Book, Music & Lyrics by

Molly Bell & Daya Curley

PERUSAL SCRIPT

www.stagerights.com
BECOMING BRITNEY
Copyright © 2008 by DAYA CURLEY & MOLLY BELL
All Rights Reserved

All performances and public readings of BECOMING BRITNEY are subject to royalties. It is fully protected
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 PRODUCTION HISTORY

Becoming Britney had its world premiere

August, 2008 at The Bleecker Street Theatre, New York City
as part of The New York International Fringe Festival.

A West Coast Premiere followed at

Center REP in Walnut Creek, California in late 2010.

Another production premiered in February 2012 at

The Retro Dome in San Jose, California.

All three productions were directed by Daya Curley with Molly Bell playing Britney.
 CHARACTERS
BRITNEY – An über famous and self-involved pop star. Self-destructive and frivolous.
Or is she? There are flashes of someone more stable underneath, maybe pretending to
be dumb. Maybe. Either way, she is our heroine. Range: Pop Soprano Belt: Low F to
High F (High Ab in “My I Want Song”, but only a 16th note. Lower key available for this
song, down a whole step.)

MODERATOR/MAMA – As the Moderator she's a grounded Mother/God figure. Cliché-

spouting, but a nurturing and sincere person. As Mama, she often defaults to frightening
and bossy. She's got a fast boil and she comes off as a little crazy. But we eventually
see some of her pain and regret. Range: Strong belter, Low F# to High F, ad-libs riffs. If
necessary, the high ad-libs can be a little lower in pitch.

MAN 1 – Flamboyant. Smart ass. He represents Britney’s defense against bullshit. Also
plays the following: Mr. Hobojangles; Pageant Consultant; Husband; Manager; Lawyer;
Interventionist. Range: Male Ensemble - Highest note for Tenor: Ab

MAN 2 – A little clueless. He represents the inappropriate and shameless honesty of

Britney’s filter-less reactions. Also plays the following: The Agent; Construction Worker;
Casting Director 3; High School Boyfriend; Justin; K-Fed; Cooter; Bodyguard. Range:
Justin - Db below Middle C to Eb; K-Fed - E below Middle C to high A; Male Ensemble -
Highest note for Tenor: Ab

WOMAN 1 – Tough-talking, no nonsense. But a soft center. She represents the part of
Britney that comes off as harder than she actually is. Also plays the following: Hooker;
Casting Director 2; Cameron; Paris; Jamie Lynn; Stylist. Range: Female Ensemble—
Highest note for Soprano: B

WOMAN 2 – Ready to please, and needy, she represents Britney’s insecurity and lack
of ability to self-monitor. Also plays the following: Little Britney; Star Not To Be; Casting
Director 1; Hometown Lady; Minister; Lupe; Lindsay; Psychoanalyst. Range: Female
Ensemble—Highest note for Soprano: B

STAGE MANAGER (JERRY) – This character is a flexible male/female role and can be
played by the actual stage manager of the production. The name can change to the
SM’s actual name or can be anything else you want. It works best if the SM is on a mic,
but in a smaller venue that may not be necessary. Speaking only.

TIME
Early 2007, immediately after Britney's very public head-shaving incident.
So, you know, a period piece.

SETTING
Assorted locations in the mind and memory of Britney. The main setting is inside
Britney’s own mind, and her remembrances bring us to various locations in her past.
 RUNNING TIME
90 minutes, no intermission

AUTHOR’S NOTES
This play is satirical fantasy, an homage to musical theatre filtered through the prism of
Britney's public timeline prior to and including her head-shaving incident. The show can
be performed using a live four-piece band or with fully orchestrated performance tracks.
In the three original productions, there was also projected video playing on a screen
throughout the entire play. The nature of the video clips ranged from titles, to realistic
motion backgrounds indicating location, to abstract graphics for color and movement.
Music and sound effects were embedded in the video clips. For your production, we
have slide projections available should you choose to present the piece in this
multimedia way, but projections are not absolutely necessary to mount the show.
Someone in the booth or wings, preferably the stage manager, also takes part and has
a few short lines of dialog. One of the songs is a pre-recorded pop track which should
have pre-recorded vocals that allow Britney to lip-sync instead of sing that number. The
lip sync is part of the joke and is mentioned in the next scene.

The timeline begins immediately after the infamous incident. The action opens inside
her head, where "The Opening Number" presumably plays on a continuous loop. But
today, the day of Britney's head-shaving, something is wrong. Throughout the opening
number we become aware something is amiss, something out of the ordinary. Nothing
is working quite right. At the conclusion of the number, Britney is pulled into her own
head and presented with a rehab setting, which offers her the opportunity to repair
herself with the aid of the other characters.

Even though Britney doesn't understand exactly where she is or what is happening, she
allows it, and what follows are recreations of highlights in her life and career, building to
a teaching moment for Britney, the discovery of a new way to survive reality by staying
inside her head where it's warm and friendly and full of musicals. Both worlds of musical
theatre and celebrity are paid homage and skewered.

In addition to Britney, there are five other main characters. The group rehab session is
led by a Moderator, who also doubles as Britney's mother. The other four, each with
their own idiosyncrasies, are named Man 1, Man 2, Woman 1 and Woman 2. These
actors also briefly play myriad other characters.

At the conclusion of the play, the audience should feel sympathy for Britney, happiness
that she's found some peace by deciding to stay where the pressures of the outside
world will not contribute to her self-destructive behavior. While this peace may not be
easily definable (when is it ever?), a positive mood should permeate. There should be a
sincerity to the final scenes. This is not tragedy. Musical theatre has saved her soul!
Hazzah! Now she can move forward with renewed spirit. We have given Britney a
comeback and found a happy conclusion to her seriocomic public story.
 MUSICAL NUMBERS

#1 Some Sort of Overture ............................................................................ Britney, Company

#2 The Opening Number .............................. Moderator, Woman 1, Woman 2, Man 1, Man 2
#3 Promises ................................................. Moderator, Woman 1, Woman 2, Man 1, Man 2
#4 …Millionaire Whore ................................................................................. Britney, Company
#5 Stop It! .......................................................................................................... Britney, Mama
#6 Here We Are ........................................................................................... Britney, Company
#6A Here We Are (Playoff) ..................................................................................... Instrumental
#6B Underscore ..................................................................................................... Instrumental
#7 America’s Sweethearts ...................................... Britney, Moderator, Woman 1, Woman 2,
...................................................................................... Man 1, Man 2, Justin, Cameron
#7A America’s Sweethearts (Playoff) ..................................................................... Instrumental
#7B Transition back into rehab ............................................................................... Instrumental
#8 My I Want Song .......................... Britney, Moderator, Woman 1, Woman 2, Man 1, Man 2
#9 The Love of My Life ..................................................................................... Britney, K-Fed
#10 Dig Down Deep ........................... Britney, Moderator, Woman 1, Woman 2, Man 1, Man 2
#11 Push It Out .............................................................................................. Britney, Company
#12 Out of Control .................................................................................. Britney, Paris, Lindsay
#12A Out of Control (Reprise #1) ...................................................................................... Britney
#12B Out of Control (Underscore) ............................................................................ Instrumental
#12C Out of Control (Reprise #2) ......... Britney, Moderator, Woman 1, Woman 2, Man 1, Man 2
#12D Promises Intro (Reprise) ................................................................................. Instrumental
#13 Reprises ...................................... Britney, Moderator, Woman 1, Woman 2, Man 1, Man 2
#14 Dream Ballet ............................................ Moderator, Woman 1, Woman 2, Man 1, Man 2
#15 Cross That Line ...................................................................................... Britney, Moderator
#16 Here I’ll Be .................................. Britney, Moderator, Woman 1, Woman 2, Man 1, Man 2
#17 The Finale ................................... Britney, Moderator, Woman 1, Woman 2, Man 1, Man 2
#18 Bows ............................................................................................................... Instrumental
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 1

PRE-SHOW

VFX: #1-LOGO

VFX: #2-BLACK

SCENE 1
A dark stage.

SFX: #1-NEEDLE ON RECORD

#1: SOME SORT OF OVERTURE

VFX: #3-SOME SORT OF OVERTURE

BRITNEY addresses the audience.
BRITNEY (V.O.)
It's the overture. Are you ready? Are your cell phones really off? If not, I'm gonna pull a Patti LuPone on
your sorry butts! Welcome to Becoming Britney. Turn to your neighbor and say hello. If they're cute you
can flirt a little. Can you feel the groove? We wanna get your butts to move. Are the actor's ready?
(singing)
ARE THE ACTORS READY
ARE YOU READY?
(spoken)
Seriously, are the actors ready?
ENSEMBLE (FROM BACKSTAGE)
Ready Britney!
BRITNEY (V.O.)
The actors are ready. Four-three-two-one.

SFX: #2-BOOM

VFX: #4-BLACK
BRITNEY (CONT'D)
Once upon a time, y'all.
#2: THE OPENING NUMBER

VFX: #5-BRAIN LIGHTNING

Lights come up. The MODERATOR, MAN 1, MAN 2, WOMAN 1 and
WOMAN 2 lounge in various poses. Time to make the donuts. The
bespectacled Moderator also carries a clipboard and pen, checking off
tasks as they go.
WOMAN 1
THIS IS THE OPENING NUMBER
MAN 2
THIS IS THE START OF THE SHOW
WOMAN 2
HERE WE FIND OUT WHAT WE'RE IN FOR
MAN 1
HERE WE FIND OUT WHAT WE NEED TO KNOW
p. 2 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

MODERATOR
WE'RE HERE IN HER HEAD TO PROTECT HER
A SHOWTUNE IS LIKE A GOOD FRIEND AND
ALL
IT'S A BEAUTIFUL DAY IN MUSICAL LAND!
The characters are moving and sweeping across the stage, interacting
with each other, busily on their way to nowhere.
MODERATOR
Are we keeping her happy?
WOMAN 2
She feels a little off today.
MODERATOR
I feel it too. Let's keep singing!
ALL
THIS IS THE OPENING NUMBER
Woman 2 accidentally steps on the foot of Man 1.
MAN 1
Ouch!
WOMAN 2
Sorry!
ALL
THIS IS THE START OF THE SHOW
Man 2 and Woman 1 accidentally plow into each other.
WOMAN 1
Oops!
MAN 1
Sorry!
ALL
HERE WE FIND OUT WHAT WE'RE IN FOR
Man 2 and Woman 1 accidentally plow into each other again.
MODERATOR
Just a hiccup!
ALL
HERE WE LAY OUT WHAT WE NEED TO KNOW

WE'RE HERE IN HER HEAD TO DISTRACT HER

WE DAZZLE BECAUSE WE CAN
WOMAN 1
(arriving late for a pose)
Damn!
ALL
AND
Woman 2 accidentally pokes Man 1 in the eye.
MAN 1
Ow!
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 3

ALL
IT'S STILL A GREAT DAY IN MUSI–

SFX: #3-MACHINE DOWN AND BACK UP

A great machine winds down. The lights flash. The actors slowly slump,
losing power. Then, the machine revs back up, and the ensemble is back
to full energy.
ALL (CONT'D)
CAL LAND
They dance without really thinking about it, the same movements they've
performed a million times before.
MAN 1
I'm scared!
WOMAN 2
This feels different.
WOMAN 1
(to Woman 2)
She took some Ambien and now I can't think straight.
(to Man 1)
Seriously, can't we make her lay off that stuff?
MAN 1
All that caffeine she drinks isn't doing any good either. I mean, look how affects him!
(indicates Man 2)
Man 2 performs a maniacally fast time step and sings a Capella at
double speed.
MAN 2
THIS IS THE OPENING NUMBER
THIS IS THE START OF THE SHOW
(spoken)
Red Bull!
Silence. Everyone stares at him for a moment and then continue as if
nothing has happened. They become elegant in their movement.
ALL
ABSURD? OF COURSE!
WE SING 'TIL HOARSE
OUR DEDICATION ON DISPLAY
WE GO FOR BROKE
WE PRANCE, WE JOKE
MAN 1
(a cheesy, rapid-fire stand-up comic)
Paris and Lindsay walk into a salon. I mean Cameron Diaz and her body guard... Wait!
MODERATOR
(looking up, concerned)
What is going on out there?
MAN 1
I could do it yesterday!
ALL
WE HOPE THAT SHE'S OH-KAY
p. 4 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

ALL (CONT’D)
THIS IS THE OPENING NUMBER
THIS IS THE START OF THE SHOW
NOW WE'RE NOT SURE WHAT WE'RE IN FOR
NOW THERE'S NOT MUCH THAT
WE KNOW WE KNOW

MAYBE WE FAILED TO PERSUADE HER

MAYBE WE'RE IN A BIG JAM, MA'AM
SOMETHING'S GONE WRONG
IN MUSICAL
All hold the note except the Moderator, who steps forward and speaks to
everyone, including the audience. She finally intuits the source of
Britney’s distress in the outside world, and now understands what is
necessary. She takes control.
MODERATOR
It's worse than I thought. Gather your forces. We need to bring her in. Bring her in!

