Attachment Theory for

Beginners

Dr Paula Moore
Medical Adviser for Adoption &
Fostering
Humans are wired to survive, at all costs.
Children must attach to survive.

What is attachment?

A achmen i he d adic eg la i n f
em i n S fe 1996
 John Bowlby 1907-1990
Attachment is the lasting
psychological connectedness
between human beings
Early experiences in childhood
have an important influence on
development and behaviour later
in. life
Our early attachment styles are
established in childhood through
the infant/caregiver relationship
 Bowlby cont
In addition to this, Bowlby believed that
attachment had an evolutionary
component; it aids in survival.
The en i make ng em i nal
bonds to particular individuals [is] a basic
c m nen f h man na e
Bowlby a 2 year old goes to hospital

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s14Q-_Bxc_U
 John Bowlby 1969
Characteristics of
Attachment

Proximity Maintenance -. who do you like to be with?

Safe Haven -. Who provides you with comfort?

Secure Base -. ho i al a he e fo o ?

Separation Distress - who do you miss most when you are parted?
Ain h ange i a i n
SECURE ATTACHMENT
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n2ypD
Pqs9A0
 Internal Working Model:-
Secure Attachment
I am safe and secure someone is always
there for me
My needs will be met
I am loveable
I deserve to be taken care of
I am proud of myself
I feel positive about
exploring the world
 This leads to:-
Self confidence
The ability to manage transition
A love of learning new things
An ability to ask for and accept help
Sec i in ne n elf
Friendly, warm nice people
Ability to give love back
 Securely
Attached Adults

Tend to have trusting, long-term

relationships
Tend to have high self-esteem
Tend to enjoy intimate relationships
Seek out social support
Can share feelings with other people.
 Attachment Disorders
There are three different kinds of insecure
attachment:
Ambivalent
Avoidant
Disorganised
STRANGE SITUATION 2
AVOIDANT ATTACHMENT

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7KA-
atOMvHY
 Internal Working Model:-
Avoidant Attachment

No one cares about me

I am better off looking after
myself
I d n de e e be l ed
I am better off if I suppress
my feelings
I need to achieve
The world owes me a living
This leads to

Apparent self-sufficiency
A need achie e ba ed
on external recognition
Difficulty making close relationships
Inabili a k f hel ( I m n hi )
Yearning for approval
Good self-regulation, but may forget they
have feelings
Difficulty loving another person
difficulty with intimacy Avoidant
and close relationships
do not invest much
Attachment -
emotion in relationships adults
experience little distress
when a relationship ends
avoid intimacy by using
excuses
may fantasize about other
people during sex.
more accepting and likely
to engage in casual sex
failure to support partners
during stressful times
inability to share feelings,
thoughts and emotions
with partners.
Avoidant Attachment Causes:
The ca e a n he e f he child he
learns to manage on his own
Depression
Illness in single carer
Absent parents
Heavy drug/alcohol use
d m ed child en
STRANGE SITUATION 3
ANXIOUS/AMBIVALENT ATTACHMENT

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8UPbO
6jubZ4
 Internal Working Model
Ambivalent Attachment
I am not safe with these adults because
sometimes they hurt me
I can never be sure my needs will be met
The d n l e me
No one is there to support me
I need a lot of reassurance
I need someone to tell me I am
lovable
I am a failure
 This leads to:

Suspicion of strangers
Extreme anxiety
Seeking attention but it is never enough
High emotional needs
Feeling of failure and of being failed
Always feeling let down whatever they get is
never enough
Need to feel included among friends but never
satisfied
Intense relationships with the wrong people
Ambivalent Attachment - adults

Reluctance to get close to another adult

W ha a ne d e n eci ca e feeling
Frequent breakups
Relationships feel cold & distant
Distraught when breakup occurs
May cling to children as source of security
 Ambivalent Attachment -
Causes
Care giver has learning difficulties
Care giver abuses drugs/alcohol
Care giver has mental health issues
Care giver was otherwise preoccupied
 DISORGANISED
ATTACHMENT
Secure, ambivalent and avoidant attachment
are all ORGANISED attachment styles
Ambivalent and avoidant are not totally
effective but are at least coping strategies
DISORGANISED attachment is the
breakdown of organised coping strategies
It is thought to be caused by frightened or
frightening parental behaviour or trauma or
loss of parents
 Disorganised Attachment
Later added Mary Main 1974
Fea i h S l i n
A di gani ed a achmen e l hen
there is no organized strategy that works for
he child. Thei a en beha i i
unpredictable, so no organized strategy
allows them to feel safe and
get their needs met without
f igh and e .
 Disorganised
Attachment

