Longman Academic

Writing Series
FOURTH EDITION PARAGRAPHS TO ESSAYS

Alice Oshima • Ann Hogue

ALWAY,S LEARNING • PEARSON

 Longman Academic
Writing Series
FOURTH EDITION PARAGRAPHS TO ESSAYS

Alice Oshima
Ann Hogue
with Jane Curtis
 CONTENTS

To the Teacher ...................................................................................................................... xi

Acknowledgments .............................................................................................................. xii
Chapter Overview................................................................................................................xiii

PART I: WRITING A PARAGRAPH

• chapter 1 Academic Paragraphs .................................................................. 2

Introduction .................................................................................................................. 3
Analyzing the Model ..................................................................................................... 3

Noticing Vocabulary: Word Families .....................................................................4

Organization ................................................................................................................s
Formatting the Page ....................................................................................................6

Mechanics .................................................................................................................. 1 o

Sentence Structure .................................................................................................14

Simple Sentences ...................................................................................................... 14
Phrases ........................................................................................................................ 15
Subject-Verb Agreement ........................................................................................... 16
Fragments....................................................................................................................18

Applying Vocabulary: Using Nouns and Verbs .................................................... 19

The Writing Process ............................................................................................... 21

Listing .......................................................................................................................... 21

Writing Assignment: A Paragraph about Someone Who Made a Difference..... 27

Self-Assessment ...................................................................................................... 29

Expansion ................................................................................................................... 29
Timed Writing: A Paragraph about Someone Who Taught You a Lesson......... 29
Journal Writing ............................................................................................................ 30

iii
 •chapter 2 Narrative Paragraphs .................................................................. 31

Introduction ................................................................................................................ 32
Analyzing the Model. .................................................................................................. 32

Noticing Vocabulary: Compound Nouns .............................................................. 33

Organization .............................................................................................................. 34
Time-Order Signals .................................................................................................... 34

Purpose ........................................................................................................................ 38

Sentence Structure ................................................................................................. 39

Analyzing the Model................................................................................................... 39
Compound Sentences ............................................................................................... 40
Coordinating Conjunctions ....................................................................................... 41

Punctuation ................................................................................................................ 44
Three Comma Rules .................................................................................................. 44

Applying Vocabulary: Using Compound Nouns .................................................. 46

Preparation for Writing .......................................................................................... 46

Freewriting ................................................................................................................... 47

Writing Assignment: A Narrative Paragraph about a Memorable Experience ... 48

Self-Assessment ...................................................................................................... 49

Expansion ................................................................................................................... 49
Timed Writing: A Paragraph about a Time You Disobeyed Rules ...................... 49
Journal Writing ............................................................................................................ 50

•chapter 3 Basic Paragraph Structure ..................................................... 51

Introduction ................................................................................................................ 52
Analyzing the Model................................................................................................... 52

Noticing Vocabulary: Adjectives .......................................................................... 53

Organization .............................................................................................................. 54
The Topic Sentence ................................................................................................... 54
Supporting Sentences: Main Points ........................................................................ 61
Supporting Details: Examples .................................................................................. 62
The Concluding Sentence ......................................................................................... 64

iv Contents
 Sentence Structure ................................................................................................. 69
Analyzing the Model...................................................................................................69
Adjectives and Adverbs in Basic Sentences .......................................................... 70

Applying Vocabulary: Using Adjectives ................................................................ 72

Preparation for Writing .......................................................................................... 73

Outlining.......................................................................................................................73
The Detailed Outline ................................................................................................... 74

Writing Assignment: A Paragraph about a Hobby or Sport .............................. 76

Self-Assessment ...................................................................................................... 77

Expansion ...................................................................................................................77
Timed Writing: A Paragraph about a Relaxing Activity ........................................ 77
Summary Writing ........................................................................................................78

Chapter 4 Logical Division of Ideas........................................................... 79

Introduction ................................................................................................................80
Analyzing the Model ...................................................................................................80

Noticing Vocabulary: Synonyms ............................................................................ 81

Organization ..............................................................................................................82
Logical Division of Ideas............................................................................................82
Unity in the Supporting Sentences of a Paragraph ...............................................85
Coherence in the Supporting Sentences of a Paragraph..................................... 86

Sentence Structure .................................................................................................96

Run-ons and Comma Splices ..................................................................................96
Correcting Run-ons and Comma Splices ............................................................... 96
Finding Run-ons and Comma Splices .................................................................... 96

Applying Vocabulary: Using Synonyms and Near Synonyms ........................... 99

Writing Assignment: A Paragraph about Shopping Habits ............................... 99

Self-Assessment .................................................................................................... 1oo

Expansion ................................................................................................................. 101

Timed Writing: A Paragraph for Students about Shopping............................... 101
Summary Writing ......................................................................................................101

Contents v
 Chapter 5 Process Paragraphs .................................................................. 102
Introduction .............................................................................................................. 103
Analyzing the Model.................................................................................................103

