Love Tarot For Beginners Romantic Interpretations For Every Card in The Tarot Deck Original Retailnbsped 0578193159 978 0578193151
Love Tarot For Beginners Romantic Interpretations For Every Card in The Tarot Deck Original Retailnbsped 0578193159 978 0578193151
Jhone Daniels
© 2017 Jhone Daniels. All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced in any written, electronic, recording, or
photocopying form without written permission of the author.
Disclaimer: The information in this book is to be enjoyed as entertainment only.
Nothing expressed here should be taken as medical, psychological, legal or
monetary advice.
Dedicated to Eric, the King of My Particular Everything
Table of Contents
Introduction
Major Arcana
00: The Fool
01: The Magician
02: The High Priestess
03: The Empress
04: The Emperor
05: The Hierophant
06: The Lovers
07: The Chariot
08: Strength
09: The Hermit
10: The Wheel of Fortune
11: Justice
12: The Hanged Man
13: Death
14: Temperance
15: The Devil
16: The Tower
17: The Star
18: The Moon
19: The Sun
20: Judgment
21: The World
Minor Arcana
Wands
Ace– Three
Four-Seven
Eight-Ten
Court Cards
Cups
Ace– Three
Four-Seven
Eight-Ten
Court Cards
Swords
Ace– Three
Four-Seven
Eight-Ten
Court Cards
Pentacles
Ace– Three
Four-Seven
Eight-Ten
Court Cards
A Few Useful Spreads
Acknowledgements
INTRODUCTION
Tarot is fascinating and fun. I find it captivating enough to have kept at it for
nearly thirty years. What I’ve learned during that time is that most folks want
answers to questions about love, romance, and sex.
Of course, you care about your job or the occasional specific issue, but by and
large people want answers to questions such as “Does he/she love me?” “Is
he/she the right one for me?” “What's going to happen now?” and the daunting,
“Why are they doing… that ?”
This book will open the veil! If you have tried to read Tarot, you may have come
to the conclusion that only about a third of the cards concern themselves with
relationships and emotions. In truth, if you know how to look, all of the cards of
the Tarot deck have meanings that fall into the Big Three of Inquiry: Love,
Money, and Work.
Rare indeed is the book defining Tarot cards which focuses in a detailed manner
on the LOVE aspect of a reading, but that’s what we are going for here! Even a
true novice will be able to do a love spread and understand what each card
means vis-à-vis romance. Impress your friends! Dazzle your enemies! Win the
heart of The Queen of Cups!
This book jumps right to it, and while I do provide a short and basic traditional
definition before jumping into the Good Stuff, this handy guide is all you need to
finally KNOW what to think about that pesky Two of Swords and the other
ambivalent cards.
I am assuming here that you have a spread or two you like, and a technique of
shuffling that works for you. I have included some especially helpful and classic
spreads at the end of the book, but my focus with this guide is simply to give you
a romantic interpretation for every card in the deck.
I also include an “Outcome Card” context, which can be the most confusing
aspect of a spread, but remember: ALL cards relate to each other . A thrilling
spread with a lousy outcome card doesn’t mean all is lost. It just means: “Be
careful and smart.” Know that the best way to read Tarot is to tell a story with it;
each card is a chapter, flowing into the next. With practice, you will become so
fluent in this language you will see the story unfold in front of you, and when it
comes to love and divination, you will have a real leg up. But, before we begin, a
little background.
ON “REVERSED CARDS”
While there is a tradition that says it is “proper” to read cards that land upside
down (or “reversed”) with their accompanying near opposite meaning, I’m
saying it isn’t, and I am not alone. There is no “rule” that says you have to do
this, and frankly, if you are aware of the darker aspects of any card, then that’s
really all you need.
Just go with me on this. The Tarot deck is a beautiful mix of positive and… less
positive. They are perfect as they are, with both light and dark aspects built into
each card. Why literally stack these cards against you?
I read upright only. Life is complicated enough.
Bonne Chance !
Jhone
THE MAJOR ARCANA
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Faith, chance-taking, foolishness, and things that work out in spite of lack of
savvy. Risking all. Fearlessness. Spiritual Journey.
LOVE READING
Oh, The Fool. If he is the Querent (the question asker): his heart is sewn to his
sleeve with the reddest of threads! His utter willingness to throw himself into
love without being mindful of the possible painful consequences is the stuff of
romantic legend! Conversely, maybe you are blind to the faults of your
paramour? Maybe you have a crush on an appealing and quirky character that
falls somewhere between eccentric artist and goofily appealing man-child (or
ageless manic pixie)? This lover will be unlike your usual fare, and he or she
might baffle and frustrate, as well as excite you, if you are the rescuing type
(don’t be the rescuing type).
It’s likely that they are great fun, and very inventive in the sack, while also
scattered and a bit disorganized in their life, and yes, a bit immature. Still, fun;
that is until you realize you might slowly be turning into “Mom.”
Watch out if The Fool is paired with The Devil, as this can suggest addiction, or
The Magician, as this can suggest that The Fool’s innocent exterior hides a
clever con artist.
If this card appears in a reading with The Five of Pentacles or The Emperor,
watch out for a “bad boy” addiction. Trying to win the heart of the unwinnable
will only bring you heartache.
As a situation, it can mean complete and utter faith on the part of the Querent
that “things are being handled” by the Universe. Sometimes it’s a very good
thing to just let go and have faith in best outcomes, if only because it allows the
Beloved to come to you, rather than chasing after someone. (That’s also the job
of The Hanged Man, whom we will visit shortly.)
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Whoo, boy. Nothing is certain or settled here. Keep a positive attitude, pay
attention, and make sure you are not letting your deeply romantic heart blind
yourself to a bouquet of red flags being thrust in your face. In an otherwise very
positive spread, see this card as a sign to back off a bit… to let go and let them
come forward and do a bit of the heavy lifting for a bit. This is a dance for you
both to enjoy, rather than a forced march!
1: THE MAGICIAN
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Manifestation of desires. Magic. Power and control. Creating something from
nothing. The Trickster.
LOVE READING
Hm. I don’t know about this guy. He’s a bit of a smoothie, this one. A bit
polished. This is a man who always says all the right things. You know who
always says all the right things? Someone with a whole lot of practice! This is
the card of the Pickup Artist Community.
Sure. He or she might actually BE an impossibly attractive, hugely articulate,
confident, financially smart, funny as hell SEX GOD. Sure. They exist! Why
shouldn’t one fall into your lap? He might also be all those things and a little
concerned, say, about the true nature of his sexual orientation, and would like to
use you as an experiment while he works that one out.
Or maybe “I’m in banking” actually means “I’m a teller at a bank”, and while
there is nothing wrong with that honorable occupation, because this is the card of
the embellisher, watch out. Some people just don’t feel truly lovable unless they
make themselves seem very special. If you are willing to wade through that and
get to their insecure, possibly loveable core, you might find a person of real
quality there. Or, you might be off to the therapist for years! Only time will tell.
Whee! Careful, lover!
As a situation and NOT a person, The Magician is a Very Different Animal. In
this case, it is your ability to make things work and manifest in spite of
obstacles. It’s about creating magic in your life, because you simply won’t
accept anything else. It’s about creating a meal out of a near empty fridge to hold
the both of you over till a time when you are better off, and this is great. Just
know that you can’t drink from an empty cup forever.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
In this position, it is most likely a situation, rather than a person, and that
outcome is positive. This is snatching victory from the jaws of defeat. Savor it.
2: THE HIGH PRIESTESS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Mystery. Feminine power. Magic. Chastity. An emotionally removed woman.
Esoteric knowledge.
LOVE READING
Playing it cool, are we? Playing a bit hard to get? You or your interest are
holding your cards tightly to your chest, and you have no idea where you stand,
or are working hard to keep them guessing! It works, actually, and someone will
be eating out of someone else’s hand soon, but you can’t keep up this icy
persona forever, nor can you subject yourself to it indefinitely. True emotional
intimacy means getting messy, revealing your vulnerabilities, and indulging in
the occasional ugly cry.
This is also the card of the Inappropriate Crush. Your boss, your professor, your
friend’s spouse, oh my! So many opportunities for you to be miserably
unfulfilled! Maybe the inappropriateness of the crush is simply more about
wanting someone to be more than they can be, emotional-availability wise.
Sometimes we go for Mr. or Ms. Chill when we fear intimacy ourselves. If the
object of our adoration is an emotional wall, then we are free to fling ourselves
against it in delicious passion and longing without ever having to deal with the
complete terror of having your love actually being returned in full measure. If
you had a crush on Spock, then this dynamic might be your jam. This is a theme
that will come up more than once in this book, as it’s a classic human
experience.
One final possibility: looks like sex might not be a priority in this relationship, or
what was once very passionate has cooled quite a bit. Before you accuse a
partner of not having a high enough libido, pay very close attention to your own
behavior as a lover. Always, but always , seek to examine your own behavior
first before moving on to blame.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Ah. This is a card of “Stop. Go No Further.” Bummer. When this Mysterious
Lady lands in the outcome position, it means that all will not yet be revealed.
Sigh. This is NOT the time to keep asking the same question, shuffling and
reading and shuffling and reading and shuffling and reading and shuffling and
reading and… well, you know this sad and hopeful dance I’m leading here. Not
to worry. This is temporary. When you sense movement in the situation, you can
pick up those cards again.
3: THE EMPRESS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Luxury. Opulence. Fertility. Femininity. Romance. Marriage. Home and garden.
LOVE READING
Whenever this regal and lux woman shows up in a spread, I inevitably think the
same thing: “Hello, Bouncy!”
I can’t help it. The Empress is supposed to be an elegant creature, and she is, but
she can also be a bit unaware and clueless, too, as she is used to being taken care
of to such a degree that she no longer understands how the rest of us struggle to
live. Bubbly and kind and sweet to a fault, this hostess with the mostest is a great
deal of fun. However, don’t mistake what seems like wide-eyed innocence for
stupidity. She is anything but. She is just pure of intent in a world of cynicism.
But why “Bouncy?” Because this woman is all woman: very feminine,
voluptuous, flirty, sexy, and, if you aren’t careful… fertile. This means she is
great news if you are looking to become pregnant.
But for the rest of us who aren’t, no need to get nervous. She can also mean
traditional romance, as in that frisson that comes with the polar dynamic of male
and female gender roles, romantically rather than oppressively expressed. This is
doubly true if The Emperor shows up in the same spread. Also, it can be about
money and luxury itself, as in having the means to enjoy yourself completely
with your partner: to go where you want, do what you want, and the time and
freedom to do so. Also, lots and lots and lots of sex! Yay, sex!
If there is a downside to this sweetheart, it’s that she might have an
overdeveloped sense of entitlement of which she is completely unaware, simply
because she is used to living a very comfortable life. Still, she is a very good
hearted, generous soul, indeed. If your crush is this woman, traditionally a blond
or a redhead, then go for it. She will be an excellent companion, lover, and muse.
Just be sure to treat her to little luxuries as you can, or at least overlook her own
small indulgences. If you are the woman in question, enjoy and play up your
most feminine aspects, as they will be highly valued by your romantic interest.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Nice! This is one of the small groups of cards that tend to mean “And they lived
happily ever after!” Look for these other cards to show up in the reading to
confirm this: The Lovers, The Hierophant, The Sun, The Star, The Nine of Cups,
The Two of Cups, Aces of Wands or Cups, and any of The King cards of any
suit. In answer to “Will I have children?”, this card in the outcome position is
considered the strongest indicator of “Yes!” in the deck.
4: THE EMPEROR
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Traditional Masculinity. Leadership. Oppression. Rigidity. Power.
Overwhelming force. Conservative.
LOVE READING
Most of the time, The Emperor is a person in your life of great importance or
influence to you at the time of the reading. This can be a good thing. This can be
a neutral thing, if you get my meaning. This card can just represent The Man in
Question, and nothing more, except signaling that he is important to you!
On the other hand, if you are reading about character traits, and wondering what
kind of person you are dealing with, then I should give you both the good and
the… less than good!
The Good
If you like traditionally masculine, protective men, well, it’s your lucky day! The
Emperor is an excellent provider, often a leader in the community or his career,
and oh, boy, would your mom approve. MANLY.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Back to the beginning. A man who is currently insignificant in your life will
greatly increase in importance to you.
5: THE HIEROPHANT
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Tradition itself. The Church. Authority. Council. Commitment. Marriage.
Becoming an acolyte.
LOVE READING
The Hierophant is an interesting card in that it is greatly affected by the cards
that are also in the spread. In this way it is much like pasta! If it is in a spread
with many favorable romance cards, then it very often signals not only
commitment, but a possibility of living together or even an engagement. This
card paired with The Lovers, The Two of Cups, The Three of Cups, or any
Knight or King (or Empress or Queen!) pumps up the juju on that being the
likely future.
In the absence of these or a reading with many ill-favored cards, it can instead
suggest the opposite: a desire to retreat a bit, focus on your traditional pursuits,
and spend time with platonic friends.
It also can suggest a time of actual retreat! Going to meditate and drink cleansing
juices for a week? This would be the card that suggests now is a good time for
that and coming back renewed for a fresh start.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
As an outcome card in a favorable spread, a happy commitment is definitely in
the cards. In an unfavorable spread, this one might peter out simply because
outside pressures of conformity, and possible religious incompatibility, are too
great to overcome.
6: THE LOVERS
TRADTIONAL MEANING
Love. Passion. Sex. Choice. Soul mate. Temptation. Desire. Lust.
LOVE READING
Okay, now we’re Taroting with gas! In a relationship spread, The Lovers card is,
of course, unambiguously about love and all the goodies that come with. So, this
meaning is very straightforward and does not alter much from a traditional
definition. In other types of spreads, it can simply mean “a difficult choice, filled
with temptation,” but here it’s all romance. Not insubstantial romance either, or
the casual, playful, light romance of The Six of Cups, for example. This is hot
and heady stuff, fraught with passion and possibly life-altering choices.
Certain cards strongly affect how and in what way the Lovers will express
themselves:
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Hold on to your knickers! You are in for a fun time! Don’t blow it! Be present;
don’t live in the future. Pay attention to how this romance makes YOU feel,
rather than how much you want the other person to like you.
7: THE CHARIOT
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Triumph through might. Strong willpower. Good self control, culminating in
victory. Making a choice.
LOVE READING
Whoo. You really want this bad. You want it so bad you are somewhat willing to
ride a bit roughshod over the feelings of others. There is a chance here that you
might think that will sheer force of will you can make your desired outcome
happen, but remember, lover, there are two in this tango.
