SCIENCE OF HOW HABIT WORKS

The 3 R's of Habit Change

There is a simple 3–step pattern that every habit

follows. I call this pattern the “3 R's of Habit
Change” and it goes like this...

1. Reminder (the trigger that initiates the

behavior)
2. Routine (the behavior itself; the action you take)
3. Reward (the benefit you gain from doing the
behavior)
How 3 R’s look like:In this case, answering a phone call.

Step One:
Your phone rings (reminder). This is the reminder that
initiates the behavior. The ring acts as a trigger or cue to
tell you to answer the phone. It is the prompt that starts
the behavior.
Step Two: You answer your phone (routine). This is the actual behavior.
When your phone rings, you have a habit of answering it.

Step Three: You find out who is calling (reward). The

reward is the benefit gained from doing the behavior. In
this case, the reward for completing the habit was
satisfying your curiosity to find out why the other person
was calling you.
Result:
If the reward is positive, then the cycle forms a positive
feedback loop that tells your brain, “Next time this
reminder happens, do the same thing.” (i.e. When the
phone rings again, answer it.)
Follow this same cycle enough times and you'll stop
thinking about it. Your behavior will just become a habit.
How can you use this structure to create new habits and
actually stick to them?
 Step 1:

Use a Current Habit as the Reminder for Your New One

How to Choose Your Reminder

The best way to discover a good reminder for your new

habit is to write down two lists.

In the first list, write down the things that you do each day without fail.
For example…
★ Get in the shower.
★ Put your shoes on.
★ Brush your teeth.
★ Flush the toilet.
You’ll often find that many of these items are daily health habits like washing
your face, drinking morning tea, brushing your teeth, and so on. Those actions
can act as reminders for new health
habits.
For example, “ After I drink my morning tea, I meditate for 60 seconds. ”
In the second list, write down the things that happen to
you each day...
★ You stop at a red light.
★ You get a text message.
★ A commercial comes on TV.
★ A song ends.
★ The sun sets.
These events can also act as triggers for your new habit.
For example, if you wanted to “ When a commercial comes
on TV, I do five pushups. ”
With these two lists, you’ll have a wide range of things
that you already do and already respond
to each day. Those are the perfect reminders for new
habits.

For example, let’s say you want to feel happier.

Expressing gratitude is one proven way to boost
happiness. Using the list above, you could pick the
reminder “sit down for dinner” and use it as a
cue to say one thing that you’re grateful for today.
“ When I sit down for dinner, I say one thing that I’m
grateful for today. ”
That’s the type of small behavior that could blossom into
a more grateful outlook on life in
general.
 Step 2:
Make Your Habits Incredibly Easy to Start
If you want to start a new habit and begin living
healthier and happier, then : start small. In the words
of Leo Babauta, “make it so easy that you can’t say
no.”

In the beginning, performance doesn’t matter. What

does matter is becoming the type of person who
always sticks to your new habit – no matter how small
or insignificant it seems. You can build up to the level
of performance that you want once the behavior
becomes consistent.
 Step 3:

Always Reward Yourself

For example, if I’m working towards a new fitness goal, then I’ll often tell myself at
the end of a workout, “That was a good day.” Or, “Good job. You made progress
today.”
If you feel like it, you could even tell yourself “Victory!” or “Success!” each time
you do your new habit.
Some people swear by it.
★ Floss one tooth. “Victory!”
★ Eat a healthy meal. “Success!”
★ Do five pushups. “Good work!”

Make sure that the habits you are trying to build are actually important to you.
25 Steps to Break ANY Bad Habit
 PART I:
LAYING THE FOUNDATION FOR A HABIT CHANGE
Step #1: Know the Difference between Bad Habits and
Step-1:
Addictions

PART I:
LAYING THE FOUNDATION FOR A HABIT CHANGE
Do you have an addiction?

