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 Table of Contents 1 3

Table of Contents

Translator's Foreword 6

Author's Foreword 8

Tale of the Lost Princess 11

New Beginnings 19

What are Thoughts of Repentance? ........................................... 19

A Huge Benefit ........................................................................... 20
Emuna 23

Precious, Loved, and Delightful................................................. 26

Everything is For the Best.......................................................... 26
There is Nothing other than Him ............................................... 27
Proper Persona} Prayer 29

Correct Personal Prayer.............................................................. 29

To Do Your Will ......................................................................... 30
lmproper Persona! Prayer........................................................... 33
What Do You Really Want? ....................................................... 33
Bitul, or Nullification of Ego ..................................................... 34
Every Moment in Hitbodedut..................................................... 35
Self-Composure.......................................................................... 36
Believing in Ourselves ............................................................... 37
And he Refused ... ...................................................................... 39
Clarifying the Truth in its Entirety ............................................ 39
To Leam in Ortler to Do............................................................. 40
Guard and Remember ................................................................ 41
What is Transgression and Repeat? ............................................ 42
Don't Go Away ........................................................................... 43
The Ten Journeys of the Shechinah (Divine Presence).............. 44
The Inner Wisdom of Prayer ...................................................... 44
There's No Punishment in the World at Ail................................ 45
4 1 The Garden of Yearning

There's No Sadness in the World at Ali...................................... 46

We Remembered the Fish... and the Squash... ......................... 47
To Want what HashemWants..................................................... 49
A Father's Mercy 51

Mitigating the Wrath and Revealing the Concealment.. ............ 52

The Most Beautiful Revelation.................................................. 53
1 Cried Out from the Depths....................................................... 54
For Hashem's Sake..................................................................... 55
Until l Become a Kosher Person................................................ 56
A Path to the Side 59

Every Moming is New............................................................... 60

The Point ofTruth within theTruth........................................... 61
The Point ofTruth at ail Costs................................................... 62
There is No Concealment 69

The World is Full of His Glory .................................................. 70

Emuna without Doubts............................................................... 71
The Eyes 75
The Eye Sees and the Heart Covets........................................... 75
The First Choice......................................................................... 76
The Internai Dimension of Guarding One's Eyes ...................... 77
What are You Looking For? ....................................................... 78
A MonumentalTzaddik - and Guardian of the Eyes................. 79
Deep Sleep 81

Facial Illumination..................................................................... 83
There's No Sadness in the World 85

Lifelong Work............................................................................ 85
The Joy of Recognition.............................................................. 86
 Table of Contents 1 5

Don't Worry about Tomorrow .................................................... 89

Living the Moment..................................................................... 90
Today Moshiach Will Come ....................................................... 91
Don 't Be a Drunk 95

Light Drugs ................................................................................ 95

Alien Fire ................................................................................... 96
No to Tobacco ............................................................................ 96
Fr om Above ................................................................................ 99
The Sifting Process .................................................................. 100
I Feil, but I Got Up ................................................................... 101
Tremendous Reinforcement ..................................................... 102
To Be a "Kosher" Person .......................................................... 103
The Mountain of Gold 107

The Trnly Rich Man ................................................................. 108

A Placein the World to Come ...................................................111
FearNoOnebutHashem ......................................................... 112
Retired (hassidim .................................................................... 112
Tenacity .................................................................................... 113
One Obstacle after Another

Confession ................................................................................ 123

Thoughts of Repentance ........................................................... 124
Glossary 126
6 The Garden of Yearning
1

Translator's Foreword
Rabbi Shalom Arush's first English-translated book, The Garden
ofEmuna, made its debut less than a year ago. It's hard to imagine
any other contemporary work that has had such a monumental
impact the world over, from Australia to Alaska and all points in
between, in such a short time. His golden message has opened
up new gateways of hope and happiness to tens of thousands of
people. As one reader wrote me, "My life is divided into two parts
- before l read The Garden of Emuna and after I read The Garden
ofEmuna." Anything more is superfluous.
Rabbi Shalom's words are a cool drink to a parched soul. He - like
our teacher and master Rebbe Nachman of Breslov of blessed and
saintly memory - is a master physician of the soul who adeptly
cures all people's ills with one secret spiritual remedy- emuna, the
pure and complete faith in The Almighty.
With Hashem's loving grace, l've had the privilege of maintaining
a close relationship with Rabbi Shalom Arush for over a decade
already, both as the dean of the Ashdod branch of his renowned
rabbinical seminary, "Chut Shel Chessed" and as his English
translator and understudy. More than anyone l've ever seen,
Rabbi Shalom meticulously practices what he preaches. He is the
undisputed pillar of emuna in this generation.
The problem with The Garden of Emuna is that it left readers
yearning for more. A reader from Washington State wrote, "Now
what do I do? l've finished your amazing book and I need more.
I can't pack up and move to Jerusalem to enroll in your Yeshiva,
so please don't leave me hanging. I need more guidance and more
emuna!"
Rabbi Shalom is not one to rest on his laurels. He works day and
night, learning, teaching, lecturing, writing, and spreading emuna
wherever he goes. Sometimes, days go by without his head meeting
a pillow. Before I had the opportunity to discuss with him the need
of a sequel to The Garden ofEmuna, the original Hebrew B 'gan
HaGa'aguim was already half written.
 Forewords 1 7

B'gan HaGa'aguim, known in English as The Garden of

Yearning, is an amazing interpretation of Rebbe Nachman's tale,
"The Lost Princess." Rabbi Shalom penetrates the inner dimension
ofthis poignant allegory to extract Rebbe Nachman's instructional
allusions to emuna and to the proper way ofserving Hashem, thus
attaining true fulfillment in life. This book is not for the spiritual
novice, but for the individual that yearns for and seeks a stronger
connection with Hashem. This book is most beneficial after one
reads The Garden of Emuna carefully, from cover to cover.
With Hashem's loving guidance, I have tried my utmost to preserve
the flavor and intent of Rabbi Shalom's original style. I have
taken no license in translating Rebbe Nachman's holy words in
the "Tale of the Lost Princess," not even for the sake of accepted
English grammar and syntax, since Rav Shalom Arush's inspiring
interpretations are based on these precise words. Even so, any
deficiency in this book is surely that ofthe translator and not ofthe
author. My sincere thanks and blessings go to Rachel Tzipporah
Salkover and to Rivka Levy for their dedicated assistance in editing
and proofreading.
I wish to express my deepest gratitude to Rabbi Shalom Arush
himself, who so selflessly has illuminated my mind and soul with
his noble teachings. May Hashem bless him, his family, and his
pupils with the very best of spiritual and material abundance
always.
My cherished wife Yehudit deserves the credit for this book and
for everything else I do. May Hashem bless ber with long and
happy days, success, and joy from all her offspring. May they walk
courageously in the path of Torah and emuna until the end oftime,
amen.
With a song ofthanks to the Almighty and a prayer for the full and
speedy redemption ofour people Israel,
Rabbi Lazer Brody, Ashdod, Elul 5767
8 The Garden of Yearning
1

Author's Foreword
Dear Reader,
Awesome secrets are concealed within the tales of our holy Rebbe
Nachman of Breslov, of which we have no concept; his allusions
are numerous and deeper than the sea. One can attempt to interpret
them according to one's own level of comprehension.
This book results from my traditional Shabbat talk following
moming services, when we study of Rebbe Nachman's Tales, as
is the custom in all Breslover communities. My nuances from these
talks glow in the light of the Shabbat and in the light of the holy
tzaddik and his disciples, whose words are intertwined in every
page.
We've attempted to arrange this book in a reader-friendly manner.
Rebbe Nachman's original words appear in easily recognizable
form, and for the readers' benefit, we've placed the original tale at
the beginning of the book and a glossary in the back of the book.
Those who are familiar with the content of "The Lost Princess" can
derive from it a wealth of wisdom when seeing the amazing way
that awesome messages of emuna and spiritual reinforcement are
hinted in Rebbe Nachman's words. From one standpoint, the tale
is utter simplicity; on the other hand, it's a kaleidoscopic tool that's
beneficial to al! people on all rungs of the spiritual ladder.
How shall I thank Hashem for all His loving-kindness? If my mouth
was as full of praise as the waters of the ocean, I couldn't thank
Hashem for even one of the hundreds of thousands of millions of
miracles and wonders that He has done for me, enabling me to
delight in the sweet allusions that our holy Rebbe Nachman has left
by way of these wonderful tales: They illuminate the world with
simple faith while strengthening the path of teshuva, joy, and love.
My first blessings go out to my teacher and spiritual guide, Rabbi
Eliezer Berland shlit'a; may it be Hashem's will that he enjoy long
and fruitful days leading us, and may he continue on his wonderful
way of raising pupils and pupils of pupils, while blessed with
 Forewords t 9

strength of body and with illumination from above.

My heartfelt thanks to my mother and teacher, Yamna bat Esther,
may Hashem grant her length of days. May she derive limitless
gratification from all of her children and offspring, and may she live
to see the illumination of Moshiach's countenance, may he corne
soon.
A special thanks to my dedicated wife, a blessed woman of valor,
Miriam Varda, may Hashem grant her length of days. She is my
friend, partner, help, and source of everything good. All my success
and everything I have are in her merit and belong to her. May we
continue together to see the success of our offspring and of all of our
pupils, and the full redemption oflsrael speedily and in our days.
My faithful friend and pupil, Rabbi Eliezer Raphael (Lazer) Brody,
may Hashem guard over him, translator of this book and author
of "Pi HaBe'er", "Nafshi Tidom", and "The Trail to Tranquility",
has tirelessly dedicated himself to spreading my teachings. His
translation and adaptation of The Garden of Emuna and of my
CD lessons have already spread in the tens of thousands to every
continent on the globe. May Hashem grant him strength, success,
and joy from his offspring. and may we continue together to spread
emuna in the \Yorld until the age of 120.
Last but not least are my dear pupils Rabbi Yaakov Hertzberg and his
wife Esther, may Hashem bless them, who have merited from above
in assisting me with the composition of my books. May Hashem
bless them with long and happy days, and may they see success
from their children and the light of emuna - which they help spread
- illuminate the world and their path in life.
May it be Your will, Father in Heaven, that all oflsrael walks in the
path of teshuva, love, and truth, and may Your glorious kingdom be
revealed on earth speedily, amen.
Rabbi Shalom Arush, Jerusalem, Elul 5767
10 1 The Garden of Yearning

Approbations
The following are excerpts from the approbations that this
generation's !eading rabbinical figures wrote for the original
Hebrew version of The Garden ofYearning:

Rabbi Ovadia Yossef, Rishon Letzion and President of the

Counsel of Torah Sages:
"The Garden of Yearning is the work of an artist, the Prince of
Torah, the brilliant and pious Rabbi Shalom Arush, may he merit
long and happy days, who has assembled in his purity a golden
treasure of wonderful spiritual arousal... "
Grand Rabbi Naftali Moscowitz, the Melitzer Rebbe:
"The Divine Presence glistens from the pages of The Garden of
Yearning, which is full of spiritual amusai and practical advice
for the strengthening of emuna in everyday life, all derived
from reliable sources that walk in the path of holiness... Every
persan will derive benefit from this book, for there is no limit to
the obligation to leam and releam about emuna until it becomes
intemalized in the heart... "
Rabbi Eliezer Ber/and, Rosh Yeshiva of Shuvu Banim Breslov,
Jerusalem:
"I read breathtakingly the holy and fabulous book The Garden of
Yearning that will open the eyes of any persan no matter where
he is...the fountains of wisdom and understanding will open to
whoever leams this book with eamest... anyone who contributes
gold from his pocket to spread this book will merit seeing Moshiach
and the rebuilding of our Holy Temple, amen!"
141 The Garden of Yearning

day, you lost. Nevertheless, it is very difficult

not to eat, especially on the last day, when
the Evil Inclination is very overpowering. (In
other words, the princess told him that now she
would make the conditions more lenient, that
from now he would not be expected to fast, for
that is a very hard condition to fulfill, etc.) So
now, choose a place again, and dwell there also
a year, as before. And on the last day you will
be allowed to eat. Only you must not sleep, and
must not drink wine, so you won't fall asleep.
For the essential thing is not to sleep." So he
went and did accordingly.

On the last day, he would go there, and saw a

spring flowing, with a reddish hue and a wine­
scented fragrance. He asked the servant, "Did
you see that spring, which should have water in
it, but its color is red, and its scent is of wine?"
And he [the viceroy - LB] went and sipped
from the spring. And he immediately fell into
a sleep that lasted several years - seventy, to be
exact. And great numbers of soldiers passed
by with their accompanying gear. The servant
hid himself from the soldiers. Afterwards came
a covered carriage, and in it sat the princess.
She stopped next to him [the viceroy - LB}.
She descended and sat by him, recognizing
who he was. She shook him strongly, but he
failed to wake up. And she started to bemoan,
"How many immense efforts and travails he
has undergone, these many years, in order to
free me, and because of one day that he could
have freed me, and lost it...," and she cried a
great deal about this, saying "There is great
pity for him and for me, that I am here so
very long, and cannot leave." After that, she
 Tale of the Lost Princess 115

took her scarf off of her head, and wrote upon

it with her tears, and laid it by him. And she
rose and boarded her carriage, and rode away.
Afterwards, he [the viceroy - LB] awoke, and
asked the servant, "Where am I in the world?"
So he [the servant - LB] told him the whole story
- that many soldiers had passed there, and that
there had been a carriage, and a woman who
wept over him and cried out that there is great
pity on him and on her. In the midst of this,
he [the viceroy - LB] looked around and saw
that there was a scarf lying next to him. So he
asked, "Where did this corne from?" The servant
explained that she had written upon it with her
tears. So he took it and held it up against the
sun, and began to see the letters, and he read
all that was written there - all her mourning
and crying as previously mentioned, and that
she is no longer in the said castle, and that he
should look for a mountain of gold and a castle
of pearls, "There you shall find me!"

So he left the servant behind, and went to look

for her alone. And he went for several years
searching, and he composed himself, thinking
that certainly a mountain of gold and a castle
of pearls would not be found in a settled area,
for he was an expert in the map of the world. So
he went to the deserts. And he searched for her
there many years.

Afterwards, he saw a giant man, far beyond the

normal human proportions. He was carrying
a massive tree, the size of which is not found
in settled areas. The man asked him, "Who are
you?" He answered, "1 am a man." The giant
was amazed, and exclaimed, "I have been in the
161 The Garden of Yearning

desert such a long time, and I have never seen

a man here." So he [the viceroy - LB] told him
the whole story, and that he was searching for
a mountain of gold and a castle of pearls. The
giant answered him, "Certainly, it does not exist
at ail." And he [the giant - LB] discouraged him
and said that they had muddled his mind with
nonsense, for it surely does not exist. So he (the
viceroy) started to cry bitterly, for he felt certain
that it must exist somewhere. And this giant
discouraged him, saying that certainly he had
been told nonsense. Yet he (the viceroy) still
said that it must exist.

So the giant said to him, "I think it is nonsense.

But since you persist, I am in charge of the
animais. I will do this for you: I will call them
ail. For they traverse the whole world, perhaps
one of them will know where the mountain
and the castle are." And he called them ail,
from the smallest to the largest, ail the varieties
of animais, and asked them. And all of them
answered that they had not seen these things.
So he said, "You see that they told you nonsense.
If you want my advice, turn back, because you
certainly will not find it, for it does not exist."
And he [the viceroy - LB] pleaded passionately
with him, saying, "But it absolutely must exist!"
So the giant said to him, "Behold, in this desert
also lives my brother, and he is in charge of the
birds. Perhaps they know, since they fly at great
heights - perhaps they saw this mountain and
castle. Go to him and tell him that I sent you to
him."

So he [the viceroy - LB] searched for him [the

giant's brother - LB] for several years. And
 Tale of the Lost Princess 1 17

again he found a very large man, as before.

He was also carrying a massive tree, as before.
And this giant also asked him as had the first.
And he [the viceroy - LB] told him the whole
story, and that his brother had sent him to him.
This giant also discouraged him, saying that it
certainly did not exist. And he pleaded with
him as with the first. Then the giant said to him,
"Behold, I am in charge of the birds; I will call
them, perhaps they know." So he called all the
birds, and asked them all, from the smallest to
the largest, and they answered that they did not
know anything about this mountain and castle.
So the giant said to him, "You see, it certainly
does not exist. If you want my advice, turn back,
for it simply does not exist." But he pleaded
with him, saying "lt certainly exists!"

The second giant said to him, "Further ahead

in the desert lives my brother, who is in charge
of the winds, and they run around the whole
world. Perhaps they know." So he went several
more years searching, and found also this giant,
who was also carrying a giant tree. And the
giant asked him, as the others had. And he told
him the whole story, as before. And the giant
discouraged him, as before. And he pleaded
with him as well. So the third giant said to him,
that for his sake he would call all the winds and
ask them. He called them, and all the winds
came, and he asked them all, and not one of
them knew about the mountain and the castle.
So the giant said to him, "You see, they told you
nonsense." And the viceroy began to cry bitterly,
and said, "I know that it certainly exists!"
18 1 The Garden of Yearning

As they were speaking, one more wind came.

And the giant in charge of them was annoyed
with him, saying, "Why did you not corne with
the rest?" He answered, "I was delayed, for I
needed to carry a princess to a mountain of gold
and a castle of pearls." And the viceroy was
overjoyed. The one in charge asked the wind,
"What is expensive there? (In other words, what
things are considered valuable and important
there?)" He [the wind - LB] answered him,
"Everything there is extremely expensive."
So the one in charge of the winds said to the
viceroy, "Seeing that you have been searching
for her such a long time, and you went through
many difficulties. Perhaps now you will be
hindered by expenses. Therefore I am giving
you this vessel. Every time you reach into it, you
will receive money from it." And he [the third
giant - LB] commanded the aforementioned
wind to take him [the viceroy - LB] there. The
storm wind came, and carried him there, and
brought him to the gate. There were guards
posted there, that would not let him enter the
city. So he reached into the vessel, took out
money and bribed them, and entered the city.
And it was a beautiful city.

He approached a man, and rented lodgings, for

he would need to stay there some time. For it
would need much cunning and wisdom to free
her. And how he freed her, he [Rebbe Nachman
- LB]did not tell, but in the end he freed her.
 New Beginnings 1 19

Chapter One

New Beginnings

i:'.'.[ e answered and said: Along the way, I

��,told a tale, that everyone who heard it had
thoughts of repentance. And here it is ...

Before our holy Rebbe began telling this tale, he revealed that it
would be capable of stimulating thoughts of repentance in anyone
that heard it.

What are Thoughts of Repentance?

A thought of repentance is one's pondering in his or her heart that,
"Even though l'm the most evil person in the universe, from this
moment on, I want to change my ways and walk in the straight path
according to Hashem's will."
The Gemcra says - and Jewish religions law stipulates - that
as soon as a person has a thought of repentance, he or she
is deemed a perfect tzaddik! Even though a person has not yet
actively perfom1ed a single mitzvah, and the only change in his
or her life bas been an invisible inner desire - Hashem gazes deep
into that person's heart and mind and clearly secs their desire to
change for the better. From that moment on, Hashem regards that
person as a pious individual.
As long as we maintain the desire for repentance, or teshuva,
Hashem continues to regard us as righteous individuals, even
though we're still far from realizing our goals. Indeed, even if
we're not yet working to improve our character - and we're still
full of bad habits and bodily lusts with no idea whatsoever about
the Hashem's ways and basic religious law - despite all this, if
we cultivate an unequivocal desire is to improve ourselves, then
Hashem considers regards us as complete tzaddikim. In any event,
20 1 The Garden of Yearning

the road to spiritual improvement should be measured, graduai,

and in accordance with proper instruction.
The above concept is a wonderful source of advice and
encouragement for ail of us. Even when we fall or fail, we can
strengthen ourselves with a renewed resolve that from this moment
on, we desire to walk in the path of righteousness. We must be
courageous that no matter what, we'll never abandon our desire
to be better and remain steadfast in our yeaming to get close to
Hashem and to do His will. As long as we ding to our aspirations
ofenhanced proximity to Hashem, Hashem continues to regard us
as complete tzaddikim. As such, we benefit from Divine assistance
in eve1ything we do. Hashem's blessing and assistance enable us to
succeed in all ofour endeavors.

A Huge Benefit
When we never give up our desire and yeaming to be better, we
benefit in the following ways:
1.We literally work wonders with our prayers. Since Hashem and
the Heavenly Court consider us tzaddikim, our prayers are always
accepted.
2. Rebbe Nachman of Breslov says that desire is the main thing.
Therefore, when we cultivate our desire to serve Hashem, we
are doing what we're supposed to do. As such, we are assured of
receiving a tikkun, or soul correction, in all ofour actions, because
our sages promise that Hashem will help us in the path we choose
for ourselves.
3. When we leam the value of desire, we realize that a mere thought
of teshuva, such as, "I want to do what Hashem wants me to do"
is enough to alter a person's status from evil to righteous. This
knowledge prevents us from becoming discouraged ifwe slip and
fall, for all we have to do is to renew our resolve to serve Hashem
with ail our hearts, and we're back on our feet again!
Even ifwe fall or fail over and over again - and it's clear that we
won't change ovemight - we should never abandon our desires.
 New Beginnings 1 21

As long as the flame of desire to get closer to Hashem flickers in

our hearts, Hashem continues to regard us as righteous. Hashem
judges us not so much according to where we are, but according to
where we want to go. The desire in our hearts overrules our actions.
Hashem knows that persona! improvement is a long hard road, but
He regards us as tzaddikim the minute we begin our joumey of
yeaming to be better.
4. Rebbe Nachman of Breslov writes (Likutei Moharan, I: 261):
"When a person falls from his spiritual level, the best advice is to
start anew in the service of Hashem, as if he never served Hashem
in his life. For a person must strengthen himself in the service of
Hashem and not to be discouraged by anything in the world, only
declare a new beginning each time." When we know that our desire
to serve Hashem eams us the status of tzaddikim, we can summon
the inner strength to begin anew, even after the most disastrous fall
or failure.
 Emuna 123

ChapterTwo

Emuna

�1 1 here once was a king, who had six sons

""��"and one daughter. This daughter was
very precious to him. He loved her
exceptionally, and took great delight in her ...