Another, less aggressive interpretation is one of choice. A case where this card
might show up in a love spread is under the dilemma of knowing that you have
two strong options for love in front of you and knowing that it will soon be time
to choose one. This can mean literally two people, or it can mean two lifestyles,
such as “Do you stay uncommitted with the potential fun of having all options
open to you, or do you take the plunge, commit, and reap the benefits of happy
coupledom?”
Just remember, either way, The Chariot is a card of might and self-interest, and
those are two things that need to be used very carefully in romance. A light touch
works best!
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
You win! Be a good winner, and remember that others’ feelings matter just as
well as your own.
8: STRENGTH
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Gentle force applied with skill. Strong character. The ability to master your
impulsiveness and be effective in the world.
LOVE READING
The lover that possesses the characteristics of the Strength card is a wonderful
partner indeed. As a person or a situation, the traits of calm, self-restraint,
wisdom, kindness, strong moral character, gentleness, perseverance, patience,
maturity, and attractiveness prevail.
The man who is represented by the Strength card is a dreamboat; the woman, a
gentle, wise, sexy, confident and intelligent paramour.
This is the card of the grown-up. Possessed of high levels of emotional
intelligence, this card represents someone you can introduce to friends and
family with pride. This is someone who doesn’t run at the first sign of trouble; is
gentle, but firm in their feeling; has learned from hard-won experience; and is no
pushover. Gentle confidence is the order of the day.
Don’t mistake this for dull, and, if you do , carefully examine your own issues
with intimacy. For some of us, when it comes to our love lives, the only thing
that feels right is conflict, and the only thing that feels normal is feeling bad or
confused or unsure. Sometimes fear of intimacy doesn’t show up as running
away from someone, but running toward the wrong someone. That way, you can
have the passionate experience of intense desire, longing, and “love” without
ever having to worry about the terror of having this love actually returned.
As an experience, it means everyone involved is sane, kind, warm, and wanting
the best outcome for all concerned.
This card boosts the good qualities of the positive cards it is near, and softens the
dark aspects of the negative.
It’s a great card to have show up in a love spread.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Everyone is going to play nice, or you will have the self-control, the maturity, to
do the right thing, in the right way, and handle it like a boss.
9: THE HERMIT
TRADTIONAL MEANING
Meditation. Time alone. Finding a mentor. Intense study. Arcane knowledge.
LOVE READING
Well, there is no getting around it: The Hermit is not the very best card to show
up in a reading, but where it lands, and what is near, impacts the meaning of the
card a great deal.
In the past positions of a spread, it can speak of loneliness, or a desire to
withdraw and focus on learning, personal interests, or education. Having this
card show up in a past position can often mean this time of aloneness is about to
end!
In the future positions, though, it can quite strongly suggest a breakup, especially
when paired with traditional romance cards like The Lovers, The Two of Cups,
The Nine of Cups, The Empress, etc. It is the archetypal rejection of intimate
connection with others, emotional unavailability, and emotional withdrawal. It
also can mean that you have fallen for someone who is emotionally very distant,
or of an anxious/avoidant attachment style. This means that they are quickly
overwhelmed by too much intimacy, or find it very difficult to access their
emotions and express them. These people need love, too, and often seek it out,
but sometimes they create pain and confusion for their partners, who are a bit
starved for attention, and frustrated that their Hermit lover doesn’t seem to
understand what they need emotionally.
Here is the good side to the breakup that results from this card: it’s good to know
when something isn’t working. It’s very brave to say it out loud and make a
change. Many couples, not happy, and not well suited, stay together long after
they should have let their relationship go, because they fear change, fear loss, or
sometimes, simply fear stating the truth! When a relationship isn’t working, it’s
important to fix what you can, or realize what isn’t fixable, and move on, so you
both have a chance at finding happiness elsewhere. Someone brave enough to
step up and gently end the unworkable is a good person, and this ending can be a
gift!
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
It looks like you will be uncoupled for now, but now is not forever! Take good
care of yourself while you have this time alone. Do fun things! Learn a new
skill! Rediscover yesteryear’s forgotten glory of Air Supply! Remember those
hobbies you abandoned when you fell in love? DO THEM!!! Also, quit
abandoning hobbies when you fall in love!
10: THE WHEEL OF FORTUNE
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Change of luck, change in fortune. Usually positive.
LOVE READING
Good times are on their way! At least they are if they aren’t so flipping good
right now. The most profound and basic meaning of The Wheel is that “this too
shall pass,” and this applies to love spreads as well.
When this card shows up in a romance spread, it tends to mean that a shift in
attitude or circumstance is about to happen, and most likely it will be a welcome
and lucky change! This is not a powerful or deep card, though, when it comes to
relationships. It’s more of a simple reminder that the road to love is never a
straight path, and there will be twists and turns.
Having said that, these twists are usually good ones, when this friendly card
shows up. Look for lucky circumstances to gently shift the tone of your romance
toward a more lighthearted and pleasurable time.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
This is a lucky card in the outcome position. It tends to be of the “wish granted”
variety, but don’t rest on your laurels here. This is a card of change, most of all,
and remembering there is no constant and learning to go with the flow is
important.
11: JUSTICE
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Legal issues. Winning. Issues of fairness. Equality.
LOVE READING
Justice, I admit, is not a sexy card. It often has to do with legal issues, which, in
a love spread, can mean divorce, custody issues, and other super fun stuff. Bad
news? You are in court. Good news? Looks like you win.
More subtly though, there are, in fact, interesting aspects to this card, as well,
and they are important in a love spread! For example, having the Justice card
show up, with its scales and measures, could mean that there are issues of
balance in your relationship!
Are you both on the same page? Is there good give-and-take here? Do you both
feel equally emotionally supported? Do you both contribute to the smooth
domestic running of your home? Are you the only one picking up all the dirty
socks? Who cleans the cat box?
The Justice card suggests fairness in relationship will be a theme in your life
right now. Whether balance is achieved depends on the other cards in the spread.
A lot of negative cards suggests that maybe you might be giving too much, but
what does “too much” mean? Isn’t that subjective?
It is! What matters is how you feel. This is a time when your purely subjective
feelings have a great deal of weight, if only as a jumping off point to get to the
heart of the matter. Issues of balance only feel bad when personal boundaries are
crossed. If you feel like you are being taken for granted, then you have two
choices: change your circumstance or change your perspective and, therefore,
your attitude. However, don’t ignore this feeling. That is the seed of a wicked,
resentful weed that will grow in all weather. Time to pay attention and realize
that asking for what you need is important. You deserve to feel cherished,
respected, and understood, as does your partner.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Fairness reigns! You succeed!
12: THE HANGED MAN
TRADITIONAL MEANING
A pause in the action. Needing to let go of all attempts to control. Sacrifice.
Peaceful waiting. Submission.
LOVE READING
This is a card of fascinating contradictions. Its message is one of needing to
behave in a way that is probably the opposite of what is instinctual for you.
The Hanged Man is here to tell you that this is a time where you cause more
problems the more you struggle, cause more loss the more you “try.” This is a
time of letting go; not of the relationship, but of any attempts to control the
outcome.
This is out of your hands. In a traditional Tarot deck, you will see that even
though the man is suspended upside down, his face is serene. This is you. This
needs to be you. In letting go, you win. In surrendering, you survive. If you are
pushing someone hard to behave in a certain way, give you what you want to
create a certain experience, or even to feel a certain way, then it will not succeed.
This is a delicate time, and whatever happens next will not be up to you. There
are certain cards in the deck that strongly reinforce this idea. If The Fool, The
High Priestess, Strength, or the restful Four of Swords show in the same reading,
then you need to be cool as a cucumber: relax, be gentle with yourself, and let go
of all demands.
If the Lovers card appears with this card, well, then you are really twisting in the
wind, and the fate of this relationship is out of your hands.
Control is a tricky thing. It’s like trying to sit on top of a beach ball while in a
swimming pool: sure, you got that baby under water for now, but eventually it’s
going to pop up, and you are going down. Why not, instead, gently hold onto
that ball as you skim the surface, letting it carry you across the water?
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
You don’t get to know that right now! This is the Tarot’s “Magic 8 Ball”
equivalent of “Ask Again Later.” Later, by the way, doesn’t mean in an hour. Be
still. Have faith. Let go. This is a card of beneficial outcome, but only if you stop
struggling.
13: DEATH
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Radical change. Rebirth. New phase of life. Endings. Not a card of physical
death.
LOVE READING
In spite of the less than cheerful nature of the Death card, I want to jump in here
right now and tell you that NO, the Death card is not all bad! A lot depends on
what else is in the spread!
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Here you go! Off on a new adventure! Not with Chad!
14: TEMPERANCE
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Peace after struggle. Moderation. Simple life. Good choices.
LOVE READING
I often say this when I am doing a reading and Temperance shows up: “This is a
card you don’t appreciate as a teen, but crave as an adult.” Why? Because it is a
card of contentment, peace, plenty, and surviving a tough time and still coming
out ahead. That sounds so BORING when you are young… but so, so delicious
when you are an adult.
This is also true for naps.
There are many people who just don’t feel ALIVE unless their love life is full of
drama. They confuse peace with lack of chemistry, and so don’t understand the
pleasure of the easy relationship. This is not a card of boredom; this is a card of
brunch, naps in hammocks on a Sunday, and good sex. Yay!
For the sane among us, who understand the value of this, Temperance is a very
welcome card indeed. Temperance suggests that things go well, really well, and
this is a person with whom you will even enjoy small, pleasant tasks, such as
grocery shopping and running errands. You “get” each other, and feel
emotionally comfy and safe.
It’s a great card to see in a future aspect of a reading, as it means that no matter
the struggles now, there is peace and happiness to come.
If health troubles are an aspect of your relationship, this card is a soothing omen
of good health being on its way as well, and soon!
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Best place for this card! No matter what, it’s going to be okay and you will like
the outcome. How cool is that?
15: THE DEVIL
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Oppression. Addiction. Obsession. Overindulgence. Difficult commitments.
LOVE READING
Okay! So, this one is hard to spin into an upside, for sure, but hey! Once again,
there are many facets to the Major Arcana, and even The Devil card can have at
least an interesting side.
Here’s an aspect that might be exciting: The Devil is the card of kink! Are you a
sexual adventurer? Open minded, as they say? Is your partner as well? GREAT!
The Devil card suggests this is going to be an aspect of your romance that will
be embraced with gusto.
Another possible positive is that The Devil symbolizes choices that are heavy,
but ultimately positive, like taking on a mortgage or a marriage, in spite of being
terrified. You are brave and strong and true!
But really, it pretty much stops there. The positive definitions above apply
ONLY in a spread that is otherwise sunshine, wine, and roses. I mean it.
Everything else in the spread needs to be unicorns and kittens.
If it is a mixed bag of dark and light, take the following cautions to heart: The
Devil card shows up in readings where one partner is oppressive to another; is a
narcissist; is verbally abusive, cruel or even physically abusive. I truly hope this
goes without saying, but if this is the case, put down the cards and go. Don’t read
about this anymore. It’s not going to get better. Take care of yourself and
immediately get away. You can’t fix this. You can’t make it better.
This is also the card of addiction and overindulgence. If you are unhappy at
home, it is natural to attempt to soothe yourself. Just do it in a wholesome way,
and yes, wholesome most certainly includes the occasional martini. Occasional
is not three a day.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Nope. Bad. No. Just… no.
16: THE TOWER
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Upheaval out of your control. Total collapse leading to rebirth. Outside forces
affecting you.
LOVE READING
Well, the good news is that this is the last of the major bummer cards in the
Major Arcana.
That is pretty much the only good news.
In a relationship spread, this card almost always means an ending is about to
take place. The majority of the time, this is a breakup or a similar
disappointment.
The Tower is a card of upheaval from the external world. You are not creating
this, so if you can, take comfort in the fact that it is NOT your fault. This is a
card of outside influences wreaking havoc on your relationship in some way: a
layoff, a robbery, or an unexpected and painful breakup due to outside pressures.
You are not the cause of the pain; you are just the lucky recipient of the poop
sandwich.
Here’s the other small comfort: The Tower card, no matter where it falls in a
spread (past, present, or future position), it is always NOW. This reading is one
of hours, days, a week or two at most. Whatever is about to happen is going to
happen SOON, and the sooner it does, the sooner everyone can grab their
brooms and start sweeping.
Is there ANY upside at all, here? Yes, but I hesitate to mention it, as it is rarely
the case: sometimes The Tower is here to knock you on your butt in a good way.
For example, you meet someone that is a life-changer and you both are
gobsmacked and happy. YES, it happens, but rarely, so put the kettle on and
know, deep in your hopeful heart, that it’s most likely going to be a bumpy ride.
Finally, remember, Tarot speaks in bold and big symbols. Just because The
Tower showed up, it doesn’t mean that your entire life will collapse. Not at all.
Sometimes it’s a fight that leads to enlightenment and new understanding;
sometimes the cat goes missing and you are both sad until you find one another
again. It is not always catastrophe. Take heart!
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Remember that part about breaking up? This position is when this is most likely.
Time to book a massage and drink wine in the tub and Netflix binge for a little
while. Onward and upward, Lover.
17: THE STAR
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Hope. Great happiness. Love given and love received. Bliss. Peace. Fulfillment.
LOVE READING
Well, now we’re talking. The Star is one of the most positive and uplifting cards
in the deck. There is no downside, and, in fact, like The Sun, it is considered
such a good omen that it softens the effects of any other negative cards in the
spread.
The Star is truly about hope, but it’s also about gentleness, openheartedness, love
freely given, and love gratefully received.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
No matter what it looks like now… keep hope alive. Wish granted!
18: THE MOON
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Dark feminine/mystery card. Occult magic. Fantasy. Illusion. Anxiety.
LOVE READING
Oh, The Moon. The Moon represents both the unknown and the willingness to
entertain obsessive imaginings to soothe your worst fears and anxieties.
In a relationship, it can suggest that you are in a place of fantasy more than
reality. You might ignore giant, waving red flags or live only in the future where
your beloved finally commits and is emotionally present; is more romantic;
suddenly wants sex again after a long, dry spell; or is simply not doing any of
the confusing, heartbreaking things they have been doing so far.
And you! You are not off the hook here! What illusions are you nurturing
regarding your own behavior? Have you blamed the other person entirely, not
looking at the ways you create pain or distance in the relationship? Time to be
gentle and open your eyes. Compassion is key, for both of you. Once you strip
away the resentment and blame, you realize that everyone is having a different
experience and isn’t seeing what is happening between you in exactly the same
way as you are. They might have perfectly good reasons for doing what they are
doing that you simply can’t see from your vantage point.
Unfurrow your brow and open your heart.
