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 Epic
facts &
tales
inside!
BOOK OF
 Welcome to

VIKINGS
BOOK OF

kings is one that is

HE LEGEND of the Vi
T shrouded in mystery. Th
have embedded themselve
eir stories and myths
s in popular culture,
we see in films, books
and those are the Vikings
l Vikings – the Norse
and TV shows. But the rea
ce that was often more
seafarers – led an existen
nal tale. In this book, we
incredible than any fictio
origins in Scandinavia
tell that story, from their
the seas. Known to be
to their expeditions across
ss fighters, discover how
ruthless raiders and fearle
empire and conquered
the Vikings expanded their
cinating facts and
new lands. Packed with fas
t what caused the end
stunning imagery, find ou
eir remaining legacy is,
of the Viking age, what th
al artefacts that help us
and gaze upon the historic
ese incredible warriors.
understand more about th
 BOOK OF

VIKINGS Future Publishing Ltd

Richmond House
33 Richmond Hill
Bournemouth
Dorset BH2 6EZ
+44 (0) 1202 586200
Website www.futureplc.com
Creative Director Aaron Asadi
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Edited by Amy Best & Fiona Hudson
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Disclaimer
The publisher cannot accept responsibility for any unsolicited material lost or
damaged in the post. All text and layout is the copyright of Future Publishing
Limited. Nothing in this bookazine may be reproduced in whole or part without
the written permission of the publisher. All copyrights are recognised and used
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This bookazine is published under licence from Carlton Publishing Group Limited.
All rights in the licensed material belong to Carlton Publishing Limited and it may
not be reproduced, whether in whole or in part, without the prior written consent of
Carlton Publishing Limited. © 2016 Carlton Publishing Limited.

The content in this bookazine has previously appeared in the Carlton books Viking
World: The Age of Seafarers & Sagas and The Viking Experience

All About History Book Of Vikings Fourth Edition

© 2016 Future Publishing Limited

Part of the

bookazine series
 Contents
Prologue
VIKING RAIDERS
Chapter I
ORIGINS OF THE
SCANDINAVIAN NATIONS
Chapter II
EXPLORATION
Chapter III
RAIDING & TRADING
Chapter IV
SETTLEMENT ABROAD
Chapter V
EVERYDAY LIFE
Chapter VI
END OF THE VIKING AGE
Chapter VII
THE VIKING LEGACY
Chapter VIII
EXHIBITS
Prologue

PORTRAYED AS BLOODTHIRSTY PIRATES, PILLAGING

INNOCENT VILLAGERS, VIKINGS ALSO RULED THE WAVES
WITH A LUCRATIVE TRADE NETWORK

T
8 he great white sail cracked as the
vicious Atlantic wind lashed against
Norse tribesmen as rapists and pillagers is so
prevailing that it’s often forgotten that the word
it, but still the ship sailed on. Long and Viking itself means to go on an expedition. It
sleek, the warship, crafted from mighty oak, is easy to fall into the assumption that these
crashed through the waves, sending a sharp people were nothing more than pirates – taking
spray of water across the deck. The men inside from those too weak to defend themselves. And
rowed as one, their mighty muscles straining as it is undeniable that this happened: the Viking
they plunged the oars deep into the water and invaders sailed from Scandinavia to coasts of
drove the ship forward through the turbulent the British Isles and beyond, invading villages
waves. Their strength alone brought the ship and monasteries, killing the inhabitants and
to land and they poured out onto the beach. stealing their riches. It’s spoken about in first-
Dressed in thick woollen tunics, the warriors hand accounts and it’s still being evidenced
were armed with an array of weapons, from today in the reams of Viking hoards discovered
long sharpened spears to hefty battle-axes. from anxious townsfolk who hurried to hide
With a booming voice one man yelled to the their riches from the merciless invaders.
others, thrusting his sword into the air, and However, this only tells half the story. Two
the rest bellowed in response. Then onward things powered the Viking civilisation: the
he ran, as the united force thundered uphill vicious raids they’re famous for, and something
against the billowing wind. Their destination? else – trade. Not only did Vikings set up new
A coastal monastery bursting full of gold, gems colonies in the lands they invaded, but they also
and hefty food supplies ripe for the taking, and created powerful trade routes that helped their
only a collection of quiet, unassuming monks nation to become one of the most prosperous in
to protect it. the world.
This image of monstrous invaders laying For the majority of the year, the same Vikings
siege to innocent monasteries and pillaging who had pillaged the towns worked the land,
them of their precious items is the first one tirelessly toiling in the field, or creating intricate
that leaps to mind when many are confronted and valuable ornaments and jewellery to fund
with the word ‘Viking’. The portrayal of the their blossoming civilisation.
 Viking Raiders

Vicious
Vikings
Meet Scandinavia’s most
terrifying plunderers
Erik the Red 951 – 1003
Infamous for: Being
exiled from Iceland for
murder. He went on to
colonise Greenland

Guthrum Unknown – 890

Infamous for: Waging
war against the king
of the West Saxons –
Alfred the Great

Ingvar the Far-Travelled

Unknown
Infamous for:
Pillaging the shores
of the Caspian Sea

Rodulf Haraldsson
Unknown – 873
Infamous for:
9
Leading raids in
Britain, France
and Germany
Ivar the Boneless
Unknown
Infamous for:
Invading Anglo-
Saxon kingdoms of
England using the
Great Heathen Army

"Two things powered the

Viking civilisation: the vicious
raids they’re famous for, and
something else – trade"
Prologue

AS EXPERT SHIP BUILDERS, THE VIKINGS WERE ABLE TO VOYAGE

FURTHER AND WIDER THAN ANY CIVILISATION BEFORE…

C
enturies before Christopher Columbus meat with water, beer or sour milk to drink.
would stumble upon the land now The sinking of vessels was no great tragedy,
known as America, the Vikings had but rather expected on long journeys. There
claimed the Atlantic Ocean as their own would be no rescue sent as usually nobody
backyard. They had mastered Russia’s river knew about sunken ships for weeks, months
system and reached the Middle East; their or even years. It was not unusual for any
impressive voyages helped them to become number of ships to go missing on voyages
leaders of a rapidly developing world and this across the brutal Atlantic Ocean. When Erik
new Viking civilisation thrived on the power of the Red travelled to Greenland, only 14 of his
a single creation: the ship. original 25 ships managed to arrive safely.
The entire Viking society was built around However, it was the determination and
their ships, which were bigger, lighter and hardiness of the voyagers willing to take
faster than any before. These vessels had been these risks that led the Vikings to valuable
perfected over many years, with the power to and exotic treasures and trade lying along
brave the vicious storms of the Atlantic Ocean, the coastlines of the world. Toward the end
but also the sleek construction to skim through of the 8th century, Viking voyagers began
shallow rivers. These powerful and efficient an invasion of England that would forever
ships enabled their mighty passengers to create determine the fate of the island nation. By 860
10 colonies all over the world, and the building and
maintaining of these vessels became the basis
this pioneering spirit led them to the assault
of Constantinople, then some 20 years later, in
of Viking society. 885, Viking ships attacked the mighty city of
Vikings were using their mighty sea power Paris. Driven by the quest for trade, territory,
to trade around the coast of Europe while plunder and a thirst for adventure, the impact Wooden hull
the British Empire was merely a collection of of these historic voyages can still be felt All Viking ships were made in the
scattered kingdoms unable to defend their around the world today. same way, using planks of oak or pine
shores. The Viking sailors were aware that it overlapped and nailed together. The ships
were then reinforced and made watertight
was often easier to take the same journey by
by using tarred wool or other animal furs
water rather than land, with some journeys
to fill in the gaps between the planks.
taking five days by sea, compared
to a month on land, and they
Frightening figurehead
used this to their advantage.
The front of the ship was often
Longer voyages were carried
decorated with a carving of an
out by those settling in strange animal head, usually a mix
and exciting foreign lands, and the between a dragon and a snake.
Viking civilisation spread to Iceland, These figureheads were removable
Greenland, and even to Canada and and would only be put up when
North America. the ship was approaching land, as
The image of a Viking longboat they risked heavy damage while
crashing through the waves with its out at sea.
fierce dragon figurehead and its long,
sleek curves is certainly an inspiring one,
but for those onboard, life was not quite
so glamorous. With no shelter, at night the
sailors used the sail as a makeshift tent that
they would sleep under, shivering beneath
blankets or animal skin sleeping bags. The
only sustenance would be dried or salted
 Viking Raiders

Steering oar
This rudder-like oar, also known
as a ‘steerboard’, was attached
to the back of the ship on the
starboard side. It was used to
steer the ship and would require a
large amount of physical exertion
compared to modern alternatives.
The position of the ‘steerboard’
is where the term ‘starboard’
originated from.

Keel for strength

The keel of the ship would be made first
and provided the ship with strength
beneath the waterline, while also allowing
navigation in shallow waters. Sometimes
ships would feature a false outer keel,
which would take the brunt of the wear
Oars for speed when ships were drag ged onto beaches.
Oars differed in length
depending on where they
would be used. There were no
seats on Viking ships, so the
oarsmen sat on storage chests. 11
Oars were usually used to gain
speed quickly when near a
coast or in a river, then stored
out of place when out at sea.

Small hold
The longship was designed for war, so it was vital for
it to be fast. Because of this, they had a small loading
capacity, with room for only high value goods and
booty. The merchant ships would be able to carry far
more cargo, with room for livestock.

Oarports
These were holes for the oars
that ran along the entire
length of the ship on both
sides. The holes would also
be used to tie shields in place,
but only when the ships were
in port as the risk of losing
their vital protection while
the ship was in motion was
too great.
 d
A dramatic Viking rai
on the Engli sh coast

NO MONASTERY WAS SAFE FROM THE

FIERY SCOURGE THAT SWEPT OVER
THE LAND FROM BEYOND THE SEA

T
hey had arrived in the dead of night; and blood as they swung their axes and jabbed treasures was an opportunity too good to miss,
the darkness had been so thick that their swords. One brother alone had managed but for many in England this shocking and
the monks had not seen their ship to escape the massacre. He speedily weaved unprovoked attack marked the beginning of
until it landed on the shore. It was too late, they through the figures and threw himself down the scourge of Viking raids. These sporadic but
all knew it, to call for help. A brother had run into the tall grass outside. He watched as body violent assaults continued across the coasts
into the halls, waking the monks from their after body was thrown from the doors of his of England, and by 855 a force known as the
beds with shrill cries of “The demons are here! home; he watched as men still alive were cast Great Heathen Army had arrived in East Anglia.
They’re coming! They’re coming!” Some of off the high cliff into the sea; and he watched The army made their way across the country,
the brothers began to scream for help, while as the heathens set the holy walls alight with capturing cities as they went, overrunning
others leapt into action, grabbing precious flame. The hot wind lashed against his face and and overpowering the land. The Scandinavian
items and concealing them in the folds of their robes in the flickering darkness. He grasped a warriors also launched invasions across the
cloaks. But already the doors were down and golden chalice in his hands numbly, the only coasts of Ireland and all over mainland Europe.
already the invaders were here. They were huge thing he had been able to rescue before fleeing. These raids even stretched to the Baltic Sea
– bigger than any man the humble brethren The invaders had the rest of it, all the precious and Persia. The initial reasons for such rapid
had ever seen – with their wild blond hair items loaded into sacks on their large ships. expansion are hotly contested between
and mighty weapons grasped in hand. They And almost as quickly as they had arrived, they historians, with some believing the raids were a
leapt upon the monks immediately, hacking slipped away from the shore and returned to brutal response to the spread of Christianity, or
at their bodies with a frenzied ferocity. Some the darkness. that the Scandinavian population grew too large
pleaded for mercy, some did not have time In 793, a Viking crew sailing near northeast for their land or perhaps they were the actions
to plead. There was no time for negotiations; England raided a Christian monastery at of men simply drawn by the thrill of adventure.
how can one negotiate with pure, unbridled Lindisfarne. For the Vikings the strange, Whatever the reasons, the invasions left a
violence? There was only death, destruction exposed building packed full of valuable lasting scar on those who lived to see them.
 Viking Raiders

To see more of © Stian Dahlslett ‘s work visit www.dahlslett.com

HOW THE
VIKINGS
RAIDED
PREPARATION
1 VIKINGS DID not strike
haphazardly; instead their raids
were planned down to the finest detail.
They would first identify a weak target
to attack along the coasts which they
knew perfectly. Because they had the
fastest ships in the world they would
launch their attack without any prior
warning, ensuring that no help could
reach their targets in time. Towards
the mid-9th century these attacks had
escalated to great fleets of three to four
hundred ships.

