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FOUNDATIONS

The 7 Habits of Highly

Effective People ®

An Introductory Work Session

 P

FOUNDATIONS

The Proven Personal-Leadership System

Based on Timeless Principles of Effectiveness

Name
IMPORTANT NOTICE
Copyright © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.
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ABOUT FRANKLINCOVEY
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Introduction
Paradigms and Principles of Effectiveness

HOW CAN I BECOME MORE EFFECTIVE?

• Move from dependence to interdependence.
• Assess your paradigms.
PARADIGMS AND PRINCIPLES OF EFFECTIVENESS

How Can I Become More Effective?

When you practice the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, you will be able to
lead your life in a truly effective way. The habits build upon one another, creating a
process of self-awareness, growth, and development.

MOVE FROM DEPENDENCE TO INTERDEPENDENCE

1

ASSESS YOUR PARADIGMS.

2

People who are effective have effective habits. Habits are patterns of behavior. They
are daily expressions of your character. Your habits can produce effective results—
or not. As people become more effective, they also grow and develop to become
interdependent—they work well with others.

EFFECTIVENESS IS GETTING THE RESULTS

YOU WANT OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

2 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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The 7 Habits Promise

By living the 7 Habits, you will become profoundly more effective in the things that
matter most to you.

List some areas where you’d like to become more effective:

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

If you apply even one of the 7 Habits today, you

can see immediate results; but it’s a lifetime
achievement—a life promise.
- Stephen R. Covey

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 3

PARADIGMS AND PRINCIPLES OF EFFECTIVENESS

Move From Dependence

to Interdependence
The Maturity Continuum is the framework for effectiveness. First, you learn to lead
yourself by practicing Habits 1, 2, and 3. Then, you learn to be more effective with
others—Habits 4, 5, and 6. Habit 7 is the habit that makes all the others possible. As
you practice the 7 Habits, you will move from dependence to interdependence.

MATURITY CONTINUUM

Habi
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INTERDEPENDENCE
SA
Habit 5 W
SEEK FIRST TO
UNDERSTAND, THEN TO
Habit 6
BE UNDERSTOOD SYNERGIZE
PUBLIC VICTORY

Habit 4
THINK WIN-WIN

INDEPENDENCE

Habit 3
PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

PRIVATE VICTORY
Habit 1 Habit 2
BE PROACTIVE BEGIN WITH THE
END IN MIND

DEPENDENCE

4 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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Stages of Maturity
Identify below the behaviors you observe at each level of maturity in your
workplace. Then determine the results (positive and/or negative) people get from
using those behaviors.

INTERDEPENDENCE

Behaviors __________________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________________________

Results _____________________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________________________

INDEPENDENCE

Behaviors __________________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________________________

Results _____________________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________________________

DEPENDENCE

Behaviors __________________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________________________

Results ____________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 5

PARADIGMS AND PRINCIPLES OF EFFECTIVENESS

Assess Your Paradigms

A paradigm is how you see and understand the world. It’s a mental map. If you
want effective results, practice effective habits. If you want to practice effective
habits, adopt paradigms based on principles of effectiveness.

SEE-DO-GET CYCLE

PARADIGMS

SEE

PRINCIPLES
OF EFFECTIVENESS
T
GE

DO

RESULTS PRACTICES

6 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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What Are Your Paradigms?

PARADIGM:
How you see and
understand the
world—a mental map.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

If you want to make minor changes in your life, work

on your behavior. But if you want to make significant,
quantum breakthroughs, work on your paradigms.
- Stephen R. Covey

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 7

PARADIGMS AND PRINCIPLES OF EFFECTIVENESS

Notes

8 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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HABIT 1

Be Proactive ®

The Habit of Personal Responsibility

HOW CAN I GET MORE CONTROL

OVER MY LIFE?
• Pause before you respond.
• Use proactive language.
• Focus on your Circle of Influence.
 HABIT 1 BE PROACTIVE

Habit 1: Be Proactive®

Habi
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INTERDEPENDENCE

SA
W
Habit 5
SEEK FIRST TO
UNDERSTAND, THEN TO
Habit 6
BE UNDERSTOOD SYNERGIZE
PUBLIC VICTORY

Habit 4
THINK WIN-WIN

INDEPENDENCE

Habit 3
PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

HABIT 1
PRIVATE VICTORY
Habit 2
BE PROACTIVE BEGIN WITH THE
END IN MIND

DEPENDENCE

10 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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How Can I Get More Control Over My Life?

When you practice Habit 1, you’ll find the freedom to choose how you respond to
life’s circumstances.

Common Highly Effective

Paradigm Paradigm

You’re responsible for I am responsible for

my happiness. my happiness.

HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PRACTICES

• Pause before you respond.

• Use proactive language.
• Focus on your Circle
of Influence.

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 11

HABIT 1 BE PROACTIVE

Pause Before You Respond

REACTIVE

When you are reactive, you respond without thinking or controlling your reactions.
You simply react based on your moods in the heat of the moment.

STIMULUS
STIMULUS RESPONSE

PROACTIVE

When you are proactive, you stop long enough—sometimes just half a second—to
allow yourself the time to choose an effective response.

FREEDOM
STIMULUS
STIMULUS RESPONSE
TO CHOOSE

12 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

FREEDOM
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Use Proactive Language

REACTIVE LANGUAGE: PROACTIVE LANGUAGE:

• “I can’t.” • “I can.”

• “It’s not my fault.” • “I’m sorry. I apologize.”

• “I have to.” • “I choose to.”

• “We have no other choice.” • “Let’s look at all of

our options.”

