TABLE OF CONTENTS

A ∴ A ∴ Argenteum Astrum
Probationer
Superior
Persephone
Diary
Motto
Robe
Pastor's lovely trouble
Pyramidos
A letter to one Probationer
Another letter to the Probationer
Book of the Heart girt with a Serpent
Appendix I
Appendix II
Appendix III
Appendix IV
Appendix V
CHAPTER ONE
 A ∴A ∴
ARGENTEUM ASTRUM

What you want and what you do not want is one and the same thing.
Because in the end, that end is always the same. On the other side, yet, is the
beginning. And the A ∴ A ∴ is everything. That is the only statement
which I found to be true enough and stimulating of all descriptions I have
ever managed to suggest concerning the A ∴ A ∴ ; and the more I have
thought about it during all these years, the closer I have been to the very
beginning. Stimulating in the sense that it contains all that the A ∴ A ∴ is,
it is so severe in regards to everything that the A ∴ A ∴ is not. However, if
the A ∴ A ∴ is everything, is that everything enough for us? In order to
understand this, we should primarily understand the very nature of the
A ∴ A ∴ ; what it is in its very essence and what it represents. Little has
been done so far for the Aspirants to truly comprehend what the A ∴ A ∴ is
before they undertake for their life something as magnificent as giving the
Oath of a Probationer. Although almost everything is practically known about
the formal structure of the A ∴ A ∴ , at least regarding the Golden Dawn[1],
the places where we can find indications about its essence are seldom.
Somehow, it seems that historical records, an abundant list of literature and
exceptionally clear, scientifically explicit explained Grades, all become just
an excuse for ignoring that essential, simple childlike question: What is the
A ∴ A ∴ ? As if the A ∴ A ∴ itself wanted to play a game with us,
creating a mystery at the very beginning. If we now look closer into one of
the basic tenets of the A ∴ A ∴ which claims that mystery is the enemy of
truth, then we cannot but ask ourselves if the A ∴ A ∴ is a friend of this
same mystery? What kind of principle is this tenet which is disregarded so
impudently and openly right at the threshold?
The A ∴ A ∴ is a living body. More so, the A ∴ A ∴ is at the same
time a living organism of that simplest, most wicked nature. The species
which manages to survive over time, which adapts to all circumstances and
every environment. The A ∴ A ∴ is a virus of the deadliest kind, one
transmitted by a thoughtful touch. Its incubation period is ever; although
nobody has yet perished from it, no one has ever been cured for sure. That
virus, once it has settled into its host, starts to do something that is an entirely
unique phenomenon in the universe. Instead of changing its host, it changes
the universe. So elegantly and with such sophistication that the host himself
also starts to change without even noticing, because he is a part of that same
universe. Actually, it is not yet known if the change of the host is the result of
the virus act, or it is self-delusion of his immune system. Its treatment is so
slow that we cannot say for sure if this change is the result of it, or merely a
natural deviation occurring over time. The A ∴ A ∴ is a virus, once it has
been inserted into our mind, it starts to reign over us eternally, without even
doing anything at all. Its fundamental influence is upon the system of
thinking and neural connections. As if the infected being, frightened by the
appearance of this new foreign body, starts to surround itself with the light,
so bright and so enchanted that it casts away all darkness. The A ∴ A ∴ is
an elusion of light; it is a mist of a never explored region, it is an excuse of
our being that, under the state of emergency, starts to produce a new value,
spiritual value, and the whole system begins to work for some new purpose.
What is then this foreign body whose cause is ourselves? Who is the real host
and who is the real intruder in this wondrous mechanism? And what kind of
treachery is it which seems like a game, again so serious that seems like a
war?
Master Abuldiz once said that the A ∴ A ∴ is All. And it looks like
we need that to be repeated once in a while. Before we endeavor to put things
into place, it may be convenient first to try to define that All or Everything.
Everything is a concept delineated by two quite certain points, that which we
call the beginning and that which we call the end and the whole essence of
this story lays woven across this loom. Unfortunately, nobody remembers the
beginning, and from the end nobody has returned, so the geography of this
region is pretty obscure. On the other hand, regarding the history itself,
humanity mostly remembers only what it finds suitable; but what is indeed
certain is that there is nothing that shakes the human society as extraordinary
as the appearance of Genius. Hence, what is Genius? What is this anomaly
whose nature is Everlast and outcome is Always? If something is certain,
there is a mechanism through which a divine scheme is manifested, no matter
how random its appearance may seem.
The concept of Genius is tightly connected with the concept of the
A ∴ A ∴ , by the plain fact that both of these concepts have no reasonable
explanation. What we can openly assume is that Genius is a specific form not
of intelligence but awareness. In a similar way in which the term Buddha
differs in Hinayana and Mahayana, Genius in our context does not
necessarily represent a person with intelligence, but rather with a specific
authenticity which, though often uses high intelligence, does not necessitate
it. It seems that Genius is a being less conscious of himself and his
surroundings than it is of the interaction of these two, or, to put it in simpler
terms, a being who is aware of his own path and his true nature. Genius
draws and finds resemblance from all spheres and all heavens, and we shall
only mildly mention one of Parsifal, Levi, Leonardo, and Tesla.
It is now worth noting that the nature of Genius is quite akin to the
nature of the Fool. In the outer environment, people of their time perceive
this being as deviant and morbid, sometimes even showing a benevolent
attitude towards him, trying with all their might to help this being and bring
him under the wing of the mother mediocrity. But the nature of Genius is like
a storm; predictable but undoubtedly unstoppable.
Furthermore, who is the most powerful court figure? Is it the pompous
King, or the pouting Queen? Who has the power to tell everything directly
into everyone’s face, whether true or false and stay alive? When a kingdom
falls, the only person that is left to live is the court Fool; moreover, he will
surely keep his role as a Fool at the court of a new King. The Fool is alive
only because of his foolishness, and the crazier, more insolent, and more
reckless things he says, the more he will be rewarded. The Fool knows all the
secrets of the court, everyone trusts him, because the Fool takes nobody’s
side. Furthermore, no one thinks that the Fool will abuse that trust for
personal gain because he has no personality. He is mad. Everyone confides in
him for everyone is sure the Fool is too stupid to take any advantages from it.
The Fool knows everything as everyone thinks that the Fool knows nothing.
Because one who knows he is stupid is in much more lead than those who
just think they are smart. Hence the Fool is Genius. His job is to be mad, to
be nothing else than what he is, and we can only roam in the shadows of our
thoughts to search for his true aim.
Definition of madness. Occasional changes in people’s behavior which
are deployed randomly enough in what we call civilization. It creates a
pattern that ratio defines as abnormal or beyond ordinary, depending on the
cultural subgroup. An interruption in the appearance of such a change leads
to the perception of the change. Thus, beyond ordinary is that which is
inconceivable. Abnormal is that which is misunderstood. Sometimes
perverse, sometimes lovely, sometimes miraculous, but always based on the
intersection of all descriptions, and that is – attractive. This spice in the meal
of our soul is present in every Grade of our Order, except in the case of
Adeptus Exemptus and some cases of Dominus Liminis. Attraction is the
exclusive ability and the monopoly of Will, not as a law but as an intrigue; as
mobility of our Ruach to focus on seemingly dead and unimportant things,
always for only one reason – because it wants it so.
Therefore, madness caught Genius with an infection, divine madness
that can be transmitted only by other Genius. This virus of insanity that
involves your being at the moment when you think clearly enough about
yourself, holding that thought, perhaps not more than a moment. The
A ∴ A ∴ is a virus. The objective of this infection, the only purpose of this
virus is to tear down your immune system to the extent that it cuts all the
influence of the Divine on your own soul. This is the time of the viruses. This
is their time, and there is nothing we can do about it.
All that can be said about Genius does not deserve more than a few
paragraphs of this book. We can say that all, even the negative connotations
towards Genius are nothing else than his worshipping. Therefore, jealousy
and the worst envy against Genius is the blessing of his appearance, while
ignoring him is yet blasphemy of the highest kind. There is no greater sin for
society than neglecting a Genius, and we can be sure that nature will sooner
or later find ways to sanction society, even the entire epoch in its ignorance
before the appearance of such a divine creation.
What defines Genius is his authenticity, his exceptionality which
exceeds all standards of taste and mediocrity, to the extent that the worst
vulgarity in his possession easily becomes an object of the highest divine
providence. Every movement of Genius is therefore accompanied by
authenticity, from the way of his speech, walking, and even so corrupt things
such as tics; it seems that the authenticity of Genius is magnificent in things
that an ordinary man would suffer in the eyes of critics. The nature of Genius
cannot be stereotyped into any particular acts, and as long as such work is of
the usual kind, it can equally be so far from a reasonable classification that it
may seem to us that Genius is loafing, while in his mind with child's
enthusiasm he deals with trial essentials for the survival of the Universe. The
phenomenon of Genius cannot be conditioned by its definition and
observation in the eyes of the outside world. We can assume how many
Geniuses went unnoticed like the fall of autumn leaves behind our back, how
many Geniuses realized their courses while the whole world slept. We can
believe that Genius is a self-sufficient process, and certainly not a mere
resultant of the forces. He is more a specific type of counterpoint of destiny
towards something that is now quite near to the A ∴ A ∴ . And that is the
mechanism of moving the universe. Genius only uses this particularity, his
inalienable authenticity to draw the attention of the Gods to what he has been
predestined to do. Mechanism of Genius’s motion is the same mechanism as
the A ∴ A ∴ motion, only the opposite direction. Genius, therefore, exerts
its nature from outside, while the A ∴ A ∴ acts inward; understanding one
mechanism reveals the other.
The A ∴ A ∴ is a virus that paralyzes the body so Genius could
possess it; so briefly that fate could not notice, long enough to fully accept
the new karma as his own. For Genius is precisely like that, to act out of
range of all external influences even at the cost of complete destruction and
wasting of one whole incarnation. Genius is such as it is because it is just as
such and like no other.
The true name of Lord Buddha is Tathāgata, which means "suchness."
His true name denotes his true achievement, and this is nothing more than the
nature of suchness, that is, the Truth is as it is – whatever it is. The least we
can conclude is that the nature of Buddhahood is so true and enlightening
precisely because of the fact that it is so unique and authentic. This is not
about emphasizing on what it was, but precisely on how it is. Something
which is solely the Truth has no purpose for the symbol because this symbol
is a lie as any other. But even the lie of the Truth is the truth about the lie of
the Truth. Tathāgata is indeed the true name of Buddha and the nature of
every Genius.
Genius is, therefore, the only true aim within the A ∴ A ∴ , and all
that we will testify further is the achievement of such a Genius. Genius is the
A ∴ A ∴ , and the A ∴ A ∴ is Genius, and everything we will encounter
is nothing more than the signs along the road. It is of utmost importance that
your journey in the A ∴ A ∴ is pervaded with freedom and unburdening,
and most importantly, with a child's sense of play. Pay no attention to
someone else's success, especially to your own. Count that the vast majority
of everything you will ever hear from others is complete nonsense. Do not
identify your advancement with wrong statistics, but only and ever in relation
to oneself. From the beginning, it has never been sufficiently emphasized that
the A ∴ A ∴ is an individual system in the first place. There is the one who
introduced you and the one whom you introduce, and that is the whole thing.
It is the closed system, which in all its closeness has one sole quality of
openness. Openness for Genius. The Grades are nothing but your own
guideposts, and all you discover is that they are like an act of onion peeling.
Advancement through them, no matter how many current truths it reveals,
actually serves to reject these truths and not to perceive them, since none of
these truths is permanent, acting only as a consequence of staying in one
Grade. How brilliant is the observation that neither experience nor
achievement in the A ∴ A ∴ is assimilation but transcendence, which
occasionally implies their destruction. The only two relevant attainments in
the Universe, the Knowledge and Conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel
and crossing the Abyss, are, in fact, completely diametrical. With the first
one, you achieve what you are, so after that you can achieve what you are
not. In all paradox, you cannot achieve what you are, not before you achieve
what you needed to reject. This rejecting is not a passive motion at all. The
essence is not to remain a child but to become a child. That covers all the
secret and wisdom of everything we will talk about; all Grades are nothing
but preparing for that task. Advancement in the Golden Dawn, from a
Probationer to Dominus Liminis at first glance may look like the assimilation
of the elements and the formula of Tetragrammaton, but it is everything
except that as only an Adept can have real knowledge of elements. The
passage further involves awareness not of the elements, but of what we just
think the elements are and what our Ego now reveals with astonishment, in
fact, is just an invention of yet another treachery in your life. Therefore, the
path towards truth is nothing more than the advancement and confirmation of
false beliefs which, however, are nothing but our projection of what the truth
looks like and nothing more.
Grades are meridians of the soul, and like earthly meridians, they are
just a matter of agreement, and as it does not mean that there are visible lines
on the planet, it can be said that from the standpoint of LVX, Grades do not
exist. All the Grades of all the Aspirants together are constantly impelling
one single query, and that is: Where are you? What we truly need is an
answer to another, a more important question which is: Who are you? And
there is only one Grade which will give you a solution to this. Yes, indeed,
this is the right standpoint to everyone in our Order, and you should not spare
effort always to steer yourself in this way. Grades do not reflect the elements,
but rather the illusion of the elements. The truth awakens in Tiphareth,
therefore their truth below is just a distorted perception of some false reality.
No matter how hard you try, it will just never be enough. Whatever you do, it
will never be good. And that is precisely what we need.
Every piece of new knowledge is an old one, just vestured, and this old
knowledge is founded on our senses, and however subtle may be, they are
just a fraction of the distorted truth that we struggle for. Never underestimate
the senses; regardless of how much you think the truth is intangible, it is only
a product of electrical impulses in your brain. Right now, these words you are
reading are not in front of you as you may think, but inside your mind. You
are not looking at them, you are looking directly inside yourself, in the part of
the brain that is seeding this projection as a visual image, which is purely and
solely constructed by you. They are not letters at all; they are particles of
yourself. Your path of truth is made of lies. Any mentioning of truth is just a
word, it is a technical negation of your natural state, and that is a lie. No
matter how extensive this book is, and every other in the world, only one
advice is valid and worthy. Doubt everything and everyone. All turmoil
through history shows that the statistical number of those who reach the truth
is completely inverted to the number of those who are trying. In this lies the
painful fact that no matter how much we try to think the opposite, all our
efforts are condemned to failure from the beginning, for we have established
the whole system in false relationships and in a broken mechanism that has a
lower statistical success than pure randomness. You cannot think right,
thinking itself is wrong just because you think. The experience of
enlightenment of the one who is trying is statistically less possible than the
one who has the experience without actually wanting it at all. There is a
greater chance of enlightening someone cleaning his dishes than sitting in his
asana, and this is the first disturbance that a Probationer perceives. His
observation that things just do not work, the more the Aspirant tries, the more
he fails. Therefore, efforts are not a measure of success, or talent, nor hours
of practice. The truth is somehow closer and simpler, it lies within Genius
who gently waits for his moment, and as long as we discourage him by
various exhibits and experiments of God, he will remain silent without a
desire to expose himself. His natural habitat is darkness, although its nature is
nothing else than LVX, and the objection to this is only a matter of our wrong
perception. The nature of Genius is suchness as much as oneness, and in
darkness, there are no things, there is no unity or duality, not because they do
not exist but merely because they are not perceived. If you want to hide
things in the room, you do not have to put them all under your bed. It is quite
enough to turn off the light. This action, that movement of extinguishing the
light somehow simply forces Genius out of his environment. And then, when
your gnosis, like LVX, illuminates everything and enters everything, it will
offer you one single chance to see that Genius, fast enough before he
wriggles and disappears again. But that darkness, the supreme initiator of all
things and the creative element of the universe, that faceless root of all
creation is the A ∴ A ∴ in its very essence, and all disagreements on this
are nothing but excrements and obsessions of all our fears from all our lives
together. Therefore, LVX is the nature of the habitat in which Genius resides,
although Genius is not LVX. This is a great mistake made by many
experienced Aspirants, who identify the condition with nature. Believing that
something which is colored by blue must be blue — that something bright
must be light. The light is only a consequence of the passage of electrons
through the resistor, and as long as the particular voltage is present, light will
be manifested. However, without voltage, light will disappear; therefore the
survival of light is conditioned. Maintaining light in this way is an entirely
unnatural appearance of things that only begin to shine when the voltage is
present and what our perception defines as bright and visible. In all its
exceptionality, a clay teapot is not real; what is real is only clay. How would
a teapot ever exist without clay? A teapot is just clay formed by Genius in the
shape of a teapot. Ice does not exist; there is only water. Ice is only a
consequence of Will passing through water, transforming it into ice. It is the
same with all the other elements.
The nature of Genius is LVX, but he is not even nearly LVX. LVX is
the aggregate state of illusion and just the accompanying action of Genius,
but he has nothing to do with that light. I will be so ruthless to say that he was
raped by the light and blessed with darkness and that LVX is nothing but the
inability of our being to understand our own authentic, unique and above all,
simple nature. The flash of LVX is, therefore, a rebellion of our lower nature,
a rebellion against what Genius indeed is, in all its simplicity from the
beginning of time until this current moment. It is a rebellion of all your
beliefs against what Genius is. It is the reaction of your senses toward the
irritation of Genius. Even now, as you read this article, letter by letter, the
meaning about words and concepts comes to your mind, then about the
sentence, and then about the knowledge that is being transferred to you. The
only problem is that this transfer of thought is not intended for Genius. It is
intended for you. Genius is not in you, above you or inside you; he is
precisely in this transmission, in that state between, he arises a moment after
the perception of each of these letters, coming out as formed and embodied
knowledge. And no matter how much he looked different, he is actually the
same. He is always the same because you are always the same – again,
constantly, always the same in the everlastingly same way. The whole
concept of reincarnation is meaningless, the way it is conceived by weaker
minds, not because it does not exist, but because we are always experiencing
the same. There are no Grades, as there are no incarnations. There are no
other lives. Are they not just an excuse for our weakness to understand this
one?
What really incarnates is the present, you have read all this endlessly
many times, always reacting in the same way just as you are reacting now.
This is the same thing you are doing all the time, and while floating in that
doing, you project a false impression that this is the first time. Moreover, you
project the same impression as it is the beginning. And as you know how
these words started, you know how this book will end and where the end of
your quest is, and you already got that knowledge in what your mind just
calls tomorrow. Both yesterday and tomorrow are equally distorted
experiences of Genius as long as he refuses to experience his feelings now.
The Knowledge and Conversation is not hiding in the present, because it does
not need to hide. Instead, the present is what is hidden inside the Knowledge
and Conversation. What is curdled in that now, hushed and small, is the
A ∴ A ∴ . Your consciousness is just the resultant of all the impressions
which these words are transmitting now; moreover, it is the side effect of
discharging the force. Our Ego is like the light which occurs when electricity
passes through the resistor. Neither you, nor your Ego, nor is Genius that
resistor, even less that energy, and no matter how you set this parable, you
will not get anywhere. At this place, trying to resolve what Genius is against
what is not, would only mean making the same mistake again, all the Æons
forever.
You can determine that your whole apparatus, your system of
bloodstream is actually an open system and that it is just a part of a more
extensive process and movement in the universe, so the moment you truly
realize that you are the one conditioning the blood circulation, or who
contracts the heart muscle, that moment you will be the one who shines with
all the light from the stars. Therefore, the influence on your heart muscle is
no further from influencing the impact of a volcanic eruption, or the influence
on Jupiter's trajectory. Some young souls can ask how the problem is solved
if two Aspirants want an utterly opposite trajectory, but our answer is very
simple. In that portion of time, that is, at the moment when you directly
perceive the truth about Jupiter's trajectory, you begin to draw the knowledge
of the universe through that trajectory. And the nature of this trajectory is not
to be changed but to be followed. At that moment, if you want anything else,
you can be sure that you have not achieved what you intended and that your
mind is still on the Earth.
All the troubles in our art come from the fact that we are not able to
understand the simple thing – that every knowledge and every conversation is
the Knowledge and Conversation with the A ∴ A ∴ . Think about how
much forms it has, how many pieces of knowledge? How much A ∴ A ∴ ?
Your entire life is just one of the ways of performing one and the same
dialogue between you and your God; no, it is precisely that between.
One of the highest projections of True Nature is that it can be realized at
all. You can walk this path or not; it is a matter of your own choice. It is not
even a matter of thinking "is this my True Will"? Because, although everyone
knows that "Do What Thou Will" does not mean "Do What You Want," few
are capable of Doing what they Want, and even fewer can Do what is their
True Will. Therefore, do as it suits you. True Nature has no compromise, and
yes, it is an epithet of the elite. Do not ask me why this is so; the whole thing
resides in your personal choice. This life consists of only two extremes – the
necessity (around you) and the choice (inside you). Be free in every choice,
especially in the wrong one. Mistake freely and progress freely.
The A ∴ A ∴ is certainly not, neither will ever be a Thelemic order,
but a pan-æonic, all-pervading, omnipresent. Like cosmic void, in which
there is neither morning nor dusk, its spreading is not framed by the loom of
time nor space. Moreover, its movement is always as its nature is
everywhere. The Dawn of the New Æon will never experience its afternoon
as long as we proclaim it as New. Far too much time has passed since the
writing of the Book of the Law, all its words and verses are far too familiar,
how many of us are really aware of what our True Will is? How many of us
are aware of our own paths, how many have come to their final destinations?
How many questions without answers? And most importantly, how happy are
we? It is this question, simple and so shy that we never even ask ourselves.
How happy are we? And after all, how much do we want to be?
The A ∴ A ∴ has one thread within itself, which somehow
completely escapes from researchers over the course of all this time. It is the
idea of a constant movement and migration – the transfer of learning from
one Student to another, in endless variants and interpretations. Precisely in
the idea of migration lies the answer to many of the riddles that the
A ∴ A ∴ sets before us. Like the mercury, the A ∴ A ∴ is constantly
running away and moving from the reach of human reason whenever it
touches it, while it blazes and burns like a flame already suppressed spiritual
expectations. Perhaps our brilliant mind has projected the very idea of the
Order to simply give meaning to one centuries-old migration: simple enough
to sustain, mysterious enough to survive. Maybe not. And like a
kaleidoscope, the forms that emerge as the time passes are genuinely fantastic
and diverse – and the man is precisely the one who is the most crucial part of
the puzzle inside this whole story. His inner urge to deal with these things
and to love what is incomprehensible. To believe in volatility and to doubt on
veracity; His Will is his own Destiny, and it is convenient to think that all
fates in all the worlds are the A ∴ A ∴ .
Here, everything is needless; there is no polite behavior, gentle
manners, an exalted Superior who will say "everything is fine," there are no
twisted words, secret signs, passwords and instructions that would convey the
truth about something so simple, so obvious as the truth about yourself. And
when all around you has lost its meaning, when you reach a wall that you
think you cannot pass, when temptation pushes you into the deepest abyss of
the soul, you will be delighted. Because the face of an Angel is the easiest to
find in Hell.
Therefore, do not take yourself personally. In the night of Pan.
CHAPTER TWO
 PROBATIONER
The highest value of the A ∴ A ∴ system is that it is self-regulatory.
In a specific way, the A ∴ A ∴ is subordinated or better say adapted to
each individual, in the way that the same system is for two individuals
completely different, to the point of unrecognizability. This phenomenon is
almost imperceptible in the lower Grades, but it will be intensified as the
Aspirant progresses further. To understand this is like observing the rhyme in
a foreign language, you do not need to know what it is sung in order to
perceive that rhyme; we can hear and feel rhyme without the sense of
meaning. And both that sound and that sense are just the side effects of the
song itself. But rhyme, that sweet sound of matching voices, then gets
entirely new light, once combined with the meaning of the phrase. This
harmonious continent within the song is the program by which we follow.
Therefore, we learn this song, neither for language or culture nor because of
historical or philosophical attainment. What truly drives our souls is the God
Pan, the song of his flute takes us away from all the shores and the seas
together; our destination is somewhere far over the horizon, far behind the
great Ocean. Our aim is where we are and understanding this is our entire
search – the search for our Self.
There is no one in this world who can tell you where or what that path
is, as long as you follow your nose, you are on the right track. No system on
this planet can tell us anything about this path, simply because we all know
perfectly well that deep inside us, we really know everything. We know that
path, and we know the end of that path. And again every time we wake up we
ask ourselves over and over again where we are, instead of where we are
going. We sometimes forget our place due to our endless wanderings, and we
tend to ask this question out of melancholy, remembering all beings and Gods
we met till now, some of them long gone, many of them never to meet again.
Therefore, we ask where we are, sometimes from that natural childlike desire
that comes from depths, to wake up at the place where we were yesterday, in
the life and the body which we had when we were truly happy. This day is
not yesterday, as tomorrow we will not be where we are now. That urge
which puts us on the path, even more, which defines that path, is a mystery of
the highest order. That urge is the A ∴ A ∴ in its pure light, although we
will never have the courage to say whether it is a consequence or justification
of the path. This instinct that drives us, like the acid that bites our feet when
staying in the same place just a moment longer, the instinct which forces us
and pushes us further, so much further, is the magnificent reward of a
Probationer and the value of our entire Order; all the Grades together are not
worthy of one single day of Probationer’s temptation. The Superior must
respect every moment of each Probation, for he will see in that what he has
already seen from the first day of his own temptation until the final
attainment of his current Grade. The sensation about movement, the feeling
that you are on your way, that you have gone, the unmistakable impression
that something is changing, that everything is changing, the thought that you
are becoming mad, that you cannot go further into your Probation. The
thought that you will fail. All this tells you one a certain thing: that you are
on the right trail.
For the worst thing which can happen to the Probationer is that nothing
happens. By signing the Oath, you have initiated one mechanism which in its
own complexity does not have one simple command. The command to be
recalled. For the Probationer, nothing will be the same again, not because the
Universe is changing, but because he will change. That change is that path we
have mentioned. The Probationer observes that everything is in the move; the
universe reveals to him hidden areas and thousands of splendorous realms.
But the truth is quite different. He is the one who changes, as he is the one
who moves the universe with that change. This mechanism is conditional,
and it is impossible to separate one process from the other, for it is quite the
same thing. Changing yourself is impossible without changing everything
else, like gears in a clock mechanism; you will never be able to say with
certainty which gear has triggered the whole thing. For the moment you move
one, all the other will move instantly. Now, if you move another, the whole
device reacts in the same way, running all the others identically. Your
illusion is that you are moving the gear, and your hand and all gears in the
clock and your will to move that one gear is just a part of the same
mechanism. And just like this one gear could not move the other without
your hand, that the second gear pushes the first one through you, now making
the whole of you as the third gear and a part of such exalted scheme.
The A ∴ A ∴ is that mechanism; you cannot move any gear if you
have not been moved by the other one, previously. After all, your will for
moving is just a consequence of that same mechanism which affects you
much earlier, through some other gear and some other consciousness.
The only factor that can hold the wheel in this madness is the Superior,
only he can align the system with the Student in such a way that he will
easily overcome any crisis and misunderstanding, once he finds himself long
to be lost. It is precisely this reason that makes the A ∴ A ∴ a living
organism, which not only gives but takes, which does not seek but require
from an individual to completely surrender himself and all from his life,
which enters into all things and in all aspects of the Aspirant's work, until his
mind is occupied so much that it starts to operate automatically. Only in this
way, the A ∴ A ∴ system begins to shine with its proper brilliance, and we
can conclude that until this does not happen, the Aspirant cannot bound
himself as a part of the A ∴ A ∴ , rather as a stimulus and nothing more, or
even a mist in that magnificent and shapeless fire.
Before we look at the Probationer’s temptation more specifically, it
would not be a waste of time to consider what he is tempted to? The
Probationer differs from the common dweller of this ordinary world in only
one thing. His virtues and powers are no greater than his neighbor’s, yet he
possesses something that will forcefully persuade his life to an utterly
unexpected route. His will for change and his Oath which he gave. And as
time which allows for seamless corrosion of iron, it is the same time which
now affects him like the worst poison. Just a day before giving of the Oath,
he was another lost soul on this plane, ready to obey to the laws of the earth
and not to feel anything from what the Probationer so unbearably suffers in
his soul. Soon, everybody will recognize him as a criminal, murderer,
maniac, pervert, lunatic and worshiper of the devil, only because he
consciously refused to go along their path. And instead of that, he chooses
another way. His way.
Going in line with nature is quite an awkward expression since nobody
says whose nature. A man is often withdrawn and provoked by authority,
external influences, society, and family, and therefore his path is often
everything but his own. But to go your own way is the talent above all
talents, and more than anything else it is the highest pressure the Aspirant
takes on himself. Therefore, the Probationer feels an urge to return to his
dormant kingdom; precisely there lies the essence of this Grade – to hold on,
which takes only time and nothing else. It is the first projection and pressure
of Binah which, from the moment of giving the Oath of the Probationer until
the moment of entering the City of the Pyramids, becomes the most persistent
companion of the Aspirant – the most faithful and painful. Binah’s projection
will change its attribute during the Aspirant’s progression through the
Grades, change completely its form and the intensity of interference in the
life of the Aspirant to the extent that he will be convinced that Binah's
pressure is nothing else but the A ∴ A ∴ . Which, in fact, is not far from the
truth.
If the Aspirant looks closer at the Tree of Life, he will notice that
Binah's influence is quite far away; so far beyond the Abyss, behind the
golden Tiphareth, that he may think that the action of Binah can be compared
to the influence of a distant star upon an ocean’s tide. However, this influence
is more direct and insidious projected through the 32nd Path of “Universe”,
the first path to which the Neophyte enters, and it is assigned by two
attributes. Namely, each Path on the Tree of Life receives the influence of the
archetype which manifests through the specific sphere. Our Ego then
classifies and infuses this influence as elementary, planetary or zodiacal in
nature, at the same time using the action of classification as an excuse to
plant the seed of control. Only the 32nd path of “Universe,” along with the 31st
path of “Æon”, has a double attribution, that is, two ideas simultaneously
expressing through one archetype – which is otherwise the feature of all other
Paths on the Tree of Life. Precisely this path, besides the element of the earth,
has the attribute of Saturn, through which Binah strikes at the Probationer, so
powerfully and lowly.
The Probationer has and will always have one single task in all
circumstances – to persist. But in what should he be persisting? There is
plenty of discussions about the Probationer’s Grade; it would be frivolous to
call one claim more or less correct than the other, but everyone agrees that
the Probationer begins with his daily practice and carefully keeps a diary
about it. We will return to this especially afterward because the topic is of
such great importance for our work. What is the essence of the Probationer’s
Grade? Some achievement that is expected of him? Some kind of quest he
has to do? No. Only time is needed, and in this form, Binah appears and
opposes him, therefore, that temptation is sufficient enough for him to pass
further. His perseverance on the path merely delays encounter with Binah's
projections, later to be awoken again and known as the temptation of a
Neophyte, which could be terrible and black as hell.
The Probationer has one obligation, and that is to work. He chooses one
practice by his affinities and this practice he does daily to the end of his
Probation, which will be one year. The choice of practice is not as important
as the essential adherence in everyday performance but also written
recordings both of the achieved results and everything that makes the
Probationer’s life during this one year. There are no qualitative assessments
in this, and at the cost of consecutive failures, he must sacrifice even
absolute, but casual successes. And yet if he experiences the Knowledge and
Conversation in one day, it will be recorded as a failure if he does not Know
nor Talked throughout the whole year of his Probation. There is absolutely no
point to work every fifth day for 10 hours, regarding the benefit of daily work
with only 5 minutes’ duration, and the whole role of the Superior is in the
insistence on this principle. What is being sought as the real intent is
saturation. The apparatus of a student's mind in repetitions finds
transcendence, and this is an attitude that is exceedingly well used by the
Zelator in his advancement, especially in practicing Yoga.
There are only two essential methods within the magical work, and all
practices in all worlds can be categorized under one of these two diametric
approaches. The first one is “invoke often,” while the other would be
“inflame yourself with prayer.” While this other is more closely related to an
Adept and Bhakti, the first one refers to the Probationer. “Invoke often” is a
motto that excludes quality at first glance; therefore, it is suitable for work
which requires a gradual boiling of the entire operation, such as an
alchemical act for example, in which quantity of consumed time invested in
operation changes the quality of the substances. The Probationer “invokes
often”, without glow, without desire, without passion for the result. His only
passion is the Great Work itself, which is so far from him and in which he
does not possess any Knowledge. Because craving and desire provoke
obsession, the one that so violently destroys the Neophyte, which we will
discuss later on more.
Therefore, the Probationer performs one practice, regardless which one,
irrelevant how, irrelevant why. What is important is only when and how
often. It is precisely in this absurd quantitative advancement that lies the key
of imperceptible dissolution of his nature, in a way that it refuses to recognize
that his immune system is attacked and that it is impossible to produce
antibodies. The daily performance of his practice is a disease in the same way
as the counting of days of his Probation, it is disgusting ulcer which spreads
through the organism, it is a progression of the disease which cannot be
observed. Our internal being says that everything is fine, that everything is
only apparent and transient, until the moment our cross conceives the rose. In
this holy work, statics cause dynamics, pressure causes an explosion. Pleasant
Probation does not exist; in this case, it would show either that something is
terribly wrong or that it is a case of the remarkably advanced Aspirant.
Comfortable Probation does not bring anything worthy, and after a few
months, if all goes well, the first signs of change can be identified.
There are usually three periods of Probation, such as a standard school
composition, that has an introduction, elaboration, and conclusion. However,
although true works of art are not subject to generalization, some common
indications can be noticed. The first period is framed by happiness and pure
joy. Enthusiasm flows into the being of the Probationer, everything is so
magical and peaceful, full of divine beauty and all what is being done is done
with ease. Progress is visible daily, and the Angel almost knocks on the door.
Depending on the eagerness of the Probationer, the brilliance of his mind and
his predestination in our art, the time comes when the dark clouds will
conceal him. The negative transfer starts to rise, and he will begin to doubt
himself, his work and his Superior. Precisely from this tendency to deny the
Superior, he sees and feels within him what he sees and feels for himself, he
sees in him the source of all suffering and all the evil of this world. The
Superior becomes guilty for bad practices that are getting more boring and
unsound with each new day. He is guilty of poor understanding of mysteries;
his relationship becomes a reflection of the Superior’s complex of lower
value. “He is so insolent and rude, always harassing me, I am so alone and
poor. Where is my Angel, why did he even assign this lunatic to be my
teacher? Just what does he look like when he got projected in such a moral
gnome I call the Superior? The Superior? How stupid it sounds to call
someone who is not worth to even say hello in the street. The Superior? Well,
he is surely not the Superior, he could only be Inferior. How many years he is
in the Order, yet his Grade is so low. Well, if I've been on the path for so
long, I would be at least Adeptus Minor. I will call him tomorrow and tell him
everything straight; I will not bypass this, he will get everything directly in
his face, I will shoot it right into the center!”
It can be said that if this second period did not come, there was, in fact,
no real Probation. Certainly, this does not mean that the Probationer shall not
pass validly, of course. On the other hand, we can assume that the complete
misery of this period merely changes the form of manifestation and that all
other forms are in fact variation of only one process which is: loss of self-
confidence. There are only three main positions of the Aspirant which differ
from the type of his basic neurosis. At this point, we can widely accept the
fact that psychoanalysis is one of the essential tools in the hands of every
Aspirant, and especially for the Probationer. The first position is the basic
one, and in my opinion, it is the mother of all causes, which is fear. The
second position is sadness, while the third is anger or hate. But we indeed
realize that each of these positions is the same in complexity and equally
natural reaction of our being to something so sublime as opening the door of
paradise. All three positions are similarly useful weapons of the Ego, whom
the Aspirant primarily perceives as an enemy, not because he is, but because
we are deeply cursed, in this ongoing and fictive war against ourselves;
miserable war, without light, without love. The enemy, therefore, knows how
to withdraw, to hide, to conspire, to plot, all of the deceptions that will give
us an excuse for self-preservation in our own defense mechanism. Yet not
against the enemy, but in front of oneself. Therefore, the Aspirant will
progress further in hatred, sadness, and fear, while the primary position
cannot be assumed in advance. Even if by any chance it could be assumed, I
would personally never recommend it as it would, even more, empower
defense mechanism. In that second period of Probation, once the Aspirant
seizes the position that, in fact, is a spin of his Ego, one of the two leading
roles takes over. It is an introvert or an extrovert role, that is, depressive or
militant. From the study of earlier cases, we have come to an interesting
observation that militant roles are much more difficult to overcome during
Probation period than depressive ones, although at first glance we may
assume the opposite. It seems that this militant, warlike role is predisposed to
an explosion in those more desperate and lonely minds; this role appears to
be so liberating on the psyche of the Aspirant, even to liberate him from his
own aspiration. And finally, instead of finding himself firmly on the ground
of Malkuth as a realized Neophyte, he now wanders forever as a fierce fighter
for human rights, making a bulletproof armor around him.
 Even if the Aspirant endures through Probation, this position is
undeniably determined for failure in the period of the Neophyte, when a
strong stream of sexuality mixed with an aggressive, warlike position acts
like a hurricane to the vulnerable soul of the Aspirant. On the other hand, the
second, a more peaceful position but only apparently, gives more chances to
the Probationer, but it is difficult to expect anything more than the Zelator, or
even the Philosophus in some rare cases. The depressive role seems to create
an ideal condition for the alchemical experiment, but unfortunately with an
utterly false substance. And instead of mild temperature ideally transforming
the quality of the matter, the depressing role now cools that same fire which
obstructs Aspirant's enthusiasm; he begins to condemn himself in what he has
not been intended to succeed in the first place. Shame or guilt is just one of
the projections that will push the depressive role to complete failure. This
position is more easily passing through the Probation, but only because it is
being assimilated with suspension and latency. In that case, one year of
Probation last differently than usual, and the Aspirant only begins to receive
insights and breakthroughs afterward, but Binah is already in its full force: as
the master of the matter and the eruption of hidden sexuality. Physical defects
and imbalances in the Neophyte create a round for the hell itself. In this case,
only the acceptance that he must pass the same way back for the true
assimilation of past experiences will be enough, once again, he will touch the
earthly principle, but this time clean and prepared for the Great Work.
In short, the Aspirant embarks on a journey, and the only thing that he
carries is water and bread. In the first position, he is so hurrying that all the
water spills. In the second position, he is so slow that all the bread becomes
rotten. In both cases, he will die, either from hunger or thirst. This may be a
real picture of what is happening, and in both cases, the Aspirant can do
nothing else but to turn back. Which is of course impossible.
Finally, the third period is like screening the sun after a stormy demonic
night. It is a day worth living, and there are no words to show the Aspirant
the true meaning of that joy and excitement when he passes further. Although
this third, and the last period of the Probationer is, in the same place, the
rising of the Neophyte, yet one more act is missing. One qualitative leap that
will detach him from his whole Probation. He needs his passage through the
Ritual of the Pyramid. This jump of faith into something utterly different
from everything that he has done so far, the Probationer will project within
himself in millions of different ways, in so many ways that it is a too an
extensive topic for this book. What is expected is that he awakes on the other
side of the ritual; to wake up the next day, knowing that he passed the ritual
through the fact that he did it, not that he did it because he passed through it.
For everything that he had to pass, he passed long before Liber Pyramidos,
and that is the whole meaning of Probation. All past and future times, all of
them are before his Pyramid, for only eternal now is left inside. We will have
a chance to discuss more the phenomenon of Liber Pyramidos; along with
Liber Cadaveris and Liber Samekh, this is all that one will ever need.
Although a lot is already known about the methodology of work, there
is little original and clearly stated about the ways of performance. At the very
beginning, the Probationer is encouraged to scrabble all that blurred area
which he knows as Curriculum or program of his Grade, as he will be thrown
into the fire; in every way, in all aspects, as much as the Superior feels it is
possible. This fire is by no means an aggressive, militant creation, the one
that feeds by the Probationer's fear and weaknesses. This fire must be
purifying, for it is a warm morning breeze that softly announces burning,
afternoon sun-god. It does not serve for hardening the weapon but just for
slightly boiling the fate, that fate which will yet have its chance to rise or to
annihilate. For the Probationer indeed can do everything, it is just a question
of how much of everything he can handle.
At this point, Superior's task is to sting and provoke, as Probationer's is
to persist. Everything should be a provocation for the Superior; for the
Probationer, everything must be a game. In this way unified, these two
segments make a winning combination, only in this way program goes
without the tremendous and unnecessary sacrifice from the Probationer. We
have already said that the Probationer has only one true goal, and that is to go
his own way. Which does not mean he will get anywhere. It is the emphasis
on his, and not on the way, therefore, the authenticity of choice is on a higher
level than the choice itself.
Furthermore, it is necessary to say something about individuals who are
self-initiated in our Order without the guidance of the Superior, many
discussions are leading to whether their Initiation is valid or not. Our stand is
that Initiation is pointless without touching the aim; as the Knowledge and
Conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel is the ultimate destination of the
outer Order, everything beyond that is mere bureaucracy blinded by
spirituality. I know a significant number of individuals who have achieved
the Knowledge and Conversation without any formal affiliation to the Order,
and even more those who, within their legitimate and recognized lineages,
have not achieved even a mumble of that Talk. Until the Knowledge and
Conversation is achieved, we are nothing but blind animals driven by
instincts of hunger and survival of the species, and every tale of Initiation is
empty and sad. The Superior is, therefore, the Student’s witness, the witness
of the living consecration of LVX. But as long as there is an uncompromising
tendency towards the light, the witness is redundant. Far from being
worthless, but each of us must understand Initiation as a process that is not
subject to any established rules. And if we look closely through history, the
only similarity of all the great journeys is that they were all a resultant of a
pure heart and a strong mind. Every worthy Initiation has the mark of
willingness to go to the end at all costs. Unfortunately, most of the Initiations
today have not moved any further from the beginning, and their value is
mainly expressed exclusively in the amount of the fee. Initiation is not
obtained, Initiation is requested. It is not there to concede, to lease, rent or
sell. Initiation is demanded. And at the point when you lose yourself and
everything that you are in that quest, Initiation finds and takes you by force.
It will not ask nor seek permits. Yet by then, you will already be so changed,
that nothing will be left to Initiate.
Moving through the Grades for some will be a search, for others a slight
recall, for some third hell of the worst karmic repayment. Every Aspirant
within what we call incarnation has its one natural habitat and a sphere in
which he smoothly resides. There is always one Grade through which the
Aspirant simply flies, without any effort. The issue the Superior needs to deal
with is whether he will allow it; that is, will he use this talent of the Aspirant
to deepen the Grade to the extreme, asking the talent to be compensated by
increasing the criteria, or will he use a talent to make the Student enter the
next Grade more rapidly? It certainly depends on the Superior, although he
always has to think in accordance with his Grade and nothing else; only in
this way will the circle be closed, and the A ∴ A ∴ principle fully realized.
Unlike the other Grades, all the emotional stirring that the Probationer
feels does not come from poorly implemented practices. In fact, the practices
of the Probationer, no matter how exalted, serve only one purpose – for the
mental stress and the feeling of testing to accelerate even further. He cannot
fail even if he wants, and more, the quality of his work is not what is valuable
for us at all. It is essential that he continually works, attacking his usual way
of functioning with meaningless repetitions. And as long as these repetitions
are constant, as long as he is doing them all the time and always, it is
irrelevant what he is doing and how he performs. The practice does not serve
the Probationer for any achievement, but for the attack, above all on his
thinking apparatus, which in this way acts as leverage of his Ego to move it
from the usual pedestal in which it is fixed by inertia. In a large number of
cases, whenever the Probationer has a sense of comfort, it can be said with
great certainty that the whole process is poorly placed, which in no way
means that his Probation is wrong. Poor Probation is an absurd expression,
and our nature will always find a way to get the maximum even from the
worst circumstances. There is no proper or improper Probation, unlike the
appropriate or inappropriate Probationer. The process of finding the ideal
Superior also seems to be condemned entirely to failure; the A ∴ A ∴
mechanism will secure everything to make the best possible Probation from
the worst Superior and the worst Probationer. The question is what would
happen then, but we do not need to spend too many thoughts on this subject.
Let the only measure be the feeling that something is happening and nothing
more. The tasks of the Superior and the Probationer are clearly and precisely
defined, and there is no place for speculation, except in some special cases of
Dominus Liminis. This one Grade, which is not a Grade in a true sense of the
word, is destined for recapitulation and an extreme intensification of
temperature; therefore the burden of this speculation is, in fact, the ideal fuel
for this process. In the end, the higher temperature is achieved, the better it is
for everyone, for something that the Aspirant's mind cannot assume even in
his most abstract models of thinking will soon happen.
Much can be said about the affiliation between the Student and the
Superior, and as equally the Student and the Superior have the attribute of
their Grades, so their relationship will be the refraction of those crossed
forces. Although variants are almost infinite, some general analogies can be
drawn. Thus, the relationship between the Probationer and the Neophyte can
escalate into fear, stiffness, or even perversion of the fatal kind, while the
relationship between the Probationer and the Practicus can be distorted and
boring to the frontiers of the understandable universe. To the Zelator, the
Practicus can be an insult to intelligence in certain circumstances, while the
Neophyte can find seeds of idolatry and adoration in the Philosophus. What
can draw particular attention is the influence of the time to the moment of
giving the Oath; that is to say, a Probationer who took the Oath in the sign of
Scorpio can behave entirely differently from the one who did the same during
Cancer or Leo.
Each Aspirant should think about this, as much as it is necessary to
overcome the possible crisis that he has, realizing that it is just a natural
phenomenon which must be followed with attention, from its formation to its
end. Each Grade, especially the Probationer, is one observation, equally of
itself and the environment, and all wisdom is knowing that between these two
there is no difference. The difference is only in the experience of that
between; our Ego creates an illusion of the Grades because it is the only way
he can comprehend itself – as variation and form of that difference. In the
same way that each Superior must understand everything that is proceeding
in the soul of the Probationer, and understand the exact reasons for each of
his actions and decisions, so the Probationer must know that the Superior has
his own course and the task of his Grade as well. He must express attention
and goodwill toward the Superior as much as the Superior returns in the same
manner. The nature of their relationship is the commiseration as much as
companionship, and not fraternity in the usual sense of the word.
This is an excellent occasion to note what happens not only to
Probationers but to all the other Aspirants within the Golden Dawn, which is
the sense of the weight of the Grade that the Student projects into rational
contrivance and paranoid thinking. At any moment, whenever he goes
through a tough period, let him think of the next instruction given by the
Order:

Let him be mindful that the word Probationer is no idle term, but that the Brothers
will in many a subtle way 'prove' him, when he knoweth it not.