Rebbe Nachman tells a tale of a king that had seven children - six
sons and a daughter. A parent naturally loves a child, so the king
most certainly loved his six sons. But, his daughter was special,
so he loved her most of all. The king's daughter alludes to emuna,
the pure and complete faith in Hashem. Rebbe Nachman always
emphasized that the most important thing in our lives is emuna.
Allegorically, even though there are many things that The King
(Hashem) likes, He favors emuna more than anything else.
\Ve should know that emuna is in itself one of Hashem's creations,
as Rebbe Nachman writes (Likutei Moharan I: 173): "The soul
and emuna are one aspect. There is a spiritual world of emuna,
from where the characteristic of emuna is taken, and the world of
emuna itselfhas emuna in Hashem, blessed be He."
Throughout the entire Torah and throughout all of creation, we see
that the number seven is the foundation of all things. Repeatedly,
we see "six plus one" as an allusion to perfection. This is also an
indication of emuna, for the number seven alludes to the perfection
of every detail within creation.
Let's look at a few examples:
According to Kabbala, the world is govemed by the seven lower
spiritual spheres, and the seventh is ma/chut, or monarchy. The
other six spheres all influence ma/chut, on which is dependant the
tikkun of the entire universe. Each sphere has its own characteristic
trait; malchut's characteristic trait is emuna.
241 The Garden of Yearnin g

The world was created in six days, and on the seventh day, Hashem
declared a day ofrest. Our sages learn creation earned its perfection
by virtue of the Sabbath, the day of rest. Therefore, a week is
divided into six days of handiwork, and the seventh day which is
the "Sabbath Queen," the perfection and ultimate purpose of the
entire week. The Sabbath is emuna.
The years are divided into six years where one tills the land, and
the seventh year which is the shmitta, or Sabbatical year, when the
land is allowed to rest. The shmitta year is totally dependent on
emuna - when the farmer believes that Hashem will provide for
him even though he's not growing anything that year. Seven cycles
of seven years lead to an additional yovel, or Jubilee year, which is
also a year that depends on emuna, for the land lies idle during the
Jubilee year as well.
Seven planets govern the constellations, or the signs, of the zodiac.
Emuna perfects the zodiac, as Rebbe Nachman of Breslov writes
(Likutei Moharan 1:31 ): "There is no perfection of the zodiac, other
than emuna."
Seven days of mouming correct the deceased person's blemished
emuna. The seven days that a leper must remain outside the
encampment, the seven days of purification for one that has corne
in contact with a dead body, the seven days of nidda, the impure
part of a woman's ovulation cycle, and the seven days of kiddushin,
or betrothal, are all designed to correct and perfect emuna.
A slave serves his master for six years, and goes free in the seventh,
for this is the correction of the blemished emuna that led to slavery
in the first place.
There are seven openings in a person's face, all of which we
must sanctify: two eyes, two ears, two nostrils, and the mouth;
these correspond to the seven branches of the holy menorah, or
candelabra in the Beit Hamikdash, our holy temple. We call these
the seven candles, and we sanctify these seven candies by way of
emuna.
 Emuna 125

All three Jewish festivals rotate around the theme of seven:

Succoth is seven days; Passover is seven days; and Shavuot, which
is only one day, but has seven days for one to fulfill the obligation
of bringing a ritual sacrifice in the Holy Temple. Jewish esoteric
thought teaches that the perfection of the festivals is by virtue of
emuna.
The Oral Torah is based on seven - the six orders of the Mishna
and the seventh, which is prayer.
The Seven Shepherds of our people - Abraham, Isaac, Jacob,
Moses, Aaron, Joseph, and David - are the essence and root ofour
leaders in every generation, for they are the guardians of emuna as
Rebbe Nachman explains (see Likutei Moharan I: 22).
There are seven parts of the world, seven climatic zones, seven
source metals, seven types ofwisdom, seven core character traits,
and seven types of houses of idolatry. The eye is comprised of
seven main parts. Spiritually, there are seven sounds, seven types
of logical rebuttal, seventy faces of Torah, seventy sacrificial bulls
during Succoth, and seven preparatory days before the inauguration
of the holy Tabernacle, or mishkan. The Torah is full ofmany more
sevens, all indicating the spiritual perfection attained via emuna.
In general, the number seven is ma/chut, or in other words, the
characteristic of emuna. Emuna perfects everything, for we
leam (see Abridged Likutei Moharan, I: 31 ): "The perfection of
everything is emuna, and without emuna, everything is deficient.
The perfection of Torah is only by way of emuna, for the Torah
is based on emuna, since the main thing is emuna." We also leam
there that "Emuna is the source of all blessings, and via emuna,
all blessings are fulfilled." Rebbe Nathan of Breslov also says
(Likutei Halachot, Hilchot Nidda, 2), that emuna is the vessel that
holds the illuminations of all the world's tikkunim, or rectifications.
Therefore, all the abovementioned sevens attain their perfection by
way ofemuna.
26 1 The Garden of Yearning

Precious, Loved, and Delightful

Rebbe Nachman uses three terms to describe the king's affection
for the princess: "This daughter was very precious to him. He
loved her exceptionally, and took great delight in her." These three
terms ail refer to emuna.
Precious - emuna is more precious to Hashem than anything
that the world tends to consider valuable, rare, or important. For
example, people give high regard to a scholar. But, if the scholar
lacks emuna, he !oses his stature, for Rebbe Nathan says specifically
(see Abridged Likutei Moharan, I: 31 ): "A scholar alone (without
emuna), is surely nothing, for one can be a scholar and an evil
person at the same time."
Loved - Hashem loves emuna very much, as Rebbe Nachman
writes (Sefer HaMidot, Emuna): "By virtue of emuna, a person is
as beloved to Hashem as a wife is to her husband."
Delightful- Emuna is the delight ofHashem (See Likutei Moharan,
1:97). Hashem adoms Himself with and delights in the emuna of
the 1;ghteous, and loves to see what they accomplish with their
prayers. Prayer is emuna. People with emuna are delightful to
Hashem; the tzaddikim with steadfast emuna are Hashem's delight
in creation.

Everything is For the Best

Now that we know that emuna is the world's most precious commodity,
and that the entire purpose of Torah, mitzvot, and creation is to bring a
person to emuna, we should know that the main principle of emuna is
our faith that everything is for the best.
Any emuna that lacks the faith that everything is for the best is
incomplete is accompanied by fantasies and disappointment.
Emuna is synonymous with happiness and with prayer. One who
claims to have emuna, but who is unhappy, and who fails to walk
around with a song on his lips and with dancing feet that praise and
thankHashem, is contradicting himself. For one who truly believes
that everything is for the best will always be singing, dancing, and
 Enmna 127

happy. A persan that only daims to have emuna, but who doesn't
pray for all his needs, is again contradicting himself. If he had
complete emuna, especially that Hashem is standing there right
over his shoulder listening to every syllable of his prayers, he'd
certainly pray at length and in great detail for all his needs.
In addition, we should know that the emuna that everything is
for the best indudes and encompasses all the aspects of emuna.
One who believes that everything is for the best certainly believes
in Divine providence, or hashgacha pratit. Everything is for the
best because everything cornes from Hashem as magnificent
individually-tailored Divine providence. If anything in the world
was left to chance, it would be impossible to dedare that everything
is for the best.
When we believe that everything is for the best, we certainly
believe that everything that occurs in our lives has a message, a
reason, and an ultimate purpose whose objective is to stimulate us
to get doser to Hashem.

There is N othing other than Him

In addition, when we believe that everything is for the best, we
believe that there is no power in the world other than Hashem.
One who believes that "there is nothing other than Hashem" never
blames himself or others for anything, since everything cornes from
Hashem. As such, a person is spared from a long list of negative
emotions such as anger, revenge, and frustration.
When we refrain from tormenting ourselves after a setback in
life, we avoid depression, self-flagellation, and feelings of guilt,
bittemess, and low self-esteem. When we don't blame others for
our misfortunes, we don't fall into traps of hate, revenge, anger,
and the like. By dinging to the belief that everything is for the best,
we avoid every emotional difficulty in the world.
For example, with emuna, we avoid jealousy. King Salomon writes
that jealousy causes the decay of one's bones - in other words,
jealousy does serious damage to a persan. Imagine a poor persan
28 1 The Garden of Yearning

who has emuna; he's not jealous of the rich person, for he believes
that Hashem does everything for the best, and if he doesn't have
much money, that's Hashem's will too. As such, he stays emotionally
healthy, and avoids the pitfails of jealousy and envy.
When we believe that everything is for the best, we're not constantly
competing with other people, for we know that Hashem is leading
us down our own special path for our own ultimate benefit - all
according to our individual tikkun and task in life. With this in
mind, we need not look enviously at anyone else, for each ofus is
doing his or her own prescribed mission on earth.
With emuna, we're never sad or disappointed. Even if someone
is mean or unfair to us, we believe that everything cornes from
Hashem and that everything is for the very best. Rather than
focusing on the person who's mistreating us, we focus on Hashem
who is doing everything for our ultimate best.
We can conclude that the emuna that everything is for the best is
the principle type of emuna that we should all pray for, since this
emuna is a package deal of healthy emotions, favorable character,
and salvations for all our problems. Although the road to emuna
is not easy, knowing that this is the right road to take is already a
major achievement. We should also strive to understand the value
of what we're searching for: the entire redemption of our people as
well as our own persona! redemption depends on emuna.
Happy is the person that tenaciously searches for the lost princess
- emuna - for he or she certainly brings untold gratification to
the King, Hashem. Even when we don't see immediate results, we
should be strong of heart. With desire and perseverance, each one
ofus will ultimately find our own lost princess, as Rebbe Nachman
allegorically promised. With a strong will, each of us will attain
complete emuna, which will hasten the spiritual rectification ofthe
entire universe.
 Proper Personal Prayer 1 29

Chapter Three

Proper Personal Prayer

0
0

"Y ne time, he met with her on a certain day...

As we mentioned earlier, emuna itself is one ofHashem's creations.

When the King meets with the princess, He meets with emuna.
When any person meets with Hashem in seclusion - what we call
hitbodedut or personal prayer - he or she connects with Hashem
by way of emuna.

Correct Persona! Prayer

Correct personal prayer is only possible once we approachHashem
with emuna, since this is an expression that we subjugate our own
will to the will ofHashem. Whether or not Hashem answers our
prayers, we're satisfied with Hashem's will. It doesn't matter to us
whether Hashem says yes or no as we see in the following story
(Kochavei Or, 77):
A man named Yisroel from the town of Nemirov begged Rebbe
Nachman of Breslov to allow him to travel to a war zone for the
purpose of making a living. Rebbe Nachman didn't want to agree
under any circumstances, but he didn't want to take away Yisroel's
free choice. Therefore, Rebbe Nachman advised him: "Imagine that
you feel the same way whether you go or not, whether I say yes or
no. Now, say five Psalms, and afterwards, do whatever cornes to
your mind." That's exactly what Yisroel did.
Later, he retumed to Rebbe Nachman and said that "yes" came into
his mind. Rebbe Nachman showed displeasure, for he knew that
Yisroel's heart still leaned to the "yes", and was set on doing what
he wanted to do. His lust for money was carrying him into grave
danger. ..
30 1 The Garden of Yearning

According to the principles of emuna, we must know that only

Hashem knows the designated path of an individual's particular
mission on earth. When we believe this, a yes or no is the same
to us; we're just as happy flying to New York as we are flying to
Los Angeles, to make a living selling bagels or selling bonds, or
to meet John Doe or Joe Crow. How? We know that everything
Hashem is doing for us is for our ultimate best. When the "yes" and
the "no" are the same to us, we gain an insight into what Hashem
really wants from us. Hashem illuminates in our hearts exactly
what we need to do.
The Baal Shem Tov once commented on the passage (Psalms
16:8), "I have set Hashem before me always," and asked, "How
do I know that Hashem is before me always?" And he answered,
"When I live a life of emuna, where everything is equal in my eyes,
whether Hashem says 'yes' or 'no'."

To Do Your Will
In spirituality as well, when a person asks Hashem for whatever he
or she needs to observe the Torah and to do Hashem's will, there is
a prescribed path and pace of growth that only Hashem knows. So,
even when we pray for spirituality, the "yes" and the "no" should
be identical in our eyes. We shouldn't be disappointed when we
don't get what we want. We should just continue praying.
Persona] prayer with true emuna means that a person cornes to
Hashem and nullifies his or her own desires. Emuna is an aspect
of ma/chut, and ma/chut has nothing other than what it receives
from the six higher spheres. It's known in Jewish esoteric thought
that when we nullify our ego, and we make Hashem's will our will,
we attain royal virtues - such as patience - that are the result of
emuna.
The core of proper hitbodedut is when a person searches for what
Hashem wants from him or her. Here's an example: "Hashem, I
have no idea what my true spiritual status is, or the proper path l
need to take, or what to emphasize in my life, how I should pray,
or even what I should pray for. But You know everything - where
 Proper Persona! Prayer 1 31

I am in the world, what I should be doing, and how I should do it.

Therefore, please have mercy on me, and give me the words that I
need to speak to You today. Enable me to thank You for everything
I need to thank You for, to evaluate myself properly, and to pray for
whatever I need to pray for. llluminate my heart with proper words
of prayer. .." and.so forth.
Even when we know what we want to pray for, for example, if
we've set aside a portion of our daily personal prayer to pray for
improvement in a certain area, we should preface our prayer with
the type of prayer in the previous paragraph, so that Hashem will
direct us in the right path, give us the proper words, and enable us
to pray at length.
With the type of hitbodedut that results from nullifying our own
will, we never lose hope or patience. Indeed, when we walk the
pleasant path of personal prayer with patience, Hashem opens our
eyes and our mouths, so we can speak to Him properly. With proper
persona! prayer, Hashem most certainly sends us the proper things
we need to say for our ultimate benefit and for the rectification of
our souls, and we succeed in being the way Hashem wants us to
be.
 Improper Personal Prayer 33 1

Chapter Four

Improper Personal Prayer

�, nd he lost his temper at her, and an

�,"utterance escaped his mouth: "May the
no-good-one take you!" In the evening she
went to her room, and in the morning, no one
knew where she was. Her father became very
distraught, and he went everywhere looking
for her.

Improper personal prayer angers the King. Improper personal

prayer means that a person has lost emuna, in other words, his or her
emuna has disappeared. This explains why Rebbe Nachman wrote
(Sefer Hamidot, Anger): "Anger results from improper persona!
prayer," for Hashem's anger manifests itself within a person, and as
soon as emuna disappears, a person becomes impatient and angry.

What Do You Really Want?

lmproper personal prayer means that a person isn't searching for
Hashem's will in his or her hitbodedut, but praying for his or her
own desires and appetites, whether material or spiritual. That's not
what Hashem wants; in effect, improper personal prayer is asking
Hashem for help in doing the opposite of Hashem's will.
Proper persona! prayer means that one nullifies one's own
persona! will in favor of Hasbem's will, and tbat bis or ber
entire hitbodedut revolves around this point- to nullify personal
desires.
Improper persona! prayer means that a person wants Hasbem
to nullify His will in favor of bis or ber own personal desires,
and bis or ber entire hitbodedut revolves around tbis point -
tbat Hasbem sbould do tbat person's will.
Hashem doesn't like material requests for things that are needless in
34 The Garden of Yearning
1

the service of Hashem. Spiritual requests are trickier: Sometimes,

we fool ourselves into thinking that we're asking for spirituality,
but our motives aren't always pure. We may think that we're asking
for Torah scholarship, but deep down we want prestige, publicity,
fame, and honor. We might want people to be kissing our hands,
or whispering behind our back, "What a scholar! What a tzaddik!
Look how holy he acts! He's the pillar of the universe... "
Even those of us that don't care about fame or prestige, but are
serving Hashem in order to eam a lofty place in the world-to­
come, are stilling missing the mark. Rebbe Nachman says (Likutei
Moharan II:37), that just as some pursue their appetites in this
world, others pursue their appetites in the next world. The latter is
of course preferable, but still not the pure service of Hashem.
We can conclude that even in spirituality, we must nullify our
desires in favor of Hashem's will, even when we're asking for
spirituality. Many people fail to understand that their desires -
even in spirituality - are none other than appetites and lusts, even
though they're on a higher level than physical appetites and lusts.
Spirituality seekers realize that bodily urges are nonsense, but they
often make the mistake of substituting spiritual appetites such as
wisdom, honor, rewards in the next world for bodily urges.
Let this be your guideline: The sign of improper persona! prayer,
when one asks Hashem to fulfill his or her desires, even spiritual
desires that seem to be Hashem's will, is when a person feels angry
afte1ward. When our desire is simply to serve Hashem, we never
have sorrow or impatience if our prayers aren't answered, for we
understand that Hashem wants us to continue to pray.

Bitul, or Nullification of Ego

When one engages in persona! prayer without the objective of
nullifying his or her own will in favor of Hashem's will, there is
no way to achieve true proximity to Hashem. Such a person sees
Hashem as a tool for fulfilling his or her own selfish desires - even
spiritual ones. Needless to say, such hitbodedut irritates Hashem.
 Improper Personal Prayer t 35

Rebbe Nachman teaches us the meaning of proper persona! prayer

(see Likutei Moharan I:52), when he teaches us that the main
objective of hitbodedut is to reach a state of bitul, or nullification
of ego, which enables a persan to become one with Hashem. Any
other intent in personal prayer other than bitul detracts from proper
personal prayer.
Pursuing self-interests, without searching for what Hashem wants
from us, is a sign of incomplete or blemished emuna. Blemished
emuna amuses difficulties in life, stem judgments, and anger.
How does a persan become ensnared in anger and impatience during
persona! prayer? The reason is simple � he or she is pursuing self­
interests while ignoring what Hashem wants. These self-interests
are so strong that a persan could even be shaking a fist skyward
when his or her demands aren't fulfilled. Needless to say, such
anger and impatience are apostasy and a critical blow to emuna.
Hashem decides how and when to answer prayers; any opposition
to Hashem's will is therefore detrimental. So, when a persan argues
with Hashem, yells at Hashem (Heaven forbid!) and so forth, he or
she falls into the trap of anger and severe judgments.

Every Moment in Hitbodedut

Know full well that hitbodedut should precede everything we do.
Here's why: personal prayer enables us to collect our thoughts,
to objectively evaluate ourselves, to compose ourselves, and to
understand what Hashem wants us to do this very instant. As such,
we can determine what the truth is, differentiate between right and
wrong, decide what action to take and evaluate everything we do.
We ask Hashem to guide us, to show us the right path, and to help
us pursue it.
When we're undergoing a trying situation, and we compose
ourselves in the proper manner, asking what Hashem wants from
us and requesting His assistance, then we never transgress because
our personal prayer has been proper. But, whenever someone
makes an improper assessment, fails to ask what Hashem wants
and doesn't pray to do Hashem's will, he or she transgresses and
36 1 The Garden of Yearning

goes against Hashem's will. This is a result of improper persona!

prayer that arouses Hashem's displeasure.

<if�n the morning, no one knew where she

�'"'<'was ...

As we mentioned earlier, the immediate outcome ofHashem's anger

is that emuna disappears, and a persan loses his or her connection
withHashem. A concerted effort is subsequently required to restore
emuna.
Eve was the :first persan to make the mistake of improper persona!
prayer. She didn't compose herself to determine what was really
true and therefore failed. She chose ber own will - eating the
forbidden fruit- instead of reminding herself ofHashem's will. The
tragic result kindledHashem's anger and caused a disappearance of
emuna. Ever since, ail of mankind bas had to toi! in order to find
emuna.

Self-Composure
Here we an-ive at one of the definitions of proper persona} prayer
- self composure. Rabbi Levi Yitzchak Binder of blessed memory
- one of the last generation's prominent Breslover Chassidim -
used "self composure" synonymously with hitbodedut. The most
important aspect of self composure - stopping to think before we
do or say something - is to determine the truth, so that it's crystal
clear what Hashem wants from us in evety single matter, thus
dispelling al! doubts. Self composure results in a strong conviction
that never leaves us.
We have to believe in ourselves, namely, that our sincere persona!
prayer is leading us to truth, to the extent that no one or nothing can
make us deviate from what we know is true. Furthennore, even if
we have not yet achieved our objectives, and we know that the road
to fulfilling our goal is long, difficult, and oftentimes challenging
- we nonetheless continue steadfastly in the way that we know
is truth. Knowing that our goal is truth, nothing in the universe
 Improper Personal Prayer 1 37

should be able to weaken our resolve or to lead us astray. With such

convictions, we will eventually succeed in realizing our goals to the
extent that we no longer transgress; this is proper self composure.
As long as a persan harbors the slightest doubt as to what truth
or the proper course of action is, then the Yetzer Hara, or Evil
Inclination, can easily tempt that persan into making tragic
mistakes. The Hebrew numerical equivalent for the word saphek,
or doubt, is 240- which is identical to the numerical equivalent of
Amalek, who signifies the Evil Inclination. Our doubts are our Evil
Inclination, which takes every opportunity to try to trip us, tempt
us to transgress, and to damage our own souls Heaven forbid. By
attempting to weaken us, the Evil Inclination attempts to prevent
us from realizing our goals.
The fault ofnot knowing what is true is not only a fault in our belief
in Hashem or in our belief in the great tzaddikim, it's a fault in
our belief in ourselves. We have to believe in ourselves, namely,
that whatever we leam from the Torah or hear from the tzaddik is
absolute truth and the proper course of action. As such, we never
surrender or compromise our convictions, we fight for the truth,
and we certainly don't subjugate ourselves to anyone that leads us
off that path. We must be strong and persistent to continue in the
path of truth.