• “They won’t let me.” • “I will get this done.”

• “There’s nothing we can do.” • “There must be something

we can do.”

YOU ARE BEING REACTIVE YOU ARE BEING PROACTIVE

WHEN YOU: WHEN YOU:

• Get angry and say things • Remain calm.

you regret.
• Don’t take responsibility for • Take responsibility.
your actions.
• Blame other people and things. • Focus on solutions.

Proactive language is the language of leadership.

- Rajan Kaicker

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 13

 N
HABIT 1 BE PROACTIVE
IRCLE OF
NFLUENCE

Focus on Your Circle of Influence

Things you can influence in your life fall within the Circle of Influence. Things you
have no control over fall within the Circle of Concern. When you are proactive,
you focus on what you can influence and don’t worry about what you can’t. When
you do this, your influence grows.CLE O
F CONC
R E
R
CI

N
E OF CONCE LE O
F CON
CE
R C R
IR
CIRCLE OF
C
N

N
INFLUENCE
IRCLE OF CIRCLE OF
NFLUENCE INFLUENCE

F CON F CON
OF CONC
ER CLE O CE CLE O CE
IR R IR
C

C
N
N

RCLE OF CIRCLE OF CIRCLE OF

FLUENCE INFLUENCE INFLUENCE

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Circle of Influence Challenge

Identify an issue that challenges you and that you are concerned about.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________

Write all the things you’re concerned about in the Circle of Concern. Write all the
things you can influence in the Circle of Influence.

LE OF CONCE
IRC RN
C

CIRCLE OF
INFLUENCE

What one or two specific actions will you take within your Circle of Influence?
_____________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 15

HABIT 1 BE PROACTIVE

Notes

16 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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HABIT 2

Begin With the

End in Mind ®

The Habit of Personal Vision

HOW CAN I LIVE WITH PURPOSE AND VISION?

• Create and live by a Personal Mission Statement.
HABIT 2 BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND

Habit 2: Begin With the End in Mind®

Habi
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INTERDEPENDENCE

SA
W
Habit 5
SEEK FIRST TO
UNDERSTAND, THEN TO
Habit 6
BE UNDERSTOOD SYNERGIZE
PUBLIC VICTORY

Habit 4
THINK WIN-WIN

INDEPENDENCE

Habit 3
PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

PRIVATE VICTORY
Habit 1 HABIT 2
BE PROACTIVE BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND

DEPENDENCE

18 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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How Can I Live With Purpose and Vision?

When you practice Habit 2 you shape your future. Whether you are thinking
about the outcome of a meeting, a relationship, or your life, Habit 2 helps you live
with purpose.

Common Highly Effective

Paradigm Paradigm

I just go wherever life takes me. I define my life’s vision and

purpose and live by it.

HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PRACTICE

• Create and live by a Personal

Mission Statement.

Lead your life or someone else will.

- Stephen R. Covey

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 19

HABIT 2 BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND

Create and Live by a

Personal Mission Statement
You will be more effective when you define your desired outcome before you
act. A carefully considered plan gives you the mental blueprint you need to create
the desired outcome. Highly effective people Begin With the End in Mind in
everything they do.

MENTAL PHYSICAL
FIRST CREATION SECOND CREATION

DEFINING OUTCOMES ACHIEVING OUTCOMES

A well-planned vacation A great family memory
A creative résumé A better job
A savings plan A down payment on a home
A Personal Mission Statement A centered life

20 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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PERSONAL MISSION STATEMENT

Your Personal Mission Statement will provide your life with
direction and purpose. It reminds you what you value and what
is important to you, helping guide your decisions.

We detect rather than invent

our missions in life.
- Viktor Frankl

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 21

HABIT 2 BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND

Mission Statement
Answer the questions below in the spaces provided. These questions will help you
think deeply about your life and what is most important to you.

Think of a person who has made a positive difference in your life. What
1 qualities does that person have that you would like to develop?
______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

What are your natural gifts and talents?

2
______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

What are the five things you value most?

3
______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

22 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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What are the things in your personal life that make life worth living?
4
______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

What are the things in your work life that make life worth living?
5 ______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

Imagine it is 20 years from now and you are surrounded by the most
important people in your life. What types of things would you like to
hear them say about you?

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 23

HABIT 2 BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND

Your Personal Mission Statement

24 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 25

 HABIT 2 BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND

MISSION STATEMENT GALLERY

Resolution

“Let the first act of every morning

be to make the following resolve
for the day: I shall not fear anyone
on Earth. I shall fear only God. I
shall not bear ill will toward anyone.
I shall not submit to injustice from
My Personal Mission
anyone. I shall conquer untruth by
Be honest. truth. And in resisting untruth, I
Be considerate. shall put up with all suffering.”
Show love and affection daily.
Reach out to those in need. —Mahatma Gandhi
Share my love of cooking and
food with friends and family.

My Mission
Love others no matter how unlovable they may seem. Express my
gratitude daily. Work hard, play hard, and live my life to the fullest!

26
26 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.
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I Strive to:
Learn something new
every day.
Serve my community by
volunteering my time, talents,
and energy.
Show respect for others at all
times and in all circumstances.
Live my life with integrity,
honesty, humor, and love.

To use my creativity
and positivity to better
the lives of those
around me, and
inspire others through
a quiet and inner
strength.

Our Family Mission: No empty chairs.

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 27

HABIT 2 BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND

TIPS FOR LIVING YOUR

PERSONAL MISSION STATEMENT:

• Create a short version—one or two sentences—and keep

it with you.

• Read it every day.

