Your Brain On Porn: Internet Pornography and
the Emerging Science of Addiction by Gary
Wilson
When high speed internet became widely available a few years ago, growing numbers of
people began to worry that their porn use was running out of control. Far from preparing
them for fulfilling relationships, viewing an endless stream of porn videos led to unexpected
symptoms. Perhaps most surprisingly, for the first time in history erectile dysfunction was
becoming a significant problem for young men.
This led to one of the largest informal experiments in the history of science. Tens of
thousands of people have tried abstaining from sexually stimulating material in a process
they call ‘rebooting’. Many of them reported startling changes, from improved
concentration and elevated mood to a greater capacity for real-life intimacy.
Gary Wilson has listened to the stories of those who have tried giving up internet porn and
related them to an account of how the reward system of the brain interacts with its
environment. And now a growing body of research in neuroscience is confirming what these
pioneers have discovered for themselves - internet pornography can be seriously addictive
and damaging.
In Your Brain on Porn Wilson provides a concise introduction to the phenomenon of internet
porn addiction that draws on both first-person accounts and the findings of cognitive
neuroscience. In a voice that is generous and humane, he also offers advice for those who
want to stop using internet pornography.
The publication of Your Brain on Porn is a landmark in our attempts to understand, and
remain balanced in, a world where addiction is big business.
Gary Wilson is the presenter of the popular TEDx talk ‘The Great Porn Experiment’ and hosts
the website ‘Your Brain On Porn’, which was created for those seeking to understand and
reverse compulsive porn. He taught anatomy and physiology for years and has long been
interested in the neurochemistry of addiction, mating and bonding. Sadly he died in 2021.
Introduction
Porn often induces a wide range of sexual and psychological problems (discussed below).
How do you know if your problems are porn-related, or something else-related?
1. Go see a doctor.
2. Maturbate to porn
3. Masturbate without porn, and without thinking about it.
If 1 and 2 are fine but you struggle with 3, then your problem is likely porn-related.
Chapter 1: What Are We Dealing With?
In 2006, fast Internet connection enabled the development of Internet tube porn sites. Porn
became widely available.
The brain had never had access to such big sexual stimulation. The orgasm obtained at the
end of masturbating to porn encouraged the brain to reiterate the experience later on,
which creates addictions.
In 2009-2010, some Reddit users began to notice how they were having some ED (erectile
dysfunction) and had lost attraction to girls.
They figured that watching porn had changed the architecture of their brains so that
“normal girls” did no longer turn them on.
In 2010, the website yourbrainonporn.com saw the light, and it became very popular very
quickly. Men had finally a place to discuss symptoms of porn addiction.
The more addicted people were to porn, the more f*cked up their lives were – up to the
point of contemplating suicide.
Most people that quit porn experienced incredible feelings of positivity and well-being after
having done so (spoilers: it has taken them quite a while).
Here are the type of improvements that people that quit porn usually feel:
• No more social anxiety
• More energy
• Clearer, sharper mind
• They looked better
• Desire to interact with women
Here are some side effects of porn addiction:
• Feeling like losing control: Because all you do is porn, you also procrastinate, and
nothing in your life is moving forward.
• Inability to orgasm during sex
• Unreliable erection during sex encounter
• Premature ejaculation: it’s unclear for now how this happens. One solution is that
the body was trained to ejaculate very early through porn consumption.
• Alarming porn tastes: as the brain gets used to the porn, it requires ever more
violent porn to get off
• Loss of attraction to real partners
• Effects on libido: too much porn can prevent you from falling in love.
• Social anxiety and self-esteem: when you stop porn, you want to connect and talk to
others.
• Inability to focus
• Depression
• Low energy, discouragement
• Isolation
• Erectile dysfunction
The following signs often mean there is porn addiction.
• Porn is no longer exciting
• Porn is more exciting than sex
• Sensitivity of penis decreased
• Porn fantasy is necessary to maintain an erection
Chapter 2: Wanting Run Amok
The Coolidge Effect describes how sexual novelty stimulates male brains. If a male rat meets
a receptive female rat, they will copulate until the male rat has had enough.
She wants more, he doesn’t. But give him another female rat and he’ll be extremely
motivated to copulate with that one, until he’s had enough and needs another one, etc.
We’re not rats, but we’re not so far from rats either.
The need for novelty is powered by dopamine. Dopamine compels you to search for
something that feels good, but it doesn’t actually reward you to get it.
Dopamine makes you crave novelty because it is released every time you do new stuff.
When you always do the same stuff, there is no more dopamine released, so you no longer
crave the activity.
You become bored and desensitized.
Internet porn, unfortunately, is unlimited (1). As a result, it’s constantly satisfying the brain.
This leads the addict to open several tabs on his browser and watch several films at once (to
get novelty).
This is because porn is a supranormal stimulus. Supernormal stimuli are stimuli that give you
100X the stimuli you’d receive in nature. Also, porn is much easier to access than sex (2) (it’s
free), and there is a lot of variety (3).
These three reasons (1, 2, 3) make porn particularly addictive.
Finally: there is no limit to porn consumption. With food, there is a moment when your
stomach is full. With porn, it never stops.
Overstimulation
When your brain is overstimulated, it protects itself by naturally decreasing the strength of
the reward, which leads to frustration on your end and compels you to find trashier, more
extreme porn.
Education
Another negative side effect of porn is sex education through porn. Teens, which have never
had sex, learn subconsciously that women enjoy rough sex while women learn they have to
submit entirely to the guy and do painful things during sex.