Believing in Ourselves
If we look at the Torah from beginning to end, we see that the
failures and setbacks of our ancestors all stemmed from the fact
that they didn't believe in themselves.
First, let's look at Eve, who was commanded not to eat from the Tree
ofKnowledge: When the serpent came to tempt her, he succeeded,
because she didn't believe in herself. She wasn't 100% sure that
what she heard fromAdam her husband was the absolute truth, and
the only truth, and that she must act accordingly.
With regard to Eve's transgression, our sages say: The teacher and
the pupil- to whom do you listen? Hashem said not to eat from the
38 1 The Garden of Yearning

tree - that's the teacher; the serpent said to eat from the tree - that's
the pupil. So, to whom do you listen? Clearly, one should listen to
the teacher; so why did Eve listen to the serpent?
Eve didn't believe in herself, that what she knew was the absolute,
non-negotiable truth. Had she believed in herself, she wouldn't have
been willing to listen to a single word from the serpent's mouth.
She should have said, "This is truth, law, and totally binding!
Mister Serpent, either change the subject, or take a walk! The Tree
of Knowledge is off limits! Case closed!" Eve's failure to clarify
the truth in her own mind was the very opening that allowed the
serpent to lead her astray.
Adam, after hearing directly from the Creator that he may not eat
from the Tree of Knowledge, also lacked belief in himself. Had
the truth been clear in his mind, he would have been forceful and
emphatic: "The fruit of the Tree of Knowledge is forbidden! This
is the absolu te truth that I clearly heard from the voice of Hashem!
This is a non-negotiable fact!" If he had believed in himself, no
power on earth could have swayed him, not even his wife Eve.
Here's another example - King Saul. He erred in that he didn't
destroy the entire Amalekite nation as he was commanded, for he
didn't believe in himself. As such, he let his people tempt him into
sparing the Amalekite's flocks, and he himself refrained from killing
the Amalekite king. Samuel the prophet chastised him (see Samuel
I, chapter 15), and said, "If you consider yourself insignificant,
remember that you are the head of the Tribes oflsrael and Hashem
anointed you as king over Israel!" In other words, Samuel's
reprimand hones in on the fact that Saul didn't believe in himself
and didn't believe in the fact that Hashem had anointed him as king,
and that be should have decided what's proper in Hashem's eyes,
and not the masses. Hashem commanded King Saul to wipe out
the Amalekites and all their possessions, and specifically stipulated
that not a single Amalekite animal be left alive. Had King Saul
believed in himself, could anyone have swayed him?
 Irnproper Persona) Prayer 1 39

And he Refused ...

Let's look at an opposite example, of a tzaddik that had a firm belief
in himself - Joseph. The tmth was crystal clear in Joseph's mind,
so when Potiphar's wife tried to tempt him, the Torah says, "And he
refused." We sing this passage with the note that's called shalshelet,
so when reading the Torah we draw out the word "refused" three
times longer than most of the other notes that we use to chant
the Torah reading. In essence, the Torah is telling us that Joseph
refused, and refused, and refused! He had no doubt - another man's
wife is forbidden! No insistence, goading, or temptation in the
world could make Joseph veer from what he knew was the truth.
He believed in himself: "This is what I learned! This is truth! This
is how I must act!"
We also see at the end ofRebbe Nachman's Tale ofthe Lost Princess,
that the viceroy attained such a strong measure of self composure
that nothing could weaken his resolve. He never doubted what he
believed was the truth, namely, that the princess had been taken to
a mountain of gold and a castle of pearls, and that he must rescue
her from there! Even when superhuman giants tried to convince
him otherwise, and gave him strong evidence that there's no such
thing as a mountain of gold and a castle of pearls, he remained
unflinching in his resolve. As such, be ultimately succeeded in
rescuing the princess.

Clarifying the Truth in its Entirety

This is the goal of hitbodedut, and only this is proper hitbodedut.
In the first stage, we should clarify for ourselves point-by-point
what the truth is according to our holy Torah and how we should
act accordingly. We should know what Hashem wants from us in
general and what the truth is in any particular instance. We must
build a cogent and forceful measure of self composure: Such and
such is the truth, and nothing in the world can make me deviate from
it or give me the slightest shred of doubt. This is the meaning of
believing in ourselves: we believe in every point that we've clarified
for ourselves, and nothing can make us swerve from the truth.
40 1 The Garden of Yearning

In the second stage, once we have clarified a certain point, and the
truth is clear to us, we must now pray daily and ask Hashem to help
us live according to this unequivocal point oftruth, so that no one
or nothing can make us deviate from the truth. We also have to ask
Hashem to prevent our hearts from tempting us to act otherwise.
Even after we've clarified the truth, we still have the long war
against our internai enemy, the Yetzer Hara, or Evil Inclination,
who incites the body against the soul. The Yetzer masterfully and
cunningly incites a person to act in discordance with the tmth, and
makes a person forget the truth that he or she has already clarified.
Avoiding the Yetzer's pitfalls requires daily and incessant prayer.
Rebbe Nachman teaches (Rebbe Nachman's Discourses, 47):
"Therefore, one must overcome and set aside the time required
for composing oneself thoroughly, evaluating al! one's actions in
this world, whether it is befitting to spend one's days doing these
particular actions. When a person doesn't compose himself, he
doesn't know what he's doing, and even if he has an occasional
measure ofselfcomposure, it doesn't last long, and his sense flees
with the passing moments. Even the little sense he has isn't strong
and forceful. For this reason, such people don't understand the folly
ofthis world. But, ifone had strong and forceful composure ofthe
mind, he'd realize that everything is folly and nonsense ... "

To Learn in Ortler to Do
Here's a practical example: A person learns that the Torah commands
us to guard our eyes. This is an unequivocal cornmandment,
anchored in Jewish religious law and elaborated in al! the major
works of ethics and Chassidic thought. Maybe he even heard
lectures that aroused him, teaching that the only way to guard one's
eyes is to close them. He also heard that one cannot attain this level
without continuai daily prayer, asking Hashem to help him fulfill
the commandment ofguarding his eyes.
With all this in mind, how can such a person walk down a city
street with his eyes wide open, gazing in eve1y direction? Simply,
such a person lacks self composure, lacks proper persona! prayer,
 Improper Personal Prayer 1 41

and doesn't believe in himself! He has yet to clarify to himself that

what he has leamed is the absolute truth, and he hasn't prepared
himself for a battle of no compromises - to judge himself every day
on each and every forbidden sight, and to pray for help in guarding
his eyes. Without concerted daily prayer for guarding one's eyes,
it's impossible to avoid looking at forbidden sights.
Proper persona! prayer means standing before Hashem with
lengthy prayer, begging and requesting that we clarify this point of
truth until no trace of doubt remains in our hearts: We must close
our eyes to forbidden sights. There's no situation in the world that
allows a person to look at a woman, other than members of one's
immediate family. There's no mitzvah in the world that allows a
person to look at a woman, other than choosing a wife. And there's
no reason in the world for one to open one's eyes in a place where
there are women.

Guard and Remember

As long as one sees that he continues to slip, he should persevere in
prayer until he succeeds in guarding his eyes and no longer fails.
Once a person has achieved the ability of guarding his eyes, he
needs continued daily prayer to maintain what he bas worked so
bard for. Only incessant daily efforts will assure guarding one's eyes
completely, which means that one will be spared from uncountable
transgressions, sins, and blemishes to his soul. By guarding one's
eyes, one eams the title of a tzaddik, eams emuna, merits an
abundance of income and miraculous Divine providence, gains a
holy insight into Torah, and benefits from many more blessings.
Why !ose all this? A person that doesn't believe in himself that
the obligation of guarding one's eyes is absolute Torah truth won't
fight to keep his eyes shut! If he'd believe in himself, he'd pray for
this every day while clarifying the truth that looking at women is
forbidden. He'd refuse to be tripped up in this area anymore. And
if he did have a slip-up, he wouldn't ignore it. Instead, he would
simply evaluate himself, make teshuva, and continue praying.
42 1 The Garden of Yearning

What is Transgression and Repeat?

Our sages say (tractate Yoma, 86), "Rav Huna said: Since a person
transg:ressed and repeated the transgression, the forbidden deed
becomes permissible in his mind." Something forbidden appears to
be permissible unless we work hard daily to avoid it. As long as we
keep up the fight, pray, evaluate ourselves, and make daily teshuva,
then even a pe:riodic slip-up is part of our growth, and clearly the
transgression doesn't become permissible in our minds. If we
make a mistake, we don't ignore it. On the contrary, we strengthen
ourselves in teshuva and in prayer until we no longer transgress.
On the other hand, if one lacks proper personal prayer, and he hasn't
clarified to himself that looking at women is forbidden, and it's not
yet clear to him that as long as he continues to transgress he must
add more prayer, more teshuva, and more hard work, and he doesn't
work on his daily hitbodedut, then certainly the transgression will
become permissible in his eyes. In other words, he won't feel that
there's anything wrong with looking at women.
This is the t:rue intent of our sages: Since a person transgresses
and repeats the transgression, the forbidden deed becomes
permissible in his mind - this is when there's no teshuva between
each transgression. But, if a person slips up, does teshuva in the
meanwhile, and then slips up again, the next time he transgresses
is not called a repeat, because the act of teshuva erased the former
transgression. This is one of the magnificent virtues of hitbodedut.
Even if a person doesn't succeed in observing what he knows is
t:rue, the important thing is that he knows what's t:rue, fights for it,
and evaluates himself daily. This is an enormous encouragement
for those who pray and work on themselves, yet continue to fall
from time to time. Rather than losing heart, they should regard
thei:r setback as part of their service to Hashem and their spiritual
growth, and not as a failure.
We can apply everything we said about guarding our eyes to any
mitzvah in the Torah, to improving any character trait, or to ridding
ourselves of any bad habit or bodily lust. W henever we take a
certain issue and invest repeated persona! prayer until we clarify
 Improper Personal Prayer 1 43

the crystal-clear truth in our own mind, Hashem certainly helps

us accomplish what we desire to accomplish. This is the path of
righteousness, and of becoming a complete tzaddik.

Don't Go Away
Once Adam sinned, he caused a concealment of emuna; for that
reason, every subsequent generation and every person must wage a
big war to live according to emuna. Before man first sinned, emuna
was crystal clear, and one could easily believe in Hashem. But since
Adam made improper personal prayer, then an utterance escaped
The King's mouth - Hashem - that the "no-good one should take
you," and emuna, the princess, disappeared. Now, each of us has to
work so hard to find emuna.
A person sins because he forgets Hashem, and tums his back on
Hashem. Hashem responds in like manner, and tums His back
on the sinner. Meanwhile, emuna becomes even more elusive.
Each transgression that a persan commits causes a deeper
disappearance of emuna, making the search for emuna even more
difficult. A person's entire task in the world should be to rectify the
disappearance of emuna that he caused with his own actions.
On the other hand, we can take heart by knowing that if a persan
has sinned, and emuna is concealed, yet the person reinforces
himself and strives to search for emuna, then not only will he rectify
everything, but he will bring the world and himself to a higher
level than if he had never sinned at all, as long as his transgression
wasn't deliberate.
This is all the result of Hashem's mercy, for Hashem sees that a
persan doesn't willfully sin, yet his Yetzer overcomes and leads
him astray. As such, Hashem gives us the gift of teshuva, and
even rewards us by helping us tum our infamous past misdeeds
into steppingstones of spiritual growth. Nevertheless, one should
never willfully transgress in order to attain a teshuva-based tikkun
afterwards. Our sages warned, "He who says, 'I shall sin and then
make teshuva,' never has the chance to make teshuva."
44 1 The Garden of Yeaming

The Ten Journeys of the Shechinah (Divine

Presence)
The concept of emuna disappearing because of Hashem's anger is a
recurring theme in the world, on both a general and a specific scale.
In general, each time a generation's sins weigh heavier, emuna
disappears even more. The Gemara in tractate Rosh Hashanah
(page 31 a) describes how the Shechinah left the Roly of Holies
prior to the destruction of our Roly Temple in Jerusalem and says,
"Rav Yehuda bar ldi says in the name of Rebbe Yochanan: The
Shechinah traveled tenjoumeys - from the Ark of the Covenant to
the cherub; from cherub to cherub; from cherub to the doorway;
from the doorway to the courtyard; from the courtyard to the altar;
from the altar to the roof; from the roof to the wall; from the wall
to the city; from the city to the mountain; from the mountain to the
desert; and from the desert, she ascended to sit in her place, for it is
said, 'I shall retum to My place (Hosea, ch. 5)'."
The meaning of this passage is that the more the Children oflsrael
sinned, the more the Divine Presence left them - step by step -
until it disappeared totally and the Holy Temple was subsequently
destroyed.

The Inner Wisdom of Prayer

The ramification of the Shechinah's disappearance is the loss of
emuna, as we see in the Arizal's explanation of the Roly Temple's
deshuction. Are we merely lamenting the destruction of wood and
stones? Certainly not; the principle destruction is the destruction
of emuna. The buming of the Roly Temple signifies the buming of
prayer's inner wisdom, to the extent that man no longer feels the
need to pray for his needs. The Roly Temple is called a "House of
prayer for al! nations," (see Isaiah, ch. 56).
The buming of the Roly Temple and the exile of the Shechinah mean
that man lost the wisdom of emuna. We see this clearly, especially
when a person has a problem or some type of trouble, and he or
she thinks of every trick in the book or of every possible persan
that might offer advice or a solution rather than simply appealing
 Improper Personal Prayer 45 1

to Hashem for help. The prayer that cornes from true emuna has
disappeared in exile because of our sins � this is the tragedy ofthe
Holy Temple's destruction. Why? The emuna that leads to true and
eamest prayer is the only true advice that one can depend on in any
situation. Without it, a persan is alone and helpless.
On an individual level, each time Hashem becomes angry, He hides
Himselffrom a persan. When Hashem hides His countenance from
someone, emuna doesn't illuminate that person's soul and he or she
finds praying difficult. Hashem is in effect saying: "Your life could
be so pleasant with Me and you could have easily connected to Me.
But because of your current unfortunate actions, your tikkun will
be even more difficult, for you'll have to search for Me within the
concealment that you caused. Now that you've sinned, you have to
work much harder to find emuna." In reality, the only difficulty in
the world is when emuna conceals itselffrom a persan and darkness
subsequently overcomes that person's soul.
From all this, one can now understand what happens when a persan
transgresses. The dark cloud of concealment that overcomes a
persan is the root ofall troubles. The worst sins are those connected
to lewdness, especially in light ofRebbe Nachman's teachings (see
Likutei Moharan I:31) that the preservation of emuna depends
on "guarding the covenant", simply speaking, personal holiness.
Hashem conceals Himself from those who commit forbidden
sexual acts, resulting in the transgressors' loss of emuna. Lost
emuna is extremely difficult to restore.
We can now understand that the entire purpose ofTorah and mitzvot
are to find and restore our lost emuna. Moreover, if a persan fails
to leam Torah with the intent of attaining emuna and getting to
know Hashem, then the Torah and mitzvot won't bring him closer
to Hashem at all.

There's No Punishment in the World at Ali

Ever since the time of Adam and Eve, whenever one sins, the
darkness of concealment becomes stronger. Each blemish causes
additional concealment of Hashem's illumination - emuna. The
46 1 The Garden of Yearning

more Hashem is concealed, the harder it is to find emuna. Hashem

says explicitly in the chastisements of Parshat Ki Tavo (see
Devarim, ch. 31 ), "1 shall hide My countenance on the day because
of the evil." Rebbe Nachman alludes to this in our tale at hand,
for each time the viceroy doesn't do what he's supposed to, then
the princess goes further away, requiring much more effort to find
her.
In reality, there is no punishment in the world; the blemish of a
misdeed is itself the punishment. King David writes (Psalms
34:22), "the death blow of the wicked is evil." Obviously, drinking
poison is dangerous; the subsequent poisoning is not a punishment
but an outcome. Therefore, the fool who drinks poison has no one
to blame but himself. Likewise, one who sins forfeits Hashem's
illumination suffers from concealment. The concealment is not a
vindictive punishment from Hashem, but the result of the sinners
own misdeed. Therefore, there's no room for the sinner to complain
to Hashem about his misfortunes, for they are the outcome of his
own actions.
The way to rectify the downward spiral of sin and concealment
is to declare a new beginning, which means one should compose
oneself and strive for proper personal prayer that seeks to answer
the question, "What does Hashem want from me, now that I have
sinned?" Imagine a dialog with Hashem like this: "Shall I fall into
depression and despair? Of course, not! That's certainly not what
You want from me, Hashem! I know, I should strengthen myself
from this moment on to believe in You, that You are everywhere,
and from this very moment, l'11 do my best to find You and to get
close to You. I want to be a better person, Hashem!" If a person
speaks to Hashem in this way, his or ber spiritual nosedive will
become a jet-propelled takeoff and failure will become success.

There's No Sadness in the World at All

The s01rnw and misfortune that a person has in life is the result of
concealment. Why? If a persan wouldn't sin, he or she wouldn't
lose Hashem's illumination and suffer the subsequent concealment
 Improper Personal Prayer 47 1

which manifests itselfas darkness in their souls. Where there's no

concealment, there's no sorrow and misfortune. As long as one
retains the light of emuna - which as we explained is Hashem's
illumination of the soul and the opposite of concealment and
darkness - one doesn't feel any sorrow or deficiency. Rebbe
Nachman teaches (Likutei Moharan 1:250), that a person feels
sorrow as a result ofdeficient spiritual awareness, namely, that he
or she lacks the emuna that everything in the world cornes from
Hashem and that everything is for the very best.
Describing the hardship of Israel as slaves in Egypt, the Torah
says (Shemot 6:9), "But they did not listen to Moses because of
impatience and hard work." Rebbe Nachman interprets "impatience"
as a deficiency of emuna, to teach that the main suffering of the
Israelites as slaves was their deficiency of emuna. Conversely,
Rebbe Nachman cites "patience" as indicative ofemuna ( see Likutei
Moharan I:155). We therefore leam a pattern of cause-and-effect
in the suffering of Israel in Egypt, as the deficiency of emuna, or
"impatience," led to "hard work" - a life oftoil and trouble.
The Israelites as slaves in Egypt didn't believe in Divine providence.
This was their sorrow that led them to complain and to fall into
depression. They were so deeply despaired that not even the
message ofredemption brought them joy, for they didn't believe in
it. When a person falls from emuna, his or her thought process and
powers of reason are sorely constricted. Such a persan isn't even
able to absorb a good word or good tidings.

We Remembered the Fish ... and the Squash ...

Harsh extemal conditions were not the bitter factor in the Israelites'
suffering in Egypt. Let's examine for a moment the notion of
hard work; is this alone a reason for despair? Many people work
extremely hard from sunup until sundown, and yet they're neither
sad nor depressed. Ifthe Children oflsrael would have had complete
emuna, that Hashem wanted them to toil as construction laborers
for their ultimate benefit - bath individual and collective - they'd
have toiled willingly with no sorrow. One's torture and bittemess
48 1 The Garden of Yearning

in life is certainly the outcome of a lack of emuna - failing to

recognize that everything is the result of Hashem's precise Divine
providence and all for the best. Without emuna, one cannot fully
cope with a difficult situation.
The Torah provides additional evidence that Israel's suffering was
not the result of slavery and forced labor: After Israel was freed
from bondage, they didn't work at ail. They ate the manna - the
bread from Heaven - and were at leisure ail day long to leam Torah
and to get close to Hashem. Yet they still complained, and even
expressed longing for Egypt! "The people became complainers...
'We remember the fish that we ate in Egypt... the squash and
the watermelon..."' (Bamidbar 11: 1-6). What happened all of a
sudden? Amnesia? Did they forget about the back-breaking work
in the hot sun?
From this passage we leam that the lack of emuna embittered Israel
much more than slavery and bard work. As long as the Children of
Israel lacked emuna, even after their redemption from bondage,
they remained embittered. No matter what Hashem and Moses did
for them, they complained. Even when Hashem was about to give
them the most precious land on earth - the Land of Israel - they
complained. What did they complain about? They were suspicious
of a land that is capable of flowing with milk and honey, or whose
fruit are oversized and too sweet. "Hey, something's wrong here ...,"
they said to each other. Without emuna, a person complains about
everything, including the best gifts in life.
As such, there is no reality of "bad"; one's outlook on a scale
from good to bad depends on the level of one's emuna. The
more the emuna, the happier and the more optimistic a person is.
Unfortunately, the opposite is also true. Without emuna, life seems
bad and pessimistic. Emu.na - or the lack of it - determines a person's
mood and state of mind much more than extemal influences and
circumstances.
The practical expression of emuna is when we're satisfied with our
lot in life. lt doesn't matter where we are or what we're doing. When
we believe that our present circumstance is the fruit of Hashem's
 Improper Personal Prayer 1 49

infinite Divine and personal providence and all for the best, we're
happy in whatever we're doing, despite the hardships. Without
emuna, a person isn't happy even in a grand mansion with lush
gardens, servants, swimming pool, tennis courts, two Lamborghinis
and an unlimited bank account. Many are the rich and famous who
lived (and still live!) lives of deep depression.

To Want what Hashem Wants

This explanation can also serve as an explanation for the entire
Torah, namely, that transgression results from a lack of emuna.
Every sin led to a free-fall into the darkness of concealment that
necessitates even more effort in finding the lost emuna. This is a
template for people's setbacks and failures since the beginning of
time.
Therefore, if you feel that you're in a state of darkness, and emuna
seems to be light years away, don't !ose heart! Just like the viceroy,
as soon we renew the search for emuna - and never give up -
this in itself rectifies the blemish of our misdeeds that caused the
disappearance of emuna. Hashem wants us to strive for emuna,
and we should want what Hashem wants. When we do, each of us
will succeed in finding his or her own individual princess while
correcting ail the blemishes of our past, and everything will fall
into place. With emuna, there's always a happy ending.
 A Father's Mercy 1 51

Chapter Five

A Father's Mercy

cJtr er father became very distraught, and he

-�_went everywhere looking for her

Even though Hashem sees that He has no choice but to conceal His
Divine light from a person, He is extremely sorry, for the prophet
says (Isaiah 63:9), "In their troubles, He is troubled." "Their
troubles" alludes to the concealment of Divine illumination, for as
we leamed in the previous chapter, this is the source of ail trouble.
But, as long as a person remains steadfast and clings to emuna
- which in and of itself is Hashem's illumination - then he or she
is not in trouble even in the most trying situation. With emuna, not
only do we spare ourselves loads of trouble and sorrow, but we
also spare our merciful Father in Heaven the sorrow He feels for a
person m sorrow.
Hashem wants to lavish His magnificent illumination on each of
us, as a loving father desires to give to his beloved child. Yet, our
misdeeds cause concealment. When a person falls into the darkness
of concealment, Hashem is deeply sorry and prays for that person.
The Gemara in tractate Berachot, page 7a, teaches us that Hashem
Himself prays, for Hashem says: '"! shall bring them to My holy
mountain and I shall gladden them in My house of prayer' - My
house of prayer not their house of prayer, to teach that Hashem
prays. And what does Hashem pray? Mar Zutra bar Tuvia says in
the name of Rav: May it be My will that My mercy overcomes My
wrath, and may mercy permeate all of My traits, and may I act with
My children with the measure ofmercy, and may ljudge them with
lenience."
"1 shall gladden them in My house ofprayer," is also alluding to the
fact that Hashem gives each ofus a persona! redemption, making us
happy by bringing us to emuna and to prayer, Because redemption
and happiness are the result of emuna. As such, "I shall gladden
521 The Garden of Yearning

them," by bringing them happiness and illuminating their souls by

bringing them to "My house of prayer" - teaching them emuna and
prayer. Dear reader, this is happening to you this very minute, for
this book in your hands is a clear sign that Hashem is bringing you
to emuna. What could be more gratifying to know?