• Keep a personal journal. Record examples of how it

helped you make a decision or solve a problem.

• Set one or two small goals that align with achieving

your mission.

• Create an audio version of your mission statement and

listen to it in the car, on the bus, or while exercising.

• Share it with your friends and family.

28 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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Notes

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 29

HABIT 2 BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND

Notes

30 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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HABIT 3

Put First
Things First ®

The Habit of Personal Management

HOW CAN I SPEND MY TIME ON WHAT’S

MOST IMPORTANT?
• Focus on your highest priorities.
• Plan every week.
HABIT 3 PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

Habit 3: Put First Things First®

Habi
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INTERDEPENDENCE

SA
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Habit 5
SEEK FIRST TO
UNDERSTAND, THEN TO
Habit 6
BE UNDERSTOOD SYNERGIZE
PUBLIC VICTORY

Habit 4
THINK WIN-WIN

INDEPENDENCE

HABIT 3 PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

PRIVATE VICTORY
Habit 1 Habit 2
BE PROACTIVE BEGIN WITH THE
END IN MIND

DEPENDENCE

32 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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How Can I Spend My Time on What’s Most Important?

When you practice Habit 3, you organize your time around what is most important.

Common Highly Effective

Paradigm Paradigm

I spend my time on what’s I spend my time on what’s

most urgent. most important.

HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PRACTICES

• Focus on your highest priorities.

• Plan every week

Action expresses priorities.

- Mahatma Gandhi

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 33

HABIT 3 PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

Focus on Your Highest Priorities

IMPORTANT
Activities that represent your priorities, deepest values, goals, and mission.

URGENT
Activities that require your immediate attention.

The Time Matrix™

URGENT NOT URGENT 7 Habits Time M

Q1 NECESSITY Q2 EFFECTIVENESS
• Crises • Proactive work
IMPORTANT

• Deadlines • Important goals

• Sickness • Exercise
• __________________________ • __________________________
• __________________________ • __________________________
• __________________________ • __________________________

Q3 DISTRACTION Q4 WASTE
NOT IMPORTANT

• Interruptions • Excessive surfing on

• Some emails, meetings, the Web
and phone calls • Mindless television
• __________________________ • Gossip
• __________________________ • __________________________
IMPORTANT

• __________________________ Q1 Q2
• __________________________
IMPORTANT

• __________________________ Q3 Q4
NOT

URGENT NOT URGENT

34 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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Plan Every Week

Connect
STEP 1 With your mission and roles.

Mission key words:________________________________________________________

STEP 2 Schedule
Your Big Rocks.

Ask: “What are the one

or two most important
things I can do in this Big Rocks WEEK OF: _________________________________________

role this week?” ROLES BIG ROCKS

BODY:
Sharpen MIND:
1
the Saw® HEART:
SPIRIT:

STEP 3
Organize
The rest. 2

© FranklinCovey.

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 35

 HABIT 3 PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

Practice Weekly Planning Big Rocks WEEK OF: _________________________________________

ROLES BIG ROCKS

BODY:
Sharpen MIND:
1
the Saw® HEART:
SPIRIT:

SUNDAY MONDAY TUESDAY WEDNESDAY THURSDAY FRIDAY SATURDAY

6

© FranklinCovey.

36 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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TIPS FOR WEEKLY PLANNING:

• Plan before the week begins.

• Weekly planning is a Big Rock. Schedule it!

• P
 lan in a quiet place where you can focus and
think clearly.

• C
 hoose Big Rocks that will help you accomplish
your mission and live by the 7 Habits.

If you were to ask me what single practice would

do more to balance your life and increase your
productivity than any other, it would be this: plan
your week each week before the week begins.
- Stephen R. Covey

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 37

HABIT 3 PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

Notes

38 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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HABIT 4

Think Win-Win ®

The Habit of Mutual Benefit

HOW CAN I FIND “WINS” FOR EVERYONE?

• Build your Emotional Bank Account with others.
• Have an Abundance Mentality.
• Consider other people’s wins as well as your own.
HABIT 4 THINK WIN-WIN

Habit 4: Think Win-Win®

Habi
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INTERDEPENDENCE

SA
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Habit 5
SEEK FIRST TO
UNDERSTAND, THEN TO
Habit 6
BE UNDERSTOOD SYNERGIZE
PUBLIC VICTORY

HABIT 4 THINK WIN-WIN

INDEPENDENCE

Habit 3
PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

PRIVATE VICTORY
Habit 1 Habit 2
BE PROACTIVE BEGIN WITH THE
END IN MIND

DEPENDENCE

40 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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How Can I Find “Wins” for Everyone?

When you practice Habit 4, you have an attitude of cooperation and respect. When
you work with other people, you look for ways for everyone to win.

Common Highly Effective

Paradigm Paradigm

The more you get, the less there There’s more than enough
is for me. for everyone.

HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PRACTICES

• Build your Emotional Bank

Account with others.
• Have an Abundance Mentality.
• Consider other people’s wins as
well as your own.

You don’t have to blow out the other person’s light to

let your own shine.
- Bernard M. Baruch

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 41

HABIT 4 THINK WIN-WIN

Build Your Emotional Bank

Account With Others
You will build trust in relationships when you make consistent deposits in the
Emotional Bank Accounts of other people.

EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT

The Emotional Bank Account is a way to think about the amount of trust in
your relationships. Deposits build and repair trust. Withdrawals break down trust
in your relationships.

