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Chapter 10
Easier to Live with than a Wife: The Concubine
We keep hetaerai for pleasure, concubines for the daily care of our bodies, and wives for the bearing of legitimate children and to keep faithful watch over our house.
—PseudoDemosthenes, Against Neaera (122)
Isn't a hetaera easier to live with than a wife? Yes, far more, and for good reason. For the wife under law can keep her home even though she has contempt for it. But the harlot
knows that she must buy her man with the way she treats him, or take off and find another.
—Fragment of the comedy Athamas by Amphis
uses permitted under U.S. or applicable copyright law.
The above quotation from the speech Against Neaera is almost invariably found in studies of Athenian social life, inasmuch as it states, with unabashed frankness, the
view of women as servants to men, and also because it documents the moral and legal sanction extended to prostitution in Attica. Little attention, however, is paid to
Copyright 1993. University of California Press.
the middle category in the speaker's enumeration, the concubine, who is responsible for ''the daily care of men's bodies.'' If men could satisfy their sexual needs with
prostitutes without incurring social censure, and if they had indoctrinated their wives in the virtues of meekness and industry, why did they require the further services of
concubines? For apparently many men, especially later in life, wound up in such habitual extramarital relationships.
The Sexual Career of the Perfect Gentleman
The model Athenian gentleman, the "beautiful and good" (kalos kagathos), probably started his sexual experimentation in youth as the "beloved" of a mature man,
who would copulate with him and
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offer social and intellectual favors. The youth was introduced to heterosexual intercourse at a symposium, where he could develop a supremacist stance by making
slave prostitutes submit to dorsal sex. The practice of humiliating and battering older prostitutes at drinking parties helped him to overcome the lingering mother image
in his soul. Soon he began going to brothels and private pimps to rent a succession of prostitutes, with whom he engaged in revels and symposia. Society afforded him
a long rope of tolerance; promiscuity, group sex, drinking, and violent "pranks" were standard ingredients of this phase. When no longer very young, our hero brought
home a child bride whom he had not previously met. His new wife entered his home, cowed and terrorized, both by the separation from her own family and the
overdramatized prospect of defloration. If she survived the hazards of teenage motherhood, she probably developed, as a mature woman, feelings of frustration and
hostility against her husband. By then our hero was a fullfledged member of the male community and was probably taking his turn as a lover of boys—getting even, in
a way, for the humiliations of his own youth. With the onset of middle or old age he began to yearn for more tender attentions, regular companionship, and personal
care; at that time, he would take a concubine (pallake). With her he entered into an informal, essentially monogamous, quasimarriage of undetermined duration, in
which he held all the power.
His wife, though restricted in her movements, had enjoyed at least some protection and legal recourse, especially if she was of a prominent family and still had her
relatives' support. With the help of a male relative she could turn to the city magistrate and put forward the charge of "ill treatment" (kakosis). She could sue for
divorce for cause and reclaim her dowry, thus making life difficult for her husband, especially if he had invested the dowry. The prostitute, too, had a measure of
protection: her pimp or owner regarded her body as an investment. In contrast, the concubine had neither safeguard, and, once installed, was at the mercy of her
keeper. The attractiveness of the arrangement to the man was enhanced by her freedom to entertain his guests and accompany him to other hosts' parties: both
Aspasia and Neaera had social contacts with men other than their lovers, which legal wives could not have. In all probability most concubines were former prostitutes,
and not subject to social censure. The Greek word pallake has no
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precise legal meaning and can refer to women living in nonlegalized relationships whether they had slave, free, or freedwoman status. It is evident from the courtroom
speeches that even citizen women who had lost the support of their families occasionally entered into such irregular arrangements.
The Slave Concubine
With regard to female slaves offered by their owners for sexual purposes, men who had money had every conceivable option. They could visit brothels for quick
sexual release, rent the more desirable prostitutes and slave entertainers for a night or for a party, lease them for longer periods, or buy them outright. Not infrequently,
as we have seen, men pooled their money to buy a slave prostitute for joint use.