Mitigating the Wrath and Revealing the

Concealment
Let's analyze Hashem's prayer to Himself, as mentioned in the
passage above: "May it be My will that My mercy overcomes My
wrath ..." is none other than Hashem's prayer that the concealment
of His Divine Countenance be revealed, for His wrath in itself is
concealment. This concept is easily understood with the following
example: Imagine that your friend is upset with you. You know that
now is not the time to ask favors from him or her, for clearly, he or
she doesn't want to hear from you at ail. You sense the ill-feeling,
and you don't even consider the idea of requesting anything at this
time from your friend. By the same token, when Hashem is angry
at someone, that person is virtually unable to pray.
At this point, any of us would be shocked: "This is scary! What
do I do if Hashem is angry at me, and I open my mouth to pray
and nothing cornes out? How can I live for a day like this with no
prayer?"
Rebbe Nachman of Breslov says that there's no reason for despair
- ever. The moment a person begins to make teshuva on his or her
loss of emuna, and this very minute decides to search for emuna,
Hashem's wrath is mitigated. The person's Joss of emuna triggered
Hashem's wrath in the first place, so his or her opposite action - the
search and yeaming to retum the emuna - arouses unlimited Divine
mercy, mitigating ail severe judgments and tuming them into
mercy. Mercy is a Divine illumination; when Hashem illuminates
our souls, it's so much easier to acquire emuna. If we continue
with this example, when our angry friend is placated and forgiving,
it's so much easier to request something from him or her. Now,
we can fully understand the nature of Hashem's prayer to Himself,
 A Father's Mercy 1 53

that His mercy may overcome His wrath, in order to prevent the
concealment of His Divine illumination.

The Most Beautiful Revelation

When ail is said and done, everything is for the very best!
Concealment is a tikkun, or rectification in and of itself, for
it stimulates a person to build, yeam and toi) for new kelim, or
spiritual vessels, which will enable us to absorb Divine illumination.
Our ratzon - the will, efforts, and yeaming to seek Hashem - is a
prime vesse! for the Divine illumination of emuna just as a crystal
goblet is for a fine wine. We wouldn't want to pour a thirty year-old
Chateau de Rothschild Cabernet wine in a broken or dirty glass, for
the wine would either spill on the floor or become ruined. A fine
wine necessitates a whole and immaculately clean goblet. By the
same token, without proper vessels, a person can't receive Divine
illumination. Hashem doesn't want to spill His "fine wine" on the
floor - we must be able to contain it.
Without challenges and times of difficulty in our lives, we'd never
seek emuna. lfsomeone had perfect health, plenty ofmoney, career
success, marital bliss, and wonderful children, he or she would
most likely never seek Hashem. Hashem doesn't want a person to
stagnate spiritually. In that respect, concealment is a gift. The life
difficulties that are manifestations of concealment stimulate prayer.
Deficiency ignites effort and yeaming to seek Hashem. Effort and
yeaming in tum build new and stronger vessels to hold the Divine
illumination of emuna that brings us closer to Hashem.
Breslover tradition, handed down from teacher to pupil for the last
two hundred years, teaches that in the future - after the sin ofAdam
is rectified - the world will be far more beautiful than it would have
been had Adam never sinned.
With the aggregate of the entire world's prayers and upheavals
resulting from concealment throughout the generations, and ail the
world's efforts to reveal the concealment since the dawn ofmankind,
imagine what beautiful new and wonderful vessels we now have,
that were nonexistent before Adam sinned. These vessels will hold
54 1 The Garden of Yearning

the illumination that reveals an exquisitely beautiful and rectified

world that's beyond our wildest dreams.
Once Adam sinned, when good and evil became mixed, the world
was in need of a tikkun; this tikkun requires prayer. Prayer has the
power of converting extreme unholiness into a vesse! of holiness.

I Cried Out from the Depths

A setback in life is really beneficial, as long as a persan doesn't
Jose heart from it. If a setback stimulates a new beginning and a
better second effort, it's wonderful! Rebbe Nachman cites Jonah's
cry from deep inside the belly of the whale (see Rebbe Nachman's
Discourses, 302) as the type of prayer we should ail strive for. Only
the eamest cries of a broken heart can pierce ail barriers, and uplift
the world from the depths of impurity.
Rather than losing heart from the setback, one needs to arouse
oneself and earnestly seek to reveal the concealed emuna, which
makes the persan - and the world - much more beautiful than if the
emuna were never concealed at ail. A setback and its subsequent
yeaming and renewed effort bring out the best in a persan. Life's
extreme difficulties reveal such lofty traits as valor and dedication,
which make a persan and the world so much more beautiful.
In truth, nothing is more beautiful than the pure prayer of a poor
person that flows forth from a broken heart. That's why Rebbe
Menachem Mendel of Kotsk would always say, "Nothing is more
whole than a broken heart!"

� he viceroy stood up, for he saw that the

��."king was very troubled, and asked that he
provide him with a servant, a horse, and money
for the journey, and set out to search for her ...

Seeing the king's distress, the viceroy set out to search for the lost
princess. This task- the search for emuna, to reveal the concealment
of Divine illumination, to discover that Hashem is the King, that
 A Father's Mercy 1 55

there's a Creator who govems the world with a mind-boggling

precision down to the tiniest detail, and that everything He does
is for the very best - is the task of every one of us. Certainly, the
great tzaddikim are more preoccupied with this task than the man
on the street, and on a higher level than the average persan, but that
doesn't prevent or exempt each of us from doing our part. Each of
us must reveal his or her own private princess, his or her persona!
portion of emuna, and thereby contribute to the rectification of the
entire world until everyone recognizes the Monarchy of Hashem.

For Hashem's Sake

When asking for emuna, one needs a pure motive and not persona!
interest or gain. As we see in our tale at hand, the king's distress
motivated the viceroy to set out on the search, not the latter's hope
of reward and the like. We too should seek emuna simply for
Hashem's sake, for that's what Hashem wants from us, and not for
any other reason such as etemal bliss or the title of "tzaddik" and
so forth - and certainly not for material reasons such as enhanced
incarne and good health.
Why? Hashem created the world for a purpose. He desires that we
feel sorry when His will is not fulfilled in the world, and the world
fails to fulfill its obligations to Hashem.
The purpose of the world is to reveal Hashem's monarchy, so that
every living thing shall know that Hashem is the King, as we pray
on Rosh Hashanah: "And every creature shall know that Hashem
created it, and every living thing shall declare, Hashem the God
of Israel is King, and His dominion is over everything." This is
emuna.

çf,(� servant, a horse, and money for the

�iourney ...

The viceroy requested three tools to help him perform his task in the
world. The servant is allegorical to the soul, the horse symbolizes
the body, and money for the journey represents a livelihood.
56 1 The Garden of Yearning

The viceroy only requested money for the journey to perform his
task. We too need an income in order to live in this world and to do
our task of searching for emuna. Yet, the tool of an income should
not be confused with the task at hand. One should not devote an
entire life to searching for more money - the tool - rather than
searching for emuna - the task. When a person first sets out on
the search for emuna, he or she doesn't yet have a strong spiritual
vessel of trust in Hashem. Therefore, one is advised to ask Hashem
for an income as a free gift, since he or she doesn't yet have the
proper level of trust in Hashem that justifies the abundance of an
adequate income. We all need enough to live on so that we can
serve Hashem with composure, until we attain the proper level
of trust in Hashem. As we see in our tale, the viceroy attained a
befitting level of trust only in the end after extensive toil. Until
then, his income was a free gift.

Until I Become a Kosher Person

We learn this concept from Rebbe Nathan of Breslov: When he
first became a disciple of our holy Rebbe Nachman, he had terrible
distress from his wife, his parents, and his in-laws. Their main
complaint was, "How will you make a living if you're learning and
praying all day long?" Rebbe Nathan gavé in, and opened a store.
His wife waited on customers, but she didn't know the prices of the
goods, so she had to run back and forth between the store and the
study hall to ask Rebbe Nathan. Clearly, that's not the way to run
a business, and they suffered with a meager income. In his sorrow,
Rebbe Nathan prayed to Hashem like this:
"Hashem! For one to deserve money without toil, one must be a
kosher person. Until I become a kosher person, it'll take time. In
the meantime, please give me an income as a free gift, so that I can
serve You and rectify myself and become a truly kosher person."
Hashem heeded Rebbe Nathan's prayer, the product of a broken
heart. At the same time that Rebbe Nathan prayed, his father met
with his business partners, who came up with a superb idea: "Since
your son Nathan yearns to spend each waking hour in the service
 A Father's Mercy 1 57

of Hashem and leaming Torah, and his mind isn't into commerce,
give us his inventory and we'll buy and sell for him. We'll send hirn
his periodic share of the profits, so he won't have to leave the house
of study anymore."
Rebbe Nathan's father agreed, and from that day on Rebbe Nathan
received his monthly profits without lifting a finger in commerce.
His one prayer - the prayer of a broken heart - opened up the gate
of abundance for many years.
As such, the viceroy is in essence asking from Hashem a livelihood
as a free gift, so that he can embark on his journey to seek ernuna.

�, nd set out to ask for her ...

0

We must note Rebbe Nachman's choice of terms; he tells us that the

viceroy set out to "ask" for the lost princess, rather than "search"
for her. Rebbe Nachman is telling us that one doesn't have to
search for emuna, for emuna is right here, but concealed. Our job
is to ask for emuna, constantly yeaming, praying, and appealing to
Hashem's Divine mercy until the concealment ends and emuna is
revealed to us.

ot:f e asked exhaustingly for a very long time,

4:.,W/until he found her. (And following is the
account of how he asked for her, until he found
her). He went from place to place, for a very
long time, in deserts, fields and forests. And he
asked for her a very long time.

Rebbe Nachman emphasizes the efforts of the viceroy, telling us

that "He asked exhaustingly for a very long time." This shows
the enormous desire that's required in order to find the lost princess.
Rebbe Nachman is teaching us that we should seek, ask, and desire
emuna with our hearts and ail our might, with ail our senses and
with all our desires. And despite our efforts and our yeaming,
we should still know that it will take time until we find the lost
pnncess.
58 1 The Garden of Yearning

One must carefully prepare for a long journey. Likewise, we too

must make the proper emotional preparation - equipping ourselves
with the needed patience, persona[ commitment, and desire that
our journey will require. Seeking emuna is likely to be a long and
difficult process, strewn with obstacles of every shape and form,
and sometimes frustrating and disappointing. But, we should
never surrender our desires and never submit to despair. With
perseverance - as Rebbe Nachman teaches us - each of us will
ultimately find his or her own lost princess.
 A Path to the Side 1 59

Chapter Six

A Path to the Side

/fi' s he was crossing a desert, he saw a path

�tto the side, and he was composing
himself: "Seeing that l've been going such a
long lime in the desert and I cannot find her,
l'll try this path - maybe l'll corne to a settled
area ... 11

After years of asking for the lost princess, the viceroy suddenly
sees a path to the side. He decides to depart from the beaten track
in favor of pursuing this path to the side. This is allegorical to
the discovery of a new type of prayer - the persona! prayer, or
hitbodedut, which takes us off the beaten track of prayer that most
people pursue.
A "path" is a narrow way with room for single-file walking only.
As such, "path" signifies persona! prayer.
Even though we have many exalted and wonderful prescribed prayer
collections such as our prayer books, Psalms, Likutei Tefillot, and
more, to find the lost princess - emuna - we need persona! prayer.
Now we can understand what the viceroy seems to be saying to
himself: "l've been walking down the beaten path for years, and I
haven't yet found the lost princess ..." - he's been on the same beaten
track that everyone else uses, the well-known road of prescribed
prayer. This is a road that never changes and that everyone knows.
This is allegorical to one's rote daily praying, which hasn't been
enough for finding emuna. But suddenly, the viceroy sees a path
to the side, and composes himself: "l'll try this path! Maybe it will
lead me to a settled area!" Sure enougb, wben be took this path,
be found the princess.
The viceroy understood that he must connect his persona! prayer
- his soul-searching, praises and thanks to Hashem, reflections,
60 1 The Garden of Yeaming

and requests that reflect his individual soul's daily and hourly
needs - to his unique situation at any given time. This is a prayer
than cannot be written or presc1ibed anywhere, for it changes from
moment to moment like a kaleidoscope, whose exquisite colors
reflect the time, place, and individual circumstance of the body and
soul. The viceroy realized that only this type of prayer can take him
to a "settled area", a place where he can settle the turmoil within his
soil and attain his true tikkun, or soul correction.

Every Morning is New

Each ofus has his or her own individual personal path. Our path in
life is as unique as our fingerprint, in accordance with our mission
in life, former reincarnations, and our individual tikkun. Although
there are general tasks that each persan must do on this earth, each
person has a unique and individual way of completing a given
task. One cannot attain happiness or fulfillment in life without
asce1taining his or her unique path. Without persona! prayer, this
is virtually impossible. Persona! prayer can't be found in any book;
not only does it change from person to person, it changes within a
person himself from day to day and from hour to hour, according to
a person's current circumstances and according to the stimuli that
Hashem sends at that given moment.
We can therefore conclude that persona! prayer varies from day
to day. Yesterday's prayers don't necessarily answer today's needs.
Every single day, each of us must ask: "What does Hashem want
from me today - here and now? What must I correct, what must I
pray for, how should I thank Hashem for the past and request my
needs for the future?" Each morning is new. Each day has special
things to thank Hashem for. The way and depth of expressing
our gratitude to Hashem vary according to a person's spiritual
cognizance at any given time and according to his or ber current
circumstance.
The two most important elements of persona! prayer, as we
mentioned earlier, are clarifying the truth and composing
ourselves. With self composure, we literally expand our powers of
 A Path to the Sicle 1 61

mind and soul. The search for truth keeps those powers on the right
track. As in navigation, maintaining the proper heading assures a
safe arrivai at our destination.

The Point of Truth within the Truth

Proper personal prayer requires a point of truth. For example, when
we seek a solution to - or salvation from - a problem or deficiency,
we must first pray for emuna. That way, we can believe that all of
life's difficulties corne from Hashem and are His will. We should
know that Hashem does nothing at random, and that everything is
precisely directed from above.
Afterwards, we should ask Hashem to help us believe that
everything is for the very best - even the problems and deficiencies
- in order to help us accomplish our mission in life. True, we all
want to solve our problems quickly. But, the point of truth within
the truth is that our problems are a persona! message from Hashem,
to facilitate our soul c01Tection and the performance of our mission
on earth. Therefore, we should ask Hashem to instill in us the desire
to comprehend the underlying message of our problem, deficiency,
or tribulation, rather than the desire to be rescued from it.
The point of truth within the truth of persona! prayer is the
desire to establish a connection with Hashem and to understand
His messages. Complaints about those messages - which often
manifest themselves as trials and tribulations - are tantamount
to telling Hashem that one doesn't want to listen to Him, Heaven
forbid. "Go away, Hashem! I don't want to listen to what You're
trying to tell me ..." is the statement of the complainer. If getting
closer to Hashem is truth, then distancing oneself from Hashem is
the opposite.
The complainer forgets the important point; namely, that all his
troubles are gifts from Hashem to bring him closer. Every trial
and tribulation carries its own message. Hashem never punishes
- He educates and communicates. If a person's sole desire is to get
rid of the trial or tribulation, then how will he learn what Hashem
wants him to learn? What about ail the enhanced tools - intellect,
62 The Garden of Yearning
1

experience, and abilities - that Hashem wants to give by way of the

trials and tribulations?
Hashem sends a myriad of messages to us every day. Sorne are
designed to stimulate teshuva for a particular misdeed. Sorne are
designed to lead a person to the performance of a given mitzvah.
Still others are aimed at arousing us from our spiritual slumber so
that we won't stagnate.
So long as a person desires a quick solution to a problem, he or
she won't avoid a negative attitude toward Hashem. King Solomon
said (Proverbs 13: 12), "A drawn out hope brings sickness to the
heart." Simply hoping for a solution doesn't solve a problem, and
only brings a person to complain that Hashem isn't answering his
or her prayers. But, once a person understands Hashem's message
that's concealed within the problem, then Hashem doesn't need the
problem anymore.

The Point of Truth at all Costs

Even if are not yet living the point of truth within the truth, and
we're not capable of personal prayer that's directed at getting to
know Hashem rather than at quick solutions either, we should still
never surrender the point of truth, which is: "There is no one other
than Hashem. I am nul!. There is no addressfor anything other than
Hashem. Only Hashem can help me. Only Hashem knows what's
bestfor me. I have no idea what my soul came down ta this earthfor
and what the challenges are that I mustface. Only Hashem knows."
When we truly evaluate ourselves, and realize how difficult it
is to know what Hashem truly wants from us in our particular
circumstance, then we should appeal to Hashem with this point of
truth, and beg Him, asking: "Hashem, please have mercy on me.
Teach me how to do Your will! I have no idea where I am in the
world or where I should be going. Should I prayfor a certain thing
that's not what I have in mind? What points in my character should
I be working on? Where should I be more elaborate or specific
in my prayers? Hashem, please direct me! Only You can lead me
down the right pathfor me!"
 A Path to the Side 1 63

This way, anyone can arrive at the type of earnest persona! prayer
that opens Heavenly doors. Such prayers - the prayers of a poor
person in the doorway - are especially beautiful and unlock the
true gates of salvation.

çi§(" nd he went a very long time on that path.

�·Afterward, he saw a castle, with several
soldiers standing guard around it. The castle
was very attractive, well-built, and extremely
orderly with the guards Posted ...

The viceroy reached an extremely beautiful castle, about which he

knew nothing ...

. . . and he was worried that the guards would not

let him in. But he composed himself and said, "I
will go and try ... "

The viceroy saw the castle surrounded by walls and guards,

rendering any logical chance of entering impossible. But, he
stopped and composed himself, coming to the superb conclusion
that he'll go and try anyway. Likewise, a person that's faced with
difficulties in life shouldn't be discouraged by the "high walls," the
apparent obstacles that stand in the way. Persona! courage means
trying anyway, for without t1ying, there's certainly no success. So,
ifwe try, what do we have to lose?
Rebbe Nachman of Breslov addresses this issue (see Likutei
Moharan I: 115), saying:
"'And the people stood from afar, and Moses approached the thick
cloud where God was, (Shemot 20: 18).' One who walks the path of
materialism his whole life, and then becomes enthused and desires
to walk in the ways of Hashem, then the [Hashem's] Measure of
Judgment accuses that person, and prevents him from walking in
the ways of Hashem, and summons an obstacle where Hashem
Himself is concealed within that obstacle.
64 1 The Garden of Yearning

"A man of reason, when examining the obstacle, finds Hashem ... a
man without reason sees an obstacle and immediately retreats.
"An obstacle is an aspect of the thick cloud. The thick cloud is
darkness. 'And the people stood from afar,' for the masses retreat
when they see an obstacle. But Moses, the epitome of reason and
spiritual cognizance, 'approached the thick cloud where God was,'
in other words, Moses approached the obstacle, for he knew that
Hashem was hiding within the cloud."
Rebbe Nachman is teaching us that the incognizant fall into despair
the moment they see an obstacle. Even if such a person does try to
overcome, he quickly gives up and says, "This isn't for me!" But
a person with sense - with even a minimal measure of spiritual
cognizance - isn't incapacitated by the mere thought of an obstacle,
for he knows that Hashem is everywhere, within the obstacle too!
Such a person composes himself and says, "l'll give it a try! What
do I have to lose? If Hashem wants me to succeed, I'll succeed!
And if I don't succeed, my lack of success is also a message from
Hashem, so I'll try and understand the message."

cê." o he left the horse behind, and approached

W" the castle. And the guards ignored him
and did not hinder him. He went from room to
room without disturbance, and came to one
reception hall, where the king sat, wearing his
crown. And there were a number of guards, and
musicians with their instruments standing
before him. It was all very pleasant and
beautiful, and neither the king nor any of the
others asked him anything at all ...

When the viceroy makes an innocent effort to enter the castle, it

tums out that no one is standing in his way, neither guards nor
anyone else. He enters, and roams freely until he reaches the hall
of the king.
The reason that no one hinders the viceroy is that he prayed
extensively. When a person invests effort in prayer, then he
 A Path to the Side 1 65

benefits from Divine assistance in accomplishing his task. Even

the Yetzer Hara helps a person that prays, for it is written (see
Proverbs, ch. 16), "When Hashem is pleased with a person's ways,
even his enemies will reconcile with him."
lt tums out that a person with true emuna doesn't have an Evil
Inclination at all, for he sees Hashem in everything, even in the
difficulties that one normally attributes to the Evil Inclination
himself. A person with emuna knows that even the Yetzer Hara is in
Hashem's hands, and ail the Yetzer's obstacles and temptations are
the products of Divine providence. The apparent hindrances in our
life are ail from Hashem for our ultimate welfare, so that we'll seek
Hashem, intensify our prayers, and search for Hashem's wisdom in
every little thing until we attain the level of perfect emuna.
A person that lives a life of emuna is exclusively tied to Hashem;
such a person never rubs elbows with the- Evil Inclination at all.
When he encounters an obstacle, he knows that the obstacle
is from Hashem and ail for the best. He's neither weakened nor
scared away. He doesn't become confused and disoriented- he just
increases his prayers and his requests for Hashem's help. As such,
he serves Hashem with ail his faculties - with his Good Inclination
and his Evil Inclination alike.
Anytime that a person walks in the path of emuna and prays
profusely for whatever he needs, then everyone cornes to his aid,
even the Sitra Achra (dark side) and the Yetzer Hara themselves.
Even the forces of evil are subservient to Hashem, and as soon as
Hashem decides that a person deserves something, then everyone
must implement the Divine decision and assist the person whom
Hashem favors. As such, things fall into place without hindrances.
Rebbe Nathan of Breslov said before his death: "During my old
age everything is falling into place because I spent so much time in
persona! prayer during my younger years."

cJ9( nd he saw there delicacies and fine foods,

0

�;and he stood and ate and went to lie down

in a corner, to see what would transpire there ...
66 1 The Garden of Yearning

"He stood" means that he prayed, for standing (in Hebrew, amida)
connotes prayer. We see here - as in the continuation of our tale
- that the viceroy doesn't do a thing without praying beforehand;
he therefore prays before he eats, and then lies down in a corner.
The viceroy lies down in the corner for three particular reasons:
1. Common sense and personal safety. He doesn't yet know
anything about where he is. Therefore, he doesn't want to be
noticed and to attract attention. Who knows who these people are
- good or evil? Maybe it's harmful to speak to them, to divulge
information, or to corne under their influence? Because of these
uncertainties, be preferred "to lie clown in a corner," in other words,
to be inconspicuous.
2. Propriety. A new person in a new place should strive to blend
in with the new surroundings rather than clamor for attention. It's
best to refrain from forcing oneself on others, bothering them, or
ttying to become involved in other people's affairs. No one likes a
loud and gaudy nuisance, especially if the nuisance is a new person
in a new place.
3. Modesty. The prophet Micah said, "Walk modestly with your
God." A servant of Hashem should always try to be quiet and
modest, speaking only when necessary, and not searching for fame
and glory. As such, the viceroy preferred to remain on the side, in
the shadows ...

f:J e saw that the king summoned for the

2�:queen. They went to bring her, and there
ensued a great commotion and joy. The
musicians played and sang a great deal, in that
they were bringing the queen. They placed a
chair for her and sat her next to the king. And
she was the above-mentioned princess, and he
(the viceroy) saw and recognized her. After
that, the queen gazed about and saw a man
lying in a corner, and recognized him. She
stood from her chair and went over to him,
 A Path to the Side 1 67

nudging him, and asked him, "Do you

recognize me?" He answered, "Yes, I do. You're
the lost princess." And he asked her, "How did
you get here?" She answered, "Because my
father blurted out the words 'The no good one
should take you', and here, this place, is no
good..."

