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Andrew Perez
Professor Kathy Rowley
English 201-19
30 May 2012
Argumentative Essay:
Stay at home Moms vs. Working Moms
If a woman cant stay at home with her kids, then maybe she just shouldnt have

them!(Brennan). Heidi Brennan is a stay at home mom who believes if a woman were to have

children, her number one priority should be to take care of her children and not have to worry

about anything else. On the other hand there are other mothers who have no support and have to

work to give their child or children what they need. Making the decision to stay home with your

kids or join the workforce can be a difficult process. For a lot of parents it is damaging for them

to be away from their kids for more than a few hours a day, and that is a big reason why we have

stay at home moms. Research has demonstrated that the early relationship between infants and

preschoolers is the foundation of all subsequent personality development. People say that

children benefit from having a working mom. On the other side of this argument the stay at home

moms believe that children do not do well with large separations of time. There are many issues

to talk about when this topic comes up but the main issue is the way it affects the children. Moms

should want to give their children more than they ever had so being a working mom would be a

better path for their family.

In today's society if you walk up to a women and ask what is her career, if the answer is

I'm a stay-at-home mom people might tend to look down on her, but if she is a working mom,

they might ask, how do you do it all? This happens to many women and it makes it harder for

them to choose between their children and work, leaving them second guessing (Business Week,

2000). But for the first time in 25 years the percentage of new moms returning to work has fallen

from 59% in 1998 to 55% in 2000 (Fox, 2002). On the contrary, from 1975 to 1990, the work

labor force for woman has grown steadily and women with children account for most of the
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increase (Hayghe, 1998). It is interesting to note that all of the statistical information on this

subject is controversial, but it also shows that more women have a lifestyle choice instead of an

economic choice. It all comes down to if women are happier working or staying at home with

their children. It is a choice that all mothers must make, but how it affects their children is still

debatable.
There are many good things to come from a working mom for a child. One of the best

things that come from this is how it can keep the family good financially. The money working

mothers earn is advantageous to both their children and their families. When there is no money

there is no happiness. Children who are in day care starting from one month on will have a

better language and cognitive ability than children at home.(Peters). Every parent usually wants

there child to have a social life and statistics show that children that are in a daycare develop

more social skills than children that are just kept at home. Being a working mom could also

benefit the mother. A great thing is there is a feeling of satisfaction while the mother is at work; it

makes the mom a happier person, and therefore a better mother. Working is better for a woman's

personal growth. Children who have working mothers are more likely to be independent and

mature than children with full-time mothers. In my opinion having a working mom just lets a kid

have a real childhood. A kid without a childhood is usually empty inside when they grow up and

have nothing to talk about when they get a little older.

In the book When Mothers Work by Joan K. Peters she argues that mothers should

work outside the home and men must take half the responsibility for child care, in order to create

a richer parenting experience, stronger marriages, and happier children. "If the child is mothered

by a parent who is feeling frustrated and depressed and empty, that is not a good thing,"([Link])

A happy child brings a happy mother and a happy mother brings a happy family. With a child

growing up he or she needs to be in a positive environment. If they are around a negative

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environment they could grow up to be scarred for the rest of their life and sometimes not be as

successful later on in their future. A working mom definitely keeps everything on track and with

everything on track keeps everyone happy. One of the main reasons moms keep working is to

keep the family good financially but working also really benefits the mother as well. When a

mother has a child her hopes and dreams for a career shouldnt be thrown out the door, she

should still be able to pursue them. So a working mom could be either trying to keep working or

either working on trying to get themselves better educated and pursuing their future career by

going to college. There is a lot of help for woman who are pregnant or who have children that are

trying to make it in college. From all the mothers out there nearly three quarters of all mothers

are in the labor force.

