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Handbooks of Sociology and Social Research
Series Editor:
Howard B. Kaplan, Texas A&M University, College Station, Texas

For other title published in series, go to

www.springer.com/series/6055
 Handbook of
Politics
State and Society in Global Perspective

Edited by

Kevin T. Leicht
The University of Iowa
Department of Sociology, Iowa City, IA, USA

J. Craig Jenkins
The Ohio State University
Department of Sociology, Columbus, OH, USA
Editors
Kevin T. Leicht J. Craig Jenkins
Department of Sociology Department of Sociology
The University of Iowa The Ohio State University
124 Seashore Hall W. 190 North Oval Mall
Iowa City, IA Columbus, OH
USA USA
[email protected] [email protected]

ISBN 978-0-387-68929-6 e-ISBN 978-0-387-68930-2

DOI 10.1007/978-0-387-68930-2
Springer New York Dordrecht Heidelberg London

Library of Congress Control Number: 2009933260

© Springer Science+Business Media, LLC 2010

All rights reserved. This work may not be translated or copied in whole or in part without the written permission of
the publisher (Springer Science+Business Media, LLC, 233 Spring Street, New York, NY 10013, USA), except for
brief excerpts in connection with reviews or scholarly analysis. Use in connection with any form of information storage
and retrieval, electronic adaptation, computer software, or by similar or dissimilar methodology now known or hereafter
developed is forbidden.
The use in this publication of trade names, trademarks, service marks, and similar terms, even if they are not identified
as such, is not to be taken as an expression of opinion as to whether or not they are subject to proprietary rights.

Printed on acid-free paper

Springer is part of Springer Science+Business Media (www.springer.com)

 Contributors

Jeffrey Alexander, The Center for Cultural Sociology, Yale University, New Haven, CT, USA
Paul Almeida, Department of Sociology, Texas A&M University, College Station, TX, USA
Edwin Amenta, Department of Sociology, University of California- Irvine, Irvine, CA, USA
Peter J. Barwis, Department of Sociology, University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee,
Milwaukee, WI, USA
Jason Beckfield, Department of Sociology, Harvard University, Cambridge, MA, USA
Janet Box-Steffensmeier, Department of Political Science, The Ohio State University,
Columbus, OH, USA
David Brady, Department of Sociology, Duke University, Durham, NC, USA
Robert Brulle, Department of Culture and Communications, Drexel University,
Philadelphia, PA, USA
Val Burris, Department of Sociology, University of Oregon, Eugene, OR, USA
Paul Burstein, Department of Sociology, University of Washington, Seattle, WA, USA
Nitsan Chorev, Department of Sociology, Brown University, Providence, RI, USA
Terry Nichols Clark, Department of Sociology, University of Chicago, Chicago, IL, USA
Edward Crenshaw, Department of Sociology, The Ohio State University,
Columbus, OH, USA
Joshua Dubrow, Department of Sociology, The Ohio State University, Columbus, OH, USA
Delia Dumitrescu, Department of Political Science, The Ohio State University,
Columbus, OH, USA
Andrew Fullerton, Department of Sociology, Oklahoma State University,
Stillwater, OK, USA
Liah Greenfeld, Department of Political Science, Boston University, Boston, MA, USA
Rachel Harvey, Department of Sociology, University of Chicago, Chicago, IL, USA
John Higley, Department of Government, The University of Texas at Austin,
Austin, TX, USA

v
vi Contributors

Greg Hooks, Department of Sociology, Washington State University, Pullman, WA, USA
David Jacobs, Department of Sociology, The Ohio State University, Columbus, OH, USA
J. Craig Jenkins, Department of Sociology, The Ohio State University, Columbus, OH, USA
Bob Jessop, Department of Sociology, Lancaster University, Lancaster, UK
Hank Johnston, Department of Sociology, San Diego State University, San Diego, CA, USA
Edgar Kiser, Department of Sociology, University of Washington, Seattle, WA, USA
Matthew Lange, Department of Sociology, McGill University, Montreal, QC, Canada
Kevin T. Leicht, Department of Sociology, University of Iowa, Iowa City, IA, USA
Linda Lobao, Department of Sociology, The Ohio State University, Columbus, OH, USA
David Eric Malczewski, Department of Political Science, Boston University,
Boston, MA, USA
David S. Meyer, Department of Sociology, University of California- Irvine, Irvine, CA, USA
Valentine M. Moghadam, Sociology and Women’s Studies, Purdue University,
West Lafayette, IN, USA
Anthony Mughan, Department of Political Science, The Ohio State University,
Columbus, OH, USA
Anthony Oberschall, Department of Sociology, University of North Carolina,
Chapel Hill, NC, USA
Clayton D. Peoples, Department of Sociology, University of Nevada, Reno, NV, USA
Steve Pfaff, Department of Sociology, University of Washington, Seattle, WA, USA
Christopher Pieper, Department of Sociology, University of Texas at Austin,
Austin, TX, USA
Kelly M. Ramsey, Department of Sociology, University of California- Irvine,
Irvine, CA, USA
Kent Redding, Department of Sociology, University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee,
Milwaukee, WI, USA
Daisy Verduzco Reyes, Department of Sociology, University of California- Irvine,
Irvine, CA, USA
Kristopher Robison, Department of Sociology, Northern Illinois University,
DeKalb, IL, USA
David Sciulli, Department of Sociology, Texas A&M University, College Station, TX, USA
Kazimierz Slomczynski, Department of Sociology, The Ohio State University,
Columbus, OH, USA
Anand E. Sokhey, Department of Political Science, University of Colorado at Boulder,
Boulder, CO, USA
Georg Sørensen, Department of Political Science, Universit of Århus, Århus, Denmark
Contributors vii

Benjamin Sosnaud, Department of Sociology, Duke University, Durham, NC, USA

Michael J. Stern, Department of Sociology and Anthropology, College of Charleston,
Charleston, SC, USA
Nik Summers, Department of Sociology, University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee,
Milwaukee, WI, USA
Michael Wallace, Department of Sociology, University of Connecticut, Storrs, CT, USA
David L Wiekliem, Department of Sociology, University of Connecticut, Storrs, CT, USA
Michael Young, Department of Sociology, University of Texas at Austin, Austin, TX, USA
Dingxin Zhao, Department of Sociology, University of Chicago, Chicago, IL, USA
 Contents

Contributors .................................................................................................................... v

Chapter 1. Introduction: The Study of Politics Enters

the Twenty-First Century ......................................................................... 1
Kevin T. Leicht and J. Craig Jenkins

Part I Theory in the Study of Politics

Chapter 2. Institutional Theory .................................................................................. 15

Edwin Amenta and Kelly M. Ramsey

Chapter 3. Redesigning the State, Reorienting State Power,

and Rethinking the State .......................................................................... 41
Bob Jessop

Chapter 4. Public Opinion, Public Policy, and Democracy ...................................... 63

Paul Burstein

Chapter 5. Democracy, Professions and Societal Constitutionalism ....................... 81

David Sciulli

Chapter 6. Power, Politics, and the Civil Sphere ....................................................... 111

Jeffrey C. Alexander

Chapter 7. On the Origins of Neoliberalism: Political Shifts

and Analytical Challenges ........................................................................ 127
Nitsan Chorev

Chapter 8. Transboundary Politics............................................................................. 145

Jason Beckfield

Chapter 9. Elite Theory and Elites ............................................................................. 161

John Higley

ix
x Contents

Chapter 10. Conflict Theory ....................................................................................... 177

A. Oberschall

Chapter 11. When and Where Class Matters for Political Outcomes:
Class and Politics in a Cross-National Perspective .............................. 195
Kazimierz M. Slomczynski and Joshua Kjerulf Dubrow

Part II Political Change and Transformation

Chapter 12. Social Movements and Contentious Politics ......................................... 217

David S. Meyer and Daisy Verduzco Reyes

Chapter 13. Political Violence as an Object of Study: The Need

for Taxonomic Clarity............................................................................. 235
Edward Crenshaw and Kristopher Robison

Chapter 14. Corporations, Capitalists, and Campaign Finance .............................. 247

Val Burris

Chapter 15. States and Economic Development........................................................ 263

Matthew Lange

Chapter 16. Gender, Politics, and Women’s Empowerment .................................... 279

Valentine M. Moghadam

Chapter 17. Globalization and Collective Action ...................................................... 305

Paul D. Almeida

Chapter 18. Cultural Analysis of Political Protest .................................................... 327

Hank Johnston

Chapter 19. Religion and Post-secular Politics .......................................................... 349

Christopher Pieper and Michael P. Young

Chapter 20. Space and Politics .................................................................................... 367

Gregory Hooks and Linda Lobao

Chapter 21. Politics and the Environment ................................................................. 385