GATHER HORSES
2 VIKING SHIPS were designed to
row up river, but if the target was
some distance away they would leave
their ships and travel by horse. With
no horses on the ships, they would
raid nearby villages for available
mounts. These would be used to
transport themselves and their booty
across the land.

SURPRISE ATTACK
13
3 THE PIOUS and humble
monks did not stand a chance
faced with their fierce opponents
Helmet
Vikings did not, in
fact, have horned
Hair
Long hair was
favoured by both
Armour
Mail shirts or metal
armour would have
Shoes
Shoes were most
often made from
Shield
Round shields were
common and were
armed with superior weapons. The men and women. been very expensive one long piece made from light
helmets. Instead,
well-trained Vikings would launch they were round It would also be for the average of leather sewn wood, such as fir
a sudden furious, vicious attack on with a guard around acceptable to shave raider, as would to the shape of or poplar and were
the monastery, slaying the holy men. the eyes and nose. one’s hair or to leather, so these the wearer’s foot. reinforced with
Some would be stripped naked, and There is only one wear it rolled in a were reserved only Leather straps leather or iron
cast outside, some taken prisoner, and complete Viking tight bun near the for those of high would be used to around the edge.
others thrown into the sea. helmet in existence nape of their neck. status. Ordinary secure the boot Round shields could
– others may have Men would also Vikings likely to the foot, and get as large as
LOOT AND BURN been passed down carefully groom fought wearing their thick woollen socks 120cm in diameter,

4 ONCE THE monks were dealt

with, Vikings ravaged and
pillaged everything they could. They
through families
then sold for scrap.
their moustaches
and beards.
everyday clothes,
made from wool.
were worn to keep
heat in.
but most were
around 75 to 90cm.

plundered any valuables they could

The attack on Lindisfarne

get their hands on, including storages
of food, but especially precious relics.
However, they often ignored the Lindisfarne is a holy island off the northeast
incredibly valuable bibles. Once they
had looted the buildings they set fire
coast of England, and was a Christian hub
to the monasteries and the villages during the Middle Ages. However, in 793
surrounding them. Viking raiders sent a wave of dismay to
wash over Christians worldwide when they
ESCAPE
5 LADEN DOWN with their
prisoners and booty, the Vikings
would ride back to their ships, load
invaded the monastery there and “destroyed
God’s church on Lindisfarne, with plunder and slaughter.” Although the
attack was not the first in the country, it was unusual in that it attacked the
them and sail away. They would heart of the Christian nation in the north. A contemporary scholar wrote,
later sell the gold, jewels and sacred “Never before has such terror appeared in Britain as we have now suffered
emblems, and the monks would also
from a pagan race. The heathens poured out the blood of saints around the
fetch a high price in the European
slave market.
altar, and trampled on the bodies of saints in the temple of God.”
Prologue

What were the goods worth?

1 FEMALE SLAVE
= 1 COW AND 1 OX
1 SUIT OF CHAIN MAIL
= 2 HORSES OR
4 MALE SLAVES
1 HORSE = 3 COWS
1 STIRRUP = 1 SWORD
OR 125G OF SILVER

WALRUS IVORY, WHALEBONE, FINLAND

ANIMAL FUR, ANIMAL SKIN

NORWAY

ANIMAL SKIN

SWEDEN
SOAPSTONE

SCOTLAND
RUSSIA

DENMARK

WHEAT, WOOL, HONEY,

TIN POLAND

ENGLAND

GERMANY

SLAVES
UKRAINE

FRANCE

SALT, WINE SILVER, WINE

TURKEY

WINE, SPICES
 Viking Raiders

Raiders or traders?
Stuart Perry, or Fastulf
Geraltsson as he is known
to the public, is the Jorvik
Group’s Interactive Team
Leader. He manages a team of
Viking interactives at Jorvik
Viking Centre and archaeology
and history interpreters across
the group’s five attractions

What was the motivation behind the Viking

invasions? Were they simply bloodthirsty
raiders, or did they have more civilised aims?
The motivation behind the Viking invasions was
simple; farmland. The Vikings, or Norsemen –
which is a more accurate name since a ‘Viking’
was a sea-borne raider that specialised in hit-
and-run attacks – were searching for land.
Scandinavia is not rich in arable land – there
is simply too much water and too many Vikings were
Evidence shows that
mountainous regions to support a population ny go ods
exp ert traders of ma
over a certain size. The Vikings had been
raiding the coast of England since 793 – the
famous attack on Lindisfarne – and would VIKINGS WERE NOT POWERED BY
have had plenty of opportunity to see the
abundance of good farmland, healthy crops and
BRUTALITY, BUT INSTEAD A COMPLEX
fat cattle all over the country. Combine this AND PROSPEROUS TRADE NETWORK

A
with the riches presented in the monasteries lthough raiding and pillaging vicious rapids and battling hostile natives. The
and towns they were so fond of raiding and provided a quick intake of wealth, Vikings continued their trading journey inland,
England became a perfect area for expansion. it was not a stable way to live bringing their goods to Jerusalem and Baghdad.
As for being ‘bloodthirsty raiders’, there is or to build a civilisation. Instead, the The lure of the Silk Road and the exotic riches of the
that element to the culture, yes, but it was
not simply for violence that the Vikings went
Vikings dedicated far more of their time
to building up a prosperous and powerful
East were too good to resist, and Vikings met with
traders from the Far East in their trading centres in
15
raiding. It was for profit. Rarely would the trading network. Because of their Russia, trading fur and slaves for silk and spices.
Vikings destroy an entire settlement, and the superior ship-building skills they were Silver coins were the most common form of
reason is simple; they wanted to come back able to travel to trade in faraway lands, payment, but this was unlike today’s currency
and do it again! Raiding was a job for young obtaining a host of exotic and valuable where different coins are worth a particular value.
impetuous men – but it was not the main focus goods. Their specially designed trading The coins were weighed in scales to determine
of life in early medieval Scandinavia. It is this ships were able to carry up to 35 tonnes of their value; this is because a lot of coins were
message that we convey at every opportunity cargo, including silver and even livestock. melted down and crafted into intricate and
here at Jorvik Viking Centre. Trading markets began to emerge beautiful jewellery to trade on. The great extent of
along the west Baltic Sea in the mid-8th the Viking trade network can be seen today in the
century where people came from far and hoards of silver coins, created in England, which
wide to trade an array of goods. As these markets have been found in Sweden, not to mention the
flourished, traders decided to settle permanently 40,000 Arabic coins and the 38,000 German coins
along the routes and they transformed into trading also uncovered there. Nordic bowls, Mediterranean
towns. Birka in Sweden, Kaupang in Norway and silk and Baltic axe heads have even been
SILVER Hedeby in Denmark all grew to be prosperous and discovered buried under English soil.
bustling trading settlements, with the inhabitants This vast and illustrious trade network
all working as craftsmen and merchants. Prosperous attracted a wealth of eager and talented artists
trading routes also emerged along the British and craftsmen. Viking bead-makers would import
Isles, with York and Dublin two of the ports that glass from Western Europe to create an array of
developed into major trading centres. simple and decorative beads for the wealthy to
As the trade boom increased the Vikings travelled adorn themselves with, while the ample supply
further afield, across the Baltic Sea and along the of amber from the Baltic lands was fashioned
Russian rivers. They founded more trading towns in into pendants and playing pieces. Skilled Viking
Kiev and Novgorod. The Viking traders even went as craftsmen transformed their imported bronze to
SILK, SILVER, SPICES
far as Istanbul, the capital of the mighty Byzantine fine ornaments and mass-produced brooches, and
Empire across the Black Sea. This perilous journey deer antlers could even be used to make delicate
© Sol 90 Images; Abigail Daker; Alamy

was one only the Vikings dared attempt, through and beautiful combs.
 Chapter I
ORIGINS OF THE
SCANDINAVIAN NATIONS
D ISCOVER HOW the Scandinavian nations came
to be, and learn about the Viking origin myth,
alongside the reality of the Stone Age settlers.
Chapter I

ORIGINS OF THE
SCANDINAVIAN NATIONS
THE VIKING ORIGIN MYTH STONE AGE AND BRONZE

A
dynasty, known to many from Wagner’s Ring
CCORDING TO Snorri Sturluson, Cycle. Then he travelled to Denmark, where he AGE SCANDINAVIA
writing in the thirteenth century, the established his son Skiöld as king and from him In reality, settlers in Scandinavia first arrived
origin of the Norse gods can be traced the Skiöldung dynasty, which we know from in the Stone Age, following the end of the last
to a Trojan prince called Tror, grandson of King the Old English epic Beowulf, was descended. ice age. These settlers were nomadic hunter-
Priam. Tror’s many times-great grandson was Odin then travelled to Sweden, where he gatherers, who followed the reindeer herds
Woden, whom the Norse called Odin. Odin had established himself before moving on and and exploited the resources of vast territorial
the gift of prophecy and knew that if he travelled setting up sons as rulers of Sweden and Norway. areas up to approximately 100,000 square
to north west Europe he would be remembered Thus, according to Scandinavian legend, all kilometres (39,000 square miles). They had
for all time, so he set off with a large following. rulers in the north were descended from Odin, reached southern Sweden by 14,000 years ago
Odin stopped in Frankia where he fathered and, because of his success, Odin became and, over the following 5,000 years, worked
three sons, who were the origin of the Völsung revered as a god. their way northwards, adapting their lifestyles