SFX: #4-WHOOSHING

VFX: #6-TUNNEL
The lights flash. A chaotic maelstrom.
They sing her name, distant angelic voices. Beckoning.
ALL
BRITNEY
BRITNEY
BRITNEY

VFX: #7-BLACK
#3: PROMISES

VFX: #8-PROMISES SIGN 1

The lights come up.
Man 1, Man 2, Woman 1 and Woman 2 stand in a wide semi-circle, each
in front of a chair. They are trendy and very serious. They hold hands.
Britney sits in the center chair, frozen as if not there at all. Her hoodie is
pulled tight, her head bowed so we can't see her face. The Moderator
stands nearby, near a chair of her own.
They sing: beautiful and somber.
(singing)
ONE SMALL STEP
NO REGRET
I ACCEPT WHAT IS RIGHTFULLY MINE
DAYS ARE LOST
DOESN'T ANYBODY CARE?
THERE'S NO SENSE OF TIME
THE PAST IS PAST, OF THAT I AM AWARE

A
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 5

They each hold a hand to their ear to hear their own part.
ALL (CONT’D)
WARE
The Moderator steps forward. She is a walking self-help book. A bad
one.
MODERATOR
Welcome to group. Whether it was court-ordered or not, thank you for coming. Here at "Promises,
Promises" we are your "personal PR Fixery and Spirit Spa", and we cater to the exceptionally beautiful -
and the moderately talented. As you enter this program, safe from the prying eyes of the public and the
press, your task is to ask yourself: Who am I? Who was I? Who do I hope to be? And how do I get the
National Enquirer off my ass? Part one. Affirmation. Begin.
MAN 2
YOU HAVE THE SENSE TO KNOW JUST WHO YOU ARE
WOMAN 2
YOU HAVE THE DRIVE TO BE ALL YOU'LL BE
MAN 2
IT DOESN'T MATTER YOU HAVEN'T COME FAR
WOMAN 1
GOD, THESE EXTENSIONS LOOK AWESOME ON ME!
ALL
PROMISES, PROMISES
THEY'RE EMPTY, INCOMPLETE
PROMISES, PROMISES
A TIME TO BE DISCREET
PROMISES, PROMISES
I SPEAK THIS EMPTY VOW
LEAVE YOUR MESSAGE AT THE TONE
MAN 1 & MAN 2
Beep!
ALL
'CAUSE I'M IN REHAB NOW
MAN 1
I accept that I'm a pill-popping punk.
WOMAN 2
I'm bulimic, but now I'm throwing up a red flag.
WOMAN 1
I know I need to stop cutting my arms. And my legs. And my feet.
MAN 2
OK, I admit it
(singing)
I CALLED HIM A FAG.
WOMEN
I PROMISE
MEN
I PROMISE
WOMEN
I PROMISE
p. 6 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

MEN
I PROMISE
ALL
I PROMISE
Woman 2 adds a big unnecessary riff. Everyone turns to look at her,
mildly annoyed.
WOMAN 2
(defensive)
What?!
A spot comes up on Britney, still slumped in her chair.
MODERATOR
We have a new member today, a young lady who needs no introduction. She has had a "chaotic" week,
wouldn't you say? Some might even say “toxic” and I think it is here you'll discover “you're not a girl, not
yet a woman”. It's clear that it's time for you to regroup, to grow, to shed your
(singing)
OUTRAGEOUS
(spoken)
image. Please come forward and let us light your path.
(singing)
WE DO NOT JUDGE, ARE ACCEPTING AND LOVING
DON'T BE AFRAID TO RELEASE YOUR INNER SELF
YOUR EGO-DRIVEN WAYS
AND SHOW US WHO YOU REALLY ARE
Britney looks up, as if realizing for the first time they are paying attention
to her. She nervously walks to center and finally slides her hood down to
reveal a freshly-shorn head. They all gasp!
MAN 1
Oh my God.
MAN 2
What were you thinking?
WOMAN 1
That's what she was doing?
WOMAN 2
No wonder the opening number sucked!
MODERATOR
Hush! We're trying to heal her, remember?
(to Britney)
What they meant to say was: tell us how you got here.
BRITNEY
I got here in my Mercedes. I guess. I'm really not sure where I am.
(suspicious)
Is this some sort of rehab?
MODERATOR
Something like that.
BRITNEY
Well thanks, but I'm doing fine.
She starts to walk away.
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 7

MAN 1
(darkly, standing)
Are you? Really?
Britney stops in her tracks and turns slowly back to Man 1.
BRITNEY
I don't need to be here.
Man 1 and Britney cross slowly toward each other.
MAN 1
But you do.
BRITNEY
But I don't.
MAN 1
I know you. I know this badass self-assurance, this mask. I know what it's like to be at the top of the party
scene, when actually you're scraping rock bottom. Take a little something here and there, and then
suddenly, a little something turns into a little too much.
BRITNEY
(softening, a little)
I hate when that happens.
MAN 1
It sucks. And we end up looking bizarre, like speaking in a fake British accent in a drug store in the middle
of the night with the paparazzi in tow.
BRITNEY
(hardening again)
Your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying.
MAN 1
We've worked together for years to perfect all this
(indicates her body, head to toe)
And it's effective, right? It gets easier and easier and block out the world, doesn't it?
BRITNEY
(in a fake British accent)
Indubitably.
MAN 1
We don't have to do that here. You can trust here. You're safe here with us because we are you.
MODERATOR
(a warning)
Man 1. Careful. We have to roll it out gently. She doesn't understand yet.
BRITNEY
(to Man 1)
You explain it to me.
MODERATOR
(to Man 1)
Just follow the plan.
MAN 1
(to Britney)
You think you're edgy? I'm edgy too. I sign my name with just a semicolon. I think names are overrated?
BRITNEY
I think hair is overrated.
p. 8 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

MAN 1
Let us help you.
BRITNEY
What do you mean, "help" me?
MODERATOR
Man 1...
MAN 1
(correcting her)
Semicolon.
MODERATOR
Semicolon… needs to let someone else talk now.
MAN 1
(to Britney)
You are everything.
BRITNEY
Am I?
MAN 1
Literally.
He returns to his chair and sits.
MODERATOR
Woman 1?
WOMAN 1
No.
MODERATOR
Now.
WOMAN 1
(indicating Man 2 and Woman 1)
Let them go first.
MODERATOR
(to Britney)
She's that tough-to-get-at part of ourselves that others see as hard and repellent and really rude and
gross. But actually she has a soft gooey center.
WOMAN 1
What?!
MODERATOR
You're gooey.
WOMAN 1
(coming forward, to the Moderator)
I am not gooey! And I'm not rude. Or hard.
(to Britney)
People don't understand, right?
BRITNEY
Totally. People don't get me.
WOMAN 1
They don't get it. We're untamed! Wild! Adventurous!
(then, an admission)
I'm a bit of a cutter.
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 9

MAN 2
(out of the side of his mouth)
Awkward.
BRITNEY
(mildly horrified)
Why?
WOMAN 1
(points to her own head)
Lots of stuff going on in there. Gotta find ways to let it out.
BRITNEY
I thought about cutting but I never did it.
WOMAN 1
I know. I do it for you, so you don't have to.
BRITNEY
Does it help?
WOMAN 1
Not really.
BRITNEY
But if it doesn't help you should stop.
WOMAN 1
(intensely)
I know. It should stop.
BRITNEY
I like you.
MODERATOR
Interesting.
WOMAN 2
(calling from her seat)
Come on! Is it my turn now? I want to get in there and get my hands dirty!
Woman 1 returns to her chair and sits.
MODERATOR
(to Woman 2 without looking at her)
If you are calm you may now approach.
Woman 2 squeaks with delight and jumps to her feet.
(to Britney)
Buckle up.
Woman 2 arrives and squeezes between Britney and the Moderator.
WOMAN 2
(waving at Britney, right in her face)
Hi! How are you?
BRITNEY
(flinching from the waves)
A little confused.
WOMAN 2
Really? Me too! I can't figure out any of it. I'm here for bulimia.
BRITNEY
I tried that once!
p. 10 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

WOMAN 2
I know! Me too! Just once.
BRITNEY
Uh-huh. Once. It was gross.
WOMAN 2
Yeah, gross huh?
BRITNEY
Yeah. Ew. Not for me.
WOMAN 2
Me neither!
BRITNEY
(to Moderator)
She's a little scary.
WOMAN 2
You're right! I'm scary!
MODERATOR
(indicating Woman 2)
She's a pleaser.
WOMAN 2
Right again. I love to please!
MODERATOR
(to Britney)
Sound familiar?
WOMAN 2
(still chattering to Britney)
We're just the same. We're, like, on the same track, you know? And now you're here, so duh, obviously I
want to help you.
BRITNEY
(shaking her head)
Still don't get it.
WOMAN 2
Let me help let me help let me help!
Britney looks to The Moderator for an explanation.
MODERATOR
Just say "yes".
BRITNEY
(to Woman 2 without a beat)
Yes.
WOMAN 2
(very pleased)
And yes from me too, Madame!
She grabs Britney's hand and shakes it vigorously.
Woman 2 to your rescue. I think you'll be very happy with my work.
Woman 2 crosses to Man 2. She takes his hand and pulls him to his feet.
MODERATOR
Your turn.
(nudging him downstage)
Be nice and don't say anything inappropriate.
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 11

WOMAN 1
(to Man 2)
Yeah, keep a lid on it.
Man 2 approaches Britney.
MODERATOR
(introducing him)
Man 2.
MAN 2
(to Britney)
Hi.
BRITNEY
Hi.
MAN 2
What should I say?
BRITNEY
I don't know.
MAN 2
I want to help too, but we have to watch what we say.
BRITNEY
OK.
MAN 2
I sometimes say the wrong thing.
BRITNEY
Story of my life!
MAN 2
I'm honest, that's all. Like, if you have a misshapen head I'm gonna tell you.
Britney, Man 1, Woman 1 and Woman 2 all touch their heads.
ALL (EXCEPT MODERATOR & MAN 2)
Ouch.
MAN 2
That's honest, right?
BRITNEY
Pretty honest.
MAN 2
(to the Moderator)
Did I do it again?
(to Britney)
I'm trying to control it. I'm trying to be your restraint. They're big on that here.
BRITNEY
How's that going?
MODERATOR
(to Man 2)
You could be better.
MAN 2
Yep.
Man 2 hangs his head in shame and returns to his chair, and sits.
p. 12 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

MODERATOR
(to Britney)
We could all learn some restraint, couldn't we?
BRITNEY
You sound just like Mama. That's all I had when I was a kid. Restraint and work.
MODERATOR
So tell us, at last. Why are you here? What about the, ummm...
She trails off as she points to Britney's bald head, drawing circles around
it in the air.
BRITNEY
(pointing to her head, dismissive)
This? Well, I was on a caffeine/sugar high... and my head itched a little... and that was annoying... and
there was a beauty salon right there and...
MODERATOR
(putting her index finger over Britney's mouth, stopping her)
In song.
BRITNEY
(muffled, through the finger)
What?
MODERATOR
Tell us in song. That's what we do here. Open your inner spirit to us and communicate through music and
verse.
BRITNEY
(suddenly excited, then, à la Baby June)
Mr. Conductor if you please!
*Note: Alternative dialog below if using performance tracks instead of a
band.
*MODERATOR
Sorry, no conductor. No band, so no conductor. We have a stage manager. He's there.
*She indicates in the direction of the STAGE MANAGER (JERRY).
His name is Jerry.
*BRITNEY
(wary)
Jerry?
*STAGE MANAGER
Yes?
*MODERATOR
(to Britney)
You are in control.
*BRITNEY
(excited again)
Mr. Jerry, if you please!
End of alternate dialogue.
An enthusiastic Britney pulls on a wig. A lip synced dance number.
#4: …MILLIONAIRE WHORE

SFX: #5-MILLIONAIRE WHORE

VFX: #9-PINK AND PURPLE BLUR

BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 13

BRITNEY
What’s up y'all?
I like talkin' like this
I can say anything I want and you'd still want me

VFX: #10-PETER PIPER

Peter piper picked a peck of pickled peppers

VFX: #11-PINK AND PURPLE BLUR

Mmm.

VFX: #12-WOODCHUCK
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

VFX: #13-PINK AND PURPLE BLUR

Check it out!
(singing)
ONCE UPON A TIME, I WAS A SOUTHERN GIRL
A SWEET YOUNG THING, THAT'S RIGHT
I LIKED TO TURN AND TWIRL
I WORE A CLEAN, BUTTONED-UP BLOUSE
I HAD A DATE WITH MICKEY MOUSE

AS THE TIME GOES BY IT STARTS TO SEEM THAT YOU

WANT ME TO LOOSEN UP PERHAPS A BUTTON OR TWO
I DIDN'T THINK IT'D BE SUCH A SIN
AND MAYBE I SHOULD SHOW SOME SKIN

I MADE PEOPLE EVERYWHERE

MADE THEM STOP AND STARE
LITTLE GIRLS THEY WANNA BE LIKE ME
I SING OOPS I DID IT AGAIN,
FROM GIRL NEXT DOOR TO MILLIONAIRE WHORE

IT STARTS TO LOOK LIKE I, AM GROWING UP A BIT

I HAVE A LOT TO SHOW
UH-OH, MY BRAS DON'T FIT
THE BOYS AND MEN ALL START TO GROAN
WHEN I'M ON THE FRONT OF ROLLING STONE
Britney strikes a magazine cover pose.
I MADE PEOPLE EVERYWHERE
MADE THEM STOP AND STARE
BOYS AND GIRLS THEY ALL LOOK UP TO ME
I SING HIT ME BABY ONE MORE TIME,
FROM GIRL NEXT DOOR TO MILLIONAIRE WHORE

THERE WAS A TIME WHEN I WAS YOUNG AND FREE

p. 14 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

BRITNEY (CONT’D)
A FRESH NEW FACE OF VIRGINITY
MY TONGUE WAS SWEET
I WAS DISCREET
The dancers begin to lip sync as well.
ALL
Now there's just no turning back
Don’t matter if you start to crack
I don't care you feelin' sick
Keep pumpin' as you turn your trick
From coast to coast we watch you climb
Make money and don't waste my time
There is no doubt
I’ll pimp you out
Sex sells more
You dirty whore!
Britney quickly kisses each of her female dancers on the mouth.
BRITNEY
PEOPLE EVERYWHERE
MADE THEM STOP AND STARE
HEY BRITNEY WON'T YA LOOK AT ME
I’M RISING STRAIGHT UP TO THE TOP
FROM GIRL NEXT DOOR TO MILLIONAIRE WHORE!
GIRL NEXT DOOR TO MILLIONAIRE WHORE!
GIRL NEXT DOOR TO MILLIONAIRE WHORE!
The others drop back into their chairs, and Britney's hair is gone again.

VFX: #14-PROMISES SIGN 2

MAN 2
(appalled)
She was lip syncing!
BRITNEY
Of course.
WOMAN 1
We were all lip syncing.
BRITNEY
My fans love it.
MAN 1
Are you sure they even realize it?
BRITNEY
I don't know. Does that really matter?
WOMAN 2
(to Britney)
Well, it is sorta cheating. Lip syncing equals cheating.
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 15

MODERATOR
(to Britney)
It's true. That is cheating, honey. Here, you need to actually sing in front of people.
BRITNEY
(highly amused)
But I can't sing!
MODERATOR
Sure you can.
BRITNEY
No. I can't. Not anymore.
MODERATOR
We can help with that. Sing a scale.
Britney sings an entirely mediocre scale in her trademark nasal moan.
Good! A starting point. Man 1 can you assist?
Man 1 produces a festive magic wand and positions himself in a firm
stance. He fiddles with the wand's settings.
Man 1 is a magician at this.
(to Man 1)
Ready?
MAN 1
(to the Moderator, still fiddling with the wand)
Just a little adjustment. OK, I'm ready.
MODERATOR
Try again, Britney.
Britney starts to sing her mediocre scale again. As she does it, Man 1
waves the wand and then points it directly at Britney, flinging magic at
her.

