FATHER TO SON

About the Poet – Elizabeth Jennings (1926–2001)

 An English poet, born in Boston, Lincolnshire.

 Known for her lyrical style, simplicity, and emotional depth.
 Often wrote about themes of relationships, religion, and human emotions.
 Her poetry is deeply personal, yet universal in appeal.
 Called one of the most important female voices in post-war British poetry.

Summary:
Elizabeth Jennings’ poem “Father to Son” explores the strained relationship between
a father and his son. The father feels alienated, admitting he does not understand his
son despite living in the same house. Their bond of childhood affection is lost, and
silence now surrounds them. The father wishes his son would return like the
“prodigal son” from the Bible, and he is ready to forgive him. Both father and son
stretch out empty hands, symbolizing failed attempts at communication. The poem
highlights the pain of the generation gap, where love exists but is overshadowed by
lack of understanding. It suggests that only patience, forgiveness, and acceptance
can heal such broken relationships.
Themes
 Generation gap – failure to understand each other.
 Communication gap – silence and distance in relationships.
 Alienation – emotional estrangement despite closeness.
 Forgiveness & reconciliation – father ready to forgive.
 Helplessness – “empty hands” show failed attempts.
 Parental love – deep affection beneath conflict

Literary Devices
 Paradox – “I do not understand this child.”
 Alliteration – “Silence surrounds us.”
 Allusion – Biblical prodigal son.
 Metaphor – “Empty hand” = failed connection.
 Symbolism – silence = gap, house = closeness, empty hand = helplessness.
 Irony – same house but no understanding.

Extract Based questions – 1

“I do not understand this child
Though we have lived together now
In the same house for years.
I know nothing of him, so try to build
Up a relationship from how he was when small.”

Q1. What does the father’s confession in these lines reveal about his
relationship with his son?
Ans. It shows the emotional distance between them. Despite living in the same
house, he feels like a stranger to his son.

Q2. Identify the literary device in “I do not understand this child.”

Ans. Paradox – The father calls him “this child,” yet admits he does not understand
him, showing contradiction in closeness and distance.

Q3. What does the phrase “how he was when small” suggest about the
father’s longing?
Ans. It reflects the father’s nostalgia for his son’s childhood days when their bond
was warm and affectionate.

Q4. What universal theme is highlighted in this extract?

Ans. The theme of generation gap—parents often struggle to understand their
grown-up children despite living together.

Extract – 2
“Father and son, we both must live
On the same globe and the same land,
He speaks: I cannot understand
Myself, why anger grows from grief.
We each put out an empty hand.”

Q1. What is the irony in “same globe and same land”?

Ans. Though they share the same world and home, they fail to share emotional
closeness, highlighting tragic irony.

Q2. What inner conflict does the son express?

Ans. The son admits he cannot understand himself, and his grief often turns into
anger, showing confusion and frustration.

Q3. Explain the symbolic meaning of “empty hand.”

Ans. It symbolizes failed attempts at reconciliation. Both want to connect, but their
efforts remain incomplete and unfulfilled.

Q4. How does this stanza sum up the central idea of the poem?
Ans. It shows the father–son relationship caught between love and estrangement.
Both desire closeness but remain divided by silence and misunderstanding.

Short Answer Questions (30 - 40 words)

Q1. The poem “Father to Son” highlights the emotional distance between
generations. What lesson does it teach us about maintaining healthy
relationships in a family?
Ans. The poem teaches that communication and understanding are essential in
family relationships. Silence and lack of dialogue create alienation even within the
same house. Love, forgiveness, and acceptance help in bridging the generation gap.
We must respect differences yet remain emotionally connected.
2. The father in the poem chooses forgiveness instead of anger. What does
this reveal about the importance of patience and empathy in relationships?
Ans. The father realizes that anger or authority cannot bring his son closer. Instead,
he opts for forgiveness and patience. This shows that empathy and compassion
strengthen bonds. True relationships survive not by control but by love, care, and
acceptance.
3. Why does the father feel helpless in the poem?
Ans. The father feels helpless because his son does not respond to his emotions.
Though he wants to bridge the gap, his efforts fail. The silence and distance between
them leave him confused and sorrowful.

4. “We each put out an empty hand.” What values are reflected in this line?
How can they guide us in our real life?
Ans. This line reflects the values of reconciliation, humility, and the human desire for
connection. In real life, we often struggle with misunderstandings, but we must take
the first step towards healing. Extending a hand, even if empty, shows hope for
renewal.

5. What does the poem “Father to Son” suggest about balancing individuality
and family bonds? (solution)
Ans. The poem suggests that children should have freedom to build their own world,
but not at the cost of losing family ties. Individuality and relationships must co-exist.
Respect for personal choices along with mutual love ensures a balanced and happy
family life.

Long Answer Questions (120–150 words each)

Q1. Discuss the father’s feelings as portrayed in the poem “Father to Son.”
Ans. In the poem, the father expresses deep sorrow over his broken relationship with
his son. Although they live in the same house, he feels like a stranger to him. The
father cannot recognize his own image in his son, which makes him feel alienated.
He admits that communication has failed between them and regrets that his love has
not been returned with the same warmth. The father feels helpless because the son
does not respond to his attempts to reach out. However, instead of anger, he
chooses forgiveness and reconciliation. He wants to rebuild the relationship,
suggesting that love and understanding, not authority, can bridge the gap. The poem
reflects the universal conflict between generations and the pain of emotional
distance within families.
Q2. How does Elizabeth Jennings highlight the generation gap in “Father to
Son”?
Ans. Elizabeth Jennings presents the universal problem of the generation gap in her
poem. The father and son live under the same roof but are emotionally far apart. The
father feels estranged, as if the son belongs to another world. He admits he cannot
understand his son’s thoughts, choices, or feelings. The son, on the other hand,
remains silent and distant, refusing to share his inner world. This lack of
communication widens their emotional gap. The father realizes that anger or
scolding will not help, so he pleads for forgiveness and a fresh beginning. Jennings
uses simple yet powerful words to portray the pain of alienation between
generations. The poem emphasizes that only love, acceptance, and mutual respect
can overcome the generation gap and heal broken family bonds.