Noticing Vocabulary: Phrasal Verbs ....................................................................104

Organization ............................................................................................................ 105

Topic Sentences in Process Paragraphs ..............................................................105
Supporting Sentences in Process Paragraphs .................................................... 105
Concluding Sentences for Process Paragraphs.................................................. 105
Using Time Order in Process Paragraphs ............................................................106

Purpose ...................................................................................................................... 109

Audience .................................................................................................................... 109

Sentence Structure ............................................................................................... 11 o

Analyzing the Model.................................................................................................11 o
Clauses and Complex Sentences..........................................................................112

Applying Vocabulary: Using Phrasal Verbs ........................................................117

Writing Assignment: A Process Paragraph about Self-Improvement ............ 118

Self-Assessment .................................................................................................... 119

Expansion ................................................................................................................. 120

Timed Writing: A Paragraph about Learning English Vocabulary .................... 120
Email to a Professor ................................................................................................. 120

Chapter 6 Definition Paragraphs............................................................... 121

Introduction .............................................................................................................. 122
Analyzing the Model ................................................................................................. 122

Noticing Vocabulary: Word Knowledge .............................................................. 123

Organization ............................................................................................................ 124

Sentence Structure ............................................................................................... 128

Analyzing the Model.................................................................................................128
Appositives ................................................................................................................129
Adjective Clauses .....................................................................................................131
Complex Sentences with Adjective Clauses ........................................................133

vi Contents
 Applying Vocabulary: Using Word Knowledge .................................................. 142

Preparation for Writing ........................................................................................ 143

Clustering .................................................................................................................. 143

Writing Assignment A Paragraph That Defines a Word, Concept, or Custom ... 144

Self-Assessment .................................................................................................... 145

Expansion ................................................................................................................. 146

Timed Writing: A Paragraph That Defines Family ............................................... 146
Paraphrasing ............................................................................................................. 146

Chapter 7 Cause/ Effect Paragraphs .................................................... 148

Introduction .............................................................................................................. 149
Analyzing the Model................................................................................................. 149

Noticing Vocabulary: Prefixes .............................................................................. 150

Organization ............................................................................................................ 151

Topic Sentences in Cause/ Effect Paragraphs ................................................... 151
Supporting Sentences in Cause/ Effect Paragraphs ......................................... 152
Concluding Sentences for Cause/ Effect Paragraphs ....................................... 152

Sentence Structure ............................................................................................... 160

Analyzing the Model ................................................................................................. 160
Cause I Effect Transition Signals ........................................................................... 161

Applying Vocabulary: Using Prefixes .................................................................. 167

Writing Assignment: A Cause/ Effect Paragraph about a Social Issue ........ 168

Self-Assessment .................................................................................................... 169

Expansion ................................................................................................................. 169

Timed Writing: A Paragraph about the Positive Effects of Walking ................. 169
Double-Entry Journal Writing ................................................................................. 170

•chapter 8 Comparison/ Contrast Paragraphs ............................... 171

Introduction .............................................................................................................. 172
Analyzing the Model................................................................................................. 172

Noticing Vocabulary: Antonyms........................................................................... 173

Contents vii
 Organization ............................................................................................................ 174
Topic Sentences in Comparison / Contrast Paragraphs .................................... 175
Supporting Sentences in Comparison / Contrast Paragraphs .......................... 175
Concluding Sentences in Comparison / Contrast Paragraphs ......................... 176

Sentence Structure ............................................................................................... 182

Analyzing the Model................................................................................................. 182
Transition Signals for Comparison......................................................................... 183
Transition Signals for Contrast ............................................................................... 187

Applying Vocabulary: Using Antonyms............................................................... 190

Preparation for Writing ........................................................................................ 191

Conducting an Interview ......................................................................................... 191

Writing Assignment: A Comparison / Contrast Paragraph about Education ... 194

Self-Assessment .................................................................................................... 195

Expansion ................................................................................................................. 195

T imed Writing: A Paragraph about Your Education vs. a Parent's ................... 195
Double-Entry Journal Writing ................................................................................. 196

PART II: WRITING AN ESSAY

•chapter 9 Essay Organization..................................................................... 198

Introduction .............................................................................................................. 199
Analyzing the Model ................................................................................................. 199

Noticing Vocabulary: Formal and Informal Words ............................................ 201

Organization .............................................._.............................................................. 202

Introductory Paragraphs.......................................................................................... 203
Body Paragraphs...................................................................................................... 205
Concluding Paragraphs ........................................................................................... 206
Transitions between Paragraphs ............................................................................ 209
Essay Outlining ......................................................................................................... 213

The Writing Process ............................................................................................. 215

Applying Vocabulary: Using Formal and Informal Vocabulary ........................ 218

Writing Assignment: An Essay about Nonverbal Communication ................. 219

viii Contents
 Self-Assessment .................................................................................................... 220