Dangerous place, the Realm of The Moon. When you live there, you live in
hope, but be careful. It’s not grounded in reality. I’m not saying there isn’t a
potential for a happy outcome, just know that whatever you imagine now might
not necessarily be what is actually happening. Time to pay attention to what is
really in front of you. You might be surprised.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
A mystery! When this card appears in the outcome position, it means that the
outcome is entirely uncertain, and will evolve over time. How frustrating! Hang
in there, and be kind to each other in the meantime.
19: THE SUN
TRADTIONAL MEANING
Happiness. Joy. Pleasure. Favorable outcome. Transparency in all dealings.
Childlike delight. The shiny light of truth.
ROMANCE READING
Glorious Sol! Here is an instance where the meaning of the card doesn’t change
much at all in a romance spread, and that’s wonderful, because The Sun, along
with The World, are the two most positive cards in the deck.
There is no downside to The Sun, except for the possibility that it is a flare of
light, heat and pleasure that can burn itself out quickly, if not nurtured. This is
the super-exciting new romance, the amazing first date, the moment you realize
you both really are crazy about each other, but having these other cards appear in
the spread can boost the power of this card, and make the outcome a bit more
sustained:
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Ideal. Whatever that might be for you.
20: JUDGMENT
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Big decision. Clarity with understanding. Leaving a dark time and entering a
better phase of life. Choosing to let go of what no longer works. Absolution.
ROMANCE READING
The Judgment card is a very welcome card in any Tarot spread, especially as an
outcome card. This is a card of promise that, after spending time in confusion,
uncertainty, fear, or worry, you come to a fresh understanding that is a welcome
comfort, relief, and new lease on life.
In a troubled relationship, it is a card that speaks of deepening connection,
forgiveness, good communication, and “Okay, let’s do this thing!”-thinking.
This is a card about picking a side and making a choice. Choosing is important.
Ambivalent feelings about a relationship are very damaging if they go on too
long. If you or your partner have one foot in, and one foot out, it feels like you
are playing it safe and protecting yourself or another from hurt, or controlling the
flow of the relationship, but it actually is very eroding. It can create the very
thing that keeps you fearful in the first place.
Ambivalence keeps things from deepening, emotionally, and it also stifles the
small, comforting, everyday “we are in this together”-feelings and pleasantly
conspiratorial experiences that make a relationship feel real, safe, and sturdy
enough to stand on. It creates insecurity and neediness even in the most stalwart
heart. It kills passion.
When you aren’t really choosing, nothing grows between you. Untapped
potential stops ripening on the vine and starts to whither, instead.
Judgment is coming down off the fence after much reflection and saying, “Well,
I don’t know what’s going to happen, but I am here, and I want you with me.”
As scary as that can feel, it creates a safe space, emotionally, to find out a
romance’s true potential. This is a great place to be, and this card suggests that
you choose and, in turn, are chosen. You forgive and are forgiven. Slate cleaned
and moving forward! What you do with that opportunity is up to you!
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Clarity after confusion! The clouds part! You choose to go forward or you
choose to leave , but, in the act of choosing, you find happiness and peace.
21: THE WORLD
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Ending of one phase to begin a new, brilliant life. Absolute fulfillment.
Happiness.
LOVE READING
Oh, The World! How I love The World! It is, most simply, the best card in the
deck.
What’s fun about The World is that, while there are a number of cards that are
very upbeat and happy and about good things coming (The Sun, The Star, The
Nine of Cups, The Aces of every suit), The World brings with its promise of
great satisfaction an added layer of deep fulfillment.
So, it’s happiness that lasts and change that is positive and consistent in its
benefits. It is a long stretch of good luck. In a world that is endlessly changing at
the drop of a hat, with each day stuffed to the gills with wave after wave of
expectations, pressures, overwhelming and often useless “information” from
media that batters our brains around like tennis balls, The World says, “Hey, this
thing? This experience? You get to keep it for a while. Enjoy.”
The World is also about achievement. So you pass through a time that was
challenging, such as graduate school, a hard internship, a tricky job situation, or
a complicated dating situation, and a true and measurable shift occurs, and the
results are beautiful. The hard work pays off. Things gently and easily fall into
place.
Good stuff!
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Again, best card in the deck. The World as your outcome card is the most
welcome card you could see, regardless of the topic of the reading. It’s the
embodiment of “YES!” after a long period of struggle.
THE WANDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
A new creative process. Starting a new business. A grand beginning.
ROMANCE READING
This is a theme I will return to at the beginning of each of the four suits, but it
should always be kept in mind that the Ace of any suit is the purest, most
distilled form of the fundamental attributes of the suit itself. It also symbolizes
the new, so think new influences, new people, and new ways of doing things. In
this way, change is good, even for change-fighters like, oh, most of us. Even
when we get to the dark and contemplative Swords, there is still reason for hope,
as you will learn as you read on!
Aces are always welcome. They soften the blows of the dark cards and add to
the positive cards with new, fresh, and concentrated energy.
To start, the Ace of Wands is clearly a phallic symbol. For those of us who
appreciate the phallus, this is nice. You have the hots for each other. Sexual
mojo.
In a love reading, the Ace of Wands suggests a new beginning, whether in the
form of a new romance, or a new phase in an existing one. It also suggests strong
sexual chemistry, regardless of whether your relationship is one of opposite or
same gender. Even more, er, lastingly, it suggests excellent, easy, non-stressful
communication, which is a sorely underrated bit of wonderfulness.
If you have something important to say to someone special, the Ace of Wands is
here to tell you that you have the skills to communicate effectively, charmingly,
and possibly to the point of removal of clothing, you sweet-talking devil!
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Sexy times for you, with lots of warm connection to follow! This one’s a
cuddler!
TWO OF WANDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Imposition of power. All the responsibility, but none of the authority. Bluffing in
order to seem important.
ROMANTIC READING
Are you trying to impose your will on another? Is someone trying to control the
relationship in a stubborn or selfish manner? The dull, often pedantic and mildly
crazy-making oppressiveness of the Two of Wands suggests that some rather
tiresome, insecure behavior is at hand. Sure, you or they might get their way, but
it’s at great expense, such as the respect another might have for you.
This is the mean little brother of the worst aspects of The Chariot, so if they are
in the same spread, watch out for thoughtless and selfish behavior. These are
petty control issues and unreasonable expectations, such as needing to know
where your partner is at all times, expecting texts to be answered instantly, or
needing three calls a day. Super fun, and WAY conducive to romance, no?
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Bleh, on it’s own. The tiresome behavior listed above continues. Carefully look
at the other cards in the spread to see how this might play out. Lots of happy
cards suggest this is just a blip, but mixed or negative spreads suggest you might
be falling for a rigid and controlling person…unless that person is you! YOU
ARE NOT THAT PERSON . You are so much cooler than that. You are secure,
calm, trusting with time and utterly trustworthy yourself, and wow, that’s really
attractive, isn’t it?
THREE OF WANDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Excellent leadership. New, positive levels of responsibility coming to you. New
opportunities to show off your skills.
ROMANTIC READING
Ah. This is the card the Two of Wands pretends to be, but fails. This is someone
who is competent, calm and kind, and it’s the nice little brother of the Strength
card. This means enjoying the comfort that comes with a person who is a grown
up or a situation that is comforting and competent.
This is the man that makes the reservations, shows up on time, and smells like
soap and good manners (they smell like victory), but who might also have
hidden, sexy tattoos underneath his crisp, button-down shirt. This man knows
what he is about. He’s a good kisser. He takes good care of his pets. He can cook
at least one really good meal. He wants to cook it for you.
As a situation, it means dating someone who makes you feel like an adult having
a good time, rather than a kid playing at dating. Relax, and enjoy.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Yes. Keep seeing this person. This card with the Three of Pentacles or any good
Cups card is sturdy romantic stuff, indeed.
FOUR OF WANDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Engagement, happy home life, new home, surprise happiness.
ROMANTIC READING
Oh, this is a little sweetie of a card. In a traditional deck, it shows two couples
dancing under a chuppah, which is the small, four-posted tent-like structure used
in a Jewish wedding. This is a card of celebration, a happy surprise that is not an
unexpected outcome, but one that is even BETTER than your hopeful
expectations.
It doesn’t mean marriage, necessarily, but it certainly does mean a happy union,
and it’s a wonderful omen to show up in any spread. Paired with the Lovers or
Two of Cups or Hierophant, though…yes, a commitment might be on the table,
whether it’s the very first levels of this, such as romantic exclusivity, or even the
Whole Beautiful Terrifying Catastrophe we won’t even name yet (because we
aren’t getting ahead of ourselves, are we?). It certainly bodes well for any
romance.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Happy Surprise! Fun! Celebration! Going Steady! Being claimed!
FIVE OF WANDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Competition. Playful fighting but hey, you might take an eye out! Struggle.
LOVE READING
Do you like to be right?
By this I mean, do you like to be right more than you like to be happy?
..and by THIS I mean, are you aware that beating someone into submission with
a verbal Hammer of Self Righteousness is not actually conducive to intimacy or
closeness?
Or, are you under the hammer yourself? No good. Someone is overwhelming
someone else with a need to win at all costs. Even if they, or you, might think it’s
playful banter, it’s actually exhausting to the other person. Both of your needs
matter equally. If not, it’s really just mental masturbation for the person doing
the hammering.
Don’t let your desire to be heard turn into a need to shut up your partner.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Hm. Changeable. You are stuck right in the middle of the battle of wills. I wish I
could tell you who will win, but I can’t. And in love, really, shouldn’t both of
you win? This might just be a single argument, so don’t fret. Just pay attention,
with careful, measured observation.
SIX OF WANDS
TRADITIONAL READING
Victory. Triumph. Winning.
ROMANCE READING
So. This is a card of happiness and a sense of achievement. In traditional Tarot a
knight is riding through town in the center of a parade, with banners and laurel
wreaths all around him. Good stuff, but it is possibly of the shallow sort.
This is the first flush of triumph in a new relationship, a sense of “getting the
girl.” Negatively, you might feel like you are dating someone you think is “out
of your league.”
No such thing. No one is out of anyone’s dang league! People either fit in a good
match of character, interests, sexual attraction, morals, emotional needs, and
expressions thereof, or they don’t, but people are just people. Everyone is a
hairless biped. That biped you are putting on a pedestal does goofy stuff alone
when no one is watching, just like you do.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Be careful of idealizing either the person you want, or the relationship itself. Yes,
this is a card of accomplishment, but not a card of emotional connection, so this
is just a first step. Enjoy it, by all means, enjoy -- just know that it’s only a great
first signpost.
ROMANCE READING
Seriously, more fighting? Ugh.
Tiresome, I know, but relationships, especially more challenging ones, often
require more corrections of balance or difficult confrontations. Knowing if that’s
a worthy challenge or a futile one takes a bit of time.
I know. Sucks.
Depending on the placement of this card, it might be the card of a person being
more trouble, in the end, than enhancement in your life. Of course you deserve
success in love and life and to be happy. It would be so great to tell you this is all
going to work out, but sometimes things just go wonky for nebulous, frustrating
manifestations – or simply a poor fit. This is especially true in a spread with
many Swords.
On the plus side, with any of the positive Cup cards, this can mean you team up,
fight the good fight against outside foes and difficult life obstacles, and bond
together in a positive way. It can happen! Carefully look to other cards in the
spread to see if this might be the interpretation you can grab with your hot little
hands.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Hm. Don’t lose heart, but really DO step back and drop your stick. Everyone
needs to drop his or her stick (schtick?) and breathe a bit. Calm WAY down.
Remember, this is not your adversary. This is another person, someone you
LIKE, struggling to get needs met, just as you are.
EIGHT OF WANDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Rapid, sometimes overwhelming movement. Big change, happening very
quickly.
ROMANCE READING
Oh man, this is going really fast!
If this is a NEW relationship:
Buckle up, Buttercup, because you are about to be swept up in a whirlwind.
Sometimes, this is freaking GREAT, and all you need do is hold on and laugh,
because you have found yourself a perfect match and it all falls into place
because It Simply Can’t Help Itself.
This is rapid movement, sometimes of the overwhelming sort. Super fun, right?
Right!
Just…be careful, because this is new .
Be careful, especially, oh dear especially , if The Emperor, the Magician or ANY
of the Knights are in a reading with this card. Knights are all about rapidity and
change, which is fun, but in this case, it might be a situation of rapid seduction
with even more rapid departure. Keep your head, Lover. Slow DOWN . Pay
ATTENTION .
If this is a longer term relationship:
YAY! Unstuck! Your relationship was a four-wheeler stuck in the mud, and the
Eight of Wands is the friendly tow truck that just happens to drive by. Change,
movement, busy-ness and business move rapidly, invigorating the both of you.
New life, new experiences, and with those new experiences, fresh eyes. Good
stuff.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Everything I said above? It goes double, here.
NINE OF WANDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Pause before the final battle. Readying yourself. Exhaustion.
ROMANCE READING
Oh dear. It appears that either a relationship, or a situation within the
relationship, might be causing so much stress that it is hanging on by a single
thread.
This is more work than fun. You are not quite ready to throw in the towel yet,
but it feels as if one more crummy thing happens, just one more, it will be it and
you will be gone . You really mean it this time, dammit!
This is the card of the person who stays loyal when others would have gone,
stays in when others would have long ago moved on. Sometimes it works out.
Sometimes hanging in is a good thing, and you get past this very tough time.
You have the strength for one more go. One. You mean it. Really.
But dang, you are pooped.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
You are right on the brink. I’m sorry. It’s a painful and exhausting way to feel. Is
your partner or romantic interest supportive of your emotional needs? Are they
trying? I don’t mean words. I mean action? Then, by all means, stay.
If they aren’t, and you are there in spite of little encouragement or support,
please remember to take very good care of you , given it appears you are the
only one doing so. Also, don’t do that too much longer, Star Pirate. Here There
Be Dragons.
TEN OF WANDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Taking on far too much. Martyrdom. Out of fuel. Being ground down.
ROMANCE READING
In the card that comes before this I wrote that you had one more “go” to give.
Well, this is the place that is WELL beyond that.
This is taking on way too much , doing all the heavy lifting in a relationship, and
being the person whom people take for granted. It’s feeling very ground down,
possibly resentful, and totally exhausted.
Sexy, huh?
Sometimes, only one person is holding the two of you together because one of
you is in trouble. Whether it is suppressing your basic emotional needs for the
sake of peace, or doing all the dang housework, it’s about doing too much, and
gross imbalance.
Sometimes people like to be the person who does too much, and this can relate
to issues of control. Sometimes it’s an unconscious way to keep distance,
because how can you go deeper when everything is a mess?