Robert J. Brulle

Chapter 22. Politics as a Cultural Phenomenon ........................................................ 407

Liah Greenfeld and Eric Malczewski

Chapter 23. Urban Politics .......................................................................................... 423

Terry Nichols Clark and Rachel Harvey

Chapter 24. Democracy and Democratization .......................................................... 441

Georg Sørensen
Contents xi

Chapter 25. Authoritarian State and Contentious Politics....................................... 459

Dingxin Zhao

Chapter 26. Mass Media and Democratic Politics .................................................... 477

Delia Dumitrescu and Anthony Mughan

Chapter 27. Elections and Voting ............................................................................... 493

Kent Redding, Peter J. Barwis, and Nik Summers

Chapter 28. The Politics of Economic Inequality ...................................................... 521

David Brady and Benjamin Sosnaud

Chapter 29. The Political Sociology of Criminal Justice .......................................... 543

David Jacobs

Part III Methods in the Study of Politics

Chapter 30. Comparative-Historical Methodology in Political Sociology ................. 571

Edgar Kiser and Steve Pfaff

Chapter 31. Multilevel Models .................................................................................... 589

Andrew S. Fullerton, Michael Wallace, and Michael J. Stern

Chapter 32. Event History Methods ........................................................................... 605

Janet M. Box-Steffensmeier and Anand E. Sokhey

Chapter 33. Social Networks and Political Analysis ................................................. 619

Clayton D. Peoples

Chapter 34. Time Series Analysis of Political Change .............................................. 637

David L. Weakliem

Index ................................................................................................................................. 653

 CHAPTER 1

Introduction: The Study of Politics

Enters the Twenty-First Century
Kevin T. Leicht and J. Craig Jenkins

The study of politics and political phenomena is important for understanding a variety of
questions that are at the core of social science research, theorizing, and policy analysis. This
collection by top scholars of politics is designed to provide a broad overview of the substan-
tive, theoretical and methodological state of political research while focusing on key areas that
deserve fresh research and study by new generations of sociologists and political scientists.
Each of our authors was given a specific charge – to thoroughly interrogate a literature in
the study of politics, pointing to the strengths and deficiencies of current work, and to lay out
an agenda for future research that reflected not only what they were doing but also the themes
that others could pick up on as well. Our collective results read more like contributions to
an Annual Review volume than a standard Handbook or Encyclopedia, but that is largely by
design. We wanted to give our authors a chance to delineate a specific subfield and define the
types of research and theorizing they would like to see develop as a result of their exhaustive
reviews. The end result is a volume that we hope will orient research on politics for several
years to come.
Our handbook is organized into three sections. Part 1 deals with Theory in the Study of
Politics, which privileges the discussion of theory and theoretical developments for under-
standing twenty-first century political activity. These contributions summarize the state of
development of most of the theories that have been used to explain political activity over the
past 30–40 years, from institutional theory to theories of class. Part 2 deals with Political
Change and Transformation, which focuses on specific institutional arrangements and political
strategies for influencing political decision-making around the world. These contributions
cover the gambit of political arenas from terrorism, elections, and authoritarian regimes to
economic inequality, development, criminal justice, and globalization. Part 3 deals with the
state of methodology in the study of politics. This is one of the unique features of our col-
lection that is underemphasized elsewhere. Here our authors survey the state of knowledge
regarding different ways of studying politics from comparative-historical methodology and
social networks to hierarchical models and time-series analysis.
The study of politics and political phenomena has expanded widely over the past 20–25
years, almost to the point where every significant social science research issue can be defined
as a variation on the study of politics. If politics is defined as why, when and how people get

K.T. Leicht and J.C. Jenkins (eds.), Handbook of Politics: State and Society in Global Perspective, 1
Handbooks of Sociology and Social Research, © Springer Science+Business Media, LLC 2010
2 Kevin T. Leicht and J. Craig Jenkins

what they want, then the study of politics is synonymous with the study of social life. But to
say that is to deprive the field of its vitality and to deprive politics of its meaning. It is also
to trivialize politics as a distinctive social and cultural phenomenon worthy of study in its
own right. Our contributors make the comprehensive case that the study of politics is as vital
as ever and that political science, political sociology and policy analysis are not going to be
subsumed under another title any time soon. Our authors work with the assumption that politics
centers on contests for control over the state. Disclaimers to the contrary, the end of the state
is not near and, in fact, its importance and powers appear to be growing as the forces of
globalization, autonomous culture and individuals continue to grow.

PART 1: THEORY IN THE STUDY OF POLITICS

The development of theory is at the core of the study of politics from its beginnings in political
philosophy in ancient times. Our authors in this section of the Handbook examine the current
state of theorizing in political analysis. The result is an integrated understanding of the state
of theorizing in the study of politics, with a major focus on the workings of different political
institutions. Most (but not all) of these institutions reside in conventional nation-states, and
one is struck by the continued vitality of that very territorially based idea for the workings
of an increasingly interconnected world that is (allegedly) globalized and interconnected and
where individuals are increasingly freed from social constraints to choose their fate.
Amenta and Ramsey begin our discussion of political theory by reviewing the current
state of political institutional theory. While it is true that most political sociologists and
political scientists consider themselves as “institutionalists,” there are a wide variety of
meanings for this term and ways of understanding the use of institutions in political theo-
rizing. Amenta and Ramsey review and interrogate sociological institutionalism, historical
institutionalism and political institutionalism as distinct variants of institutional theory with
distinctive sets of strengths and weaknesses. Sociological institutionalism draws most heavily
on institutionalism in the study of organizations with its focus on culture and ideational
causes of political arrangements. Historical institutionalists focus on big questions and use
conjunctural and path dependence explanations for distinctively macro-level outcomes.
Political institutionalists focus on the process of state and polity formation as critical in
determining the functioning of contemporary political institutions. All focus on higher-
level, macro determinants of political actions and activities that occur at lower levels of
analysis. The distinctive methodological traditions of each form of institutionalism have
prevented the type of cross-fertilization that would advance institutional explanations of
politics by combining cultural and macrostructural explanations of institutional develop-
ment and change in the same package.
Jessop (in “Redesigning the State, Reorienting State Power, and Rethinking State Theory”)
picks up on this theme of cross-fertilization in his interrogation of state theory and recent
advancements that have looked beyond traditional state-centered explanations of political
activity. Jessop suggests that studies of state activity and state institutional arrangements
seemed to take a back seat to other salient issues following the end of the Cold War, the
rise and recognition of globalization processes, and the rise of new social movements. New
challenges to the primacy of the state and the taken-for-granted features of nation-states in par-
ticular call for a broadening of the understanding of state forms (away from the Westphalian
and modern Weberian state), state types (not all states are capitalist states just because they
interact with global capitalist markets and state socialism is dead), and the interface of global
1. Introduction: The Study of Politics Enters the Twenty-First Century 3

organizations, social movements and other social forms with state apparatus whose reason for
existing can no longer be taken for granted.
Burstein’s contribution narrows the reader’s focus to the responsiveness of states to public
opinion under democratic institutional arrangements. He focuses on the seemingly intractable
problem of capturing the true effects of public opinion on public policy, and rightly sug-
gests that the issue is fraught with bad measurement, selection biases, and the conflation of
“should” and “is.” He points to a new research agenda that studies a broader range of political
issues and the characteristics of policies and polities that allow salient public opinion to exist
in the first place. For public opinion to have an effect on policy, public opinion must first exist,
and this variable would help researchers avoid the trap of studying only policy domains where
public opinion is already formed or areas that are “hot button” issues at the expense of a uni-
verse of less publicized, but no less important policy domains. He proposes that we develop
coherent measures of public opinion appropriately specified so that its effects on public
policy in specific policy domains might be assessed. The objective, of course, is to address the
longstanding pluralist vs. elite theory debate.
Sciulli (in “Democracy and Societal Constitutionalism”) picks up on a point that Burstein
concludes with by examining the link between democracy, constitutionalism and civil society
institutions and (especially) organized professional groups. A focus on the actions and effi-
cacy of professional groups in state activity shifts the locus of study toward procedures and
proceduralism as a way of classifying what states do. He argues that comparative politics, in
particular, needs to incorporate conceptions of professional groups and professionalism as
critical components in explaining various institutional designs. These institutional designs
are based on different conceptions of state/civil society relationships as these are mediated by
professional groups and professional organizations. Professional groups such as lawyers act
as critical mediators who see the state as a set of institutionalized procedures that legitimate
democratic state activities.
Jeffrey Alexander (in “Power, Politics and the Civil Sphere”) examines systematically
the role of the public sphere in the continued analysis and vitality of politics. The public
sphere has been assaulted by the growing power of the state as an organization on one hand,
the aggregation of interests it produces, and the growing economic power of multinational
corporations and other global economic actors. Is it possible for the public sphere to survive
these onslaughts and others? Reviewing elites’ responses to public outrage over scandals and
misbehaviors leads Alexander to a resounding “yes.” He presents a series of reasons why the
public sphere has changed (not toward an undifferentiated and passive mass, but in the means
of communication and the renewed importance of image, charisma, and performance) while
still remaining an important focal point for understanding contemporary politics.
Chorev examines (in “The Origins of Neo-Liberalism”) the spread of a specific institutional
political form, the minimalist state with unregulated markets and extensive deregulation,
otherwise known as “neoliberalism.” Far from arguing that neoliberalism is all of a piece,
Chorev argues that there are different political mechanisms for understanding neoliberalism
(national vs. global and political actions vs. political institutions) that need to be integrated to
develop a fuller understanding of the compelling embrace of neoliberalism as it has affected
political organizations around the world. On a global scale, neo-liberalism stands for far more
than simply standing back and allowing markets to run rampant.
Jason Beckfield (in “Transboundary Politics”) develops the comparative theme still fur-
ther by looking at all forms of international or transboundary politics. Beckfield argues that
network theory and analysis provides a useful way for studying globalized politics because
it focuses on the actual connections between actors and the strategic nodes actors inhabit in
4 Kevin T. Leicht and J. Craig Jenkins