Y mean h me
Y aem a en and a e he e
ec me

The 2 scenarios are incompatible with

e e hing ha he child b ain ha e l ed
to manage
The e l i F agmen a i n
 Inner Working Model :-
Disorganised Attachment

There is no Inner working model because all

coping strategies (attachment styles) are
broken
 Causes
The care giver has unresolved
trauma or grief of their own
(often abuse related)
The care giver presents as both aggressive
(hurtful) and caring at different times
Child has multiple incompatible views of both the
caregiver and themselves
Child needs both to protect themselves from the
caregiver and maintain a relationship with them
 BRADSHAW
W nded Inne Child
Unpredictable responses because the brain is
fragmented (or dissociated)
Everything is compartmentalised but the various
compartments have broken or non-existent links
Non sequential
behaviours (eg affection
followed by aggression)
 Disorganised Attachment
Acting out behaviours Bi a e
Aggression
Over-sexualised behaviours
Compulsive behaviours
Addictive behaviours
Thought-distortion
Self-harming
Narcissistic
Offending
Disorganised Attachment - causes

the most recently

recognised and often
has the most extreme
consequences
Children often
severely abused or
neglected
 Jennifer Freyd
This also explains why many abused
child en a e able f ge he ab e
be a al a ma
Dissociative coping strategies make it
easier to continue to live with an abusive
parent (than continuously recalling
traumatic events)
 ATTACHMENT DISORDERS:-
Typical presentations of carers
Depression
Low IQ
Drug/alcohol abuse
ASD
Overburdened/isolated
Looked After
Mental Health Problems
Abusive physical/sexual/emotional
Symptoms of Attachment Disorders
be e ficiall engaging, cha ming
(phoney)
a id e e c n ac
be indi c imina el affec i na e i h
strangers
lack he abili gi e ecei e affec i n
e hibi e eme c n l blem - (eg
stealing from family; secret solvent abuse,
etc)
be de ci e elf and he
lack kindne animal
Symptoms of Attachment Disorders
cont.

di la e a ic beha i , ell lie

ha e n im l e c n l
lack ca e-and-effect thinking
lack a c n cience
ha e abn mal ea ing a e n
show poor peer relationships
a k e i en n n en e e i n and ince an l cha e
be ina ia el demanding and cling
Symptoms of Attachment Disorders
continued

ha e abn mal eech a e n

di la a i e agg e i n ( king ange in
others)
be unable to trust others
show signs of depression
exhibit pseudo-maturity
have low self esteem
show signs of a guilt complex
show signs of repressed anger
sabotage placements such as school, foster
family, etc.
Not ALL of these will be exhibited!
Easily confused with other conditions
like ASD & ADHD (which may co-exist)
Managing Attachment
Disorders
A young person with Attachment
problems needs:-
to be able to respond positively to a significant
other person
c m l i h he ba ic le f cie
c m l i h ea nable e e
ha e a eali ic en e f elf
lea n be n n-
confrontational with others
acce e n ibili
for own actions
A young person with Attachment
problems needs
to feel valued
fi in and acce he famil d namic
manage em e / ange a ia el
nde and he ld a nd him
nde and hi n an , need and
feelings
to have a sense of his
own identity
REPARENTING!
 Ca e me d a b ke
attachment?
Safety is the core issue for children with
attachment disorders and other attachment
problems
They are distant and distrustful because they
feel unsafe in the world
They keep their guard up to
protect themselves, but it also
prevents them from accepting
love and support
 Repairing an Attachment Disorder
I i e en ial b ild he child
sense of security:
Positive role model
Set limits and boundaries
Take charge, yet remain calm when the child is
upset or misbehaving
Be immediately available to reconnect following
a conflict
Own up to mistakes and initiate repair
Try to maintain predictable routines and
schedules
Wha can o do o omo e o ld eace?
Go home and lo e o famil .

Mother Teresa