Always and continually, the Aspirant should look at every circumstance

of his Probation as a specific dialogue between him and his Angel. He will
indeed later realize that his entire Probation is actually a synopsis of
everything that will continue to happen to him and that his whole transition
through the Golden Dawn will be summarized inside one year of his
Probation. In one fantastic way, his mind will construct everything from that
one year; the experiences of the Neophyte, Zelator, Practicus, Philosophus,
Dominus Liminis, even the Great Work itself. Therefore, it is the essence to
perceive that all the Grades have already passed and been lived through the
passage of Probation. Everything forthcoming in our Order serves only in a
way to live that one year over and over again, every time more conscious and
firm, to the moment when the Aspirant receives Vision and hears the Voice.
Everything inside our Order lasts one year. Every Probation, every second,
all Æons and all Grades, last only one year; there is nothing above or wider
than that one year. And that one year is only one thing, as every occurrence is
one and the same Probation, one mystery which the Aspirant deals inside his
Pyramid.
It is never too often to stress: the Superior’s task is not to make the
Probationer passes. It is the task of the Probationer. What the Superior needs
to do with his work is just to separate the suitable from unsuitable ones.
Occasionally, there will be those who are simply not fitting. Despite their
hard work and a pure heart, the Probation will be too much for some, and
they will make that worst choice in the whole work, which is to give up. Only
in this case, the Superior really can do nothing. Once a conscious and formal
withdrawal has been made, it cannot be compensated in any way. There are
various instructions on what can be done with the one who has given up.
After some months or even years, the Aspirant could return with a desire to
work again. It is my opinion that we should not be too rigid about this,
although it is a full right of the Superior to deny. However, in the deepest part
of my soul, I feel that there is nothing more glorious than to tell someone
“come, I love you.” Being a star does not mean we all have the same shine.
There are conscious and mature stars, but there are also those young and
childish, which will grow and glint when our shining fades, and these stars
should be given the opportunity to go forward. As long as it is forward, and
only forward as a pure motive, I will agree to a compromise. And as long as
love is an essential impeller, I will always say yes. How often have we all
fallen and how much should we stay in the mud if there were not friendly
hands and support, someone's warm embrace that infuses the motivation to
continue? Not a single fall of the Probationer is natural; after all, Probation is
given to pass, not to fail. The purpose of the exam is above all to learn, not to
dismiss.
Disguised as a beggar, the great Odysseus was patiently enduring
suitors' abuse. He uttered words which the Probationer will sense perfectly:
“Still, my heart, for you have suffered heavier things”. Secretly knowing that,
when the time comes, he will kill every one of them. Even in the book
Hagakure, we can find something about this matter. It says: “If there is
something that points to what an individual does well, the only important
thing is: let him endure suffering, without exception.” Still, we must add that
such temptations have nothing to do with the suffering of the old age; joy in
the expectation of the sun birth at dawn is as real as distant, the Probationer
must know that the nature of the universe is in his advancement and nothing
less.
The Probationer is an uncut gemstone of the A ∴ A ∴ which will
never become a valuable sapphire, or a brilliant. The core of the entire
Superior’s work lies in this intactness. His job is not to abrade that
magnificent stone, on the contrary. He is there to taint it so much that he can
redeem it cheaply, on the market of gods and stars. And then to put it on the
altar in the most hidden part of the Temple. I do not care if you succeed; I
care for you to attempt. And as long as you try, it will mean you are failing.
And little by little, from your attempts you will become successful which I
am not interested in, as I said. The moment the Student fully understands the
role of the Superior, he would Know and Talk with his Holy Guardian Angel.
Therefore, the role of the Superior is always condemned to deception, he is
either overestimated or underestimated; the real understanding of the
Superior would signify that the Aspirant achieved much higher Grades.
The Superior is not a guru, as the Student is not a brat. The Superior is a
man of flesh and blood; he is an accomplice in the crime, not a hidden plotter
who will do everything to get the blame on the Student. The Student is of that
same flesh and blood, the same which has brought the Superior to where he is
now, yet different enough to bring the Student somewhere else. The Student
should understand that the Universe will hunt him like a hound if it senses
fear or insecurity inside him. And when the black clouds overwhelm him, and
all the work seems so absurd and full of suffering, when only moments are
stopping him from tearing his Oath, then one instruction from the Superior
will be enough for him to understand finally. That no one will gather the stars
for him. He is the star himself.
CHAPTER THREE
 SUPERIOR
The finest jewel within our Order is the connection between the Student
and his Superior. In this relationship is the basis of the whole of our system;
although it possesses a note that is primarily reflected in the maxim “with the
method of Science to attain the aim of Religion,” it lies in something much
more intimately and simpler – in the connection between two beings that are
trying to reach the same goal with joined forces. In the most humane and
inspired way, complementing themselves instead of deducting, they advance
through the path traveling on their own, yet traveling together. The one which
is suitable connects with the other that is suitable, the one that is not suitable
is separated from the suitable one, and that is a mechanism which has been
around from the beginning. For the Superior, it is unfortunate and necessary
to say more about what he is not, instead of what he is, the fact that the
human soul has made perfect defense mechanisms over many years, which
will make from the Superior what is the cruelest for us – an excuse for our
own failure.
Teaching is the best way of learning. This is such an important
observation from all that has to be said about the concept of the Superior that
I find to be the most valuable insight of all. Its magnificence lies in practical
analogy and is fully understood only by those who accept Superior's role.
Aspirants who took an Oath of the Neophyte and further, can roughly be
divided into two groups. Those who work with Students and those who are
still working alone. And at the very beginning, we will perceive that there are
two main groups of people in our business; those who are turned inwards and
those who are turned outwards. Although the role of the Superior reminds us
of Bodhisattva's vow, it has a slightly different nature. The Superior is just a
part of the chain, and by pushing others, he pushes himself. Moreover, by
pushing himself, he moves others, and with the awakening of True Will, this
mechanism acquires a completely transcendental meaning. It can be said that
it is possible to talk about the Superior in the true sense of the word only at
the Grade of Adeptus Major. Teaching is the best way of learning.
The role of the Superior is to be a fellow sufferer, a wandering
companion, a witness of the sacred act of the Oath which the Student
undertake, becoming the driving force in the Aspirant's mind, by no means as
a creative potential which is exclusively and always an Aspirant. It can be
said that the roles of the Student and the Superior are equally crucial to each
other. It is difficult to think that the achievement of the Superior is complete
if there is no Student to take his place. All these claims have a stronghold
exclusively in the mind of the Aspirant, to speak of their principled truths is
equally vain as to talk about the reason for giving the Oath of a Probationer.
There is nothing to lose, and everything to gain. It is the A ∴ A ∴ , a map
that reveals a treasure by following the signs. Its greatness lies in the fact that
it is more significant treasure than it ever could have been shown on the map;
the number of those who have gone for this adventure is great as the ocean,
while the number of those who have failed is greater than the treasure itself.
That is why the A ∴ A ∴ is a living organism, it is worth dying and living
for, once the Oath is given and the Initiation took place, not a single life is
worth more than the goal, and every further living is futile without the
A ∴ A ∴ . It is a mechanism that poisons the human mind as the worst
poison; once inflicted by the truth, painful or by those of brilliant LVX, the
human being will never be the same again precisely because it becomes
human, in the full sense of this divine word.
The relationship between the Student and the Superior does not
represent teaching, but rather associating, like an attempt to explain the smell
of a rose when the Student has never smelled anything of that kind before.
So, how to do that? How to suggest the scent of these beautiful roses from the
garden? Why are they so beautiful if it is not a visual idea at all? How does a
rose smell, describe it by words? By giving him a suggestion that they smell
like what? Is every attempt to do so equally wrong, diverging him more from
the goal? The relation between the Student and the Superior is, therefore, the
art of association, not transmission or teaching. There is nothing to teach
what is not already known. Instead, the Superior remains only to show to the
Student the ideal place where he could maybe find a rose for himself. Only he
must pick up and smell that rose. And when the Superior asks him what he
experienced, the Student will express that he met the Angel. The Angel will
not be in the rose, on the contrary. He will be hidden in the smell; the rose
will serve only as a pointer. And finally, if the Student further attempts to
describe what this scent is like, he will again encounter the resistance of the
Universe to understand what he is describing.
 Learning to ride a bicycle somehow describes this condition, where the
one who teaches only gently holds the device from behind, and the one who
learns firmly believes that the one who teaches will prevent a fall. And as he
turns the pedals in that firm conviction, the one who is teaching has long
ceased to hold him; the happiness which follows the discovery that the whole
thing is going by itself is one of the brightest moments in human life.
The Student already knows everything, as the Superior has already
transmitted everything. Both of them only serve as the mechanism of this
transmission and are equally fake by themselves. There is nothing to learn, as
there is nothing to transfer. A complete mechanism within the A ∴ A ∴ is
based on awakening and awareness; of course, there are learning processes
on the side, but they are not, nor will they ever be a condition for
enlightenment. By the very fact that he was born, each Aspirant is assured in
two ultimate accomplishments:

a) Knowledge and Conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel; and

b) Crossing the Abyss.

When a new park is being built in the United Kingdom, designing an

ideal walking path represents art, but also a serious and responsible venture.
But they have found a way which perfectly shows where the path should be
bricked. At first, they plant grass everywhere without a single mark, letting
the people walk their own way. After one season, where the highest number
of stamped traces can be found and where the grass is most embedded, there
they simply set the marked path. The Superior is not there to make the path
for the Student; he is there only to pave what the Student has already crossed,
reminding him of the length of that path, once the Student tiredly turns back.
Perhaps one of the most brilliant examples of the relationship between
the Superior and his Student, in a realistic, most humane way, is shown in the
motion picture “Zorba the Greek”. Not at any other place could I find such a
sincere and simple, deeply spiritual grip between hands of two men who are
bounded not by their fate but by their freedom and unconditional love. Their
dance is nothing more than the dance of Pan; it is a true adjective and nature
of the relationship between the Superior and the Student in the A ∴ A ∴ .
Too often and with regret I can hear expressions such as: “Did you take
him for a Student?” Or even worse: “Did you accept him for a Student?” That
is an entirely misleading reference to the nature of our Order. The Superior
has no more right to accept the Student then the right to seek further progress.
It is neither up to him, nor up to his assessment if he will admit the Student.
He can clearly refuse, but then this is not a process of thinking and weighing,
but pure will. He will just say no. No – such a beautiful and rare word.
Instead, to produce a period of thinking, reconsideration, delay and
expectation in a candidate? For God's sake, he is not a candidate, the Student
is a star that is awakening, he is the one whole Universe that is being created,
and we want to put things in place. We are the witnesses, we almost do not
have a role at all, and refusal to act in that way is a strict violation of the
principles that are so characteristic for the A ∴ A ∴ . It is up to the Student
to express goodwill, the Superior only channels further, and there is nothing
else that would better describe the situation.
There are not enough words to suggest that the Superior must
understand the diversity of natures and paths of his Students in every way.
And he should treat each one like he would treat his own God. There are so
many different ways of expressing our neuroses, but of course, they are all
one same pattern. He has to understand that the variety of experiences and
characters are just feather ornaments of his own Angel, and instead of
mocking it, he must admire that creation, every day, every time, constantly,
asking himself only one question: “What kind of message is conveying right
to me, right here?” There are two types of Aspirants, roughly speaking.
Those who leave the best bite for the end and those who swallow this bite
immediately at the beginning. There is no way to declare in advance what is
better or more proper unless beforehand one completely understands the
nature of the individual. Many of us seek to isolate, while for some silence
kills to the point that they cannot fall asleep without the television being
turned on. Understanding is the true key to this whole process; only the
understanding of others leads to peace with ourselves.
No Superior who walks on this earth has the right to refuse Student's
progress but instead has an inexpressible obligation to enable him advancing
to the next Grade. Everyone has its own natural cycle, the ideal time for
maturation and germination, and the Superior must find the balance between
the mandatory program and Student's actual abilities. The perfect time of
germination; for he must not destroy it, he must not spoil the ideal harvest
time. How? By continually building self-confidence inside the Student. There
is one thing, also, of which we must be aware; it is about the essential
principle of the A ∴ A ∴ which is to select those who are fit and eliminate
the unfit. Each Aspirant has one Grade through which he passes easily and
one in which he will languish. And here we have two different approaches.
The one that forces the talent and the one which is forcing the defect.
Sometimes the perfection of mastering one of the Grades is utterly different
from the perfection of mastering the other, and the Superior needs to decide
what he will evaluate from the Student, and in what way. The big question is
whether maintaining a constant inhale for more than two minutes is a virtue
for someone who is a professional diver? Or is sitting in Asana hopeless
impediment for the one with arthritis? Although it has already been stated
very clearly, each Superior, taking primarily his experience as a measure,
should give judgment on this. In our books we find the following:

Every Member of the A ∴ A ∴ must be armed at all points, and expert with every
weapon. The examinations in every Grade are strict and severe; no loose or vague
answers are accepted. In intellectual questions, the candidate must display no less
mastery of his subject than if he were entered in the “final” for Doctor of Science or
Law at a first class University.

The natural talents of individual differ very widely. The late Sir Richard Jebb, one of
the greatest classical scholars of modern times, was so inferior to the average
mediocrity in mathematics, that despite repeated efforts he could not pass the “little
go” at Cambridge — which the dullest minds can usually do. He was so deeply
esteemed for his classics that a special “Grace” was placeted so as to admit him to
matriculation. Similarly a brilliant Exorcist might be an incompetent Diviner. In such
a case the A ∴ A ∴ would refuse to swerve from Its system; the Aspirant would be
compelled to remain at the Barrier until he succeeded in breaking it down, though a
new incarnation was necessary to permit him to do so. But no technical failure of any
kind soever could necessarily prevent him from accomplishing the Two Critical
Tasks, since the fact of his incarnation itself proves that he has taken the Oath which
entitled him to attain to the Knowledge and Conversation of his Holy Guardian Angel,
and the annihilation of this Ego. One might therefore be an Adeptus Minor or even a
Magister Templi, in essence, though refused official recognition by the A ∴ A ∴ as
a Zelator owing to (say) a nervous defect which prevented him from acquiring a
Posture which was “steady and easy” as required by the Task of that grade.[2]

The poison of the worst kind is that the Superior chooses the practice
which the Probationer will perform during his one year, or even to have the
slightest influence on it. Apart from the fact that the Probationer is still too
weak to feel what the right choice is for him, Superior's inexperience in
leading his Student may further complicate this. Therefore, the Superior, in
this case, can be nothing more than a testifier of Probationer's diary, Oath,
and the task. He is the one and nobody else who will put a sign on the
Neophyte's Oath and so unequivocally show that the Probationer has passed
further, only he will be the one who will recognize attainment of his Student,
and see in him what he saw in self, so long ago when he was passing the
same steps. Therefore, if the Superior imposes what he thinks the Probationer
should practice, then it will only be served as a revival of Superior's path,
instead of Student's will.
It can be said that the selection of practice is an indication of
Probationer's character, and with that in mind, it is essential to work on
theory and recommended literature. Prior to Probationer's Grade, there is also
a “Student of Mystery” Grade based precisely on acquaintance with extensive
literature, so that the choice of practice would be left entirely to free and open
affinity. Some branches of our Order apply this rule, some not, therefore it is
up to the Superior to decide on this subject. Getting familiar with Student's
affections, talents and drawbacks is a vital polygon for each Superior,
precisely because it is what he draws endless energy for Student’s temptation
from. It should be remembered that there is not enough good exercise that
will retain its passion and freshness during the one year of constant
repetitions. Therefore, the emphasis should be put on the Probationer to
choose whatever he likes; the Superior should support his decision by his
authority and benevolent advice, without any appeals or conditions.
Probationer’s practice is not limited to rituals, but should also refer to
meditations and various contemplations of any kind, those of Western as well
as Eastern spiritual tradition. Philosophical, religious, or pure physical
exercises should also be taken into consideration. The practice should not be
changed during Probation, but then again it does not mean that it is forbidden.
Here, everything is possible, and nothing is certain, therefore all
interpretations of the rules are in the hands of the Superior. It can be
concluded that the impact on Student's mind is inevitable, but it is again upon
the Superior who should soothe this anomaly by constant increasing self-
confidence in the Student.
The Superior will periodically check Student's progress, although this
check cannot represent any pre-established rule or scheme, the only rudder
here is Superior’s feeling and experience. But let him know that he will be
used by the A ∴ A ∴ many times in such a way that the A ∴ A ∴ will
actually check the Probationer through him. He should work as he feels for
there is neither right nor wrong way here. Also, the Probationer should think
equally about all this, in the way given in his Task of the Grade:

He shall perform any tasks that the A ∴ A ∴ may see fit to lay upon him. Let him
be mindful that the word Probationer is no idle term, but that the Brothers will in
many a subtle way 'prove' hime, when he knoweth it not.

The awareness that the entire course of his Probation must be

accompanied by attention, the awareness that the Abyss and the Angel can
equally manifest at any moment, thus representing the highest discipline of
Jnana Yoga. The Student will have the following sentence repeated in the
same way, in every Grade:

... but that the Brothers will in many a subtle way 'prove' him, when he knoweth it
not....

At each moment, every Student is illuminated by the three great lights

of the A ∴ A ∴ : his Superior who is assigned to him, his Diary which is
written by him, and his Angel which is manifested through him. And each of
these three forms are projections of the one same hologram. His Superior is,
therefore, the balance between two extremes: his Diary, which represents his
lower form and his Angel, which represents the higher. The Diary, the
Superior, and the Angel: this is the Holy Trinity of our entire Order, and all
that the Aspirant needs is to follow these bright lights. It can be said that the
Superior is the visible resultant of two ultimate forces: Student’s Diary and
his Angel. Later, as the Aspirant achieves the ultimate Attainment, he will
realize that everything written in his Diary and all that the Angel will
manifest through the Knowledge and Conversation, is perfectly matching to
the imprint which the Superior engraves on his soul.
There is a Grade which has a special relationship with Students.
Namely, Superiors of all the Grades have an obligation to take care of
Students who are below them. But this does not apply to Adeptus Minor
because he has only one commitment in all the worlds, which is the
Knowledge and Conversation with his Holy Guardian Angel. On the other
hand, is not the highest ideal and benefit for the Student to observe someone
who is striving for such an exalted cause? How sublime is the study about the
A ∴ A ∴ , when the Student perceives the one who strives for the Great
Work, so directly as Adeptus Minor? The only Grade that does not have a
part of the Oath to dedicate to the Students is Adeptus Minor, but it does not
mean he will not do so.
The Superior always gains a Student who suits him, and the contrary:
before the Student appears the Superior who needs him the most. The
A ∴ A ∴ is a body that takes care of this; there is no need to waste too
much effort by thinking about it. Simply, the A ∴ A ∴ possesses a
mechanism of automatic compatibility, and the more you try to understand
this, the more lost you will be. This automatism is implied in all the Grades,
except one, and it can be freely said that this intelligence is completely
separate from us and the earthly Order. Therefore, the Student should not
waste time correcting someone else's version of Paradise, instead let him
adapt to the current one.
There are certain currents within our Order in which the Aspirant is
openly encouraged to receive a Probationer as soon as possible, while in
some he is preparing for that later. Maybe the most crucial dilemma which
spins the Aspirant's mind is the question of whether to take the role of the
Superior. The most intimate question that will ever be found in the
A ∴ A ∴ : “Am I worthy enough; am I valuable enough to be his Superior?
Can I do something wrong?” The answer is that one really cannot do
anything that the Student has not already earned for himself. The Superior
must not project himself in the Student. Instead, he should project the Student
inside his Angel.
Each Probationer already knows how to walk his own path, he does not
need any guidance other than himself, his intuition is his true guide, and for
advancement in the A ∴ A ∴ it is often necessary to follow it both with his
and someone else’s nose. But gathering on this path is something completely
different. To be a witness in his journey, his shadow companion, as we said
earlier, is a true weight of the Superior. Everything else is just speculations
about our complexes, hopes, and needs. Because everything is twisted in the
mind of the Probationer. Everything that he is passing through is just a
distorted picture of Adept's view of reality. Everything inside the Probationer
is distorted. No knowledge is sought, no success is required, he discovers that
he knows nothing and that his progress is not relevant. Lastly, knowledge is
not important as much as he thought all the time. And that time, especially
distorted is the time, which so terribly influences him through the Binah and
the 32nd path of the “Universe.” Exactly that one year will distort everything
inside him, but it will not break anything though. He will be so distorted until
he returns to his natural position, he will move hardly towards the eternal
west, always and only to the west, until he finds himself again at the spot
where he started. And then, he will realize that neither the west nor the east is
somewhere far away. They are here. They are all here and within.
CHAPTER FOUR
 PERSEPHONE
The ancient Greeks spoke among themselves about the immense
happiness of one girl. She was the daughter of Demeter, protector mother of
the wheat fields and the goddess of fertility, and Zeus, the supreme god and
ruler of Olympus. Her name was Cora, and goddess mother Demeter was so
attached to her that the whole earth was drawing its strength and fertility from
this love. The world, therefore, enjoyed the splendour of everything. Cora
grew happily alongside her mother and other goddesses, until Hades, the
master and god of the underworld, fell in love with her. One day Cora walked
through the meadows picking flowers. And just when she saw a beautiful
flower on the cliff, the moment she got closer to pick it up, hot and bitter
smell of sulfur spread all over the place. Suddenly, Hades stepped from the
chasm, kidnapped Cora and disappeared with her in the underground empire
with the speed of his black carriages. In vain Demeter sought her beloved
daughter. Desperate, she turned to Helios, hoping that he would show her
where she disappeared since he saw everything. When Helios told her the
truth, Demeter frowned and left Olympus, disguising himself as an old
woman and neglected all her duties. The land began to wither because
Demeter forbade it to yield any more crops. Finally, Zeus ordered Hades to
return Demeter his daughter, telling him that the gods and people would fall
because of this, and he gave assurance to Demeter that Cora would return to
her if she did not taste the grain from the Tree of the Lower World. Hades
unwillingly agreed to return Cora to the Upper World, but before that,
cunning as he was, he made her eat one grain of pomegranate. When she
finally returned to the world of the living, Cora enjoyed all the benefits from
the earth, but soon she received an overwhelming desire for the underground
kingdom. That one grain was enough to tie her forever to the underworld.
From that moment, she was known as Persephone. Then an agreement was
signed with Hades that Persephone would be three months with her husband
in the Lower World, and nine months in the Upper Kingdom, the world of the
living, with her mother, Demeter. And so Persephone, Hades Queen, was torn
apart between two loves. The love of her mother and the love of her husband,
love for the earth and love for the underworld. Love for the living and love
for the dead. Since then, the earth has never been the same, it would forever
go through the change of seasons, and all who live on earth will have to adapt
to that eternal change. Persephone had no children with Hades, and by
another myth, before going to the underworld, she gave birth to Dionysus
with the Zeus himself.
What is so crucial about Persephone, which is the matter of our
discussion in this holy place? Is it the love of her mother and the dependence
of all the living things, the affection of everything that breathes and gives
birth towards her, or that she is the goddess of the underworld kingdom, the
ruler of the dark world who was often together with Hecate? With utter
confidence, we say none of it, but rather one small detail, that grain of
pomegranate planted in her. Although surrounded by the immense love of her
mother Demeter and the whole earth, which so depended on her stay in the
Upper Realm, she nevertheless felt an urge, an unbearable instinct to return to
the underworld. This grain of pomegranate which she involuntarily tasted,
that idea that was thievishly implanted in her, which was inserted into her
mind, made all this love, all that care from her mother and all living things
irrelevant and unseen. She felt the urge to go down into the darkness, and no
one, even Zeus himself could have banished this urge. That seed that was
once embedded in Persephone became Persephone herself, equally her free
will as her fate.
This urge is the A ∴ A ∴ . Persephone is none other than the
Probationer; his Oath is Cora's grain of pomegranate. Even knowing the
consequences of all this, it would not prevent Cora from tasting the fruit
which would permanently tie her to the dark, distant kingdom so far away
from home and her mother. Persephone is, therefore, the personification of
inner nature, which is, just like an underworld seed, pursuing and banishing
against ratio and all the forces of normality. This is an urge for transcendental
death, as well as for life in that death, this urge more than anything in this
world is moving that same world. Indeed Persephone is a Probationer; the
tasted seed is his devoted Oath. Once taken, it will perform such
extraordinary, wonderful things. And now it is only a matter of time before
he will awake in the City of the Pyramids, for there is no longer a single god
or a star that can divert his unbearable urge, his authentic path.
Sense and call of nature. She could not stay with Demeter. Demeter is
her personal, sensual nature that resides in Malkuth, which is hiding so lovely
under the lee of Binah. This nature is merely longing to be called and carried
by outer influences. In the form of the external sun, which is believed to glow
and send light only for us and nobody else. Persephone turned against this
yearning and returned to the depths of the earth. She did what ultimately
every being would do in the moment of a great transition. And instead of
turning around the Sun, she turned to herself for the first time. She wished
farewell to the earth and Demeter's sweet calls and delivered herself from the
circles of wandering. For just in one short moment, that path would be dark
and misty. By turning to the inner darkness, the Self soon enters the scene of
the dazzling light, into the landscape painted by the true Sun. Demeter is by
no means an aspect of light, she is an illusion of light, and turning back to her
shows only one thing; that we chose to pursue the path of the most horrible
destiny, that we take the road which is not meant to be taken. To turn
ourselves inward, ceasing to look at the stars, but to settle our nature into
stellar space, where it belongs to. And finally applying the motto whose
destiny is worse than death: “know thyself.”
Persephone is the personification of a Probationer. But in its true light,
she signifies a Neophyte, with his earthly nature, driven by the earthly,
primordial urge. She neither can nor has the right to do anything but what is
her Will. Her freedom is hiding precisely in the fact that she wants nothing
but that. Her nature is not her choice; on the contrary, it is a complex
mechanism of the intersection of all external influences as well as internal,
for she is only the resultant of all forces acting through her being. Her will is
anything but hers, her identity is no other than from Nuit. Despite all
resistance of Mother Earth and her lower nature, she would still do what her
Will is and nothing else.
Demeter will, however, expose her influence later, which will be
particularly expressed through the Grade of the Neophyte, when the weight
of Binah will be almost unbearable. For Demeter is first loving and dear
Mother and the beauty of all the worlds, but soon she becomes the cruel
queen blackmailing and threatening of unthinkable sufferings if we do not
return to our earlier habits. These early habits are real only for Demeter; her
love is nothing else than the Ego complex, the tics and spasm of our nature
when we look at the everlasting starry sky, as we recognize our true home in
that gathering of stellar strays. Yes, in the gathering of stellar strays. What is
the A ∴ A ∴ ? Is that tiny grain also part of Persephone's fate and therefore
part of her nature? Is that grain something distinct from her, can we concur
that Persephone has gained her urge by external influence, without her will
and decision? Or both that grain and Persephone herself are just parts of one
larger entity, one greater mechanism, and consciousness?
This is an excellent place to suggest some of the original instructions on
the Order, as given in Liber XXXIII:

It is necessary, my dear brothers, to give you a clear idea of the interior Order; of that
illuminated community which is scattered throughout the world, but which is
governed by one truth and united in one spirit.
This community possesses a School, in which all who thirst for knowledge are
instructed by the Spirit of Wisdom itself; and all the mysteries of nature are preserved
in this school for the children of light. Perfect knowledge of nature and of humanity is
taught in this school. It is from her that all truths penetrate into the world; she is the
school of all who search for wisdom, and it is in this community alone that truth and
the explantation of all mystery are to be found. It is the most hidden of communities,
yet it contains members from many circles; nor is there any Centre of Thought whose
activity is not due to the presence of one of ourselves. From all time there has been an
exterior school based on the interior one, of which it is but the outer expression. From
all time, therefore, there has been a hidden assembly, a society of the Elect, of those
who sought for and had capacity for light, and this interior society was the Axle of the
R.O.T.A. All that any external order possesses in symbol, ceremony, or rite is the
letter expressive outwardly of that spirit of truth which dwelleth in the interior
Sanctuary. Nor is the contradiction of the exterior any bar to the harmony of the
interior.
Hence this Sanctuary, composed of members widely scattered indeed but united by
the bonds of perfect love, has been occupied from the earliest ages in building the
grand Temple (through the evolution of humanity) by which the reign of L.V.X. will
be manifest. This society is in the communion of those who have most capacity for
light; they are united in truth, and their Chief is the Light of the World himself,
V.V.V.V.V., the One Anointed in Light, the single teacher for the human race, the
Way, the Truth, and the Life.
The interior Order was formed immediately after the first perception of man's wider
heritage had dawned upon the first of the adepts; it received from the Masters at first-
hand the revelation of the means by which humanity could be raised to its rights and
delivered from its misery. It received the primitive charge of all revelation and
mystery; it received the key of true science, both divine and natural.
But as men multiplied, the frailty of man necessitated an exterior society which veiled
the interior one, and concealed the spirit and the truth in the letter, because many
people were not capable of comprehending great interior truth. Therefore, interior
truths were wrapped in external and perceptible ceremonies, so that men, by the
perception of the outer which is the symbol of the interior, might by degrees be
enabled safely to approach the interior spiritual truths.
But the inner truth has always been confided to him who in his day had the most
capacity for illumination, and he became the sole guardian of the original Trust, as
High Priest of the Sanctuary.
When it became necessary that interior truths should be enfolded in exterior ceremony
and symbol, on account of the real weakness of men who were not capable of hearing
the Light of Light, then exterior worship began. It was, however, always the type or
symbol of the interior, that is to say, the symbol of the true and Secret Sacrament.
The external worship would never have been separated from interior revel but for the
weakness of man, which tends too easily to forget the spirit in the letter; but the
Masters are vigilant to note in every nation those who are able to receive light, and
such persons are employed as agents to spread the light according to man's capacity
and to revivify the dead letter.
Through these instruments the interior truths of the Sanctuary were taken into every
nation, and modified symbolically according to their customs, capacity for instruction,
climate, and receptiveness. So that the external types of every religion, worship,
ceremonies and Sacred Books in general have more or less clearly, as their object of
instruction, the interior truths of the Sanctuary, by which man will be conducted to the
universal knowledge of the one Absolute Truth.
The more the external worship of a people has remained united with the spirit of
esoteric truth, the purer its religion; but the wider the difference between the symbolic
letter and the invisible truth, the more imperfect has become the religion. Finally, it
may be, the external form has entirely parted from its inner truth, so that ceremonial
observances without soul or life have remained alone.
In the midst of all this, truth reposes inviolable in the inner Sanctuary.
Faithful to the spirit of truth, the members of the interior Order live in silence, but in
real activity.
Yet, besides their secret holy work, they have from time to time decided upon
political strategic action.
Thus, when the earth was night utterly corrupt by reason of the Great Sorcery, the
Brethren sent Mohammed to bring freedom to mankind by the sword.
This being but partially a success, they raised up one Luther to teach freedom of
thought. Yet this freedom soon turned into a heavier bondage than before.
Then the Brethren delivered unto man the knowledge of nature, and the keys thereof;
yet this also was prevented by the Great Sorcery.
Now then finally in nameless ways, as one of our Brethren hath it now in mind to
declare, have they raised up One to deliver unto men the keys of Spiritual Knowledge,
and by His work shall He be judged.
This interior community of light is the reunion of all those capable of receiving light,
and it is known as the Communion of Saints, the primitive receptacle for all strength
and truth, confided to it from all time.
By it the agents of L.V.X. were formed in every age, passing from the interior to the
exterior, and communicating spiritand life to the dead letter, as already said.
This illuminated community is the true school of L.V.X.; it has its Chair, its Doctors;
it possesses a rule for students; it has forms and objects for study.
It has also its degrees for successive development to greater altitudes.
This school of wisdom has been for ever most secretly hidden from the world,
because it is invisible and submissive solely to illuminated government.
It has never been exposed to the accidents of time and to the weakness of man,
because only the most capable were chosen for it, and those who selected made no
error.
Through this school were developed the germs of all the sublime sciences, which
were first received by external schools, then clothed in other forms, and hence
degenerated.
According to time and circumstances, the society of sages communicated unto the
exterior societies their symbolic hieroglyphs, in order to attract man to the great truths
of their Sanctuary.
But all exterior societies subsist only by virtue of this interior one. As soon as external
societies wish to transform a temple of wisdom into a political edifice, the interior
society retires and leaves only the letter without the spirit. It is thus that secret
external societies of wisdom were nothing but hieroglyphic screens, the truth
remaining inviolable in the Sanctuary so that she might never be profaned.
 In this interior society man finds wisdom and with her All— not the wisdom of this
world, which is but scientific knowledge, which revolves round the outside but never
touches the centre (in which is contained all strength), but true wisdom, understanding
and knowledge, reflections of the supreme illumination.
All disputes, all controversies, all the things belonging to the false cares of this world,
fruitless discussions, useless germs of opinions which spread the seeds of disunion, all
error, schisms, and systems are banished. Neither calumny nor scandal is known.
Every man is honoured. Love alone reigns.
We must not, however, imagine that this society resembles any secret society,
meeting at certain times, choosing leaders and members, united by special objects. All
societies, be what they may, can but come after this interior illuminated circle. This
society knows none of the formalities which belong to the outer rings, the work of
man. In this kingdom of power all outward forms cease.
L.V.X. is the Power always present. The greatest man of his times, the chief himself,
does not always know all the members, but the moment when it is necessary that he
should accomplish any object he finds them in the world with certainty ready to his
hand.
This community has no outside barriers. He who may be chosen is as the first; he
presents himself among the others without presumption, and he is received by the
others without jealousy.
If it be necessary that real members should meet together, they find and recognize
each other with perfect certainty.
No disguise can be used, neither hypocrisy nor dissimulation could hide the
characteristic qualities which distinguish the members of this society. All illusion is
gone, and things appear in their true form.
No one member can choose another; unanimous choice is required. Though not all
men are called, many of called are chosen, and that as soon as they become fit for
entrance.
Any man can look for the entrance, and any man who is within can teach another to
seek for it; but only he who is fit can arrive within.
Unprepared men occasion disorder in a community, and disorder is not compatible
with the Sanctuary. Thus it is impossible to profane the Sanctuary, since admission is
not formal but real.
Worldly intelligence seeks this Sanctuary in vain; fruitless also will be the efforts of
malice to penetrate these great mysteries; all is indecipherable to him who is not ripe;
he can see nothing, read nothing in the interior.
He who is fit is joined to the chain, perhaps often where he though least likely, and at
a point of which he knew nothing himself.
To become fit should be the sole effort of him who seeks wisdom.
But there are methods by which fitness is attained, for in this holy communion is the
primitive storehouse of the most ancient and original science of the human race, with
the primitive mysteries also of all science. It is the unique and really illuminated
community which is absolutely in possession of the key to all mystery, which knows
the centre and source of all nature. It is a society which unites superior strength to its
own, and counts its members from more than one world. It is the society whose
members form the republic of Genius, the Regent Mother of the whole World.[3]

The beauty of Persephone’s transformation, from the point of the

A ∴ A ∴ , is reflected in the relation between her change and her nature.
For she does not want a change, yet in the same way she does not regret it.
She is a part of that change, and without her, that change would never come
to life in the Universe. From the moment of taking the Oath of a Probationer,
each event retains the same power that it had earlier, now richer for one new
element. An element of pure love, a trigger that has no match anywhere in
our Work, which sadly everyone returns to only when we are left out of other
options. But Persephone secretly knows that what she wants and what she
does not want, and what she is and what she will be is the one same thing.
Whether she resides in the underworld with her husband Hades or on the
surface with her mother Demeter, she loves and understands all of them in
the same way. And that all is the A ∴ A ∴ .
CHAPTER FIVE
 DIARY
If there is anything so closely connected to our external being, as much
as our innermost nature, it is our magical Diary. Although it can be assigned
as a testimony of our Oath, it has a lot of distinct qualities.
You will be amazed by the fact that writing about a particular act
changes the very act itself. This discovery is especially important for both the
Probationer and the Neophyte, and it will sustain the Aspirant to the farthest
reaches of the Golden Dawn. Even Adeptus Minor does not find an objection
to this claim. Both the Diary and the Superior play the precisely same
function, except in the opposite manner of acting. The most feasible way is to
look at the Diary as your inner Superior.
Jotting the practice into a Diary is a practice unto itself and
understanding this is greatly valuable for each Aspirant. Right from the
beginning, I wish to emphasize that Diary should be the opus of all of our
senses, thoughts, urges, successes and failures, rises and falls, and not just a
mere record of operation and a report of the result. It is essential for the
Aspirant to write about seemingly irrelevant things for which he will have no
insight into their potential impact on anything in the future. Although it might
not be related to his chosen practice, the Aspirant must always think that he is
in no way in a position to assess what is important and what is not. Here,
everything is crucial, and nothing is irrelevant. In this whole business, you
are a guard, not a general. One mistake of yours, a minute of sleep on the
watch, and an entire regiment could be destroyed.
Throughout the Probation, an Angel might express his nature in a single
moment, in a dream or a lost thought, but in a manner that is completely
incomprehensible to the mind of the Probationer. One of the essential roles of
a Diary is to map the inner world in such a way that only after a subsequent
analysis this small detail will become revealed. It is the higher Grades
specifically, such as Philosophus or Dominus Liminis, that, at the summing-
up of all realizations, encounter a specific test of Ruach along with the
awareness that they are ever-so-close to their True Will, as, in fact, they are.
And in that fantastic period, by examining the past diaries, finding the right
trail can be of great value.
 This case particularly applies to a Neophyte, who may frequently
receive a Vision or hear a Voice. This brief experience – a slight moment, a
glint of Tiphareth – is not the ultimate one, and as he instantly finds himself
back in Malkuth, it can be said with certainty that this flash of short-term
enlightenment can affect the entire work further into the A ∴ A ∴ . This
phenomenon of short-term enlightenment is also known in the East under
various names and forms, and we will only mildly mention the experience of
Kensho and some variants of Dhyana. It rarely ensues as a logical reward and
a refund of spiritual effort, but rather it takes form as one out of two possible
instances. The first, as a result of well-balanced work, in which there is no
passion or tendency, but instead what takes place is the acceptance of all
possible experiences as a simple resultant of the Will, wherein enlightenment
appears only as an echo of the Aspirant's inner calm. The second, this being a
more common and drastic example, as a result of unbalanced practice, a state
of frustrated struggle and tension in dealing with energies that are difficult or
even impossible to control. Although the goal is identical, the second case is
far more devastating if the flash of enlightenment does not occur, which is,
statistically speaking, rare relative to the high frequency of such a case. As
before, this mainly refers to the Grade of the Neophyte, in which the
strikingly different experiences between the previous way of life and working
with the raw energies of the astral plane can be extremely dramatic. It is
difficult to fathom how such great sacrifice would ever become profitable;
this stroke on the Aspirant’s psyche and nerves gets transmitted through the
entirety of his being. Initially, the magician is dashed and energized, yet due
to his weak experience, he is unable to ground these terrible forces which end
up acting upon his being like horrible and infernal acid. Whatever yet
remains, if anything, is unlikely to endure the flame, afterward cast by the
Philosophus.
Precisely the Neophyte knows this very well on a deeply subconscious
level, and like a prayer of the supreme salvation, he projects this forward to
himself as an experience of Knowledge or Conversation[4]; however to do so
in the manner that he, as the Aspirant of the Golden Dawn, can understand
well enough to serve him as an additional burning fuel, once he burned all the
fire before time with his unbalanced work. How fantastic the A ∴ A ∴
mechanism is, self-sustaining and self-regulatory, acting in advance and
always for the Aspirant's transition. The only vehicle by which this
mechanism can serve his being, turning itself into aid whenever needed and
by whatever means necessary, is a fresh record that will pour forth the
awareness of that given moment. That is why it is essential to record
everything that is considered important. Even that which is exceptionally
irrelevant or ordinary, if it goes beyond the boundaries of irrelevancy, must
also be noted in the Diary for it could serve as a trigger for the supreme
experience. Perhaps. However, I can only regret that, as a Probationer, I
exclusively made records relative to my practice; although such accounts
were quite satisfactory, encompassing countless results, thoughts, and
insights, they represent only a small part of my Probation. The Diary is about
a Probationer, not about Probationer's practices. It has a personality, in the
same way a Probationer has. And this personality advances and grows only
by diversity. Besides his daily practice, the Probationer also has a duty to
write and keep a record of it. The practice of writing a magical Diary is the
first actual step inside the Golden Dawn, and if I were forced to reject all
meditations and ritual practices, I would do so only if it were permitted for
me to carry on with my magical Diary. Therefore, before we even take a look
at all the various practices and possibilities that lie before the Probationer,
once he took upon his Oath, we will study this practice above all other
methods and discuss the various manners of keeping a Diary.
First and foremost, the Probationer should understand what is
considered important in the first place. Before he even comes in possession of
the gold, he must know how to interpret the treasure map. If you write a
Diary for ten years, you can observe your own handwriting changing, and as
much as you change, there is something that remains the same. But the Will
that writes the words, the practices which grow and experiences that
transcend, precisely that Will that drives you to all this, remains absolutely
intact and the same. Indeed, this is the practice of Dhyana Yoga, perhaps
more so than anything else. No matter how well the Probationer remembers
past experiences as he leafs through his Diary, he always does so in the
present. Therefore, the Diary is always more of a reminder of the current
now, while glancing over those of before. This now, which looks at that
before. And just when he thinks that he has figured this trick, the Probationer
realizes that he is all time that before which is living inside now. That is the
whole wisdom of the Diary.
There are certain things that I would like you to consider. The first one
is to encourage you to experiment and play with the ways you enter
information into your Diary. You have to allow a Diary to breathe and
develop, you must never be satisfied with one form of recording because
inevitably there will appear another one to replace it. Write in the third
person. When you make a journal entry, do so as if you are writing about
someone else, as if you are writing a biography. Then, write in the second
person. Write to Him, instead to Yourself. This is a brilliant exercise that can
grow into deep contemplation.
Another thing I am referring to is an example of a pattern, by which you
will enter your own experience and which will be universal for all practices.

