D

IS

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TO

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N
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CLAY
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VA

__________________________
LL

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EY

A one-act dramedy by
PE
R

Carol S. Lashof
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IN

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A
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A single copy of this script may be printed for evaluation or

TS

PY
individual use only. Multiple copies may not be printed or
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duplicated for use in the classroom or for production, and

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ownership of this perusal copy does not grant the right to

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perform this play or any portion of it.

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www.youthplays.com
[email protected]
424-703-5315
Clay © 2010 Carol S. Lashof
All rights reserved. ISBN 978-1-62088-394-5.

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 CAST OF CHARACTERS
AARON, male, a junior.
SOPHIE, female, a sophomore.
WILL, male, a sophomore.

PY
ZETA, female, a junior.

TIME

O
The present. Fall.

PLACE C
T
A large public high school in the U.S. Specific locales L
O
O

(corridor, library, art room) should be suggested with the bare

O
H
SC

minimum of set pieces and properties.

T
R
N
A
H

Elements of this script were developed at the second annual

C
TS

Earl Hamner Jr. Playwrights Conference at The Hamner

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O
A

Theater in Nelson County, Virginia, co-sponsored by the

G

Shenandoah Playwrights Retreat.

IN
M
D
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FO
R
PE
EY
LL
VA
R
EE
N
O
PI
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ED
SU
IS
 Clay 5

SCENE 1
(We are in the corridor of a high school during passing period.
The usual chaos: BELLS RINGING, LOCKERS SLAMMING,
cell phones emitting various RING TONES, STUDENTS
D
TALKING, TEACHERS SHOUTING... AARON enters,
wearing an obviously heavy backpack stuffed to the brim. He
IS

O
S

carries a notebook and pencil box as well. He stops center stage

U
ED

and squints at the audience. Then he swings his backpack off his
TO

shoulder, drops it on the floor next to him and addresses the

N
PI

audience.)
O
N
EE

AARON: Hi. My name is Aaron. This is the beginning of my

O
R

junior year of high school. I would like it to be wonderful.

VA

More likely it will not be. More likely it will be awful. That's
LL

T
EY

just a guess, but an educated guess, based on past experience.

PE

Not that I blame teachers. I love teachers. Some of them. My

R

first grade teacher for instance. I still send her a birthday card.
C
FO
R
M

No. I blame homework. I hate homework. And teachers who

IN

O
won't give you extra time if you need it. And talking in
G
A

class—because I'm a nervous wreck. Also group projects. I

R
TS

PY
really, really hate group projects. You see, I used to get stuck
C
H

doing all the work. Now I just show up late to group meetings
A
R

and try not to do anything at all.

T
SC

My relationships with my peers are problematic. You don't

H
O

need to point it out. I am fully aware of the fact. My

O
L

relationships with my parents are likewise problematic. I

don't think I'll go into that right now. The point being—
teachers are actually the least of my worries. Except they give
so much homework.
There was a time when we didn't get homework. Well, maybe
sometimes we had to write in a notebook or draw pictures but
the spelling didn't matter and my teacher always wrote me a
nice note which my parents would read to me since I couldn't

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 6 Carol S. Lashof
 
read yet, and then it was like not just my teacher was praising
me but also my mom or dad too, like it was my dad saying "I
love your funny picture of the pumpkin"—or whatever.
Wouldn't it be nice if that still happened sometimes? If, for

PY
instance, my bio teacher wrote a note on my lab report and my
dad read it aloud: "I love your funny picture of the cell
membrane?"

O
I miss first grade. Once we had to memorize a poem, and I
didn't even mind reciting it in front of the class, because I
loved the poem:
Fly away, fly away, over the sea,
Sun-loving swallow, for summer is done.
C
T
L
O
Come again, come again, come back to me,
O
O
H

Bringing the summer and bringing the sun.

SC
T

It's not that I don't try to do my homework. I come straight

R
N
A

home from school. I mean, what else would I do? I don't like
H
C

"extra-curricular activities" and I don't like "hanging out with

TS
R

the guys" and I for sure don't have a girlfriend. So I come

O
A
G

home. And I don't watch TV because TV is stupid. I just sit

IN

right down at the dining room table and I take out my books
M
D
R

and sharpen my pencils and I look at the list of things I have to

FO
R

do and I think, this isn't so bad, what's the big deal? And I
PE

think, today will be the day when I finish my homework on

EY

time—I'll even finish it before my parents get home. And they

LL
VA

won't yell at me. And I won't be stressed out. And after

R

dinner I'll listen to some John Coltrane, maybe, or Santana and

EE

I'll go to bed at ten, and tomorrow I'll be rested and cheerful

N
O

and I'll turn in all my homework and the rest of my life will be
PI
TO

happy, and maybe I'll even get a girlfriend.

ED

Wouldn't it be nice if that's what happened?

