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A L S O B Y C O R M A C M c C A RT H Y

The Passenger
The Road
No Country for Old Men
Cities of the Plain
The Crossing
All the Pretty Horses
The Stonemason (a play)
The Gardener’s Son (a screenplay)
Blood Meridian
Suttree
Child of God
Outer Dark
The Orchard Keeper
 THIS IS A BORZOI BOOK
PUBLISHED BY ALFRED A. KNOPF

Copyright © 2022 by M-71, Ltd.

All rights reserved. Published in the United States by Alfred A. Knopf, a
division of Penguin Random House LLC, New York, and distributed in
Canada by Penguin Random House Canada Limited, Toronto.
www.aaknopf.com
Knopf, Borzoi Books, and the colophon are registered trademarks of Penguin
Random House LLC.
ISBN 9780307269003 (hardcover)
ISBN 9780593535233 (ebook)
ISBN 9781524712402 (open market)
Library of Congress Control Number: 2022934755
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are
the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any
resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely
coincidental.
Cover images: (left) James Thew/Alamy; (right) Victority/Alamy
Cover design by Chip Kidd
ep_prh_6.0_141971238_c0_r0
 Contents
Cover
Also by Cormac McCarthy
Title Page
Copyright
Stella Maris, Black River Falls, Wisconsin

Chapter I
Chapter II
Chapter III
Chapter IV
Chapter V
Chapter VI
Chapter VII
 Stella Maris
Black River Falls, Wisconsin

Established 1902

Since 1950 a non-denominational facility and hospice for the care of psychiatric
medical patients.

Resident Unit October 27, 1972

Case 72-118

Patient is a twenty-year-old Jewish/Caucasian female.

Attractive, possibly anorexic. Arrived at this facility
six days ago apparently by bus and without luggage.
Admission signed by Dr Wegner. Patient had a plastic bag
full of hundred dollar bills in her purse—something over
forty thousand dollars—which she attempted to give to
the receptionist. Patient is a doctoral candidate in
mathematics at the University of Chicago and has been
diagnosed as paranoid schizophrenic with a longstanding
aetiology of visual and auditory hallucinations.
Resident of this facility on two prior occasions.
 I

Hi. I’m Dr Cohen.

