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Poetry
What life is really like
- Discusses themes like facing mortality, illness + hope of
recovery in poems
- Deals w relationship w father
- He= university professor + knows world isn’t kind place
 Poet: - He urges her to toughen up
- Wants to teach her about life + expose her to real-life
experiences
- At end of poem- becomes reflective + silent when exposed to
her suffering
- Written in blank verse/ free rhyme
- Use of Enjambment- speeds up poem to emphasise idea of
breathlessness- there is little time to stop + many lessons to be
learnt
- Stanza 6= stand alone line:
 Format: - emphasises contrast between father who has always urged
her to toughen up to help her through recovery from breast
cancer + mastectomy

- Implies many people have wrong idea about life

- Isn’t fun- can catch you off guard if you are not prepared
 Title: - Father wants to expose her to experiences of suffering, pain +
death so that she will be prepared for these inevitable realities
to make her stronger ensuring she has best chance of survival
Themes:
Cruelty:
• Father believes that life is hard/ cruel
• He attempts to make her tough by cruelty- exposing her to harshness of life:
1. He wants her to see how chicken’s heads are chopped off
2. He forces her to hold badly injured pigeons while he stitches them up.

Fate:
• Belief= whatever will be, will be
• Prepares daughter for negative event from young age
• She must realise that life= harsh
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• When she undergoes surgery- he= shocked + realises she has toughened up
• He= there to help her heal
• Fate= bird of prey that spies on her + causes her to flinch in anticipation of harsh event
which will eventually happen

Resilience:
• Father tries to create opportunities for his daughter to face harsh realities of life, so
that she can become resilient + recover quickly from setbacks
• She grows up ‘waiting + waiting’ for ‘years + years’ for cruel event to hit her

Family Relationships:
• Relationship between father + daughter
• In beginning- harsh figure of authority who is impatient w naïve daughter
• He= abrupt + rough as gives instructions
• Speaker doesn’t want to disappoint her father + meekly listens
• He expects her to confront harsh realities so that she can toughen up
• When life hits hard in form of cancer- he= there to take gently care of her
• He= loving + caring despite of cruel efforts to toughen her up

Illness:
• Speaker has to confront frightening illness- breast cancer + mastectomy thereafter
• She has toughened up- life has dealt her cruel hand- father is there to help heal

Facing mortality:
• Being diagnosed= shock + frightening
• Would be regarded as death sentence
• Speaker has been expecting biting pain for so long
• Arrives in form of diagnosis
• Life changes forever
• Toughens up instantly as undergoes surgery
• Positive outcome- father is there to help during recovery
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Hope of recovery:
• Determination has given her strength to toughen up without self-pity/ crying
• Wil face illness head-on
• Father will help
• Has prepared her for this moment

Tone:
→ Caution + anger
- speaker needs to toughen up to be able to survive in cruel, harsh world
→ Conversational as enjambments together with colloquial words
→ Lack of punctuation- contributes to father’s direct words becoming part of her
when they are printed in italics rather than inverted commas
- she relives his anger + impatience when the ‘really’= bold
→ Line 35= gentleness
→ She has gone through cancer diagnosis + mastectomy
→ Stanza 7- acceptance + resignation
→ Father realises daughter has experienced enough of his life’s harshness- she has
toughened up
→ Life has thrown his daughter a curve ball + he is there now to help her heal

Analysis
1. You need to toughen up - Tone: seriousness + caution- expect life to be tough
- Diction: italics/ no inverted commas- implies words= part of her
memory
- Lack of punctuation emphasises loaded emotion of determination
- ‘toughen up’- become hardened to the way of world
- less emotional to pain + suffering
2. my father would complain -

3. when I was small -

- L2 + 3:
- Experiences his advice as complaint because she is innocent

4. I ought to take you to see - “ought”- implies it is necessary- but could be good thing
- implies he never takes her to witness death of chickens
- Strong advice- suggests father= determined that his younger
daughter must toughen up to face world
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- Alliteration: harsh, angry sound emulates voice of father