SFX: #6-MAGIC WAND TINKLING

Britney straightens up and undergoes a vocal metamorphoses. She
sings notes that burble out of her, which first sound like her normal pop
voice, and then transform into a legit-sounding scale. She is amazed!
The others clap their approval.
Woman 1 toots a party horn.
BRITNEY
Whoa!
MODERATOR
Wonderful! Now you're ready to join us.
BRITNEY
But why do y'all keep singin'?
MAN 1
Because this is a musical.
MODERATOR
(counting off, clapping on each count)
Five-six-seven-eight!
As the Moderator counts off, the others scrabble forward, freezing on
"eight".
ALL (EXCEPT BRITNEY)
Your musical!
p. 16 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

Jazz hands!
BRITNEY
(finding this idea completely ridiculous, or does she?)
Musical? What do you mean?
Britney pushes out from the group and paces about in a laughing rant.
The others fade back to their chairs and eventually sit.
Broadway? For me? I already did that. That's kid stuff. You think my fans will let me do that?
(sarcastic defensiveness, secretly wants this)
Sure, I'll be Eponine in Les Mis! I'll be Sally Bowles in Cabaret. I'll be a Jellicle cat! I'll dance and sing and
wear leg warmers!
MODERATOR
OK, we hit a nerve! But let's not overwhelm her right away. Britney, since you're new here, you're
unfamiliar with what we do. Understanding will come.
(to the audience)
And songs will pop up in the correct places, just like they're supposed to. And they will hopefully advance
the story and flow in and out of scenes logically.
(to Britney)
No need to rush. The first important lesson for you to learn is this.
WOMAN 1
(to Man 2)
Here it comes.
MODERATOR
(simple certainty)
Inch by inch, life's a cinch. Yard by yard, pretty hard.
MAN 2
(cringing)
Kill me now.
WOMAN 1
(teasing Man 2)
You can't die. Figments of imagination can't die.
MAN 2
(teasing back)
Your mama's a figment!
WOMAN 1
You're a figment!
MAN 2
Figment says what?
WOMAN 1
Figment better step off!
MODERATOR
(to Woman 1 and Man 2)
Hey! We're all figments! I'm warning you.
Woman 1 mimes pulling a zipper across her mouth, turning a key and
then tossing the key over her shoulder.
(gently, as if to a child)
Stop it!
BRITNEY
Ha! Mama used to say that all the time.
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 17

BRITNEY (CONT’D)
(as Mama, sharp and loud)
"Stop it!"
(as herself again)
It was, like, her favorite thing to say.
MODERATOR
(to the audience)
And there's our segue.
(to Britney)
Let's talk about mom. That OK?
BRITNEY
(nonchalant)
I don't care.
MODERATOR
Do you feel you were… used?
BRITNEY
Sure.
MODERATOR
Molded into a star to satisfy her greed?
BRITNEY
Uh-huh.
MODERATOR
Stripped of your innocence instead of protected?
BRITNEY
Yep!
MODERATOR
Would you like to talk about it?
BRITNEY
(shrugging)
I guess.
(remembers)
Oh! When I got my first big paycheck the first thing they did was put in a pool!
(out and up, suddenly in dreamy thought with the memory)
I never saw my dog again.
MODERATOR
Ah-ha.
(switching gears)
Moving forward. Let's try a little role-playing exercise.
(to an audience member)
This is where I shine!
(to the actors)
Who wants to help me teach Britney by example?
Woman 2 throws her hand in the air and vibrates. She is the only
volunteer, as usual. The Moderator searches the others for interest,
torturing Woman 2 for a few moments by ignoring her. She finally
acknowledges Woman 2.
Woman 2? Are you up for it?
Woman 2 squeaks and jumps to her feet in front of her chair.
Over here. Next to me.
p. 18 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

Woman 2 bounces over and stops next to the Moderator. She continues
to pulse.
MODERATOR (CONT'D)
Ready?
Woman 2 nods. The Moderator touches Woman 2's shoulders to stop
the bouncing.
(bright and perky)
Hi Mom!
WOMAN 2
(like a 50’s TV mother)
Hello dear. Would you like a cookie? And my love?
MODERATOR
Gee!
They hug in one simultaneous move, cheek-to-cheek, facing out and
holding hands in a freeze. Man 2 strikes a small bell to make a "ding."
(to Britney)
See? Simple, clean, perfect. Thank you, Woman 2.
The Moderator has trouble tearing away from her. They are still holding
hands. Woman 2 hangs on in desperation. It's a silent wrestling match
for a moment. The Moderator finally breaks free. Woman 2 concedes
defeat and returns to her seat, happy as a clam.
(to Britney)
Now you stand right over here next to me. We'll improvise a little scenario and try to illustrate your
relationship with your mom, OK? Don't worry, this is a completely safe and supportive place.
They stand closely, facing each other.
Concentrate.
BRITNEY
Oh kee doh kee.
Without pauses, they unintentionally create their version of a "Who's on
First" sketch.
MODERATOR
You are your mother and I'm you.
BRITNEY
You're me?
MODERATOR
Yes.
BRITNEY
And who am I?
MODERATOR
Your mother.
BRITNEY
Mama?
MODERATOR
Yes.
BRITNEY
(spinning around to look behind her)
Where?
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 19

MODERATOR
You are her.
BRITNEY
And you?
MODERATOR
I'm you.
BRITNEY
You're Hugh?
MODERATOR
No I am you! And you play your mother.
BRITNEY
Oh, I wasn't allowed to play.
Back on track, they return to a normal conversational rhythm.
MODERATOR
Just pretend with me. Yes?
BRITNEY
Yes.
MODERATOR
(kneeling, facing out)
Mama I am tired and overwhelmed.
Britney suddenly becomes Mama, angry and mean one moment, and
then treacly sweet the next. She stands behind the kneeling Moderator,
also facing out, and adjusts her hair and checks her teeth, as if looking
out into a mirror.
BRITNEY
(as mean Mama)
Stop it! Just stop yer belly-achin'. You'll have plenty of time to relax when we get famous.
(suddenly sweet Mama)
Most little girls would give up everything to be a star. I know I would.
(mean)
Get your hands off that buttercream pie!
MODERATOR
(playing along)
Mother, you are an enabler and you are suffocating me with your own selfish needs!
BRITNEY
Put down that fried chicken!
(gasps)
Is that gravy on your chin!?
MODERATOR
(back to herself)
Britney honey, are you hungry? Do we need to stop for lunch?
BRITNEY
No. Mama was a good cook, that's all. I like rememberin' that. Even though I never got to eat much of that
stuff.
MODERATOR
Let's try this from a different angle. You play yourself and I'll play your mother, OK?
The Moderator exits. Britney is confused.
p. 20 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

MAN 1
Go ahead and start. She'll be right back.
BRITNEY
What do I do?
WOMAN 1
Maybe the wig will help.
MAN 1
Of course! The wig!
Man 1 pulls out a pig-tailed blonde wig and holds it aloft like a great
treasure.
WOMAN 2
The wig!
WOMAN 1
The wig!
MAN 1
The wig!
MAN 2
The wig!
Man 1 holds it out to Britney.
BRITNEY
That's not what my hair looked like as a kid.
Without missing a beat, Man 1 holds up an 8 x 10 of a dorky looking
Britney with hair exactly like the wig.
(also without missing a beat)
That is what my hair looked like as a kid!
MAN 1
Kneel down.
Britney warily drops to her knees, facing out.
WOMAN 1
(putting the wig on her, reassuring)
Remembering can't hurt you.
MAN 1
(prompting her)
"Mama I am tired and overwhelmed".
Lights fade. A spot stays on Britney.
*NOTE: The following dialog was partially based on the height of the
Moderator in the original production, who was very tall. If there's a
physical attribute you can point out in your Moderator you could replace
"tall" with that attribute.
BRITNEY
Oh Mama. How can I remember without making you look bad? I was just a little girl. And you were so tall.
Gosh you were tall.
(calling back over her shoulder to the Moderator, who is still
offstage)
Taller than I remember!
MODERATOR
(from backstage)
Concentrate!
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 21

BRITNEY
(back to the audience)
Anyhoo. Mama, I was scared I couldn't do everything right. Maybe you were scared too. I tried to make
y'all proud. I tried to make y'all money. But I was so worn out. Sometimes I just wanted to stop. And
sometimes I got angry too.
(small and vulnerable)
Mama I'm tired and overwhelmed.
Lights change suddenly. MAMA enters, erupting.
#5: STOP IT!

VFX: #15-ABSTRACT FIRE

MAMA
STOP IT! JUST STOP IT NOW AND PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER
I DIDN'T RAISE MY LITTLE STAR TO WHINE AND WHEEZE AND WIMPER
Mama pulls Britney to her feet, practically enveloping her from behind
and points out.
SEE THAT GIRL? YOU TAKE HER DOWN
YOU'RE NOTHING WITHOUT THAT GOLDEN CROWN
SO DO IT AGAIN, AND DO IT RIGHT
AND TWEEZE AND TWIRL AND FIGHT

VFX: #16-BLUE AND WHITE LIGHTS

They sink to the floor, Mama cradling Britney in front of her.
JUST REMEMBER, MAMA LOVES YOU, IT'S FOR YOUR OWN GOOD
SO SMILE AND SING LIKE I KNOW YOU SHOULD
Britney reaches out to pick something up.

VFX: #17-ABSTRACT FIRE

Mama slaps Britney hand, then stands and pulls Britney to her feet as
well, singing into her face.
DON'T TOUCH THAT! IT'S FULL OF FAT AND CELEBRITIES ARE THIN
WE CANNOT HAVE YOU RUNNIN' 'ROUND WITH A GRODY DOUBLE CHIN

SO PUT IT DOWN, RESIST THE URGE

DON'T BINGE, BUT IT'S OK TO PURGE

REMEMBER WHAT WE ALWAYS SAY TO KEEP OUR DESIRE FOR FOOD AWAY
Mama puts her arms around Britney from behind and sways with her,
then turns Britney toward her, takes her face in her hands and leans in
very, very close.
(spoken, menacing, through her teeth)
What do we always say?
BRITNEY
(reciting for Mama)
"Biscuits and gravy and buttercream pie will certainly give me my Granny's fat thighs."
MAMA
That's right, sweetie.
p. 22 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

MAMA (CONT’D)
(pointing out)
Now, see that little girl over there? Her name is Christine Ahgooler, or somethin' Mexican. She is nothing
but a dirty dirty whore, bless her heart. And you're better than that.
Mama is gone and Britney is back to the present.

VFX: #18-BLACK
BRITNEY
(yelling to the heavens)
Who's the dirty dirty whore now, Mama!?
The Moderator has put her glasses back on.
MODERATOR
Yes! Good work!
STAGE MANAGER (V.O.)
Little Britney, ladies and gentlemen.
A tiny smattering of unenthusiastic applause.

VFX: #19-MOVIE PROJECTOR

Off to the side, in silhouette, Woman 2 dances as LITTLE BRITNEY. We
see the outline of a huge bow on her head.
BRITNEY
Look at me go! Dance little Bit Bit! Dance! You're so young and innocent with your wide trustin' eyes and
your days-of-the-week underpants.
WOMAN 1
Oh, I love those!
BRITNEY
I know, aren't those so cute? And look! Here's my signature ending.
The silhouette of Little Britney performs movements as Britney narrates.
A "Droppity-Doo"… a saucy "Flippity Flip"… and a wink to the judges that says "You know I know, and I
know you know I know, and now you know it"!
The backlight fades on Woman 2. She removes the bow and returns to
her seat.

VFX: #20-BLACK
I didn't win that one. And Mama was mad. I really loved it. Singing, dancing. I don't know when the fun
stopped. I was in my own world. I knew what I was supposed to be doing at an early age. I wanted to be
on stage in the worst way. But Mama said that was beneath me. She said TV was the place to be. So I
guess I stopped dreaming of getting on the Broadway
(pronounced "Broad-WAY")
Mama said we had to go where the action was: Atlanta, Georgia! Seriously, for a little while it was a
buzzing hive of hot Disney action. Mama took me to an audition for The New Mickey Mouse Club. They
said I was too young, but the casting director introduced us to a real live agent and Mama said he could
make us a star! Older men are rich and hilarious. Life was suddenly grand again. I didn't think it could get
any better than rodeos and state fairs, but there I was in New York City!
#6: HERE WE ARE

VFX: #21-NYC
(à la Annie)
Ohhhh boy!!
Mama and THE AGENT coax Britney to come along.
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 23

THE AGENT
HERE WE ARE IN NYC
ENSEMBLE
IN NYC!
THE AGENT
IT'S THE PLACE TO BE
BRITNEY
Holy cow!
THE AGENT
TASTE THE PULSE AND FEEL THE BEAT
IGNORE THE HOMELESS ON THE STREET

EVERYONE HERE HAS SOME PLACE TO GO

GET OUT OF THEIR WAY AS THEY WEAVE TO AND FRO
SMELL POLLUTION IN THE AIR
JUST SNIFF
ENSEMBLE they stop in their tracks to sniff.
THE AGENT
AND YOU KNOW YOU'RE THERE
ALL (EXCEPT BRITNEY & MAMA)
THANK GOD WE'RE IN NYC!
As New Yorkers busily crisscross the stage, a CONSTRUCTION
WORKER spots Britney.
CONSTRUCTION WORKER
(crossing behind Britney)
Nice ass!
BRITNEY
Thanks!
BRITNEY & MAMA
HERE WE ARE IN NYC
ENSEMBLE
OOH OOH OOH OOH OOH OOH OOH
BRITNEY & MAMA
IT'S THE PLACE TO BE
ENSEMBLE
TO BE
BRITNEY & MAMA
TASTE THE PULSE
ENSEMBLE
Ooh!
BRITNEY & MAMA
AND FEEL THE BEAT
ENSEMBLE
Ahh!
p. 24 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

BRITNEY & MAMA

IGNORE THE HOMELESS ON THE STREET
EVERYONE HERE HAS SOME PLACE TO GO
GET OUT OF THEIR WAY AS THEY
Mama accidentally bumps into a HOOKER who is passing by. A
cigarette hangs from the grizzled streetwalker’s mouth and she wears a
cardboard, hand-drawn sign around her neck that proclaims “$5.00”.
HOOKER
Watch it, Sugar!
BRITNEY & MAMA
SMELL POLLUTION IN THE AIR
JUST…
(sniff, and the coughing)
…THERE
THANK GOD WE'RE IN NYC!
While Mama is flirting with The Agent, Britney wanders over to the
Hooker, and taps her on the shoulder.
BRITNEY
I USED TO BE A GIRL WITH JUST A DREAM
NOW MY MAMA HAS A HELPFUL SCHEME
IF WE PLAY IT RIGHT I'LL GET SOME BREAKS
AND SHE'LL DO WHATEVER CRAP IT TAKES
HOOKER
I know whatcha mean!
(singing)
I WAS NEVER JUST A WHOLESOME QUEEN
I WAS SEXUAL AT AGE THIRTEEN
TURNING TRICKS AND SUCH WAS NOT SO BAD
I JUST WISH MY PIMP WAS NOT MY DAD
MR. HOBOJANGLES stumbles up.
MR. HOBOJANGLES
I NEVER THOUGHT I'D WIND UP EATING TRASH
BUT LIFE IS LIKE THAT
YOUR HOPES GET DASHED
HOOKER
AND EVEN THOUGH MY FUTURE IS FOREGONE
(belting with arms raised à la LuPone in Evita)
I DON'T REGRET IT
A man with a fan of oversized cash appears upstage.
WAIT! THERE'S MY JOHN!
The Hooker scampers off after her customer. Britney and Mr.
Hobojangles shrug. A fresh-faced young woman enters carrying a
suitcase and stops center. She is an impossibly optimistic STAR NOT
TO BE.
STAR NOT TO BE
HERE I AM IN NYC!
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 25

CONSTRUCTION WORKER
(interrupting and grabbing his crotch)
Yeah, here I am too, honey!
The young woman, horrified, turns and exits dejectedly.
MR. HOBOJANGLES
Follow me, kid. Do what I do.
Mr. Hobojangles leads Britney in a dance.