Expansion ................................................................................................................. 221

Timed Writing: An Essay about Body Language in Your Native Culture ......... 221
Summary Writing ...................................................................................................... 221

Chapter 10 Opinion Essays ........................................................................... 222

Introduction .............................................................................................................. 223

Analyzing the Model ................................................................................................. 223

Noticing Vocabulary: Collocations ...................................................................... 225

Organization ............................................................................................................ 226

Introductory Paragraphs in Opinion Essays ......................................................... 226
Body Paragraphs in Opinion Essays ..................................................................... 228
Concluding Paragraphs in Opinion Essays .......................................................... 230

Developing Supporting Details ........................................................................ 230

Quotations ................................................................................................................. 230
Statistics .................................................................................................................... 232

Applying Vocabulary: Using Collocations .......................................................... 235

Preparation for Writing ........................................................................................ 236

Conducting a Survey ............................................................................................... 236

Writing Assignment: An Opinion Essay about Getting a Good Education ...... 237

Self-Assessment .................................................................................................... 238

Expansion ................................................................................................................. 238

Timed Writing: An Opinion Essay about Homework .......................................... 238
Writing an Opinion for Publication ......................................................................... 239

Contents ix
 APPENDICES
Appendix A Grammar Terms ................................................................................... 240

Appendix B Sentence Types and Connecting Words ......................................... 243

Appendix C Connecting Words and Transition Signals ...................................... 246

Appendix D Punctuation Rules ............................................................................... 248

Appendix E Correction Symbols ............................................................................250

Appendix F Peer Review/ Writer's Self-Check Worksheets .............................. 253

Index ................................................................................................................................... 274

Credits ................................................................................................................................ 279

X Contents
 TO THE TEACHER

Welcome to the new edition of Level 3 in the Longman Academic Writing Series, a
five-level series that prepares English language learners for academic coursework.
This book, formerly called Introduction to Academic Writing, is intended for
intermediate students in university, college, or secondary school programs. It offers a
carefully structured approach that focuses on writing as a process. It teaches rhetoric
and sentence structure in a straightforward manner, using a step-by-step approach,
high-interest models, and varied practice types.
Like the previous editions, this book integrates instruction in paragraph and
essay organization and sentence structure with the writing process. It carefully
guides students through the steps of the writing process to produce the well­
organized, clearly developed paragraphs that are essential to academic writing
in English. You will find a wealth of realistic models to guide writers and clear
explanations supported by examples that will help your students through typical
rough spots. These explanations are followed by the extensive practice that learners
need to assimilate writing skills and write with accuracy and confidence. There are
interactive tasks throughout the text-pair work, small-group activities, and full­
class discussions-that engage students in the learning process and complement the
solitary work that writers must do. The tasks progress from recognition exercises to
controlled production and culminate in communicative Try It Out activities.
The first part of this book presents comprehensive chapters on how to format
and structure basic and specific types of academic paragraphs. Students will learn
how to organize different paragraph types, including narrative, process, definition,
cause/effect, and comparison/contrast paragraphs. In the second part, learners are
introduced to the basic concepts of essay writing. Finally, the extensive appendices
and a thorough index make the text a valuable and easy-to-use reference tool.

What's New in This Edition

Instructors familiar with the previous edition will find these new features:
• Chapter objectives provide clear goals for instruction;
• Two new vocabulary sections, Noticing Vocabulary and
Applying Vocabulary, explain specific types of vocabulary
from the writing models and support its use in the Writing
Assignment;
• Selected writing models have been updated or replaced, while
old favorites have been retained and improved;
• Try It Out! activities challenge students to be creative and apply
the skills they have studied;
• Writing Tips contain strategies that experienced writers use;
• Self-Assessments ask students to evaluate their own progress;
• Timed Writing practice develops students' writing fluency.

To the Teacher xi
 The Online Teacher's Manual
T he Teacher's Manual is available at www.pearsonELT.com/tmkeys. It includes
general teaching notes, chapter teaching notes, answer keys, reproducible writing
assignment scoring rubrics, and reproducible chapter quizzes.

