The Princess Diaries Meg Cabot MACMILLAN READERS[ MACMILLAN READERS f Z ELEMENTARY LEVEL ye MEG CABOT The Princess Diaries Retold by Anne Collins CANE AONMACMILLAN READERS ELEMENTARY LEVEL Founding Editor: John Milne The Macmillan Readers provide a choice of enjoyable reading materials for learners of English. The series is published at six levels — Starter, Beginner, Elementary, Pre-intermediate, Intermediate and Upper. Level control Information, structure and vocabulary are controlled to suit the students’ ability at each level. The number of words at each level: about 300 basic words Beginner about 600 basic words Elementary about 1100 basic words Pre-intermediate about 1400 basic words Intermediate about 1600 basic words about 2200 basic words Vocabulary Some difficult words and phrases in this book are important for understanding the story. Some of these words are explained in the story and some are shown in the pictures. From Pre-intermediate level upwards, words are marked with a number like this: ... words are explained in the Glossary at the end of the book. Answer Keys Answer keys for the Exercises and Points for Understanding sections can be found at www.macmillanenglish.comContents Notes About the Author and This Story A Picture Dictionary The People in This Story 1Am Mia “You're a Princess!” Lilly’s Place The Thermopolis-Renaldo Agreement Grandmere Blond Hair and Fake Nails A New Friend In the News I’m Famous! 10 My First Date 11 The Wrong Kind of Boy Points for Understanding Exercises NEW YoRK CITY | 'f Kilometres miles < o2 46 GREENWICH VILLAGENotes About the Author and This Story Meg Cabot (Meggin Patricia Cabot) was born in Bloomington, Indiana, U.S.A. She lives in New York City with her husband, Benjamin, and her cat, Henrietta. Meg Cabot studied Art at Indiana University. Then she became an illustrator of books and magazines. Meg’s first novel, Where Roses Grow Wild, was published in 1988. She wrote this book using the name Patricia Cabot. Her favorite authors are Jane Austen, Judy Blume, and Barbara Cartland. Her favorite food is pizza. Some of Meg Cabot’s stories are: The Princess Diaries (2000), The Princess Diaries: Take Two (2000), The Princess Diaries: Third Time Lucky (2001), The Princess Diaires: Mia Goes Forth (2002), The Princess Diaries: Give Me Five (2003). The first two stories about Princess Mia were made into the movie, The Princess Diaries (Buena Vista/Walt Disney Pictures, 2001). ecology the study of life on Earth and the way that people, animals and plants live together. e-mail a way of sending messages from one computer to another. E-mail messages can be sent on the Internet to chatrooms. You can have a conversation in an Internet chatroom because the computer messages are instant. environment the air, water and land on Earth, and all the living things in it. Greenpeace an international organization which works to protect the environment. online use a computer to talk to people ona computer network, and to search for information on the Internet. whales the largest animals that live in the sea. There are few whales because they have been hunted and killed by people for many hundreds of years.A Ficture Lictionary newsreporter’s van . tray penguin arr bit+€=0 whale algebra formula gq) 2. SB food carton (>) flashbulb LJ pancakes fake nailsThe People in This Story Mia (Amelia) Thermopolis Fat Louie Josh Richter 61 I Am Mia My name is Mia Thermopolis. I’m fourteen years old and I live in New York City. I live in an apartment in Greenwich Village, on the west side of the city. I live with my mom, Helen, and my cat, Fat Louie. My mom is an artist. She paints pictures. I'm a freshman—a ninth grade student at Albert Einstein High School. My best friend is Lilly Moscovitz. Lilly isn’t pretty but she’s very smart. She is interested in politics and ecology. Lilly writes reports about the people of New York and their problems. Then she makes films of her reports. She has her own TV show—Lilly Tells It Like It Is. Lillys mom and dad are doctors—they’re both sychoanalysts. Psychoanalysts find out about people’s feelings. Lilly has an older brother named Michael. My parents never got married. They stopped loving each other before I was born. Fourteen and a half years ago, they broke up their relationship. My parents’ relationship ended, but they’re still friends. My dad doesn’t live in New York. He lives in a small country called Genovia. It’s near the border of France and Italy. My dad is an important person in the government of Genovia. I visit. my dad every Christmas and summer. I stay with him and Grandmere—my grandmother—in her house in France. I’m not very popular at school. I don’t have lots of friends. And I don’t have a boyfriend. No boy has ever asked me out on a date because I look strange. I look like a freak. I’m the tallest girl in my grade. I have huge feet and very curly, light brown hair. I’m also very thin. 8I want to look like Lana Weinberger. Lana Weinberger is in my grade and she’s beautiful. She has long blond hair and big gray eyes. Lana is going out with Josh Richter. She’s dating the best-looking boy in the school. Josh is really GORGEOUS! He has blond hair and blue eyes. He’s six feet tall and very good at sports. He’s a senior student. My mom gave me this diary. She told me to write down my feelings. I don’t tell her my real feelings. That’s what she says. So she wants me to write them down. Tuesday, September 23rd