Sexuality and Mental Health

How may sexuality affect mental health?

Having any particular sexual orientation does not mean you have a mental health problem. But
the experiences you have because of your sexuality can impact your mental health. Sometimes, people
are bullied, treated differently or badly because of their sexuality. You might be made to feel different
from those around you, or might have friends or family who don’t understand or support your sexuality.

Society may treat you differently, not understand your sexuality, or not accept it. There may be
places where you don’t feel safe or comfortable. These are all experiences or feelings that can leave you
feeling upset, worried or isolated.

You may not have experienced these things directly yourself, but have witnessed or heard of
people being treated badly because of their sexuality. Understandably, this might make you feel afraid of
sharing your sexuality with others, especially if it’s for the first time.

No one deserves to be treated differently. Whether you have these experiences one time, or on
a regular basis, it can have an impact on your mental health and how you think and feel about yourself.
You may find yourself feeling down, anxious or isolated. Constantly carrying these emotions can be
exhausting, and you may have difficulty concentrating or trouble doing everyday tasks like eating or
sleeping. But there are steps you can take to get the help and support you deserve.

No one deserves to be treated differently because of their sexuality, and you should be able to
live freely and without fear. In recent years, society has come a long way in ensuring there is equality for
LGBTQIA+ people with laws such as the Marriage (Same Sex Couples) Act. While there is still much more
to be done, it can be helpful to remember there are people working hard every day to create a more
equal society.

What can be done to look after mental health?

Talk

 Talking to somebody you trust about how you’re feeling and what you’ve experienced can really
help. You could talk to close friends, family, parents, a teacher you get on with, a counsellor or
mentor. You might not know exactly what to say and that’s okay. Talking to someone can help
you to understand how you feel, and helps people around you think about how they can support
you.

Write it down

 If you don’t feel comfortable talking to anyone or you’re not sure what you want to say, writing
your thoughts down can help. You could also write down positive quotes or messages that help
you feel good and stick them up in your living space so that you can look at them each day.
Find your ‘safe spaces’

 Finding a ‘safe space’ where you can focus on your mental health can help you switch off and
feel calm. This could be a local LGBTQIA+ group in your community, at school, or online. Or your
‘safe space’ could be a hobby that you enjoy doing, a favorite show you enjoy watching, or a chat
with a friend who makes you feel safe.

Create boundaries to prioritize your mental health

 Sometimes conversations can be uncomfortable. If you start to feel uncomfortable or trapped in

a situation, simply walking away can help create a boundary for you. If you can, remove yourself
from whoever is upsetting you so that you can take a moment to breathe and calm your
thoughts.

Find role models

 There are lots of people, whether they are people you know or influencers online, that can help
you to feel positive and empowered. It can help to see other people like you who are going
through a similar journey.

Clean your social media feed

 If you are seeing things online that make you feel upset or pressured, remember you can mute,
block or unfollow accounts that bring you down. Taking breaks from social media can really help
too – so try deleting your apps for a weekend and seeing if it helps. For more tips on how to have
positive time online take a look at our social media and mental health page.

Talking about your sexuality with others

Sharing your sexuality with others for the first time is often called ‘coming out’. It can feel scary
or daunting to talk about your sexuality for the first time with someone, especially if you aren’t sure
what they’ll say or how they’ll react.

If you’re nervous about how someone might respond, you could try asking them for their
thoughts on an LGBTQIA+ topic first. This might help you understand their thoughts better, and get a
feeling for whether they’re likely to be supportive.

Before you have the conversation, consider what your boundaries are, e.g. how much you do
and don’t want to share. Writing down what you are going to say first can also help if you are feeling
nervous. You might want to consider an ‘exit plan’ too – a way to remove yourself from the conversation
if you start to feel uncomfortable or unsafe.
What if I don't want to come out?

Some people find it really empowering to speak about their sexuality, whereas others might not
want to. Sometimes, you may feel pressure to ‘come out’, and feel that others have a right to know your
sexuality when you don’t want to share or you’re not ready. Or, it may not be safe for you to come out if
you’re not sure about how someone will react.

Remember, it’s okay not to share your sexuality if you don’t want to; you have no obligation to
and it’s up to you who you talk to. Whether you’re inviting people to know about your sexuality or not,
everyone’s experience is different, and they are all valid.

SOGIE

Sex refers to categories that people are assigned to at birth based on reproductive
characteristics. For example, a human child born having a penis is categorized as male, while a child born
having a vagina is categorized as female.

On the other hand, gender refers to the socially constructed roles, behaviors, expressions and
identities of girls, women, boys, men, and gender diverse people. It influences how people perceive
themselves and each other, how they act and Interact, and the distribution of power and resources in
society.

SOGIE is the abbreviation for sexual orientation, gender identity, and (gender) expression. It's
usually associated with "LGBTQIA++" because, SOGIE refers to characteristics common to all human
beings because everyone has a sexual orientation and a gender identity. Everyone also expresses their
gender, not just lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people, but even straight people.