Acknowledgments
We sincerely appreciate the contributions of the many people who have
helped shape the fourth edition of this book. First and foremost, we would like to
acknowledge Jane Curtis, for her tireless dedication to this book and the many new
models, practices, activities, and assignments that she contributed.
We are also grateful to the members of the Pearson ELT team for the expertise
and dedication they brought to this project, particularly Arny McCormick, Lise
Minovitz, Robert Ruvo, Shelley Gazes, and Eleanor Kirby Barnes. We would also like
to thank Joan Poole for her time, support, and guidance in developing this book.
To the many reviewers who contributed to our planning for this edition and
those whose thoughtful comments and suggestions on the previous editions also
helped to shape this book, we extend our heartfelt thanks: Rudy Besikof, UCSD
Extension, San Diego, California; Mary Brooks, Eastern Washington University,
Cheney, Washington; Donna M. Chappell, Madison, Wisconsin; J. Maxwell Couper,
Miami Dade College, Miami, Florida; Darla Cupery, Hope International University,
Fullerton, California; Rose Giambrone, Norwalk Community, College, Norwalk,
Connecticut; Carolyn Gibbs, City College of San Francisco, California; Patty
Heiser, University of Washington, Seattle, Washington; Connie Holy, Montgomery
College, Rockville, Maryland; Brian McDonald, Glendale Community College,
Pasadena, California; Susan Peterson, Baruch College, CUNY, New York, New York;
Kathleen Reardan-Anderson, Montgomery College, Rockville, Maryland; Sarah
Saxer, Howard Community College, Maryland; Dana Watson, Lansing Community
College, Lansing, Michigan; Terri Wells, University of Texas, Austin, Texas, Donna
Weyrich, Columbus State University, Columbus, Ohio.
We would also like to thank the following people for their feedback on our online
survey: Eric Ball, Langara College, British Columbia, Canada; Mongi Baratli, Al
Hosn University, Abu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates; Jenny Blake, Culture Works
ESL, London, Canada; Karen Blinder, English Language Institute, University of
Maryland, Maryland; Bob Campbell, Academic Bridge Program, Doha, Qatar;
Nancy Epperson, Truman College, Illinois; Kemal Erkol, Onsekiz Mart University,
C::anakkale, Turkey; Russell Frank, Pasadena City College, California; Jeanne Gross,
Canada College, California; Lisa Kovacs-Morgan, English Language Institute,
University of California at San Diego, California; Mary Ann T. Manatlao, Qatar
Foundation, Academic Bridge Program, Doha, Qatar; Brett Reynolds, Humber
Institute of Technology and Advanced Learning, Ontario, Canada; Lorraine C.
Smith, CUNY Queens College, New York.

Alice Oshima
Ann Hogue

xii To the Teacher

 CHAPTER OVERVIEW
Longman Academic Writing Series, Level 3, Paragraphs to Essays offers a
carefully structured approach to intermediate academic writing. It features
instruction on paragraph and essay organization, grammar, sentence
structure, mechanics, and the writing process.

- Four-color design makes the lessons even more engaging.

l
BASIC PARAGRAPH
STRUCTURE

To write academic texts, you need

Realistic writing models present the
to master certain skills.
type of writing students will learn to
In this chapter, you will learn to:
• Identify and write topic
sentences
produce in the end-of-chapter Writing
• Write supporting sentances
to explain o r prove the topic
Assignments.
sentence
• Identify and write concluding
sentences
• Use adjectives and adverbs in
sentences and paragraphs
INTRODUCTION
• Use detaited outlines to
structure paragraphs
ln Chapter 2, you learned about narrative paragraphs. Chapter 3 shows how to
• Write, revise, and edit an develop a topic by focusing on one main idea. In an academic paragraph, writers use
academic paragraph about a
hobby °' sport
a common style of organiution. They write a general statement to express their main
idea about a topic. They follow their topic sentence with supp orting information. Then
they conclude their paragraph with another general statement. At the end of Chapter 3,
you will write a paragraph with this basic structure.

ANALVZING THE MODEL

The writing model discusses the advantages of leisure time.

Read the model. Then answer the questions.

/writing Model

Take a Break!

1 In today's busy world, it Is easy to forget about the importance of taking time off. 2 Whether
it lasts tor a couple of hours or a few days, leisure time has specific benefits. 3 First of all,
relaxation reduces stress that can lead to serious health problems. 4 FOi" example, some people
spend a restful day watching movies or reading. 5 Others play sports. e Whatever the activity,
they begin to feel physically and emotionally stronger. 7 The nex1 benefit is creativity. e Individuals
with hobbles such as photography, travel, and music develop new talents and get ideas that
they can use at school or in the office. 9 Finally, Interests outside of work can lead to a positive
attitude. 10 For instance, when volunt&ers help children learn to read, they feel wonderful about
what they have achieved. 11 Then they feel llke working harder When they return to their regular
responsibilities. 12 All In all, leisure time helps people stay healthy and has the additional benefit ol
allowing them to work more industriously and productively.
-Chapter objectives provide clear
goals for instruction. Questions about the Model
1. Look at the t itle. What is the topic of the paragraph?
2. Look at the second sentence. What does it say about the topic?
3. Now look at the last sentence. Does i t summ.irize the main points or restate the
topic sentence in different words?

