Prologue

I knew this day would come but never thought it will be this soon and even worse to happen like this, I
struggle with my feminine side so much that , the man who calls himself my father feels the need to
change me, Control or try and make me what he thinks is the right daughter , So what if I'm a girl, but I
act like a guy, What's wrong with that , I grew up with boys and frankly i liked the way i turned out to be
, am I comfortable with who I am? fuck yes and I don't see nothing bloody wrong with me , my
perception about life is that Women are not required to be dainty wilting flowers and Men are not
required to be Herculean pillars of strength , Frankly, I don’t even care what you mean by “you act like a
guy”. To me that context it's just irrelevant ,

Throughout my life I have constantly set goals for myself , both in the long- and short-term , Plans of
being successful , Independent to enjoy the finer things in life and mostly to run away from home , Free
from my name , my blood and my status .

yep plans are great because they helped me make decisions about what to do, or not do, in order to
help me achieve my goals but oh well Like any plan though, unexpected changes can occur that either
help or hinder your life goal achievement … I looked at the two people that call themselves my parents
as they talk and making me understand the worst decisions they just took for my life " my life ",

I look down and bit my lower lip suppressive the anger I'm feeling right now , i wanted to look up but
that will be a huge sign of disrespect in my father's eyes , I was perplexed for moment there , i had them
talking but my thought were to loud to hear a dahm thing ,

" please don't cry ... Please don't cry " I keep telling my already shaking body , the lump on my trough ,
my eyes burning and stinging by the tears that want to escape , I did not believe that my parents are
considering selling me to a another family in order for them to survive and keep there standards in the
community funny enough on how they sold most of there cows in order for my two brother to go to
varsity and when I'm about to finish school no cows were sold for me to continue my studies in
university but my father has been doing lot of negotiating with other royal house in order for my father
to get his cows back .

Yet now he seat in his throne and he decided to tell me that he is so proud of a young women I turned
out to be ,yah right as if I should believe that , the man can not stand my guts , from the way I dress the
way I talk, the way i carry my self , he finds that I'm an embarrassment to the royal family , tainting his
image he said , the hell I care its my life at the end of the day ,

we coexist in the same house because of this blood that runs inside of me that makes me the Golden
child , i try my level best to avoid him , the sad truth is that i hate him too.

i understand that right now he want to get under my skin, He want me to feel mad he want me to lash
out about this matter . yes I'm very opinionated person , my mouth is power , not only my brains work
over time in processing situation but when I speak , I make sure my view point in head loud and clear ,
but in this household a women voice is silenced ... I was still confused about all of what he saying to me ,
is it happening now or is he telling me that I must prepare my self for this ?

him: I know your Education means a lot to your mother.... " wait what ? I smiled as I felt a tingle of
excited worming my bleeding heart is he about to say what I think he is about to say ? Has he
reconsidered sending me to university?

" please lord , let him say it please " I crossed my fingers and held my breath

he continued to give me praise that he is glad that I can cook and clean and handle all household chores
... Yayay what ever get to the point I said inside

, I did not know what he was going with this but I guess its another way he was showing his
appreciation off all the work I have done as girl child in this house , i may have been an arrogant brat in
his eyes , who acts like a boy but i know the power of respect i chose to be civil around him and played
buy the rules , I hope my plan worked in manipulating and blind sighting him in order to get what I want
" ooh God let it be"

My cheeks became wet , my throat so dry I felt it crack, I couldn't believe my ears when he said

"Ungasiphoxi emzini yezwa , your in-law agreed to further your studies "

I looked up with my eyes red no sound in my mouth that I'm crying but tears falling down , the pain
came back , I saw the devil in his eyes ,

I knew that being summoned to come home was either going to make me or break me , I'm only 17th ,
never had a boyfriend , was locked up in boarding school , that was more like a maximum prison for
girls , no social network , no TV , no social life , just books and church , and when I come back home I'm
told that I will be sold to a man !. They don't even wait till I finish writing my matric exams that are in
two months time and they dropped this bomb on me !!! .

I sniffed the pain was to much , I'm strong yes but this was way to big for my shoulders, I never expected
what he said next , I felt my soul leaving my body for few minutes and my trout was getting dry i could
not breath and I felt like screaming so loud that my lungs bust out , if I’m not mistaken this were his
exact words

“ Sibahle we have accepted the Mnguni cows for your hand in marriage ... "

He shifted in his seat as my eyes looked directly in his eyes ...

Me : ma !.... Why ? " It was a direct question then pleading with her
I looked at my mother she was just looking like a zombie looking in to space, I wish she could say
something or maybe try and wake me up from this awful dream that I was in , but why ? why would they
throw me out to the dogs like that ... I'm turning 18 next month and I'm already engaged to be married
...worst part it's an arranged marriage ??? ... The waterfall gushed down I stood up held my mouth , took
a last look at him , wiped my face with the back of my hand

Me : He who is silent and bows his head dies every time he does so. He who speaks aloud and walks
with his head held high dies only once. – Is there anything else baba ? "

My stare did not leave his eyes , he swallows hard , is that sweat drops on his forehead the pig had fear
written all over him , they called it punishment to send me to the harshest school ever but they in fact in
powdered me I Never let anyone tell me who i am , what I must do , I'm Princess Sibahle Bhengu and

Keeping my head up is a matter of honor and pride to me I know who I am and i will defend myself and
walk my own path, no matter which routes others might force me on I know that the world has respect
for confident people.

Him : no , you may be excused " he said softly

I turned away with my heart beating abnormally fast, I stopped as I heard my mom soft voice

Her :"Sibahle Bhengu .. You are the chosen Queen never forget that "

I breath out loud as I rushed to my room to take off this hideous dress jumped into my jeans and vest ,
put my cap on and walked out I had to think , draw up a new plan all know is Good and evil, darkness
and light, and failure and success are the dualities that make life so interesting and spicy. After dark,
there is nowhere else to go than straight towards the light. After failure, there is nowhere to go but up.

I’m Princes Sibahle Bhengu …. Walk with me on my pursuit of Happiness

You know what to do :

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chapter 1

unedited

Sibahle ...

It's been few days after the negations , if I was willing happy bride to be I would have said that
everything went well and it was success but hell NO I’m not , one thing I picked up about my so cold in-
laws is that they are rich .. too rich in fact there cars , the way they dressed , there cologne and I don’t
want to talk about their accent , it like they grew up overseas or something … I was getting petrified just
by sitting in front of them I’m definitely not fit in , in that family the strange part is that we all know
that Lobolo negotiations is black people thing , but in my negotiation I had a white guy representing my
husband “ iyoooh thatha Sibahle “ , that got me laughing and made me forget the awkward moment I
was in , jotting to that day it made me realise that this shit is real , I’m officially somebody wife , I looked
down and played with my fingers, I may be brave and outspoken but deep down I’m terrified little girl I
walked around the yard just thinking about how my life would have been like if I was not royalty ,I
suddenly had a rush back to memory lane ,

“ keep your eyes on the clay pot my child let it move in you hand feel the rhythm, feel the Ceramics is
the art , to scalp you must close your eyes and sing. … art is love , art is a song, art is feeling of peace“
he said walking pass me after brushing my hair back with his hands, I smiled hummed a song ,the loud
band , breaking of glasses and things falling down alarmed me made me jump as I rushed to the other
room and found my father laying down , I wasn’t with my father when he died yes we might have been
in the same place but he fell and died in another room . I wasn’t there to observe what happened, to
see exactly how he fell or what object his head hit on the way down his last words he said to me ring in
my ear I then forgot how to breathe , I felt like was being pulled underwater ,I remember as it was
yesterday when my mother cried for help when she struggled to lift a 12-year-old chubby girl up
screaming and kicking on top her fathers dead body , I felt like Someone has put a mask over my face , I
taste the sweetness of the oxygen, like tasting dry soil, I felt my blood heating up i suddenly have a 107-
degree fever my body is getting hot and cold at the same time

“ Bahle breath my baby “ I felt her hands on my shoulder , she then turned me around and gave me a
tight hug , I could not help the tears that washed over my cheeks

" its going to be OK Bby " she said brushing my back I have been gone for 6 years and coming back home
and looking at my father art gallery that my mother has turned into a green room made me relive that
day when I last saw my father alive .

Me : “ it hurts so much maka’ Sbahle “

Her : “ I know baby , I know … “ she wiped the tears from my face I faked a smile and as she held my
hand and we walk around the yard , she held my hand tighter then normal , ever since they dropped
the bomb on me about me being someone’s arranged wife she has been acting very strange , she
scared she does not want to let go of me , she feel like I’m the only thing that reminds her of my father .
yes I might have kept her up all night last night ,with nightmares that still tormenting me when I’m in
this place , it happened 6 years ago but I still relive it as if its happening today.

Her : his in a better place my baby and his looking down on us "

I frown and pulled my hand away from her ,

Me : njani ma ? "

Her :Sbahle please mntanami "

I looked at her this is one thing I have told and taught myself that I will never be like my mother she is
too soft and fragile to me that just being weak . I huffed and looked away took a stone I threw it in the
air out of frustration, she sigh.

Her : I'm glad you home " I rolled my eyes because im not , I hate being here and surrounded by
memories that I’m trying to suppress

Me : stop patronising me ma "

Her : kodwa... "

Me : I don't want to hear it ma! " I screamed a bit , this was my biggest problem my temper ,

Have you ever encountered someone who wears their anger on their sleeve? Or someone who gets mad
too quickly or easily? That me I'm hot headed , as I grew up it became worse , mostly it's enger that I
curry within , Anger is a more powerful emotion than sadness, through the lens of the hotheads Hence
this is why i rather speak loudly than cry when angered. I have perceive crying as exposing one's
vulnerability, or weakness Unfortunately, this has caused more harm than good to my mother life.

Me : “ I’m only 17 mom , why you allowing this man to sell like I’m an item “

Mom: I'm sorry I did not know it will happen so soon … but its our way of life my child , if you of royal
blood you do not marry for love , but to build a kingdom , a legacy and strengthen the two royal blood “

I looked at her and wondered if this woman really loves me , because ever since he married this man
she became mute

Her : i know i have not been the greatest parent ever but looking at the young women you turned out
to be I’m so proud of you right ? “

She said that looking straight into my eyes , I could not help but to see that the light in her eyes was
stolen by the sadness in her heart ,

it all happened 6 years ago when I lost my hero and she lost the love of her life we walk around like
zombies that hunger for one thing , to be loved and to be happy ,they say Happiness is an addiction and
if you have experienced it then you are hooked , Happiness is an addiction because our monkey mind
convinces us that we are not okay if we don’t get our fix of it .. My sadness turned me to be This super
impulsive and irrational person yes when looking at my life I have figured that Our attempts to be happy
are not the problem The problem is that we are not aware of a workable alternative to happiness.

Mom : “ you are a women now , and I know you can be… in fact you are stronger than I will ever be , No
one knows what you have been through or what your pretty little eyes have seen, but I can reassure you
,whatever you have conquered, it shines through your mind...courage and an ability to stand up for
yourself "

She embrace me with a hug , it moments like this that make me feel at peace funny how it never last .
the sound of the car engine broke the slightest piece of happiness in my life.

“Sibahle … I'm the only man in this house the last time i checked , hambo khumula lowomhlola
owuqokile !!" He road making my mother flinch , I felt anger raging inside of me I looked at the man
that took away the only thing that makes a house to“ a home “ a family “ to warm fuzzy feeling “ he
made it to a cold cave with no life

Mom : “ hurry up Sbahle … don’t make your father angry “

I looked at my mother , with frowned eyebrows , scrambling like a han about to lay an egg , what power
does this man have over her ?

Me : “ he will never be my Father ... The sooner you get that in your head the better !! " she held her
mouth

Him : uthin?!!! "

Mom pleaded with me not to challenge him , the only thing I struggle to control is my temper and right
now I wanted to scream , brake something or kill someone …

Mom : come Sisi let me help you to change " my mom , pulled my hand but her husband called her , I
still do not see why wearing Pants In my fathers house is an issue I cliqued my tongue and walked to the
house and made my way to the kitchen our house keeper was cooking she smiled at me but I was not
in that mood , the happy girl in me was taken the day I saw my father’s lifeless body , the smile in me
was taken when my mother was forced to marry my father's younger brother, You may say that I’m
royalty and this was my destiny my mother was Queen and she was never going to rule the kingdom
alone she needed the head of the family a leader and by culture it done for the good of the family for
the people… for the royal house . All that Gilts you see in this royal house is not Gold trust me I'm
princess by blood nothing special about me ,my uncle is an abusive , power hungry , malicious monster
… he envied my father he wanted my father inheritance , his wife , his life and his family. Death made
him get it all , I then became his golden egg that will make him more powerful and wealthy no wonder
I was sold to the highest bidder and it doesn’t help that I took my mother beauty, I looked at myself in
the mirror and ran hands on my thick black long hair ,

“ Nkosazana , your father is calling you “ one of the help said , I sign and put on my dress, my long dress
ugly dress I dragged my feet to the throne room and saw my mother sited on the grass mat next to the
chair where he set with his pot bally sticking out , I felt his smirk burning in my head as I sat down on
the center of the room on the grass mat , I hate coming to this room because I know whatever he's
going to say is going to piss me off even more , damn I hate this man

“ thank you Princess for gracing us with your presence , “ that sounded so sarcastic , I cringed to him
calling me Princess

“ chin up and smile sunshine, soon this attitude of yours will be tamed when I give your hand away to
your husband “

He laughed , making my blood boil in the process , I did not dare answer him I looked at my mother she
was just looking down , I wanted to jump up to him and beat him up but I knew better because mom
pays for my arrogance, When I talk back at him, when I disrespect him my mother will pay the price , he
never lays a hand on his brother children , but my mother will be kicked , punched and slapped for my
wrong doing... I suddenly I felt my body sinking , my heart was beating on my trough he was busy
talking,

Him : yazi funny thing is I don't know how or when they found out about your existence but they have
paid a fortune for you " so since the negotiations are over your mother here has asked me that we do
memulo for you “

I looked at him , oh God no , I can not parade half naked in front people , I popped my eyes

Me : “ I got exams to write “ I’m not doing this hell no!

Him : well my child I was not asking you I’m telling you umemulo will be conducted after your exams ,
so go pack so that the driver will take you back to school to prep for exams “ I looked at him with so
much hatred written all over me ,

Me : “ I hope you study hard and pass your exams with distinction , your in-laws are very educated and
speak different English don’t think about embarrass me… uyezwa !!!! “

to be continued

chapter 2

unedited

Sli***

I pictured my reunion with Trey to be the best unforgettable day of my life, in my head I picture slow
motion runs to each other arms , kissing and locking each in his bedroom making love and rekindling our
love , he will tell me he loves me and will pick up from where we left off , will raise our kid together and
start a family.

Yeh right dream on Slindile , Fairy-tale never happens for people like me , I was on his study and he was
just shouting and pointing fingers at me calling me all sort of names for keeping the existence of his
baby from him

Him : you robbed me three years of my daughters life ...three years slindile !!!! what were you
thinking??? "

Me : I'm sorry "

Him : fuck saying that you Sorry !!!"

Me : “ I tried so many times to call you “

Him : “ and you never talk… were you even going to tell me about my baby if you grandfather did not
drag you here ? “

Me : “ of cause I was going to tell you … “

He did the mocking laugh and that alone made the hair at the back of my neck stand , who's this man in
front of me , he is not the boy I fell in love with , he is now dominant , with deep bold voice that will
make any crowd stop talking , he has this aura of commanding respect without saying nothing , I felt
very afraid ,

it was not helping that I felt like an ant in front of this big beast

Him : why ?" he said almost as whisper , he may be mad at me but when our eyes lock it ignite that
spark we once had , I breath out loud and narrated a story about how I found out I was pregnant and
how I tried to call him but could not find the right words to say
Him : “ Sli you know for a fact that I have no family … and you keep the only link that I have to my blood
line ? “

Me : “ Trey you had school … I could not just drop a baby in your lap , I had to consider all expect before
I showed up with … “

Him : “ Damit Sli !!… fuck that she is my child , I would have done anything for her … if I remember it
correctly I was the one that fucked you so hard and you left with my seed that you were trying keep
away from me … “

Me : “ im so sorry “ I tried telling him about this destiny thing I was forced to do , his temper went from
zero to hundred , I was a crying mess , did he care at all no , but he roughly shook me and made me look
on his eyes ,

Him : " you know first hand how I feel about you , and you turn around and hurt me like this? I

wish I could give you my pain just for one moment. Not to hurt you, but so that you could finally
understand how much you hurt me ....you found out about me and who I am but still chose to keep this
secrete , "

Me : Trey please believe me I had no control of this , I have seen and done things that are
unexplainable to the naked eye , for us to meet it was destiny , for us to part it was for us to find our
own path, sad part is that I was carrying your seed and the forces of life or universe made us drift, my
destiny and purpose was not fulfilled when I gave birth , even queen mother saw this and told me as
well when I came here for a women’s conference "_ he crunched down holding his mouth , he does this
a lot this days I guess his legs struggle to hold him up

Him : “ ooh my God it was you .. “

I swallowed and walked close to him , I told him about the airport incident and he just held his chest ,

Me : “ I never stopped looking for you , even hired a private investigator till I almost lost Nola when she
told me who you are and where you are , I had to listen to divinity … “
Him :... Koko knew about my baby ?"

I just nodded , he attempted to walk out but i held his arm ,

Me : " please Trey not like this ,... It was not by choose that we kept this from you , there were other
forces involves you are a man who believe in such things why you finding it hard to believe what I'm
saying to you ...please this situation hurt me more then as it hurting you right now that why I decided to
tell Zethelo about you, showed her your pictures make her understand that one day you will reunite
with her ... She's gifted child Trey she is her father's daughter "

He looked at me with his sparkling eyes oh God that look ...I wish I could say that in your eyes I see the
light of passion; I can hear the songs of your heart for me. I cannot live without you because you belong
to me. And I will never let you down because I love you so much. I will hold you tight because I’ll always
love you no matter what.

Him : days i could handle but night were the worse , I try to not to miss you , I try to let go but in the end
you're always on my mind, Sometimes I just wish you were here so I could tell you how much I need you
and how hard every day has been without you but you were to much of coward to stay ... To keep in
touch to allow the fire to continue to burn , you walk away from me sli..."

Me : I had to ... But I never stop loving you Trey please believe me I am giving you my words that I will
never betray you for any reason. I am so much in love with that I can no longer think straight.....i know
what i did was wrong but it was not my intension to hurt you … “ I tried to walk close to him but he
stopped me

Me : " Please don't ..I don't want to hear it. You hurt me more than I deserve, how can you be so cruel?
I love you more than you deserve( he shook his head ) why am I such a fool? "

his look changed he became angry his eyes gave me shivers , I felt my heart beating on the center of
my chest , he than looked at my hand that was still holding him ,

Him : I need to think ... Let go of me "

Me : but Trey " .The brittle bones beneath my chest cracked, piercing my heart I looked at the man
before me It was him who breathed new life into my lungs and it was him who would later destroy the
life he had given " the waterfall gushed down ,

Him : hayi Silindile just shut it ... No amount of sorry will undo what you did … I just need to breath .. "

he clicked his tongue and walked out he was mad at me I could hold it any longer so I just let it all out

oh lord what have I done , Nola found me crying on the corner of room with my head buried on my
knees ,

Her : come love ..."

Me ; he hates me "

Her : his hurt , give him time , come sweet heart ..." I wiped my face and fixing my dress , we walked to
one of the guest bedrooms I was just walking Zombie ,Nola handed me pills and made me sleep after
telling me that Trey took Zee and drove off , I woke up it was the following morning with a banging
headache I took long shower , after dressing up I just set on my bed and recalled yesterdays event , I
wanted to leave this place but was to afraid ... I could not look Trey in the eye, there was a nock on the
door and i held my breath and before I could say come in Veli walk in she ran to me and hugged me

Veli : I knew it ... I just didn't know how to ask you about you and Ngonyama but I knew that Zee was
Mnguni I felt it when she touched me or when she told me about her dreams "

I just smiled with tears on my eyes

Her : ncoo sli please don't cry ,

Me : I'm sorry I lied to you "

Her : you had your reasons sli I fully understand ... How are you ? "
I wiped my teas as she held my hand

Me : I feel so lost ... Hurt and I don't know how to speak to Trey , he is so mad and the things he said to
me ... Oh veli he hates me "

She shook her head

Her : all the years I've know Ngonyama he has shown me nothing but kindness he is a good man , he
may be hurt but he will come around... "

I just nodded , Nola walk with Zee, my smile keeper , she ran to me and I hugged her so tight

" morning onion " I laughed with tears in my eyes, I felt her tiny hands wiping my teas

Her : why you crying mom are you happy to see daddy too? " I just nodded

She just hugged me and told me about her evening with her father , that alone wormed my heart , I had
no doubt that Trey will be a good father it only been one day with his daughter , but already Zee is
bragging , they must have had fun because after telling about her night , she ran off leaving me with a
wide smile on my face

Nola : I have never seen her this happy oh my "

I felt a slight guilt that I was the reason why Zee is only founding out about his dad now, I just looked
down ,

Nola : how you holding up "

Like a person who's watching there heart slowly butchered, I didn't have it in me to respond
Nola :well look on the bright side the worst is over " i looked at her and frowned,

I looked at

Nola smiled with her phone and punched the air in excitement

Me: what ?"

Nola : your dress for the throne gala tonight is ready ... Will go pick it up later "

Me : I don't think I can show face "

Nola : tough luck because the queen mother wants you to join her for breakfast " she looked at her
wrist watch " and if we do not leave this room will be late "

I pooped my eyes No

Veli smiled " I'll come with you. Trust me she’s the most worm hearted person I know " she hooked her
arm over mine

Her : why am I even telling you this because you know her " she laughed as Nola hooked her arm on my
other free arm

Nola ; yap that's true , so come on “

I faked a smiled stood up as we walk out , I meet up with Austin and Mzamo by the lobby ,

we greeted them

Austin : oh morning lady's morning sly " I just shook my head and nudge Nola
Mzamo just nodded , Trey walked in sweating he was wearing basketball shorts ..mmm shorts never
looked good on any man like they do on him , he had no top on , my eyes ran down from his toned ebbs
to the v- line on his short , I'm staring oh God he can see that I'm drivelling over him , it was not helping
because Nola was mumbling ' mmm his sooooo hot "

Him : morning " I looked up our eyes locked and he had this morning glow his JBL headphones dangling
on his neck

Me : hi "

“ daddy " Zee screamed braking the awkward moment , he picked her up and she giggle it was beautiful
site to watch he walked pass me talking with Zee in his arm ,oh how I wish he would just hold me

To be continued....

chapter 3

Sbahle

A month later ***

We were all shipped to boarding school because to my Uncle we were considered busted child , my
father had four kids , two boys and two girls Thandiwe 30, Nsika 25 ...Mlondi 21 and me , my birthday is
coming up and they decided to do memulo for me , I'll be seeing my brother for the 1st time in 6 years ,
I’m not sure about my older sister the family he married to are too cultural and ever since she married
there she has not visited home for years , only saw her on my father funeral she looked beautiful and
even though her husband is old she looked happy , I should be happy and looking forward to seeing my
sibling but to me its bitter sweet moment, as much as leaving conditions at home got worse by the day
my big brothers left for school and never returned back home ,They disowned them self from family ,
and leaving me and mom behind , I had to grow up very fast and i tried to protect our mother , but
there so much a child could do , till the busted decided to send me to this prison I’m in ,I still play the
day in my head when my mother cried tried to commit suicide when her in-laws ( my father side ) told
her that its culture for a brother to marry his late brother's wife , I have never experienced abused from
my uncle all I know is that I see how oppressed my mother's life is... She is abused physically , verbal
And emotional ,

".don't worry about me my child I do what I have to do for you to survive ...this too shall pass "

She will say with a bruised face and faith smile. as much as my Uncle never laid a hand on me ,

I know that he hates me … and I could not shake the feeling that he had a hand in my father dearth ,
What I knew was what the death certificate said: cause of death: Subdural Hematoma, due to (or as a
consequence of) traumatic closed head injury , The death certificate also said that it took my father only
a few minutes to die while that same day he drank imported expensive whisky that his brother sent to
him , …

" Sbahle come on stop doing this to yourself " that my roommate , if I could talk under water I will say
leave me alone , she was telling me to open the door and banging the bathroom door , I sigh and
continued to hold my breath drowning myself on my bathtub has been my only stress releasing
mechanism , shit I miss my father , my brothers, I miss home , or what it used to be , ever since I
returned back to school i have been feeling sick not health wise but emotionally I was dying , I have
anxiety fevers at night , shivering thoughts through the day , sleeping with night mares , my study
session web of emotion battles I will find myself sinking and it does not help that I’m a person who
keeps to myself , suddenly the world became to noisy There is no question that this is the way I will feel
forever am I also subjected to leave and walk In my mother's shoes as well ? will history repeat itself
through the lens of my arranged marriage ? my temperature started to changing , my body heated up
again , there is no cure after the fever moments , I’m done convincing myself that I'm going to be ok
because the fever is my world

" this too shall pass " my mother words ringed in my ear , ...I wish there was a nicer way to say this, but
I don’t always want to be alive , right now, I don’t actively want to kill myself I don’t have a plan, I don’t
have check lists of warning signs of suicide, I have a life to enjoy and I’m curious about the future but
the fact remains, I don’t always feel strongly about being alive and sometimes, on particularly bad days, I
truly want to die. For me the feeling of being under water, of not breathing …it like being carried over a
waterfall — it is like living in the ocean. Not as sea creatures do, but i wish to be one as water Some days
are unremarkable, floating under clear skies and smooth waters , other days are tumultuous storms and
I feel like I don’t know how to survive, but i'm always one with the water, my body and mind becomes
one with water its beautiful feeling to stay afloat, i eventually get the feeling that one day, inevitably
there will be nowhere for me to go but down. but I don’t want it to be soon For now, I can and i want to
keep my head above water. But i ask myself will I have control on other day is my will to breath
enough? I rose up from the water and breath out loud nostrils burning , banging head , chest hurting , I
gasped for air till my breathing became normal

, I stepped out wrapped a towel around my wet body, I unlock the bathroom door I found my roommate
seating on the floor resting her head on the bathroom door she stood up
Her : Sbahle ?". I looked

" what's up with that look ?" She just hugged me , I pushed her off

" Zim yini manje "

She sigh and rolled her eyes , I'm a non - hugger , I hate physical contact and trust me this has made me
very awkward to society

I have realise that when a person hate being hugged, the world can be a challenging place. You never
know when someone you’re meeting for a quick coffee, study Buddy will approach you arms open wide,
coming in for an embrace i froze most of the time with my options that just become limited , my mind
will start flagging every expect of this and my body cringe i can awkwardly dodge the gesture by stick
out my hand for a handshake, or submit to faking a sneeze or caught

Her : I'm worried about you"

Me : I'm good Zim'khithi "

Her : you not… you doing it again !"

Me : can you just stop ..."

Her : no Sbahle … Near-drowning is not healthy and it will increase chances of brain damage "

Me : it helps me think "

Her : you over doing babe you holding your breath far too long , you’re unable to breathe underwater
for a significant period of time look how dilated your eyes are ? “

Ooh good not this again I appreciate the consent but it my life after all

Me : “ I know what i'm doing … stop bugging me , I pushed her aside

Her : you know that During near-drowning, your body is cut off from oxygen to the point where major
body systems can begin to shut down from the lack of oxygen flow. "

Me : I know....Dr "

She breath out loud in frustration

" sbahle please talk to me or to someone you carry to much weight ever since you came back I don't
recognise the person you are now "

Me :why you not in the dining hall ? "_

Her : " ooh yini wethu why solokhu dodge the topic... You my best friend China and I will not seat and
watch you take your life !!"

Me : “ I’m ok babe yeva “

this friend of my here is loud we have been roommates for 5 Years now since grade 8_she is Xhosa and
I'm Zulu , she is locked up in this prison like me , her sentence is different from mine though , she in here
for being too forward , let's just say she is a she dog , never meet a 17 year old who has lost count in the
man she has slept with... She fucks for fun and not for love, on the other hand i don’t even know how to
kiss a guy , but we get along pretty fine ,one thing I love about her is that she is a smart bitch , ambitious
and focus .

Me : are you getting me food or what ? "

Her : its not like you will eat it “

Me: just go Zim … “

I just looked at her and she dragged her big ass out leaving me to finish lotioning my body , I put on my
PJ and took my books as was about to study Zim walked in

with our food , I took meat and rostered potato from my plate and left the rest for her , she loves food
no doubt she will finish two plates

Her : so finally we writing our final paper tomorrow “

Me : yah " I said with a law voice ,

Zim" ooh come on love....at least now you going to varsity"

Me : and I wanted to skip the country or province , you forgetting that I'll be somebody's wife which
means I'm going to be stuck in his house God knows doing what...,who knows maybe he will be
demanding sex and baby’s from me , honestly I feel like dying "

Her : have you considered going for plan B... Kill him on your wedding night take his money and skip
the country "

Me : " I'll go with plan A and just kill my stepfather in his sleep " we looked at each other and we bust
out and laughed

weeks later ... to be continued

you know what to do

chapter 4

unedited ... ( took me the whole night to type )

.
Trey *** (Narrated )

It's been a whole month and Trey still could not get over the fact that he has a child and she is a spitting
image of him , the women he loves is the one that made him a father ,he spend weeks with Zee bonding
and doing all things that a parent wish to do with a child, he realised that Fathers are not born , Men
grow into fathers and fathering is a very important stage in their development. Trey took this serious he
prayed for his daughter and went an extra mile to protect her , he asked the lord to forgive him for all
the wrongs he has done over the years treating women badly , a girl child can change any man
perspective on how he view women worth ,he will never wish his own daughter to go through what he
did to the women in his life , asking God to forgive him was his only hope that karma must not come
knocking on his door .

Trey took pride in playing the dad part in Zee life as much as he hated that he never felt her kick while
she was still in her mothers womb ,never heard her when she cried for the first time , never saw her
when she Took her first step or heard her first word she said, it sadden him that he lost Three years of
her daughter's life , worse part he is still alive and would have taken responsibility of his child.

That why he just wanted his days to revolve around Zee he loved the name that Sli gave his daughter
she is definitely the fruit of his life , Zithelo Zemvelo , he is still puzzled that he has learned so much
about taking care of child in a short period time , bath time , nap times , platy time , talk / dance and
laugh time , oh not forgetting to watch cartoons with her , he has learned about Zee elegies , what she
likes to ware , he still struggled to her hair its big thick afro , but very soft he likes to play with it and the
rich red colour makes her even more beautiful , he smiled thinking that The nature of impending
fatherhood is that you are doing something that you’re unqualified to do, and then you become
qualified while doing it.

Parting ways was the hardest part he had to do , he had school and final exams to write to get his
degree and run his company , he now had purpose in life ..

he was back in the UK finishing up his exams his mind could not get destructed by anything now , he
knew that he has someone who looks up to him now and he was a proud father he took out his phone
and dialed Nola number

Her : hello "

Him : hi Nola ...may i please speak to Zithelo "

Nola rolled her eyes, she was still mad at Trey for not forgiving Sli , she spend weeks crying over him,
but the guy rather spend days with his daughter , taking Zee to Disneyland was wow! but somehow a
nail in the heart for sli since she was not asked to tag along , and when his family introduced Zee to the
encestores and changed her surname sli died a million dearth , the only person they acknowledged in
that royal house was Trey seed and sli felt like a surrogate mother , depression hit her even more when
Trey said that next year his taking Zee to leave with him .. Nola started hating the Mnguni's even more
its true what they say that people with power believes that things must be done there way or the
highway.

On the other hand Pam hates Sli and did not even hide it , in her eyes Sli was older and was not suppose
to get in sack with Trey in first place yet alone curry a baby by him , Nola blames herself now for fighting
and pestering Sli to tell Trey about Zee everything just went sideways after the truth was revealed ,
Nola now understood why Sli kept telling her that her relationship with Trey was complicated , age
difference , her being a widow , and now she a mother of his child ... Yes she loves him but if the Media
get hold of sli past Trey’s image and hers will be tainted.

Nola : wow ! ...you not even going to ask me on how I'm doing ?? "

Trey sigh this was hard , he was never ready to coparent , he is not even experience on how to juggle his
life and being a single parent , the family loves his daughter but Sli on the other hand they may pretend
to like her but there red flags with him dating or pursuing a relationship with her, he decided to place
his feeling on hold for her as hard as it is he just don't want to complicate things. Besides he is soon to
marry someone next month , he can't hurt sli like that , she was once a victims of cheating husband , it's
just too complicated for him now.

" let the dust set and make the right decision " Austin advised him and he doing just that now

trey : I'm sorry about that ... How are ..." she did not allow him to finish

"_

Nola : "Zeee your dad is on the line ,,!!!!!" she screamed in Trey ear , he just ran his hands on his face

" daddy ... " zee giggled on the receiver , that alone melted his heart

" hay pumpkin ... How was your day " she giggle and told him about her day, Play mate what she ate ,
the cute cloths she has on, she started going on about some cartoons characters got trey smiling from
ear to ear ,

" when are you coming back daddy "

" soon pumpkin soon , "

" I love you daddy ... "

" I love you too , "

Silence on both ends , Trey looked at his phone and it was still counting

Trey : I love you so much " that got zee giggling again " bye daddy aunt says I must go bath promise to
read me bedtime story "

" its a date princes OK go bath will talk later " they kissed on the phone

There was shuffling going on and Nola answered

Trey ; thank you , please text me before she sleep "

Nola : I know Trey I will ... "

Him : thank you ... "

Her : Sli will be live on her page today '

Him: ooh "

Her : you should tune in "

Trey has never seen sli work , she has had people say she is changing lives but never had chance to
actually see it , after saying goodbye to Nola he pulled out his laptop and type in a link , he was shock by
the numbers of followers she has , comments were mind blowing a notification popped in , sli was live
he clicked on it and looked at how Polish , and good looking she was, high waist formal white slacks ,
black bodysuit , matching white coat black stilettos always made her tall and she looked gorgeous , Trey
found himself running his hands on the screen and she watched Sli talking and walking around the stage
with mic , he decide to increase the volume when she took off her coat and the crowd was standing up
and clapping

Sli sermon****

" we have that negative thought that destroy our courage … dreams and ambitions , we so scared to
open that curtain of believing in yourself and saying I can do it and I will … i'm not intimidated by the
fear of the unknown … and we end up crawling to that dark corner of doubt we even go down on our
knees and pray and say ooh God please give me strength .. please give courage to apply for that
management position … give me heart to lead … give me an ability to work hard and get that fat pay
cheque … make me good enough for him to see my worth and marry me .....make me more pretty or
handsome … I will die poor what’s the use in fighting …

haybo Listen here one thing I have realized is that it all start with you … You cannot believe in God until
you believe in yourself” Let me explain why i say this after lots of contemplating, this rings true for me. (
she laughed and shook her head )

When I first read this quote, I brushed it off. Certainly that couldn’t be true, and I didn’t want to spend
any more time thinking about it. However, as the day went on that statement followed me. It showed
up everywhere, so I thought maybe I need to take a closer look at it

Let’s unpack this, starting right from the beginning. In Genesis it tells us that we were created in the
image of God. God breathed life into us. His breath flows inside of us. Therefore, God is the source of life
from within. He is inside of you, around you — everywhere.

If this is the case, when you reject yourself, hate on yourself or do even worse, you are doing the same
to God because He is the source from within, and your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit (1
Corinthians 6:19). Everything you are holding against yourself on a core level, whether it is through
words or actions, you are also holding against God.
By questioning who we truly are, we are questioning who God is.... Maybe you believe you were created
by chance, and if that were true that would also mean you don’t have a unique purpose. That would
leave you struggling in life, not just physically but also emotionally and spiritually — which again, would
lead you to not truly believing in yourself. What is there to believe in, if we run around like zombies
without a purpose? We start to feel hopeless and a thought sneaks in that indicates that surely there
can’t be a God if that is how I feel because it doesn’t feel good.

When we don’t trust ourselves, we also don’t trust God. Our human self is restored through Christ yet
we tend to not want to accept it on a deep spiritual level. From experience, we tend to be suspicious
about everything that may be good. Listen here If it sounds too good, it probably is.

Many of us, myself included, merely acknowledge the existence of God. But do we fully and whole-
heartedly experience faith? There is a difference between knowledge and faith. …Faith means to let go
of what we think we can and should control, but we are afraid to let go because we would lose ourselves
and We can’t risk that What we become familiar with, we become comfortable with and even when it is
not in our best interest, it feels safe so we hold onto it. Trying to be in control of our lives means we
don’t trust Divine guidance I know I have been there I have questioned my existence my purpose...

As human beings we will never be perfect, but with this understanding it makes it easier to accept and
live our calling and purpose for a greater good. When you believe in yourself in an honoring way, you
are honoring what God has created, and therefore, God himself. The less you believe in yourself, the
more separated you are spiritually from God.

With everything said, my understanding is that the statement of, “You can not believe in God until you
believe in yourself,” goes hand in hand with, “You can not believe in yourself until you believe in God.”
One builds on top of the other. "

end of sermon people were screaming some were crying , some shouting " amen " " we love you Sli"
"We receive " God bless you" everyone one was on there feet the crowd Cheering as sli bowd and
placed her hand together as if she is praying and said thank you , she blew few kisses as she was ushered
to the back stage

In the UK

Trey mouth was on the floor , shock … disbelief on what he just saw… he knew and felt that sli was
ordained for greater things in life , he felt that Sli was not .just an ordinary women she was highly
favoured that why she was given a second chance after her near death experience

Trey : fuck !" it came out as a whisper he then started going through all the videos sli had posted in her
YouTube page

I hope it's long enough guys will catch up this side on monday ... " happy weekend Zihlobo , you know
what to do
Chapter 5

unedited

Sbahle ***

I finished my exams and today was my last day in this prison so here I am

getting out of prison after years inside. I collected my things, take off my school uniform one last time,
and then a door opens and I'm expected to step out. There must be joy in this moment, although joy
tinged by fear and weighted in expectations my brain, I processing the fact that What happens next? am
i really free? Today I'm being released from jail I was not keen in going back hone I know my mom
always makes my visit a spectacular by cooking my favorite meal and spending time with me I sigh as I
looked at my driver standing outside the car

" remember babe this is your freedom use it wisely , think with your head do not allow emotions to
crowd you " that Zim for you parting ways with my only best friend hurt more than ever I promised to
stay I touch as soon as my parents by me a phone ... I'm officially alone , i drag my suitcase and the
passenger door opened of my car, my mom stepped out and I held my mouth

Her : you thought I was going to miss you last day at school ?"

Me: maka Sbahle ?"

She smiled at me with tears in her eyes

Her :" may I hug you " I nodded as she engulfed me with a hug

Her : ooh sana lwami " this was the best day of my life to hang with my mother away from home , the
drive home was going yo be long because she first wanted us to go shopping , do our hair and catch up ,
she also bought me a phone yet! I'm 18 years and its my first time owning a phone . spending time with
Mon
 this I can get used to , for the first time in million years I could laugh with no worry in the world , I was
tired on our drive back hone I placed my head on my moms lap as she brushed my hair back

" Me : mama , how did you and farther meet ?

She looked at me in shock , she was not expecting that question from me at all

her: why are you asking me story’s from the past ? Mtanami"

I told her that i was curious to know , if it was love that brought them together or if her marriage was
arranged also .

One thing you should know about my mother is that she one of those beautify , hour glass full figured
women who normally keep to her self , she is not too much of talker and has few if no friends at all , I
guess she enjoys her duties of being a house wife or in this case force to smile and wave , it was
shocking to see her outside the royal realms she hardly leaves the house it like she made her self a
prisoner there or was made one by my uncle , but I always wondered why. So today I was hopping that
she might share some lite about her life . I looked at her with out blinking

Her : ooh God ngizoqalaphi"

Mom always find joy in talking about my dad , I know my mom loved my father better yet she still does ,
it was love at first sight luckily for here , I still don't understand the concept of Falling in love at first
sight its one of those things you either believe in or don't. The concept of it is so fairytale like, it's almost
hard to believe it can actually happen in reality. But according to mom and the way she smiling right
now ... Its looks like the mind plays tricks on you when you meet that special person , subconscious plays
a role and takes over ...its not a normal feeling at all she went on to tell me that Love at first sight has
nothing to do with good looks. If love were dependent on good looks, then we would all fall in love
every time we walked down the street and saw good looking Pearson , By the time we’d get home,
we’d have fallen in love multiple times. The real secret behind why we fall in love at first sight is because
something in the way this particular person happens to look, has triggered a comparison in our
subconscious mind to someone from our past who meant a lot to us. This is why when I fell in love with
your father I could not believe it , he was arranged to marry my sister and he saw me and well the rest is
history she said and her eyes sparkled.
Me : how did you know he was the one "

Her : baby when it happen you just know , that feeling in your gut that makes you feel like you could
take flight from the high or vomit from the anxiety-induced nausea. You can't help but feel giddy every
time they come a bit too close and you almost touch. Butterflies are a trademark sign that you are
seriously feeling some things "

Me : Wow love is creepy "

She laughed

Her : its so beautiful I pray you experience it my baby and I wish you can tell me more about it , I long to
see tears of joy in your eyes then of pain "

it's good to see her smile like this , this question was more of putting a smile on her face but also feed
me with curiosity of what love is , she talked about growing up and a how she meet my father ,while I
drifter from listen to her and actually thought why does my future have to turn out life this , why can I
marry the love of my life too ...We later arrived at home with my mom gently waking me up , the yard
was packed with few cars.

Me : what's going on ?"

Mom : ooh my God he went ahead and did it '

Me : did what maka Sbahle ? "

Her : plan your welcome hone party "

Me ,: WHAT!! He had something planned for me ???.

Her : ooh my God we are so late ... " she jumped out of the car and offers me her hand to hold
Her : come baby " she wanted to cry because she did not know about this and she is not sure how angry
her husband is , and right on queue he walked out with his whisky glass on his hand

Him : princess welcome home! " mom was apologizing for coming late , he just looks at her

Him ; not now nkosikazi ... Ngenisa umtana ngaphakathi "

I dragged my feet and indeed it was kind of like a little party, mostly relatives from my father's side ,
no...no...no they want to hug me , "Nah that's not happening." I didn't feel comfortable, I know I was
surrounded by a lot of people in prison but being surrounded by people outside especially this people it
made me sick it became a whole different atmosphere. Its my first day officially Outside of school and I
found it hard to talk to people to this people in fact ... my anxiety went on full mode .. I faked throwing
up and ran to the bathroom and locked my self there

.( few days later )

It few day before my birthday or should I say Memulo and I'm cooped up in one of the rondovel In my
homestead , I got two other girls with me , Nwabisa and Dudu they also my cousin, Dudu is a total snob
my age , Nwabisa is older them me , she a qhikiza, shy , strict and reserved while Dudu Who introduced
her self as didy is outspoken and speaks English all the time , i have been joined on the hip with them
for Four days now and two days from now I will parade half naked for the whole village to see me , I'm
only tolerating this nonsense because its my mothers idea and she finds pride in African Zulu culture ,
she still shocked let just say proud that I'm still pure .

An old lady has been appointed to guide us trough out the ceremony I have come to understand that
she is virgin tester or leads izintombi Zomhlanga in the valley she has agreed to mentor us about this
event and the importance of this ceremony , I leaned a lot about culture , respect and being a women in
particular , basically Umemulo, also known as the “coming of age, is an important Zulu ritual that
celebrates a young girl’s journey into womanhood The ceremony indicates that the young girl has
transitioned from a child and into an adult woman who can now get married Traditionally, umemulo
was performed around the age of puberty and awarded to young girls who had respected their bodies
but with evolving times and western influence on African culture, the ceremony is now done when girls
reach the age of 21 Well in my case this is done early because the Mnguni have already asked for my
hand in marriage mom thought it will be best that she do it now instead ...the ceremony is a way of
showing appreciation to the young woman for respecting herself and her family and community, along
with following their teachings.

My stepfathers believe that this will help me shape me to be a better women and stop acting like a boy
yah right... So today they slaughtering a goat ,i have it skin on my wrist ( isiphandla ) this ceremony is
done to thank the God Nomkhubulwane for guiding me to purity , a cow will be slaughter tomorrow .

I Didn't know how this was so important but seeing my mother laugh and so proud of Me it melted my
heart the only thing that got me down was when a group of old women came to the rondovel and
started preparing me for marriage I was taught on how to be good bride and wife. I would much rather
die than have such talk with this women I just looked down and listen that what was expected of me
vele ,

The next morning its 4:00am Friday morning we at the river bathing the red clay from our body ( ibovu)

Didy : we have to do something with that ink on your back "

Me : its a tattoo so if you can wash it off feel free to do so"

Nwabisa : you father will Frick out does he even know about it "

I shook my head

Didy : this is going to be so fun , I cant wait to see the look on there eyes "

We bust out and laugh , one thing we have in common with this girls is the hate we have for our parents
, so you most probably wondering how I have a tattoo let's just say during my

Rebellious stage I decided on painting my body, on my back I have my father name written in chines
going down on my spine its big and you can't hide it since it start from my neck down to the waist , it
was all Zim idea when I visited her for school holidays in Jo'burg few years back
Me : I'm somebody wife Nwabisa my father has no say over me now "

" are you ready for that " didy asked

Me : I don't think I will ever be ready ... "

Nwabisa : one think I have leaned in all of this is that you not in this thing alone the guys life is also going
to change , he also is forced to marry you ... Remember girl its an arranged marriage both parties will
hate each other For years, use those years to make a name for yourself gone are those days when we
have to leave like our mothers in such marriages "_

I was dressing up i suddenly stop

Me : what do you mean? "

Her : you want to study right ... Be independent angithi ?"

I nodded

Her : I'll give you my a tip my sister got from your sister , take charge , stand your ground ..."

Me : I don't understand "

Her : I'm engaged has been like that for Years now , My marriage was -sort of against my wishes. I just
wanted to finish college first you know In our community, girls get married between 18-21 and guys
between 24-30. "

Me : hold up I'm marrying a younger guy not a old wrinkled man "
Didy laughed " that against our royal arranged marriage laws , ooh hell no girl , you marrying a prince
most probably who will also be too pre -occupied to pay any attention to you , so kahle kahle wena you
marriage his family "

Ooh god could this be ?

Gogo: ayboo enough with chit chat asambe before the sun rise up "

We set on foot with blanket covering over our heads and Nwabisa telling me about her arranged
marriage

Nwabisa : so I was already 19 and my parents were freaking out. I agreed to engagement but not the
wedding until I finished fifth year of dental college. I come home for Christmas vacation and my parents
didn't let me go back. Like, they physically restrained me. I threatened to tell my husband to be and his
family that I was being forced to marry and drop out if school and for that I was beaten up badly my
parents forcing me now to never go back to college. I texted with SO for a few months with no luck. The
first time I saw him was at the engagement. Technically it was Zibizo ceremony which meant we were
married legally in culture now but for us I treated it as engagement .. When I had lost all faith his
mother came and took me the day after , I'm more of there younger daughter then a wife to there son I
still continued with school till today ..."

Me : ooh my God you so lucky "

She shook her head No

Her : I'm not , he is coming back next year and my living environment may change but I'm glad I got a job
line up for me now and I achieved my dream ..."

I looked at her and held her hand this was so touching , yet I thought i was alone in this mess but some
of my relatives are suffering just like I am.

Her : your sister said I must tell you my story and can only hope that you will use this situation to your
advantage, we Bhengu women we strong and I believe in you Sbahle you will not parish you will rise up
.

Monday for who for what vele , I decided to type ... hope you enjoy don't forget to promote page guys
let's grow our family ... more comments / more likes njalo and I will deliver .... to my silent readers
asikhulume guys

chapter 6

unedited

sli ***

i was Sitting on the couch close to the window in my bedroom waiting for him to arrive ,

I pulled my legs to my chest as his car parks , he stepped out looking like something that just walked out
of the fashion magazine , no doubt Trey is the most handsome man I have ever met , he was wearing
blue jeans , white shirt rolled up on his arms , white snickers , his hair was kept in place by a black
bandana , he had shades on .. I swallowed hard just looking at him, he made me realise what I just lost .
was it all worth it ... I keep playing could have been in my head Imagining the painful breakup , it messy
and noisy there is 3rd part involve that join us together . communication is lost and all we do is fight and
ague I lost him when I left, he has changed grown up exact , i wiped the tear that escaped my eyes i just
place my head on my knees , I just wish that the The Earth could stopped spinning , I wish to wake up in
his arms just for once but the ,The Sun will never again rise in the east... The nights have became
grueling, longer then they ever seemed to be the pain in my chest it's so painful its like i've been cut
open, wounded and left vulnerable to the winds of change and uncertainty ... I lost the only man I long
for , I have lost a friend...love that was so beautiful , i miss him so much he was the one person who
filled up my lonely cup and makes this world a little more habitable.

I felt the hair on the back of my neck stand , I felt his presence his in my bedroom his Cologne so
powerful almost blocking my air supply , my face was a mess I was not going to lift my head up anytime
soon I can not allow him to see me like this no.

Him : I knew you were amazing from the moment I set my eyes on you , I was just a boy going trough lot
of changes but you never gave up on me , I tried to fight what i felt for you but the heart wants what it
wants , it was futile as love proved to be stronger. Thank you for not giving up on me then .... I'm still
mad at you for choosing to go the journey alone … I wish I was there when you discovered that you are
pregnant, the joy, expectations, preparations I would have enjoyed that , but being the women you are
you yet put me first and did it all on your own I know being a single parent for the past years was not
easy it has been a struggle but looking at Zee you managed to be the best mother ever for that i thank
you! , Thank you for sacrificing your beauty I know how you girls feel about your ’ vanity," I smiled

Him : those beautiful clothes you struggled to put on that they wouldn’t fit your changing body shape
those many sleepless night's … Thank you for enduring through the pains and mood swings giving up
your favorite meals to satisfy our baby's cravings ... Thank you for standing tall against the pain and
many procedures you went through while giving birth .... i remember like it was yesterday when she
hugged me with her tinny arms I was spellbound, many things changed that moment …

I felt like I never did before, though hard to explain, it was an amazing feeling! We can call it parenthood
feeling until science catches up I've watched you turn into a mother quickly, your motherly instinct gave
me utmost confidence that our child was raised in correct manner and I could ask for any better women
to make me a father

I owe you my life ....I owe you so much that I will never repay it all...and today,

I come to you asking you to forgive me ...you hurt me Silindile by leaving and by keeping the baby news
to your self i understand your reason now and I was just to angry to listen back then and for that I'm
sorry , most of the things I said to you were out of anger and i didn't mean it , I hope you can find it on
your heart to forgive me "

He was quite and I on the other hand was a crying mess , its been three months since Trey came to
know about Zee and through out that time we have had endless fight , it was toxic and chaotic , I have
longed to hear him say this words to me ooh God , I could not stop crying right now , I felt his hands on
my shoulder I raised my head up and our eyed locked

Him: I'm sorry "

He pulled me to hug and I just melted in his arms , his heart beating fast then normal , his heavy
breathing ... I held on to him for my dear life as he brushed my back and said everything will be OK ,
Him: wish I could undo the pain you’re feeling in your heart right now. I wish I had the power to just
wash it away, make it disappear.... Please forgive me mother of my child "

Me : I long forgiven you but it's to hear you say this words to me that just make me cry , its tears of joy
mix with lot of emotions , I'm also sorry .. " he cut me off

Him : hay I understand Silindile , you have said sorry to me to last me my whole life "

I pulled out of his embraced and laughed he had that dashing smile of his face

Him : I missed that "

I looked at him and held my face and blushed , he is the only man that brings out the shy girl in me

Him: for all the things you have been trough I'm sorry I made you cry ... "_

He ran his hands on my face wiped my tears , I know this look his giving me right now it the same look
that made me fall in love with him ,

Him : you gave me a beautiful girl , she is beautiful like you ... You have made me a proud father ...
Thank you " I smiled and looked down , he lifted my chin , our eyes locked and spark started to fly

Ooh God his to close to me, my vow was to always love him has just been renewed , I feel closer to
him our heart started to beat as one Not only did we resolving our issue with Trey but the chemistry
between us has been lit , i feel closer to him and more relaxed its like i have gotten something off my
shoulders, OK the Zithelo issue is resolve thank God we can walk past that but its now leaves me
wondering about us I need to know because I have been holding on to negative feelings and finally have
the opportunity to express them. You know When you’re more relaxed, you might find that your sexual
response flows more freely and right now I need Trey ... His look change which makes me ask my self is

It really the rainbow at the end of the storm. . . or the storm just began in my life
Him : I will always love you" he will always me ? what does he mean by that?

Me : I love you".

He had to know that I love him , there is no right time or specific date you must say this three letter
words I feel it In my gut and Honestly, there's no way to know unless you know. I've said it once before,
and I meant it from top to bottom but i don't know why I feel scared to say it, but when you know it
really means something, you go ahead and say it anyway,

he kissed me on my forehead ran the back of his hands on my face look at me one more time before he
stands up . he looked outside the window and he was in deep thought , I can not read him he had this
wall over him , I stand up as well, i Want to hold him , I'm to shot and being bear foot next to him
makes me look even shorter

Me: what's going on Trey ..." I finally ask with a mother of all lump on my trout '

Him : I'm getting married Silindile "

To be continued ***

chapter 7

unedited

The day part 1

Sibahle ****
I was pretty shaken when they told me that we were going to sleep by the river on the eve of the
ceremony , but i guess their were pulling my leg because more girls joined us and they taught us the
Zulu dance yoo it was so fun , it was more of camping kind of thing I really enjoyed it , there is something
about culture that fascinated me a lot I wish I knew about this early .