The viceroy finds the princess is in a place of evil - that of the Sitra
Achra, the dark side. It tums out that the dark side also has a king
- an old and foolish one, with servants, guards, noblemen, and all
the equivalent hierarchy and counterparts of the holy side. Even
the foolish old king of evil knows that emuna is the most important
thing in the world, so be bas captured the princess - emuna - and
is keeping her captive in his domain.
This is the war of the dark side - to take away a person's emuna.
Our job is to redeem our emuna from the dark side's impure hands
and cling tightly to her, never losing her again.

i$\' nd he asked her, "How did you get here?"

0

�;'She answered, "Because my father blurted

out the words 'The no good one should take
you', and here, this place, is no good..."

We also learn from here just how cautious a persan should be

before uttering a spoken word. The consequences of a negative
utterance are liable to be far-reaching and tragic, as we see here
in our tale: The king's one utterance led to a terrible outcome, that
his daughter the princess would fall captive in the castle of the evil
Sitra Achra, the "no good one."
Negative speech includes any undesirable remark in addition to
epithets or insults. Bad tidings, unfavorable predictions, or finding
fault with both people and things are liable to cause serious
damage. Good speech, on the other hand, is beneficial to us and to
our surroundings.
 There is No Concealment 1 69

Chapter Seven

There is No Concealment

c�' o he told her that her father is very sorry,

� and has been searching for several years ...

One must know that the disappearance of emuna within a person

is Hashem's greatest s01Tow. Even if a person is suffering from
a temporary setback in Torah leaming, experiencing difficulty in
performing a ce1iain mitzvah, or fighting what seems to be a losing
battle with a bad habit or bodily urge, as long as he or she clings to
the emuna that everything is for the best - and continues to talk to
Hashem about all these difficulties - Hashem doesn't have sorrow
from that person.
But, when someone has trials, tribulations, and setbacks while
disregarding Hashem and blames the whole world for his or her
troubles, then Hashem is much more disturbed by the absence of
that person's emuna than by his or her difficulties and failures.
Whatever happens to a person must happen; the test is whether
that person will cling to the emuna that everything is from
Hashem and for the very best. Indeed, Hashem's entire desire in
creating the world is that people believe in Him, speak to Him, ask
Him for ail their needs, and leam that everything He does is for the
very best. The objective of life's tests is to bring us to this end - to
speak to Hashem and to believe in Him. When a person suffers,
yet fails to recognize the Divine providence and fails to believe
that everything is for the best, then he has suffered for nothing.
Even worse, when he doesn't seek Hashem's help or seize the
opportunity to get closer to Hashem, then his suffering becomes
a ruined opportunity and therefore pointless. Pointless suffering
causes sorrow to Hashem. Hashem wanted the person to use the
difficult situation as a growth opportunity. But, when a person
fails to seek Hashem and emuna, the golden growth opportunity is
wasted and tums into pointless suffering.
 There is No Concealment 1 71

"Hashem, how will 1 know that I will inherit the land?" Sho1ily
thereafter, Hashem tells Abraham that his offspring will be slaves
in a foreign land. Our sages tell us that the outcome of Abraham's
sliver of doubt and his question was the bondage of his offspring in
Egypt. Here in our tale as well, a moment of doubt and hesitation
causes a lengthy delay in the redemption of the lost princess.

Emuna without Doubts

The slightest doubt in what we should be doing is a deficiency
of emuna. As here in the tale, if the viceroy would have known
without a doubt that Hashem wanted him to rescue the princess
immediately, he would have ignored any obstacle and overcome
any trepidation to perform his mission and thus bring the geula, or
redemption.
Lack of firm conviction is a deficiency of emuna. Why? If one's
emuna is complete, knowing that Hashem wants him to do a
certain thing or act a certain way, then nothing else in the world
matters. When juxtaposed with Hashem's will, everything else is
null and void! If Hashem wants the princess rescued, then there're
no walls, no guards, and no Sitra Achra, for nothing can stand in
Hashem's way. That's how King David can declare so forcefully
(Psalms 118:10), "Ail the nations surround me - in the Name of
Hashem, I eut them down!"
King David was positive that even if ail the nations of the world
with millions of hostile troops would descend upon Jerusalem and
surround him - he would rely on Hashem's Name! He would depend
completely on emuna. He would mow them down like grass. Now
we understand how King David can declare (ibid, 23), "Though
I walk in the valley of death, I shall not fear, for You are with
me ... " With complete emuna, there is no fear, no matter what.
Rebbe Nachman of Breslov elaborates on this concept with the
following tale (see Likutei Moharan 11:46), told in the name of his
great grandfather the Baal Shem Tov:
72 The Garden of Yearning
1

"A king placed a treasure box in a certain place, and surrounded it

with an optical illusion of great and mighty walls. People drew near
and saw what seemed to them to be real walls that were difficult
to breach. Sorne of them retreated on the spot. Others broke down
the first wall, but couldn't break down the second wall. Still others
broke down subsequent walls, but not all of them. Then came the
king's son, who said: "I know that the walls are only an illusion; in
reality, there are no walls." So he walked with confidence, until he
passed them all. From here, the wise can understand the moral that
all the obstacles and all the temptations and all the incitements [of
the Evil Inclination - LB] are like walls placed around the treasure
ofyirat Shamaim, the fear of God, which are in actuality nothing.
The important thing - a strong and brave heart, for then there are
no obstacles. Particularly, the obstacles of materialism, such as:
money, or obstacles from his wife, children, in-laws or parents and
so forth, they are all nullified in the face of a heart that is strong
and brave in the Name ofHashem. Even the might ofheroes stems
from a strong heart that is not afraid of contact in battle."

� nd she answered, "It's �mpossible for you

..,%:'v-" to get me out of here ...
0

Since the viceroy expressed a hint of doubt with his question,

revealing a deficiency of emuna, the princess answered: "It's
impossible for you to get me out ofhere," for you still ask questions.
She seems to be telling him that as long as the walls, the guards,
or anything else other than Hashem deters him, he won't be able to
get her out.
But, hope is never lost:

" ...$ff'T nless you choose a place, and dwell

�..-olhere a full year. And the whole year,
you must yearn to take me out. Any time that
you have free, you should only yearn and pray
and hope to free me. And you should fast
frequently, and on the last day of the year, you
should fast and not sleep the entire day."
 There is No Concealment 1 73

The princess says to the viceroy: Since you're still asking questions,
you clearly haven't prayed enough yet. So, go pray and yeam that
emuna should be a part of you until you know that there is nothing
other than Hashem and that everything is under His power. Even
the Sitra Achra - the foolish old king - has no power and is nothing.
On the contrary, ifyour emuna will be steadfast, even the dark side
will fall at your feet and help you. So, go work for another whole
year on your emuna, and then, you'll be able to get me out ofhere.
One must yeam with a buming desire in order to attain emuna.
Desire is the key word ...
 The Eyes 1 75

Chapter Eight

The Eyes

�· o he went and did just that. On the last

�" day of the year, he fasted, and did not
sleep, and rose and began the journey back.
And on the way he saw a tree, and on it grew
very appealing apples. And they were
irresistibly tantalizing to his eyes ...

The viceroy follows the princess's instructions to the letter: He

chooses a place and goes there, utilizing every waking moment to
pray and yeam for emuna, and to strengthen himself for his task.
On the last day of the year, he fasts just like he was told to.
After he has done everything that the princess has told him to,
nothing is left for him to do other than retum to the princess
and rescue her from captivity. At that moment, on the verge of
redemption, the Evil Inclination overcomes him and knocks him
down. Where does the downfall of the viceroy begin? From the
eyes ...

The Eye Sees and the Heart Covets

Rabbi Zev "Velvel" Cheshin of blessed memory, one of the
prominent Breslover Chassidim of the previous generation, would
say in the name of the Zohar that the Yetzer Hara is not allowed
to enter a person except through the eyes. In our tale, we see this
principle clearly.Had the viceroy guarded his eyes - and that means
closing them, especially to temptation - he wouldn't have suffered
a setback and he'd have rescued the princess then and there.
The very first sin in the world - Adam's - began with the eyes, for
it is written (see Bereishit, chapter 3), "And the woman saw that
761 The Garden of Yearning

the tree is good for eating, for it was irresistible in her eyes and
pleasingly enlightening so she took from its fruit and gave it also
to her man with her and he ate."
All the blemishes imaginable - lust for women, lust for food, lust
for money, coveting, jealousy, and many more - all begin with the
eyes. Rashi teaches us (see his commentary of Parshat Shlach),
that "what the eye sees, the heart covets." This is literally a law
of nature - whenever the eye sees something appealing, the heart
immediately covets it, and the person is subjugated by the Yetzer
Hara. Once the Yetzer Hara seizes control, a person is liable to
commit every transgression imaginable. When we guard our eyes,
we're spared from all this trouble, for what we don't see, we don't
covet.
Let's go a step further: Hate, slander, greed, and confusion all start
from the eyes as well. When one stares at others, and compares
himself with them, he oftentimes belittles them to make himself
feel better. Few people are satisfied with what they have when they
look at their neighbors.

The First Choice

A person's first free-will choice in life is the eyes - whether to open
them or to close them. If a person doesn't close bis eyes, he !oses
bis free will, for he'll fall prey to the Yetzer Hara and to all kinds of
temptations and bodily urges. Closing ones eyes is the only way to
avoid coveting; only then does one gain the free choice of thinking
about Hashem or falling into a state of arrogance. This choice
doesn't exist while the eyes are darting from one object to another.
As we said, "the eye sees and the heart covets; when the heart
covets something forbidden, it becomes spiritually defiled. Such
impurity - the result of thoughts - is often worse than a forbidden
act itself.
Therefore, one only bas choice when the eyes are closed. Then, the
choice is between thinking about Hashem, that there is no one other
than Him, for He gives us the ability to see, among other things,
or falling into a state of anogance, thinking: "What a tzaddik I am!
 The Eyes 177

Look how I walk around with my eyes closed!" and so forth.

When a persan doesn't close his eyes, free choice doesn't even
begin. Such a persan !oses connection with his ultimate purpose
in life, for he surely forgets Hashem because of all that his eyes
have seen. Each one of us must arouse ourselves and strengthen
ourselves on this point. Even in places where we're permitted to
open our eyes, we need extensive Divine mercy in order to prevent
this world from confusing us and in order to ding to Hashem
constantly. By opening one's eyes, one literally places himself into
a state of concealment - nothing could be a greater tragedy.

The Interna} Dimension of Guarding One's Eyes

The internai dimension of guarding one's eyes is emuna, when one
says to himself, "I live my life with Hashem, there is no one other
than Him, what else is there to see?" Such an individual realizes
that every thought, utterance, and deed in life should be according
to Hashem's will. Since Hashem commanded us to close our eyes,
then that's exactly what we should do! Rabbi Eliahu Lapian of
blessed memory said that our forefather Abraham didn't lift his
eyes from bis immediate two square meters ail the days of his life.
When describing the Akeda, the sacrifice of Isaac (see Bereishit
22:4), the Torah says, "And Abraham lifted his eyes on the third
day, and saw the place from afar," in other words, Abraham lifted
bis eyes to see the cloud of the Shechinah, the Divine Presence,
atop of Mount Moriah.
The next time Abraham lifted his eyes was to take the sacrificial
ram that was sent to him in place of Isaac (ibid, verse 13): "And
Abraham lifted his eyes and saw, and behold a different ram was
entangled by the homs in the brambles, and Abraham went and
took the ram, and raised it on the altar as a sacrifice in lieu of his
son."
"And Abraham lifted bis eyes on the third day, and saw the place..."
Our sages teach that the place, in Hebrew hamakom, alludes to
the Divine Presence. Abraham's heart was unified; there was no
difference between his thoughts and his extemal actions. On an
78 The Garden of Yearning
1

intemal dimension, he only wanted to see Hashem. Therefore,

when be lifted his eyes, that's exactly what he saw - Hashem!
ln contrast, let's look at Esau. The Torah also says (ibid, chapter
33) that Esau "lifted his eyes." But what did he see? "...and he saw
the women." Esau guarded his eyes, for he grew up in the home
of a great tzaddik, his father Isaac. But, his heart harbored nothing
but lewd thoughts. So, as soon as be Iifted his eyes, be saw women.
Hashem takes us on the road that we choose for ourselves.
Rabbi Yaakov Abu Chatzeira of blessed memory asks: If everything
begins with the eyes, the why did the Torah mention the heart before
it mentioned the eyes, for it is written, "You shall not stray after the
heart and the eyes that you are pandering after them" (Bamidbar,
ch. 15).
The answer is simple and quite self-apparent: When a person
lives with emuna, he surely closes his eyes, so there's no need to
command him to close his eyes. But, the heart incites a person to
open his eyes, therefore the heart must be commanded first, as it is
written, "You shall not stray after the heart and the eyes."
Because of the heart's role in tempting a person, the Torah also
commands (Devarim, ch. 11), "Beware lest your heart tempt you to
stray and serve false gods and bow down to them." The Baal Shem
Tov of blessed memory explains that as soon as the heart tempts
- in other words, a person allows himself to be tempted by the
heart - immediately one strays and serves false gods, for he loses
his connection with emuna. Losing one's emuna is tantamount to
idol worship, for in spirituality, there's no middle ground.

What are You Looking For?

The viceroy made a valiant effort to rescue the princess - he
traversed the desert and outback for years until be finally found
ber in the castle. Even then, his job wasn't over, for he still had
an entire year of yeaming, praying, and spiritual strengthening
ahead of him. He did everything be was supposed to do until the
climactic final day when he didn't sleep and didn't eat. He invested
 The Eyes 1 79

tremendous effort. Now, just as it comes time to rescue the princess

- boom! He fell on bis face in utter failure! He opened bis eyes!
Can you imagine if this were a football game? People would be
yelling from the grandstands, "Hey, Mr. Viceroy! You're going to
rescue the princess! She's emuna! Close your eyes! Concentrate
on your goal! What are you looking for, other than emuna?!"
A person looks around like his neck is a tank turret when he thinks
there's anything in the world other than Hashem. If that's the case,
then he's not yet ready to redeem the princess, for if he had emuna,
he wouldn't look at anything.
Ask yourself: what are you looking for in life? Do you want emuna?
Do you want to know that there is nothing other than Hashem?
Then why do you walk around with your eyes wide open? What's
there to see? Are you going somewhere? Try to get there without
forgetting Hashem on the way ...

A Monumental Tzaddik - and Guardian of the

Eyes
Rebbe Nachman teaches (Likutei Moharan 1:67), that by guarding
the eyes, one sifts the good from the evil in one's character by
guarding the eyes. As long has one hasn't separated the good from
the evil, then every time he opens his eyes, evil has an influence,
leading to jealousy, hate, and lust. And, when someone sees
something expressly forbidden, then the evil literally overcomes
his soul, controlling all the limbs of his body; this is the reason
that negative emotions have such a profound influence on physical
health.
Only when one sifts the good from the evil within one's own character
- strengthening the good and discarding the evil - can be open his
eyes with no danger. Rebbe Nachman of Breslov reached such lofty
spiritual heights that in his eyes there was no difference between a
tree and a woman. Yet, he nevertheless guarded his eyes.
80 1 The Garden of Yearning

Other great tzaddikim who totally rid themselves of evil were

extremely cautions about guarding their eyes nonetheless. The
renowned tzaddik of the previous generation, Rabbi Yisrael Abu
Chatzeira the beloved "Baba Sali" ofblessed memory, maintained
an exalted level of holiness, particularly in everything that had to
do with the eyes. Now, if the great tzaddikim - who had totally
rid themselves of evil - were so careful about guarding their
eyes, shouldn't we? Since our own Evil Inclinations seek to trip
us every step of the way, we should certainly be careful about
guarding our eyes and denying evil the power to subdue us.
 Deep Sleep 1 81

Chapter Nine

Deep Sleep

cb(' nd on the way he saw a tree, and on it

�"grew very appealing apples. And they
were irresistibly tantalizing to his eyes, so he
approached and ate one. Right after eating the
apple, he dropped and fell asleep ...

Rebbe Nachman writes (Likutei Moharan 1:60, which is an

elaboration of our tale at hand), that there are those that fall into a
deep sleep because of improper eating. Specifically, he says:
"There are those who sleep their entire lives, even though they
think that they are serving Hashem, praying and leaming Torah,
but despite all their work, Hashem has no gratification from them,
for their deeds remain below, and lack the power to ascend.
"The principle vitality is the mind, for it is written: 'Wisdom shall
revive its host,' (Ecclesiastes, ch. 7). When a person's service of
Hashem is with the mind, it gains the vitality to ascend. But, when
the mind falls into a state of constriction, tantamount to dormancy,
then one cannot ascend.
"There are those who have fallen into a deep sleep by way of bodily
lusts and evil deeds. There are those who are fine and upright
people, but they fall because of eating. For sometimes when one
eats a certain food that hasn't properly been purified for human
consumption, the brain falls into slumber. Just as from a bodily
standpoint there are those foods that make a person drowsy and
those foods that arouse a person, so it is in spirituality, there are
foods that haven't properly been purified on a spiritual level, that
reduce a person to a state of spiritual slumber ... "

nd he slept a very long thne. His servant

fft'
�would try to wake him, but to no avail ...
82 1 The Garden of Yearning

If a person doesn't arouse himself, then nothing else will arouse

him. As much as the servant tried to wake the viceroy, he didn't
succeed. We always have free choice, and our principle free choice
is that we stimulate ourselves to search for truth. Without such
self-stimulation - even in the slightest - neither Torah nor rote
observance of mitzvot and the influence of tzaddikim will arouse a
person. Rebbe Nachman says:
"One must awaken the sleeper, and it's impossible to arouse the
sleeper until he awakens himself, for one must have stimulation
from below" [self arousal, as opposed to depending on stimulation
from above, or Divine arousal - LB].

ffi" fterwards, he awoke from his sleep, and

�:asked the servant, "Where am I in the
world?"

A persan wakes from spiritual slumber the minute he or she begins

asking questions about life: What's my purpose on earth? Why do I
feel a gnawing deficiency in rny life? Why don't I have satisfaction
and happiness? Shall I waste rny life on things of no consequence?
These questions arouse a person and bring him or her closer to the
true purpose of life. As such, as soon as the viceroy awakens, he
asks where he is in the world.

A.-:nd the servant told him the story ...

After the viceroy awoke, wbat is known in Kabbala as itaruta dilatata,

or self arousal, the servant told him the "story." Allegorically, the
servant told him tales ofyesteryear to help the viceroy's reawakening.
Rebbe Nachrnan writes (ibid), "Only when he arouses himself, can
outside stimulation prevent him from further slurnber."
When a person falls into spiritual sleep, in other words, when he
loses focus on his purpose in life and therefore loses his connection
with emuna - then he must be aroused by tales of yesteryear. Before
Rebbe Nachman would tell his tales, he'd say, "Now I shall begin
to tell a tale." His intention was that no conventional Torah lesson
 Deep Sleep 83 1

could wake his listeners from their spiritual slumber, only a tale.
Within his tales were the loftiest esoteric secrets of Torah, for even
the great Kabbalists testified that all the principles of Kabbala are
alluded to in Rebbe Nachman's tales.

Facial Illumination
Rebbe Nachman further explains that when a person falls into
spiritual slumber, he loses his facial illumination, his Divine image.
A person that falls into spiritual slumber falls from emuna and from
the seventy faces of Torah, for emuna is the mind and wisdom of
Torah. Since a person's wisdom illuminates his face, a fall from
emuna - the epitome of wisdom - means losing one's facial
illumination. With no facial illumination, one has no countenance
at all. Therefore, to awaken a person, he must be shown his facial
illumination, in other words, the emuna that can illuminate his mind
and soul. But, as Rebbe Nachman teaches, this holy illumination
must be clothed within a seemingly-mundane tale and not in a
conventional Torah lesson, for the following reasons:
1. When curing a blind person, he must be shown light gradually, little
by little, for a sudden illumination will be blinding. The Chassidic
tale is in effect a garment that reduces the illumination of spiritual
arousal. A person that might not be capable of absorbing a Torah
ethics lecture can certainly listen to and be influenced by a tale.
2. The light of the tzaddik's message must be clothed within a tale to
hide it from the dark-side elements, to prevent them from clinging
to such high-level holiness.
3. The dark-side forces that influence a person who's trapped in
spiritual slumber won't allow him to listen to a Torah lesson; but,
they won't prevent him from listening to tales about blacksmiths,
horses, and the like. The Chassidic tale in which the Rebbe bides
an inner meaning brings a person to Torah and to emuna without
stimulating the resistance of the dark side.
Apparently, the tale has no connection to the Torah. The dark forces
of evil (a person's own Evil Inclination) are caught off guard; they
84 1 The Garden of Yearning

don't care if he listens to bubba mysis, old grandma's tales all day
long. But, within the words of the tzaddiks tales are hidden the
light of arousal that stimulates a person to teshuva and to yeaming
for Hashem, so he can break free of the Yetzer's grasp.