52 CHAPTER3

Chapter Overview xiii

 /Noticing Vocabulary: Adjectives
Adjectives add color and detail to your writing. Notice the boldface words in this
- Noticing Vocabulary points out useful
word parts, word types, and phrases from
excerpt from the writing mode!. They are all adjectives.
In today's busy wor1cl, it Is easy to forget about the Importance of
the writing models.
taking time off. Whether it lasts for a coupe of hours or a few days, lefsure
time has � benefits. First of all, relaxatlOO reduces stress that can
lead to serioua health problems. For example, some people spend a
restful day watching mov� or reading.
In some cases, you will recognize adjectives by their endings, or suffixes. For example,
the endings -al, -abll', -Jul, -ic, -iVt!, -ll'Ss, --ous, and -y often indicate that the word is
an adjective.

WQ·Mili3iM Identifying and Forming Adjectives

O Work with a partner. Underline five more adjectives In Sentences 9-12 of the
writing model. Circle any word endings that helped you Identify the word as an
adjective. Use yOUr dictionary as needed.

0) Work with a partrjer. Make the words adjectives. Use your dicttc>nary to check
the correct form and spelling. In some cases. there may be more than one
posslbkt correct �wer.

1. achieve achievable

2. benefit

J. create

4. energize
5. function ..pplying Vocabulary allows students
6. help to practice the new vocabulary and
1. produce
then use it in their Writing Assignments.

!
8. read

9. study

10. stress

/Applying Vocabulary: Using Adjectives

Before you begin your writing a55ignment, review what you learned about adjectives
on page 53.

MQ·M9I13iii Using Adjectives

G) Comptete the chert with ad}ecttvea. Use yOUf" dictk>o&wy as needed.

Mil M
Basic Paragraph Structur. 53

comfort comfort comfortable comfortably

enjoyment enjoy enjoyably
reliabmty ttly reliably
analysis analyze analytically

Word family charts help students expand spedfidly

negation
specify
negate
specifically
negatively
their vocabularies. use we usefully
direction dittct directly
caution caution cautiously

CD Write a true Nntence fCN' each topfc. In each aentence, tnclude one of the
adjectives from the chart.

1. My favorite hobby

2. My personality

3. My daily schedule

4, My biggest fear

S. My feeling about technology

6. My way to solve a problem

72 CKAPTEA3

xiv Chapter Overview

 Organization sections explore
paragraph and essay structure in a
variety of organizational patterns.

ORGANIZATION

A paragraph is like a sandwich. The topic sentence and concluding sentence are the
two pieces of ''bread" enclosing the "meat"-the supporting sentences.

Simple examples make the

concepts and rules easy to see
and remember.

The topic sentence presents the main idea of the paragraph. The supporting sentences
give information to explain or prove the main idea. The concluding sentence
summarizes the main idea or restates the topic sentence in different words.

THE TOPIC SENTENCE

The topic sentence is the most important sentence in a paragraph. It has two parts:
a topic and a controlling idea. The topic names the subject of the paragraph. In the
writing model on page 52, the topic is leisure time. The controlling idea tells the main
idea about the topic. It is called the controlling idea because it controls, or limits, the
topic to a very specific idea. In the model, the controlling idea is that leisure time
is beneficial.
Here are examples of topic sentences with the same topic but different controlling ideas: Writing Concluding Sentences
r- r
coi.-='" l
1a. Some hObbies are relaxing.
•OP,<: -----,
IIOO
Read the paragraph. Then write an appropriate concluding sentence on
the Hne.
,-10Poc;-----,j COff�IMCl 7
1b. Some hObbies are too expensive. Why Hybrids Are on th� Rise
r- TOf'lc; --,t CQN= 7
UN(;

2a. Some jobs are dangerous. There are three important factors behind the increase in popularity of

r_:-TOAC-,r--- CON1'.=�IIOO� hybrid cars. A belief in environmental protection is perhaps the primary factor
2b. Some Jobs are repetitive and boring.
when people choose a hybrid. Hybrid cars use a combination of gas and other
r- TOPIC -,i---- C�llNQ ----,
2c. Some jobs are perfect for students. fuels such as electricity. Therefore, they consume less gas and release less

carbon dioxide than cars with traditional gasoline engines. As a result, hybrids

cause less air pollution and less harm to the environment. The second factor
54 CHAPTER3
that drives consumers to buy hybrids is the desire to save money. With fuel

prices on the increase, motorists are looking for cars with better mileage, and

hybrids offer a good solution. For example, in city driving, a Toyota Prius can

go 53 miles on one gallon of gas, but a Toyota Corolla with a traditional engine

gets only 27 miles per gallon. Because hybrids use less gas, they are good not

Practice activities reinforce learning and only for� environment but also for the wallet. The third factor that causes

consumers to buy a hybrid is simply the cool factor. Certain car buyers like
lay the groundwork for the end-of-chapter the idea of having an automobile with modem technology. lney want to drive

Writing Assignments. a vehicle that is new and different. Owning a hybrid makes these consumers

feel special. ____________ _ _ _____

-Writing Tips provide useful strategies

--•an--lntho-­
c...e I effect pwagraph9 aa wry common but very dlfficul to wrtte.

