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 Confi de n t ,
Determined
a n d C a r i n g

A Lucky Duck Book

Learning to be Confident INNER.i1 1 25/5/06 3:09:44 pm

Learning to be Confident INNER.i2 2 25/5/06 3:09:44 pm
 Promoting Children’s Resilience and Wellbeing

Learning to be

Confide n t ,
Determined
a n d C a r i n g

Karen Brunskill

Learning to be Confident INNER.i3 3 25/5/06 3:09:45 pm

 © Karen Brunskill 2006
First published 2006
Originally published in Australia as Values for Life Junior Level Primary Series Two 2002
Apart from any fair dealing for the purposes of research or private study, or criticism or review, as
permitted under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988, this publication may be reproduced,
stored or transmitted in any form, or by any means, only with the prior permission in writing of the
publishers, or in the case of reprographic reproduction, in accordance with the terms of licences
issued by the Copyright Licensing Agency. Enquiries concerning reproduction outside those terms
should be sent to the publishers.

The right of the author to be identified as Author of this work has been asserted by him/her in
accordance with the Copyright, Design and Patents Act 1988.
Paul Chapman Publishing
A SAGE Publications Company
1 Oliver’s Yard
55 City Road
London EC1Y 1SP
SAGE Publications Inc.
2455 Teller Road
Thousand Oaks, California 91320
SAGE Publications India Pvt Ltd.
B-42, Panchsheel Enclave
Post Box 4109
New Delhi 110 017
www.luckyduck.co.uk
Commissioning Editor: George Robinson
Editorial Team: Mel Maines, Sarah Lynch, Wendy Ogden
Designer: Nick Shearn
Illustrations: Katie Jardine, Ian Moule, Carlie Jennings, Tony Wynn, Lori Head, Hilda Knight
A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library
Library of Congress Control Number 2006900196
ISBN13 978-1-4129-1961-6
ISBN10 1-4129-1961-4 (pbk)
Printed on paper from sustainable resources
Printed in Great Britain by The Cromwell Press Ltd, Trowbridge, Wiltshire

Learning to be Confident INNER.i4 4 25/5/06 3:09:46 pm

 How to use the CD-ROM

The CD-ROM contains PDF files, labelled ‘Worksheets.pdf ’ which consists of the stories and worksheets
for each unit in this resource. You will need Acrobat Reader version 3 or higher to view and print these
resources.
The documents are set up to print to A4 but you can enlarge them to A3 by increasing the output
percentage at the point of printing using the page set-up settings for your printer.

Learning to be Confident INNER.i5 5 25/5/06 3:09:46 pm

Learning to be Confident INNER.i6 6 25/5/06 3:09:46 pm
 Contents

Foreword . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .ix
Introduction . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .1
Teacher’s Notes . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .1
Social, Emotional and Behavioural Skills . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .1
Creating Supportive Learning Environments. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .1
Development of Language Acquisition . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .2
Development of Wellbeing and Resilience . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .2
Guidelines for Value, Story and Resilience Links . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .3
How To Use This Book . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .5
The Programme . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .7
Confidence. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .9
At School . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .11
The Rollerblader . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .15
Frozen Statues . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .19
The Beach . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .23
Respect. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .27
Did You Ask? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .29
Mr Khatum’s Roses. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .33
Kate’s In The Shower . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .39
Our School Grounds . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .45
Courage . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .49
The Surprise . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .51
The Diving Board . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .55
The Holiday . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .59
The Chairlift . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .65
Determination . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .71
Keep On Trying . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .73
Just A Bit More . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .77
Let’s Go Riding . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .81
Mum’s Birthday. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .87
Caring . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .91
Caring For Young Ones . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .93
My Dad’s A Nurse . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .97
Grandpa’s Medals . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .101
The Chicken. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .105
Assertiveness . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .111
Let’s Go In Here . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .113
What I Do Well . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .117
Thiery’s Toys . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .121
The Blue Pencil . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .127
Bibliography . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .133

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Learning to be Confident INNER.i8 8 25/5/06 3:09:47 pm
 Foreword