In the mist of it all the singing , clapping , drum beat and dancing , I was on my own world it like
something took over me , I never felt so alive Like I am tonight , a light flashed over the river and music
died out , my mom held her mouth

Me : kwenzakalani"

Her : your uncle has came to give your spear "

I frowned still confused my mom held my hand and we had to meet up with them in the middle of the
river my mother's brother came with a spear , I had to kneel they lit impempo and called out my
mother clan name , after that he poked the spear in front of me the women started lulating , some

chanted in praise I smiled this was so overwhelming he then pinned couple of notes on my head and
gave me a gift box to open when I get home.

I was still puzzled why all of this was done in the middle of the night and the middle of the river mom
told me that it

something to do with how she left her home that why the spear had to be handed to me by the river , I
knew that tensions were high and there was more to the story when my grandmother that I have just
seen for the first time in my 18 years of existent hugged me as if her life depended on it , mom was
crying like crazy as if somebody died which made me realise there is more skeleton in my family's closet
both on my mother side and fathers side.

I exchange numbers with my grandmother and uncle I promised to keep in touch my inquisitive being
need answers anyway , my grandmother and uncle they left when it was close to dawn , it left me
feeling bitter sweet , I wish they could stay for my ceremony
" take lot pics my sunshine and will chat and Skype " gogo said , I laughed yoh this grandmother of mine
is forward .

The activities became more fun when we were about to leave in the morning , we were all naked ( all
the girls ) and only covered with a blanket sang and dance around the fire before we jumped over it and
we were told not to look back ( prevent bad omen from following us) ,so morning came so fast as
expected you know when you having fun it always short lived we had to return home , damn this girls
love to dance and sing , I did not know the songs but thanks God I’m good with dancing hay I got happy
feet , so here I was doing my thing till we finally approached the royal realms , my stepfather
welcomed me with a live goat with mpepho yo tixo I'm officially one with the smoke now , he said his
thing and I was escorted to my room to dress up , I had to were isidwaba and lot of beads the colour of
the day was yellow hideous

I know never the release i look good , my small eyes and thick pouted lips stick out of the make up that
Didy forced me to put on ,

Didy : yazi you such s work of art ... No wander your mother name you Sibahle you are true beauty "

Me : nawe umuhle nje "

Nwabisa : she just a yellow bone paint her black ungabona inunu yodwa " we laughed

Mom: asambe Sibahle its time "

We were now in the ancestral rondovel listening to my uncle go on and on damn my knees where killing
me now since I was kneeling down is he ever going to finish, A cow was slaughters that morning to
congratulate me , and thanking the ancestors for keeping me safe

He then took cow’s bile and sprinkling it on the back of my hands , fingers , toes and the top of her
head. This is believed to connect me with her ancestors and pleads with them to keep me safe and
guide me , he then step out leaving my mom with my aunts

Mom : Sbahle take off your vest sweetheart "

Didy : oh oh moment truth"

Nwabisa : Dudu awuthule "

Mom,: shesha Sisi you must hurry your guest are waiting esigcawini '

I slowly took of my top off here goes nothing ...

" yooh "

" mibhalo muni lo"

" tixo idimoni lodwa leli "

Mom: Sibahle Bhengu what on the love of Bhekumuzi have you got on your back "

Shit just hit the fan when mom start shouting using my father name in between

Me : I tattoo maka Sbahle "

Ma: I see that It a tattoo but what is it doing on your back "

I looked down

Ma : ooh Nkosi yami Sbahle izongibulala lendoda namuhla ..."

Nwabisa : we can try and cover it up with make up "

Didy : have you seen the sun outside ... You got to be Joking"
Me: do you ever shut up ?" Referred to Didy

Me : " ma I know its big but I love it its the only thing that reminds me of Dad its his name Bhekumuzi
Bhengu written in Chinese "

Her :ooh mtanami Tattoo pho ?" she laughed and turned me around and ran her hands on my back

Didy : its beautiful right ?"

Me & Nwabisa : awuthule !!!"

The whole house cracked up

My mom hugged me and took the layer of fat taken from the cow’s stomach ( imhlehlwe ) and she
covers it over my chest and back yo this thing is oily and big

One of the aunt : I hope umhlwehlwe nge uhlukani Sibahle "

Its believed that if umhlwehlwe brakes esigcawini a maiden is no longer a virgin

One of the gogo chuckle : ucwele umtwana uthe mfi ... Ngiyaziqhenya ngawe nkosazane uziphathile
mtanami "

She put white clay on my forehead as sigh that I'm still pure oh might as well tell the whole world while
at it jizz Zulu culture has no boundaries

Didy ; ooh brother there goes my make up "

I laughed this girl Jesus

Nwamisa : I'm proud of you my sister " we group hug our attire were similar and we took lot pics and
posted till we were lead out to the open space it looked like an Irena Yoo all this people came to my
ceremony , it was packed and i dance and sang I didn't even have to go around pointing my spear they
ran to me and

took the spear and dance (agiye) then put a certain amount of money only paper notes on my head

, I must be a millionaire now with all the cash that pinned on my head , I've done few cash out and off
loading my cash when it got to much , my spear was going around people and I smiled and clap hands ,
Didy was busy wiping my face , while Nwabisa stood with an umbrella next to me

Didy : ooh father good who's that yummy guy with your spear " I looked up and saw Mr White guy
walking around with this guy .. No Waite its a she but dmn she is fine

Nwabisa : fuck why did I get married early "

I looked at her and laughed

White guy : Princes we meet again "

I smiled and nodded

The stud: your husband say hi, and please forgive us we not sure about your culture we got no cash with
us but we wrote you a cheque hope you don't mind "

Didy : not at all baby we don't "

I nudge her and I felt them pinning something on my head

White guy : see you later princess "

Nwabisa : our culture also says that if you have a spear in your hand you need to do the Zulu dance "

What??? this is what I got to see ? , I have never laughed in my life like I just did right now yep its true
white man can't dance at all, and the stud with him did a nay nay mix with vosho the crowd was
laughing and cheering on

Nwabisa : Holly shit they signed you a cheque for R100k

Me ; INI ??

To be continued ***

chapter 8

unedited

[narrated ]

Trey ***

TREY just set down because he felt like his head was spinning ever since he mentioned that he is
getting married to Sli, and she stated walking around the room , she was wearing a denim bum short
and white vest , her weave was tied in a messy bun , Trey looked at how tinny her feet are on white
fluffy Capet she was walking on

Her : what ??”

The question was indirect question to herself , Trey did not have any answers , he knew that he just
broke her fragile heart into tinny pieces that can never be mended , there no turning back time even if
Sli did not leave , Trey’s fate will have still meant that he was suppose to marry a royal blood , as much
as Sli is his baby mother , his first love his family would have never approved of them , the last thing he
wanted to do was to repeat history and do the same mistake his father did.

Sli was registering everything she just heard , she than held her face and broke down and cried the last
thing that Trey ever wanted to do was to make the mother of his child cry , sli has cried enough , he
wish that he could be the one that will make her happy but in fact its like every time their path cross
there is always a boundary walls preventing them from being together , is it destiny that they brake
each others heart like this ? is it even normal for love to be so forbidden but yet to beautiful ?

She just cried even louder just thinking about what she went trough she did not believe that she just
never experience love second ago and suddenly the tide just change her heart was bleeding she yet
again Losing him to someone else it was shattering

Why couldn't they just be is This why love is such a lottery?. Rare is it that both party’s feel exactly the
same. Even if they try to figure things out that doesn’t guarantee any success.

Her : I waited I sacrifice so much and this happens to me like this ??" The sadness subsided she became
furious what was the point in believing in the upper power? what was the point of following destiny
when it has to hurt her like this , Unlike men, who always want to be a woman’s first lover, women
always desire to be a man’s last lover with whom they settled down with . she has given him a child , yes
it was not planned but the baby has to count for something , she never saw her self raising a child as a
single parent or co-parenting with Trey, was she to naïve and believed that happy ending will come
trough for her if she persevered trough all the instruction provided … she waited for so long to be in
this one room with Trey and talk like old time without fighting but she never pictured it to be like this ,
only to hand over him over to his final and future lover , she felt so borrow or ‘used’ by destiny

Trey : Silindile " she felt the air way shutting down , she held her chest
She was more frustration at the fact that they wasted their time preparing him for commitment which
never belong to her . she was scorned woman

Her : what there to say Trevor hhhe ? haven’t you hurt me enough ? why does loving you hurt so much
!!!“

he breath out loud and held his head facing down it was complicated fucked up situation

her : “ do you love her ? “

him : “ Sli don’t do this to yourself ? “|

her : “ just answers me !! “

him : “ no … I don’t even know her , its an arranged marriage “

her : what?”

him : “ royalty “

her : “ oh my God … what am I going to tell my daughter Trey ? she just found you and already she is
asking too many question’s about us “

Trey looked down he never thought that far all along he did what he had to do because he was forced to
do so now there is child involve his child , considering separation with Sli brought fear of the
unknown . How will this affect his Princess , Will she slip to emotional depression ? Will she hate him
for putting her through this mess? Is this going to scare her off marriage and commitment for the rest of
her life? Will the women his arranged to marry be nice towards his princess , he held his head , he was
not sure about everything … but he remember the vow he made to his people to his family

him : “ it a condition in my life that I need to uphold “

sli : “ why Trey “

him : “ it is what it is Silindili , I wanted to tell you my self the truth then you hearing from someone else
, I'm sorry ok … but you the one that left me , have you ever once thought that when you come back I
would not be crying over you or waiting for you ? I got duties to do and kingdom to run , I don't expect
for you to understand but I will appreciate if is for you stop blaming me for a condition I have no control
over “

Sli : Trey you are arranged to marry a women you don't love …and you expect me to be happy for you ….
You know very well how I feel about you …!!! “

She was shouting and Trey hated that , the Alpha inside of him commands respect and this what she is
doing was pissing him off

Him : I'm in the same room as you are , you will refrain raising you voice at me uyezwa!! "

His voice was commanding that alone got Sli on a submission mode

Him : as I was saying ... " she cut him of and that angered him even more

Her : “ did you think of what this will do to Zee"

Him : “ bull shit silindile why you using my child to fight you battles!!!! “

Her : So when you came here to tell me this what did you expect ? for me to be happy … to say
congratulation ? “

him : haybo I told never raise your voice at me !! " he roarer , sli looked down in able to control her tears
,

Trey looked at her , he was angry but some how It killed him to see Sli crying like this she was broken to
no extent all the years he has know sli she has watch her put on a coat of strength , sli was more like
an eggs in his eyes tough on the outside but soft on the inside. Initially, she seem rather
unapproachable and cold, but as you get to know her, you discover that she has a warm side too. Trey
understood this , Sli may stand in front of millions and motivate and heal others but her own wounds
and bruises are bleeding out and not attended, its true that People who are outwardly tough are easily
mistaken as rocks. They are respected for their strength and confidence, but honest fact is that there
masters of the disguise of there true pain

Him : “ im sorry ok … my intention was not to hurt you , but to come clean to you , as a mother of my
child i know the sacrifice you made for me and for Zithelo , you put you life on hold and I hate that im
the cause of that … I wish I can tell you that this is a bad dream you will wake up from , but reality is that
… this time tomorrow I need to be with my wife … “

Sli felt defeated as she sank on the bed , she had no fight in her , Trey made his way and set next to her ,
parting with the only women who ever held his heart was the most difficult thing he has to do

him : What I’m trying to say is that just because someone gets married doesn’t mean they married the
love of their life. You will always be the true love of my life , What’s most important is that you don’t
allow it to make you feel bad about yourself, or prevent you from finding happiness Your perception is
your reality … please Sli don’t let me hold you back "

As Trey ran his hands on his face , he felt the rush to hold her and so he did pull her for a hug ,

Sl slide down of the bed and stood in front of Trey if this is the last time he going to be with him as a
single man she might as well make it memorable ,

Her : what about me Trey ...ngenzenjani?" he stopped and looked at her , she was in between his legs ,
she lifted her top and took it off

Trey : sli... Please "_his eyes were meet with her lacy white bra ,

He swallowed he knew that he could not stop the edge inside of him

him: I'm really sorry " he said and he pulled her close she placed her forehead on his there eyes locked
, they lips touched , she held her breath as she felt the worm of his touch on her body …
.

[not narrated ]

Sli ***

Nothing else in the world mattered then for me to be in his arms again , call me stupid , call me naïve ,
horny bitchy I don’t care , I have longed to be with him for years , I dreamt about him giving me multiple
orgasm , and right now I want to hold him feel him just for the last time ,

My heart felt like it would jump out of my chest. When he lifted me up My soul felt too big for my skin.

He lay me down on the bed, and I grabbed his chest. Holding him was like riding a bike. It was as if
nothing had changed, as if the last few years we spent separated didn't exist

The intensity of our togetherness, then and there, was enough to make up for all lost time.

The moment our lips locked felt like our first kiss, he tasted so good – My alluring forbidden fruitful
taste of his lips , A succulent and sweet taste that

Lies within those soft lips

But still why must I distance my self to him ?, must i distance myself to this I don’t think I can his going
down on me he making me touch all the planets in the universe I can't hold it I scream his name I push
his head deep in between my legs, this feeling I have right now

its beyond my grasp its so alluring, forbidden but yet so addictive , No matter how hard I fight it , I
splash my juices he suck me dry and make me taste my self in his lips , his lips so forever tender and
sweet , From the very first taste of That first stolen kiss I became addicted. This feeling was followed by
first touch in my most delicate places I don't know if his too big he can not feet I flinch , he cradle me
under his arms he planted bite on my neck as the growled like a bull on my ear and I let out a moan as
my walls stretch to accommodate him

Him : “ you waited “

I bite my lip and nodded , his eyes we barely visible , his voice husky and way too deep , Every muscle in
my body eased into repose. Every inch of him surrendered to the vulnerability inside of me. Memories,
mostly good, flooded my mind with his every thrust –

It was like a melody I sang on my conscious mind crying inside as he

thrust in, ~~~~it’s been so long~~~,

thrust out,~~~ you’ll have to go soon~~~

thrust in~~~, I remember what your love felt like~~~~

Thrust out,~~~ wait, come back, please do not go I need more of you~~

Touching him felt like pure poison. I knew he was eventually going to leave, but all I wanted to do was
make our moments last. He was the illicit love, and I the naive wanderer, willing to do anything just to
get my hands on him before he became somebody else property , this was my dream to be in his arms

We spent the rest of the night holding each other tossing me on top , him on top , on the floor on the
shower it was explosive ...

I woke up with tears in my eyes, unable to contain my longing for him. His side of the bed was warm , his
Cologne lingered , I felt emptier than I've ever felt before, I thought being with him would reignite
something in me. I thought fooling around with my past would help catapult me forward into the future.
. . what future do I have without him

you know what to do...

Chapter 9
.

unedited - crop top

Trey **"

I stood on the shower and water washed over me. I was at Sbu and Pam’s house here in Durban I'm not
sure if I feel shame or what? I just spend the night with my baby mama , I not only just slept with her
once or twice I spend the whole night with her to top it up on the eve of my bloody engagement party ,

damit Trey you are fuckin married man what really come over you ? I ask myself , Yes I love Sli no doubt
but I feel like I took advantage of her .... of the situation in fact ... was sex necessary ? Jesus but I must
admit

After all that was said and done I just fond there's nothing sexier than what you can't have, so when sli
initiated breakup sex I obliged. It's supposed to be the best sex, right? Besides the damage is already
done, so what's the harm? I closed the tap and looked at myself in the mirror

" it was just break up sex Trey this things happens get over it " I convinced myself , I walked out of the
bathroom , time was not on my side and I was ignoring calls from my grandmother , Austin and Mbali …
not to mention mama , shit they all waiting for me at the Bhengu homestead and I’m here cleaning the
guilt and shame of sleeping with my baby mama , I quickly dressed up and took my car keys and phone
and rushed out , I turned music on but fuck my thoughts were so loud , I felt like I was possessed ,
every time I closed my eyes I saw Sli face biting her lip , her Mouth slightly open , her lustful look she
made when I go deep on her ,

“ get out of my head “ I banged the steering wheel “ she was tormenting me no doubt I recalled looking
at her for the last time before I left the room with no goodbye note of goodbye kiss , all I could see was
pain in her heart , she is the person with less power in this break up she is heartbroken and really wants
to get back together, while the i with more power doesn’t... I can but I just can't yes sex was a bliss but I
feel shame and guilt , Sli is the mother of my baby not piece of meat that I can snack on , she means
more to me than that

"Fuck " I cursed out loud , Romantic relationships are essentially addictive…so when an attachment is
severed, the natural reaction is one of withdrawal , obsession, craving, and pain why did I have t
complicate this with sex

Me: damit Sli ..."_

I was so sure and also told myself that i will never cheat on my wife no women deserve such heart arch ,
but fuck this breakup sex just confuse me i got mix feelings now , I'm not sure if i have started to feel
loved-up again or just remember how good she was in bed and suddenly the reasons for breaking up
don't seem to make quite so much sense anymore but Whether i decide to get back together with her or
just end up in that horrible “we're exes who are still hung up on each other but are still having sex" area
which i pray not to be like that ooh God please I just have to try not to get into that ... stuck in that
loved-up glow fever its not worth it or healthy , my phone connected to bluetooth almost making me
pee myself

" ukuphi ?"

I breath out loud it was only Zoe

" aah ..."

" come on Trey uGogo is explaining why the groom is absent kuzibizo zomkakhe ... I know this is not an
ideal situation for you but mfethu think about this girl you humiliating "

Me : I'm on my way Zoe , I just had a flat tire "

" oh brother please just get here now "

She dropped the call and I speed off shit way to go Trey you just made yourself an ass to your in-law.

Two and half hours late ….

" finally you made it "

I shook my head fixed my shirt ,

Me : how do I look "

Mbali : like you someone's husband

Austin : this people made us do Zulu dance "

Me : you gave her her money right ? "

Mbali : dude did you hear what we just said we freakin dance in front of a crowd and we Trending now
" I inwardly rolled my eyes at Mbali , I'm so nervures I mean I'll be meeting my wife for the first time ,
tradition says we must stand outside till " amaqhikiza “ gets us

Me : I hope she likes her dress"

Austin : she is beautiful bro . . . grandma got taste , trust me even if she rocks out of here with a sack on
she will still be gorgeous “

Mbali : I still think she plays for my team "

Me :what ?... "_

Austin : she got this twisted thing on her head that princess is a stud "

I chuckled ... And asked about koko they told Me that she in the tent with the VIP guest she with Mama
, I breath out loud
Austin : looks like there done handing out gift “

Me : “ what ? “

Mbali pointed and I saw commotion on the entrance , my heart was beating on my throat

Me : “ I wish you are here “

Her : “ I know baby , I just pray to get better so I can see that gem you marrying “

me : “ who told you she beautiful ? “

Her : “ koko could not stop bragging “

I laughed , I was chatting to Pam who was pissed that she could not come , she was not fit to fly , she
has been very sick this day and Dr recommended bed rest for her , I looked up when I heard singing
from girl

Me : wow “

Austin : I guess this is an invite inside "

Mbali : about time I'm starving

Sbahle ***

my family have made this a norm to do things behind my back , here I was all happy and free thinking
that it's my big day my birthday / Memulo And dukuduku ...mom

came like a tornado to my table “ Go hide at the rondavel Sbahle your in-law balethe izibizo “ ... I was
shocked and angry why was I not told about this

Ma: look at your face now and ask me why I never told you "

“ but angikadli ma “

Her : just Go sibahle ! “

I felt like screaming , so here I was in my room being told that today was going to be my memulo
infused with izibizo ceremony which means that Grooms people will need to award my family with gifts
, and I need to do umbondo in a days time from now , which is more or less the same thing issue gifts
and grocery to my in-laws not as if they need it from what I pickup my ,in-laws are loaded … we just
follow ing culture and customs nje

Didy : “ looks like you having a summer wedding “

Oh I forgot to inform you that the white and traditional wedding is in mid December , am I happy about
finding about all of this today as in few hours ago oh hell no ! on the day of my Memulo oh hell no! , it
like my family is deliberately pissing me off .
Nwabisa : “ get off the window , your in –laws are coming here “

I was just wrapped on my bathrobe and I was tired mind you i never slept for the past few days

two beautiful women walked in greeted us

“ ninjani … “ asked the one with nit afro , she has curves for days and dimples wow beautiful , we
greeted them back

“ we sister of your Husband and we were sent to dress you up … “ well it tradition that Groom comes
with gift and my outfit they must dress me up from head to toe and judging from the bags they came
with they had everything , I picked up that the girl with afro her name is Veli and the other with Pink hair
coloured is Nokuzola , but they called her Zoe , her personality was welcoming and she loves joking and
laughing

They called in a girl to do my makeup and nails , while they set and chat with me , they were pretty
friendly , Zoe loves her champagne because the glass did not leave her hand

and I got to understand the family I’m married into , its located in the Ngonyama village based in west
part of Swaziland , my husband to be is king his name is Mvelo Trevor Mnguni , lawyer by profession ,
CEO of his law firm and other major companies , including hotels , malls , farms …

Zoe : “ so what you want to study ? “

I have not thought that far , all I know is that I’m good with numbers

Didy : “ she is not afraid to speak her mind and very good judge of corrector so I think being a Judge will
be great career path for her “

I looked at her this girl never shut up

Veli: “ well I like how you think Dudu , it will be great working hand in hand with Ngonyama “ that the
name they call my husband i kinda like it too , it carries so much power

Zoe : “ true running the kingdom and empire .. good thinking “ they high five with Didy I just laughed

The lady who was doing my makeup , she packed up they things and smiled as she looked at me , I
finally had to put on my attire it was nothing Fancy just traditional Swati print Long umbrella skirt, white
bobtube elegant top with pearls details , I also had this big over the shoulder beads , a head scarf that
match the skirt and a matching cloth to put over my shoulders , the dominant colour was red

" I'm not wearing that " I pointed at red high heels that Zoe tried to put on my feet ,

She Giggled

Zoe : “ I told you Veli that she will not wear this shoes “

They laughed
Zoe : “ I hope you don’t mind wearing takkies “ I smiled when I saw white all star chuck taylor

Zoe : I love you ink ... What does it mean ? “ she was referring to my tattoo

Me : its my late father name , "

She nodded

Me : and your ‘s " she had big tattoo of angel wings on her back , it was one of manny that she had , she
said ink painting is therapeutic to her , you see i'm not alone got people who think like me

Her : its represent my baby girl , lost her before I could hold her "

Me : im sorry "

Her : it OK ...umuhle "

I looked down " thank you "

We heard girls singing

Zoe : wow right on queue we done

Veli : it's about time ... Come it's time to meet you hubby "

Didy : “ ooh my God is that him ? “

I suddenly felt my knees shaking oh God No !

Guys we have not even reach chapter 10 but teams are split into 2

# team Sbahle

# team Sli

Well let's keep the convo going , its so fun reading your comments , you make my day fam … don’t
forget to like / comment

chapter 10

unedited

Sibahle ***
I walked out looking down and every one was creaming my name , women ululate, Man praising me
with my clan name , I zintombi singing

“ Woyisholo wena! Woyisholo wena!

(Ukuthi why ubuntombi ungasenabo!)

Baphi omama bey'ntombi iy'ntombi ma_Africa!

Khuzani khuzani olafa elakithi sil'bhekile!

Baphi omama bey'ntombi iy'ntombi ma_Africa!

Wololo wololo wololo wentombi olafa elakini lik'bhekile!

Woy'sholo wena woyisholo wena ukuthi why ubuntombi ungasenabo!!

Uyoy'sholo wena!

Inkomo kababa wena engabe wayiqhuba washonisa ngaphi!

Engabe way'qhuba liphuma ilanga engabe way'qhuba lishon'ilanga!

Uyoy'sholo wena!

Inkomo kababa wena way'qhuba way'shonisa ngaphi!

Engabe way'qhubele empumalanga noma way'qhubel'entshonalanga!

Uyoy'sholo wena! Igezile yathitshilo izofiki inganono! “

My ears were buzzing , my heart beating out of my mouth , this walk was very long , my Knees were
shaking

Zoe : “ breath sisi “

Didy : “ you crushing my hand girl “

Did I listen no I was panicking I thought about what I’m forced in too , Marriage at 18th ? , I haven’t
enjoyed life I haven’t seen the world , what going to happened to me , what if this man abuse me or
treat me like how my uncle treat my mother , I felt a wave of anger no this right here was fear , I was
not the smart brave girl I was terrified girl who wised she was given time to grow , brake few heart ,
learn from few mistake before expected to grow up to soon to be a wife … a Queen , I wanted to run
way I wanted to escape , the noise was too much , they really giving me away , oh how I wish my father
was still alive , at this instant I hated everyone who called them selves my family no body stood up or
fought for me every body thought that this was a good arrangement and it will benefit the two families,
I must be grateful that my uncle has negotiated with a good wealthy family . I do not think my feelings
were conceded on this marriage arrangement at all .

Zoe : “ come seat down love “

There was grass mat on the floor I set down did not lift my head , there was lot of movement in front
of me , different shoes was the only thing I could see , I could hear camera flicking , veli was talking
and she was placing things in frond of me , designer cloths , boxes of shoes , bags , jewellery there was
blanket put over my shoulders , another placed on my legs , I was suffocation … women were busy with
ululating , only face I wish to see was my mothers right now , the singing started again , I’m guessing
there done , it was to noisy but that did not stop me from hearing my heart thumping on my trout, I
was still left with a mini blanket over my shoulder while our servants took my gifts from the floor to be
honest the gift giving was a blear to me I saw lot of things being placed in front of me but my ears and
eyes were not there ,

which did not slightly surprise me because with arranged marriages you never have a fairy tale wadding
, you do not plan you do not have an opinion , everything is not illustrated but planned for you

my body was there but my head was miles away it was just a nightmare . they call it an engagement
party but to me it felt like my funeral I sat on a grass mat for hours facing down , because with zulu
culture its not appropriate to look at your in laws in the eyes , most of my close relatives and in-laws
Kept admiring my beauty and how I’m going to be the perfect “ MAKOTI “ they said , I just smiled as
they kneeled down and whispered in my ear.

I could hear my Uncle laughing like a clown, I wish I could stand up from this mat and take off this doke
and run to him and stab him , while I was lost in thought in a plot on how to kill my father

I felt a lone tear escape , shit just got real I’m officially a Mnguni wife .

I was brought back to reality by there cheer that shook the room , raising my head will be conceded
disrespect so I looked at the floor , I could feel that my legs were numb now , I have been sitting in the
same position for almost an hour now
Nwabisa :” do you want stretch your legs “

She was seating next to me , I guess she saw how uncomfortable I was

Me : “ please … “

Her : “asambe “ she stood up

Me : “ I think my legs are asleep now “

She giggled and helped me to get up , I slowly limped away from the eye that were looking at me , and
the irritating camera snapping , the minute I was in the rondavel I breath out loud ,

Her : “ I knew that you were struggling to breath , sit right here I will get you food “

Me : is that even allowed ? “

Her : “ I don’t care … you were uncomfortable back there besides , the gift offering ceremony is over so
you my cuz you played your part “

Me : “ thank you “ I was about to take my blanket off

She stopped by the door “ make sure that you cover yourself up if someone nocks or come in especially
your in-laws … “

Me : “really “

Her : “ it symbol of you being a young wife … “ I huffed as she walked out .
Later on I was resting on the bed with a plate of food on my hand eating , Nwabisa was rubbing my
legs , Dudu was busy telling us how good she looks on all of the pic taken , another girl was with us and
she was Friends of Dudu she was telling me how beautiful my Husband is , I brush that thought off

Dudu : “ ya mganai yo Mzala muhle mina I think the white guy has a thing for me … imagine getting
married to a white guy “

Ok now im shocked did my snob cousin speak Zulu right now

Nwabisa : “ yoh nikhuluma umageba uma senikhuluma ngamadoda “

Dudu : “ aysuka … you two are taken , some of us we still need to show face to get inkomo zababa”

I laughed

“ mmmm girl he is hot “ she was so irritating with this, I was to tired to pay any attention to her loud
mouths so I pretended to not hear a thing ,

I was about to dose off the way I was so tired , when we heard a nock on the door

Nwabisa : “ Sukuma .. “

We all scrambled up , Dudu took my plate , I quickly jumped down , took my blanket covered my
shoulders looked down

“ Sanibonani Zintombi “ she greeted

“ yebo ma “ the girls answered

“ May I have a word with Sibahle please “ she asked , I breath out loud at least it not my arranged
married to be hubby I did not look up but I responded , she requested in fact she commanded the girls
in the room to step out .

“ yebo mama” they said and walked out , nerves are killing me right now she was wearing a long skit red
and black sort of a xhosa attire with black stiletto hills , she sounded very polite well, mannered and
her voice was soft , she told Me she is Makhumalo and she is happy to finally meet me, she advised me
that my husband to be will come in to see me

Her : “ ngiyabuya ngisayomulanda “ I heard her clicking sound of her heels as she walked out , I

lifted my head to check the coast if it was clear , yep she was gone , I decided to change my seating
position because I could feel my leg falling asleep on me , I lifted this heavy blanket away from my
shoulders, I stood up and after some minute when I realized that this so called husband to be is not
coming in , I went to the window to take a pick on what was happening outside it was still buzzing as if
it’s the actual wedding .

I could not believe my eyes when I saw him , I noticed him because the Makhumalo lady pulled him
aside from the crowd to talk to him , he was wearing a shirt that had the same Swati prints as my skits ,
white pants , he was tall , looked coloured , had long dreadlocks , he was buffed up showed that his
friends with the gym , pink lips , sharp nose , he had a straight look and only side smile , he was
intimidating no doubt , ohh God … he was handsome shame I must admit , he looked young maybe in
his early 20ths , I started crying I wish I could run away and never come back from home … I was not
ready for this not now not ever this guy terrified me , I noticed that he was walking towards my room I
quickly jumped back to my mat covered my self and sobbed in silence . I could feel his presence as he
came closed

“ aaah hi “ his voice alone made the hair on the back of my neck stand , it was bold and deep , I tried to
find words to say but there failed me so I decided to nod

Him: zimbule gikubone ( reveal your self so I can see you)

I was very reluctant to do so because I’m sure by now my eyes are red because I was crying , I slowly
lifted my head
Him: my name is Mvelo, and you are ?"

I sad in almost a whisper ,

Me : I’m Sibahle … “ I stopped my self for continuing , I did not know if I should add “im Sibahle baba or
I’m Sibahle Ngonyama “

Him: ok , its nice too meet you … you are truly beautiful “ , my eyes were still fixed on his shoes as much
as my head was lifted I was amazed on how his voice filled my ear like the sound of base gutter, he
smelled very good and I could notice by the Italian shoes he had on that he was all about money . there
was silence in the room for a moment , so I decided to take pick at him, our eyes met , hold up his
eyes…. i don’t know , there are different shades , unique colour I have never seen such exotic looking
eyes , this man is oh my god I hate to admit it HOT , he ooze confidence and was that a smile i saw , his
skin so polished , he bit his inner cheek ooh Father God that so Hot , I quickly looked away I could not
believe that this man had good futures , his eyes were big and he had thick eyebrows, I stated to blush
and I wish he could just leave I must not feel like this , I should not … its arranged Sbahle I convince my
self .

He cleared his trough , oh shit I looked at him , was I suppose to do that , oh God I just disrespected a
king

maybe I should apologize , I know how traditional royal people are .

Me : Im sorry “

Him : for ? “ he was speaking really close to me , no he is actually crouched in front of me

Me : I was not suppose to look at you . “

Him: how will you know the person that you marrying if you do not look at him ? “

Wow I did not know if he was being sarcastic or maybe just making a funny remark ,
That was my queue to just keep quite before my mouth says something that will put me in hot waters ,
he cleared his trough I felt his hands on my chin as he lifted my face to look him , our eyes locked , I felt
my stomach doing back flips , I held my breath thank god to my small eyes I could look down without
him noticing that I’m not looking at him ,

Him : you have every right to be afraid of change , You may feel very secure in the pond that you are in,
but if you never venture out of it, you will never know that there is such a thing as an ocean, a sea. All I
see in your eyes is a person who over think every expect that you have encounted , Projecting certain
assumptions into certain situations can be disastrous , it’ll lead you towards developing a defensive front
or counter-attacking when no concern may even be warrantee , your pretty little eyes tell me that you
are your own worst enemy. This may come as a bit of a shock and I hope it does. But you are more
powerful than you possibly realize and your potential is limited by only one factor:"

I finally found courage to look at him

Him : never be an enemy to you self , not every one is guning for you "

He stood up

Him : “ you have such beautiful eyes , and there are a window to your pain just like a mermaid has no
tears, and yet she suffers so much more , but her beauty will not make us see her fears and pain ”

Him : “nice to meet you my wife ” he said to me , I nodded and I felt his presents fade as he walked out,
he left me there thinking what just happened , who the hell did I merry , he just saw through me , my
walls were immediately knock down … what just happened ?

.
.... you know what to do ...

chapter 11

unedited

Sli ***

I got up from the bed changed sheets put on new linen , made my way to my bathroom took long bath
,jumped out minutes later and wrapped towel around my body I took a look at myself in the mirror and
notice that Trevor has left a trail of love bites on my neck , I had this moment of touching myself and
thinking about yesterday’s event , I immediately had a change of mood when I realised what today is , I
clicked my tongue and walked out I jumped into my skinny jean and lose shirt , dragged my sleepers
with a load of laundry on my hand I found Nola on the high chair fixated on her tab when she saw me
she put the tab face down , ooh she probably looking at Trey pic of the ceremony

Me : unjani "

Her : hi ... " I made my way to the laundry room dump everything on the Washing machine poured soap
and tuned it on when I turned around Nola was by the door

Her : are you OK .. "

Me : mmmm , where is Zee "

Her : took her to mkhulu last night because her father's car was still on driveway when we came back
from the mall , I thought you two needed more time to talk "

Me : mmm'

Her : sli are you OK..."

Me : yep im ok … “ I faked a smile

I took an apple and walked out

Her : Silindile Trey slept over last night and today his getting married I know you not ok babe "

Me : Nola I'm fine ..."

Her : Sli you slept with him ... Please talk to me how are you how are you feeling , let me in Sli we
walked this road together "

Me : “ Nola stop pushing please I don’t feel like talking about Trey “
Her : “ for how long are you going to run, hide your feeling , your heart you experience heart break and
I want to be there for you … so get out “

Me : and say what?? that yet again another man was able to walk over me and left me high and dry !,
that I waited for this day to come and he basically ,fucked me and left me in my bed ? what must I say
that I was stupid to follow fate and destiny just to be served with “ I’m arranged to marry someone else
“ … you know what Nola I don’t need you pity , your shoulder to cry on ,” your it ok to cry” bullshit …
and that look of pity you giving me now “

Her : “it's not pity … I told your for years to find him and tell him the truth if only you found him earlier
… we would have been speaking another language now !! demit sli you don’t listen

Me : “ so its my fault that he dumped me ? “

She just looked at me

Me : “ wow nola … just wow ! “

Her : “ I know you love him Sli and I still think sleeping with him was wrong move … you can not have
closure of letting go if you just become intermit with a person you love “

I looked at her , she will never understand I see it in her eyes that she wants to tell me to move on Nola
is feminist she believes that women don't need a man to be happy , she is right to a certain extent ,
truth be told I don’t need Trey to make me happy but I need his to complete me ,

Me : “ look Nola as much as you think you understand what I’m going trough you don’t “

Her :sli “ I just walked up to my room , one thing Nola has never experienced is to love , she 25 years
old but she has never loved or has ever been in relationship and she can not give me advisee about
matters concerning the heart.

You know to love wholeheartedly it will always raises the question of how do you move on with your
life after losing the one you love, the person you thought you might grow old with?

It doesn’t matter how famous I may be right now but i will still feel the hurt, regret, and despair at
seeing the person i still love marry and have children with someone else it's a bitter pill to swallow. I
have been through many extremely painful things. Many But nothing was as painful as a broken heart. I
felt beyond lost.

But today I was not going to break down , not in front of no one , I'm good at putting this face that I'm
OK while I'm hurting inside. Did that with my first marriage allowed a man to walk all over me , abused
me physically and emotional but stepped out of the house the following day with makeup on and smiled
to the world as if I'm in happily ever after marriage,

I put on my kicks fix my weave tool my car Keys and phone

Me: I'll go get Zee “

Nola breath in and out loudly feeling defeated as I walked out , the memories of trey inside me soaked
my panty liner , I pressed my thighs together, the thought of last night lingers in my head , Trey Is the
second guy I ever sleep with even my dead husband never feed all my sexual desires like how Zee dad
did , driving became difficult that I packed aside and held my face " dahm you Trey "

I wiped my tears , I stepped outside my car. I had to think on what I must do, God knows I can leave
Trey maybe go to another country I have done that before , but now I Got Zee the glue between me and
him how can I move on when he will be in my life forever . this alone infuriated me a bit , his wife will
be in the picture , visitation right will apply joined custody , my child will be bouncing from county to
country no stable life because her parents are separated .

this was never the life I envision for my child , God why is my happiness feel so borrowed … it like I’m
given to only return it back because it was never mine to keep

Those of us who have loved and lost are told to ‘move on’. Yes, we must do just that, but it takes time
and a lot of healing. We are brought up with the belief, and are told repeatedly, that there is the one
special person out there for us. If we believe we had found them and then lost them what does that
make of all the assurances we were given, Also we ask what does that say about ourselves that we
couldn’t even hang on to the one true love in our lives?

After spending an hour in the middle of nowhere I did that last break down wailed as I felt my heart
breaking in million pieces , with that last big cry i realize that things weren't meant to be with Trey, and
it'll all be OK eventually i may never fully get a sense of closure about why it ended like this and why I
had a visions and dreams telling me to hold on to him , but at least i have some clarity at this point... His
married , happiness is not for everyone I guess

I finally start my car and drove to nearest chemist

" my I get a morning after pill "

Oh yes I'm not repeating another Zee situation not this time around I learned my lesson , after taking my
dose I took a drive to the beach and set on the bench and looked at the waves , I'm tempted to check
Trey social media but that alone will drive me crazy , its time I put my big girl panty’s on and leak my
wounds.

Trey ***

We were too tired to fly back home so we book guest house not far from the Bhengu homestead , we
left the Bhengu house very late and I was happy to finally put a face to my wife , she is beautiful I must
say , her thick pouted lips , small chinese eyes high cheekbones , She looks like a sweet little lamb from
afar, but when you get close, you find out she skinned and ate the damn thing just to use it as a coat.
She’s a beast , feisty , fearless and does not break easily , she the most toughest cookie I have ever seen
, she’s vivacious , stand her ground she may find hard to look me in the yes as a sign of respect but I see
the drive and ambition in her , Fear played a huge part in her life she carries to much sorrow of her past
and also of her current situation , she has been caged for years that she forgot her true potential , her
wings are colourful as her personality but she fears the unknown , am I in love with her ? no fam , but
i'm intrigued , she no push over and that alone makes me want to step up to the challenge she will bring
.

Looking at her, she reminds me so much of my sister she looks down like a snake but when she rise she
will strike and it will hurt I shook my head and laughed .

I kept holding on to my can of beer I could not drink , i'm still trying to calm down from the high and low
of being an official married man and I’m happy to say that the ceremony was beautiful, I looked at my
loud friends and smiled , Zoe , Austin and Mbali were drinking to them this was another party to get
sloshed and fool around , but to me this was my life changing day …

I stepped out of the room to think but found koko sitting on the balcony fanning herself

Her : kuyashisa kulendawo and nani ninomusindo " it was close to midnight

The stars were clear but the weather made it feel like there is sun up in the sky , KZN is very warm
especially in summer , nights feel like days as well

Me ; there is an air-conditioning inside "

Her ;_hayi suka I rather enjoy this breeze "

I nodded

Her : thank you my son"_

I looked at her

her : I know getting married at 22 years was not part of your plan "

Me : “ or being a king “ she laughed and continued to fen herself

her: you know i never chose her for you “

me : “what ? … I don’t understand “

her : you two were arranged to marry while she was still a fetus in her mother womb"

Me : what ? “

" when the war started and we lost everyone , I ran to the caves but Khwezi located me and I ran again ,
the only way to survive was to exiled from home so I ran south , she did not stop hunting me down ,
she wanted me dead because I was the only person who has seen the vision of the new kingdom where
you will rule … the prophecy was said long time ago about you and the death of royal blood but no one
believed that a women will spill the royal blood leaving no one to survive “

I looked at her , KOKO hates talking about the past she said that it too painful for her to replay it in her
head , she said that she has see people get killed in the most cruel manner , she hates that she survived
to tell the tale of what happened to our family .

Her :weeks turned months in hiding and running , I had no food , no clothes and nothing to drink , I
scavenged eating anything that moved to keep my strength, by then I had no clue that Knosiyesizwe
survived or not all I knew is that every white lion that roamed the land was short dead , I had no one I
was alone, I hide … ran …hide… ran till one day I just gave up I was in foreign lands and I was starving
haven’t eaten for days and I could not keep my eyes open I remember trying to get up but it was a
mission and light went dark for me , I woke up on an unfamiliar surrounding but the warm smile of
Nontombi reassure me that I'm safe , I stayed for two years with them and they were good people and
I felt like I belonged , but the Mnguni fallen kings came to me in a dream and told me to return home ,
as Queen it was my duties to go back home to my people , leaving this place was hard because I had no
clue what await me back home , when I hugged Nontombi on my day of departure I felt and sense a
soul inside of her , but she also had dark cloud over her and the unborn baby “

Me : “ no ! koko uthini ? “

She nodded

Bhekumuzi Bhengu rescued me , hide me in his home for years , he was king and he knew about the
Massacre of the Innocents that was happening in the far East in our land , he told me that he had a
dream about me and him finding me was not buy luck , but the Bhengu ancestors lead him to where I
was “

I was lost I felt like my knees were shaking ,

Her : Before I left He told me when she turns 18 I must come and get her she the only leaving royal
blood that carries the strength of the Oshun “

Me : “ ooh GOD ! … she is one of gogo Ndoni’s descended .. “

Her : her destiny lays in my hand I didn't know what he meant about that till you came back home and
the dreams started, "

Me : so the Bhengu help you "

She nodded

Her : not only me but you and your sister, spiritually I’m connect with you , if khwezi captured me she
was going conjured my spirit to locate you , you would have died without fulfilling your purpose ... You
are the last descendent of the lion blood ...and you need Sibahle she is the last leaving river orisha, or
goddess, your blood and hers will need to infuse again like Ndoni and Somdali did “

I nodded

Her : I know you love Sli .. She is the mother of your child but will never survive the lion throne ... "

Me: but she also said something about destiny that kept her away from me it was supposed to be four
years but her grandfather forced her come "

She stood up and looked at me

Her : blood moon will rise again in a months times , remember what the fallen kings told you about the
moon ? "

Me : " blood moon means huvest time when king is born “

She shook her head “ not that … what else “

Me : blood moon will bring purity, fertility, love, and sensuality for a king to be born "

I looked at her and popped my eyes

Her : mmmm looks like destiny is broken and not fulfilled , that why a mate can never seat in the throne
, trust me I know I was never a chosen one but your grandfather' mate … the throne is to powerful for
me to handle that why I almost died. . . it was never my place “

Me : “ koko are you trying to say “

Her : OMnguni banolaka Mvelo ... It's time you understood the importance yeziyalo zedloti … "

sorry for posting late but i hope you enjoy , i'm working on another one right now as promised , lets
interact / like page and share page ZIHLOBO

chapter 12

unedited

Sbahle ***

Sleeping with Zim was mission this girl kicks and snores , yes my friend showed up last night and I was so
happy , we talked till late and they clicked with Didy , I was disappointed that non of my siblings came
but oh well the only thing that made us family was dad I guess to them I'm just another long distance
relative ...

Apparently being Mvelo fiancé got me trending , I hate the public eye and now I got people following me
on social media some people are hating on me some are just too nice and fake , I guess that my new life
.

I woke up early because of my sleeping conditions , I did my hygiene process and made my way out of
the bedroom. The house was quite thanks God. I was not looking forward in smiling and greeting , the
only Good thing that this man ever done was to build his other house away from my fathers , that where
he spend most of his time .

I was to lazy and tied to watch TV so I played music and my father Jimy Dludlu cd started playing , I
smiled to my self as I thought about the good time i had with my father , I was on the couch going
trough my pics at shame I looked hot yesterday , i still can't believe it me.
I must have fallen asleep because I found my self being hit by a cold breeze , I rubbed my shoulders , I
was in my fathers art gallery , I walked around touching his paintings admiring , u stopped when saw one
painting that looked like me , I had braids on my face looked sad , Mvelo was behind me and his back
was facing me , he was hugging someone , I cold only see her arms and hands , Mvelo broad shoulders
were hiding her face , the painting was dark and spoke volumes ...I ran my hands on it , the girl in the
picture looked like me but was so sad

Him : sana lwami ... "

I turned and looked behind me

Me : baba Ka Sbahle "

Him : you are a women now , a wife "

Me : I'm not ready baba I'm so scared "

Him: "im proud of the young women you turned out to be "

I started crying

Him : its OK baby I'm always with you ..."

Me : he sold me baba ungidayisile for his riches baba Ka Sbahle ... "

He held my face

Him : ...Mnguni is good man ... He was chosen for you trust him and stop this hate you have over my
brother , its weighing down on you "
Me : kodwa baba"

He shook his head

Him : don't be your own enemy and carry other peoples burden live for Sbahle now , uyinkosazane yaka
Bhengu and soon to be indlovukazi yaka Mnguni "

Me : I'm scared baba "_

Him : because you confined by the walls you have build around yourself , Mntanami I understand and
trust me it totally makes sense why you did it but it’s not always worth it. If you allow yourself to let
loose and trust yourself and others, you’ll find some of the deeper parts of yourself."

Me : I don't know how to love baba Ka Sbahle "

Him : follow your heart , stop listening to your stubborn head..."

I smiled and looked down

Him : I'm proud of you my child you are so blessed... one day you will realise that ...I love you so much "

Me : ungahambi ngiyakucela "

Him : angiyindawo ... " He pulled me into a hug and I felt so worm , I heard someone calling my name ...
" Sbahle Mani " I opened my eyes it was Didy she was standing in front of me

Me : yini ?"

Her: just wake up will you ?"

Me : did you have to scream that loud kodwa ? "

She rolled her eyes and pulled me by the hand , I hate that look , she is up to something

She dragged me up the stirs ,

Me: where we going ?

Her : Come and see " she took me to the second floor she opened the balcony sliding door

we stood their and looking outside

Me : so what am I looking at vele ? " i saw cars parked by the royal BnB , with few guys sitting there "_:

Zim : jonga mtasi , he’s here" she had a bowl of food in her had this girl and food kodwa

Me : bani ?"

zim : your future bae"

My mouth just dropped, what the fuck is he doing here ?

Didy: looks like they did not leave , he is so cute look at him ? "

Me: uphi ? I see lot of people"

Didy : well he is somewhere in the mix

SHe giggled and I playfully hit her

Me : so why so many cars ? what happening ? Are they having a party "

zim : its looks like it's you engagement after party and he bought the most cutest guys ever ... Ooh
mtasi I so love you right now "

She laughed ,. I did not find that amusing at all , how could she say such a thing,

Zim: hawu kutheni sisi ? why now with that face?

I sat down

Me : why do I have to marry that guy , why me out off all the royal girls in this country he chose me ?"_

Didy : why not you , did you see how hot you are , you too look so good together , lalela ... Stop this pity
party you playing because umguni usekuthathile "

I looked at her and we laughed Dudu might be very odd but she always makes me laugh and make feel
super ok ,

Zim : so lets freshen up and go to the mall and buy ice cream "

Didy : as all as you buying "

Zim: money ithi tata kumi dali "

We bust out and laughed

Me : where is Nwabisa ?
Didy : i don’t know but she left her car maybe uka gogo"

I rolled my eyes and I went to take a shower while Dudu and Zim stood by the balcony , this two
bayawathanda amadoda , they can't even see whose there but there amused by the fancy car’s and
how good the guys looked "_

After I took a shower an lotion my self I gathered my strength to do my hair well I got long hair but mom
decide I put a weave on its long black thick and curly have no clue what to do with it ,I just let it be ,
decided to wear black skirt with slit on the side , black and white long sleeve top, black kicks ,

i knew the girls will take forever to finish so I went to the kitchen and made my self a sandwich . . I
wanted to get out of here the house was suffocating me and this hair was irritating , I could not shake
the dream I head it felt so real the pain and hurt , I wonder if I will love Mvelo and he will turn around
and brake my heart by being with another women or does he has another women already , the fucked
up thing about arranged marriage is that there is no transparency ... So I may be getting my self into
drama and heartache nje ... I sigh

Dudu : OK asambe "

Me : yoo you look too fashionable to be seen with me in public " she just looked at me

Zim showed up talking to her phone and when she looked at me

Zim: got an emergency to attend too will talk later"_ she dropped the call

Zim: uqokeni ?"

Oh God not this again ,

Me : I'm not changing already I'm forced to wear a skirt because my in-laws are still in town so zip it nje "

Didy : sisi wami il teach you few things about fashion

I just gave her a bored look

Didy :

1st – never leave the house like you going ema” simini “

2nd – never wear clothes just to cover your body

3rd –you must learn dress an make a statement – usleye sisi !!!!!!!!!!!!!

Zim : yes girl " they high five

Me : I don't care angilahli angicoshi ... Besides my husband use Khethile khethile ..."

Zim : I feel sorry for this man kodwa "

We all laughed

Me : can we go before I change my mind "

I went to a garage and started the car , the girls forced me to put shades on but I just used them to
move my hair from my face

I love my moms car. It big , manly, black and so sexy its always a pleasure to drive ,bmwX6 SUV it just
makes me look and feel powerful .

Dudu : hawu come on girl stop doing that to your hair "
Me : aish awume dudu iyashisa lento , " I was scratching my head like a mad women and this hair was so
irritating , we drove off lucky the guards did not give us any hustle , the old royal house across the road
looked like they still enjoying left over food and booze from yesterday ,

Dudu : mtasi lets take a shot left ngaka nxumalo

Me : no ways "

Him : come on Sisi just to take a pick kuma guys alaphaya"

Me : guys I'm not going by Nxumalo BnB ... No!"

Zim : come on friend ... Its crowded and nobody will notice us"

Well if they don't know when I say no is no today they will know , I drove to the mall , I looking at my
friends all grumpy and I just laughed , I finally packed at the mall

Zim : uyabhora shame Mgani "

Me : you promised me ice creams " I jumped out of the car with the car Keys I almost fainted when I
bumped into some one...it a chest .... No ... Not that smell... his cologne

Can it be my husband ... No I left him behind ... I was to nervous to raise my head , shit do I even look
decent to be in public ? Ooh crap my had scarf ... And the bloody Blunkett ... Why did I leave the house ,
I could hear my heart beat no no it his , he is standing right in front of me , I stepped back looking down ,
it sign of respect right

maybe just maybe he will not make a big deal out of my behavior , his hands were on his pocket , he
was warring black jeans , black top, hold up his walking on foot ...I looked up I noticed that this was no
top but muscle t-shirt his hair was lose thick and full of life he smiling , and I could see a trace of dimples
, I looked in his eyes and I got lost I'm not sure if there hazel mix with grey and light brown colour they
hypnotizing, I felt dizzy by looking at him , it was not helping that his thick eyebrows with eyelashes that
could cover you from the rain was also on show , he had big eyes looked a bit lazy to open them today,
his smile widen and i could see heaven oh God is there anything wrong with lomuntu he has the most
beautiful smile i ever seen his teeth white and his dimples complimented him .

Him : hi "

Me : hello

to lazy to edit guys askis but promised is promise - hope you enjoy ...

Chapter 13

Mvelo /Trevor

Trey ****

I looked on social media and notice that my soon to be wife got followers now , her life is going to be
turned upside down , some were hating on her and some loving her pics of Umemulo ceremony , she
got beautiful body I must admit ... I looked her wearing isidwaba and lot of beads that was suppose to
hide her breast but i could tell she had perfect cups

I smiled and looked at her other pics yep

I'm kind of stoking her I must say she's too boyish, I like that she does not do the smile thing that girls
do when they take pic take numerous pics just to have that perfect one she will post my girl here does
the opposite

she just do a lot of crazy and funny face got me laughing to my self ,I noticed that she's also not that
much of a phone user because she is hardly on line and never talks , ... Its like she is living under a rock.
I look at her number again and stop my self from dialing , it was already after mid night and she got me
wishing to here her voice ..

I just wish I could just have a few minute conversation with her she is too shy and believes in the laws of
our tradition , I wish she can be free around me , judging from this pics i see I can tell she's funny and a
breath of fresh air , she is different from the girls I have been with , she is a beautiful tomboyish kind of
girl , no wander Zoe likes her she more of her type.

I'm eager to know her on personal level . I don't know when sleep came but I was woken up by loud
laughter

I kissed my peaceful sleep goodbye as I waited for my door to open and boom the door swung open and
Menzi and Nkonzo walked in ,

Menzi jumped me in my bed and hugged me is this guy crying ? For crying out loud?