By ualng a cuter dagram, you wll be able to have a nm complete

piettn of� and .rreeta..Then you can foc\JS on tM Important

to help students produce better writing. cai,,..e or effllCta In your paragraph.

1158 CHAPTER 7

Chapter Overview XV
 Sentence structure sections provide
practice with the most challenging
structures for intermediate students. This
includes writing varied sentences and
correcting run-ons and comma splices.

l
SENTENCE STRUCTURE
Good writers help their readers by dearly marking the beginning of each sentence with
a capital lettl'r and the ending of each sentence with a period. The capital letters and
the periods that identify the sentences in a paragraph arc important signals that allow
the reader to stop and think for a moment before moving on.

RUN-ON$ AND COMMA SPLICES

In Chapter 1, you learned about a sentence error called a frngmenl, or incomplefl" Editing practice allows students
sen/e11u. In !his chapter, you will learn how to avoid a run-on and a comma splice, two
mistakes that occur when a sentence should end but instead continues. to sharpen their revision and

l
A run-on happens when you join two simple sentences without a comma and without
a connecting word. A comma splice error happens when you join two simple sentences
with a comma alone.
proofreading skills.
AVN•OH Men like to shop quickly women like to take their time.
COMM,. s�ocr Men like to shop quickly, women like to take their time.

CORRECTING RUN-ONS AND COMMA SPLICES

There are three easy ways to correct run-ons and comma splices.
1. Join the two sentences with a comma and a coordinating conjunction such as and,
but, or so.
2. Make two sentences. Separate the two sentences with a period. MQ·f·iiii3M Editing a Paragraph for Consistency
3. Add a sentence connector (and a comma) to the second sentence, if you want to Find seven more consistency errors In the use of nouns and pronouns.
show the relationships between the two sentences. Make colTBClions.
cOR,.,c.,oNs Men like to shop quickly, but women like to take their time. Working .u ,11 Ret;ail Buyer
Men like to shop quickly, Women like to take their time.
Young people who are interested in fashion may want to consider
Men like to shop quickly. However, women like to take their time. bvyli"•f
working as a-buyer for retail stores. Retail buyers work for department stores

FINDING RUN-ONS AND COMMA SPLICES and large chain stores. They look for and choose the merchandise to sell in
the store. Retail buyers often specialize in one type or merchandise, such as
Correcting run-ons and comma splices is relatively easy. Finding them is often the real
challenge. Here are some tips to help you recognize run-ons and comma splices. men's casual clothing or women's shoes. You choose the merchandise that you
Check all sentences that have a comma in the middle. Ask yourself: What is the first
think will sell well in your stores and appeal to your customers. Buyers also
subicct in this sentence? What verb goes with ii? Ret1d further. Is there another subject
with its own verb? If the answer is yes, look for a coordinating conjunction. If there is travel to trade shows and fashion shows to look at merchandise. He or she will
none, then this is a run-on sentence.
purcht1se products about six months before the merchandise appears in the

stores. You need to be able to predict fashion trends, understand retail sales,

and work cooperatively with managers in sales, advertising, and marketing.

96 CHAPTER◄
Placing and Punctuating Transition Signals Correctly
Transition signals are like traffic signals. They tell your reader when to slow down,
tum around, and stop. You have already used several transition signals. The chart
presents those you know and a few new ones.

Sr•,TfN' • Co••••<CTO'l" C)OIH>'•'' •, O••••u�

C(l•• 1u•H , n"
'lb __ ....,.. .. __
First (second, etc.), To begin with,
First of all,
Transition signal charts help students Later,
Meanwhile,
use connecting words and write more Next,
After that,
coherently. Now
Soon
Then
Finally,

(contin1ted on nt:xt pt:1gt)

xvi Chapter Overview

 Preparation for Writing sections teach
prewriting techniques for gathering and
organizing information.

!
PREPARATION FOR WRITING
TI,cre arc many ways to gather ideas and begin to organiz� them before you start writing
an academic paragraph. In Chapter� I and 2, you lt•amed to use /isling andfreewriti11g as
pre,,., ,riting tc.'Chniqucs to get ideas. In Ch,,ptcr J, you learned about n11tlini11g as a way of
organizing a paragr;iph. Nm._, you will learn ,1nothcr helpful prC'oVriting technique.

CLUSTERING
Clustering is a way to come up with ideas in ,,n organized way. It looks on the page
a bit the way il feels when you arc thinking of lots of ideas. When you use clustering,
you start by writing your topic in a circle in the middk of your paper. As you think of
related ideas, you write these ideas in sm.:iller circles <Hound the first circle. The related
idea in each small circle may produce even more ideas and, therefore, more circles
around it. When you h,wc nm oul of ideas, yot1r paper might look something like this
diagram. The writing model on pages 122-123 came from ideas in this diagram. Try It Out! activities challenge students to

l
apply what they have learned.