My mom’s right. | don’t tell her about my real feelings. I 9think about my feelings. But I don’t tell anyone about them. I’ve decided to write my feelings here in my diary. MY MOM IS GOING OUT ON A DATE WITH MY ALGEBRA TEACHER, MR FRANK GIANINI! “I’m happy about this,” I told Mom. But I’m not happy. There are about two million guys in Manhattan. She could go out with any of them. Why does she want to go out with my school’s Algebra teacher? Wednesday, September 24th I told Lilly about my mom and Mr Gianini. “Mr Gianini is OK,” said Lilly. “He’s nice and his classes are easy.” Lilly’s good at Algebra. She doesn’t have to work hard in Algebra classes. But I’m flunking Algebra—I fail every Algebra test. Every afternoon, after school finishes, | have to do extra Algebra. That’s how Mr Gianini met my mom. He asked her to come to the school. “Mia is flunking Algebra,” he told her. “She needs to do extra work.”Then he asked my mom out ona date. “T don’t understand you, Mia,” said Lilly. “Why are you hiding your real feelings? Talk to your mom. You're not happy about her and Mr Gianini. Tell her this.” But I can’t talk to my mom. She’s very happy about her date with Mr Gianini. She’s being really nice to me. Last night, she made a special meal for me—pasta with lots of vegetables. I’m a vegetarian, so I don’t eat meat. I think about my mom kissing Mr Gianini. Then | think about Lana Weinberger and Josh Richter. 1 saw them kissing last week. I want Josh Richter to kiss me like that. Thursday, September 25th Today, Mr Gianini asked me a really easy question, but I didn’t hear it. I just sat there, looking at him. “What?” I said. Then Lana Weinberger leaned over my desk and stared at me. Her long blond hair touched my desk. “FREAK,” she said. I went to Lilly’s apartment after school. Her parents— the Doctors Moscovitz—were there. “Your mother is dating your Algebra teacher,” Lilly’s mother said. “How do you feel about that?” “I feel fine, Doctor Moscovitz,” I said. But I was lying. Lilly’s older brother, Michael, was also in the apartment. He’s a senior student, like Josh Richter. But Michael doesn’t play sports like Josh. Michael is only interested in computers. He spends a lot of time in his room, working on his computer. He writes an online magazine called Crackhead. “Your mom is dating Frank Gianini?” said Michael. And he laughed. lLFriday, September 26th This afternoon, during my Algebra class, Mr Gianini spoke to me quietly. He started talking about his date with Mom. “Mia, I’m going out with your mother,” he said. “Are you unhappy about that?” “Oh, no, Mr Gianini, it’s OK,” I said. I felt my face becoming red. “It’s only for one date, isn’t it?” “Well, maybe I’ll take her on more than one date. I really like your mother.” “OK,” I said. “But if you make her unhappy, I'll kill you.” I’ve been very rude to a teacher! Did I really say that to him? Mr Gianini smiled. “Mia, I’m not going to hurt your mother,” he said. “I will neverfupseher.” That evening, when my mom was out with Mr Gianini, my dad called from Genovia. He wanted to talk to Mom. He sounded very weird. His voice was really strange. I didn’t want to tell him about Mom and her date with Mr Gianini. I lied. “She’s working in her art studio,” I said. Saturday, September 27th I went into the kitchen early this morning. My cat, Fat Louie, wanted some food. My mom was there, and she was making pancakes! I couldn’t believe it. Mom never cooks breakfast. She usually wakes up later than me. She was in a very good mood. She was smiling happily. “Thad a wonderful time last night,” she said. Mom and Mr Gianini ate dinner at a Thai restaurant last night. They’re going on another date this week. I feel OK about this. I’m happy because my mom is happy. Sunday, September 28th My dad called again today. This time, Mom was in her art studio. My dad sounded very weird again. 12Monday, September 29th Today, Mr Gianini was in a very good mood. Suddenly he started talking about the school play. All the students are goingto actiand sing in the musical, My Fair Lady. “Mia, you could play the main character,” he said. I was surprised. Mr Gianini was only being nice. I knew that. But I can’t be in a musical. I can’t sing—my voice is horrible. Later, when I was with Lilly, Lana Weinberger came up to us. She started calling me a freak again. Josh Richter was with her. I knew why Lana said this. She wanted to hurt me. And she wanted Josh to see my unhappiness. “Leave us alone, Weinberger!” said Lilly angrily. Lana started to argue with Lilly. But Lilly isn’t afraid of Lana. She just laughs if people say bad things to her. Tuesday, September 30th Something weird has happened. When | got home from school, my mom was waiting for me. She had a strange look on her face. She spoke softly and quietly. “Your dad called,” she said. “He’s very upset. He’s heard some bad news. He’s sterile. He can’t have any more kids.” About a year ago, my dad was very ill. He had cancer. He had an operation—doctors had to cut the cancer out of his body. Then he had chemotherapy treatment. The chemotherapy worked well and the cancer hasn’t come back. “The chemotherapy has made your dad sterile,” Mom said. “He can never have another child.” I don’t understand why my dad is upset. Why does he want more kids? He already has me. I only see Dad at Christmas and in the summer, but that’s OK. He looks after Genovia and he’s always very busy. 13My dad’s hair fell out after