1. Type of work
2. Aim of work
3. Time of work
4. Place of work
5. Plan of work
6. Essential points of work
7. Physical health
8. Psychological condition
9. Atmosphere
10. Instruments and weapons
11. Possible obstacles
12. Stumbled obstacles
13. Impressions before work
14. Impressions during work
15. Impressions after work
16. Insights and observations
17. Lessons learned
18. Comments
19. Additional notes
20. Work rating

It is crucial that you have feedback about what has been done and how.
Evaluating your work will prove remarkably valuable. You can rate work
from 1 to 5, from 1 to 10, or even from 1 to 100. The wider the range of
numbers, the higher the skill and sufficiency are necessary. Keep in mind that
evaluation must always be in accordance with a predetermined aim;
therefore, if you perform the ritual of the pentagram with the goal of, god
help us, protection, and if we as a result of the ritual receive a splendorous
vision of the Lord himself with his angelic chariots, the rate of the work will
be pronouncedly low. Keep in mind that our nature will find ways to replace
one lesser, expected success, with another, more fascinating failure, just to
turn you away from the path of intent. Therefore, it is vital that we know
what we do, how we do it and, above all, why we do it.
There are two types of diaries. The first type, which, for many, serves as
a reminder. And another, which for a few serves as a testimony. The former
is a gift of the most precious kind, making the Aspirant see that every record
in the Diary is one and the same dialogue between him and his God; each
entry is a description of always the same thing but in countless other
languages, as each event is actually just one of the infinite numbers of
anagrams of the name of his Angel. And out of all the things that happen to
you, or at least that you think happened, and which you write down so
zealously in your records, you always, in fact, think about only one thing. Let
each Student stumble in this place, thinking about that one single thing which
surrounds all of his efforts, all of his energy and enthusiasm, that which is
familiar to all Students, Aspirants and Adepts, the circumstance that is the
same for each living organism in this and all other universes.
Also, take particular care of your dreams, but in a proper and lucid
manner. A note in the Diary does not serve to admire your phantasmagorias
but to dissect them, measure them, probe them with the flame of childish
intrigue. There are countless models upon which the dreams are correctly
recorded, and it is up to you to construct the one that suits you the most.
When you record a dream, it is important to write it down immediately upon
waking no matter how convinced you are that you will remember it later. It is
also crucial that you give your dream a name. As if it were a movie, try to
provide the best name to your last night’s blockbuster. Furthermore, find the
symbol around which the dream is revolving. It is usually an object or a
person around which the whole dream happens – try to discover and name
what that is. Your subconscious uses sleep as we use adjectives in order to
describe a certain noun, a dream for your unconscious nature is what a
delightful verse is to a poet. Therefore, you need to find what is being
adorned by that strophe, what is behind the stylistic figure of your
subconscious, what kind of phenomenon has turned on the mischief behind
your closed eyes. Is it a person who exists in real life, maybe someone from
the past? Is it an object, or perhaps an event, emotion or a thought? In any
case, it must be one term, not two or three, not more or less, but one and only.
Come closer to that term from the state of wakefulness, what does it bring
when you think about it? Is it pleasure or discomfort, fear or ignorance, lust
or need? Get out of the role of a dreamer; you need to transform the dream
into a creative force of your intent, not to remain a passive and random
cobweb of your unconscious.
It can be said that each Grade cherishes a specific relationship with the
Diary, that there is a special thread that binds the Diary with a certain Grade,
and that this thread has a different nature on each occasion. Writing a Diary
has such unique, sublime boredom that is independent of our own will.
Sometimes it can occur, sometimes not, sometimes months can pass or even
years of zealous writing, but then simply come to a halt which cannot be
overcome by even thousands of insights and advancements in the Grade until
the thing moves by itself. Sometimes this pause in writing is only a
consequence of certain processes that are induced by the Grade itself;
sometimes it is a new temptation that needs to be assimilated. Each Grade
possesses mechanisms which can be manifested in every Aspirant, although it
cannot be said with certainty for whom, and to what extent.
The Probationer has one special gift, so striking and powerful it can
influence his entire passage through the Golden Dawn. This can be a unique
feeling, a moment of lucidity, a strange presentiment, a dream, a scent in the
house we are entering for the first time which revives within us some ancient
sense, a smile on the face we see for the first time in some foreign city, a
voice that awakens in us such a vivacious sense of association with someone
as if that voice was sent from the heavens and then disappeared without trace.
This feeling needs to be noted in the Diary in the way it fits; precisely in this
event could lay the key to our Knowledge and Conversation. In this one brief
event, and far too often we are not aware of it throughout whole Probation
and even further, the mechanism of unlocking Our Self is hidden, which is
locked in such a way that thinking about the key actually forms the lock
itself. Probationer's mind then finds synchronicity and announces that
everything fits perfectly, but the truth is miraculously different from his
insight. The point is not in the opening of that lock, but turning the key which
is, in fact, the Probationer himself. This is the movement where the
Knowledge and Conversation lay hidden, for this movement gives the
meaning to the lock, which would have no purpose without the key. There is
nothing special in the lock, as true initiation is not in finding the appropriate
key. The whole mystery of the Rose and Cross is in one remarkable fact: that
your lock had already been opened by someone much earlier. The lock is not
sealed at all; the Angel is the one who is behind, waiting only for you. He is
the one who left you the key to find him, who made you construct both the
lock and a door and then made you forget everything so you can discover it.
Discover it again, everlasting again. The Diary is a map of all your keys and
locks ever. Each record is an attempt of pairing, and in a single record, which
is usually irrelevant, is hidden the finest guidepost. The route to your Angel.
This case especially applies to the Neophyte, which will be addressed in more
detail later. It is therefore of utmost importance that the Probationer records
everything, maps each event and sketches any thought he considers even to
have a bit of chance of being related to the Self. Openly speaking, the perfect
Diary would indicate achievement of the Adeptus Exemptus, so the
Probationer should not be burdened with the amount of information which he
must implement within. He is condemned to failure in advance, but that
failed attempt prepared and sharpened his other weapons in the most proper
and delicate way. The Diary is a weapon that he improves most of all; this
weapon will follow him from the first day of his Probation until the final
corners of the Rose and the Cross.
Each Diary is an aspect of Mercury, in both its lower and higher forms,
and such forms advance as the Aspirant advances, whether it is the
manifestation of Hod or Chokmah. The Diary of the Probationer is almost
always under the influence of Hod, and his closeness with the Neophyte is
irresistibly attracted by Binah. Precisely in that way, each of his entries in the
Diary brings him unavoidably closer to his Tiphareth. Some resemblances
between the nature of the Diary and the nature of the Grade should be mildly
pointed out, so that the Aspirant should think about such relations which he
will examine in more detail with his careful analysis.
Each Grade possesses some level of boredom for writing, but it is
particularly expressed in the Grade of the Probationer and Practicus.
Probationer's glumness becomes Practicus's boredom; the nature of both
extremes here is almost identical and equally devastating to the progress of
both Grades. A Neophyte should especially pay attention to the records of
dreams and astral experiences and there is no need to wait for an ideal
moment to write a dream, but it should immediately be followed by
awakening. More than a clear experience in the morning even at noon will
become far and pale. The Neophyte must be open to the deepest sexual
fantasies; his analytical mind must prevail over the raw energies of the
vampire, which for the Neophyte could have a unique, cataclysmic role.
Observations regarding physical health and illnesses could be very valuable,
which the Practicus will later derive from the darkness of coincidence, giving
them a deeper meaning. The Zelator should not bypass the recording of all of
his boundaries, whether they are physical or spiritual in nature. It is also
important that he notes all the insights about the work of alchemy, regardless
of how shallow or childlike they may look. Similar to the Neophyte, the
Practicus should also carefully record astral experiences, but this time he
must pay attention to what is reflected in his mind during sleep or astral
journey. He must analyze with his sharp mind the nature of all these
reflections and see what idea is in their root. The Practicus must also pay
special attention for all the earlier memories he can suddenly and
unexpectedly receive along the Grade. Illumination of childhood is a crucial
lever in his work. The Philosophus analyses in detail all the objects of his
desire, he makes an exclusive list of all the things that cause him to be
ecstatic and empowered, and he sees the connection of this with earlier
memories, which he wrote as a Practicus. He must not be nostalgically
attached to old records. Adeptus Minor crowns all this with success. Yes
indeed, he crowns all this with certain success.
There is no significant difference whether the Diary is written
electronically or in a notebook. It may be best to have both versions.
Sometimes it is so convenient to have an electronic Diary, especially when
you travel and share your experiences with others. And sometimes it is good
to have paper, on which you can scrabble and express your feelings
graphically, in a drawing, in a more plastic shape than you would otherwise
do by typing your thoughts at the keyboard. There is nothing more fantastic
than when, after a few days or even weeks of hard practices and challenging
insights, what remains of it is only one short mottle that will forever transmit
all that tremble inside of you. Just one glance at this drawing will produce the
regression of the entire experiment, from the beginning to the final
conclusions, even years after.
Indeed, the leading question that Probationers ask is what should be
written into the Diary; what is important, and what is not. What kind of
events are worth and what kind of spiritual encounters are suited to be
included in the Diary's log. Is not every event equally related to each other
and is not every corner of the Universe equally connected to all things? Is not
every act a specific relationship between God and your soul? The answer to
this question is in the consciousness of what is important at that moment; it
can be said that some of the best Diaries do not contain any single practice;
and that those which are filled with poor records on the amount of breath, the
time frames of the ritual, whether it was raining or not during the Middle
Pillar, they all do not deserve a single drop of our ink.
Always think that writing about act changes the act itself, so it is
completely of no preference what you write about, as long as it is the act of
your creative love and true devotion.
The Diary is not a record of your practice, but a record of your living
soul, it is not a reminder of what it was, nor what it will be, but always and
only what is. Every record in your Diary is like a lottery card. Each record
and every practice is just one of the combinations, only one combination out
of all others can be a winning combination, and only Great Work will give
meaning to everything that is written. Play with the Diary; it must breathe, it
must live. The Probationer must be the bridegroom, his Diary must be his
bride.
CHAPTER SIX
 MOTTO
Before taking his Oath in the first place, the Probationer chooses his
magical Motto or name. There are many ways in which we can realize the
magnitude of this endeavor, but neither one can adequately capture the
essence better than this: searching for a name is searching for the Self.
The Motto is a metaphor of Will. Choosing the Motto is the Aspirant's
first attempt of the Great Work. Though it is condemned to failure, it will
enforce the avalanche of coincidences – the magical links that connect the
Aspirant's mind with the conceptual essence of Adonai, and no matter how
this idea is an illusion at its final range, it will slowly begin to materialize in
his mind. Even at this moment, no matter how firm your objections are in
your conscious, rational mind, it is precisely these words that crush these
objections, and right now your thoughts about Adonai are Adonai's thoughts
about you.
Let us begin with a very simple thought; our name is something that is
inaccurately associated with ourselves, and despite how devoted we are to
that name, it is yet given to us without our blessing. No matter how hard we
try to find a link between ourselves and our name, we will find nothing
insightful. But a nickname is indeed a different instance altogether. Although
some nicknames are just abbreviations of the names, the vast majority of
them contain some of our phenomena, mostly physical, and it is not a rare
case that a nickname is related to our character.
The Motto goes even further. You can assume the direction we are
moving, try now to give yourself a name that best describes what you are.
Give yourself a name that you have never heard before; this is a wonderful
meditation method that can result in continuous digging into your mind over
something which you know very well, but that is yet so distant. You
somehow know who it is, but you do not know his name. The essence of
Abramelin's operation is covered identically. Indeed, if you choose your new
name, what name would that be? The only condition is that the new name
does not exist anywhere. This is a brilliant task, simple as effective.
Each pronunciation of the name is an act of Invocation. Every letter and
every instance of naming things, whether known or unknown, is a true
conjuration; it is crucial for the Aspirant to understand the model of thinking
that initiates this process. The act of responding to advertisements from
weekly newspapers is no different from the act of invoking an Angel; the
magician must understand that all the principles in the universe are the
principles of his own mind and that if he truly understands how one single
cogwheel moves, he will understand all things in the Universe.
With a name, you can summon, as much as you can banish. To realize
this in more detail, we have to rest for a while and devote ourselves to one
other thing. This is one of the basic mechanisms with which the Aspirant is
acquainted already at the beginning of his work while practicing the ritual of
the pentagram. Sadly, there is so much rambling surrounding this affair that,
from such pointless repetition his mind habituated to doing things incorrectly
so that one can no longer recognize or feel anything that is truly expressed by
the names. Therefore, in the names he perceives what as opposed to who.
This can lead one to become tangled in such a terrible mistake in his work
over the years that he does not feel any progress at all, does not feel any
change and does not feel any reason why he would continue. It is so
inconvenient to think that we use all rituals and meditations to develop what
we already possess, even though we are endowed by the most wonderful
circumstance of all. That of Feeling. For good, bad, right or wrong, success
or failure. And most of all, for beauty. Learn to feel everything so you can
see beauty in all things. Even the ratio must be felt to be rational. Without the
feeling and sensation of the rational truth, there is no rationale to be true.
Even the lack of sensation is a sensation, in a certain sense. A sense of
emptiness is by no means an emptiness, as much as it is a sense. That
mechanism of feeling, which in most supreme way plants within us the truth
about a being which feels, far more than the sum of all feelings that flow
through it, is contained within every Oath in the A ∴ A ∴ . The Aspirant
understands that within himself there is an emphasized idea of the being; he
sees that all feelings are nothing more than different aggregate states of that
one being. If we could gather in one place all the feelings of the world, we
could only distinguish a couple of different ones. Actually, we would arrive
what we call the Grades.
Therefore, the Aspirant acts in the following roles, making
corresponding decisions:
a) the Probationer; to obtain scientific knowledge of the nature and powers of his own being,
 b) the Neophyte; to obtain control of the nature and powers of his own being,
c) the Zelator; to obtain control of the foundations of his own being,
d) the Practicus; to obtain control of the vacillations of his own being,
e) the Philosophus; to obtain control of the attractions and repulsions of his own being,
e) the Dominus Liminis; to obtain control of the aspirations of his own being.
By a name we can swear, invite, invoke, evoke or banish, call or recall,
but only if we are in contact with that essence which uses such a name as a
drive and if we know what the name really is carrying and what nature is
hidden behind it. The name must be in balance with the desired force. In the
idea of balance lies the key to all our pursuits; indeed it serves the education
of our mind to deal appropriately with the forces of nature. All the strategies
of wonder are hidden in spending the entirety of available resources for
finding the leverage point, never in rising power for the movement itself.
When the perfect balance of the forces is found, the thing starts to act on its
own. The will of a magician is often a weak thing when it comes to initiating,
but it is unbeatable when it comes to accomplishing. Therefore, the
knowledge of the correct pronunciation of the name is less valuable than the
knowledge of the nature behind the name. This observation particularly refers
to the work within the Enochian system. After all, nothing is as efficient as
silence itself. The full effect of the ritual commences only after its final word,
never during the performance itself; the type of silence when words become
mere echo within the mind drained from active desire, and once the Will has
already been previously invested in the awareness of the goal. Success is
found at the end, as all ends are crowned by silence. What is the common
conclusion of all books, stories, poems and fables? It is a dot in the end, and
no matter how magnificent the saga is, that dot has more to say than all the
letters and words combined. If the dot is the body, then silence which occurs
after is the blood of that sacred organism with which we must make our final
communion at the end of all lessons, tasks and insights. Without it, any
message would be without meaning. This silence is equally in the Knowledge
and Conversation, as much as it is in all the Mottos of the Aspirants.
There are two main ways of dealing with names. When you rob the
bank, always start from below and never from the top. This is gold-worthy
advice; you have to be on good terms with a doorkeeper, or even better with a
cleaning lady who will give you the right information in exchange for a kind
word regarding her new red shoes, unlike everyone else in the bank who
might be mocking her. Flattering to a bank's executive is meaningless; no
matter how high your offer, it will never be enough. Therefore, one way is to
use the names through forcefulness, while the other is binding with love. One
by cursing, the other by embracing. Both approaches are neither good nor
bad, as right or wrong can only be the mind that uses what is given by the
gods. To all these things, the Aspirant needs to pay attention to fully
understand the principle on which lie the use and purpose of magical names.
The magical Motto is an aphorism of the magician; it is a symbolic
direction and a mark of the course on which sails his solar bark. And yet, the
choice of magical Motto contains magic as it exists in thunders; just because
we understand physical preconditions for creating a phenomenon, it does not
diminish the excitement we feel for the upcoming storm. Choosing your own
Motto at the very beginning implies: “I am not what I am. For I am what I
want to be.” It draws great magic from the fact that the concept of one’s I is
changing. Although small and weak in the beginning, its force will spread
and grow until it reaches the final corners of spiritual attainment. A magical
Motto, in the same way as a Diary, follows the Aspirant to the ultimate
frontiers of the Tree of Life and with its change, the Aspirant perceives an
exceptional observation. By advancing through the Grades and the shift of
magical Mottos, the Aspirant turns to what remains the same. The impersonal
and selfless Self, which can be called but does not have to. It chooses its
name because it chooses its destiny. It takes the Sphinx upon itself, although
it will be born in the City of the Pyramids. Emphasis is not on the name, but
on the Self, which is only called by that name. Therefore, it is not what, but
who. A remarkable exercise can astonish the Aspirant with its brilliant effect
if he closes his eyes and, after a couple of deep pranic breaths, asks himself
out loud: “Who am I?“ A moment later, he should begin with careful
observation of all impressions in his being provoked by this who. Let the
Aspirant repeat “Who am I,” first slowly and then at a faster pace, let him feel
which part of his body reacts to this provocation and in what manner. Is that
reaction coming from him at all or from something else that is just looks like
him; what is it, who is it, what color is it, what smell? What emotion arises, is
it angry or resigned, does it appear with melancholy or react with
enthusiasm? It is completely irrelevant what is arising, as long as it arises.
The Aspirant should induce the reaction of his oblivious nature and to, first of
all, feel the difference between what and who He is.
By constructing a Motto, the magician calls upon one of two things:
strength or weakness. Regarding what we are or what we yet want to become.
Although we can derive a strong consent in the notion that a Motto should be
something that is yet to be achieved, we can equally find the truth on the
contrary – that the emphasis should be on the current imperfection of the
Aspirant. In one way, his aim is an imaginary and unreal achievement, and no
matter how high or noble it is, it is still not real. The other way is to stick to
the present moment; his relic will be eternal now as he will rely on what he
already has. It is precisely in that moment of now, in that achievable distance
in relation to the goal which is still further away, the realization that this now
is the same now both in tomorrow and yesterday, and that any unenlightened
being now, is enlightened in some other present. Each Aspirant should
discover his favorable truth, and let it be provoked by any other or all truths
in the world conjoined. Let him revive this excellence in the way it suits him
and at the expense of his own interest.
Sometimes a single Motto can cover several different Grades;
sometimes it can be restored in the same or altered form. The variants are
countless; any predefined rules here lead to failure and confusion. The
inventiveness of individuals is proportional to the uniqueness of their nature,
which is the opposite equivalent to the ingenuity of their magical Mottos.
We will mention examples used by some of our older Brothers and
Sisters, within the various Orders.

Julian Baker Causa Scientiae

(Latin: "For the sake of knowledge")

Aleister Crowley Perdurabo

(Latin: "I Will endure to the end")

Aleister Crowley Christeos Luciftias

Florence Farr Sapientia Sapienti Dona Data

(Latin: "Wisdom is a gift given to the wise")

William Wynn Westcott Sapere Aude

(Latin: "Dare to Know")
William Butler Yeats Demon est Deus inversus
(Latin: "The demon is the reverse of God")

Allen Bennett Iehi Aour

(Hebrew: "Let there be light")

Israel Regardie Ad Majoram Adonai Gloriam

 (Latin: "For the greater glory of the Lord")

J.F.C. Fuller Per Ardua ad Astra

(Latin: "By struggle to the stars")

Charles Stansfeld Jones Unus In Omnibus

(Latin: "One in All")

Charles Stansfeld Jones Parsival

George Cecil Jones Volo Noscere

(Latin: "I Wish to Know")

Victor Benjamin Neuburg Omnia Vincam

(Latin: "I will conquer all")

Jane Wolfe Estai

(Greek έσται: “I will be”)

Leila Waddell Agatha

Karl Germer Saturnus

Grady McMurtry Hymenaeus Alpha

First, you need to start from the fundamentals. Is your name indeed your
own, or the name of what you wish to become? Is it perhaps a Him or a Her,
or is it a middle genus? Is it the form, shape, color, or name of an animal or
plant? Could it be the name of an angel or a god or goddess? Does it have
some other hidden name inside of it? Which is it and why?
Since we are already on this matter, I want to mention an extraordinary
exercise in which you would attempt to experience yourself with a different
face and body. Simply try to fathom yourself with an entirely new face, but
not with the one already familiar to you, it must be an entirely distinct face, a
face of a complete stranger. Imagine that your body burned down and
suddenly you are a person you have never seen before, embodying this new
form from now to eternity. It is quite possible that you will feel certain
sorrow at that moment, but if you focus on this feeling of grief, you will see
that it is changing. Now as you look closer, you will feel that it is not sadness
that is changing. You will experience a transition in the self-perception, but
more importantly, you will realize that this self has been related purely to the
image, and with the change of that image you will arrive at more precise
knowledge of your Self. Your awareness grows into a new mold very rapidly,
just like water adjusts to the vessel in which it rests. In this movement is
presented the full importance of taking the magical names or Mottos. In fact,
in changing your name while taking up the magical Motto, you do not change
yourself at all. You are not changing yourself; you are coming to yourself.
You are altering the entire external reality because now it has to construct a
completely different destiny towards you, and in that business, somehow, as
if it was surprised. In such relationship lies a wonderful trick of the mind, in
this change that is spurred by your intent. By taking on a new perspective of
reality, you are not only changing reality and yourself for that matter, but you
also realize that this vessel is merely the product of the Self, chosen and
modified by the Will. Full understanding of “Who I am” would lead to the
Knowledge and Conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel. This new
perspective could lead to attainment even more simply. Try to perform your
chosen daily practice while wearing a mask. Make your mask, shape it and
color it in the way your Self wishes to do so. Perform the ritual underneath,
and you will notice a radical improvement; as you were sheltered under a
mask, in fact, what took place is something quite the opposite – you pulled
the veil away from yourself. By putting on the mask, you have uncovered the
Self – this is a greatly convenient observation that the Aspirant can obtain for
his Probation.
The essence of the Motto is indeed not in the technique of construction.
Gematric value of the letters only serves to connect the integrity of the
Aspirant to what that value refers to. It can be said that finding and
constructing deeper gematric currents within the name is a remarkable thing.
For example, an Aspirant can take the initial and final letter as the beginning
of some completely new value and then develop this new idea further. But
that can never replace the feeling of identity with the Motto which is, in fact,
always a feeling of unity with the Self. The Motto is a link to that unity and
not the goal as such. Of course, the Qabalistic skill of finding a more
profound value depends on the creativity of the Aspirant; that skill should
develop during the Grades as it will become more than necessary in further
work.
Sometimes it is worth to adopt a name which is close to one and to
which the Aspirant has already built inner values, and that he is familiar with
the mythology or the story that his name carries. But surely, sometimes in a
completely unknown meaning lays hidden power that will move the Aspirant
forward. In some cases, however, the meaning is created just along the way,
while the Aspirant advances through the Grades. Either way, the Aspirant is
left to judge by his own nature and instinct.
The adoption of the Motto is not exclusive to the Grade of Probationer.
During each Grade you need to define a relationship with that same Motto
and see if something has changed, whether the Motto is more or less
incorporated into your being, whether it is awakened and in what way. Once
a month, within three or six months, you need to ask yourself: “how much of
me is in the Motto? What is it inside of my being that rejects it and why is it
so uncomfortable for me to embody it? What does it want from me? Does it
want me to change something? Does it want to change itself?” All these
subtle feelings require coming to the surface, and nothing more remains for
us but to be careful, to glance these feelings. You must not be a Motto. You
must be Yourself, while the power of that Motto is in the liveliness of such
Self. Destroy all links with your fate, tear all ties from your identity. Only in
this way, the Motto will have a wider meaning than a mere number or a name
accidentally incised onto your Oath. Only in this way, it will truly pave your
way to the Great Work so you can easily embark upon it. And just as you tied
your personal name to your personality, as you turn with the feeling of self
whenever someone calls out your name, so your Motto is the true Word and
the Law of the Universe. Thus it becomes Ariadne's thread hooked to your
Angel, and when you pronounce your Motto, the whole Universe will turn for
you.
The Aspirant should at all cost refrain from thinking that the name has
an identity. The name is a carrier of emptiness, as the void is a pure content
of all identities. Indeed, let the Aspirant speak his name given to him at birth
and let him feel where the source of that name is. Let him say aloud “Who am
I,” then chasing that divine river of feeling which will bring him to the place
of origin of his being. He will realize that this feeling is not anywhere
specific, but rather he is this feeling itself. Like the illusion which helps him
understand it as the Self; it is just a side effect of the presence of the Universe
within him. Once he seizes it, let the Aspirant gently meditate on that feeling;
he will perceive that it constantly moves like mercury. But this fantastic
sensation, always existing in space from whence the Self observes, tells the
Aspirant that it does not exist in space at all. This emptiness is not empty of
things; it is empty of time. The Great Work is a phenomenon of time; the
Angel is just a name of the present, in as much as the Motto is the nickname
of the past.
The Great Work draws its essence from the fact that all these things are
incoherent by themselves, and there is no level of cause and consequence
between them, as there are no things in which this between could take place.
Therefore the relationship between the Motto and the Angel is the same
relationship between the Aspirant and the Motto. In every present which
continually exists in the same way, the Aspirant, the Motto, and the Angel are
one and the same thing. At the moment, that cannot be observed because it
just does not exist in the usual sense of the word, the Great Work has already
been realized; it is precisely the phenomenon of consciousness that creates an
idea of “before” and “after” making the Great Work somehow always hidden
in between. So either you notice it too late, or you are too early. Great Work
is not achieved, it is constantly being achieved, even now, as you read these
words, the Great Work is everpresent in your perception of these letters,
while your consciousness is just a subsequent echo of its nature, and the
shadow of the already occurring phenomenon. And such consciousness of
success is equally illusory as a consciousness of failure; both are reactions of
one and the same occurrence.
The second exercise that can be applied by the Aspirant is a continuous
repetition of his name or a nickname. There occurs a moment of monotony
during the endless repetition of the name out loud, when the Aspirant
completely loses the meaning of it all, and where consciousness enters into a
specific type of trance. That wonderful moment is well known to children, as
this technique is one of the favorite games during childhood. It is necessary
to repeat the name out loud in a continuous, monotone manner, maintaining
the same tempo, doing so without any expectations, and when this specific
state of nonsense appears within the mind, one is to seize the feeling of the
Self, keeping it squeezed as it wriggles with all its power. Right then, the
Aspirant will gently feel the new sensation that is above all other senses. This
specific feeling is something special that will get revealed further in the
Grade of a Neophyte, but for now, it remains for us to map this feeling well
and note it into the Diary. Not as a success, nor as an isolated experiment, but
only as a short statement. And this mild feeling should be forgotten as soon
as possible. For it will begin to flow among the unconscious currents of the
Aspirant, breaking the course of his mind in a way that he will later, as an
Adept, apply it in His Great Work.
The Motto should not be original at all costs; originality is already
present in you by virtue of you being born as unique. What is necessary now
is to pour out the name from the mold of your nature. The effort towards
originality is the blasphemy of the worst kind. Therefore, it is quite an
ungrateful event to sit down and to think about what you want to be.
Although it is a valid way, ask yourself about the nature of what you already
are and then simply name it accordingly; choose a god, an angel, a demon, a
color or a number that corresponds to it. You do not need to be something as
much as that something needs to be you. This is not the ultimate test; it will
improve and become sophisticated through the Grades in the same way the
progress through the Grades brings the Aspirant closer to the Angel. Once
again, twice, many times over, the Aspirant must know that the adoption of
the Motto is his first failure in the Great Work. But as much as it is a failure,
it is a misstep in nothing other than the Great Work, and that is the magical
link of the most exalted kind.
The Motto is a metaphor of Will. As the Aspirant is onomatopoeia of
his Angel.
CHAPTER SEVEN
 ROBE

The Robe occupies an exceptional position in the Aspirant’s journey

partly because it is present from the very first day of his Probation. No other
magical aid is used so frequently as the Robe, and within the Golden Dawn
domain no other weapon can simultaneously imply the current Grade and the
ultimate goal – which is always and only the Knowledge and Conversation of
the Holy Guardian Angel. Indeed, if we but look at each individual Grade, we
can notice that within the scope of his task the Aspirant is to approach the
creation of magical items inherent to such a Grade, and once initially
constructed, they rarely change. The Robe is modified during each Grade, but
its essence which carries the Aspirant deeper within the Order remains the
same. As the Robe is just a curtain which is being spread by his work, as that
spreading is the only genuine work, the opening of the veil before the LVX
itself, in the very moment of his Knowledge and Conversation. We will say
that what prism does with light, the Robe does with the LVX, in the way the
Aspirant always gets as much light as he needs to see.
The Probationer's Robe is actually a large Tau cross made of white silk
with golden lining at the neckline and along the sleeve edges. The red
pentagram is embroidered in the front, while the six-pointed star rests on the
back – with an upright red and a descending blue triangle, in the center of
which is the golden letter T. The Robe is without the hood because the
Probationer is like a newborn Baby, pure and open to all influences: external
(to which the hexagram on the back is alluding), as well as internal (as
evidenced by the flaming star on the chest).
However, in addition to understanding its practical use and symbolism
of form and color, it is far more important for the Aspirant to realize the
model of thinking that genuinely uses the Robe. Therefore, his mind is the
one who wears it; the Robe is far more than an object of dedication and, in
fact, embodies multiple roles.
The first role has to do with linking the mind to the content of the
operation, in a manner that mantra Yoga does. The distraught by the goal is
always so devastating to the experiment; what we need is a mild pressure of
attention, rather than aggressive concentration. Robe exercises constant
tension on the Aspirant's awareness, yet its appearance is pleasant from
tranquillity that silk or cotton arouse within us. It must be as comfortable as it
is concealed. In this way, regardless of the nature of the operation, the Robe
binds us to one and only aim. It stimulates our senses to the point the external
Ego fails to notice this thief who breaks our censor of reality. The Robe stuns
us as if it deliberately imposes the darkness into the circle so we can better
discern the light; it is a haze that disperses the LVX.
The second role is that of purification; the Robe serves to equally purify
both physical and spiritual aspects of our being. Its gentle material is pleasing
to the entire body, which is naked underneath; this is an allusion to Ovum and
Baby in the Egg. Yet, the highest Robe is always and only your naked body.
Unfortunately, we use it only in exceptional circumstances and in most cases
due to an unavoidable situation. Let us consider that the naked body is almost
always associated with sheer sexuality, rather than our stellar nature, and just
how much trouble we feel we are in whenever we are caught gazing into
one’s bare form. How many of us can really stand naked in front of another
person without feeling discomfort or shame? If you were to attempt to
perform the ritual of the pentagram completely naked, you would discover
how subtle sense of strangeness and novelty, which emerge in the place of
your usual performance, can unveil the most wonderful clue compelling you
to keep on following along. The naked body is the Robe of the highest rank;
and just as a ritual garment is capable of radiating with specific energy of its
corresponding sphere, so the naked body itself becomes the Robe of pure
light, fashioned from the very material of which the stars are made. In the
end, it is not the body that is naked – but it is the mind itself that is rendered
bare.
The third role is purely energetic in character – it is the medium by
which the Robe channels its primal idea. This energy is derived from the
Robe in as much as the Robe is derived from such energy. Physical Robe is
but a shell comprised of its material, which is pure energy. Although it carries
elemental attributes within the Golden Dawn symbolism, in essence, it is
exclusively and forevermore solar in nature and as such can serve equally
well in every operation. That is to say, the Robe is not merely confined to
certain specific working. Yet, even though the Robe of Practicus can
intensify Qabalistic or Mercurial work, no Robe can bar or slow down
Success itself, as long as the individual is aware of the Great Work. The
Aspirant, cleansed through a ritual bath, dons the Robe; the sensation of a
delicate silk brushing against the skin becomes itself a part of preliminary
work, altering his consciousness and priming it to reap the fruits of the goal.
This very brief occasion – as the Aspirant pulls the sacred garb over his head,
beautiful and magnificent – evokes the notion that such instance is more
valuable than the work itself as if it is the only work that could possibly be at
that moment.
The fourth role is of the highest rank as it bears witness to a magical
link taking place, the one which forevermore associates our being to the
Knowledge and Conversation. We are the Conversation, our Robe is the
Knowledge. One goes with another, and one without the other cannot be. As
you move, so does the Robe move – it is one movement and one Will,
inasmuch as the Angel and the Aspirant are One. But you need to consider
this just as a conceptual idea, it does not mean that your practice necessarily
has to commence while wearing the Robe. Our mind is our only polygon for
work; if we fail to understand the essence of the idea that we are dealing with
here, then we do not deserve anything from our Art. It is far more important
to grasp the governing principles herein, even though we never perform
anything under the Robe, than to have the most elaborate ornament
embroidered on the Robe of the Adeptus Exemptus, fashioned from the most
precious of silks, yet without possessing any true understanding. And if you
understand the substance of the Robe, it is completely irrelevant whether you
will actually wear it.
A model of thinking that truly tailors the Robe, unlike tailor's needles
and threads, is the same one that defines a magician's circle. If that circle is
the vastness of his work, the Robe is the vastness of his senses. It is the
outermost membrane of the magician and represents a mediator between his
body, which he promptly feels, and the universe in which he has no sense at
all. The Robe is an interpreter, a transformer between two different realities,
transmitting one and the same force into two different planes, in a manner
that it releases that which is useful while withholding whatever is
incompatible.
The Robe, similar to magician's circle, describes one’s aspiration
towards infinity. The circle around the magician determines the field of his
action, as well as his security and protection. But isn't the circle endless? Is
there anything “else” around the circle? Your limitation and your fears are
pressing the circle, puncture it, piercing it, assault it, making it a symbol of
restriction instead of infinity. Is not the true nature of consciousness in the
continuous expansion? As you work and advance, you will also expand your
circle. And so your Robe will fall over all things, just like the light of LVX
does.
If the Circle around the magician is the limit of his perceptible
Universe, then the Probationer is dwelling on the planet Earth, his Circle of
work is a starry sky, while his Robe is the atmosphere of that Earth which
protects him from the outside influence while giving him life. The Robe is a
constant reminder of a subtle body around him and of a fact that, akin to the
layers of an onion, he contains many layers of refined existence.
Equally, the Motto and the Robe are preparing the Aspirant for more
significant and distinct ventures, such as the fashioning of his elemental
weapons that he is to begin the construction of within his commitment as a
Neophyte, and further on. But before the Aspirant, as the knight of the Grail,
is to make his weapons, he must first acquire brilliant armor and earn the title
of a knight, which is actually construction of the Robe and choosing of the
Motto.
It is important always to remember that Probationer's Robe is similar
with the Robe of Adeptus Minor. The term similar is quite inconvenient;
what we mean to say is that it is one and the same Robe, and no other. These
Robes are not similar, rather it is the One Robe the entire time, and that is the
immense difference. Essentially, the Probationer is the Adept. After all,
Adeptus Minor becomes a child, as much as the Probationer remains a child.
Therein lies the ultimate trick of the mind, which is the main contributor to
the construction of the Grades. Even as the Robes of both the Probationer and
Adeptus Minor are interchangeable, although it can be concluded that – as a
reminder to the former to his Knowledge and Conversation, his true urge in
the Order which he is to accomplish – it has one much deeper association: he
has nothing new to discover but to wake within himself.
The Angel is not above, nor is he within the Aspirant. The Aspirant
himself is the Angel, as much as the Angel is an Aspirant, and the Robe of
Probationer refers to the meditation about this. Thus, the Robe is the highest
aspect of Jnana Yoga. It is the symbol of Oneness; it is the Aim, not the
Method. Not the One who attains, but the One that has already been attained.
CHAPTER EIGHT
 PASTOR'S LOVELY TROUBLE
The neighbor's cow is suffering from some contagious disease. How would you set up
the work to discover the cause; if the reason is an enchantment, how to detect causer,
and how to continue to eliminate the evil?

This is one of the questions that can be found inside the Probationer's
exam and in which it is necessary to show the authenticity of the opinion, so
essential for this Grade. It is actually a trick question, in which it is neither
required nor expected to find a perfect solution. What is being asked is a
model of thinking that would eventually point to a suitable and prodigious
mind of the candidate.
It is necessary to study all possible cases in order to realize all
connections and to perceive the magical link, to focus on what is required,
and ultimately to expose the solution. At the very beginning, you will derive
critical concepts from the context of the task. Understanding their function
affects the understanding of what is actually being sought.
We will underline all the words in the task that needs to be clarified
supremely:

The neighbor's cow is suffering from some contagious disease. How would you set up
the work to discover the cause; if the reason is an enchantment, how to detect causer,
and how to continue to eliminate the evil?

First, it is a disease. It is some contagious disease, and this information

can be an important link in the detection of the causer, as well as in finding
the cure. It is essential to clarify what kind of specific disease it is. The fact
that it is an infection can be precious because every infection requires a
mediator or transmitter.
Second, discovering the cause is required. It is directly related to the
consequence, which is the illness from the infectious disease. It is stated in
advance that there is a possibility that the reason for the cause is an
enchantment.
Third, we should not mix enchantment with the cause. Enchantment is
the reason, the way the cause starts. It is whipped cream on the cake of this
whole masquerade.
 Fourth, detection of the causer is also required. It will be undoubtedly
connected to the cause of the disease itself.
The fifth, crucial thing is to be found at the very end. We are
determined to find a way to eliminate evil. On this last, we will deal first,
especially since this point tends to slip from the mind. Here lies the essence
and it is responsible for the whole problem. We need to find what kind of evil
is happening. What is really evil in this case? We start from the fact that evil
is a manifestation of a relationship that is not based on True Nature.
Accordingly, a sick cow cannot suffer from a good or a bad cause, but from a
cause that is incompatible with the nature of its true being. Here we come to
the key: is it evil that the cow is sick? Or is it evil that it is still alive? Evil is
the hardest to discover, but the easiest to eliminate. If the disease is a
consequence of nature, then the evil would be curing the cow. What is clearly
being asked from us is that evil must be eliminated.

First case
In the first case, the causer's goal is the neighbor, not a cow. One of the
possible manifestations of evil is cow's disease being a part of a neighbor's
link; therefore, the condition for this specific case is the existence of an
important connection between neighbor and the cow. Here is what can
happen: the causer in the human form wants evil for the neighbor, so he
comes up with an idea to poison his cow. In the case of enchantment, causer
creates disease by magical means. In both cases, the neighbor is related to the
cow. The causer affects the cow because he knows that the neighbor will feel
that action on his own being. Neighbor needs a cow, without it he would
suffer.

Second case
Here, the causer is directly targeted towards a cow, without neighbor as
a mediator. Disease as a cause has the most obvious reason. The causer is a
virus. The biological consequences are quite possible; the cow simply got
sick. However, we come to the emergence of the fifth actor, which is the pre-
cause. It brings the possibility of acting on a virus which later acts on a cow,
thus representing the first case again. The virus or a cow is not important
here, but the connection between pre-cause and a virus. This example is one
of many possibilities, but every other should be handled in the same way.
Detect a pre-cause and then find the link between that and the “visible and
real” cause.

Third case
In this ultimately silly case, the essence rests in the identity of neighbor
and the causer. In other words, the neighbor is the causer. His actions have
brought disease to a cow, and it is necessary to determine the nature of such
actions. “Evil” ceases with the activity of the neighbor, since enchantment
derives from him. His unbalanced and sufficiently strong aspiration exposes
on the weakest and to him a significant point, on his cow. Here is what can
happen: the neighbor is envious on his uncle because he has healthier and
better cows than him. His uncle works in harmony with nature, therefore his
cows are healthy and strong. Our neighbor is overcrowded from negative
thoughts and every day he curses and slanders his uncle with the desire that
his cows get ill. But the uncle is outside of every curse; he is balanced; he
acts in harmony with his will and nature. That is inviolate. The neighbor
again has a strong urge to see how the cow gets ill and that is also inviolate.
The universe instantly creates a solution in the disease of the cow, but from
the neighbor's. His wicked mind only sees the disease as important; an epithet
is more important than a noun. In the neighbor's case, the force was enormous
but without grounding. Negative thoughts can be easily directed and
intensified by a special kind of magical operation, which is often found in a
rural setting.

Solution
Detection of the cause of an infectious disease requires a clean and
proper medical examination. The nature of the infection has its proper
method of treatment. At the same time, the history of events is being
investigated; information about a neighbor, his neighbors, friends and foes,
the entire history of their relationships should be determined, making the
final judgment on whether there is envy, malice or a similar factor.
In the case of enchantment, one must take into consideration the
phenomenon of exaggeration and superstition. Enchantment can easily be the
product and projection of ignorance and poor understanding of elementary
facts. The causer probably expresses envy and open divergence with the
neighbor. The possibility of quarrel and conflict that neighbor has or has had
in the past time with some other neighbor should also be investigated. There
is a strong possibility that causer used magic earlier, studying recent events in
a neighbor's environment can point to this case. Above all, one should take
into account the existence of the third case, which we have already explained
before.
If the causer is not determined by these means, we are left to employ the
method of the causer, which is magic. In our case, finding a magical link is
simple, and it is represented by the cow. By acting on a cow, we can extort a
causer to discover itself. Magical protection of the cow should be one of
priority, such as creating a mirror that returns the pressure to the one who
exerted it. The method here depends on the inventiveness, and it is possible to
perform it in a thousand different ways. From the moment we have secured
the cow with magical protection, one should begin with careful observation
of the environment because soon, the same or similar infectious disease is
expected to appear in the causer. That would be enough for detecting the
causative aspect.
Once it is discovered, “evil” is eliminated more easily. In doing so, one
should take into account the definition of evil, and particularly in the third
case. The act triggered by the causer can be short or long breath. In the case
of a short one, the cow should be adequately cured according to the nature of
the disease. The act is magical, but it is directed to the onset of the disease,
and it will stop when the disease is cured. If it is a long breath, such as the act
of damnation, then it is appropriate to create the effect of a boomerang. The
most common school example of a magical mirror can give an excellent
result. What is important here is to move the force away from the cow
directly to the causer. In any case, detecting the causer and acting in order so
he can find out that he is discovered can lead to the complete cessation of all
his actions.
In the end, an honest conversation can resolve all disagreements.
Smallville business.
CHAPTER NINE
 PYRAMIDOS
We are biased to the Truth, in which we believe and for which we live
in the conviction that every event is a projection of that truth. Finally, our
experience of truth is only a projection of its influence, so it is precisely the
truth that I am talking about now. Even if it were not in the form we could
understand in our minds, even if it did not exist at all, it would still be
precisely that truth, which does not exist. Why then we named it the truth
when its nature is neither true nor false? I do not know.
Our experience of initiation is one of the strongest levers of our inner
change, which is shown in each Aspirant in a different, self-unique way.
Initiation is more particular than any particularity, and as each one of us is
unique, so is our initiation peculiar and just its own. Still, as much every
consciousness is absurd without initiation, so is the initiation pointless
without the Self. On the one hand, it can be said that we were initiated at the
moment when we were born, that we touched the enlightenment at the very
moment we fell. Initiation is a phenomenon of time in fact, not
consciousness; that is, the discovery of all dimensions of the Universe in all
its possible and impossible variants.
The essence of each act is the integration of all its structures into the
entirety of the Great Work; life itself is composed of only one movement that
brings a true change – initiation. What we want to say here is that initiation is
not a straightforward process; moreover, it involves a series of minor, indirect
changes that integrated altogether bring great transformation. However, each
Aspirant should bear in mind the nature of initiation must be always simple
and above all natural for every consciousness.
Initiation is pointless without experience as much experience is
meaningless without initiation. Each of your experiences is the initiation as
much as in every feeling of yours are hiding the Knowledge and
Conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel. Your experience of initiation,
hunting you then as it is hunting you now, makes you do unusual things,
which are not learned, which are not decent. It is essential that you penetrate
the meaning of those words – to realize that your experience of Initiation is
absurd and that each of these three words is one of the three aggregate states
of the same idea. It is yours because it is You, experience because it is direct
and immediate and it concerns only Yourself, Initiation because it is only
Yours. There is You, there is Yourself, and there is Yours. You, Yourself and
Yours – a name, a surname and a nickname of an Ego. Therefore, your
experience of Initiation is better known as: Know Your Self. Within our great
Order, there is an initiation; which is wrong, because it is initiation and
nothing else but that. Every Aspirant within his Great Work is experiencing a
great paradox, which is the realization that he cannot go through the initiation
unless he is initiated already. But it seems that the work itself completely
resolves this problem; in fact, it can be said that the thing is so simple that in
all its simplicity it is arduous. The Aspirant does not need to project the
essence of this problem before time, but to leave himself to the principles on
which his Grade is built upon.
The greatest initiation is life and life in death. There is no other work
than these two things, and our entire art is just a mere test of our courage to
accept this initiation. However, we need to be bent by the fact that a small
number of man are truly aware of what life is. How can one even rejoice for
the end of the road, or even for being on the road if he is unaware of where he
is going at all? Firstly, one needs to determine what these words mean to him:
life and death, what they evoke and what kind of experience they bring.
Therefore, life is not initiation, living is an initiation, and the difference
between this is a comparison between the day and night. But, let us leave
aside these customs of Sebek and devote ourselves to the new customs of
Ibis, as it is stated in the "Book of the Heart girt with a Serpent."
No one was born to be initiated but is initiated because he was born.
Yet, at one moment in our lives, apparently random and unforeseen, the
initiation will take us under its own, starting to fulfill without even asking. Its
efficiency is faster than its truth, which is why it is so unique and completely
independent from the intelligence of the man. In addition to all other aids that
he will surely find on his path, the Probationer has two essential weapons
which are: one weapon for attack and one for defense. For defense, it will be
truthfulness; the highest virtue of all and attribute of Parsifal. How powerful
is he who lives with the truth of the world, who counts the kisses of lovely
Adonai. For attack, he will need nothing else than love; only love connects
the incompatible, only love is possible when everything else is hopeless.
And, only love crashes every possible defense, for defense from love is none.
 Within our Order, there are only two official initiations, and both,
regardless of the situation in the past, are exclusively given in the form of
self-initiation. Their full value is in the Aspirant's work with himself, as the
perfection of the ritual does not lie in the perfection of its performance for it
is unattainable. At the end of his Probation, if he satisfied all the elements of
his Grade, the Probationer is given to pass the Ritual of the Pyramid, or Liber
DCLXXI vel Pyramidos, which confirms him as a Neophyte. In the same
way, a Neophyte passes through the Ritual CXX, of Passage through the
Duat, or Liber Cadaveris, which establishes him as a Zelator. It would be
wrong to assume whether the ritual of the Pyramid is the final act of the
Probationer, or it is the introductory chapter of a Neophyte. Perhaps both
conclusions are equally correct. These rituals contain the mysteries that an
Aspirant's unconscious will roll and shape further during the Grades, and it
cannot be said with certainty what kind of performance would be considered
as appropriate.
The ritual of the Pyramid, or Pyramidos hereinafter, is built on the basis
of the dramatic ritual, where an Aspirant assumes specific godly forms and
passes through a certain process of transformation. This process of change
will accompany him all along the region of the Golden Dawn, to the
achievement of the Adeptus Minor. This process will, of course, only modify
its form, depending on the Grade, but the same essence is present both in the
Probationer and in the Philosophus; it is about a subtle, inner experience that
initiates a major change, soon to be realized. It should not be confused with
Liber ThROA, which is a group ritual of initiation in which, besides the
initiate, roles also have officers of the Order. But is there anyone else in the
great Pyramid, except an Aspirant? Is he not all alone, is the Pyramid not
constructed for him and himself only? Above all, the Aspirant should
comprehend the formula and essence of the ritual, and that his contemplation
on all this should be part of his work on the Grade.
Many discussions were conducted around the secret word of a
Neophyte. What can be found in public records is the first and the last letter
of that word, and the numerical value of 93. M....M. Although every careful
researcher will find how it was derived, it is more important to outline the
principle based on which the whole thing works. The word is never
pronounced in the outer, and it is never transmitted in the way as it is done
with other words. Above all, one should take into account that M....M is not a
word but a formula, which only represents or resembles a subtle inner story,
and it is necessary to obtain it through one’s Zelator in its proper form. The
secret word is the axis of the whole of this initiation, which is fully nourished
by the vibration of that word. It never gets transmitted, except to the
Neophyte of the A ∴ A ∴ and there are strong reasons why it is so. First
and foremost, the very process of finding this word starts much earlier than in
Pyramidos, if nothing else then precisely at this point, now reading these
words represents the achievement and valuable process by itself. The very
word is the mental arabesque about settling the Aspirant's soul inside the
Pyramid, imprinting his mind into its monumental heart. This word is the
formula of conversion of two entirely different currencies; those elemental
and those spiritual ones. This word is a translator, which ‫ יהוה‬turns into
‫יהשו ה‬, it is a formula that explains life itself. This word, like magical words
of the old times used by a necromancer to raise the dead, will imprint the soul
into dead things and make them alive. It is symbolically responsible for our
true awakening, our true initiation. And as every Pyramid is a tomb of the
body, so it is equally a cradle of the soul. And here, a born man occupies the
place of other unborn.
The word is not hiding from the Probationer, but from “his” Binah, and
we will have an opportunity to discuss more about this brilliant tale later. It
can be openly noticed that phenomenon of the words in the A ∴ A ∴ has a
very special place. As a Neophyte, the Aspirant receives from his Zelator the
hidden word, then, as an accomplished Adept he receives the name of his
Angel, and finally, as Magus, he obtains the word of Æon. All three Grades
are pervaded by acceptance of certain words which fulfill the utmost domains
of human existence, the words under which the whole Universe shakes, as the
ether through which these vibrations are transmitted, from Yesod to
Chokmah.
The entire formula is somewise shown in Liber HHH, in what is
referred to as the first meditation (called MMM). We can freely interpret that
this practice in meditational aspect is identical to the dramatic form of the
Pyramidos and that both practices are actually synonymous for the same
experience. Meditation practice from Liber HHH is analogous to the
Pyramidos, yet it should be noticed that it is given only at the Grade of a
Zelator. It is assumed that the Probationer, or the future Neophyte, is not even
intended to understand the secret word except that it may be in possession of
its form, he is still far from understanding the nature of its vibration.