SU
IS

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 Clay 7

(Aaron sits on the floor cross-legged and begins sketching in his

notebook. ZETA enters at a brisk pace from a different direction.
She is also carrying a heavy backpack. She glances at her watch
and then pauses to address the audience. Aaron and Zeta do not
interact and remain in separate areas of the stage.)
D
ZETA: Of course I cheat. Listen. I'm taking AP Comp, AP
IS

O
S

American History, AP Bio—there's like three hours of

U
ED

homework every night for just that one class, Honors Math
TO

Analysis, French—only third-year French, because I took

N
PI

Spanish in middle school, then I switched to French in high

O
N

school because that's what all the other high-end kids were
EE

O
taking. Or Latin. Or both.
R
VA

Junior year. That's what the colleges really look at, you know.
LL

T
EY

If I was one of the seriously smart kids, I would've taken

PE

Geometry in eighth grade, so I'd be in Calculus by now. And

R

C
I'd be in fourth year French. And Latin. For instance, there's a
FO
R

girl on my crew team, Sophie Janowitz, she's only a

M
IN

O
sophomore, and she's first violinist in the orchestra, but she's
G

in most of my classes. So I'm behind.

A
R
TS

PY
I don't cheat in Bio or History because I actually need to learn
C
H

the material in those classes, so I can pass the AP exams. But if

A
R

I wrote every English paper from scratch and never snuck a

T
SC

cheat sheet into a French exam, I would just die. The

H

subjunctive? I mean seriously, what is the subjunctive? Truly,

O
O

I have no idea.
L

Don't warn me about getting caught. I won't get caught. You

only get caught if what you write yourself is bad and what
you steal is good. But my work is fine.
I just don't have time to do it.
People say it's pushy parents who are to blame for kids like
me taking too many AP classes and getting pneumonia. Or
having a nervous breakdown. Or both. Because we're up 'til
© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 8 Carol S. Lashof
 
1:00 in the morning doing homework and taking Adderall to
stay awake 'cause we've been up since 4:30 in the morning
doing Crew—if you want to go to an Ivy League, or any
school that counts actually, any school that anybody's ever
heard of—you'd better do either Crew or Lacrosse, and Crew

PY
doesn't require a tryout, just showing up. So I do Crew.
But it's not pushy parents. At least, not my parents. Actually,
my mom tries to tell me not to do so much. But she doesn't

O
understand. When she was my age, you could get into a good
college with a 3.5 GPA and 1300, maybe even 1200, on the
SATs. Can you imagine?
C
Also, I'm taking ceramics. I love being in that room—and just
T
breathing. How could anyone not love the smell of clay? O
L
O
O
H

Most people, when they talk about peer pressure, they mean
SC

pressure to do drugs and skip school and have sex. But that's
T
R

not the pressure I feel. The pressure I feel is the pressure of all
N
A
H

those other people like me, but better than me, about to
C
TS

graduate from high school and apply to college and it seems

R
O
A

like they've all done these amazing things, like swum in the
G

Olympics—swam?—or won the National Science Fair. Or

IN
M

both. And me, what have I done?

D
R
FO
R

Maybe I could be a potter. Throw pots for a living. Does

PE

anyone actually do that?

EY
LL

(Zeta glances at her watch again and hurries off stage as WILL
VA

enters. He looks at the audience and considers before addressing

R
EE

them.)
N
O

WILL: I have this dream where I go back to my grade-school

PI
TO

playground and I say to the other Black boys: Am I Black

enough for you now? Am I? Black enough?
ED
SU

Kindergarten, first grade, second, third, it was always Sophie

IS

Janowitz and me at the top of the class and best friends. Math:

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 Clay 9

when the other kids were doing drill-and-kill arithmetic

problems, row after row, we got to sit in the hallway with a
book of logic games, like figuring out if you told your parents
you'd wash the dishes for just a penny on the first day and
then double it every day—by the end of week three you'd be
D
making more than $10,000. Sophie and me, we figured out by
IS

the time we were ten, we'd be billionaires. Then we got the

O
US

giggles trying to decide how we'd spend all that money, and
ED

the teacher across the hall got mad about the noise and sent us
TO

back to our classroom and complained to Mr. Theodore about

N
PI
O

letting us be on our own in the hallway. But he kept on letting

N
EE

us anyway. He was chill. And he liked us, he trusted us—I

O
R

could tell.
VA
LL

T
The third-grade spelling bee: down to the wire. Sophie spelled
EY

"orangutan." I spelled "CONNECT-I-CUT," remembering to

PE

say "capital C." We both messed up on "vivacious." She beat

R

C
FO

me on "rhythm."
R
M
IN

O
G

This school is so big, if something gets screwed up, you can

A

grow old and die trying to fix it. For instance, last year, in
R
TS

PY
ninth grade, they put me in Algebra I instead of Algebra II—
C
H

and by the time I got moved to the right class I was way
A
R

behind and the teacher was pissed off about having to deal
T
SC

with me. He didn't think I belonged there—I could tell.

H
O
O

This year, my classes are mostly so boring I don't see the point
L

of going. No one notices whether I'm there or not anyway.