The Promoting Children’s Resilience and Wellbeing series were originally published in Australia as the
Values for Life series of books, and when we saw them we felt they would provide valuable additions
to our range of books on emotional literacy. One of the attractions was that the four books provided a
coherent programme from early years through to 12.
Book 1: Learning to be Honest, Kind and Friendly (Age range: 5 to 7)
Book 2: Learning to be Confident, Determined and Caring (Age range: 5 to 7)
Book 3: Developing Consideration, Respect and Tolerance (Age range: 7 to 9)
Book 4: Enhancing Courage, Respect and Assertiveness (Age range: 9 to 12)
In Australia the term ‘emotional resilience’ is more widely used than in the UK, though the term is
increasingly current here. Resilience is the ability to recover from adversity or difficult situations or
circumstances. Fuller (2001) suggests that life events are ‘contagious’. Life events, both positive and
negative, establish chains of behaviour. If children are faced with negative events their interpretation of
these events will influence how they cope. If they don’t have resilience he is likely to react in a negative
way.
An example of a negative or risk chain would be:
a child who grows up in violent circumstances and learns to distrust others, enters school and
interprets the intention of others as hostile. The child then acts warily or aggressively towards peers
and develops peer relationship problems…
An example of a positive or protective chain would be:
a child who grows up in violent circumstances but learns, on entry to school, that there is a trustworthy
adult who can be relied on to assist in the resolution of peer relationship difficulties. The child’s
positive attempts to interact with others are acknowledged. The child begins to feel accepted, mixes
more appropriately with peers and develops a diversity of friendships. (Fuller, 2001)
The work of Goleman (1995) indicates that the promotion of protective factors in school life is not only
predictive of academic success but even more importantly for positive adult life outcomes.
The idea of positive factors that promote resilience has been supported by research (Resnick, Harris and
Blum, 1993; Fuller, McGraw and Goodyear, 1998). The main factors appear to be:
4 family connectedness
4 peer connectedness
4 fitting in at school.
Two of these can be directly influenced by school life, creating positive experiences that are ‘contagious’.
Resilience seems to depend largely on this sense of belonging. Once one belongs, empathy can develop
and empathy builds group cohesion where moral actions such as honesty, altruism and caring emerge
developmentally as the child matures.
This idea of resilience can be seen to be important in all areas of school life, as quoted in Fuller (2001):
When schools promote belonging and ensure high levels of involvement between staff and students,
bullying is reduced.
(Citing the work of Olweus, 1995; Rigby 1996.)

ix

Learning to be Confident INNER.i9 9 25/5/06 3:09:47 pm

 This series, with its progressive programme, allows the opportunity for young people to explore:
4 consideration 4 courage 4 tolerance
4 honesty 4 caring 4 respect
4 responsibility 4 friendliness 4 determination
4 confidence 4 kindness 4 assertiveness.
As children mature the level that these can be explored becomes deeper; their reasoning and morality
becomes more sophisticated with age and this type of programme can assist in their ‘connectedness’.
Our increasing awareness of the concept of ‘Citizenship’ should recognise elements such as empathy,
moral reasoning and moral behaviour.

Current UK initiatives
The Healthy Schools Programme identifies emotional health and wellbeing (including bullying) as one
of the areas schools have to develop and are required to produce evidence that they have met the
necessary criteria. The Healthy Schools Programme, of course, is not a separate entity divorced from all
other aspects of school development. The statutory components of PSHE and Citizenship for primary
schools can be linked to the concept of emotional health and wellbeing and, we would also argue,
emotional resilience.
The 12 domains covered in this programme fit the four components of PSHE and Citizenship at Key
Stage 1 and 2:
1. Developing confidence and responsibility and making the most of their abilities.
2. Preparing to play an active role as citizens.
3. Developing a healthy, safer lifestyle.
4. Developing good relationships and respecting the difference between people.
The introduction of developing children’s social, emotional and behavioural skills (SEBS) also highlights
the importance of the type of material presented in this book.
4 Emotional and social competence have been shown to be more influential than cognitive
abilities for personal, career and scholastic success.
4 Programmes that teach social and emotional competences have been shown to result in a wide
range of educational gains.
4 Work and workplace increasingly focus on social and emotional competences with increased
emphasis on teamwork, communication, management skills etc. (DfES, 2003)
Though resilience is not mentioned directly, SEBS clearly identifies the earlier point about the ‘contagious’
effects of life events.
Research is bringing home the wide extent of various types of neglect and abuse. This is being
exacerbated by the breakdown of extended family and communities which reduces support for the
nuclear family, and the higher rates of divorce and subsequent one-parent families. This has led to
a shake-up in belief that we can leave children’s emotional and social development to parents…
so schools have to provide the emotional and social guidance that some pupils currently lack.
(DfES, 2003)
However, helping young people develop emotional resilience isn’t just for young people from disturbed
or disturbing backgrounds. School life and home life can be stressful for all young people, and with the
growing awareness of the importance of emotional literacy, the Promoting Children’s Resilience and
Wellbeing series will be an ideal programme to support a key element, emotional resilience.