Bronze Age rock car vin

gs fro m Vitlyck e,
Sweden, of ships. Ro we
rs are depicted
kn eeli ng in them as up
right strok es. On e
ship in the centre has a
18 wa rriors blo wing lur hor
cre w that includes
ns. The design
of the ships is the same
as that of the Iro n
Age Hjortspring boat.
 Origins of the scandinavian Nations

HORNED HELMETS
Most people know that Vikings did not wear
horned helmets, yet the myth persists and
the image of a stout Norseman with horned
helmet still appears in, among other things,
advertising and cartoons. This image arose in
the nineteenth century as part of Scandinavian
romanticism and has been credited to Carl
Doepler, who designed the costumes for the
first production of Wagner’s Ring Cycle. Before
this time, and before the coining of the term
“Viking Age” in 1876, horned helmets were
the province of early Germanic warriors. They
had been depicted with these helmets from at
least the sixteenth century onwards, because
early scholars assumed that descriptions of
An iron helmet decorated with bronze plaques.
The helmet was found at Vendel, Sweden, and
Celts wearing adorned helmets also included
dates from the mid-si xth centur y. The plaques the Germanic tribes. So, when the Viking took
depict warrio rs fighting and may represent an centre stage in popular culture, he was quickly
initiation ritual that the wearer underwent. associated with the horned helmet, even
though no examples of Viking Age helmets
to the coastal landscape in which they found Romania, and miniature axes from the with horns have ever been found.
themselves. From c. 8000 BC–6000 BC, the eastern Mediterranean or Bulgaria. Similarly, Horned helmets do exist, however. A Bronze
landscape of Scandinavia changed to resemble Scandinavian amber has been found as far Age statuette of a kneeling figure wearing a
more the landscape we know today, as forests
started to cover the tundra and the sea level
afield as Mycenae and Pylos in Greece. This
clearly shows that the Scandinavians did not
helmet with large curving horns on its sides
was found at Grevensvænge in Denmark. Two 19
rose. Around 4000 BC agricultural practices live in isolation from the rest of Europe and helmets found at Viksø in Denmark, dating
from central Europe began to be adopted, that trade was an important part of life, as it from c. 1000 BC, confirmed that horned
although they did not become important was later too. helmets existed. Many of the Bronze Age
elements of the economy until c. 3100 BC. Ritual life is represented by finds like the
Space for farms was cleared by burning the Trundholm sun chariot (c. 1800 BC–1600
vegetation, crops like wheat and barley began BC) , discovered in Denmark in 1902,
to be cultivated and domesticated animals which consists of a statue of a horse
were kept. and a bronze disc to represent
The Nordic Bronze Age (c. 1700 BC–500 BC) the sun, both mounted on a
began rather later than the Bronze Age in the wheeled carriage. Examples A helmet with horns dating from
rest of Europe. The raw materials of bronze (tin of the lur, a type of curved c. 1000 BC. It, and another like it,
and copper) were not available in Scandinavia bronze horn, have been found was found at Viksø, Denmark. The
helmets were probably used in rituals
and must have been imported from the south. in Scandinavia and are also
rather than in battle, because they show
The domesticated horse was also introduced to depicted in petroglyphs, rock no battle damage.
Scandinavia at this time, quickly becoming an carvings that show various
important part of daily and religious life, as it aspects of Scandinavian life.
continued to be in the Viking Age. Some of these petroglyphs are
Evidence for trade with distant countries thought to include figures who are
in the Bronze Age is present in the form precursors of the gods depicted in
of swords from Germany, Hungary and Norse mythology.

"Most people know that Vikings did not actually wear horned
helmets, yet for some reason the myth persists"
Chapter I

The body of the Graub

alle man fro m the
thi rd centur y bc, who
was preser ved in a
peat bog nea r Graub
alle, Denmark. Hi s
throat had been cut
and he was buried
nak ed in the bog.

petroglyphs also depict figures with horned

helmets. It is probable that these helmets were
not intended for use in combat but were worn
for ceremonial or ritual occasions, because
their functionality is severely impaired by the farms, and the soil appears to have become show that the result of this contact was an
presence of the horns. exhausted, resulting in the abandonment of increase in the wealth of those at the top of the

20 THE IRON AGE

farms and villages. Roman authors tell of a
southward migration by Germanic peoples,
social tree. They were buried with expensive
Roman artefacts as well as their own local
The Iron Age in Scandinavia (c. 500 BC–AD leading to great battles with the Romans. It goods, while other burials remained as poor
1100) extends from the Bronze Age until the seems likely that this was in part a result of as they had in earlier periods. This suggests
end of the Viking Age. Before the Viking Age, it the poorer growing conditions and greater that kingdoms were more fully emerging now
is generally divided into three periods: the difficulty in feeding people. under the leadership of these most wealthy and
Pre-Roman Iron Age (500 BC–1 BC), the Roman During the Roman Iron Age, Scandinavia powerful people.
Iron Age (1 BC–AD 400) and the Germanic suddenly found itself on the border of the The Germanic Iron Age followed the fall of
Iron Age (AD 400–800). These divisions Roman Empire. The Empire officially ended the Western Roman Empire, which resulted
correspond to the relationship that Scandinavia at the Rhine, but the tribes to the north of from the migrations of Germanic tribes. At the
had with the Roman Empire. The period is it became Romanized and that culture was beginning of this period, the Anglo-Saxons had
characterized by social change from more passed on northwards by them. The just established their kingdoms in England,
egalitarian tribal societies to the chiefdoms and Romans sought alliances with the while the Ostrogoths in Italy, the Visigoths in
petty kingdoms that would become medieval Scandinavians so that they
states as time progressed. could access the resources
The Pre-Roman Iron Age shows great of the north. They also
contrasts in different areas. In the north, in employed Germanic
Finnmark, Norway, hunting and fishing were mercenaries
the primary means of subsistence, as had been to fight other barbarian
the case for thousands of years. In the south – in tribes in Europe. Burials
Jutland, Denmark, for example – villages that
were supported by agriculture and animal
husbandry had grown up. Near these villages, The face of Tollun d Man, a body
found preserved in a peat bog near
field systems that consist of larger fields divided
Tollun d, Denmark. He was killed
into smaller plots for individual farms have in the fourth century BC and still
been found. As the period progressed, large had the noose that killed him
areas of forest were cleared for new villages and aroun d his neck.
 Origins of the scandinavian Nations

Detail of a male face wit

h curly hai r and
a moustache fro m the Ea
rly Iro n Age
Dejbjerg Wagon, whi ch
was sac rifi ced in
a bog in West Jutlan d. Th
e metal fittings
all have male faces lik e
this one.

Spain and southern France, and the Franks

in France and Germany were the strongest
kingdoms in Europe. These kingdoms all
claimed descent from Scandinavian tribes
and their leaders claimed to be descended
from the Germanic gods. Many medieval
legendary Icelandic sagas describe events of
this time, such as Hrólfs saga kraka, which
contains characters that are also described
in the Anglo-Saxon epic Beowulf. It was also
in this period that the characteristic interlace
decoration that is associated with Viking Age
iconography developed.
This was an important time in which the The Hjortspring boat was sacrificed in a bog together
with a collection of weapons, armour and animals. It
conditions for the Viking Age were forged.
probably carried a crew of 22 men and was paddled
The economic and political conflicts that rather than rowed.
developed towards the end of the Germanic
Iron Age may have been the stimulus for the The boat contained many shields, shield Hjortspring Mose. The boat is of unusual
first Viking raids, as the differences between the bosses, iron spearheads, iron swords and the design, with two up-curved spines joined by a
Christian kingdoms to the south and the pagan remains of several coats of mail. It was also stick at both prow and stern. These are purely
Scandinavian kingdoms became greater. found with wooden paddles that would have decorative elements that have no functional
been used to propel the boat, wooden pots use in the design of the boat. Its total length is
HJORTSPRING AND IRON
AGE WARFARE
(pyxides) that may have contained war paint, a
blacksmith’s bellows and other everyday items.
approximately 21 metres (68 feet) from stem to
stern. It is 2 metres (6 feet 6 inches) wide and 21
The discovery at Hjortspring Mose in southern A horse, a dog, a lamb and a calf were included weighs about 500 kilograms (1,100 pounds). It has
Jutland of a wooden plank boat from the Early in the burial. space for 22 men inside, who would have propelled
Iron Age (c. 350 BC–300 BC) demonstrated the This area is now a peat bog, but would have the boat with paddles.
warlike nature of Iron Age Scandinavians. been a small lake at the time of the burial. The design of this boat is similar to petroglyphs
The find has been interpreted as a sacrifice of boats from Scandinavia during the Bronze Age,
involving the weapons and armour of a suggesting that this was a common style of boat
defeated invading warband. Analysis of the throughout that period and into the Iron Age.
finds suggests that the warband would have Like the later Viking ships, it was clinker-built – a
consisted of about ten leaders, with swords, method of boat-building using overlapping planks
and 80–90 men, armed with spears. They – and so may provide a clue to the origin of this
would have been carried in four boats, design feature, which helped make Viking ships
including the one that was sacrificed in so versatile.

The Trundholm Sun

Chariot from Denmark
may have been used as a
calendar but is probably
also of religious
significance. It dates to
c. 1800 BC.
Chapter I
 Origins of the scandinavian Nations

795: 844:
The Vikings 840: The Vikings
begin to attack The Viking attack Spain but
Scotland and 800: city of Dublin are driven away.
Ireland. Vikings settle the is founded in
Scottish islands of Ireland.
Orkney and Shetland, and
discover the Faroe Islands.

865–74: 874: 886:

The Great Army
from Denmark
c. 872: Vikings settle King Alfred agrees a
boundary between his
Iceland.
invades and Harald Finehair kingdom and land in the
conquers much of becomes the north and east of England
England. first king of ruled by the Vikings
Norway. (known as the “Danelaw”). 23

c. 958:
Harald Bluetooth
c. 982–85:
becomes king of Erik the Red
discovers and
Denmark. He converts settles Greenland.
to Christianity, and the
religion begins to spread
across Scandinavia.

1016–30: 1046:
1014: The Danish chieftain Harald Hardrada 1066:
Olaf Haraldsson
Cnut becomes king 1042: becomes king of Harald Hardrada, the “last great Viking”,
invades England but is killed in battle. The
of England, and later Danish rule in Norway.
seizes the
king of Denmark and England ends. Normans conquer England. The Viking age
Norwegian
Norway. draws to a close.
throne.
Chapter I

VIKING HISTORY
A LTHOUGH THE Vikings did
not leave behind any written
documents, letters carved on stone
or wood called “runes” provide clues
about their traditions. More detail can
be found in the writings of people
who came into contact with the
Vikings, but since they were often
the victims of raids, their accounts
can be unreliable. The Vikings told
tales of their adventures that were
passed on and eventually written
down by Christian scholars in
24 books called “sagas”. These
writings tell us much about the
Vikings’ spirit of adventure.