Negatives also come across the working moms. Some that they might not admit but it

definitely crosses there mind. While at work there is sadness from the mother wanting to be with

their children and knowing they cant. Children usually cry when their mother leaves their side

and the mom never wants to turn her back on her baby. A huge issue a mother could face is the

possibility of missing out on an important event in the childs life. For example the childs first

steps, childs first real words, or the childs first day of school. One thing no mother wants is

having to share the role of motherhood with a stranger. Most mothers have parents to watch after

their baby but some dont and have to take them to a daycare. Most moms have no choice but to

put them in a daycare whether they feel comfortable to do it or not. With their child being away

from them they might be getting taught things the mothers personally wouldnt want their child

to be taught. So as the kid grows up the child might get raised a whole different way than what

the mother had in mind. Psychologists claim babies that are separated from their mothers might

turn out to be troubled later in life, more likely to act out in school, and have poor relationships

as adults.
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There are also lots of people out there who argue against this. Specifically stay at home

moms. There is not a big number when it comes to stay at home moms but they sure do know

how to prove there point. A great thing to come from this is a stay at home mother gets to have

her eyes on her child at all times. She would not have to worry about something bad happening

to the child and for mothers they are always worrying about their babies. What mother would not

want to watch their baby grow up and take their first step? Every mother would, being able to

watch one's child grow provides enormous gratification for a mother. A child feels way more

secure when a mom does not work and is there with the child. Children's values and morals can

be guided and the children can be disciplined more consistently.

Stay at home mothers have enough to worry about while taking care of their child, but the

way stay at home moms are being looked at and talked about from everybody goes through their

head as well. People all around stereotype stay at home moms and assume things about them that

they really have no clue about. The way they are looked at is that mothers who are at home are

50s throwbacks. Also that we tend to portray at home mothers as unmotivated, depressed,

uneducated and all wealthy. These are only opinions not facts because this is just something

people think they know when they dont know or understand the hardships stay at home moms

go through.
Dr. Phil an American television personality, author, psychologist, and the host of the

television show Dr. Phil, which debuted in 2002. He has had four shows to be exact dealing with

the issue stay at home moms vs. working moms. The most recent show with this issue he said

was the best one they had yet. The two mothers he had that were presenting their opinion on TV

all made great points and made it hard to argue against. The best thing about this show was the

woman who he had chosen to talk about this issue. One was a regular stay at home mom and to

help argue the issue was a worker on the Dr. Phil show. A lot of working moms just cant
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understand mothers who want to do nothing (seems like a pretty busy nothing to me!) but

spend their days and nights with their children.(Pennington) Carla Pennington is the working

mom on the show. She pointed out that a lot of stay-at-home moms dismiss full-time career

mothers as selfish women who blatantly pursue a career at the expense of their children. She

strongly argued against this comment which offended her.

The reason for there being so many different support reasons for each side of the

argument is because this is the debate that people call The Debate that never dies. According to

the Oxford English Dictionary the word Mother means the female parent of a human being; a

woman in relation to a child or children to whom she has given birth; a woman who undertakes

the responsibilities of a parent towards a child. It just goes to show you that whether you are a

working mom or a stay at home mom you still have a huge responsibility in front of you which is

your child. Once you become a parent your whole life changes and as soon as you see your baby

you get attached more than you ever thought you would. As you can see I am more for working

moms than stay at home moms but you do have to think outside the box sometimes and see

where they are coming from. There is never a right path because the children are affected in so

many different ways and that makes it harder for the moms to make a decision. Mothers have it

harder than anybody else and they deserve a huge of amount of respect for what they go through

whether they are a stay at home mom or a working mom.

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Works Cited

"mother, n.1 (and int.)". OED Online. March 2012. Oxford University Press. 30 May 2012

<[Link]

Peters, Joan K. When Mothers Work: Loving Our Children without Sacrificing Our Selves.

Reading, MA: Addison-Wesley, 1997. Print.

"Dr. [Link] - Advice - Stay-at-Home Moms vs. Working Moms." Dr. [Link] - Advice - Stay-

at-Home Moms vs. Working Moms. Web. 30 May 2012.

<[Link]

"Stay-At-Home Moms vs. Working Moms." Stay-At-Home Moms vs. Working Moms. Web. 30

May 2012. <[Link]