BRITNEY
Neat!
Boy!
Whee!
He ends the dance by slowly reaching out to touch her butt. Mama grabs
Britney by the hand, intervening just in time.
MAMA
Come on, Bit Bit! We got you a whole bunch of appointments. We're gonna be a star!
BRITNEY
Thanks, Mr. Hobojangles. Gotta go!
Three casting directors stand on chairs in a line upstage. Britney, facing
out, mimes knocking on one door at a time.
CASTING DIRECTOR 1 stands upstage of Britney.

VFX: #22-VERY IMPORTANT CASTING

HERE I AM!
ENSEMBLE
Slam!
Britney spins and ends up in front of the CASTING DIRECTOR 2.

VFX: #23-EVEN MORE IMPORTANT AGENCY INC

BRITNEY
HERE I AM!
ENSEMBLE
Slam!
One more time, Britney spins and ends up in front of CASTING
DIRECTOR 3.

VFX: #24-HERE COMES STARDOM LTD

Britney does a fully suggestive move and riffs.
BRITNEY
HERE I UHH...UH...UH...AM!
CASTING DIRECTOR 3
(smiles and holds out his hand to shake on it)
You're hired!
Britney moves center stage. Everyone from the street scene surrounds
her. A fan dance! A pinwheel! A kick line!

VFX: #25-NYC GOLD

p. 26 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

ALL
YOU'LL BE GREAT IN NYC!
MEN
SO GREAT IN NYC
ALL
YOU'LL TURN HEADS YOU'LL SEE
MEN
YOU’LL SEE
ALL
YOU ARE DESTINED TO SUCCEED
YOUR WEALTH WILL SATISFY YOUR GREED
YOU'RE HERE AND WE ALL AGREE
THANK GOD YOU'RE IN NYC!
C!
C!
Jazz hands and lots of heavy breathing. They made it through the
number!

VFX: #26-BLACK
#6A: HERE WE ARE - PLAYOFF

VFX: #27-NEWSPAPER HEADLINE 1

Newspaper headline: “BRITNEY TAKES OFF-BROADWAY BY
STORM!”

VFX: #28-NEWSPAPER HEADLINE 2

Newspaper headline: “BRITNEY ADVANCES ON STAR SEARCH”

VFX: #29-NEWSPAPER HEADLINE 3

Newspaper headline: “BRITNEY CRIES AS SHE LOSES STAR
SEARCH”

VFX: #30-NEWSPAPER HEADLINE 4

Newspaper headline: “A BRAND NEW MOUSEKETEER!”

VFX: #31-NEWSPAPER HEADLINE 5

Newspaper headline: “BRITNEY TOURS WITH *NSYNC”

VFX: #32-NEWSPAPER HEADLINE 6

Newspaper headline: “…BABY ONE MORE TIME A SMASH!!”
   
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 27

SCENE 2
A slightly sleazy HIGH SCHOOL BOYFRIEND steps forward.

VFX: #33-MOTEL SIGN

HIGH SCHOOL BOYFRIEND
Yeah, I was her first boyfriend. Did I have sex with Britney?
(thinking about how to answer, smirking)
A gentleman doesn't tell. I met her mama at the supermarket when I was seventeen. She kept asking if I
had a girlfriend and stuff. At first I thought maybe she was trying to pick me up. Turns out she was huntin'
for a boyfriend for Britney. She showed me a picture of Brit and I thought she was pretty cute, so I thought
"why not?" She was only fourteen, so she wasn't stuck up like the girls my age. She kinda let me be in
control. That was nice. She liked my bathtub. I had my own apartment
(almost under his breath)
in the basement of my parents’ house
(normal speech)
and I had this big tile bathtub, and she liked to take long baths. But that doesn't mean I was doin' her. I
spent three and a half years on that girl and she broke my heart when her mama broke up with me! I saw
her mama at a ball game and she told me "If anyone asks who you are, just say you're a friend of the
family." And that was it.
(a little misty with the memory)
It just wasn't the same gazing at the municipal water tower by myself.
(clicking back)
OK, I gotta go, interview over.
He walks away. Mama steps forward.

VFX: #34-GREEN BLUR

MAMA
Listen, I know that girl better than anyone on God's green earth. A mama always knows what's right for
her child. Some people just don't understand. Someone actually asked me if I felt guilty about "pimping"
my daughter out. I turned right to that person and stared right in their face and I said proudly "I have a
clean mind." We've been at this for a long time. People think Britney started dance lessons at only five
years old. Wrong! She started at two and a half. People are dumb.
Mama steps back. A plainspoken HOMETOWN LADY steps forward.

VFX: #35-CHARMING HOUSE

HOMETOWN LADY
We were all so proud of her. So proud. A hit song! And from our home town! She was just a regular little
girl walking around town, and then she was famous. That sort of made us famous too. We were tickled
pink. I mean, that family really needed her to save them from ruin. Her poor daddy kept trying all sorts of
schemes to keep the family going but nothing ever caught on. He had that gymnasium, and the
restaurant.
(whispers)
He even had that tax lien against him.
(back to normal volume)
He got his Ford Probe repossessed and sold at auction! They were desperate. And like an angel
swooping down from heaven, that beautiful child used her God-given talents to save her family. Amazing.
If it didn't happen to people I know, it would sound to these ears like a real live bible story. That girl was
their salvation. But that mama of hers really helped make it work, too. I mean, kids don't drive themselves
to interviews, agents and auditions. Parents do. That mama was determined. And she got results! When
Britney made that raunchy schoolgirl video, some people in town said she should be ashamed of herself,
that she's a dirty little
(tight lipped, not wanting to say it out loud)
Hmmm-hmmmmm. You know what I mean; I don't need to spell it out.
p. 28 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

HOMETOWN LADY (CONT’D)

(beat, then all at once, hushed and rushed, like a secret)
S-L-U-T there I said it.
(back to her normal delivery)
But those people couldn't be more wrong. We're very proud of that little girl. She's a good girl, and she's
from a good family.
The woman fades away. A flamboyant male PAGEANT CONSULTANT
steps forward.

VFX: #36-METAL STUDS

PAGEANT CONSULTANT
Pageants are the Super Bowl of the south. Period. Maybe that mother of hers was pushy, but as a
pageant consultant, I couldn't have asked for better raw material. She was undisciplined at the start, but
you could see the talent underneath. She competed with the best of them. She was driven. Little Miss
Baton Rouge, Peach festival, Alligator Festival. It didn't matter, she wanted to be a star! She knew what
she was doing.
(beat, while he considers whether or not to be honest)
But sometimes, just for a moment here and there, I could see a shy little girl just under all that fabulous
bluster. Sometimes, she just wanted to be quiet. She just wanted to be. Maybe we all pushed her too
hard.

VFX: #37-PROMISES SIGN 2

Britney is center stage, still holding sway telling her story. Everyone is
present except Man 2.
BRITNEY
And once that song hit, things were never the same. In a good way.
She sits.
MODERATOR
Britney has shared a story of struggle and success. That was very brave, I think we can all agree on that.
What are the lessons we can learn from Britney's tale, hmm? If we all use some elbow grease and do the
hard work and tear down those walls, the wisdom of the ages is right there in front of you.
They stare blankly at her.
Oh, come on! What are the lessons? How about: be careful what you wish for? Yes? The grass is always
greener on the other side?
WOMAN 2
Every cloud has a silver lining.
MODERATOR
Good!
Woman 2 starts slow and reaches a fever pitch as she spouts clichés.
She's on a roll, desperate for the Moderator's approval.
WOMAN 2
Don't hide your light under a bushel. A stitch in time saves nine. A penny saved is a penny earned. A
friend in need is a friend indeed. When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Mom always says don't
play ball in the house...
MODERATOR
(cutting her off)
Oh here's one! Britney, what does success mean to you?
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 29

BRITNEY
Well, to quote Wikipedia, the success of my music coupled with my controversial image had made me
one of the year's biggest stars. I started playing to sold-out stadiums and I started makin' crazy-ass
money. Things got so good I had to hire other people to help me enjoy it.
(to Woman 1)
It was so much easier than I expected. But…
She stands and slowly walks center.
(suddenly as melodramatic as a soap opera)
#6B: UNDERSCORE
Along with the perks of free fried chicken and Diet Pepsi came the ever growing media scrutiny. I could
no longer walk into a gas station bathroom without my shoes on. And the press, oy! Always goin' on about
my boobs, my burpin', my gum chewin' … did I cheat on Justin?
Britney exits.
WOMAN 2
She's mad.
MAN 1
(correcting her)
She's changing her costume.
MODERATOR
She'll be back soon.
WOMAN 1
Well, did she cheat or not?
MAN 1
No!
MODERATOR
It doesn't matter.
WOMAN 1
It's the kind of information that matters to me.
MAN 1
You're sound like the tagline for an entertainment news show.
WOMAN 1
Right. Curious.
MAN 1
Wrong. Nosy. Leave her alone.
MODERATOR
It can't hurt to talk about it. And since she's changing into a new costume I have to believe she wants to
talk about it.
WOMAN 2
I agree!
MAN 1
What's to talk about? There was pressure. Everyone was watching her. The paparazzi armies were
everywhere. Every night she'd turn on the TV and see...
Lights change.
#7: AMERICA'S SWEETHEARTS

VFX: #38-RED AND BLUE LEDS

p. 30 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

MAN 1 (CONT'D)
EXTRA! EXTRA! HAVEN'T YOU HEARD?
BRITNEY AND JUSTIN ARE THE LATEST WORD
THAT'S RIGHT J.T. AND BRIT
ARE JUST AS CUTE AS CAN BE
BRITNEY
I PROMISE NOT TO LOSE MY VIRGINITY
WOMAN 2
That's right, Britney's not giving it up to cutie patootie Justin Timberlake. In a recent interview, the pop
teen queen told us...
BRITNEY
I'm going to have sex when it feels right. But at the moment. I just don't feel ready, Justin is very
understanding.
WOMAN 1
ACCESS HOLLYWOOD, YOU HEARD IT HERE
THEY AIN'T GONNA DO IT, BRIT WAS PERFECTLY CLEAR
SHE'S WAITING FOR THE SPECIAL DAY
TIL SHE SAYS I DO
JUSTIN enters.
JUSTIN
FOR NOW I GUESS I'LL WAIT
WHILE MY BALLS TURN BLUE
MAN 1
Everyone's favorite NSYNCer is denied. Despite reports that Brit and the JT-man are sharing a nest in the
Hollywood Hills, our girl Britney remains steadfast in her commitment to the sacrament of marriage.
BRITNEY
I'm still
(making air quotes with her fingers)
"intact", and I intend to remain so. Least until some special fella slips a diamond on my finger.
ALL (EXCEPT BRITNEY & JUSTIN)
THEY ARE AMERICA'S SWEETHEARTS
AS CUTE AS CAN BE
AMERICA'S SWEETHEARTS
OUR BRIT AND J.T.
THEY'RE JUST LIKE KEN AND BARBIE
BUT MORE LIFE SIZE
AND JUSTIN WILL NOT GET INTO
OUR BRITNEY'S THIGHS
BRITNEY & JUSTIN
WE ARE HOT
BRITNEY
GORGEOUS
JUSTIN
AND TRENDY
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 31

BRITNEY & JUSTIN

AND WE ARE RICH, OVERFLOWING WITH RICHES
AND WE ARE LOVED, WE'RE LOVED BY YOU
BRITNEY
We're soulmates, I'm sure.
JUSTIN
Oh yeah, she's smokin' hot!
BRITNEY
We're gonna stay pure.
JUSTIN
Whether I like it or not.
BRITNEY
I'M GONNA HAVE SEX WHEN THE MOMENT FEELS RIGHT
JUSTIN
LUCKILY I’LL GET A LITTLE HEAD TONIGHT
WOMAN 2
Trouble in paradise for our pop-star duo? Conflicting reports of sources close to the cuddling slash
feuding couple tells us America's favorite highlighted kids might be on the rocks.
MODERATOR
They're great! Just the cutest couple ever!
MAN 1
JT is PO'd, yo!
WOMAN 2
ENTERTAINMENT TONIGHT HERE
REPORTING THE FEARS
DID JUSTIN DUMP HIS BOMBSHELL GAL
THE HOTTIE MISS SPEARS?
WE HEARD FROM THEIR PEEPS
ABOUT WHOM THEY REPRESENT
MAN 1 & MODERATOR
Justin and Britney are saying "No comment"!
ALL (EXCEPT BRITNEY & JUSTIN)
(GASP!)
UH-OH, AMERICA'S SWEETHEARTS
COULD THIS BE THE END?
WE HEAR THAT BRIT SLEPT
WITH OUR JUSTIN'S BEST FRIEND
IT LOOKS LIKE THOSE KIDS
WILL SAY GOODBYE, TOODLE-OO
THAT'S RIGHT FOLKS THEY'RE KAPUT
THEY ARE LIKE TOTALLY THROUGH
BRITNEY
We're gonna stay friends.
JUSTIN
She's a slutty slut spaz!
p. 32 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

BRITNEY
I still really love him.
JUSTIN
Hey look! It's Cameron Diaz!
CAMERON enters, all smiles and high energy. Justin goes to her and
they pose for the press. Everyone ignores Britney.
MODERATOR
(a rabid, waving fan)
CAMERON!!
MAN 1
Cameron, what's your new cause?
CAMERON
Butt dances for Africa!
ALL (EXCEPT BRITNEY, JUSTIN & CAMERON)
THEY ARE AMERICA'S SWEETHEARTS
PUT IT ON THE MARQUEE
AMERICA'S SWEETHEARTS
BUT SHE'S TALLER THAN HE
THEY'RE JUST LIKE KEN AND BARBIE
SO LET'S ALL GIVE A CHEER
THIS BOX OFFICE BABE WILL SAVE
THE BOY'S CAREER
ALL (EXCEPT BRITNEY) JUSTIN & CAMERON
THEY ARE AMERICA'S SWEETHEARTS WE ARE HOT
PUT IT ON THE MARQUEE GORGEOUS AND TRENDY
AMERICA'S SWEETHEARTS AND WE ARE RICH
BUT SHE'S TALLER THAN HE OVERFLOWING WITH RICHES
THEY'RE JUST LIKE KEN AND BARBIE AND WE ARE
SO LET'S ALL GIVE A CHEER LOVED
THIS BOX OFFICE BABE WILL SAVE WE'RE LOVED BY
THE BOY'S CAREER YOU!
Britney is lost in the press carnival. She jumps and waves, trying to be
noticed.
ALL JUSTIN & CAMERON BRITNEY
THEY ARE AMERICA'S SWEETHEARTS WE ARE HOT HEY, LOOK AT ME!
PUT IT ON THE MARQUEE GORGEOUS AND TRENDY
AMERICA'S SWEETHEARTS AND WE ARE RICH HEY, LOOK AT ME!
BUT SHE'S TALLER THAN HE OVERFLOWING WITH RICHES
THEY'RE JUST LIKE KEN AND BARBIE AND WE ARE I’M STANDING RIGHT
SO LET'S ALL GIVE A CHEER LOVED OVER HERE
THIS BOX OFFICE BABE WILL SAVE WE'RE LOVED BY I’M RIGHT
THE BOY'S CAREER YOU! HERE!
Britney pushes through and grabs the spotlight.
BRITNEY (CONT'D)
I don't need you anyway!
Blackout.
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 33