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Bleh. There are many complicated psychological reasons why this unbalanced
dynamic might feel like “home” to you, but just because it is your past, it does
not mean it needs to be your future.
Consider the possibility that “things going well” might be secretly terrifying for
you. The higher expectations, the scary vulnerability, the unconscious fear of
abandonment and loss that real intimacy can sometimes inspire can be terrifying,
but that’s where the good stuff is too. The Best Stuff.
Please consider yourself worthy of the good stuff!
THE WAND COURT CARDS
The Court Cards of the Suit of Wands are considered to be the most appealing of
the four suits, because they tend to be the most balanced and emotionally
intelligent. There is a bit more Strum und Drang in the suits to follow (not TOO
much, mind you), but these folks tend to be pretty even keeled.
Traditional Meanings and Romantic meanings blend when it comes to the Court.
I will keep the focus on the romantic when we are dealing with the royalty.
PAGE OF WANDS
ROMANTIC READING
Traditionally a young person, female or male. A very young romance. Pages, as
a situation, speak of important communication that shifts a situation in a
different direction, but in the case of the Wands, this is less emotional and more
practical. News changes circumstances in a positive way. The warm letter. The
new contract. The good news.
As a person this could be you, if you are a young woman especially, or if more
mature, it could be a young person associated with your romantic interest, such
as their child. This is a nice person who is often accomplished, smart, and
driven. Traditionally, they represent someone who might have blond or light
brown colored hair, and medium toned skin. Attractive, and in a pretty much
universally appealing way.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
The Page brings news that brings good cheer. Kind young person in your life.
KNIGHT OF WANDS
ROMANTIC READING
Here would be your Golden God. He’s hunky and charming and good. He might
be a bit clueless because he might have been so blessed genetically (and by life)
that he just assumes everyone is as happy as he is, though not every Knight of
Wands is traditionally handsome. As a romantic interest, well, he’s pretty
dreamy to most people, even more for what’s inside.
Not usually the intellectual, but not dumb. Not even close. He makes others feel
at ease, and cares about the well-being of others. He is earnest and kind,
optimistic and extroverted.
As a situation, a Knight is always about the rapid approach of excitement and
change. Being swept up. Sometimes this can bring with it seduction and
abandonment, but the Knight of Wands is usually a pretty good man. He’s
sincere.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Excitement and change. New energy, or a new man. Rapid advancement in a
relationship.
QUEEN OF WANDS
ROMANTIC READING
She is what used to be known as a “classy broad.” Elegant, stylish and warm, she
is often successful in business, accomplished, and very smart. She is an excellent
partner and friend, confident, pretty fearless, and often entrepreneurial. Again,
tends to be light brown to blond hair, and medium skin, but that is just a
traditional idea, and hardly applicable to everyone.
As a situation, it suggests that there is more than enough emotional intelligence
here to handle most communication issues. She is a very kind and benevolent
presence. She’s a catch.
ROMANTIC OUTCOME
Court cards as outcome cards tend to be nebulous, and often simply mean “add
these attributes to the mix.” If you are mad for her (and you know she represents
a specific person), having her in the outcome position tends to suggest that
longing might be returned. Lucky you!
If you are looking for love, but currently single, she might be the person that is
on the way.
KING OF WANDS
ROMANTIC READING
So, take everything that is appealing about the Knight of Wands and bring it
here, but add to the witch’s cauldron the following: Emotional intelligence
tempered even further with maturity and experience, a career or hobbies and
interests enjoyed and pursued with gusto. Even better, add warmth, confidence,
emotional availability, and a healthy sex drive, well into later years.
Bubble, bubble, no toil, no trouble.
As a situation, he simply means everyone involved is a grownup, and
communication is good. Add him to Strength, and wow! Jackpot!
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
If you are looking for love, hold on to your hat. If you are interested in him and
know who he is, the King of Wands in this position suggests a real romance
might be on the table. He’s going to be fun.
THE SUIT OF CUPS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
New love, the beginning of a creative adventure, hot new emotions.
ROMANCE.
ROMANTIC READING
Ah. How nice. Lucky you. Just what you want, and it doesn’t matter where it
lands. Again, aces are always the most concentrated form of the essence of their
suit, so here is a big boost to the romance factor.
Aces are new beginnings, so this card showing up in a reading means either that
a new romance is on it’s way, has just arrived, or, in an established relationship,
a new and romantic phase or experience is about to begin. A second honeymoon!
This card is a super booster. It softens sad blows and gives the good cards more
oomph. If the Lovers card, the Two of Cups, or the Nine of Cups show up with
this, there is a “wish come true” factor to this combination, but be careful what
you wish for. Want that guy or girl just so bad? Are you sure? It’s always best to
pay more attention to whether or not you like them, rather than if they like you!
Should Knights, Kings, Queens or the Emperor or Empress show up in a spread
with this card, look carefully at the card, its attributes, its personality, because
this is a big indicator of the specifics of the Person of Romantic Interest who
might appear.
Should the Three of Wands, Three of Pentacles, Four of Wands, the Ten of
Pentacles, or the Hierophant show up with this card, there is a great chance of
“Happily Ever After,” and possibly some life changing commitment that causes
you both to thrive.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Oh wow…how exciting! The game is afoot! This is a real romance! A caveat:
This is JUST the “stars-in-your-eyes, everything-they-do-is-perfect” beginning,
lover, so keep your head on straight while you see if this has legs!
TWO OF CUPS
TRADTIONAL MEANING
Falling in love. Transformative love. Profound exchange of affection, fidelity
and passion. A superb partnership in business or play. Great working
environment. INFATUATION.
ROMANTIC READING
Yay! This is the little sister to the Lovers card, with the absence of momentous
choice between two loves or life upheavals that often come with the Lovers.
What you have left are the pure and sweet aspects of new romance. Where the
Two of Swords, as we will come to see, is all about withholding love and
rejection of same, the Two of Cups is all generosity, all passion, all pet names
and long stares and enough sex to have you walking funny.
And yes, that is all marvelous and stupendous but let’s take a moment to be
deeply grateful that this is a temporary insanity. Imagine if this initial infatuation
never settled down into something a bit more real. NOTHING WOULD GET
DONE, anywhere. People would starve, no work would be accomplished,
everyone would be nuts. Naked and nuts.
So thank goodness this settles down a bit. NOW, whether it does settle down into
hot, low embers or just winks itself out in a flash like a burning piece of paper on
the wind depends on the cards around it, and of course, the behavior of people in
question. This is a card of emotional greed, so be careful. Don’t gobble each
other up in one experience. Take your time.
Cards that indicate a possible flash in the pan: Five of Wands (possible seduction
for seduction’s sake), The Fool, The Magician, The Tower, The Devil, Seven or
Swords (duplicity), Nine of Swords (infidelity) and the Seven of Cups (self
delusion and fantasy).
Cards that indicate a possibility of long term romance and slow burning fires:
The Lovers, The Eight of Pentacles (commitment and slow growth), the Three of
Pentacles (building something together, living together), Four of Wands
(proposals), Hierophant (same!), The Sun (because SUN) and The Star.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
The Two of Cups is in a perfect spot when reading for the outcome of a romance.
It does not guarantee an “and they lived Happily Ever After” sort of outcome,
because we Star Pirates are very grounded in even our romantic fantasy, yes?
But this bodes VERY well indeed for you. New romance is coming, big time.
THREE OF CUPS
TRADITIONAL READING
Celebration! Traditionally, a wedding. We are off to an accurate start.
ROMANTIC READING
The meaning of this card is unchanged in this aspect. This is a card of weddings,
celebration, friendship, a feeling of being part of a group, being accepted and
wanted by a group, and possible overindulgence in spending and food and drink.
SO, what does this mean for you in a romance spread?
Well, it could actually be very practical! You will be going to a wedding! Friends
you really care for will be there. One of them might have a single and charming
friend. Flirting could happen!
Mostly though, it speaks of being emotionally well supported by people who
love and care for you. In a romance spread it could also mean that your friends
are the conduit through which you meet a Romantic Interest, so keep your eyes
peeled in a, you know, super casual, totally self confident, no big deal sort of
way.
Because love ain’t everything, my fellow travelers, and your friends will be there
long after a passing flirtation passes by.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Celebration is definitely on the menu. In fact, in the outcome position, this
celebration might very well be your own. Take good care of your friends, and
remember not to neglect them when you fall in love!
FOUR OF CUPS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Self-absorption and dissatisfaction with how things are going. A failure to notice
what is good and in front of you.
ROMANCE READING
Well. Hm. Someone is behaving rather badly.
Is it you, or is it the object of your romantic intentions? Where this card falls in
your reading will more easily tell you which of you it is, but regardless: someone
needs a shake up!
Why? Well, the Four of Cups is a card that speaks of lack of perspective, lack of
empathy, and nearly crippling self-absorption. Even worse, the core meaning of
this card is an inability to see and appreciate what is right in front of you.
In a traditional Four of Cups card, maybe like the one you have in front of you
right now, you will see a rather petulant looking youth sitting under a tree,
looking entirely morose. There are three full goblets in front of him, and even
more telling, a fourth one being held in front of him by a disembodied, angelic
hand, and he doesn’t even notice! What a weenie!
Do you have someone wonderful in your life who has many, many great
qualities but you are considering rejecting him/her over a very small attribute? Is
your own star-shiny wonderfulness being ignored by that self absorbed person
you are sure, just absolutely SURE, you can get to love you if only you’re just a
bit more…perfect?
If you are the rejecter (the weenie), carefully examine your own behavior.
Maybe, sure, there is something profoundly and fundamentally wrong with this
romance, and it’s time to go. But just maybe not.
You just might be rejecting someone great because you have an idealized version
of what you think your true love will be, and if anyone falls short of this ideal,
you are outta there. It’s a great way to avoid actual intimacy, isn’t it? Effective.
On the other side of this coin, you might just be dating a Jerkface. It’s true that
sometimes, when life throws us for a loop, we don’t manifest our very best
selves. People who are scared or worried or sad can be temporary Jerkfaces until
they get it together. Sometimes though, your Romantic Hopeful gets stuck there
and manifests as Jerkface 24/7. Take careful note!
It’s not your job to fix this. Not your circus; not your monkeys.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Prepare for withdrawal or disappointment. I am sorry. Time to run a bath, pronto.
FIVE OF CUPS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Disappointment. Loss, with something left over.
ROMANCE READING
Well, poop.
I DO actually have an upside bunny to pull from my magic hat for this card, but
I am going to have to reach around a bit before I find it.
A traditional depiction of this card is a man with his face down at a table, three
goblets turned over, two full goblets on a shelf behind him.
Is he drunk and behaving badly? Is he sad? Is he sad because he can’t drink the
last two goblets and wants them because he is greedy and self-indulgent? These
are all aspects of this card that can manifest. Not in actual drunkenness, but in
bad choices, disappointment in your own behavior or the behavior of others.
Also, tantalizingly, the idea could be that not all is lost.
The good news is this is not a card of devastation, or even a particularly
powerful card. It is weak, fundamentally, and this means that it is easily
mitigated by the cards around it. It also means that the sorrow depicted can be of
a shallow sort. A bad fight. Some cruel words exchanged. Not getting something
you wanted, but this lack of something is not devastating to you.
Also, remember this: there are still two full cups left. This means that you have
not lost it all. You have just taken three steps back. Time to take two steps
forward …and then keep going, because there is a chance this is
salvageable….and you are this close to dancing!
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
This is an unfortunate placement for this card, as it does mean the good times are
not coming…yet. But don’t lose heart. Forewarned is forearmed, and knowing
this blow up is on its way might be just the thing needed to dodge it in the first
place!
SIX OF CUPS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Nostalgia. Old friends. Returning home. A sense of safety or comfort.
ROMANTIC READING
Ah. A nice little break in a small streak of rather glum cards. The Six of Cups is
not a card of portent by its lonesome. It’s not a very strong card at all. But what
it is… is good. It’s friendly. It’s familiar. It’s kind and comfortable and well
known. It’s toast and milky tea. It’s a grilled cheese sandwich and tomato soup.
The Six of Cups is here to gently remind you, Star Pirate, that while it might be
fun to adventure upon the High Seas of Love, sometimes you need to take a
break. Watch an old favorite movie. Maybe go for a long walk with your dog
who is, by now, giving you the hairy fish eye because some other “snookums”
has gobbled up all your mental rental space for a good long while.
(Dogs remember when you had baby talk only for them, thank you very much.
They haven’t pooped in your shoes yet, because they love you so, so much. But
they have had, shall we say, dark fantasies.)
This is the card of self care, hanging out with friends and family and people who
love you already and don’t want to get into your pants.
Now, of course, because this is Love Tarot, there is an angle to this card that
might be romantic. When this card shows up in a reading, it MIGHT possibly
mean that you meet a quiet, cute guy or girl through an old friend. Could also
mean an old friend starts looking …different these days. How did you not notice
the line of his jaw before? Did she always have those eyes? Whoa.
It’s possible. Look for other romantic cards in the spread. If they show up too
(especially The Star), it can mean that the person you dig is a comfy and familiar
soul indeed. Soul mate? Whoo!
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
In this position, all things listed above still have relevance, but there is an added
emphasis on home and self care. Don’t worry, adventurer, you can ride the
stormy seas again soon enough. Grilled cheese and trusting dog’s bellies: Don’t
underestimate their power.
SEVEN OF CUPS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Illusion. Delusion. Fantasy. Wishful thinking. Sensual indulgence.
ROMANTIC READING
Some of us want love so much we are in love with love itself.
That is the essence of the Seven of Cups.
In non-romantic spreads this card is the card of either too much earthly self-
indulgence, or being all talk, and no action. It could even mean we are self-
delusional with regard to our own efficacy.
In love readings, it is all of these aspects as well, but it manifests as a desire to
have love so badly we might paint a thin, glittery coating of it over someone we
don’t know very well. We might throw it at someone onto whom we project
many fine qualities that might be there, or might simply be a collage of our
hopes and desires.
Ever fallen hard for someone almost instantly, and they the same with you?
Maybe it IS love. It is most certainly absolutely possible, and far be it from me
to say that you haven’t been hit with the true thunderbolt. I believe in The
Thunderbolt. I do!
But sometimes it feels like love, and it’s intoxicating, and you both go nuts,
gobble it all up, and then poof! It’s gone. You both are dropped on your butts,
scratching your heads, and wondering just what the heck happened there. Where
did all the feelings go?
You are both lovely people. You just aren’t the people you thought you were
“loving.” You are the people who fall in love at the masquerade ball, and then
find that in the light of day, in your street clothes, you have no idea who this real
person is.
