Applied Mathematics by Dan Simpson
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Dan Simpson is a versatile spoken word poet, known for his roles as a compère and workshop facilitator, with a tenure as Canterbury's laureate and residencies at notable venues. He has performed at major events across the UK, co-hosts spoken word events, and has published poetry appearing on various media platforms. The document also includes creative poetry pieces that explore themes like structure, identity, and postmodernism.
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Applied Mathematics by Dan Simpson
- 2. Dan Simpson is a spoken word poet, compère, live literature projects and events organiser, and workshop facilitator. He was Canterbury’s Laureate 2013-14, Poet in Residence at Waterloo Station for Transport for London, Bexley’s poet for Southbank Centre’s London Lines project, and Canterbury’s Roman Museum Poet in Residence. Dan has performed at both a hen party and a death metal gig, as well as at major festivals, events, and venues around the UK. Appearances include: Glastonbury Festival, The National Theatre, Southbank Centre, Roundhouse, BBC Radio, BBC Edinburgh Slam, Bang Said the Gun, Tongue Fu, Literary Death Match, Hit the Ode, Utter!, and Festival of the Spoken Nerd. He was Larmer Tree Festival’s Lyrical Laureate in 2014. He co-produces and co-hosts regular spoken word events Stand Up & Slam and The Anti-Slam, and is resident host of The Word House. His poetry has featured on the BBC and London Underground, and in publications from Sidekick Books and Inc. Magazine. Dan regularly delivers workshops for both adults and young people, working as a Poet Coach on Apples and Snakes’ poetry in education project Spoke ‘n’ Word. He also creates pioneering work with crowdsourced and outdoor poetry, and has done so for organisations such at the Royal Academy of Arts, European Commission, and Beaney Art Museum and Library. www.dansimpsonpoet.co.uk
- 4. Copyright © 2014 Dan Simpson The author asserts the moral right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means without the prior written consent of Burning Eye Books, nor be otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser. This edition published by Burning Eye Books 2014 www.burningeye.co.uk @burningeye Burning Eye Books 15 West Hill, Portishead, BS20 6LG ISBN 978 1 90913 637 3
- 5. The Man from Land’s End There once was a Man from Land’s End whose limerick just wouldn’t end it broke out of its structure its rhyme system got ruptured its conceit was punctured its workings uncovered its constraints were smothered and the Man from Land’s End will now suffer. The limerick on which he depends has completely gone off the deep end this poem for him I’ve not penned and I don’t know which way it will wend. The Man from Land’s End is an outcast who somehow got mixed up in my craft found his way to my rhyme thought he was sublime and the question now is who will outlast the other: creator, or character because even though it’s supposed to be his own the Man from Land’s End does not fit into this poem. The Man from Land’s End is a bluffer a double meaning who went undercover he thought he’d be one thing a meaningful something but he’s ended up as another and this isn’t simple like rhyming (though here is the metre and timing) no: this is something much tougher. The Man from Land’s End is a symbol a figure from which I can kindle some embers of gleaning some fire of dreaming to reach the white heat of meaning together little by little. 9
- 6. I want a poem about how he ticks constrained by the form set by limericks something quite charming a little disarming to show off a few verbal tricks. But the Man from Land’s End is resourceful won’t be coerced to my needs if I’m forceful so though it may make me remorseful and destroy the core on which this limerick depends… I might have to kill the Man from Land’s End. Throw him into a metaphor say he is something else altogether because it may be better for this poem if he’s in the ether. So. You know what? Yes. The Man from Land’s End is a symbol he’s not even a character any more I’ve written him out of existence because that’s the price you pay for striving to be something greater than the mind of your creator. So there once was a Man from Land’s End whose limerick just wouldn’t end it didn’t even get started, really because he wasn’t in this limerick at all. 10
- 7. Science Fiction Where is my teleportation? Where is my robot hand? Where is my genome alteration? Where is my apocalyptic wasteland? Where is my travelling through time? Where is my shrinking ray? Where is my cyborg crime? And all those other sci-fi clichés? Where is my laser sword? Where is my telepathic wave? Where is the invading alien horde? Where is my cyberslave? Where is my virtual reality? Where is my spaceship to the stars? Where is my immortality? But mainly: where the fuck is my hover car? 14
- 8. Time – that other physical property although deformed and d-i-l-a-t-e-d will gradually return everything to a sense of stability the loss will shrink become small always there part of you: normal. 19
- 9. Postmodern Post Office We’re a postmodern post office: we don’t deal in packages we only handle concepts. We don’t have pigeonholes we don’t like to label why stamp on an identity when it’s quite clearly unstable? What does “first class” even mean anyway? like we’re judging some things better than other things because they’re worth more? No. We don’t get lost in the male concept of the feminine we try to be ourselves whatever that means we try to be genuine. There is no postmaster we don’t do hierarchy no wage slaves no wages: we’re post-Capitalist which is to say we don’t make any money we’re even post-ironic which is to say we’re really not that funny. We’re a postmodern post office don’t call us Royal Mail for it’s only ceremonial and we’d rather reassure you that we’re certainly post-colonial. 22
- 10. We’re post-Structuralism too post structure in that we don’t have a building just a series of semantic constructs that we know you find appealing. Though knowledge is relative truth a subjective matter read the signs, between the lines either astronomical or astrological it’s all the same, really if we’re being epistemological. WE ARE POST OFFICE: you say you didn’t get your letter? well post hoc ergo propter hoc (you really should know better). We deal with the post, man a post-mankind environment it’s why there are no staff here thanks for queuing and being compliant. We’re not at the cashier windows we’ve bigger fish to fry we’re considering big questions heavy lifting for the mind. We’re a postmodern Post Office no postmen or women we’re post people post caring if we’re honest post emotion post feeling. 23