Rui ns of the Brattahlid settl

ement on Greenland. Vikings
lived on this island for ove
r 400 years.
This Swedish rune stone was erected
by a Viking in memo ry of his father.
There are over 6,000 known rune
stones across Scan dina via.

e?
What’s i n at nwhaerme
e ab ou
Exp erts disagre m.
ing” com es fro
the word “Vik
is used for lal
To day the word e Viking p erio
d,
d inav ia ns o f th
Scan gr
ors e word vikin t
but the Old N wen
for those who
was used only i viking.
ndering, or
raiding and plu ”,
vik m eant “bay
In Old Nors e, g cam e
e word Vikin
and p erhaps th lay
ut b ecau se ra iders som etim es
ab o eltered
r victi ms in sh
in wait for thei
.
bays and inlets
Origins of the scandinavian Nations

25
 Chapter II
EXPLORATION
I NCLUDING JOURNEYS that would take them
across the globe, find out how – and why – the
Vikings spread their wings and discovered new lands
far and wide.
Chapter II

S
was drawn by cats. One particularly
OME VIKINGS travelled extensively. well-decorated wagon was buried with
Others remained at home on their farms, the ship found at the Oseberg farm in
growing crops and fishing to survive, but Norway. This is a four-wheeled wagon
they still needed to travel occasionally, perhaps that was not actually fully functional;
to visit a neighbour or to go to the Althing, the the design prevented the wheels from
yearly assembly. turning properly. Therefore it was
Horses were a common means of transport, probably built specifically for the funeral,
particularly in Iceland, where travel was easier but the construction techniques used
by land. Although the horses used were not are still valuable for understanding how
large and were certainly not war horses like wagons were built.
medieval knights used, they were a means of In the winter, the Vikings used skis
travelling relatively quickly. The Vikings made to cross snow, skates made of bone to
good use of this mobility in their forays abroad. cross iced-over lakes or sledges drawn
When they invaded East Anglia in the ninth by horses to carry themselves and their
century, they promptly sought out stocks of goods or families.
horses so that they could more easily travel and Skis were wooden and the skier propelled
raid with less danger of getting caught by the himself along with a single stick, in a process Jamtaland early in the eleventh century. They
Saxon army. that was much like punting nowadays, unlike were being pursued by enemies but were too