networks of concrete social interaction. The concluding questions in Beckfield’s contribution

revolve around the ability of transnational network analysis and theorizing to contribute to
studies of new forms of inequality and political conflict.
John Higley turns our attention to a long-standing traditional type of political analysis,
the study of elites and elitism. In addition to reasserting the claim that elites and their creation
appear to be inevitable and even desirable consequences of all political systems, Higley sug-
gests that the recognition of elites, the effects of the masses on elites, and the dynamics of
conflicts between elites and nonelite groups constitute the central dynamic for understanding
complex political phenomena. This reassertion of the central and autonomous role of elites in
political decision making attempts to reinvigorate the study of elites in different types of polit-
ical configurations and circumstances, while casting a sometimes skeptical eye on utopian
ideologies that claim elites are superfluous parasites on contemporary political and social life.
Higley puts forward the distinctive argument that rule by the few may not only be inevitable
but also socially beneficial.
Obershall seeks to explain the development and seeming inevitability of conflict in the
political sphere by reexamining some of the central claims of broadly construed conflict the-
ory. The competition of individuals, institutions, and organizations for scarce resources pro-
duces different configurations of violent and nonviolent conflict in an attempt to secure wants
and goods from the larger world. Conflict theory explains why coercion and violence are
selected as choices to secure these goods. The study of conflict gets to the root of our concep-
tions of human nature, the sources of ethnic cleansing, civil wars, and genocide, and the role
of violence as a strategy in political mobilization. Obershall ends his contribution by calling
for more research on conflict dynamics (rather than conflict origins) as a way of limiting the
spread and duration of political violence in the world.
The final contribution to the section on theory in the study of politics interrogates the
role that class membership and conceptions of class have on political attitudes and behaviors.
Slomczynski and Dubrow suggest that the overall utility of political class analysis comes in a
variety of forms and that class definitions that focus on universal characteristics of all complex
polities and specific definitions of class salient in specific situations both yield considerable
fruit in explaining changes in political attitudes and behaviors cross-nationally. Key to the
renewed vitality of class analysis in politics is a recognition that class alignments with specific
interest groups in the polity change, and that a renewed focus on the micro–macro linkages
that take into account individual attitudes and behaviors toward collective action is a central
task that class analyses of politics must confront. They show how this type of work can be
rejuvenated, building on the theoretical foundations developed much earlier by figures such
as Marx and Weber.

PART 2: POLITICAL CHANGE AND TRANSFORMATION

The contributions in part 2 of our volume focus on the arenas where political change takes
place. Each of our authors examines a specific arena of political activity and makes sugges-
tions for new directions for the substantive study of politics. These chapters focus on specific
arenas of conflict over political change, the role of strategically located actors in political
change dynamics, and the sometimes radical actions that are taken in the name of promoting
political change and evolution.
Key to any study of political change and transformation is the study of social movements. Our
contribution by Meyer and Reyes (“Social Movements and Contentious Politics”) addresses
1. Introduction: The Study of Politics Enters the Twenty-First Century 5

many of the perennial concerns of social movement scholars, in particular the assessment of
efficacy and the effects of social movements on people’s life, work, and public policy. Social
movements are, by definition, slippery phenomenon producing a wide variety of costs and
benefits, only some of which are connected with whether movements produce concrete and
identifiable policy outcomes. The further study of social movements lies in its linkage to the
study of other forms of contentious politics.
Closely tied to the study of social movements is the study of political violence. There is
enough overlap between social movement activity, terrorism, and guerilla war that researchers are
having difficulty in distinguishing between when and how violence is used and for what purpose.
Crenshaw and Robison point to the intended targets of political violence as a key differentiation in
a taxonomy that leads to different theoretical explanations for guerrilla warfare, terrorist activity,
and social movement activity. This emphasis keeps the focus on violence as a strategy rather than
focusing on the seemingly irrational aspects of political violence. They show that mass media is
central to providing a stage for terrorism while having little effect on guerrilla violence.
Burris (“Corporations, Capitalists, and Campaign Finance”), Lange (“The State and Eco-
nomic Development”), and Moghadam (“Gender, Politics and Women’s Empowerment”) all
examine the roles that different organized groups have on political change and development.
Burris suggests that the ability to study corporate PAC contributions in detail has opened up
new and as-yet unexplored avenues for the study of elites and politics. Researchers have to
expand their critical lens to elections outside of the traditional 1970 – early 1990s window,
place more emphasis on soft money contributions and expand the analysis of corporate mon-
etary influence to state and local elections.
Lange suggests that international development, and the study of the relationships between
the state and development has been distorted by neo-classical scholars’ views regarding the
overall ineffectiveness of state activity. The developmental literature is moving beyond this
toward a more complex understanding of the factors that promote economic development,
effectiveness and ineffectiveness. Interrogating this real world characterization is a more fruitful
avenue for research than the comparison of real states and abstract markets.
Moghadam focuses on the growing representation of women as representatives in for-
mal electoral and government systems. Women’s political participation matters for reasons
of equity and impact (representation, redistribution, and recognition). These changes have
occurred not only because of women’s increased participation in formal politics, but also
because of their roles in civil society and increasing presence in web-based political activism.
She also shows that this is a global process that is furthered by transnational networks, inter-
national communication and the growing “smallness” of the world.
Almeida (“Globalization and Collective Action”), Johnston (“Culture and Political Pro-
test”), Piper and Young (“Religion and Post-Secular Politics”) and Hooks and Lobao (“Space
and Politics”) each focus on collective action in different spaces and locales. Almeida exam-
ines the history and contemporary context surrounding resistance to globalization and calls
for more emphasis on local conditions outside of the global north that lead to mobilizations
of large numbers of otherwise disenfranchised people. This mobilization by people in rapidly
developing and less developed countries is widespread and is partially a response to politi-
cal openings and democratization. More comparative research across countries and world
regions would also enhance our shared understanding of the composition of the organizational
infrastructure in civil society (including transnational civil society) that organizes against eco-
nomic liberalization reforms and policies.
Johnston argues that resource mobilization and political opportunity structure analyses
have not drowned out the study of culture and cultural influences on global political activities.
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conservans mortale corpus à mortalibus vermibus, et eschara cum
impressâ liquoris salium commisturâ. What is Death? Nihil certe aliud
quam Balsami dominium, Mumiæ interitus, salium ultima materia.
Do you understand this, Reader? If you do, I do not.

But he is intelligible when he tells us that Life may be likened to Fire,

and that all we want is to discover the fuel for keeping it up,—the
true Lignum Vitæ. It is not against nature, he contends, that we
should live till the renovation of all things; it is only against our
knowledge, and beyond it. But there are medicaments for prolonging
life; and none but the foolish or the ignorant would ask why then is
it that Princes and Kings who can afford to purchase them, die
nevertheless like other people. The reason says the great Bombast
von Hohenheim is that their physicians know less about medicine
than the very boors, and moreover that Princes and Kings lead
dissolute lives. And if it be asked why no one except Hermes
Trismegistus has used such medicaments; he replies that others
have used them, but have not let it be known.