Heartbreaking, I know.
So, when you see this card in the future position, don’t close down, just
remember that this is the very beginning. Remember that yes, they are so very
shiny, and that’s marvelous! Enjoy it, and then look deeper, and get to know the
real person there. That real person might be wonderful too.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Seriously. Watch that projection stuff. Infatuation is a POWERFUL DRUG, but
it does wear off, and the hangover is a bear. Both feet on the ground, please!
EIGHT OF CUPS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Losing faith. Leaving to start anew. Letting go of things that were at one time
very important.
ROMANTIC READING
One of the strangest aspects to the human adventure is the idea that one can have
the experience of loving so strongly, feeling a devotion so deeply, and
KNOWING in your heart of hearts that this is how you will feel forever and
nothing will change and this is YOU, baby! This is Your Truth with a capital T!
Right up until the moment where it’s not.
Some things are simply not going to last forever, and it is always such a
confusing and sometimes shocking realization.
The Eight of Cups is about change, often of the resigned and hard to come by
sort, in that it is the perfect expression of the moment when you realize that the
person, situation, or goal to which you were once endlessly fascinated and
loyally devoted has become untenable, and you are going to need to let go.
In a traditional Tarot card a man walks away from eight cups, late at night, while
a sad moon looks on, but this is not necessarily a bad thing.
Sometimes we stay way, way too long at the party. Sometimes we are loyal to a
relationship that doesn’t deserve our loyalty. This is the card that speaks of the
moment when you decide your heart matters too, and it’s time to go.
There is promise in this card of new devotions. This is not a card of desolation.
This is a card about the moment you decide to protect your heart and get it to a
safe place so that you can love again.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Yes. You are letting go, or soon will be doing so. Know in your heart that you
are making a good choice that is coming from good self-care, and that you will
be able to love again.
NINE OF CUPS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
The Wish Card. Wish come true. Careful what you wish for!
ROMANTIC READING
When you get a tarot reading, this is the card you hope pops up. It is the
“Happily Ever After” card, and very much Wish Granted. But, what happens to
the princess once she rides off in the carriage?
Before you go skipping along to the land of “Pop Tarts and Yoohoo for
Breakfast”, let’s be very, very careful about what you are wishing for, because
you might actually get it.
So, you want that man, or that woman, and you get them, and oh yeah, surprise,
they are maybe not so nice, or lousy in bed, or actually, once you get past their
great good looks, kind of stupid.
You want that affair with that married boss of yours? Wish come true! Now,
you’re fired. Good times.
I’m not saying that the Nine of Cups is the Monkey’s Paw of Tarot cards, with an
ironic and painful twist of an outcome just around the corner. I’m just saying that
wanting something isn’t the same as knowing what is best for you, so be careful.
The Nine of Cups can be woozy, self indulgent and short lived in its
manifestation, so look for grounding cards like Temperance, the Three of
Pentacles, Three of Wands, Strength, The Sun, or The World. All of these cards
are about moderation, maturity and good choices.
Still, if the basis of your desires is wholesome, as it were, this is a very welcome
card indeed. So go ahead and be delighted. Delight is fun.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
This is considered the very best placement for this card, bar none. When the
Nine of Cups lands in the outcome position, you will be celebrating. Wish come
true.
TEN OF CUPS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Happily ever after. Satisfying home life. Prosperity and plenty. Security and
beauty.
ROMANTIC READING
Now this is a straight up glorious card to have in any reading, period. Doesn’t
matter where it lands in a spread, either. In the past, it means you have a great
foundation for your coming happiness, in the present you are THERE and it’s all
about to happen, and in the future, oh boy, so welcome. Laissez les bon temps
rouler!
What is truly wonderful about the promise of the Ten of Cups is that it signifies
not only pleasure, prosperity and happiness, it is a promise of lasting pleasure,
prosperity and happiness.
Yes, life is about change, for sure, and rolling with the punches of this change is
a beautiful skill we all need to have to thrive, but this is a kind and gentle nudge
from the universe that says this is something that is not only going to pan out in
an ideal way, but is something you get to keep for a while.
Lucky, lucky you!
If the Ten of Cups shows up with any of these cards, expect your happiness to be
even more grounded and rich in expression: Sun, Ten of Pentacles, Three of
Pentacles, The Star, Three of Wands, Strength, Temperance, Two of Cups, and
yes, even the tricky and fun Nine of Cups. (That is a rare combination.)
Pair this card with ANY of the Aces and you are even luckier. Any of the Court
Cards, and you know who is responsible.
Even dark cards are strongly lightened. The Nine of Swords? Turns out your
worries are just worries, rather than reality. The Three of Swords? The sad news
you receive turns out to be one of the best things that can happen to you, in the
end. The Tower? The overdue clearing away of garbage to make way for new
prosperity.
There is no downside to this card whatsoever.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
No, really, you are a lucky, lucky duck. Enjoy that.
COURT CARDS OF THE SUIT OF CUPS
While Court Cards are often symbols of actual people, they too are symbols of
experience, and most especially so with the Cups.
PAGE OF CUPS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Young, sensitive person. Love letters, romantic news. A proposal.
ROMANTIC READING
While the Page of Cups can often be easily seen as a young and idealistic person
in your life, I have found that far more often this particular Page is more about
an experience you are having or are about to have.
The Page of Cups is a charming symbol of new love rushing in. Sweet, tender,
open, giving and innocent, this romance is sincere, mutual and loving. How
glorious this is in a modern world that seems to be made of hookups and chill.
This is mushy text messages and three-hour phone calls and infatuation and
kindness. You walk around with little clouds on your feet (to quote my sweetie at
the beginning of our romance), bouncing along with each step. Good stuff, and
genuine, rather than mere seduction.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Oh how nice. New romance. GREAT placement for this card, as it means you
might be on the precipice of an Awfully Big Adventure. Enjoy!
KNIGHT OF CUPS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Swift action and change. Romantic young man, dashing and poetic. Seduction.
ROMANTIC MEANING
Okay, Star Pirate, time to put your Reality Goggles on, because it’s very, very
easy to get swept up right now.
Of all the Knights this one is the most dangerous, because he is the most
charming. The Knight of cups is the Seducer, the Handsome Cad, the Wounded
Poet, the Talented Yet Perpetually Unemployed Musician, and every other
rogue-ish stereotype you can imagine.
And YES, he could ALSO be a tender, loving, genuine, warm dollface you
should snatch up like the smartypants you are and never let go. Absolutely. He is
rare and to be cherished. At his best the Knight of Cups is a romantic and tender
lover, a great communicator, a true romantic, and a real mensch. He tends to be
dark haired and light skinned, but this is only a traditional interpretation and
certainly should be low on “traits that are true” list.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Keep those shiny eyes wide open, and pay attention. Sometimes this Knight
swoops in with speed, seduces with skill, and then is gone in a puff of confusion
and surprised disappointment. This applies to all knights but one: the Pentacles.
Keep your wits about you!
QUEEN OF CUPS
TRADITIONAL READING
Gracious, charming, creative woman. Romantic experiences.
ROMANCE MEANING
Ah. She’s a charmer. At her best, the Queen of Cups is a sort of magic pixie
dream girl, full of wit and delight and creative expression and sensuality and
playfulness and whoo, she’s fine .
At her worst, she’s a bit moody and petulant and self absorbed and overly
sensitive, and whoo, she’s a little crazy .
It’s that kind of crazy that makes men nuts (in a good way) and other women
confused, but she is certainly attractive in a big way.
This queen is the artist and seducer of the Tarot. Delightful, quick, witty and
sweet, she is intoxicating and sexy and you are dazzled by her many talents.
As a situation, think of her as romance personified. She is the great date that
seals the deal, the “taking it to the next step” moment, the sparkling romance that
is full of light and sensuality and sex.
Not that she’s all pink and glitter, mind you. She can be gothy or nerdy or the
smoldering sexpot behind the cat eye specs. Her looks don’t matter. How she
makes you feel does. And making you feel is what she does best.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Oh this is luscious and heady stuff. A very sexy, romantic time is in store.
Downsides are few, but as always, keep your head! This is an exciting partner in
crime. Enjoy!
KING OF CUPS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Charming, intelligent and creative man. Romantic person. Gracious and kind.
Poets, artists and writers.
ROMANCE READING
What happens to the bad boy when he’s all grown up? Usually they go one of
two ways. They either never grow up and slowly stagnate and eventually
degenerate into middle aged lotharios who wonder why they just don’t quite
draw the crowd they used to, and are reduced to being a seductive but ultimately
disappointing episode in a number of women’s lives, or, they smarten up and
become a pretty tasty catch.
The best and worst of the King of Cups is revealed in these two outcomes, but
let’s assume the best, shall we? We can spot a playboy easily, because we are
savvy and sharp, and so know to avoid them easily. Right?
Right?
So, on the plus side we have a very, very charming, attractive, creative, sensitive
creature who might finally, finally be ready to settle down. The nice part is that
when he does choose to do this, The King of Cups is a marvelous partner indeed:
devoted, romantic, and loyal. Just watch out. Your friends will still flirt with him
and he might flirt right back. Harmlessly. Be of secure stuff.
The best way to keep the King of Cups happy is to make him feel desired,
attractive and appreciated. Notice the little things he does for you, and he will
reward you with devotion.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Hey, Girl. Looks like you have landed Mr. Dreamy McDreamboat. Way to go.
Just make sure he isn’t a Colin Ferrell in a Ryan Gosling costume.
THE SUIT OF SWORDS
Okay. There is really no way to spin this. The Swords in love are melancholy
indeed. Other than the clean cutting and fervent Ace, and the brilliant and
intellectual Court Cards, the moody and dark Swords are always less than
welcome in a romance spread.
All is not lost, though. Forewarned is often forearmed, and sometimes knowing
the pricklier aspects of a situation is a marvelous way to side step it entirely!
ACE OF SWORDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
“Cutting through the dross”. Surgery. Truth spoken bluntly. Honestly. Swift
change. Strength.
ROMANCE READING
Blunt speaking does have a place in romance. Yes, sweet nothings and ardent
compliments are to be treasured and savored, but there are moments when shiny,
bright truth is needed. This is where the Ace of Swords comes in.
On the plus side, The Ace of Swords very often represents PASSION. Like the
Ace of Wands, this Ace is a phallic symbol, though with, quite literally, an edge.
On the more challenging side, need to have a talk? This is the moment when
feelings previously hidden come to the surface with force and everyone soon
comes to know where they stand. When this card appears, know you are getting
the truth, even if it stings a little. After the confrontation promised by the Ace is
over, the air will be clear. This can only be good, no?
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Hot stuff. Serious infatuation. Strong lust. Look for these exciting feelings to
come your way… at least in the mind . This is an interesting aspect that can be
found in this suit in general. While the Cups are all heart, the Swords are pure
intellect. Without other suit cards to propel these feelings into real world action,
they might remain only thoughts, played with as a mental exercise.
Remember: Words are not deeds.
TWO OF SWORDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Truce. Stalemate. Temporary peace. Can mean balance in a difficult situation.
ROMANCE READING
There is just no way around this, Star Pirate. This card is a bummer in a love
reading, straight up.
The Two of Swords in a love reading is love offered… and rejected. When you
have found yourself in love with an emotionally unavailable or avoidant type, or
if you find yourself acting out in this way, this card will often turn up in a
reading.
This is especially painful if your romance started out ardent and warm. Why the
change? Why can’t they be like they were in the beginning? Some people just
have a short shelf life. They can only handle so much closeness before panic and
pulling back sets in. This can be particularly cruel in that this panic tends to
show up when things would naturally become deeper in expression, such as after
sex, or a particularly great date, or a wonderful weekend together.
Painful stuff.
Maybe it is YOU who is panicking? Be aware of how painful that can feel to be
on the receiving end of that. Maybe it’s time to feel the fear…and show up
anyway? The rewards can be great, in spite of how vulnerable and scary the
intimacy can feel. Only you know how ready you are for love, so just be careful
not to use someone else for emotional support, sex, ego strokes, and other
goodies while you figure it out.
On a gentler note, as is often the case in an otherwise very positive reading, this
card can sometimes show up when one of you simply needs some space.
I know. I know. Feels pretty miserable when mutual energy shifts into what feels
like a pursuit and avoidance dynamic, but everyone needs time to do their own
thing, and it’s good to give the gift of letting someone miss you . You know what
to do, right? Pull back, let go, focus on friends, hobbies, interests, and truly
know that this other person is NOT your Moon and Stars, and you have a rich
full life without them. Don’t ask about it, just let go and do your own thing. And
yes, this means seeing other people, if you can.
Very often this rather quickly results in the return of the beloved…but…
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
…sometimes it doesn’t. The Two of Swords in this position suggests the
emotional unavailability of your romantic partner will grow more apparent over
time.
Just know in your heart that “winning over” the one who is “hard to catch” isn’t
really a testimony of your value and lovability. You are absolutely lovable right
now. You deserve someone warm and open and really, really into you, so don’t
settle for Mr. or Ms. Unavailable.
So. Do your life, spend time with people who love you, and remember that your
newly limp lover is not the only person who will ever make your heart thump.
THREE OF SWORDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Painful Revelation. Heartbreak. Loss. Melodrama.
ROMANCE READING
While the Three of Swords looks like the Worst Card EVER, it’s actually not
that bad . Ok, it’s bad , but it’s not the worst. The Three of Swords is the
epitome of “sound and fury, signifying nothing”.
What do I mean by this? I mean that yes, it is a card that can signify a breakup,
but one that feels intensely painful at the beginning, but from which you rather
surprisingly and quickly recover. That perfect person you thought would be the
great love of your life? Meh! A few weeks later you realize this one is actually
sort of a weenie, and hey, look at that cutie over there!
The Three of Swords can also mean that you are blindsided by upsetting news,
such as finding out your romantic interest is actually married, or a drug user, or
has an upsetting criminal record.
Regardless, the worst has passed. Even if in the future position, this is a card of
hot, fast pain, shocking and over quickly. You will survive.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Bad spot for this one, I’m sorry to say. Try, if you can, to sidestep or prevent a
blow up of an argument, a painful surprise, or a mean and callous little breakup.
The nice news is, again, as painful as it might feel, you will right yourself
quickly like the cool cucumber you are, because you are well rid of that
experience.
FOUR OF SWORDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Rest, repose, and a break in the midst of battle.
ROMANCE READING
Two possible meanings here, depending on the cards that surround Four of
Swords, as well as the querent’s specific circumstances. The Four of Swords
more commonly can be a simple expression of emotional and physical rest and
withdrawal. Time to yourself, a break from dating, an emotional retreat. Love is
easy; dating can be hard.