28 Archaeological evidence in the form of

fittings and tack for wagons, as well as rutted
modern techniques involving two ski poles.
Sometimes the skier would carry a passenger
slow on their skis, so Arnljótr got both of them
to ride on the back of his skis and outdistanced
roads and tracks, shows that the Vikings used on the back of the skis, too. One episode from their pursuers easily. Although fictionalized,
wagons. They were probably drawn either Snorri Sturluson’s history Heimskringla this idea of carrying passengers may reflect
by horses or oxen, although the Norse god records that the Icelander Þoroddr Snorrason actual practice.
Thor is said to have driven a wagon pulled by and his companion met a Norwegian called Skates were made of bone. They had a broad,
goats, while the goddess Freyja had one that Arnljótr while on a tax-collecting expedition in flat base, rather than the blades that we are
used to now, and were attached to the shoes
using leather thongs. The skater then propelled
himself over the ice with a pole in the same
manner as a skier.
The horses that drew sledges were shod
with special spiked shoes to enable them to get
traction in the poor going. The sledges could be
quite simple in design, with up-curved runners,
and resembling a modern wooden sledge, or
might be highly decorated like the three from
the Oseberg burial. These were intricately
carved and had boxes on the main body that
could have carried goods or a person. Ordinary
sledges might also have been fitted with
undecorated boxes for this purpose.
Boats and ships were a part of daily life in
coastal areas. Some parts of Scandinavia were
most easily accessible by boat, so travel to those
areas was almost exclusively over water. Boats
were used to go fishing, to cross waterways
 Icelandic horses in Iceland.
The breed has
changed little sin ce No rse sett
lers took them to
Iceland, because it was mad
e illegal to import
new stock in AD 982. They
are
only 136 centimetres (54 inch an average of
"The mast could be unshipped when not needed, such as when sho ulder but are ver y stro ng
es) tall at the
and could car ry a
fully armoured Viking.
passing under bridges or when approaching their target stealthily" 29
to visit other farms in the area, or to travel own ship, The Long Serpent, which was said to shallow draught, which permitted them to
great distances for raiding and trading. There be the largest warship ever built. sail right up onto beaches, enabling a form of
were a variety of different types of ship and Cargo ships (knörr in Old Norse) were amphibious landing.
the number of names for “ship” in Old Norse broader than warships and designed to carry Seafaring was also a significant part of the
indicates how important they were. However, larger loads, rather than a cargo of warriors. Vikings’ own popular consciousness. Voyages
it is difficult to determine whether a particular Their greater draught required deeper are integral to many of the Icelandic sagas
word for a ship actually defines the type of ship harbours. Examples of Viking Age cargo ships and their use in the narrative reflects how
it was, because many terms are poetical and were recovered from the fjord at Skuldelev. the Vikings perceived their own world and
others are used synonymously. Reconstructions of these have shown that they their understanding of its geography. The
The dreki (dragon) was the famous longship, could be sailed by small crews of about six men Vikings named the places they came to as they
a sleek warship the sole purpose of which was and that they could carry up to 5,000 pounds explored. As we shall see, this is an important
to carry men into battle. It was also known as of cargo, which indicates that they were trading part of transmitting navigational data.
the skeið or snekkja. This ship could be rowed in everyday goods and not just luxuries. Navigation was not commonly undertaken
at speed as well as being powered by a large away from land, because it was safer to follow a
square sail. The mast could be unshipped when SEA ROUTES AND coastline when sailing, but it was done and had
not needed, such as when passing under low NAVIGATION TECHNIQUES been done for a long time before the Viking Age:
bridges or when the Vikings wished to approach The Vikings are famous for their seafaring the Iron Age Hjortspring boat appears to have
their target stealthily. Examples of these ships abilities. In part this is the result of the had similar sailing capacity to a Viking longship.
are the Oseberg and Gokstad ships, although clinker-built ships they used, which had a Trials have shown that it could have travelled
their design suggests royal ships of state rather flexibility that other nations’ ships did not up to 100 kilometres (60 miles) in one day
than actual warships. Ships 2 and 5 of the five have. This meant that the ships could flex across the Baltic and that its construction would
found at Skuldelev in Denmark are more likely with the waves and could be sailed in seas have enabled it to cope well even in rough seas.
to have been used in battle. One of the most where less well constructed ships could not It might have been used to visit, raid or trade on
famous from literature was Olaf Tryggvason’s venture. Viking warships also had a any of the Baltic shores.
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From thence, we proceeded along a broad aisle, which terminated at
an elevated pavilion, the apartment of the astrologers and
magicians. I met at the door a chiromancer, who desired to inspect
my hand. I extended it without ceremony; but scarcely had I
touched his, before I was glad to withdraw it, it seemed so hot and
fiery.
“I have remarked at a glance,” said he, “that you will be happy if you
are prudent.”
“And you,” said I, “what have you noticed with regard to your own?”
“I knew,” replied he, “by the mount of Saturn, that I was to be
damned.”
“Ah, well! if you had exercised the prudence you recommend to me,
you would not have been here.”
I passed without further speech, and saw a man, who, with
compasses, measured upon a globe, the distances between the
celestial signs: “what are you doing, good man?” said I.
“Ah, God!” replied he, “if I had been born but half an hour sooner,
when Saturn changed his aspect, and Mars lodged in the house of
life, my salvation had been certain.”
The others made similar observations, so that one could hardly
forbear laughing at their complaints. There came up one named
Taisnerius, author of a book upon physiognomy and chiromancy,
who gazed in my face for such a length of time, that he quite
embarrassed me.
“You look like an old burnt shoe,” said I to him; “go your ways; do
not stop so near me.”
“Look at this beggar,” said he; “see how he affects the man of
consequence, because he wears a sword by his side, and hath the
cross of Saint James! What a physiognomy! What an aspect! What
a figure! This man goes straight to the gibbet: besides, there is here
neither wealth nor rank; all are equal.”
“Insolent fellow,” said I; “if I draw my sword, I will teach you how to
speak to a man of honour; have you not had experience enough to
be wise? you ought to bear in mind the correction you received in
Portugal, for treating a gentleman in the same indecorous manner
you have me; but you are incorrigible.”
“Taisnerius,” said my devil, “get into your hole, and draw your own
horoscope.”
After this trifling dispute, we advanced, and encountered many
astrologers, among whom were Hali, Gerard of Cremona, Barthelemi
of Parma, a certain personage by the name of Tondin, and Cornelius
Agrippa. The moment this last perceived me, he cried out that “the
world did him injustice, in calling him Agrippa the black—in accusing
him of magic, and other similar things, for which, he averred, he had
not been damned: that he was born in an age of ignorance, when
good physicians passed for magicians, astrologers for sorcerers, and
all learned men for people who had converse with the devil; that his
book upon the Cabala, was nothing more but a satire upon the
cabalistic art of the Jews, and the little key of Solomon; and finally,
the book itself might be taken as a criterion of his faith, in those
things by which they deceived the simple, and of the vanity of that
science. I am no more a magician,” continued he, “than Cardan,
whom you can see if you wish.”
“Why then have you been damned?”
“Because I abused my knowledge, and amused myself with people’s
credulity; if I had indeed been a magician, I should have become
penitent, and been saved.”
While I was speaking, I heard a tremendous uproar, proceeding from
another apartment, and inquiring the cause, was informed the Turks
were fighting; and as I happened to understand their language,
discovered the quarrel was, in fact, between Mahomet and the two
prophets, who had each established a sect in the Mahometan law.
Mahomet complained very bitterly against Ali, because he had given
to the Persians a false Alcoran, and because Albubekir had so illy
explained his own, in Africa. He, on the contrary, maintained that
the Alcoran could have no other meaning, than what he had
attached to it. Ali asserted, there was no reason in this law; and
furthermore, he contended, that Mahomet himself knew nothing
about the book he had composed. They chafed furiously upon this,
and cried out, as if enraged to madness; I heard their dialogue, but
do not wish to be the herald of their quarrels. This was gentleness
itself, compared with what passed among the heretic and schismatic
Christians; there I saw Luther in the habit of the Augustine order,
with his monks about him, and a pot of wine on the table. “Do the
dead drink,” said I, “to the devil?”
“Not at all; but this wine is set before their eyes, for the purpose of
tormenting them with the sight of what they loved so well; it is for
the same reason, that Luther has his wife with him.”
Melancthon was also there; he wept continually, and was so unquiet,
that he could not remain an instant at rest: he traversed from right
to left upon all sides, and then returned to the place from whence he
set out, only to recommence the same journey. “What is this man
doing?” said I to Curiosity.
“He imitates the conduct he pursued in the world; for there he was
alternately with Luther and the church; sometimes a Zuinglian, and
sometimes a Calvinist; thus are the inconstant tormented. This good
old man whom you see here, is Erasmus; this other is Grotius;
unhappily, they neither of them had any religion. This man, who
appears so sour, and is surrounded with ministers, is Calvin, who
brought about the reformation. These others, are heretics of the
first ages, who are here for being reluctant to submit to legitimate
authority. See the great Photius patriarch of Constantinople, how
the Greeks surround him: he is justly punished for having quitted the
ministry for the patriarchate; if he had remained in a civil station he
would have been saved; but being mixed up in ecclesiastical affairs,
he committed so much wickedness, that he now suffers no more
than he deserves.”
“A man so learned!” said I to the devil.
“Yes, too much so; and too much knowledge is often more injurious
than profitable.”
I began now to tire of hell, and fatigued with my walk, intimated a
desire to my conductor to depart, and to be accompanied by him as
far as the gate. He replied, he wished first to show me the
apartment of the contractors, whom I had not yet seen, and which
was upon a line with that in which we were. I then entered into the
chambers of these farmers of the revenue, and was surprised to see
such a multitude, each habited in the garb of his own country.
“There are here, then,” said I, “people from all quarters of the
globe.”
“Yes,” replied the devil, “since there are every where imposts.”
“But why,” demanded I, “are these people damned, who have levied
the lawful tribute of legitimate princes? I have read in the scripture
that it is lawful to pay tribute unto Cæsar: how shall this tribute be
paid, unless there are people to collect it? must one be damned for
doing a duty?”
“Hold, hold,” cried the demon; “not quite so much philosophy; these
contractors were full as philosophical as you are; but it is
nevertheless true, if they had only levied the tribute due to their
prince, they would not have been damned; but they raised one not
due, either to the prince or to themselves: they would have been
much better off, had they not made so much expense, and the
prince had given them but a shilling for a pound. Calculate, for a
moment, what an enormous sum is requisite, for the compensation
of the host of subalterns attached to an office; consider then, how
much the principal must gain; add to that, what goes into the coffers
of the king, without mentioning what is styled the perquisites, and
you will find that not more than one per cent of the ducats are
realized at the treasury; and that, he who gets the most, is
doubtless the farmer. If the king of Spain would oblige them to send
straight to him the custom on exports and imports, he would profit
by that the contractors get. There needs but one commissary, for all
the revenues of the king, in each office; he should supervise all the
books and accounts, contenting himself with a generous salary for
his care, punishing frauds by pecuniary fines, and by corporeal
inflictions for second offences. If the matter was thus managed, the
king would be richer, and taxes less; the people would be less
burthened, and almost all this great number of contractors, would
remain in commerce, in the army, or country. How much should you
say,” demanded the devil, “the king received, of what is annually
taken from the royal mines?”
“About three quarters,” replied I.
“He would be too well off,” exclaimed he, with a cry of admiration;
“he does not get the thousandth part; all goes in outfits, in
expenses; and I verily believe, that if these things are to continue
thus, the king would gain more by closing them, than in causing
them to be worked.”
“At present,” said I, “there is a necessity of levying imposts, of
having contractors, and paying them well: the neighbouring princes
do the same, to furnish their charges and expenses of war: if this is
an evil, it is one that must be endured, to preserve the whole body
politic from destruction. But how is it possible, you can so
vehemently dislike the gentlemen of the revenue, who form by far
the largest part of your infernal population?”
“It is the force of reason,” answered he, “that compels even demons
to avow the truth, and both to love and detest the wickedness we
are desirous of detecting in others, to make them companions of our
misery.”
“I admire,” said I, “the force of truth; and I admire not less to see
injustice hated, even among the unjust; but I cannot comprehend,
why you should say, that however legitimate the tribute due to the
prince, the contractors cannot conscientiously take the public
money.”
“You misapprehend me; that they can do; but the farmers collect
more money than is consistent with equity, or the orders of the
prince; they extort that which should be useful for the maintenance
of the public weal: it is of this charge, of this waste, the contractors
are guilty.”
“I understand you,” said I to the demon; “but conduct me from
hence, for I am weary.”
He continued:—“Do you comprehend what I say, that it is the
contractors who are most happy and rich? and from whence come
those superb mansions, as magnificently furnished as the Escurial
palace? how can they support such enormous expenses? entertain
so many gentlemen? give their daughters such ample dowries?
contract advantageous alliances with the noblest families of Castile
and Arragon? Such an one shall command to-day, and be covered in
the king’s presence, who a year since drove a chariot, or stood
behind a carriage. Another, who hired his land, shall presently
purchase the farm he formerly cultivated. Appointed a subaltern in
one of the offices, he soon becomes its head, and is elevated by
degrees to the nobility.”
The demon having finished, I thanked him, and wishing to impress
the lesson on my memory, engaged him to repeat it. He summed
up the whole in the following manner:—“Observe neither what
reason or the law prescribes to thee, respect neither God nor the
king, lay the peasantry under contribution, succumb to the great,
become a great proprietary farmer, cause the purchaser to pay you
twice for what you sell: to put out of sight the baseness of your
origin, obtain an appointment in one of the bureaux, and accustom
yourself to command; for by these gradations one may arrive at the
highest dignities.”
“What signifies all that,” said one of the contractors, who listened to
our discourse; “is it not natural for a person to elevate himself if he
can? Is it not the order of Providence, that the lofty should be
abased, and the humble exalted? Fortune is but a wheel, which in
its revolutions puts underneath what but now was on top. If the
subjects were more attached to the government, the sovereign
would have less need of imposts, and consequently of collectors. If
they were perfectly just, they would not need a king. To complain of
our avarice is to accuse heaven; instead of which only the
impenetrability of individuals should be reproached, who would
rather see a great kingdom like Spain entirely overthrown, than
advance a single real to repair the slightest breach. Know, Signor
Devil, who has delivered such a philippic against the contractors,
that we have been to our country, what the bones and muscles are
to the human body, or numerous armies to a province threatened
with an invasion: if the king of hell would but consult with us, we
should teach him to fortify his dominions in such a manner, that they
would be impregnable to both saints and angels. In the first place, I
would lay a tax upon every demon who plies his occupation in the
world: secondly, I would establish a daily employment for each soul