Van Helmont was once of opinion that no metallic preparation could

contain in itself the blessing of the Tree of Life, though that the
Philosopher's stone had been discovered was a fact that consisted
with his own sure knowledge. This opinion however was in part
changed, in consequence of some experiments made with an aurific
powder, given him by a stranger after a single evening's
acquaintance; (vir peregrinus, unius vesperi amicus:) these
experiments convinced him that the stone partook of what he calls
Zoophyte life, as distinguished both from vegetative and sensitive.
But the true secret he thought, must be derived from the vegetable
world, and he sought for it in the Cedar, induced, as it seems, by the
frequent mention of that tree in the Old Testament. He says much
concerning the cedar,—among other things, that when all other
plants were destroyed by the Deluge, and their kinds preserved only
in their seed, the Cedars of Lebanon remained uninjured under the
waters. However when he comes to the main point, he makes a full
stop, saying, Cætera autem quæ de Cedro sunt, mecum sepelientur:
nam mundus non capax est. It is not unlikely that if his mysticism
had been expressed in the language of intelligible speculation, it
might have been found to accord with some of Berkeley's theories in
the Siris. But for his reticence upon this subject, as if the world were
not worthy of his discoveries, he ought to have been deprived of his
two remaining talents. Five he tells us he had received for his
portion, but because instead of improving them, he had shown
himself unworthy of so large a trust, he by whom they were given
had taken from him three. “Ago illi gratias, quod cum contulisset in
me quinque talenta, fecissemque me indignum, et hactenus
repudium coram eo factus essem, placuit divinæ bonitati, auferre à
me tria, et relinquere adhuc bina, ut me sic ad meliorem frugem
exspectaret. Maluit, inquam, me depauperare et tolerare, ut non
essem utilis plurimis, modò me salvaret ab hujus mundi periculis. Sit
ipsi æterna sanctificatio.”
He has however informed posterity of the means by which he
prolonged the life of a man to extreme old age. This person whose
name was Jan Mass, was in the service of Martin Rythovius, the first
Bishop of Ypres, when that prelate, by desire of the illustrious
sufferers, assisted at the execution of Counts Egmond and Horn.
Mass was then in the twenty-fifth year of his age. When he was fifty-
eight, being poor, and having a large family of young children, he
came to Van Helmont, and entreated him to prolong his life if he
could, for the sake of these children, who would be left destitute in
case of his death, and must have to beg their bread from door to
door. Van Helmont, then a young man, was moved by such an
application, and considering what might be the likeliest means of
sustaining life in its decay, he called to mind the fact that wine is
preserved from corruption by the fumes of burnt brimstone; it then
occurred to him that the acid liquor of sulphur, acidum sulfuris
stagma, (it is better so to translate his words than to call it the
sulphuric acid,) must of necessity contain the fumes and odour of
sulphur, being, according to his chemistry, nothing but those fumes
of sulphur, combined with, or imbibed in, its mercurial salt. The next
step in his reasoning was to regard the blood as the wine of life; if
this could be kept sound, though longevity might not be the
necessary consequence, life would at least be preserved from the
many maladies which arose from its corruption, and the sanity, and
immunity from such diseases, and from the sufferings consequent
thereon, must certainly tend to its prolongation. He gave Mass
therefore a stone bottle of the distilled liquor of sulphur, and taught
him also how to prepare this oil from burnt sulphur. And he ordered
him at every meal to take two drops of it in his first draught of beer;
and not lightly to exceed that; two drops, he thought, contained
enough of the fumes for a sufficient dose. This was in the year
1600; and now, says Helmont, in 1641, the old man still walks about
the streets of Brussels. And what is still better, (quodque augustius
est,) in all these forty years, he has never been confined by any
illness, except that by a fall upon the ice he once broke his leg near
the knee; and he has constantly been free from fever, remaining a
slender and lean man, and always poor.
Jan Mass had nearly reached his hundredth year when this was
written, and it is no wonder that Van Helmont, who upon a fantastic
analogy had really prescribed an efficient tonic, should have
accounted by the virtue of his prescription for the health and vigour,
which a strong constitution had retained to that extraordinary age.
There is no reason for doubting the truth of his statement; but if Van
Helmont relied upon his theory, he must have made further
experiments; it is probable therefore that he either distrusted his
own hypothesis, or found upon subsequent trials that the result
disappointed him.

Van Helmont's works were collected and edited by his son Francis
Mercurius, who styles himself Philosophus per Unum in quo Omnia
Eremita peregrinans, and who dedicated the collection as a
holocaust to the ineffable Hebrew Name. The Vita Authoris which he
prefixed to it relates to his own life, not to his father's, and little can
be learnt from it, except that he is the more mystical and least
intelligible of the two. The most curious circumstances concerning
the father are what he has himself communicated in the treatise
entitled his Confession, into which the writer of his life in Aikin's
Biography seems not to have looked, nor indeed into any of his
works, the articles in that as in our other Biographies, being
generally compiled from compilations, so as to present the most
superficial information, with the least possible trouble to the writer
and the least possible profit to the reader,—skimming for him not the
cream of knowledge, but the scum.

Dr. Dove used to say that whoever wrote the life of an author
without carefully perusing his works acted as iniquitously as a Judge
who should pronounce sentence in a cause without hearing the
evidence; nay he maintained, the case was even worse, because
there was an even chance that the Judge might deliver a right
sentence, but it was impossible that a life so composed should be
otherwise than grievously imperfect, if not grossly erroneous. For all
the ordinary business of the medical profession he thought it
sufficient that a practitioner should thoroughly understand the
practice of his art, and proceed empirically: God help the patients,
he would say, if it were not so! and indeed without God's help they
would fare badly at the best. But he was of opinion that no one
could take a lively and at the same time a worthy interest in any art
or science without as it were identifying himself with it, and seeking
to make himself well acquainted with its history: a Physician
therefore, according to his way of thinking ought to be as curious
concerning the writings of his more eminent predecessors, and as
well read in the most illustrious of them, as a general in the wars of
Hannibal, Cæsar, the Black Prince, the Prince of Parma, Gustavus
Adolphus, and Marlborough. How carefully he had perused Van
Helmont was shown by the little landmarks whereby after an interval
of—alas how many years,—I have followed him through the volume,
—haud passibus æquis.

CHAPTER CLXXXVII.

VAN HELMONT'S WORKS, AND CERTAIN SPECIALITIES IN HIS LIFE.

Voilà mon conte.—Je ne sçay s'il est vray; mais, je l'ay ainsi ouy conter.—Possible que
cela est faux, possible que non.—Je m'en rapporte à ce qui en est. Il ne sera pas
damné qui le croira, ou décroira.

BRANTÔME.
“The works of Van Helmont,” Dr. Aikin says, “are now only consulted
as curiosities; but with much error and jargon, they contain many
shrewd remarks, and curious speculations.”

How little would any reader suppose from this account of them, or
indeed from any thing which Dr. Aikin has said concerning this once
celebrated person, that Van Helmont might as fitly be classed among
enthusiasts as among physicians, and with philosophers as with
either; and that like most enthusiasts it is sometimes not easy to
determine whether he was deceived himself or intended to deceive
others.

He was born at Brussels in the year 1577, and of noble family. In his
Treatise entitled Tumulus Pestis (to which strange title a stranger1
explanation is annexed) he gives a sketch of his own history, saying,
“imitemini, si quid forte boni in eâ occurrerit.” He was a devourer of
books, and digested into common places for his own use, whatever
he thought most remarkable in them, so that few exceeded him in
diligence, but most, he says, in judgement. At the age of seventeen,
he was appointed by the Professors Thomas Fyenus, Gerard de
Velleers, and Stornius, to read surgical lectures in the Medical
College at Louvain. Eheu, he exclaims, præsumsi docere, quæ ipse
nesciebam! and his presumption was increased because the
Professors of their own accord appointed him to this Lectureship,
attended to hear him, and were the Censors of what he delivered.
The writers from whom he compiled his discourses were Holerius,
Tagaultius, Guido, Vigo, Ægineta, and “the whole tribe of Arabian
authors.” But then he began, and in good time, to marvel at his own
temerity and inconsiderateness in thinking that by mere reading, he
could be qualified to teach what could be learnt only by seeing, and
by operating, and by long practice, and by careful observation: and
this distrust in himself was increased when he discovered that the
Professors could give him no further light than books had done.
However at the age of twenty-two he was created Doctor of
Medicine in the same University.
 1 Lector, titulus quem legis, terror lugubris, foribus affixus,
intus mortem, mortis genus, et hominum
nunciat flagrum. Sta, et inquire, quid hoc?
Mirare. Quid sibi vult
Tumuli Epigraphe Pestis?
Sub anatome abii, non obii; quamdiu malesuada invidia
Momi, et hominum ignara cupido,
me fovebunt.
Ergo heic
Non funus, non cadaver, non mors, non sceleton
non luctus, non contagium.
ÆTERNO DA GLORIAM
Quod Pestis jam desiit, sub Anatomes proprio supplicio.