There's a computer that's supposed to call home when you're
absent, but mostly I can erase the messages before my parents
get home. My parents, they're always on me about college,
college, college, like going to a good college is the only thing
that could possibly count for anything ever. But they're not
the ones who have to sit in those classrooms every day. They
have no idea...

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 10 Carol S. Lashof
 
When I see Sophie with her friends, crossing the park on the
way to school, or in the hallway between classes, she always
waves and smiles but her friends, they look at me and they
just see "scary."

PY
I guess I'm Black enough for them.
(Simultaneously but with different ring tones, Aaron and Will's
cell phones RING. Their conversations overlap and need not be

O
fully audible.)
 
AARON: (On phone:) No, I need a graphing calculator. Yeah, it

C
should be at least a TI 84 plus but the TI 89 Titanium is better...
Yeah, I know how expensive they are... Office Depot. Or
Staples... And could you tell Dad I can't go to Grandma's with
T
him this afternoon, I have to see my history teacher. I know, L
O
O

but there isn't any other time.

O
H

 
SC

WILL: (On phone:) Hey... Cool... Yeah, I'm down... For sure...
T
R
N

Meet me in the park. By the fountain. Give me five minutes,

A
H
C

I'm there...
TS
R

(SOPHIE enters as Will is leaving. She stops to say hello, and

O
A
G

he puts his phone away to speak to her.)

IN
M
D

SOPHIE: Hey, Will.

R
FO
R

(Hearing Sophie's voice, Aaron looks up. He watches her.)

PE
EY

WILL: Hey, Sophe. What's up?

LL

SOPHIE: Bio Lab. You?

VA
R

WILL: Nothing much. Meeting some guys.

EE
N

SOPHIE: Don't you have a sixth period class?

O
PI
TO

WILL: Not really.

ED

SOPHIE: What's that mean, not really?

SU
IS

WILL: There's a sub. He'll show a movie.

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 Clay 11

SOPHIE: Still counts as an absence if you're not there.

WILL: Yeah. So?
SOPHIE: So maybe you should go?
WILL: What for?
D
SOPHIE: Get good grades, get into a good college, get a good
IS

O
S

job, have a good life, you know.

U
ED

(Pause. Will shrugs.)

TO

N
PI

Anyway, what if it's a good movie? My World History teacher

O
N

showed "Braveheart" last week, that was cool.

EE

O
R

WILL: I can get it at home on Netflix. If it's worth watching.

VA

If I've got nothing better to do.

LL

T
EY

(The bell RINGS. Aaron gathers his things and stands up.)
PE
R

SOPHIE: Whatever. Gotta go.

C
FO
R

WILL: Have fun pithing those frogs.

M
IN

O
G

SOPHIE: Yeah. Later.

A
R
TS

(Will exits. Sophie hurries off in the opposite direction. Trying

PY
C

to look casual, Aaron follows her.)

H
A
R
T
SC
H
O
O
L

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 12 Carol S. Lashof
 
SCENE 2
(Zeta and Will are in the library after school. Will is relaxed,
Zeta is anxious—pacing, shuffling papers, checking her watch,
etc.)

PY
ZETA: Let's start without him. It's 4:30. And it's my mom's
birthday, so I have to go out to dinner with my family tonight.
And I have a Bio test tomorrow. When am I supposed to find
the time to write a dialogue "using at least three verb forms,

O
including the subjunctive" en Français? I wish they wouldn't
give us group assignments. No one ever shows up.

C
WILL: It's only Aaron who hasn't shown up yet. I'm here.
ZETA: Which is kind of surprising actually since you're almost
T
never in class. I don't think I even know what your French L
O
O
O
H

class name is.

SC

WILL: It's Guillaume.

T
R
N
A
H

ZETA: Guillaume? That's French for William? That's weird!

C
TS

WILL: No weirder than Zeta. What's that French for?

R
O
A
G

ZETA: For nothing. I mean there's no French for Zeta.

IN
M
D

WILL: Oh, so your name is really Zeta. I mean, in English? I

R
FO

didn't know that.

R
PE

ZETA: See what you miss when you don't come to class?
EY

Maybe you should come more often. You might learn

LL

something.
VA
R

WILL: Maybe.
EE
N
O

(Aaron enters. Zeta sees him first.)

PI
TO

ZETA: There you are! Finally.

ED

AARON: Sorry.
SU
IS

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 Clay 13

ZETA: Listen, I don't have a whole lot of time right now, so

why don't we just friend each other on Facebook and chat
online tonight. But I can't do it until around ten. Is that okay?
AARON: Um. I don't have Facebook.
D
ZETA: Really? Okay. How about MySpace then?
IS

(As Aaron and Zeta converse, Will shifts focus away from them.
O
US
ED

He appears to be utterly distracted, staring into space or at the

TO

page in front of him, doodling.)

N
PI

AARON: Actually, I don't have internet access.

O
N
EE

(Zeta shoots Aaron an unbelieving look.)

