021 180718 Road Less Traveled Chapter 2 Part 2 - Love
Download as PPTX, PDF0 likes155 views
The document discusses themes of love, dependency, and self-sacrifice, emphasizing that true love allows for individual independence rather than attachment. It differentiates between love as a nurturing force and dependency as a parasitic relationship, suggesting that individuals should learn self-acceptance and express their own needs. Additionally, it critiques the misconception of self-sacrifice as a form of love, advocating for a balance between caring for others and caring for oneself.
![DEPENDENCY
I do not want to live
I cannot live without you
[husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend/etc]
I love him [or her] so much
You are mistaken. It’s a dependency.
When you require another individual
for your survival, you are a parasite
on that individual (negative attachment).
There is no choice, no freedom
involved in your relationship. It is
a matter of necessity rather than love.
TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE
Copyright Illustration by Brian Rea Instagram.com/freebrianrea](https://image.slidesharecdn.com/180708pptbookclubrltloveris-roc-180714035430/85/021-180718-Road-Less-Traveled-Chapter-2-Part-2-Love-6-320.jpg)
![DEPENDENCY
TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE
Passive dependent people are:
- So busy seeking to be loved from others
that they have no energy left to love back
that person or even themselves.
- Never feel “full-filled”.
They basically feel that others
are responsible for their unhappiness.
- Have no real sense of identity.
They define themselves solely by
their relationships.
I.e. a husband, a wife, a mother, a father, a child,
a girlfriend, a boyfriend, a student, a [certain job], etc.](https://image.slidesharecdn.com/180708pptbookclubrltloveris-roc-180714035430/85/021-180718-Road-Less-Traveled-Chapter-2-Part-2-Love-7-320.jpg)
021 180718 Road Less Traveled Chapter 2 Part 2 - Love
- 1. BOOKCLUB ROAD LESS TRAVELED 180714 Chapter: Love :: Dependency :: Cathexis Without Love :: Self-sacrifice GAMBAR COVER BUKU/ GAMBAR PENDUKUNG LAIN TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE
- 2. PREVIOUSLY Chapter 1 – Discipline Chapter 2 – Love TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE
- 3. Problems & Pain + Life is difficult, but we have discipline as a tool to overcome it + Problem? Take time to analyze, then develop effective solution + There’s no way to avoid problem Neurosis & Character Disorder + Examine yourself. Accept. Fix. Escape from Freedom + Accept your problem + As a human, you have CHOICE Dedication to Reality, Transference & Challenge + The outdated map > UPDATE it + Painful, but as long as we are disciplined. . . TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE
- 4. Love Defined + Human spiritual evolution = discipline = LOVE + Love is the will to extend one’s self for the purpose of nurturing one’s own or another’s spiritual growth” Falling in Love + FALLING IN LOVE is effortless = LOVE is efforful. The Myth of Romantic Love + There’s no life like fairy tales of princes and princesses. Ego Boundaries + Ego boundaries must be hardened before they can be softened + An identity must be established before it can be transcended + One must find one's self before one can lose it (give it up) TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE
- 5. DEPENDENCY TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE
- 6. DEPENDENCY I do not want to live I cannot live without you [husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend/etc] I love him [or her] so much You are mistaken. It’s a dependency. When you require another individual for your survival, you are a parasite on that individual (negative attachment). There is no choice, no freedom involved in your relationship. It is a matter of necessity rather than love. TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE Copyright Illustration by Brian Rea Instagram.com/freebrianrea
- 7. DEPENDENCY TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE Passive dependent people are: - So busy seeking to be loved from others that they have no energy left to love back that person or even themselves. - Never feel “full-filled”. They basically feel that others are responsible for their unhappiness. - Have no real sense of identity. They define themselves solely by their relationships. I.e. a husband, a wife, a mother, a father, a child, a girlfriend, a boyfriend, a student, a [certain job], etc.
- 8. How they become like that? - Lack of love in their childhood. Parents failed to fulfill their needs for affection, attention, and care during their childhood. - Lack of self-discipline from their childhood. Parents failed to be a disciplined role model. They are enter adulthood with an inner sense of insecurity, lack of resposibility of themselves. Other case: it could manifest to an “addictive personality” on drugs & alcohol. DEPENDENCY TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE
- 9. Two people love each other only when they are quite capable of living without each other but CHOOSE to live with each other. TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE Copyright Illustration by Brian Rea Instagram.com/freebrianrea Healthy couples instinctively will switch roles from time to time. In a sense, each spouse is training himself or herself for survival in the event of the loss of the other.
- 10. CATHEXIS without love TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE
- 11. - Cathexis extremely limited in communicate. - Pets satisfactory only insofar as their wills coincide with ours. - In our relationship with pets we seek to foster their dependency. It is their attachment to us rather than their independence from us that we value in our pets. CATHEXIS WITHOUT LOVE TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE
- 12. CATHEXIS WITHOUT LOVE TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE Study case: Imelda Marcos
- 13. CATHEXIS WITHOUT LOVE TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE Study case: rich parent
- 14. CATHEXIS WITHOUT LOVE TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE Study case: Sasaeng Fans
- 15. CATHEXIS WITHOUT LOVE TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE LOVE = GROWING (nurturing) CATHEXIS = NOT GROWING
- 16. SELF SACRIFICE TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE
- 17. SELF SACRIFICE TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE I do it all for you I didn’t do it for myself It’s all denying oneself. They might be confused what is real love. They maintain their self image as “loving”, “caring”, “compasionate”, “good person”. They didn’t realize it infanting others and actually losing themselves. Copyright ScreencaptionMV by BTS
- 18. SELF SACRIFICE TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE Sadism is the practice of obtaining pleasure by inflicting pain and suffering on another. Masochism is the practice of obtaining pleasure by infliction pain and suffering on oneself. Sadomasochism is the practice of obtaining pleasure by both inflicting pain and having pain inflicted upon oneself. mislead self sacrifice
- 19. SELF SACRIFICE The issue of masochism highlights still another very major misconception about love- that it is self-sacrifice. Whenever we think of ourselves as doing something for someone else, we are in some way denying our own responsibility. Whatever we do for someone else we choose to because it fulfills a need we have. Whatever we do is done because we choose to do it, and we make that choice because it is the one that satisfies us the most. TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE
- 20. SELF SACRIFICE TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE Learn to accept onself. Learn to express your own needs, anger, resentments & expectations. It’s all healthy to the mental health of your own and your family as the self sacrifice (and therefore that love) must be manifest in confrontation as much as in beatific acceptance.
- 21. THANK YOU TRLT: DEPENDENCY, CATHEXIS, SELF-SACRIFICE
- 22. THANK YOU lia s. Associates