George Robinson and Barbara Maines

Learning to be Confident INNER.i10 10 25/5/06 3:09:48 pm

 Introduction

The Promoting Children’s Resilience and Wellbeing series is a whole–school, values based programme.
It is designed to assist in the creation of wellbeing and resilience in young students by introducing them
to a range of values and behaviours that, when practised, can promote social and emotional health.
The programme, stories and activiti are also designed to enhance the development of a positive
learning environment and literacy skills.
Learning to be Confident, Determined and Caring is suitable for 5 to 7 year olds. Each story introduces
young students to the language and associated behaviours of six important values relevant to the
development of social and emotional health of children in school settings:
1. Confidence
2. Respect
3. Courage
4. Determination
5. Caring
6. Assertiveness.

Teacher’s Notes

This series is designed to assist in the development of wellbeing and resilience in young students.
The values in the stories complement the following four areas:
1. Social, emotional and behavioural skills
2. Creation of supportive learning environments
3. Development of language acquisition
4. Development of wellbeing and resilience in young students.

Social, Emotional and Behavioural Skills

These stories introduce students, in a formal way, to the ‘language’ of prosocial values and behaviours
that assist in promoting social and emotional wellbeing. Each story focuses upon identifiable values and
behaviours that fit the requirements of the PSHE and Citizenship curriculum for children aged 5 to 12.

Creating Supportive Learning Environments

Students are more willing to participate in learning environments if they feel safe and secure in the
classroom and have a sense of connectedness or bonding with their teachers and peers. A secure and
supportive learning environment optimises the students’ willingness to take risks.
The Promoting Children’s Resilience and Wellbeing programme introduces students to the values and
behaviours that assist in promoting a sense of safety, security, and social and emotional wellbeing in
school settings. When practised, these values reinforce the development of three essential elements in
the construction and maintenance of effective teaching and learning environments:
1. A sense of safety and security.
2. A sense of belonging.
3. A sense of cooperation and harmony.

Learning to be Confident INNER.i1 1 25/5/06 3:09:48 pm

 Development of Language Acquisition
The stories in the Promoting Children’s Resilience and Wellbeing programme introduce young students
to the ‘language’ of prosocial values and behaviours. The stories are designed to expand knowledge and
understanding of many of the values and behaviours that assist in developing wellbeing, and to build
language skills via listening, reading, discussion and related activities.

Development of Wellbeing and Resilience

The Promoting Children’s Resilience and Wellbeing programme assists students in creating a better
understanding of some of the related values and behaviours that help to promote social and emotional
wellbeing and resilience. (See the chart on pages 3 and 4 for links.)
The stories are designed to support the development of resilience, focusing on three key areas:
1. Self-appreciation
Introducing concepts of self-worth, self-efficacy, problem-solving skills, responsibility, courage
to try new things, patience, acknowledging past successes and excellence.
2. Social competence
Introducing concepts of friendliness, helpfulness, caring, empathy, flexibility, sense of humour,
assertiveness, generosity, tolerance, courtesy, respect, fairness, cleanliness, cooperation,
honesty, reliability, stress and anxiety management skills and forgiveness.
3. Sense of optimistic future
Introducing concepts such as the importance of having goals, positive expectations,
enthusiasm, determination, perseverance, self-discipline, optimism and organisational skills.

Learning to be Confident INNER.i2 2 25/5/06 3:09:48 pm

 Guidelines for Value, Story and Resilience Links

These illustrate the links between the curriculum, value, story, resilience and wellbeing promoting
factors.