Low Trust High Trust

WITHDRAWALS DEPOSITS
• Assume you understand. • Seek first to understand.
• Show unkindness, discourtesy, • Show kindness, courtesy,
and disrespect. and respect.
• Break promises. • Keep promises.
• Be disloyal; bad-mouth. • Be loyal to the absent.
• Create unclear expectations. • Set clear expectations.
• Be proud and arrogant. • Apologize.
• Hold grudges. • Forgive.

42 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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Have an Abundance Mentality

When people are effective with others, they have a paradigm that there’s enough to
go around—and then some. We call this an Abundance Mentality.

WIN-LOSE
1
Win-lose is about competition and ego. It’s a lack of abundance and feeling
like the “pie” of success is only so big—the more someone else gets, the less
you get.

LOSE-WIN
2
Lose-win is when you feel weak or that you have no control. You set
yourself up to fail with a lose-win mindset because you don’t believe you
deserve any better.

LOSE-LOSE
3
Lose-lose is negative. When you think lose-lose, your mindset is “If I’m
going to lose, so are you.”

WIN-WIN
4
Win-win is like an all-you-can-eat buffet. There is plenty for everyone.
When you have a win-win mindset, you are highly considerate of other
people and also have the courage to speak up for yourself.

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 43

HABIT 4 THINK WIN-WIN

Consider Other People’s Wins

as Well as Your Own
When you Think Win-Win, you take the time to identify everyone’s wins when
solving problems, making agreements, and creating opportunities.

CASE STUDY
Leon has worked at his job in shipping and receiving for about five years and really
likes it. When he started working for the company, he had the tech and computer
experience he needed to do his job well. Lately he feels like technology and
software are changing a lot and his skills are not keeping up. Leon asked his manager
André for training. André just keeps saying that the company doesn’t have the
money for that kind of thing right now.

LEON’S WINS ANDRÉ’S WINS

44 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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YOUR OWN CASE

Think of a relationship that could benefit from win-win thinking. Fill in the wins
by answering the questions below.

WHAT WOULD MAKE WHAT WOULD MAKE THIS A

THIS A WIN FOR YOU? WIN FOR THE OTHER PERSON?

In the long run, if it isn’t a win for both of us, we both

lose. That’s why win-win in relationships is the only
realistic alternative.
- Stephen R. Covey

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 45

HABIT 4 THINK WIN-WIN

Notes

46 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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HABIT 5

Seek First to
Understand,
Then to Be
Understood ®

The Habit of Empathic Communication

HOW CAN I UNDERSTAND OTHERS BETTER?

• Practice Empathic Listening.
• Respectfully seek to be understood.
 HABIT 5 SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND, THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD

Habit 5: Seek First to Understand,

Then to Be Understood®

Habi
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INTERDEPENDENCE

SA
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HABIT 5
Habit 6
SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND, SYNERGIZE
THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD PUBLIC VICTORY

Habit 4
THINK WIN-WIN

INDEPENDENCE

Habit 3
PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

PRIVATE VICTORY
Habit 1 Habit 2
BE PROACTIVE BEGIN WITH THE
END IN MIND

DEPENDENCE

48 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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How Can I Understand Others Better?

When you practice Habit 5, you increase your ability to understand other people.
When you really listen and people feel understood, they will trust you and be more
receptive to what you have to say. Your influence will grow.

Common Highly Effective

Paradigm Paradigm

I need to make sure people I have more influence when I

understand my point of view. listen first.

HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PRACTICES

• Practice Empathic Listening.

• Respectfully seek to
be understood.

When I ask you to listen and you feel you have to do

something to solve my problem, you have failed me,
strange as it may seem. Listen! All I ask is that you
listen; not talk or do—just hear me.
- Ralph Roughton, M.D.

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 49

HABIT 5 SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND, THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD

What Not to Do When You Listen

AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL RESPONSES

1. PROBE
Don’t ask questions to get more information or to meet your needs
or curiosity.
• “What happened?”
• “Did that make you angry?”
• “What did they say next?”

2. JUDGE
Don’t agree or disagree with what the other person is saying.
• “That was really smart.”
• “I can’t believe you did that!”
• “I totally agree with what you are saying.”

3. ADVISE
Don’t offer or recommend solutions, or talk about what you
would do.
• “The same thing happened to me. Here’s what I would do.”
• “Well, I think you should…”
• “If I were you, I would…”

4. INTERPRET
Don’t try to figure out or analyze the other person.
• “I bet you wish you hadn’t done that.”
• “You always do that because…”
• “You know, when I was in that situation, I felt…”

50 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

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Practice Empathic Listening

INTENT SKILL
LISTEN TO REFLECT FEELINGS
UNDERSTAND AND WORDS

You feel _______________ about ________________.

angry, frustrated, excited, sad, irritated, content, topic, or meaning

ignored, misunderstood, happy, nervous, of what is being said
hesitant, embarrassed, foolish, upset,
discouraged, stifled, disrespected, emotional,
confused, speechless, unsure, enthusiastic

When you really listen to another person from

their point of view, and reflect back to them that
understanding, it’s like giving them emotional oxygen.
- Stephen R. Covey

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 51

HABIT 5 SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND, THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD

Practice Empathic Responses

In the right-hand column, write an empathic response to each statement. What did
you see and hear?

STATEMENT REFLECT FEELINGS AND WORDS

“I can’t believe I have to take closing

shift again. It’s not fair!”

“I got a flat tire on the way to work

and I missed a key meeting.”

“My son is sick again; I’m worried that

it’s something serious.”

“The people next door kept me up all

night with their loud music!”