O
R
VA

ZETA: What, are you grounded? Tell your parents it's for a
LL

T
school assignment. Let them look over your shoulder so they
EY

know you're not visiting porn sites.

PE
R

C
AARON: No, I mean at my house. We don't have internet.
FO
R
M

ZETA: Oh, I'm sorry.

IN

O
G

AARON: It's not like we can't afford it or anything. My dad

A
R

just doesn't approve. (Pause.) I could meet before school

TS

PY
tomorrow.
C
H
A

ZETA: I have Crew practice before school and then zero

R
T

period lab. So, maybe we can just write a really quick draft
SC
H

now and I'll run it through the translation program tonight.

O
O
L

AARON: The what?

ZETA: English to French translation program.
AARON: The computer will do that for you?
ZETA: Yeah, if you have internet. (Pause.) You really didn't
know that? Jeez, it must take you forever to do your French
homework.

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 14 Carol S. Lashof
 
(Will suddenly looks up and speaks with some excitement.
Aaron and Zeta are startled.)
WILL: Hey, how about this?
ZETA: What?

PY
WILL: For the play. We could write about a family. And the
different tenses could be different members of the family. I
mean, each person would speak in their own tense. Like,

O
Grandpa could speak only in the passé composé, and the baby
could be the imperative, you know, like "Donnez moi! Donnez
moi! Donnez moi!"
C
(Will acts like a baby, pounding his fists on the table and
shouting.)
T
L
O
AARON: Shh. The librarian.
O
O
H
SC

WILL: Or maybe Gramps should speak in the imparfait, 'cause

T
R

that's the ongoing past tense, right? And the grandfather

N
A
H

would be living in the past all the time.

C
TS

(Will starts walking around like an old man leaning on a cane

R
O
A

and speaking in a gravelly voice.)

G
IN

When I was a young man back in the blazing hot summer of

M
D
R
FO

'69, we were living in an old broken-down VW bus on the

R

mountainside and every day from sun up to sun down, we

PE

slaved away in the marijuana patch...

EY
LL

(Aaron can't help watching and giggling. Will straightens up

VA

and speaks normally.)

R
EE

Or would that be the passé composé? "We slaved away"?

N
O

Would that be passé composé? Or imparfait?

PI
TO

ZETA: What are you talking about?

ED
SU

WILL: The play. The play using three tenses.

IS

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 Clay 15

ZETA: A dialogue! Not a play. A school assignment! For our

third period class tomorrow. Which means we can't even
meet during lunch. And it's "Verb forms!"
AARON: Huh?
D
ZETA: "Verb forms," not tenses.
IS

AARON: What's the difference?

O
US
ED

(Zeta waves the assignment sheet in front of their faces.)

TO

ZETA: I have no frickin' idea. But it says "a dialogue using

N
PI
O

three verb forms..."

N
EE

O
AARON: I thought they were the same thing.
R
VA

WILL: Hey, I just figured something out. Passé composé?

LL

T
EY

That's the "composed past." The completed past. Over and

PE

done with. Unlike the "imparfait," which...hey, that means

R

C
"imperfect," doesn't it? So...
FO
R
M

AARON: Yep. That's pretty much how Madame Clark

IN

O
explained it.
G
A
R

WILL: Yeah, well. I probably wasn't there that day.

TS

PY
 
C

ZETA: (Rolling her eyes) Yeah, you probably weren't. Or on the

H
A

six other days when she repeated the same explanation.

R
T
SC

WILL: Exactly! Who wants to listen to the same boring crap

H
O

sixteen times? I'd rather figure it out for myself.

O
L

ZETA: Fine. Whether you come to class or not is your

problem, but right now, could we focus? I need to catch the
5:00 bus and French is not my best subject, okay? I'm getting a
B in Biology, that's bad enough. But at least it's an AP, so it
counts as an A. Anyway, what about the subjunctive? We
have to use the subjunctive and I don't even have any idea
what it is.

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 16 Carol S. Lashof
 
(Pause. Zeta is nearly in tears. Will and Aaron look at each
other. Will shrugs.)
WILL: Sounds like a disease. Subjunctivitis. Acute
subjunctivitis, a disease of the liver.

PY
(Longer pause. Then as if struck by a flash of brilliance, Aaron
dives for his backpack, which is under the desk. He rummages
through it for his French text and looks up the definition of
"subjunctive" in the glossary.)

O
 
AARON: (Reading:) "A verb form expressing a contingent or
hypothetical action."
ZETA: "Contingent?" Crap. C
T
AARON: "Contingent." That's like if x then y. Or, you know,
L
O
a contingency plan. And hypothetical...
O
O
H
SC

ZETA: I'm not stupid. I know what "hypothetical" means.

T
R

Stuff that might happen or might not happen. Like, for

N
A
H

instance, me passing French is pretty fricking hypothetical,

C
TS

and it's getting hypotheticaller and hypotheticaller by the

R

minute.
O
A
G
IN

WILL: I kinda remember this. I think I mighta been there that

M
D
R

day.
FO
R

ZETA: I've been there every single stupid day. And I still
PE

don't get it.