the chemotherapy, but he’s still handsome. He looks like Captain Jean-Luc Picard in the TV show, Star Trek: The Next Generation. My dad has had a lot of girlfriends. He brings them to Grandmere’s house in France. They love the twenty-seven bedrooms, the ballroom, the swimming pools, and the farm. But Dad never goes out with any girl for more than a few months. “Dad is flying here, to New York, tomorrow,” said Mom. “He wants to talk to you, Mia.” Z “You’re a Princess!” Wednesday, October 1st My dad has arrived it New York. He’s staying at the Plaza Hotel, where all the aby people stay. Thursday, October 2nd. Afternoon. The Ladies’ Room at the Plaza Hotel I’ve had a terrible shock. Now I know why my dad wants more kids. IT’S BECAUSE HE’S A PRINCE! My dad is a politician and he’s rich. But he’s also the Prince of Genovia, and nobody told me! I’ve been to Genovia lots of times. Every summer, I stay in my grandmother's house, Miragnac. It’s on the border of France, near Genovia. Why didn’t she tell me the truth? A few years ago, I found some information about Genovia in an encyclopedia. | read these facts. The name of the Genovian royal, family was Renaldo. The head of the family was Prince Artur Christoff Philippe Gerard Grimaldi Renaldo. There was a picture of the prince. He had thick 14brown hair and a moustache. My dad’s family name is also Renaldo. My dad’s name is Philippe Renaldo. This afternoon, my dad and | sat in the Palm Court dining room at the Plaza Hotel. Lots of tourists go there. They like to have tea there in the afternoons. “I want you to know the truth, Mia,” began my dad in a very serious voice. “I am the Prince of Genovia.” This news was a terrible shock for me. Suddenly, I got “Really, Dad?” I said. Hiccup. I tried to stop the noise coming from my throat. But I couldn’t. Hiccup. Hiccup! ‘They were really loud hiccups! Hiecup! Hiccup! “Pm head of the royal family of Genovia,” said my dad. “Your mother didn’t want you to know this. She didn’t want you to grow up in a palace. I agreed with her. But unfortunately, I’ve now heard some bad news. I can’t have any more children. You're my only child, Mia. So you are now my heir. When I die, you will be the ruler of Genovia.” 15I hiccupped again. This was really embarrassing! The people who were sitting on the table beside us were staring at me. “Mia?” said my dad. “Are you listening?” “Dad, please excuse me for a minute,” I said. “I have to go to the bathroom.” I went into the ladies’ room. The ladies’ room at the Plaza is very beautiful. The walls and the carpets are pink. There are mirrors and little couches everywhere. I thought about what my dad had said. He’s the Prince of Genovia. I’m beginning to understand some things that | didn’t understand before. When I fly to France, there’s always a huge limousine waiting for me at the airport. When I go shopping with my grandmother, we always visit stores in the evening. We go shopping after ordinary people have gone home. We're always the only customers in the stores. Most people have never heard of Genovia. Nobody famous has come from there. But it is a very beautiful country. The weather is warm and sunny. In the north, there are mountains covered with snow. In the south, there is the blue Mediterranean Sea. In the center of the country, there are hills covered with olive trees. Olive oil is Genovia’s main export. Genovia sells a lot of olive oil to other countries. There’s a royal palace in Genovia. I’ve passed it lots of times when I was in the car with Grandmere. But she never told me who lived in it. My hiccups have gone now. I’Il go back to my dad. Late afternoon. The Penguin House at Central Park Zoo [I’ve hada second shock. I’m not going to tell anybody about my family. I’m not even going to tell Lilly. She won’t understand. No one will understand. I’m really upset. 16This is what happened. When my hiccups disappeared, | returned to the Palm Court dining room. My dad was speaking on his cellphone. He was talking to my mom. “Yes, I told her,” he was saying. “No, she doesn’t seem upset.” He looked at me. “Are you upset?” “No,” I said. I wasn’t upset—not then. My dad ended the call. “Did you understand what I told you, Mia?” he asked. “Yes,” I said. “You’re the Prince of Genovia.” “Yes,” he said. “But you’re not Mia Thermopolis any more.” “I’m not?” I said. “Then who am I?” “You’re Amelia Mignonette Grimaldi Thermopolis Renaldo, Princess of Genovia,” said my dad, a little sadly. WHAT? A PRINCESS? ME? It can’t be true. My mouth opened but no words came out. I started to cry. My dad leaned across the table and touched my hand. “It won’t be so bad,” he said. “You'll like living at the palace in Genovia with me. You can visit New York. You can see your friends as often as you want.” Then I got mad. I was so angry that I stopped crying. “1 DON’T want to live in Genovia,” I said in aloud voice. Everyone in the dining room turned and looked at me. My dad was shocked. “Mia,” he said, “I thought that you understood.” “J understand only one thing,” I said. “You lied to me all my life. You never told me the truth about your family. And why do I have to live with you in Genovia?” ickly and ran out of the hotel. I ran all the way down the street and into the middle of Central Park. It was getting dark, but I didn’t think about this. Suddenly I saw the gates of the Central Park Zoo. I’ve always loved that zoo. 17I paid my entrance money and went into the Penguin