VFX: #39-BLACK
#7A: AMERICA'S SWEETHEARTS (PLAYOFF)

   
p. 34 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

SCENE 3

VFX: #40-LAS VEGAS SIGN

A female MINISTER steps forward with her HUSBAND at her side.
MINISTER
I run one of the oldest and most popular wedding chapels in all of Las Vegas. Despite what people may
think about these affairs, I am completely devoted to my clients. I am an ordained minister and I have
been involved in over eight hundred thousand weddings. I have never stopped loving what comes
through that door, so you can imagine how excited I was to see Britney and, uh...
(to her Husband)
Oh, what was his name?
The Husband opens his mouth to speak. She cuts him off.
(to the audience)
He had a real familiar name.
(to her Husband)
Like someone on TV.
The Husband opens his mouth to speak. She cuts him off.
(to the audience)
Anyway, he was pretty quiet. She barely let him get a word in edgewise.
(to her Husband)
Isn't that right honey?
The Husband opens his mouth to speak. She cuts him off.
(to the audience)
Now, I hear she was only married for about fifty hours, so, you know, that one didn't really take. But I still
believe they were meant for each other. They were childhood friends after all. They had history.
(to her Husband)
And isn't that the most important part of a relationship?
HUSBAND
(dryly)
No.
MINISTER
(Faux sweet)
Shut up.
#7B: TRANSITION BACK INTO REHAB

VFX: #41-PROMISES SIGN 2

Back at the support group, everyone in their usual seats. Man 1 is
tapping his foot in agitation.
MAN 1
(to the Moderator)
It's way past time!
MODERATOR
I know.
WOMAN 1
(bored)
Can't we just skip it?
MAN 1
What?! No!
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 35

WOMAN 1
(referring to an oblivious Britney)
She doesn't even know!
MODERATOR
It is getting late. Let's give her a little shove in that direction.
BRITNEY
Who's shoving me where now?
MAN 1
It's the time in the show where you need to sing your "I Want" song. We're dangerously deep into the
show and you haven't sung your "I Want" song!
(to the moderator)
This is what I would call a problem.
MODERATOR
I know. She should do it now.
WOMAN 2
I agree.
MAN 1
(relieved)
Right.
(to Britney)
You need to sing an "I Want" song.
(looking blankly at him)
You know, your Longing, your Hopes, your Dreams, all told in a beautifully melodic and emotionally
moving song?
WOMAN 1
And, it's a solo, so you won't be needing us.
Man 2 grabs Britney and moves her downstage.
MAN 2
(loudly, as if to someone with bad hearing)
Your "I Want" song.
BRITNEY
(pretending to understand)
I know what y'all are talking about!
Everyone watches on, hopeful and encouraging.
(to herself)
Come on, Bit Bit. Think!
#8: MY I WANT SONG
(singing)
THIS IS THE TIME IN MY STORY
WHERE I MANAGE TO BREAK IT ALL DOWN
IT IS HERE AT THIS POINT
WHERE I LEARN FROM MISTAKES
IT IS HERE IN THE STORY THAT YOU GET A TASTE OF ME
THIS IS THE TIME IN MY STORY
‘CAUSE IT'S ABOUT THE THIRD OR FOURTH SONG
MAN 2
Seventh, actually.
p. 36 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

MODERATOR
Shhhhh!
BRITNEY
IT IS HERE AT THIS PLACE
WHERE YOU START TO CRY
‘CAUSE MY BEAUTIFUL VOICE IS MELODIC AND FLIES

VFX: #42-PURPLE SMOKE

I NEED AN I WANT SONG
SOMETHING COOL AND LIGHT AND GAY
AN I WANT SONG
TO SEND MY TROUBLES ON THEIR WAY
‘CAUSE IN A MUSICAL YOU NEED A SONG
THAT MAKES YOU SWOON AND HUM ALONG
AN I WANT SONG
WHERE IS MY I WANT SONG?

I'M JUST LIKE THOSE OTHER HEROES

DREAMED A DREAM WITH BANNERS UNFURLED
LIKE ANNIE YEARNED FOR TOMORROW
AND ARIEL LONGED TO BE LEGGY
AND PART OF OUR WORLD

LIKE FRAULEIN MARIA WANTED ALL OF THOSE CHILDREN TO LOOK UP TO HER, NOW I SEE
THAT I'M MUCH LIKE THEM AND I NEED FIND
A WAY PORTRAY IN THREE MINUTES OR MORE
MY HARD KNOCK AND CONFIDENT AND
LOVERLY DESIRE TO BE FREE

I NEED AN I WANT SONG

TO DESCRIBE INTERNAL STRIFE
AN I WANT SONG
TO GIVE MY FANTASY A LIFE
I NEED A SONG THAT MAKES THE PUBLIC DANCE
AND GIVES ME MY DESERVING CHANCE
AN I WANT SONG
WHERE IS MY I WANT SONG?

AND THE MUSIC STARTS TO SOAR

AND YOU FEEL THE EXCITEMENT RISE
I AM BELTING WAY UP HIGH
WATCH ME BRIGHTEN UP MY EYES
BET YA HAVEN'T HEARD ME SING LIKE THIS
WELL THERE'S A LOT ABOUT ME YOU DON'T KNOW

I'LL FIND MY I WANT SONG

BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 37

BRITNEY (CONT’D)
I EXPLORE MY FEELINGS AND START TO GROW

I GUESS THE TIME IS HERE

YOU CAN FEEL THE MUSIC START TO PUMP
I TELL YOU ABOUT MY FEAR
HOW DO I GET OUT OF THIS SLUMP
AS THE CHORDS BEGIN TO CHANGE
I TELL YOU WHAT I'M TRYING TO BE

YOU MAY THINK IT STRANGE

A GIRL LIKE ME HAS ALL AND MORE
IT'S TIME I REARRANGE
PRIORITIES DOWN TO MY CORE
WATCH ME ARTICULATE
I FEEL SO ALIVE AND FREE
(spoken)
Dance break. Five-six-seven-eight.
Dance break.
Britney navigates a few fundamental dance moves and calls out the
names of them as she dances around the stage.
I SEE IT, I HEAR IT
I HEAR IT, I SEE IT
I SEE IT AND HEAR IT
I FOUND IT, MY SONG!

AS I DISCUSS MY FUTURE FATE

NOW AS THE MUSIC STARTS TO POUR
I WILL NO LONGER HESITATE
I'LL BE THE GIRL I'M LOOKING FOR
LOOKING FOR
The group materializes around Britney.
ALL (EXCEPT BRITNEY)
GIRL SHE'S LOOKING, LOOKING FOR!

THIS IS HER I WANT SONG

IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT WE SAY
BRITNEY
IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT YOU SAY
ALL (EXCEPT BRITNEY)
THIS IS HER I WANT SONG
WE'RE SECONDARY ANYWAY
BRITNEY
YES, YOU ARE
p. 38 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

ALL (EXCEPT BRITNEY) BRITNEY

‘CAUSE IN A MUSICAL YOU NEED A SONG YOU NEED A SONG
TO MAKE YOU SWOON AND HUM ALONG AHHHH
SEE IN A MUSICAL THERE COMES A TIME THERE COMES A TIME
TO DISTRACT YOUR MINDS WITH SIMPLE RHYMES SIMPLE RHYMES
AND IN THIS MUSICAL, WHICH IS ABOUT THAT GIRL
They point to Britney.
BRITNEY
THIS SONG'S MY PROMISE TO TAKE ON THE WORLD
I FOUND MY I WANT SONG
ARE YOU CRYING YET?
She looks around the audience and "spots" someone crying.
OKAY!
During the applause, Man 2 leaves the stage.

VFX: #43-PROMISES SIGN 2

MODERATOR
Well. That was a nice song. But you didn't really express what it is you want, did you?
BRITNEY
I thought I wanted an "I Want" song.
MODERATOR
You did. You do. It was lovely. But the song was supposed to outline your quest. Where does your story
go from here? What is your journey?
BRITNEY
I don't know.
MODERATOR
Why are you here?
BRITNEY
I'm not sure.
MODERATOR
Why did you shave your head?
BRITNEY
Who knows?
MODERATOR
You should know. At least you should know what you think about it now.
BRITNEY
Oh, I think it's funny.
WOMAN 1
(dryly, sarcastically)
Tee hee hee.
BRITNEY
(pointing to Woman 1)
See?
MODERATOR
We're here to help you. We need you to help us help you.
BRITNEY
How?
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 39

MODERATOR
Tell us how you ended up here.
BRITNEY
You keep saying that and I keep trying.
ALL (EXCEPT BRITNEY)
(in unison, standing)
Try again!
BRITNEY
(thinking about it, starting slowly)
Things weren't going too good with Kevin. And wouldn't you know it, babies are a lot of work!
MODERATOR
It might help to talk about your breakup. This recent challenge probably has more to do with your being
here than anything else.
BRITNEY
(dismissive)
Oh, I don't think so. K-Fed was a real prince, at least in the beginning.
Britney is center and looking out and up, lost in reverie, fondly
rememberin'. She doesn't turn back when she answers.
He knew exactly what to say. And he sang like an angel.
WOMAN 1
(aside to Man 2)
And he raps like a white boy.
BRITNEY
Y'all don't know him. He's… special.
MAN 1
We know.
BRITNEY
Real special. He wouldn't talk to me or even look at me for, like, the longest time. He was waitin'. And
then, when he finally made his move, he was...
(with a sigh)
lovely.
WOMAN 1
Uh-huh.
BRITNEY
(way too defensive and loud)
He was lovelyyyy!!

SFX: #7-RUMBLING
As Britney sustains the "ly" of "lovely", the rest of the cast shake as if in a
small earthquake. The temblor shakes them right offstage, leaving
Britney alone. She finishes the cry at the moment the rumbling stops and
turns her face out as if nothing out of the ordinary has happened.
#9: THE LOVE OF MY LIFE
(singing)
I TRIED TO GET HIS ATTENTION
BUT HE KEPT TO HIMSELF FOR YEARS
HE IGNORED ME WITH CHARM AND DISCRETION
BUT WHEN HE SPOKE
p. 40 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

BRITNEY (CONT’D)
I NEARLY CHOKED
AND HE PLAINLY EVOKED
A SONG THAT CALMED MY FEARS

VFX: #44-RAINBOW BLUR

K-FED, as Price Charming, dances in, twirling and leaping across the
stage. He carries a blonde wig, and pauses on bended knee.
K-FED
I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE THERE
HOW DID I MISS YOUR GOLDEN HAIR
He hands Britney the wig, which she places the wig on her own head.
I WALKED THROUGH THE WORLD UNAWARE
A BOY WITHOUT A CARE

AND THEN I HEARD YOU

YOU OPENED YOUR MOUTH AND YOU SANG TO ME
SWEETLY AND TRUE

AND I HELD YOU

AND I SMELLED YOU
AND I KNEW THAT YOU WERE MY STAR
YOU ARE THE LOVE OF MY LIFE
SO FAR
BRITNEY
YOU DIDN'T KNOW I WAS THERE
HOW COULD YOU MISS MY GOLDEN HAIR?
YOU WALKED THROUGH THE WORLD UNAWARE
A BOY WITHOUT A CARE

AND THEN YOU HEARD ME

K-FED
(opening his cell phone)
Yo, Shar baby?
BRITNEY
I OPENED MY MOUTH AND I SANG TO YOU
SWEETLY AND TRUE
K-FED
(into the phone)
You're trippin'. I'm movin' out.
(to Britney, singing)
AND I HELD YOU
AND I SMELLED YOU
BRITNEY
(sweetly)
Ew.
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 41

K-FED
AND I KNEW THAT YOU WERE MY STAR
BOTH
YOU ARE THE LOVE OF MY LIFE
K-FED
(into The phone)
Kiss the kid.
He hangs up.
BOTH
SO FAR
K-FED
AND YOU
BRITNEY
Will you marry me?
K-FED
AND I
BRITNEY
I bought my own ring!
K-FED
WILL FLY ON GOSSAMER WINGS, AND WE'LL SOAR
BRITNEY
Just sign.
K-FED
ONCE MORE
BRITNEY
Dotted line.
K-FED
OUR LOVE WILL BE ENDLESS AND PURE
BRITNEY
It's a prenup!
(singing)
AND YOU
K-FED
I WILL PROTECT YOU
BRITNEY
AND I
K-FED
I WILL NOT LEAVE YOU
BRITNEY
WILL FLY ON GOBSTOPPER WINGS AND WE'LL SOAR
K-FED
WE'LL SOAR
BRITNEY
WE'LL SOAR
K-FED
WE'LL SOAR
p. 42 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

BRITNEY
WE'LL SOAR
K-FED
WE’LL SO...
Britney stops him with an arm against his chest.
BRITNEY
WE'LL SOAR
SO-AH-AH-AH-AH-AH
SO-AH-AH-AH-AH-AH
SO-OH-OH-OH-OH-OH-OH
She takes an enormous breath for her final high note. Just as she starts
the note he grabs her wrist and puts her own hand over her mouth. We
can hear her muffled big note.
AHHHHHHHHHHH
They waltz in a huge circle around the floor. The elegant dance devolves
into popping and gyrating. They end up side by side upstage, facing out.
They "walk down the aisle".
(spoken)
I do. And he does too.
They sloppily make out at the altar, stopping just before the singing starts
again.
K-FED
AND THEN I HEARD YOU
YOU OPENED YOUR MOUTH AND YOU SANG TO ME
SWEETLY AND TRUE

AND I HELD YOU

BRITNEY
AND YOU HELD ME
K-FED
AND I SMELLED YOU
BRITNEY
AND I SMELLED ME
K-FED BRITNEY
AND I KNEW THAT YOU WERE MY STAR
YOU ARE THE LOVE OF MY LIFE MR. AND MRS. "BRITNEY" FOR LIFE!
BOTH
SO FAR
Blackout.