Nr;'4i4■jij@ On a separate sheet of paper, practice the clustering technique to develop a

topic for the writing assignment. Follow the instructions:
1. Choose one of the suggested topics. Write the topic in a laq;e circlt' in the CL'nter.
2. Think about the topic for one or two minutes. TI1en write each new idea th,11
comes into your mind in sm:iller circles around the lar�c cirde.
3. TI1ink about the idea in ench smaller circle for one or two minutes. \.Vrite .'.Hl\' new
ide,1s in en"n smaller circles.
4. Look over your groups of cirdt>S. Which groups han.• the lnri;est number l,f ideas?
These nre probably the most productive ideas fN your par.isrnph

Tones
You can see that the writer thought about what courage is. She thought of words and • a word that dest:ribcs your home culture
phrases that were linked in her mind with courage. She ,11s0 thought of examples of • an important term from your major field of study
people who had shm,•n courage, including people from the past ,1nd present, well­ • ,1 definition of what a good tc,1cher i s
known heroes, and someone from her own life. Therefore, she decided that the best
• a definition o f culture shock
way to organize and write her paragraph was to begin with a definition of courage
and then to explain the definition with examples. She chose to put the examples of • what !he word s11cces.� means to you
well-known people and heroes first. Then she presented a hero from her own life. The • a definition of n wh:H a lender is
writer didn't include all of her prewriling ideas in the p:irngraph. She also add£.>d some
information to her par.igrnph that was not part of the prewriting.

7
Definition Paragraphs 143
WRITING ASSIGNMENT

Yoll are going to write a definition paragrnph .1bout a word. cnnccpt, or custom Follow
the steps in the writing process.

STEP 1: Prewrite to get ideas.

Step-by-step Writing Assignments Use the cluster diagram that you compktcd in the Try It Out! ,Klivity ,ibow. H you
need to develop your topic further, continue working on your di,1grnm until you are
satisfied with it. Highlight the ideas on the diagram th,11 you !ik(! the most.
make the writing process clear and
easy to follow. STEP 2: Organize your ideas.
Use the information in your cluster diagram to make ;i detai.!ed outline of your lopic.
• Include the definition that you will use in your p.iragraph.
• Add your support. The support c.,n give <1ddition,1l information
by telling who, w/1111, ;i•ilt.'fl', when , lwfl'. or why or by prf'�1mting ,1
process, exmnplt.>s, or a dC'Scriptic,n.
• Use your outline to guide you as you write.

144 CHAPTER 6

Chapter Overview xvii

 Write STEP 3: Write the first draft.
• Write FIRST DRAFT at the top of your paper.
• Begin your par.:agraph with a topic sentence. Use the definition
from your cluster diagram. As needed, modify the definition so
that it is like the ones you wrote in Practice 4 on page 1.26.
• Fm unity, pwsent your supporting information in a logical order.
• Use transition signals to make your paragraph coherent
• Try to include a word origin and/or idiom that goes well with
your topic.
• Pay attention to sentence structure. Include a variety of sentence
patterns: simple, compound, and complex sentences. Use
adjective clauses and ,ippositin�s. Punctuate them correctly.
• Write a conclusion that tells why the topic is important,
interesting, or unique.
• Write a title. It should clearly identify your topic. For examples,
look at the titles of the models in this chapter Peer Review and Writer's Self-Check
STEP 4: Revise and edit the draft.
Worksheets at the back of the book help
• Exchange piipcrs with a d;1ssmate and ask him or her to check
your first draft using the Chapter 6 Pe(>r Review on page 264. students collaborate and sharpen their
Then discuss the completed Peer Review and decide what
changes you should make. Write a se-<"ond draft. revision skills.
• Use the Chnpter 6 Writer's Self-Check on page 265 to check
your second draft for format. organiz.1tion, content, gramm.1r,
punctu.1tion, c.1pit,,lizalion, spelling, and sentence structure.

Wrtte STEP 5: Write a new draft.

Write a new copy with your final revisions .1nd edits. Proofread it, fix any errors, .1nd
hand it in along with your first ,Ulcl sixond drafts. Yom teachl'r may also ask you to
hand in your prcwriting papers ,ind the P('('r Review and Writer's Self-Check.