We will now include the first meditation from Liber HHH, in order to
get a deeper understanding of the formula of this magick.

LIBER HHH
SVB FIGVRA CCCXLI

Continet capitula tria: MMM, AAA, et SSS

I
MMM

I remember a certain holy day in the dusk of the Year, in the dusk of the Equinox of Osiris, when first I
beheld thee visibly; when first the dreadful issue was fought out; when the Ibis-headed One charmed
away the strife. I remember thy first kiss, even as a maiden should. Nor in the dark byways was there
another: thy kisses abide.
– Liber Lapidis Lazuli
0. Be seated in thine Asana, wearing the robe of a Neophyte, the hood drawn.
1. It is night, heavy and hot, there are no stars. Not one breath of wind stirs the surface of the
sea, that is thou. No fish play in thy depths.
2. Let a Breath rise and ruffle the waters. This also thou shalt feel playing upon thy skin. It
will disturb thy meditation twice or thrice, after which thou shouldst have conquered this
distraction. But unless thou first feel it, that Breath hath not arisen.
3. Next, the night is riven by the lightning flash. This also shalt thou feel in thy body, which
shall shiver and leap with the shock, and that also must both be suffered and overcome.
4. After the lightning flash, resteth in the zenith a minute point of light. And that light shall
radiate until a right cone be established upon the sea, and it is day.
With this thy body shall be rigid, automatically; and this shalt thou let endure, withdrawing
thyself into thine heart in the form of an upright Egg of blackness; and therein shalt thou
abide for a space.
5. When all this is perfectly and easily performed at will, let the aspirant figure to himself a
struggle with the whole force of the Universe. In this he is only saved by his minuteness.
But in the end he is overcome by Death, who covers him with a black cross.
Let his body fall supine with arms outstretched.
6. So lying, let him aspire fervently unto the Holy Guardian Angel.
7. Now let him resume his former posture.
Two and twenty times shall he figure to himself that he is bitten by a serpent, feeling even
in his body the poison thereof. And let each bite be healed by an eagle or hawk, spreading
its wings above his head, and dropping thereupon a healing dew. But let the last bite be so
terrible a pang at the nape of the neck that he seemeth to die, and let the healing dew be of
such virtue that he leapeth to his feet.
 8. Let there be now placed within his egg a red cross, then a green cross, then a golden cross,
then a silver cross; or those things which these shadow forth. Herein is silence; for he that
hath rightly performed the meditation will understand the inner meaning hereof, and it shall
serve as a test of himself and his fellows.
9. Let him now remain in the Pyramid or Cone of Light, as an Egg, but no more of blackness.
10. Then let his body be in the position of the Hanged Man, and let him aspire with all his
force unto the Holy Guardian Angel.
11. The grace having been granted unto him, let him partake mystically of the Eucharist of the
Five Elements and let him proclaim Light in Extension; yea, let him proclaim Light in
Extension.

There are two places in this meditation that are crucial, giving a clear
connection with the Pyramidos; it is inside the seventh point – the part with
22 snake bites, and the eighth point – as a mystery of colored crosses. In
MMM, 22 bites of Serpent are identical to the 22 refrains of Pyramidos
where the Aspirant symbolically passes through 22 paths, each time stating:
“I am under the Shadow of the Wings,” apparently alluding to the influence
of Adonai over Paroketh. In MMM meditation, in a similar way to
Pyramidos, the same wings of his own Angel are now wings of the falcon,
which heals the Aspirant 22 times from the Serpents bites.

LIBER PYRAMIDOS:
“I am a fool, a flutterer!
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am a liar & a sorcerer.
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am so fickle that I scorn the bridle.
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am unchaste, voluptuous and idle.
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!”
… (22 times altogether)

LIBER HHH
Two and twenty times shall he figure to himself that he is bitten by a serpent,
feeling even in his body the poison thereof. And let each bite be healed by an
eagle or hawk, spreading its wings above his head, and dropping thereupon a
healing dew.

The Pyramidos parallel with the MMM meditation reveals much deeper
connections than at first glance. Both things point to the same formula, and it
can be said with certainty that there is not enough praise for each moment of
the Aspirant's commitment towards these sublime practices.
 Finally, the mystery of MMM crosses points to the secret word in a way
that “it shall serve as a test of himself and his fellows.”[5] The crosses and
their colors give us an interesting numerical value if we join Paths and
Sephiroth in a certain compound. These colors are black, red, green, gold and
silver. One of interesting solution could be: Tau ‫( ת‬32) + Tzaddi ‫( צ‬28) +
Daleth ‫( ד‬14) + Tiphareth ☉ (6) + Gimel ‫( ג‬13) = 93. Compare with
M...M, which is a secret word of the Neophyte with the same gematrical
value. Black for Tau, red for Tzaddi and the Emperor, green for Daleth and
the Empress, golden for Tiphareth, silver for Gimel and the High Priestess.
This silver is then again black, like the path of the High Priestess, who
crossed the desert and steps into the blackness of the Abyss. And so the word
begins and ends with the blackness; first of Malkuth, and then from the
darkness of Pan, it raises awareness of the alchemical principles along the
Tree of Life. It is easy to notice that in this equation only Tiphareth is the
Sephira while the other values are represented by the Paths: the Universe, the
Emperor, the Empress, and the High Priestess. This is such an important and
powerful riddle that each Aspirant should devote time of his Grade for the
careful and detailed study.
This beautiful word reflects in more than a remarkable way the specific
feeling that the Neophyte receives, the feeling about the illusion of reality,
and even more – the reality of illusion; he equally feels the attraction of the
Self, but also the attraction of the mother Earth and the great Binah. Equally
terrible, these two forces are doing retaliation on him, and drag his being to
the limit of his endurance. The word describes what the Probationer is
already beginning to feel very well; terrible pressure on his soul, the feeling
as if he is doing something wrong and unbearable sense that he detours from
the path. Indeed he is detouring, but from the path of illusion and slavery, and
his change in trajectory is the one which creates a distorted experience of
going the wrong way. The Neophyte begins what is still preparing for the
Probationer because the great and terrible Mother[6] , for now, has only a
threat and a rebuke for her child, which is not yet officially on his feet. The
Probationer is still not conscious and directly on the path, as the Neophyte
will be, and pressure of reality in him produces the feeling that he will
undoubtedly fall. Of course, that depends from case to case, but if it is
necessary to say something right on this topic is that the worst thing that can
happen to the Probationer is that nothing happens.
 If the Aspirant looks closer to the secret word of the Neophyte, he will
notice that the beginning and the end of the formula are the same, as the
blackness of Malkuth and the depths of Binah. But the sense of equality of
these two terms is precisely what creates trouble for him and what makes
Probation so turbulent. There is nothing equal in these things, and as long as
he realizes that each event in his life is the grip of a serpent around his heart
and that every occurrence is dialogue of the Angel with his own soul; he will
find joy in every temptation and his Grade serving as polishing stone of his
true nature. Let him know that this heavy pressure of temptation is the
ripping of his heart, the grip around his soul that drains everything from him,
even love, until only one thing remains. Himself.
The beginning and the end of the formula, the blackness of Malkuth and
Binah, the first indicating the existence of nonentity, the second the nonentity
of existence. Malkuth is so real in its illusion, while Binah's transiency is the
one that creates an utterly persistent disturbance for the Ego.
The dark night of the soul that wraps around the Aspirant, giving the
meaning to the whole Probation, conceals a unique phenomenon in our work
which is often revealed to the Neophyte. Adonai. In the particular case in the
entire Order, the Holy Guardian Angel performs a direct attack on the
Aspirant's Ego and appears partly, in the form of a dream, sudden insight,
experience or a strange occurrence of extremely short duration. And all that
will happen then is a rebellion of our Shadow towards this divine doing.
What we can openly say is that the whole bitter feeling of Probation is
actually the natural chemical reaction of the soul before the appearance of the
Angel, in the way that same soul does not spoil anything from the first kiss.
The effect of specious downfall is well known to Aspirants as the IAO
formula, or the IsisApophisOsiris formula and there is something to be said
about it. This is by no means an old-æonic formula, as it can be heard in
today's Thelemic world too often. On the contrary, each formula is timeless,
above æonic; what is old or new can only exist in our mind. Each formula is
inherently new by itself, as long as our mind applies it to its own and no other
benefit. Each formula had its purpose and nature and as such is always the
reward of the Ra-Hoor-Khuit. In every one of our actions from buying
newspapers or watching movies, to the most profound rituals within our
Order, we can always find parts of our being that are old-aeonic, and they are
those that we need to transform and convert to the light. They, and not the
formulas, are old-aeonic, and they are those which fall under the “direful
judgments of Ra Hoor Khuit!” Rituals cannot be old nor can be outdated. But
our mind and performance can.
It is extremely important to consider the phenomenon of the IAO
formula in this stage of the work. Although it is quite appropriately
represented by the myth of Osiris and Isis, above all, it is the instruction on
the lever of our mind and is more a matter of psychotherapy than all of the
pantheons together. Briefly, after each positive insight, there is a negative fall
and the appearance of a dark temptation that one can compare with the
midnight darkness. And indeed, then as if all the heavens were against us and
as if each aphrodisiac was losing its influence at its most crucial moment.
Finally, the stage of transcendence follows, which resembles the victorious
arrival of the solar disk that scattered all previous darkness. The IAO formula
undoubtedly takes an exceptional place in the life of the Probationer and
Neophyte, but it is important to realize that someone can have this process to
a lesser or greater extent, as much as some other may not have it at all; and
thinking about it should never cause a trigger for creating this phenomenon.
From this place, we can openly say that the core, the essence and the
importance of the IAO formula are in the occurrence of a negative transfer
within our being, every time the light of new joy arises. And when a girl
meets a beautiful fellow at dinner, she can quite openly expect something to
go wrong the very next day. Once we buy a new car, the next day we notice
something completely better in another, when we finally reach the ideal place
for a long-awaited vacation, yet in a couple of days, we feel strangely
inexplicable discomfort in the found paradise. In other words, in every
current joy is a seed of forthcoming sorrow. Dragged by one fantastic
mechanism, the Aspirant's mind projects a curve that goes downwards,
weakening his enthusiasm to the point that the same exercise in the same
circumstances always has worse result during the second performance. Once
when you eagerly try the ritual in a new way, once you discover with
excitement what you need to improve, you will experience a unique
phenomenon in all your joy and wisdom. Disappointment. So brilliant, when
everything comes to its place and you fly ecstatically to the heaven with pure
success, that same heaven cruelly closes before you as if you did not
understand anything or as someone deliberately played with you some
corrupted and evil game.
 In this place, we should not surrender to the obvious connection with
the alchemical principles of the First Matter and the Gold, which the
Aspirant, as Zelator, will learn to its fullest detail. Instead, we will keep on
this peculiar phenomenon of darkness, once our being is already bathed in the
light, and each time again, wondering where this incomprehensible darkness
is coming from. But the answer is so enlightening as the experience of the
Knowledge and Conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel, by the fact that
both things point to the same place. You. The mechanism is quite simple,
which does not apply to the solution.
Within each sensation, every experience, there is one thing that is
identical in all the senses ever, starting from that wonderful feeling when
being thirsty we drink a glass of fresh cold water, or when we sneeze in the
morning, when being hungry we swallow that first bite of food, or when we
scratch a spot that makes us itch. Because it is not that spot that really itches
us. What we call itching is just an illusion of one line which is, like every
other line, determined by two points. Us and our Angel. The one who wants
and the one what is wanted. Knowledge and Conversation. This Will here
and That Angel there. The length of that line, which is limited by two
ultimate points of our existence, allows these points to be perceived as such;
therefore, the itch is by no means related to the feeling of relief as we scratch
that point. This itching leads us to the level of the universe in which we are
the one who itches and the one who scratches at the same time – when the
sensation of itching and feeling of relief become one whole new experience.
When “then” becomes “now”.
And as the itch soothes by directed, purposely will for scratch, so love
manifests in the form of accompanying enjoyment which that scratch brings.
Itch thus becomes just an instrument of will, but instead of itching which
completely disappears in silence, now there is a different, entirely
independent feeling of pleasure and delight of the senses by scratching,
which unites the sensation of relief and sensation of itching, which unifies the
will and the need.
There is only one thing which prevents us from discovering the Self
inside this experience of unity. That what we perceive as time; by the
moment when we are one with the Will, enjoying the feeling of finding that
Will and the feeling of finding the purpose of that Will – in an action that
does not need existence but is there solely because of the Will itself. The
moment when the agony of itching cease, destroying the entire universe by
the decision to simply obey to that unbearable urge to scratch, we declare our
need to scratch as a willing and free action, even so, we are neither willing
nor free from the itch. Somehow, we are out of that urge and inside of it, at
the same time. Thus, at the moment of scratching, we stop being anything
else than the pleasure of that act, and right at the time of disappearance of the
itch, itch itself is the last thing we have ever thought about. We so
delightfully scratch ourselves that we forget we have itching at all, we
become a scratch by stopping to be an itch. And when the urge for scratching
finally passes, as we come back to conscious here and now, only the sense of
elapsed time informs us that the will has been fulfilled and the act has
occurred, in what our mind marks as past. Actually, the mind is always in the
eternal now, using the excuse of the past just as a lever for moving the Will.
That is why we feel pleasure because we feel it now. Because now is feeling
through us. Because now is the only accurate feeling of ours. The Adept
knows that both this itch and the pleasure of scratching are just a different
way of manifesting the same now, different because there is only a different
Will in an endlessly same moment. Will for food, therefore, produces a
present called hunger, which will last as long as you are feeling hungry now.
When you cease to feel hunger, Will moves towards something else, creating
a new present which is measured not by seconds but by feelings. And it is
precisely at that moment of cessation of itching that Ego enters into the new
present, stopping and asking why, stepping out from the same present at that
moment. Why did it have to stop, that wonderful stimulation and enjoyment?
Where the now disappeared? This is the birth of paradox and the phase of the
Apophis inside IAO formula.
The Aspirant can try one very simple and yet powerful technique in
which the whole work is listening to your own words while speaking. Next
time you talk to somebody, put your whole attention on listening to what you
are saying like you are talking to yourself. Just be a listener, not the talker.
Let your tongue speak while your mind listens. This exercise is so remarkable
that a high state of trance can be achieved in seconds; if it is done the right
way, it could lead to the short bliss of the Knowledge and Conversation.
Get yourself at the moment of relief after a sneeze; it is always such an
excellent example of Will. A moment after wonderful stimulus vanishes, at
that moment of silence when irritation stops and when in a few moments you
remain satisfied without any reason. In that golden moment, Ego does not
exist; it is only the echo of Will which resonates through the universe
creating what we call the memory. Ego is every Will which turns around
seeking to see itself, not realizing there is nothing around which is not
already in the Self. We give an utterly banal example, but the principle is
identical in all acts which consist of a sense; we know that there is no single
act in the universe which is not the feeling as such, in the specific sense of the
word. We will be especially careful in separating the terms of feeling and
sense, in which the difference is as much as between the idea of Will and the
Angel. Indeed there is no single event in the universe which is not already the
Knowledge and Conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel. The fact we are
not aware of it does not concern us, but understanding that what we think the
Knowledge and Conversation is and what the Knowledge and Conversation
truly is, is actually not nearly the similar thing.
Here we find an object of our interest. Stimulus cessation time defines
that same stimulus, and it makes the illusion that instead of Will stands the
Ego, who now wants to return that same time in which was the feeling of
unity with Adonai, but refusing to see Adonai in that feeling, and in this new
experience to see Adonai, and in that new time the one new present in which
that same Adonai stands, but more willingly seeking him in something that
“passed.” Instead of gaining the light, now the Aspirant's nature is wrapped
by darkness, thinking that it will be easier to spot the light if only briefly, just
for a moment, it darkens the world. Precisely at that moment, and in terms of
time it is hardly longer than an instant, suffering appears. Finally, a negative
transfer occurs; the urge that can later be turned into our habit of ruining
everything, destroying everything, banishing all the good. This sublime self-
destruction shows us its misery always in the same way that we are living
people and living souls. But in a completely wrong way.
We feel like everything is collapsing, that everything we did well was
just a dream, as if someone is deliberately doing something to us so we can
suffer more. In that temptation, in that dark night of the soul, as it turns
wrong whatever we do, and right then just as if some warm, tenuous voice
from within tells us we should do nothing and that the night will pass by
itself; that we do not need to bring the light because we are the light itself.
That all we need is just to endure and wait for tomorrow. And tomorrow is
already the new Sun-God.
 The Probationer must therefore persevere – persevere and go further.
He should not pass through the night, he should not pass anywhere, but just
not to stay in place, not to look back, he just needs to go further, over there,
wherever, just further, just a step more, an inch more, far from yesterday; his
Oath is to move from his place. Because in this move is something which is
an important part of our grand experiment, from the very beginning to the
farthest corners of the Golden Dawn. That movement, that decision to move
from a place when the whole universe orders otherwise, and more
importantly – the urge for that movement, is the A ∴ A ∴ in its true
essence.
IAO formula and the phase of Apophis is omnipresent with its
mechanism in all aspects of our art, but has a very special place in the life of
a Probationer. At first glance, this Ego mechanism ceases to function with the
accomplishment of an Adeptus Minor, but it does not need to be overly
reminded that shortly after gaining the Knowledge and Conversation, the
Adept confronts with what is described as the “Four Great Princes of Evil.”
Thus, the self-realized Adept in a special, almost exalted way has the
opportunity to revive the same pattern again, though in its purified form. The
Four great Princes of Evil is what our purged nature in Tiphareth projects
through the same mechanism which created the Tetragrammaton in the first
place – the Four elements from which the “world” is made. A distorted
Tetragrammaton, perceived as the idea of “Four Princes of Evil“, that shadow
of the memory of what has been transformed into the gold of Tiphareth, in
the same way is a negative transfer and the aspect of the Apophis inside IAO
formula, we have mentioned before. That memory, which serves not to return
through time, but precisely to create the illusion of time, is the same
mechanism of rejection to capture the wave of the present, and which is
always the same requirement for the creation of neurosis.
Let us go further on some points from Pyramidos. As said, it is a
version of the Liber ThROA ritual adapted to individual performance, or self-
initiation. What is for discussion is how to include the role of Officers, now
when the Initiate is left with himself alone? Is there a room for any “other” in
this place of Initiation, was not the Aspirant left to pass alone the dark night
of the soul? The Aspirant closes himself inside his Pyramid, and what comes
out is everything but “him.”
Therefore, the “proper” performance of ritual can only mean one thing.
That Aspirant brought himself into the balance with his inner urge. He
discovers that “he” will never pass the Initiation. But his soul already
constructs a divine place for itself in the City of the Pyramids, “he” is merely
a figure which serves the ritual.
Who clutches at my throat?
Who pins me down?
Who stabs my heart?
I am unfit to pass
within this Pylon of the Hall of Maat.

“I am unfit,” Aspirant says. “For I am what I am,” in fact, he speaks

within his Pyramid. How much love and understanding is needed for
pronouncing these words in the sacred chamber! This part is one of the most
magnificent moments that the Aspirant carries further into the regions of the
Rose and Cross. “I am unfit to pass” possesses as much power as truth, and it
is a most accurate translation of the name Asar-un-Nefer. At the same time,
three great questions correspond to the three great Initiations: “Who clutches
at my throat?” – the throat is Daath, the Initiation of Abyss. “Who pins me
down?” – down is Malkut, in which the Neophyte is. “Who stabs my heart?”
– the heart represents Tiphareth and the birth of an Adept.
The full effect of the ritual is realized on the astral plane, but as the
Probationer is not yet been foreseen for this venture, it does not mean that it
cannot be performed afterward, with a different understanding and in a
different pattern. He will, of course, pass it again as Zelator in the form of
Liber HHH, in a certain meditation which corresponds to the astral
performance. Because the higher plane is indeed a native residence of this
Initiation, its truth must penetrate down to our souls, thus losing its strength,
such as power cables that transmit energy to large areas and which would not
be useful without transformers. It is good if the Aspirant treats the beginning
of the Pyramidos as ending of Probation, while the end of the ritual is the
beginning of a Neophyte. And right in this transition from the beginning to
the end of the rite, in all what will occur between it, everything that he will
need until his Adeptship is hidden.
It is important to note that there are two Pyramidos; first by which the
Probationer enters the Neophyte and it is performed only once, the second is
the one he is referred to as the once realized Neophyte in order to awaken its
formula completely, and it is performed more often during the Grade. The
ritual of the Pyramid has one value as Initiation, and the other as a method of
raising awareness over the Neophyte's formula. Therefore, each Neophyte
should include this ritual as one of the essential aspects of further work
within his Grade.
The essence of the ritual is contained within one single verse.
Everything that a ritual is and what should be for the Aspirant is in this verse,
magnificent and piercing, so piercing that each Probationer should imprint it
in his mind long after the ritual is performed:
Behold! the Perfect One hath said
These are my body’s Elements
Tried and found pure, a golden spoil

Precisely this transformation is all that we need to scrutinize, in which

the Probationer finds himself as the Neophyte. The Probationer will never
pass the Initiation, no, but a Neophyte is born instead of him as Man of Earth,
and now strives to become the Lover of Thelema, the self-realized Adept of
Sun, self-slain Ankh-f-n-Khonsu.
Perhaps the Aspirant can find the similarity of Pyramidos with the third
degree ritual of Freemasonry; it should be kept in mind that both rituals point
to the one same thing. The ritual only serves through archetypes that act
strongly enough as a stimulant to the Aspirant's soul, in order to know the
required mysteries in an immediate and direct way. Also, personal initiation,
or self-initiation, is always a much more powerful vehicle of Change then the
group work, as is the case of Freemasonry. We will freely and equally greet
both ways, as long as the Aspirant is driven by the influence of the same
Change that transforms his Being in the right direction.
The mystery of Pyramidos is the mystery of the entire universe, the
mystery of all life, which if one could be aware of, then he would even
overcome the Knowledge and Conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel. It is
the truth that you have been lying in the Pyramid all this time, you and
nobody else. Even now as you read these words, all of these millennia, you
are in the same position, inside your tomb, while you are projecting all this in
your mind. All your Grades, all Oaths, tasks and achievements are just a mere
fantasy of the Self which lies in its Pyramid. And all the time while you
project this, dreaming quietly in the tomb, your soul rushes toward stars; yea,
your soul rushes towards stars.
 So go forward and further bravely through the night of Pan!
Dare to reach the aim. Moreover, dare to use the mean. A born man
occupies the place of other unborn. May that thought haunt you further; both
you and your comrades.
 NOTES ON RITUAL OF THE PYRAMID
LIBER DCLXXI vel PYRAMIDOS
Frater Alion ∴

THE BUILDING OF THE PYRAMID[7].

The Magus with Wand. On the Altar are Incense, Fire, Bread, Wine, the
Chain, the Scourge, the Dagger and the Oil. In his Left Hand the Bell he
taketh:

Hail! Asi! Hail, Hoor-Apep! Let

The Silence speech beget!

Two Strokes on Bell. Banishing Spiral Dance:

The Words against the Son of Night

Tahuti speaketh in the Light[8].
Knowledge and Power, twin warriors[9], shake
The Invisible; They roll asunder
The Darkness; Matter shines[10], a snake[11].
Sebek is smitten by the thunder.
The Light breaks forth from under.

He goes to the West, in the Centre of the Base of the Triangle of Θωθ ( ‫) מ‬,
Asi ( ‫) א‬, and Hoor ( ‫) ש‬:

O Thou, the Apex of the Plane,

With Ibis Head and Phoenix Wand
And Wings of Night[12]! Whose serpents strain
Their bodies, bounding the Beyond.
Thou in the Light and in the Night
 Art One, above their moving might[13]!

He lays the Wand, etc., on the altar, uses the Scourge on his buttocks, cuts a
cross with the Dagger upon his Breast and tightens the Chain of the Bell
about his forehead, saying:

The Lustral Water[14]! Smite thy flood

Through me lymph, marrow and blood!

Anointing the Wounds, say:

The Fire Informing! Let the Oil

Balance, assain, assoil[15]!

The Invoking Spiral Dance[16]:

So Life takes Fire from Death, and runs

whirling amid the Suns.
Hail, Asi! Pace the Path, bind on
the girdle of the Starry One[17]!

Sign of the Enterer.

Homage to Thee, Lord of the Word!

Sign of Silence.

Lord of the Silence, Homage to Thee!

Repeat both Signs.

Lord, we adore Thee, still and stirred,

Beyond Infinity.

The Secret Word[18]. (Blue, orange, yellow-green, yellow, orange, blue)

L A Sh T A L
Me Tz Te Be Tz M
MUAUM
Me Ha Be He M
ABMN
L A Sh T A L

Bell.

For from the Silence of the Wand

Unto the Speaking of the Sword,
And back again to the Beyond,
This is the toil and the Reward.
This is the Path of Hua-Ho!
This is the Path of ΙΑΩ[19].

Bell.

Hail Asi! Hail, Thou Wanded Wheel[20]!

Alpha and Delta kissed and came
For Five[21] that feed the Flame.

Bell.

Hail, Hoor-Apep[22]! Thou Sword of Steel!

Alpha and Delta and Epsilon
Met in the Shadow of the Pylon[23]
And in Iota[24] did proclaim
That tenfold core and crown of flame.
Hail, Hoor-Apep! Unspoken Name!

Thus is the Great Pyramid duly builded[25].

INITIATION[26]
The First Pylon
 I know not who I am;
I know not whence I came;
I know not whither I go;
I seek, but what, I do not know[27]!
I am blind and bound; but I
Have heard[28] one cry
Ring through Eternity;
Arise and follow me!

The Candidate still, bound and hoodwinked:

Asar Un-nefer[29]! I invoke

The Fourfold Horror of the Smoke.
Unloose the Pit! by the dread Word
of Power that Set-Typhon hath heard.
SAZAZ SAZAZ ADNATSAN SAZAZ[30]
(Pronounce this backwards. But it is very dangerous. It opens the Gates of
Hell.)

The Fear of Darkness and of Death.

The Fear of Water and of Fire
The Fear of the Chasm and the Chain
The Fear of Hell and the dead Breath[31].
The Fear of Him, the Demon dire[32]
That on the Threshold of the Inane
Stands with His Dragon Fear to slay
The Pilgrim of the Way.
Thus I pass by with force and care,
Advance with Fortitude and Wit[33],
In the straight Path, or else their snare
Were surely Infinite.

The Passing of the Second Pylon

(Stagger and fall back to earth. Suit action to words.)
 Asar! Who clutches at my throat?
Who pins me down? Who stabs my heart?
I am unfit to pass within[34]
This Pylon of the Hall of Maat.

(Rubric as before)

The Lustral Water[35]! Let thy flood

Cleanse me, lymph, marrow, and blood[36]!
The Scourge, the Dagger and the Chain

Purge body, breast and brain[37]!

The Fire Informing! Let the Oil

Balance, assain, assoil[38]!

Still, in corpse-position[39]:

For I am come with all this pain

To ask admission to the Shrine.
I know not why. I ask in vain
Unless it be that I am Thine.
I am Mentu his truth-telling brother,
Who was Master of Thebes from my Birth:.
O heart of me! heart of my mother!
O Heart that I had upon Earth!
Stand not Thou up against me, a Witness!
Oppose me not, Judge, in my Quest[40]!
Accuse me not now of Unfitness
Before the great God, the dread Lord of the West!

(Change this part to your own motto. Work the scansion correctly.):

Speak fair words for ___________. May he flourish

In the place of the weighing of hearts[41].
By the Marsh of the dead, where the crocodiles nourish
Their lives on the lost, where the Serpent[42] upstarts.
For though I be joined to the Earth,
In the Innermost Shrine of Heaven[43] am I.
I was Master of Thebes from my Birth;
Shall I die like a dog? Thou shalt not let me die,
But my Khu that the teeth of the crocodiles sever
Shall be mighty in heaven for ever and ever!

Yea! but I am a Fool, a Flutterer[44]!

I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am a Liar and a Sorcerer[45].
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am so fickle that I scorn the Bridle[46].
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am unchaste, voluptuous and idle[47].
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am a Bully and a Tyrant crass[48],
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am as dull and as stubborn as an Ass,
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am untrusty, cruel and insane,
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am a Fool and frivolous and vain.
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am a Weakling and a Coward; I cringe,
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am a Catamite and Cunnilinge.
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am a Glutton, a besotted Wight;
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am a Satyr and a Sodomite.
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am as changeful and selfish as the Sea.
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am a Thing of vice and vanity.
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
 I am most violent and I vacillate,
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am a blind Man and emasculate.
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am a raging Fire of Wrath, no wiser!
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am a Blackguard, Spendthrift and a Miser.
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am obscure and devious and null.
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am ungenerous and base and dull.
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am not marked with the white Flame of Breath.
I am under the Shadow of the Wings!
I am a traitor! Die the traitor’s death!

He is slain by the Sword.

I am under the Shadow of the Wings[49]!

This last raises Candidate erect.

Invoking Spiral Dance.

Now let me pace the Path, bind on

The girdle of the Starry One!

Bar in Northwest

Asar! Who clutches at my throat[50]?

Who pins me down[51]? Who stabs my heart?[52]

In North. See Horus[53].

Soul mastering terror is Thy name!

Lord of the Gods! Dread Lord of Hell[54]!
I am come. I fear Thee not. Thy Flame
 Is mine to weave my maiden spell!
I know Thee, and I pass Thee by.
For more than Thou am I!

Bar in Southeast

Asar! Who clutches at my throat?

Who pins me down? Who stabs my heart[55]?

In South. See Isis.

Sorrow that eateth up the soul!

Dam of the Gods! The blue sky’s Queen.
This is Thy Name[56]. I come, control,
And pass! I know Thee, Lady of Teen
I know Thee, and I pass Thee by.
For more than Thou am I!

Bar in Northeast

Asar! κ.τ.λ. (rubric as before)

In East. See Thoth[57]. (Israfel from 19).

Silence.
Bar in Southwest.

Asar! κ.τ.λ. (rubric as before)

In West. See Nature. (C. contemplates self, in silence.)

I will not look uon Thee more,

For Fatal is thy Name. Begone!
False Phantom[58], Thou shalt pass before
The frowning forehead of the Sun[59].
I know Thee, and I pass thee by.
For more than Thou am I[60].
At Altar. Formulating Hexagram[61].
Now witness ye upon the Earth,
Spirit and Water, and Red Blood!
Witness above, bright Babe of Birth,
Spirit, and Father, that are God!

As Babe in Egg, being born[62].

For Silence duly is begot

And Darkness duly brought to bed.
The Shroud is figured in my Thought[63],
The Inmost Light is on my head[64].

Unbind. Sign of Enterer[65].

Attack! I eat up the strong Lions. I!

Fear is on Seb, on Them[66] that dwell therein,
Behold the radiant Vigour of the Lord!

Sign of Silence[67].

Defence! I close the mouth of Sebek[68], ply

My fear on Nile, Asar that held not in!
Behold my radiant peace, ye Things abhorred.
For see! The Gods have loosed mine hands:
Asar unfettered stands[69].
Hail, Asi, hail! Hoor-Apep cries[70].
Now I the Son of Man arise
And follow[71], dead where Asar lies!

Lie down in Sign of Hanged Man:

I gild my Left Foot with the Light[72].

I gild my Phallus with the Light.
I gild my Right Knee with the Light.
 I gild my Right Foot with the Light.
I gild my Left Knee with the Light.
I gild my Phallus with the Light.
I gild mine Elbow with the Light.
I gild my Navel with the Light.
I gild my Heart Wedge with the Light.
I gild my Black Throat with the Light.
I gild my Forehead with the Light.
I gild my Phallus with the Light.
The three-fold Star cross-crowned, I rise
Partaker of the Mysteries.

Rising in Sign Mulier[73].

Asar Un-nefer! I am Thine

Waiting Thy glory in the shrine,
Thy bride, thy virgin, ah my Lord!
Smite through the spirit with thy sword

Asar Un-nefer[74]! rise in me[75]

The chosen catamite of thee
Come! O come now! I wait, I wait
Patient-impatient, slave of Fate
Bought by thy glance. Come now, come now
Touch and inform this burning brow.
Asar Un-nefer! in the shrine
Make Thou me wholly Thine.

Remove Hoodwink[76].

I am Asar, worthy alone

To sit upon the Double Throne.
Attack is mine, and mine defence[77]:
And these are one[78]. Let us go hence!
For I am master of my Fate[79],
Wholly initiate.
 The Secret Word[80]:
L A Sh T A L
Me Ha Be He M
MUAUM
Me Tz Te Be Tz M
ABMN
L A Sh T A L

The words are spoken duly:

The deeds are duly done
My Soul is risen newly
To greet the risen Sun.

Bell accordingly.

One! Four! Five! Hail!

One! Four! Five! Ten[81]! All Hail!

Sign accordingly.

I give the Sign that rends the Veil[82].

The Sign that closes up the Veil.

M....M

THE SEALING OF THE PYRAMID[83]

Proceed as in the Building, unto the word. Suns.
The Magus with Wand. [.] In his Left Hand the Bell he taketh:

Hail! Asi! Hail, Hoor-Apep[84]! Let

The Silence speech beget[85]!
Two Strokes on Bell. Banishing Spiral Dance:

The Words against the Son of Night

(etc., to breaks forth from under.)[86]

He goes to the West, in the Centre of the Base of the Triangle of Θωθ ( ‫) מ‬,
Asi ( ‫) א‬, and Hoor ( ‫[) ש‬87] :

O Thou, the Apex of the Plane,

(etc., to Art One, above their moving might!)

He lays the Wand, etc., on the altar, uses the Scourge on his buttocks, cuts a
cross with the Dagger upon his Breast and tightens the Chain of the Bell
about his forehead, saying:

The Lustral Water! Smite thy flood (etc.)

Anointing the Wounds, say:

The Fire Informing! Let the Oil[88] (etc.)

The Invoking Spiral Dance:

So Life takes Fire from Death, and runs

Whirling amid the Suns.

Banishing Spiral Dance[89]:

Now let mine hands unloose the sweet

And shining girdle of Nuit!

The Adorations and the Word.

Sign of the Enterer.

Homage to Thee, Lord of the Word!

Sign of Silence.

Lord of the Silence, Homage to Thee!

Repeat both Signs.

Lord, we adore Thee, still and stirred,

Beyond Infinity.

The Secret Word.

M....M

Then, at the Altar:

Behold! the Perfect One hath said

These are my body’s Elements
Tried and found pure, a golden spoil[90]
Incense and Wine and Fire and Bread[91]
These I consume, true Sacraments[92]
For the Perfection of the Oil[93].

Act accordingly.

For I am clothed about with flesh

And I am the Eternal Spirit
I am the Lord that riseth fresh
From Death, whose Glory I inherit
Since I partake with Him. I am
The Manifestor of the Unseen
Without me all the Land of Khem
Is as if it had not been.

Proceed as in Building to End:

 For from the Silence of the Wand
Unto the Speaking of the Sword,
And back again to the Beyond,
This is the toil and the Reward.
This is the Path of Hua-Ho!
This is the Path of ΙΑΩ.

Bell 3-5-3.

Hail Asi! Hail, Thou Wanded Wheel!

Alpha and Delta kissed and came
For Five that feed the Flame[94].
Bell.
Hail, Hoor-Apep! Thou Sword of Steel!
Alpha and Delta and Epsilon
Met in the Shadow of the Pylon
And in Iota did proclaim
That tenfold core and crown of flame.
Hail, Hoor-Apep! Unspoken Name!
Bell.

Hail, Hoor! Hail, Asi! Hail, Tahuti! Hail

Asar Un-nefer! through the rended Veil.
I am Thyself, with all Thy Brilliance decked[95]