VFX: #45-BLACK

   
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 43

SCENE 4

VFX: #46-LOS ANGELES

Britney's MANAGER paces with a flip phone. He's in mid-conversation
with his client. In his other hand he holds a "shake weight", which he
obnoxiously pumps non-stop while talking.
MANAGER
I'm telling you Britney, it's a good idea.
(pause)
Because I know. A manager knows. A good one anyway. People want to know about your marriage.
(pause)
Yes, it might make you look dumb. But, so what? Dumb sells. At least to your fans. Hold on.
He pauses while he switches the phone and shake weight to opposite
hands. He starts pumping the weight with the new hand, and only then
continues the call.
Look, you have to do it. It's a TV show. You have to stay in the public eye. If you're not on TV you're
nobody.
(pause)
Just shoot something now. You're on your honeymoon, right? Just point your camera at each other and
talk.
(pause)
Yes, I'm a jerk, and I make you loads of money.
(pause)
Right, I make loads for myself too.
(pause)
You trust me, right?
(pause)
So don't trust me. Just do the dumb show!

VFX: #47-IDIOTIC TITLE

BRITNEY
(in the style of a reality TV voice-over)
Previously on "Idiotic".
Lights up on Britney and K-Fed sitting side-by-side speaking to an
unseen interviewer. Britney wears a trucker's cap, perched sideways on
her head.

VFX: #48-STUDIO SET

BRITNEY
That's what I say at the beginning of each episode. It's great! The show is a real, honest look at how we
met and fell in love, and what our daily life is like.
K-FED
(posing and throwing his own lame versions of gang hand
signs)
Kevin. Federation. Yeah.
BRITNEY
K-Fed, remember how we met?
K-FED
You were, like, "what's up?"
p. 44 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

BRITNEY
I know, I was, like, "what's up?"
K-FED
And, like, I didn't see you for, I don't know, a while. And then you were, like, come to Europe.
BRITNEY
And you came, remember? That was pretty cool.
(pointing to her cap)
Hey, I'm, like, totally wearing my hat like you wear it.
K-FED
(teasing)
Yeah, why you bitin' my style?
BRITNEY
Yeah, what up?
(a little desperate)
So do you love me? Do you?
(backtracking, slightly embarrassed)
I don't know what I mean. I mean I think I love you, whatever.
During the following, K-Fed fades away and exits with his chair.
(to the audience, blowing it off)
I don't know what I'm talking about. I like the idea of loving someone. I just love to be loved.

VFX: #49-BEDROOM
Britney is now alone, chewing gum and confessing.
(speaking to the audience, more serious, even a little
depressed)
Marriage is hard y'all! I know I shouldn't have lied to Matt Lauer when I told him everything was fine. I'm
not as happy as I said. Not even close. Even gum don't taste as good no more. Maybe Oprah was right.
(with a wag of her finger)
I gotta get it together, girl!
(beat)
I just wonder if this is all there is. Don't I deserve more?
K-Fed sleepily shuffles in SR, wearing only his underwear. He crosses in
front of Britney on his way to the bathroom. She continues to face
forward, without acknowledging him. She's been through this a thousand
times, so she waits. He exits SL.
(after a beat)
Is there anything better out there?

SFX: #8-TOILET FLUSH

(yelling to him without looking back)
Put the seat down!
#10: DIG DOWN DEEP
(singing)
I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M LOOKING FOR
I NEED TO FIND MY WAY
I KNOW, I HAVE THIS HOT ASS BOD
TONED ARMS AND LEGS FOR DAYS
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 45

BRITNEY (CONT’D)
I KNOW YOU STAND AND LOOK AT ME
AND THINK BRITNEY WHAT'S THE DEAL?
WELL THIS GIRL IS GOING DOWN AND FAST
I NEED SOMETHING THAT'S REAL
(spoken)
Something… real. People look at me and they think I have it all. Shit, I look at me and I think I have it all. I
guess it's true that money can't buy happiness. It can buy pretty amazin' eyelash extensions though. And
lots of glitter. But this girl, full of glitter and lashes is thinking. Really thinking for the first time in a long
time and waitin' to see what's next.
K-Fed walks back through the other way, scratching his butt. She still
doesn't acknowledge him, but waits until he's gone again.

VFX: #50-GOLD BLUR

(singing)
EVERYDAY I HOPE TO FIND
WHAT'S BEEN MISSING IN MY LIFE
AND CAUSING LOTS AND LOTS OF STRIFE

THESE THOUGHTS ARE SWIMMING 'ROUND IN MY MIND

’CAUSE WHEN YOU STRIP THIS GIRL OF CLOTHES
FROM HER HEAD DOWN TO HER TOES
WHAT HAVE YOU GOT?
(spoken)
You've got a naked girl y'all. Naked in her soul. Will she fall into a world of torment and denial or escape
into a magical place where she makes up her own reality? Like a snow globe. I need to work. Really get
down and do the nitty gritty, itsy bitsy, teeny weeny things that will make me whole again.
(singing)
I'M GONNA DIG DOWN WAY DOWN LOW
AND DIG UP HEAPS AND LOADS OF DIRT
I DON'T CARE HOW MUCH IT HURTS

I’M GONNA WORK HARD AND GET TO KNOW

THE REAL GIRL I'M SURE EXISTS
BANG THESE WALLS DOWN WITH MY FISTS

IT'S GONNA TAKE SOME TIME TO FIND

THE TRUE LIFE THAT SETS ME FREE
I'M WILLIN' TO WORK HARD THIS TIME
LET IT POUR RIGHT OUT OF ME
WOMEN
SHE IS READY
BRITNEY
IT IS TIME NOW
WOMEN
HOLD HER STEADY
BRITNEY
LOOK AT ME, WOW!
p. 46 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

ALL
WE DON'T CARE HOW LONG IT TAKES
NO MORE STEPPIN' ON THE BRAKES
WOMAN 1
Wait one minute, Miss Thing. Why is this time any different? You have all the money in the world. You're
the girl who has it all. You can pay someone to be your conscience.
BRITNEY
I'm not a girl anymore y'all. I'm a woman. A married woman. I have a husband to take care of, a career to
feed, responsibility. I can do it this time. You gotta trust me!
WOMAN 1
YOU'RE GONNA DIG DOWN WAY DOWN LOW?
BRITNEY
I'm diggin'.
WOMAN 2
DO THE WORK THAT'S GONNA SHOW?
BRITNEY
Real work.
MODERATOR
GIVE IT TIME AND TAKE IT SLOW?
BRITNEY
Real slow.
WOMEN
TALK TO A SHRINK AND WORK IT OUT
BRITNEY
I DON'T CARE HOW LONG IT TAKES
NO MORE STEPPIN' ON THE BRAKES
ALL WOMEN
FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HER LIFE
WE'LL FIND OUT JUST WHO SHE IS
SHE'LL BARE HER NAKED STRIPPED DOWN SOUL
AND WORK IT OUT Y'ALL, THAT'S FO SHIZ!

VFX: #51-SUNBURST
The men enter, tambourines blazing! A revival!
ALL
SHE'S GONNA DIG DOWN IN HER SOUL
DO THE WORK THAT'S GONNA SHOW

OH YES SHE IS! YES SET HER FREE!

SHE'S HERE TO WORK IT OUT AND WORK IT HARD
SWEET JESUS HEAR OUR PLEA

SHE'S GONNA DIG DOWN THAT'S FOR SURE!

CLEAN OUT HER SOUL AND MAKE HER PURE!
MEN
SHE'S GONNA
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 47

WOMEN
DIG DOWN
MEN
DIG DOWN DIG IT
WOMEN
DIG DOWN
MEN
DIG DOWN DIG IT
WOMEN
DIG DOWN
MEN
DIG DOWN DIG IT
WOMEN
DIG DOWN
MEN
DIG DOWN DIG IT
WOMEN
DIG DOWN
MEN
DIG DOWN DIG IT
WOMEN
DIG DOWN
MEN
DIG DOWN DIG IT
WOMEN
DIG DOWN
MEN
DIG DOWN DIG IT
WOMEN
DIG DOWN
MEN
DIG DOWN DIG IT
WOMEN
DIG
MEN
DIG
WOMEN
DIG
MEN
DIG
WOMEN
DIG
MEN
DIG
WOMEN
DIG
p. 48 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

MEN
DIG
WOMEN
DIG
MEN
DIG
WOMEN
DIG
MEN
DIG
WOMEN
DIG
MEN
DIG
WOMEN
DIG
MEN
DIG
WOMEN
DIG
MEN
DIG
WOMEN
DIG
MEN
DIG
WOMEN
DIG
MEN
DIG
WOMEN
DIG
MEN
DIG
WOMEN
DIG
MEN
DIG
WOMEN
DIG
MEN
DIG
WOMEN
DIG
MEN
DIG
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 49

WOMEN
DIG
MEN
DIG
ALL (EXCEPT BRITNEY)
DIG!
Britney runs to the front and turns her profile to the audience, revealing
she is very obviously pregnant.
BRITNEY
(shrugging)
Oops!
Blackout.

VFX: #52-BLACK

   
p. 50 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

SCENE 5

SFX: #9-HEARTBEAT MONITOR

VFX: #53-HEARTBEAT
Dim and moody lighting come up, dreamy like a music video.
#11: PUSH IT OUT

VFX: #54-PINK STRINGS

BRITNEY (V.O)
Doctor. I think it's time. Get him outta there.
Britney is wheeled in atop a stylized, light-festooned gurney. She is
nearly naked and fully pregnant. She undulates sexily.
The ensemble dances in hospital masks and gowns.
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
OH YEA IT HURTS
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
AND WATCH ME WORK
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
IN THE STIRRUPS Y'ALL
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
HE AIN'T THAT SMALL
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
GET HIM OUT OF THERE
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
IT'S MORE THAN I CAN BEAR
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
I GOTTA SQUEEZE HIM THROUGH
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
I FEEL LIKE I GOTTA POO
 
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 51

BRITNEY (CONT’D)
GET THIS BABY OUT OF ME
I THINK IT 'BOUT TIME FOR SURGERY
I GOT THINGS I WANNA DO
DON'T HAVE TIME FOR LITTLE BOY BLUE
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
OH YEA IT HURTS
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
AND WATCH ME WORK
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
IN THE STIRRUPS Y'ALL
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
HE AIN'T THAT SMALL
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
GET HIM OUT OF THERE
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
IT'S MORE THAN I CAN BEAR
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
I GOTTA SQUEEZE HIM THROUGH
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
I FEEL LIKE I GOTTA POO

IT'S ABOUT TIME I LOST MY FAT

LOOKIN' FINE LIKE I'M ALL THAT
Britney is on her back on the gurney with her legs spread and up.
GOTTA KEEP PUSHIN'
THE TIME IS NEAR
LISTEN FOR THAT SCREAM BABY

SFX: #10-BABY CRY

p. 52 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

Someone reaches toward Britney's open legs and raises a baby doll
toward the sky. They hand the baby to Britney.
Britney cradles the baby doll at her bosom to the beat of the music.
BRITNEY (CONT'D)
LOOKS LIKE I'M A MAMA NOW
FEELIN' AT MY JUGS I'M A MILKY COW

SFX: #11-COW MOOING

WATCH ME AS I START TO PUMP
TURN UP THE BASS AND SHAKE MY RUMP
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
I'M ON THE MOVE
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
WITH A HOT FRESH ATTITUDE
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
LET'S GET THE NANNY
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
SO I CAN WORK ON MY FANNY
A short dance break. Then, someone slides a second baby across the
stage to Britney. She catches it.
(holding up the new baby, surprised, spoken)
What?!
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
I'M ON THE MOVE
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
WITH NOT ONE BUT TWO
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
IN THE BACK OF THE CADDY
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
SO WE CAN FIND YOUR DADDY
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 53

ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
OH
ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
BRITNEY
OHHH-OHH

SFX: #12-TWO BABIES CRYING

ENSEMBLE
PUSH IT OUT
PUSH IT OUT

VFX: #55-KITCHEN
The stage clears except Britney and the two crying babies. She bobs
them up and down in a futile effort to calm them. They continue crying.
We're now in Britney's kid-filled, chaotic world. She holds the two babies
and paces with semi-frantic frustration, calling to LUPE, her maid/nanny.
(spoken)
Lupe!
(beat)
Lupe!!
During this, Lupe slips in without Britney's notice.
LU...
Britney turns and runs smack into her. Lupe is Caucasian.
Lupe, there you are! Jayden James just threw up in my mouth and Sean Preston just went number two all
over my Juicy sweat suit. I need help!
Britney shoves the babies into Lupe's outstretched arms.
Jayden needs a bottle and Sean needs a snack.
(speaking loudly, highlighting each syllable individually, as if
talking to a child)
GO TO WALMART AND GET THEM SOME COKE AND CHEETOS.
Britney turns from Lupe. Lupe leaves, comforting the babies as she
goes. Britney crosses and yells down into, presumably, a basement
rumpus room/man cave.
Kevin!
(beat)
You better not be smokin' pot down there in the kid's playroom. Lupe needs help with these kids and you
gotta get off your ass and start promotin' your new single. You wanna be the next Eminem you gotta stop
relying on me to do your promotions for you!
(no answer)
Kevin!
(no response, getting increasingly angry)
You better not be on those world wide interwebs spending my money on gamblin' sites. Don't force me to
lower your allowance. I'll do it, I swear I will!
Lupe runs in, sans babies. She speaks quickly in a heavy Irish or
Scottish accent.
p. 54 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

LUPE
Miss Britney! Sean Preston ate little Bit's poo and Jayden James projectile vomited all over the Frito Pie I
made you for lunch. What to do, Miss Britney?

BRITNEY
Kevin!
(no answer)
Kevin!
LUPE
(calm now)
He's not here, Miss Britney.
BRITNEY
Where he at Lupe?
Lupe crosses her arms with resolve. She's not gonna tell.
Lupe!
LUPE
What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.
Lupe turns on her heel and starts out. She stops and turns back.
(fiercely proud)
And my name is Bridget!
She performs a bell kick and exits.
#12: OUT OF CONTROL

VFX: #56-FIRE
Britney in a slow boil, which grows quickly.
BRITNEY
THAT'S IT!
I QUIT!
I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS

THE KIDS WON'T SIT

MY HUSBAND'S LIT
I TRIED TO GET HIM TO COMMIT
LET'S SEE WHAT HE DOES WITHOUT BRIT!

I'M THROUGH
WISE TO
HIS WHITE BOY ATTITUDE
A LAWYER saunters in with a clipboard and pen. She signs the papers,
and the Lawyer twirls and exits.
HIS LOVE UNTRUE
HIS USELESS CREW
TAKE HIS DOUGH AWAY, SEE WHAT HE'LL DO
KICK HIS ASS TO TIMBUKTU

MY BLOOD IS STARTIN' TO PERCOLATE

I'M TIRED AND I’M MAD AND I'M OVERWEIGHT
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 55

BRITNEY (CONT’D)
I FEEL LIKE I NEED TO RELEASE AND EXPLODE
GOTTA GET RID OF THIS OVERLOAD

GOTTA GO OUT ON THE TOWN

GOTTA DO IT RIGHT AND TEAR IT DOWN
GOTTA GET MY PICTURE ON THE SCENE
GOTTA PARTY LIKE I'M EIGHTEEN

VFX: #57-BLACK
Britney pulls out a cell.
(spoken)
Paris? Hey, what up girl? You up for a party?
PARIS appears with a phone to her ear.
PARIS
OMG! Fo shiz! Can Lindsay come too?
LINDSAY appears with a cell phone to her ear.
She holds up a gallon freezer bag about 1/3 full of white powder.
LINDSAY
I'm in. I'll just go to the movie set a little late tomorrow!
PARIS
You always go to the movie set a "little late tomorrow". Your career is going to be just fine.
Lindsay becomes Lupe on the spot. She holds up a pair of panties.
LUPE
Miss Britney! You forgot your knickers!
BRITNEY
Don't need ‘em!
The three girls come together in a whirlwind. They walk-the-walk and
talk-the-talk.