Him :congratulations my boy .."

Me : what are you guys doing here "

Nkonzo : to light a cigar and say congratulations for getting the girl "

Me : what " he also hugged me

" don't light up a cigar to new Dad's the man just got engaged all ready you foresee a baby in his life "
Bright walked in, I dropped my mouth , now that's the guy I got to jump and hug

Me : I thought you in Miami "

" and miss this.... fuck Miami " he said , his even taller then me now
Menzi : I can't believe we race here "

Nkonzo : and I worn ... Ngicela ibhodlela lami "

Menzi : you basically cheated you riding a bike it doesn't count '

Nkonzo : you said who ever get here last izoncolisa itafula bike or car so pay up ""

Menzi : Bright you heard the man sorry "

Bright : how did you expect i race guys you forgot that i was in wheelchair for year because of car
accident how do you expect I race without fear "

I laughed , seeings this guys in one room made me grateful of the company that i keep even though I
know Mbali is behind it all , she said it in passing last night and looks like she made it happened

Honest fact I was shocked and excited , last time we gathered like this was on my birthday last year and
we partied for a month ... And that Got me in deep waters with my Uncle after...

Mbali bought breakfast and told me that Austin , Gogo and mama are at the royal house something to
do with a meeting regarding the ceremony to be held in few days time , koki says its waist of money and
want the Bhengu to agree to infuse that with the royal wedding , I have no say in this stuff so I truest
her and mama.

Menzi : she is hot bro "

They were looking at Sbahle pic on my phone

Nkonzo : and looks like the Memulo pics are in the net now ...she's got followers "_
Bright : nami I want an arranged wife bro. I would not mind waking up next to lips like that every
morning "_

Menzi : you know what they say about women with thick lips ... They swallow it whole "

Bright : ooh brother that just gave me Bonner "

Me : Bright kuzonyiwa you can't be holding my phone and talking shit about my wife fuck off bring back
my phone "

Bright : you know you got a women right there that will make you want to do sex tape with her and give
it to your friends just to show off "

They all bust out and laugh

Zoe : OK boys enough about the Mrs Mnguni , .... Really is that how you see her just a sex object "

Zoe walked in wearing white track pants and vest

Menzi : mpintsi yami "

They hugged and she greeted every one else ,

Bright nudge me " who is she ..."

Me : my little sister don't touch her husband shoots first and ask question later "

Bright : I don't care ... I don't mind taking a bullet for such beauty "

Zoe waved her ring at him

Zoe : find your own ..." She took mbali plate and walked back to her room "

Mbali : Trey I told you I will make it happens step out and pay me my money ,_I heard car tires spinning
and lot of whistling

Me : fuck no "

I ran out and yep it was the one and only my brother in law Sbu spinning his Red Gti

"

Him : Pretty boy " he said jumping out of his car , it true what they say you may rehabilitate a guy but
you can't take the gangster our of him , he looked like your typical tsotsi boy from elokshini ,

Me : I hate that name "

Him : I know" we bro hugged and he wished me congratulation ,

Him : told this fools I'm going to the Bay to skinny deep and they followed me , hope you don't mind "

It was Two other car , I heard Zoe scream OK its Langa Zoe husband and his brother Banz

The Dlamini boys with big cars damn really we took the chill session outside This guys were loud and
now I fear what my in-laws will say about the company I keep .

Zoe and Langa decided to go to the beach

Sbu car was pumping loud deep house music , cooler box and booze everywhere its not even 14:00 and
already it part for days ..
I sent a text to Austin that he must take koko and Mama to the hotel , showed him a pic of situations
and he agreed ...

I jumped into a shower later on took quick bath. I decide to were black cargo pants and muscle T-shirt ,
while I was looking for my socks my phone ringing

" sir inkosazana iyaphuma manje "

I had bribed one of the Bhengu Guards to update me with any move that Sbahle will take I was not
planning on leaving this place without engaging with her

Me : uthi uyaphi ? "

Him ; ezitolo ... " Shit! I ran out and stood by the road when i notice that her car was not driving this
side I ran back to the yard

Me : shit "

Bright : smoko "

Me : iFro just left her house ... "

I jumped into Sbu car that was playing music , and bright jumped in

Menzi : and then ?

Me : I coming back "_ spread off

Bright : is she driving that beast "

Me : I guess so becaouse number plate is personalised as Ma Bhengu "

She changed lane and pass other car , wow this Lady drives crazy

Him : I like her already "

I gave him a look

Him : what I like her for you ... She is my friends wife after all " I followed her and she drove straight to
the mall she packed and I packed behind her , i brushed my face with my hands and stepped out when I
was about to knock on her car window she stepped out , she looked so cute on her outfit she is showing
a bit of skin as well , she was laughing and bumped into my chest i just dropped my mouth open , I
taught I was imaging thing but my expression was much better then the girls with her they were totally
drooling ,

Girl 1: ohhh my God his so hot ! " :

Girl2 shoooooooooooooooo!!! Don't spoil the moment “

I could hear them as the spoke but the intoxicating smile and beautiful girl before me who looks flawless
with no make up , she smell of fruit you know that girly smell Chanell no 5 perfume , she was looking
down , she noticed my feet since I ran out of the house with no shoes on , she slowly rose her head , it
was the most sexiest thing to look at , slow motion , it felt like I was looking at her for the fist time ,
hold up I was infect , she literally took my breath ways , her mesmerizing beauty , she has small eyes
with thick lashes that made it look so exotic , her pink pouted lips so juicy, My words could not describe
this angel in front of me , she finally looked at me and for the fist time i saw how her eyes looked like
there were the most sexiest thing ever seen, I think I'm addicted to them ,I looked at her as she moved
the hair from her face , she did the frown with her mouth and that alone made me smile , she stepped
back from me and I finally breath in and out and found courage to say

“ hi “

Her : “ hello “
 Ok that how her voice sounds like , it a bit husky and very soft , she looked down and blushed , she too
beautiful , My Queen , the women I will pledge my inter life too , I could not have ask for any better
way to meet her , this felt like me meeting her for the fist time

Me : how are you Sbahle “

She could not look at me , she wanted the ground to swallow her I was not moving from here till we can
finally engage on a topic or something ,

Her : “ ngiyaphila “

She bit her lower lip

Me : so you not going to ask me how I’m doing ? “

Her : “ oh ! im sorry … how are you doing … ? “

Me : “ nami ngiyaphila … “

I stood there trying to think what to say next I studied her body language and respect her personal
boundaries, there is no reason to come off as creepy but I so wish that her small eyes can just look at
me one more time . The most important thing I can do is to be respectful and follow her lead now
Walking up to a girl you’ve never spoken to before is like taking a dip in an icy water , It makes you
nervous. But as a guy, knowing how to approach a girl is one of the most important things to know in
the dating world but I'm fuckin married to this girl so one way or the other we need talk

Girl 1:wow look who's blushing , that must be a good sign "_

Sbahle looked at her bored , yep my wife got attitude

Girl 1 : hi my name is Dudu but you can call me Didy "

She extended her hand for a hand shake

Me :ooh hi , " shook the hand briefly

Didy : wow your hands ,you have a tight grip do you work out ?"

I looked at this girl almost clicking my tongue and wish she could just stop with his nonsense

Sbahle :Didy please …."_

Me : nop I woke up like this “ I said dismissing her

I looked at Sbahle and side smiled , she blushed and looked away

" I'm Zimkhithi "

Me : oh OK" I was getting bord can't I get just one moment with Sbahle without this fly , I'm sure my
face was evidence that I'm annoyed

Bright came to my rescue the minute they recognized him they went gaga on him

Zim girl " ooh my God Dj Bright "

Him : in the flash Nana " the screamed

And walked to him , I breath out loud as in sigh of relief,

I hate girls who are forward and they were making Sbahle uncomfortable
I folded my hands and looked at her

Me : so ... I kinda of follow you here ...and I must say you drive like you running from cops or something
"

She lifted her head to look at me , OK I love how her face looks right now

Her : I do not ..."

SHe laughed I felt butterfly’s in my stomach , at least we getting to that chat now

Me : I don't know ... I even forgot to put on my shoes running after you "

She giggled wow she really has a beautiful set of teeth and that one big smile , for minute there you
could not tell she had small pouted lips

Me : wow she smile well I guess my work is done here "

She shook her head

and our eyes locked

Bright : guys you will meet us inside "

zim and didy walked with him and Sbahle looked at there direction

I stood by her car resting my back on it i looked at her

Me : well that out of the way so uyaphi mkami with this two ?" She did the face and I found myself
laughing ...

To be continued ***

Chapter 14

not edited at all

Sbahle

So here I was standing next to my so called husband who forgot his shoes while running after me , konje
why is he running after me vele ? Also

I was not sure what he meant about why I'm here or why his calling me " mkami " aint we jumping a
gun a bit , he is too casual about us and this arranged thing we in , while I debate on how must i put my
guard down , I have never had a one on one session with a guy before,

I see his mouth moving his talking and laughing I pretend as if I'm listening I still do know what expected
of me ,

where do we start with this chat his in forcing, what must I really do ?, he all ready laughed at me when I
give him my confused face , well I have no control of that it just in my nature nje, I do this faces when I
laugh , confused , thinking or just being silly , I hate it when people look at me and tell me how beautiful
I am so I prevent such comments by pulling a face. His starring again and I don't know what his look is
doing to me but I end up looking down , Mvelo is young but he carries an aura of a grown man I'm not
sure if its because of his tittle of being a king or what ? Or maybe there is more to that I'm not peaking
up , his very traditional this beads on his Wrist and sea shells.
Him : you drifting away again ... Why you traping your self in your own head I'm right here why don't
you ask me anything so we can get this ball rolling "

I'm tongue tight right now , shit I hate this

Me : may I please seat down " I finally say we have been standing next to my mothers car for a while
now , I feel like I will should strike a conversations with him should be seated I'm already disrespecting
him for standing and looking him in his exotic eyes.

Him : sure ... I'm really sorry you want to sit in the car or should we go inside "

I look at his feet and he bust out and laugh , throwing his head back , his top is lifted and I see his Ck
briefs and this V-line on his lower waist, his really muscling I found my self feeling uncomfortable.

Him : you can see I have no shoes on can we at least seat in the car , I'll order something to eat or drink
or better yet will go to drive trough "

I nodded I opened the car but he stood in front of the door jizz what now ?

Him : let's use my car please "

OK its officially he controlling , I nodded and he open the passenger door for me of his car and , I looked
at him closely as he ran to the drivers side , yoo muhle yena , sexy , buffed up and too arrogant , yaah I
notice the way he dismissed Didy and Zim , he was rude yebo there are annoying but let me be the one
to put them in there place not him , I felt his hand on my thighs oh no he didn't

Him :been calling you ..."

I looked at hand on my thigh and at him.

He removed his hand shook his head , wow his annoyed he even has one eyebrow raised cute but I
could tell his pissed

Him : Sibahle again I'm right here , can you at least try to talk to me then to that little person in your
head "

Did he just indirectly call me a psychopath ?

Him ; OK maybe its me I'm doing something wrong ... yini am I boring you ?"

I looked down if I disrespect him now who knows what he will do now , ooh god help me now , I rose my
head and looked at him and smiled ,

Me : I have never done this ... Mnguni , I'm really sorry you being here next to me is a bit uncomfortable
"

Him : wow say that again " he was smiling from ear to ear , hold up what did I do ?

I pulled my upper lip up and he laughed

Me : uxolo angisiswanga uthi uMnguni angiphindeni "

He brushed his well streamed bead

Him : my brother in-law once telled me that being called by yo clan name or surname by a women is just
a beautiful feeling ... I like it "

I breath out loud , ooh that , silly of me

Him : and Sbahle try to relax I don't bite and I'm not clued up about tradition and laws of arranged
marriage right now I'm just a guy trying to talk to a women I'm arranged to spend my life with , so
please don't be afraid to be your self "

I nodded , its either his genuine about with this or its a trap I'm just going to keep my guard up for now
till I know fore sure

Him :Two Chicken grilled foldover , 2 big Mac with extra cheese ..." He was ordering for the two of us ,
did he ask me what I want to eat No ! He only asked if I'm allergic to anything next thing we in drive
trough ordering for me , haybo will I ever have a say in this relationship?

Him : I hope you don't mind I orders for you "

Me : its OK " fuck yeah I mind ...but I can't even pin point anything that I don't like in here , I will let this
slide for now .. Just because he ordered my favorite food .

We drove out a parked at the bay looking at the sea I felt very calm I could breath the feeling I have right
now its so amazing I don't know why I have this strange relationship with water ,

He looked at me smiled

Him : come " I opened the door an we set on the car bonnet the sea breeze got me closing my eyes and
taking it all in I felt like hamming a song I felt so alive .

Him : so tell me who's Sbahle "

I laughed , this time around I was not faking at all , I was relaxed

Me : that a direct question "

Him : shoot me for wanting to know about my Queen " the awkwardness that we had few minutes back
was gone. I found my self relaxed as ever “Guess it’s time for 20 questions,” i joked and he laughed as
well , conversation was flowing , even forgot that I'm arranged to marry him ,

What was he doing charming me by asking about my future gaols , my friends, my interests, what I did
for fun? Telling me funny stories about his life in the UK? I had always maintained that I would prefer
any other country to the UK. It was too far from everyone I knew, too familiar and alien all at once. But
after eating a ton of food with him it did not seem so inconceivable. This was going seriously sideways. I
was actually enjoying myself.

Him : my home is in the Ngonyama village but would spend most of my time in the UK , so since you
wish to study Law how about you attend the best university in the UK "

I did take Zoe advise and thought of studying Law even did a survey on my self trying to check if it the
right career path to my shock it was , But to decide the rest of my life should unfold I cab not say yes to
anything now , o can make life changing decision based on one meeting i just had with my future
husband , it will seemed unfair to me beside I was the one who would have to leave my home, my
family and everyone I knew. I was the one who would have to change cities, countries and hemispheres.

Me : I don't know ..."

Him : you first need to see my home And you can make a decision there after how is that ? "_

I just nodded ,

The day was interrupted by my phone ringing it was Nwabisa , my heart skip a bit , Nwabisa is straight as
an an arrow and act like our mother ,

Her : ukuphi ? "

She mad , she I shouting

Me : I'm in the mall "

Her : get your ass here your father wants talk to you"

Me : his not my father !"

Her : this not the time to argue, get here now!!"

She dropped the phone on me , I sigh and looked Mveli he had a concern look

Him : are you ok "

Me: yes I am ... I'm sorry but a have to go "

Him : come let's go wash you feet ' I had to take off my shoes as well so we can walk on the sea sure ,
the feeling of his hands washing my feet felt so soft , he took of his T-shirt and wiped my feet , his body
is sculptured ooh , his chest big and broad he has tattoo of lion head on his left shoulder

Him : you like it ? " I smiled and nodded

I can't believe I just touched his shoulder

Me : why a lion heard "

Him : its represent the beat inside of me "

I was confused about his response but something in me told me his one with lion , it was in his way he
looked at me right now , I just melted

Him : this feels like a Cinderella story when the clock strike midnight you have to go hone "
Me : the only twisted part is that I'm not leaving my shoes behind "

He laughed , and we walked back to the car , I asked him to drive he asked why and told him got mad
love for sport cars ,

Him : you sure you not Zoe twin sister "

I laughed

Him : you two are so alike "

Me : funny because she said that as well "

We laughed I like Zoe too she just the kind if person I will hang out with , driving a Gti with this horse
power I was tempted to speed off ,

Him : I'm too young to die and we still need to make babes slow down please" I laughed and speed off ,
the minute I parked he jumped out catching his breath

Me : you ok "

He just waved a hand at me holding on his knees i texted Didy that I'm in parking

Him : may I please see you tomorrow "

I looked down and nodded. What started as bed day turned our to be lot of fun , we hugged , OK that
awkward moment came again ,

Didy : zim is drunk and I think bright fuck her the toilet so nje I'm pissed "
Bright : you know we could have had three some "

Didy gave him a finger

Bright : love you too Nana , I will marry you you watch and See "

Zim : what ?"

Bright : you'll be me side snack "

Me : Zimkhithi asambe , thank you light ... For hanging with them"

Bright : its Dj bright everybody knows me "

I rolled my eyes " well I don't but thank you any way , "

Mvelo bust out and laughed w

Bright : you know you to deserve each other "_I gave him the face like what ever we all got in the car
Mvelo placed his elbows on my window , his too close I could feel his breath on my face

Mvelo : thanks for today "

I just smiled " thank you too "

Him : safety first "_he pulled the seatbelt and strap me , all along I was holding my breath ,

Him : I'll call you later pick up ok "

I nodded he step back after saying goodbye and i drove off he just stood there looking at me drive away"

Didy must be really pissed she never keeps quite this long , we found Nwabisa on the gate walking up
and down " nivelaphi ?" She jumped in the car , she was shouting and I was so tired for her drama ,
when we walked inside the house we found my Aunts and my Mon on the sitting room "

Nwabisa : siyaxolisa ukubuya ngalesisikhathi we misplace the car keys ..."

Mom laughed , way to go Nwabisa that was not convincing and why is she saying we , unless she wanted
to use us as her decoy as well

to be continued ...t

Zihlobo zami not that I'm hating on Sli or anything but this book is about Sibahle ... the title says it all ...
and if you still remember I did say that Trey and Sli Pov will only be featured in this book ... before we
start jumping the gun as if y'all know what going happen next let's walk with Sbahle in her journey
because its got lot of twist ... so let's like / share page and comment

chapter 15

unedited

Sbahle ***

I just enters my room after telling Zim how disappointed I am with her , and she was not drunk just tipsy
, she told me that she did not sleep with the Dj but they bamboozled around trying to make Didy
jealous , Because she was playing hard to get and the Dj really liked her , I wanted to believe that so
much but my friends track record with man is giving me doubt to this statement , I took off my shoes I
set on my bed and touched my foot and toes

" do you even use this to walk with "

" why do you say that ? "

" you got beautiful soft feet and Legs " he ran his hands on my leg

, I smiled replaying that moment in my head , I looked at my toes and smiled , I still can not shake the
fact that I had half naked man crouching before me wiping my feet with his t-shirt wow , that something
you only see in movies , was I flattered oh fuck yes I felt like the princess that I really man .

There was something about his Tattoo that captivated me , that tattoo kind off spoke to me in some
kind of way I found myself touching it , it made me see a glimpse of who Mvelo is I smiled thinking about
today the way he paid attention to my every move kind moved me is some kind of way .

" mmmm my baby is smiling to herself .. Should I be worried " mom said standing by my bedroom door

Me : you so dramatic maka Sbahle "

Her : if you say so ... Come help me with supper "

I frowned

Her : woza and stop pulling your face at me "

I put on my sleepers and followed her ,

Her: baby today we had a long meeting with the Mnguni "

I continued to grate carrots as she spoke

Her : Dlomvukazi says that the wedding is mid December "

I looked at her that in like two / three weeks from now

Her : I'm worried baby "

Me : mama that too soon "

Her : they is a lot you still do not know about being a wife or even being a Queen baby how am I going to
teach you all of this thing in short period ? “ she stooped what she was doing and set down ,

My mother worried that she had brought me up too leniently. She had encouraged me to study abroad,
travel and live a life different from hers. She hoped it wouldn’t backfire now. She was asking me to
consider the conventional institution of marriage topped off with the traditional customs of the
arranged marriage.

My mother pointed out that she knows that the Ndlovukazi is a good women , she prays that her
grandson took after her , she told me she had met with Mvelo Gran years back she had met her
through my father, and she believes this arranged marriage was orchestrated by my father years ago .
Everything she said was making sense they paid my uncle a fortune for him to agree in my hand in
married , my uncle did state that he doesn’t know how the Mnguni knew about me or my existence but
were willing to pay a fortune for me , but why ?.

Her : Adulthood involved hard changes I'm sorry baby you have to go through this at this young age you
in “

Me : I guess it life " I said in law voice , nothing surprises me anymore about decisions that are taken
about my life without my consent , Ill just lay low and take the blows for now , only God knows when
will I ever rise from this .

I was deep in thought and did not realise that I was cocking a storm Looks like I took over my mother's
kitchen because I was the only one cooking now , she was to emotional and talking non stop about her
doubts and fears of this arranged marriage

Her : I wish I can have a talk with that boy “

Me : “ his a king maka Sbahle and you know very well that our laws forbids that a mother in-law to have
private meetings with the daughters husbands and worse his also king " She nodded thoughtfully .

if I did not spend time with Mvelo today I would be thinking of running for the hills but he looks like a
good guy but i can not base that on just one meeting I had with him , There are no guarantees of success
or failure to this arranged agreement . I understand my mother concern she will not be there I will be
alone she wish she could give me her wisdom , perseverance heart and knowledge of out customs .

In the end, I decided to put my faith in myself I’m not a failure , not a pushover I got power to rise in
every situation I'm faced with , at the end of it all I need to rely on me.

After cooking I dish up and set the table , I was not hungry so I faked a headache and went to my room
, I took a shower I just washed my body and my mind took a wrong turn , I started thinking about Mvelo
his captivating eyes and smile and the way his face is always serious , the guy never laughs , his funny no
doubt but focus and sombre , he commands respect when he speak and that alone makes me worry
about how I will control my opinionated mouth .

So here I was taking a shower because I could not drown myself in the tub due to this fake hair in my
head , why do women put this shit on vele ? I clicked my tongue and tried to enjoy taking a bath
standing , which was very impossible , I closed my eyes pictured the ocean but I saw powerful waterfall
instead

“ you are ready never doubt yourself , you Born to be a Queen , Everything you want is on the other side
of fear."