House. The funny little black and white birds swam around their pool and I watched them. Then I sat down and took my diary out of my bag. I’m writing in my diary now. What am I going to do? I can’t leave New York and live in Genovia. Evening mr Of course, I couldn’t hide in the Penguin House for ever. When the zoo closed, I took a bus home. My mom and dad were sitting at the kitchen table. The phone was in front of them. They both began talking at the same time. “Are you OK? Where have you been?” asked my mom. “We've been so worried!” said my dad. “Tran away. I’m sorry,” I said. Then | went into the bathroom and took a bath. After lying in the hot water for a long time, I put on my favorite pajamas. Then I picked up Fat Louie and went to bed. Before I fell asleep, | heard my mom and dad talking in the kitchen. A 3 Lilly’s Place Friday, October 3rd. Home When I woke up today, | felt better. It’s Friday—the day before the weekend. Friday is my favorite day of the week. Mom was in the kitchen, making breakfast. Dad was there too. He was sitting at the table and reading the New York Times. 18And then I remembered. I’m a princess! Suddenly, I felt unhappy again. “We need to talk, Mia,” said my dad. He folded his newspaper and laid it on the table. “Come and sit down, Mia. Have some breakfast,” said my mom. “I’ve made everything that you like.” I didn’t want to talk about my future in Genovia. “I have to go to school,” I said. “SIT DOWN!” said Dad loudly. Isat down, and Mom put some food onto my plate. “Mia,” she said, “Think of the lovely things that you can have in Genovia. When you're sixteen, you can have a car. Dad will buy you a car for your sixteenth birthday.” “T don’t want a car,” I said. “You’ve always wanted a horse, haven’t you?” she said. “You could have a horse in Genovia. A nice gray one...” My eyes filled with tears and I started to cry. “Mom,” I said, “Why are you saying this? Don’t you love me any more? Why are you making me leave? Why do I have to live with Dad? Is it because you and Mr Gianini don’t—” Then my mom started crying too. She jumped up from her chair and put her arms around me. “No, Mia,” she said. “I just want the best thing for you.” “So do I,” said my dad. “Well, I want to stay here and finish high school,” I said. “That's the best thing for me. Then I’m going to join Greenpeace. I’m going to save whales from danger.” “You're not going to look after whales!” said my dad. “Please, Philippe,” said my mom. “We can’t talk about this now. Mia has to go to school. She’s late.” I started looking for my coat. “Yes,” I said. “I have to get to the subway station.” 19“No,” said my dad. “Lars will drive you to school.” “But I have to meet Lilly,” I said. “I meet her every day, and we go to school together on the subway.” “Lars can pick up your friend too,” said Dad. Lars is my dad’s driver. He goes everywhere with my dad. But now I realize something. Lars isn’t just my dad’s driver. Lars is also my dad’s bodyguard. His job is to protect my dad.) Lars came up to the apartment and walked downstairs tol the car with me. It was really embarrassing. Algebra class Lilly was very surprised to see Lars. “My dad’s in town and Lars is my dad’s driver,” I said. “Why are your eyes red?” asked Lilly. “Have you been’ crying? What’s happened?” “Nothing has happened,” I said. I didn’t want to tell Lilly: the truth. Now I’m sitting here in the Algebra class. But I feel better. Nobody can make me be a princess. This is America. People are free in America. They can live in any place and in any way that they want. If I don’t want to be a princess, I don’t have to be one. I'll tell my dad tonight. Late evening. Lilly’s bedroom I didn’t go to my extra Algebra class with Mr Gianini this: afternoon. When school finished, I spoke to Lilly. “Can I stay at your place tonight?” I asked. She said yes, so I called my mom. “Can I stay the night at Lilly’s apartment?” I asked her. “But, Mia, your father wanted to have another talk with you this evening.” } “Pll be home tomorrow, Mom,” I said quickly. “And I won’t forget to do the shopping on the way home.” 20Saturday, October 4th. Early morning. Lilly’s place | always have a great time when I stay with Lilly. The Moscovitzes are nice and their apartment is huge. Lilly’s parents—the Doctors Moscovitz—never forget to pay bills. They always have delicious food in their refrigerator. They even buy vegetarian food for me to eat. I love my mom very much. But she spends a lot of time in her art studio. She doesn’t spend much time at home with me. Sometimes, Mom forgets to pay the bills. Sometimes, she even forgets to buy food. I want my mom to be like Lilly’s mom. I want my dad to be like Lilly’s dad. At Lilly’s place, I can relax. I feel very comfortable and happy there. When I’m with the Moscovitzes, I don’t worry about Algebra. I don’t worry about being a princess. Last night, Lilly’s parents went out. So Lilly and I climbed into their huge bed and watched James Bond movies on their big TV. Then Lilly’s brother, Michael, came into the room. 21“Your dad is on the phone,” he said to me. “I don’t want to speak to him.” [ replied. “OK,” said Michael. “You and Lilly already went to bed. Pll tell him that.” Michael went and spoke to my dad again. Then he came back and watched James Bond movies with us. We had a really good conversation about our favorite actors and actresses. When Lilly’s parents came home, Lilly and I went back to her room. “Mia, who do you prefer?” asked Lilly. “Josh Richter, or my brother, Michael?” “Josh Richter,” I said. I’m in Love with Josh Richter. He’s the best-looking boy in the school. I love his blond hair and blue eyes. But later, I thought about Michael. He isn’t as good- looking as Josh, but he makes me laugh. One time, | saw Michael coming out of his bedroom. He wasn’t wearing a shirt, and he looked really good. I’ve never told Lilly my thoughts about her brother. She’ll think that I’m weird. 