EY
LL

WILL: You use it, don't you, I mean, the subjunctive, when
VA

you're expressing hopes and fears and, like Zeta said, stuff
R
EE

that might not really happen? Desires. Dreams. Wishes. Je

N

souhaite que...Madame Clark turns into a mole rat. Je rêves

O
PI

que...Angelina Jolie is my girlfriend. Je crains que...

TO
ED

ZETA: Je crains que I'll miss the 5:00 bus. And je crains que my
SU

parents will be totally pissed because it's my mother's

IS

birthday. And ma mére souhaite que she were not turning 50!

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 Clay 17

WILL: And what do you souhaite?

ZETA: Me? I wish I had more time to do my homework.
 
WILL: (Disneyesque:) Don't you wish your prince would come?
D
ZETA: Oh, screw the prince.
WILL: Well, yeah, that's the whole idea, isn't it?
IS

 
O
US

ZETA: (Giving him a playful shove:) Oh, shut up. I've got a bus
ED

to catch.
TO

N
PI

WILL: Come on, what do you wish? If you could be anybody,

O
N

who would you be?

EE

O
R

ZETA: I don't know, me grown up and not having to do

VA

school anymore.
LL

T
EY

WILL: What would you be doing instead?

PE
R

ZETA: Ceramics. Throwing pots.

C
FO
R

WILL: How about you, Aaron?

M
IN

O
G

AARON: I want to live by myself in the woods. Work for the

A
R

forest service. Counting birds maybe.

TS

PY
 
C

ZETA: (To Will:) What about you?

H
A
R

WILL: I don't know. Too many things. An architect or maybe

T
SC

an engineer—but not software, bridges.

H
O

ZETA: Then you're in for a lot more years of school. Maybe

O
L

you should start showing up.

WILL: A writer maybe. They don't have to go to school.
ZETA: A writer? Oh, good. You can write our dialogue for
us. What do we have so far—a grandpa, a baby, and someone
who speaks in the subjunctive...
AARON: I'll be the baby. I can do that. (Pounding on the table:)
Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 18 Carol S. Lashof
 
(Will pinches Aaron's cheek.)
WILL: Gootchey-gootchey-goo. (Pause.) The subjunctive has
to be you, Zeta. The lovely Cinderella, sweeping the hearth
and dreaming, wishing, hoping, that some day her prince may

PY
come...
AARON: ...and bring her a pottery wheel!
 
ZETA: (Laughing:) Okay, okay. I'll play the subjunctive. But

O
it's almost five, and I really do have to catch that bus.
WILL: If you have to go, Aaron and I can stay and write this
out. Can't we?
C
AARON: Sure. I have nothing to do but 300 hours of math
T
homework.
  L
O
O

WILL: (To Zeta:) And I'll e-mail it to you after dinner. Okay?
O
H
SC

You can fix all of our mistakes and print out the dialogue.
T
R
N
A

ZETA: You guys would really do that? That would be so

H
C

great. You sure?

TS
R

WILL: Yeah, sure.

O
A
G
IN

(Zeta glances at her watch, then gathers up her things.)

M
D
R

ZETA: Thanks!
FO
R
PE

(Impulsively, she gives each of the boys a quick hug and a kiss on
EY

the cheek. Will grins. Aaron blushes. Zeta exits.)

LL
VA
R
EE
N
O
PI
TO
ED
SU
IS

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 Clay 19

SCENE 3
(Dimly lit corridor outside a closed door. Aaron sits on the floor
talking on his cell phone. His backpack, notebook, and drawing
pencils are on the floor next to him. From the other side of the
D
door emanate the sounds of someone practicing a VIOLIN,
performing very well but stopping and starting frequently.)
IS

O
US

AARON: ...because my grades are too good... Yeah, I know

ED

they're not actually all that good, but they're too good for the
TO

district to pay for the testing. Yes, that's what the counselor
N
PI
O

said. That's what I'm trying to tell you. She gave me the name
N
EE

of a private testing service and... Yes, I told her what my

O
R

history teacher said... yeah, about how he thinks I'm smarter

VA

than my tests show and... She said it doesn't matter. She said
LL

T
EY

a lot of parents want their kids to get tested so they can

PE

hopefully get more time on the SATs, and yeah maybe some of
R

them have learning disabilities, or maybe they're just stupid

C
FO

and... No, she didn't really say "stupid" exactly, but that's
R
M

what she meant... Anyway, the district doesn't have the funds
IN

O
G

so... Could you maybe not talk to Dad about it yet? Just find
A
R

out how much it costs first? Thanks, Mom...

TS

PY
C

(Aaron shuffles through his backpack looking for the appropriate

H
A
R

scrap of paper.)
T
SC

It's called...um...Educational Solutions or...

H
O
O

(He finds the paper.)

L

Yeah, Educational Solutions West.