ASK CLARIFYING QUESTIONS

When people answer you but you still don’t understand, or when they give
you a short answer and you still need more information, you can ask a
clarifying question, like:
• “Can you tell me more?”
• “I’m not sure I’m getting it.”
• “Can you tell me what you mean by that?”
Clarifying questions can help move the conversation along. Clarifying
questions come from the other person’s story, not yours.

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 P 1 2 3 4 g 6 7

Watch the Signals

Stop talking and listen empathically when

emotion is high.

Slow down. Watch and be ready to listen

empathically.

Go forward and seek to be understood when

the issue is clear and you’ve been asked to
give counsel or advise.

TIPS FOR LISTENING EMPATHICALLY:

• Focus on your intent.
• Don’t worry if you don’t get it right.
• Don’t be afraid of silence.

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 53

HABIT 5 SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND, THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD

Respectfully Seek to Be Understood

Seeking to be understood is the second half of effective communication. Once you
are confident the other person feels completely understood, you may share your
point of view with respect and openness. Just like Empathic Listening, seeking to be
understood requires both intent and skill.

SKILL
INTENT STATE YOUR POINT
SEEK TO OF VIEW USING
BE UNDERSTOOD “I” MESSAGES.

State your point of view:

• “I feel _______________ about ________________.”
• “I would like to...”
• “Based on my experience, I think we should…”
• “You could be right. However, I’d prefer...”
• “That sounds interesting. Can we come back to it later?
• “I can see what you mean. I have a different point of vie
I’d like to share.”
• “Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Would you be
willing to hear mine?”

54 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

 P 1 2 3 4 g 6 7

Practice “I” Messages

Rewrite the “You” message in the left-hand column as an “I” message in the
right-hand column.

“YOU” MESSAGE “I” MESSAGE

“You make me so angry!”

“You made this report a mess!”

“You’re always late.”

“You never take my input seriously.”

“You made me miss my appointment.”

“I” MESSAGES
Describe your feelings, concerns, and perceptions. “I” messages make deposits into
other people’s Emotional Bank Accounts.

“YOU” MESSAGES
Describe the other person’s behavior and motives. “You” messages blame and
accuse. They make withdrawals from other people’s Emotional Bank Accounts.

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 55

HABIT 5 SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND, THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD

Notes

56 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

 P 1 2 3 4 5 h 7

HABIT 6

Synergize ®

The Habit of Creative Cooperation

HOW CAN I WORK WITH OTHERS TO FIND

CREATIVE SOLUTIONS?
• Value Differences.
• Seek 3rd Alternatives.
HABIT 6 SYNERGIZE

Habit 6: Synergize®

Habi
t7
SH
AR
PE
N
TH
E
INTERDEPENDENCE

SA
W
Habit 5
SEEK FIRST TO
UNDERSTAND, THEN TO HABIT 6
BE UNDERSTOOD
PUBLIC VICTORY SYNERGIZE

Habit 4
THINK WIN-WIN

INDEPENDENCE

Habit 3
PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

PRIVATE VICTORY
Habit 1 Habit 2
BE PROACTIVE BEGIN WITH THE
END IN MIND

DEPENDENCE

58 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

 P 1 2 3 4 5 h 7

How Can I Work With Others to Find Creative Solutions?

When you practice Habit 6, you work with others to come up with solutions to
problems or create opportunities that are better than what you could have come up
with on your own.

Common Highly Effective

Paradigm Paradigm

Let’s compromise. Let’s come up with a better

way together.

HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PRACTICES

• Value differences.
• Seek 3rd Alternatives.

Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much.

- Helen Keller

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 59

HABIT 6 SYNERGIZE

Value Differences
When you work effectively with others, you welcome and celebrate the differences
other people bring to the group. You look for and gain from everyone’s strengths.
In the space below, write the strengths of your team members. Start with yourself.

YOU TEAM MEMBER TEAM MEMBER TEAM MEMBER

60 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

 P 1 2 3 4 5 h 7

Synergy
Synergy is when you work with others and get a result that is greater than the sum
of the parts. You can feel the energy shift when you are synergizing—it’s exciting!

WHICH HABITS DID YOUR GROUP USE?

Synergy is what happens when one plus one

equals ten, or a hundred, or even a thousand!
...It’s about the passion, the energy, the ingenuity,
the excitement of creating a new reality that is far
better than the old reality.
- Stephen R. Covey

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 61

HABIT 6 SYNERGIZE

Seek 3rd Alternatives

When you are effective, you seek 3rd Alternatives—not “my way” or “your way,”
but better ideas and solutions that you come up with together.

THE PATH TO SYNERGY

3RD ALTERNATIVE
1 + 1 = 3, 10, 100

EXPLORE ALTERNATIVES

BE WILLING
SEEK FIRST
TO UNDERSTAND,
CLARIFY THE THEN TO BE
END IN MIND UNDERSTOOD

VALUE DIFFERENCES

62 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

 P 1 2 3 4 5 h 7

Practice Seeking a 3rd Alternative

CASE STUDY 1
Shelia and Anton share an office with a window. Shelia frequently wants the
window open to let fresh air into the room. Anton really wants the window to stay
closed to minimize noise and drafts. Both want a stress-free workplace.

1. WHAT IS THE END IN MIND?

2. WHAT ARE EVERYONE’S WINS?

3. WHAT ARE THE ALTERNATIVES, OPTIONS, AND WILD IDEAS?

THE 3RD ALTERNATIVE ______________________________________________

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 63

HABIT 6 SYNERGIZE

CASE STUDY 2
Hiro wants to go back to school, but his usual work hours will conflict with some
of his classes. His manager, Martina, is worried that Hiro’s job performance will
suffer if he moves to a flexible work schedule. Both Hiro and Martina take pride in
their jobs and would like to see the company succeed.