4 The Thermopolis‘Renaldo Agreement Saturday, October 4th. Afternoon I stayed at Lilly’s place as long as I could today. But I was worried about my mom and dad. I didn’t go home last night. Were they angry all night? I came home after lunch. I’ve always been a good daughter. I don’t smoke cigarettes, and I don’t take drugs. I do my homework most of the time, and people trust me. I’m an honest person. When I got home, my mom was reading a magazine. She 22always goes to her art studio on Saturdays. But today she had stayed at home, waiting for me. My dad was there too. He was reading the New York Times. “We must talk,” he said. “Please, Dad,” I said. “I need time to think about things.” “T know,” said my dad. Then my mom came over and put her arms around me. “We're so sorry, Mia,” she said. | was very surprised. Why were my parents being so nice? Why weren’t they angry with me? “This is difficult for you, Mia,” said my dad. “We understand that now. So we’ve done something to make things easier.” My dad pulled a document from his pocket and put it on the cable in front of me. I started to read it. THE THERMOPOLIS-RENALDO AGREEMENT |, Artur Christoff Philippe Gerard Grimaldi Renaldo, make this agreement. My daughter and heir, Amelia Mignonette Grimaldi Thermopolis Renaldo, can stay at her school, Albert Einstein High School. But she must spend every Christmas and every summer in Genovia. | felt very happy. Then I read the rest of the agreement. |, Amelia Mignonette Grimaldi Thermopolis Renaldo, will do my duties as heir to Artur Christoff Philippe Gerard Grimaldi Renaldo, Prince of Genovia. | will become the ruler of Genovia when he dies. | will also go to all the functions of state. “What are functions of state?” I asked. “Special ceremonies,” said my dad. “When an-important event happens in the world, every country sends someone— a representative. For example, when the leader of a country inarries or dies, a representative of the Genovian royal 23family goes to the ceremony. You're the Princess of. Genovia, so you will go to these functions of state. You will represent Genovia.” “But I don’t know how to behave like a princess,” I said. “That’s OK,” said my dad. “Grandmere will teach you.” I thought about this. How can Grandmere teach me? She’s not here in New York, she’s in France. I signed my name at the bottom of the agreement. Evening It’s Saturday night, and I don’t have a date with a boy. I’m spending the evening with my DAD! I’m always at home on Saturday nights. Boys don’t want to go out with me. My mom has gone out on a date with Mr Gianini. She was wearing a small black dress and high-heeled shoes. My dad stared and stared at her. She looked really beautiful. Usually, my mom isn’t very interested in clothes. 1 phoned a restaurant that delivers food to the apartment. I ordered a pizza and some salad. It was a delicious meal. But my dad wasn’t interested in the food. He watched sports programs on TV and drank whisky. Then he fell asleep. I tried to call Lilly, but her phone was busy. Maybe Michael was chatting online with a friend. Michael uses his computer at lot. He works on his magazine, Crackhead, and chats online with his friends for hours. He uses his computer to send instant messages. He has conversations in Internet chatrooms. I really wanted to speak to Lilly. I wasn’t going to tell her about being a princess. But sometimes just talking to Lilly makes me feel better. I watched my dad sleeping. I started to get bored. I decided to send Michael an instant message. 1 wanted him 24to go offline. Then I could call Lilly. Michael and I use different names when we chat to each other online. I’m “FtLouie,” which means Fat Louie. It’s the name of my cat. Michael uses the name “CracKing”—a criminal who sells drugs. Michael is clever and funny. He’s ‘ilways making jokes. This was our conversation: @racKing: What do you want, Thermopolis? MtLouie: I want to talk to Lilly. I want to speak to her on the phone. Please go offline. GracKing: What do you want to talk to her about? Louie: I’m not telling you. It’s private. Cracking: Why are you at home? Didn’t Dreamboy call you? Didn‘t he ask you out? W'tLouie: Who’s Dreamboy? CracKing: Josh Richter, of course. | love Josh Richter, and now Michael knows this! Lilly told her brother my secrets! I’m really embarrassed! I’m yoing to kill her! But five minutes later, my phone rang. It was Lilly. “You wanted to talk to me,” she said. “Michael told me.” Michael can be so nice sometimes. Sunday, October 5th | didn’t go to Mr Gianini’s Algebra class on Friday, and he told my mom. I can’t believe it?I had to stay at hom I had to study Algebrawith my DAD! There’s an Algebra test) it school tomorrow. I must not ¢ I’ve written an important Algebra formula on the bottom of my sneaker. I can Look at the formula during the test. Monday, October 6th, 3:00 a.m. I've been awake all night. I’ve been worrying about the Algebra formula that’s on my shoe. What will happen if 25someone sees it? If I look at the formula, I'll be cheating. VIL no longer be an honest person. I'll have to leave Albert Einstein High School if someone finds out about this. And I'll never get a job at Greenpeace. 