(The violinist stops playing.)
Hey, I gotta go, it's almost time for class. I'll call you at
lunch... Thanks, Mom. Bye.
(Aaron turns off his phone and starts putting his things away in
his backpack. Sophie comes out of the classroom. She glances

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 20 Carol S. Lashof
 
down at Aaron as she walks past. He looks up but does not speak
until she has continued down the hall a few feet.)
Hi...?
(Sophie either does not hear or chooses to ignore him. She exits.

PY
Aaron finishes packing his stuff and then exits in the same
direction as Sophie.)

O
C
T
L
O
O
O
H
SC
T
R
N
A
H
C
TS
R
O
A
G
IN
M
D
R
FO
R
PE
EY
LL
VA
R
EE
N
O
PI
TO
ED
SU
IS

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 Clay 21

SCENE 4
(Art room. Night. The lighting is dim. There is the sound of an
old window frame RATTLING and then SQUEAKING open.
Zeta climbs through the window, then Will; they are trying to be
D
quiet and surreptitious but they've got the giggles. They both
lean back out the window once they are inside. Zeta calls softly.
IS

O
S

Note: it would be nice to have some real clay in this scene and
U
ED

for Aaron to actually roll it into snakes, but the work at the
TO

pottery wheel and related business should be mimed.)

N
PI
O

ZETA: Come on, there's no monsters in the art studio.

N
EE

O
(There is some reply from outside but it is inaudible. Zeta
R
VA

reaches through the window and helps Aaron clamber

LL

awkwardly inside.)
T
EY

AARON: This is breaking and entering.

PE
R

C
FO

WILL: We didn't break the window lock, it was already

R

broken.
M
IN

O
G

AARON: Yeah, because Zeta already broke and entered last

A

night.
R
TS

PY
C

ZETA: After that Bio exam, I had to throw pots. I was totally
H
A

freaking out. It was either break into the art room or throw
R
T

myself off the nearest tower.

SC
H

AARON: Okay, so you can enter a plea of self-defense. But

O
O

what about us?

L

WILL: You were sick for three weeks. It's not fair. You
should've gotten a reprieve.
ZETA: No reprieves in AP Bio. Ms. Frazier says The College
Board doesn't allow do-overs so neither does she, whether you
have pneumonia or mono or fricking leprosy.
WILL: That really sucks.

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 22 Carol S. Lashof
 
ZETA: Yeah, it really does. (Pause.) But it's okay now. We're
here. And now I've figured out about that window, we can
come any time we want.
AARON: Wait a minute. Even for Zeta, the self-defense plea

PY
only works for last night. What about tonight?
ZETA: It's my birthday present to Will.
AARON: Somehow I don't think that's going to hold up in a

O
court of law.
WILL: It's my sixteenth birthday. I'm going to learn to throw

C
pots. And you, Aaron, are the honored guest at my party.
You get to learn too. If you shut up about getting caught.
T
(Zeta leads the way to a large plastic tub of clay. She removes
L
O
the lid and takes a long, slow deliberate breath.)
O
O
H
SC

ZETA: Now everybody be quiet. Just stand here and breathe

T
R

and everything will be okay.

N
A
H
C

(Zeta stands still with her eyes closed, breathing deeply. Will
TS

stands next to her and closes his eyes too. He touches his thumbs
R
O
A

to his forefingers in a meditative pose. Aaron fidgets nervously.)

G
IN

WILL: OOooommmmmmmmm...
M
D
R
FO

ZETA: Cut it out. You're ruining the mood.

R
PE

AARON: If I get caught, my dad will kill me.

EY
LL

WILL: Don't worry, baby Imp. We won't get caught. Grandpa

VA

Composé and Big Sis Subjunct will take good care of you.
R
EE

AARON: You don't understand. My dad's got this look like

N
O

Medusa. He stares at you and you turn to stone. You should

PI

have seen him when he found the bill for my educational

TO

testing. He said we didn't have to spend $1400 to find out I

ED
SU

was crappy at taking tests, he could've told me that for free.

IS

WILL: Medusa? Isn't that a jellyfish?

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 Clay 23

AARON: In Greek myth, she was a monster with snakes for

hair. She turned people to stone just by looking at them.
(Zeta scoops up a lump of clay and throws it at Aaron. He
catches it awkwardly.)
D
ZETA: Go make some snakes!
IS

O
(Aaron sits down at a table. He starts breaking off globs of clay
US
ED

and rolling them into snakes. He plays happily. Zeta picks up a

TO

pre-formed ball of clay and hands it to Will. She leads him over
N
PI

to the potter's wheel.)

O
N

Okay, Will, I guess you get the first turn at the wheel.
EE

O
R

WILL: The wheel? It sounds like a medieval torture device. Is

VA
LL

it anything like the rack?

T
EY

(Zeta picks up a sponge and fills a small bucket with water. She
PE

sets it down by the wheel.)

R

C
FO
R

ZETA: No. It's exactly nothing like the rack. Now, sit here.
M
IN

O
Slap your lump of clay right down in the middle. That's... not
G

bad.
A
R
TS

PY
WILL: "Not bad" is good. Isn't it?
C
H

ZETA: It's...not bad. Now get your hands wet.