1. WHAT IS THE END IN MIND?

2. WHAT ARE EVERYONE’S WINS?

3. WHAT ARE THE ALTERNATIVES, OPTIONS, AND WILD IDEAS?

THE 3RD ALTERNATIVE ______________________________________________

64 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

 P 1 2 3 4 5 h 7

YOUR OWN CASE

1. WHAT IS THE END IN MIND?

2. WHAT ARE EVERYONE’S WINS?

3. WHAT ARE THE ALTERNATIVES, OPTIONS, AND WILD IDEAS?

THE 3RD ALTERNATIVE ______________________________________________

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 65

HABIT 6 SYNERGIZE

Notes

66 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

 P 1 2 3 4 5 6 j

HABIT 7

Sharpen
the Saw ®

The Habit of Daily Self-Renewal

HOW CAN I INVEST IN MYSELF?

• Achieve the Daily Private Victory.
HABIT 7 SHARPEN THE SAW

Habit 7: Sharpen the Saw®

HA
BIT
7
SH
AR
INTERDEPENDENCE

PE
N
Habit 5

TH
Habit 6

ES
SEEK FIRST TO
UNDERSTAND, THEN TO
SYNERGIZE

AW
BE UNDERSTOOD
PUBLIC VICTORY

Habit 4
THINK WIN-WIN

INDEPENDENCE

Habit 3
PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

PRIVATE VICTORY
Habit 1 Habit 2
BE PROACTIVE BEGIN WITH THE
END IN MIND

DEPENDENCE

68 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

 P 1 2 3 4 5 6 j

How Can I Invest in Myself?

When you practice Habit 7, you take time every day to renew yourself in body,
mind, heart, and spirit. This is the habit that makes all the other habits work. Take
care of your most important asset—you!

Common Highly Effective

Paradigm Paradigm

I’m too busy today to take time I take time for myself every
for myself. day because it gives me the
ability to do everything else.

HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PRACTICE

• Achieve the Daily

Private Victory

Habit 7 surrounds the other habits on the 7 Habits

Maturity Continuum because it is the habit that makes all
the others possible.
- Stephen R. Covey

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 69

HABIT 7 SHARPEN THE SAW

The Four Dimensions of Renewal

You are made up of four dimensions. You find balance when you regularly renew
in all four. If you neglect one, the others suffer.

BODY HEART
Exercise, nutrition, Consistent deposits in
rest, stress management EBAs of key relationships

MIND SPIRIT
Reading, writing, Service, values
learning, study clarification, inspirational
literature, meditation,
nature

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 P 1 2 3 4 5 6 j

Achieve the Daily Private Victory

The Daily Private Victory is what you do every day to take care of yourself. It’s a
routine or practice that keeps you healthy in body, mind, heart, and spirit.

To renew your BODY:

• Set health and fitness goals.
• Include vegetables, fruits, whole grains, fiber, and lots of water in your diet.
• Reduce your stress by cutting down on Quadrant 3 activities.
• ________________________________________________________________________________________

To renew your MIND:

• Keep a journal to collect your thoughts and work out problems.
• Read a variety of books.
• Develop a hobby and do something you love.
• ________________________________________________________________________________________

To renew your HEART:

• Make deposits into the Emotional Bank Account of others.
• Value the differences in others and look for opportunities to Synergize.
• Build family relationships through Empathic Listening.
• ________________________________________________________________________________________

To renew your SPIRIT:

• Create, review, and refine your Personal Mission Statement.
• Appreciate and enjoy the world of nature.
• Give meaningful service.
• ________________________________________________________________________________________

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 71

HABIT 7 SHARPEN THE SAW

Big Rocks WEEK OF: _________________________________________

ROLES BIG ROCKS

BODY:
Sharpen MIND:
1
the Saw® HEART:
SPIRIT:

MY DAILY PRIVATE VICTORY

2

© FranklinCovey.

TIPS FOR ACHIEVING YOUR

DAILY PRIVATE VICTORY:
• SCHEDULE IT. This is a Big Rock and deserves your best attention.
You are more likely to do something if you schedule it.

• START SMALL. Take on something you enjoy—something motivating

or that you are curious about.

• STAY MOTIVATED BY SUCCESS. Continue any activity you are

already doing well and enjoy.

• ADJUST OFTEN. Be flexible. Life is constantly changing and so will

your interests, motivation, and time. Rotate new activities as often as
you need to.

• GET A BUDDY. Plan your renewal activities with a friend and hold each
other accountable.

• ASK FOR HELP! It’s okay to want or need support when making
changes in your life. Ask a friend or family member to come along with
you, or brainstorm other ideas in order to stay motivated.