This voice echoed I shoot my eyes open looked around , it was not familiar voice but it was a female
voice , i opened the sliding door , trying to see who is in the room with me , but notice that I was all
alone , I jumped out took a bathrobe and rushed to my bedroom attending to my phone that was
ringing my favorite song got me singing to it before I could answer

~~~

Shitted on 'em,
Man I just shitted on 'em

Shitted on 'em,

Put your number two's in the air if you did it on 'em

All these bitches is my sons ~~~

Me : hello “

“ hay … did I call at the bed time ? “

Aagg ! its Mvelo made a promise to call back and he did ok , tick for keeping a promise

Me : “ no I just got out of the shower right now “

Him : “ ooh hope you did not trip trying to answer my phone call “

I rolled my eyes as he snickered

Me : “fortunately I did not “

There was silence and I thought he was not there

Me : “ hello “

Him : “ I just had a talk with my Grandmother … “

Me : “ oh “

It was so kind of him to called me and ask if I have given my assent to the wedding being moved to
closer date . He wanted to be sure and to check with me that I had not been unnecessarily influenced, I
found it amusing,

Does he know that I’m considered most headstrong by my family member im the one who could not be
forced to do anything I did not want to do. I was moved by his consideration , but yet again as a women
in this household I have no say , my first thought was to tell him that , this marriage ,is not arranged but
forced and I don’t want to go along with it , but yet again that will only be fear and insecurity talking ,
what do I have to lose , Mvelo has already promised me a new life , to study abroad to be myself and
point out my views , my voice was always caged in this house and i have lived in my head so long that I
made it my permanent residence it time to break free . maybe the dream was right I need to break the
wall that shield my emotions.

Me : “ Mnguni does it matter at all when I will be getting married to you , I can disagree with them and
say it too soon , but a year or two down the line it will still be hanging over our heads … besides my
mother speaks highly of your grandmother and I don’t know what she wants the reunion to be so soon
but I believe that she has only Good intentions “ I hope I said inwardly , He breath out loud , as if he was
holding his breath that got me smiling.

We talked more about life and he told me that he has his friends over , they showed up un announced
to celebrate his engagement party I could tell by the noise that they parting Jesus man and alcohol

Me : “ how do you feel about all of this you never told me ? “ I was talking about the arranged union
Him : “ it came as a shock … but I could not run away from fate … I’m the last leaving man in my family ,
I feel like I need to plant a new seed for a new family tree to grow , for that to happen I need a queen /
wife and mother to my children , I’m too young for such responsibility but I learned the hard way that
we do not always get what we plan to have in our lives “

Me : “ what might that be ? “

Him : “Most of us fantasize about meeting an amazing person, dating her for a good time, informing the
parents about it, getting everyone’s approval and finally tying the knot. That’s the definition of a perfect
love marriage for many, right? It’s the stuff of fairy tales and most dream about but we of royal blood
our Future is written in the hands of the ancestors and elders … our direction are shifted because
destiny and fate “

I nodded as if he could see me

Him : “ hay I’m also scared , nervous … its my first time being husband to someone as well , fuck I don’t
even ,know what expected of me , but ,I guess will need to work on that together what do you say ? “

I laughed

Me : “ I will like that “

We talked about general stuff hobbies and he got me laughing like a lunatic after 45 minutes we said
goodnight , I laid on my bed facing up smiling till the dream I had this morning came rushing back ,
what did it mean? can the very same man who put a smile on my face seconds ago be the one who will
break my heart in million pieces ? the portrait said it all , I was heartbroken and he was hugging another
, reality kicked in we not in this for love , its arranged.

my uncertainties and doubts about Mvelo swung from the ridiculous to the unexciting revelation , I
have only seen the sociable, pleasant side of him. What if he was an Ex murderer? A possessive jerk?
What if he did not give me room to breathe? What if he is in love with someone else a crazy ex ? What if
he was disorganized? Or too particular? How would I have to adjust my personality to fit someone
else’s? Will I be able to live with this man? Will I be able to love him? .

To be continued … you know what to do

chapter 16

unedited

.
Trey ***

So after spending three days in Richards Bay I had to start work. My uncles instructions , it was not easy
running a multi million dollars company and shadowing my uncle , from the looks of it , it was big shoes
that I got fill , I'm grateful for Austin for making me do my articles on my 3rd year because what left to
do now is to get my result , graduat practice full-time, I just had a taste of the coat room few days back
and dam I loved it I'm exited being on the office feels so wow , maybe its because its my first job but and
I'm all hyped out about it. My uncle plays to win and leaves no stones unturned so I need to put more
work to put my name on the mark . So its official I'll be working in the UK branch , and making endless
trip home .

My Wedding is in few days time and I’m flying back home as we speak , I'll first need to pick up Zithelo
from her mons house i was planning on spend this few days with my little princess I also need to find a
way to tell her that Me and mommy are not together anymore and daddy is getting married , I hope she
is not crazy like Pam and throw tantrum , because I have no clue what I will do next, last thing I ever
wish to do is to hurt my little girl that’s why I'm trying my level best to be the best dad, talk to her
everyday , buy her gifts and always remember her favourite cartoon character.

I kinda miss my Queen , the last time i spent time with Sbahle it was on the weekend of her memulo /
Zibizo , I wanted so badly to tell her about Zithelo and Sli , but there was never a good time no moment ,
she was a bit distance and cagy and I had to rush back home , till this day I have no idea what me and
Sbahle have , today she is hot , tomorrow we cold the next day we not talking to each other , she
challenges me and I feel like I have meet my match.

The few days I spend with Sbahle I noticed that my wife to be has temper for days , yooooh! She quite
no doubt but when she speak she spit venom , she is hot headed , she has wormed up to me and we talk
a lot over the phone , but damn she's crazy , she is straight talker and does not sugar quote shit, can
you believe that it just been a week with her but we have fought a million times , she told me her terms
and conditions of this marriage basically she put me in her lane , I have never seen a girl who is not
taken by my handsome looks you know every time when I get to close or flirt with her she put a wall
and shut me out , frankly I'm tired of trying I aren’t the one to beg for love , when she finally grows up I
will be waiting for her she is my stubborn hot-headed crazy wife after all , I told you that she no fragile
lamp she the wolf itself under that beautiful futures .
I looked at her pic and smiled ooh how I wish I can watch her whole day whole night hold her and make
her scream till the neighbours come nocking on the door , but well culture say we have the wedding
night to be intimate , not that I'm after sex I really don't mind waiting till she ready.

Menzi : she like Sindy ... You can never win with her until you on top she needs a dick and she will show
you respect " that what my best friend said but how can I initiate sex to a virgin who I have never kissed
and we still waiting for the wedding night to take place next week . . which I doubt it will even happen
at all , ohh my feisty Queen bakithi .

I just arrived in Durban and was looking forward in seeing my daughter that alone put a smile on my face
, I was still not sure if I should stay with Zee in the UK or maybe leave her with koko home , but either
way I need her to be around family. I Have been having bad feeling that what ever Sli is going through is
affecting my daughter , Zee feeds on emotions that her gift , she senses sadness and Channels it to
happiness , but she not getting trough to her Mom , Silindile emotional imbalance is making my baby
sick. She has been in and out of the Dr room and I have been fighting with Sli like world war three . it
toxic what me and her have now , who knew that me and Sli will be like cat and mouse cooperating
couple.

I breath our loud as I stepped out of the plain I was jet leg and tired but just glad that I'm on leave work
is taring , again I need to control my calling , on the other hand Koko need me to take the throne as in
yesterday , Zee needs a full time dad , my crazy wife need my attention , baby mama not speaking to me
, i have no idea how she thinks will cooperant with her attitude towards me ,” Jesus Trey you got
problems “ Sbu will say.

So you all know what happened between me and Sli , we made love and I woke up the next morning to
start something new with Sbahle weeks pass and i come back to claim my daughter , Zee was sick and
no Dr was helping her . my baby mama refused as in she bluntly refused , I have never called her ever
since a few weeks back when I came to check up on Zee we fought again , and we had mad crazy sex
after, I walked away from her it was a mistake I know I shouldn’t have but shit happens .

I call every time I get and I speak to the nanny and Zee only... Nola initiated that act , said I don't need
to confuse Sli I have hurt her enough and she need to move on. . . I don't know how that made me feel
though , sli moving on ... im just stuck between a rock and very hard place , I wish I can officially brake
things off with her but how when she is the mother of my child. I feel like when I walk away I’m killing
her and when I stay I’m hurting her , its just never win-win situation right now .

I'm being unfair to her and Sbahle ooh God if Sbahle funds out I'm screwed , don't got me wrong I'm
not scared of her but I respect my Queen .
, I parked outside Sli house , the last time I was here we fought like crazy when I told her I want to take
Zee to stay with me next year ... Its only fair I mean she had three years to spend with her so I need my
years with her as well , funny because its few weeks before next year and I'm taking her to visit for a
weekend spend time with her cousins ( Pam's kids ) I breath in and out as I stepped out , I buzz the gate
and the help buzz me in , I knocked on the door the help let me in

Her : sir Mis is by the pool area, but baby Zee is taking a nap must I wake her up ?

" no I will make may way to Sli " she nodded and showed me to the back yard, Sli house was huge
modern and deco was beautiful , which makes me think how rich is this women , i found sli on her white
bikini , her flat tummy out there for show as if she never fell pregnant her yellow body was wow she
had shades on a book on her chest , I'm guessing she fell asleep reading , wow this sight here I wasn't
expecting to see , its leaving me with just imagination , only small fabric is hiding her delicate parts I'm
staring too much looking at her sexy body I'm hypnotised , The thing is, visual cues are a major part of
the sexual response to man this is not about me wanting sex from her but just to run my hands on her
body and worship it , her body still has a hypnotic power over me took me to the night when we
conceived Zee shit I already have Bonner , she moves her heard and notice my presence ...I quickly put
my hands on my pocket ." Ohh god " she said almost tripping of the lazy chair ,

Me : I'm sorry to wake you "

She frowned

She took skaf and wrapped it around her body

Her : its ok... Ill go pack for Zi"

She was about to walk out but i held her arm , I hate the tension between us and the fighting it got to
stop , sli has gone trough a lot in her life and I hate to see her cry and especially if I'm the one who's
making her cry

Me : can we please talk before she wakes up "_

I lead her back to the seat and she took out her shades , this women doesn't age at all, I looked at her
even longer than I should till she finally looked away folding her arms , I cleared my throat

Me : uright?"

She just looked at me , this is going to be hard

Women don’t forgive as easily as men do, but if your sorry statement are true and sincere, then you got
your best chances to get a positive response,

Me : firstly I would like to say I'm sorry "

Ever since sli came back to my life my world has been turned upside down , its no lie that I love Sli , of
only she did not leave will be singing another tune right now , I don't know maybe not , I should stop
thinking about what ifs its not helping in this situation at hand , I ran my hands on my face in frustration

Me : how are you ? "

Her : I'm just like how you left me Trevor , broken, mad , angry ... you came back into my life and you
have the nerve to make me the other women "_

Me : ooh that what got you all worked up "

I raised my eye brow

When shes mad she pulls her nose and pulled her mouth to the sided

Her : I know my worth uyezwa " she pointed a finger at me ,

I pulled her finger down and held her hand , our fights never ends well
Her : I'm tired Trey ...I can do this with you any more... "

Her : do what ? ... Last time I checked you not the other women , you the mother of my baby ... So can
we talk like civilized people and stop biting my head off because it turns me on ..."

.to be continued

chapter 17

unedited

Sli ****

I may be in deep sleep but I suddenly felt some one standing over me , I slowly looked up and I was met
by this tall , buffed up guy with dreadlocks , I first smiled thinking I'm a dream but soon realised that its
Trey his here standing in front of me , while I'm half naked ,

Me : ooh God " I stood up and covers my lower body

Me : aaah what are you doing here ? "

I wish I could wipe that smug on his face with a slap

Him : hi Sli" ooh God his doing again giving me mix signals I don't need this right now , why is my lady
part vibrating like this on his sound of his voice , I finally have courage to look at him , oooh take me
Jesus his so Hot... Has he gotten taller now , he was looking at me shit i forgot to greet back , fuck why
must i? I'm still mad at him, I'm angry infect I wish this hold he has over me can be broken , here he was
apologizing holding my hand , sending electrical waves to my heart. He regret being with me I see it in
his eyes , he regrets sleeping with me I can tell by the way he with hold his face after he release inside
of me , he doesn't stay to cuddle.

He must love this girl , but holding on to me for what? , yes we have child together , we had unfinished
business when I left but could it have ended like that ? just another unfinished business ? but I stood so
low for the sake of love , what example am I setting for my baby girl? , I'm the women that makes him
cause adulterer , ooh God knows I never planned This illegitimate relationships, it just happened when I
was emotionally spent and my self-worth was on rock bottom, I was lonely all the time and leave in this
fantasy of me and Trey in love forgetting that being the other woman isn’t just about keeping a secret – I
am the secret."

Funny because this feels like day-javu to me, I have been in this situation before and its happing again
now . Both times, the person had their foot out the door already when I met them and I honestly didn't
know one was in a relationship initially — they just never talked about their significant other. We were
only friendly or binded by something ,

Both relationships ended with me being cheated on or for this instant me being kept a secrete , I'd like
to say it's something I deserved falling for it twice, I really should have recognized the pattern, but the
circumstances at the start of both relationships were so different I hadn't put together that it was the
same thing, I believe Trey loves me he can not treat me like the previous man I use to be with but I
forgot that Trey is a man also now .

His talking about taking Zee and I have no strength to protest he wants to build a happy family with his
wife using my daughter I'm angry the girl is leaving my life , I should be the one that walking down the
Ilse with him , I should be the one trending in social media and newspaper , I invested so much in him
but came back with nothings,

What does this Other Woman have that I don’t? Why is she better than me? Is it because she is
younger, prettier, thicker, richer, sweeter, sexier, kinder, better? I hate focusing on hating her because
it only leads me feeling insecure about my self ,

I have seen her pictures she is sexy , young , beautiful and has status , he post her pics on his social
network , he talks about her to his friends and family his what's profile pic its a picture of them together
, he loves her I see it in his eyes that the love he had for me is slowly fading.
I was really, really jealous she the kind of girl you introduce to your parents , I never thought about her
when we were together. But I did when we weren't, especially if he stood me up because his plans
change and it will only get worse once he marries her

His phone ringed and he smiled , he used to Smile like that to me.

Him : Ndlonkulu " he laughed and stood up , turned his back on me. its her he talks like this to her. He
respect her, and speak deep Zulu to her

He use to call me by my full name lately I'm just Sli , " fuck Sli you don't listen that your Problem " I
wiped a lone tear that escape my eyes , his coming back

Him : I'm busy with something right now but will drive there so we can talk ... I miss you "

He laughed , she must be comic to crack such joke , I walked away my heart was braking , I'm twisted
between absolutely hating myself and hating her. I was jealous of her and I felt terrible about having
such feeling , but yet again when is my happiness coming ? I felt that by choosing to be with him I was
actually choosing what kind of person I was and I didn't particularly like the person I was choosing, but I
really love him.

Him : I have to go , please tell the nanny to drive Zee to Pam's place , I don't want to wake her up now "

I was numb he knows that his sister hates me and I could not say no to that , he hugged me and kissed
my forehead he walked out taking piece of me with him , but how do you make a man love you when
you found him with his one foot outside the door already

.
You know what to do ****

chapter 18

Sbahle ***

weeks passed and I was still not feeling any better , the wedding day was approaching my mom was so
happy , I can't say that about the rest of my family, they believed that I was unfit to be a Queen I know
nothing about culture , yet alone acting like a women ,

“ I don’t know what they saw in you , uyosihlaza nje emzini “

that was the Bhengu Queen my grandfather's 5th wife , she's bitter and always spoke shit about me

“ you have devil's mark on your back , kade ngasho ukuthi you and your mother are witches “ we all
keep quiet and take it in , should it bother me that she doesn’t like me No fam I’m used to this , I know
that my father's side hate me and my mother , the worst part is that they do not even acknowledge that
my mother is married to the so called King ,they constantly treated my mother like a slave ,

The bitter queen is Nwabisa mother , she preferred we speak about Nwabisa wedding that is to
happened next year or never happened at all , looks like the husband she is arranged to marry is not
interested in this whole thing.

But we busy sugar coating the situation for her , she must be glad that she educated and need to start
building her life away from being the Bhengu royalty because that what we are just girls with name and
status nothing special about that .

I don’t mind when the evil Queen stat bragging and making comments about her daughter I hated being
centre of attention anyway , but fact remains that I'm getting married to the most Handsome hottest
coloured guy who looks like a model that got everyone in the going gaga on how he looks , his wealth ,
his accent my aunts will brag, everybody believes and think that I’m the luckiest girl in the world to be
engaged to Mvelo and already I have become a socialite over night with the Medea harassing me, yep
the Mnguni family is highly influential.

So Mvelo returned back to the UK , We chat a lot which was easier than speaking with him face to face ,
he had that aura and appearance about him that scared me a bit when I was around him.

I became more comfortable around him when we talked over the phone , maybe it because of the
distance that I finally let my guard down, i get to tell him everything about my screwed up life , We
Skype , endless phone calls , last week told him I wanted to do my hair and he told me to do braids , I
have learned that his controlling side is a more dominated side of him , we fight a lot because of that ,
yes FAM we fight and we never sleep without resolving our issues , I like that he communicates with me
a lot but his the most moodiest person I have ever known and very possessive but yet sweet king and
living which I appreciated.

He suggested that in each phone call we make , we reveal one thing about ourselves a like or a dislike, a
pet peeve or an characteristic. It did not have to be deeply personal, only what we were comfortable
with. The back and forth was refreshing. It's good to know that i know a glimpse of the man i will marry
now Unlike our face to face conversations that were so awkward , talking to him over the phone there
were no interruptions and its went very smoothly.

But Still, I wondered if Mvelo had any doubts, He must have certain apprehensions about the way his
life was about to change as well. I have notice that in his eyes lays deep secret about his life ,I sense this
at the time we first meet in retrospect, this change of lifestyle must have been hard for him as well. . .
what did he have to give up to feet me in his life , he trying so hard to protect my feelings but always
reassuring me that we going to do this and will make it work.

I was really fed up on seating around at my house , Nwabisa was acting a bit cocky and not so nice this
day I guess her mom got to her and I became the target as if I planned to marry Mvelo , so I avoided
her she always trying act and think she better than me , yooo it's tiring to be here shame because I don’t
give a rat ass about her . Didy left with her mom going on vacation to cape town will only see her on my
wedding Eve oh how I miss her we do chat a lot but its not the same with her not around , its official my
life in this house is boring.

so I decided to take a walk, I did not know where I was going but I decided to just walk till I feel tired , I
sat under the tree by the lake , I set on the bedrock right at the edge of the lake. My toes dip into the
water, I busked on the solar energy and admired mother earth's beauty , wow it was beautiful indeed. I
don’t know what happened but I felt this cold chill on my body and when I looked around the sun was
setting , did I just sleep in the woods , yoh way to go Sbahle.

I must have walked to far from home because it was a hell of a distance to get back home. Walking back
home felt like a decade of torture on my feet , I finally got home found my mother watching TV , she
stop everything and looked at me

Her : where were you ,?"_

Me: just went for a walk and lost track of time "

Her : kodwa Sibahle I was worried and you left your phone behind "

Me : uxolo maka Sbahle "

She looked at me in disbelief , I could not tell her that a fell asleep by the river that was a story my
mother will never buy Her : asibonge nje ukuthi lendoda ayikho or else we would have been talking a
different story "

I looked down and nodded and made way to my room , I undress took a bath and decided to read a
book , I was not even hungry at all , my mother offered me food I just advised her that will eat later ,

My phone beeped it was Mvelo

Him :_hi"

I smiled and type back " hi "

Him : I'm outside "

Ini ! popped my eyes what ?

Him : I told you I will see you today " I looked at my watch it was after 19:00

Me : tough you were talking about video call "

Him : woza ... Stop debating with me , I just drove for 3 hours and I'm jet lag so ... Aish woza Sbahle
please "

I took of my sleep wear ,

put on my above the knee long sleeve grey dress and sleepers , my braids were let loose , running the
stairs I looked if mom was around and luckily she was not in the seating room , i dashed to the door
opened and breath out loud as I was about to reach the gate , the guards did not give Me any hustle
thanks God .

They opened the gate for me to my surprise Mvelo was standing by the gate , he smiled at me and
waved at me to come closer , I started walking with hesitation , as I was walking towards him i noticed
that he was wearing a light grey track pants and grey matching top and Adidas sneakers ,wow I guess
Grey is the colour of the day. he looked so Hot I notice his eyes piercing into my soul, I looked away I
just could not handle the intensity in his look.

Him: hi

He smiled, and I smiled back and looked away

Me: hi, what are you doing here ? “ he engulfed me on a hug and whispered in my ear

Him: I came to see you "

Me : thought you still in the UK "

Him : well surprise "

I giggled .

Me : I’m not supposed to stand in the street with boys you know "

He laughed and put his hands on his pocket

Him: but I’m not just any boy , I’m your fiancé"

He loves Acknowledging that his my fiancé and it's going to be worse once we tie the knot

Me: still, my mom will chop my head if she finds out I was standing on a street with my fiancé who
happens to be a boy"

He laughed

Him : you to tense what's up "

Me : I’m not, I’m just not used to this “

Him : “ there is still a lot I need to teach you then “ the way he said it kind off a gave me tingles on my
spine ,His his eyes were piecing in my eyes he bit his lower lip , I felt a sharp vibrations in my body,
He moved closer to me , I stepped back and he kept on moving closer , till I put my hand on his chest to
stop him ,

Me: what are you doing ?”

his chest felt like a brick I could tell that his ripped up I felt , I quickly moved my hand from his chest , he
lean closer to me he places his mouth on my ear and he whispered

“ you are so beautiful “ and he blew air in my ear and I stepped away , I smiled at him . just when I felt
little butterflies tingling me he unlock his range

He opened the passenger door and looked at me

Him : I don’t want to get you in trouble with your mom , so can we get away from here"

I looked him , and did not know what to do it was late , he handed his hand to me , my heart was
jumping so fast , I walked towards the door and snatched the keys from his hand

Me: I'm driving "

Him : no non no! you trying to kill Me like the last time ... No letha " I shook my head as he chaise me
around the car

To be continued … you know what to do

chapter 19

unedited

Sbahle ****

Sbahle ***

After running few laps around the car , he finally gave in and jumped into the passenger sit I winked at
him and he shook his head looking confused on what just happened , I jumped in the car I was so
excised I was driving a Range , I was touching everything and admiring the car, everything in here was
top notch this car was pimped up I must admit , I looked at my self in the mirror and all along Mvelo
was staring at me

Me: what ?

He laughed

Him: will I ever have car that I will call my own once we married

Me: well what yours is mine hubby “

We laughed

Him: just drive please before I serve you with prenuptial agreement “

I stated the car and I looked at him

Me: so where too ?

He punched in the navigator ,

Him : “ follow the white ladies voice “

I bust out and laughed

I drove off and along the way we stated talking , I felt alive and I smiled and laughed Mvelo told me
about his childhood life and how his life was , he says that my home town reminds him of the northern
west where he grew up , really this man does that place even have an ocean?

Me : “ so you were not born with silver spoon ? “

Him : “ Nop , I only knew about my True identity when I was 18th “

So he did tell me about his calling and frankly I never found it as a taboo , I’m a typical African girl from
Zulu land I know this things just that I have never took time to fully understand them , but I can never
say that you evil or devils worshiper if you have an ancestral calling , My father used to foresee the
future and that gift was passed trough generations , I have dreams that I believe are part of
communication of something that is about to happened , talking about my dream I looked at Mvelo and
debated if I should tell him about it or not , “ you have arrived at your destiny “ the white lady disturbed
my thought ,

I parked the car when I arrived at the destiny I looked outside

Me : sikuphi ? “

it was development estate , new houses where being built here

him : “ come and see “

I jumped out of the car , he held my hand and we walked to one of the houses , the house was
complete , smelled of paint and wood there was no furniture but it was beautiful , there was setting on
the middle of the room , it was candle lit dinner rose petals on the floor and silver leads covering
what’s ever that was served

I held my mouth , I only see this things in the movies ,

Me : “ ooh my God “

Him :” you like it ? “

Me : “ when did you get time to do all this ? “

Him : “ I’m a man full of surprises , don’t underestimate me “

It was indoor picnic kind of thing , rug and cushions on the floor

Me : “ who’s house is this ? “

Him : “ you have lot of questions , come lets eat “

He held my hand and made me sit down

he set down opposite me and looked at me , he was about to open the lead but I stopped him

me : “ ima let me take a pic first “

he bust out and laughed , I took pics and posted it , caption – surprise dinner from my king , my phone
started buzzing like crazy , yoo this vultures are responding now …

him : “ you know that when we get married you need to have a handler “

me : a what ? “

him : “ aish I give up with you …you are too rural “

I hit him with rose petals and he laughed, food was really good , it was mostly meat , pastries and
grilled vegies we ate over light conversation and laughs , and wow the chocolate moose was heaven
every spoon full I will just close my eyes and allow it to melt on my mouth

him : “ I want to tell you something “ I looked at him

me : “ what “

he stood up and scooped me up ,

me : “ uzongiwisa Mvelo “

him : ooh come on relax I got you “ he looked into my eyes and I smiled , I placed my head on his neck ,
we walked outside

The last time a man ever carried me was my father , he loved giving me piggy back rides and to be in
Mvelo arms right now just made me replay those days when my life was so simple , honest fact Mvelo
makes me happy , I’m laughing a lot and talk a lot this days , he just brought a lot of change in my life ,
the anger I use to carry on my shoulders was lifted off . he placed me on the car bonnet of his car and
he slide on top and laid next to me we watched the stars while he played with my hand

him : “ tell me something …. Have you ever been in love ? “

I turned my head and looked at him ,

Me : “ why do you ask … “ I was derailing the question that what I do when I don’t have an answer or
have no clue how to answer his direct questions

Him : “look I’m no expect in such things… “

Me : “ but you have lived to experience It ? “

Him : “ we not talking about me Sbahle “

Me : “ well I am “ he set up straight and raised his eyebrow , his irritated I could tell

Him : “ Sbahle ! “

Me : “ Mnguni “ I saw his mouth curving into a side smile , I enjoy pushing his buttons like this , he
started tickling me

Me : “ no … mvelo “ he was on top of me

Him : “ you know the things you do to me “ a volcano irrupted in my stomach this feeling was back ,
every time when he gets to close I have this foreign feeling , his phone rang on my lap he got of me and
slide next to me

, he took it out the name Sli popped up on his screen his body tensed up I sense that he debated taking
the call but reluctantly answered running his hands on his face

Him : “ hello “

As much as it will be interesting to ears drop and finding out about who is this Sli person calling him at
this hour , I felt it will be right if I give him space , I tried to slide off the car but he held me close ,

Him : “ I’m not home call Pam “

Him : “ I’m not doing this with you right now !“

Him : “ who’s fault is that ? “

…

Him : “ what the fuck!!"

...

Him : stop using emotional black mail it does not work on me “

his voice gave me shivers … I thought I pissed him off but this Sli person is making me see a side of this
guy I have never seen before , he dropped the call after back and fourth of shouting , I was still scooped
under his hold , he looked at me with his eyes red , he slide back and pulled me to lay on his chest , he
breath out loud , I wanted to ask him who was that and what was the call about , but was afraid of his
reaction

Him : “ I need to tell you something “

My heart skip a beat , his heart is raising his about to have a heart attack too , I set up straight and
looked at him.

Him : “what’s wrong ? “

I looked at him and I could tell that he was struggling to tell me this , I had no doubt in my mind that it
has everything to do with this call he just had , strange enough It killed me to see him look this stressed
, he was laughing and goofing around with me few minutes ago and now there is this wedge that is
weighing him down ,

Me : “ please talk to me “

Him : “ two months back I found out that I had a child … a daughter “

I breath out loud

Me : “ I know … “ he did not hear me , he was rambling and talking to fast , he was not making any
sense

Him : “ I swear to god I did not want to keep this from you , I know it was wrong of me to do so , every
time when I tried to tell you the words could not come out … “

Me : “ I know Mvelo … “

Him : I lost three years in her life because her mother actions , it was selfish of me to keep this from
you I know … its like I contradicted my self by saying that we should tell each other everything but I turn
around and keep stuff from you … I’m sorry “

Me : “ I understand … “ he was not even listening to what I was saying he was talking with his hands and
suddenly he stopped and looked at me

Him : “ what did you say ? ….”

Me : “ I know about Zithele , “

“ how ? who told you ?.... Instagram ? “ I shook my head

Me : “ Zoe bit you to it , she made me promise that I don’t confront you about it and you will tell me
when you ready “

Him : “ how long have you known “

Me : “ ever since the first day I meet you “|

Him : “ shit … I'm sorry for not telling you “

Me : “ I understand … “

there was a moment of silence we laid there in the car bonnet looking at the stars , he was lost in his
own thoughts so was I , I never thought that I will be a stepmother at the age of 18 , which made me
have multiple questions about This unknown woman would she be the primary caregiver to his baby?
she would always be in this little girl’s life and more importantly, she would always be a part of Mvelo
life. As selfish as it sounds, this stranger was suddenly more important than me they created a life with
Mvelo , they had a bond together , Part of me also worried that they might end up in a romantic
relationship together i mean They slept together not once not twice a multiple times until they
conceived a baby and now that they were parenting a child together, what would stop them from
getting sexual again? … if They aren’t already in one . . . oh god what have I gotten my self into

to be continued

chapter 20

Sbahle****

I'm biting on my lip and my thought are bouncing up and down like tennis ball , I’m stuck in my heard
nothing seems to make sense … you know People get stuck in their heads all the time – some of us more
than others. Although it’s lovely to ponder life and inquisitive about the situation at hand, i keep asking
myself what kind of game is he playing ? are they fighting because of me ? why did she keep the baby
from him ? is he in love with her ? Why is this happening now when I feel some kind of a way about him.
Is there an us? Will there be an us in the future ? or we just going remain as two people in the arranged
Union. . . question … question … no answer to them all .

Maybe I should hear him out maybe he will answer my question , ooh God there is this other factor or
issue of him having a child with another women , I thought I was ready for this but I'm I really ? What
am I saying its not up to me or us we are arranged we a porn in the alders game , they need my egg to
grow his bloodline.
Will his child blame me for the rest of her life I'm the cause that her parent are not together, she will
never be with both of her parents under the same roof and while that’s not all that rare, this situation is
particularly strange and heat braking , I know this for fact from experience , I hated my uncle for taking
over my father's house after my father died , so how will Mvelo baby act around me when the truth
comes out that I broke up her parents ... is This history repeating itself ? ,

Ooh God and worse part is that her parents would be on friendly terms and she might struggle with
knowing that she wasn’t particularly conceived out of love or was she ? . How would this child view her
parental situation when she is old enough to understand? Was it one night of stupidity or was it
passionate love making that made her ?

Me : “ who is Sli ?" I knew the answer to that but I wanted to confirm my suspicious ,

I finally asked my voice was barely audible

He lifted his upper body and rested his elbow on the car window and his head on his hand he looked at
me for a long time, his eyes glow this time I felt something in me , I felt a need to be with him my
stomach did back flips and I felt a wave of unknown feeling , his look made me have short breath my
heart beating became abnormal , my mother warned me about this

“ when you feel it you will know “

I then knew that im screwed , I have fallen for Mvelo , his flaws his imperfection did not mean a zilch in
me any more , he lowered his face to mine I breath in her breath I felt the time stopping or was it my
heart.

Him : She is the mother of my child "

Me: girl friend ? "_

Him : No ... " he breath out loud

“ can we not talk about this ... Not today please "

he rubbed his nose on mine , I pushed him off me , a minute ago we were going about our business,
happily in your relationship, when suddenly there's this issue at hand ... it stated to shift everything ,
Maybe it's something he don’t want to say — or the way his avoiding it — but there's a little tickle in
the back of my mind that says something's off. my instinct, maybe its my subconscious is setting off
alarm bells that his being not totally forthcoming. I have never been in situation like this , I’m not sure
if I should override my gut feeling or maybe I’m being paranoid, which is why I’m asking myself what
else is he hiding from me , i felt my throat getting dry I wanted to get away from him, I need his car
keys .... I walked back to the house I set down , I took appletiser and drank from the bottle what does
he mean we must not talk about this not now ...?

the problem is that the majority of my thoughts are not so upbeat they don't have the answers I seek .
When I'm in a mind-wandering mode / “in my head"_, thoughts usually turn to the brain’s default mode
network , which means that the brain literally defaults to this kind of worry-based of thinking too much
, yes I know about my condition I spend years in a therapist room to catch up on fast on the medical
teams , and I'm in that state again when I feel numb

Him : “A wandering mind is an unhappy mind.” he sounded far but yet near I wanted to answer him but
the voices on my head made me close my mouth

Him : Sbahle come back to me " I looked at him he was sitting next to me , his worried ,

Me : I'm sorry " I remembered im looking for keys , i was not planning on talking any further he
remained sited and looked at me.

Him : Sbahle ...talk to me please "

Me :" Mvelo you said you don't feel like talking now so I'm giving you time "

, I got lot of questions but I'm afraid of the answers I will get , yes I knew about his daughter but never
thought the mother is in the picture yet alone they communicate , this feels like a love triangle , what I
am even saying he don't love me he tolerates me because will spend years together because of this
marriage but now what must I do with this feelings I have for him , he snaked his hand around my waist ,
and pulled me to sit in between his legs

Him : I'm right here with you , don't allow your mind to wander off... Reason I don't want to talk about
her is because she Is my past but she is in my life because she is Zee mother, my relationship with her
is complicated okwamanje , as you heard for yourself "_

he pulled me to him and I rested my head on his chest I love how his touch makes me relax

Him : I have a past Sbahle , like any other guy, my mistake made me the man I am today , I'm not perfect
most probably far from being perfect ... "_

Me : are you in love with her ?"_

He breath out loud

Him :Fate hadn’t been kind to me. For so long, being in relationship was an unrequited feeling, an
unreturned text and an unresolved ending. . .Love was a one-sided fight against the overwhelming odds
that I would eventually lose. Love was me trying in vain to hold onto a relationship that was past the
point of saving....

And so after many bitter tears and heartbreaking experience, I wanted a way out. I was content being by
myself. I thought if love wasn’t meant for me, maybe I shouldn’t fight against it. I started to be my own
company instead of yearning to find someone. I slowly learned to be okay with myself instead of
needing someone to be there for me. I was more concerned with guarding my heart and not getting
hurt than anything else...."

Me: you sound broken "

Him : I was ... Until I meet my daughter ,

She turned my world upside down and blew my mind in the most unexpected way. . . "
Him : she is the innocent soul , she did not choose to be born in the world where people fight , hate and
use her for there own personal gain "

He breath out loud

Him: I vow to protect her from all of that , I believe that if she has my heart it will be safe with her
because she had never experience heart break... " I wiped my tears that was so sweet

He turned Me around to look at him

Him : have you ever fall in love ? "

This question again , I looked at him and shook my head No

Him : Zithethelo is to young to safeguard my heart but since you innocent and pure like her my you
safeguard it for me "

I buried my face in his chest , ooh Lord why is he doing this to me

Him : Ndlonkulu "

Me: mmm"

Him : will you do that for me ? “

Me : I'm scared ... "

Him ; im scared to but i trust you , i trust the people who sacrifice their lives for us to meet , my father
went on suicidal mission dumping me and sister on the side of the road to survive. Your father allowed
another lion to do a take over in his pride , challenges you went through prepared you for a guy like me ,
I’m so glad and relieved that my path had been leading up to meeting you and falling in love with you.
The past lessons were painful yet timely to teach me what I need to know so that I can be the best
version of myself before I could love you. I know how right we are for each other because I know what it
was like being with the wrong one. I feel blessed everyday to be with the person that I didn’t dare to
dream I would meet. . . she was chosen for me , but I soon realised she was a missing puzzle in my life "_

I looked at him , and to my surprise his eyes told Me that he meant every word he just said , he ran his
hands on my face

Him :

I'm not an affectionate type those who happened to be in my life they may tell you how much of jerk I
am and you just shaved off my mane"_

I laughed, Am I ready for this ? His my first boyfriend and I don't know shit or rules of engagement , how
will this work his eyes were still looking at me , they glow in the dark , I felt my body heating up and my
stomach turning into knots , he was breathing on my face and he is to close his nose touched mine
Him : “ I’m going to kiss you now ok “ he said just few inches from my mouth and before I could protest
and run for the hill , felt his lips on mine

Me : I don't know how to ..." I said softly , He smiled and gentle suck my bottom lip , it felt good he took
the lead to explore my mouth Sucking , leaking and moaning , I started feeling very funny

My body was on an adrenaline rush my heart rate definitely speeding up ooh God I'm having a heart
attack , I suddenly could not breath my breathing pattern was getting heavier and louder ooh god did I
moan , he pulled out slowly packed my lip and nose , I catch my breath and held my chest

Him : Don’t worry, you’re not dying, it’s just the excitement and nerves your body is feeling when our
lips meet. It’s a good feeling, so don’t panic. Enjoy the adrenaline and all of the weird things going on in
your body, "

I looked at him , and blushed I just kissed boy ... And I like it , he pulled me to his arms

Him : you just had your first kiss ...with your husband ..."

I looked at him and we chuckled

Him ;_

I love you Sbahle Bhengu ...”

To be continued ***

I’m going to be very busy guys this weekend I need to edit and add this book in visionary writing , I also
need to attend to Break Through Tears of man … and write few inset that side … ill be back this side on
Sunday … I hope it long enough.

Love admin Ayanda. K

chapter 21
.

unedited

Sbahle ***

I head the door opening she stood by the door , I heard her heavy breathing

Her : Sbahle ...yakhohlwa that I was once your age "

I faked yawn which turned into be a real yawn ,

Me : morning ma ka Sbahle "

Her : where were you last night ? "

Me : ma ? " I rubbed my eyes

Her : I know you were not here last night ... “

Me: aybo ngingayaphi ebusuku , wadlala ngami ? "

She looked at me for a longest time I made sure my bed covers , covered my body only showed my face

Her : the sun is up , go take a bath and help me with breakfast "

I frowned and looked at her

Me : don't we have maids to do that "

Her : I'm a wife before I'm am queen girly and the kitchen is my place... Awuvuke "

Does this women know how sleepy I am bakithi

Her : and if you going to sneak out of the house my girl try to the evidence so you will not get caught"

I looked at her all puzzled

Her ' nobody sleeps with ugg sleepers , vuja and go take bath and tell me ukuthi uphumaphi "

I dropped my mouth looking at my shoes , fuck I can't even hide evidence that I was not home ,

She walked out laughing while I just hit my forehead, I lifted the bed covers and breath out loud , I ran
my hands in my mouth and smiled , Mvelo and i spend the whole night talking, kissing and just being I
our feeling , I can not believe I fell in love when I was just 18, and I will never forget the moment it
happened, my feeling became stronger in that new development house where it all started as surprise
dinner date to romantic night that i will forever replay in my heart and head, after he told me how he
feels about me , I could not help but to see that his genuine about this, I still have my doubt about him
but last night I let my guard down and followed my heart , we were eating and kissing and tracing the
lines on each other's palms — talking about the future, about college, about all of the unknowns. . . he
has everything plan out which scares me because I have learned that plans can have the most
unexpected shift. What will happened then when you only have plan A and no backup .

he will sometimes stop look at me and squeeze me to a hug , he has said he love me so many times that
I lost count

,him : "Even if one day you regret to be in my life and thinking of leaving me "

he'd told me, arms tangled around my waist,

Him"I hope I get to shake the hand of the man gave you life because his creation is a gem indeed "
As much as I have left s huge part of disappointment in me about us. About him at that moment that
statement was. Just bullshit , this man before me is my husband and I plan to be with him , we passed
out in each others arms and was woken up his heavy breathing he was in deep sleep but the dream he
was in was making him shake and grind his teeth , I shook him softly his eyes lazy open and he smiled
when he saw me and kissed my forehead , it was already morning and there was no time to look st my
dreamy in front of me , I had to go back home ,

Him : I'm going to miss you "

Me : I'll miss you to now let me go before I get into trouble "

We kissed for the longest time , leaving me panting out of breath ..

Him : I love you "

Me : I love you too ...' His teeth are my weakness for a man who never smile or laugh his fa e comes to
life when display his teeth , I tip-toed into my living room , the coast was safe , sneaked inside I knew
mom was going to check up on me it was already after 5h00

so I jumped in the bed and covers my self , so yes FAM I spend night with a man and it was so magical ..

After taking a bath I looked at my self in the mirror , ran my fingers on my mouth and smiled

" I wish I can just stay in your lips , mmm sthandwa sami ungiqabula kamunandi " I giggle and and
walked out its official Mvelo is my new drug

" you know they just told me that its Gold and white " I walked in the kitchen minutes later Mom was
speaking to one of my aunts "Thabi " she the sweetest and very close with mom , Mom is still upset that
Veli ( Mvelo's Aunt) is handling everything on her own , I have no clue how the wedding dress looks like
but Zoe told me that she the best event organizer ever

Me : maka sbahle stop worrying "

Her : sbahle its your wedding I have to ... Your in laws are not involving us one bit "

Aunt T: akathumeli ngishi esisodwa isithombe lesi "_

Mom : and a week from now my Bby will be walking down the isle "

'"_ awu saze savelelwa ulomshado bo !! you wake up you hear about it , you sleep yizo lezo , kanti
kiyaqala yini ukushada leykhaya !!!'

Mom : awu sawubona ma.... Siyaxolisa "__

The bitter queen mother walk in , she hates our guts but she is always in my fathers house eating our
food , she looked at me ,

Her : awusabulisi manje "

Me : sawubona Ndlovukazi "

Her : aish this thing of yos nontombi cant even greet me with respect , nxayi suka ..."

I opened my mouth but looked at my mom , she shook her head ,

, I absolutely hate my grandmother and I want her to either go to a nursing home or die ... Oh God I was
on better mood few minutes back but the moment that women opens her mouth oooh I felt my blood
getting hot , feel like a horrible person for felling like this and I know my father is probably rolling on his
grave right bow but I have to vent before I freak out and say and do something I shouldn't. I hate my
grandmother. There, I said it. She's the most repellent person I've ever known and I feel like I'm wasting
my energy by giving her any attention.

Me : may I please be excused"

Mom nodded , I ran to my room banged the door

Trey ***

Its morning Wait its afternoon and I found my uncle standing by the window , I must had have 2 seconds
of sleep , because I still feel tired I didn't even make it to my bedroom I just passed out on the coach.
Driving from Sbahle house was bed idea but I had to be home to spend some time with Zee

A flash back of dream I had made sit and think of what it meant

it got me worried , I can't shake the feeling that Sbahle life is in danger

Him : you look like you have seen a ghost

Me : “ aish Just a dream I had " I ran my hands on my face "

Him : mmmm

Him : what you doing here ?"_

Him : business ... How was your night with your wife "

I smiled , replaying last night events , I set up straight

Me : Have you ever felt an overwhelming sense of familiarity and joy upon meeting someone? "

He just folded his arms and looked at me

Me: it felt she was someone from my past life i felt connected with her spirit

I finally feel understood fully and completely. I feel like I can be my goofball self around her, and she
won’t judge me. In fact she embrace and accept me unconditionally. I feel totally comforted and
complete looking into her eyes as ifs its me and her are one and the same like i have connected with her
soul to the core. "

Him : OK lover boy I get you ... If I knew you will be this detailed I wouldn't have asked "

We laughed

Him : are those perhaps your wedding vows ??'

I rolled my eyes at him and he chuckled , I walked to my room took shower Sbahle laugher filled the
room and the most strangest thing happens in the shower. The water started a circle movement and
not going down the drain , I knew gogo Ndoni wants to tell me something , I then notice Sbahle standing
on the cliff she looked at me and smiled and she jumped down I ran after her and saw a big wave of
water that look like her face ...

when I came out from the bathroom I set on my bed , the vision was not clear .... It confused me like the
dream i had this morning , I need to See mama today she might share some light , after dressing up I
found my uncle reading some documents ,he had a frown on his face

Me : what's up?"_

Him : “ duty calls I need you help me with this case “

He pointed a file at the table

Me : “ im on leave , planning a wedding and need to spend time with my daughter. So this need to wait
till I get married "
Him : “ its more of your league , embalmment , Froude corruption you know all that jezz and a whole lot
of tax money that not paid “

Me : shit !"_ I could not say no to that. Business law was my speciality ,

I rubbed my hands together all excitement

Me : “ who are putting away … “

Him : “ your father in law “

I dropped my mouth as in what the fuck

Him : “ I knew there was something dodgy about him "_

Me : so you decide to dig up dirt "

Him : it something that Banzi said that got me thinking "

I looked st him

Him : his account is too clean ...which means his hiding something "

Me : “ there is more to this then what you telling me “ I looked at him

Him : “ of cause there is , but that not your business , find loop whole and take him down … “

Me : “ ahh malume I kinda of promised Zee that I … “

Him : “ I trust you with Trey ... I font want that man to be part of of our family , his rain ands now ... '

He stood up took his car keys

Him : his planning something and your wife may be a porn in his game I don’t want to spill any blood
because your conscious . . . you in the big league now act like a lion that you are "__

I nodded ....

.to be continued ...

Chapter 22

***not edited at all ****

Chapter 22****

4 day before the wedding

Trey ***

My wedding day is approaching and I'm ball of nerves. I'm one minute happy and the next I question my
self if I deserve a person like Sbahle , I have been to busy to go by her house and visit her and to be
honest I miss her like crazy , we text and call each other but its just not the same. And now I can only
see her on our wedding day since she is under 24 hrs lock down.
I really love sbahle her her physical appearance do not match her worn soul, she is the mist beautiful girl
I have ever seen , my type as well thick thighs , small tummy and big ass is a bonus , yoo she is so sexy ..
Infect she the full package to me ,but not once I have ever lusted over her, I like the deep connection I
have with her , we talk and she is good listener and dahm smart too her advise are always spot on , she
puts me in my place all the time , she is matured for her age and her worm nature and strong
courageous side makes me see he as a fighter , she no push over, she is just unique ...

Shoot me for saying this again I don't care " I fuckin love that girl" she is that special

Someone who just walked in my life and sweeps me away. The normal I once known is no longer the
same as it used to be , Things started changing and I didn't realize when it actually did, but notice how
perfect the change has been. My family and friends look at me all amazed and are happy about this
change in me . I wonder how can someone so young , so Innocent have such an effect in me Someone
who was not even present, leave aside being called a stranger. Someone who's one sight just filled my
mind with happy thoughts, she is that someone who's presence makes me nervous and happy at the
same time. Even when she is so far away her presence i still can feel , I smiled and sent her a text telling
her I'm thinking about her place my phone aside because I know she not the type who walked around
with a phone on her hands , yep my girl is antisocial Like that

" I'm sorry I'm late , had to drop the kids ... "

He stopped looked at me and clicked his tongue

Him : what the fuck am I apologizing for ? you disturbed me on my week end get away with my family
Mnguni ! "

I laughed , I was in Pretoria on business and Kevin is busy man to score a meeting with , I have been
running after him for days now , and he still tells me shit but I'm glad he could make it

Me : Mr Smith I'm really sorry but i won't have called if it was not important "
Him : hay futsek ...address me by my name I'm not in a suite "

I laughed and called the waiter to take our drinks ,while handed him my proposition.

Kevin Smith is Married to Zoe Aunt and he the shark in the Courtroom , his firm is small but big in profile
, his firm never looses a case and he only deals with high profile cases , so high coat is his second home
basically

Him : this is serious. " he looked at my proposal and whistled and looked at me

Him : what must I do with it "

Me : put him down ... For a long time "

He set back and looked at me ,

Him : why you not doing it . clearly you have everything to take him down "

Me : his my father in law ... "

He took a sip on his drink ,

Well it was not hard in collection evidence to take down Bhengu , the man is just careless and left lot of
bread crumps , so my PI found our more then I was looking for and Taking him down will be like taking
candy from a baby , to be honest the guy never covers his tracks but I feel sorry for the guys that are
connected to him because they going down with him also

Him : this are high profile people "

Me : its more of kind of a thing ..."

I have compiled evidence that will take him down for long time, I was planning on looking him in the
eye when I do it but it will be conflict of personal interest so another firm must do the Horner's

Him : what in for you "

Being in the legal field have made understand that favours are done for more of a personal gain. My
uncle was right when he said I need act like a lion so I'm planing a hostile take over of Kevin firm not
now though but in few years time. I like how he works and the Durban branch is missing that ...so I need
him as partner .

Me : Kevin come on we practicality family why would you think of that "

My poker face did not give him any ideas but I know that he will will do an investigation on me , but
bummer for him I'll be in the UK...he relaxed a bit and started talking business ... And he finally agreed.
..

Me : nice doing business with you "

Him : like wise " he took the file and his phone after shaking my hand , he stopped and looked at me

Him : I'm going to keep a close eye on you Mnguni "

Me : I expect you to do just that" he shook his head and walked out ,

" one down ... "

I sent a text to my uncle

Him :good ... You know what to do next right "

Me: I'm on it "_

I got in my car after I left the restaurant my phone ringed and connected to the Bluetooth

" Trevor you ... You took my child to Ngonyameni Village ... With out telling me !!!"

Me : I don't repot to you about my baby "

Her : you know that I'm back in town and you decide to ship my child across the country !!!"

Me : well we don't revolve around your busy schedule sli , do your speech or what ever stand up shiy
you do and stop blowing up my phone as if I ow you something " she stated crying shit not this again I
just dropped the phone

Sbahle ****

This days I woke up with distorted thought I have a bad feeling, but that mostly happens when my step
father is around , its easy for Mvelo to say I'm must forgive him for treating my mom the way he do. But
I just can't find peace in it... I'm split into million peaces thinking about how will i leave happy with
Mvelo while leaving my mom alone with this monster... This days he has been having numerous one on
one meeting with the evil Queen mother and spends most of his night in her house I should be relived
that I do not get to see him but this hag of women is always on my case that I'm this close in strangling
her.
She asks questions all day long, usually the same types of questions where people my in-laws work,
where those the Mnguni get so much money ? even though there's is google and all that jazz she still
will say that his thug in suite ,

I feel like I'd have more peace around a 4 year old than her , She so quick to talk about disrespect and
that she will "smack me" When I leave her hanging , calling me names is something i have came to
arcustom to ,She does nothing but sleep , shout and swear at me and my mother all day, but when I
sleep during the day after getting away from a day of humiliation she'll complain about how I'm lazy and
that the Mnguni must replace me with beautiful , hard working smart girl referring to her daughter I
presume.

Lately She's nosy as fuck. You literally can't go from room to room without her asking you what you're
doing. If I eat something, she'll sit there and watch me and make comments about it. I have decided
not to eat around her unless someone else is there too because I know she'll stare. If I go upstairs for
any reason, she'll stand at the bottom of the stairs and call me down to ask me what I'm doing. . . she
called me wicket and that I have bad heart because I hardly talk to her or anyone else ,

" ukhohlakele njenGO nyoko wena ... Nxa "

honestly if this was any other house hold I would have long killed her. Or ran away but I stay for the
sake of my mom , but I'm glad this married came it my only escape ,

" you can not start your new life with such heart Sbahla learn to forgive and forget " ooh my poor
mother she is so naive bakithi , forgive

kanjani if this women is provoking me Evey time she gets

" we counting down the days .. Kuba mnyama kakhulu uma sekuzokhanya . . . bekezela mntanami ...and
Pray " my mom will comfort me when i struggle to get of the bed to face the world

I don’t believe that my happiness lies in someone’s hand but I need to go out there and make my own
happiness , You've probably heard quotes like "happiness is a choice" or "if you want to be happy, be" or
"people are as happy as they make up their minds to be.” In theory, these quotes come from a good
place. They're meant to highlight the notion that, though you don't always have control of your
circumstances, you have control over how you feel. But how do I exactly feel ? I hate being Bhengu ...
Its just a name that I will never hold with horner ...behind close doors I'm constantly abused and I must
endure it all , because I'm princess I need to smile and wave like I'm leaving the perfect life . .

I turned around and looked at the time it was 40 min after 4 in the morning , seemed like I never slept
at all to be frank with yall I didn’t sleep at all , I took quick shower jumped into my black long red skirt
matching red crop top that has a hoody , white cap and red kicks , took my diary and backpack , my
intention was to sneak out for morning ride on my bike but I suddenly felt my heart beating abnormally
fast as i head foot steps coming my way I ran to the pantry and closed the door

. I feel like I'm developing anxiety from being around her. If I hear her coming, I get nauseous. I'm afraid
to walk back to my room because I know she'll start interrogating my every step

Her : this people do not need to marry this girl ...she not worthy to be Queen "

Male voice : but Nwabisa useceliwe nje "

Her : I'll deal with that mina ngithi .. . washada loyanondidwa imfene izihamba emini and wena you will
lose a lot "

Male voice : that marriage will not last , Nwabisa will be a Mnguni wife ill make sure of that "

Her : i don't want it to happened Uyezwa !!, you better make sure of that , ungakhohlwa that I sacrifice
a lot for you to get the throne time to pay back Bhengu "

I held my mouth in shock " ooh my God

you know what to do ....

chapter 23
.

**** not edited at all ****

Sli ****

I was mad angry in fact I hated ever crossing paths with Trey , his such bully and uses power over me ,
so what was I now to him? another women who carried and mothered his child , how did we get to this
point how did it all fall down ,

" ooh my God you still here ... Didn't they tell you that the kids are gone " she said stepping out of her
house , I was so emotional when the house keeper told me that the kids left with Mzamo this morning
they were going to the village, since Trey is getting married on few days time , so I'm not allowed to see
my child because his getting married.

I wiped my teas , and looked at her she still look beautiful ,but very sickly she was skinny with dark
circles around her eyes and her bones were clearly visible on her face .

I stood up from her stoop, and dusted my self

Me : I'm sorry "

She coughed, slowly walked to a rocking stool , she was in bad shape I must admit , I felt sorry for her
shame .

Her : staring will not give you the answers of my illness Ms Zwane '

I looked down " I'm sorry "

Her : what do you want from my brother ?" I was about to leave her premises , Pam hates me that's no
lie, too her I'm just a sugar mama that's ruining her little brothers life ,

I stopped walking this is the one question she ask me that I'm unable to answer ,
Me : excuse me ?"

Her : as you can see I'm really sick and repeating my self will just make me more weak "

Even on her state Pam still acts like a bitch ,

Me : we have a child together ..."

Her : I don't give a rat shit about that and don't get me wrong I love my niece I'm not asking about her
I'm asking you ukuthi umfunani umfowethu "

Me: nothing ... We not together anymore " that was bitter sweet , I'm I really over with trey? or I'm just
trying to convince her, ? Our relationship is kept a secret any wat ,

She laughed , OK now I see why every one says that Zithelo looks like Pam , she laughed like her , her
two dimples just came out to play , the way she raise her shoulder when she laughed it what Zee does as
well

Her: you were given one instruction pertaining my niece just one " Zithelo is with Pam , call Pam if you
need to see her or talk to her ...im out of town on business " that was the SMS he sent to you , wena
what did you do ... Call him everyday , every night. .. Haybo mama what were you doing ? "

Me : Pam how can I talk to you when you clearly have showed me and told me you do not like me "

Her : and you right about that I do not like you, but I'm mother and when a child is involved I put my
differences aside with the other parent "

Me : I'm sorry I didn't know "

She looked st me
Her : for an older women you shure act dump how old are you 31-32 years old and already you do not
think , you to quick to act like a victim thinking that Trey Family does not like you , you forget that you
the mother of his child...that alone had made you family , But you too emotionally invested in Trey and
you forgot what made you step foot in our home ...wawuzobika umtana ... "

Me : I think I should leave "

She was talking out of content now and I was not about to get in a fight with a sick person "_

Her : yini iqiniso liyababa ?

Me : what have i ever done to you Pam to treat me this way ..."_

Her : let's see 5 years ago you called my brother a witch for telling you Truth about you dead husband
,you didn't stop there you told him his cursed for having a calling and you called him all sort of name
even blamed him for killing your precious husband and destroying your life ,what you did after that you
turn around and opened your old legs for him without using protection , you trap him with a baby ,
instead of telling him the minute you found out you pregnant you hid it from him and came back with a
baby when she was Three years old, when he told you he had moved on you using his baby to get beck
in bed with him ...so you old enough to ask me why I don't like you ?"

I could not say a word to her my tears just continued yo rush down on my cheeks

Her : I will never hate you but I hate the way you act around my brother, Sli you are broken and you can
never be in a right relationship because you used to being hurt by Man to you this is just normal , "

Me : You don't know me "

Her : I don't need to know you yo see right trough you ... surprisingly, girls who grew up with dads who
were emotionally or physically absent are more likely to struggle with depression as adults. Because
they fear abandonment and rejection, these women often isolate themselves emotionally. They avoid
healthy romantic relationships because they don't feel deserving and fear getting hurt, but they might
jump into unhealthy relationships that ultimately lead to heartbreak. In either scenario, the women are
in emotional peril and frequently become depressed. If they don't deal with the cause of their sadness—
an absent dad—they may never be able to develop healthy relationships with men. . . have you ever
thought about forgiving your own father for leaving you and starting a family with another women ? ...
No but you just jump from one unhealthy relationship to another ...

..Again I'm going yo ask you umfunani umfowethu ?"

Me : you don't know about my life ..."

I'm shocked that she knows about my dark secrete that I kept buried for years now

Her : you forget that i was once a cop and digging information about people I was trained to do that ... "

I looked down I felt my heart beating abnormally , this was embarrassing ,

Her : I follow your motivational talk and I believe that behind that insecure women there is strong
women , you just need to Stop helping the world and focus on you first stop preaching what you don't
practice "

I felt my knees not strong enough to hold my body , I found my self seating down

Her : I will never hate the women who made me a Aunt for the first time , i love niece i see me in her
eyes ,

"

I wiped my tears and looked at her ,

Her : if you love him as much as you claim you do, you will walk away ...

Me : Pam I..."
She cut me off before I could talk

Her : you only have seen the good side of him , trust me my brother is the worst kind of human being
when he wants too be and he feeds on the weak ...don't be his victim" she stood up and slowly walked
inside the house she left me still confused.

driving back to my house my mind was replaying every word that Pam said , do I really have daddy
issues ?

"_good you came right in time "

Me : hi "

I passed her trying to make my way to my room

Her : sly I'm moving out "

I froze and looked at her

Me : what ?"

Her : ever since we came back to South Africa we have been fighting if its not about Trey its about Zee if
not Zee its about work ,

Me : Nola please I haven't been in right state of mind , right now Trevor took my baby to his village ...

Her : you see what I mean "

Me : I'm hurt Nola OK shoot me for crying out loud . . . "_

She sigh

Her : I know Pam told me that the kids are going , I called you but you never answered you phone "

Me : I'm sorry ...I'm just stressed this whole thing with Trevor is weighing on me , "

She breath out loud