And since the brain is turned on when watching porn, it associates being turned on with the
things shown on screen, which leads teens to further try to replicate what they have seen in
porn.
Behavior
The way you consume porn also has an impact on your behavior. The mere act of getting
aroused by watching something will train you to become a voyeur.
The mere act of clicking and searching will also be needed to get off.
Addiction
Addiction, finally, is another side effect. Sexual stimuli highjack the brain the same way
cocaine and heroin do. Except that in the case of sex, the addictive nature of it was a feature
of Nature to make sure the species would reproduce.
Addictions (all types) work as follows:
• Craving
• Control: loss of control in engaging with the behavior previously craved.
• Consequences: negative, obviously.
The fact that evolution compels us to look for food and sex means that we’re likely to be
addicted to overstimulation made by food and sex (which explains McDonald’s success).
This makes porn the prime addictive thing to be addicted to, which is backed up by data.
The changes in the brain of porn addicts are similar to the changes in the brain of
substance addicts.
Here’s how addiction shows in the brain:
• Desensitization: it’s the need for ever greater stimulation to reach the desired
reward.
• Sensitization: it’s when neurons wire together to spot the cues that an overstimulus
is going to be received (triggers).
• Hypofrontality: it’s when the brain changes to weaken the willpower you’d need to
resist the craving, making the addictive behavior harder to resist.
• Dysfunctional stress circuit: activates cravings even in presence of minor triggers.
This is exactly what happens to people consuming a huge volume of porn.
Porn desensitization leads to:
• Diminished sexual behavior
• Decreased risk-taking
• Increased anxiety
• Decreased willingness to socialize
• Inability to focus
• Lack of motivation
The problem is that many young men with these symptoms are prescribed drugs and
treatments aimed at alleviating these symptoms. Medical practitioners are not looking for
the cause of the symptoms – but merely to fix the consequences.
This is because medical practitioners neither believe nor know that porn is behind all that.
Chapter 3: Regaining Control
The first step to regaining control is to give your brain a few months to rest from the
artificial sex stimulation (if you’re really addicted, stop masturbating altogether).
The second step is to remain consistent.
Third, cut all artificial sexual stimulation, including Youtube videos or sexting.
Here are a few tips to regain control:
• Remove all porn
• Move your furniture around to decrease cue
• Install a porn blocker (extension)
• Count the number of days since you have been porn-free.
• Extension training: open a porn website then close it right away. Difficult and not
recommended!!!
• Spend less time online
Here’s how you can get support:
• Join a forum or get an accountability partner
• Therapy, support groups
• Daily journaling
How to manage stress:
• Exercise
• Lift weight
• Fast
• Take cold showers
• Walk in nature
• Socialize
• Meditate, relax, do yoga
• Get a hobby to keep your mind occupied with other things
• Limit activities that cause empty dopamine, like junk food, movies, video games,
etc.
Here are some tips about the attitude you should have with yourself.
• Be gentle with yourself
• Learn more about the brain. It will help you see why you decided to stop.
• Keep yourself inspired with books or a personal hero of yours.
Challenges of rebooting
When you deprive the brain of overstimulation, it begs to have it again. Depression as
withdrawal syndrome is frequent. Others experience mood swings.
Here are other symptoms:
• Irritability
• Anxiety or panic attacks
• Unaccustomed tears
• Restlessness
• Lethargy
• Headaches
• Brain fog
• Depression
• Mood swing
• Desire to isolate
• Muscle tightness
• Insomnia
• Severe cravings to use porn
Other less common symptoms:
• Frequent urination
• Shakes
• Nausea
• Tension in the chest that creates difficult breathing
• Despair
• Hot flashes or feeling cold even in front of a fire
• Overeating or loss of appetite
• Unaccustomed wet dreams
• Semen leakage when using the toilet
• Pressure or aching in the testicles
Be careful that recovery isn’t linear. Sometimes, it seems like it is getting worse…until it
doesn’t.
The Flatline
The flatline is a period during which former addicts feel extreme numbness. They don’t
crave sex, girls look unappealing, and their penises look lifeless.
It can last up to two years.
Once the flatline is over, libido comes roaring back (but depends on the person, of course).
Triggers
These are:
• Tv shows and movies with erotic content
• Porn flashbacks
• Morning wood
• Use of recreational drugs or alcohol
• Words that remind you of a porn site/actor
• Suggestive ads
States of mind can also make you relapse.
• Boredom
• Anxiety
• Stress
• Depression
• Loneliness
• Rejection
• Fatigue
• Frustration
• Anger
• Failure
• Feeling sorry for yourself
• Desire to reward yourself for an accomplishment
• Overconfidence
• Jealousy
• Hangovers
• Procrastination
Make sure you notice your triggers, the little events or things that urge you to watch porn.
Avoid these triggers as much as possible.
When you feel the urge, directly do something different. Going for a walk works well.
Beware that if you have sex, you may have strong urges to watch porn again.
Beware that “imagining” and fantasizing about porn activates the same neural pathways as
actually doing it.
As a result, avoid doing that. Don’t look at women in bikinis either. Don’t get into anything
that is empty in dopamine, or that is remotely related to porn.
FAQ
• How long does the reboot take?
It depends on people. Aim 90 days, then see.
• Is sex allowed?
Some think it’s better to leave the brain rest from any sexual activity. If you do have sex, try
to have gentle, simple sex, without orgasms.
• Should I reduce masturbation?
The more addicted you are, the more you need to reduce masturbation. DO NOT imagine
porn, or think about porn, or fantasies when masturbating. As we said, there are very few
differences between imagining and actually watching.