çi§.(" nd the ser�ant told him the story: "You

.
�:were sleepmg a very long hme, several
years. And I survived on the fruit... "

Here, a nagging question arises: The viceroy fell asleep from his
eating; the servant ate from the same fruit. Why didn't he fall asleep
too?
The answer is, as we indicated earlier, that the servant alludes to the
soul, and the soul doesn't "fall asleep," for it continues to be the life
source that vitalizes a person. Even when the soul is in a period of
stagnation, or spiritual slumber, outwardly it seems that the person
is still awake, speaking, acting, and functioning. He could even
be leaming Torah or going through the motions of praying, even
though he's spiritually dormant. Like Rebbe Nachman said, there
are those that sleep their days away, even though they think they're
serving Hashem, learning Torah, and praying ...
A person in a spiritual deep sleep is certainly alive from a biological
standpoint; such a person derives his low-level animal vitality
from bodily amenities and passing enjoyments. Nevertheless, that
person's neshama, or inner Divine soul, is not getting what it needs
and therefore sinks into a deep sleep. With no connection to emuna,
the neshama sleeps; the bodily shell seems alive, but in actuality,
it's in a state of walking dormancy. ln Rebbe Nachman's terms,
such people "sleep their days away."
The concept of sleep belongs to the neshama, for when the
neshama doesn't illuminate a person, she doesn't share with that
person ail the wonderful things that are happening to her every
minute. The neshama enjoys sublime glimpses of Divine wisdom
every single second; one's body clouds the messages transmitted
from the neshama. The thicker and more crass the body, the less
the neshama illuminates.
 There'sN0SadnessintheWorld185

ChapterTen

There's No Sadness in the World

,S
nd he was very remorseful...
0

Apparently, the viceroy's remorse is clearly understandable: He

invested tremendous effort in locating the princess, and once
he finally found her, he was forced to complete another year of
extreme effort. And here, at the very last minute, he failed! What a
disappointment!
In truth, sadness and remorse are major blemishes in emuna.
The viceroy must understand that if he has not yet succeeded
in redeeming the princess, he's not yet worthy of redeeming the
princess. He still needs more prayer and more emuna to fulfill his
task.
The proof is that the viceroy went to rescue the princess with open
eyes. One can't obtain the princess - emuna -with open eyes!
It's impossible to rescue emuna without being connected to emuna.
Why open your eyes when there's nothing to see but Hashem? Our
consolation to the viceroy is this: Since you're not yet on the level of
emuna where you can redeem the princess, be happy that you didn't
redeem her! Be happy that you now know your true spiritual level,
namely, that you need more work. False success clouds judgment;
be happy that you haven't fooled yourself. Keep on working and
praying, and with desire, you'll eventually succeed.

Lifelong Work
Any remorse a person has stems from the fact that he's striving for
the outcome rather than for the work. A person that desires to serve
Hashem should be interested in the service and not in the results.
He or she should simply love to serve Hashem. If the service of
Hashem means more prayer and more effort, then he or she should
be happy with that.
86 1 The Garden of Yeaming

A goal-oriented person regards attaining bis goal as the completion

of bis task. Afterwards, be thinks be can sit out on the beach and
relax, because the work is over. In the service of Hashem, such an
outlook is totally wrong, for there's always more work to do. As
long as one lives, there's more to do. In that respect, the viceroy's
remorse is unjustifiable. He's serving the king, and before he
continues to a new task, be bas more work to do at the present task.
Why be sad?
The trials and challenges that are sent to a person are merely tests
designed to show that person where he or she is really holding on
the spiritual ladder. IfHashem helps us to succeed in our test, it's a
sign that we've reached and earned a given spiritual level. Hashem
knows that we won't rest there on our laurels, but will continue to
work bard and strive for more. Hashem gives us challenges to uplift
us, making us constantly strive for more, just as a coach makes his
weightlifters lift a little more every day, so they'll get stronger and
achieve new heights.
If a person doesn't succeed, there's no mistake - he simply
isn't prepared to pass the test. The fact that he was looking
for results, reward, and relaxation means that he is not yet
deserving of that particular spiritual level. Therefore, Hashem
doesn't enable him to succeed, so that he'll learn bis proper place,
namely, that be bas much more work to do. Rather than falling
into sadness, depression and disappointment, he should rise to the
challenge, strengthen bis prayers and yeaming for Hashem, and
make his best effort until Hashem belps him cling to a new and
bigher dimension of emuna. Only tben, will be be ready to redeem
the princess.

The Joy of Recognition

When a person doesn't succeed in one of life's tests, then he should
thank Hashem profusely for not giving him false success, illusions
ofgrandeur, and spiritual levels that he doesn't deserve. The greatest
joy is recognizing one's own reality - where we stand and our task
at hand. We should continue to serve Hashem with patience and
 There'sNoSadnessinthe World187

perseverance, yeaming and praying with joy and with complete

faith until we achieve the next higher level that we're striving for.
Once we're truly worthy, Hashem will give us our new madrega,
or spiritual level, beautifully and wonderfully; we'll know that
it cornes from Hashem. As such, we won't feel conceited; we'll
simply strive for more.
This is exactly what the princess is instructing the viceroy in the
continuation of our tale: Go find a new place, stay there for a year,
and so forth. The princess is telling the viceroy to continue praying
and yeaming, for experience has shown that his efforts haven't
been adequate to accomplish the task at hand. Sadness and despair
contribute nothing.

çjf" o he returned there and found her. And

"W"' she revealed her great distress to him ...
The princess's sorrow, an allusion to the sorrow of the Shechinah,
or Divine Presence, is not a blemish in emuna. Her sorrow is true
sorrow, the sorrow of holiness that people are trapped in darkness
so far away from emuna that they can't see Hashem's magnificent
Divine Providence over all of His creations.
In truth, were it not for the viceroy's sorrow, the princess wouldn't
have been distressed at all. Her only sorrow is the concealment.
If the viceroy would have believed that his failure was also from
Hashem, then the continuation of his task would have been much
easier, and the princess wouldn't be so upset about him.
At every moment, a person has the free choice of clinging to
Hashem and to emuna, for there's no place in the world where a
person can't reach out for Hashem. Hashem is everywhere, even in
the lowest and most desolate places on earth.
Therefore, when a person clings to the simple faith that everything
cornes from Hashem, then he's not in concealment at all. No matter
how he falls or fails, if he believes that his setback cornes from
Hashem and continues to serve Hashem withjoy, then Hashem has
no sorrow. Hashem's only sorrow is when people don't believe that
88 1 The Garden of Yearning

everything is from Him and for the very best - failures, setbacks,
ups, downs, everything!

"qf"� f you had only corne on the prescribed

�'""'day, you would have taken me out of here.
And because of one day, you lost..."

Here, Rebbe Nachman ofBreslov is alluding to a passage in Psalm

95, "Today, ifyou heed His voice," which he elaborates in Likutei
Moharan I:272, as follows:
"'Today, if you heed His voice,' is an important guideline in the
service of Hashem, that one should not look at anything other
than the day at hand. Both in the business of making a living and
seeking ones needs, one shouldn't think from one day to the next,
as our holy books say. The same goes for the service of Hashem.
One should not regard anything other than that particular day
and that particular hour. For when a person desires to enter in the
service ofHashem, it seems to be a heavy weight that's impossible
to carry. But, when one thinks only of the day at band, he doesn't
have a heavy load at all, and also won't push things off from today
until tomorrow, saying: Tomorrow l'll begin, tomorrow l'11 pray
earnestly, and so forth with other tasks. A person has nothing in his
world other than the particular day and hour at band, for tomorrow
is an entirely different world. 'Today, if you heed His voice,' -
'today' specifically, and understand."
When a person is occupied with something, whether a mundane
task or a spiritual one, he should concentrate on the present task
and not think about anything else. Rebbe Nathan of Breslov
instructed his son Yitzchak, who worked as a postal clerk and was
confused about the best way of meeting all his obligations, the
best way to serve Hashem. He said: "When you work at the post
office, concentrate on your work, to prevent mistakes. But, the
minute you leave the post office, forget completely about your
work and focus all your thoughts on Hashem and on His Divine
service."
Rebbe Nathan also wrote that this advice was the only way that
 There'sNoSadnessinthe World189

Rebbe N achman succeeded in accomplishing what he accomplished

(see Shivchei Haran, 14):
"His daily workload was enormous and very difficult. lt was so
difficult that he could barely withstand the heaviness of the yoke
ofhis responsibilities. Only by this advice could he continue with
his work, namely, that each day, he'd think that he had no other
concerns other than that particular day, and that way, he could carry
the weight ofthat day's responsibilities. For a person is capable of
doing anything in the world on one particular day, since it's only a
single day; then, on the morrow, he would only look at that day.
"He acted this way always, never thinking about anything but
that particular day, and that way, he could carry the load that was
so heavy. Without this, he couldn't have withstood the strain of
his many activities in the service of Hashem, each done with
tremendous strain and effort, which would have added up to an
impossible Joad. The only way he succeeded was with this advice
- not to think ofanything other than that particular day. 11
This is what the princess says to the viceroy: "And because ofone
day, you lost." Since your service ofHashem wasn't "one day," in
other words, since you didn't focus exclusively on the day at band,
you failed. You only have today - nothing else - so concentrate
on your present task. If you'd have focused on what you were
supposed to do, you wouldn't have strayed aside to eat a forbidden
apple, and you would have redeemed me.

Don't Worry about Tomorrow

"Today, ifyou heed His voice," the principle oftaking each day at
a time is the key to serving Hashem properly and winning the war
against the Yetzer Hara. With one day at a time, one can withstand
any hardship. Also, when trying to overcome a temptation, bad
habit, or a bodily urge, it's much easier to succeed by taking each
hour at a time and each day at a time. Once the Yetzer Hara has
been repelled for a short duration, it will leave completely.
An old Arab expression says that ifyou load a camel's back straw
90 1 The Garden of Yearning

by straw, then the camel can carry five hales. But, if you drop a
bale on its back all at once, you'll break its back. In like fashion,
the Yetzer Hara shows a persan that he or she won't be able to
withstand such a lengthy test or tribulation; the person then falls
into despair, quits, and surrenders to the Yetzer Hara before the
battle even started. But, if the same person would take heart and
tell himself that he certainly can beat the Yetzer Hara for one hour
or one day, then be could probably withstand and overcome a much
more severe test than the one at hand.
The Zohar mentions the principle of taking each hour and each
day at a time in the service of Hashem and says that if the Children
of Israel would have succeeded in delaying the unfortunate fiasco
of the golden calf for even a few minutes, then they would have
succeeded in avoiding it altogether. It says that Aaron should have
tried to delay the whole thing for even a few minutes by letting the
gold drop from his fingers or some other ploy. By delaying temptation
for a few minutes, one can totally avoid a transgression.
Norrnally, a test lasts only for a few minutes, especially when it
cornes to bodily drives and appetites. This is especially so in the
case of anger, for if one can succeed in maintaining focus for a few
seconds without losing one's temper, then the wave of anger passes
by like a fleeting cloud. The same thing goes for a temptation to
breach one's holiness; by delaying an unholy act for a few minutes,
one can easily maintain persona! holiness all the time.

Living the Moment

The same principle applies in all aspects of Divine service such as
praying with intent or leaming with diligence. It's hard to do either
for a lengthy period of time, but one can do both by concentrating
on the moment at band. When we tell ourselves that now we can
pray with proper intent, then the prayer doesn't seem like a heavy
weight on our shoulders. But, when we fail to concentrate on the
current moment, then our minds begin to wander from past to
future, sailing the four corners of the earth. When one looks at the
coming four-hour Talmud-study session, be might feel a heaviness
 There'sNoSadnessinthe World191

or laziness. But, by leaming eamestly for a minute at a time, the

hours fly by productively.
Pondering the difficulties of the past and the trepidations of the
future weaken and incapacitate a person. Such thoughts make
meeting the slightest challenges difficult. When a person fails to
deal with the current moment, he or she certainly can't perform a
necessary task with joy and success.
All the confusion and misdirection that people suffer from stems
from the fact that they don't live the moment at hand, and fail to
realize that there's nothing in the world that matters other than
the current moment. Why? The past is gone, the future is not yet
here, and the present transpires with the blink ofan eye. Who cares
what'll be in another minute? Why waste the present minute? Each
moment that we properly utilize accumulates to a life of success
and gratification.

Today Moshiach Will Come

The Midrash (Yalkut Shimoni, Psalms) tells a story of Rabbi
Yehoshua ben Levy meeting Eliahu HaNavi (Elija the Prophet).
Rabbi Yehoshua ben Levy asked, "When will Moshiach corne?"
Eliahu HaNavi answered, "Go ask him yourself," and showed him
where to find Moshiach.
Rabbi Yehoshua ben Levy approached Moshiach and asked, "When
does my lord plan to corne?"
Moshiach answered, "Today!"
The next day, when Rabbi Yehoshua ben Levy saw that Moshiach
had not yet arrived, he returned to Eliahu HaNavi complaining that
Moshiach had broken a promise to corne today, for he failed to corne.
Eliahu HaNavi answered that Moshiach's intent was that "today"
means "Today, if you heed His voice." For in truth, Moshiach is
ready to corne every single day, and the only delay is our failure to
serve Hashem minute by minute according the principle of "Today,
ifyou heed His voice," as we've just explained.
92 1 The Garden of Yearning

This is what the princess is telling the viceroy: "If you had only
corne on the prescribed day, you would have taken me out ofhere.
And because of one day, you lost." In other words, if you would
have done yom task minute by minute according the principle of
"Today, if you heed His voice," then your persona! savior would
have corne already. If the entire world would serve Hashem in
this manner, then Moshiach would certainly corne and we'd be
redeemed this ve1y minute.

�T ,
evert�eless, it is very difficult not to ea�,
�--;espec1ally on the last day, when the Evtl
Inclination is very overpowering. (ln other
words, the princess told him that now she
would make the conditions more lenient, that
from now he would not be expected to fast, for
that is a very hard condition to fulfill, etc.) ...

The above passage is an allusion to the principle that Rebbe

Nachman teaches us, narnely, that one should not fast other than
the prescribed public fasts that are mentioned in the Shulchan
Aruch. Former generations incorporated fasts and all types of
self-punishment in their self-purification efforts; Rebbe Nachman
stopped ail that, and taught us that an hour of persona! prayer in
seclusion can rectify more than ail the fasts and self-punishments
combined. One can attain lofty levels of spirituality by way of
persona! prayer. Rebbe Nachman even said about himselfthat had
he known in his younger years the true power of persona! prayer,
he wouldn't have broken his body with continued and lengthy fasts
like he did.

c:Ï!:'" o now, choose a place again, and dwell

,g-e there also a year, as before ...

The princess sends the viceroy on an additional year's prayer

mission. His lack ofsuccess indicates a lack ofprayer that must be
corrected before he can redeem the princess. Hashem's judgments
are absolute justice; if a person has not yet succeeded, it's a clear
 There'sN0SadnessintheWorld193

indication that he or she is not yet worthy of success. In the case

of the viceroy, his failure indicates that he deserves to fail, for he
has not yet attained the spiritual level of worthiness to rescue the
princess. But, if he now strengthens his prayers - both in quality
and in quantity - he shall certainly be worthy of future success.
We should all learn this lesson: Our delay in achieving what we
want to achieve is no mistaken judgment on Hashem's behalf;
it shows that we haven't prayed enough. Therefore, the key to
success is more prayer. As soon as we fulfill the prayer quota for
a certain request, we'll see with our own eyes how obstacles fall
by the wayside and we achieve what we have set out to achieve,
particularly if our goal is a spiritual one.
 Don't Be a Drunk 1 95

Chapter Eleven

Don't Be a Drunk

çf..(" nd on the last day you will be allowed to

�,"eat. Only you must not sleep, and must
not drink wine, so you won't fall asleep. For the
essential thing is not to sleep." So he went and
did accordingly ...

As we mentioned earlier, the princess eased the demands on the

viceroy and this time allowed him to eat. She wamed him, though,
to stay clear of intoxicating beverages that sink a person into
slumber, for the main thing is to stay awake. Rebbe Nachman
teaches in several places that intoxication confuses one's powers of
imagination and reduces a person to a state ofmaterial and spiritual
slumber.
Our holy Rebbe commanded us to steer clear of any intoxicating
beverages, including arak, whiskey, cognac, brandy, vodka,
liqueurs, beer, wine, ale, and everything else with an alcoholic
content except in the fulfillment of a mitzvah, such as drinking
wine on Purim or Passover, when we make extensive spiritual
preparation so that we can fulfill the mitzvah in complete holiness.
Drug use is also out ofthe question, for heavy-drug users lose their
human image.

Light Drugs
Particular dangerous are the so-called "light" drugs, which in certain
respects are more harmful than the life-threatening heavy drugs.
U sers oflight drugs think that they can still fonction normally, hold
a job, maintain a marriage and family, and the like. The truth is
that they destroy everything in their path including themselves. A
person in the self-destruct mode can't stand the slightest challenge,
stress, or pressure. He or she seeks a head-in-the-cloud existence
with no demands and no responsibility. Light-drug users lose their
96 1 The Garden of Yearning

inner strength and resolve, self-image, and motivational powers.

They ultimately !ose their jobs and their marriages, sowing seeds
of misery wherever they go, Heaven forbid.
Unfortunately, light drugs have become so widespread that
some people insist that their various substances help them attain
sensations of uplifting, inspiration, and other nonsense. Any drug­
induced sense of being uplifted or inspired is none other than the
alien fires of the Sitra Achra, or dark side of spirituality.

Alien Fire
We leam in Parshat Shemini (see Vayikra, chapter 10): "The sons
ofA aron, Nadav and Avihu, each took his fire pan and they put fire
in them and placed incense on it [the fire - LB], and they brought
before Hashern an alien fire that He had not commanded them. A
fire came forth from Hashem and consumed them, and they <lied in
front of Hashem."
Our sages examine the sin of Nadav and Avihu, and write that
Nadav and Avihu wanted to serve Hashem under the influence of
alcohol. They certainly weren't drunkards; on the contrary, they
were tzaddikim of the highest level. Their mistake was that they
believed they could attain even higher spiritual heights by way of
substance usage.
Hashem doesn't want "spiritual heights" that result from the alien fire
ofoutside substances like wine, liquor, and drugs ofall sorts. These
are the alien fires that Hashem doesn't want. Hashem wants our
spiritual gain that results from yeaming, dedication, perseverance,
and bard work. With proper effort, we merit a fire from Heaven that
kindles in our hearts in the holy love and enthusiasm for Divine
service. Such a fire is complete holiness, free of any impurity or
alien influence.

No to Tobacco
Even cigarettes are light drugs, for nicotine is a habit-forming
substance. Smokers have the illusion that smoking cairns them
 Don't Be a Drunk 1 97

and helps them to think. Spiritually and physiologically, nothing

could be further from the truth. Smoking seriously constricts blood
vessels, and hampers the flow of blood to the brain and heait that
is so necessary for a cairn and a clear mind. Smoking destroys the
heart and the lungs and endangers a person's health. Hashem has
no gratification from a person smoking.
Cigarettes, like other light drugs, enslave people, consuming both
their money and their health. Rebbe Nachman forbade tobacco
consumption on behalf of his disciples. He said that it's not befitting
for a servant ofHashem to smoke. He asked rhetorically, "Don't we
have enough bodily urges without adding tobacco?"
The thought of a servant of Hashem that requires inhalation and
exhalation of smoke to attain vitality is disparaging. lt's also a
defamation of Hashem's Name and a gross insult to Torah and
mitzvot, as if to say that Torah and mitzvot are not enough to
satisfy a person, Heaven forbid. Also, the smoker violates the
commandment to protect and preserve his own health. Even worse,
researchers have proven that smokers endanger others, forcing
them to inhale secondary smoke. What gives them the right to
cause damage to other people, oftentimes to their own spouses and
children?
Even if a person doesn't see himself as a servant ofHashem, anyone
with the slightest common sense realizes that smoking holds no
benefits, only damage. Any smoker should take an honest look at
himself and say no to tobacco. Suffering a few days of nicotine
withdrawal is far preferable to a life of suffering and enslavement
to tobacco.