There is another aspect to this card, though, that can be important. This card
represents someone who is emotionally shut down. This could be an emotionally
unavailable partner, who is cool in tone and lacking tenderness, or it can mean
that being in an emotionally, or, heaven forbid, physically volatile relationship
has caused one of you to shut down emotionally in an attempt to protect the self.
If this is the case, rest is not what is needed; action is your next move. By action,
I mean the swift removal of yourself from this toxic situation. Please take very
good care.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Assuming all is well otherwise, you need some downtime and possibly alone
time. Sometimes in the quest to find love it is good to take a break, and it looks
like this is the moment for that. Rest a bit and refresh yourself, so you can jump
into the fray again!
FIVE OF SWORDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Conflict and stress. Fighting dirty. Winning at the great cost of reduced respect
from others.
ROMANCE READING
Ugh. This is ugly fighting. Mean and selfish. This is the kind of fighting a
certain type of person actually enjoys . This is bringing a cannon to a knife fight.
There are people in the world who simply can’t stand a win/win outcome.
Someone needs to lose, and it must be the other person, even to the point of
being willing to take oneself down with the ship to achieve that dark victory.
Be very careful here. This is very toxic behavior, and the type of person who
desires to “win” at all costs is someone that can cause permanent damage to both
their victims and certainly the relationship.
Sounds pretty grim, eh? I won’t kid around here: I hate this card. Sure, it might
show up as just a snarly little exchange, but pay attention. Someone who is
entirely willing to cause deliberate damage with words is someone you don’t
want to press to your heart.
If YOU are the “win at all costs” fighter here…please become aware of your
deep need to damage in order to suppress and conquer. You might get over what
you said in the imagined heat of battle, but I promise you that your victim is still
shaking, and they WILL remember .
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
BAD. The outcome is one of suppression, manipulation, and toxic behavior. If
it’s one nasty, mean little fight, work hard to communicate better than you have
been, and maybe you can both quit treating the other like an adversary. If not,
please consider this a bad fit and move on.
Remember: misery really and truly has no place in love and partnership. It does
not make it more passionate or “real”. It simply makes it heartbreaking.
SIX OF SWORDS
TRADITIONAL READING
Travel near water. Moving to a safe place. Escape.
ROMANCE READING
The Six of Swords is a tiny island of calm in the sea of sharks that are the
Swords.
This serene card is a representation of blue skies after a storm, or a moving
towards a safer, quieter space. It can even mean a literal move to a new home.
This can manifest in a number of ways. It might mean that you find that the
break up of your relationship turns out to be a very lovely thing, because you
soon realize how unhappy you were, and now you are open to something much
sweeter that is now coming your way. Wonderful. Way to take care of yourself!
OR, it can mean that in an existing relationship, you finally decide that both of
you are doing this all wrong, and you are committed to the slow deliberate
growth that comes with changing hurtful behavior. Maybe you both go into
counseling and learn a different style of communication. Maybe you resolve to
change how you handle money problems or allocate housework. Maybe you
simply decide to let go of a problem that is more about having control over
another rather than actual resolution.
There are some problems that have no solution. You can choose to accept and
live in peace with that. The adage, “Would you rather be ‘right’ or happy?” really
applies here.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
In this position it is strongly suggested that a stormy time in your life is now
passing and you are moving to a much more tranquil and pleasant place. Thank
goodness. More of this, please!
SEVEN OF SWORDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Deception, manipulation, and playing both sides to achieve an outcome.
Cleverness wins.
ROMANCE READING
Tricky card, the Seven of Swords. In spite of the fact that it traditionally means
what you see above, it can also have a somewhat positive meaning as well,
which I will get to in a moment.
This is the card of duplicity. By this I mean that it is a card of using deception, in
word or deed, to turn the tide in your favor and win the outcome of your choice.
In business, this can be an excellent thing, and sometimes needed in a cutthroat
world.
But in love, honesty and transparency create the path to warm intimacy, so it is a
weapon that needs to be wielded with skill and caution.
In the beginning of a romance, this can mean the “best self” you present to your
potential partner while you are wooing each other. That is normal and to be
expected. It is the clever convincing you do when you are trying to win the heart
of another.
But, be careful. It can also mean that your potential romance or even existing
partner is not being entirely honest with you. This is ALSO the card of infidelity,
so if you are concerned that all is not what it seems to be, pay close attention!
So, even when you are acting with noble and ultimately sincere intentions, make
sure there comes a time when you drop the pretense and show your real self. You
need to know that you can be loved for who you truly are, because this “Cool
Girl” or “Prince Perfect” is an act you can’t keep up forever.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Time to pay closer attention to what is happening in your romance. The Seven of
Swords in this position suggests deception in the future. NO, this does not mean
it’s ok to look at their phone or email, suspicious and searching, but it’s certainly
time to have a chat. So have one!
EIGHT OF SWORDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Self imposed restriction. Feeling stuck. Learned helplessness.
ROMANCE READING
In a traditional tarot deck, the striking Eight of Swords usually depicts a woman,
blindfolded, arms bound, in the middle of a circle of swords. She looks helpless
and trapped in her tiny prison, but if you look again, you will notice that all is
not as it seems.
That blindfold is about to come loose. Those binds around her arms are loosely
tied, and the swords that encircle her like a corral are loosely spaced and once
she shakes off her bonds with ease, she might easily walk between those sharp
edges to freedom.
So why doesn’t she?
Sometimes we feel trapped in relationships, almost as if we have to stay. Yes, in
well-established marriages with children, this can seem very true, but even then,
you have choices.
For most of us, it’s just a crappy relationship that is going nowhere, or a crappy
relationship in a shared living space that feels impossible to leave, and this type
of trapped thinking is a mistake, and it comes from a feeling of scarcity…of
feeling like this is all there is, and the best you can do, so let’s make the most of
it.
Scarcity thinking is especially bad for new relationships, as it can cause you to
commit to someone who is far less than ideal simply because you feel like you
either can’t “do any better,” or worse, DESERVE any better, and so you settle,
and you settle hard.
I want to make it clear here that I am not at all advocating for flighty fickleness
and an endless “I can always trade up” mentality. That is also a barrier to
intimacy and love. There is everything to be said for making a commitment
strong enough that you feel emotionally safe and sticking to it. The idea that “we
are in this space together, and no one is going anywhere, so let’s work it out” is
great, and to be encouraged, but there is another side to this that you want to
avoid, and that is committing to a sucky someone because you have “invested so
much.”
Don’t let your “sunk costs” be your prison. There is such a thing as misplaced
loyalty.
Look carefully at your prison bars, and shake the door. It might already be open.
OUTCOME
Someone is feeling very trapped, even if they are free. Time to see if that can be
fixed, or if you need to take off the blindfold and run!
NINE OF SWORDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Dark night of the soul. Shame and worry. Fear of catastrophe.
ROMANCE READING
Wow, Star Pirate-Lover Person, I pondered how to approach this card, because
this and the one that follows are probably the most troublesome cards in the
deck, and I can’t have you feeling brokenhearted without at least some glimmer
of hope.
Firstly, all tarot readings are to be considered as a guideline for what could
happen if you continue on the current course. There is nothing set in stone. You
can change an outcome, or at least your part in an outcome, and this is relevant
here.
Secondly, well, let’s get to that.
The Nine of Swords is the 3am toss and turn in bed, deeply fretful that you are
about to be exposed in a shameful or horrible situation. It is the fear that you
have done something so stupid and you are about to get caught and it’s too late
now and everything is going to turn into a poop sandwich.
The good news is that with the Nine of Swords, the “world-shattering
catastrophe” is most likely all in your head, and if there are bad outcomes to be
had in the real world, they are most likely smaller potatoes than you suppose.
Nowhere near the disaster you imagine. This is especially true if very positive
cards are in the same spread, such as The Sun, The World, or the Nine of
Pentacles or any of the Aces. In fact, if the Sun appears in a spread with this
card…your worry is for no reason at all. Please stop torturing yourself!
The element of shame is an important aspect to this card, and you should pay
attention to it. If you have done something you consider shameful, it’s time to
right the situation as soon as possible. There is every chance you will “get away
with it” so to speak, but that doesn’t make your mistake any less, um, mistakey.
Shame is very toxic because, unlike guilt, it’s not about disappointment in what
you have done; it’s disappointment in who you are . That’s no good, and rarely
appropriate…as in, never.
So either fix it, or make with the self-compassion, pronto!
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Someone is terrified of getting in big trouble. Someone is fearful that they have
done a Very Bad Thing. Hopefully it will vanish like a nightmare in the morning
light, but otherwise, definitely get on that before it explodes!
If you think this card might be about how your romantic interest feels about you,
rather than your feelings about yourself, then I am sorry. This tends to mean that
the other person feels so stressed by you and your relationship that they are
avoiding all contact, feeling guilty about it, and are being generally avoidant. It’s
a childish response, but a common one, and again, a good time to take very good
care of yourself. Pull way back, and spend time with people who love you.
TEN OF SWORDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Cruelty. Crushing defeat. Worst is over. Total collapse.
ROMANCE READING
Let’s just put the kettle on straight away, before we go on, ok?
The ideal place for this sorrowful card is in the past position of a spread. Even
the present position is fine, because you will already be in pain and know what is
causing this to happen.
Alas, the future is just a crummy place for this to show up. This is a card of
absolute endings, cruel behavior, and yes, defeat, but there is good reason not to
utterly despair.
In a traditional tarot card, a man, grey in death, lies on the ground with ten
swords stuck in his back...but look beyond this grim scene. In the background is
a sunrise, and it is there purposefully to tell you the worst is over, or very soon to
be, and this is not forever.
Yes, this does suggest that someone will let you down in a spectacular sort of
way, but it will not kill you.
An otherwise positive spread will surely mitigate the pain represented here, but
there is definitely pain to be had. You might just get dumped, and it’s painful and
hard and you will feel a bit crushed, but not for long, and it doesn’t mean you
will never love again. That sunrise promises just that, so take heart, lover.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
I fear that if there were ever a card that said “…and they didn’t live happily ever
after,” it would be this one, so in an outcome card position the Ten of Swords
suggests an ending. I tend to believe things don’t work out for a reason, so you
might find in hindsight this was a blessing. Sometimes people we imagine we
want the most are directly in front of the one we are truly meant to be with, so
consider this one more obstacle removed on your journey to love.
Regardless, and again, take very good care of yourself, and know you are
entirely lovable, even if it is not happening right at this very moment.
PAGE OF SWORDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Younger, intellectual person. Cerebral communication. Cool personality
ROMANCE READING
As a person, our Page is one of cool disposition, even lacking in passion. This is
someone who lives in his or her head, and feels perfectly fine with that…thank
you very much! Highly intelligent and a fun person with whom to have long
talks late into the night, this young man or woman is not really of a romantic
bent.
You might find your Page frustrating, especially if you crush on a big brain.
They might be a bit clueless in matters of the heart. This person will make an
excellent friend, but possibly a bad romantic partner. I’m not saying that they are
asexual. I am saying though, that sex might be their only way of expressing
tenderness or affection, so if you are looking for affectionate warmth outside of
the bedroom, said Page might not be for you.
As a situation, this can mean something as simple as an intense conversation that
changes things in your relationship, or a cool reception to your romantic
overtures. Not necessarily a bad thing, but if you are looking for fire, expect
instead cool steel.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Most likely just a conversation that clears the air. Expect very straight talk soon.
THE KNIGHT OF SWORDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Unpredictable and wild young man. Information given in a tactless manner.
ROMANCE READING
Oh look, it's Danger Boy. Sigh. Handsome and charming and devil may care,
here is the one that will sweep you off your feet and then drop you as soon as
you start to get used to all the heady deliciousness of it all.
The sexy, but emotionally distant man that you want to "win", because he is a
challenge? This guy.
The man who gets recruited for the CIA? This guy.
Is that a promise? No. There are exceptions to this. Sometimes the Knight of
Swords means there is a smart, intense, and sexy guy is in your life, and he
doesn't suffer fools lightly. Can you match that energy? Then he might be your
guy, and you two can be the intense couple in all black that hangs out in the
corner at parties and wonders how long they have to make small talk before they
can go home.
Otherwise, you might find him a bit…frosty, if great in the sack.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
WHOOSH. What just happened? Did you get swept up in something that feels
out of your control? Hold on to your knickers. Things might be getting very
exciting, very soon.
QUEEN OF SWORDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Intelligent, passionate woman. Straight talk. Good friend. Elegant wife.
ROMANCE READING
Ever been called a bitch by a man…because you disagreed with him?
Ever been called...intimidating?
Are you, shall we say, a bit blunt with your thoughts?
Then you understand this queen. What others don't know is this: She loves
fiercely and strongly and would kick the butt of anyone who messed with the
friend she just chewed out for going out on a date with YET ANOTHER
unemployed musician.
The Queen has intellect and drive and puts up with very little stupid.
And, underneath all that beats a passionate and tender heart, indeed.
This is the Queen of Swords personified. She seems rather tough on the outside,
and she is, but she is a powerful, good-hearted, deeply loyal friend and partner,
and would make any man an excellent, elegant wife. Or partner in crime.
…He had better have a strong sense of self, though. Domineering, smothering,
indecisive or unambitious men need not apply.
She is traditionally depicted as a redhead or a brunette, but this is, again, a
traditional depiction, and should not be taken as a must in any way.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
The Queen will choose the right thing. By right thing, I mean she chooses what
is best for herself. Everyone else will just have to deal with it.
KING OF SWORDS
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Strong, intellectual man. Critical thinking. Critical words. Cool head.
ROMANCE READING
Danger! Danger! Danger!
Ok, maybe not DANGER, but…um, danger. Here’s why:
King of Swords? Sexy. Super, duper sexy. Highly intelligent, well groomed,
good in business, very, very competent. James Bond is the King of Swords
personified, at least at first blush, so you see where I am going here.
Attracted to the emotionally remote? Why, you can have it in spades, with this
guy! Yes, yes, he is super hot, and maybe you can win his heart, but really, his
heart belongs to Daddy…and he’s Daddy. Always. Also, be prepared for lots of
unsolicited criticism about, well, everything. Do not ask him if you look fat in
that dress unless you really want to know .
Is your self-esteem so shaky that only “capturing” the one hardest to capture will
do? He’s your guy!
The upside? If he truly loves you, boy, he loves you, but you had best bring your
A-game.
I find it rather exhausting, myself.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Expect some criticism to come your way. Whether it is justified, fair, or true is
up to you. Think carefully, and don’t let someone else dim your shine!
THE SUIT OF PENTACLES
TRADITIONAL MEANING
New business venture, the start of a new undertaking that is prosperous. Wealth.