Very soon he began to repent that he, who was by birth noble,
should have been the first of his family to choose the medical
profession, and this against the will of his mother, and without the
knowledge of his other relations. “I lamented, he says, with tears
the sin of my disobedience, and regretted the time and labour which
had been thus vainly expended: and often with a sorrowful heart I
intreated the Lord that he would be pleased to lead me to a vocation
not of my own choice, but in which I might best perform his will;
and I made a vow that to whatever way of life he might call me, I
would follow it, and do my utmost endeavour therein to serve him.
Then, as if I had tasted of the forbidden fruit, I discovered my own
nakedness. I saw that there was neither truth nor knowledge in my
putative learning; and thought it cruel to derive money from the
sufferings of others; and unfitting that an art founded upon charity,
and conferred upon the condition of exercising compassion, should
be converted into a means of lucre.”

These reflections were promoted if not induced by his having caught

a disorder which as it is not mentionable in polite circles, may be
described by intimating that the symptom from which it derives its
name is alleviated by what Johnson defines tearing or rubbing with
the nails. It was communicated to him by a young lady's glove, into
which in a evil minute of sportive gallantry he had insinuated his
hand. The physicians treated him, secundum artem, in entire
ignorance of the disease; they bled him to cool the liver, and they
purged him to carry off the torrid choler and the salt phlegm, they
repeated this clearance again and again, till from a hale strong and
active man they had reduced him to extreme leanness and debility
without in the slightest degree abating the cutaneous disease. He
then persuaded himself that the humours which the Galenists were
so triumphantly expelling from his poor carcase had not preexisted
there in that state but were produced by the action of their drugs.
Some one cured him easily by brimstone, and this is said to have
made him feelingly perceive the inefficiency of the scholastic practice
which he had hitherto pursued.

In this state of mind he made over his inheritance to a widowed

sister, who stood in need of it, gave up his profession, and left his
own country with an intention of never returning to it. The world
was all before him, and he began his travels with as little fore-
knowledge whither he was going, and as little fore-thought of what
he should do, as Adam himself when the gate of Paradise was closed
upon him; but he went with the hope that God would direct his
course by His good pleasure to some good end. It so happened that
he who had renounced the profession of medicine as founded on
delusion and imposture was thrown into the way of practising it, by
falling in company with a man who had no learning, but who
understood the practical part of chemistry, or pyrotechny, as he calls
it. The new world which Columbus discovered did not open a wider
or more alluring field to ambition and rapacity than this science
presented to Van Helmont's enthusiastic and enquiring mind. “Then”
says he, “when by means of fire I beheld the penetrale, the inward
or secret part of certain bodies, I comprehended the separations of
many, which were not then taught in books, and some of which are
still unknown.” He pursued his experiments with increasing ardour,
and in the course of two years acquired such reputation by the cures
which he performed, that because of his reputation he was sent for
by the Elector of Cologne. Then indeed he became more ashamed of
his late and learned ignorance, and renouncing all books because
they sung only the same cuckoo note, perceived that he profited
more by fire, and by conceptions acquired in praying. “And then,”
says he, “I clearly knew that I had missed the entrance of true
philosophy, on all sides obstacles and obscurities and difficulties
appeared, which neither labour, nor time, nor vigils, nor expenditure
of money could overcome and disperse, but only the mere goodness
of God. Neither women, nor social meetings deprived me then of
even a single hour, but continual labour and watching were the
thieves of my time; for I willingly cured the poor and those of mean
estate, being more moved by human compassion, and a moral love
of giving, than by pure universal charity reflected in the Fountain of
Life.”

INTERCHAPTER XX.

ST. PANTALEON OF NICOMEDIA IN BITHYNIA—HIS HISTORY, AND SOME FURTHER

PARTICULARS NOT TO BE FOUND ELSEWHERE.

Non dicea le cose senza il quia;

Che il dritto distingueva dal mancino,
E dicea pane al pane, e vino al vino.
BERTOLDO.

This Interchapter is dedicated to St. Pantaleon, of Nicomedia in

Bithynia, student in medicine and practitioner in miracles, whose
martyrdom is commemorated by the Church of Rome, on the 27th of
July.

Sancte Pantaleon, ora pro nobis!

This I say to be on the safe side; though between ourselves reader,

Nicephorus, and Usuardus, and Vincentius and St. Antoninus
(notwithstanding his sanctity) have written so many lies concerning
him, that it is very doubtful whether there ever was such a person,
and still more doubtful whether there be such a Saint. However the
body which is venerated under his name, is just as venerable as if it
had really belonged to him, and works miracles as well.

It is a tradition in Corsica that when St. Pantaleon was beheaded,

the executioner's sword was converted into a wax taper, and the
weapons of all his attendants into snuffers, and that the head rose
from the block and sung. In honour of this miracle the Corsicans as
late as the year 1775 used to have their swords consecrated, or
charmed,—by laying them on the altar while a mass was performed
to St. Pantaleon.

But what have I, who am writing in January instead of July, and who
am no papist, and who have the happiness of living in a protestant
country, and was baptized moreover by a right old English name,—
what have I to do with St. Pantaleon? Simply this, my new
pantaloons are just come home, and that they derive their name
from the aforesaid Saint is as certain,—as that it was high time I
should have a new pair.

St. Pantaleon though the tutelary Saint of Oporto (which city

boasteth of his relics) was in more especial fashion at Venice: and so
many of the grave Venetians were in consequence named after him,
that the other Italians called them generally Pantaloni in derision,—
as an Irishman is called Pat, and as Sawney is with us synonymous
with Scotchman, or Taffy for a son of Cadwallader and votary of St.
David and his leek. Now the Venetians wore long small clothes;
these as being the national dress were called Pantaloni also; and
when the trunk-hose of Elizabeth's days went out of fashion, we
received them from France, with the name of pantaloons.

Pantaloons then as of Venetian and Magnifico parentage, and under

the patronage of an eminent Saint, are doubtless an honourable
garb. They are also of honourable extraction, being clearly of the
Braccæ family. For it is this part of our dress by which we are more
particularly distinguished from the Oriental and inferior nations and
also from the abominable Romans whom our ancestors, Heaven be
praised! subdued. Under the miserable reign of Honorius and
Arcadius, these Lords of the World thought proper to expel the
Braccarii, or breeches-makers, from their capitals, and to prohibit the
use of this garment, thinking it a thing unworthy that the Romans
should wear the habit of Barbarians:—and truly it was not fit that so
effeminate a race should wear the breeches.

The Pantaloons are of this good Gothic family. The fashion having
been disused for more than a century was re-introduced some five
and twenty years ago, and still prevails so much—that I who like to
go with the stream, and am therefore content to have fashions
thrust upon me, have just received a new pair from London.

The coming of a box from the Great City is an event which is always
looked to by the juveniles of this family with some degree of
impatience. In the present case there was especial cause for such
joyful expectation, for the package was to contain no less a treasure
than the story of the Lioness and the Exeter Mail, with appropriate
engravings representing the whole of that remarkable history, and
those engravings emblazoned in appropriate colours. This adventure
had excited an extraordinary degree of interest among us when it
was related in the newspapers: and no sooner had a book upon the
subject been advertised, than the young ones one and all were in an
uproar, and tumultuously petitioned that I would send for it,—to
which, thinking the prayer of the petitioners reasonable, I graciously
assented. And moreover there was expected among other things
ejusdem generis, one of those very few perquisites which the all-
annihilating hand of Modern Reform has not retrenched in our public
offices,—an Almanac or Pocket-Book for the year, curiously bound
and gilt, three only being made up in this magnificent manner for
three magnificent personages, from one of whom this was a present
to my lawful Governess. Poor Mr. Bankes! the very hairs of his wig
will stand erect,

Like quills upon the fretful porcupine,

when he reads of this flagrant misapplication of public money; and

Mr. Whitbread would have founded a motion upon it, had he
survived the battle of Waterloo.

There are few things in which so many vexatious delays are

continually occurring, and so many rascally frauds are systematically
practised, as in the carriage of parcels. It is indeed much to be
wished that Government could take into its hands the conveyance of
goods as well as letters, for in this country whatever is done by
Government is done punctually and honourably;—what corruption
there is lies among the people themselves, among whom honesty is
certainly less general than it was half a century ago. Three or four
days elapsed on each of which the box ought to have arrived. Will it
come to day Papa? was the morning question: why does not it
come? was the complaint at noon; and when will it come? was the
query at night. But in childhood the delay of hope is only the
prolongation of enjoyment; and through life indeed, hope if it be of
the right kind, is the best food of happiness. “The House of Hope,”
says Hafiz, “is built upon a weak foundation.” If it be so, I say, the
fault is in the builder: Build it upon a Rock, and it will stand.