Her : what think ? ... The fact that he wants to spend time with his child or the fact that he is getting
married ?"

She folded her hands and looked at me ,

Her : seat down ..." She pulled me to sit with her she held my hand and looked at me

Her : You cannot co-parent with a narcissist. I repeat, YOU. CANNOT. CO-PARENT. WITH. A. NARCISSIST.

No matter how flexible or firm you are. No matter how hard you try, every attempt to “be the bigger
person” or “kill ‘em with kindness” will ultimately fail. You cannot co-parent with a toxic person. "

Me : Nola Trey is not like that ..."

She laughed shook her hand

Her : Silindile listen babe Co-parenting requires shared effort and shared intent. Consider the prefix “co”
– it means, “together, mutual, in common.” Narcissists do not share the same goals as you. He cannot
and do not put the child’s best interest before their own maybe he does I don't know but Trying to co-
parent with Trey is like trying to row a boat with one oar, while the other person uses theirs to slowly
add water. Your boat cannot go straight when you’re only paddling on one side you can Try as best as
you can bust still your boat will go in circles, stopping only when it sinks."
Me : I know ... I know but maybe if I can talk to him he will see that we need to coparent the right way "

Her : how you going to do that when in your mind you still believe that you two are still together "

I stood up this talk I was not ready for not now not ever , first it was Pam not even an hour ago now Nola

Me: Nola not this again please "_

Her : when if not now , I'm tired of walking on egg with you ,To be clear, break-ups are hard on everyone
just accept it and move on and for the sake of Zithelo just do it !!!"

I cry a lot this days and I just have no control over my emotions and I wish people will stop gunning on
me , I'm the victims here I was the one who got dumped when I had a lot of expectations of happy
ending

Her: babe all along you have painted this beautiful side of Trey that I also was fooled to believe , but just
by looking at how he treats you I can tell he was never a good guy you were intended to be with in the
first place , his more of asshole , and ...."

Me : please Nola stop calling him names ..."

I looked at her and she said something in Arabic , ooh god this friend of mine

Her:. When I say “narcissist,” I’m not speaking in hyperbole, so it’s important that you pause for a
moment, and really consider a few things, Is your ex controlling? Emotionally abusive? Insensibly
difficult? Does s/he minimize, deny or shift the blame? Does s/he try to intimidate or isolate you or the
children? And do they exhibit any signs of parental alienation? If the answer is no, great news! Your ex
probably isn’t a narcissist and you probably can find a path to peaceful co-parenting. But if you
answered yes to a few of those indicators, it’s likely time to give up the ship.. . allow him to do this on
his own and you need to communicate with Pam or Veli for visitation right ..." She took her bag and walk
out ... I sank down on the floor trying so hard not to brake down but failed miserably.
.

you know what to do

Chapter 24

Trey

" OK baby how do we do this ?"

She giggled I just finished giving her Bath, she was dressed up but her hair was something I have never
Seen before it big red afro

Her ; pull it up daddy like this "

It did not even fit in her small hands as she showed me

Me: ooh my princess like this " she giggled and that alone melted my heart , I love my baby so much and
I enjoy this moment I have to share with her , bed time story , bath times , doing her hair , and
watching cartoon's with her ,

Raising a child is no easy task, and it can be more daunting when you’re raising a daughter as a single
dad, Without the emotional assistance of another partner, it can be challenging navigating the complex
emotions as well , I fear about social situations, and changes my child has to go through , I wish I can
meet common ground with Sli but the way she acting I just can't deal , I still hate that I was not there
when Zee was still in her mothers tummy and the three years in her life I have missed a lot and my main
focus now is to be there for her now , yes I can to rewrite the past but I can make it up in the present
day , I honestly thought me and Sli had a short in this love thing ,

I tried to look pass everything that happened and what my family thinks of her , try to rekindle the flame
but it was just not the same we grew apart , 'I' in fact did , our relationship Just went pear-shaped and
my assumptions, plans and dreams of being a family man blow up in my face, I care about her no doubt
but ... I don't know the spark is just not there anymore,
Sadly as this may be but common occurrence to most man, ironically I was never prepared to cope
with this drift.

Me: well we all done "

She looked at her self in the mirror

Me: you like it"

Her : you the best daddy thank "

I punched the air and she giggled tunning around to Hug me

Me : I told you that daddy can make a killer ponytail. And I can paint your nails like a champ "

She nodded , call me crazy or what not but when ever I'm free I take my baby girl on a date its like
Dating her. I wish I could say I do this consistently, but even once every few months is better than not at
all. Dating your daughter is critical to showing her how a man should treat a woman once she reach that
stage Call me old school, but on my dates with my girl, I open the doors, pay the bills, look them in the
eye and tell her Her heart is more beautiful than her appearance , make her feel like a million bucks.
This doesn't have to cost a ton of money. A walk around the block. A short bike ride. A trip to the ice
cream store. Doesn't have to be fancy, but again, it must be intentional. . . and yesterday we had a tea
part with her dolls and she painted my nails , OK I got Somizi nails right now but if it's make my baby
happy I'm happy

" good morning king and her princess "

Zee : koko !" She jumped and ran to her they hugged and talked briefly she than kissed my cheek and
dash out its breakfast time with her cousin

Koko : how you doing son "

Me : she a handful"

Her : wait till shes a teenager and tell Me if you will not miss this days when she is still so young "

I laughed

Her : you good with her ... This parenting thing comes natural to you "

Me: I just lean as I go along ,I hope I had a manual "

She laughed

Me : she asked about her mom yesterday "

Koko set down in one of the coach in my room

Me : I don't think there will ever be an us ... And I don't know how to tell Zee "

Her : no matter what's life has in store for you and Silindile , either you love her , leave her , take a
second wife or decide to coparent with her , Zithelo must not be affected by your relationship dispute ,
she needs a worm home and love ... She wants to be loved More then she wants the stuff you can buy
her or the things you can teach her, she wants you to love her. No one else on Earth can assume your
role as parent or daddy. Your daughter will let you down , make huge mistakes, and maybe even turn
her back to you for a season, but don't ever let her doubt your love for her. Look her in the eye and tell
her you love her a Lots , she needs to know the know the cause of you and her mother not being
together "_

I nodded , I continued to pic up Zee toys on my room , koko set there silently

Her ; have you spoken to your sister ?"

Me:I did few days back ....she coming today right ?"

She looked at me and looked down ,

Her : just call her please ... I'll go check up on the kids"

Me ; koko ...she going to be OK right ?"

She just nodded with glassy eyes and walked out , I looked for my phone and dialed her number

Me : are you OK ? "

She laughed

Her : I'm pregnant Trey ... And have cancer so ya im good "

Me ; don't play Like that Pam '

Her : stop worrying the minute I give birth I'll start chemotherapy ... Enough about me how are the
wedding preparations going ooh I can't wait to meet Sbahle , Zoe and veli are bragging about the Queen
"

Me : she is very special and strange enough for arrange marriage I fell in love with her and she loves me
too "

Her : you better thank me little brother , I told you to spend time with her and see if you will like her or
not but boom you fell in love ... Aish I'm so happy for you "
Me : she just perfect Pam , strict and straight forward , hotheaded and she has temper for days , its like
I'm marring you " she giggled and started coughing , she was out if breath

Me,: PaM ... Sisi ... Pam !!"

Her : I'm fine ... I'm fine , " she breath out loud and I found my self weak and holding my face , I have
exhausted all my resources to get Pam the beast treatment and Dr but they all say that nothing can be
done while she is still pregnant , Pam loves her unborn baby so much that I fear that it is slowly killing
her,Sbu is walking Zombi and drowns himself in alcohol to avoid seeing his wife in that stage, I devoted
my self to prayer only God can help us now , my mind was not interested in what she was telling me ,
about the visit she had from Sli yesterday , but she caught my attention when she asked

Her : are you stringing her along Trey ?"

Me : what !!! ... No !"

Her : I know you Trey and women like Sli turn you on ..."

Me : Pam you out of line"

Her : don't fuck with me I know for a fact that you have an impact on how she is acting now , I wish I can
smack her so hard seriously I don't get why most high-powered woman prefer dating someone toxic,
you know most successful women actually have lower standards when it comes to relationships. . . "

Her : I'm toxic ? "

Her : you my brother I know you and I'm glad you meet a women like Sbahle ,she will sort you out "

I laughed , honesty speaking Sbahle scares the shit out out of me she has that look that strips my Igor

Her : I'm just glad you have girl child , and your habits and way should change little brother , I may not
like sli for various reason but I don't condone what you doing to her , think of Zee you have an influence
on her future partner. Scary thought I know but the kind of man you are to her mother will have a direct
impact on who she chooses to marry some day. zee must beg you to marry her when she grew up. And
when you explain to her that you already married to her amazing step mother she must wish to have
that too, I know you might fear of being the right man for Sbahle but trust me If you're doing it right you
will still be with sbahle , when Zee is all grown up "

Those words hit home for Me and as much as we talk for another 15 min or so I was still wrapping my
head on that , we finally said our goodbye and I set in my bed just thinking and processing everything , I
later jumped in the shower I ran to my room to attend to my buzzing phone

Me : hello"

Sniffs

I looked at my screen it was " my Queen "

Me : Sbahle ... What's wrong ?"

she didn't say anything but just cried

me : I'm coming ... got to new house at the development site ... I love you OK ... "

she sniffed again ...shit!

to be continued ....

chapter 25

not edited at all ***

Sbahle
Not every day you get to hear a person conspiring to kill you or better yet wants you dead , what I heard
proved my theory that my Uncle killed my father , but I wouldn't have put it pass him one bit the signs
were there just no proof or evidence .

my family's always been quite abusive, both emotionally and (rarely) physically towards me Since my
early childhood, all I've been hearing at home was screaming, crying and blaming shifted to everyone.
No wonder I have grown to have this stone heart.

On the other hand I knew my grandmother was evil but for her to have a hand in my father death that
just shows that I don't know the people I call family ... I was pacing up and down in my room I felt Like
screaming , I kept asking my self why do this people hate me so much , first they killed my father , drove
my sibling out of this house , treat my mother like trash and now they ganging against me ...what have I
done to deserve this life I sank down and cried , I cried for my fathers life that was taken , I cried for my
mother who's constantly abused , my brothers whom I don't know if there dead or alive , I cry for myself
the fate of my life that I don't know which turn it will take

" hello "

I didn't even notice that I dialed his number

"_sbahle what's wrong "

Just to hear his voice I felt like crying even more

Him: I'm coming ..."

He told Me to go to the house we shared our first kiss in , after dropping the call I wiped my eyes and
stoop up ...

Him : the usual spot Nkosazana? " I nodded and smiled it was one of the guards that always help me
sneak out , I took my mountain bike , and I rode out of the royal realms , normally when I ride up hill i
smiled and embrace the beauty of my village but today my heart is heavy tears are blinding me , I'm
walling out loud I'm just a ball of angry right now
Mornings are quiet that I heard my cries echoed on my ears , I jumped off my bike I wiped my tears I
stood by the cliff and looked at the clean lake its looks so Peaceful , majestical and steady , I wish my
heat can be like that as well .

The songbirds give a daily concert, I looked up and admired One of the most beautiful creations in the
world ' the sun' Its bright rays are seen by every single one of us, I closed my eyes as it slowly worm my
face . . . I'm tired of the toxic life I'm leaving I wish my head could stop talking and be quite the voices
are too loud now , I just wish to find peace .

I took a deep breath , I saw something like a light glittering in the lake I felt like it was calling me , my
eyes was glued on it I found myself taking off ,my shoes and cloths i was left with only my underwear I
moved to the edge and dive in the lake , the water felt so good on my body , my attention shifted to cool
water on my skin , I decided to dive in The water is clear and refreshing I'm quite a good swimmer and
I'm able to hold my breath for few minutes under water , I was hypnotised by the strange light , the
most beautiful stone it was shining on the floor of the lake, it was so beautiful that I just kept diving
down , every time when I get close its looks to be far from me to pic it up , it looked like small
thousands ristal sparkling in blue and silver colours, the more I dive down the more it came to life I froze
when I released what it is. I had to breath I was too dip under water my lungs were about yo explode ,
ooh my its beautiful its moved its so big it danced and looked at me , I panicked " ooh my God " It
moved close to me , I found my self loosing air I stated coughing and trying to swim up but my eyes
were fixed on this big snake before me , it change its face and it upper body looked like human

" you not ready ... " my eyes felt heavy and light were out

Trey ***

After speaking to Sbahle I dash into my closet , I jumped into navy chino pants , white shirt and powder
blue sweater , I put on my white Jordan took my car keys looked for my wallet while calling our pilot

" I need the bird in the air in 30 min time "

Him : destination sir? "

Me : KZN "

Him : I'm worming it up for you "

, I was about to step outside my room when saw someone springing something on top of Sbahle drink
and food she took it and drank it , the face was hidden from me but I noticed the bracelet on the hand
, I saw small crawling ants look alike thing on Sbahle body she started screaming she had blisters and
boils all over her face disturbing to look at

Me : No !" I rushed out of my room and humped into Koko outside my room

Her : come ..." I followed her

Me : I saw something "

Her : I sensed it ... Your wife is in danger "

Me : she called me crying ...

Her : ooh Nkosi yami ...that family don't want this

marriage to happened"

Me : what .... Why ? "

Koko : she was suppose to marry a useless being that will drive her to suicide her future was not
suppose to turn our like this..."
Me : ngenzeni ... "

Koko : angazi mtanami ...khuluma ne thonga lakho"_

We finally arrived at our back yard she opened the ancestral room , she took an enamel basin filled it
with water ...

Her : khuluma nethonga " the minute she said that I felt this pounding headache, i held my head and
kneel down , koko took one of amabhayi placed it over my shoulder

and lit impempho

, I saw Gogo ndoni in the water

Her : she does not believe in our ways she is not ready to go to the water she may not rise "

Me : ubani Lona omfisela okubi "

Gogo : his grandmother from her father side was known for using dark magic before she died , she was
evil and very bad hearted , they buried her face down so that she will never rise again , but when some
one feels a hint of jealously or envies her spirit act on those feeling , someone in that house does not
want I Ndovukazi to marry you "

Me : ubani gogo "

Her : akubalulekile .... , she just became one with the water she not ready to know her true power ,
ngozozama ukumukhipha emanzini .... Shesha mvelo call her name in the water , she will have a fighting
will to come back if ezwa your voice "

I saw sbahle floating underwater with Ndon she was not moving , I started doing as instructed , my
heart was beating so fast I was terrified
" Sbahle phuma emanzini ... vika Sbahle " I ran my hands on the water , " baby please ..."_

Sbahle ****

I don't know how but I heard Mvelo voice I slowly opened my eyes the big yellow snake moving back to
the water

I was on the bedrock trying to catch my breath , I almost drowned ... No hold up I did drawn did this
snake help me ?crazy part is I did not even feel my self losing my breath i busked in the solar energy as
the sunlight dries my body ,

Me : " what just happens "_

ooh God Mvelo,! My memory came back He said I must meet him at the house , its a bit far so I decided
to request , I was do tired when I arrived , I was still shocked that the house has Furniture now ,I just
drag my tired , hungry self to the main bedroom and slept

Narrated

Aunti Thabi found food on the table that looked mouth watering ,

" take that Food to that lazy girl , she has not left her room today "
Aunti Thabi " yebo Ndlovukazi ..." She stopped and looked at her

" ma ukhona umaka' Sbahle "

Queen : kokuqala angisiye unyoko ... And how must I know about that women's where about I'm not her
keeper "

Her : uxolo ma...Ndovukazi "

Queen : kuyaphola ukudla ... Hambisa bo!!"

Aunt Thabi wandered why is queen doing in this house alone yet alone preparing food for Sbahle ,
something was strange with this picture why was the Queen mother giving a dahm that Sbahle eats or
not , and most of this things on this plate was not even Sbahle favorite food , she knocked in her room
and she let her self in , she smiled when she notice that she sneaked out again , she was not about to let
this lunch go to waist so she decided to sit down an eat , she took the empty plate down stairs the
Queen jumped from her seat

Queen : udlile "

Aunt T: yebo ma ... But she is not feeling well so she is taking a nap "

Aunt Thabi noticed a smile on the Queen face that was strange the women never smile at all ,

Queen : kuhle let me go ... Got things to do in my house "

.
Sbahle ***

I woke up with a bad dream , something was wrong I saw Aunty Thabi telling me to be careful , she
looked different not her usual self she had this glow that was following her , I looked around and I found
my self under Mvelo hold , when did he get here

Him : hi "

Me : hi"

He pulled me into a hug , this was bone crushing hug

Me : I can't breath "he chuckled

Him : I'm sorry I could not come on time ... I got held up"_

Me : it ok , it was bit crazy for me allow you to fly across the country anyway "_

Him : I'm your man when you call I should leave everything and come to you "

I rested my head on his chest I think I have found my new peaceful place its in his arms , silent was loud
that we would hear a pin drop , I was debated telling him about today's event , and I don't know why
his so quiet today it's not like him at all .

Him : spit it out "

I looked at him

Him : what eating you up , '

Me : I'm good Mnguni "

Him ; Mabhengu I'm not going to ask you twice "

His voice made me shake, my heart beat moved from my left side straight to my throat ,

Ohh I just found out that my grandmother and uncle are conspiring on killing me and making Nwabisa
your new wife , I got so angry that I ended up jumping into the lake and saw a big snake that looked like
a human , and I heard your voice calling me to come out when I was about to drown ...

Him : who's is this Nwabisa " I jumped and sat up straight

Me : Wait did I say everything out loud "

He side smile , he is mad about what my family is planning , how can I be do stupid and say everything
out loud

Him : I know you will question what I'm going to say , but can you do me favour when I'm gone "

I looked at him as he stood up OK is this guy twins with Kanye West fuck he dresses to kill , the guy is a
fashion guru his body structure makes him looks hot in what ever his got on , he has that bracket legs
and when he walks damn people stop and look at him , he turned and looked at me

Him : don't pull your wall down for no one , I see a storm approaching and I'm not going to be around to
protect you but I trust that you will be just fine , just be a bit vigilant with who you open up too , "

I frowned and looked at him , he was serious ,

Me : I don't understand "

Him : you know your family more then I do ... Follow that gut inside of you it never lies "
I nodded

Him : so tell me why diving ? "

Did he just drop a boom on me and changed the subject just like that

Me : “ it was suppose to be a swim , water helps me think "

Him : “ what time was that ? “

Hallo is this an interrogation

Me : this morning after I called you "

Him : and you saw a snake ...big snake in the water "_

I looked at him and his eyes were fixed on mine

Me : “ I'm not sure... why you asking me so many question “

Him : I'm curious "

He side smile now I know his pissed because I'm not being direct with him , I nodded

Him : “ im talking alone now “ he hates it when I don't use my mouth to respond , I swear to god I'm in
love with a controlling Frick
Me : “ I don’t know what you expect me to say .... Yes i saw a snake in the lake and i heard your voice
when i was drowning and crazy as it is the snake saved my life ... “ I said with a pinch of being annoyed
he just looked at me

Me : I knew you going to think I'm crazy "

He crouched in front of Me and held my hands

Him : you truly are a chosen one .. You just meet my great great great grandmother Ndoni Mnguni .."
He kissed my forehead " come let me feed you"my mouth was just on the floor right now , what did he
say ?

To be continued **** to sleepy to edit ...I'm sorry ***"

chapter 26

unedited

Sbahle ***

" you sure you don't want me to walk you in ?"

I looked at the time it was already after 18:00 my phone has been buzzing non stop , that man is going
to kill me , a million thoughts was running in my head about what I'm going to say to him

Him : “ should I be worried about your actions “

I shook my head

Him : do you ever say what you feel or you prefer talking to your self and believing that everyone is
gunning over you ? ..."'

I breath out loud , Mvelo always wants me to explain my self to him all the time , right now I need to
think how am I going to face the very same people who I know they killed my father and conspiring God
knows what against my life ,

Me : “ im not much of talker Mvelo you should know this about me by now “

Him : “ I bag to differ you are chatterbox in that small head of yours , You know I have calling right ? and
sometimes deep in the night i

I can hear you calling my name, but How can I try to help you woman If you go on hiding your pain …
Baby, the tears on your pillow are real You can't go on pretending to me , when I can actually see the
pain right trough you, talk to me please my Queen “

I smiled but slowly wiped the smile on my face the minute I saw cars going into my yard ,

" I have to go "

I looked at Mvelo with his Jordan on the dashboard , looking I'll kind of being chilled , is he even aware
that I have crazy man in that house who going to make my life a leaving hell from now on because i
disobeyed him and left the house without his approval and to make it worse I’m coming back at this
time .

" ooh God "_

I saw the kings guards coming my way I wanted to hide or run away … he greeted me and Mvelo

Mvelo : “ is everything OK ?"_

Him : “ yes sir ... Nkosazane uyadingeka endlini "_

I looked at mvelo , he held my hand

Him : I got you ... Come let's go ..."

He got out from his side and walked to my side to open the door for me , I looked at him my feet could
not move ,

Him : Sbahle ? "

Me : I have bad feeling about this Mvelo “

He crouched in front of me and held my hand

Him : I know I have it too , but babe Ignorance is the mother of all poisons , stop feeding your head and
believing that things are fixed and permanent... This life is not permanent ... "_

I smiled and looked down

Him : rember i told you about my Aunt Nomakhezi and how much she hated me and envied me for my
gift something I'm born with something that is in my blood its no different than what you about to walk
into in that house , people are bound to hate you if they can not have what you have ,
Envy is a two-person relationship: I want what you have. Jealousy is a three-person triangle: I want
therecognition you have from others. . . they all want And what to take but it never meant for them "
isipho sakho is to be Queen to rule to be the mother of valley its your birth right they may try to snatch
it from you but they will never succeeded … because sonke sizelwe sifumbethe different gifts "_

He held my cheek

Him : your smile will be there down fall kill them with kindness babe"

I nodded “ thank you "

Him : just remember that Envy is the religion of the mediocre. It comforts the condemned, it soothes
their worries, and finally, it rots their souls, allowing them to justify their meanness and their greed until
it eats them inside out , whatever causes there suffering has its roots in the Three Poisons: Ignorance,
Hate, and Greed... Don't stood to there level "

He pulled me to a hug , I have leaned to allow him to hug me funny how I have never pushed him , and
how I feel comfortable and safe into his arms ,

" you sure you don’t want me to come with you ... You know that angibasabi "

I shook my head and chuckled in his shoulder

Me : I don't want them thinking I'm disrespecting them , our wedding is in few days times and to be
seen with you will be like sprinkling oil into fire ...but thank you for today , I guess I needed to armour
up with what waits ahead "

Him : go get them tiger " he kissed my forehead

I giggled as I walked home , I turned and find him still looking at me , I waved at him as i ran inside the
Royal yard

I got inside the house and found Didy walking up and down like a headless chicken outside , she turned
and looked at me I wanted to scream oh how I missed her

Didy : where were you? Do you even know what time is it now ?”

Ok not a response I was looking for

Me : not now Didy , when did you get here ? "

Her : that not important ohh babe this people want your head , I feel like you need run away or
something better yet call yurt man to get you “ she was talking to fast and panic in her voice was
evidence

Me : what going on ?"

She shook her head she was shaking , I have never seen her like this , she kept on pulling me way from
the door if it was for her I would not enter the house she was blocking me

Me : I'm not running away Dudu yini kwenzakalani ?"

She wanted to hug me but I sneezed and pushed her away , I don't get this hugging shit its either she say
what she has to say and stop with this physical I affection bullshit , besides this arms only belong to my
mother and Mvelo ...

Me ; why so many cars ? What happening ?" I was getting impatient with her now

Her : ooh God you don't know!!.." she held her mouth , I heard a person crying hysterically inside the
house
" ooh God she was too young to young to die , what happens to her ? ... Ooh kodwa ngo mzukulu Wami
"

Didy : stop Sbahle " I pushed her aside and rushed to the sitting room , every Bhengu family member
was here , they looked sad as if someone died , the Queen mother just walked in and was being all
dramatic with loud cries and no tears , Nwabisa eyes popped out when she saw me , she pulled her
mother trying to make her stop but she was on another level causing drama and drawing attention

Didy pulled me seat down next to her , she held my hand so tight

" umzukulu ?" My Uncle asked , his eyes moved to me and I swear to god I saw steam coming out of his
ears

Queen : ooh yes they told me to rush here because sekunomshophi owenzekile , awu dudu maka Sbahle
... "

Me : what's going on?? "

Queen mother looked at Me as if she has seen a Ghost ok I’m getting tired of this look

Uncle : ophumaphi Sbahle , kunini sifunana nawe , just because the Mnguni pay lobola for you you think
you adult now busy doing what you want Kwami ! " ooh shut it you pig this is my fathers house nxa ! ,
futhi I’m not there why is this women crying ?

He clicked his tongue I guess my facial expression gave me way , I looked down this was what I was a
afraid off this men humiliating me in front of the whole family , Mvelo keeps telling me to kill them with
kindness , njani if he constantly trying me , yooo his testing my patient now

Him : I asked you uphumaphi "

I couldn't look him in the eye even if I wanted to ,

Queen mother : so ubani kanti o’file ?? "

I shoot my eyes open and looked at her. I could feel my uncles eyes on me and did not give a rat ass , I
made sure I don't even look his direction

" Thabi is no more Ma, we found her in the kitchen floor , "

Ooh my Gog no it can not be. No... No ,!!

Nwabisa : what happened to her "

Another aunt answer : it looked like food poisoning , because she , she had white form coming out of
her mouth and blood coming out of her ear her lips were blue “

Nwabisa : ooh my God !" I felt numb ,

Queen : ubekuphi kanti lo ?" There all turned to look at me

What do I say ...I have no energy for this I just need to lock my self in my room and cry , who could do
this to her ?

Uncle : hhayi khuluma Mani Sbahle !!!" His voice bold and loud , I wiped my tears and looked at him,
what do I have to do with what happens ? is my whereabouts going to bring her back ?

queen : kade ngasho ngathi lengane ikhohlakele for all we know she poisoned her aunt , "

mom : “ INI!! “

What the fuck !!

Nwabisa : with her Temper anything is possible with Sbahle , she once hit me with a glass "

" hawuuu " the room said , OK what's going on here ?

Didy : that a lie Nwabisa you know it !!"

Nwabisa : who you calling lie wena ain't I older than you ??"

I was frozen in the spot my mouth was dry I wanted to scream to every one and tell them shove it where
it does not shine , we just lost Aunt Thabi and already they looking for suspect just because this is my
mothers house its either me or my mother who will be responsible for killing her , forgetting the
parasite that come and go get in the house, I didn't want to look at my mother because I know she
probably crying there is nothing that hurts me the most then to see tears in her face .

Me : I went for a walk " I finally said “I left very early and was gone since this morning , i left the king
and Queen mother talking in this very same room when I left this morning“

Queen mother eyes were about to fall down I looked at her directly in the eyes till she looked always

" nakhoke umhlola wodwa lo , you getting married in few days time kumele engabe ugonqile uhgamba
ngo vivi ubuya at this time ? " one of the Aunts said

Uncle : uyandinda yini wengane "

Queen mother : are you even going to ask such, because to me it quite obvious she is nondidwa
ubuyephike ? “

Ooh am I no longer a killer now I’m a bitch ? wow this family does not stop to amaze me the thing that
come out of there mouth

Mom : “ sekwanele … ! everybody know s that Sbahle loves the outdoor we should be preparing for a
funeral but you all here attaching my daughter … “
I looked at mom wow , when did she get her voice back ?

I should be hurt by now but this whole fucked up interrogation was too amusing to me I found my self
chickling inside , Didy actually had to pinch me to stop laughing

Queen : you slowly forgetting your role in this family wena ! “ she pointed a figure at my mother “

Mom : “ I’m Queen last time I checked your reign has long passed when the old king died … so be
careful when talking about roles and how you address me “

Queen : “ yewena ukhuluma nobani kanjena … vele lento yakho iyumbulali , Even when her father died
she was last person seen with him ... Ukhohlakele unehliziyo yomthakathi , wen Bhengu tell abantu
Baka Mnguni about her before ayosihlaza lapha , I mean ziningi kabi izontombi eziziphathe kahle
laykhaya ezingagana kaMnguni not this thing ... "

OK this bitch had gone to far including my father name in this mediocre

I keep replaying those words in my head. I was looking at Queen mother speak , the things that came
out of her mouth , did she perhaps forgot that we just lost one of our own and already the house has
gang up on bring Sbahle down , I know for a fact that

Chronic blaming is a form of emotional abuse and often hurts just as much as physical pain does. Right
now i feel helpless over the blamer and a certain fear sets in , I see my Uncle coming to my direction.
Just as any other blamer he sees nothing wrong in blaming others for anything and everything. When
things go wrong in their own lives, someone else is always to blame and I'm in the receiving end --
nothing is ever their fault. They tend to be irrational therefore i just can't reason with them when they
already concluded about me killing my own favorite aunt or better yet me being the worse kind of a
bitch , but they gone to far by involving my father name in all of this just like a ticking boom I felt my
anger going from 0 to 100 in a split second ... It all make since now

the Dream oh my God she was warning me about this because she was already gone , I felt a lone tear
stream down my face
" ukukhala ngeku kukusize ... Where were you and you better tell me the truth or I will beat it out from
you uyezwa !! ? ?"

I looked at him his angry , his eyes are full of hate , I stood up and looked at him in the eye, I felt his
breathing change ,

Me : guilty people always blame others for there own mess Let's face it, being blamed for something i
didnt do must really hurt me and brake me down right ?....

I am innocent after all and its should hurts. But truth is the one thing that survivers do is never to be
intimidated by vultures , after all time and recriminations have past is to face a killer in the eye and say I
did not do it but ask them if they did it ...I mean what motive will I have to kill the only person that ever
showed me that she is family and cared for me genuinely ...

I've learned that anyone who accuses me of improper behavior is probably hiding something , You
most probably have a personal issues against me to pin this on me right ? , so i have heard all your
blame your insult i knowing this may not help much, even so, it is true. . . I don't care what you think of
me because jealousy, insecurity, and low self-esteem are coursing through your veins. The only way you
can feel your own importance is to spread lies , insult , abuse or gossip viciously about Me and my
mother bringing us down so that you can feel better about who you really are hungry greedy busted ,

He raised his hand attended to hit me

" lay one finger on her and that will be the last thing you will ever do !!"

I looked behind my uncle and there stood my lion king.

I smiled to my self " I know what you did and trust me , my existence will be your downfall "

.
.

To be continued

*** sorry for late post ...hope I'm forgiven****

chapter 27

*** unedited not at all guys****

Somewhere in Qwaqwa***

They entered as I slept. They called me by name, asking me to get up, get dressed. They were on a
schedule. I was still hungover by sleep I kept asking myself what going on , my vision was blurry shit my
glasses where are they

, something I rarely did I looked for them in panic .the smell of cigarette and weed alarmed me that this
were not my classmate i panicked

" Who are you ??"

I tasted stale cigarettes hands on my cheek shit got real , my only hope was to get my cellphone but
How since I'm blind as a mule without my spacs I looked around for my phone that was suddenly
missing , Its charger hung from the outlet , I wearily asked if one of the two men now standing in my
room knew where it was, of cause They did they were on a schedule and we couldn’t be late they kept
on saying , This is it my day to die my gut feeling told me that what ever is behind those door is my last
day on earth ,
, I heard one saying " Time’s up asshole"_

It was about 2:00 a.m. and the men grew agitated they started pushing me around , I so badly wanted
to turned away Nuzzling in my pillow just for the last time. My father always told me that sleep will be
my death I guess he was right because death came in night when I least expected it I remember thinking
this couldn’t be happening, not to me. The slapping the punching got me crying , but my mouth was
covers I could not scream , I tasted blood , and my stomach was badly injured , I was kicking trying to
block my already bruised faced I found shelter under my bed cover pulled it over my head , I was dizzy
and I think I fell asleep for a moment and awoke again when one of them pulled off my covers .
Grabbing one of the corners, I pulled hard and tried to bring the covers over my head ... Maybe they will
leave me already I'm crying like a girl after all .

" I'm sorry ... I'm sorry " I kept saying for what only God knows

" if you need money I can tell my uncle to give you , please I'm sorry ... Ooh God you hurting me "

A knee pressed into the small of my back and I briefly convulsed. It fuckin hurt me so bad , but it was not
compared on the helplessness me that was suffocating The man seemed like he was twice my height
and ten times my weight. I could feel everything, all of him, as he restrained me.

“I did not want to do this the hard way,” he said. I didn’t really know what this was, why was he even
doing this , When he let go of my arms and stood up, the meeker man stepped closer to the bed

" ngithe vuka nja!!! "

That deep Zulu accent it can not be missed , I knew it from somewhere ...

I was wearing my briefs and t-shirts and walking on foot on the quit corridor only my sniffs and silent
Cry's were heard , it was to quite the light gave me a clear vision of the goons that were dragging me out

The men reminded me of WWE wrestler both in appearance and demeanor.

I was kicked and pushed , I realised fighting was just a waist of my time

" hamba !!" They will shout at me pulling me by the arm

A could still feel the cold air rushed in blowing my already shivering body as if walking on cold tiles was
painful trying walking on wet grass in June month on your feet , in Free State no school guard was on
site or any classmate this was planned I knew this was a planned kidnapping this people know who I am.

The door opened leading me outside I froze as the Cold licked my face and crept under my clothes,
spreading across my skin like the lacy tide on a frigid winter beach. I licked my purple lips tinged with
blue and gently chattering teeth , The biting cold chilled my fingers into clumsy numbness, the cold
seeped into my toes and spread painfully throughout bare feet

I felt like crying they pushed me to walk i stopped as I felt big hands grabbing me ...no that that was not
grabbing he actually hit me on my back , I was grabbed by my shirt and hit from behind and lost my
footing I found my face tasting the soil ,

" God if this my time take me now ... I can not take this any more " i prayed in silence ... I prayed for
help ... For a miracle ... I was too weak I could not even open my eyes the way my face was badly
bruised now , i was cornered in the van with gun pointed on my face , I had no strength to fight or cry
for help now it was useless , my fate was close and I had accepted it.

My eyesight maybe be poor but my other senses made me aware that I was not alone in this van , I
heard someone coughing , his breathing indicated that they in pain like I am

“ hallo “

" this is not the time to cry ... When the car stop will need to fight or run "

" Mlondi ?"

Him : I'm sorry I could not protect you "

What does he mean by that , yes his big and grew up fast and more Street smart then i will ever be, but
I'm still older then him , I should be saying that to him

Him : bafo ... Mom told us this day will come and said we must run till we are ready to take back what
belong to us"

I could not believe what he just said I was afraid really afraid... I'm not ready I can't fight I'm book smart
this life was not for me .

I was never much of a fighter or talker they say I take after my father , so I nodded even though he can
not see me I know he knew that I did not agree to his plan , there was so many question I wanted to ask
him but I knew better than to piss my little brother off , we in this shit together and as always he has
figured out who's the enemy.

The light in the street shined trough the window and confirmed my suspicions , he is badly beaten up

They have done a number on him. He probably ran his mouth like he usually does and fought back and
angered the abductors , His once was white T-shirt was now red with blood , this was our doom this
was the end off us , I pray for my mother I will not see my sister I will not get the chance to protect I
hate this blood running trough my veins , our father cursed us because it has made me us have all this
enemies just because we have his blood.

I was a shivering mess now I was rubbing my arms trying to keep worm but no luck , I felt a huge blow
on my cheek I must have fallen asleep , I looked around and my eyes landed on him , I realised that the
car was no longer moving

“ finally the Prince is awake … I have been waiting for this day my whole life …"

" fuck you ...you fat pig " Mlondi spit out
Him : I'm going to enjoy killing you the take over has just begun "

I was still shocked at the man looking at me ,

" Malume ... Why ?" It came out as a whisper , I knew this man hates us but for him to kill us , what will
he gain ? You know when you look at death in the eye and trying to get all the answers and death blinks
first and you realize that nothing seems impossible he is planning on kill us either way.

Him : “ don’t act surprise this is more of take over , just like in the wild , When a new male coalition
takes over a pride, they always kill the prides' cubs, since they are not biologically related and do not
want to spend energy ensuring that other lions' genes will be passed on … so this my boys what I’m
about to do is insuring my blood line … I already took your father's seat , I'm already fucking your
mother so hard than soon she will give me an heir , will pimp your sister to the highest bidder but I just
have no use for you two so goodbye"

Me : you sick busted " I tried jumping him but I fist got to my face first made me fall back

Mlondi : you stupid old pig the difference in this story is that me and you share the same blood ... And
already what you planning to do to us will be no match what coming to you , you already have a wolf in
that house that is slowly getting hungry for blood ... You think killing us will get you what you want ...
Qawekazi will destroy you , never intimidate a women "

Me : you killed my father!!!"_

He laughed

Mlondi “ pull the trigger ...do it and see if you will ever find peace , you pathetic piece of shit ! “

I heard my brother cursing them while they beat him to a pulp he was always the rebellious one his
younger than me and he is just a daredevil kind of a person
" you going to wish you never said that "_

One of the goons said , but what so respectful about a man who takes power then earn it ,Mlondi tried
fighting every one of them was a ball of crying mass looking at what this people were doing to him

I Will admit it, I was scared, and I was pleading for my brothers life, they already dragged him out and I
have never seen people beat up a teenage boy like this , ganging on him kicking him , punching him.

my uncle pulled out a gun pointed at unconscious Mlodi who was laying life less on the ground I used my
last strength and jumped out of the van i ran after him but he turned and pulled the trigger at me I fall
down and crawled on top on my brother as the men fired his gun on my back they rolled our lifeless
body down the train tracks nd that’s when I hit the tracks I fractured the bone in my lower spine,

I was loosing lot of blood I looked at Mlondi one more time I heard heard gun shots and light was out
for me and i was unconscious …

I woke up screaming Mlondi name and realised I was in my room

“ same dream “ , my brother said walking in my room , handed me a glass of water

This shit happened 6 years ago but every day I relive it as if it was yesterday

I sigh as he helped me sit up his face told me there was something wrong

Me :what's wrong ?"

Him: we got two Zulu boys downstirs looking for us "

Me : what ? ...do you think ...?"

Mlondi : no its not him ...I already did background on them ..."

.narrated ***

Meanwhile Sbu and Banzi walked inside the office , it was just your typical office leather seat table and
CCTV screens

Sbu : how did you find them ?"

Banzi : I'm in a special forces and finding people is my speciality "

" I heard you have been asking about me " mlondi walked in , he was big muscular buffed up, tattoos all
over his arms his light skin and pink lips made him the ladies man , but there was something dark about
him

Sbu : it was more of looking for you "

Mlondi " its sounds like the same thing to me ...who are you and who sent you and how did you find me
?"

His eyes was on Banzi he was sizing him up, in fact

Banzi laughed " so many questions in one sentence which one must we answer first ? "
Mlondi : I see you have a death wish "

Sbu : boys come down firstly it was not hard finding you here mfethu you live e'qwaqwa and you call
your self Shaka the Zulu gangster "

Banzi chuckled

mlondi : you starting to piss me off!!" he pointed at Banzi

Sbu : look it a nice name I like it "

mlondi : " can you get to the point and this bull shit !!"

Banza : look I will love to answer all your questions but Mlondi Bhengu it's time you went back home "

Mlondi popped his eyes out he never thought that he will ever here that name especially in this place

Him : who are you? "

Banzi : we friends of the man that is planing on marriage your sister "

Him : my sister is happily married the last time I checked , '

Sbu seat down and crossed his leg

Sbu : so Sbahle name does not ring are bell ? "

" who are you vele? And tell us your business " said a guy in wheelchair he looked older than the guy
behind the desk
Sbu looked at him and put two and two together that the guy in wheelchair is Nsika Bhengu

Banzi : look to cut the matters short we know why you ran away and we know what happens to you. But
leaving in hiding is over now, your sister will need yo to walk her down the isle ... And Nsika your seat is
waiting for you ...let's just say your new brother in law just took your uncle or king down "_

To be continued

OK guys when I say not edited I mean not edited ,

to my new oxford dictionary readers aningixolele with your complains ... I'f you struggling to read junk
yekela phela and read more advance stories on Facebook ...

.Zihlobo zami I may be having my wine now but could not get drunk without dropping you an
inset hope you enjoy

chapter 28

Sbahle ***

“ Sbahle “ he indicated with his head calling me to his side the way he did it that was so HOT
If this was a movie I would have been running in slow motion to his arms not everyday you get the most
hottest man saving you from the enemy, I felt so emotional as I ran to him and buried my head on his
chest , tell me why I’m crying ? it more of seeing him right here … ooh and not forgetting my Aunt
Thabi died and non of this ‘people are moaning her death instead I’m the accused number one

Him : “ are you ok ? “

I nodded

Uncle : “ what’s the meaning of this Mnguni!! "

Mvelo : sorry to come unannounced but"

This men of mine so humble and respectful ,

Uncle : who do you think you are walking in my house as if you own it !!“

Mvelo and i chuckled , yohh this man like claiming things that are not his

Him : “ just came to get my wife your Highness “

So modest in his voice I dictates that his mocking him

Queen mother : “ what …. ? you can not be serious do you even know what this girl is capable off
?...kuyimanje ...“ he cut her off

Mvelo : “ with all due respect , lets not get to that right now I didn't come for stories , i just came to
get my wife and that it “

Uncle one : “ that’s not happening we have not gave her away to you “
He held my hand

Mvelo : “ customary laws disagree with you , I paid bridal price for her so technically she is my property
now “

I don't like the sound of being owned like this , but the way he said it means that his got me

Uncle : our culture disagree with this laws of yours ...so I may allow you speak to her but not in this way
you doing right now !"

Me : look king ," he was annoyed now "

there is no perfect way then the now , you raised a hand on my wife and I'm not sure she will ever be
safe in this house "

Mvelo said with a chilled voice this men of mine has a Queen on this chess game and was calculating his
move take , yes Mvelo is good looking , got body to die for , dress like a model but to me that just a
bonus of things that made me fall for him ...you know there is nothing so sexy like a man with brains
wow

Uncle : she still my daughter And if needed be I need to reprehend her "

Mvelo : by raising a hand at her ??"

Mvelo voice was loud , got my uncle shaking a bit

Uncle : its my house my rules , don't come here and change our ways uyezwa !!"

“ No wander you Bhengu man run your mouth like women ,its because you involve women in your
meetings ... Women if you may please excuse us “ that was Uncle Mzamo he was with another white
guy who looked like wow " sizzling " , the room became silent the minute this two walk in
Mvelo : “ take your Mother to the house I need to have a word with your uncle “

Me : “ok “

He whispered in my ear “ trust me “

This man want me to miss all the fun really now do I have to go?

I turned and looked at my mother , I didn’t have to say a word to her but she jumped on her feet

Queen : “ uyaphike wena ?because the king has not Instructed us to move "

I have never seen my mother carry her self like that before but she laughed

Mom : I will never disobey my in-laws what kind of a mother will be "_

Queen : your victory laugh will be short leaved when I tell them about what kind of daughter you raised

Mom : try your level best Queen mother and see where will that get you , "

Queen: nxa "

Mom laughed again " I always told you that I will have the last laugh... Don't get to upset and increase
your blood sugar level "

Uncle : “ Nontombi I didn't say you can leave "

Mom : I know ... But I'm leaving "

Uncle: if you walk out that door … “

Mom : “ uzowenzani ? ,beat me up ? rape me ? curse me ? or what kill me ? bring it on anginandaba I

told you that the only thing that is still keeping me alive in this house , that has made me endue
everything this family put me trough is my daughter and I’m glad that my late husband chose a perfect
suitor for her ,so right now i can do what ever i want I'm sure what they came to talk to you about is
more important than this bucking notice you doing ... "

Him : uthini ?"

“ haybooo ! “ the room said ,

Mom : speak to MY daughter in-laws be nice and try to be a gentleman , aish I forgot you don't have
that bone I inside of you "

she walked towards me I don’t know when or how the queen mother stood up so fast but she grabbed
my mothers arm

Queen : “ you do not get to disrespect us like this yezwa wena nondidwa “

I have never seen or head such a bitch slap like that in my life , it’s the kind of smack that will definitely
leave her deaf ,she fell Nwabisa rushed to help her mother

Nwabisa : kodwa Aunti ungaze umshaye uma , she old and ...'

Mom : don't start with me wena girl , you think I haven't notice that you and your evil mother have been
conspiring to get Sbahle fiancée, you think I don't know that your arranged husband disowned him self
from his family when his family paid your bridal price ...you tried so hard to be with him and he rejected
you ... Kuyimanje you sleepping with your father in-law , ....but jealousy got the best of you when you
saw the Mnguni , you wanted what my daughter have and you started spreading fucked up rumours
about Sbahle lesgodini "
Me : INI ?"_. I was beyond angry

Didy : I knew you were up to no Good you such s pathetic bitch"

" Dudu !!!" That was her father

Nwabisa was crying mess , she kneeled before my mother lags

Mom : don't ever think about touching me with does filthy hands wena !!"

Her : Maka'Sbahle I'm so sorry my. Mother forced me to do all does things "

Queen : you such a stupid girl nxa... Thula Mani vala lomlomo wakho"_

The people in the room were shocked like I was

Me : why ?"

Nwabisa : because you so young , wazini ngokuba undlokulu"

Me : wow !!"

Nwabisa : you don't deserve to be Queen ,...look at your self ..."

Didy mom : ukhohlakele Ntombazane !!"

Mom kicked her and she fell

Didy : “ Asshuuuu “ she was rolling on the floor with laugher

I on the other hand had hands on my mouth , the eyes in this room were all out about to fall out from
there socket

Mvelo : “ Sbahle go now “ I nodded , I pulled my mother hand and we walked out ,

Uncle : Nomtombi you will regret this day uyezwa "

Mom : fuck you and the rest of your family nxa "

"Thixo ..."

" yooh "

' hayboo ithini umakoti " this people were shocked that my mother insulted them ,

She was walking fast , yet I thought this was my escape but my mom just found a brake through

Me : are you OK " I held her arm , she stopped and looked at Me

“ ngikhathele ileyanja , I have suffered so much because of him and he think that everything i have been
trough I will take it just like that laying down he got another thing coming ,my plan to destroy him just
started "

Me : mom please come down , he is not that special or worth your energy "

She place a hand on my cheek

Her : this is my fight baby and I have been planning for years for this day and its finally here "

Me : I'm sorry you had to go through so much because of me "

Her : I was fulfilling your father wishes , he told me to take care of you no matter what ... "_

I hugged her as she cried

Me : its OK mom ..."

" Nontombi I'm I'm sorry you went trough all of that with out us knowing " it was Dudu mom and the
other Aunts ,

Mom laughed and wiped her tears

Her : I knew most of you knew but decided to to turn a blind eye on it"

I have seen my mother sad , crying or feeling all kind of weak but this crazy women standing next to me
right now I don’t know her,

Mom :Just saying out loud makes me cringe. You’re probably wondering why the hell I would even
consider staying , took every expect of abuse this family brought trough my life the answer is right in
front of you , i was a widow forcefully forced to marry a Man I did not love , you say it was culture....
that I may understand but seeing me bruises up and spoken to not even in manner that one will speak
to his Dog what was that ? Ignorance? As a women you decided to turn a blind eye to domestic violence
in this house "

Older Aunt : Nontombi I go trough what you go trough every day because Down here in Royal house,
domestic violence is common, very common, and I hate to say it, but it has became norm here as well.
Everyone knows it happens. Some do something about it, more so though, most don’t."

I was so shocked
One Aunt : It’s the culture. It’s just the way it is. Does it make it right? Nope, of course not. Is there
anything that can be done about it? Very little. . we take it all in for the sake of our children ..."

Dudu : ooh my God, i knew it , my last visit here i could hear it , i thought my mind was playing tricks on
me , Imagine the sounds of a fist hitting a woman and her screaming in pain. I was horrified. Having
grown up in a house of violence, I know that sound all too well and all my emotions went into overdrive
, I told my mother about it She said This is not our home or our territory. We are guest right now. Let’s
go, that the day we left for Capetown ... Ooh my God how could you mom "

I froze in my shoes.

Mom : because she didn’t fucking care"

At that exact moment I saw a police pick up truck and some few private cars parking outside my yard

Didy : why mom why ? I urged you to, please help her. He’s hurting her!!!

I was horrified that My jaw dropped.

Didy mom : its not easy being married to this family to this royal man my child , I have tried so many
things to help most women in this family , but i felt defeated and so so so sad. And helpless. But not only
that, i hate tunning a blind eye and saying this isn’t our home your father has programmed that into my
head for years now , he will constantly say that We are visitors here and this is there culture"

Mom: not yours ? , but ours !. It still doesn’t make it right but it’s just the way it is right ??"

She looked down

Mom : Women are not held in high regard here. They are to be used, raped and beaten. Not all, don’t
get me wrong, but a lot of us are and we pray just for helping hand and your had that has the power but
you listen to man ...its sad because you have a girl child , and women need to leave by example "
Didy mom: I'm really sorry

Me : It’s all so frustrating and completely heartbreaking that you were a silent killer , this is my country,
this is my home but will never say its my culture. I am a stranger in this land and all I can do is keep
trying, I pray that I will never be directly exposed to such violence again but if I am, I will, once again be a
voice for that women in need and try to help her, How can I turn a blind eye? How can I ignore the
screams and cries of a woman being beaten? If I my self I'm also a women , . . "

I looked at mom "she is a surviver and I'm proud to say that my mom is head strong , got all of us fooled
that she is weak but just like smoke she rise from the ashes , " I held her hand " let's go mom "

She took off her doke , rocking her natural long hair , I hugged Didy or let's just say she hugged me

Me : I'll call you OK"

Her : you better ...take care babe "

I opened Mom's car and she jumped in the passage seat I was not about to ask her if she ok , she clearly
not ok , she found her voice and alI i could do is listen to her when she is ready to talk

Mom : what is the police commissioner doing here ?"

She pointed at the police cars outside , I wander what my uncle is planning on doing I feared the worse ,
who called the policy and why ? I had to get my mother out of there she assaulted the Queen and
nwabisa , infrount of room filled with whiteness we arrived in Mvelo house later on ,

Mom : “ is this his house ? “

Me : “ yes mom … “

She nodded faintly smile

Me : go take a nap mom I'll cook you something "

We hugged " thank you sithandwa sami "

To be continued

chapter 29

unedited

Mlondi***

The way I have always viewed the world was trough the eyes of my parents , be responsible go to
school , go to college, get a girlfriend marry her and be a career / family man, my brother used to say ,
he is still that perfect guy , your perfect gentlemen the kind of guy that most women will love to call son
in-law , the family's Golden boy , yayaya !

I wish that people could say the same about me , but on the other and naah...

" my house my rules my boy , if you don't like it… here is the door " my father used to say

" ngizokushaya Mlondo yezwa " my mom

" why you such a bully. Nxa " my big sister - Thandiwe

" you so annoying get out of my room and leave me alone ..." My big brother - Nsika

" you so cool big brother " princess Sbahle used to say , going back home got me having mixed feeling.
Memories from my past came rushing in , I missed my sisters so much , I missed home and I hates that
our father died and left us with mess of his family..
My parents teachings still live in me though and ring in my ear , I was taught to never forget my
identities and become mature adults , most people lose sight of who they truly are if there are raised in
perfect family and trough the eyes of there parents ... My father told me to embrace who I am Be strong
when I’m weak. Be brave when I’m scared. Be humble when I’m victorious stay strong for my family no
matter what , take risk and don't bow to no one , rather die fighting then taking it lying down . My
Mother told that when it comes down to it, you could be the most successful person in the world, but it
will never satisfy you if you not true to yourself.

Being a middle child has made me not need love that much , parents mostly focus their attention on the
first born , last born or the soft weak child

“ Mlondi give your brother Jersey his feeling cold “ I remember my mom will say ,

Me : “ why mom ? “

Mom : “ because as much as his older then you , he will need you to be a big a brother to him , you
were born to be brave , courageous and strong , so I'm not saying be your brothers keeper but take care
of him when he need you the most “

I never thought what she said would come to reality one day , thinking back I was only 5 years when she
told me does exact same words . After my father passing I knew that I have to step up and men up .

You know this blood of mine… This surname …This status almost killed me, you know when the devil is
testing you and plans to bath in your blood just to have that power over you ... That how that pig felt
when he stood before up speaking in biblical term " today we rejoice as you will watch me bathe in the
blood of my enemies."_talking like a Supervillain as if Bathing in the blood of you enemies is that easy
as he said it.

First of all, ‘bathe‘ means to wash by immersing one’s body. Thus, a supervillain will either have to pack
a portable bathtub or transport gallons of blood and how practical is that yeah right! ....plans did go his
way because he did not make sure that we are really dead

I guess now The righteous shall rejoice when he see the vengeance: he shall wash his feet in the blood of
the wicked. [Psalm 58:10]... Hay don't look at me like that I went to Sunday school .

For years I have calculated the pigs move and I was not going seat and watch him take everything for us ,
that day Nsika took a bullet for me... for us and by God's grace we still alive , my brother lost his legs
and is wheelchair bound I lost my heart , It is said that all people are born good and that evil is
something that we learn. Yet, there are so many people who are just too good at being bad for it not to
be inherent and that just me right there . I have lack of empathy and feeling for others makes it
impossible to believe that it wasn’t a trait I was born with, that why even today it's hard for Nsika to
believe that I’m cold hearted ,
No matter how long he has known me my own blood brother probably don’t know anything real about
me , then just me being his crazy loud mouth brother who does not give a shit about anybody else. I
keep all aspects of my personal life and personality separate and secret from many people . It makes it
much easier to refrain from growing an attachment to others. . .and just like a chameleons camouflage
to the world.

To be honest I was never born to be like this , but life pushed me to it , life was beautiful growing up but
dark cloud came over us , there are days we slept with no food in Our stomach , no shelter over our
head , no cloths on our back , our body injured from the shooting infection taking its place ...

I had to stop crying and start making money for me and my brother , at the age of 15 years I had joined
gang, we were leaving in the shack then , I did not see a need to go back to school but made sure that
Nsika finish his matric and Furthered his studies , being hotheaded and fearless made me move rank in
my gang , when I turned 20 I was gang leader , made shit loud of money on illegal business, this blood
money gave my brother his qualification in Bcom accounting his now working for some big logistic
company and I'm so proud of him , I worry about his social life at times , and hope that he can move on
from what happened 6 years ago , as I seat in this place looking outside the window I wander if I will be
able to control myself from killing that man with my bare hands

" by the way thank you agreeing to cone with us "_

Sbu said to me seating next to me , I looked at Nsika he was reading a book , I knew i had to do this for
him to get closure maybe the nightmares will stop

Me : it not like it was by choice "

Sbu : “ I know , but tell me something why have you not avenged what you uncle did to you “

I laughed and continued to look outside my window

Me : “ who said I'm not ? "

I am killing him slowly with out him knowing , Sbu looked at me confused , I was not going to go into
detail , Not only am I very secretive about myself , that also applies with work projects . I love keeping
people in suspense , you never really know what I’m thinking or what’s my next move is. Instilling this
uncertainty in others gives me the power of surprise when making my next move

Banzi : you know for gangster your dealings are clean , no criminal record , no jail time … just tattoos and
this blond hair of yours “

This boy is really testing me

Me : “ because I aren’t no gangster , I’m a business man you dumb baboon , stop hating on me, it not
my fault that you ugly “

Banzi : wenja ...lalela LA ..."

Sbu : ok … ok gentleman cut it out! “

I bust out and laughed Banzi clicked his tongue and moves to another seat

Sbu : “ you know that if you continue to push him like this he will shoot you “

Me : “not if I shoot him first “

Sbu : “ you two are just the same …I give up might as well kill each other “ I chuckled and I joined him

I was about to answer him when the pilot announced that we need to buckle up as we about to land ,
we arrived in king shaka airport and my heart started beating very fast

i made my way to Nsika , I had to wheel him out

Me : you ok about this ?"

Nsika : I don't know and I'm unable to get hold of Thandiwe "

Our big sister is the only one that knows that we alive , we call each other on dummy phones and
destroy them later

Me : I swear to God if this is set up kuzochitheka igazi "

Him : can you come down , we both knew this day would come "

Me : yah I can believe princess is getting married "

Him : she probably hates us for leaving her , its like we abandoned her "

Me ; Mfethu don’t say that , We left something of ourselves behind when we left this place, we stayed
here , even though we were so far away. And there are things in us that we can find again only by going
back to our birthplace , she is all grown up now the only thing we could do is talk to her"

He nodded , he was tapping his hand on his chair he does this when his thing or nervous .

You know Finding ways to leave the past behind you is often the hardest thing anyone can do. But there
are things you need to let go of because it’s a necessary process to help one to survive , But it isn’t
always an easy thing for most of us.

One thing I'm sure of is that I didn't run away or hide I was in plain sight and waiting to strike. So in
other words I have successfully failed to let go and leave the past behind because my hush childhood
experience made me the man I am today and im like an animal craving blood right now .

I had to remind myself that leaving the past behind didn’t mean I didn’t care about my mom , my sister I
was protecting them in fact I just had to adapt to life’s never-changing realities that my family wants
me dead.

I leave in my head most of the time just being grateful and appreciate to have felt the love of parent of
worm home because I don't know if that will ever be a reality for me in the future.

what life experience taught me is that home is where the heart is …. And Bathakathi ready on Not I’m
coming for you .
.

To be continued

chapter 30

not edited at all ***

Trey ***

Mzamo " apparently the reason we are here it's because this morning we received a phone call from our
daughter in law crying "

Sbahle uncle : why was she crying? "

Mzamo : looks like she over heard you and your mother having a heated chat about how she is not
good enough for our family "

Uncle ; don't tell me you believe that deceitful girl , she is trying by all means to get our of this marriage
and you are listen to her vindictive lies "

Mzamo : so you are not skimming and planing something that maybe a treat to her life ?. . "
Queen : umbhedo lowo ...sizokwenzelani lokho ?"

Mzamo : can I stand ... In fact Let me stand ..."

Mzamo : you know why I hate greedy people? its because there always want more , think that they
have out smart every one else and they feel in titled to have it all "

One uncle : I'm sorry but where you going with this"_

Mzamo looked at him

Mzamo : do you know who we are ?"

He stood in front of Sbahle uncle ... " When you look at us you see idiots with fat dip pockets that you
can milk... ? " Sbahle uncle laughed you know that annoying Mocking laugh that made me angry

" I got my own money but by tradition vele you need to pay a bride price , and Sbahle is expensive
because she is also a princess "

Me : you talk about her as if she an item ?"_

Queen : listen hear boy you do not come here with your fancy English and question our culture ?? "

Me : you know that the greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge ..

you think you got this all figured out , it's either you underestimates or overestimates us ,your mind is
capable of being quick to judge "

Sba/uncle : looks like you also haven painted this picture of us that we are after your money "_
Me : if its not the case than why you conspiring to snatch this marriage from Sbahle after you assumed
who we are "_

Sba/uncle : how can we snatch something esibikiwe nasedlozini "_

Me : I was coming to that " I snapped my figures " thank you for reminding me of that so why you think
I'm more suited to be your in-laws instead of Nontombi " I looked at the Queen mother , One of the
most powerful means of communicating with others non verbally is by calling up your most piercing,
incisive eye contact.

I sometimes also call this the “death stare” or the “predatory look.” It’s the ability to stare into someone
else and make her feel as though you’re staring directly into her soul... This will make her fear what you
can see , and give her unsettling feeling about how much do you know about her ...already she is shifting
uncomfortable on her sit i got her where i want her ...she is scared terrified, she already calculating what
im preparing to DO her, though she can only guess but never come up with a conclusive answer but
with a question that ask " WHAT."

Queen : all I said was that ... She not good enough to be Queen there I said it !!"

I chuckled and set back

Mzamo ; do you understand the nature and consequence of your actions...you will do anything to make
sure she does not marry my nephew here...right ?"_

Queen "honest fact I'm trying to help you here saving you form that wicket child, your nephew deserve
better "_

Sbahle uncle :I agree with the Queen mother and we apologize if you feel that way about us
Mkhwenyana and please rest assured that what ever lies that Sbahle feed you about this family its not
true , we are highly respected people in this community and our aliens with you is more important we
can not allow an irresponsible child to destroy what we have built"

He looked at me rubbing his hands together