in the infernal world: thirdly, I would make the magicians and
sorcerers pay an annual tribute: this will be done, for I have heard
the king of the demons was about to organise a council of
financiers; and this is a subject that might well engage even the
attention of that celebrated Englishman, who invented the first paper
currency of England.”
“And wherefore,” said the demon, “impose a tax on us? What will
you do when we refuse to pay? Can you confiscate our estates? In
what prisons will you confine us when you have decreed our arrest?
We should mock at all your projects: ah, little man! you grow
licentious! you must be chained up; come, obey; extend your hands
and legs.”
“I shall do neither the one nor the other,” said the contractor; “you
are not here our master; I will call the financial council together; and
I am going this instant to denounce you to the grand inquisition,
because you resist paying tribute to the king of Spain.”
“I laugh at your inquisition,” said the demon, “and to be beforehand
with you, I will denounce you to the prince of devils himself: come,
quick, obey; extend your hands and legs.”
The contractor found himself loaded with irons, in spite of his
remonstrances: the devil then went into the apartment of the
inquisitors to subject them to the same treatment, and afterwards
returned to accompany me to the gate, as I had requested.
“These insolents,” muttered he, “these insects! what pride! what
rodomontades! was there ever seen such supercilious knaves? But I
will humble them in such a manner, and make them suffer so much,
that they will have no stomach to talk of imposts and taxes.”
When we had left these contractors, (whom I regard as the most
unhappy class in hell, because, let them do ever so much good to
the prince or to the state, let them be ever so upright in their
administration, nay, even if they were angels, they could not escape
accusation and hatred) our attention was attracted by an immense
crowd, which had arrived and filled up the avenue in such a manner,
that we could not pass, and so were obliged to fall back to the
opposite gate. “Who are these people?” inquired I of the demon.
“They are,” replied he, “a corps of tailors; they arrive here in crowds,
like great armies, and when they come, all the demons are put in
requisition to confine them; my duty compels me to assist; go with
me, and amuse yourself with our proceedings.”
We made our way through this crowd of tailors, and arrived at
length, before a great furnace, the mouth of which was more than
ten fathoms in diameter. There they bound these tailors in faggots,
putting from ten to a dozen in each bundle: they fastened each one
by the feet, and then brought a rope about the whole package, and
afterwards suspending the faggot to a hook, which was elevated by
means of a pulley, over the centre of the furnace, a devil detached
it, and let it fall into the fire. Sometimes the tailors who had their
arms free, grasped so firmly the pulley, that the devil had an infinite
deal of trouble to loose their hold: when that took place, he caused
the whole mass to make a pirouette in the air, and as the motion
was violent, the tailors were always forced to let go, and drop into
the fire. It happened that one of these faggots fell outside the
aperture, upon a quantity of others, which were ranged like a pile of
wood, and which the devil measured. The individuals of this faggot,
seized hold of the others in such a manner, that they could not
separate them; so that the devils who united their strength for that
purpose, were obliged to take the whole pile, attach it to the hook,
and let it all go together. The mass was so great, that it seemed as
if it would choke the fire of hell. The devils bestirred themselves,
and finally made an end of the tailors; they then cast in a great
quantity of oil, tallow, and sulphur, and stirring them up with long
iron tormentors, and employing large bellows, the fire caught all at
once, and raised a flame, that rose above the mouth of the furnace
more than three hundred feet. All the tailors having been cast into
the fire, their demon general, with a haughty and severe air, came to
demand of me, why I had not been bound with the others.
“Because,” said I to him, “I am not a tailor, a rogue, a thief, neither a
cabbager of stuff nor money; I am here with my companion,
Curiosity, to inspect the beauties and antiquities of this country.”
“You are a liar,” replied the general; “you are one of my subjects; I
know you by your strait-cut dress, which, without doubt, you have
made out of the clippings of some other; come, obey; cast yourself
into the fire, or I will throw you in.”
As he was about to bind me, my demon informed the general that I
was not yet dead; that I had never been of any trade, and that he
believed I should not be one of their subjects, because those who
descended quick into hell, conducted themselves afterwards in such
a manner, as not to revisit it after death; furthermore, the cross of
Saint James, (which I carried,) would inspire fear, and cause false
alarms in the bosoms of the damned.
“Come hither, then,” said the general, “and profit by what you see;
you know, at least, that tailors are the fuel of hell, and serve to burn
those that come hither.”
My demon advised me to go promptly, because if the general should
get angry, he might do me a mischief. In walking along, he
informed me the unhappy tailors were so numerous, that they not
only fed the great furnace of hell, which warmed all the apartments,
but also furnished the table of Lucifer, when he had a mind to feast.
“How!” exclaimed I, “Lucifer eat? Can spirits eat?”
“Do you not know,” replied he, “that the damned are as the herb the
sheep eateth, and that death is this sheep? Have you not read in
your sacred books, that death devoureth the damned? Mors
depascet eos.”
While he was speaking, we met a troop of booksellers, at whose
head was one Peter Marteau, a publisher, of Cologne; he was loaded
with a burden so unwieldy, that it was impossible to comprehend
how any one man could bear it. They informed me, these were the
books printed under his name, after his death. The booksellers of
Holland were also very heavily laden; and those of France bore also
the books struck off at their houses, with the title of a Dutch
bookseller. These people were carrying their books to the furnace,
but were prevented by a singular accident: a demon, who passed by
with a flambeau, approaching to look at them, their papers caught
fire, and instantly spread from one to another through the whole
body: when they perceived the flame, they threw down their loads,
and fled with all convenient speed. I asked them why they were
damned: they answered, for the faults of others.
“An author,” observed they, “often carries a work to the printer,
which has no merit, and besides, as unsaleable as a girl, ugly and
poor: by this means the printer is ruined; in vain he curses the
author, and seeks to reimburse himself by the sale of an unpopular
book; this book is the cause of his failure; his creditors seize his
goods and shop; he maddens, and resigns himself to despair. A
translator, who understands Greek, undertakes a dull work;
sometimes he supposes he has discovered a manuscript; he carries
his translation to the printer, who, not being able to get rid of it, sells
the leaves to the grocer or butter woman. Another cause of our
damnation; a bookseller sells at a handsome profit, the satires of
Juvenal, the comedies of Terence, and of other poets, as those of
Virgil and Ovid; a lackey, a shop-boy, a soldier, a clerk, purchase
these works, and amuse themselves among serving girls, with what
cost long study to these men of genius. Without mentioning other
books we vend, and which obtain circulation, only because they
flatter the taste or passions of the buyer, is it not true, that a pretty
story of gallantry, secret memoirs, cabinet intrigues, which profess to
expose the designs of the government, or the end of some great
affair, are the most dangerous books? and these are the kind we sell
best. Is it us, then, upon whom reproach ought to fall, or on the
readers?”
“He speaks advisedly,” said a Holland publisher; “we have put to
press all the follies of certain authors, who wished to revenge
themselves, either upon a mistress, judge, minister of state, or
prince; and for this we must needs be adjudged guilty of other’s
faults, and share their punishment! but that would have been slight,
if we had not meddled with books of religion. We have published in
Holland the works of all parties; Christians, Jews, Catholics,
Protestants, Socinians, Quakers, and every other sect; and often in
the same book, sold both sides of the controversy.”
“You have then,” said I, “no religion!”
“We are,” replied the Dutchman, “the historians of authors; and as a
historian must have neither relations, country, friends, nor religion,
even so we have none of these; but under the name of citizens of
the world, have but one object, and that, the advancement of our
own interests.”
Immediately upon these words, he hastily fled with the others, to re-
assemble themselves near the demon of the book merchants, who
called for his whole crew. I felt great compassion at the fate of
these unhappy wretches, condemned to hell, because they were
brought up to the profession of publishing the dreams and
extravagances of authors: it is worthy also of reflection, that they
are compelled to consult the taste of the age, and of the multitude.
Now the taste of the age is exceedingly fickle: it is not that of
learned men and wits; books of morality and criticism are purchased
much less readily than novels and profane histories; so that book
merchants, in their condition, have an unhappiness that attaches
itself to no other trade, independently of the fact, that this business
is not held in the same estimation at the present day, that it formerly
was. They were then ranked with men of letters; they were
admitted to the bar and church; the cardinal Ximenes bestowed on
them great preferments; he ennobled him who published the famous
Bible d’arrias montars. We see, in his time, publishers who
possessed rich abbeys and seats in the council. And what was not
done for them by the fifth Sixtus, that incomparable genius? In
France, they arrived at great distinction, and have been seen in the
first posts of the principal cities of the kingdom; and we know that a
celebrated emperor of Germany, was one of the first publishers, if
not himself the inventor of printing. But to return from this
digression: when the book merchants were re-assembled, the
notaries, who had just arrived, wished to place themselves in their
ranks; but the devil used his authority to separate them, averring
that there was, in fact, a vast difference.
“Without doubt,” said the notaries, “we are the book merchants of
manuscripts; we compose and publish our works, to which the public
accord the same faith, as to things they have themselves seen; we
are faithful public witnesses, the guarantees of contracts, promises,
and obligations; the guardians of titles, rights, and privileges; our
testimony is true, infallible; above suspicion, deceit, and fraud.”
“Why,” said the devil, “are you come to hell? for if you fulfilled those
duties, you are honest people, and I declare, not only useful, but
necessary to the public; for, between ourselves, there is so little
public sincerity, that if one could not prove, by writings and
witnesses, the price at which he bought or sold, he would often find
himself cheated of his money.”
“It is,” said one of the notaries, “for some antedates or superfluous
ciphers, that we are damned; judge you, if the matter is of such vital
consequence; one is so often deceived by writings, and one figure is
so easily substituted for another;—the pen too, slips sometimes, and
a nought is so easily made!”
“You are right, in truth,” said the devil, addressing himself to me;
“they wrong these poor people, in sending them to us; they have
committed trifling faults, while they do not punish the apothecaries,
even, for putting up the recipes sent them. I have a great mind to
send these unfortunate persons home again.—Go; return, my
friends; you have suffered great injustice.”
“And we also,” said the corps of bankrupts; for they had done them
the honour to separate them from the merchants, who had dealt
honestly.
“As to you, Signors,” said the devil, “enter into the furnace, without
further examination: we leave it to the notaries to enter at pleasure;
they have within them a torment as cruel as fire; it is conscience,
that never yet respected any person.”
“Oh, oh! ah, ah!” cried the bankrupts, “if they had not wronged us,
we should have kept our faith with every one: would you, because
we were cheated, that we should send our families to the
almshouse?”
“I did not go to Holland, or to the islands, when I failed,” said one;
“I shut myself up in a private room in my house, and there
negotiated, through my wife, with my creditors, making each one to
remit a part of his just claims: you know what would have
happened, had I appeared; there is seldom much charity among
creditors.”
“I,” said another, “did much better; for I transported from Madrid to
Venice all the merchandises I had collected, changed my name, and
after having made a fortune upon these goods, paid the principal, on
condition they would remit the interest: was there not in this
bankruptcy, good faith, justice, and prudence?”
“Yes,” replied the devil, “and I cannot conceive on what grounds you
were condemned; it is very evident it must have been for something
else.”
“No,” continued the man, “it was for this very thing; because they
pretend that for these twenty years, I have injured my creditors, in
depriving them of the enjoyment and possession of their property;
consider, Signor devil, if I am under an obligation to repair this
damage? would it not only be ridiculous, but render them guilty of
usury towards me.”
“Ah! the honest man,” said the devil; “why do they send to us folks
so upright and sincere? but my friend,” continued he, “you have the
ill luck to be found in bad company; we cannot help you; arm
yourself, therefore, with courage, and prepare to support the
sufferings to which the bankrupts are destined; you will be forced to
accustom yourself to much pain; but console yourself, by uniting
your complaints with those of your comrades.”
Directly the devil stamped upon the pavement, where the publishers,
notaries, and bankrupts stood, when a trap door, springing open,
engulphed them all, and closed itself as before.
At this stage of my dream, I was awakened by a serenade of violins
and hautboys, that some one gave to a young lady of the house. I
immediately arose, and looking from the window, saw a number of
young men, who, after a prelude upon their instruments, began to
sing. As there was no window but mine open, they imagined they
beheld the beauty to whom their homage was addressed; and to
amuse myself at their expense, I threw out a splendid handkerchief,
which one of them eagerly caught; he kissed it more than an
hundred times; then putting a diamond, worth thirty pistoles, into a
purse, threw it into my chamber, with a billet couched in these
terms:—
“My charming princess, at night my heart awakes for thee; by day, I
am only occupied with your charms. I burn, without cessation, with
the love you have inspired; when shall I have the happiness to
express to you in private, what I feel, and what your silence causes
me to suffer? one sweet line from your hand, shall re-assure and
console me. Speak, and nothing can equal my happiness; continue
silent, my misery is at its height, and I have no relief, but in death.”
After perusing this billet, I answered it in the following manner, the
substance of which was furnished by a song I happened to
remember.
“When one reigns, or when one loves, the pain is not without its
pleasures; solicitude renders them more vivid. Happy prince! Happy
lover! it is not in vain you suffer; they will resist you but slightly,
when they themselves suffer from protracted resistance; yes, when
one reigns, or when one loves, the pain is not without its pleasures.”
I cast my billet from the window, and it was soon taken up. The
adventure seemed to me very pleasant: behold what followed; I
deposited in the bed of the fair, the diamond that was designed for
her, not being able to keep it longer with honour, and without
exposing myself to the anger of the young lady, who would soon
know by what window it entered. Upon retiring the next night, she
found it; she informed her lover of the discovery, and he explained
the whole affair. She thanked me graciously for my gallantry; I gave
her the billet I had received, and she returned my handkerchief. The
mistake arose from my having lain, that night, in the chamber
ordinarily occupied by this young lady, her bed having been removed
to that of her father, and on that account was unable, as usual, to
answer her gallant. She made me the confidant of her attachment,
and besought my good offices with her father, which I so zealously
used, that in less than a month, I assisted at the marriage of these
lovers.
Those who interpret dreams, say, that the one I had concerning hell,
hardly presaged this adventure. I pray those who read my reveries,
or nocturnal visions, to consider that they contain more truth, than
one would be apt, at first, to imagine: by day they ought to occupy
themselves with thoughts upon hell, as intently as they would in the
most important affair; or as they would seek the means of
deliverance, if shut up in prison, for a crime against the state. One
is damned for a less offence than the robbery of the treasury, revolt,
or parricide. Yes, for a much slighter fault, one shall be eternally
tormented in hell.—Reflect often upon this, dear readers, lest you
have it to say, through the interminable ages of futurity, “I could not
have thought it.”
 SEVENTH NIGHT.
THE REFORMATION OF HELL.