4:00 a.m. I tried to wash the formula off my sneaker, but it won’t come off! | can't wear my boots instead of my sneakers, The laces of my boots are broken. } 7:00 a.m. Ry faut Someone will see me cheating in the ef Algebra test. | just k t , : gebra test. | just know i hb, ~~ _ 9:00 a.m. I’m in the girls’ room at school, Lanw Weinberger came in. and she saw me washing the bottom of my sneaker. Then rted brushing her long blond hale, and staring at she herself in the mirror | couldiy't wash the formula off my sneaker, But I’m not going to look at i during the test. Evening OK—I looked at the formula during the teat, But it didn’t help me at all. | got all the answer wrong anyway, Lean’e even cheat well! Thave so many things to worry about, | must buy new laces for my boots. I’m flunking Alyebri, My mons dating my Algebra teacher. I’m the Princess of Genowli, Hate my life. 265 Grandmere Wednesday, October 8th Grandmere’s HERE! She’s not here in our apartment. But she’s here in New York. She’s staying at the Plaza Hotel, with my dad. Maybe Grandmere won’t come to our apartment. She hates cats and Fat Louie is here. Also, Grandmere will hate Greenwich Village. No one is allowed to smoke cigarettes in. the restaurants here and she smokes all the time. Why did she have to come here? Why? Why? WHy? Thursday, October 9th 1 found out why Grandmere has come to New York. She's going to give me PRINCESS CLASSES! This is terrible. I can’t write any more. Friday, October 10th Yesterday, after school, I had my first princess class. It’s not a joke. Every day, after my Algebra lesson with Mr Gianini, | have princess classes at the Plaza with my grandmother. I signed the Thermopolis-Renaldo Agreement. My dad reminded me about this. The princess classes are part of my duties as my dad’s heir. That’s what I agreed to. I checked the agreement. But I couldn’t see anything in it about princess classes. Grandmere is staying in the penthouse suite of the Plaza. She’s staying in the huge, luxury rooms on the top floor of the hotel. Everything in the penthouse is colored pink. There are pink walls, pink carpets, pink drapes, and pink furniture. There are lots of vases of pink roses too. 27Grandmere’s name is Clarisse Marie Renaldo, She is my father’s mother. She is the Dowager Princess of Genovia. Grandmere wears lots of makeup and smokes cigarettes all the time. All her clothes are purple, Purple is her favorite color. Grandmere started asking me questions immediately. She is scary. She frightens me. “Stand up straight, Amelia,” she said, “Your hair is too curly. And why are you so ti Come and kiss your grandmere.” I walked over and ki Then I saw Rommel—imy grandmother's dog, He was looking out from behind her skirt, He's fifteen years old and he was wearing a purple jacket. It's the same color as Grandmere’s dress. “Now,” said Grandmere, “You are Princess of Genovia. You cried when your father told you the news. Why?” I? Can't you stop growing? Ther, 28Suddenly I felt very tired. | sat down on one of the pink chairs. “Oh, Grandma,” I said in English. “I don’t want to be a princess. | just want to be me—Mia.” “Don’t call me Grandma,” said Grandmere. “I’m your grandmere. Speak French when you speak to me. Sit up straight in that chair. And your name isn’t Mia—it’s Amelia.” She sat down in the chair next to me. “Don’t you want to be a princess?” “Grandma—I mean, Grandmere,” I said, “I can never be like a princess.” “You are your father’s heir,” said Grandmere in a very serious voice. “When your father dies, you'll rule Genovia.” I stared at Grandmere and she stared at me. “I have a lot of homework today,” I said. “Is this princess class going to take a long time?” “We'll begin classes tomorrow,” she said. “You'll come here in the afternoons, after school. Write a list before you come here tomorrow. Make a list of the ten women who you admire most. And give reasons. Bring the list with you.” My mouth fell open with shock. Homework? I’ve got to do homework for these princess classes? “Close your mouth, Amelia,” said Grandmere. “Tomorrow you'll do your hair nicely. You'll wear lipstick and paint your nails with nailpolish. And you won't wear those big, ugly boots. Now I have a dinner appointment. Goodbye.” Today, I borrowed one of my mom’s lipsticks and took it to school. But I didn’t want anyone to see me wearing lipstick. I waited until after my class with Mr Gianini. When all the other kids had gone home, | went into the girls’ room. | put lipstick on my lips and brushed my hair. My hair is very curly. I brushed it and brushed it, but it didn’t look better. 29I'd forgotten about the school Computer Club. The Computer Club has a meeting at Albert Einstein High School every Triday afternoon, Lilly’s brother, Miehael, is in the Computer Club, When I walked out of the girls’ room, | met Michae my bag and the lipstick fell out. Michael picked it up. He stared at . | dropped me in surprise. “Why are you wearing this?” he asked, holding the lipstick toward me. “Please don’t tell Lilly,” I said. ~S “Don’t tell Lilly what?” he said. “Where are you going? Are you going ona date?” “No, I am not going on a date!” | said. “I have to meet my grandmother.” “Do you usually wear lipstick when you meet your grandmother?” I looked toward the door. Dad’s bodyguard, Lars, was standing there. He was waiting for me. He was going to drive me to the Plaza Hotel. “Michael, don’t tell Lilly about this. OK?” I said. Then I ran away. When I got to the Plaza, Grandmere was HORRIBLE. “You're wearing too much lipstick,” she said. “And it’s the wrong color for you.” I gave her my list of the ten women who I admire. But she tore up the piece of paper. “They're not good choices,” she said. Then she told me to come back at ten o'clock the next morning. 