- Paradoxical behaviour- cruel to be kind→ under gruffness= gentle
love for daughter: she must survive
5. chickens having their -
heads

6. chopped off. -

- L5 + 6:
- Alliteration: emphasises harsh, cruel real-life situations

7. That’d teach you - “teach”- child needs to be exposed to real-life experiences

Implies learning- he wants her to learn life’s lessons

8. What life is really like. - “really”= bold: emphasising message that she needs to learn various
lessons to face the world head on
- Irony: normally little girls are told fairy tales + they are protected
from death, but she needs to be ready to face life
- Enjambment- speeds up pace of the poem to create feeling of
breathlessness→ little time to stop; so many lessons to be learnt

9. He’d seek me out - Father forces her to assist while stitching up an injured pigeon

10. when one of his pigeons - “his”- pigeons belong to him + takes care of them
- He= angry when stitching them up- shows concern for them (state
of mind)
- Would be traumatic for little girl
- father= harsh + angry- anger directed towards hunters + hawks
- she feels intensity of his anger as if he were angry w her
11. – crazed for his home or - Hyphen= Parenthesis→ pigeons are in bad state physically; injured
- also afraid of death

12. mad with terror from a -

- L11-12:
- Personification: comparing pigeon to crazy person
- Speaker successfully emphasises how unsettled pigeon is
- Just as pigeon= attacked + experiences trauma- life can ‘attack’ person at random
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13. roaming hawk - - roaming- moving about aimlessly over wide area
- another cruel, real-life situation is described
- “hawk”- Antithesis: bird of prey has full control- has nothing to fear
Pigeon= scared + exhausted as it comes back to place of safety +
refuge
14. would tumble into - “tumble”- rush headlong in uncontrolled way filled with fear

15. the loft - “loft”= pigeon coop

16. mutilated by - “mutilated”= disfiguring injury caused by beak of hawk/ wire trap of
hunter
- Paradox: l9→ father= healer who cares about small creatures
- exposes his little girl to badly injured birds which must really be
traumatic
WHY?
- being cruel to be kind- wants to ensure that when harsh realities
hit, she will be able to survive
17. wire or beak - Synecdoche: part= mentioned (wire/ beak)
- whole is implied (trap/ hawk)

18. I was the one made to - “I”= BOLD- emphasises harsh cruelty she was exposed to
- Tone: indignance/ annoyance
- She must be upset + angry that she had to help him
19. clench my palms round - “clench”= strong verb- at beginning of line emphasises how anxious
+ terrified she must have been while rigidly fixing her little hands
around the bird’s chest
- She had to hold on tightly so that the bird could be stitched
- Contrast between action + intention→ she had to be gentle at the
same time not to inflict more harm
20. its pumping chest, - “pumping chest”= Metaphor for hearts:
1. Of pigeon- trauma of injury- alive, but scared
2 Of speaker- trauma witnessing a terrible injury
21. to keep it still while -

22. my father’s hairy fingers - Alliteration: he has performed this task many times- he can do it
stitched well
- “Hairy”=Diction- creates impression that father was imposing figure-
has authority= university professor
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- She- watching intently- notices hairs on fingers

- traumatic experience had great impact on her
- she remembers smallest details
23. its garotted throat - “garotted”= strong verb to indicate damage done to bird’s throat=
severe injury
- killed by strangulation using wire/ cord
24. angrily to rights again. - “rights”- he=fair + wants justice to prevail
- “angrily”- father angry at humans who set traps
- has strong sense of justice- life should be more fair
Mission= to heal injured things

25. You see life is a fight for - Theme: we must be able to continue living in spite of ordeals
survival - Italics: direct words- part of her make-up→ she grew up with this
idea
26. he'd shout, forgetting - “shout”- not really angry- passionate about justice for all + setting
world straight
- Father= figure of authority= larger than life; used to shouting
instructions to students
27. he was not lecturing his - forgets he’s talking to his young daughter in same way he addresses
students students at university as if giving lecture