As I promenaded one day in my garden, thinking of demons, which

are always at the back of every one, the foolish idea struck me, that
it would not be wholly useless to reform my life. I felt a curiosity to
see my evil demon; but, thought I to myself, if I should see him I
believe I should die with fear. No, said I again, I should not be
terrified, if he would but show himself in a human shape. After
having repressed this improper curiosity, and resumed my
composure, I heard a man speaking to me; and turning my eyes to
that side from whence the voice proceeded, I perceived, through a
grated door, which separated the garden from the park, on the other
side, a gentleman of a good mien, who requested me to open the
gate, as he wished to have some conversation with me. As he
resembled a man with whom I had formerly some misunderstanding,
I refused; but he passed over it before I had the power to prevent
him. Immediately drawing my sword, I set upon him; and he doing
the same, parried my thrusts and stood upon the defensive only. As
I perceived that his figure at one moment contracted, and anon
dilated to a huge magnitude, I began to suspect that he was either a
magician or a demon; and stepping rearward some paces,
demanded who he was. He answered that he was my demon, and
wished to render me a service.
“I have no need of such service,” said I to him; “for demons are both
deceptive and malicious.”
“No, no,” replied he; “fear nothing; only come with me.”
Forthwith he transported me into the air, and I soon lost sight of my
house and garden. In a short time we drew near the moon; and
while passing, I gazed attentively upon those valleys, mountains,
and lakes, which are but imperfectly perceived from the earth by the
aid of telescopes. The demon transported me to Sicily and set me
down upon the summit of a mountain covered with cinders yet hot,
which he told me was Etna. There was, from this place, a very fine
prospect; one sees all the beauties of the isle, and of the
surrounding seas: in the distance, the highlands of Africa are
distinguished, like fleecy clouds, upon the verge of the horizon; a
multitude of vessels were sailing in view, which seemed like white
ants, or flies, sporting upon the surface of the ocean. After we had
rested there about one hour, the demon told me to follow him. We
descended into an aperture from whence belched forth smoke and
flame that illumined the whole mountain.
“It is here,” said the demon, “that Pliny fell, when he had the
temerity to approach too near.”
The whole way, as we proceeded, was composed of rocks and fat
earth, like bitumen, and from time to time, might be seen veins of
sulphur. The rocks were full of little crevices, from whence issued
vapours and sulphurous exhalations, and sometimes slight gusts of
wind. When we had travelled downwards about the space of an
hour, we came to a vast cavern, into which we entered; at its
extremity was an immense palace, hewn in the rock, and elevated
upon massive pillars.
“This,” said the demon, “is the palace of Lucifer. Let us enter into
the great hall, where we shall see him give a general audience to the
damned: listen attentively to what shall be said; examine the events
that take place, and let what you shall see serve for your
instruction.”
The following is a correct account of what I saw in these
subterraneous abodes.—For a long time, Lucifer, the ruler of hell had
not given audience to his subjects: the disorder that ordinarily obtain
in states from the negligence of princes, are incidental as well
among demons as men. The evil spirits remained sometimes for
ages in the world, without rendering any account of the souls they
had gained, and often suffered themselves to be driven from the
tenements of which they were masters; the address of some monk
or priest snatching from them their conquest. Men performed in hell
the office of demons; and as they frequently left their chains to seek
their enemies, battles were as common, as formerly between the
Romans and Gauls. Lucifer, either from a fear for his crown, or
weariness at seeing so many combats, resolved one day to hear, in
general convention, the complaints of the damned; to introduce a
reform among the demons; to re-establish the submission and
obedience due to his sceptre, and to extend the boundaries of his
empire by new conquests: this was very easy of execution, provided
he would give access and free parlance to his subjects, and compel
his demons to render an exact account of their administrations.
With this design he secretly consulted with Belzebub, the prince of
devils, Belial, the governor-general of Pagan nations, and Ashtaroth,
the princess who commands all women. At the termination of this
council, circular letters were published, which ordained that all those
who had complaints to prefer, and all the demons scattered over the
world, should assemble upon an appointed day in the great hall of
the palace, when and where they should be heard.
The day fixed being arrived, the hall was presently filled, and
measures taken, that as soon as one party was heard, another
should enter. Lucifer was seated upon his golden throne, having
upon each side those princes I have before mentioned. After having
inveighed against the disorders prevalent in hell, and stated his
determination to rectify them, he signified his permission to the
standers by to speak. At this intimation there arose an old man of a
haughty appearance, and having a crown of laurel upon his head; he
read the Roman laws touching parricides, and amplified upon the
ingratitude of natural and adopted children towards their parents.
“The parties,” said Belzebub to Lucifer, “must be ordered, before
commencing their speeches, to announce their names, because
many of them have been dead a great length of time.”
Such a decree was accordingly made; and he who had now spoken
about half an hour, said that he was Julius Cæsar, the first emperor
of the Romans. “Under the pretext of the liberty of our common
country,” continued he, “Brutus and Cassius, to gratify their
ambition, assassinated me in the midst of the senate, their enmity
was not directed against the empire and monarchy, which were, on
the contrary, the object of their desires; but they hated the emperor,
who had magnified the Roman power, and extended its dominion
both north and east. Was the government better administered in
the hands of those senators, who, by their feuds and personal
dislikes, perilled the salvation of the republic, by resigning it into the
hands of a perpetual dictation, whom they were obliged shortly
afterwards to elect? Rome having once tasted the benefits of
monarchy, preferred rather to obey a Nero, a Tiberius, a Caligula, or
a Heliogabulus, than to re-establish this pretended public liberty, for
which Brutus and Cassius, those two traitors, took up arms against
the father of their country.”
He continued his discourse in this strain, and concluded by moving,
that they should be treated in hell as assassins, public disturbers,
and traitors.
Brutus then arose, and with a trembling voice, said: “Senators, you
have heard Cæsar; have you not been biassed by his eloquence?
But will you forget the services I have rendered? Remember the
advice you privately gave me, to encourage the glorious design I had
conceived in favour of your liberty? Answer then to Cæsar, that it
was by your advice I gave the fatal stab; that if the laws had not
been abrogated and violated by the formidable power of tyranny,
you would, yourselves, have put him to death under the forms of
justice; and that your silence, after the execution of my project, was
an evidence of your approbation.”
Cassius, assuming the discourse, said he would not undertake to
plead his own cause if Cicero was present.
“I will not,” said Cæsar, “listen to this timid sycophant; this cowardly
soul; this selfish orator: when he feared my power, he said, in full
senate, that he would be my buckler against enemies, and, at the
same time, conspired against my life, and defends the act of Brutus
and Cassius. His cupidity was so eager, that for money, he might be
bought on the same day to speak upon both sides of a case; and so
sober-tongued, that there was not a soldier in the army, who would
have bestowed upon his greatest foe one tittle of the scurrility he
heaped upon Anthony. You recollect, Signors, his phillipics: he had
not the courage to support a change of fortune; and the common
cause was abandoned by this patriotic man before he was slain by
Anthony.”
“May all such wretches be ever punished in the same manner! and
with what can they reproach me? Did I put any senator to death?
Did I pillage the commonwealth? Did I not return, by my will, what
I had amassed and conserved for her defence? Will they accuse me
of tyranny and usurpation? I, who delivered the Romans from the
ambition of a Pompey? Will they charge me with cruelty? I, who
could not behold without weeping the head of my most inveterate
enemy? Yes, I can truly say, that it was grief at the sad fate of
Pompey, that invited me to declare war against Egypt. I was
desirous of avenging the death of this great man. He would have
made himself master of Rome if I had not prevented him; and
because I stood forth as the defender of the public liberty, was
assassinated as a usurper. What wickedness! What perfidy! What
cruelty! The senate recognized every thing I had done, when, after
my death, they erected statues, and built me temples. Infernal
judge, will you bear with these impious men, who killed him whom
the empire delighted to honour?”
Cicero would have spoken, fearing the eloquence of Cæsar, or his
vehemency, would impose upon the judges; but Cæsar constantly
interrupting him, Lucifer, tired with their clamours and the length of
the cause, ordered that the emperor, as a punishment for not having
profited by the advice he received on his way to the senate, upon
the day of his death, should remain in his present place.
“It was I,” said Cicero, “who caused this information to be sent him.”
“Base liar! perfidious man!” cried Cæsar, “it was you who gave me
this information! why did you not bring it yourself?”
“It was the will of Fate, that Brutus, Cassius, and other senators,
involved in this conspiracy, should be marks for infamy, as traitors to
their country, and as having afforded a direful example of politicians
without courage.”
After him arose Alexander the Great, very much vexed that Cæsar
had spoken before him, and pretending that the cause of this Roman
emperor should not be considered before that of the emperor of the
world; but he abandoned his pretensions, when a crier had made
proclamation, that in hell, all conditions were equal, and that the
damned had among them, no other distinctions than those of crime.
“Infamous prince,” said Clytus, who stood behind Alexander, “dare
you speak, after having murdered the best of your friends? Is not
the brightness of thy conquests tarnished by the shame of thy
cruelty? What punishment dost thou merit, for having despoiled
princes so distant from Macedon, who, so far from having wronged
or injured you, did not even know you?”
“Silence,” said Alexander.
“What! I be silent! if Lucifer, the chief of this empire, imposes silence
upon me, I will obey: but shall I yet receive orders from you, cruel
brigand, notorious robber, sacrilegious rascal, debauchee, fool,
drunkard, incendiary?”
“No, no: speak, son of Olympias,” said Lucifer to Alexander.
He began thus: “Alexander, son of Jupiter Amnion, lord of the world,
most high and mighty emperor, conqueror of the habitable globe—”
Clytus laughed at the boasts: “what a lord! what an emperor! what a
god! Behold the titles which I dispute. In the first place, his mother
was a virtuous woman. She but mocked her son, who, through
pride, accused her with having committed adultery with Jupiter
Amnion. Secondly, he was not lord of the world; since he did not
conquer the tenth part of it: and thirdly, it is false that he is a great
emperor; for an emperor is only ennobled by heroic virtues and
qualities, which he did not possess. And how is it possible that he
should be the conqueror of the habitable globe, having never been
neither to Africa, nor very far in Europe, nor to China? Thus he is
only Alexander, as I am Clytus.”
Here Lucifer passed an order that this prince should only assume the
titles that veritably pertained to him, and permitted Clytus to
continue.
“I was,” said Clytus, “the prime favourite of this Alexander, who,
wishing to conquer every body, had no enemy nearer and more
powerful than himself. Contemplate our portraits: I was his
favourite, and I have always seen him as ambitious of distinction in
wickedness as he was for honourable action: but as a foundation to
my complaints against him, I ought to state, that this prince,
elevated by his flatterers to a place among the gods, was
accustomed to speak without respect of Philip his father. He showed
himself more munificent towards gladiators, musicians, and
drunkards, than towards his bravest captains. In conformity to this
disposition, he gave the kingdom of Sidon to Abdolonymus, a well-
digger; he committed numberless extravagances at the instigation of
his mistresses; to please a courtesan named Roxana, he burnt the
palace of the Persian kings; his conduct towards Parmenio, Philotas,
and Calisthenes, as well as Aminthus, his relation, is sufficient proof
of his barbarity. And did he not exhibit more than cruelty towards
me? I was the most faithful of his confidants; he who flattered him
the least; who gave him the best of counsel; to whom he owed his
reputation and honour. Alas! because I had the presumption to
speak my true sentiments at a feast, he arose from the table and
inflicted upon me a mortal wound. I now demand expiation. King
of hell, revenge Clytus, punish Alexander.”
This prince then replied as follows:—“Favourites bear the same
relation to sovereigns as mice to cats.”
At this exordium Clytus began to laugh, and said: “Listen to a
comparison worthy of the disciple of Aristotle.”
“The mouse,” continued Alexander, “seems at first to divert itself
with the cat; but finally this animal, being more powerful, devours
the mouse, who cannot accuse her with cruelty for wishing to take