It also must have been common for men to have habitual sexual relationships with female slaves who had grown up in their households; but this form of concubinage
would only rarely result in any documentation. We should probably assume that slave women, if they were lucky, might derive some benefit from their charms if they
succeeded in interesting their owners in something more than casual copulation. However, the one account we have of the fate of a slave concubine illustrates the
horrible pitfalls along the path of this career. The story is told in Antiphon's speech Against the stepmother, and there is no reason to doubt its veracity, since the
pallake's fate is peripheral to the issue. The speech was cited in Chapter 3 as an example of the "namelessness" of Athenian women; neither the accused, the
"stepmother," nor the slave concubine has a name. The accused and her deceased husband, the alleged murder victim, had frequently extended hospitality to a friend
by the name of Philoneos and to his unnamed concubine, who was obviously his slave. Philoneos had tired of the woman sexually and intended to turn her over to a
brothel for exploitation—not selling her but keeping her there for revenue, an arrangement which to my knowledge is not elsewhere attested. If the girl was not a
seasoned prostitute, her terror at this prospect can only be imagined.
At the same time the head of the household had also developed a roving eye, and his wife, the "stepmother," approached the pallake with a proposition: during a
dinner party the girl was to serve the two men a love potion that would restore their desire for their
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respective mates. As usual, the slave concubine, but not the wife, feasted with the men. According to the accusation, the potion was poisonous. Believing it to be a
harmless aphrodisiac, the slave administered the philter, and both men died—Philoneos immediately, and the husband after an illness of twenty days. The slave was
arrested, routinely tortured for information by wracking on the wheel, and executed without trial. Although the accuser represents the slave as acting in innocence, he
nevertheless considered that she was treated "as she deserved" (1, 20). If sympathy for slaves had been conceivable in Athenian culture, it would have been to the
accuser's advantage to dramatize the way that the defendant had tricked the slave into administering a poison; but the jury evidently was not susceptible to feelings of
indignation on behalf of so humble a creature.
A much less serious hazard of the slave concubine was that of being caught in the middle of that curious and typically Athenian institution, an exchange of estates
(antidosis). Wealthy Athenians were obliged, by way of contribution to the city, to finance public events and utilities, some of them extremely costly. A private person
might, for example, be called upon to underwrite a performance of a tragedy or to outfit a warship. If a subject of this form of taxation felt unjustly treated, and
believed that another citizen had more ample means, he could challenge this person to take over his contribution. The challenged citizen in turn could counter this
unwelcome invitation by proposing a complete exchange of estates. In such a case, the entire property of the two citizens, including their slaves, had to be
exchanged—a drastic, but probably effective, means of preventing tax evasion.
A confusing and somewhat lurid story concerning the fate of a prostitute in such a case is set forth in Lysias' speech On the Wound (4). The plaintiff and the defendant
had agreed upon an exchange of their properties, an arrangement that was afterwards annulled. A slave concubine who had been part of one of the estates thus
changed bed fellows twice; evidently both men liked her services and they decided to use her jointly, after making some kind of financial settlement to that effect. The
plaintiff, it seems, was keeping the woman to himself without making the corresponding monetary adjustment with the other owner, thus causing the dispute. Although
this speech may in fact have been composed for training purposes, rather than for an actual law suit, it nonetheless documents social mores.
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Surviving courtroom speeches reveal several cases of men buying women to serve as their concubines. As Plutarch said,
Isn't it true that respectable women have the reputation of being hostile and insufferable, with their severity and eaglebeaked faces? They call them Furies because they are
always nagging their husbands. And when one's legitimate wife becomes intolerable, isn't it best to take a companion like Abrotonon of Thrace or Bacchis of Miletus, without any
form of engagement? You just buy them outright and scatter a few nuts over their head. (Amat. 753d)
The "scattered nuts" are a reference to the ritual of the "downpourings" (katachysmata), used upon the arrival of both brides and new slaves. Bringing a purchased
concubine into the women's quarters when a legitimate wife was already there was, however, marginal behavior. In Demosthenes' speech For Phormio, part of the
scurrilous picture drawn of the defendant is that he had "married off one hetaera and bought another one free,'' even though he had a wife (36, 45). If the wife was in a
position to protest, she would have cause to do so. Alcibiades' wife, for instance, did lodge a complaint.