Expectata dies,—long looked for, at length it came. The box was

brought into the parlour, the ripping-chissel was produced, the nails
were easily forced, the cover was lifted, and the paper which lay
beneath it was removed. There's the pantaloons! was the first
exclamation. The clothes being taken out, there appeared below a
paper parcel, secured with string. As I never encourage any undue
impatience, the string was deliberately and carefully untied. Behold,
the splendid Pocket-Book, and the history of the Lioness and the
Exeter Mail,—had been forgotten!

O St. Peter! St. Peter!

“Pray, Sir,” says the Reader, “as I perceive you are a person who
have a reason for every thing you say, may I ask wherefore you call
upon St. Peter on this occasion.”

You may Sir.

A reason there is and a valid one. But what that reason is, I shall
leave the commentators to discover; observing only, for the sake of
lessening their difficulty, that the Peter upon whom I have called is
not St. Peter of Verona, he having been an Inquisitor, one of the
Devil's Saints, and therefore in no condition at this time to help any
body who invokes him.

“Well Papa, you must write about them, and they must come in the
next parcel,” said the children. Job never behaved better, who was a
scriptural Epictetus; nor Epictetus who was a heathen Job.

I kissed the little philosophers; and gave them the Bellman's verses,
which happened to come in the box, with horrific cuts of the
Marriage at Cana, the Ascension and other portions of gospel
history, and the Bellman himself,—so it was not altogether a blank.
We agreed that the disappointment should be an adjourned
pleasure, and then I turned to inspect the pantaloons.

I cannot approve the colour. It hath too much of the purple; not that
imperial die by which ranks were discriminated at Constantinople,
nor the more sober tint which Episcopacy affecteth. Nor is it the
bloom of the plum;—still less can it be said to resemble the purple
light of love. No! it is rather a hue brushed from the raven's wing, a
black purple; not Night and Aurora meeting, which would make the
darkness blush; but Erebus and Ultramarine.

Doubtless it hath been selected for me because of its alamodality,—a

good and pregnant word, on the fitness of which some German
whose name appears to be erroneously as well as uncouthly written
Geamoenus, is said to have composed a dissertation. Be pleased Mr.
Todd to insert it in the interleaved copy of your dictionary!

Thankful I am that they are not like Jean de Bart's full dress
breeches; for when that famous sailor went to court he is said to
have worn breeches of cloth of gold, most uncomfortably as well as
splendidly lined with cloth of silver.

He would never have worn them had he read Lampridius, and seen
the opinion of the Emperor Alexander Severus as by that historian
recorded: “in lineâ autem aurum mitti etiam dementiam judicabat,
cum asperitati adderetur rigor.”

The word breeches has, I am well aware, been deemed ineffable,

and therefore not to be written—because not to be read. But I am
encouraged to use it by the high and mighty authority of the Anti-
Jacobin Review. Mr. Stephens having in his Memoirs of Horne Tooke
used the word small-clothes is thus reprehended for it by the
indignant Censor.

“His breeches he calls small-clothes;—the first time we have seen

this bastard term, the offspring of gross ideas and disgusting
affectation in print, in any thing like a book. It is scandalous to see
men of education thus employing the most vulgar language, and
corrupting their native tongue by the introduction of illegitimate
words. But this is the age of affectation. Even our fishwomen and
milkmaids affect to blush at the only word which can express this
part of a man's dress, and lisp small-clothes with as many airs as a
would-be woman of fashion is accustomed to display. That this folly
is indebted for its birth to grossness of imagination in those who
evince it, will not admit of a doubt. From the same source arises the
ridiculous and too frequent use of a French word for a part of female
dress; as if the mere change of language could operate a change
either in the thing expressed, or in the idea annexed to the
expression! Surely, surely, English women, who are justly celebrated
for good sense and decorous manners, should rise superior to such
pityful, such paltry, such low-minded affectation.”

Here I must observe that one of these redoubtable critics is thought

to have a partiality for breeches of the Dutch make. It is said also
that he likes to cut them out for himself, and to have pockets of
capacious size, wide and deep; and a large fob, and a large
allowance of lining.

The Critic who so very much dislikes the word small-clothes, and
argues so vehemently in behalf of breeches, uses no doubt that
edition of the scriptures that is known by the name of the Breeches
Bible.1
1 The Bible here alluded to was the Genevan one, by Rowland Hall, A.D. 1560. It was
for many years the most popular one in England, and the notes were great favorites
with the religious public, insomuch so that they were attached to a copy of King
James' Translation as late as 1715. From the peculiar rendering of Genesis, iii. 7, the
Editions of this translation have been commonly known by the name of “Breeches
Bibles.”—See Cotton's Various Editions of the Bible, p. 14, and Ames and Herbert, Ed.
Dibdin, vol. iv. p. 410.

I ought to be grateful to the Anti-Jacobin Review. It assists in

teaching me my duty to my neighbour, and enabling me to live in
charity with all men. For I might perhaps think that nothing could be
so wrong-headed as Leigh Hunt, so wrong-hearted as Cobbett, so
foolish as one, so blackguard as the other, so impudently conceited
as both,—if it were not for the Anti-Jacobin. I might believe that
nothing could be so bad as the coarse, bloody and brutal spirit of the
vulgar Jacobin,—if it were not for the Anti-Jacobin.
Blessings on the man for his love of pure English! It is to be
expected that he will make great progress in it, through his
familiarity with fishwomen and milk-maids; for it implies no common
degree of familiarity with those interesting classes to talk to them
about breeches, and discover that they prefer to call them small-
clothes.

But wherefore did he not instruct us by which monosyllable he would

express the female garment, “which is indeed the sister to a shirt,”—
as an old poet says, and which he hath left unnamed,—for there are
two by which it is denominated. Such a discussion would be worthy
both of his good sense, and his decorous stile.

For my part, instead of expelling the word chemise from use I would
have it fairly naturalized.

Many plans have been proposed for reducing our orthography to

some regular system, and improving our language in various ways.
Mr. Elphinstone, Mr. Pinkerton, and Mr. Spence, the founder of the
Spensean Philanthropists, have distinguished themselves in these
useful and patriotic projects, and Mr. Pytches is at present in like
manner laudably employed,—though that gentleman contents
himself with reforming what these bolder spirits would revolutionize.
I also would fain contribute to so desirable an end.

We agree that in spelling words it is proper to discard all reference

to their etymology. The political reformer would confine the attention
of the Government exclusively to what are called truly British
objects; and the philological reformers in like manner are desirous of
establishing a truly British language.

Upon this principle, I would anglicize the orthography of chemise;

and by improving upon the hint which the word would then offer in
its English appearance, we might introduce into our language a
distinction of genders—in which it has hitherto been defective. For
example,
 Hemise and Shemise.

Here without the use of an article, or any change of termination we

have the needful distinction made more perspicuously than by ó and
ń, hic and hæc, le and la, or other articles serving for no other
purpose.

Again. In letter-writing, every person knows that male and female

letters have a distinct sexual character, they should therefore be
generally distinguished thus,

Hepistle and Shepistle.

And as there is the same marked difference in the writing of the two
sexes I would propose

Penmanship and Penwomanship.

Erroneous opinions in religion being promulgated in this country by

women as well as men, the teachers of such false doctrines may be
divided into

Heresiarchs and Sheresiarchs,

so that we should speak of

the Heresy of the Quakers

the Sheresy of Joanna Southcote's people.

The troublesome affection of the diaphragm, which every person has

experienced, is upon the same principle to be called according to the
sex of the patient

Hecups or Shecups,

which upon the principle of making our language truly British is

better than the more classical form of
 Hiccups and Hæccups.

In its objective use the word becomes

Hiscups or Hercups,

and in like manner Histerics should be altered into Herterics, the

complaint never being masculine.

So also instead of making such words as agreeable, comfortable, &c.

adjectives of one termination, I would propose,

Masculine agreabeau, Feminine agreabelle

comfortabeau comfortabelle
miserabeau miserabelle,
&c. &c.

These things are suggested as hints to Mr. Pytches, to be by him

perpended in his improvement of our Dictionary. I beg leave also to
point out for his critical notice the remarkable difference in the
meaning of the word misfortune, as applied to man, woman, or
child: a peculiarity for which perhaps no parallel is to be found in any
other language.

But to return from these philological speculations to the Anti-Jacobin

by whom we have been led to them, how is it that this critic, great
master as he is of the vulgar tongue, should affirm that breeches is
the only word by which this part of a man's dress can be expressed.
Had he forgotten that there was such a word as galligaskins?—to say
nothing of inexpressibles and dont-mention 'ems. Why also did he
forget pantaloons?—and thus the Chapter like a rondeau comes
round to St. Pantaleon with whom it began,

Sancte Pantaleon, ora pro nobis!