The following questions will help you determine the true answer.
Do you:
1. Experience withdrawal symptoms when you stop doing the behavior (e.g. lack of focus, anger,
frustration or insomnia)?
2. Stop doing the activities you once found enjoyable to engage in this habit instead?
3. Go on binges whenever you do the habit?
4. Keep a stash or supply of the product for emergencies (i.e. hiding bottles of alcohol
throughout your home)?
5. Obsess about doing the activity to the point where it interferes with your daily routine?
6. Have financial difficulties because you’ve spent all of your money on the activity?
7. Have trouble limiting the activity? For instance, one pint turns into a binge-drinking session
that ends with you blacking out.
8. Have health issues directly related to this activity?
9. Engage in risky behavior whenever doing this activity?
10. Do the activity as a way to deal with stress and emotional problems?
11. Deny or hide your behavior from others?
12. Damage your interpersonal relationships because of this activity? PART I:
LAYING THE FOUNDATION FOR A HABIT CHANGE
Sometimes you might want to seek out a professional
solution to your possible addiction.
Here are few ways to do this:

• Talk to a psychologist or psychiatrist who specializes

in addictions.
• Join a group like NA (Narcotics Anonymous) or AA
(Alcoholics Anonymous).
• Join a weight-loss group that emphasizes permanent
life changes instead of fad diets.
• Ask your doctor about different (non-addictive) ways
to battle cravings.

PART I:
LAYING THE FOUNDATION FOR A HABIT CHANGE
Step#2:#1:
Step-2:
Step Focus
Focus OnHabit
on One oneatHabit
a Time at a time

Even if you want to change multiple areas of your life,

it’s best to commit to one habit change at a time. That
way, you can focus all your mental energy on making one
change.

PART I:
LAYING THE FOUNDATION FOR A HABIT CHANGE
Step-3: Commit to a 30 day Habit Challenge

• In a way, the 30DHC tricks your mind into forming a

new habit. It’s easy to do something unpleasant if
you think it’s only for a month. And when the time
expires, you’ll be close to making a permanent
change.
• The 30DHC also gives you an “out” if the new habit
isn’t working. At the end of the month, you can
decide if it’s worth continuing. That said, what usually
happens is you want to maintain that momentum
and keep going, even at the end of the 30-day period.

PART I:
LAYING THE FOUNDATION FOR A HABIT CHANGE
ACTION PLAN

(1*) Have a Reason Why

Start by journaling about this habit. Give a specific
reason why it matters. What you write is irrelevant. The
important thing is to know why you want to make this
change and what result you expect from this experience.

(2*) Obstacles
Use your journal to track triggers by writing them as they
occur. Include the following important information:
Where are you? Who is with you? What are you doing?
What thoughts are in your head?
This data is very important for eliminating the bad habit
and replacing it with something positive. PART I:
LAYING THE FOUNDATION FOR A HABIT CHANGE
(3*) Action Plan
Write down an overview of the habit, along with the
step-by-step actions you’ll take. Be sure to include any
tools or environmental cues that will help or hinder your
completion of this new routine.

(4*) Results
Track your success with a daily metric. The tool I use is
Lift.do, which tracks all my current habits.
You can track a habit in a variety of ways:
Yes or No (Did you do it today or not?)
Quantity (How many times did you complete the habit?)
Number (Are you over or under the set “quota”?)
Time (How long did you spend on this habit every day?)
PART I:
LAYING THE FOUNDATION FOR A HABIT CHANGE
(5*) Verdict
It’s important to make a decision after 30 days.
I recommend doing one of three things: (1) Keep It:
Continue to track this habit on a daily basis. Try to turn it
into a permanent change. (2) Ditch It: The habit didn’t
work for some reason, so stop doing it. (3) Tweak It:
Some habit changes won’t work because you created a
bad process. Change the routine and try it again.

PART I:
LAYING THE FOUNDATION FOR A HABIT CHANGE
Step-4: Set a Start Date

Write down the date when you’ll start this habit change.
It’s important to take this goal seriously, so having an
official “countdown” will help you stay on track. You
should also tell friends and family members about this
goal to get their support.

Start as soon as possible. Sure, it won’t be a full month,

but the important thing is you’re taking immediate
action. PART I:
LAYING THE FOUNDATION FOR A HABIT CHANGE
Step-5: Identify The Target Goal

• For instance, you can’t say,

“I want to eat healthier.” Instead, you need to identify
what foods to eat, what foods to avoid and the date
when this change will happen.