VFX: #58-DISCO BALL

ALL THREE
WE'RE GONNA GO OUT ON THE TOWN
GONNA DO IT RIGHT AND TEAR IT DOWN
GONNA GET MY PICTURE ON THE SCENE
GONNA DRINK UNTIL WE TURN GREEN
PARIS
I'LL POSE
LINDSAY
AND I'LL SNORT
ALL
‘TIL THE BREAK OF DAWN
WHO KNOWS WHAT KIND OF SMACK WE'RE ON

BUT WE KNOW IT FEELS GOOD

WE KNOW IT LOOKS HOT
AND IF PERCHANCE WE GET CAUGHT
p. 56 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

ALL (CONT’D)
THEN WE'LL FLIRT AND WE'LL TEASE AND LOOK STUPID
WHAT MR. OFFICER, I'M ON PAROLE?

AND WE'LL SAY TENDERLY “IS THAT WHAT I DID?”

IT SEEMS THAT I MAY BE OUT OF CONTROL

OUT OF CONTROL!
Dance break! Eventually, Paris and Lindsay are finally partied out and
leave Britney alone on the stage, still carousing.
The previous music has now become a steady club beat. Britney
continues to mime drinkin'...

VFX: #59-BLUE AND RED DANCEFLOOR LIGHTS

...fightin'...

VFX: #60-GREEN LASERS

...and pukin'...

VFX: #61-SWIRLING MULTI LIGHTS

Britney continues to dance around...

VFX: CELEBRIVENTION
...and when she stops, she now stands in the midst of her family, seated
in a tight semi-circle. Mama is there, along with JAMIE LYNN, COOTER
and Woman 2. Leading the session is an INTERVENTIONIST.
BRITNEY
What's up, Mama?
(pointing out down SR where a camera might be)
Why is that camera there?
INTERVENTIONIST
We're here to help you, Britney.
BRITNEY
(to the Interventionist, sarcastic)
Right.
INTERVENTIONIST
Do you want to have a seat with your family?
BRITNEY
Do I have a choice?
She sits in the only empty chair, between Mama and Jamie Lynn.
MAMA
We're doing a reality show called "CelebriVention". It follows the crazy lives of celebrities who are
spinning wildly out of control.
INTERVENTIONIST
But it's not really about that.
MAMA
Oh of course! It's presented in a totally artistic way that makes it seem somehow sort of okay. Plus it's on
the E! Network so it must be alright.
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 57

BRITNEY
(stage whisper, to Mama)
Wow, heartbreaking. Who we interventin' today?
INTERVENTIONIST
We're here to help you see how you're harming your career and your family and yourself.
BRITNEY
(dubious)
But mostly myself, right?
INTERVENTIONIST
Mostly. But those closest to you are also suffering. Your Mama.
He indicates Mama, who throws a hands-under-the-chin-Judy-Garland-
in-A-Star-is-Born pose at Britney.
And your beautiful and lovely little sister Jamie Lynn.
He indicates Jamie Lynn, who matches Mama's pose.
Britney ignores them and points to Cooter.
BRITNEY
And who's that guy?
INTERVENTIONIST
That's Cooter...
BRITNEY
(to Cooter)
Did I sleep with you?
INTERVENTIONIST
...your distant cousin.

BRITNEY  
(without missing a beat)
Ew!
(indicates Woman 2)
And who's she?
INTERVENTIONIST
That's Woman 2. She had nothing else to do during this scene.
WOMAN 2
(waving happily to the audience)
This is my only line!
INTERVENTIONIST
I've been here since yesterday talking with your family. And what I see here is a bunch of people who love
you like crazy. Or they need your money. Hard to tell sometimes. They're not willing to give you up.
They'll talk and then you'll talk, and then we're done. OK?
BRITNEY
(angrily resigned)
Fine.
INTERVENTIONIST
They've each written a letter to you and they would like to read them. Will you listen?
BRITNEY
No.
p. 58 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

INTERVENTIONIST
(not missing a beat)
First up, Jamie Lynn.
Jamie Lynn jumps up and performs for the unseen camera.
JAMIE LYNN
(reading from a pink piece of childish stationary)
Dear Britney. Your behavior has negatively affected me in the following ways.
(flirting with the unseen camera)
As your sister, Jamie Lynn, of the Disney show "Zoey 101" and www dot jamielynn dot com, I am so
worried about you. I'm more worried than anyone else, as you can plainly see by the tortured look on my
face, proving once again the range of emotion I'm capable of communicating to an audience. I was so
distraught, in a powerful yet appealing way, that I couldn't enjoy my Teen Choice Award nomination for
"Breakout Female Performer".
She waves at the camera.
Thanks, you guys! I love all my fans!
(somber again)
Get better Britney. Or at least get better press. I… love… you.
(beat as she smiles sweetly, then quickly back to the camera)
jamielynn dot com!
#12A: OUT OF CONTROL - REPRISE #1
Britney slowly turns to Jamie Lynn.
BRITNEY
YOU'RE FIRED!
I'M TIRED
I'M TAKIN' YOU OFF THE PAYROLL

LET'S SEE WHAT YOU'LL DO

NOW THAT WE'RE THROUGH
AND YOU HAVE NO DOUGH
YOU LITTLE HO!
JAMIE LYNN
(sweet as pie)
Actually, I'm all set! I don't need your money any more. Maybe you haven't heard, but I'm the fresher,
younger, unspoiled, non-flabby version of you. And, unlike you, I'm not having sex until I'm an adult and
married.
She giggles.
#12B: OUT OF CONTROL US
In the following Britney is speaking to the stage manager or the
conductor.
BRITNEY
(testy)
Jerry?
STAGE MANAGER
Yes?
BRITNEY
Stop playing that!
The music stops, then back to the family.
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 59

BRITNEY (CONT’D)
You're all fired then! OK? Ha ha!! That's right, the well's dried up. Been there done that. Stick a fork in me
I'm done. Let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya. Adios muchachos!
COOTER
(to Woman 1 in a heavy, backwoods accent)
She's not taking it very well.
BRITNEY
(to Cooter)
Stop it!
(to Mama)
You hear me? No more money.
MAMA
(amused and devious)
Oh sweetie, you have no power here. Jamie Lynn's put us on her payroll. We'll be just fine.
She giggles.
BRITNEY
(seething)
Jerry?!
STAGE MANAGER
Yes?
BRITNEY
Play that weirdo music again!
#12C: OUT OF CONTROL - REPRISE #2

VFX: #63-ANGRY FIRE

As Britney sings, the scenes fades away until she's alone on stage.
(singing)
I'M GOIN' OUT ON THE TOWN
GONNA DO IT RIGHT AND TEAR IT DOWN
GONNA GET MY PICTURE ON THE SCENE
GONNA PARTY ‘TIL I TURN GREEN

I'LL POSE AND I'LL SNORT TIL THE BREAK OF DAWN

WHO KNOWS WHAT KIND OF SMACK I'M ON

BUT I KNOW IT FEELS GOOD

AND I SORTA LOOK HOT
The ensemble enters from all sides, cameras in hand.
ALL (EXCEPT BRITNEY)
OUT OF CONTROL!
OUT OF CONTROL!

SFX: #13-CAMERAS

VFX: #64-FLASHES
The ensemble, as rabid paparazzi, circle Britney, flashing their cameras
and taunting: "Britney look here!", "Smile!", "Show us your underwear!",
"Give us all of you!"
p. 60 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

The music builds to a crescendo, Britney screams and then all

movement stops. The photographers are quiet and frozen mid-stance.
Britney moves out from the middle of the circle, pauses at the edge of
the stage. She hesitates for a moment, then exits.

SFX: #14-ELECTRIC SHAVER

VFX: #65-VORTEX
The sound of a hair shaver builds. The music kicks back in. The
ensemble performs a drama-filled modern dance while frantically waving
blonde hair extensions.

VFX: #66-BLACK
All sounds and motion slows and calms. The hair is ceremoniously
collected and dispatched.
The STYLIST, BODYGUARD, PSYCHOANALYST and Manager step
forward.
STYLIST
She sat in my chair and said her hair extensions were too tight. Then she said "I want my hair shaved off".
I said "Well I'm not doing it". I tried to talk her out of it. I said, "You know maybe you're having a hormonal
moment or something, and maybe tomorrow you'll feel differently about it."
(indicates the bodyguard standing next to her)
I was talking to her bodyguard and she just grabbed the buzzer and began buzzing off her hair. I cleaned
it up when she was done with it.
BODYGUARD
She wasn't too emotional at first. Then she sorta had tears in her eyes and starting worrying about what
her mom would say. She said her mom was gonna be mad.
STYLIST
She welled up when she talked about her mom. Then she realized what she had done. I asked about her
kids, but she didn't want to chat. I thought maybe she could start a trend. Maybe girls would start shaving
their heads.
PSYCHOANALYST
She was acting out. Like a child.
STYLIST
I tried to make her feel better.
BODYGUARD
She also got two tattoos. One on her hip and one on her wrist.
PSYCHOANALYST
Shaving her head and tattooing her body is her way of taking control. She's rebelling against the people
who handled and molded her.
MANAGER
I told her, you have to do this to stay in the public eye. If you're not on TV you're nobody!
Mama enters.
MAMA
A mama always knows what's right for her child. Some people just don't understand.
The lights dim and everyone exits except Mama. She moves downstage.
The day after Britney shaved her head I went out for lunch. I was devastated and broken, but I also had to
continue my life, if only for the sake of my children. I was trying to be strong, put up a reassuring front,
appear confident.
(beat)
I smiled.
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 61

Mama smiles broadly to illustrate.

SFX: #15-OLD FASHIONED FLASH BULB

MAMA (CONT’D)
At just that moment a paparazzo must have snapped a photo from outside the restaurant. That photo
appeared the next day in the tabloids with a terrible caption about how I don't care about my daughter.
How can I not care? I could reel off a laundry list of ways I failed my family. But, at some point I have to
file those feelings away and throw away the key. A mother has to finally say "No more". Britney is going to
be fine. She is still my brave, tenderhearted fighter. I know she'll find her way. She's got a lot more going
on in her beautiful head than people know.
Mama puts on a pair of glasses. Her demeanor changes as she
becomes the Moderator.
MODERATOR
So we do it again.
#12D: PROMISES INTRO - REPRISE

VFX: #67-PROMISES SIGN 2

We will bring her in. Again and again, until we get her right.
The group members enter and take their seats.
Whether it was court-ordered or not, thank you for coming. Here at "Promises, Promises" we are your
personal "PR Fixery and Spirit Spa", and we cater to the exceptionally beautiful and the moderately
talented. As you enter this program...
Britney enters and interrupts. The music abruptly stops.
BRITNEY
Wait a minute! Wait just a damn minute! Haven't we done this before? I already did this, didn't I?
WOMAN 1
(standing)
We'll always be here. We'll keep doing it until you get it right.
#13: REPRISES
MAN 2
Here, you have all the power.
WOMAN 2
Here, you can create your own universe.
MAN 1
Here, you can be forever fabulous.
MODERATOR
YOU ARE LOST, WANDERING AIMLESSLY
WE ARE HERE, EMBRACING YOU LOVINGLY
STAY WITH US
BRITNEY
Stay here? Why would I stay here?
MODERATOR
We're all parts of you. When you're scared or in trouble you can reach out, just by thinking us up. And
we'll help. But you have to choose to keep us. Choose to reach inside and cross that divide between self-
delusion and self-help. I'll be here to guide.
WOMAN 2
And we'll be the friends who'll never turn the pictures over to TMZ.
p. 62 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

MAN 1
Stay here. Choose us.
MODERATOR
YOU HAVE THE SENSE TO KNOW JUST WHO YOU ARE
YOU HAVE THE DRIVE TO BE ALL YOU'LL BE
WOMAN 1
Or, stay on your current path and... Well...
WOMAN 2
Then all bets are off.
MAN 1
If you go back to your old life, who knows what could happen to you? Strange and impossible things
could happen! You could run over a paparazzo's foot.
MAN 2
Or beat up a car with an umbrella.
WOMAN 1
You could have a disastrously embarrassing appearance on the video music awards.
MAN 2
You could even lose custody of your children.
BRITNEY
To who?
MAN 1
K-Fed.
BRITNEY
Be serious.
MAN 1
(to Moderator with sudden, giddy excitement)
She might then get married yet again, this time to her former agent, who might give her a dazzling ring!
(to Britney, giddiness mounting)
The press could inexplicably fall in love with you all over again and everything might be OK after all.
He gasps and covers his mouth, realizing he has said too much.
BRITNEY
(befuddled, but hopeful)
What?
MODERATOR
Never mind. We want you. And we can protect you. If you stay here.
BRITNEY
Where's here?
MODERATOR
Remember when you were little, and you made up shows in your imagination? They felt so real. Same
thing here. Your own story... Your way... In your head.
BRITNEY
Like a movie in my mind?
MODERATOR
Sorta. But a musical in your mind. If you believe.
ENSEMBLE
THIS IS YOUR I WANT SONG
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 63

MODERATOR
Musicals can save your soul. And all it will take is your total and unbridled commitment to an inherently
ridiculous art form. Stay with us, and you'll always be a star. We have something to show you.
The Moderator holds up a sparkly poster that says "BRITNEY THE
MUSICAL".

SFX: #16-MAGICAL TINKLING

VFX: #68-BRITNEY THE MUSICAL

BRITNEY
"Britney The Musical"?