çir""'\n
,Q ,,
the last day, he would go there, and saw
�·a spring flowing, with a reddish hue and
a wine-scented fragrance. He asked the servant,
"Did you see that spring, which should have
water in it, but its color is red, and its scent is
of wine?" And he went and sipped from the
spring. And he immediately fell into a sleep
that lasted several years - seventy, to be exact...
98 The Garden of Yearning
1

The Yetzer Hara is a crafty fox; when he sees that a person is

pursuing the path of holiness and avoiding even the slightest of
transgressions, he gives that persan an enticing or tempting thought
of something extraordinary, calling him or ber to corne closer and
have a look. Once the unsuspecting individual draws closer, he or
she falls into the Yetzer's trap.
Rebbe Nachman wams (see Sefer HaMidot, Adultery, 10): Don't
negotiate with a temptation, for the lingering thought of a temptation
- even refuting it - arouses the desire for that temptation.
Again, we see that the viceroy has not yet attained the level of
emuna. What's he looking at the spring for? What does he carc
if water or wine flows in the spring? Indeed, even if it is wine,
the princess commanded not to drink wine, so why think twice? It
tums out that the viceroy's main mistake was his failure to compose
himself and clarify the truth in bis mind. Without a strong stance
on the trnth, he fell.
The viceroy's second fall is much more serious than bis first, for
this fall led to a seventy-year slumber. Interestingly, the Hebrew
gematria, or numerical value for wine, yayin, is seventy! Wine
and light drugs are enough to sever a person completely from the
seventy faces of Torah.
Also, alcohol and drug addiction - functional addiction included
- occupies the addicted persan 24 hours a day, not leaving a single
minute for self composure and introspection.
Drinkers and 'light' drug-users fail to fonction properly for several
reasons: Since their acts are against the law and unacceptable in
greater society, they must hide what they do. Also, since their
actions aren't acceptable in wholesome circles, users befriend
fringe elements of society that act like they do, and are even
more negatively influenced by them. In a nasty downward spiral,
their incarnes suffer, their families suffer, and they walk a path of
eventual self-destrnction.
 Don't Be a Drunk 1 99

From Above
More than once, the viceroy almost rescued the princess. He
reached the gate of salvation, and fel!. Each time, he fell at the very
last minute. His failure cornes frorn above, for Rebbe Nachman
writes (Likutei Moharan l: 261 ): "When a person falls from his
spiritual level, he should know that the fall cornes from above." In
other words, the iack of success in passing a test means a Jack of
assistance from above. Without Hashem's help, a person falls.
No one is capable of withstanding any trial or tribulation
without help from above. Our sages teach that a person's Evil
Inclination overcomes him every day, and without Hashem's help,
the person would be subdued. When a person rnakes what he thinks
to be his best effort to get close to Hashem, to make teshuva, and
to overcome bis bodily appetites and bad habits - yet he still falls
from time to time - he should know that he's not being helped from
above, for his own good.
Why didn't Hashem give a helping hand to the viceroy as he fell
once more on his way to rescuing the princess? Why doesn't
Hashem help us once and for ail to overcome the Yetzer Hara and
to rescue our own princess?
The main reason is that we are not yet ready to redeem our
personal princess. If Hashem would give us unlimited success
at this time, instantly, with no setbacks or delays, we'd probably
become arrogant. Instant success gives a person the illusion that
he's a tzaddik, or deserving, or Heaven's gift to mankind - he
may even begin believing that he's the Moshiach! Instant success
destroys yearning, for one who succeeds eff01ilessly doesn't have
to pray and yeam to succeed. Instant success is liable to sink a
person into spiritual slumber, thinking that he's already reached the
pinnacle of righteousness. One who's smugly happy with himself
doesn't strive for more.
Clearly, Hashem doesn't want us to fall into these kinds of traps.
He wants to give us the gift of real success, not artificial silver­
plated success. Artificial and instant success would be spiritually
dangerous for us, for we might sleep or flounder at a low spiritual
100 The Garden of Yearning
1

level thinking that we've already reached the peak of Mount Sinai.
It tums out that all the obstacles and delays along our spiritual way
are all for the best, to strengthen us until we reach the level where
we really are worthy.
A person must wait patiently until he sees the fruit of his labors.
Our sages say that one who wants to be purified is told to wait.
W hat does a person do during the waiting period? Sleep? Eat ice­
cream? No! He works hard at prayer! He leams Torah! He perfects
his character! He yeams for Hashem and seeks His proximity!
One must therefore be strong and not discouraged no matter what
happens to him - falls, setbacks, trials, tribulations, difficulties
- anything! Life on this lowly earth is one continuous battle, and
there's no choice but to fight. We must cling to our desires, yeam
for Hashem, and try our very best to realize our dreams by praying
constantly until we're really worthy of getting close to Hashem.
We should always remember that our successes are from Hashem,
and not credit ourselves for anything. That way, our hearts remain
free of arrogance and we avoid spiritual slumber. One who desires
more and more spirituality is one who really lives.
As soon as Hashem sees that a person is worthy, He sends help
from above in completing the mission of rescuing the princess, as
we see at the end of our tale.

The Sifting Process

A person cornes to this world to perform a task. He's required to
visit all the places where he stumbled in former reincamations,
and to meet those individuals with whom he must "sift" out a soul
correction. He must withstand trials and tribulations that will help
him attain his persona! tikkun, or soul correction, thus contributing
to the tikkun of the entire world. He won't be able to redeem his
princess until he's completed all the other tasks on the way.
Sifting our own good from the evil within us, thus correcting
ourselves and attaining our person geula, or redemption, is an
integral part of the general geula of the entire world. As such, Rebbe
 Don't Be a Drunk 1101

Nachman teaches (see Likutei Moharan I:5), that everyone should

say: "The world was created just for me, therefore l'm responsible
for the world, so I must attend to its needs and pray for it."
Sometimes a person is actually on the level ofworthiness, but his
persona! tikkun is delayed because the world isn't yet ready. In that
case, such a person should pray for the correction ofthe world, for
the world's correction and his persona! con-ection are intertwined.
One would be best advised to pray daily for the success of the
Jewish people, for Jewish outreach, for the spread of Torah and
teshuva in the world, and certainly for the redemption ofthe Jewish
people, the ingathering ofthe exiles, and the rebuilding ofour Holy
Temple in Jernsalem. Praying for personal needs is not enough,
especially when the world at large needs so much prayer and Divine
mercy. Once again, the more a person contributes to the general
redemption, the more he'll hasten his personal redemption.
If a person ignores the world's needs, and fails to pray for the
general redemption and for the Jewish people as a whole, then he'll
be hampered from above again and again; such an individual won't
be allowed to complete his persona! mission in rescuing his own
princess.
Rebbe Nathan ofBreslov said: "My Moshiach has corne already!"
In other words, Rebbe Nathan achieved his persona! redemption,
for he devoted his entire adult life to the general tikkun ofthe Jewish
people with a level ofself-sacrifice, dedication, perseverance and
suffering that no words can describe. In his final days he wept that
he didn't devote even more time to disseminating Rebbe Nachman's
teachings in the world and writing more books based on Rebbe
Nachman's wisdom, which certainly would have been ofpriceless
benefit for the Jewish people.

I Fell, but I Got Up

We must ail know one thing: Every setback in life- even a setback
that results from our own mistake - cornes from above!
Therefore, one should never torture oneself. There's no room to
102 The Garden of Yearning
1

blame oneself or anybody else for troubles in life, and certainly not
to fall into despair and depression. The important thing is desire;
falling means nothing, as long as a persan maintains a desire to
do better. Never abandon your desires, for Hashem looks first and
foremost at our desires. The best way to counter a fall or failure is
to declare a new beginning and get back up on our feet as fast as
possible. We desire to do better! The fall means nothing if we get
back on our feet swiftly and with new resolve.
After a failure, a person is being tested; will he fall into despair and
depression? Will he make a better second effort? How fast will he
be back on his feet? When we utilize our fall to get up fast and to
make a better second effort, then we tum a failure into a smashing
success. That way, each of us is assured of achieving his or her
complete persona! tikkun.

Tremendous Reinforcement
Even more importantly, a persan that falls yet gets up quickly gives
much more gratification to Hashem than a person that never fell
in the first place. Hashem wants our desire more than anything,
and the biggest expression of desire is the manner that we pick
ourselves up after a setback. OK, so we did something wrong?
We did something that Hashem told us not to do? Let's not fret!
From this moment on, let's decide that we're going to be better. We
can return to Hashem with greater desire and greater yearning. We
can overcome our faults and our bodily drives. Oftentimes the fall
simply fuels our desire - that in itself is a triumph!
The entire teshuva process depends on the desire to do better,
especially after a setback. People that have bounced back from
setbacks attain a much higher spiritual level than those that
have never suffered setbacks. So many people fail to realize
the gratification that Hashem receives when a person makes a
tremendous effort in reinforcing himself after a fall. Those who get
stuck in self-pity, despair, depression, and disappointment never
make proper teshuva. Sadness cannot be a vessel for holiness.
The Yetzer Hara is a liar. He tries to tell a person that he or she is
 Don't Be a Drunk 1103

doomed after a fall. Hopelessness disarms a person. But, a new

start and a new resolve disarm the Yetzer Hara.
Knowing that our fall cornes from above saves us from a low self
image, feelings of guilt, and from self-persecution. The worry and
anxiety of despair destroy a person's mental, physical, and spiritual
health. Reinforcing ourselves after a setback and starting anew
save us untold mental, physical, and spiritual wear and tear. The
important thing is to get back on our feet as fast as possible.
Before we fall, we do everything in our power so that we don't
fall. But, once we've fallen, it's a sign that Hashem wants us to
strengthen ourselves. When we do, we've lost nothing and have
gained everything - a tremendous new spiritual reinforcement!
Each fall is really a chance to attain new heights. The more we
reinforce ourselves, the more we've taken advantage of a fall or
setback as a growth tool.
Breslover tradition, handed down from teacher to pupil for the
last two hundred years, teaches that in the future - after the sin
of Adam is rectified - the world will be far more beautiful than it
would have been had Adam never sinned. The same goes for the
individual: the person that fearlessly recovers from a fall develops
a depth of enhanced inner strength that those who have never fallen
don't usually attain.

To Be a "Kosher" Person
Rebbe Nachman once said (see Chayei Moharan, 453): "Just as
you see me, I mean to say, you all regard me as a complete tzaddik,
even so, if Heaven forbid I were to commit the greatest sin in the
world, even so, I wouldn't let the sin throw me off track, I'd just
continue to be a kosher person after the sin as before the sin, only
afterwards, I'd make teshuva!"
Apparently, Rebbe Nachman's saying is strange. How can a
complete tzaddik like Rebbe Nachman say that after the sin he
wouldn't be thrown offtrack, and that he'd continue to be a tzaddik
as before the sin? Rebbe Nachman knew that if he would fall, he'd
1041 The Garden of Yearning

quickly climb to bis feet with a new and buming desire to do better.
As we leamed in the beginning of this book, as soon as a person
merely desires to do better, he's considered a complete tzaddik! So
we see, that even after a nasty fall, a person can be a tzaddik as long
as he or she maintains a strong desire to be better and to get closer
to Hashem. All he or she has to do is to be happy and to make
teshuva for whatever they did wrong.
Rebbe Nachman was also teaching his disciples the principle that
we've been discussing in this chapter, namely, that a person after
a fall can rise much higher than a person that never fell. Hashem
loves strong comebacks. Teshuva depends on strong comebacks.
Each of us should decide that we'll always be "kosher" people, by
constantly yearning for the proximity of Hashem. As long as we
never give up our desires, we're assured a rosy future. Even if we
slip up from time to time, we can make sameday or on-the-spot
teshuva for whatever we did wrong. The important thing is to keep
smiling and to keep trying.
We should internalize - deep in our hearts - a buming desire to get
close to Hashem, like an etemal flame that can't be extinguished
by the icy waters of a setback. Such a desire grants unfathomable
gratification to Hashem. With the will to start anew and to rise
quickly after a fall, a person will be stronger than if he or she had
never fallen. This is the path of teshuva - a new and courageous
start of getting to our feet speedily after a fall. Those who walk this
path will surely redeem their own personal princess.

f�' nd great numbers of soldiers passed with

�;their accompanied gear. The servant hid
himself from the soldiers.

When a person falls into a state of spiritual slumber, until he

awakens, he experiences all kinds difficulties, ups and downs,
confusion, and the like. Rebbe Nathan wrote (Rebbe Nachman's
Tales, Introduction): "During the time of spiritual slumber, Heaven
forbid, a person suffers what he suffers, and that's the allusion of
the great number of soldiers passing by while the viceroy was
 Don't Be a Drunk 1105

sleeping. 'Their accompanied gear' are all the tribulations that

corne along with a period of suffering."

. fterwards
fft came a covered carriage, and in
0
00

�,"it sat the princess. She stopped next to

him. She descended and sat by him, recognizing
who he was. She shook him strongly, but he
failed to wake up. And she started to bemoan,
"How many immense efforts and travails he
has undergone, these many years, in order to
free me, and because of one day that he could
have freed me, and lost it...," and she cried a
great deal about this, saying "There is great pity
for him and for me, that I am here so very long,
and cannot leave ... "

This segment alludes to the fact that the Shechinah, the holy Divine
Presence, is constantly trying to awaken people from their spiritual
slumber. When a person fails to wake up, the Shechinah suffers
indescribable anguish, for she has infinite compassion for every
person, especially for the Jewish soul that's not aware of its own
holiness and lofty spiritual status and continues to flounder in a
spiritual exile. Such a soul sleeps its life away, wasting time on
television, movies, inconsequential pastimes, and outright idleness.
The sleeping soul forgets completely about its own Creator and
the myriad of favors and miracles the Creator does for it every
minute of the day. With emuna in exile, the soul slumbers, and the
Shechinah wails.

J'Â' fter that, she took her scarf off of her

�,'head, and wrote upon it with her tears,
and laid it by him. And she rose and boarded
her carriage, and rode away ...

The scarf with the tears written on it is the teachings of the tzaddik,
which are written in his tears. The words of the true tzaddik are
like burning coals dipped in the tears of sorrow, for the true tzaddik
106 1 The Garden of Yearning

feels the holy Shechinah's sorrow and the sorrow of the Jewish
souls in exile. Before writing any Torah nuance or before lecturing,
the tzaddik cries to Hashem begging for the right words that will
stimulate readers and listeners to return to Hashem. The tzaddik
has no other motive than bringing people closer to Hashem and
spreading emuna and Hashem's glory in the world. Therefore,
the words that flow forth from a heart that burns with the love of
Hashem have the power to warm the hearts of those who read or
listen to them.
 The Mountain of Gold 1 107

Chapter Twelve

The Mountain of Gold

fj\' fterwards, he awoke, and asked the

�'.,'servant, "Where am I in the world?" So he
told him the whole story - that many soldiers
had passed there, and that there had been a
carriage, and a woman who wept over him and
cried out that there is great pity on him and on
her. In the midst of this, he looked around and
saw that there was a scarf lying next to him. So
he asked, "Where did this corne from?" The
servant explained that she had written upon it
with her tears. So he took it and held it up
against the sun, and began to see the letters,
and he read all that was written there - ail her
mourning and crying as previously mentioned,
and that she is no longer in the said castle, and
that he should look for a mountain of gold and
a castle of pearls, "There you shall find me ... "

The princess inforrns the viceroy that she's no longer in the first
castle and that he must now search for a mountain of gold and a
castle of pearls - there he'll find ber. The rnountain of gold and
castle of pearls metaphorically indicate our current exile - the
exile of lust for money. Today, the Shechinah and ernuna have
falkn to an abyss in the lowest depths of the kelipot, the darkness
of evil and impurity. This is what's known as the fiftieth gate, or
lowest level of spiritual impurity, since the lust for money includes
and encompasses every form of idolatry. Indeed, there is no idol
worship more spiritually devastating than the lust for money.
Rebbe Nachman's imagery of the mountain of gold and the castle
of pearls represents "ldollartry" - the worst form of idolatry.
No generation in history has been so driven by the demon ofmoney
chasing as this generation. Few are those who don't suffer from the
108 1 The Garden of Yearning

Just for money. In Rebbe Nachman's "Tale of the Master of Prayer",

the master of prayer says that the lust for money is the worst of ail,
for it's almost impossible to uproot, as explained there.
Why is the lust for money so severe? AU other lusts and bodily
appetites such as the craze for eating or the preoccupation with sex
are also damaging, and require massive effort to break free from
them. But, there are times when a person doesn't think about them.
For example, one who lusts for food doesn't think about food after
a heavy rneal. At that time, it's possible to discuss other things with
him, such as faith and teshuva. Even those that succumb to a lust
for sex don't think about their carnal drives 100% of the time.
But, when a person suffers from a lust for money, his mind is
locked on money 24 hours a day. The moment he opens his eyes, he
thinks about money, how to make money, how to accumulate more
money, and so forth. Ali day long, he focuses on money. At night,
he twists from side to side in bed thinking about money, dreaming
new schemes of obtaining more money the next day. Such a person
doesn't have a free moment to listen to anything about Hashem, the
soul's needs, or spirituality.
When someone tries to speak to the money chaser about the ultimate
purpose of life, the words fall on deaf ears and a he1metically­
sealed heart. At best, the money chaser will listen politely for a few
moments and nod his head. But, nothing will penetrate; the money
chaser will think, "Hey, time is money? Why waste time on silly
philosophical discussions when I can be making more money?!"

The Truly Rich Man

We therefore see that the mountain of gold and castle of pearls is
the tikkun of this generation. In other words, our task is to break
free from the chains of monetary Just. We do this by developing our
trnst in Hashem, by minimizing our material needs, and by being
satisfied with what we have to the point that we feel like we live on
a mountain of gold and in a castle of pearls that lack nothing, and
contain ail the riches in the world.
 The Mountain of Gold 1 109

As long as we Jack the emuna, trust, and happiness that impart the
feeling that we live on a mountain of gold and in a castle of pearls
that Jack nothing, we won't be able to rescue the princess. Rebbe
Nachman teaches that obtaining genuine emuna is impossible
without shattering one's Just for money (see Likutei Moharan
1:13).

çtt:i..' o he left the servant behind, and went to

Wlook for her alone ...

Here, the viceroy climbs another rnng up the spiritual ladder. He

leaves his servant behind - in other words, his basic animal soul
- and proceeds to search for the princess. Here, we learn that
the viceroy has cleansed himself of all animal drives and bodily
appetites to the point where he is no longer concerned with his
basic animal soul. The viceroy has uplifted his material aspirations
to the loftier level of spiritual aspirations, yearning for emuna and
the redemption from spiritual exile.
From this point on, the viceroy's search takes on a new dimension.
As soon he turns his back on the mundane and material, shedding
the drives of the flesh, his search becomes steadfast, perseverant,
dedicated and focused. Nothing stands in his way as he courageously
overcomes all obstacles. Even obstacles that corne from formidable
individuals fail to confuse or disorient him. He continues on his
way until he finds the princess.

d§.\0 nd he went for several years searching,

�:and he composed himself, thinking that
certainly a mountain of gold and a castle of
pearls would not be found in a settled area, for
he was an expert in the map of the world. So he
went to the deserts. And he searched for her
there man y years ...

Time and again we see how the different stages in the search for the
princess require years of hard work. From here we leam that the
search for emuna is a step-by-step process that requires patience,
1] 0 1 The Garden of Yearning

commitment, and perseverance. ln spirituality, there are no instant

results. Moving up the ladder of Divine service is a slow and
lengthy process. We also see how in each new stage, the viceroy
"composes himself" in persona! prayer. ..

fj\' fterwards, he saw a giant man, far beyond

�ithe normal human proportions. He was
carrying a massive tree, the size of which is not
found in settled areas. The man asked him,
"Who are you?" He answered, "1 am a man." The
giant was amazed, and exclaimed, "I have been
in the desert such a long time, and I have never
seen a man here." So he told him the whole
story, and that he was searching for a mountain
of gold and a castle of pearls. The giant answered
him, "Certainly, it does not exist at all." And he
discouraged him and said that they had muddled
his mind with nonsense, for it surely does not
exist. So he (the viceroy) started to cry bitterly,
for he felt certain that it must exist somewhere.
And this giant discouraged him, saying that
certainly he had been told nonsense. Yet he (the
viceroy) still said that it must exist...

The viceroy has now reached a spiritual level where he no longer

has obstacles from his own bodily drives. He now faces obstacles
in the form of outsiders, not even regular people but individuals
of enormous proportions, which alludes to great tzaddikim. As it
is hinted here, the viceroy meets a giant carrying a massive tree;
this is an allusion to a tremendous Torah scholar, for the Torah is
described metaphorically as a "tree of life," (see Proverbs, ch. 3).
Our holy Rebbe Nachman is teaching us that people are the
greatest obstacles in our journey to truth. Here, the viceroy hasn't
encountered some simple person, but a "giant", a tzaddik and a
scholar of magnificent proportions, who is capable of ruling
over the animais, the birds, and even the winds, as we see in the
continuation of our tale.
 The Mountain of Gold 1 111

These tremendous individuals are telling the viceroy that he's living
a mistake! They say there's no such thing as a mountain of gold and
a castle of pearls ! In essence, they are telling him, "Listen, friend
� we have attained lofty spiritual levels. We're telling you that
you can't live a supernatural existence of total reliance on Divine
Providence without making some kind of effort." The mountain of
gold alludes to perfect trust inHashem, a level ofcomplete freedom
from monetary lust. At this level, one need not lift a finger to make
a living. The greater the emuna, the more one's subsistence arrives
automatically at one's front doorstep.
The viceroy withstands this test successfully, refusing to listen to
the giant and clinging to simple emuna. He lives his simple faith
thatHashem cares for the needs of every creature with compassion,
above the level of nature and logic. The viceroy doesn't even need
spiritual effort to make a living, for a person with perfect trust in
Hashem receives his livelihood without even having to pray.

A Place in the World to Come

The principle test of a person's emuna is in the area of income
and making a living. Our sages teach that whoever says Psalm 145
three times a day merits a place in the World to Come, for Psalm
145 reminds us ofHashem's Divine Providence, which sees to our
needs every day and every hour, just as we need something. The
obstacle that prevents most people from serving Hashem is the
confusion about making a living. Only a person who believes that
Hashem can sustain him with minimal effort on his own pait can
serveHashem properly.
Now, the viceroy enjoys the strength of conviction that results from
years of prayer and yearning for emuna.He has done exactly what
the princess has told him to. No one can make him budge from his
simple emuna, from the knowledge that there is no one or nothing
other thanHashem, that His glory is everywhere, that everything is
for the best, and that everything is conducted byHim in magnificent
perfection. With this engraved on his mind and heart, there is no
need for worry, stress, pressure, or anxiety. The main thing is to
live emuna, prayer, happiness, and innocence.
112 1 The Garden of Yearning

Fear No One but Hashem

Dear reader, stop and think for a moment: Imagine how amazed and
awed you'd be if you saw a magnificent individual that knows the
entire Torah and all its secrets by heart, a miracle worker of sublime
spiritual stature who contrais the forces of nature. Now, imagine
that he snaps his fingers, and thereby summons all the animais, the
birds, and the winds whenever he desires! Then, how would you
react if you saw him conversing with the animais? Imagine how
impressed you'd be! Now, this same magnificent individual tells
you that you are fooling yourself and that there's no way to live a
life of simple emuna with no effort at all. Wouldn't you listen to
him? How could you argue with someone so awesome?
Here, we must stress that true, pure, and simple emuna is so
concealed that few obtain it. The giants capable of carrying the
"big tree" on their shoulders - impressive rabbis, scholars of Torah,
even miracle workers - although we must respect them, if they
can't guide us on the sweet path of simple emuna, then they can't
be our spiritual guides. We shouldn't let such "giants" scare us
and deter us from the path of the true tzaddik that leads us to true
emuna. Fear no one but Hashem.
Few people sincerely believe in the power of prayer and of emuna.
Often, when they meet a person who eamestly and innocently
yeams to cling to Hashem with pure and complete emuna, and lead
a life of prayer and teshuva, they chi de him and ridicule his emuna.
"Hitbodedut? Who do you think you are, the Baal Shem Tov? Who
needs it? The important thing is to leam Torah and make a living.
Get those weird ideas out of your head! That's not for you! You
can't cling to Hashem with pure emuna - that's impossible!"

Retired Chassidim
Our holy Rebbe Nachman said that there are those that set out to
serve Hashem, but later became discouraged. When these people
see others who truly yearn to serve Hashem with earnest, praying
at length and with enthusiasm, they make fun of them and try
to weaken them. These "retired Chassidim" who have fallen by
 The Mountain of Gold 1 113

the spiritual wayside can't stand to see others striving to serve

Hashem.

