PERSONAL RELATIONHIPS
Big Question? How does knowing more about attraction, love, and
commitment help you become more responsible in a relationship?
For clear understanding let us define the following terms:
Relationship, Personal Relationship, Love, Commitment, Attraction and
Responsibility
1. Relationship is a state of connectedness between people (especially
an emotional connection)
2. Personal relationships are relationships between people, especially
those between friends, lovers and family members
3. Love is a strong affection for another arising out of kinship or
personalities
4. Commitment is the act of binding yourself (intellectually or
emotionally) to a course of action and a message that makes a pledge
5. Attraction is the act, power, or property of attracting - Attractive
quality; magnetic charm; fascination; allurement; enticement - A person
or thing that draws, attracts, allures, or entices
6. Responsibility is the social force that binds you to the courses of
action demanded by that force - A form of trustworthiness; the trait of
being answerable to someone for something or being responsible for
one’s conduct.
WHAT DO WE MEAN BY PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS?
The concept of relationship is very broad and complex. In our model,
personal
relationships refer to close connections between people, formed by
emotional bonds and interactions. These bonds often grow from and are
strengthened by mutual experiences. Relationships are not static; they
are continually evolving, and to fully enjoy and benefit from them, we
need skills, information, inspiration, practice, and social support. In our
model, there are three kinds of personal relationships:
Family
The concept of "family" is an essential component in any discussion of
relationships, but this varies greatly from person to person. The Bureau of
the Census defines family as "two or more persons who are related by
birth, marriage, or adoption and who live together as one household." But
many people have family they don't live with or to whom they are not
bonded by love, and the roles of family vary across cultures as well as
throughout your own lifetime. Some typical characteristics of a family are
support, mutual trust, regular interactions, shared beliefs and values,
security, and a sense of community. Although the concept of "family" is
one of the oldest in human nature, its definition has evolved considerably
in the past three decades. Non-traditional family structures and roles can
provide as much comfort and support as traditional forms.
Friends
A friendship can be thought of as a close tie between two people that is
often built upon mutual experiences, shared interests, proximity, and
emotional bonding. Friends are able to turn to each other in times of need.
Nicholas Christakis and James Fowler, social-network researchers and
authors of the book Connected, find that the average person has about six
close ties—though some have more, and many have only one or none.
Note that online friends don’t count toward close ties—research indicates
that a large
online network isn’t nearly as powerful as having a few close, real-life
friends.
Partnerships
Romantic partnerships, including marriage, are close relationships formed
between two people that are built upon affection, trust, intimacy, and
romantic love. We usually experience this kind of relationship with only
one person at a time.
Let’s understand some of the ACCEPTABLE and UNACCEPTABLE
expression of attractions.
ACTIVITIES:
I Know the Signs of a Healthy Relationship
Direction: Put a HEART before each statement which you think is
a sign of a healthy relationship; in contrast, put an X before each
statement that you think is a sign of an unhealthy relationship.
Write your answer on a separate sheet.
________1. You can express your opinion without fear or dread.
________2. You and your partner can make decisions fairly together.
________3. Each person takes responsibility for their own actions.
________4. Your partner supports you and your choices—even when he/she
disagrees with you.
________5. You respect and encourage each other.
________6. You give each other space to study or hang out with friends or
family.
________7. You are able to make your own decisions about spending your
money without worrying about your partner’s reaction.
________8. You feel isolated from friends and family.
________9. Your partner tries to control how you spend time and who you
hang
out with.
________10. Your partner tries to control how you spend money.
________11. Your partner doesn’t support your decisions.
________12. You are sometimes forced to do something that you’re not
comfortable with.
________13. Your partner threatens, insults, or humiliates you.
________14. Your partner hurts you physically or emotionally.
________15. Your partner doesn’t keep your secrets safe.
Statements on Relationships
Direction: Write T if the statement is TRUE and F if it is otherwise.
Write your
answer on a separate sheet.
1. It is important to work on communicating our feelings in relationships.
2. To love someone, we must love our self-first.
3. Trying to understand where other people are coming from rather than
judging them helps us build and maintain relationships.
4. Having a good relationship does not contribute anything to us having
good health.
5. When people listen deeply and let us know that they recognize the
feeling behind our words, more likely than not, our relationship is doing
good.
6. In our relationships, it is vital that we practice forgiveness when a loved
one has hurt us.
7. Our loved ones cannot help us when we deal with stress.
8. Using positive methods to resolve conflict will more likely help us
maintain good relationships.
9. Expressing gratitude to our friends and family help us maintain good
relationships.
10. Significant differences in core values and beliefs never create a
problem in
relationships.
11. We are happy in our relationships when our loved ones stay connected
by
spending time with us and letting us know that they love us.
12. Excessive reliance on social media can be a cause of tension in
relationships.
13. Relationships are static; they are unchangeable.
14. Being compassionate, forgiving and grateful contribute to healthy
relationships.
15. To fully enjoy and benefit from relationships we need skills,
information,
inspiration, practice, and social support.