72 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

 DAILY PRIVATE VICTORY GALLERY P 1 2 3 4 5 6 j

Kai:
Every morning before I leave for work, my wife
and I walk our dogs (body) and talk about the
books we are currently reading (mind)—what
we like, don’t like, or find challenging and
worth discussion. We consistently plan one
night a week as our “date night”—no phones,
computers, or other interruptions (heart). Each Katherine:
night before bed, I take a few minutes to read Although my grad school courses
or listen to something spiritually uplifting to me
(spirit), which helps me turn off the stress of the
take up a large part of my week
day and get a good night’s sleep. (mind), I take time at least five
mornings a week to go for a run
or power walk (body), which really
helps give me the energy I need
throughout the day—particularly
on days when I have classes in
addition to my job. My parents
live far from me, so we schedule
a once-a-week video chat (heart)
to make sure we are always in
touch with each other. I attend a
weekly religious service (spirit) at
a congregation close to where I
currently live, and that really helps
me stay focused and grounded in
Mario: what matters most to me.
As an IT worker, I read some technology
blogs or take an online course weekly
(mind) so that I know I am always on top
of the latest upgrades and developments.
We eat dinner together as a family almost
every evening (heart). As parents of three
children, we plan and prepare more
healthy meals together and eat out less at
fast-food restaurants (body). We volunteer
as a family at the local homeless shelter
once a month (spirit), and enjoy the
beauty around us at all seasons of the year.
© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 73
HABIT 7 SHARPEN THE SAW

Notes

74 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

 P 1 2 3 4 5 6 7

Resources
• See-Do-Get Cycle Summary
• The 7 Habits Practices Summary
• Quotes From the Work-Session Videos
• Big Rocks Tool
RESOURCES

See-Do-Get Cycle Summary

Remember that to change your habits, you must change your paradigms. The See-
Do-Get Cycle helps you do that because the focus is on getting rid of your old,
ineffective paradigms and adopting new, effective paradigms.

Use the information on these two pages to help you remember how the See-Do-
Get Cycle works and the specific paradigms, practices, and results that are directly
connected to each habit.

PARADIGMS

SEE

PRINCIPLES
OF EFFECTIVENESS
T
GE

DO

RESULTS PRACTICES

76 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

 P 1 2 3 4 5 6 7

SEE DO
GET
Highly Effective Highly Effective
Paradigms Results
Practices

• Pause before you respond.

Habit 1

I am responsible for • Use proactive language. I get more control over

my happiness. my life.
• Focus on your Circle
of Influence.
Habit 2

I define my life’s vision and • Create and live by a I live a life of purpose
purpose and live by it. Personal Mission Statement. and vision.

• Focus on your
Habit 3

I spend my time on what’s highest priorities. I get the important things in

most important. my life done.
• Plan every week.

• Build your Emotional Bank

Account with others.
Habit 4

I find “wins” for

There’s more than enough • Have an Abundance
everyone and build
for everyone. Mentality.
effective relationships.
• Consider other people’s
wins as well as your own.

• Practice Empathic
Habit 5

Listening. I understand others

I have more influence
and communicate
when I listen first. • Respectfully seek to more effectively.
be understood.
Habit 6

• Value differences. We can solve problems

Let’s come up with a better
and create exciting new
way together. • Seek 3rd Alternatives. ideas together.
Habit 7

I take time for myself every

• Achieve the I have more energy to live a
day because it helps me do
Daily Private Victory. balanced life.
everything else better.

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 77

RESOURCES

The 7 Habits Practices Summary

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Foundations work session introduces you to
a subset of the 20 practices of the 7 Habits Signature work session. Below is a brief
description of all 20 practices.

HABIT 1: BE PROACTIVE®

When you are proactive, you take responsibility for your own life.
1. PAUSE AND RESPOND BASED ON PRINCIPLES AND DESIRED RESULTS.
You can create space between what happens to you (stimulus) and your
response to it. In that space, you have the freedom to choose your response,
instead of just reacting based on your mood, feelings, or circumstance.
2. USE PROACTIVE LANGUAGE.
Your language reflects and shapes your mindset. Proactive language has a
positive impact on your brain chemistry, causing you to think and feel better.
When you use proactive language, you take responsibility for your life, and
others see you as a more capable person.
3. FOCUS ON YOUR CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE.
There are all sorts of things to worry about in life, things that fall within your
Circle of Concern. When you are proactive, you focus only on those things you
have control over—those things within your Circle of Influence. When you do
this, your influence grows.
4. BECOME A TRANSITION PERSON.
When you are proactive, you can become a Transition Person because you
replace unhealthy, harmful, abusive, or ineffective patterns of behavior from
your past with proactive, helpful, and effective behaviors.

HABIT 2: BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND®

When you Begin With the End in Mind, you clearly define your vision and purpose
in life. It will make all the difference.
5. DEFINE OUTCOMES BEFORE YOU ACT.
All things are created first in your mind. When you’re effective, you take time
to get a clear idea of what you want to achieve before you act.

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 P 1 2 3 4 5 6 7

6. CREATE AND LIVE BY A PERSONAL MISSION STATEMENT.

A Personal Mission Statement is the end in mind for your life. It helps you
shape your own future instead of letting it be shaped by other people or
circumstances.

HABIT 3: PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST®

When you Put First Things First, you spend time on what is most important.
7. FOCUS ON YOUR HIGHEST PRIORITIES.
Everyone’s time is pulled toward urgent things that may or may not be
important. When you are effective, you choose to spend your time on what is
important to you.
8. ELIMINATE THE UNIMPORTANT.
You can spend more time on important things when you choose to reduce or
eliminate the time you spend on unimportant things.
9. PLAN EVERY WEEK.
Planning every week allows you to schedule your priorities. Take time alone
in a quiet place each week to reconnect with your mission, roles, and goals,
and identify your Big Rocks. Then schedule your Big Rocks first, before your
calendar gets filled up with everything else.
10. STAY TRUE IN THE MOMENT OF CHOICE.
It’s easy to get pulled away from your priorities in the pressures of the moment.
When you are effective, you align your choices to your mission, roles, and goals.