Tenacity
The viceroy clings to emuna and cries bitterly when he hears the
heresy that questions the truth. He's tenacious and firm in his belief
that there's a path to simple emuna that's open to everyone on every
spiritual level.
As soon as a person desires to live by the advice and guidance of
the true tzaddik, he arouses a mountain of resistance from within
and from without. One must be tenacious, clinging to bis faith in
the true tzaddik with no reservations. If the tzaddik says we can
reach the level of simple and pure emuna, it must be true! We
must therefore fulfill the directives of the tzaddik in their entirety,
just as Rebbe Nathan so meticulously followed everything Rebbe
Nachman said with complete dedication, no matter how much
other people - both family and strangers - hampered him. Even
the opposition ofRebbe Nathan's father-in-law, one of the greatest
rabbinical authorities of bis generation, couldn't deter him from
implementing every iota of Rebbe Nachman's advice. After every
lesson that Rebbe Nathan heard from Rebbe Nachman, he'd run
to the forest and pray all night long that he'd be able to intemalize
and implement everything that he had learned. For that reason, be
achieved what other disciples ofRebbe Nachman did not.
We see that once the viceroy was tenacious and steadfast in bis
convictions, then even the giant became submissive and helped
him. Once again, we see the principle that if a persan is strong and
believes in what he's doing, then the hindrances become assisting
agents. With true and strong emuna, one's parents, spouse, and
even great rabbis will fall at his feet and corne to his aid.
 One Obstacle after Another 1115

Chapter Thirteen

One Obstacle after Another

ç_é' o the giant said to him, "1 think it is

�, nonsense. But since you persist, I am in
charge of the animais. I will do this for you: I
will call them all. For they traverse the whole
world, perhaps one of them will know where
the mountain and the castle are." And he called
them all, from the smallest to the Iargest, all the
varieties of animais, and asked them. And all
of them answered that they had not seen these
things. So he said, "You see that they told you
nonsense. If you want my advice, turn back,
because you certainly will not find it, for it does
not exist..."

Although the viceroy has overcorne the obstacle of the giant, he's
now faced with another formidable obstacle, since the animais
have circurnvented the globe and now report that they've seen
no rnountain of gold and castle of pearls. But, once again, the
viceroy is neither deterred nor confused; with clarity of thought,
he rernains comrnitted to his firrn convictions. As such, even the
obstacle becornes a source of assistance, for the giant decides to
help the viceroy in his search for the princess.

,f,.(' nd he pleaded passionately with him,

�,'saying, "But it absolutely must exist!"
So the giant said to him, "Behold, in this
desert also lives my brother, and he is in
charge of the birds. Perhaps they know, since
they fly at great heights - perhaps they saw
this mountain and castle. Go to him and tell
him that I sent you to him." So he searched
for him for several years ...
116 The Garden of Yearning
1

The viceroy continues on his way, but this time, he makes a

mistake: Instead of searching for the princess, he is searching for
the giant's brother. Such a mistake can be tragic; once a person
develops a connection to a true tzaddik, he or she shouldn't seek
advice from others. The giant already tried to discourage the viceroy
from continuing the search altogether. By a miracle, the viceroy
summoned the inner strength and self composure to do what he
knew was right, despite the apparent proof and arguments to the
contrary. If the giant almost succeeded in convincing the viceroy
to abort the search, then why is the viceroy now searching for the
giant's brother? Who's to say whether he'll be able to withstand
another test of faith?
Therefore, one should never accept advice from or depend on those
who don't lead him on the path ofthe true tzaddik. Rebbe Nachman
explains that only the true tzaddik can give complete and proper
advice (see Likutei Moharan 1:7): "lt's impossible to arrive at truth
without getting close to tzaddikim and walking in the path oftheir
advice. The advice one receives from thern is spiritually tantamount
to a marital bond. How does advice resernble the marital bond?
Advice cornes from the kidneys (see Gemara, tracta te Shabbat 61 ),
and the kidneys are also vessels of the seed and tools of giving
birth. As such, when a person receives advice from someone, it's
like receiving the seed of that person, whether he is righteous or
wicked. The advice ofthe tzaddik is totally the seed of truth ... "

/A' nd again he found a very large man, as

�,'before. He was also carrying a massive
tree, as before. And this giant also asked him as
had the first. And he told him the whole story,
and that his brother had sent him to him. This
giant also discouraged him, saying that it
certainly did not exist. And he pleaded with
him as with the first. Then the giant said to
him, "Behold, I am in charge of the birds; I will
call them, perhaps they know." So he called all
the birds, and asked them all, from the smallest
to the largest, and they answered that they did
 One Obstacle after Another 1117

not know anything about this mountain and

castle. So the giant said to him, "You see, it
certainly does not exist. If you want my advice,
turn back, for it simply does not exist." But he
pleaded with him, saying "It certainly exists ..."

The events of the viceroy's encounter with the first giant now repeat
themselves in the encounter with the giant's brother. The latter,
willfully or not, also tries to discourage the viceroy from continuing
the innocent search for the princess, or true and complete emuna.
This is what happens when a person seeks advice from others,
rather than depending on the advice of the tzaddik with simple and
pure faith.
Fortunately, the viceroy's selfcomposure and strength ofconviction
corne to his aid. He knows what he has to do and he knows that
the princess's instructions are absolute truth. If she said to search
for a mountain of gold and castle of pearls, then there's no doubt
whatsoever that they exist! This strength of conviction gives the
viceroy power to continue and to stand on what he knows is right,
and once again, the obstacle becomes an aid. Everything takes a turn
for the best. Then, as another test offaith, things turn for the worst,
for the birds know nothing about a mountain of gold and castle of
pearls. Once again, the viceroy doesn't budge from his stance of
truth - he shatters the obstacle and the giant's brother now becomes
a source ofassistance, and sends the viceroy to a third brother. This
time, the viceroy focuses on his search for the princess, and not on
his search for outside help; as such, he succeeds!

� he second giant said to him, "Further

�-'i-, ahead in the desert lives my brother, who
is in charge of the winds, and they run around
the whole world. Perhaps they know." So he
went several more years searching, and found
also this giant, who was also carrying a giant
tree. And the giant asked him, as the others
had. And he told him the whole story, as before.
And the giant discouraged him, as before. And
118 The Garden of Yearning
1

he pleaded with him as well. So the third giant

said to him, that for his sake he would call all
the winds and ask them. He called them, and
all the winds came, and he asked them all, and
not one of them knew about the mountain and
the castle. So the giant said to him, "You see,
they told you nonsense." And the viceroy began
to cry bitterly, and said, "1 know that it certainly
exists ... "

This is the first tirne that the viceroy says the words, "1 know
that it certainly exists." His ernuna, in attaining the level of firrn
knowledge, marks the beginning of the geula, or the redemption
ofemuna.

çf,,(' s they were speaking, one more wind

�.,"came. And the giant in charge of them
was annoyed with him, saying, "Why did you
not corne with the rest?" He answered, "1 was
delayed, for I needed to carry a princess to a
mountain of gold and a castle of pearls." And
the viceroy was overjoyed ...

Why did the last wind wait until now to carry the princess to the
rnountain ofgold and castle ofpearls? Severa] years have transpired
since she told the viceroy that she'd be there. Where was she ail
these years? We see that only after the viceroy attained the level
of firm and complete emuna - having withstood countless trials,
tribulations, difficulties, and setbacks - only then did the princess
arrive at the place from where he could rescue her, the mountain
of gold and castle of pearls. The redemption of emuna depends
solely on our efforts in this lowly physical world. One's persona!
geula depends on one's dedicated hard work, which takes emuna
out from exile and hastens the geula of the entire world.

çr§r he one in charge asked the wind, "What is

�;f-,'expensive there? (In other words, what
 One Obstacle after Another 1119

things are considered valuable and important

there?)" He answered him, "Everything there is
extremely expensive... "

As we leamed earlier, the mountain of gold and the castle of pearls

allude to monetary lust. Where there's monetary lust, emuna is
in exile. The viceroy must journey to this place of monetary lust
in order to rescue and redeem the princess. Since the princess is
captive in a place of monetary lust, then the question that the giant
in charge asks is quite understandable: "What is expensive there?"
He receives the answer that everything is expensive there. Surely,
wherever there's monetary lust, everything is very expensive,
for people there crave making more and more money. Another
interpretation is that in a place where there's emuna, everything is
precious (the Hebrew wordfàr expensive and precious is identical,
•:vakar").

�, o the one in charge of the winds said to

�" the viceroy, "Seeing that you have been
searching for her such a long time, and you
went through many difficulties. Perhaps now
you will be hindered by expenses. Therefore
I am giving you this vessel. Every time you
reach into it, you will receive money from
it ... "

Here we see how the third giant - who was an obstacle at first
- does an about-face to the extent that he offers to remove further
obstacles from the viceroy's path. ln other words, not only has he
stopped trying to discourage the viceroy, but now he's willing to
help. He offers to cover ail the viceroy's expenses and assure that
there won't be additional obstacles in the viceroy's path.
Here, we learn a remarkable lesson in life ofjust how powerful the
yearning, desire, and tenacity for holiness are. Nothing compares
with walking steadfast in the path of pure, innocent, and simple
emuna. When a person clings to the path of innocent faith with
strength, even the greatest barriers become agents of assistance;
120 1 The Garden of Yearning

not only that, but they protect the faithful from further obstacles.
The viceroy receives a vesse! in which he merely inserts his hand,
and withdraws whatever money he needs. The vessel is symbolic
of the level of bitachon, or complete trust in Hashem. The viceroy
worked and strived for this level, having shattered any lust for money
while acquiring emuna and perfect trust that Hashem alone sustains
and feeds every creature on earth. Now, he has the complete trust
that Hashem will give him whatever he needs for Divine service, no
matter what the sum. He doesn't have the slightest doubt that he'll get
whatever he needs whenever he needs it.
Our holy Rebbe Nachman teaches (Likutei Moharan, 1:60), that
there's a level of observation in Torah that requires a high level
of opulence. Tn other words, that one who attains such a level
must have unlimited funds. Therefore, the worthy person of this
particular spiritual level is granted unlimited riches from above.
Any needs that a person requires for his service of Hashem are
fulfilled. This is the opulence of holiness, which means that a
person receives ail the money in the world if he needs it for his
learning and understanding of Torah. The viceroy attained this
level by virtue ofhis dedicated hard work, receiving this particular
vesse! to enable him to rescue the princess with ease.

,/A' nd he commanded the aforementioned

�:wind to take him there. The storm wind
came, and carried him there ...

According to Jewish esoteric thought, the "storm wind" is one

of the three kelipot, or strong spirits of impurity. Once again, we
witness the fact that when a person stubbornly walks the path of
righteousness and truth, even the Sitra Achra helps him redeem
emuna.

... and brought him to the gate. There were

guards posted there, that would not let him
enter the city. So he reached into the vessel,
took out money and bribed them ...
 One Obstacle after Another 1121

Since the princess is captive in a place of monetary lust, then with

money, the viceroy can do whatever he wants and bribe whomever
he wants. When a person has a certain Just, particuJarly the lust for
money, he or she can be easily bribed and blinded by the object of
their lust, for the Torah says that a bribe can even blind the eyes of
the wise (see Devarim, ch. 16).
We see clearly how Just, pa11icularJy monetary lust, clouds and
distorts a person's judgment. He or she is incapable of accepting or
listening to anything that incompatible with their lust. Such people
certainly don't want to hear that they are living a lie; indeed, they
can't hear or see the error of their ways.
Money especially is a test of faith, as our sages said (Gemara,
tractate Eruvin 65): "Three things characterize a person- his goblet,
his purse, and his anger." In other words, a person's character is
evident by how he acts when drinking wine, when dealing with
money, and when encountering a challenge to his temper.
Another allusion to one's behavior in monetaiy matters appears in
the Mishna (tractate Zevachim, ch. 5): "The holy of holy sacrifices
are slaughtered in the north." In other words, if you want to examine
if a person is really as "holy of holies" as he presents himself,
sJaughter him in the "north", for "no11h" symbolizes money. You
can check a person's true character by testing him in financial
matters. Is he fair in commerce? Does he give to charity? Does he
pay his workers on time? Does he adhere to the laws of Torah that
tell him when and how to spend money? Does he avoid touching a
cent that doesn't belong to him? If the answer to all these questions
is yes, then that persan truly is "holy of holies." So, when you
slaughter him in his "north" -you take away his money- then he'll
show just how much genuine emuna he really has.

... and entered the city. And it was a beautiful

city. He approached a man, and rented lodgings,
for he would need to stay there some time. For it
would need much cunning and wisdom to free
her ...
122 1 The Garden of Yearning

Again, we see just how much patience we need in redeeming

emuna. Even now - after the viceroy has attained lofty spiritual
levels and traversed a myriad of obstacles - he has reached the
place where he can free the princess, but he still must wait. The
task of waiting is a lofty spiritual task, required at every rung of
the spiritual ladder. Mistakes and blemishes corne from haste and
impatience, like picking unripe fruit: Today, it's sour. But if one
waits for the right time a few days later, the same fmit will be
delightfully sweet. Even great tzaddikim have made the mistake -
relative to their lofty spiritual status, ofcourse - oftrying to hasten
the premature. Hashem has His own time table of salvations.
Hashem alone did, does, and will do every action in the universe.
Our task is simply to desire to fulfill Hashem's will, and to yearn
with pangs oflonging for the moment when we can do His bidding.
When the right time cornes, Hashem helps a persan to successfully
complete his task and to merit a fulfilling life of Torah, mitzvot,
and good deeds.

d how he freed her, he did not tell, but

� ,�
,.;;�--, m the end he freed her ...

Rebbe Nachman didn't reveal how the viceroy freed the princess,
for it's impossible to tell - this is a persona! story that varies
from person to person. Each one of us has to rescue his or her
own persona! princess - emuna - and reveal emuna to the world.
Each person has his or her own way of accomplishing this task,
and one person can't imitate another's method, for each soul has
its own mission and mode of operation. There's no connection
at ail between one person's way of serving Hashem and another
person's.
For that reason, it's senseless to look at other people. Each of us
is a unique individual with a unique task that no one else can do.
Rebbe Nachman elaborates on the passage in Ezekiel, Chapter 33,
that states, "Abraham was one." Abraham served Hashem as if he
were the only person in the world, and therefore ignored ail the
idolaters ail around him.
 One Obstacle after Another 1123

Just as every individual has a separate genetic map, each soul

has its own spiritual root, task, and tikkun in the world. For that
reason, there's no purpose in judging ourselves by comparing
ourselves with others. For example, if one person learns four hours
of Gemara in one sitting, but another person's attention span,
especially for Gemara, is half an hour, that doesn't mean that the
latter is inferior, Heaven forbid. Tt could be that he has already
corrected what he needed to correct in the area of Talmudic study
in a previous reincarnation, while during this life, his mission is
totally different. No one expects a fisherman to fly a jet aircraft.
Conversely, a jet pilot can't sell you a fish for your Shabbat meal.
Each of us has his or her own vital mission. Therefore, we should
concentrate on performing our task with joy and innocence no
matter how Hashem runs our lives without comparing ourselves
to anyone else, for Hashem leads each of us down the path that is
conducive to our own individual tikkun.

Confession
The only way to find our unique path in life and in the service of
Hashem - without confusion and without becoming discouraged
from looking at and listening to others - is to spend an hour a
day in hitbodedut, persona) prayer and self-evaluation. Rebbe
Nachman explains (see Likutei Moharan I: 4), that when a person
confesses daily, then the true tzaddik helps pave the way to a true
correction of the soul according to that individual's needs. When
Rebbe Nachman was alive, his disciples would confess to him
personally. Now that Rebbe Nachman is no longer in the flesh, we
confess in our persona! prayer to Hashem, and we maintain our
bond with our teacher and spiritual guide - Rebbe Nachman - by
fulfilling his directives and advice as brought down in his writings.
When we do so, Rebbe Nachman intervenes on our behalf in the
upper worlds, and from his sphere of influence there - unlimited
by physical boundaries and restraints - and helps each of us that is
bound to him. The Gemara teaches us that the true tzaddik never
dies, and can do much more after his life in the material world than
he can during his physical existence.
1241 The Garden of Yearning

ln addition, hitbodedut is the only thing in the service of Hashem

that is truly persona!. Ali other mitzvot are mostly standard and
uniform: Everyone wears tefillin, everyone learns Torah, and
everyone observes the Sabbath. Everyone even prays from the
same prescribed prayers.
Only hitbodedut is totally individual; there are no ironclad laws
and no standard format. Each person pours his heart out to Hasbem
according to bis current state of mind and body. This is the place
to emphasize and warn that no one must hear what we say to
Hashem. If someone has the urge to yell or cry out, he or sbe must
be absolutely certain that no one else is within earshot. One can
also cry out in silence, from the depths of the heart. Such a silent
scream can't even be heard by the person sitting next to you on the
train or plane.
Therefore, our holy Rebbe didn't tell us how the viceroy freed the
princess, for the way to free the princess is by way of hitbodedut,
which varies from person to person. If someone truly yearns for
emuna and to rescue his own persona! princess, then be should
devote an hour a day to hitbodedut, no matter what.

Thoughts of Repentance
Now, we can readily understand what our holy Rebbe Nachman
said in the introduction: "Along the way, I told a tale, that everyone
who heard it had tboughts of repentance ... "
When a person merits hearing this poignant tale of the lost princess,
and sees the viceroy's dedication in finding and freeing her, the
perseverance, conviction, commitment, yearning, and triumpb
over all obstacles and setbacks - even when the princess becomes
more elusive - he or she is aroused with a desire for teshuva,
for getting doser to Hashem. The road to teshuva is strewn with
obstacles, barriers, setbacks, highs and lows, successes and failures.
Likewise, when we walk the path of teshuva with the same courage
and conviction that the viceroy exbibited in the performance of
his challenging task, we're assured ultimate success. The important
thing is to constantly fuel the desire and yearning for holiness at all
 One Obstacle after Another 1125

costs, forever continuing our persona! search for true emuna.

This is the thought of repentance - arousing the strong desire to
walk in the path of teshuva, no matter what, saying in our hearts,
"l want to make teshuva! I'll never abandon my desire to get close
to Hashem!
Completed with Hashem's loving grace, may His Holy Name
be praised forever and ever
1261 The Garden of Yearning

Glossary
Amalek (Biblical)- evil grandson ofEsau; nickname for the Yetzer Hara,
the Evil Inclination
Baal Teshuva (Hebrew) -- spiritually awakened Jew
Bitul (Hebrew) - literally "cancellation;" in spirituality, it connotes
the nullification of ego necessary for willful submission to a higher
authority.
Chassid (Hebrew) - literally "pious person", but alludes to the disciples
of the Chassidic movement, founded by Rabbi Yisroel Baal Shem Tov in
the early 1 81h Century CE
Dinim (Hebrew )- the spiritual forces of severe judgments that are created
by a person's misdeeds.
Emuna (Hebrew) - the firm belief in a single, supreme, omniscient,
benevolent, spiritual, supernatural, and all-powerful Creator of the
universe, who we refer to as God.
Emunat Chachamim (Hebrew) - the belief in our sages
Gemara (Aramaic)- The 2 nd-5'11 Century CE elaborations on the Mishna,
which serve as the foundation of Jewish law
Geula (Hebrew)- the redemption process of the Jewish people
Hashem (Hebrew) - literally means "the name", a substitute tenn for The
Almighty so that we don't risk using God's name in vain.
Hashgacha Pratit (Hebrew) - Divine Providence, Hashem's individual
and persona! supervision over each creation
Hitbodedut (Hebrew) - persona! prayer, usually in seclusion
Kabbala (Hebrew) - Jewish esoteric thought
Kedusha (Hebrew) - holiness
Kelim (Hebrew) - literally tools or vessels, in Kabbala these are the
vessels that hold Divine illumination
Malchut (Hebrew) - monarchy, the 7'11 lower sphere of Divinity in
Kabbalistic thought
Mishna (Hebrew) - The oral elaboration of the Torah as given from
Hashem to Moses, finally codified by Rabbi Akiva, his pupil Rabbi Meir,
and his pupil Rabbi Yehuda HaNassi, l "-2nd Century, CE
Mitzvah (Hebrew)- a cornrnandment of the Torah; good deed.
 Glossary 1 127

Mitzvot (Hebrew, pl.) - literally, the commandments of theTorah; good

deeds.
Moshiach (Hebrew)- Messiah
Neshama (Hebrew)- a person's Divine soul
Ratzon (Hebrew)- will, desire
Shabbat (Hebrew)- Sabbath, day of rest
Shalom Bayit (Hebrew)- literally "peace in the home", marital bliss
Shmirat Habrit (Hebrew) - literally "guarding the covenant"; male
holiness in thought, speech, and deed, particularly the use of one's
reproductive organs only in the perfonnance of a mitzvah
Shmirat Eynayim (Hebrew) - "guarding the eyes", or refraining from
looking at forbidden objects, particularly at a woman other than one's wife
Shulchan Aruch (Hebrew) - Code of Jewish Law, compiled by Rabbi
Joseph Caro ofTzfat, late 16th Century CE
Sitra Achra (Aramaic) - literally "the dark side", connotes the forces of
evil, the opposite of holiness
Shmitta - Sabbatical year, once every seven years when the land is
allowed to rest
Talmud (Hebrew) - Jewish oral tradition, comprised of the Mishna and
the Gemara
Tanna (Aramaic)- Mishnaic sage, 1 st - 2nd Century CE
Tikkun (Hebrew)- correction of the soul
Tikkunim (Hebrew)- plural for tikkun
Teshuva (Hebrew) - literally "retuming", the term that refers to the
process of atoning for one's misdeeds
Tzaddik (Hebrew) -- extremely pious and upright person
Tzaddikim (Hebrew)- plural for t::addik
Tzedaka (Hebrew)- charity
Yetzer Hara (Hebrew)- Evil Inclination
Yetzer Tov (Hebrew)- inclination to do good
Y ir'at Shamayim (Hebrew)- literally "the fear of Hashem", a term for
sincere piety
Zohar (Hebrew) - the 2'"i-Century C.E. esoteric interpretation of theTorah
by Rebbe Shimon Bar Yochai and his disciples
 The Garden ofYearning
A wonderfully inspiring interpretation
of Rebbe Nachman 's Tale, "The Lost Princess"

By
Rabbi Shalom Arush
Director of "Chut shel Chessed" Institutions
Author of "The Garden of Emuna" and other books

Translated by:
Rabbi Lazer Brody

Elul, 5767
 Did you enjoy this book?
If so, please help us spread the message of emuna
around the world. Send your contributions to:
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