KHABS AM PEKHT[96].
CHAPTER TEN
 A LETTER TO ONE PROBATIONER

The Probationer advances in his authenticity as much as in his mistakes,

the Probationer is inclined to himself and to his way only, and in this self-
sufficiency, he finds further progress. He advances further until he finds
himself on the shore of the great ocean, stranded in the City of the Pyramids.
As he advances, he watches his sun-boat and all belonging to him washed
and lost in those waters, like in the aquarelle of Self. As millions of years
advance and disperse every atom of his being, dissolving him in the mass of a
monotonous empty ocean, everything remaining will be that progress, going
forwards, endlessly forwards, without a form, without a body or self, for no
reason nor cause. This quiet, impersonal progression is all that the A ∴ A ∴
is.
As the Probationer progresses further through his Grade, encountering
various Eastern and Western thoughts, theories and practices, he must be
aware of what is needed and what is not. Soon he will conceive that one of
the highest arts is to separate essential from irrelevant. Magick and
Mysticism are like the left and right sides of your body; you cannot have both
equally developed. One is always more active than the other, with more
control and awareness. At this place, the Aspirant will find a worthy attempt
to make a difference between the path of Magick and Mysticism. In general,
the definition of Magick is referred to as a change in nature that is in
accordance with Will. But no one says whose will. It seems that Mysticism is
a bit more flexible. The relation between Mysticism and Magick perhaps can
be properly compared as the relation between our imposed Fate outside
(without) and our chosen Will inside (within).
Let us focus on Magick; what we know about it today is mostly
misinterpreted as the system of Thelema. And, of course, the overwhelming
majority in our world identifies Magick solely with the work of Aleister
Crowley. It is certainly true that thanks to him we have a system that we
define as Magick, but it is important to bear in mind that Crowley himself
was the result of many influences and traditions which have left an
impression on him, as he left to us.
 Many branches of our tree of knowledge interweave, twist, support each
other, but often shave the sun to one another, from that childish need to grab
that light only for us. It is essential to realize that our entire system consists
of inseparable subgroups that all together contribute to the whole in specific
symbiosis. Our art should only be understood as a whole; it is completely
impossible to understand the system of numbers if we would favor the value
of one number more than the other, or if we expel any number from the
numeral system, whether it is a decimal, octal, binary, or any other. We are
firmly against any specialist doctrine; our path is in interweaving and
intercourse, not in exclusivity.
We look at Magick and Mysticism as two lanes of one street. Both lead
to the same goal. Illumination. Magick is based on the premise that the
individual Will within is the cause of change. Mysticism tells us that Will is
only a consequence of an external cause and that the focus on the outside
brings change that is reflecting in ourselves. You can climb into the house of
God, but you can also make your house divine if you settle the Lord inside. It
is one of the roughest divisions of our Art – the path of Mysticism and the
path of Magick. One should take note that the word Absolute does not imply
a direction as purely vector value.
Most Aspirants will usually start drawing the Tree of Life from above,
or from the first Sephira. Precisely in this is the perfect explanation of how
the Western mind is looking at reality. We already stated that there are two
lanes, or courses. One from below and one from above or one without and
one within, if you prefer it more. The Western mind used to watch things
from afar. Therefore, the method of the Aspirant of Magick is often a method
of stress and struggles, unlike the Mystic whose method is in surrender and
delivering. In other words, the Mystic would draw the Tree of Life by starting
from Malkuth, and not from Kether as the Magician would do boldly. These
two essential ways in our Art are called the Lighting Flash, also known as the
Flaming Sword and the Serpent of Wisdom or Rising the Snake. Qabalah, as
the basic polygon of Western hermetic thought, goes from top to bottom, it is
the path of the Spirit descending among the mundane world. The path of
Mysticism, on the other hand, is the way of climbing the mountain of
Abiegnus. Both ways define the same reality but constitute it from a different
point of view.
These are two ways of a single Illumination. Think about how the
Snake is wrapped around the Paths, while Lightning involves Sephirot. But
ten Sephiroth do not perfectly match with the seven Chakras. This is how we
adjust our view on the rise of the Snake, but too much effort in equalizing
these two ways can lead to trouble. Because 22 Paths are not best
implemented in work with Chakras; we have subtle energy channels, like
Nā ḍ , but this remark is far from similarities with the Paths on the Tree of
Life.
Aspirants often perceive Paths and Sephiroth as the concepts of static
and dynamic, however, experience tells us to reconsider what is really static,
and what is dynamic? Tiphareth as the Sun on the one side, and the “Sun” as
Atu XIX on the other, what is dynamic and what is static here? Both concepts
can be static and dynamic, yet it is always necessary to watch a broader
picture and observe things from another angle.
The biggest problem we have with Mysticism today is the fact that this
system is planted inside the eastern concept of life and acquired from the
earliest youth. In contrast, we Westerns do not have a balanced relationship
with the systems we follow, but we arbitrarily modify and adapt them during
our progress and quite late in life we begin with the striving to higher planes.
We change our reality when we are already grown up. The mystic, however,
has not even been able to grow, and his reality has already been changed.
This is the reason why the Magician needs a higher number of Paths
and Sephiroth. That is why we demand a decade system instead of a binary
one. For, not only do we seek one Truth, we are destroying others which are
already established in us. Paths enable us to make a more comfortable change
of our being; their characteristic is in gradualness. The change provoked by
Mysticism is abrupt and sudden. In a way, this is a picturesque comparison
with Sōtō and Rinzai Zen. Like slow and fast awakening. Like smooth and
dramatic. It is not enough to stress that both systems look at the same sky and
strive for the same aim. And as the force descends downwards, so our
western mind begs for more details, our Ruach starts to explain already
existing analogies, and when they are absent, it creates a new one. More and
more, faster and faster. Always more, and always faster.
Where is Thelema in all this? We have the path of Magick and the path
of Mysticism. We have correctly defined everything so far, but when it
comes to Thelema, it seems that our mind wiggle, as if it is from mercury
instead of gold. From all the noise we have made today, we cannot hear the
voice of Thelema. From here work becomes more difficult.
If we perceive Magick and Mysticism as the name and surname of
reality, Thelema would be its nickname. And as many of us officially are
known by name and surname, yet we will turn quicker in the street if
someone shouts our nickname. It is not written in any public document; there
is a year of your birth, various social security codes, places and names, and
yet most of people we are close to call us by our nickname which often has
no similarity with the name nor surname at all.
In royal Rāja Yoga, the idea of Thelema is also present but it is not
reserved for the beginning. Although Yama and Niyama in the old system are
introduced before Āsana, many Aspirants deal them during or after Āsana
and Prā ṇ āyāma. There are several reasons for this, and we will certainly
have an opportunity to discuss it later. After the practice in Āsana and
Prā ṇ āyāma, there is a training of our moral and ethics, and this is precisely
where Thelema can be found. Training of moral and ethics. Can they be
trained at all? Is not the way of Thelema in their release to rape patterns of
behavior within our soul with their furious intentions and to bounce like Pan's
goat along the congested highways of ordinariness? Thelema is a condition
for every good Magick, not the contrary; only after understanding this can
serious work begin and there are no words that can lead our students more to
accept this sacred principle.
If we now return to Magick and Mysticism, we can notice that both
paths have one excellent joint thing, and that is the idea of the Middle Way,
which our Eastern brothers call Sushumna. We have Ida and Pingala, we
have the Pillars of Severity and Mercy, and finally, we have the Middle Pillar
or Sushumna. Both Magick and Mysticism try to shorten their trajectory,
each in its own specific way. This appeals especially to the path of Magick
nowadays, when people do not have time for their individual work and are
trying to repay that through working in various groups. Remember not to fall
into this trap. Do not think that anything which is not yours could compensate
what should be yours.
No such group work can refund individual. If one Aspirant cannot find
time for himself, how does he expect that time spent with others will do
something for him? Young Aspirants and followers of the West path
immediately seek the method for astral projection, the Enochian magick and
afternoon recipes of sexual alchemy. Which is of course understandable. It is
upon us to cultivate and direct their desire into one real goal, which is far
enough to hold their attention but close enough to hold their motivation. And
that is the true significance of the Grades. There is no truth in them, just
encouragement for only one real step which needs to be done.
A further story of the Mysticism and the Rise of the Snake tells us that
it is wrapped around all the Paths, using them as a means of support, not the
Sephiroth. On the other hand, it is the Lighting Flash which illuminates
Sephiroth. Looking at the whole thing, we can conclude that Mysticism puts
the accent on the method, while Magick emphasizes achievement. Method
and Achievement, Path and Sephira. Therefore, as we perform mystical
practice, the essence should be put on the objective knowledge of what we
have done. Or at least what we tried We should neglect all visions and side
attainments as much as we can. In Buddhism, there is a saying “if you meet
the Buddha on the road, kill him.” In fact, this is not a saying but instruction.
The enemy of Mysticism is distraught by inner sensations. The greatest
danger in Magick is the opposite; we are deluded by higher spheres and what
we believe is above us. Being distraught by the Aim in Mysticism, and being
distraught by the Method in Magick. As the Aspirant advances from Malkuth
to Kether, his gaze is fixed constantly upwards. Often looking at heights, he
does not sometimes see what is obvious in front of him.
A suitable Aspirant does not equalize Mysticism with Yoga, as he does
not identify Magick with Thelema. Of course, this equation does not have to
be in the technical, but rather in a conceptual sense. Unlike Magick which is
more practical in nature, Thelema is a philosophical system that depends
solely on your personal progress. And most of all, on your personal
intelligence. You cannot learn or read about Thelema. Either you know it or
not. No practice nor exercise can give you an insight into Thelema. I often
like to say that Thelema is just one of the ways in which a dialogue between
you and your God is being made; even more, Thelema is exactly that
between.
We cannot know with certainty if Thelema is a cause or a consequence
of a change in human development. But from our point of view, Thelema is
always the cause of good Magick. Think of it, the relationship between
Magick and Thelema is like the value of a dollar. Magick is a dollar in your
wallet, Thelema is the value of that paper on a stock market. Today, with one
piece of paper, you can be a millionaire, tomorrow that paper may not be
worth a cent. Magick is an accomplishment, Thelema determines how valid
that accomplishment is. A lot of banknotes have no value if you find yourself
in a blizzard. All you can do is to burn them and to get some warmth.
Long ago, I found myself believing that I was a good magician. I
worked a lot; I read and experienced different and wonderful insights, but
without accurate recordings. Sometimes, not only I forgot when and what I
did, but I forgot the results of the work as well. This is the absence of
Thelema in practical Magick. I worked hard and devotedly, but without full
awareness, without the most important part – and that is fullness. Perfect
results, conclusions and divine insights are nothing compared to the
awareness of the whole process. Indeed, it is the only true segment of our
work – fullness. Keep the Diary, therefore, even if you are not an Aspirant of
Magick or Mysticism. It is a precious tool for your psychoanalysis, the key to
the door of your utmost reality.
Let us go further; there is something more to say about the Nā ḍ and the
Paths when we are already at the bridge between the East and the West. In
working with Nā ḍ , what is certain is that there are those subtle channels
which Easterners define as solar and lunar. It can be noticed that the Paths,
however, do not have such a diametric aspect of their basic idea. Of course,
the Aspirant can find many similarities between Nā ḍ and the Paths as he is
more concerned with this matter. Mostly, practitioners agree on the point that
we become aware of the Nā ḍ channels once the energy flows through them.
In other words, energy leads to awareness. With the Paths it is the contrary; it
can be said that exactly the awareness of the Path arouses energy afterward in
that area as its consequence. In both cases, it is clearly felt at the physical
level. Sometimes, some parts of our body become numb, sometimes starting
to shake to the extent that fear and discomfort arise, or even strong pain,
which all shows that the force has encountered a blockade.
There are only two ways in which this blockade breaks. The first one is
tougher and dramatic, which is to increase the flow of energy along its
natural route to break the blockade itself. But there is a risk, because this
blocked unconscious part of our being is now traveling through our spiritual
body as a thrombus, and it is only a matter of time when it will again appear,
in its much worse and more severe form. The second way to solve this
problem is to create a spiritual bypass at a place where the blockade
manifested. But there is a danger also. As we are raising energy on a daily
basis, there is a high probability of forgetting that we have left abridged part
behind us, and then after a while, as we return to old habits and old way of
life, a complete blockade of this new spiritual channel will happen. Instead of
an explosion as we had in the first case, an opposite effect will occur, that is,
suppression. It is marvelous how many experienced and elderly Aspirants
exhibit these two extremes. The first case, as an example of explosion, points
us to egoism, selfishness, stubbornness, and aggression. The second case tells
us about people who are too scattered, confused, naive and lacking self-
confidence. The similarity between Nā ḍ and Paths above all is in the
understanding of energy, not in the understanding of philosophy.
Furthermore, not all Nā ḍ and the Paths are equally understandable to our
Ego. As we progress towards deeper spheres, we get in touch with deeper
archetypes and sophisticated, subtle energies. No single Aspirant has the
same experience, and only one instrument is valid enough to show us
similarities and differences. You are carrying the most important of all the
instruments you will ever encounter; it already has a Tree of Life in it, one
Sushumna, both Ida and Pingala inside as well. That instrument is your Body.
Also, every sphere which has relation towards the light, and this applies
to each Sephira, has its night side or Qliphoth and at this place, it should be
convenient to mention phenomenon which is called the False Snake. Unlike
the two cases that we stated earlier and where Kundalini raised and
encountered the blockade, in this situation, there is no blockade because there
is no Ku ṇḍ alinī. It is often the case of those who have intellect dominion
over their life, finding themselves working for years without any success in
raising the energy and awareness merely because they overloaded their mind.
Think about how in many primitive societies we encounter ordinary people
who fall into a trance faster than most Adepts. Some of us will identify this
occurrence with eleventh Sephira. It is Daath and it is false, but only as a
Sephira. You can think that the Sephira of the Knowledge does not mean the
Knowledge itself.
Despite everything, it can be said that the path of the False Snake can
also be part of the Aspirant's enlightenment and an entirely valid choice for
the being; it always happens when Racio stands before Altar.
In the end, I would like to review the Probationer’s Oath briefly. The
most important thing is to fully understand the meaning of the Oath itself
because within the frames of these words precisely the whole work is
covered. If a Probationer could be aware of every word of his Oath, that
moment he would found himself as an Adept, therefore, it takes patience
here; this work is impossible to do in haste, and it takes time. And one year of
your Probation is precisely for that purpose.
Oath of the Probationer goes as follows:

I,______________________, being of sound mind and Body, on this ___ day of

______ (An _____ ☉ in ____° of ______) do hereby resolve: in the Presence of
______________________, a Neophyte of the A ∴ A ∴ To prosecute the Great
Work: which is, to obtain a scientific knowledge of the nature and powers of my own
being.
May the A ∴ A ∴ crown the work, lend me of its wisdom in the work, enable me to
understand the work!
Reverence, duty, sympathy, devotion, fidelity, trust do I bring to the A ∴ A ∴ , and
in one year from this date may I be admitted to the knowledge and conversation of the
A∴A∴!

Student expresses that he will acquire “scientific knowledge” which can

be obtained only by scientific observation of all phenomena and processes
within his own being. One should always think that our method is science as
our goal is religion. What is required is “to obtain a scientific knowledge of
the nature and powers of our own being.” It is precisely in this “own” that
this nature is hiding, while in “scientific knowledge” is all power. The Oath is
a brilliant puzzle, but more than anything, it is a signpost.
One of the most potent weapons in this is certainly his scientific
logging, which in the first place should have the form of the experimental
record. His whole Probation is an experiment, which should indicate whether
he is suitable or not, and nothing else. And as much as he does his best to
gain scientific knowledge about the nature and powers of his own being, he
will be so close to that very being. His suitability to the Order consists in that
he touches this being, to feel the form and the concept of “his own” and
according to that to determine its shape. Is there anything more powerful than
knowing the nature, is not the Conversation possible when the Knowledge
passes through the Aspirant?
Yes, our method is science, and our goal is religion. But intuition, that
divine whore, both mother and virgin, always changing us in a way just as
she wants. And always and constantly in the same way, we choose what has
already been accomplished. Because what you want and what you do not
want is one and the same thing. That is the dance of Pan. Regardless of the
scientific approach in his work, the Aspirant should always have an open
relation toward his intuition. This in no way means that he will listen to it.
Today, many Thelemites condemn customs of the old Æon; for
instance, one of the favorite sparing positions in Thelema is the issue of
marriage, and indeed, more and more people find nonsense to give marital
signature and obligation. If somebody wants to be with someone, he will be
no matter what, and if not – then tons of signatures and convincing will do no
good. The wedding ring reminds on attachment, but it cannot give something
if there is nothing. And if we attach to someone, is there a need for
reminding? A man does not carry his ID card with him just to know who he
is. Thelemites refuse to believe in a prince on a white horse, and they give in
to Love under the Will; when, where and with whom they Will.
But what is the function of signing the Probationer Oath, is it not the
paper as any other? How different is it from a marriage oath? Even more so,
in marriage we have a concrete person who is now and here beside us, while
with the A ∴ A ∴ Oath, we give ourselves to the Knowledge and
Conversation, something that we have no idea what it means, something that
we never know what it is, even through other people who again hear about it
from some third party. If we are so daring that we are questioning marriage,
will we equally dare to question our A ∴ A ∴ Oath? To question our own
thinking about the Knowledge and Conversation? Is the A ∴ A ∴ Oath a
consequence of our Grade or our Grade is a consequence of our Oath? How
much are we pure to accept that all of this may be the same model of thinking
and the same mind mechanism? A girl refuses to believe in a prince on a
white horse, why would you then believe in your Holy Guardian Angel? We
direct ourselves to achieve Him through a program that is more like a fairy
tale than anything else, are we ready to give up when we conclude that all
this is just one big empty story? Why should one give an Oath? To whom?
Toward what? Can we strive to the Angel freely, openly and unconditionally?
Does the fact that we do not have wings prevent us from striving towards
heavens?
These are the questions that we need to set before ourselves openly, and
put them into scientific consideration in the spirit of Thelema, just like the
issues of marriage, job, sex or money. In each occurrence, we see an Angel,
and in each Angel we see suspicion; here everything is possible, and nothing
is certain.
 Could you burn down your Oath? Is that thought disturbing you? Would
you see something more than dead matter in that ash? Would a relationship
with the Angel be the same? But an Aspirant of the A ∴ A ∴ should both
adore that flame and that ash. Both that Oath and that Angel, as well as
himself, are a part of that same kind; in this place, everything has infinite
value yet nothing is worth, just one thing in front of us and within us is
worthy of bringing judgment on all other values. He must be aware that all
molecules and atoms and their connections in the universe are part of one
same mechanism, and that every Oath is tied to the next one, as each
molecule is related to the other by the laws of living nature.
Each Oath is primarily a natural phenomenon or more precisely – a
natural occurrence, and giving it cannot be constrained by words, the shape
of lips, a scribble on a piece of paper, but by Will. Once proclaimed, is not
the Will expression of the whole universe? Who then gives an Oath when that
universe is that pen, and that paper where the Oath is written, and those lips
that pronounce it, and the one who witnesses it, and the one who swears it?
Similarly, as we have mentioned it earlier, the Aspirant's Oath is the magical
link of the highest kind, the Aspirant knows that every act in the universe is
only a different form of one decision:

...to prosecute the Great Work: which is, to attain to the knowledge and conversation
of the Holy Guardian Angel.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
 ANOTHER LETTER
TO THE PROBATIONER

“Dear Brother,
Correspondence between you and Victor made me write to you earlier
than I planned. For some time, I have been designing quality group work to
revive and engage our Kaaba. All this comes from my need and desire for
group work that I currently miss in my progress (at least that's the way I see
it), and from the fact that our last conversation about Kaaba ended with your
expectation for me to launch a further course of things.
What I've learned from your correspondence will not affect that; when I
have thought of what we can do, I will suggest it. Therefore, expect my letter
or invitation in the future. Of course, we are going to do this only if it suits
you, and each of your proposals is more than desirable.
I have only one complaint on the work of this Kaaba, which I am also a
member of (to exclude that I am the Chief, or I was). I wish I knew that
Kaaba was actively functioning and that more members had been received in
the meantime."

Greetings from Soror Ain ∴

Dearest Soror,
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.
I believe that group work is a trigger that will significantly accelerate
your “progress.” In any case, it is always real refreshment, and in the
beginning, it can happen that individual work also begins to gain the
significant achievement, or so to say, it is driven by the enthusiasm that is
created within the group. But this is often a definition of the very beginning,
and things then move in a completely different way. What I want to say is
that there will soon come a time of fatigue and weakening of the material; too
much enthusiasm seems to create too many problems, and I cannot count
overwhelming numbers of great groups that have broken up during the night
and where I participated as a young magician. This is all a rough observation,
and it does not have to mean anything more than the job has not been done
properly or that it has not been done by proper people. I am pleased that you
have vigorous ideas, which means that your personal work exhibits its nature
in the form of achievement. Only time will show what achievement it will be,
but bear in mind that creativity is a projection of Success, and this
observation does not have to be strictly focused on the spiritual, as any other
work. I am deliberately avoiding the term Magick, for personal reasons, but I
am sure that such a smart head like yours understands the difference. I can
say that I am not happy either because of me or the group, but because of
yourself; even though I became indifferent to many things, I always find
enthusiasm flows through my heart when I see Success in others, the one
same enthusiasm which made me reap the darnel around that Tree of
Eternity.
Let me be pragmatic. Yes indeed, I expect from you to initiate some
things. I have no function inside Kaaba (although Victor reminded me today
that I am still a member of the Council), the point is that I do not want to
start, and even less to extinguish things. For everything you ask me, I will
answer you most cordially, that is the least I can do even for some of my old
promises.
Thelema is a defined attitude of reality, and it does not have normality
within itself. I do not know why you are writing the way it simply should not
be: “we will do this only if it suits you, and each of your proposals is more
than desirable.” I hate such sentences. Your intent (not to speculate about a
will or Will) is as it is. Why are you even thinking about me? For you, I am
nothing more than a simple elemental. If I do not want to do this – I will not
do it. If by any chance you have no one to work with, do it by yourself. If ten
of us work on one attainment, how many attainments are there? This is the
essence of every group work. I do not know if you understand me, but it suits
me to write in this manner.
Also, “to exclude that I am its chief, or I was.“ Tell me what you are. If
you are not, then nothing. If you are, then maybe a bit of everything; you
must decide. I did not dismiss you, nor do I know anyone who did that. After
all, if you are the Chief of Kaaba 77, I do not see why you are directing your
opinion to the fact that it is even possible that you are not the Chief? Be
strong, thy man!
Kaaba is functioning actively; it is the Chief to itself because it is built
by the Egregor. Your attitude does not condition membership, I did some
personal things because the needs were personal. From your universe, it is
like there was nothing. It is very simple; all these happenings are just prickles
in the feet of the one who goes ahead. And you are the only one walking in
that direction. So do not remove the prickles. This will ease your pain but
will turn your sight from achievement. Go forward.
Let me know if you have any thoughts on this, I will be at home for a
while.

Love is the law, love under will.

Iakov ∴

Cara Soror,

I am doing intensively a specific type of work these days, so I will write

you a little bit of everything, as much as I have the time. As for the prophetic
dreams, I firmly believe that this is one of the “most dangerous“ parturition
of the Aspirant's change. Think about the real reasons why you call them
prophetic. Was it because of the prophetic Will you had before sleep (that is
to say, did you have the Will for prophecy), or is everything manifested as a
prophetic coincidence? Control, control, never say enough control. Dreams,
even those prophetic, belong mainly to the plain of astral influence. The
reasons for spontaneous prophecy can be various. Enthusiasm, individual
growth, but also openness to outer influences or illness. We cannot call
prophetic the perception of every event that is transcribed into this world.
Usually, it is a projection of widening the Aspirant's viewpoint; the one who
stands on the highest hill sees everything. However, is he a prophet?
This is an indication that something is changing inside you. Think about
whether this change is a method or achievement? Videlicet, is it merely the
result of your enthusiasm and excitement in work, or did it come as a “reward
of Ra-Hoor-Khuit?“ Anyway, it is part of your Knowledge and Conversation.
The only question is how you will know what is being talked to you.
As you are interested in astral projection, such substances are an ideal
trial stone for your work. Write dreams as much detail as you can; this is one
of the best methods that trigger the mechanism for projection.
The condition above all conditions is enthusiasm and inflammation of
the being. Your ritual of Pentagram also depends on this. Do not do just for
practice, or protection – God saves us from such nonsense. I know that you
devotedly intend to pass your one year, I am telling you more in principle
way. Being the Probationer is for one year. Probation is, however, for the
whole life.
Now when it comes to that; try a bit to loosen the form of the ritual.
You are rather cluttered and stereotyped in performing, therefore bring some
fire in it. When you say “on my right...“, first you lose your breath, and then
you take it too quick saying Mikael's name after this. You do not have to
torture yourself so much, just say “Mikael.“ Besides, to whom do you say
“on my right...“? You perform the ritual for yourself, so if you already
imagine Mikael on your right, there is no need to repeat this to yourself, we
are not that senile. The essence of the ritual is to free yourself so that it serves
just as a trigger. To do something like that, you need to relieve yourself from
all aggravating things or those which do not please your soul, or your body.
Unfortunately, it appears that the highest wisdom is to do it in the way a man
truly needs. Of all the weapons he has, he sharpens one which is already
perfect.
You are directed to do practice, not parrot repeating, and there is an
immense difference in this. Of course, most people know this in theory, but
when it comes to life, it looks like everything halts. Never try anything, never
perform, never practice, just do. Do not do by practicing, practice by doing.
When you get used to parroting, it will be very hard to change that. A very
similar thing is with playing an instrument or driving a motorcycle. Once a
particular mold in mind process has been established, it will be almost
impossible to change. Therefore, learn how to learn, learn how to improve
and ultimately, learn how to do.
The goal of the ritual of Pentagram is not to perform the ritual of
Pentagram. On the contrary, performance is the one which has the goal. And,
that is always and in every way the A ∴ A ∴ .
Perform the ritual nicely, gallantly and subtly – like on the top of your
fingers. It is like you do not want to wake up the dormant world around you.
Careful, but not fearsome. Look at the world as a sleeping beauty; your dance
breaks the curse, but if she wakes up too early – she will die from shock.
Also, learn to stop sometimes in ritual; see if everything is right, whether
something is done too little or maybe too much, stop just to enjoy the break.
Speak the name of God differently as if you tickle Him, then feel it
completely. Sometimes skip one side of the world just to tease it. The ritual is
a living being, so treat it like that. What you do to him, so will he do to you.
It is a secret above all secrets, and the time will come when you will see that
it is nothing else than the A ∴ A ∴ . We would say, one ritual – one kiss.
You wrote that: “group work should be designed, not randomly
performed or pushed by force,“ of course, but my dear, this is primarily
related to individual work. Think about how many times you have done your
practice by force, or you did it just in order so you can have something to fill
your log entry. Group work is mostly used to channel the individual and can
only harm if individual work is bad, or worse – if individual work is absent.
Group work is dessert. Whether you will stay hungry after it depends
exclusively on how much you ate before.
Also, you say, “after my excitement about it, a great disappointment
followed, which is related to my ongoing progress.” Disappointment? How is
disappointment related to your progress? Are you perhaps disappointed with
your progress? I do not expect an answer, neither does it interest me. My
dear, you do not have to fill the quantity of practice to be a good magician.
What number would that be? 5, 10, maybe 1000? Have you discovered that
all rituals in the world use the same letters of the alphabet, all rituals are
therefore the same? If you learn to perform one ritual, you will know all of
them. By doing more, it only shows your weakness to face that One. It is
easier to Your being to devise new challenges and adventures, only to fail to
achieve single Success. If you have not succeeded in one ritual, you will not
in any other. Do you think that the experience is obtained by a number? The
experience is obtained by Success, not by the Successes. And Success is only
One; Failure is all Other.
Also, about the Lesser Ritual of Hexagram. It does not clean from the
planetary influence. Let me briefly explain why. As I mentioned last time,
there are two types of hexagrams: lesser and greater one. The lesser refers to
elemental aspects, therefore it additionally invokes or banishes elemental
influences. The greater is directed to the planetary consciousness, therefore it
invokes or banishes the planetary forces.
Notice how lesser hexagrams look like. They are two-part, consisting of
a combination of two triangles. Now we come to the definition of elemental
and planetary. The elements are somewhere “here inside“, therefore it is a
microcosm. Planets, on the other hand, are somewhere “out there“, and it is a
macrocosm. “Here around” opposed to “there somewhere”. It is the shape of
5=6 formula. As planets, macrocosm is characterized by the tendency of
Unity, therefore their hexagram is single-stroked. Their nature is ARARITA.
The hexagram is a wonderful subject for meditation. Therefore, advance
further.

Iakov ∴
CHAPTER TWELVE
 BOOK OF THE HEART
GIRT WITH A SERPENT

What has to be told openly here is that the Book of the Heart Girt with a
Serpent can be everything that an Aspirant of the Golden Dawn would ever
need, and all the tasks and instructions of our Order are only pale echoes of
its verses. A book that at the same time consumes all the meaning of
Aspirant's search, from the Probationer to Adeptus Minor, indexed under the
number LXV, is the light to which all Aspirants return equally, and is
specifically assigned to the Grade of the Probationer. In fact, this book is not
written, for it is remembrance of a light that once appears to the merciful one,
it is like a pure LVX, which permuted makes the number of this book, like
permuted light, refracted light that portrays a new world with completely new
colors, equally false as real. For in the world of the Probationer, the lie is real,
and the truth is just an insinuation of a dream.
The connection between the Probationer and Adeptus Minor is so
remarkable that all the Grades between are nothing more than the stages of
the same dream. And as far as the Probationer is the one who fell asleep, so
much Adeptus Minor will be the same one who awakens. The process
between is what we will everlastingly talk about. The Aspirant must
understand that the Grades are artificial creations; they serve only as our
milestones in the endless stellar space of Nuit.
What is the Knowledge and Conversation for an Adept Minor, those are
Liber Pyramidos and Liber Cadaveris in our affairs for an Aspirant. Every
Knowledge is Pyramidos, as each Conversation is Cadaveris, their mutual
reflection always shows that this is the same thing. The Holy Guardian
Angel.
In order to know what he would talk about and talk about what he
knows, the Aspirant must first build his Pyramid, to lay his body and sink
into the darkness of the funeral chamber, passing slowly into the night. In this
complex sentence, the process of Pyramidos and Cadaveris is shown in a
simple way. Lastly, these two rituals are like two pillars that support the hall
where the Great Work is being performed, as Liber Samekh. All these
ceremonies merely represent ideas which are sustained by reason so that we
can experience them as such, but within themselves, they are exceedingly
simpler things.
Before we start a further study of the work before us, this is an excellent
moment to show a unique place in this whole act, especially dedicated to the
Probationer's Grade. Precisely in this beautiful and poetic way, the essence of
the A ∴ A ∴ is clearly explained. The words sing as follows:

1. Let not the failure and the pain turn aside the worshippers. The foundations of the
pyramid were hewn in the living rock ere sunset; did the king weep at dawn that
the crown of the pyramid was yet unquarried in the distant land?
2. There was also an humming-bird that spake unto the horned cerastes, and prayed
him for poison. And the great snake of Khem the Holy One, the royal Uræus
serpent, answered him and said:
3. I sailed over the sky of Nu in the car called Millions-of-Years, and I saw not any
creature upon Seb that was equal to me. The venom of my fang is the inheritance
of my father, and of my father's father; and how shall I give it unto thee? Live
thou and thy children as I and my fathers have lived, even unto an hundred
millions of generations, and it may be that the mercy of the Mighty Ones may
bestow upon thy children a drop of the poison of eld.
4. Then the humming-bird was afflicted in his spirit, and he flew unto the flowers,
and it was as if naught had been spoken between them. Yet in a little while a
serpent struck him that he died.
5. But an Ibis that meditated upon the bank of Nile the beautiful god listened and
heard. And he laid aside his Ibis ways, and became as a serpent, saying
Peradventure in an hundred millions of millions of generations of my children,
they shall attain to a drop of the poison of the fang of the Exalted One.
6. And behold! ere the moon waxed thrice he became an Uræus serpent, and the
poison of the fang was established in him and his seed even for ever and for ever.
[97]

How exalted is the way of Ibis. Here, in this place, is the heart of the
Oath which introduces to our Order. Although Ibis is the protagonist of our
saga, some other elements are included as well, in their equally important part
for understanding the entire process. We will briefly skip the beginning and
deal with the hummingbird and serpent. Their interaction is the opposite of
all what Ibis will do with his own will, which is so specific, so authentic and
inimitable. Right from the conversation and the relationship between
humming-bird and snake, Ibis will awaken his urge. The urge to lay aside his
customs. This inexplicable urge, an unbearable impetus to do everything
contrary to all laws and pressures of the outside world. From that moment on,
Ibis will never be the same again; change will start to work for him and his
magnificent name. And while the whole universe will remain the same in all
its movement, he will change while staying in place. For change is his second
name, this change is the Knowledge and Conversation of the A ∴ A ∴ . But
the change under Will, by His Will, not by the will of the serpent and the
world. Poison, this terrible divine poison appeared in him not because he was
asking. The poison is his reward; it is only a consequence of his decision to
go with his own way. Each of us is great Him, each has taken his Oath, and
each of us has made such a decision. And when we find ourselves in mud,
when dark clouds of dissatisfaction and depression overwhelm, let us
remember Ibis. For he left everything aside, his royal origins, all earthly
jewels, all the gifts, pleasantness and honor, and said: “Perhaps, somewhere
far away, poison might flow in my children, or the children of my children, I
will break the thread of earthly service and accept some others, some new
customs”. New customs of Ibis. This fantastic, insane decision to accept new
customs is the Probationer's Oath. He watched in his silence, made a decision
and said. You are silent, you are deciding, and you are saying, this sacred
trinity of god Toth is the essence of everyone who enters the A ∴ A ∴ . Ibis
and serpent are therefore Knowledge and Conversation; Ibis heard the serpent
and the humming-bird, and their dialogue forced him to find out and dare.
This is the true formula of the Rose and Cross, Ibis and Serpent are like
Abraxas and Horus and everything on this earth which is on the path of the
Sun and even the Sun itself is that. And that is the A ∴ A ∴ .
A more in-depth analysis of this story truly makes a great meditation:

Let not the failure and the pain turn aside the worshippers. The foundations of the
pyramid were hewn in the living rock ere sunset; did the king weep at dawn that the
crown of the pyramid was yet unquarried in the distant land?

Failure and pain, as projections of Binah. The foundations of the

pyramid are the G ∴ D ∴ , Paroketh, the living rock is Malkuth and the
Grade of the Probationer. The weeping king is the Man of the Earth, while the
pyramid and distant land, behind the great ocean, is clearly Binah. Also, the
Magister Templi in his highest form.

There was also an humming-bird that spake unto the horned cerastes, and prayed him
for poison. And the great snake of Khem the Holy One, the royal Uræus serpent,
answered him and said:

The poison is a desire in the Probationer, the snake is Kundalini. The

royal Uræus serpent is the Middle Pillar, but also horned planet Mercury and
the knowledge which the Probationer seeks. This snake is clearly shown in
Atu XXI “Universe.”

I sailed over the sky of Nu in the car called Millions-of-Years, and I saw not any
creature upon Seb that was equal to me.

Millions-of-Years, as projections of Binah. There is not a creature in the

night of Pan.

The venom of my fang is the inheritance of my father, and of my father's father; and
how shall I give it unto thee? Live thou and thy children as I and my fathers have
lived, even unto an hundred millions of generations, and it may be that the mercy of
the Mighty Ones may bestow upon thy children a drop of the poison of eld.

The father's father is an allusion to Chokmah, the poison is the gift of

his mouth, in fact, the projection of Logos, as it seems to the unenlightened
mind. There is nothing more toxic than the truth of the Magus Word.

Then the humming-bird was afflicted in his spirit, and he flew unto the flowers, and it
was as if naught had been spoken between them. Yet in a little while a serpent struck
him that he died.
Binah and Malkuth, as the influence of time on the earthly body. The
cycle of reincarnations.

But an Ibis that meditated upon the bank of Nile the beautiful god listened and heard.
And he laid aside his Ibis ways, and became as a serpent, saying Peradventure in an
hundred millions of millions of generations of my children, they shall attain to a drop
of the poison of the fang of the Exalted One.
The Ibis is a Probationer, but also a Magister Templi. The Exalted One
is Kether. Ibis listened and heard; the attributes of the hearing as the fifth
element, who heard the inner call towards the Angel.

And behold! ere the moon waxed thrice he became an Uræus serpent, and the poison
of the fang was established in him and his seed even for ever and for ever.

Kundalini which wraps around Muladhara three and a half times.

One of the most important things that the Aspirant of the Order must
feel at the very beginning is the feeling by itself; it is the specific morality
within our Order, which is so far from morality in the usual sense of the
word. This morality is a call which the Aspirant always feels within himself.
This is the only real work he has; everything else is more or less valuable
exercises only serving to sharpen those devices that he may use at the
moment of the Great Work. But nothing will bring him closer to that than the
call he constantly feels, continuously, in the form of unbearable pressure that
pushes him forward. That pressure, this wondrous breeze that always rides
his bark towards the sun is the A ∴ A ∴ .
Concerning the concrete work, the Probationer is instructed to learn one
chapter by heart. This requires some discussion. The Book of the Heart
consists of five chapters, each assigned to one element. Unfortunately, this
instruction too often acts like an intoxicating agent of the worst kind and
Aspirants, choosing and dedicating themselves to one chapter, neglect all
other. This task is nothing more than pointing the Aspirant to determine what
he likes at the very beginning and getting him accustomed to the A ∴ A ∴
most important principle, which is to choose what he truly desires. The
selected chapter shows the affinity and character of his unconscious nature,
thus referring him to his own Angel.
Learning by heart is a mind game that poses constant pressure until
saturation, boredom and fear rise. Fear not to fail, not to make a mistake, not
to stutter, not to miss a verse. It is upon his Superior to decide how he will
evaluate this part of the test, but the real crown of attainment is reflected in
choosing of what is His will, and not in the perfect automatic repetition of
something that is drawn out of coincidence and haste. The whole book with
five chapters is everything that the Aspirant in Golden Dawn will ever need,
and the full understanding of this book would point to the attainment of the
highest Grades.
Yes, the Probationer is required to learn one chapter by heart, but there
is something of at least the same importance. Besides that, the Aspirant
chooses a chapter he likes, and the likeness is a younger brother of Will, he
will also notice which chapter he dislikes and from which he diverges.
Sometimes this is a more direct notice about our nature than things we want.
After all, what you want and what you do not want are one and the same
thing.
 COMMENT ON LIBER CORDIS
CINCTI SERPENTE
SVB FIGVRA
ADNI
Frater Alion ∴
Frater Aureus ∴

CHAPTER I
1. I am the Heart; and the Snake is entwined
About the invisible core of the mind.
Rise, O my snake! It is now is the hour
Of the hooded and holy ineffable flower.
Rise, O my snake, into brilliance of bloom
On the corpse of Osiris afloat in the tomb!
O heart of my mother, my sister, mine own,
Thou art given to Nile, to the terror Typhon!
Ah me! but the glory of ravening storm
Enswathes thee and wraps thee in frenzy of form.
Be still, O my soul! that the spell may dissolve
As the wands are upraised, and the aons revolve.
Behold! in my beauty how joyous Thou art,
O Snake that caresses the crown of mine heart!
Behold! we are one, and the tempest of years
Goes down to the dusk, and the Beetle appears.
O Beetle! the drone of Thy dolorous note
Be ever the trance of this tremulous throat!
I await the awaking! The summons on high
From the Lord Adonai, from the Lord Adonai!
Poetic Introitus for the Great Work. But a tremulous throat is also Daath. It trembles
from the vibration of Magus' word of Æon, who brings this Truth to the lower Sephiroth,
from Chesed to Malkuth.
The Heart is Tiphareth; the snake is Teth (Lion-Snake); the mind is Ruah; calling the
Snake to rise – rising Kundalini; the corpse of the Osiris floating in the tomb is
Chokmah; the mother is Binah (Heh); sister is Malkuth (Heh); your own heart is
 Tiphareth (Vau); the Nile is the infinite space of Abyss; Typhon is the destroyer of Ego;
Ah me – the Ego is coming to an end; forms are “madness“ of unreality and instability; it
stills the soul, soothes thoughts; uprising the wand is the Power of the Phallus of Spirit;
revolving of the æons is the transition from restriction to dedication towards Divine
Spirit; Behold – opens the third eye; in my beauty is Tiphareth, the crown of mine heart is
Kether-Tiphareth, which is conquered by the influence of the Snake, 32 paths of the Tree
of Life; he proclaims: we are one – the dusk is the west, the death of the Ego, the end of
separation from the Spirit; beetle is Kephra, K-P-RA which is Kteis united with Phallos
radiating the Sun's shine. The drone of Thy dolorous note is titration of Binah's
Understanding; he awaits the awakening – explains that the soul is in the “lower” spheres
inside a dream, inexhaustible to the reality of the Spirit; explains that there is a duality,
that is, the separation of the Soul from the Lord Adonai whose “call“ awaits – for the
sake of unification. This first verse summarises the whole meaning of Liber LXV, in
which the Lover celebrates the Lord.

2. Adonai spake unto V.V.V.V.V., saying: There must ever be division in the
word.
Logos is “only” on the level of Chokmah. During his work, the Aspirant often receives
the Words – but the true meaning of them he receives subsequently, and “after all.”
The relationship between God and Magus – the Lover of Thelema; Adonai spake, starting
the Vibrations, and V.V.V.V.V.V. listens to by the organ of the Spirit. These very words
are a reflection of duality because they represent a vibratory view of other objects that the
subject understands as “outside” of oneself.
ADONAI is 65 – SH – Pillar of Sagittarius and Star Aquarius.
V.V.V.V.V. is 5x6 = 30 – Lamed – Libra – Maat – Truth.

3. For the colours are many, but the light is one.

LVX is One; everything else is Other. True nature is one which is only possible and
impossible. The Aspirant does not have to give to this an epithet of infinite and
unattainable, let him think of this as a limited category. Because Infinite is the only one,
finite things are infinitely many. Complete manifestation of the Rose+Cross.
The multitude stems from the One; colors are a manifestation of the LVX; Everything is
connected in the One, because the colors, i.e., the multitude are not “separated” from the
One, but the One manifests itself as a multitude.

4. Therefore thou writest that which is of mother of emerald, and of lapis-

lazuli, and of turquoise, and of alexandrite.
Mother – Understanding; Four elements, like the noble stones of the Earth in which the
ultimate manifestation of “colors” originated from One Light.
This is the specific impact of Binah on Malkuth.

5. Another writeth the words of topaz, and of deep amethyst, and of gray
sapphire, and of deep sapphire with a tinge as of blood.
In the Kingdom of duality and the multitude, the four elements have many variations of
appearance.
6. Therefore do ye fret yourselves because of this.
Duality and limitation bring discomposure; the soul is not calm in Ruach which is the
mind of the crowd.

7. Be not contented with the image.

Shape, an image is not a real nature of the Spirit; the image is the representation of the
face of God who is proclaimed to the Mage – Lover (those who separated from the Spirit,
the Soul which aspires to the Union).

8. I who am the Image of an Image say this.

Adonai is the Spiritual Reality; he is the essence which is covered or dressed by an
image, or a mask.
He speaks – conveys the Wisdom to the Sphere of Understanding.

9. Debate not of the image, saying Beyond! Beyond! One mounteth unto the
Crown by the moon and by the Sun, and by the arrow, and by the
Foundation, and by the dark home of the stars from the black earth.
The central channel of Sushumna; direct method. Three Grades of the Order of
Thelemites: the Man of Earth, the Lover and the Hermit. The Path of the Arrow or “Art,”
but is not only limited to the letter Samekh, as projected by anyone below the Magister
Templi.
In “otherworld,“ above the Abyss, images are meaningless because consciousness
conceives the Spirit; Vision is the instruction of the Soul, and in this way is an inspiration
to a lower self.
Describes the Middle Pillar of the Tree of Life – which is an indication of the powerful
method that leads to Illumination.

10. Not otherwise may ye reach unto the Smooth Point.

Proper movement is straightforward and always directed towards the center. Smooth
point is the axis of Samsara. Moving towards it is the path of non-action; the center
moves fastest, with the smallest consumption of force. Speaking about Samsara is
speaking about the Wheel of Samsara. It means acting by the Wheel of Samsara. It means
turning around the Wheel of Samsara. But besides everything, you are not on it, nor do
you turn or spin, yet again you act. Understanding Samsara necessarily implies neither
exit nor non-exit from the Wheel. The whole wisdom is in aligning your rotation with the
rotation of the axis, not in spending the effort for turning the Wheel. You have to
understand that the Nature of the Wheel is to rotate by itself, so your effort is indeed
redundant. Synchronize yourself with the rotation of the axis. By doing so, you will see
that the whole Reality turns, not the Wheel. The Wheel is proportionally opposite to this
conclusion, therefore its nature is static. This is a paradox itself, as a term and as an
experience. Do not turn the Wheel for anything in the world, you should not touch it in
any circumstances; therefore the key of initiation is in harmony of one movement.
Movement of the Wheel and movement of yourself, which is still One thing. Movement
of the Wheel.

“The Great Wheel of Samsara.

The Wheel of the Law [Dhamma].
The Wheel of the Taro.
 The Wheel of the Heavens.
The Wheel of Life.
All these Wheels be one; yet of all these the Wheel of the TARO alone avails thee
consciously.
Meditate long and broad and deep, O man, upon this Wheel, revolving it in thy mind
Be this thy task, to see how each card springs necessarily from each other card, even in
due order from The Fool unto The Ten of Coins.
Then, when thou know'st the Wheel of Destiny complete, mayst thou perceive THAT Will
which moved it first. [There is no first or last.]
And lo! thou art past through the Abyss.”
[Book of the Lies, Aleister Crowley]

“All things are empty:

Nothing is born, nothing dies,
nothing is pure, nothing is stained,
nothing increases and nothing decreases.
Therefore Sariputra, in emptiness,
there is no body, no feeling, no thought, no will, no consciousness.
There are no eyes, no ears, no nose, no tongue, no body, no mind.
There is no seeing, no hearing, no smelling, no tasting, no touching, no imagining.
There is nothing seen, nor heard, nor smelled, nor tasted, nor touched, nor imagined.
There is no ignorance, and no end to ignorance.
There is no old age and death, and no end to old age and death.
There is no suffering, no cause of suffering,
no end to suffering, no path to follow.
There is no attainment of wisdom, and no wisdom to attain.”
[Prajnaparamita Hridaya Sutra]

It confirms that the balance of the Middle Pillar represents the essence of the Method –
not otherwise may ye reach – this Work, i.e. the alignment of consciousness with the
energies of the Middle Pillar leads to the attainment or “rising“ to the Smooth Point,
which is the Kether in the Tree of Life.

11. Nor is it fitting for the cobbler to prate of the Royal matter. O cobbler!
mend me this shoe, that I may walk. O king! if I be thy son, let us speak of the
Embassy to the King thy Brother.
The things and objects of Malkuth belong to him, manifested in that Kingdom with the
meaning and will of the Creator; Spiritual Knowledge belongs to the Initiates; Wisdom is
from Chokmah – and the Son is Tiphareth. Planes or levels should not “interfere”
because everything is in the Order according to the great Harmony of cosmic principles.

12. Then was there silence. Speech had done with us awhile. There is a light
so strenuous that it is not perceived as light.
Light is but an expression. Every observation is the birth of duality. Light is a poetic
allegory, the projection of direct experience of Jñāna; Attainment is defined by its own
virtue, rather than by a Method. From there is the collapse of expected, out of that there is
“nothing” what is left to consider beforehand and what would be thought after.
Zodiac Signs or periphery of a manifested Universe which is shown to us as a starry sky
sprinkled with the darkness of space is the pre-form behind which is Nothing – the
mysterious NOX. There is no word underneath and above the sky – the silence governs;
 the manifestation of thoughts, i.e., words and vibrations do not exist in AIN; the
aforementioned light is the colorless NOX.

13. Wolf’s bane is not so sharp as steel; yet it pierceth the body more subtly.
Teeth – Shin, Spirit of Æon. There are suitable ways to achieve certain “desired” results
or goals; force is not crucial.

14. Even as evil kisses corrupt the blood, so do my words devour the spirit of
man.
DM – 44, blood; evil kisses are the worship of the multitude, which is, however,
consumed by the life force, the blood of the One; but the words of Wisdom from Adonai
overcome the limitations and disturbance of the human Soul.

15. I breathe, and there is infinite dis-ease in the spirit.

He breathes Pra-Nu; there is a movement of energy and consciousness in the visible
Universe.
The consciousness itself that resides within the Universe is the consequence of
movement, and it is just the illusion and side effect of motion of Prana.

16. As an acid eats into steel, as a cancer that utterly corrupts the body; so
am I unto the spirit of man.
Everything which is rough has an assigned method of initiating and implementing a
change, i.e., Magick for the purpose of awakening in the Spirit. VITRIOL eats the steel
(which is the heaviest chemical element that can be created inside the Star – Sun);
Cancer – 418 burns the body, i.e., Ego carrier; Adonai pervades the human Spirit.

17. I shall not rest until I have dissolved it all.

Only the irreversible Path of Initiation leads to the achievements of the Highest
Illumination. Union of Adonai and the Mage – the Lover.

18. So also the light that is absorbed. One absorbs little, and is called white
and glistening; one absorbs all and is called black.
Divided for love’s sake, for the chance of union. This is the true definition of Method and
Attainment by Yoga.
The Difference between Binah's Understanding and Ruach's Knowledge/intelligence.
Binah is the emptiness which absorbs the light; one who absorbs a little gives certain
reflections of light in his “existence.“

19. Therefore, O my darling, art thou black.

He is the Master of the Temple – in Understanding of Binah is the essence of
“understanding” the Light of Adonai and the soul of the Mage – Lover. My darling
emphasizes that the relation between “them” is Love by nature.

20. O my beautiful, I have likened thee to a jet Nubian slave, a boy of

melancholy eyes.
My beautiful – Tiphareth; Nubian slave – servant of NU; melancholy eyes – Binah.

21. O the filthy one! the dog! they cry against thee. Because thou art my
beloved.
Black Lodge is greater than the Aspirant can perceive. Everything that is not connected
with True Nature, everything that has been separated from the indivisible essence is
“Black“. But all this is a projection and part of Adonai's seduction, as a form of the
highest distraction and postponing the climax. We praise every dishonesty and proclaim
every Aspirant to be Black Magician until he awakens the perception of his True Nature.
Every act that aims at discovering that is as black as any other unless it is accompanied
by pure Success. But even then, as success is attained afterward, it does not make an act
for Success justified. No single act deviates more the Aspirant from the Self from his
attempt to reach the Self. A free man does not strive for what he already has, only the
prisoner yearns for freedom. Here lies the pedagogical instruction for the new
generations, which is to abolish the possibility and thought for Failure.
The profane, the filthy one, do not understand the initiate and consider him a dog.
He is a dog – Sirius/Star; Adonai affirms that there is a relationship of love among
“them.”

22. Happy are they that praise thee; for they see thee with Mine eyes.
There is an absolute magnificence in the words and proclamation of Adonai and the
writings of his Lover V.V.V.V.V.; spiritual people recognize this as the blessing of the
heavens – which is worth accepting as Æon's Gnosis and guidance on personal
attainment. Those who praise V.V.V.V.V.V. are inspired by God.

23. Not aloud shall they praise thee; but in the night watch one shall steal
close, and grip thee with the secret grip; another shall privily cast a crown of
violets over thee; a third shall greatly dare, and press mad lips to thine.
Three ways of praising; the Man of the Earth (secret grip of the material hand, during the
night watch, or wakefulness during the Night of the Soul), the Lover (worshiping the
Beauty of the Spirit – the kiss of mad lips of the Lover) and the Hermit (crown of
violets).

24. Yea! the night shall cover all, the night shall cover all.
The essence is not in secrecy, for it is only a projection of silence. However, silence is
not deafness. The one who goes perfectly smoothly gives the impression of hiding. Stress
is not on the Method but the Goal. A smooth going cannot be achieved by a proper
movement, but by an unburdened and impersonal tendency.
NOX is above “everything” (AL/PAN). Above manifestation of the Tree of Life is the
night – NUIT.