VFX: #69-PROMISES SIGN 2

MODERATOR
The stage is almost set. We're merely await your word. Your opening night is right now.
BRITNEY
I do want that.
MODERATOR
We know. And don't you deserve it?
MODERATOR & MAN 1
JUST REMEMBER IT'S FOR YOUR OWN GOOD
WOMAN 1, WOMAN 2, MAN 2
THIS IS YOUR I WANT SONG
MODERATOR & MAN 1
SO SMILE AND SING LIKE WE KNOW YOU SHOULD
MAN 2
PUSH IT OUT!
MODERATOR WOMAN 1, WOMAN 2
JUST REMEMBER IT'S FOR YOUR OWN GOOD YOU GOTTA DIG DOWN WAY DOWN LOW
MAN 1
THIS IS YOUR I WANT SONG
MODERATOR WOMAN 1, WOMAN 2, MAN 1 MAN 2
SO SMILE AND SING LIKE
WE KNOW YOU SHOULD I WANT SONG PUSH IT OUT
Man 1 hands a small decorative vial to the Moderator.
MODERATOR
Ask your heart what you really want. And wait for the answer.
MAN 1
(excited, to the Moderator)
We're doing a random dream ballet, right?
MODERATOR
Britney, you must make a choice right now. Will you cross the line?
The Moderator puts the vial into Britney's hand.
BRITNEY
(holding the bottle up and out and addressing it directly)
Oh, 'Lixir of Egypt. Make up mah mind fer me. I'm waitin' for the answer.
Britney throws her head back and drinks the contents of the vial.
p. 64 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

SFX: #17-ROLLING THUNDER

VFX: #70-BLACK
Everyone else fades back. Britney melts to the floor.
MODERATOR
(with great import)
Let the world of awkwardly inserted dance numbers show you the way to the edge of decision.
#14: DREAM BALLET

VFX: #71-DREAM BALLET

A primal, tribal dance.
Throughout, the Moderator waves her hands over the proceedings as if
directing with her own will. Man 1, Man 2, Woman 1 and Woman 2 each
get their moment with Britney, and she matches their individual dance
moves.
At the top of the dance, a rope of light is introduced. The light rope is laid
downstage and becomes the line over which Britney must cross. Again
and again she dances up to the line, trying to force herself across, but
always fails at the last moment. The music ends with a thunder clap.
Britney stands with the tips of her toes against the line.

SFX: #18-THUNDER CLAP

VFX: #72-FIREWORKS

VFX: #72-BLACK
#15: CROSS THAT LINE
STAY AND IT'S ALL YOURS
Everyone except Britney fades back a bit, leaving her alone with the line
to ponder her choice.
BRITNEY
I'M NOT SURE WHAT TO DO
WHICH DIRECTION SHOULD I TURN?
I FEEL MY HEARTBEAT QUICKEN
AS MY STOMACH STARTS TO CHURN

A LIFE OF WEALTH AND CHAOS

OR ETERNAL MUSIC BLISS
THE SOUNDTRACK OF MY LIFE
SHOWS THAT SOMETHING'S GONE AMISS

WILL THE PEOPLE MISS ME

WILL THEY EVEN KNOW I'VE GONE
OR WILL THEY THINK THAT POOR LITTLE GIRL
WHAT PLANET IS SHE ON?

AS I STAND HERE I DECIDE MY FATE

AND MY SOUL IS SPLIT IN TWO
IT'S A MOMENT I MUST TREASURE
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 65

BRITNEY (CONT'D)
FOR I KNOW WHAT I MUST DO
I'M HERE TO CROSS THAT LINE
She holds the note an obnoxiously long time. As she's holding the note,
Woman 1 moves forward and gives her a small push. Britney gently
stumbles across the line.
Thank you.
(singing)
AS I STAND HERE ALL ALONE
I WILL MAKE THE MOMENT MINE
I CAN DO THIS ON MY OWN
The line of light is unceremoniously switched off and removed.
#16: HERE I'LL BE
I WAS UP, I WAS DOWN
THE HIT OF THE TOWN
I WAS SWEET, I WAS HARD
SORTA STONED, MAINLY SCARRED
BUT HERE I'LL BE

VFX: #74-PRIMARY BLUR

BRITNEY ENSEMBLE
IN THIS PLACE, I'VE FOUND HOME OOH, OOH
I GIVE THANKS, I ATONE OOH, OOH
STAND BY ME, WATCH ME RISE OOH, OOH
IN THIS SPACE I AM WISE OOH, OOH
AND HERE I'LL BE OOH, HERE SHE’LL BE

SOMETHING GREAT IS HAPPENING SHA LA LA, SHA LA LA

IN THIS WORLD THAT I HAVE FOUND WORLD SHE HAS FOUND
I WATCH MY OLD LIFE SINK
AS I HOVER OVER GROUND HOVERING, HOVERING OOH

I HAVE LOST, I HAVE FOUND SHE HAS LOST, SHE HAS FOUND
A NEW LIFE, FREER SOUND A NEW LIFE, FREER SOUND
SAY GOODBYE, SAY HELLO SAY GOODBYE, SAY HELLO
HOLD ME UP, LET ME GO HOLD HER UP, LET HER GO

'CAUSE HERE I'LL BE OOH, OOH

HERE I'LL BE HERE SHE’LL BE, HERE SHE’LL BE
HERE I'LL BE HERE SHE’LL BE
ALL
SOMETHING GREAT IS HAPPENING
IN THIS WORLD THAT I/SHE HAVE/HAS FOUND
I/WE WATCH MY/HER OLD LIFE SINK
AS I/WE HOVER OVER GROUND
p. 66 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

BRITNEY ENSEMBLE
IT'S A LIFE THAT I MUST TREASURE OOH, OOH
AND I KNOW WHO I MUST BE OOH, OOH
THEY LIFT ME UP TO THE GREATEST HEIGHTS WE LIFT HER UP

AND I'M FINALLY FREE SHE’S FREE

I'M FINALLY FREE SHE’S FREE

'CAUSE HERE I'LL BE SHA NA NA, SHA NA NA

SHA NA NA NA NA NA
HERE SHE’LL BE
Britney ends the song bear-hugging herself. She has decided to
embrace this weird internal world, and she’s happy.
STAGE MANAGER
OK, people. Let's clear those chairs! Places. This is your places call. Places everybody!
The stage clears, leaving Britney alone downstage. On their way out, the
other actors pat her on the back and shakes her hand, congratulating
her. Once they’re gone, she stares out, unsure. Her smiles have turned
into mild trepidation. A moment passes.

SFX: #19-CITY STREET

VFX: #75-TIMES SQUARE

The Moderator, now as a TV host, appears upstage with her back to us.
Britney turns upstage to watch. The Moderator turns to the front, holding
a microphone.
MODERATOR
Reporting from Times Square. I'm standing just down the block from the theatre which is the focus of
everyone's intense excitement. It's the event we've all been anxiously awaiting. It's been a long time
coming, but it's here at last. Britney The Musical is finally making its debut. She's made it, folks! We all
knew she could.
Britney turns out again, noticeably nervous as she continues to listen.
In a moment we will take you with us as we witness the opening number, which should be the start of a
whole new chapter.
The Moderator talks to Britney's back. Britney remains facing front.
Britney, how do you feel?
BRITNEY
(clicking into "celebrity" mode)
Oh, I feel great! I look great. I've never been better!
MODERATOR
Are you confident about your decision to do this?
BRITNEY
Totally confident. Totally. No doubts. Not one.
(losing the bravado, her insecurity bleeding through)
I've never been more sure of anything in my...
She trails off, obviously terrified.
The Moderator lowers the microphone.

VFX: #76-RED CURTAIN

BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 67

MODERATOR
(warmly supportive)
Are you ready, honey?
BRITNEY
(a beat, then with determination)
I am. I'm ready.
MODERATOR
You're going to be great. You're going to be loved.
BRITNEY
That's good. Will you be there?
MODERATOR
Always.
She touches her temples with her fingertips.
Right here.
She puts her palms to her heart.
And here.
Lights down on The Moderator and she exits.

SFX: MAGICAL TINKLING

Britney puts her hands on her heart, resting on her left breast.

BRITNEY  
(sincerely baffled, gentle)
In my boob?
STAGE MANAGER
(warm, handling her lovingly)
Britney?
BRITNEY
Yes, Jerry?
STAGE MANAGER
Places for the top of act one.
BRITNEY
Thank you.
Britney smiles, triumphant. The audience, and her new, better life awaits.
She exits.
Blackout.

VFX: #73-BLACK
#17: THE FINALE
STAGE MANAGER
Ladies and Gentlemen! Opening night! Britney The Musical!

VFX: #78-LENS FLARE LIGHTS

The entire stage becomes a glitzy (bordering on cheesy) extravaganza.
The women enter dancing.
MODERATOR WOMAN 1, WOMAN 2
ONCE UPON A TIME WOO HOO HOO
THERE WAS A SWEET YOUNG THING
p. 68 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

MODERATOR (CONT’D) WOMAN 1, WOMAN 2 (CONT’D)

SHE COULD TWIST AND TWIRL WOO HOO HOO
AND SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE
AND REALLY SWING

SHE HAD HER SHARE OF UPS AND DOWNS WOO HOO HOO
SOME HIGHS AND SOME LOWS
MODERATOR, WOMAN 1, WOMAN 2
BUT NOW IT SEEMS THIS POPSTAR QUEEN HAS GOT HER OWN SHOW

BECOMING BRITNEY
BECOMING BRITNEY
BECOMING BRITNEY
BECOMING BRITNEY

NOW DON'T YOU GET THE WRONG IDEA ABOUT THIS LITTLE GIRL
WITH THE MONEY SHE HAS MADE THIS YEAR
SHE'S SET TO RULE THE WORLD

BECOMING BRITNEY
BECOMING BRITNEY
The men enter dancing.
MODERATOR WOMEN & MEN
YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU KNOW HER WOO HOO HOO
AND YOU'RE OH SO QUICK TO JUDGE

SHE JUST NEEDS A BIT OF HELP WOO HOO HOO

AND A TINY LITTLE NUDGE

IT'S JUST WHAT WE'VE BEEN WAITING WOO HOO HOO

FOR THE COMEBACK OF ALL TIME
ALL
SHE'LL DANCE IT OUT AND TWIST AND SHOUT
LIKE SHE WAS IN HER PRIME

BECOMING BRITNEY
BECOMING BRITNEY
BECOMING BRITNEY
BECOMING BRITNEY

VFX: #79-BLACK
The stage is plunged into darkness. The music changes drastically.
BRITNEY (V.O.)
It's show time. Get Britney to the stage. That ain't how Britney does Broadway, y'all.

VFX: #80-BLUE LIGHTS

BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 69

Lights up on Britney, who is flanked in seductive poses by Man 1, Man 2,

Woman 1 and Woman 2.
BRITNEY
HEY WORLD LISTEN HERE
COME IN AND SAY HELLO
IT'S TIME YOU START TO CHEER
'CAUSE I'VE GOT A BROADWAY SHOW

I'VE BEEN TO HELL AND BACK

THROUGH THE FLAMES OF HOLLYWOOD
AS MY MIND IT STARTS TO CRACK
STILL MY BODY, I LOOK GOOD

I MAKE PEOPLE EVERYWHERE MAKE THEM STOP AND STARE

HEY BRITNEY WON'T YA LOOK AT ME
I'M RISIN' STRAIGHT UP TO THE TOP AND I'M BECOMING BRITNEY
Dance break.
ONCE UPON A TIME I WAS A SWEET YOUNG THING
I COULD TWIST AND TURN AND SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE
AND REALLY SING

I HAD MY SHARE OF UPS AND DOWNS SOME HIGH AND SOME LOWS
BUT NOW IT SEEMS THIS POP STAR QUEEN HAS GOT HER OWN SHOW
EVERYBODY SING!

B-B-B-B-B
B-B-B-B-B
B-B-B-B-B
SHE'S BECOMING BRITNEY
BRITNEY, ENSEMBLE (EXCEPT MODERATOR)
B-B-B-B-B
B-B-B-B-B
B-B-B-B-B
SHE'S BECOMING BRITNEY
BRITNEY
YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU KNOW ME
YOU'RE OH SO QUICK TO JUDGE
I JUST NEED LITTLE A BIT OF HELP
AND A TINY LITTLE NUDGE

IT'S JUST WHAT WE'VE BEEN WAITING FOR

THE COMEBACK OF ALL TIME
I'LL DANCE IT OUT AND TWIST AND SHOUT
LIKE I WAS IN MY PRIME
EVERYBODY SING!
p. 70 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

VFX: #81-EVERYBODY SING

The cast encourages the audience to sing along with the chorus.
BRITNEY, ENSEMBLE, AUDIENCE
B-B-B-B-B
B-B-B-B-B
B-B-B-B-B
SHE'S BECOMING BRITNEY

B-B-B-B-B
B-B-B-B-B
B-B-B-B-B
SHE'S BECOMING BRITNEY

VFX: #82-BLUE LIGHTS

BRITNEY
(spoken with music)
Hey world listen here
Come in and say hello
It’s time to start to cheer
I’ve got a Broadway show

I’ve been to hell and back

Through the flames of Hollywood
As my mind it starts to crack
Still my body, I look good

I make people everywhere make 'em stop and stare

(singing)
HEY BRITNEY WON'T YA LOOK AT ME
I'M RISIN' STRAIGHT UP TO THE TOP AND I'M BECOMING BRITNEY

VFX: #83-EVERYBODY SING

BRITNEY, ENSEMBLE, AUDIENCE
B-B-B-B-B
B-B-B-B-B
B-B-B-B-B
SHE'S BECOMING BRITNEY

B-B-B-B-B
B-B-B-B-B
B-B-B-B-B
SHE'S BECOMING BRITNEY

VFX: #84-BLUE LIGHTS

Dance break.
BRITNEY
We’re missing someone, y'all.
BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT p. 71

BRITNEY, ENSEMBLE
B-B-B-B-B
B-B-B-B-B
B-B-B-B-B
The Moderator makes a huge entrance and blows the roof off the joint.
MODERATOR
SHE'S BECOMING BRITNEY!
(spoken with music)
Hey world listen up
We hope you like our show
You laughed and cried and wet your pants
We’re hopin' that you know
That we really really thank you all
For bein' here tonight
'Cuz we you know got a lot to do
And think that you are tight

We’re gonna wave and say goodbye

'Cuz we're exhausted y'all
Tell your friends about the show
You know they'll have a ball

I can only think of one more

Thing that's left to say
It goes a little somethin' like B-B-B
BRITNEY
B-B-B-B-B
MODERATOR
B-B-B-B-B
BRITNEY
B-B-B-B-B
MODERATOR
SHE'S BECOMING BRITNEY
ALL
B-B-B-B-B
B-B-B-B-B
B-B-B-B-B
SHE'S BECOMING BRITNEY

SHE'S BECOMIN'
SHE'S BECOMIN'
ENSEMBLE BRITNEY, MODERATOR
SHE'S BECOMIN' SHE'S BECOMIN', SHE'S BECOMIN', SHE'S BECOMIN'
SHE'S BECOMIN' SHE'S BECOMIN', SHE'S BECOMIN', SHE'S BECOMIN'
ENSEMBLE
BRITNEY!
BRITNEY, MODERATOR
BRITNEY!
p. 72 BECOMING BRITNEY - PERUSAL SCRIPT

ENSEMBLE
BRITNEY!
BRITNEY, MODERATOR
BRITNEY!
ALL
SHE'S BECOMING BRITNEY!

VFX: #85-BLACK
Curtain y'all.
#18: BOWS

VFX: #86-LOGO

VFX: #87-BLACK

END OF SHOW