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 79

RESOURCES

PRIVATE VICTORY® TO PUBLIC VICTORY®

When you practice Habits 1, 2, and 3, you win the Private Victory and take control
of your life. Only then can you practice Habits 4, 5, and 6 and become more
effective in your relationships, winning the Public Victory.
11. BUILD YOUR EMOTIONAL BANK ACCOUNT WITH OTHERS.
The Emotional Bank Account is a metaphor for the amount of trust in a
relationship. Making deposits (for example, by seeking first to understand,
keeping promises, and showing kindness and respect) builds trust and leads to
more effective relationships.

HABIT 4: THINK WIN-WIN®

When you Think Win-Win, you seek mutual benefit in all interactions—you want
everyone to win.
12. HAVE AN ABUNDANCE MENTALITY.
When you have an Abundance Mentality, you hold a mindset that there’s
enough to go around—and more! This frees you from feeling threatened by the
success of others and is the foundation for thinking win-win.
13. BALANCE COURAGE AND CONSIDERATION.
Courage is being willing and able to speak your thoughts respectfully.
Consideration is being willing and able to seek out and listen to other people’s
thoughts and feelings with respect. When you are both courageous and
considerate, you will help everyone win.
14. CONSIDER OTHER PEOPLE’S WINS AS WELL AS YOUR OWN.
When you Think Win-Win, you take the time to clearly identify everyone’s
wins, including your own.
15. CREATE WIN-WIN AGREEMENTS.
A Win-Win Agreement is when two or more parties commit to work to
benefit each other as well as themselves. Win-Win Agreements can be formal or
informal, and can be made in just about any relationship or circumstance.

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 P 1 2 3 4 5 6 7

HABIT 5: SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND, THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD®

You will have greater influence with other people if you truly understand them first.
16. PRACTICE EMPATHIC LISTENING.
Listening with empathy means getting to the heart of what matters to the other
person, whether you agree or not. To listen empathically, you reflect the other
person’s feelings and words with the intent to understand them.
17. RESPECTFULLY SEEK TO BE UNDERSTOOD.
Once you are confident others feel understood, you can share your own point
of view with respect and clarity.

HABIT 6: SYNERGIZE®

When you Synergize, you work with others to come up with something that is
better than what either of you had in mind.
18. VALUE DIFFERENCES.
When you are effective, you value and embrace the differences in other people
and see them as strengths.
19. SEEK 3RD ALTERNATIVES.
More than just “my way” or “your way,” a 3rd Alternative is a higher, better way.

HABIT 7: SHARPEN THE SAW®

When you Sharpen the Saw, you take time every day to take care of yourself.
20. ACHIEVE THE DAILY PRIVATE VICTORY.
You achieve the Daily Private Victory when you spend time each day in a
routine way renewing your body, mind, heart, and spirit. This gives you the
capacity to live all the other habits.

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. 81

RESOURCES

Quotes From the Work-Session Videos

“Your habits determine your destiny.” Stephen R. Covey

(Introduction: 7 Habits Promise)

“It is our character that communicates most eloquently.” Stephen R. Covey

(Introduction: Roots of Effectiveness)

“Your life is the result of your own decisions—not your conditions.”

Stephen R. Covey
(Habit 1: Carry Your Own Weather)

“Between what happens to us and our response is a space. In that space lies our
power and our freedom to choose our response. And in those choices lie our
growth and our happiness.” Stephen R. Covey
(Habit 1: Carry Your Own Weather)

“They cannot take away our self-respect if we do not give it to them.”

Mahatma Gandhi
(Habit 1: Carry Your Own Weather)

“Win-win is a frame of mind and heart that constantly seeks mutual benefit in all
human interactions.” Stephen R. Covey
(Habit 4: Win-Win Thinking)

“Sharpening the saw each day in each of the four dimensions is called the Daily
Private Victory.” Sean Covey
(Habit 7: Daily Private Victory)

82 © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

Big Rocks WEEK OF: _________________________________________ Big Rocks WEEK OF: _________________________________________

ROLES BIG ROCKS ROLES BIG ROCKS

BODY: BODY:
Sharpen MIND: Sharpen MIND:
1 1
the Saw® HEART: the Saw® HEART:
SPIRIT: SPIRIT:

2 2

3 3

4 4

5 5

6 6

7 7

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

Big Rocks WEEK OF: _________________________________________ Big Rocks WEEK OF: _________________________________________

ROLES BIG ROCKS ROLES BIG ROCKS

BODY: BODY:
Sharpen MIND: Sharpen MIND:
1 1
the Saw® HEART: the Saw® HEART:
SPIRIT: SPIRIT:

2 2

3 3

4 4

5 5

6 6

7 7

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.
Notes Notes
________________________________________________ ________________________________________________

________________________________________________ ________________________________________________

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________________________________________________ ________________________________________________

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© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

Notes Notes
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© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.
Big Rocks WEEK OF: _________________________________________ Big Rocks WEEK OF: _________________________________________

ROLES BIG ROCKS ROLES BIG ROCKS

BODY: BODY:
Sharpen MIND: Sharpen MIND:
1 1
the Saw® HEART: the Saw® HEART:
SPIRIT: SPIRIT:

2 2

3 3

4 4

5 5

6 6

7 7

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

Big Rocks WEEK OF: _________________________________________ Big Rocks WEEK OF: _________________________________________

ROLES BIG ROCKS ROLES BIG ROCKS

BODY: BODY:
Sharpen MIND: Sharpen MIND:
1 1
the Saw® HEART: the Saw® HEART:
SPIRIT: SPIRIT:

2 2

3 3

4 4

5 5

6 6

7 7

© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.
Notes Notes
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© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.

Notes Notes
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© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved. © Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.
© Franklin Covey Co. All rights reserved.