Austin yawned " and yet you said this was not about money , so you thought about this when before or
after you found our that Mvelo is king ?"

Queen : what did you say white boy?"

Mzamo : you see you Magogo I like you , you are an open book , the problem with the rest of you is
that you underestimate your opponent, but i cant blame you, you the most cunning bastard there
could be. "

Sba/Uncle : I'm not going to sit here and be insulted by you fuck your money if you want to withdraw
from this arrangement do that ...there are plenty fish in the sea that will take Sbahle

Me : take?"

I hate how he thinks that his in control of Sbahle life

Him : my daughter my choice "

Me : I plan to merry her with or without your blessing amginamsebenzi ukuthi what you think of her
....and call her a thing or item you wish to sell uzonya yezwa !!!"

Queen : yoo she has bewitch you loyamthakathi "_

Me : she must have learned from the best ... She leaned from you "

Queen : yoo nansi ingulube unginonela '

Austin : ooh God does she ever shut up !!"

" listen here boys that not how you address the Queen " one man stood up
Austin : ooh fuck that shit she ain't no Queen of mine " Austin pointed a finger at him , voices were
raised every one talking over each other , mind you there only Three of us with about seven Zulu man in
this room , Austin is a red neck the way he is so pumped up right now , he had even turned Red

Sbahle : Enough!!! Just shut the fuck up!!!... You boys don't have respect you come to my fathers house
and speak to us like this !???.. We may not be rich , smart like you but we do not deserve to be attacked
in our own home by you. .phumani LA !!!"

Mzamo set down

Mzamo : we still talking and raise your voice at me one more time you and I will have a bigger problem
than what we have right now seat down and listen to me !"

Fuck the way he said it he just made the whole room submissive

Mzamo :...listen here I'm not attacking you but telling you shit that you already know about your self
you trying so hard disguise yourselves as one who is innocent and gullible or try to project a different
persona in the presence of others were you not the one accusing My daughter in law for murder few
minutes ago ..."

"She was the last person seen with my wife we were trying to get answers " one uncle said looking down
OK he is Thabi husband

Me : but accusing her of murder was it the right thing to do?"_

Queen: trust me you don't know that girl , she also killed her father , why is she always the last one to
be seen m with a person before they die?"_

I was angry I felt my heart beat changing ,

Me : uthini !!"
Queen : that girl is a bitch , we only gave her away because you insisted , but she is a devil herself , she
even has a mark on her back "

I ran my hands on my face

Mzamo whistled : maGogo that mouth of yours is pushing my hand ... " he took out his phone and typed
a massage

Sba/Uncle : who you calling ?"_

Mzamo : again I'm going to ask you this Do you know who I am ? Clearly you don't , don't be fooled by
this expensive suite and thing we don't get our hands dirty we kill for the ones we love ...you have gone
to far ...and right now princess Sbahle is our own and ohh boy do we love her"

I saw the man in this room shake there heads this people hate Sbahle what ever rubbish they have been
feed it has made them stereotype.

Mzamo : This greed , jealousy and envy towards Nontombis kids

Has kept you on your toes for years you did unthinkable things and you got away with it , your so
power hungry and your stupid minds gave you the idea that you're untouchable and you got sloppy or
lazy to clean up your mess right now the cops are searching your house maGogo for the poison you
used to kill the sweet Aunty Thabi oh and Bhengu why would you but such a deadly substance with your
credit card "

Queen : INI!...." She stood up rushed to the window she panicked when she saw the police cars outside

Thank husband : ma you killed my wife ?"

The police siren made her panic even more

Queen : Bhengu do something !!!!.."

He just place his hands on his face

Me : what can he do because we believe that in this very same house there is elephant and rhino ivory
... Am I wrong father in law ? "

Another uncle : I'm not going down for this yezwa !" he took out his gun and pointed at us

Austin : tell that to the constable ... "

Mzamo : do you have whiskey in this house ?"_

Thabi husband : you mother fucker you killed my wife and that witch you call your mother " he wanted
to jump them but they held him back

Austin : ooh look I found the whisky " he was holding a bottle whisky and three glasses

The commotion in the house made me chuckle , Queen mother was slapping Bhengu he was out of it ,
one uncle was crying on Mzamo feet

" I'm sorry , please don't do this us we got families .. Kids to support I can't go to jail " he was talking to
deaf ears

Austin : I took a sealed bottle you may never know with this people "

Me : with all the money we gave him he stil buys cheep stuff " we bust out and laugh

Queen : I said do something you stupid man "

" who are you " he finally asked reality kicked in that shit just hit the fan

Me ; your worse nightmare ...."

Him : but why we have never done you wrong "

Mzamo : have you ever asked yourself why we chose this family and we were willing to pay anything to
get Sibahle?"

I laughed and stood up after receiving a notification from Sbu that there outside

Me : because as much as you can kill a person igazi lomuntu liyakhuluma ... Through his kids "

The door open and Nsika was wheeled in by Sbu , Mlondi followed and walked in "hello family I'm
home!! Greet the party has started " he said the faces in this room were priceless Queen mother fainted
... I laughed

Me : my work here ...is done

Zihlobo zami kade nganicina sorry for not posting izolo ...but nansi eyokulala

I'm sorry about grammar and spelling ... but had to drop one ... you now what to do

chapter 31

.
"

Sbhle ***

mom took a nap , while I made her food , we have been here for hours now but Mvelo has not called or
texted , I was loosing my mind no doubt , curiosity was killing me I made my way to the guest room
and found mom just looking into space ,

me : “ hay are you ok “

her : “ I’m not going back to that house “

she started braking down and I rushed to her

“ I cant , I wont …”

Me : “ shuuuu mom I wont allow it mom ,I promise you I will not allow no one to force you to do
anything you don’t want to do …“

She just wailed I guess she is replaying the traumatic experience she ever went trough in that house , I
suck at comforting people and her tears just cause me to tear up as well , somehow I feel like this was
all my fault , she stayed because of me , she suffered because of me. Looking from the outside, you
would think when someone finally escapes an abusive relationship, the worst is over, No more torture,
No more hell. No more emotional blackmail or physical violence. And with the source of the hurt
removed, healing can begin, But after the external danger is gone, and the abuser is out of the picture,
the survivor’s internal journey is only beginning, And parts of it can, surprisingly, be tougher and more
painful, in a way, than the suffering they endured at the hands of their tormentor.
Her : 6 years of my life I spend in that house hoping this day will come , It was hell that bloody mother
fucker He tore me into shreds for 6 year … 6 years !!!. He abused me mentally, physically, emotionally
and sexually I lost friends, family, anyone I was close to. He made sure he was the only person in my life
so that if he was gone I had no one where am I going to start picking up the pieces ?"

Me : by admitting you need help that is the first step the rest will follow "

She wiped her tears and looked at me

Me : I'm so sorry you were alone... And you went trough that , a part of me wish i could take the pain
away "

Her : ooh baby ... You will know one day the sacrifice a mother has to do for her children , we are born
like that we protect we shield and we give the most warmest love "

She held my face " I'll be ok baby ... It may Not today , tomorrow next month, next year but one day I
will "

Me : I'm going to be right here next to you all the way "

Her : I know sithandwa sami ... I just wish I can find strength to pic up this million pieces I call my life "_I
held her hand

Me : look mom Leaving an abusive relationship and trying to rebuild your life it’s a traumatic journey .
You will still have issues demons that you will need to deal with on daily bases , someday will be your
highest happy as ever and care free and some days will be your lows, it's normal to feel down once in a
while, but if you're sad most of the time and it affects your daily life, you may suffer from clinical
depression ...."

Her : stop warring to much baby ... I'll be ok "

Me : mom no ! you not ok and there is no shame to say I'm not ok , I'm grown women now about to be
Someone's wife , stop treating me like a kid , I know you hurt , confused sad and worse past emotionally
unstable let me help you now "

Her : Sbahle"

Me : mom all I’m trying to say is that let me walk with you It’s not a quick process and you need
someone to

To guide you and help you understand how to

be gentle to yourself, help others to understand if they don’t, get rid of toxic people in your life and
learn to love yourself. Do what is best for you and don’t worry about what others think "

She stood up and walked to the balcony ,

Me : I already lost one parent because of that family and I'm not going lose another...we going to report
him "

Her : you know I did try that reporting him , asking for help , but no one ever believed me or paid
attention to me , If I could describe the impact and aftermath of emotional abuse in one word, it would
be invisible. Emotional abuse may leave no physical marks, but the depth of the scars and the weight of
the pain creates a burden that people can’t see—or don’t want to see especially in my case I was Queen
had no right to speak I'll of the king , he had power and money and got away with it ,he told his family
that I'm wicked trying to taint his name and the Bhengu name ,meeting was held lesgodini and the
people were told about my actions , I was called all sort of names even scared to even leave the house
buy my in-laws were worse I took it all in there beatings did not hurt me ... It may have left scars and
bruises , but what hurt the most was the names his family will call me … “

Me : “why did you agree to this mom? , you knew what kind of man he was … why you never left mom ?
?"

She folded her arms and tried hugging herself

Her : it was arranged , forced marriage for him to get my husband estate ,I gave him excess to your
fathers business account so that he may set me free , but in his twisted mind we were already in love ,
he was leaving in his own fantasy world talking about our future and how long he waited for us to be
together , but little did I know that he was obsessed with me , I removed my womb when he told me I
must give him an heir , I told him to take second wife since I can not give him children after a year of him
sexual violating me "

She laughed

Her : He said he will never love another women the way he loves, I didn't know his medical records but I
believe that he was bipolar "

Me : mom ... You could have ran away ..."

Her : he told me that I will never see my boys again he showed me picture of them being badly beaten
there was so much blood , Mlondi stopped moving , he had a gun pointed at them "

Me ; ooh my God "

Her : so I stayed, played a role a perfect wife three years down the line I attempted to run away again he
told me nasty things that he will do to you and he will later auction you to the highest bidder yet again I
stayed ...

, I put you in that school to protect you not because I hate you , only me had excess to visit you , he was
furious ... I cut all visitation right and wanted you be locked away because I rather suffer alone than with
you , God knows i did not truest him "

I hugged her from behind I was crying mess

Her :The turmoil was relentless. The few people I shared this with were oblivious to any abuse. Their
empathy quickly turned to excuses for that mans irrational behavior. They’d never witnessed any of it,
so I am wondering if they ever really believed me or maybe thought I exaggerated the truth. The ups
and downs became a regular gig in the days and months of that shit I call a marriage.

It never stopped or slowed down. It was and is a toxic cycle in any abusive relationships. There were no
normal days, someone or something would cause a trigger reaction where there would be arguing,
threats, and intimidation, then denial, blaming, and saying I caused him to act that way. There was never
an apology, but there was always a guaranteed silent treatment that followed and lasted for days. The
communication just stop , as obedient I responded with " yes baba " ...

" uma baba ethanda ngizokwenza "

My voice was gone not that i did mind I was just tired , I became invisible, as well as my feelings parish
into thin air ,

The times I wanted to leave were immeasurable. He was an expert at convincing me I would never make
it on my own and that my kids hate me . Self-doubt was inevitable. The abuse became such a profound
part of my life, yet I stayed. The level of toxicity increased through the years. I became very depressed
one thing that kept me going was your smile , wise words strong ability I saw your father in you , I lost so
much Sbahle and I made a decision that the minute you go to varsity I would take my life .. "

Me : “ you stayed because of me ? “

Her : “ not you ... All of my children have you ever heard that saying that says 'God could not be every
where but he a mother '. Blessed is a mother that would give up part of her soul for her children ... a
mothers scarifies jump all boundaries , I had to protect you … you was the only thing that made me
take it all ,…. The man was psychopath he used my children to have his way with me “

Me : I'm so sorry ma " I pulled her for a jug

Her : I'm free baby thank you ... "

She free yes but she is still emotionally chained , we cried in each other arms , I wish my father was still
alive mom need his hug

" ma " a big male voice echoed in our room no...no it can not be !

I turned around and held my mouth in shock

Mom : Nsika ....is that you ?.....ooh Mtanami " she cried and I looked at my brother tears gushing down

I looked as they cried in each other arms he still looks more like my grandfather , round face big eyes, I
wish I could see how tall he is but he was in the wheelchair , he kept saying his sorry , his sorry ... But he
was the oldest boy in my mother children but decide to Leave us

He never ever spoke up even when they sold mom to that monster or even fought for for our fathers
legacy , Nsika was 18 when our father died surely he could have done something ,

" its OK my boy you here now "

" you went trough all that alone , I'm really sorry mom " ooh Fuck him what will sorry help ? But his my
brother his here if his in wheelchair chair may mean that the pig put him there ,

Should i join in on a hug ?...should cry with them to , I froze on the spot , I didn't know what to do , I
was born into a loving, up-class family, where were sibling rivalries that surfaced daily but it was just
normal thing because our parents taught us to love each other never sleep without resolving our issues .
But, like most families, the most important things we were a strong as a team. As we grew up, some
remained closer than others , after my fathers passing everything went south. My sister was already
married living in another country ,my brother were living there own life and I became daddy little girl he
was my best friend and we spend lot of time together .
The only time I remember where me and my siblings were together it was my on sister wedding there is
a photo of us linking arms on that day Smiling at the camera that was the last time I recall having
siblings.

And tragic hit us when we least expected Dad died , I looked around me and I notice that my world is
gone

When a parent dies as youngest i Needed my big sister or big brother to seek solace from them .
Thandiwe was married did not even stay long after the funeral, Nsika just mourned alone and was on his
own bubble , Mlondi started a habit of smoking and did God knows what , him being high all the time
was no use for me , no one step up or shown any interest to help me immensely in the healing process.
Adjusting to the death of a parent is made easier when you have siblings going through the same grief
together but yet again i was alone , this moment right here is bitter sweet for me , I miss my brother
...but do I really need him now ? I looked up and saw mvelo looking at me with a worry look , I found my
step I passed mother and Son having a tearful emotional reunion hugging and kissing mom thanking God
, Nsika saying sorry , i looked at him our eyes locked as I passed him

" Princess ..." He called out he has my father voice now , I stopped but did not look at him ,

Him " Sbahle ...Sisi Wami ... Mtaka ma " He called out again but I found my feet walking to the arms of
the man that I have known for few months but has shown me that he will move heaven and earth just
to be with me

Him: its OK " he pulled me to his arms as we walked to the main bedroom he took of his shoes jumped
in the bed and cuddle me , his hold alone reassured me that I'm safe with him

Me : is Mlondi alive " I finally asked

Him : yes "

I held my breath thinking about him , is he OK did he lose a limp as well ?

Him : his fine Sthadwa sami ... "

I breath out

Me : where did you find them ?"

I know that his the one responsible for my brothers coming back ,

Him : Qwaqwa ..."

I nodded , I can feel his chest moving he has so may questions about my actions back in the other room
but right now its not the time , I don't know how I feel

Me : please give me time ... I don't know how I feel right now "

Him : its ok " he kissed my forehead ,

I closed my eyes wondering if it was not for this man right here if he was not in my life would my
brothers have or would they have not come back home ??

To be continue due to high demand and inbox massages about next inset I posted without editing ...
yoo Zihlobo idrama engaka

chapter 32

unedited

Mlondi ****
I had paid the Police commissioner to give me just 5 days with my Uncle he can arrest the rest I don't
give a fuck but this man here I still want to bond with him , I haven't touched him but I just had few
minutes of looking him in the eye just to instil fear in him , I had hoped that Nsika will find closure in this
fucked up reunion but expected he acted like pussy and asked for Maka’Sbahle fuck my brother is softy.

So here I am setting on the coffee table looking at him

Me : “ bhoooooh ! ! ! “ he jumped and I bust out and laughed

Me : “ you so funny wow that look …hold up did you pee yourself ? ”

Him : you alive ? … but how ? I mean … “

Me : “no! I’m a ghost … “ I opened my eyes giving a scary look I bust out and sniggered at his expression

Me : “ it's crazy that you shot me four times and I survived ,thinking about it who is on his right mind
shoot a teenage boy four times ? “

He looked down , I don’t want his pity or sorry right now I want him to be the mighty man he was 6
years ago

Me : konje what did you call it? ………….” A TAKE OVER ... BATH IN THE ENEMY BLOOD!1 “

I laughed at him the way his trembling right now its so funny no high and mighty I see.

Even this day I could not believe that I surviving numerous gunshots , and miraculous I’m on my feet…
doctors who have treated my gunshot wounds say that being shot is not automatically a death
sentence. .. but in my case I was suppose to have been dead “It’s a matter of total, straight luck, and I
need to thank my God or Idlozi ”

Me : you know what the Dr told me ? “

He just looked at me

Me : ooh well I will tell you any way he said ‘ How can I get so many bullets in my chest, the groin, the
abdomen and extremities and not have a lethal injury its pretty remarkable,”

Him : “ I’m really sorry , I do not know what gotten over me , I swear to God I did not plan to kill you , I
was badly influence by the Queen and the elders they told me that if I do not kill you will kill me , … “

Me : “ I do not believe that your sorry , what I know for a fact is that you killed my father because you
wanted my mother , you always have this obsession and infatuation about her so you decided to kill the
competition .… and used us as collateral for you to have your way with her “

“ I saw her first and your father took her from me !!…. “ he road

I clapped my hands “ wow bravo , now we getting somewhere , here is the man I wanted to see , finally
you came out to play ! “

Him : “ fuck you busted .. What you going to do kill me now!!! “

I touched my chest in shock

Me : “ weee hold your horses don’t get over yourself death is way to easy for you my dearest uncle … “

Him : “ I should have killed you ! “

Me : “ yah you should have …I know it hurt to see me here … but guess what i'm loving it “

He chugged to me and tried punching me but I punched him first he fell down and I gave him a mother
of kicks in his abdomen

Him : “ aahhhhh “

Me : “ I’m sorry … “ I kicked him

“ I didn’t to mean to hit you “ kick on the face

“ so be a good boy and stay here “ kick so bad that he started coughing blood

“ while consult with abaphansi on what I must do to you , who knows maybe the dead do not want you
either “ I spit on him bloody mother fucker nxa

Him : you know if I get out of here I swear to GOD I will destroy you “ he said crying in agony

Sbu walked in with plate of food , he made himself at home I see , Banzi was somewhere in the house on
his phone … , I have ordered that all the guards and man that were working with my uncle to be killed ,
I wouldn’t have done this alone with out Sunny he is one of the Guards that was my eyes and ears in
this place , his father was a loyal servant to my father and he told me that he will do anything that will
help take my Uncle down

Me : “ Sunny my man “

Him : “ Boy … it's done “

We fist bump ,

Sunny: “ I really missed getting my hands dirty fuck what a trill “

I laughed and asked Sunny to take my uncle to the back room I heard him cry in vain when I turned
around he was bleeding on the floor

Me : “ what the fuck Sunny ??? “

Him : “ he was not cooperating when I asked him to move “ Sunny wiped the knife with my uncles shirt
as he pulled him and dragged him

, I looked at him he shrunk his shoulders me and Sbu bust out and laughed

Me : I need to smoke dude you crazy “ I made may my way out

I took out my lighter and plaid with it , smoking in my father yard will not be ideal move unless I want
him to jump off the grave and strangle me , fuck I need to quite this shit . I walked around my birth
place and a flood of memory rush in , this place has not changed that much , its just looks like more of
an estate or gated community not like olden days when this place use to have thousands rondavel , now
it's big mansion house . I stopped and looked at my father's house , the lights were on Sunny did tell Me
that when Sbahle visit she stays at my father house , I looked at it debating if I should walk in or not , I
continued walking …

i made my way to my father grave instead, it's clean I'm guessing maka Sbahle spend more days here
then in her house , I looked at the engrave stone and a vase of fresh pink and white tulips, yep my
mother was here this are her favourite flower, the engrave message on his tomb was so touching , I
looked at it as if my father will just show up , I had a lot to say but didn't know where to start , yet again
that same feeling I felt when he died came back I felt blank and numb at his funeral I wasn’t able to
make myself cry , even though I knew people expected me to , I just couldn’t feel anything at all . I’m not
sure if I was angry that he died or angry at myself that I never got the chance to bond with my father I
was good at making him angry but to have one on one bonding session was one of those rare moments
if there were non at all.

For years after his passing , I'd feel the same way – hollowed out, they say my mother's grief remained
raw and intense never diminishing as the years passed I had witness glimpse of it before we were
shipped away to our doom , I puzzled over it at times , as my parents had had so many stormy
arguments during my childhood. . . most of them I was the caused,

My father wanted to teach me how to be responsible and discipline , while my mother argued that I’m
still young he must let me be I will find my footing when time comes , It was only when I became an
adult that I realized love and discord can often coexist this people love each other but mostly loved
there children more than anything .

Over time, that strange cold blankness inside me melted away as I started to understand the emotional,
cultural and social barriers that prevented my father and I from truly knowing each other, I started to
piece together things that I had overlooked or taken for granted, the gestures and the few words or
glances that cumulatively indicated that we were dear to him. I smiled as I reflecting on my life , I
remembered the day my father took me to this very same family burial ground

My Dad gazed around the cemetery and said: “Look at all those stones, Mlondi. Each one represents a
life. Marriages, divorces, losses, financial struggles, successes. We all spend our lives trying to avoid this
place but death is inevitable. I guess the trick is to live a good life.” I never forgot my father’s remarks.
We are all born terminal, as he used to say. . . looking at it now he was indirectly preparing me for the
day he will pass on , I moaned him like any other child will do to his parent , but I easy let go of holding
on to him and wishing his alive but lived through his teaching , I may not be perfect but I try never to
disappoint him , he may not be around but I know he is looking down on me .My father was a simple
men with a heart of Gold and lived for his family loved us to death , my Goal is to fill those big shoes he
left behind , I have protected my brother and now I need to do the same with my mother and sister .
Its been 6 years since he passed, What I regret the most is how many times I just wanted to hug my
father and tell him how much I loved him. Pride and ego got in the way, but I’m here now I can not
change the past but I can leave for the now .

I breath out loud as I crouch down ,

Me: thank you for keeping our family safe , I know it was hard fighting an enemy called family ... I hope
you proud of the man I turned out to be ... I miss and love baba Ka Sbahle "

wiped my tears and prayed " forgive me father for I have seen , I'm not perfect , Remember that and try
to forgive me when I fail you. Lord please forgive me for my sinning, I ain't saying that I'm finished but
I'm praying in advance Cause the devil is lie when he thinks I’m not going to avenge my father's death
and the agony my family went trough "

I walked back to the house I felt a bit light then when i walk in this yard I looked at my father's house
one more time before walking to my uncle house to start the games of torture .

To be continued

chapter 33

Sbahle ****

I woke up alone in my bed , and it was morning Mvelo was not on sight but he left his scent lingering in
this room

I haven’t slept like this in years I felt so safe in his arms that must have doze off and passed out.

I walk to the bathroom to do my hygin process there was new toletrie and it was ‘oh so heavenly
product ‘ the same product are use only difference this are new , I smiled to myself and how did he
know this ?

I decided to jump in the bathtub and shocked myself .

Yesterday even came rushing in and I found myself going under water because they just became to noisy
I don't on how on earth am I going to face my brothers ,I have relieved this day so many times in my
head but when it finally come I don't know how to act what to do or what to say , am I angry , sad ,
disappointed or just happy … I don’t know.

Two months from now would have marks 7 long years since I have spoken or seen my siblings if they
did not show up yesterday . . . how do I deal with that good lord I do not know .

This whole reuniting of family made me think of my sister as well , The last time I spoke to my sister
was on my father funeral

' be strong ok " she gave me a cold hug as if I was wet or stinking , she drove off to her posh lifestyle she
was in hurry going to Brazil with her husband and was not going to be held back buy a funeral and
family feud .

I was 12 years old we she left , we were years apart but still she was my big sister a phone call would
have made my day , But She was “too busy” I tried to call her for several weeks and sent many
unanswered texts. When I open her contact on my phone, which hardly happens anymore, I saw trailing
line of orphaned blue tick massages from me to her .

I look at her Facebook stream every once in a while when i had phone back then and I could see that
she seems to be enjoying life with no need for a sister or mother. Photos of trips, ,new cloths , new cars
all the bling and the glam but no letter no email no call to me just to see how I was holding up .

It’s possible she will come around again my mom will say , but this time seems different, This time
seems more final. I’m done riding this roller coaster where she is the only one in the driver’s seat I have
told myself that I have no sister the day of my memulo when she did not show up , but Told Nwabisa
that she happy I'm finally moving out from home and I must use this passage wisely, would it have been
hard for her to tell me that.

And now I have this issue of my brother behind that door. As much as fear that our circumstances might
have been similar , we were under our uncles oppression in different way , but would they have come
back home Without me taking the lead, technically I did because Mvelo felt that as my hubby he need to
step up and make me happy and change my living condition in that house , so now my brother are here
and I need to reunite and reconcile with them which seems unlikely, since I’ve always played the role of
the initiator, I’m losing respect for this people who call themself my siblings they just seems not care my
mother almost die in that house and was sinking in depression , she needed to be rescued , but my big
sister turned a blind eye , Nsika just did what he does best and keep his head down . I understand he
was young then but hallo his grown ass man , he could have made his move years back I feel like this
people I call my siblings There disloyalty is repulsive towards me.

After drowning myself in endless thought I rose under water , that has turned cold which made me ask
myself how long was I under ?

After draining the tub , I dried myself and wrapped myself in towel when I stepped of the bath room I
found the sliding door open and Mvelo was standing outside he was on his shorts and golf T-shirt , I love
how thick and rich his hair is and that he does not put that much effort in it , it was let loose but still
looked so hot regardless , he smelled so good that I wish I could hug him , he was on call a, video call
" but daddy you promise "

Him : I know pumpkin but i told you that the Queen is not feeling well “

Her : did you rub her back and sang her lalabye like you do to princess "

I could not see him but I could tell he was smiling , Zithelo is a talkative child for her age , she bubble
Mvelo always say that she is like her big sister Pam , I listen to them talk and laugh it was beautiful
moment to watch , Mvelo is great father no doubt and sometimes I see my father in his in him , I guess
it true that Women who enjoy good childhood relationships with their fathers are more likely to fall in
love with a man that resemble their dad

" I love you too pumkin"

He turned around after blowing million of kisses and our eyes meet , his face light up when he speak to
his daughter

Him : ooh Good morning "

Me :morning "

Him : “ Zee say high “

Me: “ I heard … “

Him : “ how long have you been standing there “

Me : “ long enough ... “

He side smiled , he did not move but continued to look at me he rested on his side and lean on the door
frame , he looked at me from toe to head ooh shoot I'm only wearing a towel a very short towel he
chew his inside cheek , I need to run fast

Him :wow you got beautiful legs "

" thank you " I looked around … yes closet now Sbahle ,I rushed to the closet but felt hands touch my
shoulder I froze ooh God , his hands ran on my back he did not talk but the gentle feeling of his hands on
my bereskin gave me tingling feeling , it was like he was touching something that's fragile he caressed
me so softly , careful, intentional, and thoughtfully , My body immediately felt things I did not know they
existed , his touch relays a multitude of messages, from sexual attraction to deep admiration … I did not
know what he was doing and why his hand suddenly stroke my back gently , he gently loosen my towel ,
I gasped and grabbed it on my chest so tight my back was exposed I felt the towel rest on my waist.

" its beautiful ...." He said in my ear " you are beautiful " .... He continue to take my breath away by each
whisper and touch I could feel his breath on my skin , Warmth radiating through me and really
contented, like I’m wrapped in a warm blanket instead. Yet so nervous and completely vulnerable. I
then become aware of what I’m feeling and i feel shame straight after I desperately hoped that he does
not pic up how such a small act has such a huge affect on me , I was getting , redder and prayed that my
facial colour doesn’t betray me .

Him : baby what does it mean?"

I was lost I felt him moving my towel up and I pulled it and re-tie it up , I felt volcano on my body
erupting , why my felling like this , wait what did he ask me ? I was nervous but yet I wish his hands
were still on my bare skin , I could not face him , I’m scared on what might happened , ooh God am I
really arose ?

His lips were on my neck. He kissed me I held my breath letting out a whisper of sound , he is way to
tall and I feel like a midget under his hold , he hugged me from behind his heart rate was beating
abnormally fast as well,

Him : the tattoo babe what does it mean "

Where is this damn voice when you need it ,

And why am I suddenly feeling like this with him ? I mean I have held his hand and even cuddled with
him never once has he been this close to me, to my skin , I was hot my breathing change , shit I gotta
pee

" I…i..t ...I..its my father name "

He kissed my neck ,

Him : its beautiful stop hiding it. . ., I asked Zoe to buy you few clothes since you and her have same
taste hope you will find everything in the closet "

Me : “ what ?... I mean how ? “ I turned

And he attacked me with a kiss and left me panting after few minutes

Him : “I think you need to go get dress “

I nodded

Me : thank you " he kissed my cheek

Him : go get dressed ... , “ he popped his eyes and I giggled I dashed off , I entered the closet I placed my
back on the door

" what the fuck was that ?" I held my neck where his lip left wet kissed and my cheek I opened my eyes
coming down from my high ,

Me : “ hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhha! “

Him : “ what’s wrong …. “ he asked on the other room

Me : Nothing , im good … “ he chuckled

I almost dropped down when I realised how full the closet was , this is not few clothes , I ran my hands
on top jeans, dresses , tops and my favourite shoes , tackiest , snickers I jumped up and down in
excitement , ooh God its like I died and woke up in closet heaven , I jumped into baby pink above the
knee dress. It hugged me and show off my assets , I let my braids lose , dragged my flops and I was out
surprisingly Mvelo was still in our room laying on his back on the couch with his knees high he was on his
phone , should I be worried about him always on his phone every time he gets a moment away from me
?

" spit it out "

Me : mmm" he did not look at me

Him : I could sense that your getting worked out about some...wow " he did not finish he was looking at
me

He dropped his mouth , I pulled my hair up to messy bun

Him : now can I get my morning kiss "

Me : only in on one condition…..you put that thing away from you …. " he threw his phone on the bed

He pat a space next to him , I moved to him and within a split seconds he flip me over and we
exchanging spit it was slow ..and soooo good , it felt like heaven ," I love this dress on you " he said
between kiss , so this is how love feels like , I was flouting it like I had no problems no worries in the
world this time right here only belong to us

Him : “ can you believe that we getting married in 2 days from now “

I popped my eyes and buried my face on his chest as he chuckled

not edited shoot me guys i thought i will strike but i just could not stay away ... happy weekend

chapter 34

Sbahle***

I was laughing mess Mvelo is crazy when he likes , we have been locked up in this room for hours now
our stomach was rumbling with hunger we both avoiding the pink elephant in the other room my
brothers are downstairs and Mvelo was afraid of my mom but mostly my brothers , it was not being
afraid per say but I know that he just wanted to avoid them because of respect ,

As much as he paid Lobola for me but I'm still the last born and knowing my brothers they will fuss over
me and make this situation even more awkward then it already is

I rested my head on his chest and he played with my braids , this right here felt so right , have a lot of
hyperactive, sometimes anxious voices in my head pretty much all the time. I knew when I realized that
when we're together the extra voices go silent and I just feel very peaceful and warm. When I look at
him I just feel this really solid feeling — this sort of strong feeling of deep satisfaction with hints of pride
that doesn't feel vulnerable to doubt or speculation — I'd known him for almost three months, we have
spend few days in each other arms and I told him I thought that I was in the process of falling in love
with him, and he just said 'I love you, too just sealed the deal I'm no expect in love but Mvelo and I
connect in a more spiritual level.

making up with him has made me feel some kind of way , the rush my body gets when our body connect
is out of this world

“ I’m not walking out of here alone “

Him : “ I need to helicopter to come and get me from the balcony “

I bust out and laugh

Him " now even your mom is going to look at me funny look how red your cheeks look "

Me : uyaphapha nje "

Him : your nutcase brother will shoot me no doubt "

Me : I wish mom was alone behind those doors "

Him : “ im so hungry right now “

And on queue his stomach grumbled , i untangle my self from his hold

Him : uyaphi "

Me : we need to go eat "_

as his soon to be wife it's my responsibility to feed him , hay don’t look at me like that , I was raised by a
good women and some of her trades rub on to me ,

Me : “ come lets face the music “

He pulled me back to his hold

Me : “ Mvelo … we can hide here forever “

Him : no hle-hle look at the time it's after 9:00 already what they going to think I was doing to you here "

I bust out and laugh , I love how he calls me HLE-HLE , I have realised that I have different nickname for
every mood or occasion with him, ,when he tells me he loves me or boost my self-esteem he calls me
Ndlokulu or Ndlovukazi , when I make him angry I'm Mabhengu and I believe that hle-hle is my
bedroom name , because he calls me that when he looks at me with lustful eyes he looks sexy with semi
opened eyes ,

Me : come let's go eat … “

Him : “ i'm taking you out for breakfast “

I stood up and fixed my dress “ that wasting money you have enough food to feed the village in this
house … “
Him : but is ideal that my my mother in law cook for me ? "

Me : I give up I will go dish up for you me "

Him : and what they going to say ... That making matters worse "

I placed my hands on my waist , all along his eyes were on me , he bit his inner cheek ,

Me : “ I now that look .. not happening … “

He laughed out loud “ haybo ngenzeni ? “

He said with a side smile , Jesus come save me , I squinted my eyes and shook my heart he jumped up
on his feet , I stated moving backwards

Him : you come rocking up in here with this sexy number and you think I will keep my hands to
myself...never ! " I do not trust myself when he speaks like this , I found myself slowly walking away
from him but could not get far as he held my waist

Him : damn you sexy " he whispered , I blushed and looked down it not what he said but the way he
said it that got me feeling some kind of a way , ever since Mvelo came to my life he showers me with
compliments , I knew I'm beautiful but I was never comfortable with my looks that why I hide under
baggy clothes and boyish look and this man came along and made me step out of my shell ,Let’s be real,
words carry so much energy and depending on the love language there are certain things your partner
says that hits you to your core and boost your confidence right now I feel like a million bucks

Me : you know flattery won't get you anywhere ..."

Him: I prefer your lips on mine then you challenging me "

I dropped my mouth open and without invitation he already attacked me , Never in my entire life I have
seen or thought that I’m sexy and to hear him say it I personally think it’s one of the sexiest things any
man can say to women . There is so much certainty and desire in that one phrase. Such a turn on! Jesus
Christ I am turned on , my panty liner is wet , what has this man turn me into , I need to stop locking lips
with him right now I pulled out of his juicy lips slowly ...

Him : mmmm"

I slowly pull away from his hold but he pulled me closer his hands are strong , he started tickling me
when I pulled a face on him , I wiggle out of his hold even had tears on my eyes due to laughter , I ran
towards the door wow I escape , if I stayed any longer in that room I don’t know what would have
happened , Mvelo is so hypnotic and I’m just trapped in his lustful power over me

Him : “ you know that you can never run away from me forever “

Me : I know ..." I shouted back

I started laughing as he ran after me , he caught up with me by the hallway

Me : “ as long as I have legs to run … “

Him : “ I let you win , you can never outrun me ….. one day is one day“

We both laughed ,

The room became silent when we walk in there were seated in dining table , this looks like perfect
picture if only my Father and sister was around,

the looks I got were mixed mom smiled , Nsika looked down he was still sad about me not welcoming
him last night , Mlondi on the other hand wow his so grown up what the fuck is he wearing and blond
hair for real ?
Mvelo : sanibonani "

Only mom and Nsika greeted him back , shit now what

Mom : I made breakfast I hope you don't mind "

Mvelo : not at all Ndlovukazi ... I'm glad you made yourself at home "

Mom : thank you Mtanami ... But please call me "Ma"

Mvelo: yebo Ma "

Mom smiled

Her : Come join us please , "

Mveli : thank you " I held his hand tighter as we walked to the table , breakfast was awkward , mom and
Nsika were talking , Mvelo joined in here and there , Mlondi was just looking at me with folded arms

“ so you decided to lock my sister in the room till this time “

I looked up it was Mlondi ,

Mvelo : “ I’m really sorry I know this may look like I disrespected you Ma but Sbahle was not well “

ma : i understand ..."

Mlondi :”hold up why you apologizing to my mother alone because I'm talking to you !!!"

I felt like rolling my eyes at him , I opened my mouth but his look made me shut it
Mvelo just looked at him and drank his juice , this is going to go side ways this two are arrogant and no
one will bow for another

Mlondi : “kahle ... Kahle what’s your intention with my sister ... “

Mvelo : “ excuse you ? “

Mom : cut it off Mlondi "

Mlondi : I mean It's an arranged marriage there is no love so nje find me I'm lost ....ninzani vele ?"

me : wow !"

Mvelo laughed and wiped his hands "

Mlondi: “ I don’t like repeating myself “

Mveli kissed my cheek

Mlondi : OK Mr let me make this clear to you ... Sbahle is not ready for this sham you call a marriage "

Me : so you decided to crawl out from that rock you were hiding under and gave yourself a role of being
my father , last time check the only parent or family I have is my mother “

Mvelo : “ Sbahle … “ he said softly

Mlondi “ I was not talking to you can't you see that amadoda ayakhuluma “

Me : “ I don’t see no man here than the men sitting next to me , All I see are just boys that ran when the
tough got going!! “
Mom : Sbahle !!!"_

Mlondi : haywena ..." He stood up

Mvelo: I need to make a call " he looked at my mom " thank you ma for breakfast "

Mom smiled

Mlondi : just try to have talk with your brother without fighting "

Nsika : may I have a word with you please " he said to Mvelo , and they walked out

Mlondi : this wedding is off!! "

Mom : INI ?"

Him : the person who arranged this shit is out of the picture now "

Mom : what does that suppose to mean ?"

Me : what ??"

Him : you not marrying that guy "

Me: Mom !!"_

Mom : Mlondi you out of line ...

Him: ' don't tell me you falling for irasta?"

Me : look who's talking you got white boys hair "

Him : haybo are you talking to me ? " he laughed , he was annoyed ... " you going to listen and you going
to make sure uyangizwa yezwa ...

Me : “ I don’t answer to you and I ain't listening to shit you about to sat "

Him : Sbahle I'm warning you!" He pointed a finger at me

My mom started laughing and clapping her hands

Mom : “ I guess some things never change you two still quarrel like monkey's, ooh my God its been a
while since I heard such beautiful noise “ she started crying I rushed to her

Me : “ im sorry mom Please don’t cry “ I engulfed her in a hug

Mlondi : “ look what you did ? “

I looked up “ me ? “

Mom : ooh come on you two this are tears of Joy and stop acting stupid , must I remind you we have a
guest outside “

Me : technically mom we are his guest we are in his house “

Mom : “ ooh shut up “ we bust out and laughed “

Mlondi is so annoying
Mlondi : I don't see a need for this wedding to go on , mom Sbahle is young she supposed to go to
school and leave her life .... That guy is not good for her I know a fuck boy when I see one , we don't
even know his intention "

Me : “ his intention is to marry me , I become a Queen , give him 10 children and leave happily ever
after … happy ?”

Mlondi : “ what the fuck is wrong with you ? “

mom : language mlondi !!!"

Me : “ stop acting like my father !! … you have no right coming into my life and telling me what to do "

Him : “ Ngimdala Sbahle “

Me : “ than act like it … nxa !"

I exited the room , I threw myself on the bed , I hate it when I’m this angry, usually it is because I am too
emotionally tired and so drained of all energy that I just can't even bring myself to cry I find myself doing
Dry crying and it's so horrible I feel numb my body doesn't want to be upset about my brother coming
back or even worse Mlondi trying to tell me what's right or wrong in my life ,

When I saw them few minutes back I so wish I can just run to them and hug them but it's so hard when
I needed them the most there were not there.

Mom : “ is it safe to come in “

Mom asked waving a white napkin

Me : “ mom “

She walked in with plate of food and set next to me

Her : “ what wrong my baby , in thought you will be happy to see your brothers but you have this anger
this hurt inside of you “

Me : “ there were not there for you mom “

Her : “ I did not bring my children to this world to rescuer me “

I shook my head

Her : “ listen hear … So much is changing so quickly in your life I get that , One of the things that is
changing quickly is how deeply you seem to hate another , it’s almost as if you fuel the outraged
thought each time you get mad , I've tried so much not to allow my circumstance affect you but looks
like i failed miserable , I'm trying so hard to reprimand you but well it’s just wearying. Sometimes it feels
like the outrage just waits to jump on whatever issue at hand , It’s a parasite looking for the next animal
to suck dry.

So what’s going on? How did you end up this way?

Was it me ?

And is there anything that you and I can do about it?

Me : “ I’m just mad maka Sibahle “

Her : i understand but you need to cry it out , scream but mostly just let it go , we can not hold things
that happened in the past , everything that happened sweetheart was made to shape us to be the
women we are today ,forgive your brothers there are more of victims as you are to the mess created by
me and your father , if you want to be angry be angry at me “

I looked at her with glassy eyes no matter how I want to cry right now I know for fact that tears will not
come out ,
Her : “ one of my son came back in chair and the other I can not recognised at all , they grew up the hard
way maybe even worse than us but today they came back all we can do is thank God that there are alive
…“

She pulled me for a hug and brushed my back , it hurts too much to cry, I think everyone has a point
where tears are harder than the problem that's causing them , yes I missed my brothers but still feel a
tingle of hate and anger towards them

Her : It is time to move on and shed away the layer of your life that is making you upset. Fix the issue or
just find something to make you better! Sometimes you just don't have enough power to cry because of
anger , it doesn't mean that you are not being hurt by this situation. You don't have to cry with your
eyes to count it as a real cry, sometimes it hurts so bad that you can't even put it out in tears so do what
your father taught you "

Me : I have never touched a sketch book since I was 12...since that day ...."

Her : I know , but your father taught you art for a reason , out of all his children you the one that took
after him "

Mlondi walked in without knocking , this guy really is he even one of my mother children I frowned

Him : there is black guy that talks like a white man requesting to speak to you "

Mom : ooh it must be Sbahle in-laws , " she kissed my cheek and rushed out

I was not in a mood for Mlondi but did he move no , he just stood there and looked at me

Him : Ntombi kayise " I looked at him only my father user to call me like that ,

" I'm not leaving this room till you forgive me ....but let me start by saying I'm sorry ..."
I looked down and played with my hands our of my siblings me and Mlondi we were always close he was
more of my best friend

Me : I 'm not sure I like you, brother of mine, I want to say I miss you and I understand. But I am sorry
You have affected me so deeply, probably more than I know. For a long time I have wanted to scream, "I
hate you!" Most probably beat you up .. But until now I have never wanted to say yes I forgive you I
think it is because feelings of rage, self-pity and disappointment covered my latent sadness like a heavy
blanket"

He kneeled in front of me

Him : ngiyaxolisa ...Ngcolosi!

Wena wakwaDlabazane

KwaNephu KwaLamula

Nyawo zigezwa ngamazolo

Ninenivuka nixubhe ngelala

Shongololo!

Ngabe siyakudla sesabimilenzelenze

Nyawo zeshongololo kaziphumuli

Sigampu!

Ngwane Ingwani ngwadi

Abayibone ngesongukuthiiwelile

Jali! Ninenilala nomunwe

Nivuke nikhwifilanga

Mmemezi kaHlangabeza

. to be continued

I'm sorry to post so late I have flue zihlobozami , I couldn't even edit ... please forgive me

chapter 35

**** not edited at all ****

Mvelo

When Nsika asked to speak with me I was I bit nervous I guess it because he is Sbahle big brother and
I’m having a talk with him for the first time , Walking outside with him I had lot of mixed emotions I did
know what to expect his older then me and I don’t know what he is thinking about this whole
arrangement of me and Sbahle getting married.

I swear to God if he gives me that bull shit that this wedding is not happening I will go crazy on him ,
you know the way Mlondi acted back in the house it made me regret being a mediator to this family ,
but honestly speaking I did what I did for my Queen and her mother and I just had enough of that Pig
thinking that he has an upper hand over my .women
The last thing I ever want to see is Sbahle upset , crying or angry , she tough cookie no doubt but I like
how she just becomes vulnerable with me, God is my whiteness that I have fallen hard for Sbahle and I
plan to marry her she is everything I need in a women , she strong , outspoken , not easily intimidated ,
she believes in culture and ancestors , she is like my soul mate just scratch that she is my soulmate ,I
find that when I speak to her ,she finishes my sentences and when I’m thinking of something she can
just easily pick it up before I utter the words out, we can be miles away from each other but she can
still sense when I’m happy , not feeling well , angry she not that much of talker since she lives in her
head most of the time but she has given me the excess to her inner thoughts and to be honest she one
crazy women fuck I love her.

You know growing up I used to think that statement like “ you just know when you found the one that
she the one “ did not exist or was not true , I mean There is no way you can just KNOW as soon as you
meet someone! You don't know anything about them! Fate isn't real!" so I thought but little did I know
that God has created someone out there for me and we going to meet in the most strangest way
possible , who would have thought that I will fall in love with a girl I’m arranged to marry , to me I
agreed to this to make alliances with other kingdoms but it turned out that our love was already written
in the stars long before I was even born.

Before Sbahle I dated other people. Most of them, honestly were terrible and I used to tap and go , to
be honest my track record with women is fucked up , Many of them were just to clingy and had to may
expectation of me or the relationship, I thought I loved some of these people Maybe, in some way, I did
. But somehow I still never felt fulfilled by it, It was never enough, It felt like forced love, although I
knew none of them were "the one," I'd lie to myself and to other people just to make my life seem more
perfect than it was.

Nsika : I'm sorry about how my brother acted back there "

Nsika pulled me back to reality with him talking

Me : its OK ... I'm used to his kind if crazy "

He side smile
Him : I will like to thank you for what you did to my family I ow you my life "

Me :don't sweat it bro"

He looked down

Him : mom tells me that you and Sbahle have become very close "

I ran my hands on my head OK how do I answer that

Him : so you really serious about marrying my crazy sister "

Me : “ aish yah , she a hothead no doubt but that one of the things I love about her “

He looked at me as I set opposite him

Him : “ you love my sister “

That a stupid question to ask , but he's my in-law his the oldest brother and technically he carries the
title of the head of the family ,

Me : “ I do … “

Him : “ pardon me if I’m speaking out of team but this marriage was arranged right ? “

Me : “ yes it was and I took time to know Sibahle personally , and she wise women and will make an
exceptional Queen , I have lot to deal with on my side so I need a person I can really on when I’m away
on business and that can handle the Kingdom and my other businesses “

Him : “ she still young for such responsibility “

Me : “ I’m 22 years old and I’m a king , have international and local businesses to run , I have a child , a
family and whole village to take care off …. I’m royalty and sometimes growing up fast is the only option
to keep your head above the water for people like us …. “

He nodded and looked down , there is something about this guy that looks dark and sad , he curries to
much blame and self guilt

Him : “ how do you do it ? “

I looked at him

Him : “ be on top of your game …. I mean I knew from the day I was born that my life will be
complicated , I have this huge responsibility to carry my fathers name when he died I was not ready for
such I coward away and by doing that a lot of things fall apart “

Me : don't beat yourself about this bro we had to start somewhere to be the man we meant to be in the
future like looking back in my life it was never easy , I grew up not knowing who I was till I was 17th my
father protected me from my family , he practically went on suicide mission saving me and my sister
from the enemies we call family , so I vowed that I will never be like him and take an easy route out … it
was never easy , and I know it still going to get more complicated by time goes but I got good support
structure that will help me and mentor me to be the best I can be “

He nodded " easier said than done , I don't think I'm ready to fill my fathers shoes , I mean I failed my
family once I'm just afraid that it might happen again " he said looking Down

Me : “look at it this way Many people grow up thinking they want to be like someone else. Whether we
are trying to follow the footsteps of our father, or in my case grandfather or some other person we want
to be like. The shoes we long to fill seem unattainable and never the right size or fit.

Yet we spend much of our lives trying to fill the shoes of others before us.
We spend our childhood looking up to others especially a person we see as role model a leader. Hoping
to be like them, we change who we were born to be. Sometimes we spend such an effort to be like
someone else we begin to forget who we really are ... “

Him : “ I just don’t know where to start “

Me : “ you can start by taking ownership … you the Bhengu Prince next in line to be your father
successor if you uncle was a noble man he was suppose to temporally rule till you are old enough for
take over … so since his out of the picture the house need a head “

He looked at himself , Anybody can tell that Nsika is going trough a lot his most likely depressed and
the feelings of guilt and self-blame is so overwhelming. His actually feeding into self-blame excessively
and inappropriately and this right here is a main key factor in depression his just sad

Me : “ have you ever try talking to someone ? “

He shook his head

Me : “ you should … leading is not on in ones legs or ability to walk it's in your head , courage and
strength , Sbahle told me that you are the brightest … quietest in the family … that tells me that you
wise and your have a hungry brain , use that as your straight to change things around here “

He nodded and smiled ,

Me : just remember that this is your birthright never allow no one to take it from you , its you legacy .."'

he offered me his hand for shake

Him : “ you a good men Mguni and I’m proud to call you my brother in law … “

Me : “ Thank you Bhengu “

Him : “ can you set up a meeting with neighbouring royal house ? “

I laughed

Me : “ I will be honoured …”

Nsika is not that bad , his quite reserved but deep down his good guy ,

We were called By Sbahle mom to come inside when we walked back inside the house I found my Uncle
seated down ,

Me : “ is everything ok ? “

Mzamo : “ yes … please take a sit “

it was me , Nsika , Sbahle mom and my uncle

Mzamo " as you know that the wedding is in three days time ,

Me :I'm sorry to cut you off but its actually two days from now … “

Sba/mom : “ ooh my God I almost forgot …a lot has been happening with my family oh my I even forgot
my daughter's wedding “

Mzamo : “ relax Queen mother all preparation are done just few touch up’s but the day will be
spectacular “

She breath out loud and we chuckled

Mzamo : we are not backwards in culture like most royal houses , so My mother , indlovukazi has sent a
special invitation to your family and I decided to personally deliver it myself to you “

Ok what happening I was never informed about some special invitation , I looked at the invitation card
as Maka Sbahle read through it

Her : “ ooh my God as in tomorrow “

He handed the card to Nsika , he looked at it and nodded , ok what the fuck is happening ?

Mzamo : The Mnguni family would like to have family dinner just so that will get to know our in-laws "

I looked at him what is my Uncle playing here I thought will only meet on the wedding day

Sbahle Mom : “ ooh my God i will be delighted … thank you so much “

Mzamo : thank you for accepting our offer … I will let Queen mother know thank you “

He stood up “ well that all I have to say for now , looking forward to seeing you tomorrow … Mvelo
My I have word … “

He said his goodbye and I walked him out

Him : “ what did Sbu tell you about the younger brother ? “ he asked as we stopped next to his car

I shoved my hands on my pocket and looked at him ,” .nothing much but just that he was gang leader in
Qwaqwa , did heist , gun smuggling … the works "

Him: “ remember when I told you that Bhengu is sloppy with his money and his shady business ? “
I nodded because I looked at his file and it was too easy to find incriminating evidence against him

Him : “so I had to dig, it was to obvious as If it was planted "

I nodded " I had that feeling as well , so what did you found out "

Him : what if I told you that , human traffic , drug smuggling , illegal brothel it was planted on Uncle
piglet.... The only thing we can pin on him is money laundry and animal poaching

Me : “ what ? But everything points to him .."

Him : he had lot of enemies but who will have motive to destroy him slowly without him knowing "

Me : shit ....Mlondi"

He pointed with his head I looked up Mlondi was standing on balcony hugging Sbahle and he was
looking straight at us ... No wait at me in fact

Mzamo : “ the culprit himself "

To be continued

I'm still under the weather , sorry for late inset

chapter 36
.

unedited

Sbahle ***

Mlondi did say his peace and apologized it was really hard for him to say sorry especially since I'm
younger than him, he still does not see anything wrong in his action when he stayed in hiding for so
many years or what he said to me downstairs or the way he spoke to Mvelo

I was also tired in going back and forth with him , my brother is the most complicated , arrogant ,
messed up duschbad I have ever seen , in short nje his just an ass

Him : I'm still not feeling your apology "

Ooh did I mention that he demanded an apology from me as well for not respecting him earlier

Me : can we shake on it "

Him : what are we 50 years when did we start shaking hands "

Good lord his personality is on steroids right now and I'm just drained by this whole thing we have been
doing , he hugged me so tight that I felt my rib braking

Me : get off me you , you're squishing me "

Him : I missed you ... You know talking to Thandi is not the same as talking to you "

I pushed him off , my angry levels just went from 20 to 100

Me : what ...you spoke to Thandi ?"

Him : well ya she gave us money for rent for few months till we were on our feet after the shooting "

Me :wow ..." I stepped away from him I felt betrayed again .

Not to long ago me and my siblings played together, ate at the same table and slept under one roof,
close as pages in a book -- or at least that's how you remember it. So yes we drifted apart due to
unforeseen circumstances, when they finally decided to come back they tell me that there still talked
and offers assistance to one another and I had to ask myself did they even think about me ? cared
enough to bother themselves about how me there younger sister I'm doing ?

I looked at the grown man standing before me and I don't recognise him ,
I'm tongue tight right now 6 Years apart has made him a stranger to me i have little to say to him,
without noticing but definitely I have drifted apart from him , the old loyalties are no longer there , So
what happened?

I look at him talking trying to justify his statement but I'm just not understanding why they failed to
reach out to me , was I No longer considered as there siblings ? Or maybe they blamed me for my
father's death I know I'm being paranoid right now and the voices are to much in my head the truth is
I’m hurt , I know that only about one-third of siblings remain very close into their adulthood life’s while
the Another third remain relatively close but soon drift apart, sometimes describing their relationship
as distant or rivalries I know that me and sister have that relationship but never thought she will turn my
brothers against me as well .

Him : what ... I told you what happened to us , who were we supposed to turn too ?... Mom ?.... "

Me : she had every right to know that you guys were o'right "

Him : oh come on Sbahle she was sleeping with the very same men who put my brother on wheelchair
!!"

I'm not sure what sting the most is hearing him say ' my brother ' or the fact that he doesn't seam to
care what happened to me and mom in that house

Me : just get out!!!"

Him : I'm not leaving this room till we talk this through , you boiling everything inside and you busy
blaming me for something I had no control over … come on Sbahle Grow up !!!" I just found out that I
have little in common with Mlondi , his too self centered and inconsiderate ,I'm trying by all means to
understand him but this conversation is going down hill now , I feel like strangling him his just
deliberately pushing my buttons the wrong way without knowing why or how I’m this angry with him.

I shook my head and stepped out of the balcony I was mad I was angry , yet again I felt like I was
sidelined by my siblings ,

Him : look Sbahle I'm sorry ..."

Me : no you not , in that twisted head of yours you think we had the perfect life with the very same men
that killed my father , my mom went through the worse while you and your sister lived a carefree life
away from us or from home ! what I hate the most is that the men that I love went out of his way to try
and reunite me with my siblings but it was little too late you have that reunion .

You have change gradually over the years due to life experiences and the people you were mixing with ,
I thought or had hope that it will be easier to speaking but the years apart has made us drifted apart
our priorities are not the same in your mind you wish we can fall back into default childhood roles when
you have to tell me you my big brother and you right and I’m wrong … I must do as you say as you wish
because ' it's best for me ' I'm not that same girl anymore Mlondi , life taught me to fight , to stand my
ground and to protect my mother by all means , I may not wear the pants in the family but trust me I did
for the past years fighting battles that were way above my league and guess what I worn … I don’t really
need you in my life and worse decision I made was to asked to be reunited with you

Him : Sbahle .. " it came out as whisper I saw Mvelo speaking to his Uncle by the driveway , God knows
how grateful I am to have that man in my life

Mlondi : you choosing an outsider instead of your own family "

I wanted to nod so badly , the smile on my face was evidence that his the only human being that gets
me

Me : we might have got on okay when we were young the only real link is the fact that we grew up
together and emotionally and psychologically that was the only common link , right now I'm perceived
to be shaping my life , my mothers life to hell with this family you can continue

To play the martyr or the bossy older brother role ...And of course, as many a fairytale has highlighted,
siblings can be ruthlessly selfish "

Him : I'm sorry ...you feel that way about me ... But I'm willing to do whatever it takes to gain your trust
you my little sister and I feel like I failed you , I don't know this women standing before me , she strong ,
headstrong, fiers and has got all her ducks in a row , all I'm trying to say is that if space you need that I'll
give you .. I'm sorry I was not there to protect you from life and I can see that someone has replaced me
" I felt defeated I was weary , he hugged me it wasn't warm as i wanted it to be but well it is what it is ,
right now I wish I was alone .

" I would like to be alone please "

I said to him and walked back inside the room he stood there for few minutes looking at Mvelo and his
Uncle if don’t like that look but I’m too drained to reprimand him , after few seconds he just turned and
walk away without saying anything

I finally breath out loud , Do I hate my brother ? No I don't... Do I forgive then I don't know .. All I feel is
just being drained and tired with this whole situation , I just thought I was done with being angry , I
mean for a person that has been stuck in that angry bubble I finally thought I was free , I

spent a lot of time in my life being angry. At one point I hated everything and almost everyone , even
found myself saying that “God, I hate people ” I hated the people in school , shops , play ground , in my
community and mostly in my family I just didn't want to associate myself with them

I hated my life funny I used to love my life so much but it all just became grey and dull,
I can’t recall when the precise moment was that it began, this disgust of the world around me, I do
know what I was disgusted by, the mindless selfishness of others...the hush treatment in my house
....detachment from my siblings ...the death of my father. ...or the fact that i watched my mother get
abused in front of me .

. I was in total frustration of the way everyone seemed to be wearing blinders to the world around them
especially my world , I heard silent screamed inside of me and alI needed was to be heard ,

Mvelo came to my life when I felt I was about to self destruct ,

" Anger is armour — we go to it quickly to protect ourselves from other vulnerable feelings you might
feel afraid or hurt first, but anger, a secondary emotion, will surface quickly. Stopping to ask yourselves
what is under the anger your primary emotion is another way to slow down and move from the fight-or-
flight reaction to your reasoning part of the brain.” Mvelo said that to me he took his time to study me
and get under my skin , he will video call me and will have silent conversation with our eyes ... He was
patient and took his time to gain my trust and love . I won't say I'm fully there yet where my emotions
are in check but I will say that I'm not a slave or prisoner of my emotional distraction , I take few breath
exercise to calm myself down , I walk away from toxic situations or people I so wish that I could self
drown right now but I found my eyelids getting heavy ,

I was about to take a nap when I my phone vibrated , I opened my one eye it was a text from Mvelo
asking me to meet him in his car , I jumped off the bed and walked out mom was in n the kitchen
cooking , she has made herself overly comfortable in this house , aish I need to ask hubby if she can stay
here for a while till the dust settles down ka Bhengu.

I looked around and noticed that my brothers were not in sight , once I was outside I saw Mvelo inside
his car with his phone in his hands , I jumped in and he placed his phone aside and looked into my eyes

Him : “ hi ! “

I pouted Mvelo is always on his phone and when he see me he will put it away , should I be worried ?

Him : ngibulala bani ( who am i killing )

Ooh my eyes must be red and puffy ,

Me : I just had a talk with Mlondi "

He held my hand

Him : ooh how did it go? “

Me : it went bad .... "

Him : want to talk about it ?"

I shook my head " I think my sister hates me ... " I faked a smile

He brushed my cheek

Him : hay the Chinese did not build the wall in one day so take it one day at at time OK ..." Mvelo touch
just makes Me feel better all the time its

Me : “ and you and Nsika ? “

Him : “ we had a good talk … “ I looked at him waiting for him to elaborate but he jut started brushing
my cheek with his thumbs giving me

a feeling I can't explain adequately. I try to talk myself through it and even stumble through my
thoughts. There is complete trust and openness which is scary in and of itself when you've always dealt