“Here is another Chapter without a heading,”—the Compositor would
have said when he came to this part of the Manuscript, if he had not
seen at a glance, that in my great consideration I had said it for him.

Yes, Mr. Compositor! Because of the matter whereon it has to treat,

we must, if you please, entitle this an

ARCH-CHAPTER.

A Frenchman once, who was not ashamed of appearing ignorant on

such a subject, asked another who with some reputation for classical
attainments had not the same rare virtue, what was the difference
between Dryads and Hamadryads; and the man of erudition gravely
replied that it was much the same as that between Bishops and
Archbishops.

I have dignified this Arch-Chapter in its designation, because it

relates to the King.

Dr. Gooch, you are hereby requested to order this book for his
Majesty's library,

C'est une rare pièce, et digne sur ma foi,

Qu'on en fasse présent au cabinet d'un roi.1

1 MOLIERE.

Dr. Gooch I have a great respect for you. At the time when there
was an intention of bringing a bill into Parliament for emancipating
the Plague from the Quarantine Laws, and allowing to the people of
Great Britain their long withheld right of having this disease as freely
as the small pox, measles and any other infectious malady, you
wrote a paper and published it in the Quarterly Review, against that
insane intention; proving its insanity so fully by matter of fact, and
so conclusively by force of reasoning, that your arguments carried
conviction with them, and put an end, for the time, to that part of
the emancipating and free trade system.

Dr. Gooch, you have also written a volume of medical treatises of

which I cannot speak more highly than by saying, sure I am that if
the excellent subject of these my reminiscences were living, he
would, for his admiration of those treatises have solicited the
pleasure and honour of your acquaintance.

Dr. Gooch, comply with this humble request of a sincere, though

unknown admirer, for the sake of your departed brother-in-physic,
who, like yourself, brought to the study of the healing art, a fertile
mind, a searching intellect and a benevolent heart. More, Dr. G. I
might say, and more I would say, but—

Should I say more, you well might censure me

(What yet I never was) a flatterer.2

2 BEAUMONT AND FLETCHER.

When the King (God bless his Majesty!) shall peruse this book and
be well-pleased therewith, if it should enter into his royal mind to
call for his Librarian, and ask of him what honour and dignity hath
been done to the author of it, for having delighted the heart of the
King, and of so many of his liege subjects, and you shall have replied
unto his Majesty, “there is nothing done for him;” then Dr. Gooch
when the King shall take it into consideration how to testify his
satisfaction with the book, and to manifest his bounty toward the
author, you are requested to bear in mind my thoughts upon this
weighty matter, of which I shall now proceed to put you in
possession.

Should he generously think of conferring upon me the honour of

knighthood, or a baronetcy, or a peerage, (Lord Doncaster the title,)
or a step in the peerage, according to my station in life, of which you
Dr. Gooch can give him no information; or should he meditate the
institution of an Order of Merit for men of letters, with an intention
of nominating me among the original members, worthy as such
intentions would be of his royal goodness, I should nevertheless, for
reasons which it is not necessary to explain, deem it prudent to
decline any of these honours.

Far be it from me, Dr. Gooch, to wish that the royal apparel should
be brought which the King useth to wear, and the horse that the
King rideth upon, and the crown royal which is set upon his head;
and that this apparel and horse should be delivered to the hand of
one of the King's most noble princes, that he might array me withal;
and bring me on horseback through the streets of London, and
proclaim before me, thus shall it be done to the man whom the King
delighteth to honour! Such an exhibition would neither accord with
this age, nor with the manners of this nation, nor with my humility.

As little should I desire that his Majesty should give orders for me to
be clothed in purple, to drink in gold and to sleep upon gold, and to
ride in a chariot with bridles of gold, and to have an head-tire of fine
linen, and a chain about my neck, and to eat next the King, because
of my wisdom, and to be called the King's cousin. For purple
garments, Dr. Gooch are not among the propria quæ maribus in
England at this time; it is better to drink in glass than in gold, and to
sleep upon a feather bed than upon a golden one; the only head-tire
which I wear is my night-cap, I care not therefore for the fineness of
its materials; and I dislike for myself chains of any kind.

That his Majesty should think of sending for me to sit next him
because of my wisdom, is what he in his wisdom will not do, and
what, if he were to do, would not be agreeable to me, in mine. But
should the King desire to have me called his Cousin, accompanying
that of course with such an appanage as would be seemly for its
support, and should he notify that most gracious intention to you his
Librarian, and give order that it should be by you inserted in the
Gazette,—to the end that the secret which assuredly no sagacity can
divine, and no indiscretion will betray, should incontinently
thereupon be communicated through you to the royal ear; and that
in future editions of this work, the name of the thus honoured
author should appear with the illustrious designation, in golden
letters of, “by special command of his Majesty,

COUSIN TO THE KING.”

A gracious mandate of this nature, Dr. Gooch, would require a

severe sacrifice from my loyal and dutiful obedience. Not that the
respectful deference which is due to the royal and noble house of
Gloucester should withhold me from accepting the proffered honour:
to that house it could be nothing derogatory; the value of their
consanguinity would rather be the more manifest, when the
designation alone, unaccompanied with rank, was thus rendered by
special command purely and singularly honourable. Still less should I
be influenced by any apprehension of being confounded in
cousinship with Olive, calling herself Princess of Cumberland.
Nevertheless let me say, Dr. Gooch, while I am free to say it,—while
I am treating of it paulo-post-futuratively, as of a possible case, not
as a question brought before me for my prompt and irrevocable
answer,—let me humbly say that I prefer the incognito even to this
title. It is not necessary, and would not be proper to enter into my
reasons for that preference; suffice it that it is my humour (speaking
be it observed respectfully, and using that word in its critical and
finer sense), that it is the idiosyncrasy of my disposition, the familiar
way in which it pleases me innocently to exercise my privilege of
free will. It is not a secret which every body knows, which nobody
could help knowing and which was the more notoriously known
because of its presumed secresy. Incognito I am and wish to be, and
incognoscible it is in my power to remain:

He deserves small trust,

Who is not privy councillor to himself,
but my secret, (being my own) is, like my life (if that were needed)
at the King's service, and at his alone;

Τοῖς κυρίοις γὰρ πάντα χρὴ δηλοῦν λόγον.3

3 SOPHOCLES.

Be pleased therefore Dr. Gooch, if his Majesty most graciously and

most considerately should ask, what may be done for the man (—
meaning me,—) whom the King delighteth to honour;—be pleased,
good Dr. Gooch, to represent that the allowance which is usually
granted to a retired Envoy, would content his wishes, make his
fortunes easy, and gladden his heart;—(Dr. Gooch you will forgive
the liberty thus taken with you!)—that “where the word of a King is,
there is power,”—that an ostensible reason for granting it may easily
be found, a sealed communication from the unknown being made
through your hands;—that many Envoys have not deserved it better,
and many secret services which have been as largely rewarded have
not afforded to the King so much satisfaction;—finally that this
instance of royal bounty will not have the effect of directing public
suspicion toward the object of that bounty, nor be likely to be barked
at by Joseph Hume, Colonel Davies, and Daniel Whittle Harvey!

CHAPTER CLXXXVIII.

FOLLY IN PRINT, REFERRED TO, BUT (N.B.) NOT EXEMPLIFIED. THE FAIR MAID OF
DONCASTER. DOUBTS CONCERNING THE AUTHENTICITY OF HER STORY.
THEVENARD, AND LOVE ON A NEW FOOTING. STARS AND GARTERS, A MONITORY
ANECDOTE FOR OUR SEX, AND A WHOLESOME NOVELTY IN DRESS RECOMMENDED
TO BOTH.
 They be at hand, Sir, with stick and fiddle,
They can play a new dance, Sir, called hey, diddle, diddle.
KING CAMBYSES.

You have in the earlier chapters of this Opus, gentle Reader, heard
much of the musical history of Doncaster; not indeed as it would
have been related by that thoroughly good, fine-ear'd, kind-hearted,
open-handed, happiest of musicians and men, Dr. Burney the first;
and yet I hope thou mayest have found something in this relation
which has been to thy pleasure in reading, and which, if it should be
little to thy profit in remembrance, will be nothing to thy hurt. From
music to dancing is an easy transition, but do not be afraid that I
shall take thee to a Ball,—for I would rather go to the Treading Mill
myself.

What I have to say of Doncaster dancing relates to times long before

those to which my reminiscences belong.