By and large the fate of those slaves who had sexual contact with their owners, although not enviable, was probably better than that of the many who had no such
opportunity to ingratiate themselves.
The Free Concubine
The amusing comedy by Félicien Marceau, La Bonne Soupe, was produced under the title The Good Soup on Broadway, but perhaps should have been called The
Gravy Train in English. In this play the prostitute heroine decides she is too good for walking the streets and looks for a man to keep her. Her method entails first
determining the man's financial eligibility by testing the quality of his socks, and then simulating desire and sexual fulfillment with abundant groans.
In the same way, for many of the free prostitutes of Athens hooking a prosperous older man with a need of "care for his body" must have been the only hope of
escaping misery in their declining years. Many succeeded, for, as a character in a fifthcentury comedy by Susarion said, "Woman's an ill, but, fellow townsmen,
still/No house can be a home without such ill" (Fr. 3; trans. John Maxwell Edmonds). If a free prostitute or other alien managed to win the
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affection of a prominent man, she had the possibility of living a comfortable life. Pericles' Aspasia apparently fared well through her relationship with the city's leader.
Neaera enjoyed many amenities while she was the pallake of Phrynion. In Demosthenes (48, 55) an accused man is said to have bought the freedom of a hetaera,
and taken her into his house; this relatively fortunate woman "had much gold jewelry and beautiful clothes and was going out in brilliant fashion." The orator Isocrates
installed Lagisca as his concubine, and Sophocles too is said to have had an illegitimate wife on whom he fathered children. Late sources name two wives of Socrates,
not only the notorious Xanthippe, but also one Myrto. If this account is genuine, Myrto was probably a concubine.
According to postClassical sources, Athens during the Peloponnesian War passed a law that legitimized the offspring of men and their concubines, even if the fathers
also had citizen wives. This information is highly suspect (Flacelière, Daily Life, 74). Nevertheless, some men deliberately sired children on their concubines. The
offspring of these unions, while not endowed with full citizenship, did not lack some civic status. Official "bastard lists" were kept; and outside the city of Athens a
special gymnasium, called Cynosarges and held sacred to Heracles, was constructed for the special use of those who were not of pure Athenian blood (Dem. 23,
213).
Since no records of female citizens were kept, it seems highly likely that a few women managed to wheedle their way into legitimate standing, with or without the
connivance of their men. Neaera's daughter, Phano, after all, managed to hook two Athenian citizens as husbands, one of whom became a kingarchon.
But for most, the path of concubinage was slippery. Demosthenes' speech Against Aristogiton (25, 56–8) contains the account of a free alien woman named Zobia,
who had housed the defendant after he had broken jail, and later had given him clothes and money for his escape out of town. Eventually she claimed some
recompense from him. In return he accused her of defaulting on taxes and dragged her before the "sales room of the alien registry." If found guilty of tax arrears, she
would have been sold into slavery.
The legal position of commonlaw wives was pitiable. No laws to protect the wellbeing or the interests of concubines per se are known. A curious statute, however,
referred to in Lysias' speech On the Murder of Eratosthenes (31), gave a man the right to kill
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anyone copulating with his pallake if caught in the act, but only if he was keeping the woman for the purpose of having children. In other words, the law protected not
the woman but her keeper's interest in her.
On losing her lover's affection and financial support, a concubine had no other resort than to return to a life of prostitution, as we saw in the fictitious but realistic case
of Chrysis, the "Woman of Samos," in Menander's comedy of that name.
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