with manipulative assholes . There is side-splitting, tear-inducing, borderline maniacal laughter that he
brings out of me , There is security and safety. There is pure joy, even when one of us has a bad day right
now I feel like I did not have a heated conversation with my brother few minutes back

Him : so my grandmother has decided to invite you and your family for dinner in my house tomorrow
night "

Me : what ? why ? “

He laughed this what I like me seating his Dimple's when he chortles

Him : I don’t know something to do with family meeting before the big day “

Me : “ I’m not ready for that “

Him : ... Well your mother agreed I'm not sure about your nut case brother , but Nsika is game "

Me : ooh my God … its too soon “

Him : we getting married in two days time … “

I know , no need to remind me “ you forget that I’m comfortable being with you … not your family “

Him : you look cute when you panicking “ ooh brother this man finds this funny ,

I took my phone and texted Diddy

Him : and than ? "

Me : I'm taking my crazy cousin along ...you said we having family dinner right I will need a destruction "

He just laughed , his phone beeped , and he looked at it his face changed

He kissed my hand and side smile

Him : I need to deal with something in Durban … I should be on my way “

I hate goodbye it like when he leaves he takes a part of me with him , I had asked him about staying a
little longer in his house , he agree his phone was annoying the shit out of me

Him : I trust you will behave and try Talking to Nsika "
I nodded as he came close and kissed me , his phone vibrated and suddenly I was not feeling this kiss

Him : what ? "

I looked at him

Him : say it " he balanced his head on his hand with few centimetres from my face ,

Him : Mabhengu khuluma!"

My heart skip a bit , he hates it when I don't talk , his phone vibrated again this time around I pushed
him off me

" your phone is so annoying , " I found myself saying wait did I just shout at him

Him : what ?

Ooh God we not even married yet and already I’m detecting his life , I felt so embarrassed after saying
that I found myself looking down his quite I looked at him and he had a mother of all smirks , he chew
his inner cheek … God not this look , his making me nervous , I quickly pac his lip and I quickly jump off
leaving him shaking his head

He started his car “ two days left will see how far your legs will get you , you can not run from me
forever

To be continued

chapter 37

Mvelo ***

After driving from Sbahle home town I drove straight to Durban.

Sli has been texting me and left me voice notes about me rubbing salt in her wound by sending her my
wedding invitation card ... I'm not a wedding planner and that stunt is written Pam all over , I wonder
when she will accept that Sli is the mother of my child and she like it or not she forever going to be in
our life... But that dies not make it right for Sli to flood my inbox ... I should have a talk about this with
her , I can't believe that Sbahle just picked up that it was another women texting me , yoo that soon to
be be wife of mine has another six sense.

" I'm already home when you getting here " it was a massage from Pam

I attempted to call her but she did not answer ,

This days Pam condition is getting worse and honestly I'm scared , when ever I talk to her or think about
her I get this sharp pain in my heart .

But besides this pain , I have been having this unsettling feeling as well like something bad going to
happen , its this never ending worrying or sad feeling that comes from time to time.

I had to see and consult with Makhumalo about this I had this feeling that something was wrong as
much as I have calling I can not see visions concerning me directly but my gut feeling will alarm me
when something is about to go wrong in my life,

Running a royal house is no child's play and my guard need to be on alert at all the time , I walk around
with bodyguards I have learned to use a gun for defence but mostly I have to follow my lion instinct...

My status has created a lot of enemies for me , Every thing just happened over night and I find it hard
to trust anyone easily ...

As any other royal house there must be a royal traditional healer that will foresee events that affect the
royal house , but not all news must be bad some can be about a bright future ahead I did not see no one
else fit for the job as one and only Makhumalo , I trust mama with my life

it took a lot of convincing from my ancestors side and on her side , but I left her with no choice till she
finally agreed she went through a massive training in the mountain with only her and my ancestors , I
fears for her life because " idlozi lengonyama " is powerful more than' lenyoka yasemanzini ' but she
came out victories .

" good you here I was expecting you "

Transformation has made her like this she is so direct , without wasting any time she lead the way to the
ancestral room

Her : Nkosi yami someone is playing with fire LA "

Me : makhosi "

Her : there are dark Sky's approaching , I see blood ....death.....grief ..."

Me : makhosi "

Her : the blood moon is approaching "

Me : Makhosi "

Her : abaphansi they will give life and take life. ..harvest season is here"

I looked at her and stop clapping

Her: destiny was not fulfilled ... Intombazane uzilethele amashwa..."

Me : ....

Her : nkosi yami I see grief in your house ...

Me : how can we stop it "

Her : you need to be strong , the family will need you ... You the head .. Indlondlo ... The great white
lion.... Mnguni "

She looked at me and the yellow candle fell down....

Her : I see rupture of darkness attacking the royal house .... He has set a trap ... Whatever happens do
not let Ndlovukazi to leave the Ngonyama kingdom ... I see chaos .. Umsindo ... Isililo .....fight ....there is
a man who uses dark magic ... He is busy as we speak ... We need to go .. Kuyaphuthuma "

She was saying everything all at once after throwing down the bones It was too much to take in and very
confusing

Me : mama I'm not following "

She look up

" it has started ... I need to go the royal house , kumele uqiniswe umuzi kunobutha obuzayo "

Me : we can leave today "

She started doing growling sounds I was clapping and saying my clan name... Till she finally came back
from her trans

.
Sbahle ***

I helped mom with cooking , I haven't spoken to Nsika I was scared I spoke

Inappropriately this morning with him and I kinda regret it , I'm not big in apologizing so I decided to
cook his favorite meal , I hope it still is his favorite meal, dumplings and beef curry it's the thought that
counts right and maybe we can have light conversation of supper

Me: mom how is Nsika ?" I was fishing

Her :his .... "

I looked at her but she just wiped her tear on her eyes

Her : why don't you ask him yourself maybe he might talk to you ... "

I nodded Nsika is not that much of a talker and I have a feeling that whatever he went through he did
not just only lose his legs but a whole lot more

Her : sbahle " I looked at her

Her : I see you and Mvelo have become close "

I nodded

Her : so you in relationship with him "

Me : he just thought that it will best to know each other prior before we tie the knot"
Her : do you still want to marry him ...even after the person who arranged this is not in our lives any
more "

Me : we talked about it and yes i will marry him are Union will be good for both families"_

Her : so how is he like ?"

I smiled and looked down " his a good person "

Her : Sibahle Ntombikayise Bhengu do you love this boy ?" Ooh god did she have to call me by my full
names just to get an answer ,

I nodded and looked at her and she smiled ,

Her : come sit down I think we need to talk "

I was hesitant I mean I never had ' the talk' before with Mom I was not even sure if I was ready for this

Her : so useke wasondela esibanyeni sababa wakho "

Me : No ma ... We have not gone that far "

Her : mmmmmm so what do you do when you with him "

Me : maka Sbahle ... We just talk "

Her: mmmm so you have kissed him? "

I don't want to answer this questions any more what am i 15 years or something
Me : kodwa ma .. Why so many questions "

Her : I saw you and him in the car being all touchy and and kissy , "

Yooo tixo ... I dropped my mouth open

Her : so my girl this is what you going to do.... When you experience that your body betray you when
you with him...tell him you saving your self for marriage "

Me : he respect me maka 'Sbahle , he believes in sex after marriage as well "

Mom : are you ready for that? "

OK mom's question are crazy who's ever ready to be deflowered I shook my head

Her : good ... That means you ready "

Me : mom I said I'm not ready "

Her : do you trust Mvelo, do like love him ...? Do you believe he will never hurt you internationally ?"

Me : yes !"

Her : that trust him enough to ...make you a women " She did a head shake and I laughed , if she finds its
hard to to talk to me about this than what was the point of seating me down.

I held my face my fears came rushing in

I never had many positive associations with sex not that I had sex by my best friend Zim was bitch and
change all size and shapes in a her vj-whole and she will come tell me all about it . I always heard sex
would defile me, give me diseases or get me pregnant. I heard about the temptations of sexual
relationships and how they would ruin my life if I got involved. This talks were meant to encourage me
to wait until marriage to have a healthy sex life but instead, it directly connected sex to shame, no
matter the circumstances. I began to believe that there was never a time or place to show my
sexuality...till Mvelo came along and he has made my body react in another way , am I ready for my
wedding night No ...

" I'm scared mom "

We heard the TV playing ooh it must be Nsika

Her : will talk about this later I have two full days to prepare myself for the talk " .. I bust out and laugh

Mlondi ***

I looked at my pocket of cigarette and kept playing with them , this is one habit i can not stop I have
learned to keep my hands mouth busy to prevent myself from smoking

My phone ringed and I picked it up

" when you coming home "

Me : I am home "

Nsika : you know what I mean ..."

I breath out loud

Him: killing him won't get my legs back or bring back your childhood "

Me : who said I haven't killed him "

Him : I know you ... You don't kill but you play games with people's minds , and when they think their
mad and losing their head that when you strike "

Me : Sbahle hates us " I decided to change the subject , I don't like it when Nsika involves himself in my
line of work

Him : I don't think so ... I believe she is just grown up "

Me : I hate that boy ...did you see how he looked at me he will not have the last dance "

He bust out and laughed

Him : I know ... Its because you two are more alike than you think ... "

I still think that this Mvelo gut is not good for my sister , I understand if there were dating fuck now he
wants to marry my little sister , bullshit! , sbahle suppose to go to university and be her own person not
someone wife

Him : look bro ... If the two family join forces we will rule with peace... "

Me : what ...you thinking of taking the seat "

Him : its long overdue ...look I have to go ....and think about what I said ... He's not worth it ..."
Me : what ever "

Sunny walked towards me

Him : all done "

Me : great ... " I stood up and made my way to the grave yard , I left my uncle chained to my father
grave told him to apologize to him the whole and confess on why he killed him he was chained there the
whole night

So today I have set up a meeting with him it will not be fair if singakhuluni njengamadoda

I have set and outdoor setting in the middle of our family burial ground

there was a table set with my uncle cheep whisky and my two cans of play energy drink

I asked sunny to untie him so he may join me for a drink.

This place has really messed up with his head he was busy looking around I could tell he was seeing
ghost or his demons.

Me : sorry I'm late ... Aish was reuniting with my family you know how good it felt I wish you were there
to whiteness it yooo its so good tell the people I love that I love them, yoooo you could have seen mom
tears of jot hugging me it was just a beautiful moment if i could show you i could yazi but you can tell
because The love within me shines throughout angithi ?

I was even beyond blessed to see my sister as well ... Wow she is all grow up leading by example and is
expressive beyond limits I bet she gave you a hard time .... "

Him : .....
Me : so how was your night ? ...and the talk you had with my father ...? "

Him : you sick !"

Me : I know .... Do you want something to drink so we can talk "

He looked around his eyes popped out as if he seeing someone yep Hus paranoid just how I like my
meat

Me : aish the sun is setting so beautifully ... You know why I chose to have this meeting here ?"

Him : please get me outta here ... He is coming back he always come at night "

Me : mmmm now I know why you decided to build your own house you see him right .... You couldn't
fuck his wife in his house in his bed right .... You sick bustad you "

He nodded and I bust out and laughed

Me : ncoooo poor you , "

Him : please Mlondi . . ngiyakucela my son I will confess I will tell you everything just get me out of here

I took my can of play and opened it I crossed my legs and looked around

Me : you know why i love this place because it tells us we will all drop dead one day, no matter our
titles, status, identity or level of importance. We are all mortal human beings. Human beings whom
every day get a chance at life and love

Some in the most excruciating circumstances and others who seem to have it all."
He looked at me with gushing tears

Me : So Sikhumbuzo Bhengu tell me this because I fail to understand why were toy never conscious of
your mortality or be grateful of what you had or better yet let's talk about this hate you have or had for
your brother. ... My father "

Him ....

Me : its getting darker ndoda asikhulume. .. "

To be continued

not edited .... can't keep my eyes open medication ...

chapter 38

.unedited

Sbahle ***

I heard noise like waves or water fall , I heard humming of beautiful melody calming and soothing , I rose
from my bed , i was wearing a long silky white night dress I was walking on barefoot I followed the
sound I opened my bedroom door it lead me to place I have never seen before it was beautiful , it
looked like enchanted garden , the river was big and powerful I looked closely and I saw a massive
waterfall feeding into the this river , it was so clear and blue in colour there,

In the middle of the river set a big rock

And I saw female figure she was seating on the rock brushing her hair

Me : “ hello “

She did not respond

Me : “ who are you ? “

She did not respond , I walk closer to her , her back was facing me she slowly turned around she was
beautiful , her Melanie skin glow in the sun , her eye colour was changing with reflection of her
environment , I have seen this face before , but where?

Her : “ sawbona “

Me : “ yebo …. Where am ? “

Her : “ you in the royal house … your royal house “

Me : “ who are you …”

She smiled as the the sky change from blue to dark black

Her : “Sometimes life isn’t all rainbows and sunshine ,Throughout every person’s life, there will be hard
times where it’s forecasted to be dark and gloomy, with seemingly constant showers. And when it rains,
it pours.

It is important to use these difficult times as life lessons, growing and shaping you to blossom into a
stronger and wiser person every day!

Me : “ I don’t understand “
Her : “ you soon to be QUEEN you are young but you chosen for a purpose... “

I look down , I have so many self doubt about this title of being queen , what if I’m not good enough
what if I fail....I haven't even been schooled about this position .

Her : never doubt yourself ... This thing is in your blood , its your birthright ... But there is no time then
the now ....start now to believe in yourself , start where you are , start with fear , start with pain , start
with doubt , start with voice trembling but start empowering you and believing that you are chosen for
purpose , just start and don’t stop start where you are with what you have “

She placed a hand on my chest , I felt this worm feeling ,

" starting as of today your heart , soul and blood of the Mnguni family "

I smiled and nodes

I was confused though I did not understand , but I could tell that she is indirectly telling me to stay
strong, to stay focus on what to come

Her : “all ways remember that you are The chosen one , before you became his lover , wife , friend …
.you must never forget that you were born to rule to lead to be Queen … “

I nodded and on queue the rain kissed my skin , it was cold and hard , it beat upon my head with silver
liquid drops she sang her song that was somehow in tune with the raindrops

Her : Do not be angry with the rain, it simply does not know how to fall upwards when it rains it pours
but after dark Sky's come a rainbow “she dived in the river ,

Me : “.. who are you ? …. “ like siren she left her song ringing in my ear , ran after her I saw I yellow and
white reflection of beautiful snake under the water... I held my chest
Me : “ Ndlovukazi ... Mnguni Queen mother … “ I bowed my head as sign of respect and I was woke up
to vibrating sound under my pillow

Me : “ hello “

“ ooh did I wake you ? “

I set up straight Mvelo is such an early bird is after 7am and he already waking me up and sounding
fresh

Me : “ its OK I’m up now “

Him : “ again I’m sorry , how did you sleep “

Me : “ I slept good thank you and you ? “

Him : “ only had few hours of sleep … but I’m good “

Me : “ is everything ok … “

He kept quite something is definitely wrong ,

Him : “ I'm still not sure what it is but I'm working overtime in getting to the bottom of it"

I felt something like liquid on my nose , when I wiped it I saw blood , I stood up and ran to bathroom

Him : Sbahle ... Sbahle "

I had already blocked my nose with a cloth

Me : mmmm"

Him : I heard you sniffing , are you OK ? "

Me : aaah ... Yes ..."

He dropped the call and I ran to tap to wash this blood and I expected he was video calling me ... What
now ,

I picked up

Him : is that blood ???"

I nodded

Him : when did it start "

Me : right now "

Him : ma Bhengu ! "

Me : I swear I just woke up and it started .."

He looked down as if his thinking when he lifted his head

Him : i woke up with bleeding nose as well thought I should check up on you and see how you doing ...
And now this ? "
It was more of question then a statement I held my mouth

Him : “ don’t worry about me I'm fine …we going to be just fine ..."

Me : you hiding something from me I can see it in your eyes ... "

Him : so how is you day planned today ? “

Me : Mvelo !!!"

He raised his eyebrow

Me : uxolo ... But tell me What's going on ..."

Him : remove that cloth let me see if its still bleeding "

I wiped my nose and it looks like it has stopped

Him : sithandwa sami I want you to go pamper yourself take Dudu and the other mean one out , let me
go check on what going on with preparation for tonight " I want to strangle him right now why is he
avoiding my question and why is he talking about Nwabisa

Him : don't pull that face on me ..."

I looked down , why must he be be so intimidating

Me : “ I haven't seen Nwabisa since that day. ... “

Him : “ she your cousin and was bad influenced by her mother , she was porn in her evil game , don’t
you think you blaming the wrong person ? The least you could do is check up on her “
I huffed

Him : “ look holding a grudge will only fuel her up and she will end up feeding into her evil heat , I just
don’t want you having unnecessary enemies “

I roll my eyes , he laughed

Him : “any way stop rolling your eyes at me .. . “

I laughed

Him: “ I miss you “

I blushed “ I miss you too “

Him : “ I can't Wait to see you tonight “

I smiled “ me too “

I wanted to tell him about the dream but I somehow find my self opening up my mouth and closing it ,
.... Could this be the dark sky that Mvelo,'s Gran told me about ? Him keeping staff from me .... What is
he hiding vele ? he looked behind him and back at me

Him : “ look chubby cheeks I need to go … open the side drawer I left something for you “

I rushed to the drawer there was box I quickly opened it “ Jesus Christ ! “

Him : “ why you calling another mans name women !! ... Say Mvelo Mnguni “ I bust out and laughed
Me : “ for me ? “

Him : “ last time I check that card has your name on it … so go spoil yourself … I love you “

Me : “ I love youuuuuuu”

He laughed I dropped the call and jumped up and down , i have never own a black card before and now
I have a platinum card

I jumped to the shower took a quick shower , ran to my closet and jumped into my short denim skirt and
white vest with all start finished up with lip gloss ,

I walked to the kitchen to make breakfast but Mom has already beat me to it , she left a note on the
table

“morning kids I’m out for the morning , I have to attend a prayer meeting will see you later , help
yourself to breakfast

NB: BE GOOD PLEASE”

I checked outside the window to check if she left her car and yes she did I took my plate and set on the
couch

“ you up early kwenzenjani “

Mlondi said walking in stretching his body, i still think this hairstyle looks ridiculous on him but funny
enough he looks hot
Me : “ its beautiful day … “ he set next to me and took piece of my bacon

Its good to say that me any my brothers have called it truce , mom had a heated talk with us over
dinner and well we had to move on from the auguring and blaming each other for situation we had no
control over ,

Him : “ uphi uma ? “

Me : “ prayer meeting “

Him : “ she still does that ….? “

Me : “ without fail every Friday “ we chuckled

Mlondi still hates or should I say dislike Mvelo we had to bag him to tag along with us today , in his
twisted mind he believes that Mvelo is fuck boy a cheat and a player ... He basically described himself .

I know Mvelo is not perfect he has a past maybe a present i don't know ... But he respect me enough
that i have never picked up any bad vibes when it comes to that . but yesterday there was something
about that call and his phone ringing non stop , was I jealous bloody hell I was .. Was I insecure ....ohh
hell no I'm Sbahle Bhengu I got the looks and body and damn do I kick ass , bitches better be careful who
they mess with once he put a ring on it

Mlondi : so you really marrying this fuck boy "

Me : I love him ... He loves me so yes siyashada "

Him : hayi futseck wena .. " I laughed , as much as my brothers are back in my life I still asked my
mother to walk me down the Aisle haybo siwe sivuka naye she has been my father and mother the past
years so nje I appreciate that women
“ morning “ Nsika said as he wheeled himself in

“ hi “

Mlondi : “ moja “

I decided to dish up for my brother we were laughing and talking like old times , my mood today was
just blissful

Nsika : “ Thandi asked me why you never invited her to your wedding “

Me : “ waist of paper “ I looked at there plates it was cleaned out , yoo this boys can eat

I took the plates to the kitchen

Mlondi : “ what ? “ he asked walking in followed by Nsika

Me : “ look guys I understand that you and Thandi have a special bond , but mina I’m just another little
sister that she forgot about … “ I finished placing the dishes in the washing machine took my phone
and my mom car keys

Nsika : “ and uyaphi ? “

Me : “ I need to do my hair big brother … “

Ml.ondi : “ but we still talking ! “

Me : if its has anything to Do with Thandi I'm sorry I'm not interested .
Nsika nodded , while Mlondi was busy shouting , does the guy ever shut up I left him there calling out
my name , i jumped into my moms car , and drove off playing hip hop , I arrived at the Bhengu royal
complex , security was new I wander what Mlondi is up too because he spend most of his days here , I
hope he will not make matters worse , I packed outside Dudu house and she was out like a lightning

Didy : hay babe “

She pulled me for a hug .

Me : “ Dudu come on you know how I feel about hugs “

Her : “ ‘ooh shut up … dmn have I missed you … .your mother said that remember that we leaving at
15h00 “

Me : she in your house ? “

She nodded “ well all the aunts are I think they having a meeting or something ? “

I stepped on the break

Her: hay...boo!

Me : “ what? going on ? “

Her : “ shoot me and my big mouth … “

Me : “ talk ! “

Her : “ ook , ok … they just laid Aunt Thabi to rest this morning”
Me : “ and they did not tell us “

Her : “ with all the drama going on in this house … it was best that it was kept private and very intimate
.... Beside this women are excited about your wedding "

I started the car

Me : “ I see … any news on the trial ? “ Dudu father is the family lawyer and he has been trying to cut a
deal with the magistrate to realise his brother from jail only two were involved in legal activities and
my Uncle being the kingpin

Her : “ everything is on a stand still , the police commissioners keeps saying that Give me Bhengu and we
can work on a plea , so right now they all in holding cell … “

Her : “ do you perhaps know where he is ? “

Me : “I may look all tough baby girl but I have no power to hide such a fat man “

She laughed “ my money is on your brothers …. “

Me : “ does are strong allegation missy be careful where you run that mouth of yours , I just found my
brothers aren’t willing to let them take a fall for that pig

I smiled “don’t forget that not all Bhengu man where that bad … some of us we suffered under a hand
of women … “

Her : and I hope that hag rote in that jail cell “ we bust out and laugh we finally made it to the mall .

.
Mvelo ***

We were drinking cool drinks me and Sbu he looked lost he was not talking at all it like his body was
here but his mind was floating into space , this can in my hand is not going down , I should be
celebrating that I'm marrying a girl that I love , but things in my house are falling apart , Pam is sick and
breathing through a ventilator on the other hand someone is planning an attack on my house , Sli is
nagging as fuck . I just found out that my daughter is gifted last night she told me there is baby coming
and she told me We must name her Naledi ... I'm just stressed , its all too much , was this the right time
to get married , when I don't even know if I'm coming or going .

" let me go check up on her " I pat his shoulder , as he walked past me , I found him crying like a baby
last night when Pam went to semi coma , we thought we lost her but she smiled and said

" I can't go without seeing Sbahle ... "

That why my grandmother has decide to have this emergency dinner , talking about Koko she is just
broken , her and Pam never spend that much time together but when they did Pam just became koko
baby girl ... I wiped a alone tea that rushed down on my face ..

" how is she ?" I placed my hands on my face as Mbali set next to me ,

Me : what can you see Mfethu "

She did not respond , Mbali is Makhumalo daughter she a stud she is more of my boy then girl , she was
born with a prophetic calling it's more spiritual ordained

Her : she too peaceful ...but she can not stand the pain she is feeling now ... She wants to go "

I looked at her with teas on my face

Pam had been on high doses of morphine to control the pain and morphine causes hallucinations, so I
ignored much of what she said to me last night , she talked about seeing people mom and dad she saw
all this while lying on her bed... She refuse to go to hospital so we turned her room to a hospital ward
fully equipped

Me : it's not her time "

Mbali : if we all knew our time we would cheated death every time it came to closed ... When 'THE" our
father calls his sheep we listen and follow , Corinthians 15:53–55

"For this perishable body must put on the imperishable, and this mortal body must put on immortality.
When the perishable puts on the imperishable, and the mortal puts on immortality, then shall come to
pass the saying that is written: 'Death is swallowed up in victory.' 'O death, where is your victory? O
death, where is your sting? ..."_she tap my shoulder and we set there lost in our thought ,

When I walked back in the house to check up on her she was in a rare, lucid state she said to me, “Who
is this old man standing at the foot of my bed?”

I blew it off as another hallucination must be the drugs, She then repeated her question and asked that I
move her oxygen mask , she was frail beautiful but I did not recognise her ,

Her : who does he look like to you?”

Me: I don't know sweetheart you tell me "

She described the old man as having white hair and wearing a white shirt with lion skin on his left
shoulder, She then said he was smiling at her i turned to look at her and asked,

Me : has he said anything to you ?"

I knew very well who she was talking about it was my great (*3) grand father Somdala Mnguni

Her : yes .. "

“is he here for you?” I lump on my throat was so big that I find it hard to breath, She then paused as if
she were listening to him speak, then turned to me and said, “No. He said the moon in the sky will bring
harvest time "

She smiled as she squeezed my hand

Her : when is my Queen coming? "

Me : do you want to speak to her ?"

Her : no ...I want to meet her ...go call her and let me get ready " the minute I left the room ... This hurt
so much

To be continued

chapter 39

unedited ***

I could not stand seeing Pam in that stage , I decided to lock myself in my study I was exhausted , it was
pointless consulting with my ancestors because they were not going to show me anything, right now I
have so many question and the only person who might have answers is in the royal mountains , I haven't
seen my grandfather NkosiyaBantu since I got here and the only thing my grandmother ever does is just
cry. My house is upside down and it's out of my control , I'm angry , sad but mostly confused. I gulped
down the content of whisky and allow it to burn my throat , I took out my phone and texted Sibahle
again , she has tendencies of not answering her phone , she finally responded and told me she doing
her hair , I looked at the time and immediately became worried is she going to make it on time ?... why
is she even dolling herself up when she already look so hot , damn I miss her so much ,to think about it
she is the only thing that makes sense in my life right now.
I heard a soft nock and Makhumalo walked in after I invited her in , she looked drained and tired , Im
guessing she hasn't slept at all since last night .

So when Me and maKhumalo finally got home she just started talking and chanting she was running
around the house burning impepho , cleansing the house with water mixed with herbs ... She was
sprinkling it around ( chela ) she was speaking to our ancestors , she cussed and chased away a lot of bad
spirit that were roaming in the yard ( wabethela ).

she then asked to spend few minutes with Zithelo in the ancestral room alone she picked up some sort
of a vibe from her , they came out after an hour or so with sleeping Zee on her arm,

she told me that that when she was sick someone or entity gave her poison food in her sleep ( idliso)
But it did not walk as it should have ,but only made her sick since Zee body fought the poison out , she
also told me to thank idlozi lami ( my ancestors ) for protecting her , she also picked up that Zee is a
special child she the first Lioness that may shift when she comes of age ...she told me that after the
wedding I need to do ceremony for Zithelo to concede the spirit in her.

no doubt I feared for my daughters life and I blamed Sli for being careless , how could she put our
daughters life in danger like that ?

I asked Makhumalo why would they try to poison my child , she told me it was to get close to me , but
since that did not work they uses insila Ka Zee ( hair , nails , bath water ) mixed with some muthi ( vudu
) on Sli , when I asked what for ? she just yawned and took her stuff and left us there with an
instruction to keep the yellow , green , blue and white candle burning in the ancestral room till she
comes back .

So there she is before me now , I hope she will share some light in the million question that I have for
her .

Me : mama I thought you will be on the mountain "

Her : your enemy's are coming ... They don't want this marriage to happen "

I stood up

Me : who is doing this ?"

She set on the couch opposite me ,

Her : he did all of this to have seat in the royal table ...he will try by all means to have that power back "
I turned and looked at her

Me: what do you mean back ? Who are you talking about ? “

My anger just went from 0 to 1000

She clapped hands and called my clan name bowing her head my heart beat came down so was my
breathing

Her : Silindile was suppose to be strong in faith so that should this day come she was going to be
protected by divinity her anger and disappointment has made her weak and that allowed darkness to
walk inside her house .."

Me : she is the cause off all this ?"

She nodded , I banged the table with my fist

Her : she is your mate ....or should I say she was your mate ? "

I started walking around the room

Her : the love you had for her was powerful and would have overcome any challenges , she was told by
your ancestors that she will go trough test and tribulations to be with you because her blood is not of
royalty , she was asked to hold your fire and wait for you , while she was giving a task to connect with
her warrior Angel to enhance her faith ... She was suppose to be a powerful prayer warrior so that she
will withstand and endure any hardship and no evil was going to come close to her "

Me: I don't understand "

Her : Silindile is favoured child , her birth was a miracle and she was destined for greater power in life ...
That why when you two meet you conceived a child that is gifted"

I placed my hands on my face

Her : her love for you has made her weak and that alone has opened doors for the dark world to creep
in , she has allowed the most darkest spirit in her life ... The spirit of unbelief

I looked at her fuck sli is so stupid it's the same spirit I cursed away when she tried to take her life few
years back

Me : but I thought she was strong in faith I mean she runs sermons and talks and ...

She shook her head

Her : Unbelief is believing something other than what God has said about a situation. You can believe
Jesus was raised from the dead, you can believe He is your Lord, you can believe He is coming soon, but
if you don’t believe and do what He says, you are operating in unbelief. You can believe in Him, but still
not believe what He says. The Bible calls this an evil heart—a hardened heart (Hebrews 3:12). And a
heart of unbelief grieves God. . . Sli was told by the higher power about destiny and her purpose in life ,
she was not spiritually ready to be with she was suppose to Wait for the full blood moon , and all was
going to go according to destiny but destiny was was not fulfilled and now she is the very same person
that is responsible in bringing darkness to this home ... "

Me : what !!!"

Her : you need to be strong because the attack is on your Queen ...."

Me : No!"
Her : you are connected to the queen spiritually and when they attack her it affects you too ...That’s
why both of you had nose bleed at the same time this morning …. “

Me : “ is she going to be ok ? “ I was panicking I can never allow anything to happened to Sbahle ,I might
as well lay my life in the hands of that person that trying to harm her .

She nodded

Her : she has Royal blood she is protected by the fallen Queen's , but they going to use your weakness
to destroy your marriage ...thread carefully my king if you hurt the Queen… blood will be shared .... The
Bhengu brothers are a force not to be reckoned with .."

I sank down .... Not Sbahle not her I can't lose her

Her : you need to be strong there is no time for that. come we have a visitors"

As she said that a knock came trough and the savants told us that we have visitors from Silindile
Grandfather .

Sbahle ****

I did not feel like telling Didy about Mvelo and I to her we just close friends , I did not want to bust my
bubble so soon being in love is all to new to me any way and as much as I hang out with Didy she is still
Bhengu and I don’t trust my family with my life.

Didy was talking non stop she into fashion and knows way to much about what's in and what not she
had so many ideas about the dress I must ware she was taking me in and out of boutiques till I feel my
feet about to bleed.

Me : “ Didy we came to the mall to buy a dress for tonight and do hair , this walking around is bloody
tiring and to top it up I’m running out of time … just make up your mind please !!! “

Her : “ ok … Princess I’m taking you to the spar to relax and I will do the run around “

I just rolled my eyes , I really did not have the energy to entertain her we stopped by the spar, the front
desk lady gave us a brochure ,

Didy : “ full body massage, body scrub , facial , and hair and nails please “ the lady nodded and lead the
way

The way my body was so relaxed after the massage and detoxing in the steam room I felt like a feather
this girl know her shit

I had face mask on and some lady was doing my nails I did not want this fancy nail tips so I just went
with French manicure with a bit of glitter,

Didy walked in
Her : “ wow look at you “

Me : “ did you find a dress ? “

Her : “ got 5 choices but we need ,to pic three … “

She showed me pics and my mouth was on the floor … I have never worn such elegant dress in my life
before

Me : “ you pic girl I don’t know too me all this is just too much “

Her : “ ooh brother you such a boy , let me send this pics to your mother she will now .. “

I was ushered to the salon to do my hair they have unplated my braids so they just had to straighten
it , our hairdresser was very chatty she talked to Didy about everything , I just gave up on feeling
embarrass on how this girl act and talk to people , it was all laughs and chit chats moment to her

Didy : I hope you have experience with this kind of hair, my sister is attending her engagement party
tonight and I want her to be more than beautiful she must blow her in-laws away “

Hairdresser: don’t worry when I’m done with your sister you won't even recognize her

Didy : you have a 1hr bebe to make her look fabulous

I rolled my eye at them and took out my phone from my bag , I realized I had tree miss call from Mvelo
and four massages , I read my massage

“ hi “

“ what are you up too ? ”

“ don’t tell me you too busy to talk to me now!! ”

“ hayboooo ! ”

Looking at the massages that he left for me I smiled as I started typing

“ hi Ngonyama yesizwe “

I know by addressing him like that he will calm down and smile , I have feeling that Mvelo has a lot on
his plate , I feel like he currying the world in her shoulder

Him : “ Ndlonkulu was ka Mnguni”

He responded and I blushed

Him : “ it's about time I thought you forgot about me “

Me: “ I’m pampering myself for tonight “

Him: “ why didn’t you tell me I would have flew down to accompany you”

Me: “ naaa , its kwl I got my crazy cuz with me “

Him: “ how far are you with the pampering ?”

Me: “ I’m doing my hair now , then get my dress , then make up “

Him: “ did you see the time its almost 14:00, are you going to be done by the take off time ? your plain
leaves in 17:00“ aish yah , I doubt that if I will make it but hay it my husband jet so whatever

Me: “ I will be fashionably late , you are marrying me against my free will any way “

Him: “ is that so now “

I smiled because I knew he was laughing his but off

Me: “ I got to go , chat later ne “

Him: “ I don’t even know why you pampering yourself for … because to me you just look like a goddess “

Me : “ you making me blush Mnguni “

Him : “I wish I can see those tiny eyes and pouty lips right now “

Me : “ stop it my cheeks are turning red .. “

Him :I love you uyezwa “

Does he ever get enough of saying those 4 letter words to me ?

Me : “ how will I forget when you tell me every time you get … “

He chuckled

Him : “ fuck im whipped “ we bust out and laughed

Him : tell those people to speed it up, don’t even think about keeping me waiting for you “

Me: “ lol later “

I found Didy looking at me

Her : “ and that ? “

Me : “ didy go get the dress and send me there account detail so I will pay on line “

Her : “ mmm I see you cuz and you got a lot of explaining to do “

Me “ Just go !! “

She laughed and walked out

It took forever to straighten my hair and finally she styled it , i have very long hair thanks to moms genes
They blow dry it giving it that bounce when I walked I was looking totally different ,

I was now waiting for Didy she took forever , mom was calling asking me where I am ? it was a mess ,
time was not on my side , Didy must be like a child in candy shop with all designer dresses surrounding
her no doubt
Didy : ok sisi omuhle! umyisephy u sisi wami ? “ she finally arrived I .was about to send a search party to
look for her

I giggled , well she right I look absolutely breathtaking could not recognize my self either , she grabbed
my hand

Didy : we need to go home now we already running late “

I looked at her like what , she the one that was indecisive on which dress to take ?

Me : but what about makeup ? fitting of the dress ?

Didy : trust me I got you that ” I shrug my shoulder as she pulled my hair

Me: ok ok ok stop dragging me phela “

I thank the lady in the spar , they all gave me a hug and wished me luck for my big day .

On the road Didy was driving and talking with his hands at the same time , the way I hate being a
passenger when she is driving because i constantly have to remind her that she is driving ,

Mom texted that I must come to my father's house , they all gathered there

Her : “ wow … looks like everyone is here “

My mouth was on the floor …the number of cars parked outside where the fuck are this people coming
from ?

Mlondi was standing by his car with a big pocket of chips

Me : “ what’s going on ?

Him : “ you getting married and you are late … “ I rolled my eyes and ran inside the house

I found mom , Didy mom and some other close relatives in the Kitchen , aish women and kicker gossip ,

Mom : ooh mtanami you look so pretty “

Didy : pretty is for little Queen mother this girls here is smoking hot and compliments of me “

We laughed , I gritted my alders in the house

Dudu Father : “ good you here we can go now ,… we already kept the pilot waiting “

Me : “ I’m not dressed “

Mom : “ we will first stop by the hotel for that …I have packed all of your close and whatever you may
need , I hope I was able to pack everything … you brother has packed your bags in the car … “ she
looked up “ baba omcane … asibike ukuthi umtwana uyahamba manje uya emzini “

One aunt came to me placed a rug over my shoulders , head scuff on my head , ooh crap there goes my
hairstyle … next thing I know we in the ancestral rondavel and Im choking in impepho … mom was
crying … I was crying it was an overwhelming feeling , this is my last day in my father's house as a girl …
this time tomorrow i'll be someone's wife ….ooh GOD ! this is really happening now … my family is giving
me away.

.to be continued

Wedding bells are nocking , Mnguni household has so much drama right now … will this wedding even
happened … aish asazi , It's Friday the 13 anything is possible

chapter 40

* I'm using my phone typing this inset , I'm sorry I could not edit ***

Sbahle ****

So after a lot of crying and hugging my family saying farewell to me we left , only close family members
took the Mnguni Jet the rest took commercial flight I was somehow down , my whole life I wanted
change but never thought it will come on form of a man ,

Did I make a right decision ? Is it too late to change my mind ? Do I really want to be someone wife at
the age a of 18 ? What do I even know about love ?

I had so many questions , I mean part of the reason I'm doing this is because Mvelo makes me so happy ,
he gets me and has shown me nothing but love , but now I look at my mom , my brother that just came
back to a picture is this really an ideal time to leave home ?

When we marry, we face a difficult balancing act with our parents / family On one hand, the fifth of the
Ten Commandments tells us to “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the
land that the Lord your God is giving you” (Exodus 20:12). No matter what your age, you should honor
your parents by spending time with them, thanking them for what they’ve done well, caring for them as
necessary …

But then we look at Genesis 2:24, part of the narrative where God creates the institution of marriage.
This verse tells us, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold feast to his wife, and
they shall become one flesh ” The Hebrew word for “leave” means to forsake, to leave behind, to
literally let go. As difficult as it may be, when you marry you declare to the world, “No other person on
earth is more important to me than my spouse . " Your spouse becomes a higher priority than your
parents or family , can I leave without my family ? But yet again I have leaved so many years alone and
Mvelo brings a whole new ball game , I was resting my head on my mother lap , she was rubbing my
back

“ shuuuuuu …. Stop crying Sbahle “

Me : “ im scared mommy …. “

Her : “ I know sweat heart I know … “

Mvelo ***

I keep looking at the time and this man kept talking in circles , I have no idea what is silindile
Grandfather is doing here on the eve of my wedding but there was something about him that was dark
and a bit unsettling , he was here with a some other man who called himself Silindile Uncle , Out of blue
Silindile family are up in her life last time I checked she was disowned for marrying Zwane ... But ever
since she became the mother of my child this people here became to friendly with her and my daughter
, I looked at my annoyed Grandmother , Austin was folding his arms looking at them directly in the eyes ,
Im glad that my uncle Mzamo is not here this meeting would have gone from bad to worse in seconds.

Koko : I'm sure that you did not come all this way to praise our beautiful home , so may you please tell
us the reason for your visit"

Sli Grandfather cleared his trough , can they just get this over and done with ,
Sli grandfather : with all due respect Ngonyama , we apologize to take your time we know that you got a
wedding stuff to attend to ..."

I nodded

Him : but we thought that we should come and address the issue of Silindile "

I set up straight

Koko : khulumani please ..."

The uncle : As you know that Silindile is the mother of the royal princess Zithelo ,"

He looked at me and quickly looked down

Me : go on "

Him : since inkosi ( the king ) is taking a wife now..."

Koko : not just a wife but royal princess "

I looked at her making her stop talking so I can see where this story is going

Sli / gran: we fully aware of that that why we thought that the king can consider taking Silindile as
second wife ..."

Koko clapped hands " yooh"

Austin set up straight , I on the other hand was speechless it all made sense on what makhumalo said
now
Me : why "

The Uncle smiled " you see the king can take as many wife's he wants after he marries his rightful
Queen , so for the well being of Zithelo it will be best if her mother and father leave under the same roof
as husband and wife "

I nodded , and they smiled

Me : so let's say I do take Silindile as second wife ... For the sake of Zee you say right. .. "

Koko : sorry to cut you off my son but as Queen the laws of the royal house say that a man does not
chose a second wife , the Queen herself must see a need if the house needs another women , she will
find the perfect match suited for her husband and they will make her second wife ... All I'm trying to say
is that we hear what you saying but its not up to the king but to his Queen to make that decision "

The man swallowed and looked at one another's

Sli uncle : but there is a child involved "

Koko : she Mnguni and her mother is free to visit her anytime "

Grandfather : you can not separate a child from her mother "

Austin : technically we doing Sli a favour she hardly at home and we can not allow one of our own to be
baby seated by people we do not truest "

The uncle : nkosi yami wena uthini ( my king what do you say )

Me : I can not go against the word of my Queen mother and right hand man "
The uncle : there has to be away that we can do ... You can not just impregnate a women and leave her
like a uses tissue ... You need to take responsibility of your actions !"

Wow did this ass raise his voice at me

Koko : yeyiwena who do you think you are coming to our home and disrespecting us like this ??!!

They bow down and apologizes

Me : ok if i hear you correctly you asking that Sli becomes my second wife and technically my other
Queen right ?"

Koko : iyoooooh with that commoners blood I don't think so "

Austin chuckled ,

Me :so i marry your daughter and we unite families right ? "

He nodded

Sli / gran: yebo Nkosi yami, you see I was not happy about you only acknowledged Zithelo when I
introduced her to your family , that some how left Silindile and an outcasts ...she has never been the
same after that ...so this might help her ..."_

Me : I see "

Koko : ubonani Mvelo "

I raised my hand indicating to her that she must stop , she mumbled something and folded her arms
Me : I understand that you want me to do this for Zithelo , thank you for having Zee best interest at
heart , but what's in for you old man ?"

He stopped smiling and looked at me

Me : I know how you were kicked out from the Ncube royal house "

Well let just say that I do my research and background check on every one that comes to my house ... I
never trusted this man from the word go , the fact that he took Zee against sli will and came with her
here told me two things it's either he was being a concern parent doing the right thing or his intention
were just based on what he may benefit in all off this , when I had a talk with Makhumalo I knew very
well that he might be the one conspiring to have his hands on my family riches

Him : I was young back than and I'm ashamed of what I did "

Me : you committed treason , you sold information about the royal house you worked for to its enemy "

He looked down

Me : I know that you are an opportunist , when you realises that a man who knocked up Silindile is
royalty you went against Sli will to introduced the child to me , you wanted a reward from me but I only
took my child and thanked you ...you have tried using muthi on Zee but that alone almost killed you
when you were faced with a lion ... And now you thought that you must use Silindile ... If I marry her
that will give you a seat in my kingdom ... So stop me if I'm wrong !!"

The man was sweating ... The uncle knelled before me

" I'm sorry your highness I did not know "

Me : Austin call the guards ... I never want to see you in my house in Silindile house , if I found out that
you still consulting with your Witch I will not hesitate to kill you ... I'm only giving you your pathetic life
to keep because you're Silindile family... And if you think about double crossing me ever again
...Nci....Nci. Nci....uzophambana nezulu "_
They were bagging me crying and asking me to have mercy on there lives

Me : I have lean that if you allow your enemy's to live , they might regroup and strike again ... I can not
risk that I have a child and wife to take care off so watch your back old man ...."

I stood up calling sbahle leaving the man crying

Sbahle ***

We finally arrived in Swaziland , Mvelo reserved rooms for us in his hotel , I was escorted to his
penthouse in the hotel

Mom : wow this is beautiful "I looked around and yep it was breath taking , Didy mom and the other
aunts were lost , I looked at the huge picture hanging on the wall Mvelo was seated on his royal chair he
was wearing his royal outfit and on his left it was his grandmother on his right it was her sister and on
the floor there was big white lion ,

Mom: next picture he will hang will be of you and him "

She hugged me from behind

Me: is that a real lion ? "

Her : it looks real to me ..." i gasped while she laughed

I still wish to know why his village is called Ngonyama village ...( village of the great lions ) could it be
that they have strange relationship with lions ?

Mom : go get ready love we don't have much time "

Didy dragged me by the hand rushed me to the gust room to do my make up one of my Cousin Nosipho
took out the dress and stated screaming , I looked at them also and I must admit I could not believe this
were mine

Didy : I'm glad you like them hope they fit , come seat down let me do my magic "

Me : who taught you make up I mean this whole fashion things "

Didy : you were not the only one that was lock up , having this blood is curse I tell you , so it was
pointless in crying about being a prison in my own home so I took classes on line and I guess I was good
at it ..."

Me : wow ... I'm so proud of you ..."

Her : yah "

She said feeling down

Me : what's wrong ... "

Didy : For me to get my degree in fashion I must showcase my designs but my father is not buying it ...
Next year he told me I'm going to Capetown to study a cause chosen by him ... "

Nosipho : at least you not arranged to get married"

Didy : I wish I was maybe I can start leaving my life .. "

Nosipho : sister listen hear not all arranged marriage are as beautiful as Sbahle's , she is lucky she is
loved... "

I looked down I was wrapped up in my own screw up childhood that I didn't even realise that I'm not the
only one that going trough this

Nosipho: so you nervous about today "

Me: yep " I looked at nosipho she looks more like our maid then our blood relative's , she was really
close with Aunt Thabi, I still don't know her story but she looks old then her real age

Didy: hayi sisi stop moving around you will make my work of art messy

Nosiho : art is messy didy

We laughed

Nosipho :I heard what Nwabisa did I'm very sorry "

Me : its OK she was influenced by her mom ..."

Didy : but to see herself worthy to have your man and you not deserving ... She is not the kind of family I
want to keep around "

Nosipho : girl don't say that , you know behind closed doors you don't know what life's she leaves "

Me :but she is educated and about to marry to a family that likes her being someone's wife is just a
bonus for her I still can not get why she said that Mvelo deserves a women like her then me "
Nosipho : again I'm going to tell you this not all arranged marriage are like yours some of us left home
kicking and screaming ... So be grateful that you have kind loving carrying man ... Not all of us are that
Lucky .. I'm not trying to say what she did was right ... But sometimes we always wish to have what
others have ...based on the life we are leaving "

Me : be careful what you wish for ...you don't know nothing about my life "

Nosipho : it looks better then how my life turned out to be .. I got 3 kids with a man I don't love it was
forced marriage that I sometimes wish I had strength to take my life and my kids because every time I
try to leave something keeps pulling me back " I know I'm not an emotional person no enjoy physical
contact but she needs a hug ... ,

I stood up and hugged her

Nosipho : don't Cry please I'm good after giving him 3_children he found another young girl that he
spend time with in the city ... So finally I have my freedom its not perfect but its my freedom "

Didy : fuck I hate being a Bhengu " she was a crying mess so was nosipho"

Me : you and me both "

Nosipho : I guest I do too because my mom is Bhengu ..."

Me : yaa maybe you right about Nwabisa I judge her before getting to know the real deal about her "

Didy : even so that does not justify what she did "

I nodded this got me thinking about Nwabisa she leaves a veery private life what was her end game in
all off this

Didy finally was done with my make up I looked at my self in the mirror and screamed she stopped me
just in time before I touched my face
Me: what have you done?

Didy : you don’t like it?

Me : no I love it I look so so so..."

Didy:beautiful I know , princess you deserve to shine and this is your day, don’t you dare cry please just
hold it in , let me get dressed while your face set ..", I could not believe that I looked so amazing, mom
knocked on the door and she had tears of joy on her eyes, she hugged me so tight , she was all dressed
up and looking elegant as always, she looked at me

Mom: awusemhle mtanami , ,

Me: tanks maka sbahle

Mom: we living now Nsika will go with us because you ladies are taking forever to finish , Wena Nosipho
asambe ... Mlondi will take you girls , and that screaming must stop please..."

We laughed , she left and Didy advised me to pick a dress, I did not want to were white it was not my
wedding after all and yellow was so not my style, so I went with royal blue dress, the shade of baby
blue in this dress was not too bright no to light but a perfect shade, it was one arm and had a rose like
pattern of glitter that going across the dress it was body hugging and showing my curves , the dress was
long and had a fish tail design ,didy jaws could not drop any lower that it was.

Me: so how do I look ?

didy: breath taking

Didy : you got curves?"

We laughed , my phone rang and didy answered it

Didy : Sbahle phone hello

she put the phone on loud speaker , it was Mvelo , today he has been calling and blowing my phone like
crazy

Mvelo : aaah hi... May I please speak to Sbahle please"

Didy : she has cold feet I don’t think she can do this

We giggled

Mvelo: what? , I’m coming right there now !

Didy : just kidding tiger, we are on our way, we just need to convince Cinderella to wear hills and we off"

Mvelo : people are panicking now kindly hurry up please, by the way may I speak to Sbahle

Didy : nop..." I snatched the phone from her

Me : hi"

Him : baby where are you ...should I come get you ?

I laughed

Me : I'm on my way ..."

I heard him breath out loud

We did not talk much as he told me that my family just arrived ohh shoot we are late, I hanged up after
calming him down

Didy : now that what I call love "

we laughed, I toked my shoes there were silver stilettos hills I do not know why girls wear such shoes
there are so uncomfortable ,

Me : didy take my sleepers please I do not think I will last the whole night with this shoes

I grabbed my clash bag, looked at my self in the mirror again I smiled to myself , we took couple of
selfies before we left didy and social media , she felt the need to brag about this event and post my pics.
we left home around 19:10 yep we were fashionable late, I was looking to fabulous and to stunning to
care.

I'm typing next one on the way ...

chapter 41

.still nor edited sorry ...

Sbahle***
We arrived at the royal house and wow I must say that damn this people are rich the palace was
something out of this world , I have never seen such beauty the car did not park in front of the house
but took another road within the royal realms there were lot of tress decorate in light that we passed by
,

Me : where we going " I asked Mlondi

Him : the guards said I must follow this threes I will see an out door lay out "

Didy : wow this place is so beautiful "

Mlondi : keep saying that and you will walk to the event "

I laughed while Didy pouted , i continued to do my breath exercise , the near we got the place the more
my heart rate jumped to my throat was I having cold feel or wedding jitters it was all happening at the
same time , the car engine stopped and I looked outside the venue And indeed it was an spectacular
outdoor event the setting was by the dam or river , this right here you only see on T.V or wedding
magazines ,

there was a stretch tent and the decoration was out of this world just by looking it from outside , the
music was playing softly in the background and everyone was dressed up for the event , I was glad to
see that the guest list was at minimum judging by the cars parked outside.

Fear creped in what does the most hottest bachelor who's also a King see in girl like me , I'm just a rural
princess this kind of life is not for me .. Will I fit in ? ... Will this marriage last ... Does he really love me?

Mlondi turned and looked at me

Him : you ready "

I bit my lip and nodded

Him : you know you still have time to stop this whole thing ... Just say the word "

I thought of Mvelo , I can not humiliate him like this but throughout the time I have spent with him
there was so much unsaid , we just fell in love without addressing what love is .. After what my mom
went through I can not even think I will survive that , I'm no expect in love I mean his the first men I have
kissed , said I love you and will allow in my father's palace.

Mlondi shook me " are you OK ?" He asked

Me : I'm good "

Him : OK if you say so " he stepped out and opens the door for me

I tried stepping out of the car but I was too nervous Mlondi asked me to step out of the car ,

I just looked I way ,

Didy : come on sis lets go"

I kept quiet

Mlondi breath out loud and closed the door

I could not find the right words to say i was scared ... Im only 18 for goodness sake this is too much for
me

Didy: this is your day sisi stop shying out , for once in your life do you ... Mvelo loves you and he will
make you happy this is the day to shine like you were born too"

I shook my head I took out my phone and started typing a message to mvelo
Me : hi I'm outside , I'm sorry for coming late but I have so many questions and doubtful thought about
us , I have no experience in love but I know what I want , If you’re going to want to earn my love, then
you’re going to have to be willing to do whatever it takes to prove to me that you’re worthy of my
attention. You are going to have to be resilient and persistent. You can’t give up so easily. I need to
know that you’re going to be the kind of guy who sits and stays even when life starts to get hard and
rough. I need to know that you’re going to be the kind of guy who is going to be willing to face whatever
adversities our relationship may have to face. And if you’re just going to give up on me just because I’m
making it a little too hard for you, then I will have dodged a bullet.... I just need you to be honest with
me , I’m not single because I can’t be loved. I’m just single because I know what love looks like, funny
that i don't gave a choice of not settling for anything less , because of the blood that runs inside of me . .
you call me the chosen one am I that for you or for your kingdom .. I need to know what am I getting
myself into so that I will know my role " ... I punched in send

didy : no man you can not do this after everything you have been through you going to run away from
happiness ?"

Me : all this glitz and gold may not be worth the shine Didy ... Just let me think for once please"_

I placed my hands on my face

Didy jumped out of the car , i'm guessing to call my Mom , I did not care less because she was the one
that agreed to this in the first place, it's like everything that I went trough come rushing back , listening
to Nosipho story made me realised that this is an arranged marriage after all , man change and what will
that leave me It’s so hard having to deal with the stigma of being unmarried especially when you born
with royal blood . It’s just so frustrating – as if the integrity of my existence is merely tied to whether I’m
in a relationship or not. I hate that we all live in a society that over-glorifies false loves and mediocre
romances. It’s as if you’re automatically assumed to be living a decent life so as long as you’re in a
married with someone – regardless if that relationship is making you happy or not. It’s sick. It’s
disgusting... Yes I'm happy now and I feel love but my gut feeling is telling me that heartbreak is
knocking on my window am I ready to give a heart to a man that will turn around and break it ?

The voices where to much ... I'm over thinking I can't breathe the minute Didy stepped out of the car I
just press auto lock button on the car and locked myself inside , my mother came few minutes later , i
could hear her but was not moved... I hate this feeling of loving Mvelo so much that I even fear of what
the future holds for us ,
My mother called out my name knocking on the window , the voices in my head were to loud that I
blocked her out she started banging on the window and demanded I open the door I did no such I just
put my hands on my ear trying to shut everyone out she banged the window and kept shouting at me , I
just sat there and put my head down , she even threaten to smash the window of the car, I just did not
careless I kept saying to myself please just go away I'm sure my brothers were toasting victory to my
actions right now ...

Out of a sudden it just became quiet I felt relief that they have given up . moment later there was a soft
knock on the window I raised my head to look , Mvelo was standing there with his hands on is pocket ,
he was wearing a black / Navy tuxedo white shirt with black buttons , he was not wearing a tie, I looked
at his face but he did not show any expression , he just looked at me after it felt like a lifetime looking at
each other

mvelo : open the door please "

I rolled down the window , and did not say a word

Him: may I come in please

I looked at him and pressed the unlock button . he walked towards the driver's seat opened the door,
and he started the car

Him: let's get away from here"

I nodded and we drove away

Mvelo ***
What suppose to be a family dinner turned out to be something out of control , the guest list moved
from 20 to 50 , the Bhengu rocked up in numbers , and then my friends , close neighboring royalty family
, business friends it was just too much , I had a feeling that Sbahle might not feel comfortable with this
whole thing " too crowded for her " and yes my suspicions came to reality , looking at her crying and
confused broke my heart she needed air so I decided on a drive to clear her mind .

Her massage was direct and not filtered one of the things I love about her is how she is so direct and
speaks her mind

, we were not far from the venue but it was secluded, we stood outside the car I place her on top of the
car and stood in between her legs , I placed my jacket over her shoulder , she looked very beautiful , I'm
the luckiest man right now

Her : stop looking at me like that "

Me : you beautiful "

She looked down

Me : do you still want to marry me ? "

She slowly nodded

I breath out loud and ran my hands on my face

Me : why do you compare what you and I have to rest of what the world have ? "

Her : I have never been in love before so I don't know this feeling if its real , if its temporally or fake ..."

Me : Sbahle me and you we were arranged to get married for the sake of our villages .. But I fell in love
with you , I'm not saying ' I do ' to a stranger tomorrow but I'm saying. ' I do' to a women I have fallen in
love with , look Sthandwa sami ..Love is a risk. When we fall in love with someone, we are essentially
taking a chance on that person. Why? Because whenever we fall in love, we get used to a certain way of
feeling; a certain way of looking at the world. However, love can falter. Love can fail. Love can change.
And when that happens, we are forced to adjust. Sometimes, love can even force us to let go. And that’s
always painful. That’s always going to be difficult. That is always the kind of struggle that most people
wish they wouldn’t have to go through. But still, that’s the truth of love. It can rise, but it can also fall.
And that’s why I only want to be placing my chips in you because i know that you actually going to give
me the best chances at not losing it all ..."

She looked at me with tears in her

Me : let me teach you to love babe I'm not perfect but I rather be single then not have this chance with
you "

I breath out loud and chuckled

Me : look at what you made me do now ... I just said my vows to you "

She chuckled and buried her face on my shoulders

Her : do you still want to marry me after what happened tonight? "

I laughed and held her waist

Me : of cause I will marry you ... I love how you made me an Ass in front of everyone by not showing up
on time and when you do arrive you refuse to get out of the car you send me a long ass massage
breaking up with me .. " I bust out and laughed , she held her mouth before joining me

Me : you different Sbahle you are your own person , if something does not seat right with you , you
don't compromise. You don't worship me or make me the center of your world you just ... A breath of
fresh air "

I held her hand

Me : I know this may sound cocky and conceited at first. It may be coming off that I’m a little foo full of
myself; that I think that I am entitled to all of the best things that life can offer. But when it comes to
you is it really so wrong to be thinking that way? Is it really so wrong for us to want only what we want;
and to not settle for anything that we feel like we aren’t meant for? ... I need a strong women by my
side Sbahle I'm a difficult man to handle and I get bored if a women does not challenge me ...you my
little feisty princess you keep me on my toes all the time and love that about you "

Without warning she attacked me with a kiss , it was juicy , heated and so good I found myself moaning
in her mouth , fuck does this women knows that I haven't had sex in weeks and she does this too me , I
think she felt my Boner because she pulled out

Her : we can go back I'm ready now "

Fuck I'm horny....I mumbled , I adjusted my pants , she looked at me and shyly looked away ,

She jumped down and fixed her dress , damn Sbahle body is banging , I like how her small tummy
pushes her ass out , that hourglass kind of figure just made my blood hot, it's going to be long night
with her by my side looking like that .....

chapter 42

Sbahle***"

The whole time driving back Mvelo was on his phone , I have noticed that he is a perfectionist and the
orders he was giving made me see that he rules with strict order ... No he was not demanding per say
but he wanted to make sure that everything is ready for us.
Me: I still think you making a fuss about this whole thing "

He side smile and kissed the back of my hand

Him : for you I will bring the moon and sun to your feet "

I blushed and looked down

Him: some one has been asking for you for a while now "

Me : who ?"

I smiled thinking it could be Zee ,

Him : I can't tell you that but can we do Quick stop so you can see for yourself “ I nodded but quickly
reminded our guest

Me : dinner ?"

Him : that can wait ... She is more important "

Me : ok... "

It was not long drive because it was within the royal realms , When we arrived at the venue we did not
go to the main entrance but there was some sort of log cabin at the back of the stretch tent it was
beautiful big house , you know if this people were not rich I will say it's there house but I guess to them
this is just another outdoor cabin nje , my shoes were killing me now and I'm guessing Mvelo notice
because I kept saying
“ ouch … shuuu “ while walking to the door

Without any warning he scooped me up

Me : “ Mvelo ! “

Him : “ you in pain … “ I smiled and rested my head on his shoulder , he placed me down the minute
we entered the cabin and took off my shoes he has an obsession with my feet every time he touch them
he will rub and run his hands gently as if giving me a massage

Him : better? "

I nodded , I walked around the house the inside was more beautiful but way to manly it looked so
warm and cosy , the brown timber and brown leather touch made it look so earthly elegant for an office
environment or jazz bar

Him : when I first got here this was the place I called home … then we upgraded to the palace you saw
when you drove in “

Me ; was the deco always like this ...? "