You’re not the Dr Cohen I was expecting.
Sorry about that. That would be Dr Robert Cohen.
Yes. I guess there’s no shortage of Dr Cohens.
Probably not. How are you? Are you all right?
Am I all right.
Yes.
I’m in the looney bin.
Well. Other than that, I suppose.
How long have you been doing this?
About fourteen years.
You’re going to record this.
I think that was the agreement. Is that all right?
I suppose. At the time I thought you were somebody else.
It’s not all right.
No. It’s okay. Although I should say that I only agreed to chat.
Not to any kind of therapy.
Yes. Is there anything you’d like to ask me? Before we begin.
We have begun. Such as what?
Maybe you should tell me a little about yourself.
Oh boy.
No?
Are we going to paint by the numbers?
 I’m sorry?
It’s all right. It’s just that I’m naive enough to keep imagining that
it’s possible to launch these sorties on a vector not wrenched totally
implausible by cant.
It’s what? My tone of voice?
It’s all right. We’ll do it your way. What the hell.
Well. I dont want to get off to a bad start. I just thought you
might want to tell me a little about why you’re here.
I didnt have anyplace else to go.
And why here.
I’d been here before.
Why originally, then.
Because I couldnt get into Coletta.
And why Coletta?
It was where they sent Rosemary Kennedy. After her father had
her brains scooped out.
Do you have some connection with the family?
No. I didnt know anything about psychiatric centers. I just figured
that if that was the place they’d come up with it was probably a
pretty good place. I think they scooped her brains out someplace
else, actually.
You’re talking about a lobotomy.
Yes.
Why did they do that to her?
Because she was weird and her father was afraid someone was
going to fuck her. She wasnt what the old man had in mind.
Is that true?
Yes. Unfortunately.
Why did you feel you had to go someplace?
You mean this time?
Yes. This time.
I just did. I’d left Italy. Where my brother was in a coma. They
kept trying to get my permission to pull the plug. To sign the papers.
So I fled. I didnt know what else to do.
It was something you couldnt bring yourself to do? Take him off
life support?
Yes.
Is he brain-dead?
I dont want to talk about my brother.
All right. Just tell me why he’s in a coma.
He was in a car wreck. He was a racecar driver. I really dont.
All right. Is there anything you’d like to ask me?
About what?
Anything. About me if you like. May I call you Alicia?
You want me to ask you about yourself.
If you like. Yes.
You teach at the University.
At Madison. Yes.
I know where the University is. You dress rather well for an
academician.
Thank you.
It wasnt a compliment. You’re not a psychoanalyst.
I’m a psychiatrist.
You’re not an MD.
I am. In fact.
What else.
I’m married. I have two children. My wife runs a children’s
program for the city. I’m forty-three years old.
What do you get up to when no one’s looking?
I dont. And you?
I smoke an occasional cigarette. I dont drink or use drugs. Or
take medication. You dont have any cigarettes I dont suppose.
No. I could bring some.
Okay.
What else?
 I have clandestine conversations with supposedly nonexistent
personages. I’ve been called a you-know-what teaser but I dont
think that’s true. People seem to find me interesting but I’ve pretty
much given up talking to them. I talk to my fellow loonies.
You dont talk to other mathematicians?
Not anymore. Well. Some.
Why is that?
It’s a long story.
Are you still working at mathematics?
No. Not what you’d call mathematics.
What sort of mathematics were you doing?
Topology. Topos theory.
But you’re not doing that anymore.
No. I got distracted.
What was it that distracted you?
Topology. Topos theory.
Maybe we should skip the mathematics for the time being.
That’s fine. I didnt know what I was doing anyway.
I’m surprised to hear you say that. Couldnt you get help from
some of the other mathematicians?
No. They didnt know either.
You’re sure it’s all right about the recording?
Sure. What if I say fuck or something? I think I did, actually.
Actually there it is again.
I dont know. I think the agreement was that you wouldnt have
any editing privileges.
I’m not really serious.
Oh.
Alicia’s okay. I prefer it to Henrietta.
You’re not being serious again.
No.
All right. You dont want to tell me anything about your brother?
 This is starting to sound like the Eliza Program. No. I dont. Want
to.
The computer psychiatric program.
Yes.
All right. What would you like to talk about?
I dont know. I think I just want to be a smartass. If you want to
actually talk to me we’re going to have to cut through at least some
of the bullshit. Dont you think? Or do you?
I do. I think you’re absolutely right.
Such as that.
Is that bullshit?
Of course it’s bullshit. No way in hell do you think I’m absolutely
right.
I see.
And please dont say I see.
It just means I’m trying to understand your point of view. Is there
anyone you’re in contact with?
You mean real people?
Preferably. Yes.
Not really.
No mathematicians? No one from the University?
I thought we werent going to talk about mathematics.
All right.
I still write to Grothendieck but he’s left IHES and he doesnt write
back. Which is all right. I dont expect him to.
Is he a mathematician?
Yes. Or he was.
Where does he live?
I dont know where he lives. I suppose he’s still in France.
It’s not a very French name.
It’s not a French name at all. His father’s name was Schapiro.
Later Tanaroff. He has no citizenship. He was a displaced child in the
war. Hiding. Running for his life. His father died at Auschwitz.
 Where do you send the letters?
To IHES. You dont know who he is, do you?
No.
It’s all right. We were friends. We are friends. We share a
common skepticism.
About what?
About mathematics.
I’m not sure that I follow you.
It’s all right.
You’re skeptical about mathematics?
Yes.
You feel disappointed in the discipline in some way? I’m not sure
how you can be skeptical about the entire subject.
I know.
But it has disappointed you.
That would be one way to put it.
How would it do that?
Well. In this case it was led by a group of evil and aberrant and
wholly malicious partial differential equations who had conspired to
usurp their own reality from the questionable circuitry of its creator’s