 Sexual orientation refers to whom a person is sexually attracted to. If a man is attracted to
another man, he is gay; a woman attracted to a woman is a lesbian; if a person is attracted to
both genders, they are bisexual (that's what we called MAYA in our own slang term); and those
who like people regardless of gender are pansexual. Being heterosexual or straight is also
classified here.
 Gender identity refers to how a person identifies themselves. This is different from the sex we
were assigned to at birth because it mostly just refers to our anatomical and hormonal
distinctions. For example: If you are born female and Identify as a female, you are considered
cisgender. But if you were born male but identify as a female, you are transgender.
 Lastly, gender expression is how a person embodies their gender attributes and roles. One can
be straight or LGBT and be into androgynous looks, or the mixing of feminine and masculine
elements. Crossdressers, aka people wearing the clothing of the opposite gender, is also
considered a gender expression.

History of SOGIE
  The Philippines is a predominantly country with a unique relationship to the LGBTQ community,
on the surface, Philippines seems to have accepted the LGBTQ community since gay and bisexual
men and women are allowed to serve in the military or even famous celebrities are members of
the LGBT community. However, Over the past years the conversation on the SOGIE EQUALITY bill
is taking over the news and social media after the rising numbers of brutal killings, criticism,
discrimination and mis-gender.
 The earliest version of the SOGIE EQUALITY BILL was filed in the 2000s by late senator Meriam
Defensor Santiago and former Akbayan representative Lorretta Rosales under the 11th congress
of the Philippines but sadly it only reached the committee level and didn't pass the law.
 July 26,2004 under 13th Congress, Senator Santiago filed the employment non- discrimination
bill which aims to prohibit employment discrimination on the basis on sexual orientation. Then
after that, similar measures continued to be filed by other senators during 13th to 16th congress
but unfortunately none of it have been successful.
 In May 2019 the SOGIE EQUALITY BILL officially became the longest running bill under the senate
period in the Philippines.
 The following year and the latest bill are filed by Senator Risa Hontiveros under the 17th
congress, it is the first senate version of the SOGIE Equality bill which passed the anti-
discrimination bill, then after that the version of the SOGIE EQUALITY bill were refiled in the 18th
congress by Senator Hontiveros still on December 2020 no.1934 or the proposed SOGIESC
BASED ANTI DISCRIMINATION ACT. It includes prohibiting marginalization and violence based on
sex characteristic.
 As of now the fight for equality still continues and as Hontiveros said "may the 18th congress be
the congress that would finally put the bill into a vote and we'd be known as the legislators’
allies who stood up against discrimination and fought for equality.

Sexual Orientation

 Or Sexual attraction refers to a person's emotional and/or sexual attraction to others.

 Sexual orientation is emphasized as "who am I attracted to?" who you feel drawn to
romantically, emotionally, and sexually.
 Sexuality is complex and attraction can manifest very differently for different people. Categories
are commonly used to understand our attractions, but aren't always inclusive of the vast variety
of expression that make up human sexuality.
 Sexuality is an important part of who we are as humans. Beyond the ability to reproduce,
sexuality also defines how we see ourselves and how we physically relate to others.
 Sexual orientation is an enduring pattern of romantic or sexual attraction (or a combination of
these) you persons of the opposite sex or gender, the same sex or gender, or to both sexes or
more than one gender.

What Determines Sexual Orientation?

Most scientists agree that sexual orientation (including homosexuality and bisexuality) is the
result of a combination of environmental, emotional, hormonal, and biological factors. In other words,
many things contribute to a person's sexual orientation, and the factors may be different for different
people.

Sexual orientation can be classified into 5 categories: Language about sexuality is constantly evolving
and deserves our continued attention and learning:

1. Heterosexuals. Are people who are attracted to a different gender. They are labelled to be straight. A
man attracted to woman and a woman attracted to man.

2. Homosexual. Are people who are attracted to people of the same gender. They are referred to as
lesbian and gay. Wherein lesbian is when a woman is attracted to other women and gay is when a man is
attracted to men. Some people, however, use the term gay for all same gender attraction.

3. Bisexual. Is a person who is attracted to both men and women. Sexually attracted not exclusively to
people of one particular gender; attracted to both men and women.

4. Asexual. Are people without sexual feelings or associations. Asexual individuals may still experience
attraction but this attraction doesn't need to be realized in any sexual manner. Some people do not have
sexual attraction or desire, and they may be identified as asexual.

5. Pansexual. Someone who is attracted to all genders. Pansexuality, is the sexual, romantic or
emotional attraction towards people regardless of the sex or gender identity.

Coming out is described in three phases.

1. The first phase is the phase of "knowing oneself", and the realization emerges that one is sexually and
emotionally attracted to members of one's own sex. This is often described as an internal coming out
and can occur in childhood or at puberty, but sometimes as late as age 40 or older.

2. The second phase involves a decision to come out to others, family, friends, and colleagues.

3. Third phase involves living openly as an LGBTQ person.