ROMANCE READING
I really like the Ace of Pentacles a lot.
It's a very friendly card indeed, and while all the Aces have a nice effect on a
reading (generally making it more positive and mitigating the negative cards in a
spread), I find that the Ace of Pentacles is the most powerful of the Aces for this.
This card tamps down the negatives for even Big Bads like the Tower, or the
Nine of Swords, and can sometimes reduce them to mere unpleasant little
moments. In a romance spread, the Ace of this suit symbolizes plenty, abundance
and the freedom that financial security brings to a romance. It could be that your
suitor is prosperous, and that you will have luxe adventures together. This is
especially true if the World, the Empress or The Emperor is present. Just watch
out for the Emperor, as he can be very controlling with his combination of
power, entitlement and money.
If you are looking for an old school provider and protector, well, he's your guy,
but remember there are downsides to that kind of control.
Watch out also if this card is paired with The Devil. Money seduces and excess
is easy with this combination. Brace yourself for the hangover, if you
overindulge.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
This is a brilliant card to have as an outcome card. Happy days are here again!
Whatever your concern, there is a new, prosperous, and sensual change of
circumstance about to take place.
TWO OF PENTACLES
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Borrowing from Peter to pay Paul. Low on funds but light of heart. Juggling
work life and home life
ROMANCE READING
This card concerns itself with everyday life, so when it appears in a romance
spread you have a few ways to interpret it that are perfectly legit, depending on
the querant's circumstances.
In one scenario, this means that things have gotten a little stale. NOT BAD, I
want to be clear, but things possibly have become routine and comfortable and
that is both nice…and dangerous. Not only is variety the spice of life, but doing
things that are even a tiny bit new together, like trying a new restaurant or even
playing a new game or having a tiny adventure, can strengthen and deepen a
bond between couples. Try it and see if you don't look at your sweetie with fresh
eyes.
Or, in another interpretation of the Two of Pentacles, you might be at a
crossroads in the relationship and a choice will be made soon. Do you move in
together? Maybe get engaged? This card is a minor, rather than loud and
colorful, indication of this happening in the near future. It might not be the Big
Proposal, but certainly someone is thinking about upping the ante in your
romance.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Look for a decision to be made regarding your relationship. As this is not a
negative card, it will be a positive outcome, but maybe not momentous...yet.
THREE OF PENTACLES
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Moving from Journeyman to Master. Coming together to create something
important. Commitment.
ROMANTIC READING
Context is king with the Three of Pentacles, but in all romantic permutations it is
positive. This is a card sharply affected by the other cards in the spread, but it
does stand alone as a positive card, suggesting that a new level of commitment is
in the works for your relationship.
For a person already in a relationship, when this card appears in a spread with
the Usual Suspects of Big Romance (Lovers, Two and Ten of Cups, The Star,
The Sun), there might be an engagement or proposal coming within the next
year.
For a person who is single and dating, the Three of Pentacles suggests that more
than one quality person is out there for you, so take heart!
For a person in a difficult relationship, this card can sometimes mean that there
is a third person, waiting in the wings, should this relationship collapse. This is
doubly so should the Seven of Swords (clever duplicity wins the game!) or the
charming and seductive Magician appear in the spread.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Everything written about this card above is enhanced in an outcome position. Be
sure to look at other cards in the spread to see which way the wind blows.
FOUR OF PENTACLES
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Miserly behavior. Valuing possessions over experiences or people.
ROMANCE READING
Have you ever dated someone who seemed very charming at first, but rather
quickly devolved into this new and heartbreaking person who is emotionally
stingy, not particularly affectionate, obviously afraid of intimacy, and highly
protective of their space? Someone who, for some reason, stuck around in your
life, assuring your mutual unhappiness until you finally end it in a tearful
tornado of frustration and bewilderment? (whew!)
You have had a Four of Pentacles Experience!
This card is a clear cut representation of the Emotionally Avoidant attachment
style, and people of this orientation can only handle small amounts of intimacy
before a very powerful and fearful need to control the space between you kicks
in, leaving you feeling confused and lonely. These are not bad people, but they
won’t be able to come around easily. You can’t love them “better”.
Watch out for someone who engages in little cruelties in order to upset you and
confirm their unconscious belief that romance is more trouble than it is worth.
Painful stuff.
Look for any of the following cards to confirm this: the Five of Swords (fighting
for funsies!), the Eight of Swords (a prison of your own making, but one from
which you can easily escape), the Two of Swords (emotional
withdrawal/unavailability, rejection of love), and The Hermit (a desire to be
alone and control your environment).
On the other side of the coin, and depending on where this card falls in a spread,
it can mean that you are feeling possessive in a way that is focused more on
“acquiring” the person you want, in an almost objectifying way, rather than truly
caring for them.
The Emperor landing in a spread along with this card is strong affirmation of this
tendency to objectify.
Finally and again, as with most Pentacles, context is so important. This card
might represent a less complex but equally vexing issue, such as who controls
the purse strings in your relationship? Is money a source of friction between
you? Time to talk about it before it festers!
Careful discernment and self-awareness is needed to interpret this card correctly.
Keep an open mind regarding your own behavior!
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
As an outcome card, this does suggest the object of your affection is emotionally
remote, and focused on things other than you. It is maddening to see someone
who was once warm and charming slowly back out the door, figuratively or
literally! If you see it happening, try to let them go. No amount of careful
behavior on your part is going to fix this. It’s really not you.
….unless it is. Again, watch for possessiveness and attempts to control others
purely to calm your own fears.
FIVE OF PENTACLES
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Sadness. Loneliness. Financial instability. Business failure. Feeling left out.
ROMANCE READING
Oh dear!
Here’s the good news, Star Pirate: Tarot speaks in big bold symbols, and the
extreme representations of misery on the cards often only manifest as dainty
poop sandwiches you have to nibble on a bit, and then toss.
Here’s the bad news: There’s a dainty poop sandwich in your future.
Or at least, there might be, if you don’t take things in hand right away. This IS
traditionally a card of breakup. I won’t mince words here. This is a classic card
of being Separated From What You Want Very Much. …BUT…
Sometimes this is just a miserable fight that nearly ends your relationship. You
recover, but it takes a while.
Sometimes it means your partner loses a job and is terrified and miserable, so
please be gentle and try not to fan their freak-out flames with your own fears.
Sometimes it means you are having an extreme emotional reaction to something
that is actually not all that dire. Perspective is needed.
A traditional illustration of this card always shows a ragged, freezing family
outside a beautiful home whose light filled windows show a scene of a table
groaning with abundant food, cheer and warmth, and this might be just how you
feel right now: like everyone is having a great time but you, and you will never,
ever be happy again.
Look for positive cards in the spread to mitigate this. If The World is in the
spread, it means that this pain you feel now is only the ending of a miserable
phase of your life, and you are on to bigger and better things! If the Sun appears,
it means you come upon a revealed truth that makes staying in the relationship
impossible, but thank goodness you know!
If Death appears, well, it’s over. I mean really over. The bandage was ripped off
on the count of “one.” This is doubly so if the Tower appears, and it is entirely
out of your control, and not your fault.
Other Five cards in the spread add to the punch of Pentacles, especially the Five
of Cups. Fives are bummers in Tarot, generally, but the least of them is the
Wands. If the Five of Wands appears with this card, you have a good chance of
fighting your way back to a good place, if you keep a cool head.
If the Big Daddy of “Fives” appears in a spread as well, The Heriophant (Major
Arcana #5), it means that adopting a very reserved, traditional, calm and classy
demeanor will go a long way towards softening the effects of this card.
No matter what happens, how you feel now is not how you will feel forever.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
This is where loss is especially likely. I hope it’s only a tiny bite of that
sandwich.
SIX OF PENTACLES
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Generosity, philanthropy, charity. Taking care of others. Financial success.
Fairness
ROMANCE READING
This is a very straightforward card, and the interpretation of it is either positive
or less than positive depending on which way the wind is blowing with respect
to the other cards in the spread.
Fairness and balance in a relationship are the main themes of this card, so often
and most likely the Six of Pentacles just states that in this relationship both of
you have a strong sense of fairness, balance and generosity. You care that each
other’s needs are well met. Both of you contribute equally to the relationship,
with the knowledge that giving even more than just 50% makes it all work.
The only time this card is unfavorable is when negative cards are present as a
majority in the spread. Then this card suggests a “one down” position for
someone in the relationship, through money, power or control.
If this is a new relationship, be sure that everyone is on a place of equal footing.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Having this card in the outcome position is favorable! This suggests fairness and
material comfort is to be had in this relationship. Even more importantly, you are
both on the same page with regard to your needs, wants and hopes for the future.
Good stuff!
SEVEN OF PENTACLES
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Efforts made will reap rewards. Pausing to reflect.
ROMANCE READING
There is a famous example of psychological bias called The Sunk Costs Fallacy.
This is normally about business, but it can easily apply to relationships as well. It
boils down to this: We often stick with someone despite all signs pointing to a
poor fit. We stay because we have poured effort and energy into this romance,
dating is so dang hard, and leaving now feels like quitting too soon. We have
already invested so much, we think we are so close, but basically we perceive the
relationship has greater value than it objectively does.
Bleh.
In fact, this is such an effective bias that we often throw “good money after bad”
in an effort to salvage past choices. Rarely a good idea!
The Seven of Pentacles is here to help you step back, breathe, and assess. It’s a
pause to refresh, as it were.
In this card a young man is looking rather melancholy, and is leaning on his hoe,
gazing upon a garden rich with pentacle coins. Now is the moment right before
harvest, and things look good.
Why the long face, then? He is deciding if the work was worth the reward.
You might soon be at a tipping point where you decide if this relationship is one
worthy of deeper investment. The cards around it, and of course, your personal
experience, will answer that.
There is nothing wrong at all with pulling back a bit and assessing the value and
possible future of your romance before you sink any more of yourself, your time,
effort and money into it. The opportunity to do that is soon upon you.
Just because you invested time and effort and love into something doesn’t mean
it can give you back what you need. Look carefully at the situation you are in,
and take heart…there is nothing negative about this card, as you will either
realize you are happy and wanting to go forward, or that you need to take your
ball and go home.
For a single person, it’s the moment before you sign up for a dating site, or go to
that party. In this instance I would encourage the investment, as it could pay off
big!
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Decision time! Take some time and look at this relationship. Could be a tipping
point of commitment!
EIGHT OF PENTACLES
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Hard work and dedication. Doing what needs to be done. Small gains over time.
ROMANCE READING
I know what you are thinking. Ho Hum. Not a very romantic card. A man at a
bench, hammering out pentacle stamped shields. Laborious work, and he
currently looks none too prosperous.
Looks can be deceiving!
I think the Eight of Pentacles is one of the most romantic of the Pentacle cards,
and here’s why:
The Eight of Pentacles is a card of loyalty and commitment. This card represents
a person who is going to stay and work hard to make a relationship stable and
happy. He or she is the person who is loyal through the tough times, willing to
go to therapy to learn how to communicate better, and generally shows up like a
grown up. He’s a mensch, and She’s a devoted, kind hearted, emotionally
intelligent soul.
This is not a flighty person. In a world that increasingly values non-committal
“chill” over earnest expressions of intent, desire and devotion -- this is very
romantic indeed!
The only drawback to this card is that it can represent someone who might be
loyal to someone unworthy of this kind of care. Make sure everyone involved is
equally noble of intent!
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Everyone involved intends to stick it out through the hard times. Small gains,
over time, reap romantic rewards and increased bonding and connection. It can
also mean small financial gains and comforts over time that make your life
together easier. This is a sweet little card that should make you smile when it
lands in this position. Just make sure that other negative cards in the spread don’t
point to misplaced loyalty!
NINE OF PENTACLES
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Luxury, comfort, being free of care. Alone in luxury.
ROMANCE READING
A lovely card on its own, the Nine of Pentacles is about security, luxury and
comfort. Nothing wrong with that at all. This card, though, also tends to mean
that you enjoy this luxury alone.
It could be that your desire for emotional space and comfort and security means
you hold people at arm’s length as a form of self-protection, or that your
romantic interest does this to you.
This is not a card of deep feeling. There could be a shallowness to the company
you share. There is no emotional ugliness to this card, but that is because there is
little in the way of deep emotion present at all.
If this card is in a position that represents the other person in your life, beware of
the seductive delights of nice dating experiences and the traditional trappings of
romance rather than a more genuine and soulful connection. It might surprise
you that all these grand gestures don’t mean much to the person dazzling you
with adventure.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Alor...style over substance! It will be fun for a while, and you might enjoy some
nice little adventures together, but don’t expect high romance. It’s just not likely
to be found here.
Or -- maybe that is just what you need right now?
TEN OF PENTACLES
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Wealth. Inheritance. Material comfort.
ROMANCE READING
There is a lot to be said for material comfort. Takes a great deal of stress away
from day-to-day life, and that can be wonderful. Studies suggest most fights
between couples are money stress related. Evidence of deeply secure comfort is
depicted in the Ten of Pentacles, and it does suggest that becoming part of a
wealthy family, or receiving an inheritance, could be in your future.
What this card does not promise, though, is emotional happiness. It’s not a
negative card at all, but one of the central meanings of this card is “luxury and
comfort can sometimes mean boredom rather than happiness.” While it is hard to
imagine this being true as you struggle to pay the bills, there are plenty of
famous people in the world who can confirm the fact that all the material
comfort one can imagine does not assure happiness.
Now, having said that…all this goes out the window in a spread that has one or
more of these: Ace of Cups, Two of Cups, Lovers, or the Emperor and Empress
together in a spread…then, whoa! Fairy tale stuff, either on a grand scale, or a
smaller, sweeter and more manageable scale, is possible here.
Very Happily Ever After. Good Luck!
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
The same meaning as an outcome card as stated above! Look for romance cards
to be included in the spread to assume emotional happiness. Watch out for
negative cards that suggest a comfortable but cold partnership.
PAGE OF PENTACLES
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Thoughtful young person. Well off. Intelligent and practical. Careful focus and
discernment.
ROMANCE READING
The young person depicted in the Page of Pentacles is as smart and practical as
they come. All the Pages have their defining romantic characteristics: Wands are
emotional passion, Cups are love, Swords intellectual connection…and the
Pentacles are about sex! Surprising, I know, but by sex I don’t mean the
sweeping, loving, passionate kind found in the other suits. I mean the “sex is fun,
so let’s do it” sort of casual encounter that can be fun, but lacking in deeper
connection.
Also, watch out. This Page is smart but less emotionally invested than most, and
can easily walk away from situations others might cling to.