-Self-Assessment encourages students to

SELF-ASSESSMENT ◄f-----11�---
In this chapter, you learned to: eva I uate their progress.
0 Identify and produce clear definitions
0 Use appositives correctly
0 Identify and write complex sentences with adjective clauses
0 Use commas around extra information
0 Write, revise, and edit a paragraph that defines a word,
concept, or custom
Which ones can you do wefl? Mark them@
Which ones do you need to practice more? Mark them Q) EXPANSION

Definition Paragraphs 145 • TIMED WRITING

As you leilmed in previous chapters, you n� to write quickly to succeed in academic
writing. For example, sometimes you must write a p.uagraph for a tesl in class, and
you only have 30, 40, or 50 minutes.
In this expansion, you will write a well-org,rnizt.-d paragraph in class. You will have
30 minutes. To complele the expansion in time, follow the directions.
1. Read the wriling prompt (or the prompt your te,1cher assigns) c<Uefolly. Make sure
you understand the question or task. Then begin to think about your response.
(2 minutes)
2. Use clustering to dcvl'lop the topic and to gather information about it. TI1\m
organize your information into a detailed outline. (9 minutes)
3. Write your par,1graph. Be sure that it has a t,tle, a topic sentence, support, and a
conclusion. Use a variel>• of 5Cntence patterns: simple, compound, and complex.
Include adjl'Ctive clauses and transition !>ign.1ls. (15 minutes)
4. l.:Cvise and (-<lit your p.iragraph. Correct any mistakes. (4 minutes)
.imed Writing activities help prepare 5. Give your paper to your 1£'.icher.

students to write well on tests. Prompt: Whal is the meaning of the wordfi1111i/y? Write your definition. Then gi\'e
details to e .\'.plain.

• PARAPHRASING
A paraphrase is a rcst,1tement or an cxplan,1tion of ,lnother person's writing or sprech.
Unlike a summary. a paraphr,1sc contains both the main ideas and the details from .1n
original printed or spoken text. In som� ca5Cs, a par,1phrase may be longer than the
original text. When you paraphrase writing or speech, you use your own words and
sentence structure to present all of the original information.
The nbility to par. iphrase is a necessary academic skill. You will need to use it, for
example, when you take exams or do research. Paraphrasing allows you to explain
complicated information in :,n understandable way and make clear connections
...dditional writing tasks encourage behvecn your ideas and the ideas of others.
By paraphrasing, you can also avoid the serious problem of plagiarism, or copying
students to further develop the writing work that is not your own. When you wrote definitions in this chapter, you may have
looked at a dictionary or talked to native English speakers. instead of simply repeating

skills in each chapter.

what you learned, you explained it in your own words. You paraphrased.
Look at this example of a par.iphrase.
OA•G"'•� We can all think of courageous people from history.
""'""""•SE Everyone can give examples of historical figures who were brave.

146 CHAPTER 6

xviii Chapter Overview

 WRITING A
PARAGRAPH

I
'
 ACADEMIC PARAGRAPHS

To write academic texts, you need

to master certain skills.
In this chapter, you will learn to:
• Identify and use correct
page formats for academic
paragraphs
• Use capitalization correctly
• Identify and write simple
sentences
• Check for and correct errors in
subject-verb agreement
• Check for and correct
fragments
• Write, revise, and edit an
academic paragraph about
someone who has made a
difference

How did George Lucas change moviemaking forever?

INTRODUCTION

Each day you probably do many kinds of informal writing. For example, you may
make lists of things to buy at the supermarket or send text messages to your friends.
Informal writing may contain slang, abbreviations, and incomplete sentences. In
contrast, academic writing-the type of writing you have to do in school-is formal
and has many rules. It is different from everyday English, and it may be different from
the academic writing that you have done in your native language.
This book will help you learn and practice the format, sentence structure, and
organization appropriate for academic writing. Chapter 1 presents the basic format
and features of an academic paragraph. At the end of this chapter, you will write an
academic paragraph of your own.

ANALYZING THE MODEL

The writing model is about a well-known person who has made a difference.
Read the model. Then answer the questions.

/ Writing Model
I I I I
• 2 , . , 1 3 , 1 , 1 1 , , 4 1 , , 1 ' 5 ' I I I I 66 I I

A Person Who Has Made a Difference: George Lucas

'
'
1 Filmmaker George Lucas has changed the film industry in many ways. 2 He has written,

directed, and produced some of the best-loved movies of our time. 3 He has also made major
contributions to modern film technology. 4 At first, Lucas did not plan to become a filmmaker.
5 His dream was to become a racecar driver. 6 After a bad accident, however, he had to modify
his plans, and he decided to get an education. 7 In college, Lucas studied moviemaking and
made a number of student films. 8 Lucas's third feature film, Star Wars, changed everything.
9 A seemingly simple story of good versus evil, Star Wars became a huge international hit. 10 The
movie used new technologies that revolutionized the film industry. 11 One of these technologies
was a special computer-assisted camera crane (a tall machine with a long metal arm for lifting ·'

heavy things). 12 Camera operators filmed most of the space fight scenes from the crane. 13 Lucas
is also responsible for the modern THX audio system, which improves the way a movie sounds
in theaters. 14 In addition, Lucas was one of the first people to use computer-generated images
(CGI) in filmmaking. 15 In fact, Lucas's company Industrial Light and Magic has created special
effects for hundreds of movies including Harry Potter, Pirates of the Caribbean, and Star Trek
films. 16 To sum up, George Lucas's love of storytelling and his technological innovations have

completely changed moviemaking forever.

Academic Paragraphs 3

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