25. Thou wast long seeking Me; thou didst run forward so fast that I was
unable to come up with thee. O thou darling fool! what bitterness thou didst
crown thy days withal.
 It is a great desire of the Soul to meet God – and whose passion and tie to love for God
must be renounced.
He is a Fool – 111 – Aleph. The bitterness of his days is the sorrow of mundane life.

26. Now I am with thee; I will never leave thy being.

Adonai never leaves the Soul of a man. The impression of the knowledge and
announcement of Adonai can never be forgotten.
This should be understood as an infinitive. Everything is a constant stimulus of the
cosmic orgasm. There is no way in which True Nature cannot be manifested; here lies the
danger of justifying by Thelema. This doctrine is nothing but Achievement, the one who
uses it as Method is the worst of all animal spirits. Every event should be considered only
as a specific relationship of Adonai with our soul, every act as the exclusive dialogue
between “us” and “our” God.

27. For I am the soft sinuous one entwined about thee, heart of gold!
Adonai is a serpent; V.V.V.V.V. is a Golden Heart of Tiphareth.

28. My head is jewelled with twelve stars; My body is white as milk of the
stars; it is bright with the blue of the abyss of stars invisible.
Twelve stars – HUA; star of Aquarius; This is one of Nuit's description; Adonai is “her”
divine reflection that “communicates“ with the Soul of man.

29. I have found that which could not be found; I have found a vessel of
quicksilver.
The only constant is the constant of Change. However, the Aspirant should in no way
identify nor comprehend this change as an outcome of time. Time is a projection of
Change, it is an echo of the Insight's blast, like lightning of LVX before the thunder of
Ego, which only subsequently fills all Elemental planes under the excuse of Ruach.
What is impossible to find is nonexistent – Nothing/AIN. The vessel of quicksilver is the
Holy Grail of Understanding which is a “reflection“ of Darkness of Nothingness.

30. Thou shalt instruct thy servant in his ways, thou shalt speak often with
him.
The servant is the human being and the body that is the “carrier“ of the incarnated Spirit.
Knowledge must be transferred to “lower“ levels in order to be integrated with all aspects
and contents of the existing world. The wisdom of Æon must be transmitted to the
Kingdom of men.

31. (The scribe looketh upwards and crieth) Amen! Thou hast spoken it, Lord
God!
Looking upward to the God AMEN. Acceptance of the mission and the task of
transferring the Gnosis. He confirms to God that he Understand him.
Thou hast spoken it, Lord God – a specific relationship between Tiphareth and Kether at
this place. However, more likely to be a relationship between Chokhmah (the scribe),
Tiphareth (thou hast) and Kether (Lord God).
32. Further Adonai spake unto V.V.V.V.V. and said:
Still, there is transmission between the “two.“

33. Let us take our delight in the multitude of men! Let us shape unto
ourselves a boat of mother-of-pearl from them, that we may ride upon the
river of Amrit!
There is a new law that introduces people to the Joy of existence and to the multitude
itself. Joy is consumption of the pleasures of life – the boat of mother-of-pearl, by which
the body and soul feed the Lust of the Snake.

34. Thou seest yon petal of amaranth, blown by the wind from the low sweet
brows of Hathor?
Open the Eye and watch. Wind – air; low sweet brows – between them is Ajna; Hathor is
the throne of the Spirit of Solar Lord Horus – Adonai.

35. (The Magister saw it and rejoiced in the beauty of it.) Listen!
А.G.L.A. – 35.
The Magister rejoiced – he does not perceive duality of relations with Adonai – therefore,
at present, in this experience, he is not an Adept but a Magister.
Listen – ear as the organ, instrument of Spirit.

36. (From a certain world came an infinite wail.) That falling petal seemed to
the little ones a wave to engulph their continent.
There is a relationship of work, action and reaction, perception and the one who
perceives, as well as experiences, reflections and impressions of life.

37. So they will reproach thy servant, saying: Who hath set thee to save us?
Remark to the Salvation. The solution is in the practical realization of Self. Making the
Salvation as a standard.
The Adept is the deputy of his inner Magister; he is the Savior/Soter to people – but they,
as multitude who dwell in ignorance of the material world, do not understand nor accept
him.
Indeed, in others, one can find instructions and inspiration, but the Savior is only there
for himself, no other mediator exists between him and God Adonai.

38. He will be sore distressed.

Magister resides sored in Understanding, in Binah.

39. All they understand not that thou and I are fashioning a boat of mother-
of-pearl. We will sail down the river of Amrit even to the yew-groves of
Yama, where we may rejoice exceedingly.
 People who live in limitation and blindness cannot understand the mystery of the Spirit –
until they hear the call of God.
The two of them – God and the Adept, sail together by the river of Life, all the way to the
place of initiation where the final union will come.

40. The joy of men shall be our silver gleam, their woe our blue gleam— all
in the mother-of-pearl.
The splendor of Water and the Luna is a reflection of the beauty of the Golden Sun.

41. (The scribe was wroth thereat. He spake: O Adonai and my master, I
have borne the inkhorn and the pen without pay, in order that I might search
this river of Amrit, and sail thereon as one of ye. This I demand for my fee,
that I partake of the echo of your kisses.)
The ecstasy of the union between the Soul of a Man and Divine Spirit will touch the body
of the scribe – because even in his most material work, a Man sought the highest
achievement.

42. (And immediately it was granted unto him.)

There is a specific result, experience, material “feeling“ of the Highest Illumination.
But the real result of Enlightenment is always immediately granted; the Knowledge and
Conversation possess neither preparation nor method, preparation is only used by Ego to
bestow itself the role of Iphigenia, in order for the last time to ritually wash before
kneeling at the altar of Paroketh.

43. (Nay; but not therewith was he content. By an infinite abasement unto
shame did he strive. Then a voice:)
Man in his intelligent considerations cannot determine the “measure“ of achievement.

44. Thou strivest ever; even in thy yielding thou strivest to yield— and lo!
thou yieldest not.
To know what is not, you have to know what it is. A paradox of an endless number of
things to know. The exhaustion of an infinite number of possible and impossible
possibilities for reaching what is Not. But remember that the ultimate concept extends
beyond the infinite.
Infinite is, however only one, finite things are infinitely many.
Yet, God is the one who directs, guides and protects the Soul, and man is his
manifestation. Man, as a Lover, continually strives for the teaching of that love – while
the “ultimate“ goal is not only the unification of polarity but being in Oneness, not
noticing apartness and not distinguishing God and Man.

45. Go thou unto the outermost places and subdue all things.
Expansion of consciousness to endlessness; stilling of all desires.
He must become the Lord of all things, which will be under the Will of the Mage; he
must know all things so that consciousness can be dissolved in the light of Nothing.
46. Subdue thy fear and thy disgust. Then— yield!
The fear of mystery, which neither the soul nor the spirit can conceive; disgust is
antagonism against the reflection that is seen in the Abyss of Nothingness. Yielding the
Ego leads to the ultimate union. It leads to Peace.

47. There was a maiden that strayed among the corn, and sighed; then grew
a new birth, a narcissus, and therein she forgot her sighing and her
loneliness.
This is a different view of Adept and his relationship with Adonai. A maiden is Nephesh,
and a narcissus is the Sun.
Also, the mystery of Persephone, sighing and core are the reflections of Binah and
Tiphareth.
48. Even instantly rode Hades heavily upon her, and ravished her away.
HAD – 10 – attachment to the darkness of matter, at the same time, indicates that the key
of initiation is the Point itself, which is the Crown of the Light of Unity – Hadit.

49. (Then the scribe knew the narcissus in his heart; but because it came not
to his lips, therefore was he shamed and spake no more.)
Narcissus is the egoism of Tiphareth, which in its imperfection (unachieved Oneness
with God) is the center that Ruach worships.

50. Adonai spake yet again with V.V.V.V.V. and said: The earth is ripe for
vintage; let us eat of her grapes, and be drunken thereon.
The whole chapter applies to the element of Earth.
Pleasure in material delights refreshes, nourishes and strengthens the relationship
between Adeptus and Adonai. This teaching is opposite to asceticism and other forms of
restraint, restriction and “self-control.“

51. And V.V.V.V.V. answered and said: O my lord, my dove, my excellent

one, how shall this word seem unto the children of men?
Trinity: Lord – Dove – Excellent one. The Man of the Earth has Lord as Master; The
Lover conceives God as Excellent one; Dove is the messenger of the Spirit.
The Dove = IVNH (John) – 71 (Lam).

52. And He answered him: Not as thou canst see. It is certain that every letter
of this cipher hath some value; but who shall determine the value? For it
varieth ever, according to the subtlety of Him that made it.
Expansion of awareness and knowledge allows observing the scheme in every particular
element. However, both the observation and creation of the scheme, from the ultimate
point, are identical. Therefore, the perception of reality is also the creation of a new one.
Anyone who steps on the path of Spirit can conceive this Gnosis differently – dogmatism
is rejected as a restriction; V.V.V.V.V. sees all this in his own way, and other initiates,
adepts, scholars, and masters perceive these words inherent to their “capacity“ for
 Understanding.
53. And He answered Him: Have I not the key thereof? I am clothed with the
body of flesh; I am one with the Eternal and Omnipotent God.
The key is in the letter “Z“ – it connects Binah and Tiphareth. In that is an alchemical
wedding between the body of flesh with an Eternal and Omnipotent God.

54. Then said Adonai: Thou hast the Head of the Hawk, and thy Phallus is
the Phallus of Asar. Thou knowest the white, and thou knowest the black, and
thou knowest that these are one. But why seekest thou the knowledge of their
equivalence?
One of the conditions for “creating“ the Abyss. Consistency is a dance on the razor.
Head of the Hawk – HOOR; Phallus of Asar – Osiris/Father of Tetragrammaton; he
understands the meaning of polarity – and therefore seeks Gnosis and experience of
Union.

55. And he said: That my Work may be right.

The Work is “proper“ only when the multitude (in which the Man of the Earth resides)
brings the perception of duality (the Lover of God) which then blends and becomes the
One – Adonai.

56. And Adonai said: The strong brown reaper swept his swathe and
rejoiced. The wise man counted his muscles, and pondered, and understood
not, and was sad. Reap thou, and rejoice!
Angel's objection on Adept's desire to understand illusion and to act on it.
May everyone does his Will, may everybody manifest its nature – may all reap what they
sow. A wise man does not work, “he“ does not understand the work in the same way as
Adept do – therefore he is sad and dwells in Understanding. Still, the work must be
carried out as long as Man, as the carrier of Magister's Spirit, is incarnated in the body –
carrier of the soul. The Law of Æon gives the joy of work and not the sorrow of mere
Knowledge.

57. Then was the Adept glad, and lifted his arm. Lo! an earthquake, and
plague, and terror on the earth! A casting down of them that sate in high
places; a famine upon the multitude!
The arm – Yod – satisfied Hermit. The multitude of the manifested Kingdom is always
brought into a state of change through the transformation of the Earth's element.

58. And the grape fell ripe and rich into his mouth.
The experience of change in life is yet one more of the possible experiences of the Soul.

59. Stained is the purple of thy mouth, O brilliant one, with the white glory of
the lips of Adonai.
Every act of Adept is a kiss of his Angel – every single event is the relationship of God
 with his Soul. But that purple is His purple, so sweet purple.
Man and God exist in mutual Love. There is a permanent bond, connection, relationship
between “two of them“.

60. The foam of the grape is like the storm upon the sea; the ships tremble
and shudder; the shipmaster is afraid.
Trinity: every part of the Soul is touched by the impressions of interplay between man
and God; the pleasure of Spirit is a storm upon the sea of the “unconscious,” aware
concepts of alertness – the ships are trembling; the ego-center, as the governor of a man,
is afraid – “he“ is not the real Shipmaster – Magister, who governs and enjoys life as an
Adept.
Ships tremble and shudder, Ruach before the clashes of the Abyss, the Endless Ocean.
Fear as a projection of Choronzon. But Shipmaster is frightened; he sails along the
Ocean in accordance with nature, fear is just the projection of the Adeptus Major, in
contrast to the calm and blue waters of Chesed. This fear is not Ego's fear, Adept is
liberated, yet this is a description of nature as everyone sees it below, that is, from
Malkuth to Geburah.

61. That is thy drunkenness, O holy one, and the winds whirl away the soul of
the scribe into the happy haven.
Further pleasures of the Earth lead to happy heaven; Man/Adept is drunk by love for
God; whirling winds are the lessons of the wisdom of Gnosis and this letter of LVX.

62. O Lord God! let the haven be cast down by the fury of the storm! Let the
foam of the grape tincture my soul with Thy light!
The Ego cannot be tamed or killed. He is also a shape of Angel's seduction. Even more,
he is the Angel, as “I” see it. Jumping over your own shadow is impossible. There is no
difference between the Ego and the Angel; the Ego is the “difference.“ It is hard to
explain, but the nature of Angel and the Angel itself is not the same thing, every
mentioning of Him equally creates the Angel and the illusion of the Angel.
Let all existing that is “above“ and all that is “bellow“ be dedicated and delivered to
Adonai. May the diversity of colors be reduced to One Light. Duality is also expressed in
this testimony – first as heaven and the fury of the storm, then as the soul of man.

63. Bacchus grew old, and was Silenus; Pan was ever Pan for ever and ever
more throughout the aons.
Yet, earthly pleasures and enjoyments, although temporarily reflecting the thrill of Spirit,
are not the purpose or support for real and continuous achievement – a permanent direct
experience of Truth. The excitement of senses passes by overstimulating, but the Spirit
which pervades All (Pan) is always in the ecstasy of the Light of Nuit – through the Æons
in the “existence“ of time and space.
Pan is the entire manifestation of the Universe, the flow of time has no ultimate impact
on the wholeness, the Spirit which permeates all elements cannot fade or exhaust; the
Gods can be overthrown, but the Spirit of Light is above all.
64. Intoxicate the inmost, O my lover, not the outermost!
He addresses himself to devote all existing things to Adonai. One understands himself
and through his existence understands the Universe. God is not somewhere in a distant
throne, among the clouds of fantasy, God is inside the Man. Deus est Homo.

65. So was it— ever the same! I have aimed at the peeled wand of my God,
and I have hit; yea, I have hit.
Adonai is the Phallo of Spirit – the Oneness of God and Man. Initially, there is a division,
separation and relation of the “two“ co-participants of this LXV mystery, but lastly, even
through the Understanding of the Earth, it comes to the realization that this “two“ are
inseparable and only One.

CHAPTER II
1. I passed into the mountain of lapis-lazuli, even as a green hawk between
the pillars of turquoise that is seated upon the throne of the East.
Crystal clear awareness, as a true nature of Adept.
The initiation mountain is in a heavenly blue color, which reflects Adonai. He is the
green hawk, green as air and active like the hawk; in the East where the throne of the
Sun, the Provider of Illumination, between the pillars of polarity. The Adept is “in shape”
of the green hawk, the most sacred shape of air, and therefore in the image of the Sun that
controls the world from the East (the place where the Sun is “born”).

2. So came I to Duant, the starry abode, and I heard voices crying aloud.
Duant, the starry abode is Chokmah, every Soul-Star, either a man or woman, has his
own voice, his word and the proclamation of Truth.

3. O Thou that sittest upon the Earth! (so spake a certain Veiled One to me)
thou art not greater than thy mother! Thou speck of dust infinitesimal! Thou
art the Lord of Glory, and the unclean dog.
The idea under the veil, the Veiled One, is Isis, she addresses the Adept's soul, who is
incarnated on Earth – she is the celestial “He” of Tetragrammaton, as his body is “He” of
the Kingdom. In that “way,” he cannot be greater or “more important” than Binah as
Understanding – the whole structure of the Universe has its meaning, a stone from the
earth cannot be thrown further than the sky.
This verse also shows three pairs of duality. There is a relationship of “Goddess” and the
initiate, a comparison of her “size” and his material “insignificance,” as well as the
relation of the glory of the spirit and animality of crude human qualities.

4. Stooping down, dipping my wings, I came unto the darkly-splendid abodes.

There in that formless abyss was I made a partaker of the Mysteries Averse.
He “descended” consciously from the sphere of the supreme triad below the boundary of
Abyss, grasping the attributes of the created Universe. In this, everything is inverted in
relation to the Consciousness that resides above the Abyss. The material is “inversion”
and opposition of the Spiritual, as one more concept of duality relations.

5. I suffered the deadly embrace of the Snake and of the Goat; I paid the
infernal homage to the shame of Khem.
Snake and Goat are paths of Ayin and Nun – “ON” – a dual relationship between a
“male” and “female” cosmic principle.
Khem is “black earth,” a manifest world in which spiritual incarnates in a single “human”
carrier.
Suffering is one of the features of burning in the fire of the world, infernal homage refers
to Geburah – and gives a specific indication of the Great Magical Operations of the
Adeptus Major who performs Magick that empowers and realizes His Great Work.

6. Therein was this virtue, that the One became the all.
One of the descriptions of Tiphareth.
From One – Kether – all was manifested and created - Pan - whose center is the Sun.

7. Moreover I beheld a vision of a river. There was a little boat thereon; and
in it under purple sails was a golden woman, an image of Asi wrought in
finest gold. Also the river was of blood, and the boat of shining steel. Then I
loved her; and, loosing my girdle, cast myself into the stream.
The Grade of the Babe of the Abyss that does not have a Robe, that loves Binah, the
Great Mother.
Netzach; the river of life, carries the soul (a little boat) which inspires and guides by the
image of the Goddess of Understanding – Asi – Isis. The girdle is the Circle that
surrounds the identity of a man – by freeing himself from limited personal attachments
he yields himself to the Flow.

8. I gathered myself into the little boat, and for many days and nights did I
love her, burning beautiful incense before her.
Hod; conscious and thoughtful loyalty to the guiding idea, which is empowered by the
incense of the inspiration of the mind.
Here, also, is the relationship between the Adept and Adonai; the small boat that sails the
river is Adonai's support for the great Love of Adept towards him.

9. Yea! I gave her of the flower of my youth.

Yesod – the flower of energized enthusiasm.
The ideal of the Spirit; Adonai himself is the focus of Adept's worship.
10. But she stirred not; only by my kisses I defiled her so that she turned to
black-ness before me.
Adonai is not a changeable form or idea, “it” is the complex of the Spiritual Force and
therefore it “stirred not” because it is behind, outside the elements. “It” can be
worshipped so immensely to shape his character and figure so “it” can get a “material”
form in Malkuth, but it is a “dirty” and unreal image which is not the reality of the
spiritual essence of God.

11. Yet I worshipped her, and gave her of the flower of my youth.
The Fool worships God without distinction, both on “higher” levels, and in the Kingdom
of matter. The Fool does not make the difference between the “figures” of God he
worships because he “knows” that God is present in every “part” and every element of
the Universe.

12. Also it came to pass, that thereby she sickened, and corrupted before me.
Almost I cast myself into the stream.
He possesses the potentials and attributes of Magus Wisdom, while “she” is
Understanding. He surrendered so much to the relationship between “him” and “God”
that it becomes corrupted, and strengthened duality. This enchants and binds the Adept.

13. Then at the end appointed her body was whiter than the milk of the stars,
and her lips red and warm as the sunset, and her life of a white heat like the
heat of the midmost sun.
Gimel; the High priestess of the Silver Star – this is a “description” of her appearance in
the Light.
The appointed end is the Crown, with her light and her qualities she is reflecting
“herself” through the Sun in its “positions” during the day. She is the connection between
Kether and Tiphareth.

14. Then rose she up from the abyss of Ages of Sleep, and her body embraced
me. Altogether I melted into her beauty and was glad.
Daleth – the Great Babalon – this also is one of the “images” of Adonai.

15. The river also became the river of Amrit, and the little boat was the
chariot of the flesh, and the sails thereof the blood of the heart that beareth
me, that beareth me.
Heh – The Star; the Trinity of connected dualities that represent the “overflow” of
Aquarius, where the river becomes Amrit, the boat becomes a chariot, the sails are the
blood of the heart, they are identical to the “functions” and features of Adonai, which is
comprehended by releasing the flow of Aquarius.
The river is, for some, the force which drives a man, for the others is pleasure and
blessing of ecstasy of the immortal perception of life; the boat is the soul-body as well as
 the chariot of the flash which are more apparent kinds of soul's physical carrier; the wind
of the mind empowers the sails of the boat, and in this way man governs his life by
intelligence, the blood of the heart is, in fact, a force that maintains the presence of the
soul within the body.
The Will is the Self. It is very hard to define, except as a form of living Enthusiasm. The
Will is the Spirit itself within, as well as without. The outward projection is perceived as
an Angel, while inward it is the Will.

16. O serpent woman of the stars! I, even I, have fashioned Thee from a pale
image of fine gold.
He addresses to Adonai realizing him as Nuit – which he showed to himself on the other
plane as a pale image of fine gold, therefore, as the solar light of Adonai.

17. Also the Holy One came upon me, and I beheld a white swan floating in
the blue.
The Holy One is, of course, Adonai, and here Adept conceives him as the white swan
which floating in the blue – on the heights of the Spirit.
This Vision is suitable for the indicated plane, which is dispersed through the element of
the Air (the attribute of the entire chapter of this book).

18. Between its wings I sate, and the aons fled away.
Adonai always carries the Soul, the existence of consciousness embodied in the life force
always “relies” on Divine support.
Cheth (“Chariot” which conveys Adept).

19. Then the swan flew and dived and soared, yet no whither we went.
There is no beginning or end; there is no determinant of flight for a series of incarnations;
the serpentine movement, the waves of incarnations in which the soul resides in the
world. The continuum is so “long” that it goes into infinity, and thus the meaning of
existence cannot be seen. The Adept does not understand the meaning of existence as a
“man” (but it will understand it as a Magister when he realizes the oneness and
inseparability with Adonai).

20. A little crazy boy that rode with me spake unto the swan, and said:
Yod, the Mercurial human intelligence of Ruach, is a “child” regarding the Spiritual
“greatness” of God. He continues to persist in a “relationship” with God and still does not
go beyond the separation of duality.

21. Who art thou that dost float and fly and dive and soar in the inane?
Behold, these many aons have passed; whence camest thou? Whither wilt
thou go?
Kaph; Dynamics of the Universe – he is surprised by “nonsense” of the Universe's
existence, because Ruach cannot understand the Spiritual – it comprehends activities,
 occurrences, events, space and time of the Universe, he tries to come closer by desire to
understand the meaning of the mind – therefore asks Adonai for instruction and Gnosis,
for explanation of Adonai's nature.

22. And laughing I chid him, saying: No whence! No whither!

Non-action. Removing attributes, with the remaining of pure nouns. Here the Aspirant's
mind uses the essential form of Tathāgata – the true nature of Buddha.
It is true that Adonai, in its “purest” and “most meaningful” sense, is actually Nothing –
AIN/Nuit. The Adept is “rebuked” because his mind should already understand the
structure of the Universe, and that he has agreed on the meaning of existence through the
Qabalah and observing the manifested nature (below the Abyss), and thus he may already
have the realization that “this” highest Spiritual, essentially and above All, only
interpreted as “Nothing” – is the furthermost, so-called “third” veil of the “negative
existence” above the Tree of Life.

23. The swan being silent, he answered: Then, if with no goal, why this
eternal journey?
Maim gives a certain impression of the “purpose of existence,” or the eternal journey –
and that is the idea about how the Deity creates the world in its own intention and that the
human souls are bearers of the inner Light, which are incarnated for the Mystery of that
Creation.
24. And I laid my head against the Head of the Swan, and laughed, saying: Is
there not joy ineffable in this aimless winging? Is there not weariness and
impatience for who would attain to some goal?
For pure will, unassuaged of purpose, delivered from the lust of result, is every way
perfect.
The one who does not know where he goes always arrives on the destination, for him,
there is no difference between right and the wrong way. An arrow which is not released
always hits the target.
“They” are very close by their essence at this moment, yet only “leaning” to each other,
there are still not One; he surrendered to the flight of the Lover.
The one who “wishes” to achieve the Aim lives in the fixation on the “wrong” ideal since
the only true ideal is inside the understanding of Oneness with Adonai. It is impossible to
predict the time of fulfillment that goal; it brings restlessness, concern, suffering, a
multitude of mental suppression of life circumstances which do not attain the real goal –
residing in Divine Spirit.

25. And the swan was ever silent. Ah! but we floated in the infinite Abyss.
Joy! Joy! White swan, bear thou ever me up between thy wings!
Adonai dwells in Silence, while shapes and visions shifts in the mind of Adept.
Path of the Arrow going upward – a pillar by which consciousness raises from the
Kingdom and Foundation to the Sun that receives the Light of the Crown.
 In the heavens, the constellation of Swan is very similar to the appearance of the Cross,
between thy wings is an allusion to the center in relation to the cross of the Element –
that is, the Spirit.

26. O silence! O rapture! O end of things visible and invisible! This is all
mine, who am Not.
It seems that here Adept also, carried by ecstasy, reaches the perception and experience
that he is the Highest Nothingness – one with Nuit, who appears to him (occasionally) as
Adonai.
It is now evident that the earlier statement of the Swan, which floats in the blaze of
Abyss, is Adeptus Exemptus, the Liberated Adept.

27. Radiant God! Let me fashion an image of gems and gold for Thee! that
the people may cast it down and trample it to dust! That Thy glory may be
seen of them.
Torched tower of man's elemental and transient materiality shines upon the Eye of
Illumination. The tower is a fantastic and powerful construction (as well as the image of
gems and gold – which are symbols of the quality of the soul), but it must fall like an
“egoism” (that the people may cast it down and trample it to dust – dust is thoughts of
the mind, ideas by which the mind tries to explain the beauty of an image, certain
feelings that appear in the soul when it comes to comprehension of Adonai.

28. Nor shall it be spoken in the markets that I am come who should come;
but Thy coming shall be the one word.
He is the Emperor, the ruler, the Prophet of the Ancient Gods, as the carrier and emitter
of Divine Providence, he is not “important” – important is the Word which is the
vibration of the Truth of the Universe and the Human Soul.
This is also the Word of Æon of every incarnated Magus, who announces his conception
of the Cosmic Gnosis of Adonai.
And how few truly understand this comment – yet enjoying the happy circumstance that
such a beautiful Gnosis came into the world through it.

29. Thou shalt manifest Thyself in the unmanifest; in the secret places men
shall meet with thee, and Thou shalt overcome them.
Secret places are from the path of Qoph, the hidden places, and the twelfth house of the
zodiac of man's incarnation.

30. I saw a pale sad boy that lay upon the marble in the sunlight, and wept.
By his side was the forgotten lute. Ah! but he wept.
200 – the Sun; mysteries of the path of Resh. Adonai now shows vision to Adept in
which there is a relation of a boy lying on the earth; above him is the Sun, and the lute is
 not played because personal work stops as we are enjoying in the beauty of the Sun's
light. He cries out of happiness and excitement of such beauty.
31. Then came an eagle from the abyss of glory and overshadowed him. So
black was the shadow that he was no more visible.
The vision of Æon; Eagle of Lagash – LGSh is 333, which overlaps by shadow, the
Divinity of the Fire of Logos and the Ruler of Æon. The air (of this whole chapter) is a
gathering of infinite thoughts that hide the true Vision of Adonai – so that the Adept
does not see his Glory or Light.

32. But I heard the lute lively discoursing through the blue still air.
Lute, a wind instrument, an instrument of air. Lively discoursing – an Adept who is in
possession of the name of his Angel, and the living Word of Æon. Through the blue still
air – so he advances through the blue spheres of Chesed, becoming the Adeptus
Exemptus.
The sound penetrates through the Kingdom. The sound is the thought; the lute is the
Mind, the air is the Soul/Spirit.

33. Ah! messenger of the beloved One, let Thy shadow be over me!
Adonai is the messenger of Nuit. The Adept realizes that His Love is directed to Nuit, but
his soul must first grasp all peculiarity of the Universe, as well as the divine
manifestation called Adonai – so with the hierarchy of achievement he could reach the
Oneness with Her.

34. Thy name is Death, it may be, or Shame, or Love. So thou bringest me
tidings of the Beloved One, I shall not ask thy name.
He tries to understand Adonai – giving him various characteristics, depending on how he
“tries” to think of him and to understand his endless possibilities of appearance for the
assigned soul. He realizes that Adonai is like Metatron, the messenger, the “archangel” of
the Crown and the Light, by which the Goddess of Eternity, who is Nothing, is covered.
He gives him epithets, he thinks about him but refuses to dare to define him as a constant
– a Name.

35. Where is now the Master? cry the little crazy boys. He is dead! He is
shamed! He is wedded! and their mockery shall ring round the world.
The Magister is wedded to Adonai, which means he has understood the Oneness with
him and the essential inseparability.
He is dead – the Man of Earth (because he does not realize the Spirit in matter); He is
shamed – the Lover (because he resides in separation, duality); He is wedded – the
Hermit – He is One, there is no Him and God, he is a Magister who is both Man and
God, without difference.
36. But the Master shall have had his reward. The laughter of the mockers
shall be a ripple in the hair of the Beloved One.
Master's reward is the Spiritual Understanding and the Peace that arises from the
realization of Oneness with Adonai. Magister is Adonai.

37. Behold! the Abyss of the Great Deep. Therein is a mighty dolphin, lashing
his sides with the force of the waves.
Again, Adonai is shown in Vision; a powerful thought “swims” in the depths of the
Abyss – Adonai is not a powerful thought or force that “swims” through Ruach, he is the
energy of the Spiritual Consciousness that “swims” over Infinite Abyss (of Chaos).

38. There is also an harper of gold, playing infinite tunes.

A new vision of Adonai - he plays infinite tunes - always inspiring the soul of Adept.

39. Then the dolphin delighted therein, and put off his body, and became a
bird.
Adonai's vision changes itself by shifting the plain of perception of him and the world.
Streaming of water visions.

40. The harper also laid aside his harp, and played infinite tunes upon the
Pan-pipe.
Adonai produces sounds – the vibrations of the existence of Everything – Pan.

41. Then the bird desired exceedingly this bliss, and laying down its wings
became a faun of the forest.
The vision changes, an Adept seizes the appearances of Adonai looking meaningful to
him, in everything “seen.”

42. The harper also laid down his Pan-pipe, and with the human voice sang
his infinite tunes.
Evolution of the Vision, after the symbols of beings and animals, Adonai appears to him
as a Man indicating that Adonai is a Man, Adonai is Him. That is what he sees in the
vision. An Adept sees himself, sees Adonai.

43. Then the faun was enraptured, and followed far; at last the harper was
silent, and the faun became Pan in the midst of the primal forest of Eternity.
Vibrations of the elements are the consistency of the Universe, of All (which is Pan). All
this “exists” within the Body of Goddess Nuit.
44. Thou canst not charm the dolphin with silence, O my prophet!
Adonai cannot be decorated with silence when he is already a silent Self. Silence is only a
method by which his nature is perceived and nothing more.

45. Then the adept was rapt away in bliss, and the beyond of bliss, and
exceeded the excess of excess.
The vibration of Adonai impregnates every part of Adept's being, covering him by the
light of Nuit.

46. Also his body shook and staggered with the burden of that bliss and that
excess and that ultimate nameless.
The body shook is Kriya, energetic layoffs and flows of Pra-Nua whose nameless
consciousness carries Kundalini.

47. They cried He is drunk or He is mad or He is in pain or He is about to

die; and he heard them not.
He is drunk – deviation of the Water element; he is mad – the distortion of Air; he is in
pain – the burden of Earth; he is about to die – the lack of Fire of life. He heard them
not – this is the “positive” attribute of limitlessness expressed by the negation of the
Spiritual part.
48. O my Lord, my beloved! How shall I indite songs, when even the memory
of the shadow of thy glory is a thing beyond all music of speech or of silence?
Both speech and silence are just concepts that represent an idea that, by its very nature, is
neither loud nor silent, nor is the speech an idea opposite to silence. Logos itself is “just”
at the plane of Chokmah.
How to compose a “song” as the vibration of the Spirit, when Adonai is perfect than the
“sound,” he is above the vibration of “sound,” i.e., thought; he is the Spirit, he is a
Silence.

49. Behold! I am a man. Even a little child might not endure Thee. And lo!
Man is 666, he is the bearer of the Light of the Sun, and therefore of Adonai; and even
the child Hoor-Paar-Kraat as the Silent form of the Sun God is not his “real” transmitter.

50. I was alone in a great park, and by a certain hillock was a ring of deep
enamelled grass wherein green-clad ones, most beautiful, played.
He tries to explain it with the next vision; he is looking for a hillock – inspiration in a
new way; he tries to explain Adonai to himself differently.

51. In their play I came even unto the land of Fairy Sleep. All my thoughts
were clad in green; most beautiful were they.
Green is the color of Air and the Venus; Fairy Sleep is delirium of the mind's rapture,
 which however is silent, and the thoughts that appear reflect a higher meaning; they are
not mere and randomly occurrence, but represent the harmony of thoughts about the
nature of Adonai.

52. All night they danced and sang; but Thou art the morning, O my darling,
my serpent that twinest Thee about this heart.
Everything that a man can do alone is nothing compared to what Adonai does through
him.

53. I am the heart, and Thou the serpent. Wind Thy coils closer about me, so
that no light nor bliss may penetrate.
Participation in the act leads to spiritual impotence. There is no place even for joy. Every
Adept's action and interaction with Reality is a particular coil of the serpent around the
heart.
The Invocation of the Adonai must be done from the heart and should be such that it
connects the mind with any possible idea of Adonai, that no external influence would
divert Adept from loving relationship with God.
Even further, is there anything “outward,” is there anything “further” that it is not from
Adonai?

54. Crush out the blood of me, as a grape upon the tongue of a white Doric
girl that languishes with her lover in the moonlight.
Personal identity must be released, so the soul could be receptive to “something” that is
not an Ego, but “something” which is Invoked by vibration of the thoughts and words –
which does not seek to understand “itself” but Adonai, because “it” is an inferior
reflection – the image of Adonai.

55. Then let the End awake. Long hast thou slept, O great God Terminus!
Long ages hast thou waited at the end of the city and the roads thereof.
Awake Thou! wait no more!
The End is the orgasm of reaching the Crown where Death is the gate through which the
soul transforms into One Light; spiritual Phallos has long been a “dormant” – Adept now
understands the energy of the active principle of God's nature.

56. Nay, Lord! but I am come to Thee. It is I that wait at last.

The man actively strives for the knowledge of Adonai; at the same time, he must be calm
and passive in order to sense Adonai's presence. The Adept presented the approach to
work through the form of Hexagram.
The Holy Hexagram is blue erect; it is the only accurate method of an Adept. Every ritual
or meditation is a form of passive expectation for loved Adonai, with attention and joy,
like a child playing hide and seek and now waiting to be revealed. And the more it waits,
the more joyous and ecstatically it will be. In the same time, a joy to be hidden and a Will
to be revealed – that is the whole point of Abramelin’s work.
57. The prophet cried against the mountain; come thou hither, that I may
speak with thee!
He sees himself, now, as the Prophet, and Adonai is a mountain – but God will not
respond to those who suppose they are separate from “him.”

58. The mountain stirred not. Therefore went the prophet unto the mountain,
and spake unto it. But the feet of the prophet were weary, and the mountain
heard not his voice.
The Adept continues to dwell in duality, he sees itself as the minister of Adonai, the
emissary, the transmitter of Gnosis, the Logos of Æon, but does not yet experience
inseparability, therefore went unto the mountain; he thinks he is closer to Adonai if he is
able to speak to him.

59. But I have called unto Thee, and I have journeyed unto Thee, and it
availed me not.
As long as the Adept thinks he should call or “invoke” Adonai, he will not reach the
“result” – the only true “result” and the real goal is to understand that Man is God.

60. I waited patiently, and Thou wast with me from the beginning.
The mere invocation and desire are evidence of separation. The invocation of Angel is
the same as banishing Him. In case you fail to invoke the Angel, it is good as long as you
fail to invoke Him.
The Adept thinks that he should “go” to God, or he should “wait” for God to call him –
he has to understand that Adonai is always here – he is Adonai himself.

61. This now I know, O my beloved, and we are stretched at our ease among
the vines.
Confirms His Gnosis – the Knowledge, He “Knows” (Daath); He is very “close” to the
union, for he approached the vines, to the legacy of the Generation that cannot disappear,
to the Pneumatics.

62. But these thy prophets; they must cry aloud and scourge themselves; they
must cross trackless wastes and unfathomed oceans; to await Thee is the end,
not the beginning.
The man is constructed in a way that in the “beginning” he does not understand that
Adonai is in him, that he is a manifestation of Adonai and that he only needs to awaken
those dormant and forgotten capacities that give him the impression of separation in the
first place. So the Aspirant “goes” on that Spiritual path, continually endeavoring to
perceive Adonai, until, in the end, it happens. The concept of the end is different than
from the beginning of the Spiritual (Inner) quest.
63. Let darkness cover up the writing! Let the scribe depart among his ways.
Only Darkness covers the Light – LVX. This writing, as Liber LXV. Darkness covers
Everything. The Fall of the Night of Pan. The number of the verse – 6 and 3, Tiphareth
and Binah, or Samekh and Gimmel. Sun and the Moon, LVX, and NOX.

64. But thou and I are stretched at our ease among the vines; what is he?
There is a loving relationship between God and Man; the union and the marriage between
them are not the subjects of this Mystery (this is described in the Book of Lapidis Lazuli).

65. O Thou beloved One! is there not an end? Nay, but there is an end.
Awake! arise! gird up thy limbs, O thou runner; bear thou the Word unto the
mighty cities, yea, unto the mighty cities.
There is an end to the rule of animal qualities over spiritual – by the man's entry into the
Adeptship; there is the end of Ego – by crossing the Abyss on the Tree of Life; there is
the end of the Spiritual – by Incarnation in One Light (LVX) from which the Word (air)
of Wisdom of Æon is emanated. Each end is the negation (“No”) of previous “state,”
each end is the awakening and rising into the new “reality.” However, a certain
“vibration,” or Word, is a sign of Achievement – this Word is the mark of Incarnated
Divine Spirit of Light.
In Tiphareth, the work is still forthcoming. And very close to that is Geburah intimidation
over Tiphareth. Mars is above the Sun, but as a projection of specific kind of action
which, until then, the Aspirant has never experienced in his Being. We should not try to
seek plain planetary aspects in this, but a particular type of Change that expresses through
the Adept's Enthusiasm. For it has been said: even if everyone gathered to harm you, they
would harm you only as much as God has prescribed.

CHAPTER III
1. Verily and Amen! I passed through the deep sea, and by the rivers of
running water that abound therein, and I came unto the Land of No Desire.
Where the sea is deep and where the rivers are wild, there is desire. Allusions to passing
through the City of the Pyramids.
Sea, water and rivers are the vastness of the Flows of the living Pra-Nu that makes the
Universe. Passing through all these “worlds” and spheres, he comes beyond Everything –
beyond the Watery nature, to the state of No Desire – Nothing/AIN.
Amen – Kether.

2. Wherein was a white unicorn with a silver collar, whereon was graven the
aphorism Linea viridis gyrat universa.
Chokmah – Stellar Unicorn – each Star has one “horn,” one Force, one True Will, and
unique Nature, each connected with Immensity by circle or “belt” – the green color is a
“watery” reflection of the Goddess of Eternity – she surrounds manifested universe.
Horn is placed on Ajna chakra, which is the center of Will.
The nature of the Vision in this chapter shows Adonai through “water” aspects, and how
they, or “He,” affects Adept.

3. Then the word of Adonai came unto me by the mouth of the Magister mine,
saying: O heart that art girt about with the coils of the old serpent, lift up
thyself unto the mountain of initiation!
Adonai conveys a message to the lower spheres, within the Spirit of the Master, to the
soul; God invites Man to be awake in the Spirit.
Adonai is the God, Magister is Binah, Adept is Tiphareth – a heart that is girt with the
coils of the old serpent, old impressions of spiritual dedication that did not allow
complete initiation.

4. But I remembered. Yea, Than, yea, Theli, yea, Lilith! these three were
about me from of old. For they are one.
Three water aspects; three “women” – manifested from Binah to Chesed, they take on the
characteristics opposite to Understanding; these are three passive “defects” of an Adept.
However, if they creatively integrate into the soul of Adept, they represent three forms of
Kundalini awakening – by passive, “fluent” way of Work.

5. Beautiful wast thou, O Lilith, thou serpent-woman!

Lilith is the serpent-woman – Teth, as Adonai is the snake that surrounds the Egg of
Spirit.
Impregnation by Water makes him perceive this as a temptation by serpent force and
shows him Adonai as a serpent.

6. Thou wast lithe and delicious to the taste, and thy perfume was of musk
mingled with ambergris.
Tiphareth in which the attributes of Water are projected.
Lithe – Earth of Water; delicious – Water of Water; perfume (as scent contains combined
Fire and Air) is the Air of Water and Fire of Water; subtle radiation of the four “court
water cards” of Tarot.
These are the attributes of Lilith, as Adonai shows himself to Adept through water
currents.

7. Close didst thou cling with thy coils unto the heart, and it was as the joy of
all the spring.
Adept continues to experience Adonai as the serpent-woman Lilith, the watery
enchanting passion of the Goddess of Love.

8. But I beheld in thee a certain taint, even in that wherein I delighted.

 Hod – intelligence and the mind, thinking process “spoils” emotions and feelings.

9. I beheld in thee the taint of thy father the ape, of thy grandsire the Blind
Worm of Slime.
Yesod; Yod of Tetragrammaton as an animal display in the form of an ape is proclaimed
as “father” (Chokmah) of serpent-woman; grandsire the Blind Worm of Slime is a
distorted understanding of the Ouroboros which gird the Universe. Previously mentioned
green circle or belt as a pure form of infinity, at a lower plane is “seen” as a Blind Worm,
as a meaningless and blind force that holds in existence the manifestation of “visible”
Universe.

10. I gazed upon the Crystal of the Future, and I saw the horror of the End of
thee.
Malkuth – Crystal. The kingdom has an End that is “terrible” because everything created,
must exist and disappear – to be destroyed, and by understanding this “through” Water,
with emotions, the soul of Adept cares about the “future”.

11. Further, I destroyed the time Past, and the time to Come— had I not the
Power of the Sand-glass?
The Fool is not conditioned by time.

12. But in the very hour I beheld corruption.

Beth; corruption – one of the Air deviations oppressed by Water influences.

13. Then I said: O my beloved, O Lord Adonai, I pray thee to loosen the coils
of the serpent!
Gimel; Adept is awakening from a vision, but experiences a powerful “water” grip of the
serpent's feelings.

14. But she was closed fast upon me, so that my Force was stayed in its
inception.
Only the body and the soul can feel this grip as an embarrassment because they still do
not realize Adonai as untenable and unavoidable – he does His Will, which is in fact
“concealed” True Will of Adept. Adept cannot reject Spirituality no matter how great and
binding the obligation of Work and “serving“ the Spirit can be.
Adept has no Force – all Force comes from God only. If a Work is indecent and
inappropriate, a man will not have the strength to carry it out – Adonai empowers the
“right” Work while preventing those who are not in alliance with the True Will of Adept.

15. Also I prayed unto the Elephant God, the Lord of Beginnings, who
breaketh down obstruction.
The Force and the Mind. Both strength and intellect, Ganesha is a projection of Shiva's
nature; in a particular way as the Adeptus Major could realize it.
Ganesha opens the roads, like the Ptah of Egyptians, the Great Architect of the Universe;
 Adept invited him, summoned him, thought that this was the image of the Supreme
Deity.

16. These gods came right quickly to mine aid. I beheld them; I joined myself
unto them; I was lost in their vastness.
The aim was partly well-defined, Adept was striving for the Highest, but his
understanding of the Highest was “colored” by Water - the Gods came as a reflection of
the force of his aspiration to the Highest – he saw them (Vision), he was with them – also
reached the state above the Abyss – therefore he was lost – his ego/soul was enthusiastic
and shocked by the achievement.
Vau – the magnitude of Stellar Gods who “descend” from Chokmah to Chesed.

17. Then I beheld myself compassed about with the Infinite Circle of Emerald
that encloseth the Universe.
Zayin; there is the connection of Adept (as the Centre) with the Infinity (seen as the
Emerald Circle of the Goddess) – he is near the Vision of Hadit (himself) and Nuit.

18. O Snake of Emerald, Thou hast no time Past, no time To Come. Verily
Thou art not.
Cheth; the fence is like a circle, just one of the “symbols” of Infinity – Nuit. “Charioting”
is a continuum above the concept of “time,” as duration. On the path of Cheth, Adept is
the guardian of the border of Eternity – around him is the Goddess Nuit, in the
watercourses of the Stellar space.
NU. The essence that is reflected in the first verse of Tao Te Ching; we cannot agree with
the majority of translations so far. The closest to truth would be certainly: “the way to go
is not the Eternal Way”.

19. Thou art delicious beyond all taste and touch, Thou art not-to-be-beheld
for glory, Thy voice is beyond the Speech and the Silence and the Speech
therein, and Thy perfume is of pure ambergris, that is not weighed against
the finest gold of the fine gold.
Teth – Passion and Understanding of the Goddess Babalon riding above the
elemental/planetary Beast of Ruach. Understanding cannot be felt by the senses; it cannot
be described and glorified by the human mind; the soul cannot convey the true
impression of the achievement of Understanding. There is a certain Divine fragrance
which is released by elements “nourished” by the Force of the Goddess of
Understanding.
Thy voice is beyond the Speech and the Silence and the Speech therein. Unmanifest. But
equally, Chokmah. The Aspirant should think of defining Negative toward this; he must
prevent his enthusiasm from equalizing these two concepts.