I frowned no women will live in such a place , he just laughed and shook his head

Him : “ well I made it a men cave after we moved to the new royal house , this is where I escape too
when I feel like the world is weighing me down “

Me : “ like you feeling right now ?“

Her squinted his eyes and cleared his throat I know that his going to act as if he did not hear me ,
Me : “ I will let it slide for now , but I need you to tell me what’s going on before i walk down that aisle
“

Him : why do I feel like you not giving me any choice here Mabhengu "

Me : because as much as we can fight it we are very much connected what I feel you feel and right now
I know something is not right I can see it in your eyes as well"

He kissed my forehead “ I promise I will tell you but first let me show you “

He held my hand and we walked through a long passage till he opened the door ,

The room looked like a hospital ward with machines beeping I notice Sbu seating on the chair next to
the bed , I looked at Mvelo he sniffed his eyes changed he squeezed my waist a little bit hard I did not
move I just took it all in and allowed him take out his pain on me , he then walked past me heading to
the other side of the bed , who ever is their must be really tiny as I can hardly see them from where I
was standing.

I found my feet leading me close to the bed , following Mvelo he set next to a frail beautiful lady laying
lifeless on the bed , she smiled at him , I know this face...

Mvelo : “ hey princess “

She lifted her hand and touched his cheek , she weakly smiled at him

“ where is my Queen “ she asked it came out as a whisper , Mvelo looked down before lifting his head to
look at me , Sbu stood up when he notice my presence ,

Mvelo :” hi sisi … please meet my Queen Sibahle Bhengu … “ he looked at me … I have never Seen him
like this he was broken “ baby come meet my one and only beautiful sister Pamela Nonkwenkwezi
Mnguni Ngcobo “ ooh my God it Pam
Pam : wow did you really have to call out my full names are we in home affairs or something ?

I smiled now I see the attitude I was warned about , she slowly raised her eyes to meet mines and i
smiled I felt like crying I know I have never meet her but I felt like I known her for years , Mvelo talks
about her all the time .

But why did Mvelo not tell me about her condition he just told me that her pregnancy is complicated
and she could not travel that's why she did not attend my Zibizo ceremony in my house , I moved to
where Sbu was seated , she offered me her had and I held it , it was soft and so tiny.

Her: ooh my God you are so beautiful “

Me : “ thank you ... You also beautiful " indeed she is, she maybe sick but her smile , small lips , her
eyes and an afro of curly hair enhanced her beautiful features

Her : ungazo dlala wena ... You should have seen me in my times yooo bengibaba girl "

I laughed , I like her free spirit

Me : I have heard so much about you , I can not believe I'm finally meeting you “

Her : I hope this douchebag told you all nice things about me"

Mvelo laughed " how can I not when you bully me every time you get "

They laughed

Her : “ are you sure you can see kodwa makoti wami those eyes of yours are not normal for a black girl "

They bust out and laughed , while I pouted My whole life I got teased a lot for having small eyes never
thought that my own sister in-law will make fun of me as well and my men will actually laugh at me too
Mvelo : let me leave you two before she tells me she's not marrying me for laughing at her "

Pam : you got it bad bro "

Me and Mvelo chuckled since me and him get the joke

Her : “boys can you give me time to talk to my sister in law , we have a lot to catch up on ...and baby can
you pass my phone “ sbu gave Pam her phone , Mvelo looked at me and I just nodded that he may
leave , he kissed Pam hand and Sbu kissed her forehead , Sbu showed me an emergency button and
told me that Dr and nurse are in the next room , they left leaving me with pam , she smiled at me.

Her : so where do we start since I really don't have much time "

Mvelo ***

“ how is she ? “

I asked Sbu as we set in the lounge ,

“ she is stable … the Dr just confirmed that the baby is restless and she will do a C-section after the
wedding “

I nodded

Him : “ so you and Sbahle you really are doing this ? “

I smiled and nodded

Him : “ look Bro marriage means life time commitment and to be honest I don’t trust Sbahle brothers ,
the way they look at you they waiting for to you to slipup and they will be on your throat “

Me : “ I know “ I set there thinking about Sbahle and the Pink elephant in our relationship that we have
to address ,

Me : “I'm really scared to tell Sbahle about Sli “

He looked at me

Him : “ do you still have unresolved feelings for her ? “

Honestly I don’t , Sli was my first love i was 18 when I fell in love for the first time. It felt like all of the
movies, TV shows, and love songs finally made sense but back of my mind I knew the success rate of
high school relationships was way low and to top it up Sli was older I was 18 she was 27 , I was student,
she was my teacher , she was a widow and I was a fuck boy she was lonely and I was there and shit
happens , both hormones and love’s disorienting effects made me think this could be it.

When me and her parted it felt like a break up I guess I wanted a sense of belonging from her and few
years later, it hit me that the very first person you love is usually just that " the first" I felt stuck in
cynicism and sadness for about a year or so I looked for a girl that has her personality and screwed up
very badly.

Me : nah man I have crossed that bridge she is a good women no doubt but looking at the person I am
now she was just going to be another Becky in my life , a clingy cry baby ...you know i realise that The
notion that love is not eternal is not shocking nor original, so at times i ask myself that why do I still
struggle to grasp it?....well It makes sense intellectually, but how do you accept it emotionally? "

Him : you move on I guess ... You got a good women in that girl and I see her growing up to be a woman
that can tame you "
I chuckled that so true you know I’ve spent the past year thinking about how to let go of a first love, Sli
looked as my forever because I have told myself I will never find another one like her , I was ball of mess
but being around you know fucking around she just remained a memory and after she started to feel
like just another girl I have screwed.

sbu : aish bro she is still link to you via Zee what you going to do about it ?"

Me : I don't know ... Sbahle is young and frankly I don't know how she going to take this "

Him : be honest with her tell her everything trust me I know the importance of honesty when it comes
to women , I kept Sne mother a secret from Pam for years and when I found out that Pam was digging
information about us and why I took full custody of Sne , it almost broke our marriage ... You know why
because I took the child from its mother because of our messy break up that was never resolved and it
almost destroyed my current relationship with your sister "

Me : what ? Pam never told me about this ? "

Him: because she is a wife and Ngcobo marital dispute are locked in our bedroom ... It all start with
talking to each other ... No matter how dark the secrete is , if love is a light there is a way "

I nodded I know that I respect Sbahle enough to keep my distance from Sli but how do I do that when
she is a mother of my child and somehow resent Sbahle for being around in my life instead of her how
are we going to parents to Zee all three of us without biting our heads off

Me :Sli is just another different person this day and dahm she makes me so mad "

He bust our and laughed

Him : “ this might only mean that you outgrown her , face it Mfethu you were young back then she
might have been the best thing to happen in your life then , but values change look at the men you
turned out to be she would have not lasted a month with you but she would have chose to stay because
of Zithelo, she would have agreed to a whole lot of shit that you would have dished up to her and girls
like her are too weak to just walk away and that would have turned you to different men all together "
I clicked my tongue as he laughed at me

, thinking about how it was so easy for me go back and forth between her legs while she knew very
well that I had found interest in Sbahle has proven that she was never in control of this relationship from
the word go but I was.

The door swung open

Me : what going ? " it was Zoe with Veli

Zoe : non of your business " .they walked past us made there way to the kitchen , I heard veli instructing
people to put this here and there, I made my way to the them , I saw few catering guys doing there
thing

Sbu : and then ?

Veli : Pam can sure order me around on that bed , I only had few hour's to do this " she breath out
loud and held her waist

Sbu : what going on ? "

Veli : last minute bridal shower "

Me : what ? " ....

Zoe : bye boys .... " she pushed us out as we passed more girls coming in , she closed the door on our
face

I looked at Sbu who was about to explode

Me : hay don't look at me like that .... your wife did this "

to be continued ..... unedited I'm still typing with my phone my laptop has corona virus

chapter 43

Sbahle ***

I heard noise outside my room or should I say Mvelo room in the penthouse it's already morning its my
wedding day Bitches , but I feel the weight of the world on my shoulder pushing me down I'm debating
if I should get out of bed or not , my head was pounding my throat so dry .

I turned around and looked at time it was 04:30 am in the morning it’s my wedding day and I have bags
under my eyes due to not sleeping , I cried so much last night and Pam being Pam made me laugh it out
by hosting my surprise bridal shower it was nothing big but I was grateful for all the gifts I got and
hanging around with crazy girls I wish that I was a drinker maybe just maybe I would have forgotten the
talk I had with Pam early.

But when I got back to the hotel I was filled with mixed emotions that I ended up having an insomnia ,i
cried so much I don’t even want to look at myself in the mirror right now... My mom thought it was
wedding jitters or me having cold feet but if only she knew.

Mvelo on the other hand was blowing up my phone non stop I don't even know when he stop , he was
worried sick about me but I assured him that I’m ok ,
“ Sbahle you're heart is heaving I'm even getting chest pain and you sniffing I’m coming there right now
!!“

I could not let him abandon his friends that had decided to throw him a bachelor party this was my
budded that I needed to deal with headstrong and alone , besides he was the last person I wanted to be
with from what Pam told me about him and his baby mama I just needed space to digest everything.
Am I ok now ? On this very same day of my wedding ? Not by a long shot but I kept my promise to go
ahead with this wedding no matter what

So here I am looking at myself in mirror it's The morning of my wedding its a special and highly
emotional time for everyone accept me the bride Not only is it the last morning I will have as an
unmarried person, it’s also a small window for me to pack all my belongings , check everything is in
order with my Membeso ceremony and get to the ceremony in good time. An array of emotions just
surface, and each one i debated if I should honour as I prepare to start my new life.

With all the hair and make-up to perfect, time-keeping and last minute preparations, mom told me its
normal to feel a bit disoriented few hours before the ceremony , she saw right through me that I'm not
ok , but again she still believed that its jitters.

" why your eyes so red " Mlondi asked

" just missing dad " I lied I knew he was not going to ask me further he hugged me and told me he is
proud of me .

The drive to the Mnguni palace Everything just seem a bit unreal – the big day is finally here! I'm trying
so hard to handle the confusion by staying grounded I take a moment to have a cup of tea but can't
stomach anything , I'm nervous , excited and shit terrified.

I can't believe that everything was planned for me yes Veli did an outstanding work looking at the deco
and my outfits but i still feel some kind of a way because not once was I asked what I like or don't my
point of view was not considered...but I doubt any wife's point of view matter when the marriage is
arranged . Apparently Mvelo wanted to do the whole wedding in one day and tomorrow we suppose to
go on our honeymoon , I don’t know what’s the rush was but his the king and his word is final.
My traditional wedding was a white and African print theme , people came out in number to attend this
wedding and to celebrate with me I was tired of smiling and waving , Mvelo on the other hand was over
the moon it was good to see him like this but i had a lot on my mind to be in that happy place with him
one look at Pam's kids and Sbu I felt tears building up in my eyes , My body was there but my mind was
miles away,

If anyone told me about how sincere a person dying wish list is I would have not listened to Pam , I
would most probably have said that

“I’m too young to fulfil a dying person wish “

yesterday events started played in my head like tape recorder on repeat , Pam really poured out her
heart to me , it was our first time meeting each other but she already knew what to say to me and what
is expected of me in this family

“ Sibahle I know that you young but if you marry Mvelo you not only marrying him but you marrying his
family his people his entire life as well I may not live long to be there for him or my family but I trust you
will be there I know that you love him , I see it in your eyes and in the way he looks at you , Our family is
a circle of strength of love Sbahle with every birth and every union the circle grows … keep my family
safe from harm's way make the royal house feel worm … never ever make my kids see that there is
something missing … they are young they will soon call you mom teach them about love ….make them
know that Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not
dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does
not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always
perseveres. Love never fails…. Teach them about faith show them how to pray make them fear God “

When she spoke about her children her face will light up , she told me that when she says her children
Zithelo is included and I must never make her feel like an outsider she may not be my biological child but
If I love her father I need to love her unconditionally too.

As I sit here looking at happy faces, feasting drinking , singing and all the speech and gift offering , I fake
a smile I’m carrying Pam's weight on my shoulder , she expected a lot from me , she trusted me with a
lot of things am I even ready for such responsible ? but yet again I think Pam left me with no choice ,
she was not pleading or bagging me , she had this planned for months now she gave me instruction on
how to run this house when she is gone , you know If granting the dying person's last wish will help
appease her mind while dying, then it should be done regardless of me being ready or not , I can not go
ageist the promise I made it's important for Pam to let go of all worldly attachments to rest in peace ,
and I pray to god that she does not die but her mind is made up she told me she is tired she told she
knows her fate and I must not cry for her but rejoice the life she has left for me.

Him : “ Sthandwa sami ukahle ?" I wiped a tear on my eyes , and smiled He held my hand we were
seated on the throne seat I was crowned his Queen and Him my King he was holding my hand I felt
powerful the seat was mine its a feeling I can't explain but I could not sit and enjoy it reign as I was a ball
of emotions, have you ever meet a person for two seconds in your life but had this undistinguished
bond with them like you have known each other for years that me and Pam.

Me : “ I just need to use the ladies room please “

Austin walked to us

Austin : the garden is ready for the royal white wedding ... "

Him : we need to get ready "

I nodded I hate this I have change my outfit for trillion times now since this morning and no doubt I'm
tired , Mvelo has tendencies of leaving people he invited behind to do his own thing , the same thing he
did last night he will do today , our white wedding is an intimate ceremony with only family members
and few close friends , the royal garden is a sacred place and not everyone is allowed there.

He kissed my cheek a girl that was appointed as my ward escorted me to one of the guest room I was
followed by my makeup artist , hairstylist and my designer with lot of guards .

You may ask yourself why I'm not using the main bedroom ? well tradition says that I can only go to the
main Bedroom after my wedding festivity , we still had a white wedding something to do with blood
moon that will bless our union , and I thought that amaZulu are traditional but Mvelo's family is worse …
it's tradition this … tradition that …yoo it's too much.

My ward asked me if I needed anything the minute I walked inside the room , I shook my head No
Me : “ can you leave me please “

She bowed “ yes her majesty “ she told everyone to wait outside thank God I can finally breathe, I can
never get used being called ' my Queen , my Lady , her Majesty , 'but I guess it is what it is , I took off my
shoes and threw myself on the bed I was woken up by massive cramps on my abdomen I tossed and
turned when I opened my eyes I was on my wedding dress I felt something wet when I looked down I
was soaked in blood , I tried to stand but the pain was to much , I screamed till I felt hands shaking me I
shoot my eyes open and they landed on Pam , she was carrying a baby , she walked to me and placed it
on my arms

Her : “ her name is Naledi … take care of her “

I looked at her she was glowing she was beautiful and looked healthy

Her : “ I have to go my Queen I love you so much ...I'm with you in spirit “

I called out her name when I shoot my eyes open I found Mvelo looking at me , his eyes were bloodshot

He did not say a word to me but engulfed me in a hug , I cried my lungs out as he brushed my back I
could feel my shoulder getting wet he was also crying …

To be continued

chapter 44

.
.

unedited

Mvelo ****

I could not shake the feeling that Sbahle was not well , one of her servants rushed to me and told me
that she is crying in her sleep I rushed to her room and found her shaking as if she is having a seizure her
eyes turned back and only a white part was showing , Makhumalo walked in and took Sbahle left hand ,
and she inserted goatskin wrist band and some red and white beads ,

Makhumalo : we don't have enough time you need to wake her up “

I nodded , she left the room I held her hand and I saw her dream I was there the pain she felt it looked
and felt so real, when she finally woke up her tears just gushed down I pulled her into a hug I hate Pam
for telling Sbahle about her being sick not only that but her throwing in the towel , When one hears the
word cancer, it can elicit a variety of reactions. Personally, the only word that struck a deeper chord was
hearing the word “terminal.” To be told that even today with all this modern medicine the world has to
offer , it is the saddest of realities that people still do die from cancer. It did not make me any more
prepared for what the actuality of that statement truly meant. As she continued living life despite the
looming diagnosis of terminal hanging over her, till came the day when she was to tired to fight , she
didn't want to be alive and to feel pain anymore, she was just fucken half-dead- alive and I could not do
shit about it .. I'm haunted by our past memory and the future we planned together , This was almost a
pre-grief, seeing her in that bed , A sadness that we knew would befall those closest to her, due to the
fact that we knew she was going to lose her life. How and when it will that happened we had no idea
but prayed for a miracle , The advice that was given was to fight and Try our best to enjoy the time we
had with her . To try and stave off the grief until she was really gone.

This morning My sister did not feel like waking up , she said she was tired she told Sbu to enjoy the
wedding she had few minutes chat with Sbahle and hugged her children dearly , she requested to go to
hospital , She was in pain and blamed it for not resting last night .. she was happy she looked better
then she was days back , due to my wedding taking place she made me promise to visit her once me and
Sbahle are husband and wife , Pam's word is always finale she is stubborn and hotheaded I could not
disagree with her even if I could .
Sbahle : I hurts so bad Mvelo “

Me : “ I know baby … “

Her : “ I need to see her “

I just held her tight I broke down and cry , fuck the statement that man don’t cry , we talking about my
one and only sister here we had our upside down fought like any other siblings but she has been the
only person that was holding it down for me for years , she was a parent to me , I am who I am today
because of her how do I continue? how do i go on ,it was quite complex situate, We are facing losing a
sister and a daughter within our family that had been beyond close to each and every one of us but was
not quite shattered since cancer had come into our lives. The structure of our family had shifted and
changed as each of us has coped drastically differently as time unfolded. So how do I cope stay in this
place , how do i look at Sbahle and tell her everything will be ok ,while I don't know if I'm coming or
going , I'm walking around an open bleeding heart.. what do I do where I see that there might be no
future for my sister and it feels like there’s no future for anyone, in this house without her really? How
do i put my clothes on in the morning and look in the mirror without screaming? How do i show up to
her kids, when it feels like I'm dying inside? How do i keep pretending, keep tolerating the blindness of
everyone and everything around me "

“ Ngonyama and Ndlonkulu … we are ready for you “

It was my grandmother I slowly untangle myself from my wife arms

Me : baby ... We need to do this now"

She looked at me as if i'm crazy

Her : “ what … we cant I need to go to the hospital right now !! “

I just looked down

Koko : “ Ndlonkulu … Nokwenkwezi is fine , I just finished talking to Sbu and he told me she in surgery
as we speak , the baby was restless so they doing a C-section “

Me : “ Sthandwa sami … we need to get married “ as much as we traditionally married it is important

that we have this white wedding the ceremony need be blessed and legally I need Sbahle to be my wife ,
I wiped her tears as she jumped off the bed

Her ; No!"

Me : baby calm down please "

Her : calm down ....Mvelo where is Pam....??"

Me : baby the wedding ... " I knew the importance of me and Sbahle sealing our Union under the blood
moon by tradition this needs to happen as well

Her : “ that all you worried about Mvelo … this wedding Pam is fighting for her life and you busy
forcing this marriage into my throat !!! “

I stood up and look at her

Me : “ SHE IS MY SISTER SBAHLE DON’T YOU THINK I KNOW THAT !!”

Her : “ooh finally you realise ! … wedding or no wedding she still fighting for her life and from what I
whiteness that baby needs me than those people outside that I have to smile at and pretend that I’m
ok ! “

Koko looked at me and I looked at Sbashe … she was angry fuming I had no come back I just froze , she
put on her sleepers and walk pass me I held her hand we looked at each other , she did not blink or
look down
Her : “ Sbu is alone in that hospital Mvelo he needs us “ the way this women holds my balls I just
swallowed hard and nodded

Me : “ will use the back door .. “

Koko: Mvelo … the if you do not do this now ….your ancestors will not bless you union … “

Me : “ its risk I’m willing to take , family comes first koko … tell Zoe and Austin they will know what to
do with all people outside“ I looked at Sbahle “ lets go “

I asked one of the guards to escort us out , the royal house was still buzzing and it took forever to leave
the premises Sbahle looked at her wrist band and looked outside the window her sniffs were evidence
that she was crying ,

Sbahle ***

I’m glad that they booked the whole floor for Pam in this hospital because it was mass , the minute we
walked in we heard Sbu screaming the machines were going wild

Sbu : No .. no .. no come back to me you promised you will never leave me ,!! PAMMMMMM! …. Dr do
something , !!! “

I just saw that one line going of and I looked at every one in the room and I just held my mouth ….
Mvelo just sank down

Sbu : “ how am I suppose to raise our children on my own ... please .. please Dr do something please ....”
Beeeeep ... beep beep the machines went off
“ I’m sorry Mr. Ngcobo time of death ....“ I just held my chest I could not hold it in any more so i rushed
out and held my head I screamed and cried but not as much as Sbu and Mvelo , I have seen men cry
before but what was happening right now I could not take it in anymore my first thought was to go to
Mvelo and comfort him one of us need to strong.

I heard a baby crying and it alarmed me that it must be baby Naledi , I wiped my tears and followed the
sound , Wires, tubes, and monitors are being juggled between half a dozen nurses , In the middle of it
all is a tiny, fragile baby, born too soon , a baby who shouldn’t be alive but survived due to her
mother's bravery,

the Nurse’s look at me with eyes full of sorrow and pity but they quickly smiled ,

Me : “ may I come in “

One of them smiled and nodded , Naledi was in NICU she is 17 weeks premature I didn’t get to hold her
but was told to sanitize my hands , I looked at her through the glass , my little fighter … the lone
survivor, I sat on a special chair, tears welling up in my eyes , Excitement, fear and anxiety consumed
me all at one ,

she was beautiful she a premature baby she was skinny and all wrinkled up , seeing a baby for the first
time takes on a new meaning . The constant beeps and alarms hum through the dimly lit room. she
looked like Pam , the nurse gave me her bottle and she sucked it for her dear life I smiled I had a
purpose now ...

A week later

**** sorry about crop top ***

chapter 45

.
***unedited ***

Two weeks later

Sbahle ***

My alarm went off i turned around and was welcomed by an empty bed and noticed that I was alone yet
again , this days I go to bed alone every night I feel him holding me at night and when I wake up his not
there, my husband is grieving alone and I don't know how to get through to him ,I am trying the best I
can to take over some of the work my husband had done so he can have time to grieve. I don't know if I
should encourage or push him to jump back into work not that I know where he goes off to everyday
but I know its not work .

I just don't know what to do, but I want to do whatever is best for him I never knew that love comes
with so much compromise I have put Mvelo before my needs.

How do I help him grieve? How do I help him still run our business our house ? How do I make sure he
doesn't fall into a depression? He does not talk to me I know I can not detect how he must grieve or not
but I feel like this silence is causing detachment between us

" have patience my child " my mom will say when I cry to her in the wee hours

Mom : Your partner will return. The grief will integrate into his life and psyche, and be less of an
overwhelming force that shrouds each day. Grief doesn’t ever go away; however, it does subside, and
your partner’s “normal” personality will come back be patient Sbahle ... Kuyabekezelwa emshadweni
your husband needs you now "

I just wish he could tell me how he feels cry if he had too but he us just plain ignoring me as if I don't
exist

the last time we spoke was the day of Pam's funeral ,

" please wear this "

I looked at it it was a big diamond rock , my wedding ring I expected a hug a smile even a kiss but he
walked past me

Me : Mvelo..." I called out for him he stopped but did not turn he breath out loud and continued to walk
away , taking a chuck of my heart with him.

, we hold hands in front of cameras and take pics for the media to write a perfect story about us but
inside this house we strangers , I miss Mvelo no doubt and this house is just to crowded for us to talk or
have a one on one conversations.

" you need to give him his cake " Zoe said

Me : I can't we still in moaning " I lied through my teeth I'm know Jack about sex and mvelo is big I don't
think I'm ready for his thinking inside me ... That does not mean I will refuse him if he wants his cake
either.

I had hope that since I woke up early today I will find him in our bed I rushed to his study but he was
gone , I sigh and made myself coffee , I heard chatter on the other room

" ooh God I'm so late ...the king will skin me alive ... His coffee is not done "

Another voice : you better thank your God because the king left early today "

" are you sure ...? I'm even scared to walk in " I heard shuffling and two of servants walk in , shock was
written all over their face when they saw me

they bowed " Ndlovukazi "

I nodded " can you not cook breakfast today I will do it "
" Ndlovukazi " they bowed and walked out , the tension in this house even got our servant walking on
eggshells because of Mvelo I hear them talk about his temper and that makes me so mad but I have
never whiteness it myself .

We all gathered on the dining room , koko , the kids and Veli a lot was said but no one opens there
mouth.

Sne : Aunti are we still going to see baba today ?"

I wish I could say yes but Sbu is a different person and I don't want his kids to see him like that , he hates
Naledi and blames her for taking his wife , we have exchange hateful words me and him and I decided
not to attend Pam's funeral it happened that the very same day of the funeral Naledi was being
discharged

Sbu wanted his wife close to him and the funeral was held in Durban. Somehow I had hoped Mvelo will
asked me to go but he just walked away , the tears I have cried for this man can flood rivers now , my
spirit were lifted up I finally held Naledi in my arms and came back with her home , they call her
Simangaliso because after 2 day in an incubator she was all alive and out of danger.

She is my smile keeper I still have a lot to learn about baby's but the Nanny I hired is great help and I'm
getting there .

After breakfast the kids went to there playroom and I took Naledi to my room I read my book rocking
my baby till she fell asleep , I looked at the beautiful view outside thinking about my life and married
how did it get to this ?

You know I wish had a chance to prepare for it, but just one horrible day changed my husband to a man
I don't recognise , the love of my life lost a parent, sibling, and friend. As i go trough journey in time that
looked like it was not moving I wish I could hold his hand and tell him I'm here for him .

I have taken all in and tackled the silent abuse , it even feels like i'm going through a course of
surviving being a wife , a queen a mother to his kids and his shoulder to cry on this are true trying times
for me .
" if its not working out buya uze'ekhaya " Nsika will say

" if he ever makes you cry I swear to God he will meet his sister sooner than he thinks " Mlondi will say

Decision ...decision ... Do I stay do I go ? Does he still love me ? He does not even touch you what do you
think ?

My marriage life is dead with no life I feel like I'm losing my mind but at least I have found my own
personal coping mechanisms, the kids give me a reason to smile everyday and remind me why I'm in this
house.

Its afternoon and without fail I must take my afternoon walk.

after jumping out of the shower I jumped into my long black body hugging dress and black and white
head scarf , first thing first I make my way yo Naledi nursery , she was still sleeping

I kissed her forehead and walk out.

I made my way down stairs , I heard Zee and Junior ( Pam son) talking there the are the same age
group, and there stories always get me laughing like crazy , they were seated on the couch watching
cartoons , the house was quite I wander where everyone was.

They noticed my presence

" Aunty " I kissed them on the cheeks and hugged them ,

" have you eaten "they shook their heads I smiled

Me : what do you want to eat ?"

" kellogs and eggs " Jr said I giggled

Me : and you zee " she giggled

" I don't know ...maybe cake " I laughed

Me : ooh my... why cake Princess "

Zee : because it sweet ..." I laughed

Me : come let's go make you food "

I would not say I have the best of relationship with Zee or Pam's kids it's only been a two week with
them but they are good kids no doubt Pam was a good mother

"Ooh I'm sorry I didn't know you up "

I looked up and she smiled

" kids come eat I made you lunch "

What the fuck !!

Zee : thank you mommy " zee let go of my hand ran to her and she hugged her , I was frozen what is
she doing here in my house and in my kitchen the devil is testing me

"Silindile !"

"_Ndlovukazi " she said bowing her head , I looked at her from head to toe she was wearing high
waisted grey skinny jean with pink shirt tucked in and killer hills , she tossed her weave back
Me : go and eat I'm coming I said to the kids " I smiled and when they were out of site my eyes locked
with hers and my smile disappeared

" you were in my kitchen ?"

" with all due respect you were still sleeping "

I laughed

" what does that suppose to mean? " I asked

Her : I found my child all alone and you were sleeping so as a mother I took it upon Me to make her food
"

" you do know that this kids have a Nanny right ?"

" it's only lunch Sibahle what's the big deal ? "

Me : its my kitchen Makazithelo as a wife of this house yimi angi shaya u5 lapha siyezwana "

Her : I just thought ..." I cut her off

Me: ufunani LA ? "

I was mad ever since I knew about sli she has done this small things that rub me the wrong way and it
did not help that she is Mvelo business partner and Veli's bff

Her : wow Trey is the father of my child so I came to check up on Zee "

Me : so you come and go in my house ?"

She side smile , ooh help me god I'm about to catch a case

Me : you not answering me ... Ngingakusiza ngani Kwami ! "

She set on the couch opposite me and folded her legs did I say she mast sit down ?

Her : I'm sorry Ndlovukazi to step in your shoes , I'm actually here on business I was hoping to speak to
Trey as well" ooh my God what !! This woman is driving me crazy not only must I tolerate Mvelo silent
treatment and now his baby mama is walking all up in the very same house I leave in

Me : what stopping you from calling him ? Nawe uyazibonela akekho "

Her : we spoke at Pam's funeral about Zee ..." She was talking alone now I was still at that point when
she said ' we spoke at Pam's funeral ', I was annoyed and I don't know what game this woman was
playing or what my husband is still doing with her ...

Veli walked in she frowned noticing Sli

Veli : ooh I thought you said will meet at the restaurant "

Sli : I was in the neighborhood so here I am " they hugged and talked like I was not even there .

Me : wow " I laughed and shook my head Pam did tell me that no matter what I do I must never get to
close with Veli now I see why here loyalties are with Sli

Me : I'm sorry ladies I got Royal duties to do so can you take this chit chat outside my house .... "

Koko walked in she did not have to say a word but her eyes said a lot , after we all greeting her they said
goodbye to koko and walked out giggling and talking
I felt sick ,

" Sibahle " she stopped me as I was about to walk out

Me : koko"

Her : hold your head up high...dark clouds are closing in "

Again she talked in riddle I just nodded and walked to my room I felt the walls closing in this room , this
is not happening to me No ! did I really Marry into this chaos? Why because of love ... Fuck sli will be
involved in our life for at least another 11 years will she be this pain , will i control my cool around her ?
Why do I feel like she still got this hold over Mvelo ...I felt like I was suffocating , Mvelo can't do this to
me ... I took my laptop I keep thinking of accepting to enroll in I UCT maybe it's best me and mveli
separate a bit .

This is his problem, not mine let him figure it out, he is old enough to make babies, so he should be old
enough to figure out how to handle his ex's. I'm too found for this drama.

I took pain tablets and I was off to lala land

I must have doze off because I was woken by eyes looking at me I try to shake the feeling but shoot my
eyes open he was sitting in the dark and looking at me , I looked at the time it was after midnight , I
have seen him happy , sad , disappointed but this eyes I have never seen ?

Him : you enrolled in UCT?"

I set up straight I wanted to find words to say but his look scared me I found myself looking down

He stood up taking of his shirt

" Awuyi lapho ...Siyezwana ( you not going there do you hear me ) " I didn't say anything I just looked at
him his back was facing me
Him : siyezwana !!" I nodded but realised that he did not see me

" yebo " he walked out and I pulled my knees to my chest , placed my hand on my mouth and cried

Honeymoon faze ipheli

chapter 46

Sbahle ***

I was tired of crying and questioning myself where I went wrong , I wiped my tears and set up straight

I heard the shower running and I made my way downstairs , I checked on the microwave and yes his
plate is still there I warmed it up sniffing and hugging myself , its time I put myself together Mvelo has to
much control over me and I don’t like the women his turning me into .

" hi " I looked up I was meet with uncle Mzamo gaze , he was still on his formal work clothes I'm
guessing he just got back from the UK , he frowned I guess he saw my red nose and baggy eyes, you
know that look of sleeping with a broken heart that how my face looks right now

Him : you can't sleep "

I looked down

Me : yes something like that " I sniffed

Him : mmmm"

I sniffed again

Him : Sbahle are you ok ? "

Me : yes I just have blocked nose "

Save by the bell the microwave beeps and I quickly attended to it

Me : can I dish up for you ?"

Him : no thank ... "

I took Mvelo plate placed it on a tray all along I was moving around and his Uncle was just looking at me
, this man aura is so not settling , I was about to go and say goodnight to him but he decided to talk

Him : Sbahle ... You may be a Mnguni now because of that ring on your finger but remember that your
blood is Bhengu never allow a man to take your identity of who you are ..."

I looked at him and he looked at me , I nodded

Me : thank you Malume , goodnight "

Him : mmmm tell your husband that he must meet me in his study in 10 minutes "

I nodded again and made my way to our room I placed his food on the side table he came out with only
a white towel wrapped in his waist he was drying his hair with another towel I looked at him longer than
normal , I still can't get used to how hot and ripped up his body is I only moved my eyes when his towel
rose up oh shit is that an erection I swiftly moved to the closet

Me : uncle Mzamo wish to speak with you in your study "

I made my way to the closet and took out his pajama pants , his white T-shirt was far and I could not
reach the top shelf I tip toed

Me : damit ... "

I felt him behind me Instead of him taking his T-shirt from the top shelf he lifted me up ,I got it and he
placed me down

Me : thank you "

I was looked down facing him will kill me even more , I could tell his eyeing me but not today we not
doing it today , I went to the bathroom picked up his clothes that were scattered on the floor and
shoved them in the laundry basket when I turned he was standing by the door looking at me , his still
walking around half naked and I don’t trust my body around him at all , fuck the silent in this room was
getting into me he was blocking the way and I wanted to past I wasn't going to allow him to see me
breaking down or filling vulnerable under his mystic look, I pushed past him

Him : Mabhengu "

He called out but I was not doing this with him I slammed the bathroom door on his face and locked it I
took off my dress and thought about long bubble bath but I was to drained , shower it was then .

I was crying my last tears under this pouring water two weeks I have not seen him , talk to him and
when he opens his mouth today he tells me shit , God knows I love Mvelo but loving him it's so
exhausting I'm tired , after taking a shower I made my way to the closet I jumped into my bum short PJ
and matching vest good he's not here and he took his food I breath out loud and jumped under covers ,
I remembered Pam's words "when it gets too much Pray baby , I know my brother his difficult person
to be with he loves you but don't cry never show him you weak because he will walk all over you ...
Always pray asked God to give you strength ". I got down on my knees and Prayed
.

Mvelo***

“ I need you back at work “

I looked at him as if his crazy

Him : “ tomorrow we doing a cleansing ceremony and you are going back to the UK “

Me : “ what do you mean I’m going to the UK … AS IN ALONE! “

Him : “ you self centered and you putting yourself first so go and figure out if you still want to be
married to that girl or rather be alone “

Me : “ so is this about MY wife ? “

Him : “ last time I checked she was the only one holding this house together if you cared you would
have noticed “

I looked down I just got married but I feel like I just attended my funeral , I’m scared to love Sbahle the
way she deserve, God Knows I love my wife and I hate that I’m the cause of her tears

Me : “it's just hard to let go off of pam I feel like I have lost my best friend I feel like I have no point to
leave “

Him : “ we all feel like that but ask yourself if Pam was here would she have wanted you to be like this ?
“

I just looked down

Him : I want Sbahle to take over Pam’s project ? “

Me : “ she wanted to builds that Business with Sbu “

Him : “ it will take years for Sbu to be back on his feet losing a soulmate is not easy … so you have to talk
to her about going back to school you can not make her your house wife , she’s too young for this
responsibility you have placed on her shoulders “

I just nodded

After we talked about how bad of a husband I was , he gave me mouth full about work and reshuffling
that need to happen , it was official I’m going back to work this man was not taking no for an answer , I
finally went to bed after 3:00am and he told me he is going for a Jog my uncle never sleep , I walked in
my bedroom and I looked at my beautiful wife , God Knows will never cheat on her , but I just can not be
happy when I feel so empty , I don’t want to fight with her or shout at her so I just avoid her , I have
been looking at her every move from afar , the walks she takes every day , I bugged her Pc and phone , I
have cried with her when she cried but I was just not there to hold her hand or talk to her ,she the only
normal thing in my life , the way she has taken a role of being mother to my kids I could have not asked
for any better women than her , she is humble and dedicated to her royal duties the people love her
and I like that she is hands on whatever my grandmother throws at her . I got under the cover and
pulled her close to me I love how she smells it's so fruity , I kissed her neck I could feel her trying to push
me but I held her tighter , she is my harmony

Sbahle ***

I felt his hands pulling me to him , he smelled of alcohol and toothpaste , I wanted to untangle myself
because he was suffocating me ,

We never speak to each other no kiss but every night he will creep in my life and hold me for his dear
life , he was holding me even tighter tonight , there was a lot I wanted to tell him right now but I just
could not , felt him breathing heavily and I knew he was fast asleep , I held his hand and breath out loud

Me : " Laying in bed, in our bed, without you still proves to be an excruciating thing even with you in it ,
There isn’t one night that I don’t cry myself to sleep from pure loneliness. There isn’t one morning that I
haven’t rolled over expecting to feel your warm body next to mine. I spent the first two weeks of our
marriage lost without you after losing you to grief ,I would sometimes sleep on the couch because the
thought of being in a bed was too unimaginable. I wouldn’t even briefly lay down on it, wouldn’t sit on it
to tie my shoes. Even now, that I have forced myself to try to get some sleep in an actual bed in your
arms I can’t bring myself to go lay down until I am thoroughly exhausted and I know that sleep is
imminent. It’s a strange concept of almost being afraid of your own bed because I fear that one day you
may not come back or hold me like you do , because that the only time I get feel that I have husband
that comes in the night and hold me tight and leave But aside from the torture of the actual bed, its you
being physically here but not here at all , I miss you Mvelo “

I don’t Know when sleep came but I was woken up sun heating my face , I scoffed and rolled over but
bumped into Mvelo , I shoot my eyes open I was meet by his dreamy eyes looking at me wait am I
dreaming ?

To be continued …

chapter 47
.

.unedited

Sbahle ***

He looked at me and yes its him his alive he is really here with me in my bad , he smiled at me and I
don't know what got over me but I slapped him

Him : what the fuck "

I jumped on him and I hit him I was mad

" Sbahle ... Babe ... Stop it ..." I was on top of him and I was just punching him

" him ... I'm sorry... Baby I'm sorry "

I was crying I was mad

Me : I hate you !! "

Him : I know ... I know ...fuck baby my eye "

He held both of my arms and flipped me over , he pinned my hands above my had he was holding them
with his one Hand and the other was on his eye , the fight in me did not care I was trying to untangle
myself from his hold

Me : fucken let go of me ... Fuck you Mvelo yezwa .." I was twisting my legs till I felt his body weight on
top of me

Him : I'm sorry ... I'm sorry " I felt his wet lips on my neck
Me : get off me !!!..."

Him : mmm " he just kept on leaving wet kisses on my neck

Me : I hate you .. Uyezw!!"

Him : I love you too ... " his voice on my ear made my body betray me

Him : ngiyaxolisa Hle..hle .. " he looked at me I did a number on him his eye was red he had a cut on his
cheek and his face was red

Him : Mabhengu "

I shook my head I hate that I love him like this ,

Him : babe . . . it me "

I still did not look at him

Him : hle-hle please "

Shit this tears are building up fuck

Him : shuu baby don't cry ...I'm here " he started kissing my tears away the feeling of his mouth on my
wet face made me realise how much I miss him , I felt his lips on mine I missed him ...I love him and he
feels like home his boner was Pocking me I didn't care I was holding on to his face he was exploring my
body with his hands , he cupped my breast and he moaned

Him : I love you ..."

Me : mmm" his top was off and i just could not control my moans and the way his kiss and touch was
taking me places

"Daddy !...."

Me : ooh shoot "

He Pulled down my top that was almost out of my head

Him : Princess !"

He got off me and Zee jumped on him and landed on his bulge

" ooh...fuc...."

Me :fat cook !!!! " I said fast before he cursed

He closed his eyes in pain and I laughed

Him : I swear to God the women in my life are going to kill me today "

I bust out and laughed Zee was on top of his father chest

Him : how are you doing princess "

She giggled This child here has the most amazing spirit ever .. I Decided to take my phone and take a
pic this was a beautiful pic , he pulled me to him
And took my phone and we took selfies off the three of us

" where you going "

Me : I need to bath and check on Naledi "

Him : we can do that together "

I pointed at Zee with my eyes

He gave Zee my phone

Him : baby play game here ...My Queen needs a bath "

Zee : I nerd a bath too " I laughed his hands were moving up and down my back and will land on my ass

Him : I'll bath her and bath you princess "

Zee shook his head

Him : baby you killing daddy's mood " he squeezed my ass and looked at me , Zee giggled and was just
happy that his spending time with her dad , I jumped off the bed I walked to the bathroom , my bum
showed him left him with no imagination at all everything was out there for show and I owned my walk ,

when I turned he to look at him he was biting his lower lip I wink at him and ran into the bathroom ,

.
I was done dressing up and made my way to Naledi room , I found Mvelo rocking her to sleep I stood by
door and smiled , he gently placed her down and when he turned I round he saw me

Him : she is so big "

I smiled

I made my way to the baby court and looked at Naledi she was sucking on her hands

Mvelo held me from behind " thank you " I rested my head on his chest

Him : damn I missed you "

I turned around and looked at him

Me : I was right here "

He smiled as he slowly took my mouth to his

Veli ***

He is on top of me again his been on it even longer than normal I want to touch him but he refusing , his
hitting places I have never thought existed , I'm screaming his holding my mouth his good and he knows
this , his moans feel me up I feel another explosion Coming ooh Bawo I splash my juices on him he hit it
even hard on making my eyes roll back , his not giving me time to recover , his close and he give me a
last kick and realise , he let go of my mouth and my hands , he gets off me and took off his condom

Him : go to your room and call someone to clean this ," he disappear to the bathroom as I take my
soaking pussy out it all started when I told him I love him and he said ok , I though if I give him a baby he
will change but

he told me he don't want a baby but I fell pregnant , I miscarriage and that was the last time he smiled
at me or did something nice to me ,

he changed and only fuckes me without giving a shit about me , I looked at how Mvelo and Sbahle look
at each other and I hate love why must all man use me like this , I wish Mzamo can love me , his my only
ticket to a better life ,

He walks in and look at Mvelo , the queen mother looks happy today , and this are more noisy today
than normal this is perfect family breakfast , I wish I had a ring on to call my self family too

Mzamo : what happened to you ?" He asked Mvelo

Mvelo looked at Sbahle and they had a mini joke session , I was here but was not here my phone buzzed

"Im on my way is he gone ? "

" no . . . I think they resolved things "

" what ?... Did you talk to Mzamo "

I wanted to shake my head but realised that I'm on a phone with her ,

"Sly I'm still trying "

" ooh come on Veli ... If she falls pregnant its over for us , remember that Pam wanted you out of that
royal house and that girl ... Is not going to want you there you not there family but just a girl who was a
victim that they saved..."

I looked at Sbahle she does not like me I have seen that and she is royalty what ever word she say they
will obey , I need Sli to be a second wife she will have my back even if it means that I need to give
Mzamo pussy everyday till he falls in love with me and do what ask him to do .

To be continued *** crop top **"

chapter -49

unedited

Sbahle ***

Dinner was good and Mvelo was talking but my head was miles away I was listening to my lady part
twitch and at some point I just wanted to put my hand down there , I look at his dreamy eyes as if his
got contact lances his pink mouth , his skin so clean his beard so perfectly shaved , his white set of teeth
, I was fucked up horny , I can not still believe even today that this God of a man is mine , sex was a
difficult topic that my mother failed to talk to me about on my wedding day she just said " indoda
kumele idle Sibahle ... Never say you not in the mood ... He is the man and will teach you on how to be a
women in the bedroom ... Trust him and as a wife feed his appetite " there was a lot I wanted to ask by
that that how do I know he will love his food ? those he want it hot or warm ?

Him : sithandwa sami "

He held my hand

Him : you miles away what's up ?"

I looked at him damn this man is Hot

Me : Sex how do you like it"

He chocked on his drink and started coughing yini? Did I say something wrong ?

Him : what ? "

I shrunk my shoulders , I want to know his been lusting over me I can see it in his eyes but always stop
himself from taking it far and with Pam's death that also caused a void between us , there was no
wedding night sex or staining of a sheet ceremony held boy was I glad that did not happened its so
humiliating and degrading for a women while man boost up there egos waving a stained sheet for every
one to see that he just deflowered his wife.

I wish we have already done the deed and I know how it feels the suspense is killing me and it does not
help that right now a have Victoria waterfalls between my legs , feeling awfully horny - so horny it is
making me do stupid things I even think about touching myself ,

I am very conflicted about taking the first step in losing my virginity. As much as I would like for him to
have sex with me to relieve me of all the hormones raging wildly inside I also want to experience making
love for the first time.

My mind is making me feel extremely guilty that I should not be thinking of doing any of these things
but Mvelo awaken thing inside of me , my mind travel back to this morning when he cupped my breath
oooh father God that felt so good also when his hands moved to my inner thigh this afternoon and

on his office when lifted me up grabbed my ass and roughly kissed me shit ...I felt my self getting more
wet ... This is not me I never felt like this ever what is he doing to me .
I blame him for making think and act like a bietch, Perhaps this is because I am brought up in a rather
conservative environment where sex is a taboo subject. Any small controversy about anything related to
sex blows up and becomes a nationwide topic. In my social circles, sex is either never spoken about or
often made fun off usually so when I hang out with my best friend Zim, My family never discuss sex with
me, and when they do, they always warn always to be careful when going out or around guys and often
imply that i should not have "sexual intercourse" before you are married. I know my country and its
people are still not very liberal and are rather narrow-minded. I wish this could change but this is how
we have been brought up. I think my circumstances and experiences has become part of my personality
that I can't help but feel awfully guilty I would give away my virginity like that to a man I love . I have
read about it online giving up your virginity to whom you choose is your choice and never others. I
completely agree, but I just feel so guilty and so conflicted with what my body and mind wants that I
don't know what to do.

He narrowing his eyes and side smiling , ooh shoot I just asked him out loud about sex his amused he
like seeing me this way on his Mercy I want to run away now this look his giving me is making me regret
thinking out loud

Him : tell me what you feeling right now ? , what happening to your body right now ?"

His voice so bold , So sexy , he rested back on his sit undressing me with his eyes I'm uncomfortable right
now

Him : Hle -Hle talk to me "

Ok FAM I'm screwed right now , he took his glass of wine and looked at me

Me : I'm ...I ... Mvelo ..stop it " I looked away he chuckled

Him: You don't need to tell me that I make you body heat up because I can see it in you face and you
body language , your body changes when you're turned on and it all foreign to you that you feel like
screaming because you don't know what to do with yourself . Your breathing speeds up, you get wet ,
your nipples are even hard, your brain turns to total mush, you desire me to help you take off the edge
...you scared but yet you so ready , Blood rushes to the walls of your vagina, so much so that it causes
fluid to pass through. The rush of blood is also what makes you all flushed in the cheeks and on your
chest and neck areas. Causing you lady parts to release juices "
I was not breathing normal and he could see this he came close to my face making his way to my ear

Him : I just gave you mind blowing sex in your head and I love how your body

Just responded to me Sithandwa sami you are sexual aroused just by looking at me ... And guess what I
feel the same .. " he kissed my neck shit I need to pee , his eyes were red and squinted he kissed my lips
so soft and stupid of me I moaned I felt him smile "

Him : let me check on the kids ... We spending the night here "

He stood up ran his hands on my face and walk away , I breath out loud once he was gone what is he
doing to me ,I gulped down the content of my juice and was about to fan myself ,

I looked up as I sense someone presence standing over me I was meet by her smile , I frowned what the
fuck does she want ?

Me : Maka Zithelo what a pleasant surprise unjani ?"

She was about to seat down but I stop

Me : ooh sweetheart please don't my Husband is occupying that sit , say what you have to say and Go
please " I faked a smile as

She frowned , she did not like this cocky side of me

Her : I saw you while having dinner thought I come say high you know phela we family " I hated the
sound of that I bet she waited for Mvelo o move to piss me off and guess what she doing a good job at it

Me : Hi !" I responded dismissing her , she must not mess up my Good mood
Her : I was thinking I can have a Word with Trey .... You know talk about Zee education and medical
needs she is special child and need both parents to work hand in hand ... I pass by the house and he was
nor there so I just thought I will still him for few minutes just to have a quick chat "

Me:mmmmmm I see , try calling him tomorrow because right now this is my time "

Her : I will do ... Infect since I'm here for a while i might as well go out on that outing he suggested with
him and Zee , you know how he is with the outdoor "

Me : outing ?"

Her : well since we coperanting Zee Dr suggested we do family date just me and him and our daughter
...so that Zee will get use to the change "

Me ; angizwanga !"

Her : ooh we talked about it while he was in Durban about us having family dates didn't he tell you ? '"

I folded my arms this women is getting on my last nerve she is such a thorn in my relationship

Her : you know when I look at you I see that you young you his Queen and all but Trey Needs a women a
mother to his child...so enjoy it what it last he will come back to me he always does ... Good night
princess "

He clicked her hills and walked out , I was fucked up mad

" was that Sli ?"

I looked at him , he had this look of guilt or nervous ,

I stood up " aish I'm tired babe now we may go upstairs " he held my hand and kissed my cheek we
walked with my arm blocked under his my had resting on his shoulder , I was not going to act all crazy in
front of all this people being the lady that I am I made my way to penthouse with him looking like the
perfect couple in perfect marriage.

Him : babe are you ok ..." I smiled and nodded , took off my shoes the minute we walked into the main
bedroom

Him : what did she say to you ..."

I looked at him and shook my had I did not want to talk about that women , I'm angry heartbroken but I
don't want to talk to him about this , but knowing Mveli he won't let this go

Him : Sbahle I can see you mad .. Talk to me "

Me : will it always be like this ... Me you and her ?"

Him : Sbahle my heart belongs to you Silindile is my past uyakwazi nje lokho "

I shook my head " she your baby mama , your business partner ... Veli friend , its not enough you made
her comfortable in coming in and out of the very same house I call my home , she is now leaving in your
hotel and you planing on having family dates with her ... When were you going to tell me about that !!"

Him : I..."

I stood up "she was at Pam's funeral ... The very same funeral you came back from a changed man ?....
Are you still sleeping with her ? "

Him : No !! ... I will never cheat on you with her "

Me : what is she doing here Mvelo!!!"

Him : I don't know ... She Zee mother babe she maybe came to help Zee with grieving ... She just lost an
aunt she needs her mom as well

Me : Wow !"

Him : baby please why you letting that women destroy our night .... Can't you see that she is
intensionally causing a drift between us and you allowing her "

Me : she walking all over me Mvelo ! And I'm suppose to just roll over and Smile because she is your
baby mama!!"

He looked down I clicked my tongue and made my way to the bathroom banging the door Jumping right
into it a shower I'm too angry to cry and hate that Sli feels like he has power over Mvelo , from what
Pam told me they have unresolved past I came along just when he found out he has a child with this
women and there breakup was messy and somehow I'm the one to blame.

Before he met me, he was with was dating some white girl he never loved her because he was still in
love with sli but they dated with that girl for years He broke it off with her because she wasn’t fulfilling
his needs or wants in a relationship, He told me the only reason why he stayed with her for so long was
because she was a distraction , sli came back while he was arranged to marry me ... He never gave me
any doubt about not loving me that why I agreed to be his wife but I guess when you not leaving with a
man you really do not know what going on with his daily life till you share the same roof with him he is
NOT the problem, his baby mother is. He has one child by her and I fear that he may run to her for sex if
I don't give him my fruit.

its been only two weeks in this marriage and I must admit I'm drained Recently, me and him has been
getting into it because of the things she would do when she comes over to check up on Zee
unannounced. I know that it’s NOT my house to be the boss, but I feel as though if you are in a
relationship with someone, but have a kids by somebody else, your ex shouldn’t be able to do whatever
she pleases when she comes over, especially if you have a woman living there. He says the reason for
him not speaking up to her is that he’s trying to keep the peace between them so she can see her child
... But that women's intention is not about seeing Zee , she want to have the sit ...my throne. Its
midnight and I'm yet alone in his bedroom I thought we getting somewhere but its back to square one
again I sigh and switched off the side lamp.

.
to be continued

chapter 50

unedited

5 day later

Sbahle ***

Its the day of cleansing ceremony today well in most African families this is done a month after a burial
of a love one and the spouse will only do it after 6 months to a year , I just finished making the
traditional beer yes guys my mom thought me well , I am what you call "the wife material " and was
busy with cooking baking ,

I hate people going in and out of my kitchen so that place is mine and mine alone , I cook for my family
and I do my husband laundry and cater to his needs no one else but me , today I was wearing a long
floral dress , with head scarf and another scarf on my shoulders just your topical makoti look.

" mam where do I put this " its was a case of drinks I pointed to the cold room

She bowed and walked away , the Mnguni people are the liker of things where i come from ceremony
like this suppose to involve close family members only but here it just another big event.

I heard a baby crying and stopped what I was doing and ran outside Zee was down and crying

Me : baby I told you to stop running " I picked her up and walked with her inside the house we made our
way to the bathroom in my bedroom where I wiped her tears and attended to scratches ,

Me : all done baby ... You promise to stop running "

She giggled and nodded

Me : come give me a squeeze " we hugged

Her : thank you Hle -hle "

I smiled I blame her father for calling me that now all the kids in this house are calling me by that name .

I felt his presence behind me he smelled so good I haven't seen or spoke to him for Two day , he was in
the mountain with Koko and Makhumalo doing sum ancestral prayer , Zee hugged her dad and they had
a mini conversation with him I was about to walk past him but he pulled me into a hug , and kiss my
forehead no matter how mad I am with him I still allow him to hold me and kiss me.

Him: Zithelo go check if Jr is not finishing your chips "

Zee climbed down from his hold and ran out

Me : no running !!"

Her : yes Hle-hle sorry " she said running , I shook my head and was about to walk out but he blocked
the way and closed the door , this space is so small with him in here

Him : Mabhengu ... " I looked at him we have been fighting like crazy ever since that day of Sli's
incounter , I don't know what he said to her but ever since that day I have not seen or heard from her .

I use to crack my head trying to figure out what happened that night , but he did come back home on
the wee hours and cuddled me smelling of alcohol the next morning he apologized for not looking at
things my way or considering my feelings yet again I took him back I blocked any bad thought about him
and sli together I'm naïve right.

So when we arrived at the royal house I almost lost my mind when he dropped another boomshell that
he want us to go to the UK
" why must I help you build your career when you don't want me to study "

Him : I don't mind you studying but not in cape town "

Me : I'm not going to the UK "

Him : you will go to the best law school there babe comeon meet me half way here "

Me : I'm trying but I feel like you detecting my life , first I had no say to this marriage , your baby mama
issue I need to understand , I need to study law because you say so , Sbahle do this do that ... , where is
my point of view in this marriage???

Him : don't raise your voice at me !!"

Me : I'm tired Mvelo ... Loving you is draining me .... I think maybe I should stay at penthouse !"

Him : what !!"

Him : I can not put my foot down in this house because its technically your ancestral home , I want a
place where I can be free walk around in my underwear I can not even talk to you around the house
because we got lot of eyes and ears looking at us "

Him : where is this coming from? .... So everything I try to do for you is not good enough !!" "

Me : I need my own house Mvelo ...my space... I feel like I'm drowning in stress "

Him : that's why I'm saying come with me ... New life and new environment "

I shook my head
Me : i want to studying art .. "

Him : I can make that happen for you , you can Even study in Italy they got the best schools there "

I need air he just does not get it , I don't want to leave , I walked out i banged the door in his face and
left him there , I did not even make it to the gate and I was already on his shoulders kicking and
screaming , he Then placed me on the bed and got on top of me as he kisses me senseless ... We kissed
before but today what he was doing to me made me loose my mind I was left with my bra and he was
sucking and licking my every part awakening things I did not know there were there , he was hard I could
feel him in between my legs my first thought was that we doing this today ...

Making out with him was mind blowing he was kissing my neck, and nibble on my ears, Caress my butt
ooh shit were is my skirt his hands were on my hips and thighs he looked at me for a moment I was on
my black bra and matching underwear I have never been this naked in front of him , he side smile I was
out of it ... I was a ball of mess and did not stop when his hands work down on my lady parts his hands
just rub me and I screamed his name , can I have sex with him with cloths on ?

The rough jean material was grinding against me ,my thigh or pelvis. Even after his pants were off he
kept on teasing me Leave my underwear on and trace his fingertip up and down my labia i was aching
for skin-to-skin

" mvelo .... Please .." I felt a build of foreign explosion , and suddenly he blew air on my face , I was
breathing heavily and he was chilled what just happens

Him : I need to fuck than make love to you , so you will listen and obey me ... Never walk out on me
when I'm talking to you "I nodded

I gasped " let me horner my sister memory and moan her for this few day and will finish this after
cleansing ceremony " he kissed me and walked to the bathroom " damn his good "

Back to the present day I looked at him and he looked at me ,

Him : I miss you ..."

I looked down and he held my waist I placed my head on his chest and he breath out loud ,

Him : I love you Sbahle and I know I suck at showing you this but I really do , I want to leave you behind
but I can't you are my world "

Me : but Mvelo " here we go again

Him : I'm not leaving you behind uyezwa ... Your married to me , you leaving with me , the kids will stay
behind .."

Me : but..."

Him : I'm not finished ..."

Him : will take Naledi with us ...every after three months will visit back here to check on the kids and the
kingdom , Koko is doing a good job and may continue while we gone ... "

Me : No !"

I pushed him away and opened the bathroom door

Him : Sbahle I'm too tired for this "

Me : before I am your wife I'm Queen my King , I don't know how you people do things this side, but
where I come from my people are my life ... This royal blood in me makes me the women i am today
and I need to pass it to our children your heir that will rule with the same straight and wisdom that I
have ...This is how its going to go "
He set on the edge of our bed and looked at me he is so hot when he has a bandana on his heard ' focus
Sbahle ' I cleared my Throat Men find confident women sexy so telling him what i want with a straight
face will make him listen. I didn't have to go full-on dominatrix on him but I was firm and direct

Him : not happening " he finally said and kick off his shoes

Me : you going to go to the UK and build your career and our company but in few years time i need you
back in this house permanently ... "

Him : uyazizwa ukuthi uthini ? "

Me : give me a chance to explain "

I need to make him relax his too worked out so i lifted my dress and I set on top of him in squatting
position he held my but I wrapped my arms around his neck

Me : Koko need me she is old to be alone in this house and having kids around gives her joy so I will stay
with her ... "

He was about to answer but I packed his lips

Me : Veli needs to move out I can not do my my duties with her breathing down my neck she need to
build her own self and stop doing royal duties , Pam is gone I'll take over her duties from her, i don't
think its appropriate for Veli to continue doing them ... "

He placed his head on my breast and breath out loud

Me : Zee and her mother may meet not in my house but visitation right will happened somewhere else
.... Pam kids need me I'm the only thing close to being there mother you can not take that away from
them too "

Him : you asking a lot " he did not look at me

Me : ooh my house I need it to be by the sea for summer vocations with my kids ..."

Him : and what do I get ... "

Me : you get to knock me up before you leave " he chuckled

Him : you got lot of demands "

Me : you once said there is nothing sexy then women who holds your balls "

Him : your hand never even went down to touch then ..."

Me : Mvelo " his hands were under my dress now

he tossed me over and I was giggling and we were disturbed by a nock

Him : shit ....start looking for that house "

I laughed as I got off him to open the door

Makhumalo greeted me she stood by the door

" i see isithunzela in your life Ndlovukazi some one is planning ukuchitha umuzi wakho ...( i see dark
entity about to destroy your marriage ) please follow me to the ancestry room "

Me : yebo ma " she nodded and walked away

.
to be continued ...