A
R
T
SC

(Zeta wets the sponge and squeezes water over the clay. As she
H

proceeds with her instructions, Will attempts to follow them. He

O
O

is awkward and a little silly at first but he gradually warms up

L

to the process. He begins to relax and enjoy himself.

Meanwhile, Aaron has progressed from rolling snakes to shaping
little animal figures. He is totally absorbed.)
Keep your elbows inside your knees.
WILL: Like this?
(Zeta adjusts Will's position.)
ZETA: A little more...there.
© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 24 Carol S. Lashof
 
(Zeta is shy and tentative at first about guiding Will. But as he
relaxes, she also relaxes.)
WILL: Oo, slimy and slippery.
ZETA: Pretty nice, huh?

PY
WILL: Weird.
ZETA: Now I'm going to start the wheel.

O
WILL: Uh-oh.
ZETA: Keep your hands steady, or the clay won't be centered.
WILL: Does that matter?
C
ZETA: Yeah, it matters! The clay'll wobble and get bubbles
T
and explode in the kiln, or maybe fly off the wheel like flubber
O
L
O
or an alien blob.
O
H
SC

WILL: And eat New York?

T
R
N
A

ZETA: Yeah, probably.

H
C
TS

WILL: Cool.
R
O
A

ZETA: No, it's not cool. It would make a humungous mess.

G
IN

And we'd probably get caught and then I'd never be able to
M
D
R

sneak back in here again, so just keep your hands steady,

FO

okay?
R
PE

WILL: Okay.
EY
LL

(A moment of quiet as he settles into the task. In the silence, a

VA

distant SIREN can be heard. Aaron looks up.)

R
EE

ZETA: Just use the heel of your palm. You're getting off
N
O

center.
PI
TO

AARON: What's that?

ED
SU

ZETA: What's what?

IS

AARON: That. A siren?

 
© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 Clay 25

WILL: (Focused on the clay:) How can you tell if it's centered?
ZETA: You just have to feel it. It's instinctive.
(Will concentrates on the clay.)
 
D
AARON: (Urgently:) Shh. Listen.
(Zeta turns off the wheel and listens. Startled out of his state of
IS

O
S

concentration, Will listens too. The sound of the SIREN gets

U
ED

louder. The moment Will hears the siren, his entire demeanor
TO

transforms. He jumps up, rigid, petrified. Aaron starts looking

N
PI

around for a place to hide.)

O
N
EE

ZETA: They're probably just on their way to a fire or

O
R

something.
VA
LL

T
AARON: Come on, we'll fit in this closet if we squeeze.
EY
PE

WILL: It's a felony.

R

C
FO

ZETA: What are you talking about?

R
M

WILL: Breaking and entering. It's a felony.

IN

O
G
A

ZETA: Jeez, you sound just like Aaron. Don't be so paranoid.

R
TS

PY
Even if they do find us, they're not going to charge us with a
C

felony. We're throwing pots. It's our school.

H
A
R

WILL: Maybe not if it was just you, or just you and Aaron,
T
SC

maybe they wouldn't charge either of you with a felony...

H
O
O

(The SIREN stops. Police lights flash through the window. We

L

can hear voices but no discernible words.)

My dad will die. For real. His heart will totally break.
(Finally Zeta too becomes anxious. She looks around.)
ZETA: They'll know someone's here...
(Silence.)
You guys hide. I'm the one that dragged you both here.

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 26 Carol S. Lashof
 
WILL: Don't you think they've heard our voices by now? No
way they'd believe there was only you here, Zeta.
(For a moment all three of them stand frozen. The sounds of
FOOTSTEPS and VOICES come closer. Aaron is the first to

PY
move. He pulls Will towards the closet.)
AARON: Yeah. But they might believe there was only Zeta
and me. Come on, Will. Into the closet.

O
WILL: But
AARON: In you go, gramps.
WILL: But your dad...the Medusa?
C
AARON: Medusa's a myth. Or a jellyfish. Whatever. No
T
heart to break. Go on. Hurry, before the cops come. L
O
O
O
H

(Will climbs over art supplies and into the back of the closet.
SC

Aaron closes the door.)

T
R
N
A

Au revoir. See you in French class tomorrow...or, no, probably

H
C

not... (To Zeta:) How long do you think they'll suspend us for?
TS
R
O
A

ZETA: I don't know.

G

 
IN

AARON: (To Will:) You'd better go to class every day and take
M
D
R

notes for us until we get back!

FO
R
PE

WILL: I always go to class when there's a good reason.

EY

AARON: Seriously. I mean it. Zeta's GPA is at stake.

LL
VA

ZETA: It's okay. I hear there's a really good ceramics program

R

at this little college in the Midwest somewhere. No place

EE
N

you've ever heard of.

O
PI

WILL: I'll take good notes. I promise. And pick up your

TO

homework assignments for you and all of that.

ED
SU

(Aaron closes the door to the closet and sits down at the potter's
IS

wheel.)