20. Also Thy coils are of infinite range; the Heart that Thou dost encircle is
an Universal Heart.
It is again understood that Adonai is one of the “lower” images of Endlessness, as It –
Nothing is “shown” to the soul of Adept. He realizes that he is composed of universal
 elements from which everything is made, and the Divine Circle – Adonai/Nuit is
“beyond” that comprehensible.
Yod – Tarot card “Hermit” shows this Heart-egg wrapped by a serpent.

21. I, and Me, and Mine were sitting with lutes in the market-place of the
great city, the city of the violets and the roses.
I and Me and Mine – the essential attributes of Ego.
Kaph – the Wheel of “Fortune” on which three Human (egoistic) personalities spins.
Each part of the soul of Man/Adept has its impression and perception of itself and
everything (universe), which is transmitting to the lutes – expressing his understanding
through the multitude of the great city which is of violets and roses. That is an allusion on
the Order of the Lilly and the Order of the Rose Cross – the teachers of the Mystery of
Women and the Mystery of Man, since Kaph = K + P – Kteis & Phallos.

22. The night fell, and the music of the lutes was stilled.
The process of thought is destroyed (through the practice of Yoga) – the expression of
thought is silenced.
The internal influence of spiritual work is balanced with the outer emanations of Ruach.

23. The tempest arose, and the music of the lutes was stilled.
Maim/Tempest – the power of water is developing, launching the force whirl of the
Power of Water – feelings – reduces the acting of mental processes.

24. The hour passed, and the music of the lutes was stilled.
Consistent persistence and continual dedication to Spiritual Work influence the reduction
of thought processes and the disturbing effect of thought on the conscious perception of
Adept.

25. But Thou art Eternity and Space; Thou art Matter and Motion; and Thou
art the negation of all these things.
Samekh – the Art that alchemically unites three “types” of polarity; Eternity and Space is
the continuum of endlessness; Matter and Motion are material, “water” category of Nuit
and Hadit; Negation of all these things is a duality of all existing and Nothing which is
“behind” Everything.

26. For there is no Symbol of Thee.

Not even the symbol of Baphomet, nor Abraxas, as the most convenient intellectual
representations of Adonai, are suitable, because Adonai is not in that images, nor he is in
the senses – there is no definite symbol for That what is Divine, Nothing – there is no is a
symbol, terminology for AIN.
Something that is One and Only has no purpose for the symbol because this symbol is a
Lie as any other. One is the Only, Everything Else is the Other. But even the false Truth
is the Truth about the lies of the Truth. Tathagata as a real name of Buddha.

27. If I say Come up upon the mountains! the celestial waters flow at my
word. But thou art the Water beyond the waters.
Pe – the Tower – as seen in the vision of the Water of the Spirit; Adept activates Flows of
the Force, he rules upon Magick and elemental energies – he is able to wake Snake
Kundalini. Yet, Adonai is Water beyond the waters. Nothing above Binah.

28. The red three-angled heart hath been set up in Thy shrine; for the priests
despised equally the shrine and the god.
Tzaddi – red heart filled with the power of Fire-Water; the heart is empowered with
feelings; Horus is the secret Flame of the shrine (the shrine is a representation of watery
adoration of God); Adonai again shows to Adept in an appropriate way. The ideas of the
shrine (Adept) and the god (Adonai) also represent a dual relationship and are not
recognized by the Masters of the Temple as a refined spiritual state.

29. Yet all the while Thou wast hidden therein, as the Lord of Silence is
hidden in the buds of the lotus.
Qoph – the lunar nature of the silence, calmness and concealment of Hoor-Paar-Kraat. He
is a child born in Lotus, “Padmasambhava” – Om Mani Padme Hum – “greetings to You
Born in Lotus.” The Child of Silence is the essence of the Spiritual Egg.

30. Thou art Sebek the crocodile against Asar; thou art Mati, the Slayer in
the Deep. Thou art Typhon, the Wrath of the Elements, O Thou who
transcendest the Forces in their Concourse and Cohesion, in their Death and
their Disruption. Thou art Python, the terrible serpent about the end of all
things!
Sebek – Mati – Typhon are “watery” monsters – the vast Water attributes of the Sun
itself, which are “catastrophic” in their sense of the expression – the ways in which Adept
conceives these Forces.
Crocodile “swims” on the surface of Consciousness; Mati “dives” through the regions of
the Unconscious; Typhon is the devastating power of the Higher Consciousness. All this
tends to purify the soul of Adept; all these are forces that Adonai uses to perfect and
initiate Adept into the most important Mystery – in the “Yoga” itself, Unity of Adonai
and Adept.
Concourse is a state of approaching of God and man, they are “merging” – there is
Cohesion; Death annuls the solar Ego identity; Disruption is the burning of the soul; after
these four elements, again appears the Spirit in the form of a circle – Python, which is
about the end of all things – he is Adonai/Nuit.

31. I turned me about thrice in every way; and always I came at the last unto
Thee.
Shin – three arms of the letter with the turn of the force in every way. You can always
come only to Adonai – Fire of Adonai. Adonai is the final ending of all the methods.
As before, every act is an act of love between Adept and the Angel. Everything exists
only because of “You.” Each event is an eye of the God who looks at you, who looks at
 you.

32. Many things I beheld mediate and immediate; but, beholding them no
more, I beheld Thee.
Tau; all visions are displays of God, shapes that give instruction and the meaning of the
relationship between Adept and Adonai; when the observation is stopped, then the
visions, images and impressions are withdrawn – because the mind – Air (Ruach) is no
longer fed by feelings and emotions of spiritual, religious aspiration, so the “reality” –
Adonai himself displayed as “it is”.

33. Come thou, O beloved One, O Lord God of the Universe, O Vast One, O
Minute One! I am Thy beloved.
Kether; Adept invokes the Highest; he is inspired by spiritual emotions; he is motivated
by the exaltedness of the Deity. He realizes that he is a Lover (Adept – Thelemite).
Beloved One – Water; Lord – Earth; Vast One – Air; Minute One – Fire; Thy beloved
– Spirit.
Come thou represents another confirmation of duality that Adept tends to overcome.

34. All day I sing of Thy delight; all night I delight in Thy song.
Chokmah; day – night; delight – song; the polarity of space that is filled with stars.
He sings the Wisdom that comes from the joy of inspiration, then he hears the Wisdom
from Adonai; day and night are also the relationship of the conscious and the
unconscious as well as the activity and passivity, the polarity of Sephira which is 2 –
Chokmah – the Father of Adonai.

35. There is no other day or night than this.

Understanding gives the impression that polarity is just a “reflection” of the
manifestation of the One.
Relation of AIN (there is no) toward Chokmah (other day) and Binah (or night). Than
this – Kether.

36. Thou art beyond the day and the night; I am Thyself, O my Maker, my
Master, my Mate!
Adonai is Spiritual Consciousness – finally uttering the Truth of Unity – I am Thyself –
then follows the threefold relation of the Lover. Yod + He + He, where Adept is Vau –
Shin (which are united).

37. I am like the little red dog that sitteth upon the knees of the Unknown.
Geburah – this is a Fire verse under the influence of Water; The red dog is Geburah,
which is calm and serene in the feelings toward Adonai – who is Unknown –
Nothing/Ain.

38. Thou hast brought me into great delight. Thou hast given me of Thy flesh
to eat and of Thy blood for an offering of intoxication.
 Tiphareth; still through duality, he interprets Unity with Adonai toward himself. Adept is
the body of Adonai; Adept is the incarnation of Adonai.

39. Thou hast fastened the fangs of Eternity in my soul, and the Poison of the
Infinite hath consumed me utterly.
Netzach; Adonai's acting on Adept in the lower spheres.

40. I am become like a luscious devil of Italy; a fair strong woman with worn
cheeks, eaten out with hunger for kisses. She hath played the harlot in divers
palaces; she hath given her body to the beasts.
Hod; Italy is a “land” of spirituality, the devil is a force of a man; he is a lover eaten by
hungry for Adonai's kisses; in many “sanctuaries” of the initiation, palaces of spiritual
improvement he pursued for Adonai; he entirely devoted himself to all the elements of
the beasts so he could perceive All.

41. She hath slain her kinsfolk with strong venom of toads; she hath been
scourged with many rods.
Yesod – sexual allusions, both to the “lower” animal unifying forces, and the Yesodic
compound of Phallos with Kteis.
Rotten feelings and emotions poison the highest aspiration – Adonai “punishes” such
deviations, since root energies are so raw that they can suppress any connection with the
force of Tetragrammaton.

42. She hath been broken in pieces upon the Wheel; the hands of the
hangman have bound her unto it.
Malkuth – the Cross which holds the circle of a Wheel; the Soul has experienced the
elements, knows them and understands that they are parts of the Endless circle of Wheel
that moves in time and space. The Soul is incarnated in the Kingdom; it is bound and
limited in the matter – still it is the projection of Adonai as well, who teaches the soul
about the feelings of life in the world of suffering.
43. The fountains of water have been loosed upon her; she hath struggled
with exceeding torment.
Miraculous “Water” display of the glyph of letter Aleph.

44. She hath burst in sunder with the weight of the waters; she hath sunk into
the awful Sea.
The waters permeate the “house” in which “the woman” suffers from emotions that
pushed her into the depths of the feelings – a man, when passive, is more receptive to
feelings, and his power is overflowing him; he sinks under the “water” and the greatness
of the Great Sea – Understanding.
Descending from Kether to Binah.
45. So am I, O Adonai, my lord, and such are the waters of Thine intolerable
Essence.
Gimel – Adept is on the path of the camel – he is identical to that “woman”; waters of
Thine intolerable Essence are the influences from Kether.

46. So am I, O Adonai, my beloved, and Thou hast burst me utterly in sunder.

He is the open Gate – the passage (Daleth), spread between Binah and Chokmah.

47. I am shed out like spilt blood upon the mountains; the Ravens of
Dispersion have borne me utterly away.
Stellar life is poured upon the elevation of the soul's improvement; the descent of
consciousness from Chokmah to Tiphareth is perceived as a collapse of the force of the
Abyss.

48. Therefore is the seal unloosed, that guarded the Eighth abyss; therefore
is the vast sea as a veil; therefore is there a rending asunder of all things.
Vau – Hierophant – Hoor as the Lord who Initiates. The might of Stellar Gnosis
penetrates through the veil-sea.

49. Yea, also verily Thou art the cool still water of the wizard fount. I have
bathed in Thee, and lost me in Thy stillness.
Zain, the Lovers.

50. That which went in as a brave boy of beautiful limbs cometh forth as a
maiden, as a little child for perfection.
Chariot on the path of Cheth. Activity is transferred into passivity; a little child is the
Spirit which represents the union of polarity.

51. O Thou light and delight, ravish me away into the milky ocean of the
stars!
Teth – Snake – Adept summons Understanding of Adonai in the form of Babalon.

52. O Thou Son of a light-transcending mother, blessed be Thy name, and the
Name of Thy Name, throughout the ages!
Vau + He – overwhelming the light because the Hermit is Yod of the Spirit, “blessed” by
the Name of the Father, by the Logos of Æon.

53. Behold! I am a butterfly at the Source of Creation; let me die before the
hour, falling dead into Thine infinite stream!
Transformation and Transfiguration: the butterfly is first caterpillar (the Man of Earth)
 then resides in the capsule (the Lover) and finally transforms into the free Being of the
Spirit (the Hermit).

54. Also the stream of the stars floweth ever majestical unto the Abode; bear
me away upon the Bosom of Nuit!
Lamed – Maat, Goddess of Abode behind the "life," she is the Truth of the Light, the
Harmony of the Stars.
Each center is the center only in relation to the self-periphery.

55. This is the world of the waters of Maim; this is the bitter water that
becometh sweet. Thou art beautiful and bitter, O golden one, O my Lord
Adonai, O thou Abyss of Sapphire!
Maim/Water; Adonai describes himself in the sphere of Water.

56. I follow Thee, and the waters of Death fight strenuously against me. I
pass unto the Waters beyond Death and beyond Life.
Nun – Death; the continuum of impressions in the line of incarnations prevents Adept
from experiencing the connection and pervade with Adonai, remembering the unity with
him during all “life” in the Kingdom. Unity with Adonai is Understanding which is
reached through the 50 “gates”, and it is beyond Life and Death.
56 – NU.

57. How shall I answer the foolish man? In no way shall he come to the
Identity of Thee!
Samekh – the one who not aimed himself toward Adonai is foolish and cannot reach the
consolation with that Unity, which is sameness of Adept and Adonai.

58. But I am the Fool that heedeth not the Play of the Magician. Me doth the
Woman of the Mysteries instruct in vain; I have burst the bonds of Love and
of Power and of Worship.
Devil identifies himself with the Fool – the Aleph of the Spirit (which is opposite to
Magus enchantment by words). Understanding cannot be maintained if Adept is covered
by Water; he must renounce from restrictions that occur through Love, Power, and
Worship – all the qualities that presuppose duality and the cohesion of polarity.

59. Therefore is the Eagle made one with the Man, and the gallows of infamy
dance with the fruit of the just.
Water (Netzach – Woman – Feelings) merges with the Air (Hod – Man – Intelligence) –
the Tower falls; restrictions established in the Ego collapses by unifying the polarity that
emanates the Truth and Justice.

60. I have descended, O my darling, into the black shining waters, and I have
plucked Thee forth as a black pearl of infinite preciousness.
The Emperor – Tzaddi; Adept continues to search through his feelings and “finds”
 Adonai as a black pearl, the pearl of the beauty of feelings; the waters are Nuit, and the
pearl is Hadit. Adept is Ra-Hoor-Khuit.
61. I have gone down, O my God, into the abyss of the all, and I have found
Thee in the midst under the guise of No Thing.
Qoph – the dark abyss of the unconscious – hidden in this is the point of the center which
is Nothing, as the endless circle around Abyss is Nothing.

62. But as Thou art the Last, Thou art also the Next, and as the Next do I
reveal Thee to the multitude.
He is the Sun, one solar phase of the incarnation of Æon ends, while “new” Æon enters
the “scene” of action which is declared to the multitude through Adept-Prophet.
The Sun is always the Lord of the world – its divine influences on the Earth are changed
through personal evolution and communion with the Gods of the Cosmos: the Source and
the Centre of All – Hadith, and the Endless Space of the Universe – Nuit.

63. They that ever desired Thee shall obtain Thee, even at the End of their
Desire.
Shin – the Spirit – is the most potent guiding Force and the reflection of Fire that arouses
Adept longing to the highest achievement of “unity” – understanding and remembering
the Oneness with God.

64. Glorious, glorious, glorious art Thou, O my lover supernal, O Self of

myself.
Tau; + + + The Blessing of the Priest of the Stars, He and Adonai are One.

65. For I have found Thee alike in the Me and the Thee; there is no
difference, O my beautiful, my desirable One! In the One and the Many have
I found Thee; yea, I have found Thee.
I spent eternity in Heaven, not moving an inch from the Earth. That is because I am the
Sea, and the Heaven is reflecting in me for all endlessness. Adept is “only” the reflection
of Adonai.
There is Understanding (spiritual waters) which explains that Adept is united with its
substance with Adonai; He sees him both inside and outside of himself; even more, there
is no difference between the “outside” and “inside.” They are Lovers, who are not
separated in their ecstasy, but are One – as in the multitude, Adept sees Adonai in all
things. He confirms and puts a seal on the revelation of the Unity of Man and God. Deus
Est Homo.

CHAPTER IV
1. O crystal heart! I the Serpent clasp Thee; I drive home mine head into the
central core of Thee, O God my beloved.
Lord, my beloved! Thou depth of my heart, who is in me, as much as I am in the heart of
yours. The balanced Sphinx arouses the Knowledge and Conversation of the Holy
Guardian Angel.
Kether – now in the sphere of Fire, Adonai “addresses” to the Adept, defining Himself as
 the Serpent (32 paths of the Tree of Life, Teth – the Lust and Kundalini, NehuShTaN);
the crystal heart is the carrier of Hadit, wrapped Serpent is the appearance of Nuit; its
head (of Dragon – Cauda Draconis) is the “knot” which is the relation of the Circle and
Point; Adonai declares the Divine nature which is from Adept.

2. Even as on the resounding wind-swept heights of Mitylene some god-like

woman casts aside the lyre, and with her locks aflame as an aureole, plunges
into the wet heart of the creation, so I, O Lord my God!
Chokmah; the Angel now portrays to Adept a new “fiery” series of Visions, which
describe their “connection” and inseparability. Adonai is not “inside” or “beyond” Adept,
nor is the Adept just the “bearer” of the Spirit of Adonai, but they are the same “being”
which emanates on different levels of “existence.”

3. There is a beauty unspeakable in this heart of corruption, where the

flowers are aflame.
Binah; for Understanding, the beauty of the heart does not exist as a “reality,” for
Understanding the heart of Adept is “rotten” by egoism. However, the energy expression
of Pra-Nu as “chakras” or flaming flowers, conveys the energy of Adept's consciousness
with the flow towards Understanding.

4. Ah me! but the thirst of Thy joy parches up this throat, so that I cannot
sing.
“Wailing” over the “fate” of everything that appears “below” Abyss. Thirst, throat-
parching and the impossibility of singing are shown as a triple “deviation” of the energy
flow that is “set” above Chesed.

5. I will make me a little boat of my tongue, and explore the unknown rivers.
It may be that the everlasting salt may turn to sweetness, and that my life may
be no longer athirst.
Components of the mind process. The little boat is the consciousness; the tongue is
Logos; unknown rivers are fluctuating thoughts.
Now, Adonai mentions allegories of the carrier of His Soul – pointing out that Adept, as
his emanation in the Kingdom, explored and gained experience and insights through
unknown regions of consciousnesses; the fire of Geburah can “transform” salt into
sweetness, His soul will acquire enough knowledge and personal realization that, through
hard effort, he will accomplish the Great Satisfaction and fulfillment of the Great Work.

6. O ye that drink of the brine of your desire, ye are nigh to madness! Your
torture increaseth as ye drink, yet still ye drink. Come up through the creeks
to the fresh water; I shall be waiting for you with my kisses.
The brine of your desire is misunderstanding the purpose of life and the ignorance of the
True Nature of Man; still, Man/Adept perseveres in the Work, wearing the Cross in order
to “awaken” the Rose, the real Beauty of the Soul. The Adept must persevere through all
the distresses, through all temptations, realizing that Adonai is the freshwater of His Soul
– still in a loving relationship with one another.
7. As the bezoar-stone that is found in the belly of the cow, so is my lover
among lovers.
Bezoar-stone – the elixir of Suvasini, in the belly of the cow – Hathoor – HetHeru, the
house of Hoor – Netzach. Practicus and Philosophus.
Netzach; the cow's belly survives everything that the “cow” has eaten there is an
inspiration from Adonai that purifies life experiences – giving them meaning, that they
serve the “ultimate” goal of the Spiritual Illumination – the realization of oneness
between God and Man.

8. O honey boy! Bring me Thy cool limbs hither! Let us sit awhile in the
orchard, until the sun go down! Let us feast on the cool grass! Bring wine, ye
slaves, that the cheeks of my boy may flush red.
Hod; intelligence is warmed by the fire of the Sun, now rejoicing, possess the habits as
servants, and wine is the force that gives the Adept empowerment of the Soul. Honey –
embodied by royal “bees”; cool limbs represent the pure machinery and logic of the
Reason.

9. In the garden of immortal kisses, O thou brilliant One, shine forth! Make
Thy mouth an opium-poppy, that one kiss is the key to the infinite sleep and
lucid, the sleep of Shi-loh-am.
ShLM as ‫– שלמ‬ ♎ . A suitable Method of attaining the Conversation[98].
The Sleep of Shiloham.
Yesod is the garden of immortal kisses as the root “chakra” from which the Snake rises –
which is shining, and shines for love kisses – the exchange of energies between the Adept
and Adonai. The attainment of Adeptship gives a dream about peace to a man; the mouth
represents the “path” that is covered over the Foundation, which also represents the
dreams and clairvoyance. Shiloham is a state of peace, and awoken passive
consciousness, even during sleep.

10. In my sleep I beheld the Universe like a clear crystal without one speck.
Malkuth – the Universe – a clear crystal without a speck; Adonai, in His Divinity, does
not see the Universe as a form of abomination and obscure nonsense; for him, the World
is vivid and understandable, without a speck – there is no ignorance and
misunderstanding of the nature of the Universe.

11. There are purse-proud penniless ones that stand at the door of the tavern
and prate of their feats of wine-bibbing.
Aleph – the Fool – purse-proud as a deviation of the ego-consciousness under the
influence of Fire – the mind prates, imagines and fantasizes about learned experiences
and their meaning.

12. There are purse-proud penniless ones that stand at the door of the tavern
and revile the guests.
 Beth; the Mind, ignoring the content of the Soul, has no “positive” relation to the process
that gives to the Adept lessons about the elements that he conceives.

13. The guests dally upon couches of mother-of-pearl in the garden; the noise
of the foolish men is hidden from them.
Gimel; Adonai is now showing in this way – the inner light of the moon is calm as the
soul passes through the experience of Fire; there is a duality of guests and foolish man
who have a special “relationship” with the third factor of “poor people,” so Adonai points
to the Adept that certain events cannot be accepted as useful in the processes of Fire.
Dallying is the element of the Earth, but also the dormancy of mind and intelligence; the
noise is the vibration of the Air which originates from the Water – foolish men.

14. Only the inn-keeper feareth lest the favour of the king be withdrawn from
him.
The inn-keeper is a reflection of the Magister, and the favor of the king is a “gate” that
allows the flow of the Wisdom, which inn-keeper pours to the lower parts of Being.

15. Thus spake the Magister V.V.V.V.V. unto Adonai his God, as they played
together in the starlight over against the deep black pool that is in the Holy
Place of the Holy House beneath the Altar of the Holiest One.
He; the starlight; the Magister is 8 = 3 in Binah, while Adonai is the Father of Wisdom,
like 9 = 2 in Chokmah; yet they are embodied in the One who resides in Tiphareth, under
the light of the Star; deep black pool is Binah; Holy Place is Chokmah; and the Holiest
One is Kether, 10 = 1.

16. But Adonai laughed, and played more languidly.

Vau; he is the Hierophant and the Initiator – he steers Life playing the game of
incarnation.

17. Then the scribe took note, and was glad. But Adonai had no fear of the
Magician and his play. For it was Adonai who had taught all his tricks to the
Magician.
The scribe is merely a manifestator of the Gnosis of this understanding and Realization of
unified nature and spiritual relationship of Adonai and Magician; on the path of Zain,
they are Brothers – Adonai, in the mind of the Magician, imprinted all possible thoughts
that might be thought ever, and that may be silenced. Adonai created the Mind and the
soul of the Mage/Adept.

18. And the Magister entered into the play of the Magician. When the
Magician laughed he laughed; all as a man should do.
Cheth; a Master of the Temple uses the Magician – his lower self (and body) for the
manifestation of his Understanding.
19. And Adonai said: Thou art enmeshed in the web of the Magician. This He
said subtly, to try him.
There seems to be a “trap” that Magister can drift in the intentions he expresses through
the Magician and to be bound by his lower personality, conditioned by material and astral
needs – though it is impossible since the Magister has no Ego that would be restrained
and limited to his Nephesh.
Teth – tempting him as a Serpent.

20. But the Magister gave the sign of the Magistry, and laughed back on
Him: O Lord, O beloved, did these fingers relax on Thy curls, or these eyes
turn away from Thine eye?
One cannot “become” Magister until certain spiritual cognition has not been reached –
therefore, it is a measure of the Magister's nature, he cannot be limited by the body or
soul in which his non-self resides. He will not let go from the “connection” with Adonai,
neither through actions (fingers on curls) nor thoughts (directed on the eye).
Yod – the Hermit of Thelema.

21. And Adonai delighted in him exceedingly.

Kaph – the joy of “Happiness” – the mystery of the spinning Wheel of the Universe; the
machinery of the Cosmos.
Adonai delighted in him – Adonai is in Everything.

22. Yea, O my master, thou art the beloved of the Beloved One; the Bennu
Bird is set up in Phila not in vain.
Lamed/Adonai is the Truth, expressed from Nuit; Bennu Bird is Phoenix, who stands in
balance on the island of Power, which is a manifestation of Hathor in the course of
Life.

23. I who was the priestess of Ahathoor rejoice in your love. Arise, O Nile-
God, and devour the holy place of the Cow of Heaven! Let the milk of the
stars be drunk up by Sebek the dweller of Nile!
The Goddess, who is the Throne of Horus, “governs” over the Anima of the human soul.
Maim – the waters of Nile; Sebek, a resident of water, the subconscious force,
reintegrates the experiences of “past time” and “past manifestations” of the Spirit; Sebek
is a Fire aspect of this chapter that influences the Initiate through the force of Water, on
the path of Maim. Milk of the stars is the “milk” of the goddess Nuit – the light of
awakening from non-remembering of non-consciousness.

24. Arise, O serpent Apep, Thou art Adonai the beloved one! Thou art my
darling and my lord, and Thy poison is sweeter than the kisses of Isis the
mother of the Gods!
50 – Nun/Death.
Apep is Horus, awakened Flame Star – he is Adonai. My darling and my lord – double
relationship, passive and active; the serpent Apep is the force of the awakening of
Kundalini (a reflection of the Baphomet’s vision in flames). The power of love between
 Magister and Adonai is stronger than the beauty of the Goddess, and “maternal relation.”

25. For Thou art He! Yea, Thou shalt swallow up Asi and Asar, and the
children of Ptah. Thou shalt pour forth a flood of poison to destroy the works
of the Magician. Only the Destroyer shall devour Thee; Thou shalt blacken
his throat, wherein his spirit abideth. Ah, serpent Apep, but I love Thee!
His throat is a body of voice. Apophis will not utter “his” word of Æon. Also, Daath.
Adonai is Apep. Asi and Asar are Isis and Osiris – together they form the Trinity. IAO:
Asi + Apep + Asar; Ptah's children are the emanations of the duality of four elements –
because Apep is an active Spirit.
Samekh; he is in the balance of the rising between polarity of the God and the Goddess;
Adonai, in relationship with the Initiate, arouses personal gnosis, bringing him to the
knowledge of the “personal” Word of Æon – overcoming the power of the known
Wisdom (which reached to the Initiate in the “outer”) – direct and personal experience of
the Truth destroys all knowledge (blacken his throat) and allows the Magister to dwell in
the Fire of the awakened Spirit.

26. My God! Let Thy secret fang pierce to the marrow of the little secret bone
that I have kept against the Day of Vengeance of Hoor-Ra. Let Kheph-Ra
sound his sharded drone! let the jackals of Day and Night howl in the
wilderness of Time! let the Towers of the Universe totter, and the guardians
hasten away! For my Lord hath revealed Himself as a mighty serpent, and
my heart is the blood of His body.
70 – Ayin; the Falic force of the little secret bone (constellation of the Ursa Major)
receives the influence of the Flaming Kundalini. The Day of Vengeance of Hoor-Ra is the
Equinox of the Gods – the day when Balance occurs within the Initiate itself, and he
realizes his Truth, His True Nature, and Will. Keph-Ra is a “midnight beetle” – and here
it is noted that the effects of the awakening (Hoor-Ra) also act on unconsciousness;
Hoor-Ra awakens in Tiphareth, which rules over Hod through the path of Ayin –
Mercury's sphere of mind and intellect – who is a servant of the Sun in the regions of the
unconscious.
It further confirms that Adonai is a solar Flame of consciousness of the serpent.

27. I am like a love-sick courtesan of Corinth. I have toyed with kings and
captains, and made them my slaves. Today I am the slave of the little asp of
death; and who shall loosen our love?
Pe, The Tower; he renounced his beauty, power and “importance” for the “higher” aim
and purpose – the love for Adonai.

28. Weary, weary! saith the scribe, who shall lead me to the sight of the
Rapture of my master?
The Magician, who is the “servant” of the Magister, can be “tired” from this magnificent
Power of Love.
90 – Tzaddi – Lord Adonai gives a thrill to the soul.
29. The body is weary and the soul is sore weary and sleep weighs down their
eyelids; yet ever abides the sure consciousness of ecstasy, unknown, yet
known in that its being is certain. O Lord, be my helper, and bring me to the
bliss of the Beloved!
Body-soul-eyelids – the lower Trinity of the Magician – are “bound” by the laws and
influences of the universe in which they are incarnated; body, soul and the mind cannot
fully comprehend pervasion of consciousness with the ecstasy of the Adonai living Force.
Qoph – The Moon – Even the “dark” regions of consciousness stay manifested by the
Law that emerges from the Spirit of Æon; as the Moon reflects the Sun, so is Adonai
reflection of Nuit.

30. I came to the house of the Beloved, and the wine was like fire that flieth
with green wings through the world of waters.
House of the Beloved is Beth Elohim (ALHIM is a plural female) – also Binah, as the
City of the Pyramids.
Resh – The House of the Goddess of the Sun – Babalon.

31. I felt the red lips of nature and the black lips of perfection. Like sisters
they fondled me their little brother; they decked me out as a bride; they
mounted me for Thy bridal chamber.
Æon.
Lips of nature – Isis and Nephthys; sisters – he is a little brother – a child Hoor-Paar-
Kraat/Horus; through the Understanding of Binah, they are preparing him for a wedding
– for the Union with Adonai, and the realization that there is no difference or separation
between Magister and Adonai.

32. They fled away at Thy coming; I was alone before Thee.
Cross/Tau; he is alone before Adonai, which is shown in the vision of the Cross of Light
(“X”). All “external” disappears; in other words, withdraws its manifestations into the
consciousness of the Initiate, absorbing all existing stimulus to the integrated and one
Self. Adonai is the only embodiment of that process, which is yet much simpler and
clearer in its essence.

33. I trembled at Thy coming, O my God, for Thy messenger was more
terrible than the Death-star.
Kether (a passive aspect of peace and stillness, inaction in the Crown of Fire); He is
focused on Sahasrara, but Kriyas occasionally “erupt” as the Fire of Adonai passes
through the subtle body of the Magister. The arrival of Adonai represents complete
combustion of everything that makes the “Magician” and “Adept.”

34. On the threshold stood the fulminant figure of Evil, the Horror of
emptiness, with his ghastly eyes like poisonous wells. He stood, and the
chamber was corrupt; the air stank. He was an old and gnarled fish more
hideous than the shells of Abaddon.
The “ultimate” achievement of Union requires confrontation with the Magister's most
powerful connections with the Ego of Magician; even a few restrictions and attachments
are fulminant figures of Evil that mask the union with the Highest. What guards the
passage is Choronzon; the Ego is horrified, seeing itself as more hideous than the shells
of Abaddon – yet when it reaches Insight and the Union – then it will see that Abaddon,
as a terrible phenomenon, is actually a hidden ecstasy of Love – “Ad Babalonis Amorem
Do Dedico Omnia Nihilo”; in Union with Adonai Consciousness will conceive itself as
an Ouroboros (Star Space of the Circle of the Universe).

35. He enveloped me with his demon tentacles; yea, the eight fears took hold
upon me.
Binah – 3 – demon tentacles are 3 x 111 = 333 – which “preserves” Understanding on all
eight lower emanations through which the Ego is reflected. Each of the eight fears serves
as an aspect of the Magician's attachment to his traits – from which he must be freed for
the attainment of Enlightenment.

36. But I was anointed with the right sweet oil of the Magister; I slipped from
the embrace as a stone from the sling of a boy of the woodlands.
Oil is an act of Spiritual Commitment and pure Aspiration (which arises from honest
striving to the Truth).
What is Oil towards Gold is like Magician towards Adonai.
Stone of Wisdom – Enlightened Magister, is not bound to Pan (the boy of the
woodlands). The “horrors” of the Abyss do not have a real influence on the Spirit (they
only empower the emanation of “lower” personalities that are an obstacle to the real
union with Adonai).

37. I was smooth and hard as ivory; the horror gat no hold. Then at the noise
of the wind of Thy coming he was dissolved away, and the abyss of the great
void was unfolded before me.
Horror, fear as Pahad, Geburah; Ivory is a Tooth – Shin/Spirit.

38. Across the waveless sea of eternity Thou didst ride with Thy captains and
Thy hosts; with Thy chariots and horsemen and spearmen didst Thou travel
through the blue.
Tiphareth; the center/Sol – travels across the waveless sea of eternity – the vastness of
Binah.
Thy captains – Chesed (Jupiter); Thy hosts – Geburah (Mars); Thy chariots – Netzach
(Venus); Thy horsemen – Hod (Mercury); Thy spearmen – Yesod (Moon). In every
Sephira Adonai had his own, particular appearance for the soul of the Master.

39. Before I saw Thee Thou wast already with me; I was smitten through by
Thy marvellous spear.
Netzach – Before I saw Thee – before gaining the Understanding – even then Adonai
influences the soul. The spear is Cosmic Phallos of active consciousness, and the Initiate
is a passive soul on which Adonai acts.

40. I was stricken as a bird by the bolt of the thunderer; I was pierced as the
thief by the Lord of the Garden.
Hod; the arrow of the thunderer Perun – strikes him “from above” – from Geburah; thief
– Mercury, the mind has its field of action – the Garden with its domains and its range as
far as it “reaches,” yet Adonai is far more powerful than the mind and intelligence, he is
the true Lord of the Garden (of the soul), the Magister is only the “gardener.” Adonai
influences (by the spear, by force of the Phallos) the Initiate.

41. O my Lord, let us sail upon the sea of blood!

He accepts the influence of Adonai and decides to manifest the Will, which is embodied
in the essence of his blood, i.e., soul. He realizes that he should “Do his will” – which is
the same Will of Adonai.

42. There is a deep taint beneath the ineffable bliss; it is the taint of
generation.
Malkuth – a visible Universe, Earth, and Kingdom are the roughest emanations of the
Stellar Goddess; Magister still “owns” the carrier of his Consciousness, the body, and
soul of the Magician (Scribe). Incarnation is still the presence in Matter; he has not
completely dissolved in the Spirit.

43. Yea, though the flower wave bright in the sunshine, the root is deep in the
darkness of earth.
Such is the nature of Man – he receives the influence of Adonai, but is still rooted in the
matter – unto death itself;
The flower here is Aleph.

44. Praise to thee, O beautiful dark earth, thou art the mother of a million
myriads of myriads of flowers.
The Spirit glorifies the elements from which the Earth was created, i.e. the material of the
Universe. The Spirit is omnipresent in the dark earth – which is the mother of many
emanations of the Spirit.

45. Also I beheld my God, and the countenance of Him was a thousandfold
brighter than the lightning. Yet in his heart I beheld the slow and dark One,
the ancient one, the devourer of His children.
Gimel – Face to face with God – Kether; the relation of the Adept in Tiphareth with the
God in Kether.
In his heart is “Chronos” – the concept of time in which continuum emanate the children
of God, i.e., manifested elements – the “lower” Gods – Sephiroth under the Abyss.
46. In the height and the abyss, O my beautiful, there is no thing, verily, there
is no thing at all, that is not altogether and perfectly fashioned for Thy
delight.
Prajnaparamita Hridaya Sutra.
4 (Daleth + Fire) – Adonai again addresses the Master, explaining, giving him an
interpretation of the potential powers contained in him – Adonai is “shaped” for the
Master's delight – and “vice versa.” Yet, Adonai speaks, and the Master listens; Adonai is
active, while Master is passive – he is still interpreting certain experiences in order to
complete the entirety of the wholeness and have the ability to Rejoice in Everything.

47. Light cleaveth unto Light, and filth to filth; with pride one contemneth
another. But not Thou, who art all, and beyond it; who art absolved from the
Division of the Shadows.
The Angel is beyond duality or division. He does not need Other to be One. The Angel
despises the path of Yoga; he is Yoga by himself. He does not seek Other One to be One;
it is enough for him to be alone with Himself. If all things will come to One thing, which
One will it be? An Aspirant will find a valuable opinion about the manifestation of the
Trigrams, as a specific aspect of the Universe's expression.
5 (He + Fire); the Master overcomes favoritism and repulsion; the distinction between
Light and filth as separate segments of Wholeness befits the Magician, who has not yet
gained the experience of realizing that all elements of “outward” are also “within” him.
The Master does not evaluate the “parts” of the manifested Universe as “good” or “bad,”
nor does he evaluate them by quality – everything that is emanated has its meaning in the
Scheme and universal cosmogony, from the slightest to the greatest, everything has its
meaning, its purpose, its will and nature to reveal.

48. O day of Eternity, let Thy wave break in foamless glory of sapphire upon
the laborious coral of our making!
6 (Vau + Fire); day of Eternity is the crossing of the Abyss along the path of Vau; this
wave is scattered from the elemental spheres to the coral – a group of celestial
constellations. The Adept is dissolving in the sphere of the Stars, arousing wisdom within
itself; the day of creation is precisely Æon of the union.

49. We have made us a ring of glistening white sand, strewn wisely in the
midst of the Delightful Ocean.
7 (Zayin + Fire); even a “symbol” of the circle is a restriction against the vastness of
Nuit.
A ring of glistening white sand represents the personality of the Master of the microcosm,
who is in the proper “relationship” with Adonai, who is the Delightful Ocean –
macrocosm.

50. Let the palms of brilliance flower upon our island; we shall eat of their
fruit, and be glad.
8 (Cheth + Fire); an island is a collection of experiences, individuals and energies that are
 “fertile ground"” for the growth of the palms, which is a symbol of progress and ripening,
whose fruits are eaten – experiences are acquired through accomplished work, actions;
High Adepts perform the Great Magical Operations serving the Forces which supports
their Will, they consume the fruits of their Great Work – every Magical operation (great
or small) has its results.

51. But for me the lustral water, the great ablution, the dissolving of the soul
in that resounding abyss.
9 (Teth + Fire); water is the purification to his Fire – as a synergy of oppositions. He
interprets Adonai both as a purifier and a resounding abyss – a pure vibration of eternal
consciousness – with which he is identified. Resounding abyss is the “music of the
sphere” of Nuit.
The first segment of the verse shows the Man of the Earth who interprets the relationship;
the second is from the Lover, who states ablution, while the third is from the Hermit,
which announces the dissolution in the resounding abyss – Nuit.

52. I have a little son like a wanton goat; my daughter is like an unfledged
eaglet; they shall get them fins, that they may swim.
10 (Yod + Fire).
Son (Vau) = the goat – Ayin; daughter (He) = the eagle – Nun: ON. Relations within the
“lower” part of Tetragrammaton are explained in a simple way, with a connection with
the Mystery of the Solar Deity.
The Master here is the “parent” above the Abyss – and the children, “ON” Anu, Oanes,
Ionna, will unite and become the “whale” that swims through the Great Sea of
Understanding.

53. That they may swim, O my beloved, swim far in the warm honey of Thy
being, O blessed one, O boy of beatitude!
20 (Kaph + Fire).
ON – the Sun, as a unified polarity of all the forces of an individual self, swims and
persists in the delight of the pleasure of living with Adonai.

54. This heart of mine is girt about with the serpent that devoureth his own
coils.
30 (Lamed + Fire); balance and harmony of the Circle with the Heart in the Center. The
Adept is the Heart; the Angel is the Serpent.

55. When shall there be an end, O my darling, O when shall the Universe and
the Lord thereof be utterly swallowed up?
40 (Maim + Fire); the Adept now awaits the end – having experienced presence and
communication with Adonai, but is not yet unified – and in that “limitation” of the
imperfect experience, with his mind he tends to comprehend the “date” and “time” of
ending the entire existence of duality. Nevertheless, now the relation between Adept and
Adonai is not the relation of Man and God, but the relation of the Universe with the
Force that “governs” it.
56. Nay! who shall devour the Infinite? who shall undo the Wrong of the
Beginning?
50 (Nun + Fire).
“Divided for love’s sake, for the chance of union,” declares Nuit in Liber CCXX.
Separation and polarity were “created” to be united in Love. But Nay! – “no” is a
negation, from the previous verses – the annulment of the solar Ego and personal
individuality. The mind and the Ruach cannot understand the “concepts” of Infinity – of
Ain Soph, the great Nun as the ocean of Endlessness – because the Man cannot
comprehend what has no boundaries – neither the beginning nor the end – and therefore
there is no wrong there, as there is no “sin of restriction” in it.
57. Thou criest like a white cat upon the roof of the Universe; there is none to
answer Thee.
60 (Samekh + Fire); his thoughts are friction of nails on the vast plateau of cosmic
consciousness; there is none – who is above the Abyss, there is no Ego, the Masters “do
not exist,” therefore there is no answer; there is no reaction to the elemental trembling of
the “lower” spheres.

58. Thou art like a lonely pillar in the midst of the sea; there is none to
behold Thee, O Thou who beholdest all!
70 (Ayin + Fire); the Devil – Phallos – pillar. Adonai explains to Adept that he is “O” as
Ayin – Phallos (the dot) and that the sea is “N” as Nun – Kteis (circle) – “ON”, only in a
different vision of the relationship; Phallos is All-PAN, and “everything” outside “him”
is Nothing, AIN.
59. Thou dost faint, thou dost fail, thou scribe; cried the desolate Voice; but I
have filled thee with a wine whose savour thou knowest not.
80 (Pe + Fire); the scribe is lost, his mind and Ego limitations are gone; the scribe is the
receiver, the “Tower” for the Voice of Adonai, who plunges into him as a lightning-spear;
the scribe is a cup, he is the “bearer” of the wine, the quality essence of the consciousness
of the Supreme Spirit.
60. It shall avail to make drunken the people of the old gray sphere that rolls
in the infinite Far-off; they shall lap the wine as dogs that lap the blood of a
beautiful courtesan pierced through by the Spear of a swift rider through the
city.
90 (Tzaddi + Fire); this was implemented through the Liber Tzaddi – the Book of the
Hermetic Hook, which “attracts” Souls of the people in for them to embark the Spiritual
Path, explaining to them that Hoor is the Lord who initiates, the Lord of Æon, their
collective “higher self” and “transpersonal consciousness”.
61. I too am the Soul of the desert; thou shalt seek me yet again in the
wilderness of sand.
The number of this verse is 61. 6 – 1, the path of High Priestess, the symbolism of
crossing the desert, the Abyss. Soul of the desert is the Babe of the Abyss. I too am is a
special form of the impact of Kether and Chokmah on the Grade of Magister Templi.
100 (Qoph + Fire); announcement of the Vision of 30 Æthyrs in Liber 418.
Since this verse does not apply only to Master Therion, it should be understood that each
Adept must go through similar experiences that are analogous to the cosmic order of the
 hierarchy of initiations. As Jehesuah had an encounter with Satan in the desert, as many
initiates walked through the wilderness in order to get isolated from earthly impressions,
so every Adept that follows the Law of Thelema has the lesson in the desert of his soul,
seeking the presence of Adonai, even through gorgeous and fantastic Visions, as well as
terrible confrontation with personal complexes and Ego defects. Desert mirages are the
reflections and images which appears from the soul of the Initiate; these are the shadows
of the hidden moon of the soul which, burned by the heat of the Sun, absorbs the Light of
Adonai.

62. At thy right hand a great lord and a comely; at thy left hand a woman
clad in gossamer and gold and having the stars in her hair. Ye shall journey
far into a land of pestilence and evil; ye shall encamp in the river of a foolish
city forgotten; there shall ye meet with Me.
200 (Resh + Fire).
Beside him are polarities, he is the Middle Pillar; he is always Erect and inspired by the
Spirit – even in the land of pestilence and evil, as well as in the river of a foolish city
forgotten – seemingly useless memories from which he is no longer bound, even in that
he recognizes the influence of Adonai.

63. There will I make Mine habitation; as for bridal will I come bedecked and
anointed; there shall the Consummation be accomplished.
300 (Shin + Fire); Adonai will prepare the circumstances and “place” where the Union
will “happen.” Whether it is a “beautiful” or “desert” environment, Adept cannot foresee
it – since Adonai is “already” perfect, he “rules” over the entire process of Initiation.
Habitation – the Man of Earth; as for bridal will I come bedecked and anointed – the
Lover; there shall the Consummation be accomplished – the Hermit.

64. O my darling, I also wait for the brilliance of the hour ineffable, when the
universe shall be like a girdle for the midst of the ray of our love, extending
beyond the permitted end of the endless One.
400 (Tau + Fire) – the Cross is the seal of light upon the realized Initiation.
Adept and Adonai are identified with Hadit and Nuit.

65. Then, O thou heart, will I the serpent eat thee wholly up; yea, I will eat
thee wholly up.
Adonai will pervade Adept and arouse him when the Light of the Spirit consumed him.
God wholly up (mouth, letter Pe) a man at the moment of liberation and the Union, thus
Man becomes the Eucharist of the Divine Mass. Man as substance turns into a Spiritual,
Divine; he dissolves thus “feeding” the God, his Adonai – with whom he is One.

CHAPTER V
1. Ah! my Lord Adonai, that dalliest with the Magister in the Treasure-House
of Pearls, let me listen to the echo of your kisses.
Adonai dallies with the Magister in Binah, “they“ are married through the path of Zain,
and right through that path Adept receives quivering of kisses of Love which he is
listening to.
Ah! is the exclamation of losing oneself at one moment of realization – it refers to the
moment of disconnection from the “environment," focusing on the polarity that unites –
in Kether.