her turn in the sport. Such, about me, was the condition of Clytus:
but to demonstrate the mistake of this ungrateful favourite, I aver,
that it is the policy of princes to keep favourites, who are towards
them neither forward nor haughty; and not to accord them too much
power. The liberties they take with us cause us to fall into
contempt; their hauteur makes us appear timid, and their power fills
us with just suspicions. Clytus having thus taken advantage of me, I
was frequently ashamed of his familiarities. Such was his pride, that
if I dared to contradict him in the least thing, he reared up like an
unruly horse: my bounty had rendered him so powerful, that he was
in fact Alexander, and I was but Clytus. In particular, he abused my
mistresses, and the officers of my house; in counsel he was always
right and I wrong; in every battle, it was he that was victorious, and
I who had been slack and timid. If I put some to death, it was but
consonant with justice, to punish the seditious or conspiring; if I
burnt the palace of the kings of Persia, it was for the purpose of
destroying a fortress that had been used against me; if the pleasures
that were indulged in after my conquests were sometimes too free,
it arose from a desire to gratify my generals; in fine, the death of
Clytus crushed those treasonous designs of which I had notice. He
only waited for an opportunity to set one part of my army against
the other, and to despatch me. I sang at a feast the songs my
soldiers had composed upon their officers and myself; I rallied Clytus
for having, in a certain action, taken to flight: this madman let loose
his rage upon me; he loaded me with contumely; the wine he had
drank deprived him of reason: I thought it was time to punish his
audacity, and to prevent the excesses to which it might carry him.
Thus perished an usurping, traitorous, insolent and unworthy
favourite. Lucifer, I have spoken the truth.”
After having heard the parties, the king said to his demons, “Take
notice how proper it is that a subject should be faithful and
submissive to his prince; and that a favourite should not go beyond
the respect he owes to his sovereign. We do order that as long as
Alexander shall be tormented by his ambition, Clytus shall
experience all the remorse that springs from rashness and
ingratitude.”
At the same moment was heard the voice of Seneca, speaking to
Nero: “Cruel prince, how have you profited by the lessons of
clemency, goodness, and humanity I have given you? Did you not
murder me to repossess yourself of the wealth I had received from
you? Such was my recompense for having raised you to empire.
Was it not I who saved you from the conspiracy formed by Piso,
after you had set fire to all quarters of Rome? Was it not I who
delivered you from the snares which had been spread for you by the
friends of your mother Agrippina, whom you afterwards put to
death? I was more careful of your reputation than yourself, when I
advised you not to exhibit yourself as a comedian upon the theatre;
when you entered the lists to dispute the prize of poetry with Lucan,
whom you afterwards assassinated.”
“Old fool,” said Nero, in a slender voice, “thou wert become
unworthy of my favours by thy excessive ambition, and by the
dishonour you brought upon my palace. Great Lucifer, you see a
man who, being my preceptor, did not profit by his own theory. He
maintained a shameful commerce with my mother; and with a view
to favour it, poisoned the Emperor Claudius, my father, who did not
commit suicide, as was the prevalent opinion at Rome. The partiality
of my mother filled him with such audacity, that he projected
mounting the throne, and having me poisoned. I was informed of
the intrigue, which I suspected before having received positive
advice. I observed that his immense wealth had obtained him very
many friends among the senators, gentlemen, and officers of the
army; and it is worth while, also, to know, that this man who
preached so much about frugality, and the love of mediocrity, was
far from practising these virtues, which are easily reported of a man
possessing twelve millions of revenue. After having punished the
tyranny and usurpation of my mother, I was bound to punish the
crimes of Seneca; but I was yet lenient enough to leave the manner
of his death to his own choice.”
“The subjects and favourites of princes,” said Lucifer, “are always
culpable, when they are ungrateful, or entertain any other desire
than the prosperity of their masters: they ought to leave to them the
recompense of their services, without attempting to reward
themselves. We will, then, that the philosopher, Seneca, born in
Spain, should be punished as if he had compassed his designs upon
Nero: and that Nero be treated as an unjust and barbarous prince.”
“This ordinance,” said Sejanus, “does not concern me: Tiberius
caused me to be assassinated without reason, actuated by one of
those suspicions to which he was usually addicted. He was troubled
more by a fear of losing his life, than the empire. His courtezans
had too much influence over him. As to myself, I have never
punished any but the enemies of Tiberius: to be sure, they were also
mine. But were not, in truth, the opposers of a minister who
governed as well as I did, foes to their prince and country?”
Tiberius would have answered; but Lucifer, interrupting him, ordered
that all the favourites of princes should come in. There appeared a
vast number, among them Plautius, the favourite of Severus, was
particularly remarkable: also Faustus, the favourite of Phyrrhus, king
of Epirus; Pyreneus and Cleandrus, favourites of the emperor
Commodus; Cincinnatus, favourite of Britulus; Rufus, favourite of
Domitian; Ampronisius, favourite of Adrian; Belisarius, favourite of
Justinian.
“Listen,” said Lucifer; “the favour of princes is like quick-silver, the
motion of which cannot be arrested, and which flies the endeavour
to restrain it. If one would sublimate it, it is a vapour that exhales
itself; and often, if too much is used, it becomes dangerous. If one
anoints with it, it penetrates to the very bones: those who are
accustomed to draw it from the mine, and purify it, contract a
malady which makes them tremble all their lives. This is the
character of princes’ favour: it is inconstant, because it depends
upon the humour and passion of one who seeks only novelty and
the pleasure of the moment. If you are importunate, if you exhibit
the least sign of impatience, if you are even suspected of prudence
in the management of your credit or fortune, the attachment of the
prince will cool. If you show any marks of envy against another, of
discontent in yourself, or indifference in the presence of your
protector, he suspects you, and passes straightway from suspicion to
enmity and hatred. Bear then with resignation your bad fortune and
the humour of your master: your pains, attentions, time, health,
wealth all lost, you are at length obliged to return into your humble
retreat, there to expect death; which, to your grief, comes not soon
enough to free you from regret and the remembrance of your
follies. A casual sally, an instant of good humor, a lucky word, a
sudden caprice, a nothing, makes a favourite. Five or six years
suffice for his fortune; if delayed, it escapes him. The same causes
can bestow or withdraw favour. A favourite ought to make these
reflections in his prosperity,—that he must abstain from those
liberties that are common among equals, and that freedom which
friends indulge in; that he must be constantly submissive, and know
how to accompany respect with complaisance; that the prince ought
always to speak the first word in a confidential affair; and to
preserve his secrets, he must dispose himself to every kind of
privation. He who hath not regulated his conduct by these precepts
must bear the burden of his own imprudence; and for this reason we
order that those favourites who have incurred the displeasure of
their sovereigns shall be punished as unfaithful subjects.”
Lucifer then commanded an old man to advance, whom he
perceived in the hall behind the others. There advanced then a man
of a pleasant countenance, in a Greek habit, and followed by other
persons clothed in the same manner.
“I am Solon,” said this old man: “I gave to the Athenians laws which
they did not exactly follow; this person contiguous to me is the
philosopher Anaxarchus, whom the tyrant Nicocreon caused to be
brayed in a mortar: in this little hump-back, behold the famous
Aristotle, preceptor to the great Alexander: his philosophy excused
the disciple from practising the morality he taught. This academician
is Socrates, whom his fellow citizens put to death with a cup of
hemlock. This old man is the divine Plato, who, spite of the
sublimity of his doctrine, sold oil for the defrayment of his expenses.
All the rest are men of letters, who, like ourselves, have excited the
envy, and experienced the vengeance of the princes, Archons and
Tyrants, of Athens; and it is now upon these tyrants we unitedly
demand vengeance.”
Then Denis, the tyrant, accompanied by some other princes,
presented themselves and spoke in this manner:—“Of whom do
these old dotards complain? Infatuated by their conceits, they
pretended to dictate law to the whole world! In fact they had so
imbued the people with their dogmas and their customs, that when
we wished to make some changes, they excited sedition. They had
so much pride and presumption, that they arrogated to themselves
alone the possession of common sense and reason; while in truth
they were distinguished but for opinions founded upon vain
subtleties, and by a language not common and familiar to men:—
and now I should like to ask them what certain knowledge they had;
what was their idea upon the nature of the soul? and what
constituted the reason and equity of their laws?”
“I will add to that,” said Julian, the apostate, “that there are
pedants, who, under the affectation of austerity, concealed the most
extreme ambition. Do they complain of the contempt that was
shown them, when their manner of living exposed them to it? Will
they speak of their poverty, who would not labour for a living? The
people of letters deceive themselves if they believe that princes and
the public ought to enrich them for vain and useless sciences.
Should they not make their calculation for that, when, idle in their
cabinets, they amuse themselves in contemplating the figures and
number of the stars, which they apply, to find fault with the common
prejudices of our ancestors?”
“At least,” observed Cato of Utica, “you cannot make those remarks
with regard to Cicero, or myself, who have exercised the highest
magistracies of Rome.”
“Old fox,” answered Julian, “I cannot, it is true, say so of you two;
for if you were attached to letters, you were still more so to your
fortunes. And of whom can you complain, you who accelerated your
own death? Did you not hope to gain an easy immortality in thus
quitting your terrestrial abode? It was to arrive at this, that you did
not wish to survive the pretended misfortunes of your country. Fine
courage that, of a man who kills himself to escape fighting with his
enemies! Would you not have done better to have preserved
yourselves for the defence of Rome, its liberty, and your goods?”
“I recommend you,” said Cato, “to the Antiochians: they will tell the
truth of you better than I can: they know you; they are fully
acquainted with your pusillanimity, your vices, but, above all, with
your vanity, which surpasses your knowledge and eloquence. Look
at this great emperor, who, to punish Antioch, quits the sword,
assumes the pen, and is, after all, nothing but an ignoramus.”
“I am called Suetonius,” said he, who presented himself next.
“Yes, this is Suetonius,” said the emperor Domitian, who was at his
side; “this is that notorious forger, and compiler of histories and
chronicles, who, after the example of other historians, being a
partisan and a flatterer, speaks the truth from caprice, and lies from
inclination.”
“I!” said Suetonius; “I have said nothing that I cannot prove by
indubitable evidence. Is it not true, that upon the testimony of vile
informers, you have taken from the living, the estates of the dead
who were accused? Is it not true that you have levied upon your
subjects tributes so enormous, that they were forced to claim
protection from a foreign power? Is it not true that you have
despoiled the Jews of their goods only because they were born
Jews? Is it then a crime to have been circumcised at birth and not
to adore the gods of the Roman empire? Is it not true that by your
excessive expenses for theatres, and buildings, you have exhausted
the purses of the Romans, and left to perish with hunger the bravest
soldiers of the army? To escape the consequences of a sedition, you
committed horrible pillages, and thus paid your debts. Your pride
and impiety are exhibited in these few words, extracted from one of
your declarations: ‘Your Lord, your God,’ commands thus.”
“What signifies that?” said Domitian: “Are not the emperors gods as
well during their lives as after their death? Were not Augustus and
Cæsar adored in the empire? I was as much a god at the time I
willed it, as my predecessors have been gods after their death. The
divinity of men is nothing but a power superior to that of others, as
the present divinity of Augustus is but a perfection above the virtues
and qualities of living men. But who, among men of sense, has ever
believed that the gods were like men? or adored in the statue any
thing more than the virtue of the original? Who ever believed that
the number of gods was equal to their names, their temples, or their
statues? No, no, Suetonius, you did not believe all this, and it is
from perfidiousness that you have accused me of impiety for being
called a god.”
“And your unjust vexations,” replied Suetonius.
“As it regards that,” said the emperor, “subjects who cannot
penetrate the designs of their sovereigns always consider the
tributes imposed upon them as unjust; but if enemies were about to
inundate the kingdom; if the empire was menaced with approaching
ruin; if there was danger of the pillage and sack of frontier cities,
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