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 Clay 27

AARON: My turn at the wheel!

(Zeta clears Will's clay off the wheel. She takes another ball
from the tub. Aaron holds his hands out for it.)
Gimme!
D
(As the lights fade to darkness, Zeta begins to instruct Aaron on
IS

O
the use of the wheel.)
US
ED

ZETA: Okay, plop your clay down right there in the center...
TO

(We see the beams from police flashlights and hear the VOICES
N
PI
O

of police officers, and then blackout.)

N
EE

O
R
VA
LL

T
EY
PE
R

C
FO
R
M
IN

O
G
A
R
TS

PY
C
H
A
R
T
SC
H
O
O
L

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 28 Carol S. Lashof
 
SCENE 5
(Dimly lit corridor outside a closed door. Aaron sits on the floor
huddled into himself. He sketches in a notebook. From the other
side of the door come the sounds of someone practicing a

PY
VIOLIN, fast and furious. Abruptly, the sounds of practicing
cease, and Sophie emerges into the corridor. She starts to walk
past Aaron then stops and looks at him hard.)
SOPHIE: Are you stalking me?

O
AARON: Huh? No!

C
SOPHIE: Then what are you doing here all the time? Every
morning.
T
AARON: Not last week. I wasn't here last week.
L
O
O

SOPHIE: Whatever.
O
H
SC

AARON: It's just a quiet place to sit. My dad drops me off

T
R
N

early on his way to work.

A
H
C

SOPHIE: I see you in the afternoons sometimes too.

TS
R
O
A

(Aaron scrambles to his feet, dropping his notebook. Sophie

G
IN

picks it up and looks at the picture.)

M
D
R

Is this your dad?

FO
R

AARON: Yeah.
PE
EY

SOPHIE: Is that steam coming out of his ears?

LL
VA

AARON: Yeah.
R
EE

SOPHIE: What's he so mad about?

N
O

AARON: Me getting suspended for a week.

PI
TO

SOPHIE: For what?

ED
SU

AARON: Trespassing.
IS

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 Clay 29

SOPHIE: Trespassing? (Pause:) Hey, I know who you are.

You're the guy who broke into the art room with Zeta! Aaron,
right?
AARON: Yeah. That's me.
D
SOPHIE: What a pair of idiots! You're lucky you didn't get
IS

charged with a felony.

O
US
ED

AARON: Yeah. Lucky. I'm grounded for the rest of my life

though.
TO

N
PI

SOPHIE: You could've been expelled.

O
N
EE

(Sophie turns to go. Aaron speaks quickly.)

O
R
VA

AARON: You're Sophie, right? You're in AP Bio with Zeta?

LL

T
EY

SOPHIE: Yeah. That's me.

PE

AARON: And you're the best violinist in the orchestra, right?

R

C
FO

First violin or first chair or something? Zeta said—

 
R
M

SOPHIE: (Cutting him off:) No, not anymore. Not after the
IN

O
G

concert last week. I got moved. Demoted.

A
R
TS

PY
AARON: Oh. Sorry.
C
H

SOPHIE: I need to practice more. Manage my time better. Or

A
R

something.
T
SC

AARON: Oh. Sorry. I mean, you sound really great to me.

H
O
O

SOPHIE: Whatever.
L

(Sophie starts to walk away down the hall. After a moment,

Aaron follows.)
AARON: Hey, wait.
(She stops and rounds on him angrily.)
SOPHIE: Wow. You really are stupid! You wanna add sexual
harassment to your list of crimes and misdemeanors

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.
 30 Carol S. Lashof
 
AARON: No!
SOPHIE: Then quit following me!
AARON: You've got my notebook.

PY
SOPHIE: Oh. Sorry.
(Sophie waits for Aaron to catch up and hands back the
notebook.)

O
I like that picture of your dad with whole clouds of steam
coming out of his ears. It's funny.
 
AARON: (Grinning:) Thanks.
(Sophie starts back down the hall. C Aaron puts his notebook
T
away, hesitates.)
L
O
O

See you around?

O
H
SC

SOPHIE: Maybe. Let me know when you get ready to stage

T
R
N

your next prison break. (Pause.) Only you guys broke in,
A
H

didn't you? And you really weren't planning to steal stuff?

C
TS

You just wanted to play with the clay?

R
O
A

AARON: Yeah. Weird, huh?

G
IN
M

SOPHIE: Yeah. Kinda cool. But weird. Definitely weird.

D
R
FO

(Pause.) Was it fun?

R
PE

AARON: Yeah.
EY
LL

SOPHIE: Not worth getting written up for trespassing though,

VA

was it?
R
EE

AARON: Oh, yeah. It was worth it.

N
O

(The bell RINGS.)

PI
TO

SOPHIE: Hey, I gotta go. See you around.

ED
SU

AARON: See you around!

IS

(Sophie exits. Aaron watches her go, smiling. End of play.)

© Carol S. Lashof
This is a perusal copy for individual use and evaluation only.
Absolutely no copying or performance permitted.