28. or giving his inaugural -

address

29. You gotta roll with the - Diction-Slang→ he= human + we no longer see him as harsh + cruel
punches. - Tone: cautionary- warning seems less threatening as university
professor uses slang= unexpected
- Allusion: boxing terminology- when boxer leans away from
opponent’s punch to lessen impact of blow
- Emphasises that we must learn to adapt to difficult
circumstances→ trying to prepare daughter to adjust + absorb
punches that life throws→ Theme

30. i waited and waited for - Tone: thoughtfulness

the bitter - “i”= Diction- lower case→ little girl- emphasises vulnerability +
insecurity
- Enjambment- emphasises that tough times are part of our lives
- Repetition: emphasises expectation that some day she will receive
blow from universe
- slows down pace of poem- earlier there was anger + commands
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were given
- now- calm resignation- passing of time- waiting for calamity to
strike
31. roughness to spy me and - “bitter roughness”= Metaphor: poet=pigeon + cruel hawk=
circle calamities of life
- Harshness of life seems to be watching + circling like hawk- waiting
for right moment to attack
32. in to land -

33. years and years - Repetition: reinforces idea of waiting for unexpected, harsh blow to
fall

34. of flinching anticipation - Metaphor: expectation of something bad which is going to happen
until - Oxymoron: 2 opposing words joined in moment of time-
expectation/ finality→ she is already reacting to blow she is still
waiting to receive
35. the day i came home from - “the day”- Metaphor: her moment of pain arrives in form of cancer
hospital. + her life changes drastically. Her operation has been done- she
comes home
- just as home was safe haven for pigeons- so will be for her
- she will be safe here + able to heal
- “i"- Antithesis: not little girl anymore- vulnerable + in pains

36. and my father dressed my - Stand alone line→ emphasises contrast between father:
wound Antithesis: father has always urged her to toughen up + now he has
to toughen up to help her through her recovery from breast cancer
+ mastectomy
- Father’s behaviour then + now
- “Dressed my wound”= Metaphor + Euphemism: for mastectomy- He
was there for pigeons + now he is there for her

37. Easing with practiced - “easing”= Diction- slow + gentle word

hands - Tone changes from caution to one of resignation:
- father realises that she has experienced her share of toughness
- he takes care of her in slow, methodical way
- Word implies being gentle (character)
- He wants to set world right for her as he had for pigeons (state of
mind/ theme)
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38. the drip from my - “bulldozed chest”= Metaphor: surgery= violent as wire of trap/ beak
bulldozed chest of hawk that ruined pigeon’s chest- she has had mastectomy

39. he renewed the plaster in - Antithesis/ Oxymoron/ Personification: to previous behaviour:

breathing silence - in beginning= outspoken, loud + harsh
- angry, shouting man
-NOW= quiet + gentle
- speaker can hear him breathing in silence as teds to her vicious
wound
40. never speaking never - Repetition: emphasises fact that father doesn’t speak at all
- This is not time for lecturing/ shouting
- NOW= time for healing physically + emotionally- they both have to
show how tough they are
41. once saying -

- L40-41:
- Lack of punctuation→ read more slowly, trying to figure out when we should pause
- reflects the father’s patient, slow way of nursing her back to health

42. Life’s a bastard - Metaphor: life’s changes can be cruel- cancer + invasive surgery= life
changing experiences

43. Toughen Up. - Capital letters: emphasises her determination to fight illness + to
heal

- L42-43:
- Contrast/ Antithesis:
Then- she would’ve heard words over + over again
Now- hear father’s words in her voice- she can fight this battle because her father has prepared her
for something like this her whole life long
- Enjambment- lines are isolated from stanza 7
- He doesn’t repeat these words because she has received her share of ‘toughening up’