• The following would be a better goal:

“On August 1, I will no longer eat fast food from places
like McDonald’s or Burger King. Instead, I will eat home-
cooked meals that combine vegetables with lean protein
and unrefined carbohydrates.”

PART I:
LAYING THE FOUNDATION FOR A HABIT CHANGE
Step-6: Avoid Cold Turkey Solutions

It’s easier to chunk down a habit change into small

actions. That way, you’re not drawing too much from
your overtaxed willpower. The idea here is to create
small wins that build emotional momentum, which helps
you prevent those spectacular failures that often happen
with cold turkey solutions.

As an example, it’s impossible to overhaul your entire

diet in a single month. What you could do instead is
focus on a small aspect of your diet for the next 30 days,
like not eating at a fast food restaurant. Then when
you’ve eliminated this habit, you can chip away at the
other negative aspects of your diet.
PART I:
LAYING THE FOUNDATION FOR A HABIT CHANGE
Step-7: Set a Baseline Metric

Your aim is to wean yourself from the habit by setting

target goals that consistently decrease the amount of
time you spend on it.
It all starts with a baseline metric. This metric can vary
according to the specific habit you’re trying to change:

• A daily “yes” or “no” for eating fast food

• The number of cigarettes smoked every day
• The number of times each day you bite your
fingernails
• How much you currently weigh
• The number of calories you consume on a daily basis
• How many drinks you consume while “going out”
• The amount of time spent on Facebook or surfing the
Internet
• The amount of time spent watching television PART I:
LAYING THE FOUNDATION FOR A HABIT CHANGE
Step-8: Create Incremental Goals

EXAMPLE:
Let’s say you’re a smoker who averages 20 cigarettes a day.
Your ultimate goal is to completely eliminate this habit. But for
now, you’d stick to these incremental goals:
15 cigarettes each day for weeks 1 to 3
10 cigarettes each day for weeks 4 to 6
5 cigarettes each day for weeks 7 to 9
3 cigarettes each day for weeks 10 to 12
1 (or fewer) cigarettes each day for weeks 13 and beyond

PART I:
LAYING THE FOUNDATION FOR A HABIT CHANGE
 PART 2:
UNDERSTAND YOUR HABIT
LOOP
Step-9: Identify the Habit Routine

Once you’ve scheduled a “start date,” you’ll want to take time to

understand the three-step pattern of your habit:
1. The Cue: A situational trigger based on a reward you’re seeking.
2. The Reward: The satisfaction you seek by following the routine.
3. The Routine: A physical or emotional action you take to obtain the
reward.
Step-10: Record the Habit Triggers

To make a permanent change, you need to fully

understand when and why these “triggers” occur. You
can easily do this by recording five pieces of information
whenever you feel the need to engage in a bad habit:

1. Location: Record where you are.

2. Time: Write down the exact time when you felt the
urge.
3. Mood: Record your emotional state and what you’re
thinking.
4. People: Who is with you or who is around you?
5. Action: What did you just do? What are you currently
doing?
EXAMPLE:
Let’s say you’re trying to curb your consumption of
alcohol. In addition to seeking help from others (like I
described in step #1), you’d get insight on this habit by
tracking its triggers. After careful recording, you notice
that these five patterns stand out:
1. Location: O’Brien’s Bar & Grille
2. Time: 3:00 p.m.
3. Mood: Stressed out
4. People: With “The Guys” (Frank, Bill and Dave)
5. Action: Watching the baseball game
By analyzing these triggers, you now know that your
drinking is caused by a desire to feel relaxed and reduce
stress. More importantly, it’s an activity you prefer to
share with other people.
Step-11: Try Different Rewards