OPTIMISTIC FUTURE

RESILIENCE
WELLBEING
APPRECIATION

COMPETENCE

BETWEEN
STORY,
SENSE OF
VALUE

LINKS
TITLE

SOCIAL

AND
SELF-

At School
• • Recognition of the feeling that confidence brings and a
sense of achievement.
CONFIDENCE

The Rollerblader
• • Recognition that confidence is enhanced with the
mastering of a skill

Frozen Statues
• • • Recognition that social competence and confidence
develops with participation.

The Beach
• • Recognition of things done with confidence and having
a sense of fun.

Respecting the belongings of self and others. Developing

Did You Ask?
• • • good verbal communication. Maintaining future positive
relationships.

Building positive relationships with neighbours, so they

• •
RESPECT

Mr Khatum’s Roses can go there in the future. Demonstrating respect for

gardens.

Kate’s In The Shower

• • • Respecting individual privacy. Using cooperation to
overcome problems. Maintaining positive relationships.

Our School Grounds

• • Taking responsibility for the school grounds. Wanting a
pleasant environment for future play.

The Surprise
• • • Recognising the need for courage in some social
situations.
COURAGE

The Diving Board

• • Recognising that sometimes, to try a new skill, we need
to show courage.

Recognising that sometimes things that are unpleasant

The Holiday
• • are necessary, and that we may need courage to
complete an unpleasant task or requirement.

The Chairlift
• • Demonstrating courage by a willingness to participate in
new experiences.

Learning to be Confident INNER.i3 3 25/5/06 3:09:49 pm

 Guidelines for Value, Story and Resilience Links

OPTIMISTIC FUTURE

RESILIENCE
WELLBEING
APPRECIATION

COMPETENCE

BETWEEN
STORY,
SENSE OF
VALUE

LINKS
TITLE

SOCIAL

AND
SELF-

Keep On Trying
• • Developing and appreciating the skill of tying shoelaces,
DETERMINATION

so that in the future no help is needed.

Overcoming the problem of eating vegetables. Knowing

Just A Bit More
• • what is wanted afterwards. Using determination to
achieve an end.

Let’s Go Riding
• • Developing the skill of bike riding. Wanting to ride a bike
in the future. Setting a goal.

Mum’s Birthday
• • Developing the skill of cake making. Recognising special
events in other’s lives.

Caring For Young Ones

• • • The importance of caring for self and others.
Expectations of being able to care in relationships.

Recognition of the skill of caring professions. Using

• • •
CARING

My Dad’s A Nurse humour to help others feel better. Future employment in

caring industries.

Grandpa’s Medals
• • Recognition of Grandpa’s achievements. Personal
responsibility for the care of medals.

Being willing to take care of a sick animal. Knowing that

The Chicken
• • how we care for something may affect its future. Being
optimistic of a positive future.

Developing the skill of assertiveness. Being able to say,

Let’s Go In Here
• • • ‘No,’ to friends. Knowing how to use assertiveness in
ASSERTIVENESS

the future.

What I Do Well
• • Being able to recognise your own skills, and speaking in
an assertive manner to a group.

Recognising the importance of appreciating others and

Thiery’s Toys
• • • their belongings. Saying, ‘No,’ so the toys are in good
condition for future play.

The Blue Pencil

• • • Solving a problem. Acting in a cooperative, assertive and
friendly way. Having coloured pencils for all to use.

Learning to be Confident INNER.i4 4 25/5/06 3:09:49 pm

 How To Use This Book

To use the programme the facilitator will:

4 Choose a prosocial value as a focus.
4 Print or photocopy the relevant story for your students. Each story has two accompanying
activity sheets.
4 Read and discuss the story with the students identifying the specific prosocial values. This will
assist students in building a language of prosocial values and behaviours.
4 Ask the students to paste the story into a scrapbook. The scrapbook can be taken home and
read with the family.

Learning to be Confident INNER.i5 5 25/5/06 3:09:50 pm

Learning to be Confident INNER.i6 6 25/5/06 3:09:50 pm
 Promoting Children’s Resilience and Wellbeing

The Programme

1. Confidence

2. Respect
3. Courage
i n a t i o n
e te r m
4. D

5. Caring
6. Assertiveness

Learning to be Confident INNER.i7 7 25/5/06 3:09:52 pm

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