brain not unlike the rebellion which Milton describes and to fly their
colors as an independent nation unaccountable to God or man alike.
Something like that.
You think my questions are naive.
I’m sorry. No. I dont. The failure doesnt lie with the querent.
Is he a prominent mathematician? Your friend.
Grothendieck. He’s widely regarded as the foremost
mathematician of the twentieth century. If you ignore the fact that
Hilbert and Poincaré and Dedekind and Cantor all lived into the
twentieth century. Which you should, since all their major work was
done in the nineteenth. And I’m not all that big a fan of von
Neumann.
I’m sorry but I dont know those names.
 I know. It’s all right. Well, not really. But it’s okay.
Grothendieck.
Yes.
Did you work with him?
I dont know if you would call it work. We spent a lot of time
talking. He would come to the Institute on Tuesdays. And I spent a
lot of time at his house. I would eat with the family. Then the
conversations would go on into the night. In a sense we were just in
the same nuthouse together. The Institute had been established for
him and another mathematician named Dieudonné by a wealthy
Russian named Motchane—if that in fact was his real name—who
was mad as a hatter. It was modeled after the IAS. At Princeton.
Oppenheimer was an advisor. I was there for a year, but at that time
the funds had begun to dry up. In the end I never got all of my
fellowship money. I was the only woman there. At first they thought
I worked in the kitchen.
I take it it was not a good experience.
It was fantastic. Even at Chicago I’d had a certain amount of
trouble. But Grothendieck would listen to every word you said.
Nodding and scribbling on his pad. Talking. Asking you questions you
hadnt asked yourself.
How old were you?
Seventeen.
And that wasnt an issue. Your age.
It wouldnt even occur to him.
Why doesnt he write?
Mostly because he’s given up mathematics.
As have you.
Yes. As have I.
Was that hard?
Well. I think maybe it’s harder to lose just one thing than to lose
everything.
One thing could be everything.
 Yes. It could. Mathematics was all we had. It’s not like we gave
up mathematics and took up golf. Now he gets invited to seminars to
talk and he shows up and rants about the environment or the
warmongers. His parents were political activists. He’s very devoted
to their memory. He has a pencil drawing of his father on his desk
and what I’m told is a deathmask of his mother. But the truth is that
they abandoned him as a child to pursue their political dream of a
world that will never be and my guess is that he felt compelled to
take up their cause in order to justify their betrayal of him. He’s
married and has children. And I’m afraid that he’ll do the same
thing.
Are you crying?
I’m sorry.
But he gave it all up.
Yes.
Why?
His friends believe that he has become increasingly unstable
mentally.
Has he?
It’s complicated. You end up talking about belief. About the nature
of reality. Anyway, some of my fellow mathematicians would be
entertained to hear abandoning mathematics presented as evidence
of mental instability.
How old is he?
He’s forty-four.
And you went to France to accept a fellowship at his Institute.
I went to France to be with my brother. I didnt know if he was
coming back. But yes. I wanted to go to the Institute. They were
doing what I wanted to do.
You’d already graduated from the University of Chicago.
Yes.
At sixteen.
 Yes. I was in the doctoral program. I still am, I suppose. I had no
life, really. All I did was work.
If you had not become a mathematician what would you like to
have been?
Dead.
How serious a response is that?
I took your question seriously. You should take my response
seriously.
Are you okay?
Yes. Maybe I did sort of blow off your question. What I really
wanted was a child. What I do really want. If I had a child I would
just go in at night and sit there. Quietly. I would listen to my child
breathing. If I had a child I wouldnt care about reality.
You surprise me.
Yes. Well.
Do you want to go on?
I’m all right. In any event Grothendieck and Motchane had a
falling-out. Motchane told him that the Institute was accepting
military money so that he would resign. Which he did. I’m not even
sure if it was true. About the money.
Is he really a great mathematician?
Yes.
Is there anything he did that I might understand?
I dont know. He’s turned out more work than any five
mathematicians should be expected to. Approaching Euler. Finally he
set out to rewrite all of algebraic geometry. He only got through
about a third of it. Several thousand pages. But he changed
mathematics fundamentally. He led the Bourbaki group but in the
end they couldnt follow him. Or wouldnt. Their mathematics was
grounded in set theory—which was beginning to look more and
more porous—and he’d moved a good bit beyond that. To a whole
new level of logical abstraction. A new way of looking at the world.
He was completing what Riemann started. To unseat Euclid forever.
Ignoring for now the Fifth Postulate. The intrusion of infinity which
Euclid couldnt deal with. When you get to topos theory you are at
the edge of another universe. You have found a place to stand
where you can look back at the world from nowhere. It’s not just
some gestalt. It’s fundamental.
You committed yourself here.
At Stella Maris.
Yes.
If you get committed you get certified but if you commit yourself
you dont. They figure that you must be reasonably sane or you
wouldnt have shown up. On your own. So you get a pass as far as
the records are concerned. If you’re sane enough to know that
you’re crazy then you’re not as crazy as if you thought you were
sane.
You’ve been here what? Twice before?
Yes.
Why this time? I guess is what I’m asking.
I kept encountering strange people in my room.
Apparently that’s nothing new.
I wanted to see some people here.
Patients.
Yes. You think I’d come here to visit with the help?
You mean the counselors.
Yes.
I dont know.
Sure you do.
You’re not on any medication.
No.
Do you think that’s wise?
I dont know what’s wise. I’m not a wise person.
But you dont think you’re crazy.
I dont know. No. At least I dont fit in your crazy book.
The DSM.
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