The interesting thing about bad habits is they often come

from a desire to receive a subconscious reward. Usually we do
them because we want to feel relaxed, happy, energized,
accepted or loved.
The good news is you can substitute a bad habit with a new
routine and still receive this positive benefit. The trick is to
experiment with rewards and find one that produces the
same subconscious reward.
EXAMPLE:
Let’s go back to the example from before—consuming too much
alcohol. After identifying triggers for a few days, you realize the
drinking habit comes from a need to reduce stress and feel relaxed.
It’s also a byproduct of a desire to socialize and have fun.
So you can plan different strategies whenever you feel the need to
relax:
• Going for a 10-minute walk around the neighborhood
• Avoiding O’Brien’s Bar & Grille
• Doing a different activity with friends instead of drinking
• Making new connections and building up your social network
• Meditating for a half-hour
Step-12: See what Works

Let’s go back to our drinking example.

You tried exercise and meditation, but neither reduced your
stress levels. What did work was forming new friendships
with people who don’t spend their time in a bar. These
positive people help you feel relaxed, which minimizes the
tense feeling you experience before having a drink.
You also know that Dave (one of your buddies from O’Brien’s
Bar & Grille) loves hiking, which is an activity you also enjoy.
This means you can minimize your drinking while staying
connected to one of your friends.
Step-13: Create an “If –Then Plan”

It often takes a few weeks of experimenting to find a

replacement habit. Eventually, though, you’ll find a
routine that produces the same reward. When that
happens, you should realign your mindset to focus on
repeating this behavior instead of dwelling on the habit
you’re trying to eliminate.
The best way to make a lasting change is to follow a
step-by-step plan whenever you experience that impulse
to revert back to old behavior.
All of this is possible with an if-then plan.
Once again, let’s go back to the drinking example. Here are a few
new strategies you could implement:
“When Dave invites me to O’Brien’s, I will suggest a hike
instead.”
“On ‘Football Sunday,’ I will attend Meetup.com activities
instead of hitting the bar.”
“At 5:00 every day, I will go for a 30-minute walk to reduce
stress.”
The idea here is to identify your “weak spots” and create a plan
for how you’ll act. This will be your first line of defense against a
bad-habit impulse. Whenever a craving strikes, you’ll know
exactly what to do instead.
Step-14: Use “Habit Reminders” to Stay Consistent

Habit reminders are a great way to build a new routine.

Write these reminders down on a piece of paper you
keep with you at all times, or add them as alerts on your
cellphone. These reminders might seem silly, yet they
act as a great catalyst to keep repeating your
replacement habit.
 PART 3:
BUILD A SUPPORT
PART SYSTEM
III: BUILD A SUPPORT SYSTEM
Step-15: Keep an accountability Journal

Depending on the nature of the routine, here are a few

things to include in an accountability journal:
• Number of times you do the bad habit
• Amount of time you spend doing this activity
• Total calories, broken down by individual foods
• Current weight and/or body mass index
• Feelings, emotions and impulses
• Challenges you’re currently experiencing
Step-16: Make a Public declaration

Social networks have become a major part of our daily

existence, so a great way to harness these friendships is
to ask for support on your habit change goal.
Nobody wants to look bad. Post updates of your habit
change on social media account to get encouragement
from your friends. Create a simple tweet or Facebook
post, or use a mobile phone app like Lift.do. Lift
automatically updates your account with progress
reports.
Never underestimate the power of social approval.
Simply knowing you have to be accountable for your
actions keeps you focused on a habit change.
The lesson here?

When people are being observed, they want to look

good and perform well.
It is human nature. If we know we’re being watched, it’s
natural to increase our performance and give that little
bit of extra effort.
The Hawthorne Effect shows that we do better when we
know we’re being watched and reviewed by others. So
to improve your chances of success, simply put yourself
out there to be observed by others.
You can do this by making public declarations in five ways:
1. Tell your family and friends about your goals.
2. Post updates on social media sites like Facebook, Twitter and
Google+.
3. Join habit-related online groups and find accountability partners.
4. Use habit-building apps (like Lift.do).
5. Start a blog or podcast that chronicles your habit change journey.
Step-17 Find an Accountability Partner