In a collection of Poems entitled “Folly in Print”—(which title might

be sufficiently appropriate for many such collections)—or a Book of
Rhymes, printed in 1667, there is a Ballad called the Northern Lass,
or the Fair Maid of Doncaster. Neither book or ballad has ever fallen
in my way, nor has that comedy of Richard Broome's, which from its
name Oldys supposed to have been founded upon the same story. I
learn however in a recent and voluminous account of the English
Stage from the Revolution (by a gentleman profoundly learned in the
most worthless of all literature, and for whom that literature seems
to have been quite good enough,) that Broome's play has no
connection with the ballad, or with Doncaster. But the note in which
Oldys mentions it has made me acquainted with this Fair Maid's
propensity for dancing, and with the consequences that it brought
upon her. Her name was Betty Maddox; a modern ballad writer
would call her Elizabeth, if he adopted the style of the Elizabethan
age; or Eliza if his taste inclined to the refinements of modern
euphony. When an hundred horsemen wooed her, says Oldys, she
conditioned that she would marry the one of them who could dance
her down;

You shall decide your quarrel by a dance,1

but she wearied them all; and they left her a maid for her pains.

Legiadria suos fervabat tanta per artus,

Ut quæcunque potest fieri saltatio per nos
Humanos, agili motu fiebat ab illâ.2

1 DRYDEN.

2 MACARONICA.

At that dancing match they must have footed it till, as is said in an

old Comedy, a good country lass's capermonger might have been
able to copy the figure of the dance from the impressions on the
pavement.

For my own part I do not believe it to be a true story; they who

please may. Was there one of the horsemen but would have said on
such occasion, with the dancing Peruvians in one of Davenant's
operatic dramas,

Still round and round and round,

Let us compass the ground.
What man is he who feels
Any weight at his heels,
Since our hearts are so light, that, all weigh'd together,
Agree to a grain, and they weigh not a feather.

I disbelieve it altogether, and not for its want of verisimilitude alone,

but because when I was young there was no tradition of any such
thing in the town where the venue of the action is laid; and
therefore I conjecture that it is altogether a fictitious story, and may
peradventure have been composed as a lesson for some young
spinster whose indefatigable feet made her the terror of all partners.

The Welsh have a saying that if a woman were as quick with her
feet as her tongue, she would catch lightning enough to kindle the
fire in the morning; it is a fanciful saying, as many of the Welsh
sayings are. But if Miss Maddox had been as quick with her tongue
as her feet, instead of dancing an hundred horsemen down, she
might have talked their hundred horses to death.

Why it was a greater feat than that of Kempe the actor, who in the
age of odd performance danced from London to Norwich. He was
nine days in dancing the journey and published an account of it
under the title of his “Nine Day's Wonder.”3 It could have been no
“light fantastic toe” that went through such work; but one fit for the
roughest game at football. At sight of the aweful foot to which it
belonged, Cupid would have fled with as much reason as the Dragon
of Wantley had for turning tail when Moor of Moor Hall with his
spiked shoe-armour pursued him. He would have fled before
marriage, for fear of being kicked out of the house after it. They
must have been feet that instead of gliding and swimming, and
treading the grass so trim, went as the old Comedy says lumperdee,
clumperdee.4
3 Webster's Westward Ho. Act. v. Sc. i.—Anno 1600.

4 RALPH ROISTER DOISTER.

The Northern Lass was in this respect no Cinderella. Nor would any
one, short of an Irish Giant have fallen in love with her slipper, as
Thevenard the singer did with that which he saw by accident at a
shoe-maker's, and enquiring for what enchanting person it was
made, and judging of this earthly Venus as the proportions of
Hercules have been estimated ex pede, sought her out, for love of
her foot, commenced his addresses to her, and obtained her hand in
marriage.

The story of Thevenard is true, at least it has been related and

received as such; this of the Fair Maid of Doncaster is not even ben
trovato. Who indeed shall persuade me, or who indeed will be
persuaded, that if she had wished to drop the title of spinster and
take her matrimonial degree, she would not have found some good
excuse for putting an end to the dance when she had found a
partner to her liking? A little of that wit which seldom fails a woman
when it is needed, would have taught her how to do this with a
grace, and make it appear that she was still an invincible dancer,
though the Stars had decreed that in this instance she should lose
the honour of the dance. Some accident might have been feigned
like those by which the ancient epic poets, and their imitators
contrive in their Games to disappoint those who are on the point of
gaining the prize which is contended for.

If the Stars had favoured her, they might have predestined her to
meet with such an accident as befel a young lady in the age of
minuets. She was led out in a large assembly by her partner, the
object of all eyes; and when the music began and the dance should
have began also, and he was in motion, she found herself unable to
move from the spot, she remained motionless for a few seconds, her
colour changed from rose to ruby, presently she seemed about to
faint, fell into the arms of those who ran to support her, and was
carried out of the room. The fit may have been real, for though
nothing ailed her, yet what had happened was enough to make any
young woman faint in such a place. It was something far more
embarrassing than the mishap against which Soame Jenyns cautions
the ladies when he says,
 No waving lappets should the dancing fair,
Nor ruffles edged with dangling fringes wear;
Oft will the cobweb ornaments catch hold
On the approaching button, rough with gold;
Nor force nor art can then the bonds divide
When once the entangled Gordian knot is tied.
So the unhappy pair, by Hymen's power
Together joined in some ill-fated hour,
The more they strive their freedom to regain,
The faster binds the indissoluble chain.

It was worse than this in the position in which she had placed
herself according to rule, for beginning the minuet, she was fastened
not by a spell, not by the influence of her malignant Stars, but by
the hooks and eyes of her garters. The Countess of Salisbury's
misfortune was as much less embarrassing as it was more
celebrated.

No such misfortunes could have happened to that Countess who has

been rendered illustrious thereby, nor to the once fair danceress,
who would have dreaded nothing more than that her ridiculous
distress should become publicly known, if they had worn
genouillères, that is to say, knee-pieces. A necessary part of a suit of
armour was distinguished by this name in the days of chivalry; and
the article of dress which corresponds to it may be called kneelets, if
for a new article we strike a new word in that mint of analogy, from
which whatever is lawfully coined comes forth as the King's English.
Dress and cookery are both great means of civilization, indeed they
are among the greatest; both in their abuse are made subservient to
luxury and extravagance, and so become productive of great evils,
moral and physical; and with regard to both the physician may
sometimes interfere with effect, when the moralist would fail. In diet
the physician has more frequently to oppose the inclinations of his
patient, than to gratify them; and it is not often that his advice in
matters of dress meets with willing ears, although in these things
the maxim will generally hold good, that whatever is wholesome is
comfortable, and that whatever causes discomfort or uneasiness is
more or less injurious to health. But he may recommend kneelets
without having any objection raised on the score of fashion, or of
vanity; and old and young may be thankful for the recommendation.
Mr. Ready-to-halt would have found that they supported his weak
joints and rendered him less liable to rheumatic attacks; and his
daughter Much-afraid, if she had worn them when she “footed it
handsomely,” might have danced without any fear of such accidents
as happened to the Countess of old, or the heroine of the minuet in
later times.

Begin therefore forthwith, dear Lady-readers, to knit genouillères for

yourselves, and for those whom you love. You will like them better I
know by their French name, though English comes best from English
lips; but so you knit and wear them, call them what you will.

CHAPTER CLXXXIX.

THE DOCTOR'S OPINION OF LATE HOURS. DANCING. FANATICAL OBJECTION OF

THE ALBIGENSES; INJURIOUS EFFECT OF THAT OPINION WHEN TRANSMITTED TO
THE FRENCH PROTESTANTS. SIR JOHN DAVIES AND BURTON QUOTED TO SHOW
THAT IT CAN BE NO DISPARAGEMENT TO SAY THAT ALL THE WORLD'S A STAGE,
WHEN ALL THE SKY'S A BALL-ROOM.
 I could be pleased with any one
Who entertained my sight with such gay shows,
As men and women moving here and there,
That coursing one another in their steps
Have made their feet a tune.
DRYDEN.

The Doctor was no dancer. He had no inclination for this pastime

even in what the song calls “our dancing days,” partly because his
activity lay more in his head than in his heels, and partly perhaps
from an apprehension of awkwardness, the consequence of his
rustic breeding. In middle and later life he had strong professional
objections, not to the act of dancing, but to the crowded and heated
rooms wherein it was carried on, and to the late hours to which it
was continued. In such rooms and at such assemblies, the Devil, as
an old dramatist says, “takes delight to hang at a woman's girdle,
like a rusty watch, that she cannot discern how the time passes.”1
Bishop Hall in our friend's opinion spake wisely when drawing an
ideal picture of the Christian, he said of him, “in a due season he
betakes himself to his rest. He presumes not to alter the ordinance
of day and night; nor dares confound, where distinctions are made
by his Maker.”
1 WEBSTER.

Concerning late hours indeed he was much of the same opinion as

the man in the old play who thought that “if any thing was to be
damned, it would be Twelve o'clock at night.”

These should be hours for necessities,

Not for delights; times to repair our nature
With comforting repose, and not for us
To waste these times.2
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