to seeing her again. That way,
your next meeting won't catch you off-guard.
 Make your intentions clear. If you want her to see you as boyfriend
material, act like it! Flirt with her. Maintain eye contact. Pay her a
smoldering compliment. Don't just fall into old habits and act like you
worship the ground she walks on. Make her feel special, but not at the
cost of lowering yourself.
4.

4
Don't offer your time so freely. Instead of being constantly available for her
whenever she wants, make her work a little for your attention. For instance,
you're not available to come over and watch romantic comedies with her while
she complains about her latest break-up; however, you are available to take
her to dinner on Friday if she's interested.
Tip: Draw a clear line between things you used to do for her in the friendzone,
and things you're willing to do for her as a potential boyfriend. Be vigilant
about sticking to this difference.
5.

5
Don't waste time. After you re-initiate contact, don't wait months to ask her
out or otherwise move the relationship to the next level. Do it within the week.
 Ask her out on a date that is clearly romantic. That means: dinner,
on the weekend, just the two of you. She'll get the hint.
  State your feelings for her in a clear, confident way. Let her know
that you're interested in being more than friends. Tell her you'll accept
her decision if she's not interested, but you can't keep languishing in
the friendzone.
 Break the touch barrier. Hold her hand, give her a hug, offer to
cuddle, or otherwise get physical contact on the table. Especially if the
touch barrier was a characteristic of your earlier interactions, this is a
pretty clear way to send her a message.
 Remember that old Sean Connery movie quote: "The key to a
woman's heart is an unexpected gift at an unexpected time." The gift
doesn't have to be extravagant — try something as simple as a single
flower or her favorite treat. Don't make a big deal about giving it to
her, just do it with a smile and accept her thanks gracefully.
6.

6
Accept her decision. If you've tried everything to impress her and she's still
not interested in dating, back away gracefully.[5] Sometimes the spark just isn't
there. You tried your best, and there are other girls out there who will
appreciate the person you are. Move on with confidence