30“Grandmere, tomorrow is Saturday,” I said. “I always help my friend, Lilly, on Saturdays. We film her TV show.” But Grandmere didn’t listen to me. So when I got home, I called Lilly. I wanted to say, “I can’t help you tomorrow. | have to spend the day with my grandmother.” But no one answered the phone, The Moscovitz family were out. Saturday, October 11th, 9:30 a.m. I called Lilly early this morning. This was our conversation. “You have to spend the day with your grandmother?” she said angrily. “I don’t believe you, Mia. Why didn’t you say ‘no’ to your grandmother? We always spend Saturdays together.” “Lilly, you don’t know my grandmother,” | said. “She's scary. I can’t just say ‘no’ to her.” “{ don’t know your grandmother,” said Lilly. “That’s true, Mia. I don’t know anything about her. It’s very strange. You know all about my grandparents.” I’ve never introduced Lilly to Grandmere because Grandmere hates children. Also, she hates hearing about poor peoples’ problems. Lilly makes TV films about the problems of poor people. I can’t introduce Lilly to Grandmere now. I’m a princess. | don’t want Lilly to know about my future life in Genovia. “Well, come to my place tonight,” Lilly said. “I have to finish my film. You can help me.” Then she hung up the phone. Now I’m in the car with Lars. We’ve just arrived at the Plaza Hotel. I’m going to meet Grandmere. 316 Blond Hair anne Fake Nails Saturday, October 11th. Late afternoon I can never go to school again. I can never go anywhere again. I’m so embarrassed. [ look awful. I’m really angry with Grandmere. This morning, she was waiting for me in the entrance of the Plaza Hotel. “On y va,” she said, which in English means, “Let’s go.” “Let’s go where?” J asked. “Chez Paolo,” said Grandmere. Chez Paolo means “Paul’s house.” “Maybe Grandmere has a friend called Paul,” | thought. “And maybe we’te going to his house.” But Chez Paolo wasn’t a house. It was a beauty salon, and Paolo was a stylist. He makes ordinary people like me look beautiful. That is Paolo’s job. First, he cut my hair short. Then, he colored it blond. My real fingernails are very ugly because I bite them. So he stuck beautiful long fingernails made of plastic on top of my own nails. Then he put makeup on my face. When Paolo had finished, I looked in a mirror. I got a shock. He had turned me into a different person! Then Grandmere took me to some very expensive shoe shops and clothes shops. She bought me four pairs of shoes, and lots of clothes. Grandmere’s very happy because | don’t look like Mia Thermopolis any more. Mia Thermopolis never had blond hair or fake fingernails. Mia Thermopolis never wore makeup, or beautiful, expensive shoes and clothes. ai SY.But I’m not happy at all. Who am I now? I don’t know. I’m not Mia Thermopolis. Grandmere is turning me into someone else. As soon as I got home, I tried to talk to my dad. But he didn’t listen to me. “What’s the problem, Mia?” he said. “You look beautiful. I like your new hairstyle. It’s very. . nice.” My mom came out of her bedroom. She was wearing a new skirt and top, and she looked great. She was going out on another date with Mr Gianini. My dad stared at her. “Mia,” said my mom, “your grandmother is just trying to prepare you.” “Prepare me for what?” I said. “I’m the Princess of Genovia but I don’t want anyone to know this.” “They'll find out about you soon,” said my mom. “Maybe they'll read your story in the newspaper.” “Why will it be in the newspaper?” I asked. My mom and dad looked at each other. Then my dad took out his wallet. He opened it and took out some money. “Allright, Mia,” he said. “How much do you want?” I was shocked. So was my mom. “I’m serious,” he said. “The Thermopolis-Renaldo Agreement isn’t working. | want your grandmother to turn you into a princess. So I’ll pay you to go to the princess lessons. How much do you want, Mia?” I started to speak. I didn’t want any money. But my dad said, “Listen. I'll give one hundred dollars a day to Greenpeace. The money will arrive with a letter from you. The money will help Greenpeace to save a lot of whales. But, you'll learn how to be a princess. Do you agree?” I want to work for Greenpeace when I leave school. If 1 pay them all that money, they'll have to give me a job! So L agreed. I’ll learn to be a princess. 