A way to supercharge your replacement habit efforts is to meet

with someone who shares a similar desire to change that
behavior.
You can talk with this person a few times each week and share
your experiences. If they live locally, you can meet in person to
build the new routine together. This is a great strategy if you’d
like to replace a poor health habit with regular exercise.
Another idea is to find a “sponsor” who can talk you through
those moments of weakness. Simply call this person when you
feel tempted and they’ll help you overcome the challenge.
Finally, the Stickk tool provides a unique way to stick
with a habit change. Here, you’ll make a “Commitment
Contract” to achieve a goal within a specific timeframe.
The hitch is you have to invest money in this habit
change. If you don’t follow through, then your cash will
go to the charity (or anti-charity) of your choice.
Step-18 Ignore the Nay Sayers

As an example, you could do any (or all) of the following:

“If my parents remind me of past failures, then I will politely change the
subject.”
“If I post a status on social media and get a negative response from
someone, then I will either remove that person as a friend or “mute”
their updates.”
“If I don’t get a positive experience from a habit-building tool, then I
will download another app that reinforces my new behavior.”
“If the people around me dwell in negativity, then I will start
surrounding myself with more positive people.”
Step-19 Avoid Trigger Locations

During the weeks while you’re testing a replacement

habit, try to avoid the places that might cause you to
revert back to your old behavior.
For instance, many people smoke while they’re drinking.
So if you’re looking to eliminate the cigarette habit, the
best thing you can do is avoid the bar scene. Yes, this
might mean ditching your friends for a brief period, but
this strategy can help you minimize the impulses you’ll
feel to light up.
 PART 4:
OverCome Challenges
PART IV: OVERCOME
CHALLENGES
Step-20 Maintain a Healthy LifeStyle and Attitude

Ego depletion can leave your willpower in a weakened

state. If you’re always tired, hungry, stressed or
depressed, you’re more likely to succumb to temptation.
A simple way to fight ego depletion is to live a healthy
lifestyle.
• Getting a full night’s sleep to feel energized in the
morning.
• Staying hydrated by drinking at least eight, 8-ounce
cups of water every day.
• Eating a balanced meal every day—including fruits,
vegetables, (good) carbohydrates and lean protein.
• Carrying healthy snacks with you to eat when you feel
hungry.
• Exercising to reduce stress and maintain an optimal
weight.
Step-21 Beware the “What- the –Hell Effect

• For instance, let’s say your goal is to smoke fewer

than 10 cigarettes per day. Unfortunately, one day
you slip up and smoke 12 instead. What you
shouldn’t do is have this attitude: “What the hell,
since I’ve already smoked 12 cigarettes, I might as
well enjoy the day and smoke the whole pack!”
• The what-the-hell effect is a dangerous threat to your
habit change. Whenever you slip up, simply accept
the failure and focus on minimizing the damage.
More importantly, never use it as an excuse to do
more of the bad habit.
Step-22 Practice Streaking

The “streak habit” works because you create permanent

routines. You don’t worry about individual successes or
failures. Instead, you focus on repeating the process day
in and day out.
If you’re an aspiring writer, you write every day. If you
want to eat better, you stick to a sensible food plan
every day. And if you want to be more productive, you
complete a small list of your most important daily tasks.
It’s not hard to form a habit when you have the “no-
excuse” mindset. Simply focus on doing it—without
fail—every single day and it’ll turn into a permanent
routine.
Step-23 Forgive yourself

While it’s important to be strict about a habit change,

you want to avoid filling your head with negative
thoughts. A mistake is a mistake. It doesn’t mean you’re
weak-willed or lazy. It means you’re human like the rest
of us.
Step-24 Celebrate Small Wins

Small wins make you feel like you’re accomplishing

something. If you focus too much on the habit you’re
trying to break, you’ll never feel like you’re making
progress. By focusing on small wins, you’ll have the
motivation to keep going when you experience those
moments of temptation.
Step-25 Focus On the Journey,Not the destination

Habit development is like running a marathon. You can’t

start training today and expect to run 26.2 miles next
week. But if you keep at it for a year, it’s not hard to
complete one of these events. The key to building any
habit is consistency and daily action. Stay focused on
what you need to do right now, ignoring what might
happen in the future.