This is not a bad person (unless other cards around him confirm that idea). This
is just a person who enjoys things on a simple, material level, rather than a
soulful or heartfelt one.
OUTCOME
A wait and see outcome. Pages are “New Relationships”…new romances. So
now is the time to observe and enjoy, rather than decide or attempt to control.
He might be a nice, handsome, practical guy you enjoy as a friend with benefits.
Or, you might wonder why this guy seems like such a catch on paper, but is such
a false start in person. Observe!
KNIGHT OF PENTACLES
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Calm person. Well off man. Devoted Man. Earthy person. Constancy.
ROMANCE READING
Ahh.
This is where we meet the first of the three most gracious, committed in love,
generous and warmly open “people” in Tarot.
In a traditional Tarot deck, the Knight of Pentacles is the only knight that isn’t
galloping, running, bucking or otherwise being ADVENTURE BOY.
He is instead fancily dressed in dark dress armor, sitting calmly on a large, black,
gorgeous horse that is well groomed and standing still. Grapes and vines are a
motif for the Pentacles and are all around him, symbolizing wine, pleasure, and
wealth.
If you are looking for a passionate, committed, ardent, and most of all
STEADFAST partner in love, you really can’t go wrong here. If there is a
downside to this knight, it may be that people who need constant variety and
excitement might find him a little dull. These are also people who find actual
intimacy a daunting thing to be avoided. Let them go off and have their doomed
romances. This Knight is here to stay, and will say so.
Bonus: he is a thoughtful and attentive lover.
Good times.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
SCORE! Fist pump. What a catch! Your mother will be terribly pleased! Even as
a circumstance this card stands for calm, tranquil, secure abundance. Nice!
QUEEN OF PENTACLES
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Gracious, generous host. Beautiful home and thoughtful care. A kind and loving
woman.
ROMANCE READING
The Queen of Pentacles is the epitome of someone who in the past might have
been referred to as a Very Classy Broad.
And she is. The man who has her in his life is a lucky, lucky man. She is warm
and kind and sensual and creates beautiful homes and is emotionally and
materially generous to a fault. She is a nurturer and a giver and a cook and a
homemaker supreme (when not possibly running her own law firm!).
Our Queen of Pentacles doesn’t do well with poverty, though. She will be
gracious and kind even in struggle but, seriously, she needs her comforts. Like
the Empress, a starving artist’s life is not for her. Having said that, of course,
when she visits starving artists she brings homemade lasagna and wine and good
cheer.
All the good qualities she possesses stand as a definition of this card, even when
there is no “person” connected to it. See it abstractly then, as a circumstance.
Look for kindness and comfort. This is an island of calm in a turbulent world.
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Same as above, only more so!
For a man’s reading, it is entirely possible you have found THE ONE FOR
YOU, of either gender.
KING OF PENTACLES
TRADITIONAL MEANING
Wealthy, earthy, practical man. Generous.
ROMANTIC READING
Everyone has his or her type, and everyone has his or her needs, but the King of
Pentacles is, in many ways, as close as one gets to someone with a fairly
universal appeal, simply because he is very kind, calm, prosperous, generous,
warm, and very good hearted.
Is he an intellectual? He’s not stupid by a long shot, but he lacks the moody
intellectualism of the King of Swords. He’s street smart and good at business.
He’s smart with money.
Is he funny and fun? He isn’t the Golden God the King of Wands represents, but
he is the man you want to hug and flirt with gently. He knows interesting things
and has old school skills.
Is he a great lover? He isn’t a virtuoso lover poet like the King of Cups, but he is
tender and thoughtful and cares about your pleasure.
He is in all things and all ways a Good Catch, for sure. Devoted, reliable,
steadfast, and honest.
You could do worse.
I mean, you could do WAY worse, than this big handsome sweetie.
In his least interesting aspects, he might be a bit dull and lacking in spontaneity,
or maybe lacking the creative or intellectual curiosity you might think you need
to be utterly fulfilled. Maybe. I tend to want to say here that you should never
rely on one person to be all things for you, and this is a good guy. Hang out with
friends for that variety, but come home to comfort and love.
This is definitely NOT “settling.”
POSSIBLE OUTCOME
Oh yum. Take this opportunity and enjoy yourself. He’s the marrying kind.
SOME USEFUL SPREADS
There are many richly detailed books about nothing but Tarot spreads, and that's
extremely interesting and loads of fun and I suggest that when you become more
expert, these new spreads can be a great tool to use to expand your capabilities.
Still, I find that you need to “trust” your spread for it to accurately tell you what
you want to know. By this I mean it's become a good friend; you know each
placement by heart, it feels natural to you, and you have used them over time.
This is why I use only a few different spreads in my own readings. Classics, as it
were, though modified over time.
There are many fancy spreads out there, and if you find one during your travels
that resonates with you strongly, USE IT! There is a reason it resonates for you,
and you should run with that. But, if you are new to Tarot, try a few classics first,
and get to know them well, and you can learn much.
Here are the spreads I use most often, and a sample reading will follow to show
the cards in action!
For all readings, I prepare the cards by having the querent shuffle the deck in
ANY way that works for them: traditional card shuffle, smear them into a big
pile and then gather them up again, drop them from a really high place and …ok,
no. Not that.
Mix them up until they feel “done” in any way you like. You will know when
this happens if you keep a calm and focused mind. Don’t chat about your day
while shuffling; be in the moment, and mix up the cards completely. Then, cut
the deck once, re-stack, and draw from the top of the cut.
While doing this, think the following:
“What do I most need to know about ___________?” … filling that blank spot
with the subject of interest.
“What do I most need to know about ______'s feelings for me?”
“What do I most need to know about my current relationship's potential?”
“What do I most need to know about that weird behavior ______ engaged in last
Saturday?
Keep it simple, keep your mind open, and Tarot will give you more information
than you might receive had you thought something very layered...or very
specific.
Tarot can often give you very sophisticated answers to very simple questions.
Consider handing over the reins and seeing what happens!
ISSUE-ACTION-OUTCOME
This is rich with information, in spite of being only three cards, so let's unpack
this first and fundamentally useful spread carefully.
The Issue: Two of Swords. Stalemate. Impasse. Rejection of love offered,
emotional withdrawal. The Love Avoidant attachment style. Good times here.
Could mean you dig Spock, but usually it means something once embraced is
currently being rejected. Painful.
Action: Hanged Man
As we know from reading the definitions of the cards, the Hanged Man is a
strong admonition to take your hands OFF a situation, and realize the less you
do, the better the result. Things are happening to you and around you, and yes, it
feels like you're twisting in the wind, but this is a case where it is a fertile time of
withholding in order to be able to express yourself later.
This card strongly says "Do nothing. Back off. You have no control here."
Outcome: Temperance
Peace. Balance. Calm, and contentment. Not a card of boredom. A card of
healing. Especially good if querent is in a state of ill health or stress currently, as
it suggests freedom and healing.
So there is a rather obvious interpretation here, and that is that her new man is
definitely withdrawing, she most definitely feels helpless, and it is painful.
Doing anything, chasing after him, anything at all, will make it worse. It ALSO
suggests that if she refrains from doing this, the result is that he will return, and
calm will reign.
Sounds nice on the surface, and it is, for a while, but let's look deeper.
I would expand on this. People tend to assume that they can engage in a behavior
indefinitely. That they can just "Be more quiet", or, "ask for nothing", or
somehow hold themselves to a different standard of behavior in order to create a
persona that will be pleasing to another...forever.
You can't. You simply cannot do this. Eventually the resentment will reach a
fever pitch and you will explode. With an emotionally avoidant or unavailable
person, making yourself smaller and smaller in order to not seem needy isn't
going to work long term.
A lot of reasonable needs are chalked up to neediness in a world that values
detached "chill" more than earnest and sincere desire. You get to have needs.
Being discerning as to what is a reasonable need and what is true "neediness" is
a muscle you can build up easily, but it takes self-compassion, and a realization
that you are deserving of excellent treatment from the people in your life.
So my friend could ask for less. Need less from this cool person. And as a result,
she will get to keep him for a while. But at what cost?
He is near her, they might get naked together regularly, but her needs for deeper
connection remain unfulfilled.
When reading Tarot, looking deeper can show you how issues of fit are
fundamental here. These are two people with different basic needs. They both
can change behavior but the needs are still there and will not change. Stalemate
might be achieved, and it IS possible that if she asks for next to nothing this
skittish unicorn of a man might actually calm down and let her pet him and make
him hers; it DOES happen...but you are rarely the exception to the rule; it's why
they are called exceptions.
BUT...
Here's an important caveat: Am I reading a lot into a little spread? POSSIBLY.
I’m doing this because this is the easiest and most useful go-to spread around,
and I want to show you how much you can get from so little.
Still…
Sometimes a spread like this means simply that the man in question is having a
bad week, and if you back off, all will be well. That is why it is important to look
at the whole spectrum of outcomes, and then gently hold both in your minds eye.
On one hand, it could just be a bad week, on the other hand, this guy could be an
emotionally unavailable six month time-suck that you would be better off
dumping as soon as you know for sure that this is going to be a permanent state.
So WHAT TO DO? Well, you have been given advice. Do little, back off, and
observe, in this instance. There are plenty of cards that will tell you to DO
SOMETHING, but not in this case. Now is the time to pay attention. So, no
action for a while. Set a timetable. A week, let's say. The situation will provide
you with answers if you pay attention. Does he come back warm and open and
apologetic? Good sign. Let's give it another week!
Does he come back, but is still emotionally reticent, and maybe holding you to a
new "reality" where he gets to be less available but you are still expected to be
lover and confidant? Hm. Ok. Want another week to confirm it? You know best.
Trust your gut, and then act with the love you feel for yourself, which I hope is
abundant, Star Pirate. Don't snack on crumbs and call it toast.
There is a happy ending here. The reading let my friend know to pull back, and
so she did, and over the course of a month realized that she was dealing with a
man who would always run hot and cold. As a result, she stopped twisting
herself to fit his needs at the moment, and took care of herself first. The
relationship died a quick and natural death, with little pain to her, and left her
open to meet the real sweetheart who was open, wanted the same thing in a
relationship as she did, and was delighted to express his feelings towards her
consistently and openly.
Cards 5 and 6, both about the near future, and so I read them as a pair,
each equally influencing the other.
Respectively, we have the Eight of Cups, and The Star.
Aw. Bittersweet. Our querent is feeling a strong desire to walk away from
something he has been heavily invested in for years, and he has a lot of hopes
and fantasies about what that freedom might look like. Still, so much tenderness
between these two. This is most likely a split, but it will not be acrimonious.
There is too much love and care here, and neither wants to hurt the other.
Card 7: The Fool. Faith in the Universe to provide. This card suggests that both
of the people involved want something to change so badly that they are willing
to let go without a plan of
"what's next?". The spread suggests that when they do separate, the positive
changes they make in their individual lives will cause a vacuum that will fill up
with lovely New People and Experiences. The Fool suggests the Universe is
positively itching to get started with this, actually, and that the change is long
overdue.
Card 8: How other people influence you: The Four of Swords. Now this is
interesting, as in a romance spread this card suggests retreat...solitude, and rest.
And this makes sense here, if you think about it.
When you are contemplating ending a relationship, you might have a lot of Big
Ideas About Your Fabulous New Life that is just about to start...but in truth, for
most of us, there needs to be a period of rest and alone time, to recharge, or heal,
and contemplate what you need in a relationship, as it will shift with time and
experience.
I'm not of the belief this is needed EVERY time, by the way. Nor do I think
every "too soon" new relationship is a rebound, or that you need to wait a set
amount of time before you dive back in the pool.
Sometimes, Mr. or Ms. Wonderface just shows up when they show up, least
expected and marvelous, and you get to roll with the beautiful surprise of it all.
For most of us mere mortals, though, there will be a few months of Thai takeout
and Netflix, and that is ok. It can be wonderful, in fact. So, ultimately, for
position 8, and in this case, how "other people influence you" , they are doing so
by simply Not Being There. It's you and you for a bit, Star Pirate, and this means
you can binge watch whatever you want and don't have to share the green curry.
So there.
Card 9: The Hermit. I suppose whenever a relationship ends, and, in spite of
the fantasy of being inundated with romantic options as soon as you are out the
door, even the most appealing of us can hold a fear that this was their last
chance, and that they soon will slip into endless loneliness.
My client's fear was that he would become not the desirable bachelor with a
redhead on each arm, but the reclusive, lonely guy playing a whole lot of video
games, guiltily enjoying himself but no longer engaged in the world, eating a
few too many Hot Pockets, and certainly not getting naked with anyone.
BUT, this is a card in a position about fear, not reality, and I double down on this
statement given the outcome card, which is:
10: The Sun
You very, very definitely want the Sun as an outcome card, in any circumstance,
period.
The Sun is a glorious outcome card, and in this case very apt. The outcome of
ending this relationship...friendly, warm, loving and nurtured as it was, was to
shine the light of truth regarding the dissatisfaction with the lack of romance and
passion in this otherwise loving couple.
The Outcome card takes all the cards that came before it and combines itself
with them to let him know that while it won't be an instantly exciting, James
Bond like transition to being single again, it will be the right choice. The choice
that will lead him to the future happiness projected by the Sun. There is romance
in his future, and the Sun is the promise of that. So get some rest, recharge, and
get ready to rumble.
So there you have it: a very short history, all the Tarot love interpretations you
can eat, and a few useful Tarot spreads to get you into lots of trouble.
I wish you a long and fruitful exploration of these fascinating, endlessly variant
and surprisingly subtle cards. They can calm your mind, give you hope, help you
think, and sometimes actually tell the future.
I hope you come to love them as much as I do.
Want more? Ok well, thanks! I'm writing another book this very second! How
exciting!
You can also get a Tarot reading from me, if you are feeling terribly brave. I am
actually very nice, I promise.
If you are interested in having a reading done by me, I offer readings through an
Etsy storefront, which you can find here:
http://www.enlightenedtarot.etsy.com
I also make lovely and unusual Tarot themed jewelry and accessories you can
find here:
http://www.persephonesbijoux.etsy.com
Want to just say hello? Say hi to me on Instagram!
@PersephonesBijoux
Here's wishing you love, Star Pirate.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
Thank you to my wonderful mumma, Pat Stilwell, for her help and unconditional
encouragement. She is probably the real reason you are reading this.
Thank you to beautiful and thoughtful Debbie Tune for her help and unfailing
support.
Thank you to my friends and clients who helped me be a better reader,
encouraged me to write the book, and pestered me lovingly to finish it.
I also very much want to thank again my beautiful Eric, who reminds me daily
what it is to be loved truly and well. You are my Sun and Star.