2. Is not the starry heaven shaken as a leaf at the tremulous rapture of your
love? Am not I the flying spark of light whirled away by the great wind of
your perfection?
The starry heaven is Chokmah; this “sphere“ receives exceptional influences arising from
the love of the union of polarity (which flows from Kether) and acts upon the Stars.
The great wind of your perfection is the Power of Wisdom from Chokmah which affects
its manifested polarity – a flying spark of light.

3. Yea, cried the Holy One, and from Thy spark will I the Lord kindle a great
light; I will burn through the grey city in the old and desolate land; I will
cleanse it from its great impurity.
Adonai responds to the Aspirant, confirming the achievement and Understanding the
Mystery; the spark which is at the center of Adept's soul is developing through
Understanding, into the Great Light.
Adonai's action through the Sphere of the Stars arouses the great light which unhindered
emanates its Understanding (Binah), i.e., the grey city in the old and desolate land –
Egypt, the desert in which are the Pyramids of the Initiation; the burning light purifies the
city, i.e., the complexity of the manifested soul (Ruach), and diminishes all the dirt.

4. And thou, O prophet, shalt see these things, and thou shalt heed them not.
Chesed; he also addresses Master's “lower“ self, the prophet in him, who transmits
Wisdom and Understanding through the words of men. Even Ruach will be silenced and
purified by the Spiritual Light of the Unification of Polarity.

5. Now is the Pillar established in the Void; now is Asi fulfilled of Asar; now
is Hoor let down into the Animal Soul of Things like a fiery star that falleth
upon the darkness of the earth.
The force is balanced in the Middle Pillar – the whole Tree of Life is that Pillar – in
relation to the Void – Emptiness, or AIN.
Asi filled with Asar is Kteis filled with Phallos – this Phallos is the Tree of Life, whereas
Kteis is AIN. This Union emanates into Pentagrammaton – HOOR, a fiery star, which is
incarnated in Nephesh.
A fiery star is in Geburah.
This star is 5, the Animal Soul of Things is 6 – united they are ABRAHADABRA.
Spiritual “descends“ into the Manifested, Spiritual permeates the material.

6. Through the midnight thou art dropt, O my child, my conqueror, my

sword-girt captain, O Hoor! and they shall find thee as a black gnarl’d
glittering stone, and they shall worship thee.
Tiphareth; the element of Spirit that dominates through the verse is not yet wholly active
– therefore, the soul is at midnight hour. There is indeed a “Vision of the Sun at
Midnight“ that is a specific experience and state of consciousness.
Adonai calls Adept his child; Adonai is the Father, Adept is the Son – Vau – Tiphareth.
With the sword, he is the captain, the ruler of Air, or Ruach who arranges and holds the
Force of Sephiroth which surrounds him.
Tiphareth is, of course, Hoor – the Sun; the black glittering stone is a symbol of the
material midnight Sun.

7. My prophet shall prophesy concerning thee; around thee the maidens shall
dance, and bright babes be born unto them. Thou shalt inspire the proud ones
with infinite pride, and the humble ones with an ecstasy of abasement; all this
shall transcend the Known and the Unknown with somewhat that hath no
name. For it is as the abyss of the Arcanum that is opened in the secret Place
of Silence.
Netzach; now it is explained that the prophet, as a transmitter of the impressions of
Illumination, conveys the concept to the “lower self,“ i.e., “the scribe“ and the World
itself.
The words that come out of his pure thoughts of Understanding possess such a power to
fertilize maidens, i.e., passive contents of consciousness, giving them the meaning of
bright babes; the proud ones who are filled with the active energy of understanding will
receive the Force that will make the expansion of every positive idea of itself; humble
ones who are passive, under the influence of Illumination Force will deteriorate their
existence to abasement (humiliation); these are two descriptions of the Path of Magick
and the Path of Mysticism – Magick strives with active “methods“ to achieve
understanding of Known, while Mysticism, as Yoga, silences the self toward Unknown;
paradoxically, abyss of the Arcanum as Knowledge is connected to the secret Place of
Silence. It is precisely the secret place that is known to be a certain barrier or “transition“
of force from Spiritual sphere to materiality.

8. Thou hast come hither, O my prophet, through grave paths. Thou hast
eaten of the dung of the Abominable Ones; thou hast prostrated thyself before
the Goat and the Crocodile; the evil men have made thee a plaything; thou
hast wandered as a painted harlot, ravishing with sweet scent and Chinese
colouring, in the streets; thou hast darkened thine eyepits with Kohl; thou
hast tinted thy lips with vermilion; thou hast plastered thy cheeks with ivory
enamels. Thou hast played the wanton in every gate and by-way of the great
city. The men of the city have lusted after thee to abuse thee and to beat thee.
They have mouthed the golden spangles of fine dust wherewith thou didst
bedeck thine hair; they have scourged the painted flesh of thee with their
whips; thou hast suffered unspeakable things.
 Hod; Adept's mind receives the impression of the Spiritual Force; the grave paths
brought the prophet from Kether to Hod; he has contemplated by his mind all of the
intellectual Qliphoth that restrains the Ruach. The Dung of the Abominable Ones is the
filth from corrupted Chesed; Goat and Crocodile are Ayin and Nun – “ON“ – Animal
compulsions of Geburah. The evil people are the deviation of Tiphareth; the painted
harlot is the distortion of Netzach; he is a plaything in the sphere of Hod, playing on
every gate and byway – the Great City is the Tree of Life, and the gates and byways are
paths which connect the Sephiroth. Lust is the distortion of Yesod's passion, while
mockery and scouring are low human egoistic aberrations and the constraints of the
material Ego, which throws the soul to Malkuth – where it suffers unspeakably.

9. But I have burnt within thee as a pure flame without oil. In the midnight I
was brighter than the moon; in the daytime I exceeded utterly the sun; in the
byways of thy being I flamed, and dispelled the illusion.
The Angel exceeds all. But he is neither inside nor outside, the moon and the sun are just
mere symbols. He is out of any division; he is a pure flame without oil – the Will which
does not seek the reason for being.
Yesod + Spirit/midnight, the moon; pure flame without oil is Asamprajnata Samadhi –
Illumination “without support.“ Adonai is the Light that transcends any brightness known
to the mind and the soul of the Initiate.
These are the four “sides of the world“ – the East is a pure flame; the North – midnight,
brighter than the moon; daytime is the noon, the South and the force of the sun; the West
represents byways of thy being.

10. Therefore thou art wholly pure before Me; therefore thou art My virgin
unto eternity.
Adonai indicates that the Magister, even in his most material form, is pure before him.
He is a virgin – final He in Tetragrammaton, Malkuth.

11. Therefore I love thee with surpassing love; therefore they that despise
thee shall adore thee.
Aleph; unconditional Love. The Magister is so immensely “above“ people that those who
do not understand him convey admiration and obey the internal constraint of the Light.

12. Thou shalt be lovely and pitiful toward them; thou shalt heal them of the
unutterable evil.
Beth; Magus heals the world with his wisdom – acting by the Word of the Æon. Evil in
this context is restriction and slavery towards an imposed law which conditions the
personality and identity of a man beyond the actual nature. Realizing the truth of the
personal law of the Æon, the Initiate is cured of this evil – radiating his own Light.

13. They shall change in their destruction, even as two dark stars that crash
together in the abyss, and blaze up in an infinite burning.
Gimel; destruction is also the union of polarity and the abolition of the Ego, and
dissolution of consciousness in the Light of Adonai. Adonai is the Star, and Adept is the
Star, they unite at the “level“ of the Abyss becoming One – blazing up in an endless
flame. Unity brings consciousness into Ain Soph Aur.
14. All this while did Adonai pierce my being with his sword that hath four
blades; the blade of the thunderbolt, the blade of the Pylon, the blade of the
serpent, the blade of the Phallus.
‫ א‬.‫ אדנ י‬as , as a thunderbolt. ‫ ד‬as Door, as Pylon. ‫ נ‬as ♏ as a serpent. ‫ י‬as
Phallus. His Action is a Mystery of the Mysteries. His Work is the Collegium of the
Mystery. The A ∴ A ∴ .

Daleth; 4 – four blades – 4 elements impregnated by the Spirit; Pylon – /Malkuth;

Phallus – /Yesod; serpent – /Tiphareth; thunderbolt – /Daath. Adonai is the
Spirit who “holds“ the Sword with these four blades. Each blade represents the
penetration of the Spirit into a particular Sphere/Element.
The sword is Zain – connects 8 = 3 with 5 = 6.

15. Also he taught me the holy unutterable word Ararita, so that I melted the
sixfold gold into a single invisible point, whereof naught may be spoken.
He; Adonai revealed to Adept the meaning of the Magical formula of a Hexagram –
which is a symbol of the union of Active and Passive, Heaven and Earth, the union of the
Adept and Adonai.
He is a Star; Star is also a Sun, Hexagram is gold.

16. For the Magistry of this Opus is a secret magistry; and the sign of the
master thereof is a certain ring of lapis-lazuli with the name of my master,
who am I, and the Eye in the Midst thereof.
Vau; Understanding and Wisdom emanating from Logos, and Adonai to the Magister,
this process cannot be adequately presented to the “lower“ self – the soul of Ruach which
uses mediation for concepts and ideas.
The sign of the master is a ring, which is then a sign of the “wedding“ between Master
and Adonai. Eye in the center is Adonai, while V.V.V.V.V. are the letters of the Master's
Name.

17. Also He spake and said: This is a secret sign, and thou shalt not disclose
it unto the profane, nor unto the neophyte, nor unto the zelator, nor unto the
practicus, nor unto the philosophus, nor unto the lesser adept, nor unto the
greater adept.
Zain; the meaning of Mastership and the nature of this achievement cannot be explained
in the “lower“ Grades of the A ∴ A ∴ . Each Grade has its perceptions and its “way“ of
understanding and “communicating“ with Adonai – but the Love of union with Adonai
cannot be “pronounced“ or “revealed“ because it is an experience analogous to that
achievement – all spoken words are meaningless compared to that secret sign.

18. But unto the exempt adept thou shalt disclose thyself if thou have need of
him for the lesser operations of thine art.
Cheth; a Master of the Temple conveys the lessons and “interpretation“ of Æon's Gnosis
only to “himself,“ as “he“ is manifested on the level of Chesed. Therefore, he is like a
charioteer who runs on water carrying the Grail of Understanding, but still being
manifested, in the “armor“ of his manifestation “below“ the Abyss. Master of the Temple
needs an Adeptus Exemptus so that Understanding can permeate the “lower“ parts of
Being. Otherwise there would be no real integration of spiritual attainment – if the Force
did not flow from that attainment, being “selfishly“ reserved only for the Master (which
is almost impossible), then it would be distorted; therefore, the Master transmits
“instructions“ from Understanding to the Exempt Adept who is able to conceive the
manifestation of that Spirit, which is nothing else than himself.
19. Accept the worship of the foolish people, whom thou hatest. The Fire is
not defiled by the altars of the Ghebers, nor is the Moon contaminated by the
incense of them that adore the Queen of Night.
Teth; passion and worship come from a lower level – Ego and Ruach are trying
(foolishly) to approach and consent to their personal surmise of Mastership, imagining
what “it could be.“ The real attainment of the Spiritual experience is not the same as
interpretation or intellectual understanding of what Illumination represents and what is its
meaning. Fire is not the word which describes the Fire; Fire can only be perceived
through feeling the Fire and Being the Fire. Moon as Luna is not just a description of a
goddess, but her presence and unification with her, as a direct experience. The mind can
understand the structure of the Universe, but the Ego is not yet realized in it.

20. Thou shalt dwell among the people as a precious diamond among cloudy
diamonds, and crystals, and pieces of glass. Only the eye of the just merchant
shall behold thee, and plunging in his hand shall single thee out and glorify
thee before men.
Yod – the Hand; he moves hidden among people, like the Hermit; he is Perfect, yet
hidden – because the lower segments of the being cannot clearly understand the Reality
of the Spirit. The eye of the just merchant is the sincerity of the Initiate and unconditioned
commitment to the Spiritual.

21. But thou shalt heed none of this. Thou shalt be ever the heart, and I the
serpent will coil close about thee. My coil shall never relax throughout the
aons. Neither change nor sorrow nor unsubstantiality shall have thee; for
thou art passed beyond all these.
Kaph; it is a Grand Fortune! Change, sorrow, unsubstantiality – three aspects spinning on
the Wheel; the axis of the Wheel is the heart, while the rim is the serpent.
The only thing that matters is the grip of a snake around the heart. Everything else is
irrelevant. Because what would be that “rest“? Even that is part of the grip.

22. Even as the diamond shall glow red for the rose, and green for the rose-
leaf; so shalt thou abide apart from the Impressions.
Lamed; apart from the Impressions – deliberation through impartiality – blind justice –
Equilibrium of goddess Maat.
23. I am thou, and the Pillar is ’stablished in the void.
Maim; he is the Messiah; Two are One – Adonai and Adept are One; the Pillar is the
Tree of Life, the void is AIN – “they“ are United.

24. Also thou art beyond the stabilities of Being and of Consciousness and of
Bliss; for I am thou, and the Pillar is ’stablished in the void.
Nun; continuum through Æons “overcomes“ Yesod, Hod and Netzach; I am thou –
Tiphareth; Samekh is appointed in the Sphere. Samekh is a ritual of the Union.
25. Also thou shalt discourse of these things unto the man that writeth them,
and he shall partake of them as a sacrament; for I who am thou am he, and
the Pillar is ’stablished in the void.
Samekh; the Gnosis is transmitted from Master to Adept, from Adept to Magician – who
understands all this as a divine blessing. The indication that Samekh meant the
unification of polarity – it could not stand upright to be disturbed by some force, nor to
lack firm foundation, nor that the Pillar itself is not mighty in its standing.

26. From the Crown to the Abyss, so goeth it single and erect. Also the
limitless sphere shall glow with the brilliance thereof.
Ayin – the All-Seeing Eye of the Crown; Ayin – raised Phallos – pillar; the limitless
sphere is Ain Soph, glow with the brilliance is Ain Soph Aur; the pillar permeates
everything and transmits the concept of the union to all parts of the Being.
27. Thou shalt rejoice in the pools of adorable water; thou shalt bedeck thy
damsels with pearls of fecundity; thou shalt light flame like licking tongues of
liquor of the Gods between the pools.
Pe – flame – the highest aspect of this verse in the expressed threefold of soul's
inspiration; he transmits Gnosis to himself and interprets it on every plane – to integrate
experience in all possible worlds; he initiates Spiritual Fire among man.

28. Also thou shalt convert the all-sweeping air into the winds of pale water,
thou shalt transmute the earth into a blue abyss of wine.
Tzaddi; transfusion of the elements – conveying the Force from one plane to another –
permeating the Illuminating Self with all parts of the soul. The ability of consciousness,
after the realization of Enlightenment, to act smoothly and unconditionally from any
plane that it chooses to be suitable for the transmission of Gnosis and Consecration of
Æon.

29. Ruddy are the gleams of ruby and gold that sparkle therein; one drop
shall intoxicate the Lord of the Gods my servant.
Qoph; the Lord of the Gods is Adonai Elohim/Jehovah Elohim; single and only one idea
of the Gnosis of Æon's Logos has the Power to act on the Ruler of the manifested
Universe, because this drop is the Point, Hadit, the hidden potency of Spirit (as well as
“homeopathic“ acting through “potency“ by which the hidden effect is obtained from an
immeasurable “unconscious“, through water as the “medium“ and the transmitter of
Spirit’s act).
30. Also Adonai spake unto V.V.V.V.V. saying: O my little one, my tender
one, my little amorous one, my gazelle, my beautiful, my boy, let us fill up the
pillar of the Infinite with an infinite kiss!
Resh; six aspects of the Master which are explained by their analogy with the Sephiroth;
the Master's soul is sixfold manifested: the little one – Yesod, the tender one – Hod, the
amorous one – Netzach, the gazelle – Tiphareth, the beautiful one – Geburah, the boy –
Chesed. The pillar of the Infinite is Samekh + Ain Soph – a manifestation that fulfills the
infinite – the true meaning of this is the unification of Polarity of God and Man, that
union is an infinite kiss.

31. So that the stable was shaken and the unstable became still.
Shin; Æon – “the Terrible Judgment.“ Change and stability; matter and energy (motion).
Nuit + Hadit.

32. They that beheld it cried with a formidable affright: The end of things is
come upon us.
Tau; the Cross is the seal of the end of things – the final manifestation and the end of the
visible Universe.

33. And it was even so.

Kether; positive “confirmation,“ final point on manifestation (From Spirit to Matter).

34. Also I was in the spirit vision and beheld a parricidal pomp of atheists,
coupled by two and by two in the supernal ecstasy of the stars. They did
laugh and rejoice exceedingly, being clad in purple robes and drunken with
purple wine, and their whole soul was one purple flower-flame of holiness.
Chokmah; everything in the verse is related to the meaning of number 2 and Chokmah.
Parricidal – the multitude disguises the One – “father“; coupled by two and by two –
pairs of opposites – united “2 = 1“ and manifested (and it was even so – as in the verse
33) – they flow from Kether; supernal ecstasy of the stars – fixed stars of Chokmah;
consciousness is in such a state that it expresses experiences through specific images and
impressions that are appropriate to the mind for understanding – i.e. how it would be
possible at all at this plane (the way the scribe writes, and the followers reads) to convey
this Gnosis of Æon. Purple flower-flame of holiness is the Ajna Chakra.

35. They beheld not God; they beheld not the Image of God; therefore were
they arisen to the Palace of the Splendour Ineffable. A sharp sword smote out
before them, and the worm Hope writhed in its death-agony under their feet.
Binah; God is not seen in Binah; there is no image of God in Understanding because in
this place Master is “not“; the Ego does not exist in Binah and cannot “see“ from what it
is “separated." The Magister is unified with Adonai and therefore “he“ alone “does not
exist.“
The realization of Understanding nullifies the unreality and absurdity of Hope as a state
of the soul.

36. Even as their rapture shore asunder the visible Hope, so also the Fear
Invisible fled away and was no more.
Chesed; Hope is the passive trait of the path of He (the Star); rapture shore is a habitat on
the other side of the river of life – Understanding against the Knowledge of Chesed;
Hope implies that there is a certain anxiety about why the Ego assumes to “overcome“
the source of Fear. The Ego (and its Ruach) is the generator of uncertainty and fear.
Therefore, direct Experience of Truth eliminates Master's hope, in other words giving
him certainty in cognition and belief in experience.

37. O ye that are beyond Aormuzdi and Ahrimanes! blessed are ye unto the
ages.
Geburah; two divine powers of polarity that are vigorously opposed to one another. From
them deviates the concept of “good God“ and “evil Devil,“ as it was presented in the past
centuries in the teachings of the world's religions. From them comes the “fear“ – Pahad,
from Geburah. However, these opposite forces are polarities that seek to unite, and
Adonai refers that “his“ relation with the Master is eminent, equally through that polarity
of the divine vision of the “conflict.“ The struggle stems from Love.

38. They shaped Doubt as a sickle, and reaped the flowers of Faith for their
garlands.
Tiphareth; self-analysis, introspection, self-reconsideration represents doubt on the lower
level, when the soul is on the path of self-awareness; sickle is the blade of truth that, in
time, “cuts“, i.e., acquires experiences in the religious sense of the relationship between
God and Man, in their continuous movement (the garlands of experiences) and
interaction.

39. They shaped Ecstasy as a spear, and pierced the ancient dragon that sat
upon the stagnant water.
Netzach; Ecstasy as a spear is Ayin, and the ancient dragon is Nun – this is a new
revelation of the Name “ON.“ ON is often shown to the Initiate at different levels and in
different “forms,“ which leads him to various interpretations and perceptions of the
Mystery of the Sun.
Ecstasy as a spear is the rise of Kundalini – an active aspect of awakening the Pra-Nu; the
ancient dragon is a passive aspect of stillness of Pra-Nu; the stagnant water is
unconscious, unknown, the Nephesh.
The ancient dragon is the image of the Serpent which is Adonai, while ecstasy as a spear
is Adept's spiritual aspiration.

40. Then the fresh springs were unloosed, that the folk athirst might be at
ease.
Hod; with the illumination of union between Adonai and Adept, new sources for the flow
of the Gnosis of Æon are created. That transmits the Knowledge and Understanding of
specific aspects and the meaning of the “existence“ of the Universe so that the Multitude
of Man can be moved and inspired, feeling the Call towards Spiritual.

41. And again I was caught up into the presence of my Lord Adonai, and the
knowledge and Conversation of the Holy One, the Angel that Guardeth me.
 Yesod; this is the fundament of the lecture about what is the aim of all external Work and
research in the “Golden Dawn“, i.e., what the Man of the Earth as Thelemite has to
achieve – Adept here announces his Experience – the Knowledge and Conversation –
Consolidation and Continuum of Consciousness in the inseparability of Adonai and the
Adeptus.

42. O Holy Exalted One, O Self beyond self, O Self-Luminous Image of the
Unimaginable Naught, O my darling, my beautiful, come Thou forth and
follow me.
Malkuth; Adonai is – the Exalted One – the Holy – the Self beyond self. Kether is in
Malkuth, only such words that do not speak about the manifested and real “vision“ but
which define epithets above human limitations, convey the indication of “what“Adonai
is, i.e., “The Holy Guardian Angel“ – he is a Self-Luminous Image of Nuit. Adept and
Adonai are connected by Love.

43. Adonai, divine Adonai, let Adonai initiate refulgent dalliance! Thus I
concealed the name of Her name that inspireth my rapture, the scent of
whose body bewildereth the soul, the light of whose soul abaseth this body
unto the beasts.
Aleph; the incarnation of the Goddess in the body of a mortal Woman commenced the
Initiation of the Master.
Ada – Father, Lai – Mother, RD – the Gate of the Sun.
The threefold act of inspiration: the name is the driving “formula“ of the initiation of the
Man of the Earth; the scent of love is the subtlety of the Lover; the light of the Hermit’s
soul “tames“ the beast in him.

44. I have sucked out the blood with my lips; I have drained Her beauty of its
sustenance; I have abased Her before me, I have mastered Her, I have
possessed Her, and Her life is within me. In Her blood I inscribe the secret
riddles of the Sphinx of the Gods, that none shall understand,— save only the
pure and voluptuous, the chaste and obscene, the androgyne and the
gynander that have passed beyond the bars of the prison that the old Slime of
Khem set up in the Gates of Amennti.
Beth; 44 – DM – blood. Elemental emanations from the action of Magical force.
Pure and voluptuous – Man of the Earth; polarity of animal passions.
Chaste and obscene – Lover; the polarity of love passions between Adonai and Adept.
The androgyne and the gynander – Hermit; the polarity of the realization of the
“identity“ of the Master of the Temple.

45. O my adorable, my delicious one, all night will I pour out the libation on
Thine altars; all night will I burn the sacrifice of blood; all night will I swing
the thurible of my delight before Thee, and the fervour of the orisons shall
intoxicate Thy nostrils.
 Gimel; the Adept is „addressing” to God in Kether from the beauty of Tiphareth, the
night is from Moon, for he, even in the night and passivity of the Soul seeks for Adonai;
aspiration and dedication only to the Highest can represent the “method“ of coming to
Him.

46. O Thou who camest from the land of the Elephant, girt about with the
tiger’s pell, and garlanded with the lotus of the spirit, do Thou inebriate my
life with Thy madness, that She leap at my passing.
Daleth; she leaps through her “gate“ while the Master passes because the Ego is
destroyed, and he is in the ecstasy of the union with “her.”
Elephant – Krishna; he opens the Roads, opens the Gateway (Daleth); girt with the
tiger’s pell is the association of Strength that has surmounted the raw, animal power;
garlanded with the lotus of the spirit – Crown of Light – a lotus flower as a
representation of the Nuit energies – wrapped around the “skull”, at the level of the path
of Daleth.
47. Bid Thy maidens who follow Thee bestrew us a bed of flowers immortal,
that we may take our pleasure thereupon. Bid Thy satyrs heap thorns among
the flowers, that we may take our pain thereupon. Let the pleasure and pain
be mingled in one supreme offering unto the Lord Adonai!
He; he invokes all the might of His Being to engage and support the experience of the
union of Adept and Adonai.
Maidens – the Man of the Earth;
Satyrs – the Lover;
A supreme offering unto the Lord – the Hermit of Thelema.

48. Also I heard the voice of Adonai the Lord the desirable one concerning
that which is beyond.
Vau; Logos from Chokmah appears as a voice to Adept in Chesed.

49. Let not the dwellers in Thebai and the temples thereof prate ever of the
Pillars of Hercules and the Ocean of the West. Is not the Nile a beautiful
water?
First, explore what is close to you and then go further. Graduality is the condition of
every progress, which is the climbing upon the Mountain of Abiegnus. That is a defined
relationship to our Way ∴ . The Pillars of Hercules and the Western Ocean, are they not
the waters of the Great Ocean of Binah? What would they prate about then?
The path of Zain represents the Hercules pillars; the Ocean of the West is Binah; the Nile
is the Milky Way – Nuit. Dwellers in Thebai are parts of the soul of Ruach, concentrated
in Tiphareth, where there are their temples of initiation and awakening of light.
If you attained one Grade then you should understand it and conceive the path “onwards”
without imagining and fantasizing about what it looks like “there“ or “above” or
“further” – these are useless deceptions – an Adept must face with the introspection on
Here and Now, without conditionality and limitations on possible and unrealistic ideas
about the “worlds“ of the Spirit that he has not touched yet.
50. Let not the priest of Isis uncover the nakedness of Nuit, for every step is a
death and a birth. The priest of Isis lifted the veil of Isis, and was slain by the
kisses of her mouth. Then was he the priest of Nuit, and drank of the milk of
the stars.
Cheth; the Knight of Understanding, the bearer of the Holy Grail “should“ be pervaded
by his understanding of the Universe, while the understanding of Nuit should be followed
as a “consequence“ of the next spiritual step in the hierarchy of initiation. Isis is Binah,
the death of the Master opens “what“ is “above“ – the Mystery of Nuit – the Starry Sky
above the Divine Mother Nature.

51. Let not the failure and the pain turn aside the worshippers. The
foundations of the pyramid were hewn in the living rock ere sunset; did the
king weep at dawn that the crown of the pyramid was yet unquarried in the
distant land?
Teth; the Goddess rules over the animal soul that feels a failure and the pain. Still, the
soul will not be discouraged from spiritual aspiration.
Foundation – 9 – Teth; the base and firmness of achievement was set even before the
initiation, and the crown „exists“ for Adept – the Aspirant, even when he/she has not yet
reached it. Everything goes through the processes and stages, so the spiritual cognition
and Path have flows of accomplishment.

52. There was also an humming-bird that spake unto the horned cerastes,
and prayed him for poison. And the great snake of Khem the Holy One, the
royal Uraus serpent, answered him and said:
Yod; the humming-bird is the restless mind of the Man of Earth; he addresses Adonai for
the Knowledge – and to each question, Adonai answers.

53. I sailed over the sky of Nu in the car called Millions-of-Years, and I saw
not any creature upon Seb that was equal to me. The venom of my fang is the
inheritance of my father, and of my father’s father; and how shall I give it
unto thee? Live thou and thy children as I and my fathers have lived, even
unto an hundred millions of generations, and it may be that the mercy of the
Mighty Ones may bestow upon thy children a drop of the poison of eld.
Kaph; Adonai – the horned cerastes sailed over the sky of Nu and there is no single being
on Earth that is divine – everyone has a material body and soul that is endowed with
“human“ qualities; Adonai points out that the Spiritual Cognition came from the Father
of his Father – (Kether of Chokmah) Yod of Yod – the dot of Hadit from which the
flame of Yod emanates. Through his animal, mind and emotional knowledge, one cannot
reach the state of the spirit – spirituality awakens in Man only by identifying with Adonai
– who then conceives that “he“ is Adonai himself, the God.
54. Then the humming-bird was afflicted in his spirit, and he flew unto the
flowers, and it was as if naught had been spoken between them. Yet in a little
while a serpent struck him that he died.
Lamed; the Mind, Ruach, deals with individual experiences which attract attention with
its “beauty“ of image and fascination – the word of instruction is not understood – the
mind is being “killed“ as Adonai touches it – the presence of Adonai has a beneficial
outcome on the Aspirant.

55. But an Ibis that meditated upon the bank of Nile the beautiful god listened
and heard. And he laid aside his Ibis ways, and became as a serpent, saying
Peradventure in an hundred millions of millions of generations of my
children, they shall attain to a drop of the poison of the fang of the Exalted
One.
Maim; the Ibis represent a sublime intellect in man, not a restless chronicle of
“cleverness“; becoming a serpent Adonai is essential to such achievement. Commitment
to the ”aim“ of Gnosis, when one sees its essential purpose that is Above All, determines
unconditional aspiration in the endless time and space continuum.

56. And behold! ere the moon waxed thrice he became an Uraus serpent, and
the poison of the fang was established in him and his seed even for ever and
for ever.
Nun; by the power of dedication to the spiritual, time loses its meaning and effect –
Adonai is embodying himself through Adept. Adept and Adonai are One, there is no
difference.

57. O thou Serpent Apep, my Lord Adonai, it is a speck of minutest time, this
travelling through eternity, and in Thy sight the landmarks are of fair white
marble untouched by the tool of the graver. Therefore Thou art mine, even
now and for ever and for everlasting. Amen.
Samekh; Apep is the Serpent, Adonai is HOOR. “Pillar is established in the Void“ – they
are One, there is no difference. This verse is a seal and confirmation of the Master's Unity
with God.

58. Moreover, I heard the voice of Adonai: Seal up the book of the Heart and
the Serpent; in the number five and sixty seal thou the holy book. As fine gold
that is beaten into a diadem for the fair queen of Pharaoh, as great stones
that are cemented together into the Pyramid of the ceremony of the Death of
Asar, so do thou bind together the words and the deeds, so that in all is one
Thought of Me thy delight Adonai.
Ayin; the voice of the Light. This is the book of the Heart and the Serpent – Adeptus and
Adonai. 65 is LXV: “L“ is Isis – the Mother; “V“ is Osiris – the Father, and “X“ is the
Divine Son – Adonai, the Light of the Cross.
Fine gold – Tiphareth; diadem – crown; queen – Binah; Death of Asar is the cross of
Chesed.
 Thoughts, words and deeds which are refined by the experience of Adonai are delights of
Adonai, as Nuit says: “I am above you, and in you, my joy is to see your joy.“ The joy of
the people and the joy of Goddess Nuit is One Joy.

59. And I answered and said: It is done even according unto Thy word. And it
was done. And they that read the book and debated thereon passed into the
desolate land of Barren Words. And they that sealed up the book into their
blood were the chosen of Adonai, and the Thought of Adonai was a Word and
a Deed; and they abode in the Land that the far-off travellers call Naught.
Pe; debating and imposing the interpretation of this book is meaningless – only the words
that arise from Direct Experience of This Truth may seem to explain the parts of such
exalted writing, which is the continuum of the Thoughts of Adonai formed as the flow of
Master's Thoughts – who are One.
Only the Knowledge and Conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel represents the real
Gnosis of the Æon.
Through the Union of Adept and Adonai, Two “become“ Naught. There are no words
that can explain this, there are concepts of mind frames that can be metaphysically and
philosophically traced as a presentation, and even as an “interpretation“ of the
Experience, but the Experience itself is transcendental – it is Nothing.

60. O land beyond honey and spice and all perfection! I will dwell therein
with my Lord for ever.
Tzaddi; perfection is in the Flame of the Lord Adonai.

61. And the Lord Adonai delighteth in me, and I bear the Cup of His gladness
unto the weary ones of the old grey land.
Qoph; Adept translates his Understanding to his fellowmen. The Gnosis of Æon flows,
the Master radiates His Light.

62. They that drink thereof are smitten of disease; the abomination hath hold
upon them, and their torment is like the thick black smoke of the evil abode.
Resh; solar egoism is a meaningless disease, and the Ego is like an illusion of the center;
in fact, an evil abode in which the Real Light is hidden.
The wisdom that the Master conveys to humans will cause them to “get sick“, in other
words, to move and to change themselves in relation to the “normal“ state of their
ordinary “health“; abomination is a force that tears apart a person when he realizes how
many limitations he has built around himself and with how much sin he has reconciled;
Man dwells in the world of self-created suffering, in the evil abode of the “illusion“ of
reality that he is a part separated from All.

63. But the chosen ones drank thereof, and became even as my Lord, my
beautiful, my desirable one. There is no wine like unto this wine.
Shin; determining towards spiritual Knowledge by tasting the wine from the cup of the
Master, moves Man to make a complete rebellion against his restrictions, so he could no
longer be a “dead man“, but, having heard the trumpets of the Final Judgment, he raised
 from his material grave and becomes aware that he is not only a man but Æon itself,
Adonai.

64. They are gathered together into a glowing heart, as Ra that gathereth his
clouds about Him at eventide into a molten sea of Joy; and the snake that is
the crown of Ra bindeth them about with the golden girdle of the death-
kisses.
Tau; the Light of the Cross.
“Come forth, o children, under the stars, & take your fill of love!”
The meaning of Liber LXV is awakening of the glowing heart – Anahata, Tiphareth,
which is Horus crowned by the Uraeus snake.
The multitude in Man is summed up through his Self-Awareness, he perfects his
qualities, understands their nature, and conceives his sense of existence. He does what his
own Will is; he is inseparable from Adonai with whom he is in an ecstatic love bond of
interweaving energy and consciousness – One consciousness that permeates the
Universe.

65. So also is the end of the book, and the Lord Adonai is about it on all sides
like a Thunderbolt, and a Pylon, and a Snake, and a Phallus, and in the midst
thereof he is like the Woman that jetteth out the milk of the stars from her
paps; yea, the milk of the stars from her paps.
Each word of this book is about Adonai, leading the mind of the Initiate towards Adonai,
dedicating an Adept to realize the connection with Adonai, representing the Mastery
which, through the Hermit of Thelema, manifests as Adonai.
Adonai pervades the four elements by his Spirit, moving their essential features towards
the understanding of every aspect and meaning of the elements nature, by inducting them
into a quintessential unification with the Divine principle and potential in Everything.
Adonai is a “reflection“ of the Starry Goddess Nuit.
APPENDIX I
APPENDIX II [ 9 9 ]
APPENDIX III
 THE TASK OF A PROBATIONER
0. Let any person be received by a Neophyte, the latter being responsible to his Zelator.
1. The period of Probation shall be at least one year.
2. The aspirant to the A ∴ A ∴ shall hear the Lection (Liber LXI) and this note of his office; IF
HE WILL, shall then procure the robe of a Probationer; shall choose with deep forethought and
intense solemnity a motto.
3. On reception, he shall receive the robe, sign the form provided and repeat the oath appointed, and
receive the First Volume of the Book.
4. He shall commit a chapter of Liber LXV to memory; and furthermore, he shall study the
Publications of the A ∴ A ∴ in Class B, and apply himself to such practices of Scientific
Illuminism as seemeth him good.
5. Beside all this, he shall perform any tasks that the A ∴ A ∴ may see fit to lay upon him. Let
him be mindful that the word Probationer is no idle term, but that the Brothers will in many a
subtle way 'prove' him, when he knoweth it not.
6. When the sun shall next enter the sign under which he hath been received, his initiation may be
granted unto him. He shall keep himself free from all other engagements for one whole week
from that date.
7. He may at any moment withdraw from his association with the A ∴ A ∴ , simply notifying the
Neophyte who introduced him.
8. He shall everywhere proclaim openly his connection with the A ∴ A ∴ and speak of It and Its
principles (even so little as he understandeth) for that mystery is the enemy of Truth.
One month before the completion of his year, he shall deliver a copy of the Record of his year's work
to the Neophyte introducing, and repeat to him his chosen chapter of Liber LXV.
9. He shall hold himself chaste, and reverent toward his body, for that the ordeal of initiation is no
light one. This is of peculiar importance in last two months of his Probation.
10. Thus and not otherwise may he attain the great reward: YEA, MAY HE OBTAIN THE GREAT
REWARD!
 PROBATIONER EXAMINATION
I
1. Analyse your magickal Motto. Realise how it manifested through Yourself.
2. Explain how Liber LXV affected you and what is your opinion of it.
3. List the books that you have read in a period of your Probation. Make notice of their influence.
4. Report on practices that you have performed during your Probation.
5. Pay notice to your Magickal diary, and report about its permanence and regularity, and also of
what nature are your notices and memos in it.
6. What was your health condition during Probation?
7. Report on anything that you think might have relation to your association with and Probation in
A∴A∴.
8. Make a report on your opinion of A ∴ A ∴ .
9. Explain your opinion on The Great Work, what it means to you, and how you gained the
knowledge of your own nature. Pay attention to the Oath of Probationer as related to your Great
Work.
10. Explain your everyday job/work (which keeps you alive in the mundane world).
11. Explain yourself (your life and spirituality) in relation to Four elements.
12. Did you have any specific (spiritual) insight (or dream/s) during Probation? Analyse that.

II
13. Buddhism might be „separated” into several sections: Hinayana, Mahayana, 12 sects of Japan,
and Chinese Buddhism. Which parts of Christianity can be compared to these four?
14. What is the meaning of numbers: 148, 210, 451, 831.
15. Explain the equation 3=4 – in relation to Sephiroth and Planets. Explain the number 65 – the
polarity of its meaning.
16. Explain the difference between Vedantism, Sufism and Molinism.
 SCHEME OF WORK

1. Type of work
2. Aim of work
3. Time of work
4. Place of work
5. Plan of work
6. Essential points of work
7. Physical health
8. Psychological condition
9. Atmosphere
10. Instruments and weapons
11. Possible obstacles
12. Stumbled obstacles
13. Impressions before work
14. Impressions during work
15. Impressions after work
16. Insights and observations
17. Lessons learned
18. Comments
19. Additional notes
20. Work rating
APPENDIX IV
 APPENDIX V

Frater Alion
TTTT Thelemic Tarot
XXI - THE UNIVERSE
XX - THE ÆON
XIX - THE SUN
XVIII - THE MOON
XVII - THE EMPEROR
XVI - THE TOWER
XV - THE DEVIL
XIV - ART
XIII - DEATH
XII - THE HANGED MAN
XI - LUST
X - FORTUNE
IX - THE HERMIT
VII - THE CHARIOT
VI - THE LOVERS
V - THE HIEROPHANT
IV - THE STAR
III - THE EMPRESS
II - THE HIGH PRIESTESS
I - THE MAGUS
O - THE FOOL
SOON TO BE PUBLISHED

Anatomy of the Abyss

The Neophyte’s Compendium

Sleeping Self
The Art of Lucid Dreaming

Sigilism

FRATER273.com
[1]
It should not be confused with the Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn.
[2]
Aleister Crowley “One Star in Sight”.
[3]
Liber XXXIII, An Account of A ∴ A ∴ .
[4]
In no case the Knowledge and Conversation, this would mean that the Aspirant has achieved the
Rose and the Cross.
[5]
Aleister Crowley - Liber HHH sub figura CCCXLI, section MMM.
[6]
Binah.
[7] The building of the Pyramid is to establish the balance of the elements.
[8]
Tahuti is .
[9]
Twin warriors are Ra-Hoor-Khuit and Hoor-Paar-Kraat.
[10]
Mater shines refers to LVX.
[11]
Snake is Kundalini.
[12]
Ibis is Tot. Phoenix is Hoor, with wings is Asi. These are ‫ א‬,‫ מ‬and ‫ ש‬.
[13]
A display of Caduceus, which is the whole Tree of Life.
[14]
It refers to Asi, which is .
[15]
The fire here is Prana, life energy, while Oil is . Temptation, purification, and consecration are
aspects of Initiation
[16]
Solar motion.
[17]
After follows .
[18]
The Secret Word refers to a specific vibratory process that takes place through the Initiation, to a
unique aspect of the Initiation, to a specific compression of the Initiation influence into one single
vibration. This Word is a secret known by the Initiates of the Order of the A ∴ A ∴ , as well as some
Zelators from the Order of Thelemites.
[19]
Hua-Ho is the vibration of Kether, IAO is the vibration of Tiphareth; these vibrations absorb and
harmonize the effect of the Secret Word.
[20]
Asi is , the wand is , the wheel is their external manifested union.
[21]
The five is the Pentagram; the Spirit without life energy could not carry the life of the elements.
[22]
APeP is 161 as well as “Alion”/Elion – “The Highest.”
[23]
ADI is ‫אדנ י‬, Holy Guardian Angel. Shadow of the Pylon is what is underneath the path of ‫ ס‬.
[24]
Iota is Hebrew ‫ י‬and the Grade of Hermit. It is the root, the seed. ADI is, therefore, the Grades of
the Man of Earth, the Lover, and the Hermit. They receive their Words; the Man of Earth receive the
word of the Neophyte, the Lover the name of the Angel, while the Hermit is given the word of the whole
Æon. ADI is also the IAD, the Enochian Supreme Emanation.
[25]
Elements are established and dedicated unto the Highest.
[26] The process of spiritual testing, purification, consecration and awakening are being followed.
[27]
This is Asar as a human being, a traveler on the Path, a seeker. These are the characteristics of
non-consecrated, non-initiated one.
[28]
However, the ear, organ of is hearing the Call.
[29]
Asar-Un-Nepher is the Self-Consecrated conscious Initiate, the Higher Self that gives the certainty
on Initiation.
[30]
The vibration that opens the portals of the unconscious so the man can fully confront his attributes
and elements.
[31]
Four fears which of eight. Also, the royal eight-fold path, Raja Yoga.
[32]
A dire demon is the fifth fear, which is the ignorance of the Spirit.
[33]
Being strong, cautious, progressing steadily and resourcefully, are the characteristics of the usage
of the elements. “In the straight Path” is the reference for .
[34]
These are three Great Questions relating to the Three Initiations. The throat is Daath. Below is the
Malkuth, in which the Neophyte is. The heart is from Adept's Tiphareth. “I” is not worth to pass that
Initiation.
[35]
.
[36]
Refers to the special operations of the Holy Spirit.
[37]
Om-Ah-Hum.
[38]
.
[39]
Identification with the dead body does not bring progress. However, there is a certain
Consciousness, the Soul that urges to seek through Will.
[40]
“Heart of me” is Tiphareth, and “heart of my mother” is Binah. “Heart that I had upon the earth”
is Malkuth. This is the connection of Tiphareth with each Sephiroth, referring to the Three Great
Initiations (see Liber TAU).
[41]
Hall of MAAT, the Truth. The truth is even in the most disgusting places, in the depths of the
subconscious with which the seeker must confront along the Way.
[42]
Again, the snake is Kundalini, it moves energies by upwards force, towards confrontation,
assimilation, convening, and transcendence.
[43]
A ∴ A ∴.
[44]
‫א‬.
[45]
‫ב‬.
[46]
‫ג‬.
[47]
‫ד‬.
[48]
Following all paths of the Tree of Life conceived as Qliphoth with whom the seeker is facing.
[49]
“I am under the Shadow of the Wings” refers to the eternal presence of the Angel, awareness about
him redeems everything.
[50]
Daath.
[51]
Malkuth.
[52]
Tiphareth.
[53]
Now rising through the elements toward Spirit.
[54]
, but also HoorOnSion.
[55]
The questions here refer to the , which bound the seeker.
[56]
.
[57]
.
[58]
Fatal and False Phantom are Active and Passive .
[59]
☉ – The Sun.
[60]
Finally, there arises the Awareness of the Supreme, which is superior to the elemental souls.
[61]
Hexagram.
[62]
Hoor-Paar-Kraat as an influence from Kether.
[63]
The top of the Pentagram is , whose head is in Kether which is the Crown of the Tree of Life.
[64]
LVX.
[65]
Ra-Hoor-Khuit.
[66]
Malkuth.
[67]
Hoor-Paar-Kraat.
[68]
This previous entity also applies to HeruRa-Ha.
[69]
Freedom. Realized Initiation,
[70]
As he had previously invoked them, he now consciously welcomes them as parts of himself.
[71]
To go. . Like God.
[72]
Consecration of each energy center by its own Light.
[73]
Baphomet.
[74]
The perfect one.
[75]
Muladhara.
[76]
Sahasrara.
[77]
Heru-Ra-Ha.
[78]
‫אהי ה‬.
[79]
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.
[80]
The Secret Word with its vibration rounds the whole process of Initiation. Because it is a vibration
of the Initiation itself. Choose well. 93!
[81]
Kether, Malkuth, Chesed and Geburah – “Qabalistic” Cross of Light.
[82]
He opens the Veil of Initiation alone because Initiation cannot be given but acquired. He opens the
Veal toward Tiphareth and becomes One with the light of Kether – this is the ultimate “aim” of all
Initiations.
[83] The pyramid is properly built, consecrated and awaked.
[84]
and
[85]
. Breath.
[86]
.
[87]
The Root.
[88]
.
[89]
Lunar motion.
[90]
This verse is the summary and meaning of the whole Ritual of the Pyramid. Pentagram.
[91]
Four material bearers of consecrated elements.
[92]
Eucharist follows.
[93]
. Awareness of the unity with the Spirit.
[94]
Full awareness. Rounding the circle. Completing the process. Foundation of the awakening
energies.
[95]
Some rituals shall be “half-known and half concealed” as it is written in the Book of the Law. So
we gave you here a part of the Mystery, half of what you now have, the other half is Your Experience,
Your Initiation.
[96]
Light in Extension.
[97]
Aleister Crowley, Liber LXV vel ADNI.
[98]
Liber 451, especially appropriate for the Adeptus Minor.
[ 9 9 ]
This section is partly incomplete.