331 didn’t reply. At that moment, I wanted to be at Lilly’s place. I didn’t want to see Mr Gianini having breakfast in our kitchen. He had spent the night at our place with my mom. | didn’t want to know this. “Frank missed his train home last night,” said my mom. “So Lasked him to spend the night here. He slept on the couch in the living room.” She was lying—I knew that. But I didn’t say anything. Late morning After breakfast, my mom and Mr Gianini went to Central Park. They asked me to go with them. But I didn’t go. I have lots of homework to do. That’s what I told them. Maybe they'll kiss each other. | didn’t want to see that. People kiss on TV and that’s OK. But my mom kissing my Algebra teacher? No! Afternoon I’ve just turned on my computer. I’ve got an e-mail from Michael Moscovitz. He’s going to help me with my extra Algebra. I can’t believe it! Wasn’t that nice of Michael? z A New Friend Sunday, October 12th. Late evening My dad called me after lunch. “T want you to come to the Plaza Hotel this evening. I want you to have dinner with me and Grandmere,” he said. “Pll send Lars to pick you up in the car.” 36When I told Mom, she looked happy. “That’s OK,” she said. “I’ll stay here. I'll order some food from my favorite Thai restaurant. I’ll watch TV.” Dinner at the Plaza was very boring. I couldn’t eat most of the food because it was meat. But I ate some fish, and some chocolate ice cream. Dad kept asking me questions about Mom and Mr Gianini. “Do you feel OK about your mom dating your Algebra teacher?” he asked. Why is my dad asking me this? My mom likes Mr Gianini—I know that. But does she love him? I don’t know. I didn’t tell my dad about Mr Gianini staying the night. When I got home, I saw two empty cartons of Thai food in the kitchen. “Was Mr Gianini here for dinner?” | asked my mom. “Oh, no,” she said quickly. “I was very hungry, so I ordered two meals.” My mom has told me two lies today about Mr Gianini. Lilly still hasn’t called. Monday, October 13th. Morning This morning, I asked Lars to stop the car at Lilly’s apartment building. I wanted her to ride to school with us. But she had already left her apartment. Afternoon 1 usually sit with Lilly in our school cafeteria at lunchtime. But today, a boy called Boris Pelkowski was sitting beside Lilly. He was sitting in the seat where I usually sit. Lilly likes Boris Pelkowski because he’s a great musician. Boris comes from Russia and he plays the violin. He also wears his clothes in a WEIRD way. 37I got a plate of salad and looked around. Most of the tables in the cafeteria were full of students. “Who can I sit with?” I thought. Tina Hakim Baba was sitting at one of the tables. No other students were sitting with her. Tina’s parents are very rich. Her father comes from Saudi Arabia and he owns an oil company. Tina’s parents are frightened of kidnappers. Mr and Mrs Hakim Baba don’t want kidnappers to take Tina. Kidnappers usually want lots of money before they release a person. People have been hurt or killed by their kidnappers. ‘Tina’s parents are very careful. They send her to school ina limousine with a bodyguard. The bodyguard follows Tina everywhere. All the other students call Tina a freak. ' Tina was reading a book and the bodyguard was sitting beside her. Tina had a plate of salad, just like me. But she hadn't chosen a salad because she’s a vegetarian. She’d chosen it because she’s a little heavy. She wants to lose weight. I walked over to her table and put my plate down. “Can I sit here?” [ asked. Tina looked up in surprise. She looked at me and then she looked at the bodyguard. The bodyguard nodded. Tina laid her book on the table and smiled. She has large brown eyes and a nice smile. “Yes,” she said. “Please sit with me.” Tina and I ate our salads and talked about school. There's going to be a dance at Albert Einstein on Saturday. I asked Tina if she had a date for the dance. “A boy from Trinity is taking me to the dance,” she replied. Trinity is a school for rich boys. I liked talking to Tina. She wasn’t a freak at all. She was really nice. When she got up to get a drink, | looked at the book beside her plate. Tina was reading a romantic novel called My Name is Amanda. 38Lana Weinberger walked over to the table. “What has happened to your hait, Mia?” she said loudly. “It’s a horrible yellow color.” Then Tina came back, holding an ice cream. She gave the ice cream to me. “Oh, Tina,” said Lana, “did you buy that ice cream for Mia? Did your daddy give you money to buy a new friend?” Tina was very hurt by Lana’s words and her eyes filled with tears. I felt very angry with Lana. Suddenly, I took the ice cream and pushed it onto Lana’s sweater. Everyone in the cafeteria stopped talking. They stared at us. “Look at what you’ve done!” Lana screamed. ]I stood up, and picked up my plate of salad. “Come on, Tina,” | said, “Let’s go somewhere quieter.” Tina picked up her salad and followed me. Her bodyguard followed too. He was laughing. Lilly Moscovitz was staring at me, Her mouth was open with shock. Late afternoon Tm in a lot of trouble. I’m sitting in Principal Gupta’s office. Principal Gupta is the head of the school. I was sent here because I pushed ice cream into Lana Weinberger’s sweater. I’m worried. What’s going to happen? Evening Principal Gupta has punished me. She has given me a week’s detention. Every day next week, I have to stay for an hour after school, and do extra work. | also have to do my extra Algebra every day with Mr Gianini, and the princess classes with Grandmere. “Lana's sweater has to be cleaned and you must pay,” said Principal Gupta. “And you must apologize to her.” “[m sorry, Principal Gupta,” I said, “I'll pay for Lana’s sweater to be cleaned. But I won’t apologize to her.” 2 Principal Gupta was surprised, but she wasn’t angry with me. “Mia,” she said quietly, “I’m worried. You've never been in trouble before. Is. . .is everything all tight? Do you have any problems at home?” I thought about all my problems. My mom is dating my Algebra 40